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toomanybandstocare · 11 months

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{Who's The Coward Now}

Program: Even though the medic somehow always finds a way to get under your skin, you hold a deep respect for Kix. That may have begun to turn into something more than a professional admiration. Until it shatters after an argument that continues onto the battlefield. Heated words are exchanged, but you'd rather hear him yelling at you than the radio silence that answers when you try to call him.

Pairing: Medic Kix x Support Agent, GN! Reader

Genre: Angst

Length: 3967w

Warnings: Reader and Kix say pretty hurtful things to each other because they care about each other type of deal, Battle scene, Medical scene, Couple of swears (as usual lmao)

Camp Resolute Masterlist

Counselor Notes: Thank you to @wizardofrozz for your help on this as a thought partner. It was so helpful & @obixwan, I hope you enjoy! Not too sure how I feel about this one tbh, but I am pretty happy with it.

“You have to be more careful,” Kix reprimands you. Though his hands carefully hold your head, he can’t control the anger burning through his veins. With one hand still holding your head, he tosses the blood soaked gauze and quickly takes another from his medical table. Pressing the fresh swab onto the cut on your forehead, Kix hesitates when you wince. His gaze softens momentarily and mumbles an apology.

“We all have a job to do, Kix,” you hoarsely explain, “I wasn’t about to sit on the side lines as our friends took their last breath”.

Kix pauses after placing a plaster on the small wound and looks away from it to meet your serious expression with one of disbelief. “We all have a job to do, but it doesn’t mean we have to sacrifice ourselves for nothing”.

“For nothing,” you exclaim and push his caring hands away.

His careless words cause your blood to boil as you look at him incredulously. In any other situation your stomach would have fluttered from his cute, wide eyed expression. Instead, knots twist your stomach as bile builds in the back of your throat.

“I would lay down my life without second thought to keep you and your family safe, Kix,” your voice breaks. “You and your brothers mean so much. Not just to each other, or to me, but to countless people across the galaxy. You have to understand that”.

You reach out with a shaky hand to try to hold onto him, but Kix ducks his head and steps away from you.

His weak voice murmurs your name before he says barely above a whisper, “We are nothing, but a surplus of pawns”.

Kix darts his tongue across his lip and swallows the lump forming in his throat. Everything feels numb and too much all at once. Pin pricks sting his skin. The fluorescent lights cause a dull ache to pound against his head. His heart shatters, and the pieces slash him from the inside.

With a shaky breath, Kix turns away from you and begins to clean his medical table. “When one of us dies, one thousand more run onto the battlefield to replace us. Clones are nothing, but cogs in the Republic’s machine. You have to understand that. There is no reason for you to risk your life for one of us when there are a million of me,” Kix explains and pulls his gaze from the bloody scraps that stain his fingers to look over at you.

Your heart pluments, and you open your mouth to try to reason with him. His raised hand and defeated smile silences you. “There is only one of you in this galaxy. I have no control over my life, or even how I die. The semblance of control I have is by helping my brothers and civvies when they need aid,” Kix’s voice subtly shakes as his eyes scan over your bandaged wound, “Do not put your life at risk for some clone”. Bile builds in the back of his throat as the memory of an assassin droid jumping at you and nearly cutting your life short. Just another reason he owes Jesse his life.

Your eyes sting as you look at the man who stands before you, completely unrecognizable in front of the one who has slowly been stealing your heart much to your dismay. Instead of the teasing, know it all of a medic, you see a man hiding behind the mask of his fallen brothers. “You are so wrong,” you firmly breath out. “And if you can't realize how much you--or your brothers-- have to offer the galaxy for just existing as individuals, then you’re truly pathetic,” you spit out.

As if your words cut him, Kix staggers a step backwards. Your steely gaze freezes him in place as you stand up from the cot. “Not because you are a clone,” you continue with a growing fire in your voice, “Because you are a coward of a man who would rather fall into society’s place and play the victim. I hear your lies, and I see right through you, Kix. You are afraid of what happens next after the war, so you’re pushing me away. You’re isolating yourself to put the blame on yourself and the situation rather than trying to make the best of it and make a difference”.

Kix clutches the edge of the cold durasteel table. Your words tear down the reality he’s tried to come to terms with. His head spins as his lungs seem to be weighed down as he desperately tries to breathe. He opens his mouth to try to … explain himself? No, that doesn’t seem right. But there’s nothing to defend, right?

“If you’re even thinking about trying to convince me that you’re right in this situation,” your voice trembles with anger, “I am walking out that door”. There’s a beat of silence as the two of you look at each other. Even with the ventilation fan whirring in the background, the air hangs heavy in a thick blanket. Kix turns his back to you to continue cleaning his workstation.

