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randomalistic · 5 months

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I just watched Star Wars a new hope for the first-ish time. And . I have a lot of thoughts about the way movies are Preserved and re-presented and how they Interact with society. And this is also just a general review lol

KEEP IN MIND THIS IS COMING FROM SOMEONE WHO NEVER ENGAGED IN STAR WARS MEDIA EVER so I’m very biased towards Not Getting It. I know this is a deeply beloved franchise so I have to. Speak carefully.

Maybe I just had super high expectations due to the Entire Cultural Phenomenon thing. Like who wouldn’t have high expectations this is literally “The Movie of All Time”. It’s kind of unfortunate how much pressure there is on it in that sense.

TLDR: My favorite parts were when r2d2 screamed like WRREEOOOWWWWWW !!!!!!!!!

ANYWAYS. My opinion (uh oh)

The sets and the effects were OUTSTANDING. As expected. I just wanted a little more main character depth but I suppose that’s what sequels are for

I had fun watching it the special effects and all the weird creatures and robots were my ultra favorite part but…….. UM) the pacing was weird and there wasn't enough tension. Was that just me ? Maybe I was just tired . But .. idk man…

Actually no I can forgive first installments for being a little shaky and awkward. This was literally made like 45 years ago. Like there weren’t a lot of insane movies like this back then so this is kinda just what you got.

But yeah some character depth was left to be desired. Some characters were a little too cold and emotionless like Luke's HOME was destroyed and his Aunt and Uncle were INCINERATED TO SMOKING SKELETONS & he had almost no reaction. Like can the characters be a little traumatized please . nobody cried in this movie. I know they're going through a space war so maybe Leia is a little more cold and callused. But Luke?? Luke is just a kid… even if he didn’t care about his aunt and uncle That much, he should have had a stronger reaction.

I completely get that this was 1977 and there was probably a lot of stigma for a protagonist male character expressing that amount of vulnerability and grief in a MOVIE. That would have been unheard of. At least I assume so.

But it’s such a shame because Luke is the person we’re viewing this movie through he’s like the audience stand in. And unfortunately when he doesn’t care/show emotion, I also find it more difficult to care and get invested. Not that I DIDNT care. It just made me take it less seriously and affected tension. That combined with the funky pacing also affected the tension poorly… so I was finding it hard to stay engaged. aside from seeing the silly creatures every once in a while. But maybe that’s also because my dog kept interrupting me lol. Again ☹️ this movie was meant to be watched in a huge theater… 40 years ago.. maybe it just doesn’t translate ?

I was also not a fan of leia and Luke becoming instant love interests like. how did that even happen they just met. have they had a single conversation. AGAIN it’s just because it’s an old movie I should cut it some slack. But it just left a lot to be desired. I think that’s because what I care about in movies the most is the characters and their personalities.

I think this movie was definitely more of a “this is a technological marvel with an amazing score and incredible sci-fi action!!” And less of a “this is a movie showcasing AMAZING and COMPLEX CHARACTERS” the human characters are pretty basic im sorry to say. But like. how can I criticize that when this was like the first movie to make those character types basic

Maybe it’s because living in a hugely inspired-by-Star-Wars-world it’s just gotten so.. old? Exhausting maybe? Western society expects that you’ve seen Star Wars. “You haven’t seen Star Wars?? Are you kidding!! It’s a classic!!” Maybe I’ve just seen these tropes so many times I’m unable to properly appreciate the sheer creativity and groundbreaking nature of the original. Which if that’s true, is genuinely unfortunate. I wish this film could properly translate itself to newer generations but you would have to consume it in a vacuum I swear. Which is weird. Because a movie with similar cultural impact like the Matrix still had me engaged when I saw it. I DONT KNOW MAN. THIS MIGHT JUST BE A ME PROBLEM.

I’m just saying its popularity lessens the impact of the franchise and changes the viewing experience a lot.. especially with the longer you wait to watch it. Which wasn’t a problem for the people watching it in the theater for the first time!! Of course it was magical and unlike anything people had ever seen before!! In that era It hadn’t become obnoxiously popular yet (I mean this in the nicest way possible.)

Anyways. Characters I did like. R2D2 was cute and him and c3po had divorced couple energy. I think their scenes were my favorite. It’s a big scary world out their for a couple of silly gay droids. I mean what.

Han solo was kind of a lovable asshole until he decided to be a mysoginist.. 💔I am used to taking old movies with a grain of salt but should I really have to tolerate that kind of stuff. SORRY ITS AN OLD AND VERY ICONIC MOVIE . I NEED TO GIVE IT A MASSIVE GRAIN OF SALT. But yeah Leia is the only female character besides Luke’s aunt. It was 1977. At least they made her badass and shoot things yaaay

(Unfortunately I watched it on a stretched out DVD version but this gif looks like better quality lmao. AGAIN… LOSING THE ARTIST INTENTION BY WATCHING ON A DVD💔 it’s so sad man.)

OK FINALLY SOMETHING ELSE I LIKED. (Everything I don’t complain about you have to assume I Enjoyed okay. I just don’t have much to say about those things lmfao) but yes I liked Obi Wan and Luke’s mentor-student(?) relationship it was very sweet. I liked their interactions!

It’s kind of funny he cared more about Obi-Wan dying more than his house and family LOL. BUT THAT SAYS SOMETHING!!! THAT REALLY SAYS SOMETHING. IT SHOWS HE CARED. HE SCREAMED “NO!!!!” WHEN HE SAW IT HAPPEN. And he felt awful afterwards and Leia comforted him, IF ONLY FOR A BRIEF MOMENT before flying around and having fun again. But that was THERE!! and that was real character depth okay.

I SWEAR I ENJOYED IT. I WILL PROBABLY WATCH EMPIRE STRIKES BACK JUST TO SEE IF IT IMPROVES BC IVE HEARD THATS THE BEST ONE. but yeah. silly and cheesy sci fi adventure with tons of creatures of COURSE I liked it. It’s an AMAZING MOVIE and it’s ONE OF THE MOST INFLUENTIAL MOVIES IN ALL OF HUMAN HISTORY. But that means IT SUFFERS. It suffers because of Society. I’m the joker now and here’s my Star Wars unpopular opinion. I didn’t expect anybody to read that far. Thanks.

BUT I HAVE. one last bitchy complaint. I know the opening scrolling text is the most iconic movie thing on earth and I should Appreciate that. but TALK ABOUT INACCESSIBLE LOL I COULD BARELY READ THAT SHIT. IT FELT LIKE I WAS WATCHING WINDOWS MOVIE MAKER. THE SLANT MADE IT SO HARD TO READ. You could only read the full sentence when it’s like in the Middle of the screen and by then it’s already shrinking and scrolling AWAYYYYY!!! GHAAHA it’s so bad. (affectionate) but I think it’s charming how Bad the opening scroll objectively is and yet it’s still so beloved and iconic. (I promise I mean well.)

