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jugniofrp · 7 years

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you decided to keep the baby, you knew you wanted for you and tanya and that little life in her to be a family. everything goes off without a hitch. you're in the hospital, it's a baby girl. you name her ahaana, she has her mother's eyes and dimples and when she clutches your thumb in your tiny fist - you've never felt anything more pure. you're watching her with the other babies when medics rush to tanya's hospital room. you follow them, watch her crash, EKG silent. she's gone (ibjbkj)

Aarav stares at Tanya’s lifeless form, unable to fathom what had happened. Just moments…moments ago everything had been fine—no it hadn’t been fine, it had been INDESCRIBABLE. Truly, Aarav had never known this type of happiness and yet before he could even allow himself to bask in it—it was snatched away from him. His TANYA was snatched away from him.

It wasn’t fair. It really wasn’t fair. He watched the doctors all leave her room one by one, allowing him entry now but he was scared. She had been smiling tiredly and watching him with their daughter just moments ago. How could everything change like this? How could he raise their little girl all alone? Tanya was supposed to be there, she was supposed to help. Ahaana had just been in the world a few hours before her mother was gone and how was that her fault? Why did Ahaana have to be brought into a world where she’d be forced to grow up without a mother? It just WAS NOT fair.

But when Aarav sat down on Tanya’s bed, holding her still warm hand in his own, he broke down completely. His hands pulling her lifeless body against his own, no words being said, no drama, just a silent desperation. A silent plea for his wife to come back to him. If anyone was there—listening, all he wanted was ONE miracle.

Except, maybe Aarav had gotten his one miracle in the form of their healthy baby girl, of knowing she was evidence of the love he and Tanya shared and ultimately he knew that she’d live on in their little girl.

But somewhere, Aarav knew this day would haunt him. His daughter’s birthday would be her mother’s death anniversary and that was something Aarav didn’t know yet how he’d overcome…he didn’t think he EVER would.

#memes #c: aarav roy #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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arohi loves you but she’ll NEVER marry you. why would she want to? you can’t even hold onto a girl and tell her you love her. all you do is mope about your life. she deserves somebody who isnt so selfish

Sahil hears these words and immediately takes them to be true. How could they not be? Sahil was selfish and a whiner. Why would someone as amazing as Arohi ever want to be with him? They had their memories, enough to last him a lifetime even if she’d probably quickly move on to the next great love of her life. But he didn’t want her to..

Sahil wanted to hear her say she loved him, because for the first time in his life he wanted to SCREAM it from the rooftops that he loved Arohi Khanna. And yet once more, he froze up—Arohi still deserved better; she’d live on in his written words at least. That was something no one could think of taking away from him.

“You’re right—she does deserve someone who knows how to tell her he loves her, and someone who can match her..that’ll never be me. I just hope—whoever she ends up with, keeps her happy.”

#memes #c: sahil khurrana #I still don't like you very much #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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“i’m late.” ”i miss you so much.” - veeriya

“i’m late.” / ”i miss you so much.”

When Veer had said goodbye to Diya in the SUV before letting her step out and head towards the airport, he’d known something was wrong. Her smile wasn’t as bright as normal and when they hugged--it had felt almost half hearted.

Of course, he didn’t think too much of it at the time, assuming that maybe she just wasn’t as inclined to head out to NYC for the IIFA awards. It wasn’t that much of a surprise considering that most of the time, Veer thought they were a sham and if he ever attended them, it was only because Diya was touted to winning the big honours.

Still, he waited there on the curb, in his black, ostentatious vehicle, waiting to see her get into the airport alright. Especially with all the fans and paparazzi trying to take pictures even though she was clearly not in the mood to socialize and be superstar Diya Mehra.

Once he spotted her disappearing behind the golden doors, he told his driver to go ahead and head on home. But Veer was feeling anxious for some reason and it wasn’t at all a good feeling, especially when he couldn’t figure out what it was.

He and Diya had been apart before, many times actually. It was either for film shootings, or when Diya had gone to school in London while Veer had stayed and chosen to not pursue higher education but they’d been apart and for a longer time as well.

But that was different.

And it was different because now-- Diya and Veer weren’t friends; well that wasn’t entirely true because they were always going to be frends but there was something else now, something stronger between them.

It had happened later after one of those stupid filmy parties she’d dragged him along to. He’d seen Saachi there and of course had waited until Diya was occupied with the rest of her ‘outstanding box offices’ friends before making a beeline for her. The two of them had sat in the corner and had a blast but Diya hadn’t been happy. She’d left without telling him, but making sure he knew by the frequent glares in his direction and he’d instantly followed after her.

One thing led to another and the two of them were fighting in one of the thankfully quiet and not crowded residential streets of Juhu. Veer couldn’t even recall what had been said, all he remembered was telling her over and over how nobody else mattered to him the way Diya did and when she’d gripped his shirt tightly and tugged him towards her--Veer had been stunned but at the same time--not too surprised; almost as if he knew this was supposed to happen.

The two of them had gone to Diya’s place, the apartment they’d picked out together and had allowed themselves to give in to everything that night. It could be blamed on the fight, the jealousy, the intoxication both of them were dealing with--everything really. But they’d spent the night together and surprisingly things after that hadn’t been awkward--not until tonight at least.

They’d remained close, and so now whenever he tugged her close, held her hands--it almost signified a different meaning for both of them, or at least Veer was hoping it did. He didn’t fall in love easily, not quite understanding how someone could give their all to another person and not really expect anything in return. But of course, that had been until one of his friends pointed out that his relationship with Diya--was exactly like that.

It was surprising and of course Veer had been adamant to refute the idea but when he was alone, he would think about it and realize that it was actually the truth. Diya was the one person who Veer would lay his life down for if the occasion ever arose.

It was while he was lost in those thoughts that he realized his phone was ringing and when he glanced down--Diya’s smiling face looked back up at him.

“Well hello, already past security?”

“Waiting at the gate actually,” she informed him quietly causing the frown to grow on his forehead. There was something wrong and it killed him that she wouldn’t tell him right away.

But Veer didn’t want to push, he knew how she’d get if he did. Diya would always choose to close off if the topic got too serious or started veering off in some direction she didn’t like.

“And--sab theek?” But Diya didn’t respond right away and Veer was left clutching his phone, praying she’d say something that would let his heart rest easy but instead he only heard a soft sigh that had his heart lurching, a feeling he remembered experiencing many times when she’d been in London--but only now figuring out what it meant.

He hated knowing she was upset or sad or angry or anything that wasn’t a good feeling. Veer was meant to be the one to put a smile on Diya’s face, no matter what was happening and right now--he felt like he was failing.

“I’m late,” came her soft response, one that had him glancing at the watch on his wrist, shaking his head. “No you’re not--tumhari flight toh-- oh.”

And just like that--he understood everything. Why she wasn’t her normal self, why she sounded upset and even anxious and why she wasn’t at all in the mood to head out for those dumb awards.

“You’re late.”

“I said that already,”

“I know but...wow,”

“Yeah..”

The two of them knew perfectly well what the other was thinking and yet even as they spoke, Diya only wanted one thing. For Veer to be sitting next to her, his stupid muscly arms just wrapped around her and holding her close. She was ordinarily a very self sufficient person but when it came to him, he became her teddy bear, her security blanket in a way as well.

“I just--I miss you so much,” she confessed quietly. “Just come be with me na, I don’t know how I’m going to be able to keep myself calm and not freak out at everyone over the weekend.”

Veer could only smile, gsturing for the driver to turn the car around and head back to the airport, listening to her as she began becoming slightly more like her oldself, able to express her thoughts a bit better than before. “You’re going to chew their heads off, and not at all be smiling in those pictures,”

“Exactly. Toh? Aajao na?” As a little incentive, she also added one more thing in. “Besides, I think I can bribe them to keep the plane grounded for a little longer, and even get your seat next to me in first,”

Veer only chuckled before sighing. “You’re so lucky that I needed my passport for some verification for dad’s production company today so I have it with me.”

