#selkie usopp au

[charkyzombicorn]

For your selkie au

(Shanks and yasopp both suck so we can ship the together)

Shanks when he discovers buggy pulled 2 bad bitches, and is invited to a dinner (where buggy can brag that he got 2 bad bitches and shanks had no bitches): okay but if you 2 could please, please pretend to be my boyfriend for this dinner!

Yasopp and Ben: 😒😑

Shanks roles up to the function and within 10 minutes Buggy figures out that 1) those two orphan kids Shanks had talked Buggy's ears off about he hadn't actually seen since they were 7, he abandoned the orphans and Luffy was probably only so kind to him in impel down because Shanks gave him daddy issues, 2) Yasopp is a selkie and Usopp is his son that he abandoned when the kid was barely older than a toddler, trusting a village of east blue civilians to protect a selkie child and 3) Ben was there for all of this and agrees with all of these decisions

Mihawk is the only one civil after that because Buggy starts calling all three of them out and Croc gets very invested once Luffy is brought up for some reason. Shanks does not get invited to dinner again :(

#one piece #selkie usopp au #cross guild #Shanksopp #benshanks #I don't know the ship names I'm guessing

[gxdmade]

Good morningggg I only slept 4 hourrrs 🥲👌

That said, [shakes coin can] g5 luffys come get ur tiny bestie.

#the true storyteller {ooc} #I’m only on ep 1000 but I think about g5 a lot #big god w lil friends #mythology/mythical shit is my jam…maybe selkie Usopp au perhaps

[charkyzombicorn]

Got a comment on this post sooo Into The Void It Goes! Enjoy!

Usopp didn't know how to take it, when Luffy had marched up to him in his new fifth gear. Usopp had seen the other gears before, but only so long as there was fighting. It should have put Usopp on edge, seeing Luffy hold onto a form that made him so strong when the fighting was done. But for all Usopp's logic (and it was very sound logic) insisted, he saw Luffy jittery and smiling with a softness in his eyes meant just for him, and all the worry seemed lighter.

Luffy hadn't said anything, just finally stopped in front of Usopp and looked at his face, then at his hand. Usopp brought it up automatically - like he usually did when Luffy was in a touchy mood and wanted to play with his hand. But Luffy froze for a second, before grabbing the hand in both of his and looking up at him like he was about to cry, even with the smile still firm on his face. Usopp curled his fingers around Luffy's automatically as his eyebrows lowered. Luffy held his hand tighter. "I love you." He said, looking for any sort of reaction as if it was the first time he said it and not the thousandth.

Usopp couldn't help the sappy smile. "I love you too." He tried to put his other hand over Luffy's but the second the last syllable fell from his mouth Luffy tackled him, giggling and rubbing his cheek on Usopp's. The sniper, from endless practice, managed to not quite fall over. Luffy's hair felt odd, warm and curly and moving, Usopp didn't mind.

Then Luffy pulled away suddenly, and Usopp just then noticed his strange pink irises had a dip in the top and a point at the bottom that made them look like cartoon hearts. "Dance with me!"

Usopp snorted. "Okay - but maybe not where everyone is, not because I can't dance but I can dance so well the poor civilians' eyes will bleed if they see how great--" Luffy was already dragging him to the middle of where the lanterns were just released. In front of everyone. Usopp only made peace that this was happening and hopefully the people of Wano would be forgiving to their savior and his graceless husband.

Luffy finally stopped and turned to him, hearts still in his eyes and smiling like it was the best day of his life. He adjusted their joined hands and then slid his open hand into Usopp's other. "I love you." He said again.

"I love you too." Usopp said easily.

Luffy started giggling, and took a step back in a mime of an invisible stair. Then another, and his feet weren't touching the ground. He went up another three steps and Usopp couldn't bring his hands any higher and almost started asking his many questions. Then Luffy pulled him up and Usopp's feet landed on. Nothing. But solid, as if it were ground. Usopp had so many more questions, but then Luffy pulled his one hand and they where turning.

