#i've been having a lot of tegan feelings lately

[stephadoo]

#tegan jovanka #doctor who #the master #dwedit #gifs #does this make sense idk #i've been having a lot of tegan feelings lately

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC REVIEW: The Other Side of Disappearing by Kate Clayborn

4.25/5. Releases 3/26/24.

Vibes: true crime podcasts (critical), soft hero/hard heroine, complicated families, and dropping those defenses even when it's hard

Heat Index: 6/10

Ten years ago, Jess and Tegan's mother disappeared--with her con artist boyfriend Lynton Baltimore, made famous by a popular podcast. Now, the podcast's creator is on their doorstep with her protegee, Adam. They want to find Lynton; and Jess and Tegan could be their key. The last thing Jess wants to do after raising her sister on her own is go down this rabbit hole. But if Tegan is going, so is she; and as they unravel their mother's secrets, Jess finds herself more exposed than she's ever been before... and, even more horrifyingly, opening up to Adam (and his massive shoulders, perfect for crying into).

I was a little worried by the premise of this book. Don't get me wrong, it's a great idea--but was it going to be women's fiction? The answer: nope! This is a great example of how to write a book that has a big plot, and has well-developed characters beyond the two leads... while still being a romance. That's something that used to be way more of a norm, but I've noticed lately that it seems to have become all or nothing. You're either all focus on the leads, no plot and paper-thin supporting characters, or the romance gets crumpled up and it's women's fiction. (Which is fine! Women's fiction is fine! It's just generally not my thing.)

Trust Kate Clayborn to give you all the feelings about EVERYONE involved, along with a thought-provoking and twisty-turny concept, while never sacrificing the strength of the love story. I was so invested in Adam, a truly good dude who isn't without his own sore spots, slowly worming his way into Jess's heart. And Jess is simply a great heroine--wounded and tough and a bit angry but also desperately holding it together for the sister she's raised. I loved watching them fall in love. In fact, this is probably my favorite Kate Clayborn book so far.

Quick Takes:

--I am very vocal about finding a lot of good guy heroes boring, and that is because "good" often seems to translate into "perfect" or "completely toothless". Adam is a great example of how to write a good guy hero correctly. Kate Clayborn generally knows how to write about good people who aren't perfect and are compelling.

Here, Adam is essentially a gentle giant with great intentions in the long term... Who still compromises his morals initially. (Not for long! and I would say that she could've pushed him to compromise those morals for a bit longer, but I get it.) And he doesn't always handle everything perfectly, and he's not always smooth, and he's interesting and hot and kind of the boyfriend I feel is ideal without being PERFECT.

Also: his ears go pink when he's embarrassed, and he is definitely a bit embarrassed about his Bigness. Like, he's always bumping into shit because he's so Big, and that's embarrassing, you guys!!! This is. So important to me.

--I'm so into the Eldest Daughter Syndrome Stuff, as an eldest daughter. Jess and Tegan's relationship is so great, sitting in that space between parent and sibling, and at a really awkward point (as Tegan just turned eighteen). I found Jess deeply relatable, and her prickliness makes perfect sense... while still getting in her way.

Honestly, Jess's character growth is the type of thing I don't think heroines are allowed to do enough? It's introspective and difficult, and I absolutely loved where we ended up.

--There's a supporting character, original podcast creator/Adam's mentor Salem, who went in some really different directions. I kind of loved having a character who was like... not malevolent, but not wholly good, too? Who was selfish, and not an ideal parent, and a LADY?

In general, the commentary on true crime fandom stuff and podcasting is so good. I think we've definitely reached this point where true crime podcasts have really dipped heavily into exploitation. Of course there are good ones! But let us be real. I loved the way that she confronted this being both a story and Jess and Tegan's lives. And, in addition, how knowing that early on conflicts with Adam's sense of morality.

--As a random note... I've noticed recently that a lot of romance novels, even those by people I so love, have parents do some really shitty stuff, and then shove in this reconciliation with their kids at the end. I think this has to do with the need for an HEA. But like. You can have an HEA that involves acknowledging that your parent is shitty and doesn't deserve forgiveness. Trust.

All I'll say is that I really loved how Clayborn handled the parent stuff in this book.

The Sex:

Kate Clayborn always leans more towards the romantic than the explicit in her sex scenes, though they are open door. There are a few scenes in this book, and they're reeeeally sensual. I loved the way she wrote the dialogue during sex scenes, and like, the sexiness of Jess and Adam sneaking around on this road trip with her teenage sister right there. Ooh, it was hot.

Insightful, romantic, and challenging in some ways, The Other Side of Disappearing really impressed me. I already liked Kate Clayborn, and this only made me more excited about her future work.

Thanks to NetGalley and Kensington for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

#romance novel blogging #romance novels #arc reviews #book reviews #book recs #book recommendations #books #netgalley

[headcanonsandmore]