Without second thought, you turn on your heel and walk swiftly out of the medbay. A blistering heat washes over you, and only once weaving through the starship’s corridors do you feel like you can breathe again.

Fog consumes the battlefield, and the tense atmosphere weighs down on your shoulders. You peer around the boulder you’ve taken shelter behind. Blaster bolts cut through the thick blanket of mist. Surveying the area, your eyes widen when a red beam shoots toward you. With your heart pounding in your throat, you throw yourself backwards for cover once more. A flurry of embers kiss the arm you use to block the scorching rock fragments and debris flying around you from the blast.

“We need you to infiltrate the ray shields three klicks North of your position,” General Skywalker’s voice crackles through your comlink. Echoes of reflected blaster bolts and battalion commands blend in disharmony behind his tired words.

“Easier said than done,” you yell through gritted teeth. Pushing into the balls of your feet and clenching your fists, you push from your crouched position and take off across the crumbled terrain. “I can’t see a damned thing,” you relay back to the battalion as you duck away from a blitz of crossfire, “Some guidance would be helpful”.

“I can spare Kix and Jesse, but we’re not exactly in a better position than you,” Rex grunts followed by a deafening explosion.

A spear of panic pierces your pounding heart. Why does it have to be Kix? Any other clone--hell, any other 501st trooper--would be better than him.

Your feet slam into the barren wasteland as you push further into the battle. Troopers collapse all around you while clankers melt from blasters. No one is safe in this hellscape. Not man. Not machine. Not you.

You weave past the scattered soldiers, and some yell out to you in the haze.

“What are you doing?”

“Turn back now”.

“We can hold them off, fall back behind lines”.

“I told you not to do anything risky,” one voice rings clear in all the chaos. Footsteps fall in time with your own as you near the ray shields, now just ahead of you past the enemy defense.

“I’m following orders, Kix,” you wheeze. Your lungs scream for air as you duck out of the way of an onslaught of blaster shots. “Something you seem all too familiar with,” you say through gritted teeth.

“Why did you volunteer for this,” Kix hissed over his shoulder. He raises his gun to help his brother clear a path for the three of you to infiltrate the enemy’s inner lines.

With a haggard grunt, Jesse throws a shock grenade towards the surrounding droids to clear the last of the blockade. “If you haven’t noticed,” he yells, “we’re a bit preoccupied. Finish this spat when we’re in the next system, far away from this shit”.

Unable to tell if the surge of determination coursing through your veins comes from Kix’s words or the sight of possible victory, you break from the two troopers to push ahead. “I need you to flank my sides,” you say into your comlink, “we’re nearly to the center, and I’ll be able to set up the explosives. I just need you to keep the fire off of me”.

“Ten-four,” Jesse responds.

Through the roar of war, the static of your comlink rings in your ears. Filling you with dread, you hit it a few times to make sure it’s not broken.

“Kix?” you question. A gnawing pit of anxiety bubbles in your stomach when met with static. “Jesse,” you try the other channel, “Is Kix with you?”

Your skin tingles when you step through the shield barrier. Scanning the area, your eyes lock onto the target control area and power supplies. You sprint towards the control panel first, and you fumble with the protective plate before connecting the first explosive.

“What?” he asked in confusion. You hear heavy gunfire crackle through mixed with the trooper’s strained breathing. “No,” Jesse pushes out, “Saw him break off to your West when you gave the command. East generator is cleared”.

Each step you take to the East power supply is met with no resistance. With just a few strides, you reach the generator and connect the explosive to its side. Shifting your weight, you push off and run to the West generator. As blasters and explosive shells ring in your ears, your heart pounds. Prickles of fear sting your skin. He has to be there.

“Right behind you,” Jesse shouts, “Heard anything from Kix?”

“Radio silence,” you yell over your shoulder. When you face forward again, the fog billows and folds over itself as some of the enemy land cruisers shoot off into the distance. This could be it. At the thought of reaching the last moments of battle, you attach the last explosive and grab the detonator from your utility belt. Jesse stands tall as he shoots down any stray droid emerging from the shield barrier. With a click, you sync the charges and motion Jesse to move out.

“Kix, meet at the West cliff cave. The charges are set and prepped,” you shout into your comlink over the battle’s cacophony. Once again, only static hums in response. You shoot Jesse a look of confusion. Your com channels work fine, even with the frequency interference, so why was Kix suddenly unreachable? Is he really that petty to ignore com calls after our last conversation? You scoff and duck behind one of the boulder stacks inside the cave. Your heart pounds against its cage as you look over to Jesse on the other side.

“Have you gotten through to that idiot,” you shout with a shaky voice.