Ok on second thought maybe it was the DVD that messed it up even more. Sigh. Because this looks perfectly fine. THATS SO UNFORTUNATE THAT SOMEONES MOVIE EXPERIENCE CAN BE COMPLETELY DIFFERENT DEPENDING ON IF ITS WATCHED ON A DVD OR IN A THEATER OR ALONE OR WITH OTHERS AND THERES SO MANY FACTORS UGH!!! This cannot continue.

#IM SORRY.#film #film review #txt #long post #I hate on movies because i care about them deeply.#AND I LIKED THIS MOVIE!!!!!#movie #I love writing my thoughts down for each movie I watch. my reviews are getting longer.

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spacesparkledust · 4 years

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sometimes as you grow older you start to experience certain feelings and I just want to assure you that its perfectly normal and I too for some inexplicable reason feel my blood boil when I hear someone say “Baby Yoda”

#im sorry but the world didnt score on creativity #its just so fucking lame #Tis baby and looks like yoda #How would you feel if i called you Baby Human all the time

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lilacborrower · 3 years

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heres a bunch of headcanons for the niche dance mfa au that i have 1.5k of disjointed thoughts about and will probably never finish. dance research is fascinating! highly recommend going down a wikipedia rabbithole or looking into dance journals!

under the cut bc this got v v long

dex is a Big Ass nerd about choreology.

“what is choreology” u know how music has a notation system? so u can look at the score and learn the piece from it? choreology is that but for dance. labanotation/laban movement analysis and benesh notations are some big ones.

during undergrad he went thru a lot of character development and realized that Ballet Is Not The Foundation of All Dance and learned that most prominent figures in modern dance were Very Bad People.

his research is in responsible/ethical use of eurocentric theories created by Very Bad People with Very Bad Ideas ingrained in them. specifically labanotation. because rudolf laban uhhhh really sucked but labanotation is incredibly useful.

went to like. uiowa for his undergrad. a school with a dance program but not a Dance School

yes he is a certified labanotator

please talk to me about choreology it is so cool

nursey and contact improv

NURSEY AND CONTACT IMPROV

his thesis work is specifically site specific contact improv (hi leaf piles)

florida state. “wait hey i didnt know fsu had a dance program” correct! florida state has a dance CONSERVATORY. how do i know this? i googled “expensive dance conservatories us”.

gets in lots of fights w dex abt a) BA vs BFA and regular programs vs conservatories and b) “how the fuck is improvisation a thesis, nurse. no. listen. no--LISTEN--it’s not a piece, it changes every time--”

he has every single issue of contact quarterly

chowder

ok im torn here

either dance as a means of conflict resolution

or like. making shit inspired by aquatic creatures

usc glorya kaufman school of dance

or maybe alonzo king LINES training program?

ballet background it suits him idk

resolving conflict in an embodied way has like. so much potential.

bunhead ransom

“im still thinking we could make a piece out of this”

ballet

BALLET

ballet and biomechanics/kinesiology and figuring out how to most efficiently/safely do ballet things

“no no don’t do that stretch it puts too much pressure on the hip capsule try this stretch for your psoas instead”

he danced with The Royal Ballet before he retired and decided to go back to school

undiagnosed test anxiety also applies to “stage fright”

and thesis reviews

cultivating a healthy mental and physical relationship with ballet!! his minors ballet class is the best bc it instills 0 baggage in his students

holster

i know the film minor is fanon but this boy loves the tech side of dance

projections! motion capture! fancy shit like that!

helps ransom w his thesis by sticking him in motion capture gear to figure out what exactly his body is doing

his undergrad was a film degree im sorry

jack

high school was the School of American Ballet

and then he burned out before he was picked to join the company

and then he got his bachelors in history!

and now hes studying vernacular dance & national identity in wwii

has Opinions on george balanchine

bitty

eating disorders in the dance world

also pie

somehow hes getting his MFA in dance with a concentration in pie

aerial silks background

someone please draw this boy doing silks

bonds w jack over george balanchine Opinions

lardo

if shes writing the grant.......shes getting the grant

unmatched grantwriting skills

she WILL get the funding for your project

anyway shes focusing on dance management

shitty

the effects of psychedelics on performance and creative process

with a side of

how do the performing bodies change the interpretation of the work bc everything outside of the skinny white ballerina carries a Political Weight whether we like it or not so how do we combat that and change that

but like. in conjunction with getting high.

because its shitty

#omgcp #omg check please #everyone please read An Anthropologist Looks at Ballet as a Form of Ethnic Dance #by Joann Kealiinohomoku

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survivorreelsmagicwithin · 4 years

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Episode 6- “No matter what I throw to the wall, it won’t erase whatever writing is currently there”-Nick

SOMEHOW. .. I escaped rocks! and the whole hufflepuff alliance did too! I'm really sad about Jess going because I ADORE her but... ugh. Part of me is very glad that Owen is still in the game because I feel like maybe I can salvage my relationship I had with him and we can sneakily work together without the rest of my alliance getting wind of it. I just hope that hufflepuff doesn't have to worry about going to tribal again anytime until the merge. That was... WOW.

I have crazy news all you cool cat and kittens! https://media.giphy.com/media/RGixkYkOKdWATSReHt/giphy.gif

Tribal happened and instead of it being between me and Max as I had anticipated the Hufflepuffs voted for Owen. That's... a twist!! Anyway, since they are a bunch of phonies who lie I stuck my vote against Max and everyone else stuck with theirs letting rocks decide

https://media1.tenor.com/images/422ca011d526025e11c9eaf90a3edf59/tenor.gif?itemid=11361132

This is kinda funny since we were joking about letting fate decide the vote prior to the crazy round. Also, I think Jess scored the lowest on the immunity challenge so it's like we voted off our weak link even though she didn't even do that much worse and it's a terrible way to look at things since she was such a good ally. Anyway, hoping immunity is something that we can win so that we don't suffer another tribal council because I'm pretty confident that they won't take a swing at Owen again just yet.

I LOVE how my business is getting spread from person to person LOL. This is like the game of telephone that just keeps going. I WAS MAD AT OWEN FOR TELLING PEOPLE I WAS IN AN ALLIANCE! WHICH I SHOULDN'T HAVE TOLD HIM ABOUT IN THE FIRST PLACE. somehow it has now gotten turned to me telling owen how i felt about max LOL. Yes, I did tell Owen that i usually just talk to max in the OG Hufflepuff chat but NO THAT DOES NOT MEAN I WANT TO KEEP OUTING MY ALLIANCE TO EVERYONE IN THE WORLD now chips is wanting tea and i gave him some but i'm trying to without admitting the hufflepuff alliance chat that everyone already knows about now anyway. WHY IS MY DRAMA THE CENTER OF ATTENTION ON THIS TRIBE CAN'T SOMEONE ELSE RUN THEIR MOUTH NOW SO PEOPLE CAN TURN THEIR ATTENTION TO SOMEONE NEW??? but okay I think Owen and I are good now but I still trust Lily above EVERYONE else in this game.