"All Alone (For The Holidays)", Chapter Three

Summary: Tegan and Nyssa explore the sights of Stirling. But the mix of the holiday atmosphere and their growing closeness may just help them realise some things...

~~~~~~~~~~~~

My apologies for the lateness of this chapter, everyone; I originally intended to publish this about a week ago, but I've been bedridden for most of the holiday period with a bug. I am thankfully up and on the mend now, so please enjoy this chapter despite the unfortunate delay (hopefully the extended length may compensate for the wait).

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Read on AO3.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tegan stirred slightly.

She was dimly aware that she was cuddled up against something, and that the something was very soft and very warm. As to what the something was aside from that, she had no idea. And found it difficult to focus her brain to think further about it.

Letting out a contented sigh, the Australian nuzzled closer.

‘Tegan…’ said a soft voice, gently. It sounded familiar. ‘…you might want to move.’

Tegan groaned, and nuzzled yet further into the softness.

‘Why…’ she mumbled, sleepily.

‘Because breakfast finishes at 9 and, while I do enjoy having your head nuzzled into my chest, I don’t want us to be late.’

Tegan’s eyes snapped open as she realised where she was, what she was doing, and who was speaking. With dawning terror, she moved her head upwards out of the softness she had been nuzzling against.

‘Good morning,’ said Nyssa Traken, with a giggle as she looked down at the Australian. ‘I take it you slept well.’

‘E-er…’ Tegan stammered, feeling her face burn. With a start, she came to the realisation that she was lying on top of Nyssa. Several very soft places were pressing against her, including one of either side of her head. ‘I… er…’

‘Not that I’m complaining, but you may want to move both your hands.’

Hands?

Tegan suddenly became aware that one of her hands was on Nyssa’s upper leg, while the other was on Nyssa’s side nearby her armpit, dangerously close to… to…

Tegan pulled herself quickly off Nyssa, becoming tangled in the duvet and landing with a bodily thud on the mattress next to her. It was already half-light, and weak sunshine was beginning to filter through the curtains.

‘S-sorry!’ she stammered, feeling her stomach churn with a lot of conflicting emotions. ‘I-I swear I didn’t mean to…’

‘Oh, no matter,’ Nyssa said, cheerfully, sitting up and flashing a smile. ‘You’re very adorable when you’re all dozy first thing in the morning.’

‘I… I… did I…’

‘I thought it best to wake you before your hands started moving places you’d been mortified about when conscious.’

‘Oh, no!’ Tegan put her face in her hands and groaned.

She could hear Nyssa giggling. A few seconds later, the mattress dipped slightly, as Nyssa got out of bed.

‘Oh, please don’t be embarrassed,’ Nyssa said, still giggling. ‘I consider it very flattering.’

‘That’s easy for you to say! You weren’t the one who… who…’

‘True, but it was rather enjoyable nonetheless. I’ll hop in the shower first, if that’s alright?’

‘S-sure,’ Tegan said, not trusting herself to look round.

‘Thank you.’

There was the sound of the bathroom door closing. A few seconds later, there was the sound of a nightie hitting the floor.

Tegan ignored the fizzing in her stomach, and sat up against the headboard. She picked up her book, desperately trying not to think about the woman currently having a shower barely a few feet away.

Rather enjoyable?

Oh, dear…

*

Tegan was still feeling a little flustered when she and Nyssa left the room half an hour later. The Englishwoman seemed completely at ease, but Tegan couldn’t ignore the butterflies in her stomach, mixed with a certain amount of fizz that refused to go away.

She had tried to take a cold shower, but she was frazzled nonetheless. Well, hopefully she’d feel better after eating breakfast. It was a little easier to be calm around Nyssa when the younger woman was wearing more than just a sheer nightie, after all.

Not much easier. But it was easier.

‘Ah, Mrs and Mrs Jovanka-Traken,’ said the middle aged man behind the front desk. He was tall, with long sideburns and a working class southern English accent. His name-tag identified him as “Benton”. ‘Breakfast is being served in the communal eating area’

Tegan goggled at him, but Nyssa simply nodded, smiled and thanked the man. Blinking quickly, Tegan stumbled after the Englishwoman.

Tegan was in a state of barely-disguised shock by the time she sat down.

‘M… Mrs and Mrs Jovanka-Traken?’ she whispered, after one of the waiting staff (a young man called Ryan) carefully poured them both a cup of tea.

‘They probably just got confused,’ Nyssa replied, apparently not remotely bothered. ‘I mean, most single women don’t share a bed in a bed-and-breakfast, do they do.’

‘Doesn’t it bother you?’

‘Well, I admit it is a change,’ Nyssa replied, taking a sip of her tea. ‘But it could be a lot worse. Yasmin was probably so tired that she didn’t write our individual surnames.’

‘I guess. Still…’

‘Tegan, it’s fine; please don’t worry about it. This isn’t just because you’re embarrassed about feeling me up during the night-’

‘No!’ Tegan exclaimed, cheeks flushing. ‘Will you please stop mentioning that?’

‘And miss out on you getting adorably embarrassed?’ Nyssa giggled, smirking. ‘Oh, all right; if you insist… Mrs Jovanka-Traken.’

Tegan relented, and let out a chuckle, before taking a sip from her own cup. It was hard to feel too embarrassed, given how utterly unbothered had been about it. A few moments later, their highland breakfasts arrived, and the two women spent a few minutes tucking in before they resumed talking.

‘So… what do you want to do today?’

Nyssa stared at her.

‘What?’

‘We’re stuck in Stirling for the foreseeable future,’ Tegan elaborated. ‘We might as well have a look around the city.’

‘I…’ Nyssa’s eyes had widened in confusion. ‘You… you want to spend the day with me?’

‘Well… yeah,’ Tegan said, feeling slightly bashful. ‘I mean, if that’s okay with you?’

Nyssa’s mouth broke into a wonderfully soft smile.

‘Oh, Tegan,’ she said, grey-green eyes twinkling. ‘That’s more than okay with me. You’re so sweet.’

‘N-no worries.’

‘Where shall we go first?’

‘Well…’ Tegan said, thinking for a moment. ‘I’ve heard the castle is supposed to be a worthwhile visit, so we can head there first. Then get some lunch, and afterwards maybe look around the shops.’

‘Wonderful!’ Nyssa exclaimed. ‘It’s a date!’

Tegan smiled, ignoring the spike in her heartrate at that description. 

*

The castle was, of course, spectacular.

It had taken them both a while to walk up from the city centre itself, but the views were absolutely worth it.

The castle stood on the top of a large hill overlooking the city. There was the mighty Forth, snaking its way through the landscape and, in the distance, Tegan and Nyssa could make out the enormous stone tower of the National Wallace Monument. It was a fantastic-looking landscape, and Tegan had seen a fair few in her time.

Nyssa pulled out her phone, and immediately turned it towards Tegan.

‘Cheese!’

Tegan smiled, and Nyssa took the picture.

‘Oh, you look beautiful!’ Nyssa said, as she hurried over. ‘Look, see…’

