#need to and to not be disabled or immunocompromised. what makes me fucking furious is we decided to throw all the people who don’t have

[pepprs]

genuinely so angry and scared im shaking. how many other times this week this month this year have i been exposed without knowing it. do people even tell each other anymore. it’s just so grim. it’s so fucking grim

#purrs #delete later #covid19 #i am fighting for my fucking life every day to stay safe and to keep the people around me some of whom are disabled / chronically ill / #immunocompromised / medically vulnerable safe. i am fucking fighting for my life. it’s already hard that i am usually one of two people in #any given room still wearing a mask let alone an n95 mask. hard and bad enough that we get looks for wearing masks and people think im crazy #for my life still being on hold and for my family still basically never going anywhere. ITS FUCKING WORSE that we are still very much in the #throes of all of it and we are in constant physical and quite frankly EXISTENTIAL danger not only of getting sick / becoming (more) #disabled / literally fucking dying but also returning to the absolute hell of lockdown which while important was psychologically damaging in #ways that are difficult to even articulate. like not only have we as a society decided to not give a shit about unpacking all of that and #healing from the trauma and assuming everyone went through the same thing when we very much did not and to just send everybody back to #school and work because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 but we have ALSO decided to pretend like the freakish unceasing danger just doesn’t exist #anymore and to get rid of every tool we had available to keep us safe or at minimum make people have to pay exorbitant amounts of money to #access them because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 !!!!!!! im TIRED. im so fucking tired of it. i am so fucking exhausted and angry and scared. and i #HAVE the luxury and privilege of being able to afford n95 masks and covid tests and to be able to work a job that i can do remotely if i #need to and to not be disabled or immunocompromised. what makes me fucking furious is we decided to throw all the people who don’t have #that access or privilege under the fucking bus and forget about them lol. but what do you expect from a country rotten to its core the way #it is lol. im fucking despondent. why are we living in an incinerator. #* the lockdown(s) werent just important they were necessary. and arguably we should have another one even though if we do i genuinely fear #for my mental health both during and afterwards and quite frankly before. im tired. i am grateful for the life i live which has resulted in #part from the different things that have happened because of the pandemic but i also so desperately wish this never happened and every day I #think about what life would be like if it hadn’t happened. the grief of it all is unspeakably big.

[lizbian]

you know i gotta ask all those questions for the thuvia crew, if youre able

1. A little-known talent of your OC?

Alexis enjoys bookbinding as a hobby. He’s probably upholstered a couple journals for Aster for birthdays.Bivir, among the Metias tribe, was a hunter - they’re a skilled marksperson and it’s hardly ever seen, now that they’re in Thuvia.Damien plays the oud - he’s still learning, really.Solange is, while not masterful, practiced at parkour. She initially learned it to better evade her father.Vita derives great satisfaction from her skill at calligraphy.

2. What trait does your OC like best about themself? (Eyes, guitar skills, random bird facts, etc)

Alexis doesn’t particularly like much about himself, but values his honor.Bivir loved their hands. They’ve got long, graceful elven fingers, cute birthmarks on the palms, soft enough to be pleasant for a lover but hard enough not to hurt easily, and they are capable and deft - but they need to reassess this as things stand now.Damien likes how good he is at makeup - he’s an expert at winged eyeliner, just like his (late) father was. (According to the portraits)Solange is proudest of her achievements as a spellblade - no matter how much they’re biting her in the ass.Vita likes her obstinacy - once she settles on a goal, she doesn’t let go.

3. How many pillows does your OC sleep with?

Alexis sleeps with like, seven. Some of which are rather large. He practically entombs himself in pillows.Bivir would mostly rather sleep cuddled up to a friend or lover, sleeping sorta on them, their head on the side of whoever’s chest and their arm around them. If that’s unavailable, two pillows.Damien sleeps with three pillows, practically sitting up. Solange sleeps with one pillow, out of habit. Vita doesnt sleep.

4. Is your OC good at keeping secrets?

Alexis wears his heart on his sleeve, but will never tell verbally/ Bivir is extremely good at keeping secrets, and equally good at making sure no one suspects they have any in the first place.Damien keeps secrets, but mostly out of anxiety. Solange keeps so many secrets.Vita doesn’t much care for it, but keeps secrets.

5. Your OC’s worst habit?

eh fuc this im tired

6. Does your OC prefer tennis shoes/sneakers or flip flops?

Alexis - sneakersBivir - flip floopsDamien - converseSolange - sneakrersVita  -flip flops

7. What is your OC’s opinion on body modifications?

Alexis is SO INTO THEM.Bivir is very into them, and would like to get more.Damien is also another who approves of them.Solange likes ones that are easily undone and redone, like hair dye, but doesn’t like them with permenacy.Vita is neutral to them, despite having a few of her own.