Hm... so Landen told me that he was planning on giving more information before the revote and the rock draw.. but unfortunately he wasn't there to share. I find out that Owen already communicated to him that Max and myself are the expendable bottom two of our tribe and that just kinda... syncs up with what I said earlier about Owen. Here I was thinking we had turned over a leaf. I'm going to give him another chance with me. And not judge him based on what somebody else said (and could have been lying about) that he said. But if the shoe fits. https://media1.tenor.com/images/a19f8b641e24d8c212ba0b3913af45ca/tenor.gif?itemid=11553933

THIS IS MY CONFESSIONAL FOR LAST ROUND DONT GIVE ME A STRIKE PLZZZZZ ok really quickly basically the last vote was on raffy bc he tried to get the vote on jacob or jules (not me thank goodness) and he blew up his own game, i have 3 alliances one with joanna nick and jacob and one with joanna dan and jules and then my core alliance with jules and jacob, raffy was kinda the outlier for my own game because i had an alliance with everyone else and then i clicked well with autumn so i wanted it to be raffy and it kinda just came up that way organically and he did himself no favors. I kinda pitched to autumn how after this we're the sole people from our og tribes and we should stick together because if we lose again i kinda wanna vote out dan bc he has an idol and an undisclosed advantage ON TOP OF THAT so he is really dangerous and he thinks jules trusts him but me and jules are each others number 1s (i hope at least) and they are telling me everything, in a perfect world me jules jacob and autumn vote dan if we lose to avoid nick slipping anything and joanna from having an emotional time with it since she struggled with just voting dan out, its a big move but i think it needs to happen, it's also the best cast for me personally bc i have the weakest individual connection to dan whereas with joanna and autumn i feel really strongly with and like i can work with them, nick is also there but he doesnt pose much of a threat and i think with jacob still being in the game he will trust me or jacob the most and we can use that as a number. Anyways we ended up winning this challenge anyways so it didnt matter but heres to hoping we win again bc while i would be ok with dan going if we can win immunity thats priority, so heres to hoping we can do that

3 minutes later

OK THIS IS MY CONFESSIONAL FOR THIS ROUND RIP JESS !!!!!!!!!! I AM SO SAD JESS IS GONE I LOVE HER WITH MY ENTIRE BEING SHE IS SO FUN AND SO GOOD AND I WANTED TO PLAY WITH HER BUT SURVIVOR GODS SAID NOPE I AM REALLY SAD. i am so sad. but the game moves on, with jess leaving nick really has no one besides me and jacob and maybe joanna? but she is more loyal to her og ravenclaws, so im hoping he sticks to my side, autumn and i are clicking well but shes just likable so shes clicking with everyone, i hope we can get closer in the game as well bc i wanna work with her, dan scares me alot, if we lose again i might try to blindside him with jules but idk, its all up in the air, challenge is music videos, im not particularly fond of this challenge or any judgement based challenge for that matter but i am rolling with it, it's usually fun i guess, but im awkward so eek, idk my tribe doesn't seem like the type to stand out in a music video but maybe they will all surprise me and turn it out, heres to hoping that happens! ok bye for now!

I’m probably being super sensitive rn but I really don’t like Joanna. Like at all. If it’s not her idea, she doesn’t want to do it. Like she’s so demanding and annoying and I feel like it’s probably just the game getting to her but I really don’t like it

So after my last confessional, what happened was I went to Ruthie to double check whether the information I was getting was true and she did want to vote for Max. i made sure to cover my bases discussing this with Lily and also telling Ruthie I'm totally down to vote Max if she is, i want to make myself as trustworthy as possible to her and start working with her more down the line, it's key moments like these where establishing trust is VITAL! with her being pissed that owen spread the information and wanting to vote hufflepuff strong though, it was the perfect time for us to try to make a move on owen. I was really confident I could flip Juls and Chips on the revote, and the truth is if I hadn't NAPPED THROUGH TRIBAL.. LMAO... I most likely could have. But it all worked out in the end since we deadlocked and Jess went home in the rocks. I love Jess and was really excited to work with her, but it's very obvious I wasn't a priority to her, and her going home leaves 4 Hufflepuffs on this tribe, so I'm okay with the results. I did my best afterward and will continue to work hard on damage control with Owen, Juls, and Chips. I went from perhaps one of the upcoming boots to a higher up social center on this tribe and I'm hoping that goes mostly unnoticed? But who knows. That's why we gotta win this challenge! Speaking of, it's a music video challenge! Yay I'm so happy I got to do one of these sooner rather than later :D I've had a blast coordinating the challenge with Lily. We work really well together and I feel it extends to challenges, but also our casual conversation, and just the fact that we get along so well, she is pretty much my tightest person in the game right now and I think that we can do a lot of damage as a long term duo (especially with an alliance with Ruthie, Max as an additional number to that, and us being Positioned in the middle tier of the Huffs.) I'm well aware how likable Lily is though so I'll keep that in mind before I promise ride or die loyalty forever, but for right now I'm very happy working with her. I'm STILL not going to look for any spells, sorry bout it. but yyyeaah... Overall I'm pretty satisfied with the MarshmallowMoves I've been making and im looking forward to what happens next in this crazy game.

Our music video is........ gonna lose lmao. It’s no shade at Joanna bc fuck editing. But it’s soooooooooooooo boring. I feel like the judges will watch like 30 seconds and fall asleep. It’s a cute song choice and everything, but it’s also....... so bland. The Harry Potter puppet pals would have been so good and I stand by it.