Luffy was never this smooth when they used to dance to Brook's violin, back when Luffy wore his shirt closed and it seemed like he could face the whole world. Usopp wondered where he learned. Luffy swept through the air like a breeze, bumping lanterns but only changing their path. Usopp felt sloppy, compared to him. But then Luffy was looking at him like he had hung the moon, and Usopp wondered if he was somehow dancing well or if Luffy was just weird. His money was on 'weird'. Luffy guided them as they flowed through the air, lanterns bumped every which way and reflecting in Luffy's heart-shaped eyes, making his curling hair look like a soft white fire. Usopp's heart was lurching but he didn't care at all.

Then, Usopp worked up the courage (which took less time than normal, maybe because Luffy had said it so much in the last 10 minutes) to pull a hand away and then hold Luffy's face, thumbing at that old scar. "I love you." He muttered, to Luffy and not the civilians he could feel staring.

Luffy pulled him into a hug. "I love you too, I love you too, I love you so much, I love you too." He giggled into Usopp's shoulder. "I'll love you until the sun goes out, I love you too." And Usopp didn't know what got into Luffy, but he just rubbed his back while Luffy muttered 'I love you too's into his neck.

#one piece #selkie usopp au #usolu #lusopp #Yeahhhh idk how to write kissing scenes so sadly they don't kiss but this is Certainly not platonic #If you do this with the homies you are legally married now

[charkyzombicorn]

Nika: will you marry me?

Caethes really tired of him: SHURE IN A 5 HUNDRED YEARS!

5 hundred years later

Luffy: USSOP MARRY ME!

usopp: we are already married.

Luffy: MARRY ME AGAIN!

Usopp: okay.

Luffy: My devil fruit wants to marry you too

Usopp: O...kay????

Usopp: WAIT-- So when in gear fifth when u started dancing in the sky with the lanterns with me that was...

Luffy: Half me half Nika, yeah! It really loves you, just like me! Can you marry it too, pleeeeeease??

Usopp:

Usopp: Okay. But Only because I didn't know we were married the first time and I want a party

Luffy: WOOOO

#one piece #selkie usopp au #usolu #lusopp #Fuck you dancing as a love language

[charkyzombicorn]

Gear 5 luffy when he sees usopp

YUP

#one piece #selkie usopp au #usolu #lusopp #I should probably use lusopp because it's the more common ship name but ehhhhh

[charkyzombicorn]

I thought this would be funny

Selkie au

Sabo meetings usopp: so your my little brothers husband?

Usopp: I am married to luffy.

Sabo: you know what that means right.

Usopp:

Sabo: your my brother in law. Meaning your my little brother in law, which means your basically my little brother.

Usopp: okay-

Sabo grabbing usopp by the shoulders: that means If anyone messes with you I’ll literally burn them alive.

Usopp: what?

Sabo: I will kill for you, just tell me who. I already lost one broth and I won’t loss another. You are now my brother so I will protect you like I would luffy.

YESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYESYES--

Sabo heard his brother was Married and was fully prepared to give the shovel talk of the century but he got one good look at Usopp and was hit with All the Big Brother Instincts™ at the same time.

Sabo said 'welcome to the family' got Usopp some sake and let him know he could Absolutely help kidnap Yasopp for the Selkie Tradition of eating deadbeat fathers (Sabo forgot both his brothers but That little fun fact Luffy told him Stayed). Usopp is kind of used to cannibalism as a concept because Luffy mentioned it and Usopp has thought about it perhaps more than a good son should. So Usopp is genuinely touched and feels very welcome (Much more welcome than Garp made him feel but to be fair they weren't married at that time)

#one piece #selkie usopp au #usolu

[charkyzombicorn]

All selkie long to be in the sea, so buggy not being able to swim is really sad.

Also it’s another parallel between him and usopp.

AW that really is sad???

What if he doesn't even really wanna Be a pirate after how his father figure went, but he has to keep sailing because Selkies are attached to the ocean and he's attached to the ocean even if the ocean hates him, and living on a boat is the closest he can get

Of course he very very rarely reveals that he's a selkie, he was a street urchin growing up and he knows very well how shitty people can be. He's only outed at impel down but he got to keep his skin because they wanted him alive.