Nyssa selected the photo, and looked up, only to see that Tegan’s eyes had not moved from her face.

The Australian blinked quickly and looked down.

‘O-oh, it looks good, yeah,’ Tegan stammered, before coughing. ‘Dunno about beautiful but-’

‘You are,’ Nyssa said, softly. ‘You are, Tegan.’

The cold wind whipped their faces, and the two women edged closer together. It wasn’t snowing much, but it was enough that Nyssa’s pale skin was tinged with a pinkness. Oh…

Nyssa smiled at Tegan again, and gestured over her shoulder. Nodding, Tegan followed her. They set off for the castle itself, heading through the large gatehouse which provided some shelter from the elements. Once they had entered the main castle itself, they found themselves warming up, and quickly took off their hats and gloves.

Normally, Tegan wasn’t that fussed about history, but Nyssa was clearly in her element. The Englishwoman had clearly been trying to hold in her excitement because, once they had started looking around, her eyes had lit up and she began discussing the history of the place.

Well, “discussion” wasn’t the right word, given that she was talking so animatedly and excitedly about it. It was more like staring into a very happy sun, and Tegan wasn’t remotely irritated.

In fact, when Nyssa stopped for breath to stare around the throne room they had arrived in, Tegan found herself unable to tear her eyes from the younger woman.

‘Tegan?’

‘Hm?’ Tegan grunted, blinking as she realised had said something. ‘Sorry; what were you saying?’

‘I was saying,’ Nyssa said, with a giggle. ‘that I hope I’m not boring you with my ramblings. I know I have a habit of…’

‘Infodumping? It’s all good,’ Tegan replied. ‘I think it’s amazing how you can remember all this stuff.’

‘Oh, stop it…’

‘I’m serious!’

Nyssa’s cheeks flushed red, and Tegan felt her stomach flip over.

Was this a date? The Australian wasn’t sure. She had been on a few dates in her time, but this was… different. For one thing, she was already sharing a room with this woman. She’d woken with their limbs entangled and her head in Nyssa’s bosom that morning, for goodness’ sake!

Not that she was trying to remember that, of course. Definitely not.

But when Nyssa was smiling at her like that, with her cheeks flushed and mouth stretched into a warm smile, Tegan found it rather difficult to think of much else aside from the wonderful woman stood barely a foot away from her.

*

They eventually arrived back in the city centre around lunchtime, rather hungry and cold, but cheeks flushed with exertion. They quickly made for a nearby café, ordered hot food, and sequestered themselves in a warm booth with two large cappuccinos.

‘Well, that was wonderful!’ Nyssa said, sighing contentedly as she cradled her mug in her hands. ‘Thank you for suggesting the castle, Tegan; I had such a fun time.’

‘No worries,’ Tegan said, smiling across the table at her. ‘Glad you enjoyed yourself; didn’t I say this would be a fun idea?’

Nyssa giggled.

‘And you were right,’ she said, but her smile then slipped and doubt crossed her face. ‘Did… did you enjoy it?’

‘Of course!’ Tegan replied, earnestly. ‘You’re so passionate about it; how could I not enjoy it?’

Nyssa’s cheeks pinkened slightly.

‘I…. thank you,’ she said, shyly. ‘Usually, people tend to switch off when I start getting excited about things.’

‘Those people are clearly not worth your time.’

Nyssa smiled.

‘Thank you, Tegan. For the record, you are absolutely worth my time.’

Tegan felt her heart well.

‘Nyssa…’ she said, leaning forwards slightly. ‘Everytime you talk about people not respecting you, it… oh, Nys…’

‘It’s fine, Tegan. I’m going to the Orkneys on my own,’ Nyssa said, softly. ‘Because there’s no-one else.’

Without thinking, Tegan reached out and gently squeezed Nyssa’s hand with her own.

‘There’s me.’

The grey-green eyes met the brown, and Tegan found her heart beating frantically against her chest.

Nyssa’s cheeks dimpled as she gave a gentle smile.

‘You really are too sweet, Tegan,’ the Englishwoman replied, quietly. The look of quiet sadness in her eyes was enough to make Tegan’s heart ache. ‘But I couldn’t ask that of you. You have family to see-’

Tegan squeezed her hand.

‘If I can’t come with you,’ she said, almost at a whisper. ‘Then can I at least make sure you have a good time here in Stirling?’

Nyssa blinked, tears forming in her eyes.

‘O-okay.’

*

They walked through the snow-covered streets. At some point, Nyssa’s hand found Tegan’s, but neither of them commented on it. Their faces were pinkened from the cold, so Tegan had no idea whether Nyssa’s face was also flushed as hers was.

She hoped it was, though.

Tegan’s boots gently crushed the snow underfoot as she followed Nyssa, trying not to stumble too much. The feeling of their gloved hands intertwined was rather wonderful; she almost wished it wasn’t so cold, so she could Nyssa’s skin against her own.

‘So… shopping?’

‘Alright. Do you have anything you want to get?’

‘No. This is your day,’ Tegan replied, squeezing the younger woman’s hand. ‘We’re here for you.’

Nyssa’s face seemed to flush deeper.

‘I don’t think I really need any new clothing.’

‘Nys,’ -and Tegan found herself again using the nickname- ‘Please. Just humour me.’

Nyssa smiled, cheeks dimpling again.

‘Oh, alright,’ she chuckled. ‘If I must.’

They found themselves in a shop selling a lot of various tartan things. It was obviously a touristy place, but Tegan didn’t really mind. It was hard to mind when Nyssa was gazing so intently around them.

Over the next fifteen minutes, Nyssa compiled a small bunch of things she wanted to try, and headed into the changing rooms. Tegan stood around nearby, looking in vague curiosity around her. She wondered how much the staff got paid during the winter season. Were they unionised? That was -she though, happily- becoming much more common nowadays, despite the difficulties of the retail sector. She nodded in greeting as a shop assistant emerged from the storage room door and came to stand behind the till area nearby.

There was the sound of curtains being slid aside, and Tegan turned.

‘How… how do I look?’

Nyssa was wearing a long tartan skirt. It was of a light burgundy pattern and swung as she walked out of the changing room. Her eyes seemed to glitter under the overhead lights, and her hair dangled softly off her shoulders onto her burgundy jumper. Seemingly oblivious to her own mesmerising quality, Nyssa fixed Tegan with a smile, and the Australian felt her mouth hang half-open.

Tegan could also suddenly feel her heartbeat in her ears.

‘Er… Tegan?’ Nyssa said. ‘How do I-’

‘B-beautiful,’ Tegan stammered, quickly. ‘You look beautiful.’

Nyssa smiled wider, cheeks flushed.

‘You… you think so?’

‘Course. I could hardly think anything else, could I?’

‘Tegan…’ Nyssa said, softly. ‘I… well-’

‘Oh, your wife looks lovely!’ exclaimed the shop assistant, smiling widely as they hurried over. ‘That pattern matches your eyes so well, ma’am!’

W-wife?

Tegan blinked hurriedly.

Nyssa bit down softly on her lower lip, clearly trying not to smile too much.

Tegan turned away, ostensibly to put her hat on but mostly so that Nyssa couldn’t see the wide grin threatening to overwhelm her mouth.

*