Jesse taps the side of his bucket a few times. “No,” his words slowly come out as he thinks, “But those droids will be getting close to the charges by now. I don’t think we can spare him anymore time”.

“What if he gets caught in the blast? We have to wait for him,” your response tumbles without thought from your chapped lips.

“We have a job to do,” Jesse reminds you as he tilts his head. “Kix is smart. He knows about the charges, and he won’t do something reckless”.

You bite your lip and look at the detonator in your hand. A cold wave of uncertainty wash over you that stings your skin with the scorching blood coursing through your veins.

“Why are you hesitating? Set them off now, or we’ll all be in trouble,” Jesse yells. Panic pushes past his usually cool demeanor.

Your thumb presses down on the small button, and you shut your eyes as a deafening whirlwind overcomes the chaos. A powerful gust of wind pushes through the cave’s entry way bringing flames and debris with it. The heat swelters around you and constricts your lungs. Sweat drips across your skin. You try to steady your haggard breathing, but the smoke lingering in the air burns the inside of you with each inhale.

“Status report,” a static voice faintly calls out. Its location seems to bounce through the cave, and you can barely register it above the ringing in your ears.

“Jesse,” you call out. A cough accompanies your hoarse voice. Slowly rising to a standing position, you lean against the wall to your side. The world sways underneath your feet, which only makes your head spin harder.

“Over here,” a similar voice coughs from where you last saw your squad mate. “You alright?”

Your comlink chirps, and you carefully nod your head. “Probably. You?”

“Been through worse”. Without warning, a beam of light breaks through the smoke and fog settling around the two of you. “We’re alright, Rex,” Jesse explains through the shared channel. “Lost Kix though when we broke off to clear the surrounding area near the generators”.

“We’ll keep an eye out for him, but he’s probably already at the temp medbay. Hurry over and get checked out. We’re trying to evac ASAP. This place is making everyone uneasy, and it’s time for well deserved R-and-R”.

Your stomach lurches with your first step away from the wall. As your heart plummets, the sense of uncertainty freezes into dread, and your knees buckle. Rex didn’t know where Kix was?

“Hey- hey,” Jesse shouts your name and rushes over to you. Just as you’re about to sink into the ground, his arms catch you and hold you up. “Kriffssake, you look like you’ve just seen a ghost”.

“I need to find Kix,” you say in a rush. Everything feels sharp to the touch as you try to pull yourself away from Jesse. “Something's not right. We need to find him”.

Jesse’s arms tighten around you as he guides your struggling form out of the hiding spot into the remnants of the battlefield. “What’s gotten into you,” he huffs. “The two of you were just arguing in the middle of an onslaught of blasterfire, and now you’re worried about him?”

An unexplainable instinct urges you to try to fight out of Jesse’s hold, but your aching muscles only want to sink into his arms. Kix may be insufferable, but he follows orders. Regardless of who gives them. “Jesse, I’m telling you- there’s something wrong. Kix isn’t okay”.

“Even if he isn’t okay-which he’s not- why do you care so much all of the sudden?” Jesse prods as he pushes you past the rubble and heaps of scrap metal.

“I’ve always cared,” you nearly shout in frustration. Your body screams in pain as you continue to shift and throw your weight to break free. Even when the ARC trooper’s hold softens, he still keeps you from running off in search of…him. What is Kix exactly? A crush is too childish for the deep respect and admiration you hold for the medic. Friend is nowhere close to describing your teasing and heated relationship. The only word that comes to mind to describe the man -- who has soft, inviting eyes and a smirk you just want to wipe away with a kiss -- would be lover. An agonized groan rumbles in your chest as you fling your body weight completely forward. “You’re not listening,” you practically scream.

“Enough,” Jesse shouts and pulls you tight into his chest as the pair of you walk through the beginnings of the Republic camp. The plastoid armor digs into your back and knocks the wind out of your chest. “Coric,” he shouts, “need you check this one out. We took in a lot of smoke and might have some minor burns”. Stares from just about everyone in the camp lock onto the two of you. A tangle of collected calmness and frantic fighting.

Before Coric can even ask what happened, you beat him to the first word: “Where’s Kix?” Nausea rocks your stomach as Coric takes you in with a careful look.

“Wasn’t he with you,” he slowly inquires. A crease of confusion digs across his forehead as his gaze flickers between you and Jesse.

At his words, you feel Jesse simultaneously lock up and loosen his grip on you. With weak knees suddenly trying to support you, you almost wish he would hold you tighter with the news. Silence settles between the three of you with an unspoken understanding. Kix never reported for medical duty. Neither his commanding officer or his medical chief knew where he was.

“Think you can hold on a little longer,” Jesse nervously asks, looking at you.

