#im goong to be honest.

[senseiwu]

The truth about writing spicy things is that most people don’t write them with a straight face. They end up laughing so much

Dhdjdhdjdh okay. That's good to know.

#im goong to be honest. #i have tried. a few times. #never got very far cause it just felt so ridiculous fjdjkdkdkd #asks #and awkward but. mostly silly

[bulkhummus]

wtnv 245 live react

1. I’m predicting some Esteban due to the art for the episode PLEASE mention Esteban

2. Thank god i was worried they forgot he had a kid for a moment there. Cute cute cute cecil wants to put his work in a galllerryyyy supportive dad lets go

3. ABBY MENTION LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOO ABBY LOVE OF MY FUCKING LIFE

3. Carlos thats not FOOD

4. Did you cecil, did you really turn out just fine. By all appearances…….. im obsessed with him

5. Whoa kareem asking about he portal….. i see plot things are developing i see….

6. Im so excited hes talking about a family dinner this is so fucking good for my personally. ABBY REMEMBERING A DRAWING CECIL DID AS A CHILD IM GONNA LOSE MY MINDDDD

7. THIS IS FUCKING EVERYTHING TO ME. CECIL ID HANG YOUR DRAWINGS. IGNORE YOUR MOM. it being similar to estebans…………. HER KEEPING THE DRAWINGS ILL CRY ILL CRY

8. A house next to a tree.. …….. cecil babe that is not watercolors…….

9. Hey hey hey remember when remember when cat ballou ended with a shovel digging up at the base of a tree hey remember the owls

10. oh this episode is everything to me already jesus

11. Oh honey… hes concerned about the art work… i will have much to say about this i just know i will. A parent thinking their childs artwork is perfect and good and great no matter what it is. Abby being the one to say the images look the same afterall….. theres so much to unpack here. This is definitely gonna unpack some cecil childhood trauma

12. stop this is really sad to me :((((( why is he crouched behind the tree i dont like that i dont like that…. HEY DONT GO INTO THE TREE HEY HEY DONT DO IT

13. ;leisfngse;ougnar;ibjaef;viajenv;idjfvnadi;fjvnad;ifvjnad;fovjandf;vojadnfv;aidfjn HEY IM LOSING MY MIND THIS IS CONFIRMING A LOT OF FUCKING THINGS PEOPLE HAVE SPECTULATED ABOUT FOR AGES ABOUT ABBY CECIL AND THEIR MOTHER IN THE WOODS IM GONNA LOSE MY MIND

14. ABBY SO PROMINENT THIS EPISODE LETS GO

15. Oh……………….. dad mention,,,,,,,,,,,, abby sighing…………… oghh this is so good

16. WHERE IS ESTEBAN ILL CRY ONE MILLION YEARS

17. GRANDPA GERSHWIN GRANDPA GEWSHWIN I DREW GRANDPA GERSWHIN I JUST KNEW ESTEBAN WOULD ALSO HAVE VISIONS I JUST FUCKING KNEW IT IN MY HEART AND SOUL

18.abby is abby oh….. this is…….

19. Cecil is so cute

20. Cecil goong through childhood memories while confirming he doesnt know if he and abby like eachother is really sad… until dawn..

21. Salmon and blueberry smoothie i now carlos is a health freak on god

22. CHIN ON HIS SHOULDER.

23. “Oh babe, she did. We stopped scrabble for 30 minutes to hear her story. To be honest I’ve heard her tell it to you so many times now its growing a bit dull…. DO YOU NOT REMEMBER?” Im getting some real man in the tan jacket vibes from this

24. Oh im so sad this is so so so so sad

Okay conclusion:

What a heart breaking episode.

#wtnv #welcome to night vale #wtnv 245

[summitofdreams]

I really wish .y parents would fucking talk to me about money and stop say this it's fine and I need to stop worrying. If everything is fine then why did I overhear you say that theres no money on the debit account so put it on the credit for now? Huh?