The sun had already set, and the city streets were covered in lights for the holiday season. Everywhere, people were excitedly discussing their plans, their arms weighed down with bags of gifts.

As Tegan and Nyssa headed through the crowded streets, they came across someone trying to hoist -was that a sofa?- into a van.

‘Martha, you alright on that side?

‘Almost… there we go!’

The woman called Martha high-fived the other woman and walked off. The other woman then turned, and Tegan realised that she recognised her.

‘Yasmin?’

‘Oh, hello,’ said the young Yorkshirewoman, wiping sweat from her brow. ‘How are you both? Enjoying your stay.’

‘Very much so, yes,’ replied Nyssa, with a smile. ‘Er… why were you moving what appears to be a gift-wrapped sofa?’

Yaz’s cheeks flushed.

‘Well… my partners always been on about getting a purple sofa so…’

Tegan and Nyssa exchanged a smile.

‘I’m sure they’ll love it,’ Tegan said, turning back to Yaz. ‘Your partner sounds a bit of a character.’

‘They are,’ Yaz said, smiling softly. ‘They’re… absolutely brilliant.’

Tegan and Nyssa smiled.

*

A good hour later, Tegan and Nyssa, sat back in their chairs, feeling just full enough to feel relaxed. They had just finished eating; the Italian restaurant they had found was rather lovely, and filled with the happy chatter of people looking forward to the holiday season. There were even a few tables clearly made up of work holiday parties.

‘Tegan,’ Nyssa asked. ‘Have you noticed how we keep getting mistaken for a married couple?’

‘Er…’ Tegan mumbled, feeling her stomach flip over. ‘Yeah. That… yeah.’

Nyssa giggled.

‘You don’t sound pleased about it.’

‘I am pleased!’ Tegan exclaimed, before realising what she had just said and feeling her face flush scarlet.

Nyssa let out another giggle.

‘Well, that’s good,’ she said, cheeks dimpling. ‘Because I am too. You’d make a woman very happy, Tegan.’

‘Thanks,’ Tegan said, quietly. ‘Er… have you enjoyed today, by the way?’

‘Yes,’ Nyssa replied, with a wide smile. ‘I’m very happy indeed.’

‘Oh. Er… good. Pleased to hear it.’

Nyssa reached across the table and squeezed Tegan’s hand.

‘Did you enjoy today?’

Tegan’s stomach did another flip.

‘Y-yeah,’ she stammered. ‘But it’s not over yet.’

‘True. Oh, the sales assistant in that shop gave me a flyer for something happening this evening, let me grab it…’

A few seconds later, she had passed the flyer over.

‘Fireworks, by the looks of it…’ Tegan said, before looking up to Nyssa.  ‘Fancy watching?’

‘It does sound wonderful,’ Nyssa replied, with a nod. ‘Are you happy to?’

‘Oh, absolutely!’ Tegan exclaimed, grinning as she stood up. ‘C’mon, we can get some mulled wine on the way!’

Nyssa chuckled, and wrapped her fingers around Tegan’s outstretched hand. The Australian’s cheeks flushed slightly.

*

Tegan and Nyssa arrived at the venue for the fireworks. It was nearby the castle, with a view over the surrounding valley. The night sky was picturesque and filled with stars which twinkled softly. The snow crunched under their boots.

‘Look there,’-Nyssa leaned close to Tegan and pointed upwards-‘That’s Orion’s Belt, see?’

Tegan nodded, suddenly feeling her heartrate accelerate at the close proximity. She could practically feel Nyssa’s breath on her face, and could smell the beautiful scent of her hair, despite the woolly hat pushed down to just above her eyes.

The Englishwoman smiled in the half-light, and gave Tegan a squeeze around the middle. Tegan felt gooseflesh erupt up both her sides, and she returned Nyssa’s smile breathlessly.

Nyssa, who was apparently unaware of the effect she was having, put her hand down but continued to stand close, presumably due to the large amount of people around them.

There were a fair few people who had clearly been delayed on their train journeys as well, but the vast majority were locals.

At a platform a short way off, a man climbed up the stairs and stood with his arms aloft.

‘It’s Mayor McCrimmon!’ exclaimed a local nearby.

‘Good old Jamie!’ said another. 

‘Welcome!’ exclaimed Jamie McCrimmon, smiling widely. ‘To Stirling’s Fireworks Display! Thank you all for coming along this evening, and we hope you enjoy it!’

There was a cheer from the crowd, and Tegan and Nyssa joined in with the clapping. After the noise had died down, Jamie McCrimmon turned around.

‘Ace, hit the starter!’

A woman in a jacket (covered in patches) grinned, and hit the button. She then hurried back and wrapped her arm around a pretty woman with long bushy red hair.

The fireworks exploded above them, and there was an admiring whoop from the crowd. The sky was suddenly full of explosions in all sorts of colours.

Tegan turned, about to comment to Nyssa about how beautiful the fireworks looked.

Nyssa was gazing happily into the night sky, her face reflected in the pink-and-purple lights from the fireworks above. Her grey-green eyes glittered in delight, and her mouth was formed into a wonderful smile.

Tegan’s words died in her mouth, and she felt her heart ache.

*

‘Oh, that was wonderful!’

Nyssa was smiling happily as she removed her hat. The two women had followed the rest of the crowd back down to the city centre, and had found themselves in a lovely pub in a back street. Tegan nodded, removing her own hat and following Nyssa through the crowd of merry people towards a quiet alcove.

A band were gearing up to play nearby.

‘Glad you enjoyed it,’ Tegan said, sitting down across the table from Nyssa. ‘The night’s still young; do you fancy getting some drinks?’

‘Sounds lovely,’ Nyssa replied, cheeks dimpling as she smiled. ‘I’ll have some mulled wine; hang on, let me get my purse-’

‘Nah, it’s fine,’ Tegan said, waving her hand absentmindedly. ‘You insisted on paying for the firework tickets, after all. Let me get this round, alright?’

Nyssa giggled.

‘Oh, how chivalrous, Mrs Jovanka-Traken.’

Tegan felt her face burn, but she couldn’t stop the smile that spread across her face. She stood up and headed across the room to the bar. After gently elbowing her way through the patrons who had already been served, she leaned against the bar and saw-

‘What the- Yasmin? What are you doing here?’

‘I work here as well,’ replied the young woman, with a smile. ‘I see you and your wife are having a nice time.’

‘She’s…’ Tegan began, before deciding it was too late to correct that mistake. ‘Yeah, we’re having a wonderful evening. Did you get that sofa home without your partner knowing?’

‘Eventually,’ Yasmin chuckled. ‘They’re super excited about finding out what their mystery present is gonna be. As for me, I’m mainly looking forward to having a little time off work and relaxing at home with the person I love, to be honest.’

‘I used to work in retail; I know the feeling.’

‘Thanks. So, what’ll it be?’

‘Two mulled wines, please.’

About a minute later, Yasmin handed over the drinks and Tegan paid.

‘Thanks, Yasmin. Happy Holidays.’

‘You too. Send my regards to Nyssa.’

Tegan smiled, nodded, picked up the drinks and headed back through the crowd. She gently set Nyssa’s drink down in front of her.

‘Thank you,’ said the Englishwoman, with a smile. ‘Cheers!’

‘Cheers!’

Their mugs gently clinked together and they drank.

‘Was that Yasmin you were speaking to at the bar?’