8. Your OC is given a full-ride scholarship to any college they could want to go to. Where do they go and what do they major in?

I literally couldnt care less abt this question so im not answering it.

9. What chore does your OC hate the most?

Alexis hates dusting very much, since his breathing is dubious on the best of days.Bivir isn’t fond of cleaning anything related to bathroom actions - they’re a little squeamish in that way.Damien has never done a chore in his damn life.Solange hates clearing the forge.Vita dislikes making beds.

10. Would your OC prefer to live in the city, the suburbs, or the country?

Alexis is a suburban boy, but he’d find living in the city very convenient. Bivir was raised in a hunter-gatherer community, and likes the compromise between that and city that they’ve noticed in the suburbs.Damien is a city boy, and would like to experience all the other ways of life.Solange couldn’t imagine not living in the city.Vita doesn’t care where she is, so long as shes with friends.

11. Is your OC a blanket hog?

Alexis isn’t a blanket hog, but he’d be the sort of person to try and preemptively discourage blanket hogging by having separate blankets for everyone in the bed.Bivir isn’t a blanket hog unless they’re having a nightmare.Damien is totally a blanket hog. He wakes up swaddled every morning.Solange doesn’t use blankets in the first place. Vita doesn’t sleep.

12. Would your OC play by the rules in a fight or take cheap shots?

Alexis is very good at rules. It’s part of his honor.Bivir isn’t afraid to fight dirty.Damien doesn’t care about the rules. Or know them.Solange plays by her own rules.Vita is a fucking necromancer, which is regarded by all as a cheap shot.

13. Does your OC have a widow ’s peak?

Alexis does not.Bivir does.Damien does not.Solange does.Vita does not.

14. Happy birthday! What kind of present would your OC want?

Alexis would like something handmade or heartfelt.Bivir would like to receive flowers, but that’s unfortunately not possible since they’re born in the middle of February. They’re happy about cute pastel clothes, though.Damien’s never got a birthday present before.Solange is very fond of jewelry or shoes - or materials with which she can make herself more jewelry.Vita likes getting books!

15. Something that grosses your OC out?

Alexis is emetophobic.Bivir is disgusted by bathroom smells. Damien is grossed out by the smell of cooked vegetables. Despite this, he is vegetarian.Solange hates the smell of blood.Vita was very disgusted at the sight of severed fingers on the floor.

16. Your OC is suddenly on an adventure! Where do they go and what do they do?

I think this will inevitably be spoilers.

17. Is there a real person that looks like your OC?

Alexis resembles Soo Joo Park but thats the only one i remember right now. Oh yeah also Solange resembles a young Meryl Streep.

18. Something that makes your OC laugh without fail?

Alexis enjoys having his own antics commented upon.Bivir is usually full of laughter and grins - it’s not hard.Damien giggles when he’s flattered.Solange enjoys crude jokes.Vita doesn’t laugh much, but enjoys knock knock jokes.

19. Something that makes your OC cry without fail?

Alexis cries when he is told he’s hated.Bivir only ever cries as a result of nightmaresDamien is an easy crier. Show him some baby animals.Solange doesn’t cry.Vita cannot cry.

20. A obscure/ridiculous fear your OC has?

spoilers

21. Does your OC have any type of disability, whether it be mental, physical, etc?

Alexis has bipolar + cptsd, was born missing his right arm, and is immunocompromised and has tuberculosis. Bivir has persistent nightmares, adhd and ptsd, and is now missing two fingers on their right hand (ring/pinky)Damien has the anxiety and cptsd.Solange has the depression and cptsdVita is a harder one to place because im not sure where inexperience ends and genuine difficulty begins.

22. Does your OC get frustrated when people forget to close the door behind themselves?

Alexis absolutely does.Bivir doesn’t care.Damien is impartial.Solange is furious.Vita doesn’t care.

23. What is your OC’s first memory?

Alexis’ first memory is languishing in bed.Bivir’s first memory is their mother’s first speech on how important they were, and how they were destined for great things, and then she gave them a little smooch on their baby forehead.Damien’s first memory is probably picking up a nice book.Solange’s first memory was probably receiving her first hammer from her dad.Vita’s first memory was being booted up for the first time by her creators.

24. Something you like that your OC would hate?

i started doing this but then it hurt my confidence so i stop

25. Your OC is going into battle/on a mission! What song is their anthem?

Alexis BivirDamienSolangeVita

26. Does your OC have good or bad posture?

Alexis’ posture varies on how good he feels - it’s a pretty reliable litmus test on his physical state.Bivir has a dancer’s posture.Damien has very bad posture.Solange has pretty good posture.Vita has average posture.