When he's running through impel down with Luffy Luffy asks him if he has his skin because Buggy tends to hide it. Buggy says he has no idea what Luffy is talking about and Luffy says it's okay because his husband's a selkie. Buggy immediately gets serious and asks Luffy why he's married a selkie (Novelty? Profit? Fun? Some misguided attempt at protection?) and Luffy takes this as an invitation to talk abt Usopp until he is physically stopped.

Buggy's kinda happy at least one Selkie's gonna be okay, Luffy notices Buggy's change in attitude but doesn't understand why.

#one piece #Selkie Usopp AU #Buggy: This is Luffy he's my nephew I'm getting him chicken nuggets #Shanks: *tearing up* you see me as a brother? #Buggy: No! Uh kid who are ur other parents #Luffy: Dragon and Crocodile #Buggy: Yikes nope those are my exes #Buggy: I'm Luffy's uncle-in-law #Usopp: :^D #Usolu #lusopp

[charkyzombicorn]

Did Rob lucci use Rosie to try and baby trap Paulie

Lucci: You can't go out gambling

Paulie: Huh? Why not?

Lucci: You're a bad influence on Rose

Paulie: I Am Not!

Lucci: The other day she went to the local elementary school and bankrupted 10 students and 2 teachers

Paulie:

#one piece #selkie usopp au #Alright whats the ship name #Paulucci #?????????? #If it's not then it is now

[charkyzombicorn]

One piece au where usopp is a selkie. This doesn’t change a whole lot. But he will turn in to a seal and mabey someone will try and steal his skin.

Luffy: Is it Edible?

Usopp: *aghast* No?!??!?!

Luffy: Are you Sure?

Usopp: I think that's some kind of cannibalism???

Luffy: Yes but Is It Edible

Usopp: You Cannot Eat Me, Luffy!

Luffy: Can anyone eat you?

Usopp: No one is allowed to eat me, I can't believe I have to say this

Sanji:

#one piece #Cannibalistic Luffy 🤝 Bisexual Sanji #* needing to be told who's insides they can and cannot eat #usosan #Selkie Usopp AU

[charkyzombicorn]

Nothing is funnier to than usopp and luffy accidentally getting married.

Somewhere on the grand line boa clutches her chest in pain.

Usopp: So... Apparently... We're married

Luffy: I know

Usopp: YOU KNEW?!???!!

Luffy: Yeah. Ur dad told me how he married ur mom

Usopp: and you didn't think to idk TELL ME??

Luffy: You started the ritual, I just accepted. I thought that's why you were crying too

Usopp: I was happy you didn't leave me behind-- you thought I was proposing to you??? And you accepted??!!?

Luffy: Yeah, why?

Usopp:... You like me?

Luffy: Yeah, why?

Usopp: I dunno... Didn't think you like liked me... Thought you would also think I was annoying...

Luffy:

Luffy: Who said that?

Usopp: Well-

Luffy: I need a list and I need pictures because I can't read

#one piece #Selkie Usopp AU #usolu #lusopp #Luffy's gonna hurt some people <3

[charkyzombicorn]

Luffy in an argument bites usopp, but that’s a courting ritual for selkie.

If it is, Usopp doesn't know abt it, he just wacks Luffy with his flipper.

Later Jimbe walks in on Usopp laughing and Luffy chewing on him and just slowly closes the door again

#one piece #Selkie Usopp AU #usolu #lusopp #Jimbe asks Luffy if he was properly courting Usopp and Luffy has no idea what that means #But Jimbe explains it like 'showing you want to be bound to someone you love forever' #Luffy of course says yes and all the other strawhats thought Luffy misunderstood but Luffy did not #Someone else: *implies the possibility of usolu in my au* #Me: Welp my hands are tied such a shame this is just what the people want I have no choice but to make more content for my fav rare pair

[charkyzombicorn]

bartolomeo in any of your aus

(I want to see him simp for the straw hats)