‘Yeah. She sends her regards. Although she still thinks you’re my wife.’

‘Oh, what a shame,’ Nyssa giggled, with a smile. ‘However will I cope, knowing that people think I’m married to the delectable Tegan Jovanka?’

Tegan found her cheeks flushing.

‘I… I suppose I could the same about you.’

Nyssa’s own cheeks pinkened prettily.

They passed the next few minutes in silence, as they nursed their drinks. They could hear the band beginning to warm up.

‘Er…’ Tegan said, feeling a little awkward. She quickly downed the rest of her mulled wine, and drew courage from the cosy feeling it gave in her stomach. ‘Fancy a dance?’

‘I’d thought you’d never ask,’ Nyssa replied, face flushing slightly. ‘Yes, please.’

Tegan stood, took Nyssa’s outstretched hand and led her out of the alcove.

“There’s a story I’ve heard told… of an unfamiliar road…”

The two women stood up and began to sway in time with the music. Nyssa reached out and took Tegan’s hand in her own. The Australian could feel her heart welling with delight and exhilaration, oblivious to the world outside of her and the woman dancing barely a few inches in front of her.

“Cause I want to dance with a Highland girl… where the skies reach out for miles… I want to feel the breeze of the Hebrides on the far side of the world…”

The two women swayed faster, and the Englishwoman gave a happy laugh as Tegan spun her around.

As they came together, Nyssa’s face was now close enough that Tegan could see herself reflected in those grey-green eyes.

The song ended, and the audience erupted in applause, to which Tegan and Nyssa joined in. Had the song really ended? It felt like they had barely been dancing for a few seconds, but maybe that was because Tegan hadn’t wanted it to end.

The two women then headed back to the alcove. However, as they made to sit down, Tegan realised that Nyssa had not let go of her hand.

‘Oh,’ Nyssa said, looking upwards. ‘Look at that.’

Tegan’s eyes followed. Sure enough, it was a clipping of mistletoe, suspended to the ceiling above.

‘Yeah…’ Tegan breathed, softly. ‘I’ve heard it’s bad luck not to… not to…’

‘I’ve heard that too,’ Nyssa said, her cheeks flushing beautifully in the half-light. ‘Care to test it out?’

Tegan’s joy was clearly visible on her face, because Nyssa then gave a giggle and leaned forwards, pressing her lips to those of the awestruck Australian.

Nyssa’s hand came to gently rest on Tegan’s back, pulling them closer together. Tegan found that one of her own hands had ended up enmeshed in the back of Nyssa’s jumper, while the other had reached up behind her head, sinking into the soft tresses of the Englishwoman’s curls.

Their lips parted.

‘Wow…’

Nyssa giggled.

‘Indeed,’ she said, smiling happily, cheeks aflush. ‘That was rather wonderful, wasn’t it.’

‘Agreed,’ Tegan said, with a grin. ‘I think we ought to go ahead, just to make sure it wasn’t just a fluke.’

Nyssa grinned, and pressed her lips to Tegan’s once again.

*

Tegan closed the door behind them, and bent down to take off her boots. Nyssa was already removing her hat and coat.

Tegan placed her boots onto the mat, put her hat and coat away in the wardrobe, and then strode over to the bed, removing her jumper as she did so. This had been a wonderful day, she thought. She’d never imagined that she’d get to kiss Nyssa and her heart was still beating happily against her chest. Her stomach gave a shiver. But maybe the kissing had just been the emotions of the evening getting away with them. There was no way that Nyssa would be interested in-

There was the sound of a jumper hitting the bed nearby, and Tegan looked up.

Nyssa was stood at the foot of the bed, shaking her head slightly to move her hair out of her eyes. She was already undoing the buttons of her shirt and, a few seconds later, the shirt joined the jumper on the bed, followed by her trousers.

Tegan felt her mouth fall open, and she gazed in awe at the woman stood barely a few feet away.

Nyssa’s eyes met hers, and the Englishwoman’s cheeks seemed to flush. She began to fold her clothes neatly, and then crossed the room to pack them away and place her shirt on a hanger.

Tegan’s gaze followed her and, as Nyssa returned, her eyes were glinting in the soft light of the room. 

A few seconds later, Nyssa’s underthings had also been discarded. The woman stood, pale skin reflected in the cosy light of the room, and smiled shyly.

‘Can… can you pass me my nightdress?’

Dazed, Tegan nodded and picked up the requested item, which she held out to Nyssa. Nyssa moved her arm, and her fingers skimmed softly along Tegan’s arm, sending gooseflesh along the Australian’s skin.

The nightie fell limply from Tegan’s hand, landing softly on the floor with a gentle swoosh.

Neither woman made any attempt to pick it up.

‘Enjoying the view?’ Nyssa said, very softly, cheeks flushed as she stepped closer. Her hand came to rest on Tegan’s waist.

‘Er…. you could say that, yeah.’

Nyssa giggled, twirling a curl of brown hair over her ear with her other hand and looking at Tegan through her long eyelashes.

‘S-sorry, I’m being a perv,’ Tegan stammered, bolting past Nyssa and stepping over to the wardrobe. She placed her jumper onto the shelf inside. ‘I’ll just get changed in the bathroom and-’

But, at that moment, Tegan’s mouth promptly forgot how to work, because Nyssa stepped up behind her and slid her arms around Tegan’s waist. The Australian was suddenly aware of two very soft places pressing gently into her back, and the smell of Nyssa’s engulfing her senses.

‘You’re not being a perv,’ came Nyssa’s voice, barely an inch from her ear. ‘You’re being wonderful, as always.’

Tegan gave a giddy breath, heartrate accelerating.

‘Too much?’ Nyssa whispered, into her ear. ‘I can stop if you-’

‘N-no, it’s fine,’ Tegan replied, eyes fluttering shut as Nyssa gently began to press kisses to her neck. ‘I… ooh…’

‘I can go as slow as you want,’ Nyssa breathed, softly. ‘If I’m pushing you too hard, just say the word and I’ll stop.’

‘I… I don’t want you to stop,’ Tegan replied, scarcely able to focus on anything aside from the feel of Nyssa’s lips against her skin and the way Nyssa’s hands were already beginning to slip under the material of Tegan’s trousers. ‘K-kinda the opposite, to be honest…’

‘That’s good,’ Nyssa said, before inclining her head and softly pressing her lips to Tegan’s.

The kiss was long, tender and immensely delicate. Tegan felt as if her feet were levitating off the floor. With a soft thud, Tegan’s trousers descended to the floor.

One of Nyssa’s hands began to gently slip inbetween the buttons of Tegan’s shirt.

‘Can… can I…’

Tegan nodded, breathlessly.

Nyssa’s skilled hands began to work at the buttons and, a few moments later, the garment lay at Tegan’s feet.

Tegan turned around, and wrapped her arms around Nyssa’s waist. Her stomach fizzed excitedly as the younger woman pressed their bodies together. Their lips were hungry as they met, and Tegan felt Nyssa’s hands slip down her back, working the clasp until the material relented. As the undergarment was discarded over Nyssa’s shoulder, the Englishwoman’s hands slipped further down Tegan’s back, eventually slipping under the thin material of her knickers and sinking into the soft flesh of her-

