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promisenolies · 4 years

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A Writer Fed Up

I feel like this post/rant has been coming for a while. I realize that this might not be received well, but I guess that’s a risk I’m willing to take.

I’ve been encountering some interesting takes and comments around my work as of late. And I feel like it needs to be addressed on a few different fronts. And yes, I could have continued with my life ignoring all these issues, as most people who do these behaviors are likely just doing it for attention. But...I feel that these things need to be said, if not only to give voice to many other writers/content creators who feel similarly.

General points are as follows:

The first and simplest point to make is this: the fanfiction writers in your fandom write these pieces – 1. for FREE 2. for THEMSELVES because they feel a call to create something. They/We do not do this for YOU. The sense of entitlement some readers have is uncalled for. Unless you’re paying us for our work, your opinion is not needed. At all.

Comments and Kudos are the air we breathe as writers. We love when people appreciate our work, enjoy our work, and feel the need to let us know. HOWEVER, the comment section is not there for you to tell us how much you didn’t enjoy the piece. (see point 1)

Everyone has personal tastes, yes? I have particular things I won’t read/write and I take no offense to others who feel differently. Again though, if you come across work that does not sit well with you or that you don’t enjoy – stop reading. That’s it. Don’t leave a comment, don’t bitch on timelines, don’t send passive aggressive curious cat messages. Just leave it alone. It’s that simple. I have particular tastes, I know that. But I don’t shit on writers who fall outside of what I enjoy. Because WHY!? They—again—are creating content for themselves and those who want to read it. And they’re doing so for free under no obligation to make anyone happy. Including—surprise—you and me! So again – if you don’t like ABO, don’t read it. If you don’t like MCD, don’t read it. If you don’t like BDSM, don’t read it. If you don’t like something specifically don’t. read. it. I don’t know why this is so hard for readers to grasp.

Specific points are as follows:

I write vers/switch Jikook. That’s all I write. Yes, one-shots typically have only one role, but you’ll find a variety of who bottoms/tops in each of them. Claiming that I only wrote bottom Jimin fics after I was “called out” by some entitled person who didn’t care for my content is ridiculous. Especially considering the very first BTS piece I posted was Dressing Room Deviance which not only featured bottom Jimin – but it was also a VMinKook fic!

On that note. I can’t believe I even have to say this, but what I write is FICTION. As in, despite them taking after the likeness of real Jimin and real Jungkook at the end of the day they are characters or interpretations of them (in my canon fics). And as characters, I write their sexual roles as I see fit. Sometimes I feel like they’d enjoy bottoming, sometimes I feel like they’d like to top. (See general points 1 and 3)

But what really irritates me with this concerning fascination with sexual roles is that PEOPLE ARE MORE THAN SEX. Are you that incapable of understanding the complexities in human nature? Is it impossible for you to see them as multi-faceted and capable of multiple roles? Relationships are built on more than sex. I promise. And if you’re stuck in thinking otherwise, I greatly encourage you to speak with a professional about what healthy relationships are and what they look like. The sex is my work is ONE part of their relationship. There’s so much more going on behind it. Trust, humor, equality, love... If all you see in my work is the sex or if that’s all you can seem to bring yourself to comment on – quite honestly I don’t want you to read my stuff then. Because it’s CLEARLY over your head.

Implying that I have no experience in sexual relationships is honestly the most ludacris and laughable thing I’ve encountered to date. One can only DREAM of the level of satisfaction I have in my sex like with my spouse. (Sorry to my little if they end up seeing this LOL) And that satisfaction and experience is in the very thing you seem to think I don’t understand the mechanics of.

People’s inability to separate physical appearance, size, presentation, etc from their preconceived, heteronormative scripts/ideas is frustrating and sad. Again, people are complex and much more than their sexual roles. There is absolutely NO reason that the smaller partner can’t top. There’s absolutely NO reason that Jimin (let’s be specific here since these are my specific points) can’t be a top, can’t be assertive, can’t be portrayed outside your limited view of “babie Jimi” Even in real life, yes he’s adorable – but he’s also legitimately scary as fuck and he could kick all our asses. And he’s not TINY. Let's be real. He’s 5’9” - I can’t understand why so many people depict him as being like 5’3” or some shit. Trust me, that man can reach that top shelf to grab a bowl and doesn’t need Kook to do it for him. Stop making him a feminized, weak, damsel in distress. He’s a MAN and you’d do well to fucking realize that. Jungkook also deserves more than this general script of only topping, being stupid or aggressive, being incapable of feelings and intimacy, and always being some sort of protector. AKA – Jimin is not “the woman” and Jungkook is not “the man.” THEY ARE MEN. Your homophobic heteronormativity is showing and it’s disgusting.