Bartolomeo in All my aus - and quickly before I regret it

Edit: More

Edit: Even More

Son of the Fog AU - everything's the same except Barto heard rumors abt a haunted skeleton pirate and tried to find him to join his crew. He didn't, but he starts frothing at the mouth when he finds out that Premium Luffy Lore and Brook is his second favorite strawhat

Teach him a Lesson AU - In Loguetown Barto still gets his reverence for Luffy because Luffy acted the same when put in the same situation, but he also noticed how amused Luffy's captain looked, and so becomes a Luffy And No One Else stan

Yoinked AU - Barto never really meets Luffy, since Luffy doesn't have the freedom to be a pirate

Marine Dads AU (just dog dad tho) - Barto hears abt Luffy a lot later, post-marineford, but is very inspired by his story and once he finally meets him he starts crying and Luffy has no idea what to do because Barto hasn't even introduced himself yet

One Piece/Soul Eater crossover - Barto is one of Franky's peers and was a super tough bad boi but then Luffy and Usopp (accidentally) saved him from a witch that had magnetism powers that Barto was weak against in pitchfork-form and human-full-of-piercings form. Barto founded the Luffy cult and co-founded the Usopp cult, and joined in marineford-adjacent because he would follow Luffy and Usopp to the ends of the earth

Selkie Usopp AU - Bartolomeo is very passionate abt selkie and fishman rights, and somehow knows more abt selkies than Usopp and Buggy put together (he needed to know abt Luffy-senpai's beloved's culture lest he offend one of The Strawhats)

Myths & Gods AU - Barto was rejecting gods for his whole life when he got stabbed, his arms broken, kidnapped and thrown into a field to die after a gang fight. He couldn't exactly figure out where the hell he was, only that the place was full of flowers (that were god flowers but he didn't know that). He ended up chewing on a sunflower because the seeds are edible maybe and Luffy appeared like 'Hah! First time In a while I've seen someone do that' and then brought everyone over to see the hobo sleeping in their flowers, and tell Sanji to feed him. Barto will now tell everyone that asks that the gods are awesome and they saved him and he's still a pirate but hes borderline door-to-door Mormon because he just won't stop talking abt how the gods helped him in his lowest hour

One Piece/Fruit's Basket Crossover Au - Barto was a delinquent kid (and still kinda is) that, in middle school, ended up in a gang fight with high schoolers. He and his little gang was losing miserably but then they saw a crying "girl"(Barto wasn't sure at the time) with a broken nose that pointed at the towering highschoolers and Luffy, Zoro and Sanji all came out, Zoro with a baby strapped to his back, and they all proceeded to beat the shit out of those highschoolers. That cemented them as the coolest people Barto knows, but then Luffy went up to him and said he had really cool hair and he looked like Brook. Barto had no idea what that meant but it started his massive fanboy crush as well as his entire gang's matching massive fanboy crushes

Wing AU - pretty much same as canon except Barto's got some wings with a lot of dye in them, so much it's hard to tell what kind of wings they are. He can't control his wings flapping when he's excited and he's always tripping around Luffy because he keeps accidentally flying a centimeter and then falling

Roger's Ghost AU - Bartolomeo occasionally thinks abt killing himself so he can be part of Luffy's ghost posse but he never does, he also does a lot more research into the origins of the strawhat because he doesn't want Luffy to be cursed (he knows about the curse even if none of the crew does, it was by accident)

Sun's Personality AU - Bartolomeo is in denial that Luffy isn't entirely Him, tries his best not to wonder if it was Luffy that inspired him or Nika. He had a bit of a strained relationship with his devilfruit at first but learning that Strawhats liked cohabitation with their devilfruit meant Barto put some effort into actually knowing his devil, and they ended up having more in common even if his devil is very straight-laced and traditional while Barto is Barto

Halloween au - Bartolomeo is a cockatrice that is absolutely obsessed with Luffy and draws fanart that borders on furry art of him All The Time and if anyone says anything derogatory about any of the crew he turns them into stone. He has dog ears that he wears in private

#one piece #crossover #soul eater #usolu #selkie usopp au #marine dads au #lusopp #yoinked au #Son of the Fog au #Teach him a Lesson AU #Myths & Gods AU #Using this as a masterpost now #fruit's basket #wing au #Roger's Ghost au #sun's personality au #halloween au

[charkyzombicorn]

Selkie au

What if luffy had random beef with Santa? Like it would start with him thing Santa is evil because why else would yasopp be afraid of him. And then just grow over the years. Like any time something goes wrong he blames Santa

Usopp: My comb broke :(

Luffy: *under his breath* That big red bastard

#one piece #selkie usopp au #usolu

[charkyzombicorn]

Brook: usopp we need to talk.