Tegan moaned against Nyssa’s lips, and the Englishwoman seemed to take strength from this, her tongue slipping inside Tegan’s mouth.

Tegan’s legs gave a shudder.

‘Beautiful,’ Nyssa whispered, her eyes sparkling as her pulled back. ‘Utterly beautiful.’

‘I could say the same of you,’ replied the Australian.

Tegan leaned forward and pressed her lips tightly to Nyssa’s.

The two women, kissing as their lives depended on it, stumbled across the room back to the bed. They landed on the duvet with a gentle thud, and Nyssa slipped her hands around the thin material of Tegan’s knickers, pulling them off with a fluid motion.

‘Oh,’ Nyssa said, with a wide happy smile. ‘Well, I must be doing something right.’

‘T-that’s an understand,’ Tegan stammered, breathlessly, as Nyssa straddled her thighs. Their lips met. God, this was amazing! This was incredible! This was-

As one, Tegan and Nyssa’s phones beeped.

The two women shared a quizzical look. Nyssa climbed off of Tegan, and they both reached for their phones.

Your previously-halted train to Aberdeen will be departing from Stirling tomorrow morning at 9.15am.

Tegan felt as if the bottom of her stomach had fallen out. Looking up, she saw that Nyssa’s face had gone oddly slack, as if trying to disguise her own shock.

‘Nys…’

‘Yes, Tegan?’

‘I…  given that this is our last night in Stirling...’

Nyssa nodded.

‘What…’ Tegan said, slowly. ‘What do you want to do?’

Nyssa leaned forward, pressing their lips tight together again. Her tongue slipped inside, tenderly.  Tegan gave a moan against Nyssa’s lips, and the Englishwoman pressed herself closer. Tegan could feel a lot of very soft places pressing against her. Her stomach began to fizz more and more intensely, and her heart was pounding in her ears.

Nyssa gave Tegan’s rear end a squeeze as she pulled back slightly, her eyes hungry as she stared into Tegan’s brown orbs.

‘I want to make some memories with you.’

Tegan nodded, pressed her lips to the Englishwoman’s, and their bodies melted together within the small confines of the room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thanks for reading, everyone; hope you enjoyed this chapter! I really wanted to highlight the cosiness and softness between Tegan and Nyssa, so hopefully it came across that way. Happy holidays, everyone!

#'all alone (for the holidays)' #doctor who fanfiction #tegan jovanka #nyssa #nyssa of traken #tegan/nyssa #nyssa/tegan #tegan x nyssa #nyssa x tegan #indestructible #heathrow scientific #tyssa #happy holidays

[rawwkfingers]

Logopolis

One thing I've really come to enjoy from watching Classic is the way its allowed me to recontextualize events in New. This serial singlehandedly made me more on board with both the Flux and the bigeneration and it honestly baffles me that RTD didnt put that connection into The Giggle, even in passing, to help pave the way for his idea

I know WHY he didnt, because he enjoys his happy headcanon that every Doctor got a happy ending. But since thats not in the show and thus not canon (yet) I'm choosing to believe that the bigeneration was a result of time almost eroding in the Flux, akin to the Watcher's presence due to entropy here

To be fair, I'm putting a lot of headcanon of my own here since the Watcher is just not explained. I dont even know if I'd have been able to draw that conclusion if I didnt have the bigeneration as a reference point. I do think this was the writers intentions with the Watcher, just poorly explained like a lot of the science of this serial was

In general, the writing was a little all over the place this serial. Tegan is simultaneously really well written, she has an immediate energy in every scene, while also feeling slapped together. Her total non-reaction to being swept off to a new planet beyond "I'm gonna be late for work" gave me whiplash but her reaction to her aunts death was great (tho that has more to do with Fielding's acting than the writing)

The Logopolis stuff was also poorly explained until we were given a crumb of "they keep the universe together" and the Doctor's decision to fix the chameleon circuit feels like it came out of nowhere

This was not perfect

However, I did like it a lot, mainly because of the various interactions with the Master. His teamup with the Doctor was great, with the Doctor's awareness this is how he dies palpable

And then the juxtaposition of them working together with Nyssa's realization her entire planet is destroyed, because of the Master (who is wearing her father's face!!!) Again, with the context of New Who, it really brings to question just how complicit the Doctor is in all the various war crimes the Master has committed

In a way, this all is a perfect farewell for the Fourth Doctor. His era had some of the strongest writing in the entire series (Ark, Genesis, Pyramids, City) while also some of the worst (Talons, Leisure Hive, Deadly Assassin.) Having a story with confusing lore but strong character work is very fitting

Baker really was great, but there was something about him that always prevented me from LOVING him the way I do Pertwee. Part of that is that I'm not a huge fan of Baker as a person, but I think the other part of that was the way the show moved away from the explicit political stories that I loved so much. I'm sure the worldbuilding stuff that the era was so focused on was fascinating for contemporary viewers, but as a newer fan I either already knew it or it'd been retconned and wasnt enjoyable

His energy was contagious though and I loved the way he brought a levity and joy to the show while also taking the serious scenes with complete seriousness. I remember reading that he agonized over making sure to do Genesis justice because it was such a strong script

His last season started off weak, but ended strong

1. The Keeper of Traken. Just a really, really strong serial on top of introducing Nyssa, who I love and would die for

2. Full Circle. Ever since his introduction where I compared Adric to Atreyu, I've loved the character so of course his first story is this high

3. State of Decay. As much as I love this serial for helping shift the way I view Classic as a whole, its actual plot is fairly standard which prevents it from being higher

4. Logopolis. All the character work is great, all the technobabble isnt

5. Warriors' Gate. I feel like Romana deserved better than the departure she for

6. Meglos. I just find it a little stale and boring, nothing bad but nothing good

7. The Leisure Hive. It was a fun concept but the absolutely horrific editing makes it unwatchable

The companions of this era are all amazing so it'll be hard ranking them but

1. Sarah Jane Smith. There was never going to be any other choice here ofc, she's the face of Classic Who companions for a reason. She steals every scene she's in I love her

2. K9. One of the rare instances where the silly mascot character is truly incredible. Every scene he was in was fantastic and I want one of my own

3. Romana II. Cute and charming snd immensely lovable. Every time she was on screen I wanted more of her

4. Romana I. I loved Mary Tamm's portrayal, she always gave the Doctor as much sass as he gave her and the way she always carried herself as aloof from it all was amazing. But the chemistry of Ward and Baker is unmatched