I'm literally SO HAPPY!!! Hufflepuff won a creative challenge that I did a lot of work directing on (HUGE props to Lily who I love and was amazing to work with on this), and some of my ideas got mentioned in the comments as good things!! I'm honestly just ecstatic about the way this whole challenge went down, it was so much fun. Juls did an amazing job editing, the filming everyone else did was fantastic, I'm just in love with this tribe and I'm so happy with the music video we did. Not only that, but I wasn't feeling too hot about tribal council. It's not that I thought I'd be going home, but I thought the vote would be very difficult. It most likely would have had to fall on Chips or Owen - if it had been Chips, that would be really tough and could even result in some spell plays being cast against us, with the vote being probably 4-3 since Juls/Chips are close. If it had been OWEN though, Juls and Chips maybe would've voted with us, but Ruthie probably would've not wanted to go for him now that they've had a chance to talk it out since she admitted to their old Final 2. Luckily Ruthie and I were able to now agree on an official alliance between us and Ruthie, so it looks like we've got a lot to do together and I'm excited to see what the future holds. I've been trying to damage control a bit with Chips and Owen, I'm not sure how well it's working. Owen is a very naturally social person and I feel that he is quite good at deceiving his true feelings and emotions, either that or he is very rational and calm about the game, not upset he VERY nearly got blindsided - either way, he's super dangerous and I can't just trust that we had a nice conversation one time, it'd be dumb of me. I'm feeling positive about where I stand with this tribe right now though, I don't think anyone would be able to get a strong majority to target me because I really don't think Juls, Max, Ruthie, or Lily would want to vote me out. At least I sure hope not! No, but, a lot of times with creative challenges in these games I struggle because I am pursuing creative passions in real life, so even though it's just a few judges, it can feel defeating when you get judged bad and harsh critique. I take those criticisms into account but it can still make you feel a little self conscious at times. Winning this challenge was a huge boost and just something that made me feel good, not to mention the fun times I had doing it with everyone on the team. Overall - a GOOD DAY! One could even say.. "A sunny day!" (one of my lines in the music video DUH) Hopefully Kev doesn't go out, curious to see where this game goes next. Adios~

So thankful that we won! Although I feel like I need to deal with the madness that was the last tribal but if I’m being honest I’m just not ready. Last tribal was so beyond crazy but I know that’s part of the reason why I play. I didn’t play this game to play it safe. I’d rather mess my game up trying to make a move then sitting in the sand and letting others dictate what happens on a vote. Although in the end...rocks made the call. I really miss Jess and her company on the tribe. It sucks when someone leaves that you get along well with and I could see the potential of us working together in the future. Jess is a strong player and made it through so much already in this season. Seeing her go def has a huge impact on the rest of the game that’s for sure. I appreciate how Jess stuck to her guns too which I completely understand. With her going it shows me that I really need to prove myself and continue to be as bold as I can be without getting caught that is. I haven’t talked to Owen since we tried voting him out. He knows what happened. I know what happened. It’s awkward but I’m glad that we could all still have fun with the music video challenge. Landen and I did a lot of the planning and Juls did the editing. And everyone put in their input on ideas and sending in quality magic videos. I’m glad we turned out with something cute and fun. I wanted to suggest a tiger king song in Jess’s honor but wasn’t sure if the judges would appreciate it in the same way. Wondering what’s going to happen in this game. Ruthie and I have been working together in the castle to find an idol. So far no luck and I assume at this point in the game anything and everything would have been found by now. But who knows. We shouldn’t give up that’s for sure. Even though last tribal was incredibly difficult and hard and I’m not sure if I even handled it the best way I could, I’m still having fun playing this game and glad to be here. Hoping merge is around the corner even though I’m not ready for the craziness that comes with it.

Y’all this vote is stupid af haha. THE LADIES ARE FIGHTING! And by ladies I mean Autumn and Nick. They both want each other dead, and Joanna wants Jacob dead lmao. Me and Kevin are legit sitting here like 🥴

last round.. mess. this round.. thank god we won LMAOOO. i honestly don’t know what all to say because i’m starting to question where everyone stands with me, BUT. i think i’ll be fine.. hopefully. unless people keep lying to me, that’s when i’m como se dice.. fucked <3

okay lemme scream in my dr real quick....jacob's ass DIDNT DO SHIT IN THE CHALLENGE BC HES IN 7 FUCKING ORGS BUT IF I VOTE HIM OUT AGAIN I HURT HIS FEELINGS??? he's also a loyal ally to me (at least, loyal enough) but he wants to keep NICK in who?? literally is gunning for me?? dude you put urself in this position not doing the challenge and it makes me so angry that i have to cover for him and cover his ass!! when he didnt do shit!! and i honestly think he's !!!! good enough to vote out at this point!!! especially bc mister dan thinks i know jacob IN REAL LIFE??? IM SICK IM SICK IM SICK IM SICK !!!!!!!! JACOB SHOULD'VE TRIED IN THE CHALLENGE!!! HE GOT HIMSELF INTO THIS MESS!!!

Good news! I mean, it's kind of good news. We had a music video challenge and we picked a fun song. We did Magic by Selena Gomez sung for The Wizards of Waverly Place movie! So that was a lot of fun... and I suggested to our tribe we have some sort of "story" and aren't just lip syncing because I have had too many lost lip syncs where we lost because of no story being evident. So we did a "getting into Hogwarts" and being Hufflepuffs and it was cute! And fun!! I'm pretty sure if we lost I would be the vote off since they think Owen has an idol so they would vote me out since Landen has a close relationship to Juls and so I'm the next most obvious choice. Anyway! Our story carried us to the win!!! I believe this might be the first time across all ORGs that I've won a lip sync comp. That might be a lie, but I have a pretty bad track record.

ooooooh if this tribe don't make a damn DECISION! https://media.tenor.com/images/4ff794852927c7441b26618a705b340f/tenor.gif The vote has been me, Jules, Jacob, Nicholas, God, Trump- you name it. Particularly because Nicholas refuses to just sit down and eat his food. Like everyone was just gonna vote Jacob and then Nicholas had to start throwing names out, starting with me of course, so I've literally been whipping the vote all day. And just when I got a majority on Nicholas, now he's making a group chat with Joanna, Dan, and Kevin (aka all the white people lmao) to inform them that he's now ready to vote Jacob???

https://giphy.com/gifs/bad-girls-club-bgc-rocky-8Cprh3gaXGGQw

Where was that energy at like 2:00? And why am I always saying that about Slytherin? They're nocturnal I swear to God and they don't give a fuck until the sun goes down because otherwise make it make sense. Why take us all through changes for 5 hours if you're actually down to vote your brother out? Like we have lives- make a decision and stick to it. And then all that back and forth is just showing your ass?? So now EVERYONE knows who you want out and just how indecisive you are. And tbh sending him out would do him a favor because how are you gonna come back from exposing your entire hand. I honestly want us to go back to tribal after this just so I get another shot at him before merge. Cause if he mobs up with Hufflepuff at merge it's a wrap for me. But! today we learned who's really with who and that shit is KEY: Jacob and Joanna got beef, Nick apparently has beef with me and Jules, Nick has Joanna and thinks he has Dan but doesn't, Kevin and I are solid, Dan and I are officially made a deal, and I think Jules thinks Ravenclaw is solid buuuut that ain't true lmao. But like it's fine Basically all's well that ends well, a Slytherin boy will go home and I have no clue which but I don't care at this point because enough is enough, and I'm going back to watching How to Get Away with Murder. So call me when y'all ready for me to vote https://66.media.tumblr.com/a6fc82d986adfcc112785f209fe163bd/tumblr_inline_ngmjfrxq071sggcf2.gif

WITH GOD AS MY WITNESS JOANNA IS RIGHT!!!!! SHE'S RIGHT!!!!!

