#thankfully i am 90% over him so this is not as painful as it would've been last month but sheeeeesh

[thebirdandhersong]

alas babes I literally cannot defend this man's name anymore except in the name of ignorance which. you can only claim ignorance for so long

#we established boundaries! no texting! limited contact! no teasing! #and what does he do the day i get sick. text me AND tease me through text #he's texted five times since (as in initiated conversation) and like. yeah i mean he's abnormally clueless but considering we had a whole #conversation where i explicitly said hey. i NEED the space. i need space if we're going to keep being friends #this is all a bit much :-) #thankfully i am 90% over him so this is not as painful as it would've been last month but sheeeeesh #i can't even defend him to my friends at this point because when i show them the texts they go what the actual hey is going on #i don't know if it's a matter of ignorance or lack of consideration or him trying to make things go back to normal #(except 'normal' for him was the time when i was crying like every day because i couldn't handle the emotional intimacy #of our strange friendship) or just sheer carelessness but mannnn what a situation #he told me that if he crosses a line to let him know and he'll course correct which like. yeah i mean i WAS thankful for that #but at the same time why is it my responsibility to draw the line why aren't YOU helping observe the line that #i drew earlier this month what is going ONNNN

[queenkaiju]

Killer

Maribat March - Prompt 8

TW: Panic attack, gun/murder (in self-defense), mention of blood

-

The sound was echoing in her head. Playing on loop, over and over. Marinette tried to hide from it, burying herself in her ridiculously expensive duvet, but she kept hearing the bang, feeling the heavy metal of the gun in her hand. Seeing the man's body hitting the ground, laying in a pool of his own blood.

She let out a shuddering breath, burying her face deeper into her feather pillow, wrapped in a silky soft case. She doesn't deserve this kind of luxury. She's a killer.

Marinette sat up abruptly, flinging the comforter off of her, and herself off of the cloud-like mattress. She scooted back, pressing her back into her bookshelf, digging it in painfully. Good. She's not a hero, she deserves the pain. She killed a man, and with no Miraculous Cure to save him he would stay that way. Sobs wracked her body as she curled herself into the smallest ball she could.

A knock at the door made her freeze, breath getting caught in her throat. She knew it was just one of her siblings, Bruce, or Alfred, but all she could hear were gunshots, echoing in her ears. All she could see was the man in the horrible clown mask pointing a gun at Red Robin. All she could do was wish that it hadn't gone down the way it did. Wish that that stupid goon hadn't had a hidden handgun, wish that it hadn't been a kill or be killed situation. Wish that she hadn't chosen to be a monster, chosen to be no better than the criminals she fought.

"Pixie! Hey, it's okay, I'm so sorry, just breathe with me!"

Distantly she could hear Jason's voice, breaking through the haze of self-deprecation she built up around her. Jason, her brother, who was always there for her when the culture shocks of Gotham hit her particularly hard. Her chest heaved as she tried to pull further away, pressing the bookshelf further into her back and making her whimper. She didn't deserve his kindness, doesn't he understand? She killed someone! She broke one of Bruce's only rules! Oh God, she broke the no-kill rule. Bruce was going to disown her and ship her back to Paris, and he'd tell everyone one what she did, and she was going to go to prison and rot in a cell for the rest of her pathetic life! It's what she deserved, so she couldn't blame him.

Jason picked her up and she flailed. Why doesn't he understand?! She's a monster! She's a killer!

"So am I."

Three words. Three words, and her mind halted in its tracks. "I know how hard it is, Pix. God, I was a wreck after the first time. I still get nightmares. But it wasn't your fault, Pix, it was his. He was going to kill Tim, and you had a choice to make. You and Tim, or that scumbag, who was probably going to sleep just fine tonight if you hadn't stopped him." His teal eyes flashed with regret, shadows of horrific things dancing in them. "You made a choice, and I can promise you, none of us are going to criticize you for it. Hell, it's the choice any of us would've made if we were in your shoes."

Another knock sounded at the door, and she jumped, but didn't fall back into another panic attack, thankfully. Dick poked his head in, giving her a soft look. "I've got all the Disney Princess movies queued up and loads of ice cream when you're ready, M."

She took a shuddering breath in. She didn't deserve this. All this pampering and ice cream. She's a killer! But... so is Jason, and Damian, and Cass, and she's 90% sure that Tim isn't as clean as they think. She still loves and trusts them and knows they're good people. Maybe...

Maybe she still is, too?

#batman fanfiction #miraculous fanfiction #maribat march 2024 #maribat #mlb x dc #marinette dupain cheng #jason todd #hurt/comfort #tw gun mention #gun tw #tw panic attack #tw killing