“Meaning you--you’re coming?”

“I’ll meet you at gate B57 as soon as I can. And D? Relax. I’m with you no matter what.”

And it was with those words that he hung up as he began his little quest through the Chhatrapati Shivaji Airport T2, racing to buy his ticket and get his boarding pass, no luggage on hand as he sped through security, thankful that using his name in this situation was proving to be quite advantageous.

But it was when he found the gate and spotted all the people that he prayed he could blend in as he looked around for the most private corner and spotted her there, huddled up in the seat with her knees pulled up to her chest. “Well--guess I really should be superman in the next remake of the film huh?”

Diya’s face erupted into a wide grin as she opened her arms so that he could collapse next to her, holding her close, whispering how silly she was for telling him something like that when she was about to leave to take a flight halfway across the world. But still in her embrace, he found his heart relaxing once more, the anxiety fading away because she was there, and she was in his arms--where the two of them would figure things out.

#katrinarps #asks #otp: ho poori tujh hi se meri kahaani

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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♣ - krish

Send me a ♣ to have my muse talk about their children.

Hmmm what would you like to know? Asides from the fact that I have two, a boy and a girl, Aryan and Falguni. I mean--the reason I ask, is that when I start talking about them--I tend to ramble on. My wife absolutely hates it. Actually--she doesn’t hate it when I ramble about our kids, but generally. Anyways, you’ve asked about Aryan and Falu. So it’s funny, but while Aryan is the first born and we love our son of course, Falguni’s the one with like two nicknames and she’s really been regarded as the princess of the Malhotra family.

It’s just, we were much more protective with Aryan because he was the first baby, and then with Gungun, we were much more--able to relax, and take her out. It’s why most of the media has pictures of her throughout her childhood, she was much more exposed to our world here. But yet, Aryan is the one who wants to follow in my footsteps, at least kind of? But who knows rally--they both could or they could decide not to. I don’t really mind, as long as they both do something that makes them happy--that’s all Radha and I really want.

But more than anything, I know this is silly, but I really don’t want Aryan to be like me when I was younger. You know what I’m talking about--you’ve heard the stories too I’m sure, but yeah--it’s probably the only thing I’m worried about in regards to the two of them. Falguni toh bilkul meri acchi bachi hai, I don’t need to worry about her. She’s a full daddy’s little girl, and while Aryan is incredibly close to his mother, I worry that even though Radha was able to sudharao me--she won’t be able to do with our little hurricane of a son.

Even then, those two kids are my life. It’s funny, but I’d always wanted kids, and then when it happened, it was really nothing like I expected it to be..because it turned out to be even better.

#family meme #c: krish m #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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“now hold still…” “they had it coming, they were too friendly with you…” “it’s for your own good.” - sahi

“now hold still…” & “it’s for your own good.”

Sahil shouldn’t have been so eager to jump into the brawl. He should’ve just continued walking with the tour guide he’d hired weeks ago to take him around Havana. Of course, he didn’t need the man now since he had Arohi taking him everywhere but it had already been booked so he didn’t want to let the money go to waste.

Instead, Sahil ended up telling the guide where all he wanted to go, and perhaps that’s how they found themselves in a rather run down area of the city, one where only the locals would really visit. But he’d spotted a girl being bothered by one of the men there and perhaps it had been the Good Samaritan in him that had provoked him, or something else but Sahil ran ahead.

He could faintly hear the tour guide telling him not to, that it wasn’t his place but Sahil had Indian blood flooding through his veins where they’d jump into any situation even if it had nothing to do with them.

Plus in his defence–he’d gotten a few punches in before the other, much taller man had him on his back on the cobbled street, getting kicked and punched as if he were a human punching bag.

Sahil could swear he’d blacked out a few times during this whole fight but that didn’t stop him from stumbling as he stood, noting how his outside wallet which thankfully only had some cash instead of his identification or anything inside.

It was something his mother had told him when he’d first been planning to come to Cuba. He should have two wallets, one inside his shirt that held his ID and the majority of his cash, while the accessible one outside should only have a little bit of money; her tip came in handy.

But Sahil was stumbling when he made his way to Arohi’s place, barely able to raise his hand high enough to knock, collapsing against the wall when he managed to create some type of sound.

A few moments later, he heard the door open and barely managed to look at her before shutting his eyes, feeling her tugging him inside, the surprise and annoyance evident in her voice. “What the hell is wrong with you? I only let you go with that lame ass tour guide because you were adamant..but God, what did he do to you?”

“He didn’t,” Sahil coughed into his hand, wincing when he caught the faint trace of blood on his hand before he tried to hide it from her.

He wanted to tell her what had happened, how it had all really been Sahil’s own damn fault in the first place but at the same time, he didn’t have the energy to get any of those words out. He knew he’d have time to tell her later on, because right now—he just wanted to close his eyes and fall asleep.

A light slap had his eyes opened once more while he only grumbled. “Stay with me. If you lose consciousness—I’ll have to take you to the hospital or something.”

Sahil only shook his head, he had a few days left here with her—and he couldn’t spend them in a hospital. He just couldn’t. Not when he knew he’d curse himself for it, not to mention all the regrets he’d have. “You—you need to clean my wounds, please?”

He was whispering now, both because he had caught the way she was looking at him and because getting his voice out was still strenuous.

But she looked apprehensive, almost as if she didn’t want to touch his wounds, lest she hurt him too much and with a sigh she shook her head. “I don’t--I don’t want to hurt you Sahil. I’d rather we go to a clinic or something, it’s for your own good.”

“No,” he murmured, taking hold of her hands in his, blinking rapidly to avoid his eyes from shutting completely. “I don’t want to go anywhere--I want to just stay here..please.”

Arohi nodded before helping him lean against the couch while she hurried to grab the first aid box, knowing that she wasn’t at all professional but she’d still do the best she could.

“Now hold still,”

Sahil should’ve heard those words, maybe if he had—he’d have realized she was warning him to the excruciatingly stinging pain he was going to be dealing with. But he hadn’t—which was why he grabbed the nearby pillow and had crushed it between his hands while she dabbed some antiseptic against his lip.

“You know—this whole beat up look, is much more attractive than your deer lost in the headlights thing. Maybe you should think about it some more,”

Sahil only gaped at her; first amused that she was actually advising him to go get beat up, before he realized how ridiculous that sounded. “You really are a weird one Arohi Khanna.”

She only nodded before leaning in, her lips pressed against his cheek. “And that’s why you’ve spent practically your entire trip with me right? Because my weirdness attracts you.”

“That’s definitely not the only thing that attracts me,” Sahil whispered before his arms wound around her waist, tugging her closer as he forgot about whatever pain was still evident in almost every part of his body.

“they had it coming, they were too friendly with you…”

Sahil had never expected Arohi to be quite as possessive as she was behaving this evening. It made him rather excited to really find out how she felt towards him considering she was such a closed book on the subject.

Yes, Arohi was a free bird and mostly anyone could tell what she was thinking or feeling but there would be those certain moments like these—where she was entirely mysterious.

But tonight, since it was their last night together—she was being a lot more open with what she was feeling.

Her fingers were digging into his bicep as she gripped him tightly, which almost made him wonder how much she’d had to drink before he’d arrived back at her place after checking out of his hotel. But he didn’t say anything, choosing to instead just walk quietly with her as they went to a new restaurant along the water’s edge.

However he hadn’t missed the way her eyes seemed sad and sullen. But that was only when she didn’t think he was looking at her. Otherwise she was behaving pretty much like her normal self. Only—he could see and feel the differences even if she thought she was good at hiding them.