27. Most despicable thing your OC has ever done?

Alexis is committing massive fraud on multiple levels.Bivir probably broke a rich person’s leg once or twice as Direct Action.Damien once pointed a gun in the face of an innocent, even friendly, dwarf.Solange made a bad deal with a corrupt princess.Vita hasn’t done anything worse than study necromancy.

28. Is your OC a conspiracy theorist?

Alexis is not.Bivir is not.Damien absolutely is.Solange doesn’t have time for it.Vita would probably believe them.

29. Someone does something awful in front of your OC. How do they handle it?

Alexis arrests them, probably. Bivir files it away in their mind and impartially tries to find the best option.Damien shoots them if it’s at all warranted.Solange kicks their ass.Vita doesn’t care.

30. What is your OC’s favorite drink?

Alexis loves hot chocolate.Bivir loves amaretto sours.Damien enjoys red wine.Solange enjoys milkshakes.Vita doesn’t drink.

31. Does your OC prefer to sleep in a warm or cool area?

Alexis likes warmths.Bivir likes warmth.Damien likes warmth. Solange likes cold.Vita doesn’t sleep.

32. Would your OC like you if they met you?

Alexis definitely would.Bivir also definitely would.Damien would probably find my enthusiasm anxiety-inducing.Solange would like me well enough.Vita would like me well enough.

33. A song that reminds you of your OC?

Alexis - Somebody To Die ForBivir - Heal MeDamien -  Silent ScreamSolange - AdiaVita - Wicked Game

34. Is your OC a nail biter?

Alexis is.Bivir isn’t.Damien is. Solange isn’t.Vita isn’t.

35. What is your OC’s favorite quote?

meh

36. Your OC’s favorite fashion era? (20’s, 70’s, etc)

Alexis - 1920′sBivir 1970sDamien - 2000sSolange - 1990Vita - 1860

37. Does your OC get excited when they get mail?

Alexis is - the only person he knows who is afar is Astr.Bivir doesn’t get mail.Damien doesn’t get mail.Solange hates mail. Usually it’s taxes.Vita doesn’t get mail.

38. Random thunderstorm! How does your OC react?

Alexis watches from his window.Bivir dances in the rain, they don’t give a crap.Damien cries from fear.Solange doesn’t care.Vita is disappointed because she can’t recharge. 

39. A strange talent of your OC?

Alexis can write backwards and upside down at the same time.Bivir is very flexible and bend all the way back.Damien can disassemble a firearm in half a second.Solange can catch a fish with her bare hands.Vita can cook good despite having no sense of taste.

40. Assuming your OC doesn’t have them already, what superpower would they want? If they do already, would they change it, keep it, or get rid of it?

spoilers

41. Does your OC like/make puns?

Alexis doesn’t make many puns, but appreciates them.Bivir isn’t fluent enough in Common for it, but makes excellent puns in Elven.Damien is too nervous. What if someone doesn’t like them?Solange doesn’t really make puns.Vita doesn’t understand the appeal.

42. What kind of shampoo does your OC use?

Alexis uses lavender rosemary scented shampoo.Bivir does a rosewater rinse. Damien uses tea tree oil scented shampoo. Solange uses herbal shampoo.Vita doesn’t really bathe - mostly wipes herself down regularly. She occaisionally washes her hair out, and uses Alex’s shampoo to do so.

43. Your OC wakes up with a coin super glued to their forehead. How do they react?

Alexis probably cries.Bivir doesn’t notice until someone points it out.Damien assumes he did it, and does not leave his home, ever.Solange rips it off her forehead skin and all.Vita doesn’t care.

44. Can your OC sleep if there’s any kind of light?

Alexis cannot.Bivir can.Damien can.Solange cannot.Vita doesnt sleep.

45. What kind of self-esteem does your OC have?

Alexis has…. average self-esteem.Bivir has pretty good self-esteem.Damien has absolutely none.Solange has far too much self-esteem.Vita has little self-esteem.

46. A word that your OC can’t stand?

i dont really get hating words tbh so i couldnt say

47. Does your OC fold their clothes, hang them up, or just leave them in the basket/dryer?

Alexis doesnt do any of that - he’s a spoiled nobleman. Bivir hangs them up.Damien has never done any such thing.Solange folds her clothes.Vita drapes them on a chair in her room.

48. Would society call your OC a good guy or a bad guy? What would they say they are?

Alexis - a good guyBivir - depends on your view of potentially-violent anarchy.Damien - a rambunctious good guy.Solange - a good galVita - a bad guy

49. Your OC’s most prized possession?

thres probably spoilers here too. im sleepy

50. What is your OC’s happy place?

Alexis’ is being held by a close friend or family member. Bivir’s is on a dancefloor, but their ideal character growth is for it to become ‘safe in the arms of a lover’. Damien’s is at a shooting range.Solange doesn’t have one.Vita’s is the Adrieux manor library.

#asks #pathfinder tag