Usopp: about what?

Brook: as you know me and Jinbe have been spending a lot of time together.

Usopp: yeah.

Brook: well we started dating, and I had to tell you since Jinbe is your dad.

Brook: I would like your blessing for me to begin seeing Jimbe in a more romantic light

Usopp: Uh.

Usopp: Why?

Brook: Well, I value you both as friends and so I want to be respectful.

Usopp: Yeah but. Why are you asking me?

Brook: Because you're Jimbe's son.

Usopp: Who Told You-- aren't you supposed to ask the father about the blessing though?

Brook: Oh... Well, who's your father? Oh! It's Jimbe! I'll go ask him for his blessing to court him, thank you Usopp

Usopp:

Usopp: What?

--

Brook: Do I have permission to ask Jimbe to further our relationship into a romantic sense?

Jimbe: I am Jimbe..?

Brook: Yes.

Jimbe: Okay

Brook: Great!

Brook: Oh, Jimbe! I was hoping to see you. Would you care to join me to stargaze after dinner? I have something very important to ask you

Jimbe:... Is it about us dating?

Brook: *gasp* How did you know?!

#one piece #Selkie Usopp AU #jimbrook

[charkyzombicorn]

I think you should make usopp the reincarnation because it would be funny

Like imagine these this do you find really annoying, you die and get reincarnated and start dating this goofy little guy. And he turns out to be the really annoying dude just reincarnated after eating a fruit 

I'm crying they're the opposite of soulmates--

Luffy solos Nika because he actually seduced Usopp instead of just pining for half his existence. If the moon goddess could see this shit she'd be so annoyed. Usopp thinks it's kinda funny but fully understands why his previous incarnation didn't want to date Luffy But Worse. Honestly he can't explain himself when it comes to why he's dating Luffy (that's a lie he's workshopped a thousand love confessions as if a smile isn't enough to send Luffy over the moon. He can explain it he just can't make people understand). And Luffy hears he was destined to fall in love with Usopp but for Usopp to never love him back and laughs at that because the thought of Usopp not loving him back is ridiculous to him, not because he's so great but because Usopp loves all the crew so so much.

#one piece #selkie usopp au #usolu #Shut up this is my cheesy otp

[charkyzombicorn]

Selkie au

Has anyone ever tried offers to buy yassop or usopp

(Ether from syrup village or form there repeated captions )

If so what would the reaction be

Ether from the people of syrup village or shanks and Luffy

Usopp did not come from as honest of a village as he'd like to believe. They were hiding two of the most coveted race of people currently known, after all. And in the weakest blue on an island that was mostly merchants and small cattle farmers, they needed to be smart if they wanted to keep their most dramatic child hidden.

So when the first rumors that there was a selkie hiding in their humble town got back, they knew it would be no trouble for their whole island to dissappear. So they lied. They made artifacts, forged texts, turned an old farmhouse into a chapel. They said they worshipped the moon god, a selkie whose hair was the ocean's waves and whose anger was the storms that sunk sailors. Eventually the rumors of a selkie on their island turned to rumors of a crazed town that worshipped the moon and the sea and drowned foreign sailors if their rituals commanded it.

And the marines couldn't forgive a hidden selkie, but when they went to interrogate the town and all insisted that the selkie moon god would come and turn every human into a selkie, they were simply written off as a town with a strange religion, and nothing more.

#one piece #selkie usopp au #Yes I'm implying Usopp is the moon god since Luffy is the sun god and usolu #usolu #The moral of the story is being crazy is not a crime