They were turning a corner and about to head a few steps towards the restaurant when they saw the waiting line outside, a groan escaped Arohi’s mouth before she turned to face Sahil. “What now?”

“We’ll wait,” he murmured quietly, tugging her in and pressing his lips against her forehead. Neither of them had noticed the other queued customers watching them—at least not right away.

Arohi had seen them moments later and that’s when she’d tugged him closer to herself, her fingers curling around the linen shirt he was wearing. “What are you doing?”

“Just reminding everyone here that you’re mine.” Except her voice was barely a whisper, and the seductive tone didn’t help Sahil at all. He ended up gripping her harshly at the waist, tugging her away from him, because he knew if they stayed like that even for a moment too long—he’d take her into the alley or something.

“You guys look so in love,” one of the nearby girls gushed. “I mean if my boyfriend was half as sweet as you..”

“Stop lying,” said another girl. “You don’t even have a boyfriend.”

The other three girls chuckled before one of them shrugged. “That was why we were plotting on getting your attention.”

Sahil only smiled politely, not unfamiliar to female attention, but also noticing how once more Arohi had curved herself into his body. Plus it surprised him how she’d not raised an objection to him being called her boyfriend—but he dismissed it as he returned his attention to the girls.

“You don’t need to plot to get my attention, especially when I’m already here with someone,” he laughed before shrugging. “But maybe just try being more yourself—that’s how this one did it,” he smiled before tugging a fake smiling Arohi into himself.

It should’ve surprised him about how open and possessive Arohi was behaving today, but he hadn’t allowed himself to dwell on it too much, choosing instead to just try and bribe the maitre’d to hurry up their reservation, not missing the groans that came from the other guests still waiting for a table.

Once the two of them had been seated, he watched in amusement as Arohi gestured for the waiter to come over to their table.

“Yes ma’am, what can I get you?”

But she shook her head, inching for him to come a little closer before whispering that she wanted him to serve grapefruit juice without added sugar to all the group of girls outside, and while the waiter and she exchanged similar grins—Sahil only groaned. He’d never seen her quite so—in a pranking mood and a part of him hated that it was only on his last day that he was getting to witness it. Still, he went ahead and asked the question that had been on his lips for a few moments.

“Why?”

Arohi only shrugged before taking a sip of the water that had been placed in front of them. “They had it coming, they were too friendly with you…”

“So you remind them that life is actually ridiculously bitter?” Sahil was working on keeping a stern expression on his face, not wanting her to see just how amused he was by the whole thing.

Arohi nodded, reaching over to grip his hand with her own. “You know you’re actually really impressed. Like you may not say it—but your eyes give it away,” her grin was infectious now and Sahil found himself smiling back.

“I’m going to miss you—so much,” he whispered before bringing her hand up to his mouth, kissing the back of it gently, his eyes softening as he realized he’d said those words out loud, and she hadn’t pulled away because maybe, she was going to miss him too, even if she wouldn’t say it.

#drabbles #otp: where there's smoke there is a fire #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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✦ ☎ ◈ - sahi

ahem ahem

[ ✦ ] my muse pushes yours out of frustration/anger.

It had been four days, f o u r days since Sahil had written even one line. No matter if it was music or for his novel. It wasn’t a lack of muse because the more time he spent with Arohi, at her place and out exploring the city--he found himself eager to write more, to tell the stories that he envisioned whenever she was around.

Sahil wasn’t a poet, and he’d never claim to be overly romantic because truly--those types of things usually just made him roll his eyes in annoyance. But being with Arohi made him see rose petals floating around her as if there was some light, some brightness that was wrapped around her wherever she went.

But now--he was just frustrated because he wasn’t making any progress and instead of dealing with it the way he should, by taking a break and coming back to it later, he’d holed himself up in his hotel room, avoiding Arohi’s calls and texts because he needed to get something written.

Of course, if Sahil was smarter, he’d have realized that Arohi knew exactly where he was staying, and his room number too which meant--that knock on his door, had to be her. And perhaps it was the need to see her, that had him opening his door to let her in. But he didn’t greet her, he didn’t kiss her, and he didn’t say anything--deciding to reclaim his window seat with his laptop.

Arohi however, wasn’t the type to be easily ignored and so she’d sit down next to him, she’d prod and poke, becoming almost incessantly annoying until he finally slammed his MacBook shut and shoved her shoulder.

It was strange, but the moment his hand touched her shoulder, he realized what he’d done and knew it was going to change the ease between them because how dare he lay a hand on her? Even if it wasn’t a real slap, he should’ve have allowed his anger, his annoyance to take over like that.

“I’m so--I’m so sorry,” he whispered, trying to reach for her before he felt his hands being shoved away. Arohi didn’t say anything, but her eyes said it all. She was hurt, and she was angry and it was going to be virtually impossible for him to even attempt to make her understand.

[ ☎ ] my muse calls yours in tears.

Sahil hadn’t ever thought he’d be crying, but something in him had broken and now he was devastated, almost broken inside and it was a feeling he didn’t know how to deal with. Even though he was currently in Delhi and he had absolutely no idea where Arohi was--he called her up.

The phone kept ringing, over and over and over again. And it made him wonder if she’d changed her number or if she was just screening his calls but the moment he was about to give up and hang up, he heard her voice.

“Hi--it’s Sahil,” he murmured, trying to keep the sadness out of his voice. And while Arohi had gotten to know Sahil increasingly well, he didn’t think she’d be able to tell--at least he hoped she wouldn’t.

He heard her tell him that of course, she knew who it was, considering she did have caller ID, and instantly, it made him laugh. This was why he’d chosen to call her because he knew no matter what he was dealing with in his life--she’d be able to make him smile.

But the thing he was dealing with, he didn’t know how to voice. Sheena, his sister had gotten into a terrible accident and was now in a coma, and he just didn’t know how to deal with it. She was his baby sister, the one he took care of when his parents were busy making money for a better life. His little sister was his life, the only real attachment he’d had to this city, to this world. And to tell Arohi any of that, would mean something. The problem was--he didn’t know if she was going to be receptive towards it or not.

Still, he allowed the words to fall from his mouth, thankful that she hadn’t hung up on him yet. “My sister--she’s in a coma, and I didn’t know who else to call. I know we’re not--” and the words didn’t come, because really--what were Arohi and Sahil? They were more than friends, but they weren’t able to give a name to the relationship they shared and truthfully, he was okay with that because it was between them.

Yet, when Arohi began asking him stories about Sheena, her likes, and dislikes, he knew it was her way of consoling him by asking about his sister, making sure he was remembering only the good moments. He never admitted it to her when she asked after that night if he’d been crying, but truthfully she’d managed to help him find a more positive outlook towards the whole thing without even realizing.

[ ◈ ] my muse makes a drunk confession to your muse.

Drinking was in his Punjabi blood. Sahil Khurrana actually held a record at his local club for being able to down the highest number of beer bottles in the shortest amount of time. However, though most would assume it meant his threshold was also higher--it wasn’t. Alcohol affected Sahil very quickly and very effectively.

He was easily drunk and now he was still stumbling along the cobbled streets, clutching his Arohi around the waist as she led him home, laughing at how he seemed to have put a leash around her using his hands.

The funny thing was, he knew no one could ever tie a leash to Arohi and no one ever should. Arohi was a free bird, a bird he wanted to fly with. But the truth was, he was too scared that he wouldn’t fit into her lifestyle and slowly but surely she’d grow tired of him. She liked him now because he was on vacation and so there was a set date for him to go back to his own life, allowing her to also return to her own.

But if he stayed--if he chose to become a nomad like her--she’d feel suffocated.

“You know Arohi, you’re very pretty.”

Of course, she agreed with that easily, telling him that she wasn’t only pretty, but rather hot and sexy too. Sahil agreed with all that, laughing when she unlocked the door to her place before he tugged her even closer, his chin resting on her shoulder, arms still around her.

