#tw mentions of dysfunctional fam | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cr1ms0nesp3ra-ac3 · 21 days

Text

Part 3: DAY 03

( Sleep Token Lyric Challenge by @a-s-levynn )

This ain't gonna be art for now..

yet.

But instead! An oc's sibling angst oneshot,but before you must start.. warnings ↓

{ TW/TRIGGER WARNINGS:

Implied kidnapping

Mentions of Dysfunctional Family and Implied Abuse(such as either mental, emotional and physical.)

Mentions of Death ( which includes characters who are my ocs, also um parent death. )

Implied Panic Attacks

Mentions of Nightmares

Styles of Anxiety and Paranoia

And Mental Heath mentioned.}

( Btw, just to let you know that this is only my oc lore and my interpretation canon lore to ST, and no this is not canon in real life that they will be having a new band member. I just had to clarify just in case fore' I had to block someone who had said it. )

That will be a first POV of this lore I will be working btw.. and with that!

Let us begin..

an Ascensionism inspired angst oneshot.

Undercut: ↓

[ August 3, 2023 took place of-

Las Vegas, the REDACTED Residence on a streetown. ]

There is no way, no way that the brother that I always love..

now went missing.

I can't be all alone! NOT LIKE THIS!!

Not without my brother like that!! How am I supposed to keep on waiting since he told me that secret?!

...But none of that matters anyway, my sisters were still nicer to me.. though I- can notice that they felt tired.

I see why..

All was starting with worry when Jasmine tried to call Ace, over and over again but there is no response.

Til now.. Hell broke loose when She and Nora began to argue outside of my room during 8:14 PM after Nora returned from working at Starbucks.. I didn't like that, when I began to just hearing that Ace haven't responded her calls.

I didn't believe her at first.. til I tried calling him too.

No responses.

Yet it's the same thing when I tried and tried again. But again, all nothing but silence.

Now I feel scared, scared if my brother was either snatched by someone, or is it because he was busy? But what I am now officially dealing with is that.. well—

I didn't want the broken family we used to had unto from return, Jasmine began to feel tired, feel workaholic, and yet anger is inside because she'll do what it takes to find Ace.. She now works for the detective after she had to quit her job for being a gardener, but Nora and I were worried, but we also didn't want to interrupt her.. and so, we had no choice.

We had to leave her and move somewhere so that she won't hurt us again.

Like our own mother and grandfather from before.

I remember Father and Auntie trying to protect us from them, not until they died from a terrible accident.. yet we're the only three left, the Siblings.

[ August 8, 2023, 10:38 PM.. 4 weeks later after. ]

My own sense of anxiety and paranoia began to spread as I was just lying still on my bed, staring at the celling from midnight. Reflecting it like a shadow shuddering behind the celling fan.. and yet I was shaking from only fear. Because of fear, only just fear and nothing else.

I can't help but feel nothing as a fragile doll, but I don't want them to know..

...There was a nightmare I had, 3 weeks ago at 11:11 PM.

I didn't even want to mention it but it was so scary... Scary but at first, me and Ace were just playing around at the neighborhood, I didn't realize that something happened. Then I stopped, in confusion.. and now scared, as I just saw my brother being held from blue strings, for me, I was forced to watch him get dragged away by... those 5 red eyes.

Yes, those 5 red eyes... I'm not sure what that was. But it scared me.

I was supposed to run up to my brother, reaching him, trying to save him from whatever is trying to get him.

But darkness nor light either tried to stop me, as I got greeted by an...archangel entity–like demi-god, it looked like a woman but not like that in my own eyes.

This demi-god I first saw has 5 eyes, white silvered skin, glowing red color, 3 wings, a black veil dressed and dried dark brown medium-like hair, while staring at my brother who is now in strings like a puppet doll. There was someone controlling him..

I was too frozen when staring at...whoever is hunting my dreams, the expression was blank, blank at first but there is a smile to the lips.. she slowly placed a finger on her lips to keep me quiet, I don't know what to do now but to nod despite my paranoia and fear beginning to rise up.

Then she proceeded to leave like a floating angel, when I tried to get up and shouted at my brother's name to make him "respond"..

I now woke up, shaking and shivering what I just witness.

It was someone, someone who was actually the one who took my brother away from me. And yet I...hated that nightmare. I really do.

Then weeks later, I always pretended that everything is okay to my sister Nora, she was suspicious at first but she always just shrugged and just..let that slide, thank god.

