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kindaorangey · 3 years

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jimmy kaga-ricci - part one (part two)

time in a tree (raleigh ritchie)

every lyric and i mean every lyric of this song applies to jimmy. it’s probably better if you watch the genius video on it, but i’ll just put some of the main ones here

“i need a place just for me/somewhere that i can be free”

“do you ever feel like, you could live a real life?/like everybody else in the real world, you could be a real girl?/you could be a wizard, or you could be in NASA, you could write fiction, you could tame raptors/most days i struggle and i get snappy/fuck all that, i just wanna be happy”

“i wanna be 10 again, just me and sonic/and nobody telling me i should be more than i am/back when i had a plan”

i spend too much time in my room (the band camino)

“i keep too many secrets from you” - mainly about rowan, think about the line after jimmy has a panic attack and rowan asks him if he wants to talk about it and jimmy says he doesn’t but in reality he does, he always does

“i care way too much about what they think” - the fans, the strangers at a party, the media, everyone

“i spend too much time in my head/wish i could say what needs to be said” - jimmy vs. authenticity

“my friends, they all smoke cigarettes/by wednesday i'll be smoking one too” - jimmy’s thoughts on lister’s addictions: “sometimes i think about taking drugs. sometimes i think it might help. when i see lister smoke and drink, i know it’s bad, but i understand why he does it.”

falling (florence + the machine)

“sometimes i wish for falling/wish for the release/wish for falling through the air/to give me some relief/because falling is not the problem/when i'm falling i'm in peace/it's only when i hit the ground/it causes all the grief”

“i'll dance myself up/drunk myself down/found people to love/left people to drown/i'm not scared to jump/i'm not scared to fall/if there was nowhere to land/i wouldn't be scared/at all”

this one’s sort of about how jimmy loves the band, loves the music, loves the costumes and the performance and all of that, but the almost unbearable side affect is the attention of the press and the fans. he cannot live his life in private anymore

the stand (mother mother)

mother mother on my favourite trans character’s playlist? you bet!! this one’s just basically the song form of sensory overload at a party, also:

“everyone’s fucked and they don’t even know” - death motif !!!!

all we do (oh wonder)

the sense jimmy has that he’s trapped in the horrid cycle of his life, hence the repetition of “all we do” throughout this song

sick little games (all time low)

“i'm finding me out/i'm having my doubts/i'm losing the best of me”

this lyric encapsulates the mental cycle jimmy goes through in iwbft, i think - trying to find enjoyment in things, not understanding his own growing disconnect, and hating himself because of it

ribs (lorde)

i can’t not have this on the jimmy playlist. he loves lorde. also, he hates that a lot of his youth has been stolen away by fame

superstar (lupe fiasco)

“and you better wear your shades/the spotlights here can burn holes through the stage/down through the basement, past the indian graves/where the dinosaurs laid and/out through china, nearly misses airliners/magnified times five, this was pointed at the rhymer/ricochets off the moon and sets the forest ablaze”

this song is about being trapped in a position of fame, and i feel like this line specifically applies to jimmy. he’s always thinking about anything other than the moment he’s in, his mind is about a million miles away. at one point he even describes this as an out-of-body thing

teen idle (marina)

this one’s about losing your teen years to something - in jimmy’s case, fame and mental health issues - and gaining a resentment of your peers who were able to enjoy their teen years. it speaks to me about jimmy’s want to kiss a boy and work himself out without the pressure of the public eye, his want for dramatic romance, and also his weird almost-envy of lister at the beginning of the book

i wish (hayley kiyoko)

always think about the fact that when magnet and lister each kiss jimmy, one of his thoughts is that he theoretically does want this sort of thing, but he doesn’t want the person attached - he just wants someone. this is especially true with lister, because it hits him that lister knows him, properly, and that he knows lister (he’s also harbouring repressed feelings for him, but that’s not the point)

spacing out (beabadoobee)

exactly what the title says. jimmy spends most of i was born for this spaced allll the way out

are you satisfied? (marina)

“was i meant to feel happy that my life/was just about to change?/one life pretending to be/the cat who got the cream” - jimmy isn’t okay with the trade-off of wealth and fame in exchange for no privacy or freedom

“it's my problem if I wanna pack up and run away” - ‘cause you know... he does

ketchum, ID (boygenius)

“i am never anywhere/anywhere i go/when i'm home, i'm never there/long enough to know”

nobody (mitski)

again, jimmy just wants someone!! anyone!! he just wants to feel normal for a while by having a normal romantic relationship!!

love and truth (mother mother)

this one’s a bit of a miracle, because if you could condense what’s important to jimmy down into two words, it would be ‘love’ and ‘truth’.

“is my life not all that i thought it would be?/is it simply ordinary?/oh, is it far from all my fantasies?/.../i lie awake at night and brood (poor you)/about the things i never do/and how i'm missing out on love and truth”

it’s almost tongue-in-cheek, and jimmy does sometimes take a step back from how much he hates his life to say “why can’t i be grateful for this?” he can hardly take himself seriously, and neither can the narrator of this song. also, another mother mother song heyyyyyy

#playlists #long post #death mention

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