#just be honest woth me #ur paying for my college and i really need to know #not telling me is making me so anxious and stressed out like please. i am begging you #be honest so that i know how fucked up it is im goong to college

[anniethecutestbitch]

Kenneth

I’m going to release you now. You’re not healthy for me. You broke me and I deserve better. You know that and I knew but I cjoseto be woth you anyways and I opt to chamge that. I don’t want to be treated like this anymore. I’m not a doormat. I’m not someone you csn just use for sexual pleasure or someone you can just ralk to just because you’re in the army and alone. I’m not an option. You lied to me. You said we’re goong to be together when you get out, you said you’re going to be on hold while you’re out pricessing and can only have your phone on weekends but you lied, you only did that to get away from me. I caught you were online and I tried to reach out then you ignored me. You knew that I am aware now of your lies and you chose not to answer me and ignore me. You chose not to pick up the phone and at least tell me it’s over and you dont want this anymore. Why? I asked you many times if you still want to be with me and you keep on saying yes. I noticed you were careless and could barely talk to me, I thought you were just tired and in a hard situation but you were actually tired of me. You could have just told me, it would hard for me to accept it but it’s better this way than ghosting and ignorning me. I’ve been checking your profile for the past few days and you were online. You didn’t even open my stories or say anything about it. I want to hate ypu, I want to curse you, I want to do black magic on you but I feel like my wffort and the energy I’ll give in isnt worth it anymore. So im releasing you for good. Im releasing you for me to heal and move on to someone better and someone who deserves me. Who deserves love, time and everything. That isn’t you. You broke me instead. You weren’t nice to me. You were toxic. You were abusive and manipulative. I thought it was love but it was my emotions and attachment got me confused. I know now you’re talking to someone else but I hope you’ll be happy with her even though it doesn’t thrills me. I wish you the best. I don’t know know how to handle if you’ll ever text me or even if you dont reach out even this weekend. I’m still waiting for you to reach out this weekend to be honest even though its stupid but still. You’re stupid as well so thats fair. I wonder what lies are you going to say just to explain thinga why you were away and why you were so cold. You gave me an ultimatum that one last fight and it shouldnbe over when you were the one who begged for one more chance. We kept on fighting because of how ypu treated me. You said i like to argue because you gave me something to argue about and you’re the problem. You are the problem. You are a bum. I lowered my standards for you. I know you were tacky and not classy. I still loved you genuinely and I cared for you. I am emotionally invested and I’m still longing for you but this has to stop. I’m not letting you in to my life anymore and ruin it. You’ve done it too many times and it’s time for me to get better, move on and heal. I wish you the best even though sometimes i dont, respectfully. If you’re really ghosting me for good then fine. I’m not bothering you no more anyways. You have no guts if that happens. Tacky. Anyhowww. It’s over, we both know this is dead. Idk if it’s still can be revive but im hoping you’ll fine ways alone to revive if you want to even tho i know you dont want to anymore. Thats fine. I’ll be okay. I’ll get better. I’ll move on and heal and still be beautiful. I’ll grow beautifully andy future is bright. My future has the best for me and I’m allowing it to make it happen even if it’s without you. Lord has prepared aomething big and positive for me and rirst step would be removing you, a blockage to my happiness. I wish you the best. Until then. Good bye.

[pearsalad]

AAAAAAAAAH

#can i tell my roommate about this #debating #i probably cant #bc shes goong to tell me im a stupid dumb pee pee idiot #but i feel like i need more guidance #janie thinks its a good idea #mom will probably think its the only valid idea ive ever had #maleyna may fully rock my shit in. #Which is valid #but like ... i mean this one was my bad skskfjfjf #going to try this thing where im open and honest about important things with peope i care about even tho it feels bad and scary #going to get through yhis #one way or another #personal

[audi-10-blog]

Q&A

When i was a kid, I used to love collecting or recieving blank journal books as gifts- and also buying the cool pens to write in them. Anyone in Welly remember that Morning Glory on Manners Street? They had the coolest coloured pens and types of pens too!

Anyways, one of my favourite things to do was answer questions and also have my friends answer them in my journal. As I've gotten older i think asking yourself questions is such an important part of growth and reflection and it is really interesting to look back on your answers when you go back and read them years later.

I'm gonna get these from Pinterest and every now and then I'm gonna fill these out so I can look back and have a read one day :) rather than writing a daily entry or wtiting about events happening, i think this is an easier way to document my thoughts and moments in my life. let's start one now..

Sunday 5 July 2020

What would you say the best day of your life is so far?

I would say Saturday 17th January 2015...

Zac and I went on our first proper date for my birthday... I went to his house and we both got all dressed up and ready (i am so gutted we didnt take photos that night!!!). I wore a orange/melon coloured crop tank with a tank pencil skirt and tan stilettos. Zac actually spent the whole day shopping in town for a full outfit.. and bought some new shoes and a really nice light blue i love ugly button up shirt.