“You know--you make me smile, you make me--happy.” He murmured, grinning as he gave her a sloppy little kiss on the cheek. “But--I know this won’t last, you’ll get tired and you’ll go off in search of another adventure, but me--I’m going back home, home to Delhi, home to my boring life locked away in my room.”

He released her then, blinking at her as he tried to adjust his eyes to the dim lighting in her apartment before clutching her hands tightly now. “But--I won’t go if you stop me..just please, stop me Roo. Stop me from leaving..and I promise I’ll stay for as long as you want.”

Another reason why Sahil should be staying away from booze of any kind. He said things that he’d never want to recollect in the morning. He wasn’t a romantic, not by a long shot which meant things like that--were not things he ever said to anyone.

The good thing was that the next morning--Arohi would pretend he hadn’t said any of these things--and he wouldn’t remember them either but still, somewhere they’d remain underlying between them--always there, even if they were invisible.

#otp: where there's smoke there is a fire #send me a symbol #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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29 21 - canon kriya

29. a heartbreaking text

[ text - baby 😘 ]: You’re gone. I know you’re gone and yet I need to say so much to you. I know I’ve already said it all to you when you were--when you were leaving me but there’s still so much more. How can it ever be enough? I have a full life of things that I still need to tell you. You are the love of my life Tanya Sen Malhotra. You have made me the most happiest man in the world by agreeing to be a part of my life. I sometimes worry that--I never told you that enough, or made you realize it but, now with you gone--I know the fear is going to be even worse because what if you left without knowing? What if you’ll never truly understand wha you mean to me?

[ text - baby 😘 ]: Just come back baby..please, just come back because, I don’t know how to live without you. From the day we met, we’d never been apart and I don’t know if I can handle it now.. tere begair--main hamesha adhoora hi rahoonga...

21. a long text

[ text - baby 😘 ]: He hates me. Rahul hates me. Our son--hates me. And it’s all my fault. I can’t--I see you whenever I look at him. He’s got your eyes, and your smile and I know it’s horrible, and that I’m a terrible father, but main kya karoon? Every time I think I’m a little bit closer at being over the reality--I see him and it reminds me of your lifeless body on that hospital bed. You weren’t supposed to leave me Tanya. You were supposed to hold on. You were supposed to let us find some type of cure. Kitni selfish nikli na tum? Thoda dard nahi seh saki? And instead--you left the rest of us to deal with your being gone? Your mom still cries you know? Every time she comes to Mumbai--she walks past our bedroom, she walks past the room you used to paint and she cries. We all know why but we never say anything. It’s best that way. I like it too. No one says anything when I cry, or when I stay holed up in my library because I miss you too much. You’re lucky, you never had to even try to live without me..but me--I lost the love of my life, and I’m left with our two sons, your last--your last gift to me and I’m still so overcome with my own grief that I can’t even be a good enough father to them..

#otp: der se hi sahi dil ko kisi pe hai yakeen #texting meme #wow I hate life #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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☎ ☯ ✜ - aaranya delinquent au

ahem

[ ☎ ] my muse calls yours in tears.

Aarav hadn’t heard from her Tanya in days, weeks actually and all his calls to her were getting ignored. He just didn’t understand what he’d done wrong. Yes, he’d left the halfway house but that was only because of Kishore Sen’s adamant attitude that Aarav leave and actually make a life for himself.

But every day away from the comfort and safety of that home was proving to make him struggle like anything. Aarav could feel his insides being split into two different ways, he wanted to revert back to who he used to be, the man who didn’t give a damn about himself or others but at the same time—he liked being the man he was now; the man Tanya had helped him become.

And so he called her, every single day, and he’d hear her voicemail and he’d leave her messages until one day he heard the dreaded ‘sorry this mailbox is full, and is unable to accept any more voicemails.’

Aarav couldn’t reach out to Kishore, asked him about Tanya but he didn’t want to alert the man of whatever was still blossoming between Aarav and Tanya. Or maybe it wasn’t blossoming now since she didn’t answer his calls or messages. Whatever it was though, he felt somewhat distraught because he wanted her, he wanted her in his life because she did what she told him in that first meeting. She hadn’t fixed him, she had only helped him become a better version of himself, or as she used to say—the best version of himself.

He remembered everything she’d ever said to him, the good, the bad and all the stuff that made him ache because of everything he’d told her. Tanya knew his whole life, every single one-on-one session they conducted had him confessing everything about his old life, his past to her.

And so he was ready to resign himself to another night of sleeping on his rock hard bed, memories of her going through his mind as he drifted off to sleep. Wondering where everything went wrong, wondering why she wanted nothing to do with him when everything had seemed so right.

That’s when his phone rang and considering it was past midnight now, he was surprised and curious until he turned it over to see her name flashing across. The contact picture one he’d taken of her without her realizing on the day he’d left, the first and only picture he’d saved on his new phone. But the moment he saw her face flashing across—his heart began racing, or maybe it skipped a beat—he didn’t know.

“He—hello?”

Only there was no other voice greeting him, instead, he only heard some—crying? Sniffling perhaps? “T—Tanya? Tum theek ho? What’s—what’s wrong? Talk to me. Please…”

But she was silent, except for her tears and he felt his heart lurching with every sob that escaped her. “Are you—are you at the house? I’ll come.”

Aarav needed to see her, he knew it had been weeks and he knew that she’d been avoiding him but none of that mattered, he didn’t care because she was in pain and he wasn’t there. This woman was someone who was ridiculously positive, almost to the extent that Aarav found her to be like an angel, something he’d only told her once before—and so to know she was crying, she was hurt—it pierced at his heart because this woman was so important to him.

Aarav had fallen so hard for her, so incredibly hard. He was irretrievably in love with her and he hadn’t even realized how or when it happened. He’d been so adamant to be this man, to be someone who didn’t want anyone to care about him, who didn’t need this in his life and yet—she’d shown him what love was, and he never looked back.

Sure some days were tough when he was faced with two options, one leading him down the same path, and the other going up a momentous hill. But he knew what she’d want him to choose and so he’d tread up that hill.

He knew that calling him in this type of moment was hard for her, no matter what was going on, and so his heart led him towards her once again.

The moment he saw her though, outside the house, sitting on those steps, his heart was thankful. She looked physically okay and so without a word, he sat down next to her—his arms wrapping around her, uncaring of who all saw.

They sat like that for maybe minutes, or maybe hours, Aarav didn’t know. All he remembered was the way he felt when he heard her soft confession.

“I can’t do it anymore, I can’t pretend not to care about you..but I’m so scared ke tum bhi mujhe bhool jaoge.”

He only sighed in response, pulling out his phone and showing her his background, showing her how empty the phone was except for her picture and mini goals in his notes about how he wanted to create a better life for himself, so that maybe one day even Kishore Sen would allow his daughter—to become one with the delinquent, Aarav Roy.

[ ☯ ] my muse tells yours that they never want to see them again.

As discussed this one will be a lot longer than a drabble and will come (hopefully) soon.

[ ✜ ] my muse collapses in front of yours, all bloodied and bruised.

Tanya was never late. It was one of her little quirks, to be honest, she’d always come everywhere early and then complain about how no one else was on time. Only her complaints were never really complaints because well—she always saw the good in everyone.

He didn’t know how it was possible that one of her habits that used to irk him so badly sometimes could have actually become one of the things he loved about her. Her ability to see the world through rainbow-tinted glasses. He envied her a lot, because of how happy and how carefree she seemed. But Aarav knew that somewhere there was some pain hidden in her wide happy dimpled smiles, maybe there was something broken behind those cheerful eyes he always looked into.