“Didn’t even want to be here in the first place. We need to find Rex and the general,” you reply and nod.

Jesse wraps one arm around you to support you and pushes the two of you to walk faster. Dust clouds kick at your heels with each determined step. You’re going to find Kix, bring him home, and give him hell for everything he’s put you through.

Maneuvering through the aisles of cots and further into the camp, you see Rex and Anakin stand around a makeshift command table. Datapads and a small hologram console crowd the table as the two men speak in tense, hushed tones. Both wear a grave expression that does nothing to hide their concern.

“Rex,” both you and Jesse call out in a rush. Feeling the subtle tremors shifting his armor, you wrap your arm around Jesse to pull him into your side. Both of you lean into each other. Ragged breaths rise and fall from your aching chests. The two of you hold each other up as the commanding officers face you and take a sharp inhale. A choked sound of protest tears at your throat.

“Rex,” Jesse tries again. Anger flares underneath his skin and continues to stoke his anxiety when his ori’vod won’t look him in the eye. His lip curls into a snarl. “Where’s Kix?” he growls.

Jesse’s body twitches underneath your touch, and you find yourself pulling him back as he tries to take a step towards the general and captain. Holding him back, you press your feet into the ground to try to do the same for yourself.

If it comes down to it, neither of you are concerned about stopping the other from running anymore. Now in agreement that something is terribly wrong, both of you are prepared to even give the commanding officers hell if needed to find Kix. The two of you try to give the others the benefit of the doubt that whatever consequence the mission’s success brings, it has nothing to do with Kix’s absence.

General Skywalker exhales a deep breath as he turns to the holo-console. With a press of a button, shaky helmet-cam footage from the battle plays in front of you accompanied by Kix’s shouts. “Always calling the shots, huh,” Kix mutters under his breath before following with, “Copy”. Your eyes flicker from where you disappear out of sight from the holograph to the West power generator that shows up a few moments later.

“Just has to have the last word, kriffsake,” Kix mutters. His helmet scans the area as he approaches the West generator. “Maybe you should come down from your throne and walk amongst the common people for a day. Nothing’s fucking good enough to you,” Kix spits out. His boot kicks a rock tumbling as he rounds the corner to clear the area. “Instead of thinking you’re all knowing, try looking in the mirror. I bet you’d shatter at the sight of your reflection. A person who’s so desperate to prove their worth to others that they insert themselves where they aren’t needed. Even when it puts their life at risk,” he groans and hits the side of his helmet with his fist. The generator hums quietly as the battle rumbles around him, but the area is void of any life. No rubble littering the coarse dirt and rocks. Not a single stray piece of metal or plastoid lurks in the mist. No immediate threats to pull Kix out of his spiraling thoughts. “Calling me a coward when they’d rather sacrifice their life, so they can die a hero rather than fight another day to be a better person”.

Kix’s words knock the wind out of you, and you stagger a step backward. Bumping into Jeese, your chest aches as you choke on your breathing. Dust and realization sting your ears as tears prick at your lash line while you watch Kix check the boulder mass just beyond the generator. As he approaches the obstacle, a blunt impact crashes into his helmet causing the footage to fizzle through static snippets. His com connection cuts in and out as Kix’s shout of surprise quickly turns into noises of combat. Until the hologram fades into the table, and you’re left with his words echoing in your head.

As if a cord has snapped, you feel as if you’re disconnected from reality. Your body feels like it weighs nothing while you do everything to balance the crippling fear trying to push you to your knees. General Skywalker and Captain Rex’s voices sound like they’re systems away even though you could reach out with your hand to either of them at the moment.

The only thought cycling through your head -- the only thought that burns itself into your memory -- is how Kix is missing and he thinks you're a coward.

At least that’s something the two of you could agree on.

You pull your gaze from the holoconsole and look Rex dead in the eyes. Rather than the collected captain you’ve worked with so often, Rex’s apprehensive expression and concerned eyes further stoke the rising flame of determination that courses through you. The sensitive pinpricks that sting your skin heighten the sensation of breaking through your consciousness’s fog.

“So, how are we going to bring Kix back home?” you demand. The finality of your words rings clear through the camp, and the four of you share a look of mutual agreement. None of you would be returning to the Resolute without the medic.

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postsofbabel · 7 months

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#posts of babel

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toomanybandstocare · 1 year

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hi friend! so excited for this exchange. could I request a kix x reader where the reader finds out about him going MIA from the stasis, already established relationship? thank you <3

{Come Home to Me}

Program: Kix always keeps his promises to you, especially when he says he'll come home. Never once has he left you feeling uneasy about your relationship, yet something makes you hold onto him longer one morning when he needs to leave for deployment. Only for his ori'vod to return to your home with shattering news.