It was such a lovely night. We had dinner planned and then we were meeting with my friends afterwards to go out to town. This was really special cause it was going to be the first time he was going to meet everyone. He even made the sweet small gestures like opening doors for me.

We went to Matahorn for dinner which he paid for. Then we went to Flying Burito Brothers for a few Margaritas then met with everyone at Southern Cross :)

What was the worse day of your life and why?

Saturday 9th March 2010.. the day my aunty passed away. The day before was also really bad too cause I was really hoping for the best but absolutely preparing for the worse- i remember that day being really stressful. But Saturday, i had no feeling and jusy absolutely empty. It was so wierd and unfamiliar. I've felt heartbreak before and it was beyond that cause it was like i just died inside a bit.

If you could pick a meal for mum to someone to make you right now whay would it be?

I'm living with Zac' parents at the moment and also have not lived at my parents for awhile now so filo food is definitely something i would pick... i would pick Kare Kare

What do you admire the most about your dad?

I would say how when he is into something or involved he puts 100% effort into it. Whether it's coaching or reffing basketball. His career. Or collecting DVDs and magnets. Recently he's been dieting and also helping my mum cook (shes had some problems with her wrists) and doing hello fresh meals and is posting his meals on FB. Even though i do find him nerdly and OTT I admire how he doesnt go into anything with and drops it off halfway, he'll commit

What kind of music really moves you?

Honestly it really depends on the mood im in and i usually notice the music going deep into my sould when im on the bus or train LOL. This one is hard to answer but i like music that have unique beats and rhythms or memorable sounds e.g. Redbone - Childish Gambino or You and Me - Flume. But also music with powerful lyrics and stories.

What things does your sister do that frustrates you or encourages you?

Haha well this is awkward and im not sure if she'll ever read this. But something that frustrates me is around her loyalty. She will choose other people. For example, i had a falling out with a group of friends that she was also part of and i was bullied and phased out and she still remained friends with them and did not even stand up for me. I understood she disagreed on my part but to let people bully me and shut me out really broke me. She also met up with my ex best friends for dinner the other night... which i find wierd. I guess what really frustrating is that she'll probably understand or see how it affects me through my eyes. However, i guess it also taught me to just not give a shit over time and to just do what makes me happy. She gives me tough love and is one of those people that will be 100% honest and tell you things that you need to hear. It is quite sad though what has happened in the last couple of years.

What is something that your brother annoys or helps you?

Well i have two brothers. AJ is nowhere besr annoying as he was when we were kids lol he was a little shit but something that probably annoys me about him is probably the little time he makes to spend time with me- i always have to initiate catching up. However how he has helped me- little things but they matter. Like just being able to call/txt him to ask questions about tech stuff especially. One time i actually got scammed on my laptop and I called him straight away hahahaha fuck and he fixed it for me. He also has been there though when I've really needed him and been someone to cry to and hes been able to put me at ease.

Andrew-the baby. Well he was the cutest thing as a baby and toddler but between the ages of 7-11 i could not stand him.. i dont usually like those age groups in kids anyway. But i think something thay annoys me is his lack of awareness and being a bit more grown up.. i think about when I was his age (13) and i did way more things that him such as chores and goong going out etc. I do have to remember that it's not entirely his fault though..hes the baby and my parents wrapped him in cotton wool and are parents these days just not as loose with their children anymore?! On the flipside though- he makes me feel like i matter. Everytime he sees me, he hugs me and kisses me-even now as a 13 year old! He absolutely loves Zac aswell which is so sweet. He makes me feel so loved and wanted.

What is your dream job?

To be honest, I have a pretty cool job now as an Instructional Design Lead. If i really hated it I wouldnt be working-If i dont like something I always try to move on asap. But, if i could choose/create and money wasn't a factor it would be working with young kids and setting them up with basic life skills such as looking for a new job, preparing for job interviews, budgeting, learning about society and how to vote and also how to live a sustainable life and be waste/plastic free.

I'll leave it there for now. I'll be posting more Q&A as i go/remember lol

[sscottstewart]

7.37am 26 July 2017: “You’re drugs have fucked up your attention to detail” This is a typical statement made by my AVH’s. This may well be true, or may not be, but what I get out of it is that this is just more criticism. 02nd August 2017 2039: ?FM: is anyone getting hurt s: no, not as far as I know FM?: why is this happening s: because for once, and probably the first time, I would not do as you demand PW: you think we don’t exist don’t you s: yes, I think you don’t exist PW: You will find out that we do S: well won’t that

  At approximately 3am on the 13th Sept 2016, Pam was being raped and assaulted, so I drove there at approx 100km per hour in each street and sat out front of her house. Immediately as I turned the engine off, 3 cars arrived.