I was this lucky enough that I began to had an panic attack when I was home alone, lucky me didn't have the security cameras at our new home.. Wonder how Jasmine is okay but who knows...

I feel she is no longer the first older sister I loved now. She has changed.

But what that reminds me... Ace is a journalist, he is trying to research about that "Sleep" God he tells me and my sisters' stories about. Every now and then.

Until realization hits me...

Did it just..

.....Was it the one who took Ace?

..Did it, or she actually did?

Or is just my anxiety trying and making me feel delusional?

And yet I hate it.

I hated it so much that I can't help but cry quietly and softly in fear and anxiety mixing together from my brain and body, I tend to cover it with under my own pillow and my blanket.

This is really all my fault for keeping a lot of secrets, it must have been. Because before the week he went missing, he told me about something of him wanting to be a new bandmate of that band we all loved.

I just wish I could stay with Ace.

I just wish I couldn't keep his secrets but I just can't do it, ..bitter consequences will hit me if I say the truth to the ones I know.

This will be the bitter deception I will be forced to live on for now. And it cannot make me feel safe. Nor to set me free from the tragic and sadness that I've been through.

....But maybe.... just— m-maybe..

If you are really safe for me, or you feel comfort for being safe to whoever snatched you, dear brother..

Will you come home?

#oc #oc angst #fanfic #angst oneshot #oneshot #sleep token #sleep token oc #sleep token 666 #<- ( mentioned. )#sleep token band #sleep token fanfic #sleep token fanfiction #tw implied kidnapping #tw mentions of dysfunctional fam #tw mentions of death #tw anxiety #tw paranoia #tw mental health mention #tw parent death mention #tw implied abuse #tw mentions of nightmares #Poor Jake has been through a lot!!!#Btw. Jake and Jasmine will have a very important role during the lore expansion.. they've changed of what they do nor don't want to be now.#sleep token sleep #<- ( mentioned but she only appears in whatever scenes I put lol )#Ma boy is slowly bout to get mental health during the age of 11- I .... feel bad honestly to my ocs help #🥲😭 my honest reaction to this:#a series of small offerings #welp- time for day 4 tomorrow! this time its art again hehe...#time to torture Jake for angst- sorry little small blond boi 😭

5 notes · View notes

goldkirk · 2 years

Text

tw: stomach problems, disordered eating, nausea, puking mention

I have never been diagnosed. no one gave me any tests. It hasn’t been BAD in two and a half years, just pop-up flares on and off. but I swear on everything I hold dear that I’m not making this up and I am doing EVERYTHING to try to eat food that’s healthy and working so hard to make sure I get enough water and calories and.

I always have unpredictable gi swings—I can’t eat as much as usual and then I binge. I thought for the past couple years I probably had an eating disorder and just was lying to myself about it, but when I finally started tracking things this year, that hasn’t seemed to be the case. I THEN decided yeah of course the elderly gi doctor was right that I’m a healthy young lady and this happens to us and stress is a big deal. Of course my extremely traumatized nervous system and worn out brain are going to have a roller coaster for my body for at least a couple years. That’s all it is. But fam

I’ve had back and forths, and I’ve noticed piecemeal symptom increases, but three days ago it’s like a switch got flipped and everything went up to 80-90% severity and stayed constant. I was surprised and then felt stupid bc how did I not predict it? But I’ve catastrophized my health symptoms a bunch of times now and it’s never been a big deal or killed me, so I’m trying to NOT catastrophize.

But the symptoms were increasing. But they weren’t affecting my life. But I was logging them. But they happen at varying levels ALWAYS, of course I wouldn’t think anything of a bit of extra activity. Except it was for months in a row and I noted it but didn’t think anything of it. Except—

And on and on and on ad nauseam (haha pun intended)

About three days ago five or take a few hours I was like “oh my god my digestion has like. fucked off. What happened to my stomach” and it’s been downhill ever since

Nothing changed diet or activity wise, but my distension and pain and nausea went up like crazy, constipation hit and is becoming a repeat offender, even water makes my stomach hurt, and the 3 AM puking from a few weeks ago almost had a repeat occurrence this evening. I’m distended. I’m hungry with no appetite. I’m satiated after a few bites of most things. I get bloated within minutes of eating anything. I have trouble even with protein shakes right now. My ribs ache and my back is getting sore and my left si joint is starting to complain. I’m not digesting vegetables. I’m not handling fat well. My energy is in the pits, my concentration is nonexistent. In three days the amount of calories I’ve been able to get in me WITH supplemental shakes is HALVED.