Long story short, I hate everyone here. Everyone is running around acting a fool about who to vote and frankly i don't even care who goes. my worry is that joanna knows about my steal a vote and I don't want her to fucking leak that shit around if I vote out nick, but at the same time I don't trust jacob because he's legit never online!! maybe i'll just tell joanna right before the vote that kevin told me he was voting nick so I flipped??? i'm so stressed.

okay. im fine now. ITS FINE!!!! I LOVE YOU JACOB !!!! IF UR READING THIS I LOVE U BITCH!!!! AINT NEVER GONNA STOP LOVIN U BITCH!!!!! EVEN WHEN U MAKE GAMES HARD!!!!!!!

This round has been a whirlwind. I feel I’m losing the morals I entered the game with, because I’m possibly having to sacrifice my final slytherin teammate to stay in the game. I thought I had a grasp on this tribe, but I genuinely feel so lost. It’s exhausting, and I’ve been fighting back tears of exhaustion and defeat the entire day. I trust Joanna and Kevin with all my heart, but I secretly fear Joanna is just pocketing me as a number. Personally, I think we are great friends, but gameplay-wise, I do think she’s trying to gain me as a workable number. More power to her. I did not even suggest Autumn, I merely asked if that’s who is being considered since she’s one of the people, to my limited knowledge, that was outside the brewing majority alliance. I suppose it was leaked to her, meaning that I got blamed for a crime I did not commit. I tried fixing it with Autumn and Jules, but I’m unsure of my success. I believe Jacob will leave tonight, but I fear it’s my time. I’ve tried so hard, I just hate it. I applied to this game as a Ravenclaw, but I was placed on Slytherin. I’ve went to every tribal but one, but the one I did not go to resulted in one of my two allies leaving. Speaking of that, I’m thankful that Jess and I worked things out, genuinely. I just want to stay and fight, but I feel the spotlight is fading. No one is receptive, and no matter what I throw to the wall, it won’t erase whatever writing is currently there. ~ nick.

THIS IS AN AUTUMN APPRECIATION POST. I REPEAT. THIS IS AN AUTUMN APPRECIATION POST. PLS KNOW I LOVE YOU!!!!!!! POINT BLANK PERIOD!!!

Me almost forgetting to make one of these! I LOVE that we won another challenge and I really feel like something is about to happen to shake up the game, maybe a swap and one person is isolated for a bit or... merge? Okay sending this in before it’s late and I get a strike hehe.

https://youtu.be/8omy0AqZ5cc

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sparklesandstarsandstuff · 7 years

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✉ & $ %

Mabel doesn’t respond for fifty years but complains that no one texts her||ACCEPTING

a text that WASN’T SENT. [text: Dipshit] One of these fucking days I’m gonna do something so creatively advanced that people will finally get off my ass about how smart you are. I couldn’t even get a congrats on my ACT score, early admissions, and scholarship offer because you had already gotten those two years ahead of time....

a LOVING text. [text: Dipshit] `One of these days you’re gonna do something so ingenious and wonderful you won’t have to worry about anything. I guarantee it. My twin senses tingle about it. And I’m gonna be there with you every step of the way because I love you and we made a promise to face this world together.

an ACCIDENTAL text. [text: Dipshit] someBODY ONCE TOLD ME THE WORLD WAS GONNA ROLL ME I AINT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED SHE WAS LOOKING KINDA DUMB WITH HER FINGER AND HER THUMB IN THE SHAPE OF AN L ON HER FOREHEAD WELL THE YEARS START COMING AND THEY DONT STOP COMING AND THEY DON’T STOP COMING AND THEY DON’T STO

[text: Diptshit] SHIT SORRY I TEXT MEMES WHEN IM STRESSED I DIDNT MEAN TO SEND THAT.

a CURIOUS text. [text: Dipshit] Do you think that if I start painting a wall in the basement without asking Ford, will he let me keep doing it? Will he let me just kinda go until I’ve painted the whole thing? Or is my unwarranted presence in there forbidden?

#tiitaniumxwill #;;ic #;;student loans can suck my ass

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trendingnewsb · 6 years

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‘You’ll never work again’: women tell how sexual harassment broke their careers

Actors, writers, assistants, comedians and journalists speak out about the toll that sexual assault and harassment in the workplace took on their futures

As women come forward with accusations of sexual harassment in politics, media, entertainment and other fields, following the flood of allegations against Hollywood producer Harvey Weinstein, it is striking how many of their stories share the same ending.

Either the alleged abuse, the victims refusal to stay quiet, or both, slams the door on critical job opportunities and puts a serious sometimes terminal dent in her career. In some cases the victim never works in her industry again.

We spoke to a number of women who have come forward about the costs that sexual harassment imposed on their futures and careers. As society debates what sort of consequences should befall their alleged abusers, it is clear that these women have already suffered a penalty.

There are coming to be consequences for those actions, but its too little too late, said one of the women, former DC Comics editor Janelle Asselin. For the people who were harassed and assaulted, the consequences are something weve been living with for years.

The comic-book editor

The longer I read comics, the more I feel the possibilities are limitless, said Asselin, reflecting on her time as an editor at the publishing powerhouse behind Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman and big-budget superhero movies such as the current Justice League.

If youre at DC, youre at the pinnacle of comics, Asselin said. You feel like youve made it into this amazing club where only an elite few get to work. It was a dream come true.

Asselin rose to be the associate editor of one of DCs most treasured properties the Batman comics. From her perch, she shepherded one of DCs first bisexual characters, Starling, into existence and put the brakes on sexist plot devices.

There was a storyline in a Robin comic where the writer wanted the female villain to be tricked by chocolate. Because shes a woman, Asselin recalled with a laugh. It was her first time objecting to a major storyline, and she won.

At DC, Janelle Asselin rose to become the associate editor of the Batman comics, but later quit after reporting a male editors sexual comments. Photograph: Janelle Asselin

But her time with DC would be short-lived. After she and a number of women reported Eddie Berganza, one of the companys most esteemed editors, to HR for making sexual comments in 2010, Berganza received a promotion.

Asselin quit.

Berganza, who has fired earlier this month following a BuzzFeed report about the allegations against him, has not publicly responded to the accusations and did not return a request for comment from the Guardian, nor did DC.

Earlier this month, Asselin tweeted: I loved my job at DC until that year that things went south. I never wouldve left if it hadnt been for DCs lack of respect for the women who came forward. My career and life could be very different if Eddie Berganza hadnt been what he was.

