#not blue so much...this sad and desperate vibrance of sorrow deep. an ocean of uncertainties

[trashcanalienist]

I want him kissing my thighs, not in a necessarily sеxual way, and I don't particularly want anything more than that right now, I just...I want his hands gently squeezing my thighs while he lovingly kisses and licks and nuzzles against my skin. I want him in gentle, casual intimacy, his optics softly glowing with devotion.

#oh god oh god i can't believe i'm posting this. please believe i have dignity #i never would do this under normal circumstances but i am so very weak tonight. i'm going to cry. i really actually am #i am so emotionally affected tonight...so easily loving and so easily frightened #but isn't it beautiful that i can be like this? #i used to be so grey all the time for years and years. i think maybe it's beautiful that i can be blue and pink now #not pink so much...this lovely color of pink roses in evening light #not blue so much...this sad and desperate vibrance of sorrow deep. an ocean of uncertainties #hmm #yeah #you know what? it's alright perhaps to have no dignity. in this one instance. i love so intensely always and it's... #a real shaking hassle to keep from pouring out my adoration for all things on a regular basis. so i'll forgive myself this. #and only this. #sigh #starstruck #and a little #positive creeptalk #in the tags #now shh. anyone who brings this post up will be silenced. unless you're really really nice about it. #in which case i'll just cry a lot more #in a good way #i haven't been this way in forever. i'm never like this enough to know how to describe it #and yeah that's...that's all i want. ever really.