Pairing: Kix x GN! Reader, established relationship

Side Pairing: Rex & GN! Reader, platonic

Genre: Fluff -> Angst

Length: 998w (seeee? I can keep to a word limit hehe)

Warnings: Pet names (Cy'are & Cy'arika), Bye bye Kix, Probs not accurate to stasis arc but in my defense i haven't seen it yet

Counselor Notes: Requested by my lovely friend @ahsokastechie <3 So happy to do this lil fic swap with you. BUT ALSO THIS GIF OF HIM IS SO SOFT IM SOBBING AND YELLING INTO MY PILLOW.

Camp Resolute's Masterlist

Camper Tags: @staygoldwriting @wizardofrozz (cause ik you love our boy)

A cool chill settles across your body as a warm glow begins to illuminate Courescant’s skyline. Gentle kisses trail across your cheekbone as wandering hands pull you closer into your lover’s chest. Your hands run across Kix’s bare chest, and a soft sigh falls from the man’s lips. His breath tickles your skin, and he presses his face into the crook of your neck.

“Don’t go,” you plead.

Kix’s heart shatters. His arms squeeze you tighter. Already awake for some time now, Kix wanted to spend his remaining hours hidden from the galaxy, tucked away at home with the love of his life. His breath shudders, and he rests his forehead on yours. “As long as I have a home to return to,” Kix says and looks softly into your eyes, “nothing will keep me away from you. There is never a moment I don’t search for comfort in a memory we have created together. We have a lifetime to foster our love and start our family. As long as my heart beats, it will beat for you”.

Meeting his golden gaze, you breath hitches. Mere moments from returning to war, Kix lays beside you with an adoring gaze as the sunrises outside the window behind him. You reach out to hold his cheek in one palm, and your heart swells as he leans into your gentle touch to then press a kiss to the inside of your wrist. Kix takes hold of your hand and keeps them connected above your hearts.

“You’ll always have a home with me, Kix,” you promise. “There’s only one person I imagine waking up beside every morning. One person who I dream of every night to keep me company even when we’re systems apart. Know that when you leave, you take my entire heart with you, because it belongs to no one else”.

Neither of you know who shed the first tear, but you take your hand from his to carefully wipe away the few he shares with you just as he reaches to do the same. Bodies and souls forever connected since the moment your gazes met. Anyone who witnesses your shared, tender love recognizes the two of you as soulmates.

After a few more moments of peace, Kix finally braves what’s beyond his safe place. Pulling away from your embrace, Kix’s heart lurches as you continue to hold onto him. He presses a lingering kiss to your temple and eases your hands to hold onto his pillow. Kix leaves your shared bedroom, and he quickly runs through the shower. He takes the time to mentally prepare himself and shake off the uneasy feeling churning inside him as he uses your body wash to relax.

It’s only what seems like seconds after he stepped out of bed that you pad quietly behind Kix to the apartment’s entryway. Your bodies find eachother once more as the two of you hug each other, neither wanting to be the first to pull away. Your well-loved sleep shirt catches on his well-worn blue armor as the pair of you sway.

“I’ll be back before you can even miss me,” Kix reassures you. He presses a soft kiss to your lips that’s followed by another. A few more quick kisses soon follow after that make you laugh.

When he grabs his helmet from the entry table and takes the step away towards the door, a cold wave of uncertainty washes over you. “I miss you,” you weakly laugh with tears threatening to fall.

Kix, with a similar expression, smiles sadly: “I’ll be home soon, cy’arika, and we’ll be able to celebrate our anniversary”.

“I’ll count down the days, love. Stay safe and come home, Kix”.

“I promise”.

As the door slides shut, you wrap your arms around yourself unable to shake off the sinking feeling overcoming you.

Nothing out of the ordinary stopped you from entering or exiting through that door in the cycles to come. You went about your life the best you could, even with the gnawing unease. Friends came and went to hang out nights in. Family popped in and out to check in with you.

Until the day you open the door, ready to go shopping to prepare for your anniversary, and you nearly run into Captain Rex who stands with his bucket securely at his side with his hand ready to knock.

Everything stands still as you stare at your boyfriend’s commanding officer. The air wraps around you in a thick blanket, and your knees wobble. “He’s not dead,” you seethe. Yet, you weren’t angry. How could you be angry at the man who looks at you with an understanding expression.

Rex’s heart breaks while he watches you bravely face what you thought was your worst fear. He presses his lips in a firm line and thinks of what to tell you. Orders came through to share what would be easiest to hear. Even the general is concerned about how the 501st’s sweetheart would handle the news, and he thought it better to give closure. Standing before you and bearing witness to a side only shared with his brother, Rex steps towards you and rests his helmet on the entry table.