I do honestly enjoy writing bottom JK, mostly because it’s unconventional (for some gross heteronormative reason). So yeah, you might see a bit more of that in my one-shots. But honestly, maybe y’all need to expand your horizons. I enjoy breaking him out of the confining box so many of you put him in. Same with Jimin. Both he and Jimin deserve great sex, whatever form that happens to take in my work.

Also, the fandom’s inability to separate sub/dom from bottom/top is also GREATLY CONCERNING. I have a lot of thoughts on this issue. Like A LOT. Mostly focused around the disgusting pornification of our youth and the sexualizing of violence. But at the end of the day my point will be short on this. (And keep in mind I will not debate this issue. This is one of my boundaries alright? - it’s HEALTHY to have boundaries) The main point of this is that sex doesn’t need to have power dynamics. It doesn’t. And I’ll concede on the point that some people specifically write BDSM and sub/dom work and that’s fine because again – points 1 and 3 in general points above. But what frustrates me is that even if there isn’t ANY power dynamics people will tag it that way. Why? Is it to get hits because people have been so culturally groomed to be aroused by that? It makes me sad that I miss out on likely some great pieces because it’s tagged wrong. Just because someone is assertive doesn’t mean they’re being a dom and just because someone let’s go and surrender’s to pleasure doesn’t mean they’re being a sub. Assertiveness is so important to have in sexual experiences because one needs to be able to voice what they like and what they don’t like. Assertiveness is not domming.

Some people’s simple lack of understanding of intimacy truly saddens me. And I’m not talking about sex. I’m talking about INTIMACY. About knowing your partner, being there for your partner, talking through things and managing conflict as a team.

This next one is a very specific rant point. If you haven’t read the “There And Back Again” series this might give spoilers and/or you might be lost. As a counselor, I can ASSURE you that the dynamics with Jungkook and Jimin include CARE and COMFORT on both sides. The way people seem to think that Jungkook wasn’t a caretaker for Jimin simply because he didn’t coddle him BLOWS MY MIND. Again, is it just because we have so FEW depictions of true intimacy and care for our partners? People process trauma in so many ways. Some people need the image that apparently so many of you draw up in your mind; the hugs, the soothing words, etc. Some people don’t. Jimin specifically in this piece didn’t need that kind of care. If you paid attention AT ALL to his character you would know that. This version of Jimin needed to feel like he was still capable, that he didn’t lose his strength and who he was, he needed to know that he still had PURPOSE. Jimin didn’t need to be coddled the way you seem to think he did. The way Jungkook didn’t make a big deal of Jimin going to therapy – that's the reaction Jimin NEEDED. If you can’t see Jungkook’s apologies for his focus on Jimin’s injuries and how he couldn’t do certain things as care, if you can’t see Jungkook’s desire to learn grounding techniques to help Jimin through flashbacks and panic attacks as care, if you can’t see Jungkook’s support of not just therapy but going to school as care...then I guess I don’t know what to tell you. But let it be known and clear that Jungkook took care of Jimin in all the ways he needed, and I’m not sorry if you can’t see it. Because THOSE depictions of care and intimacy are NEEDED (clearly) and I won’t write cookie-cutter bullshit just so people like it.

On that note – people's weird dislike of Jimin bottoming at the end of that series is so strange to me. Like, why? Does it revert back to people’s massive inability to accept him as a potential bottom? Is it the inability to reconcile his incredibly masculine portrayal with their perceived feminine role? People say they don’t think he’d healed enough... literally the last chapter is THREE YEARS later. You think he didn’t put in some work in that time? Jesus. As for saying it didn’t seem natural? ...honestly that final scene with them is one of my absolute favorites...I know a few who would agree with me.

I want to throw in one other comment/disclosure before y’all run in here and call me a hypocrite. I did recently call something out that honestly just needed to be, in my opinion. I’m sure much of that situation was due to me being a sexual assault advocate and recognizing the situation for what it was, and for recognizing the impact that the mislabeling could have on others. It was an intense moment, and I’m thankful that the creator was open to hearing me out in my escalated state. We talked through it, heard each other’s points and have moved on. And I still fully support them in their work as they are an incredible writer.

I think that’s all I have. For now.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk.

#rant #fed up #just stop #bts fan fiction #top/bottom #sub/dom #intimacy #ao3 #I'm done justifying my work to you

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