But it’s only 3 days! That’s a very small sample size!

But the last time it got this bad I wasn’t able to hit even half my needed calories per day. I lost weight and had no energy and was cold and miserable until it eased back to normal levels of dysfunction and I trucked merrily along ever since.

I’ve looked up EVERY alternative to gastroparesis that it could be, and I really would like it to NOT be that, but at this point with it coming back instead of being a “oh it was only one time a few years ago it was THAT bad”, I can’t really ignore the indicators. My symptoms overlap so much with IBS but the hallmarks—the early satiety, the undigested 3 AM dinner reappearance, the lack of appetite, the pain, the nausea, the location of the bloating, the increase in undigested food, the fact that it’s least bad when I eat the WORST ultra processed junk food and absolutely hellish when I have a smidgen of fiber from a veggie, etc etc, like, what am I supposed to think?

Not self diagnosing, but with the way the medical system is both overloaded AND broken and the lack of any concern from anyone until you’re radically underweight or having related symptoms that are dangerous (passing out or nonstop puking)—like what am I supposed to do?

(Not get ahead of myself, that’s what. It’s been 3 days. That’s not even a week.) I’m tracking everything religiously. I’m safe and I’ve got access to food and im able to stay active and I’ve got a lot of rice socks to use as heating pads. I’m able to eat a little more than I was last time. Its entirely possible that this is a weird fluke. But if it ISN’T I shouldn’t put it off. But it’s not like anyone can do anything yet or anything is bad enough to warrant a limited test spot, and also it’s like a minimum 3 month wait to see any specialist if you’re lucky right now, so?

This is just to say, I am doing breathing exercises in the hot water filled bathtub while the puke bowl sits ready next to me, and I’m gonna be fine, and I’m still functioning, and I’m noting down my concern for future me’s reference and will just proceed as best I can till something changes one way or another.

#adventures in continually undiagnosed rickety that may be just trauma and stress or may be a genetic disorder and two of its homies #I hope it’s not bc I want this to never happen again JESUS #health #shh katie #I am so HUNGRY #I was FINALLY AT A HEALTHY WEIGHT AND ENJOYING HAVING STEADY REGULAR FOOD #why now?

11 notes · View notes

ericavandross-archive · 6 years

Photo

'CAUSE RIGHT NOW YOU'RE THE ONLY THING THAT'S MAKING ANY SENSE TO ME

↳ yael meyer - twenty-one - actress / youtuber - Young Hollyweird™

[ the rundown ] tw: mentions of drug use

daughter of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills / srsly they p much raised her / she was five-years-old when the show started / she’s definitely not the product you would expect to come from such a background tho / hayley williams was her bi awakening / unironically enjoys twilight / runs a pretty successful youtube channel ( à la grav3yardgirl ) / into all the sPoOkY sHiT / still going through her emo phase / part of a big dysfunctional as hell jewish family / too affectionate for her own good / completely lacks a filter / text speak + memes + internet slang = her entire vocabulary / has pac man, ddr, and all of the guitar heros in her game room / broke into the movie biz a couple of years ago and is still trying to make a name for herself in the industry outside housewives / surprise surprise: it’s hard af / parties a little too hard to be considered professional but also… wants to be professional / clearly still has a little growing up to do / serial monogamist / part of the young hollyWEIRD crowd / super tight with only her two best friends tho they are inseparable - they’re the three musketeers basically / things are ROUGH tho bc she is now involved in a PR arranged relationship with rusty now (after dating nash easton for about a year following doing anastasia together) / while ok she’s very in love with blue and repressing Real Feelings for rusty it’s a hot MESS / terrified of being broken / laughs off her feelings and swallows them down like the pills and bottles of champagne she likes to pop / but contrary to popular belief she only does these socially / still figuring out her path in life and expressing her individuality in the only ways she knows how - LOUD and PROUD

[ yael needs ]

more of the Young Hollywood crowd! we’re looking for a few more friends to complete the group ( see liv’s post to nab more details ) / other folks that were a part of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ( cast, crew, whoever ) / fans of her youtube and her acting career / people she’s dated over the years ( it’s a lot ok ) / and ofc her CRAZY fam bam - they’re all kind of maladjusted and don’t really know how to interact with each other outside of housewives it’s gon’ be LIT / and honestly whoever else you can think of to throw at me and yael bc she needs it ALL

#deepfearsrp #c: yael meyer #SHE'S A MESS PLS LOVE HER

9 notes · View notes