“We don’t know,” Rex softly admits.

“You have lists,” you quickly deflect, “of every fallen brother. Kix will not become just a name on some casualty count. He won't become another number. He’s coming home”. Your voice shakes as you try to hold onto reality.

Rex shuts his eyes tight for a moment, “Kix has gone missing in action, cy’are”.

When he opens his eyes, Rex witnesses you break before him. He quickly takes you into his arms and holds you close as you beat your fist down on his faded, blue armor. Your sobs drown Rex’s soft condolences and promises to do whatever he can to support you.

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toomanybandstocare · 1 year

Text

{Galaxy's Edge}

Program: Everything is too much. The war. The pressure. The responsibilities. It all pushes you to the edge, and you teeter. Just a moment away from leaving it all to try to find a semblance of peace from the raging emotions that overwhelm you. Duty bound by his medical oaths and love, Kix is by your side and knows exactly how to talk you down.

Pairing: Kix x GN! Reader, established relationship

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Length: 1529w

Warnings: Anxieties and Insecurities

Camp Resolute's Masterlist

ClonexReader Masterlist

Prompt: "Stop right there"

Counselor Notes: May or may not have taken out my emotions out on this one. But! Happy to post my first piece for @clonexreaderbingo.

Your head pounds with a searing, dull throb. The blue illumination from your datapad burns your eyes in the darkness of your temporary sleeping quarters. Always the first to offer any assistance to Senator Organa, you often find yourself working until the night sky begins to bleed into morning light. Only to fall asleep for what seems like minutes before you wake up to start the cycle again. This bill and the current state of affairs causes your stomach to knot and twist. Even the ever collected senator looks ragged during your meetings.

Once graduated from Alderaan’s Academy of Political Science, you began working for the senator’s office and have started your career as an aide in hopes of one day serving your people in the footsteps of your mentor. As the war continues to rage on and has even come to your home, this will be the defining moment of the start of your career. Responsibilities normally handled by a representative now stack on top of your pre-existing assignments. The boundary between the two roles blur and encompass you completely as you take on the work of two people. Helping the senator with the upcoming vote to send reinforcements to Christophsis, the two of you meet three times a day during meals to divide research needs during this prolonged voyage.

With the Separatist blockade surrounding your planet, the 50st underwent a stealth operation to help the senator and his companions escape to Coruscant. The reality of the situation weighs heavily on your achy shoulders. Pushing from your makeshift desk with a shake of your head, you stand on wobbly legs. With a few steps, the door hisses open at your approach. A gnawing guilt eats at the back of your mind as you wander the ship’s narrow corridors. All your efforts and time should be spent on your assignments, but the short distance between you and your secret lover teases you mercilessly.

Rounding the corner, you find most of the boys in blue enjoying a scarce moment of peace. A poor retelling of Hardcase’s last attempt at romance bringing most of the boys into a fit of controllable laughter or looks of utter disbelief. You lean on the wall with a soft smile enjoying the sight of Kix laughing without a care in the galaxy as he covers his eyes to try to shield himself from his brother’s disaster. Wiping away a stray tear, Kix’s amber eyes immediately find you and soften. A flurry takes flight in your stomach as you steal this moment between you two.

Kix addresses you with a warm regard that snaps the others into a flurry, trying to find a balance between respecting your status while keeping the casual atmosphere alive. “Is there anything we can do to help you?” Kix respectfully asks. His eyes quickly scan over your curled frame. His forehead creases at the sight of fatigue settling on you, and he’s careful to keep his emotions hidden from prying eyes.

“I was wondering if you had any spare headache pills?” you ask. Even trying to keep your voice from shaking proves to be a struggle. The butterflies in your stomach mix poorly with the lightheaded haze clouding your mind. “I ran out earlier today, and I still have quite a bit of work to finish before my dinner meeting with the senator”.

Without a second thought, Kix pushes off his seat, which pulls amused looks and a stray chuckle from his brothers. “Of course. I just need to grab them from my medkit. I can bring them to your room if you’d like to go ahead and try to get some rest”.

Not sparing his brothers a glance, Kix leads the two of you back through the corridor towards the sleeping quarters. When one of your shaky hands slips into one his by his side, a pang of nerves stings his heart. Kix quickly squeezes your hand. Once the two of you reach the travel barracks, Kix reaches just past the door frame to grab his kit. The pair of you hurry to your room. After the door hishes close behind you, Kix’s mind races into overtime at the sound of your muffled sobs and drops his kit to the floor.

“I can’t keep doing this,” you choke out.