But right now, he was more focused on worrying about where she could be. When he heard a strange thump on his bedroom door, he frowned before standing and opening it. Their sessions were sometimes to be conducted in the privacy of his room rather than her therapist type of office and Aarav truly preferred that he felt he could be more honest when he didn’t feel like she was there to analyze him even if that’s truly what it was.

Theirs was a friendship, a starting of something between them but he didn’t know how she felt and so Aarav knew he’d never voice anything to her. Because whatever she was doing for him, was out of the goodness of her heart, it didn’t come from love the way he hoped it did. But what he hadn’t realized is that when he’d been out shopping with her one day, some of his old friends had seen them together.

Aarav would use the word friends very lightly because those guys weren’t the ones who had his best interests at heart, definitely not. They were cruel, they were hateful and they were dangerous. They also didn’t take betrayal very well. Aarav used to be a part of their gang, he used to be someone they counted as their best member until he went to juvie and now that he was in the halfway house, they took it as a betrayal that he was getting better and getting the help he needed.

It was sick, twisted logic, but he knew that’s how they functioned. But perhaps if he’d have known they’d spotted him, he’d have gone to them, told them how he was still on their side, still the same guy he used to be—all so he could protect the people he was now surrounded by. These were good people, Kishore, and Tanya, there should be more people like them in the world, more people with kindness embedded in their heart to help way-wards like Aarav.

But once he’d opened the door and had seen Tanya stumble in, his heart lurched. She was bloodied and bruised, almost as if someone had done this to her just to send a message across and the moment Aarav caught the dried blood on her arm in the symbol of a half broken star—he knew. It was from his old gang. They’d done this to the woman he admired, the woman who made him want to be a better man, all to teach him a lesson.

His heart was revolting at the thought of any of them even touching her which was why he carried her carefully to the couch, holding her preciously as if he was terrified of hurting her himself. It was only when she told him quietly that she was okay, just shaken up that he shook his head, tears falling from his eyes at her bravery.

“Yeh sab—this is my fault,” he whispered, clutching her hand tightly as he looked up at her. “You—this is because of who I am, or who I used to be.”

Tanya continued staring at him, surprised at how broken he was before she caught evidence of the Aarav he’d been when he first showed up at the house, the man filled with rage and a certain vengeance in his mind.

“No,” she whispered, shaking her head, fully aware of where his mind was going. “You can’t do anything Aarav. That’s what they want you to do, but you’ve—you’ve made so much progress. Don’t let them take that away.”

“Then what do you want me to do? Stand by helplessly while they take you away from me? Main woh nahi kar sakhta Tanya. Kabhi bhi nahi…”

But her hands were on his, holding him close to her on that couch, until she felt him turn to face her, thankful that his eyes were softening once more, the dark blackish shade returning to that warm comforting brown hue that she’d gotten used to admiring.

His hands tugged away from hers though, only to gently cup her face, his thumb rubbing at her bleeding lip to wipe it away before he pressed his forehead against hers. “I can’t—I can’t let anything happen to you,” he murmured, aware that by saying these things he was telling her in not so many words what she was meaning to him and while he should’ve been scared—he wasn’t; because she’d come to him. Instead of heading to the infirmary or hospital, she’d still come here to see him.

“You are the only good thing, the only good part of my life right now—and I can’t let anyone threaten you..no matter what,” his voice was a low whisper again, this time pulling away slightly so he could gently press his lips against her forehead. “Do you—understand?”

Tanya nodded before covering one of his hands on her cheek with her own. “I do, I know you’re angry but—this isn’t the answer. Violence won’t solve anything—you can only be a better person if you overcome the anger inside of you.”

“But they—they hurt you!”

“But I’m okay now? And you’ll—you’ll be by my side, right? You won’t let anything happen to me.”

And in that moment, in those words of hers, he knew that maybe she really did feel something for him too asides from the general relationship they shared. Maybe those lingerings looks, those brief hand contacts weren’t just in his imagination. Maybe with her help and support, Aarav could build a better life for himself—one where she was there by his side as well.

#send me a symbol #aaranya au: the delinquent #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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● ✌ ღ - aaranya

under the cut

[ ● ] my muse catches yours snooping through their belongings.

When Aarav used to leave for dance shows abroad or even within India, he didn’t mind as much because Tanya enjoyed that sparse alone time to hang out with her friends or do some more painting. However, since she got pregnant—he hated leaving her alone. And he couldn’t tell anyone either since they’d decided they’d tell people after the wedding which wasn’t for another two weeks.

Tanya wasn’t really showing yet since it wasn’t her second trimester yet, but it didn’t mean Aarav liked leaving her alone. He wanted to spend all this time with her, just–thankful that not only was she in love with him, but she actually seemed him a good human being, someone who could be a good father to their little baby. Because she knew all about his childhood and whatever baggage he carried with him into their relationship, it meant a lot to him.

But he was on his way to the airport when Aditi called him and told him they’d gotten the details all wrong. Their team wasn’t selected to participate until next month; he hated that a little bit more considering Tanya would be farther along then–but at least she’d have their friends around being a bit more protective then.

So despite the annoyance, he was feeling still, he made his way back to their apartment. They’d already moved into a spectacular sea-facing apartment that was ridiculously expensive but–Tanya had put down the down payment, without even letting him contribute a bit–but Aarav was already putting money away for their mortgage payments.

He unlocked the door to the apartment, surprised to hear Tanya’s voice call out. “Hey, come into the bedroom, maybe you can make sense of this stuff!”

But Aarav was confused because Tanya didn’t know he was coming home, and what could he help her make sense of? Still, he walked in the direction of her voice which led him to one of the spare bedrooms where his boxes were stored, still not unpacked.

“What–“ the moment she heard his voice, whatever was in her hands dropped to the ground, and it was heavy so it wasn’t inconspicuous at all. “What are you doing? Are you–you’re going through my things?” Aarav wasn’t too pleased, but he was far more amused especially considering his entire life, past, and present (and even his future) was all an open book to Tanya. So she really didn’t need to sneak behind his back like this.

“I—I was curious,“ Tanya murmured, attempting to pick up the large book she’d dropped to the ground. "Besides I’m your pregnant almost wife, I’m allowed to be a little neurotic,”

“Ah–but that would only apply if you stopped at just a little.”

Tanya’s mouth dropped open before she reached over to smack him—hard.

“Ow! Not so hard!” Aarav grumbled before rubbing at his arm before wrinkling his nose and wrapping his arms around her barely there stomach. “I should be the one mad. You were the one going through my old stuff.”

“Old stuff, meaning—stuff from before me.”

Aarav only shook his head at her words before pulling her in front of him. “That book you were looking at. That’s the old me,” he sighed before shrugging. “I know it’s hard for you to believe it, but I’m different now. You—you changed me.”

He continued waiting for Tanya’s reaction but instead, her arms just wound around him and he smiled into their embrace. He knew what it meant, what the unsaid words were telling him but mainly—he just wanted to make sure she knew that his book of conquests was when he was just a damn idiot who didn’t really think much of women until he happened to meet Tanya.

“It’s a book that I’m ready for you to go ahead and burn.”

The laughter he heard from her was enough for him to know that even if she was a little upset about the old guy he used to be—it was all fading away because she knew his life, his future was devoted solely to her.

[ ✌ ] my muse reaches out to yours after months of no communication.

Aarav knew letting Tanya go had been the biggest mistake of his life, but it was a mistake he’d have to come to terms with. Because he couldn’t give her what she wanted and he couldn’t stop her from finding that with someone else–no matter how much even the thought of her with someone else gnawed at him.

But Aarav wasn’t able to come to terms with it anymore because no one was telling him anything. He knew Aditi, Raina and even Samar and Aman kept in touch with Tanya and yet no one would say anything about her in front of Aarav. As if her name was some swear word that wasn’t allowed to be said, a taboo of some sorts.