One pulled into a driveway 35m down the street the house number was 121 or 123 pam’s street (for some reason my note said TA 121/123). I know this because it sat in the driveway for a while, and after I sat for about an hour or an hour and a half, I drove down to get its rego, and it had gone in/up the driveway behind fence gates and parked, so I couldn’t get the rego. I think it was a morone red Corolla hatch.

The car that arrived immediately as I turned my engine off was a white Hyundia hatch/wagon BX66PD. The third car went 120m dfown the street and I couldn’t see it properly

17th August 2018 0057 hours Entered the Muriel St car park of Hornsby Westfield, and there were two vehicles parked in the southern bays opposite Extreme clean. One was a large SUV type white station wagon CHR047, possibly Nissan or Toyota, the other I didn’t see properly, other than it being a two door sporty looking car, white also I think (but am unsure). My suspicion was aroused because they both left the parking bays and exited onto Muriel street as I was collecting my ticket from the machine to enter the car park (going to Hobbysew to collect cigarette buts). The larger white SUV looked similar to a car that boxed me in last Sunday 12th when I was visiting the adult shop to return 2 DVD’s as I stated I was going to (to try and get a result). The driver looked similar as well. Tall in thwe seat, very short balding hair, clean chaven, around 47 – 50 years old.

I have no problem with this if this is the bikies, and caused no problem the previous Sunday. But if I am supposed to behave in a requisite manner, thenI would wish that they don’t leave butt flag me down and say what I am supposed to comply with, or whatever purpose they have in being ahead of me and knowing where and when I will arrive at any particular location.

      from:

Scott Stewart <[email protected]> to: [email protected], Alexandra Tintner <[email protected]>, [email protected], [email protected] date: 19 Jun 2019, 01:46 subject: Times Up – Future Violence In Normanhurst mailed-by: gmail.com

Righty right Boys.

It’s me again – Scott James Stewart – serial number 008, maturbator and schizophrenic.

I’m fucking sick of hearing about you in my mind (through you associate I am led to believe)

IF YOU DON’T SHOW UP AND FUCKING FIGHT,   i’M GOING TO DESTROY YOUR REPUTATION, AND HOPEFULLY SOME OF YOUR FRIENDS.

Unit 5

29 Denman Parade,

Normanhurst, nsw, 2076

Or you can just reply to this email, or better still, if you have any balls at all, call me on

[phone]. But you fucking wont, on the basis of some junkie like excuse.

If you attempt to get me sectioned, I will call the cops, and a few others, and exploit a weakness I have discovered in your organisation. Please check the addresses at the header of this email.

  https://freemason-absolute-leader-declared.webnode.com/ 

http://be-careful-what-you-wish-for.strikingly.com 

Gutless Ghost loving Freemason Cuntrs.

250719 0842

All fm?  On the train going to tafe founfation skills workshop after peoole going on down the rear units and david recording me from outside my door

Scott did u log out No Well what r u goong to do about yr venterlinm paymemts Theres notng i can do Ur wrong I disagree How long will it take to prpve yr right I already jave que a bit of wvidemve to prove im right What do u think of farah I think so highly of her, that i believe yr earlier claims. Out of this world nice What should i do abouf julia Mot what u said u r doing to me. Ask the bandidos. U just lost. M  u did S: well at least ots not for the earleir behaiour error  made Actually  it is Well whata that got to do h farah? J:   Im not daying anymore S: ok . Bet u do Fm: what is going on scott is that garah will mot talk to u anymore S shame Fm: what dou think of that S there can only b 2 reasona for that M: theyr right S > i couldnt hear them? Fm: did u take drugs this morning S unfortunately  yes, i did GMA : wjat do u think about drugs S they destroy lives Fm: female scotty stewart. What did mark kelly think S  i have no idea. (They do!!) Fm: what do u think farah thinks I wouldnt have a clue (they do!!!) Scott – why wont anybody tell i the truth Becaise they camt know id whateber its is the truth. They camt know if its a lie…. wwhatever u r refering to 0906 M: what will happen to farah S   she wiil get eaten M  she already has —– ? Class cleague: do u like me? S i like everyone ? Cc   u wont

ReplyForward

[email protected] bcc:[email protected], [email protected], [email protected] date:3 January 2018 at 21:38

A Humble Request From A Challenged Person

mailed-by:gmail.com

Good evening,

Sorry to bother you. My name is Scott James Stewart, and I you will recall my apologies for contacting previously. As you will recall from some of those emails, I am schizophrenic, and astoundingly, your club has become involved the maintenance of my continued good health .

