#im trying to soend more time outside and doing things irl and present but ive been dissociating bad again

[faggotslime]

I truly feel like I need to separate myself from being online for a while.

#vent #personal #i dont want to because its like i have friends i can only talk to online / using my phone #but #being 'connected' has always given me some level of anxiety #and it's just gotten worse #i wanna see memes but i cant help but open the comments to seek out negativity and 'combat' it #to the point im just dunking on people #being quippy #i dont want to seek out stress and negativity nor respond to it that way #thats why i just post nature shit here #i truly feel like i need to just.... fuck off and remove myself from environments that encourage / enable that kind of reactivity #because i need to Not Act That Way™. i dont want to its gross. that needs to change. #but i also feel crazy wanting to just 🫡🫥 #if i remove myself from social media i can redirect thise impulses elsewhere into positive things and pick what to come back to #ive wanted to delete FB since 2018 but my mom likes sharing things with me and posting with me 🥺 #i dont have twitter #instagram is okay ig but i need to make a memes only feed and figure out how to turn off comments for myself #otherwise i honestly need to leave insta and only post shit & not spend time on my feed #im trying to soend more time outside and doing things irl and present but ive been dissociating bad again #spend* 😮‍💨 #w/e #if you read through this thanks 🫶🏼 #idk #im just screaming into the abyss #its just nice to not feel alone