While Aarav continued to pretend as if things were okay as if he was able to move on and get through everything despite the pain in his heart. But after he’d been lectured by Rohan, Samar and even Raina—he didn’t want to admit to anyone that he was hurting. It was futile maybe, but he knew at least that it would prevent them from pitying him.

But in reality—he looked at their pictures all the time, he looked at their messages to one another, where he’d call her shona, and she’d called him her roshogulla and he’d feel his heart constricting. He knew why it was doing so but—admitting to that would be severe, pathbreaking almost.

Aarav Roy was madly, irrevocably, and completely in love with Tanya Sen.

So despite that fact that it nearing 11 pm in Mumbai (and in Kolkata, where he last knew she was), he dialled her number. His heart was racing, almost threatening to thump right out of his chest.

ring. thump. ring. thump. ring. thump.

Until finally he heard her voice. “He—hello?”

And Aarav would swear his heart stopped at that point, or maybe it skipped a beat, but all he knew is that he felt something in his chest at the sound of her voice after all these months.

While Aarav knew this could go either way, she could be with someone, she could be happy with someone else, he was just so thankful to know she had answered the phone….unless of course she’d deleted his contact information and hadn’t even known it was him?

He stayed silent, just listening to the quiet sound of her breathing, a few random vehicle sounds in the background as well while they both stayed there, connected through the phone.

Until maybe Tanya couldn’t take the silence anymore and so she let out a quiet sigh. “Kuch—kahoge nahi?”

It only made him laugh because she knew him so well, she knew he was dying to speak but he just didn’t have the right words to say, he didn’t know what it was she wanted to hear. He just wanted to run over there and hold her in his arms and tell her how sorry he was.Instead, he quieted his laughter before clearing his throat. “Bahot kuch kehna hai—lekin iss pal ko…”

He didn’t want to ruin the moment, he didn’t want to let go of this moment because in his heart he knew he had a chance to never get it back. Tanya could tell him in an instant that she was happy with someone else and that he needed to never contact her again. But—his heart didn’t agree. It knew Tanya, and it knew that if she was with someone else—she’d have never picked up the phone, no matter what.

“I—I miss you,” his confession was soft and hearing her soft chuckle on the other end made it all worth it. He was overcoming his fear of love and emotions and she was still there, listening.

“Phir aajao na? Mere paas. I’m at our old place.”

And those were all the words Aarav needed to grab his keys and head over to the apartment he once called home, knowing that once again it would become home so long as he had Tanya in his life.

[ ღ ] my muse makes an attempt to cheer your muse up.

Aarav somehow knew this was an attempt of his that would horribly backfire, and yet he was too far along to back out now. He was dressed in a soldier's outfit, complete with a few bruises and cuts on his face to make it look like he was just returning from war all because he knew how much she sometimes enjoyed the fantasies she had.

And it was those VERY fantasies that he’d been making fun of when she’d all but banished him from their apartment. Well, she hadn’t banished him per say. Instead, she’d only gone to their bedroom and slammed the door shut very loudly.

It wasn’t all Aarav’s fault though, he’d found her list that she’d meant to exchange with Raina (Thank God he hadn’t seen Raina’s list because he did not want to know what types of thoughts crossed that woman’s mind). But he had seen Tanya’s list and number one on the list had been a man in uniform as one of her fantasies.

But Aarav being Aarav had, of course, decided to tease her relentlessly about it which led to her holing herself up in their room. And so he’d gathered their newest member of the family, Frosting, and cradled her up in his arms, whispering about what he should do to get ‘mommy’ in a better mood again. And the idea had hit him.

That’s what led to him standing outside their apartment in the uniform, but now he just hoped she’d open it quietly enough so he could take off his hat and tuck it under his arm, pretending to be some soldier who was desperate to see the woman he’d left behind when he’d gone to fight for their country.

Once the door opened, he noted how Tanya looked tired and annoyed, but all that faded away as soon as she took in his face before her eyes dropped down to not so subtly check him out in that uniform.

It was agonizing waiting for a response, but before he could even greet her in the formal voice he thought he’d perfected—her fingers had curled around his collar and dragged him into the apartment. That’s when he knew that maybe he hadn’t entirely cheered her up yet but he sure as hell had distracted her.

And plus, within a little while, she wouldn’t really have anything to be upset about.

#otp: I only call you when it's half past five #send me a symbol #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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✠ ❢ - kriya canon

(canon) [ ✠ ] it’s three in the morning and my muse unexpectedly arrives at your muse’s home.

Krish Malhotra knew Mumbai pretty well considering he'd been living here for so many years of his life. And yet when he heard about the threat of terrorism in an area that was /somewhat/ close to where Tanya was staying, he jumped into his car.

He knew it was the dumbest move he could make, because with one call to the commissioner and he could ensure Tanya having the utmost protection at her run down little building. But that wouldn't be enough because he wouldn't be able to make sure she was okay.

Of course, it was nearing 3 am, so he couldn't even call her and ask her if she was okay. No, he'd only disturb her once he was there. But they weren't--there was something there between them, but neither of them had given it a name yet. They enjoyed spending a lot of time together but defining this relationship wasn't high on their priority list.

The truth was, Krish was finding himself falling for her, and perhaps that's why he wanted nothing more than to make sure she was safe. As he drove north to her area of the city, he ended up passing the area under threat and saw a lot of officers there on duty; causing him to feel slight guilt at how he was so ready to call in favours and get protection for her, when he was very able to do that himself.

Krish arrived outside her home a couple minutes later, taking the elevator up to her floor in silence before he turned to face her front door. It was so late, how would she open the door without thinking he was some robber or rapist? That's why he didn't ring the doorbell, instead, he knocked softly before clearing his throat. "Tanya, are you awake? It's Krish, from your gallery,"

Shouting his full name could very well land him in trouble and so it was best to bring up the gallery, especially since he did frequent it every single evening once his shooting finished.

The door open moments later, with a very tired looking Tanya Sen on the other side. She blinked at him a few times before grabbing him by the collar and tugging him inside.

"What are you doing here?" She tightened the fluffy robe she was wearing over her pajamas. "It's like 3 in the morning Krish. If this is your way to invite someone to go partying or something--you should've called first."

He only laughed at her words before shaking his head and reaching for her, his fingers curling around the sleeve of her fluffy robe before he tugged her towards him. They'd hugged before, but this moment was different because he'd been really so worried about her which told him, his feelings weren't really quite so dismissible.

"There was a terrorist attack, a little away from here but I--"

His words were left incomplete because her arms had wrapped around his torso now too, her grip on his hoodie tight as she kept him pressed against her.

While he'd have asked in any other scenario why she was hugging him as if there was no tomorrow, he didn't right now--because really it sent a sense of relief through him. She didn't find him ridiculous or idiotic for allowing his thoughts to get the best of him.

Krish didn't know it yet, but that moment was going to cement their relationship even more in his eyes as time went on. She allowed him to be his somewhat neurotic self and he loved that.

(canon) [ ❢ ] my muse discovers yours all bloodied and bruised.

Krish had been away on shoot for the last two months and he DESPISED it. He never used to really, going out of the country for shoots were always one of his favourite things but now it meant leaving Tanya behind and when he was forced to leave her behind—he hated it.

They were in a relationship, yes, but he still wasn’t sure how open she’d be to being taken for foreign trips like this and he didn’t want it to seem at all like he was trying to buy her affections. not to mention that his last serious relationship with Radha had been so different in terms of how she viewed him spending his money on her; basically she hated it and that made him feel worse too because he wasn’t trying to show off or anything like that, but he just liked spoiling the people close to him.