I have developed a very effective psychosocial treatment of my phenomenological symptoms, that provides me with great relief. It involves quotations (what I call 1st person transcripts), of the Auditory Verbal Hallucinations (AVH’s) I experience irregulalrly, that are a common feature of the condition.

It really is the most amazing thing. All I have to do in order to maintain my good health is when the voices start talking (as they do occasionally) is undertake to write down the time and date, and as much of the exact first person quotations of what I hear as is comfortable, and things improve.

Inexplicably to me, they consistently include your clubs name, and allege to be some of your members who are also Freemasons.

I thought that since I publish this material, it would be ethical, to inform you of the work so that you may respond to the statements and request omissions if you choose.

https://evidenceortruth.wordpress.com/

amazingschizophreniavoices10.wordpress.com

(I am in the process of organising investigative health research in collaboration with Sydney University (Francesca Coniglio) and The Palmerston Clinic (Hornsby Hospital – BGr Dinah Bennet), and will soon be expanding the knowledge of this efficacious treatment approach to other individuals who are subject to AVH’s).

Regards,

Scott”

********************************************************************************************************************************

5) I discovered the hacking of one of the blogs within two hours and so deactivated both before they would have read them, so they also received inactive links as you did.

6) I wrote an brief introduction of my full name name and an ezpression of respect on the Rebels MC 1% Motorcylist Facebook page: (https://www.facebook.com/onepercenterbikers/)

******************************************************************************

(13:56)

My name is Scott James Stewart. I spent at least 13 minutes trying to find a less public way of introducing myself, and I apologise, but this was my result. I am a respectful, and honest individual, who may or may not come to your attention, perhaps again, nd congruent with my integrity efforts, I wanted to introduce myself to your esteemed club (despite the fact that the Police I talk to recommend that I should not do so). Having said this, I offer my introduction to you with special recognition of your affinity with those men whose PTSD you effectively treat through your strong and reliable friendship. Great men in my opinion. Should we ever meet or talk by chance or fate one day, I would be pleased to be able to immediately state, that I introduced myself to you on the 17 January 2018 on a Facebook page (though in gossipy world, others might say 16 January 2018 at approximately 7.30pm. No matter. My respect never changes).

**********************************************************************************************************

6) I have over the past year quite a few hacks on several duplicate blogs publishing the same Auditory Hallucinations statements. I did not even expect anyone would read them. I am compiling some substantiated evidence to facilitate an authoreatitive investigation that can indisputably attribute causality. I should disclose that I have unreliable suspicions of individuals, so maybe that might correlate with anything you discover if you have time to look into any of this. I am not requesting that you do. I am not scared, despite the reputation of the organisations involved. So thank you.

7) I plan to repeat this process of publishing two comparable blogs in the future, but the date of which I am ‘playing by ear’.

8) I need to also add (surprisingly) that my original crime stoppers report was to attempt to get your available resources if possible directed towards the mysterious and carefully checked disappearance of another individual who is featured in the blogs more than anyone. His name is Ron (Ronald) Thiessen, and he deserves the right to oversee the published material,  but he is definately missing, he is famous and I have contacted his famous friends, and volunteer clubs etc, and the material in the blog leads me to  serious concern for his safety because what is in the blog  is damming and defamatory in my opinion. I have talked to your counter staff about him being missing, and read your website, but I cannot meet your seven pieces of documentation necessary to establish a formal missing person report. I can provide you with a document detailing the steps I have taken to locate him, if you are able to look into this. The most important and salient fact of this matter, is his membership of Freemasonry, which coincidentally is what links the two outlaw motorcycle clubs to the blogs, in addition to the members named, and the serious allegations made by my hallucinations against them.

My home phone is 9989 8752

My mobile (which I think has also been hacked) isa currently 0403 996 187 (probably change v. soon – I’ll let you know)

My address is

Gunyah

Unit 5

29 Denman Parade

Normanhurst, 2076.

Thank Gods for the cops

The Police Know 7.37am 26 July 2017: “You’re drugs have fucked up your attention to detail” This is a typical statement made by my AVH’s.