“What’s wrong?” Kix calmly asks you. His large hands guide you to sit on the edge of the bed. Kneeling on the ground by your side, Kix softly palms your thigh. His normally warm eyes cloud with concern as they flicker across your trembling body. Kix keeps himself calm, knowing that his nerves and concerns won’t combine well.

“This,” you hiss and throw one hand in the air, gesturing to the room in general. “War. Politics. Secrets. Running for my life. I can’t keep doing this. I’m not strong enough,” your voice breaks. Ducking your head, you squeeze your eyes shut. Tears sting your lash line before falling down your cheeks. Your heart races almost pushing his way out of its cage and up your throat. You try to take deep breaths, but they come out short and forced. “I just wanted to help my people and the war efforts, but I didn’t think I’d get caught in a web of blackmail. Everything’s too much. I just want to run from it all. Disappear and start new where no one can find me. It wouldn’t hurt anyone if I did”. You pinch the bridge of your nose with one hand, the other sits limply in your lap. “Senator Organa can easily find a replacement. My friends and family will just think I’m too ashamed to show my face from failing them. You can find someone that you can be proud to have by your side and call your lover”. As you fall further into your anxieties, your words come out rushed.

“Stop right there”.

It takes a moment for his words to register in his mind. Kix doesn’t recognize his own voice - coming out a low growl. His head spins as he tries to keep up with your plan. “Look at me,” Kix quietly demands, leaving no room for argument. At the hesitant flash of your gaze before it drops with your hand, Kix squeezes your thigh. “Please,” he breathes out.

Dizzy and hiccuping, you slowly raise your head to meet his gaze. Even with a serious expression, his eyes are full of care. You rest one hand on top of his and tangle your fingers. His other hand grasps your arm and rubs soothing patterns into your scorching skin.

“I can’t understand the stress you're under. Or how terrifying this escape has been,” Kix calmly starts. His voice no louder than a low murmur. Careful to not let anyone overhear this private moment. “If you were to disappear - no message, no coordinates, nothing - so many people would search for you. With me leading the efforts”. Kix’s gaze flickers across your puffy face and softens when they meet your red-rimmed, tired eyes. “I would be broken if you left. No one can come close to you. Not in the joy you bring to others by your kind acts. Not in the passion you have for helping those in your community. No one can do what you do. And especially not in the way you complete me”.

“Kix,” you whimper. Your lip wobbles from his tender care and attention to detail.

“I love you,” Kix assures you. His hands squeeze you before he carefully pulls you down into his lap to cradle you to his chest. “There is no other person in the galaxy I know who can persevere through this war and make the future a brighter place full of hope. I am so incredibly proud of how far you’ve come as a person and what you’ve accomplished so far with your work. I know I’m not always by your side when you need me most, but I will do everything I can to support you however I can”. Kix kisses your temple before he rests his forehead there. “Whenever you feel like this again, please, send a signal to my comlink channel. I’ll find somewhere private - no matter where I am - and call you. And, when I feel the same, I’ll do the same”.

You move your head to rest your forehead against his. “I love you,” you softly whisper. Leaning into his embrace, you match the rise and fall of his chest, slowing your breathing. “We can figure this out. Together”.

“You’re not alone in this. We’ll get through this together,” Kix promises. His lips ghost over yours before pressing a tender kiss. Slowly moving together, the two of you melt into the other. Feeling your arms wrap around his neck and lightly dig your nails into the edge of his buzzcut, Kix hums. His thoughts begin to cloud, so Kix breaks away from you. At the small whine he pulls from your lips, he gently laughs. Kix moves his hands to cup your face and deeply look into your eyes. “Promise me?”

You press a kiss to the inside of his wrist and match his fond expression. “Promise”.

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toomanybandstocare · 9 months

Note

summer of fun: I’d love to see who you ship me w romantically!!

₊‧°𐐪♡𐑂°‧₊ - Summer of Fun

Who I would ship you with plus a little drabble. @starboytech requested a romantic pairing. thank you for celebrating with me!!! Hope to talk soon but I know we're both busy bees rn <3

Pairing: Medic Kix x Linguist, GN! Reader

Genre: Fluff

Length: 859w + 232w

Counselor Notes: Similar to my other ship posts, I tried to tailor this around our chats. I hope you enjoy <3 Sorry if it's a lil all over the place, I'm v tired but wanted to share.

-> Celebration Announcement Post <- -> Celebration Masterlist <- -> Camp Resolute Masterlist <-

Sunset drips through the wall of glass as you drag your feet across tile flooring. Knots pull at your neck as tension chains your shoulders into a hunched posture. Your book bag weighs down on you as you tiredly fumble through books, datapads, and scattered papers. Inevitably, your keys seem to always hide themselves from you on the days where you desperately just need to tumble into your apartment with ease.