5. Leela. It pains me SO much putting her this low but she was always the type of character who I loved in spite of her writing rather than because of it. She never had any of the truly GREAT stories the others did

6. Harry. He's the only companion of this era I actively disliked I'm sorry

#rawwk on #classic who watch #logopolis

[wuhwoahhh]

I've been listening to some fun new albums recently Nd I want to write down some of my thoughts :)

The Way - Fastball

This is a great album - it reminds me of fountains of Wayne in the storytelling and the way the music sounds. Track #1 (The Way) has been a favourite for a while, my mum used to play it in the car a lot and it's just such a good song I think based on a true story? Anyways I have been listening to this album in the car and it's just good. Haven't done a super close listen but I like it, late 90s chill indie rock

Set Yourself on Fire - Stars

This album is also very great and I also knew the opening track from my parents playing it. The vocalists voices go really well together, and it documents a breakup or dissolving of relationship between the two - some of the lyrics are a bit cringe or overdramatic but it's real!! like those over the top emotions and thoughts are what comes with a breakup so it works. And it's just very well done, a variety of song speeds and backing instruments. I also listened to Stars - Heart which was their first album, haven't done a close listen but I also really like that one. Sad but pensive and heartfelt indie rock

The Con - Tegan and Sarah

Masterpiece of an album. Honestly no skips, they use repetition so well and it just feels very raw and real. This one is gna be in my listening for a while I can tell

Carrie and Lowell - Sufjan Stevens

Beautifullllll album perfect for sleep and chill and just the right amount of mellow, I was reading outside to this album and it was very blissful. Ive tried Sufjan Stevens other albums but this one is still my favourite. Will have to see if the others grow on me after more listening :)

I'm currently listening to Third Eye Blind - Third Eye Blind and enjoying it a lot! Will probably be going thru more of their discography even though this is their most popular album

I also have been meaning to listen to Joan Jett but I don't think I've been in the right zone, it's been a mellow music summer and then also Hyperpop / club bangers. I wna get into more house music too!!

[nimuetheseawitch]

lol I didn't even realize this bingo post going around was an ask meme until I saw your tag.

You say I love you but I cannot stay and/or The problem with starting halfway through

I'll do both. Why not?

You say I love you but I cannot stay

I love Sometimes You Hear the Bullet. And I was haunted by the idea that Hawkeye would write an introduction to Tommy's book and make sure it got published. And because I'm me, I wanted to write the letters Hawkeye would write. And then I realized BJ would be a complete weirdo about Hawkeye having other friends. Even early on in my hunnihawk days, I was into BJ being really, really weird about it (not that this is hunnihawk - it's just BJ being obsessed with Hawkeye and not understanding boundaries). And BJ *would* be so fucked up about learning how traumatized Hawkeye is/should be, that he would freak out and Hawkeye would have to comfort him. Thinking about this now I almost want to write it again but different.

The problem with starting halfway through

I don't entirely remember where this all started, but I had a lot of feelings. I had already written Hawkeye goes to California, and I was obsessing over every little line where BJ flirts with Hawkeye, and I wanted BJ to think it was a good idea to hook up as the war was ending. This line in particular sunk it's teeth into my brain:

"I know this is an ending and not the start of something, and I wish maybe we could've started something sooner, but I want to know. I want to know what I'm missing"

Specifically because this is a terrible fucking idea and I've been there. But I was also just listening to Tegan and Sara's album Hey, I'm Just Like You, and the song Keep Them Close 'Cause They Will Fuck You Too invaded my brain and combined with my MASH brainrot and the hunnihawk and spewed out this idea of how they could keep fucking up at being together. I needed them to have a really poorly thought out last hookup that ate at BJ until he pursued something more, while Hawkeye convinced himself BJ was happy. And then I needed everyone to be gay and fell in love with gay Peg who gives BJ permission to love Hawkeye but also breaks the fuck out of BJ's heart. And I'm gonna take any chance I get to write love letters and fell hard for the idea of Hawkeye pretending to fish but just reading letters from everyone from the 4077.

Oh, and I was having thoughts and feelings about Hawkeye's inconsistency around messing around with married people.

I also wanted to fix BJ Goes to Maine (which I have a soft spot for, but BJ is too into his family and California to go to Maine, and he'd have to be 100% sure of Hawkeye, which he does not have the confidence for).

I promise I will get back to this series because honestly, I have outlines for several more fics. Even though my brain wants to give them a happy ending, none of the stories I've started give them that (although I have a self-indulgent little Peg/Miriam (my OFC) happily ever after planned because sapphic joy). Just lots and lots of misunderstandings and complication.

In the end, it's a story of two people who have wildly different interpretations of what point of the relationship they're in, and they never really got a start, so how can they have a beginning? And did they start at the end? Keep Them Close 'Cause They Will Fuck You Too is a post-breakup song that I decided to apply to a ship I thought I wanted to give a happy ending, so we'll see what happens.

Caveat to everything I've said here: my memory is shitty, and I probably talked about everything over on discord, but I'd have to track down late night conversations and rants from over a year ago to make sure I got everything.

I enjoyed thinking about this and wow do I wish my wrist wasn't as shitty because I feel like writing things down on paper but it is so fucking annoying to hold a pen with my wrist brace. Maybe I'll type some things. Also, this introspection reminded me how much I like to slowly rotate BJ as I consider what a hot mess he is and how much he can manage to hurt the people around him while he flails figuring himself out.

Thanks @marley--manson, I love answering your questions.

#fic writing bingo

[pod95]

Pairing: Finn Balor X OFC (Ciara)

Word Count: 1310

Warnings: Mature to explicit as the story goes on.

Description: After moving to the USA from England to start her career as an NXT superstar, Ciara gets to meet her long time crush, NXT champion Finn Balor. It's clear the pair have chemistry, but when tensions start to rise, will they find they want more than a no strings attached relationship?

So this is the first piece of fanfic I have written literally ever. I will be posting them here periodically, but I already have 6 chapters out on my Wattpad, AO3 and FanFiction pages.

This series will involve romance, drama and (although it will take a little while) some smutt too. Hope you enjoy it! 😊