I underestimated what the psychological impact of reporting him and watching DC promote him anyway would be, Asselin told the Guardian. By the end, I hated going to work, because I had a very negative view about the company and their priorities.

Asselin took a new position with Disney but was later laid off. Working as a comics journalist and starting an independent publishing company gave her some satisfaction, but ultimately, she burned out. Today, Asselin is a claims adjustor for a workers compensation insurer.

My career was forever impacted by this, she said. Its hard to know what would have happened if they had done something But I feel like a lot of the women who left would have still been there.

The TV writer

Kater Gordons career reached a peak many writers only dream of in fall 2009, when she shared an Emmy as a writer on the second season of Mad Men.

She hasnt worked in television since.

The reason, she recently told the Information, is that the shows creator, Matthew Weiner, sexually harassed her. The incident robbed her of all her confidence and placed her in a lose-lose situation: She felt it could end her career if she challenged him, but she didnt feel like she could continue to work with him if she didnt.

Weiner denies he harassed her. After leaving the Mad Men writers room, Gordons attempts to stay in television were dogged by tabloid rumors that she and Weiner were in a relationship.

I had the Emmy, but instead of being able to use that as a launch pad for the rest of my career, it became an anchor because I felt I had to answer to speculative stories in the press, she said. I eventually walked away instead of fighting back.

Kater Gordon after the 2009 Emmy Awards in Los Angeles. We are all paying a cost for harassment. Photograph: Alamy Stock Photo

In an interview with the Guardian, Gordon who is setting up a nonprofit to help victims of sexual harassment said, We are all paying a cost for harassment.

By removing talented, capable, willing people from the workforce, we are hindering our ability to capitalize on the full potential of our entire society. When large portions of the population feel unsafe or completely remove themselves or theyre involuntarily removed from the workforce, were limiting our potential. On a large scale.

The costume designer

In 2010, Emma Bowers was one of the thousands of Hollywood strivers who perform creative work, for little to no pay, with the hope of gaining a toehold in the industry.

It made her highly exploitable, she said. Bowers trade was costume design. When she took on unpaid work for Andy Signore, the creator of YouTube series Honest Trailers, she claims, he sexually harassed her and responded viciously when she talked about his conduct to co-workers. Signore has not made a public statement about the allegations, anddid not respond to request from the Guardian for comment.

It killed my desire to work in the industry, Bowers told the Guardian. I had kind of this meltdown. I said, Im done with this industry, I dont want to be in this world any more. And after that, I wasnt.

Today, she works in animal rescue, sometimes running educational workshops for kids. The animals and the children are nicer to me than anybody in the film industry ever was, she laughed.

The reporter

Michael Oreskes spent decades at the top of his field, first as the Washington bureau chief for the New York Times, then as the editorial director of NPR.

At least one reporter who accused him of sexual harassment said Oreskes stripped her of the confidence to reach the same heights.

When I first went to see him, it was after screwing up my nerve to try to be bold and maneuver myself into a better job, and after what happened with him, I never really tried that again, she told the Washington Post.

Oreskes has not publicly commented on the claims of harassment, but in an internal memo obtained by CNN, he wrote, I am deeply sorry to the people I hurt. My behavior was wrong and inexcusable, and I accept full responsibility.

The reporter, who asked to remain anonymous so as not to damage her employment prospects, added: The worst part of my whole encounter with Oreskes wasnt the weird offers of room service lunch or the tongue kiss but the fact that he utterly destroyed my ambition.

The actors

Sophie Dix felt like she was on the verge of success. Then she met Harvey Weinstein.

Now a screenplay writer, Dix in the 1990s was an actor with a growing repertoire, scoring roles opposite Donald Pleasence and Colin Firth. Weinstein, she claims, interrupted her rise after he sexually assaulted her in a hotel room one night and she refused to keep his attack to herself.

I was met with a wall of silence, she told the Guardian. People who were involved in the film were great, my friends and my family were amazing and very compassionate, but people in the industry didnt want to know about it, they didnt want to hear.

Dix doesnt know exactly what happened behind the scenes, but she never landed another movie role again.

Part of her was all right with that. I decided if this what being an actress is like, I dont want it, she said. She threw herself into her screenwriting career. But the assault, she said, was the single most damaging thing thats happened in my life and derailed her acting ambitions.

Weinstein has repeatedly denied accusations of non-consensual contact, although he has appeared to acknowledge having sexually harassed some workers.

Sophie Dix: I was met with a wall of silence. Photograph: Graeme Robertson for the Guardian

I had done some TV and stuff before, that but this was my big movie break, Dix recalled. I still had a decent acting career, but it was all in TV. I never really had a film career. I think my film career was massively cut short.

Ive had friends call after the New York Times pieces came out, some who are now really famous, who knew about it at the time, and they say: This was the moment it changed for you.

Others believe Weinstein himself played an active role in icing them out of the industry.

Annabella Sciorra, who has accused Weinstein of violently raping her, believes he wielded his power to cloud her reputation.

From 1992, I didnt work again until 1995, she told the New Yorker. I just kept getting this pushback of We heard you were difficult; we heard this or that. I think that that was the Harvey machine.

Her friend, the actor Rosie Perez, recalled urging her to go to the police. She said, I cant go to the police. Hes destroying my career.

Annabella Sciorra in New York. Photograph: Charles Sykes/AP

The Hollywood producer was a storied bully and media manipulator.

Darryl Hannah claims there were instant repercussions for resisting his advances. The Miramax plane left without her at an international premiere of Kill Bill 2, and her flights, stylists and accommodations were cancelled for another.

I thought that was the repercussion, you know, the backlash, Hannah said.

This fear of losing your career is not losing your ticket to a borrowed dress and earrings someone paid you to wear, said the actor Ellen Barkin. Its losing your ability to support yourself, to support your family, and this is fucking real whether you are the biggest movie star or the lowest-pay-grade assistant.

Emmy and Golden Globe-winner Jane Seymour was a young actor when she rejected the propositions of the most powerful man in Hollywood at that time.

Seymour said the man, who she did not name, threatened to blacklist her if she ever repeated the details of their encounter.

Youll never work ever again anywhere on the planet, Seymour said he told her. She called the incident devastating and said it caused her to drop out of acting for at least a year, and almost permanently.

The production company assistant

Weinstein Company assistants also say they came in for abuse that forced them to leave the industry.

Emily Nestor was a law school graduate and business school student when she considered turning a temporary position at the Weinstein Company into a career in movies.

Then Weinstein began to relentlessly proposition her, she says.

I was definitely traumatized for a while, in terms of feeling so harassed and frightened, Nestor said. It made me feel incredibly discouraged that this could be something that happens on a regular basis. I actually decided not to go into entertainment because of this incident.