But while Tanya wasn’t like that, he was still too wary of ruining it already. Wha the felt with her, was similar to what he’d felt before with Radha but somewhere it was still so different. It was almost like the broken parts of their souls had found each other before Tanya and Krish really had even realized. They wouldn’t talk about their pasts too much yet, but he could see the sadness in her eyes, it was the same look he had when he looked in the mirror in complete solitude. It’s why in some ways, he believed they were always meant to meet, meant to fall together, meant to find one another.

Krish wouldn’t admit these things though, not yet because he knew how people reacted to his overly romantic self and he didn’t want to scare Tanya away.

But as he unlocked his front door, he could hear Shanta tai talking in raised voices and that made him curious especially since the elderly woman was rarely heard speaking so loudly. That’s when he caught the strange man in the white coat in his living room, peering over—ohmygod! Tanya was lying on his couch, looking completely bruised and in pain. There was some blood spilling from her bottom lip, her forehead had a purplish bruise that seemed to be growing and her eyes were shut tightly as if she was trying not to show how much pain she was really in.

“Tanya! What happened?”

“Krish baba,” the older woman took his bags from him, taking him to the side as she told him how Tanya had shown up here just a few hours ago, barely able to walk from the taxi into their home and so Shanta tai had instantly called the doctor who was still looking over her.

“But what happened?” His voice was low now, and he looked over at her thankful to see that her eyes were open and she was staring back at him, but with no expression on her face. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, but until the doctor was gone and she was in his arms again—Krish wasn’t going to rest easy. “Does she need to go to the hospital? How bad are her injuries? What happened?”

The doctor simply looked up at Krish from his position on the ground and glared at him. “If you’ll relax Mr. Malhotra, I can tell you that Miss. Tanya Sen is perfectly alright. Yes, she had a bit of an incident a while ago, but she’s alright now.”

Tanya slowly inched up on the couch so that her back was supposed by the arm of it while she reached out for Krish, only for him to sit down on the edge next to her while Shanta tai took the doctor back out to the foyer.

“What—what happened?” Krish reached over, his hand brushing back the hair from her forehead, leaning over to press his lips ever so gently against her bruise. “Are you—sach mein tum theek ho na?”

Tanya only nodded, choosing instead to reach for him so that she could allow him to cradle her close and Krish easily obliged. He wouldn’t pretend to know what she was going through right now but he knew it had left her shaken.

She spoke quietly, in hitched breaths about how robbers had shown up at her place, threatened her with a blade while she’d given them whatever she had. Thankfully she’d kept most of her belongings at the gallery tonight since she was planning on staying over to work on her latest piece. But they’d been unsatisfied with what she’d given them and that’s when they tried to attack her with the knife, they’d also tried to get physical with her. Tanya hadn’t allowed them to come any closer, grabbing the nearest vase and slamming it in their direction before choosing to run out of her place, leaving everything but her iPhone behind as she got into the closet taxi, refusing the driver’s help to get to a hospital and rattled off Krish’s address instead.

“But I wasn’t going to be home until tomorrow—I just happened to catch an early flight—you still wanted to be here?”

Tanya only nodded before looking up at him through hooded eyelashes. “Being here, in your home—I feel safe again. As if nothing could hurt me and—maybe somewhere I knew you’d be home, I don’t know. Maybe I’m too delirious thanks to the medication.”

But Krish shook his head. She wasn’t delirious, he believed somewhere her subconscious had known this was where she needed to be and it led her here so that Krish could do what he so wanted to—take care of her the way she deserved to be taken care of.

“Move in with me. I know it’s too soon, and I don’t want it to seem like I’m trying to take advantage of you. I mean—you know, I’m okay with us taking this slow—but I don’t feel like that place is safe for you at all,”

Krish was waiting for her answer but it seemed like Tanya wasn’t in the mood to say anything verbally and so when she wrapped her arms around him tightly, he knew her answer.

#otp: der se hi sahi dil ko kisi pe hai yakeen #send me a symbol #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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◈ ☎ - leela+krish :D

just for background, Leela is Tanya’s older sister.

[ ◈ ] my muse makes a drunk confession to your muse.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. Tonight was supposed to turn out entirely different but here he was—drinking alone in a hall full of people at his very own rehearsal dinner. Krish Malhotra had it all. He was a successful actor, a good person, and engaged to marry the most sought after actress as well. Tanya Sen, she came from a filmy family as well and they’d worked together on numerous movies.

Was there love between them? Perhaps. Was it the type of love that was passionate, giving you a reason to get up every morning? Not in the slightest. Did they care about each other? Very much so.

And that’s why they were getting married. Tanya knew it would be beneficial for her to get married in to the Malhotra family and Krish? Well—he knew he’d never be able to be with the woman he was madly in love with—and besides hadn’t she’d been the one to tell him that it wasn’t love if you weren’t willing to live a life without that person?

That’s exactly what he was about to do.

But when the person he was madly in love with, walked directly past him, smiling and happy—he couldn’t do it anymore. Maybe he was selfish because he was feeling sorry for himself, but how could she just pretend not to care, pretend that nothing had happened between them just because she was a few years older and knew it would be frowned upon.

And so he did what he had to, he took hold of her arm and dragged her outside, thankful that none of the crowd had managed to spot them.

“Krish, what are you doing!?” Leela Sen’s voice was annoyed and Krish only gave her a smile before shrugging, suddenly realizing that maybe he’d downed too many glasses of scotch to be having this conversation with her. “You’re drunk. At your own—God, agar Papa ko pata chala, he’s going to be furious.”

“I don’t care Leela, I just—don’t care.” Krish whispered before looking out at the courtyard behind them. “All I cared about—was you, aur tu bhi, it doesn’t matter. Yeh shaadi, it’s not even a real wedding, you know that.” He scoffed before wrinkling his nose. “Your sister wants to marry me for the Malhotra name, and me—well, I know the one I want to marry would never want to marry me, so who fucking even cares?”

Leela didn’t say anything more, choosing to try and help him stand up straight so he didn’t make a complete and utter fool out of himself.

“Pyaar kyun nahi karti tum mujhse? Woh sab—everything that happened between us, you—you did love me once upon a time, didn’t you?”

“Yes Krish, I did,” Leela’s confession came quietly before she too shrugged and gave him a bittersweet smile. “And then I realized once upon a time is only for fairytales, and really life—it doesn’t work that way.”

Without another word, she moved back towards the doors leading back to the banquet hall. “And Krish, it’s about time you learn that reality too.”

[ ☎ ] my muse calls yours in tears.

Krish hadn’t expected to be dialing Leela’s number, especially considering he hadn’t spoken to her in what seemed like years and was now only calling her when it seemed like everything in his world was broken.

He just didn’t have anyone else to call, anyone else he could say those words to. Whatever he’d shared with Leela had been in the past, and it was just a harmless little crush that truly meant nothing; at least Krish had been adamant to convince himself of that.

But maybe falling into a relationship with Tanya Sen, Leela’s younger sister wasn’t exactly the best way to convince himself. Especially when after seeing Tanya locking lips with Krish’s own best friend—he didn’t feel complete morose and pain and instead just wanted to talk to Leela to get her take on things.

Maybe it was the height of emotions that had him sniffling into the phone but Krish was upset, and to the other person, it would truly sound like he was crying.

“Malhotra? What’s wrong—why are you crying?”

“I’m not.” He was adamant about that, but the more he said it, the more it sounded like he was about to burst into tears. “She—she’s with Abhi.”

And that was all he had to say. He could hear Leela getting into her car, and knew he should feel a bit guilty for making her drive to see him so late at night, but at the same time—whatever part of him that was still perhaps having feelings for her was glad. She still cared about him.

“I’m at the Sofitel in KBC,” he informed her quietly, telling her his exact room number and everything quickly even though he hadn’t wanted to hang up with her. “But—you don’t need to come.”