Chapter 4: Up Close and Personal

I awoke startled to the sound of my roommate banging on my door. Rubbing the sleep from my eyes I checked the time on my phone, 9:36. Shit! I'd slept through both of my alarms and needed to be at the Performance Center by 10 for my first day. I opened my bedroom door and a panicked Alex was standing on the other side.

"You're gonna be late! Quick, take a shower and I'll drop you off on my way to work." She handed me some towels as I gave her a thankful look before rushing into the bathroom to get ready.

I don't normally sleep in but I didn't get back from the party until late and I definitely went overboard with the alcohol. Fergal and I talked way into the night before sharing a taxi back to our respective homes. Nothing happened obviously, despite my drunken attempts to flirt with him. I cringed at the thought of my clumsy pickup lines and awkward attempts at being alluring. I would have to be very careful around Fergal from now on, after all this was the second time in as many days I was trying to wash away my shame with water and shampoo.

I was washed, dressed and in the car in record time, arriving at the Performance Center a little after 10. Not too bad considering how late I woke up.

"Ciara! Follow me," Paul greeted me as I entered the lobby, "so like I said before, you debut in 3 weeks. You'll be entering into a feud between Tegan and Dakota as Tegans tag partner. Obviously you're very experienced in the ring but here in NXT we have our own rules, own way of doing things so you'll be working with some of our trainers today just to help you adapt."

He led me to a ring, where I was taught the basics of wrestling for the WWE.  There were so many rules, some of which didn't even make sense. Obviously certain moves were banned, no blading, no head shots, all the usuals. But then there was a lot of differences too. Matches often have "agents" that help to set up a match, if you wanted to use certain weapons you need written approval, and don't even get me started on the list of banned words. I was starting to become worried that I was out of my depth here.

After going through the rules and doing some initial training, I was introduced to Steffanie (Tegan Nox), Cheree (Dakota Kai) and Victoria (Raquel Gonzalez)

"Oh hey you're working with us right?" Steffanie asked, extending a friendly hand.

"Yeah! I'm Ciara! Looking forward to working with you all." I introduced myself to the girls and got to know them a little better before getting to work on our tag match

We'd been working for a couple of hours and had some good spots perfected. It was just the finish left to go, where I would hit my finishing move ( a Canadian Destroyer I called the "Natural 20") on Dakota and make the pin.

After practicing it a couple of times, I began to feel like someone was watching me. Glancing around the room, I spotted Fergal, leaning casually against a wall and observing our practicing.

Thankfully for my heart he wasn't shirtless today, in fact he wore a baggy hoodie which concealed his physique like a well hidden secret. I gave him a small smile and turned back to the girls.

"If I might offer some advice..." Fergal interrupted.

"Please." I gestured for him to join us in the ring.

He climbed up onto the apron and jumped over the top rope, clearly showing off.

"Your finisher is a Canadian Destroyer right? It's a good move-"

"Thanks!"

"-But, it's a little overplayed. In WWE alone there's Sin Cara, Adam Cole, Rey Mysterio and Chelsea Green who use it. If you wanna stand out, I'd switch it up a little."

I didn't know how to respond. He was right of course, but I'd always had the same finisher. I didn't want to change it.

"I've always had the same finisher, it means a lot to me. I don't wanna do a different one."

"I'm not saying to do a different one. I'm saying to tweak it a little."

After thinking it over for a few moments, I still didn't have any idea what Fergal was getting at.

"How?" I yielded, knowing that it would result in a cocky smile.

"Have you ever seen anyone do a springboard Canadian destroyer," he smirked.

"I haven't.."

"There's a reason for that. Its not done that often."

He took his hoodie off and threw it into the corner of the ring, revealing a tight vest which hugged his torso.

"Jump at me," Fergal instructed, taking me by surprise slightly. Physical contact with people who are practically strangers wasn't unusual in our line of work, but I still felt nervous at the thought of being that close to him. I did as he told me.

Taking a slight running start, I jumped at Fergal, his strong arms catching me beneath my thighs. As he held me there, explaining the next part of the move to me, two things crossed my mind. The first was that this man was even stronger than I realised. He was holding my full body weight with only his forearms and not even breaking a sweat. The second thought was how close his face was to my chest.

"Right, now I'm gonna bounce your back off the top rope, kinda like a rope assisted powerbomb, only on the rebound, jump over my shoulder into the Canadian Destroyer. OK?"

He spun me around and bounced me off the top rope, but I didn't quite have enough momentum and ended up bashing my chin on his shoulder blade.

"Ahh!" Fergal put me down gently before inspecting my chin.

"Are you OK? Can you move your jaw?" he asked, genuinely concerned.

"I'm fine, don't think it's injured at all, just hurt a bit."

Relieved, he backed off a little, seeming a little guilty that his suggestion had hurt me.

"Shall we try again?" I smiled at him, hoping to reassure him that I was fine and he had nothing to feel bad about.

"OK, but this time you need to really just dive over my shoulder OK? It'll be easier with the girls cause they're smaller."

We went again, and this time I used my full body weight to push myself back off the top rope, Diving elegantly over his shoulder and completing the move. It was a little clunky due to never having done it before, but after a few more attempts, I was able to do it perfectly.

After we'd finished practicing, I collapsed in the ring exhausted. Fergal handed me a bottle of water before sitting cross-legged next to me.

"Good job today. You worked really hard."

"Things are a lot different here in the big leagues huh?" I commented, sitting up and taking a much needed sip of the water. Fergal chuckled.

"You'll get used to it. I can see why Paul likes you."

It was only upon hearing this that something occurred to me.

"Wait, you were here to train too right? Damn, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to talk up all your ti-"

"Dont even worry about it. I came here today to keep an eye on the newbies, " he smiled, reassuringly.

"I know but you could have been helping the others and instead you were stuck with m-"

"Are you hungry?" Fergal interrupted "I'm starving. Come on, I'll treat us to dinner," he stood up, helping me to my feet and leading me out of the training room before I had a chance to refuse, not that I would have done.

#fergal devitt #fergal devitt x reader #finn balor #finn balor fanfiction #finn balor fic #finn balor imagine #finn balor x reader #wwe fanfiction #finn balor x reader smut