Emily Nestor (right) at a film party in New York. Photograph: Patrick McMullan/Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

The comedians

Louis CK was one of the most revered names in comedy, and so was his agent.

That proved to be a career obstacle for comedians Dana Min Goodman and Julia Wolov, who claim that the comedian exposed himself to them and then grew angry when they told friends in the comedy world about his behavior.

Whenever they saw Louis CKs agent, Dave Becky, attached to a project and there were many times they didnt even bother to put themselves in the running.

We know immediately that we can never even submit our material, Wolov told the Times.

Louis CK has said the sexual allegations against him are true. Know I never threatened anyone, Becky has said.

Abby Schachner said she was deeply discouraged when she called Louis CK to invite him to a show and he masturbated while on the phone. She said the incident was one of the factors that pushed her out of comedy. Today, she illustrates childrens books.

I cant even make a phone call, how am I going to pursue this as a career? Schachner thought to herself at the time, she told the Guardian. It knocks your confidence away If you honestly feel no confidence, its better to hide.

Read more: http://ift.tt/2z9pbXt

from Viral News HQ http://ift.tt/2AW6evP via Viral News HQ

#IFTTT #Viral News HQ

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survivorcordillerablanca · 7 years

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Episode 4 Confessionals

RTP is a monster. Anyway, we fucking crushed that immunity. I wanted Jordan pines voted out. I've only ever played one org with him and he was my nemesis and I just don't have the mental capacity to deal with a nemesis in this one. Why couldn't Willa have done better

we won the music video.. and my ass edited a full video plus a roast after never using adobe premiere before so im pretty shook!! our tribe definitiely seems more... "kumbaya" than the other tribe which... eh. i want the drama! but other than that our tribes good. i def feel like ive been getting complacent with talking to people so im gonna start trying to ramp back up my social game to how it was in the first round hopefully?? i need to start talking more and making bonds. (not much i can really do though, willow katie and chris are on the bottom) i just have to ensure theyre still on the bottom and hopefully keep katie safe for me to work with?? willow and chris can go i guess. also charlotte can go too tbh. like id prefer me/bryce/zach/katie over me/bryce/zach/charlotte but a returnees alliance is easier to put together, so ill work with charlotte!! idk why i dont wanna work with her i just dont get a good vibe from her?? sounds dumb but im trying to trust my gut. and ... yeah not much has happened and i dont wanna make major waves just yet.

Free rice is so fun and not having to do grammar? Amazing! Hope I can do well in this challenge to show I'm useful. I feel like their isn't a lot of socializing happening on our tribe but I'm gonna try to change that. katieare propane torches dangerous? I want to go get one at home depot today. katiehere is my second confessional: charlotte seems chill I wonder if she will work with me in this game?

WILLA IS FINALLY GONE. God I can't believe he didn't compete in a single challenge and managed to not get first boot. We did Emma so dirty, I can't believe it, bring her back. Anyway, going in this reward challenge I'm not too fussed about whether we win or not, it would be nice to see what the Wishing Well is all about but eh, I'm not too fussed. Immunity is what I really want because now that we got rid of the dead weight I think the fingers may start to pointed at the winners AKA me and Jay. We have enough votes to tie it since Jordan is with us. We could potentially swing Adam but he's very much linked with Ryan who is linked with Lexi so it's...a mess. No tribal pls @ immunity gods!

Wow we won another challenge. Is the other tribe even trying? I didn't want to submit too much in case I seemed like a threat so I'm happy that I didn't do the most and we still won. I never find anything in the wishing well tho. Wish I knew who was picking the right number. But focusing on the positive, we won again!! ryan matthewi literally don't know what to do if we go to tribal. i won't want the full jordan pines experience to be blindsided by him. obviously lexi and i are a duo so im hoping we have options if that happens....

So I was looking over my Malaysia confessionals for some reason. What started as me trying to find my FTC speech turned into me reliving horrible and painful memories of Mitchell Kalabang calling me an idiot in many creative ways. Anyways, the reason I mention this is because I noticed that I made a lot of good, detailed confessionals in that game and I want to make sure I can do the same here for Athena. Well as of now, I think I'm in an okay position. I make a bit of chit chat with everyone now and again. I'll need to step that up today though just in case we go to tribal. I admit I've been slacking in my relationships with anyone who's name doesn't rhyme with Pordan Jines. I did congratulate Ryan on winning Kvaløya and told Adam that I'm not gonna vote him out, so that's something. Lexi also came to me and was like "I promise I'll do better on the challenge next time." Like I'm some authority on effort. Ryan probably told her that I was a little annoyed that no one tried in the video challenge. To sum it up, Jordan Pines will always be targeted before me so I am perfectly content letting him take the reins for the time being. I have decent relationships with Ryan and Adam. Lexi is with Ryan for sure. And Luke sketches me out just like every other game I've played with him. I hope we win immunity.

So we need to win this immunity or we fucked. Like it just doesn't make sense to me. On this tribe we have me jay luke ryan and adam. In theory we should never lose a challenge, but theory is dumb and we lose everything. Like we've managed to keep a cohesive group that i honestly think genuinly likes each other but like, if we lose its all over. If we win this immunity we can hopefully swap and go into it 6-6 and maybe bring katie over to our side. If we lose however everything is done. We go into what may be a divided tribal and lose any hope of keeping a tight 6. We can't lose. Dear god let us win immunity BryceCurrently I'm worried about Zach/Charlotte but I still trust them just something to look out for. Hoping we can win this immunity but if not I think I'd want chris or willow out probably but I'd fall back on my alliance with Zach/Charlotte/Carson

So of course our next immunity is a typing challenge. With this other tribe as insanely fast at typing as they are, I'm really not liking our chances at winning this immunity. I've been pretty busy the past couple of days so I feel like I may be in trouble if we lose.

wait i did that wrong; Katie Shoots Target # sorry i wasnt here on time

I love nothing more than a true underdog story. Zach and Bryce came in the fucking CLUTCH and pulled out that win for us. I can't believe it. In all my days of winning immunity challenges with a tribe, this is probably my favorite one. I'm so happy. I genuinely like everyone on my tribe and I'm so happy we aren't splitting up. Cue RTP laughing at this confessional because we're probably gonna have a swap next.

LOOK AT US WINNING IMMUNITY. SAFETY IS A GOOD COLOR ON ULTA!!!!!

Like ik im probs jinxing something but this game is boring nobody wants to talk game. also everyone just ends conversations after they respond to how are you, and i try and make small talk... like?? whatevs. im focusing on this game and i rlly wanna make merge. (also zach + bryce killed it woo i love them) nothing is rlly happening in this game which sucks. i predict that therell be a swap next round which is.. eh?? idk how i feel about that but im hoping i wont be swapfucked. (also i think im acc becoming good friends with zach and im happy hes gr8!!)