Cool metal tingles against the pads of your fingertips just as a searing pain flashes across your skull. From sunup to nearly sundown, you’ve been in the archives trying to make progress on your linguistic research. When the foreign alphabet began to swim in front of your dry eyes off the ancient pages, you knew it was time to head home.

Haphazardly tapping the fob to the door’s lock sensor, you squeeze your eyes shut as the warning beep chimes. Please don’t let this be the day your key dies. You had been meaning to get a replacement, but time alluded you due to deadlines and presentations. Your chest constricts, and your throat tightens as tears sting your lash line. You hold the fob over the sensor with a frustrated groan that’s interrupted by the door phishing open.

“Come here,” Kix gently calls to you. His caring hands softly reach out to take the key from your white-knuckled grip and rest on your hips to guide you home. “I know today’s not the day either of us wants to deal with security, so let’s skip that altogether, hm?” he jokes.

Kix’s voice washes over you like an ocean tide. Easing the tension locking your body and soothing the flaming emotions licking at your skin, his voice brings a calmness that washes over you. The two of you crowd the small entryway as Kix moves behind you to place your bag and coat on their rack hooks. His hands rest on your hips, and he rubs small circles over your clothing as he guides you into your apartment.

Completely ready to fall onto your couch and beg Kix for takeaway, your bottom lip wobbles when he turns you to enter the bedroom. “Kix, can we please just relax on the couch? I don’t want to take another step if I don’t have to,” you plead.

A blanket of relief falls over you when the two of you stop for a moment. Leaning against his chest, you try to hold yourself steady on aching legs. Suddenly Kix’s body drops into a crouch as your stomach plummets when he collects you in his arms to hold you close. Your heart races, sending a warm flush across your cheeks.

“That’s not what you need right now,” Kix pushes back. Walking through the doorway, Kix brings you in front of your shared bed and you nearly sob at the sight. A fresh set of sheets lays pressed over the bed with both of your favorite pajamas resting neatly on the end corner. A basket with a new blanket, comfort treats, cozy candles, and a few novels sits just behind the clothing piles. “You need a little extra care, a night to just burrow in with all your favorite things, and a chance to relax and recharge,” Kix quietly explains. Pressing a gentle kiss to the crown of your head, he walks to the edge of the bed and places you on the plush mattress.

His hands cup your cheeks, and your chest swells. Wrapping your arms around his waist, you lean your head against his body. His chuckle rumbles underneath you, and Kix rests one hand on your shoulders as the other runs across your head. “You didn’t have to go through all this trouble for me,” you mumble. “I’m sure you’re exhausted from studying today as well”.

“Tired sure,” Kix responds barely above a whisper as he feels you press closer to him. He feels your breathing slow and deepen underneath his touch. “Caring for you is never a trouble, cyar’ika. One of my favorite aspects of being in a relationship is that we’re partners in life. Experiences and emotions are shared between us, and they won’t always come from fond memories. We’ll get through the days that seem to never end, because we’re able to lean on each other for support. I’m always going to be here for you, so let me take care of you and support you, mesh’la”.

As if the weight’s been taken off your shoulders, you collapse in relief against him and tighten your arms around him. You jerk your head in a nod. Unable to trust yourself to speak, you peer up at him with a grateful smile. An ache grows in your chest from how full your heart feels, and Kix looks down at you with a soft look of adoration. All the day’s frustrated pain melts away from you in a single moment.

At the end of the day, the only thing that matters is that you have your partner to support you through life. Through all the tears, restless nights, never ending days - it’s just the two of you by each others’ sides.

You are determined to make your dreams become something you can live everyday. Putting in the time and dedication to achieve your goals, you are a grounded individual who won’t let anyone come in the way of your success.

Kix holds a similar passion for his work and expertise. Even when he’s off duty or on shore leave, he tries to research the latest medical improvements and different treatment options. He is dedicated to his craft, and he prides himself in being able to respond to emergencies using a combination of natural remedies and medical technologies.

It’s as if the two of you move in perfect harmony. Between your personal goals and spending time with each other, you two have been able to balance your responsibilities and relationship with grace. Your lives blend naturally, and it’s as if you’ve always been by each other’s side.

With such drive and determination, you can find your attention solely focusing on your duties and responsibilities at times. It happens to Kix as well, but he’s able to take a moment to reevaluate the situation a little easier from his battle experiences. He never wants you to feel as if he doesn’t support you, so Kix will gently pull you back with an act of kindness. Something to help you ease back into reality and relax from the mental exertion of focusing on something so intensely.

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