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animentality · 5 years

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Do you think the Rey x Kylo Ren ship is toxic? If so, do you mind explaining why so? Coz I'm in a bit of a dilemma of trying to educate idiots that think the shipping is cute and I just wanna know your take on it since you're my God and I worship your every word 🙏 Thank you!

I don’t hate Reylo, but I do find it distasteful on multiple levels.

First level: From the Force Awakens, it’s kind of disturbing that so many straight boys and girls latched onto a ship that’s so clearly unhealthy? I mean, Kylo literally tortures her in that movie and tries to kill her multiple times. He THEN kills Han, a man she’d grown to care about, who was something of a father figure to her by that point.

I think that people who ship Reylo not in spite of its tendency towards abusive undertones, but BECAUSE of it, because they get off on the idea of a pure innocent girl being forced to live with or train with Kylo are disturbing. And sure, there will always be disturbing ships.

but this one in particular annoyed me even before the Last Jedi, because way more people shipped the troubled edgelord white guy with the cute and idealistic white girl because…a kind and caring black guy who was raised in a toxic environment but still became a good person isn’t good enough for her?

Like, I don’t care if you think their relationship was “dull” because of how healthy it was, I think there’s some racial antipathy going on there. I think that people chose to ship the two attractive white people together BECAUSE they just naturally expect that to happen, because in movies, that’s the norm.

Attractive white girl? Attractive white boy? All you need is one scene, or even just half a scene, and it’s pretty much true love.

If Finn had been white, you bet your ass people would be ferociously arguing over whether Finn and Rey should be together or Rey and Kylo.

Lmao, and from the yaoi fangirls, you’d even get people shipping Kylo and Finn.

But because of our guilty little racial fetishes, we instead ship…. Kylo and Huxley? Lmao? A ship that makes no sense? But it’s white, so….?

So on the first level, I feel like Reylo made less sense, was only popular because of the racially influenced attractiveness of the main female character and the edgy white male antagonist, and only had ONE possible dynamic, from the Force Awakens.

I’m not saying it’s necessarily, always portrayed as abusive. Some people try to depict it as having the potential to be healthy. And it DOES have that potential. And I’m not begrudging them that.

But from the Force Awakens?

Yes, in canon, it would’ve only been abusive. Forced. Coerced. They are enemies.

So my personal belief was that I don’t care for the “rape-y” dynamic.

And I also don’t care for the Reylo chemistry, so I myself just wasn’t interested in seeing how it could be reinterpreted to be more healthy.

That’s my own personal shipper’s view.

As a non shipper, well, I think fans of the ship really had an ugly way of expressing their tendency to latch onto any white heterosexual “romance” as well. I mean, Star Wars isn’t my childhood, and I’m not a huge fan of the franchise, but I was a little irked that such an adversarial relationship was so often being twisted as a love story?

Which brings me to my next point…

Second level: It’s a relationship that requires a girl “fix” the guy. And I hate stories that automatically assume that girls have to fix bad boys. Girls have to make themselves emotionally available to fix selfish and sadistic men who throw them around, hurt the ones they love, and want to be fascist dictators.

I mean christ.

It’s not the worst example of the “girl fixes boy with the power of love” trope, but Reylo headcanons and fanfics seem intent on making Kylo this poor badboy who was just “forced” to become evil by his circumstances.

They try to make Kylo out to be Zuko, someone worthy of redeemption, when I personally don’t see him as very sympathetic or capable of change.

And after the Last Jedi, I mean, is he redeemable?

He called Rey NOTHING.

Like “You’re nothing…but not to me?”

That’s not a romantic line, no matter what they say.

That’s fucking abusive? She is EVERYTHING to her friends. To Finn, to Leia. To the Resistance.

It’s shitty to say “I’m the only one who cares about you.”

Especially if you barely know the person? People who say that shit to you are trying to make you think you’re alone.

That only they can make you happy, or think you’re special.

So that fucking rankles me.

Plus I hate the idea that Rey might get with Kylo so that her “love” can make him better.

Women are not obligated to fucking fix men.

Rey kicking Kylo’s ass from the Force Awakens was exactly what should’ve happened. She is not “fixing” him, she is dealing with his emotionally immature ass.

And so I dislike Reylo first because I feel like Reylo shippers are just latching onto the two attractive white leads must be romantically involved tired hollywood trope.

And second because said trope also involves this idea that women must be the emotional “half” of the bonded heterosexual whole.

Fuck that, Rey is a good person. That doesn’t mean she has to be with a bad person. Good people DEAL with bad people. They should not HAVE to fix them if they’re too far gone.

Third level: I don’t know if Kylo is too far gone.

So first: shallow white person romance. Second: shallow white person romance based on a concept of a gender binary in which a woman is always going to responsible for all of the emotional needs of a man.

And third: narratively, I think Kylo is a little bitch.

He’s a dick.

He’s not a compelling character for me.

I don’t much care for suffering straight white boys who take out their insecurities on the entire galaxy, and i really don’t think his backstory is interesting on its OWN. I think Luke’s motivations and the training leading up to that moment are interesting, but not Kylo himself. I think his ideology that everything must “start anew” is kind of cool, but…he then pretty much just does the same shit where he’s the leader of the Empire, and he’s going to fucking kill a bunch of people, including the Resistance, and Rey is just on the opposite side, doing the same thing the protagonist always does in the Resistance: Resist.

Part of this is bad writing, I’m sure.

But right now I just don’t care for Kylo as a character. And i think Rey herself is a much more positive force, and someone much more idealistic despite growing up in far worse circumstances than him.

I think she deserves better than Kylo, and I don’t want to see a girl who’s smart and kind be reduced to using all of her abilities to save a man who can’t be bothered to truly know her.

I don’t think Kylo truly cares about Rey, he just likes her based on how she makes HIM feel.

And I’m not about it, son, not about it.

So tl;dr- I don’t care for Reylo because originally it was just the usual antagonistic straight white couple with a bad hetty dynamic, but it’s recently become much worse since it’s upped the bad hetty dynamic by making Rey Kylo’s “only hope” for redemption when she deserves her own story.

And I feel like Reylo shippers don’t care about that when they really should.

#star wars #kylo ren #rey

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