Wow me and Zach scoring all the points is good. I don't want to be seen as a challenge threat tho in case we swap and I'm somehow not in numbers. It's odd how like everyone hounds Jordan Pines and I can't tell if its jokingly or if hes enemy number 1 FJSDFHSJDF. I'm glad to not go to tribal and to have a 7-5 advantage. Whenever I talk to Willow we talk about nothing for like 2 minutes and thats it. Hasn't eaten meatloaf wish I were her, but hasn't had enchiladas? suspicious... Maybe shes vegan but even still how can I trust someone who doesn't know the goodness of an enchilada. Really wish I had some idea what was happening with the other tribe. Not being in a one world situation is different and I wish I could talk to them more to get a better picture seeing as how I'm going in blind if we swap/merge. Anyways that's all for now

I am well and truly fucked. I slept through all of my alarms last night and ended up missing the immunity challenge which we LOST. Guess what the agenda for the last two people who were voted off was? They didn't compete in challenges. Guess what I just didn't do? COMPETE IN A FUCKING CHALLENGE. God I'm so screwed. My only hope right now is that Jordan and Jay don't hate me enough to vote with me and try and break up the duo of Ryan and Lexi. I'm going to have to pray that Adam will want to work with me too otherwise the vote will tie and I do NOT trust Jay enough to go to rocks for me. Jordan might do that but I don't trust Jay at all to risk his life like that for me. I have a lot of work to put into today so...pray for me.

WE WON IMMUNITYT! I'm so happy, i need to make two confessionals so this is one: im so happy i pulled through. I tried so hard to focus and make sure we didn't go to tribal because genuinely I like everyone on our tribe andd i'd feel bad voting anyone tbh. im not best socially right now and i think i need to use this time critically. I PROMISE ILL MAKE BETTER ONES NEXT ROUND HEHE

tribe assessment: bryce- iconic king. he's good at challenges, and i think him and i are semi close. i'm down for working w him and i think he's a good asset carson - my favourite i guess? im closest to him, him and i talk a LOT, and he's super fun and social. i'm a lil worried down the road ideally because of his social game, but for now he's an ally charlotte - her and i are in two games together, so it's risky. i trust her and like her, but our social game w/ one another isn't like phenomenal or anything. She is super sweet Chris - Like... him and I talk a fair amount, not a lot, but he's super cool. I love his puppy (or whoevers puppy that is) and i think he's super sweeet katie - similar as Chris. her and I dont talk a LOT but shes really cool and i think she's a good asset challenge-wise. willow- i love her she's so sweet but she never replies (or often, at least) so RIP! I do think ill end up working w her down the road though, she's a queen -- overall i do like everyone so going to tribal would be awful because i have to vote one out. BUT, theres been speculation on an upcoming swap too... so that's intense. but, nonetheless, im here for twists!

Nope. Thats all i got to say. Like we should have won that. and we didnt and now im mad. And we had a good group of 6 like it was the perfect group of people. But no. We now have to go down to 5 and fuck this up. So thanks RTP. Thanks a lot. Adam might go, he might now? i dont know. I dont care. Just give us a win please.

I'm trying to get the vote on Adam and I feel like even tho jay and Jordan agreed, just the way their talking to me making sure everything's alright with the plan and the fact Adam hasn't tried to PM me I feel like they're just lying

Ok so this is my immunity challenge confessional. We never win reward so i knew we were probably doomed and will never see the wishing well. but i didnt really care about reward. NOW FOR IMMUNITY. im alittle nervous because i feel like since we got rid of the non actives i'm the next in line. So i did my best for the immunity challenge. I mean i got 2 out of the 4 points we scored so i did half the work which in my opinion shows i care a bit. we were in the lead and then the other tribes whole fucking tribe comes out of nowhere and kicks our ass and im just like .....bye

Ok this is my before tribal council confessional. So after we lost ryan created an alliance with me,himself,jay, and jordan. which ok i dont trust jordan that much but i gotta take what i can get. They all want adam out even tho luke didnt do shit for the challenge. Which i like adam but not enough to try to switch the vote. So i prevoted adam but ryan and i feel like some shady shit may happen and one of us will go since people know were best friends. I'll raise hell if ryan goes and hopefully he'd do the same if i go. But i guess we'll see

Man this idol is gonna be so hard to find asdjkfadjsk wish their were hints to it AdamIt sucks that we lost the challenge. I didn't help much more than trying a few times in the beginning. I think I'll like it better when I can do individual challenges, cuz then I only have me to do the challenge so if I don't do it its just skin off my back. I have to make it there first, and that requires good relations with my tribemates, so I can't slack off anymore if I want to maintain that. I hope a swap comes soon, but not with the numbers stacked against Copa tribe members :/

I don't know what I'm going to do about tribal. I voted Luke but it really blows that we lost because I really liked all my teammates. I guess that's on me, maybe I shoulda done better and then we wouldn't be down a tribemate. Consequences and junk. I hope I'm not getting blindsided. I wouldn't put it past Jordan but it seems early in the game for that when we could be really good allies. Just depends if he trusts me I guess. I'm a loyal as fuck though, so I'm gonna make Jordan my main bitch this time. Only depends on if I'm his main bitch. Let's see if we go far together

Hahahahahahahahahahaha I found the idol. But its like one world style or w/e b/c I found the copa idol. And I had to give it to someone without knowing them and without them knowing i sent it. Thats unfortunate b/c I could bond with them but I guess if me and Luke are ever on the same tribe I can let him know and work with him. I was thinking Zach and Charlotte were really close but Charlotte didn't know about the idol map so maybe they aren't. But yaa I just asked my alliance to tell me who to give it to because I have no idea about any of those people having never played with them. Carson initially wanted me to give it to Jay O but then I decided to ask my whole alliance for input to try to make it seem like I'm close with them and want to stay together, which I did. And that's when they said lets give it to Luke. Also Anyone But Jordan Pines 2k17 which made me laugh

OKAY! I FORGOT TO DO ONE BUT ITS RIGHT AFTER TRIBAL SO HERE I AM! Adam is gone. Good. Me, Pines, Ryan, and Lexi are aligned. Meh, at best. If we lose, the original group of me Pines and Luke will split up their duo. Go us!

Did I do a confessional already? I have no idea. I'm in three games. Sue me. We won immunity this week so TBH I stopped paying attention after that happened. BUT HEY, APPARENTLY YOU CAN SEARCH FOR IDOLS AND I DIDN'T KNOW OOPS. Fuck, I'm the worst. How am I still here?

#NotAGameForLapdogs