“I need to make sure you don’t do something stupid. You’re not called the filmiest actor for no reason Malhotra,” Leela’s voice had a hint of teasing and that actually caused a tiny smile to appear on his face. “Besides, she may be my sister, but you’re my close friend too—and if you need me, I’m here…always.”

But Leela wasn’t there always. In fact Krish waited and waited, and never heard from her because the line had gone dead suddenly and the longer he waited, the worse the feeling in his stomach got. It shouldn’t have taken this long.

And that’s when he got another phone call, this time from an unknown number he didn’t recognize.

“Hello?”

“Krish Malhotra? This is Inspector Shinde, kya aap Leela Sen ko jaante hai? You were the last called on her phone.”

“I do..” Krish knew with every passing moment where this phone call was heading and perhaps if he spoke slower, if he drew it out, he wouldn’t have to hear the words. He wouldn’t have to blame himself for being the reason Leela was on the phone when she was driving.

“I’m sorry to tell you, she was in an accident and she’s been taken to Lilavati hospital, aap jaldi se jaaye—I don’t believe she has much time left.”

And his phone fell from his own grip, the reality of him being the reason Leela was out there in the first place on the road hit him too hard. He’d done this. He’d caused this accident to happen because he was too selfish, too focused on just himself. Not even realizing for a second—that his one choice affected so many people around him—some even permanently.

#brotp: leela x krish #send me a symbol #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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☎ kriya

[ ☎ ] my muse calls yours in tears.

It had been six months, seventeen days and approximately four hours since he’d last since Tanya Sen. They’d been at some regular filmy party together and had only exchanged the normal greetings before scurrying off, each grabbing a corner of the room to stay in.

That’s what Krish hated the most, the way the two of them wouldn’t actively avoid each other, but it was obvious to the rest of the people there that there was some issue underlying. Krish knew what the issue was but he still didn’t agree with it. Because Tanya was regretting what happened between them and for Krish--that moment, that night--it was just a tip of what he wanted for the rest of his life.

But seeing her name now flashing across his phone, a goofy picture of her splayed out across his screen--it made him wary. He hadn’t heard from her like this in ages, probably since before that night and to get a call from her now--it was weird. Krish was tempted to let it go to voicemail, not wanting to get involved in something more tangled than it already was.

However, his heart which was always biased towards Tanya won out and he slid his thumb across the screen. “Well if it isn’t the greatest actress of this generation to hit Bollywood, how can I help you?”

But the sound Krish heard on the other end, that wasn’t at all what he expected. Tanya was crying. She was attempting to mask it of course, but Krish could hear it. “Tanya, what--what’s wrong?”

“I just--” she didn’t say anything more, and that only alarmed him further. He needed to know what was wrong, and why she was crying. Because yes Tanya was younger than he was, but she was always so strong in front of him and to hear her crying like this--it worried him.

"Talk to me please..”

Krish wanted to just go over to her place, he wanted to take her in his arms and hold her close to just console her. But he couldn’t. That was a line drawn between them now, a line that he couldn’t cross until she asked him to.

“Tumne review dekha? Of my latest?”

Krish knew which film she was talking about and which review too, but he also believed Tanya was better than that. He’d seen the film as well considering he was friends with the director of the film and knew that the reviewer had some grudge against Tanya and that’s why they said what they did.

The review talked about how Tanya wasn’t trying to work at her acting anymore, and she looked good but wooden and how she was nothing but a piece of furniture, only meant to draw the audience in.

“Tanya..” Krish started softly before grabbing a pillow off the couch and holding it close. “You know anything they say has to be taken with a grain of salt,” he whispered before sighing. “Tere jaisi actress, aaj tak maine nahi dekhi.”

But he knew those words weren’t enough for her right now. Perhaps she wasn’t crying, at least he couldn’t hear it anymore but it was still worrying him. “You’re still--you’re there right? Because I could tell you about the fourteen reviews of my earlier films that got me the worst reviews possible because they were truly horrendous,” Krish forced a laugh, trying to make it easier for Tanya to accept it.

“Krish, tum aaoge? I just--” But she trailed off, because they both knew what that meant to their faltering relationship but at the same time--maybe it was something they both needed.

“Of course,” he smiled to himself before getting up off the couch. “I’ll be right there--just make sure those tears from your eyes are gone--or else I’ll be forced to tell some really bad jokes.”

#kriya au: costars #send me a symbol #katrinarps #asks

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jugniofrp · 7 years

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ღ sahi

ahem ahem under the cut

Who’s the first to wake up in the morning: I do have to say Arohi does, mainly because she’s got a job and she’s got a schedule to keep for the most part until of course Sahil shows up and throws her schedule out the window. But back home in Delhi, he’s got a very disciplined schedule too.

Who’s the one to make breakfast: Arohi, like Sahil can only make coffee, and maybe some smoothies but even those sometimes need to be re done by Arohi because of the lack of taste considering he has no idea what fruits even compliment one another.

Who’s the one to serve the other breakfast in bed: I don’t think either of them, but I do see a rare day where Sahil attempts to, only--it’s very burnt toast and tea, because that’s all he could manage.

Who would suggest a quickie in the morning before work: Both of them, this is most definitely the two of them being very ruled by their physical needs with one another.

Who suggests they both ditch work to lay around all day: Sahil would do this, because well--he’s on vacation and works only when his muse strikes, and considering Arohi is pretty self employed--it’s okay for them to ditch work.

Who chooses the movies: Sahil would let Arohi do it, mainly because he likes having her initiate his foray into new things.

Who initiates kissing during the moving, thus distracting the other from the movie all together: Sahil, because please--she’d pick some Spanish movie and he’d just get so confused and tired of reading the subtitles that he’d completely divert his attention to something else.

Who orders lunch: Sahil would attempt to, but knowing him, he’d order something absolutely disgusting because of language barriers and would beg for her to help.

Who steals food from the other’s plate without asking: Also Sahil, but Arohi too, especially when she finishes her food and he’s still going at it because for some reason--he just takes too long to eat.

Who curls up next to the other and falls asleep due to a full tummy: Oohh Arohi, and Sahil actually loves it because she’s very cuddly when she’s sleepy and tired and all that. It’s his favourite part of spending time at her place.

Who distracts the other from trying to work at home: Oh god, considering they both pretty much do work from home--I see both of them doing this based on their own needs and wants. Like, I don’t even know how to choose this because they’re both very vocal about what they want.

Who asks to go get ice cream like a five year old: Hmmm Arohi, definitely her, and he’d obviously oblige because well, he likes seeing her happy.

Who takes pictures of their partner eating ice cream: Sahil would, especially when she’s got ice cream stuck on her nose which has him laughing very much.

Who makes a sexual joke about the dripping ice cream on their partner’s face: Both of them, Arohi wouldn’t say it, but she’d deliberately be licking it in such a way, that reminds him of something else and he’d be veryyyy uncomfortable.

Who cooks dinner: Arohi, but they also go out a lot because there are tons of cheap eating places around and it’s fun for them to be just spending time together.

Who cleans up the kitchen afterwards: They both do? I mean yes Arohi cooks so she shouldn’t have to clean but considering how Sahil’s cleaning habits are--and the fact that she’s very particular about how things are placed in her kitchen--she has to help.

Who stays up until 2 reading: I think this would be more so Sahil, but Arohi as well when she gets her hands on his book, she wouldn’t be able to put it down, even when he’s very obviously in the mood for something else.

Who stares at their partner while their sleeping: Sahil would be doing this and he’d be very awkward if she’d catch him but he’d definitely be the one watching her because she’s calm and quiet, and she looks so beautiful in the moonlight.

Who kisses their partner while they sleep: Also obviously Sahil, but he’d only do it when he’d be absolutely sure that she’s fully asleep and there is no chance of her catching him mid kiss.

#otp: where there's smoke there is a fire #shipping meme #katrinarps #asks

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