#yuayt | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pandorafallz · 3 months

Text

Lest We Rest Upon Our Graves | C2

The rest of the evening was not an improvement.

The words of So’lek lingered at the back of her mind beyond the migraine that had set up shop inside her skull. Nalin gave her something stronger than aspirin to take the edge off but it left her feeling…a little out of it as she returned to their sleeping area for…downtime away from everyone. It would be soon time for people to go to bed. Lest not risk running into Ri’nela and getting that promised ‘discussion’ from So’lek.

Alma took her place on the uncomfortable mattress of her bunk bed (the top half) only taking her boots and turquoise scarf off really for now before she’d chance into nightwear for the night; she just…needed her mind to wind down. Heal from the migraine and…let her rest. The pillow was lumpy and the springs dug into her spine but it didn’t…really bother her as she stared up at the ceiling. There were worse things in life than an uncomfortable mattress and pillow; the pin-prickling sensation ticked at her ribs almost like a reminder of that.

She didn’t know….what to do now. What could she do for the Sarentu kids if they didn’t want her involvement? She had nothing here she could give…or do. Not without her avatar; at least with that she had more freedom to go out and do something. She couldn’t do much as a human in the vast world of Pandora.

Alma sighed deeply, rubbing her eyes with her fingers.

Things were so much easier before… but she couldn’t take it back. She couldn’t help Nor… or Teylan with them gone. With Ri’nela, she would be the easiest to try to talk to and Kìoetey was busy helping the resistance to stick around much; exploring the world and sharing that with Ri’nela. They were close now, unsurprisingly so any conversation with one would certainly be heard by the other. Privacy with them was not a luxury any more, even if So’lek’s threat wasn’t keeping her away.

God only knew where Teylan ended up. He had liked it inside more than out; being out in such a vast world must be overwhelming and… she had heard Nor try and get him out to explore a bit before the bombing. Perhaps Teylan was at an abandoned RDA facility? Familiar enough for him to find comfort, she was sure. But which one, she had no idea. Kìoetey had destroyed a lot in the past few months.

She couldn’t bring Nor back and…she didn’t want to be the one to do that; he would surely bury his blade into her again if she tried. What would happen if he did come back? Would he kill her? Would the Resistance want him around still? Or was the murder of her avatar enough for the Resistance to keep him at arm’s length; in fear of him doing that to a human being? It…was a loss for the Sarentu, now that it was pointed out; so few of them left now.

There had been nine children taken back then. Not all of them survived TAP which…was her biggest failure. Useless to preserve the children she had had a part in taking.

Aha’ri had died at Mercer’s hands. Okni had died of sickness a year after Aha’ri’s death. Yuayt had lost the trust of his Sarentu friends; he had sold their escape plan out to the guards. According to the Security feeds, he had killed himself by running and attacking his guards till they shot him. The guilt of Aha’ri’s death had weighed the eleven-year-old down more than expected. More than what she expected from him.

Telisi and Yefti had been the last to die. Her fault, really. Faulty cryopods. She knew their remains had been recovered from the broken pods and buried outside of Resistance HQ in the Kinglor Forest.

Four of the nine Sarentu lived, but not enough for a full clan. Perhaps time would see people would leave their native clan and join the Sarentu; take the mark and live through new traditions for the growth and development of a new Sarentu clan to walk Pandora’s surface. People came and left their clans for another cause. She had learned from Jake that the Olangi clan had been absorbed into the Omatikaya with the reduced numbers following the battle. It wasn’t unheard of for it to happen the other way around.

What could she do?

Alma mulled, not getting out of bed as people came to bed; her bunk bed shifting as someone clambered into it with a heavy sign. Anqa.

A small idea came to mind. Anqa. A pilot. Someone who could take her to places. That…was a start. TAP Con-1 had become a dump site after they had left; used to hide the mess in the toxic smog they left to cover their tracks in that area of the world. Alma had left…many things there to hide them from Mercer…or maybe herself as well. Kept away but…maybe she needed to bring them back. The Sarentu deserved that at the least.

It was the only thing she could do, she supposed.

Anqa wasn’t there when she first woke up, her head pounding and her neck feeling stiff but Alma pulled herself together despite almost falling out of the top bunk; her balance wavering for a moment until her head cleared enough to walk straight. Hopefully, her head would clear up once she had eaten.

Her eyes searched as she walked through the Resistance Hideout, her eyes lingering on Ri’nela as they passed but the girl either didn’t see her or simply ignored her which ached at her heart more; solidifying that she had to make that trip. It could be the starting block to rebuild some trust.

“…s Cortez still in charge now? It just…still so sad and confusing” Priya’s concerned voice echoed from the kitchen but somewhat hushed still.

Her heart sunk into her stomach, her morning appetite vanishing instantly and replaced with unease and a low level of nausea. If Priya was questionable her place here and her leadership… then that was telling a lot about the minds of everyone else. Lovely.

“I know but Jake left her in charge for a reason, She’s been here far longer than anyone else, even me” Anqa’s voice echoed in soft reply. “We can’t forget that.”

“It’s just…hard. Knowing and…hearing all the bad things about what Mercer did in that school...and that she could have had a part in it…I can’t… I don’t know this other Alma. She’s…small. I miss her big and blue, you know.”

Anqa said nothing but there was another exhale that echoed before a soft slurp of a drink.

Alma waited for a few moments, taking the second to compose herself—pretend even that she hadn’t heard—before she strolled into the kitchen casually, not sparing them much of a glance but Priya stiffened right up in the corner of her eye as she opened the fridge, going simply for a protein bottle before she glanced to them, well, Anqa mostly.

“Anqa, will you be flying anyone out today?” Alma was glad for the strength in her voice, as she found that bottle of pills from the previous evening and swallowed two down quickly to get rid of the headache that was still pounding.

Anqa blinked, sparing a look to Priya then shook her head. “Er, no. We’re sitting low for now still. Priya’s still monitoring a few places that look suspicious. There’s an area in the Zeswa’s land that’ got a lot more…activity than usual.”

Alma nodded thoughtfully. “Priya, can you excuse us?”

Priya nodded swiftly, patting Anqa’s shoulder with a quiet goodbye and left like she had a viperwolf following her. Anqa stared at her for a moment with a slight indent between her eyebrows but didn’t break the quiet as Alma took a seat at the table, slowly uncapping her drink for a long draft despite her internal complaints.

“I need a ride to a place that’s… more off the books than usual.” Alma started after a moment, letting her drink settle for a moment. “I need you.”

“No.”

“No?”

“Look, I respect you as a leader but…I’m not helping you do more secret shit. We’ve had enough of that lately and I can’t have that heat when it all hits the fan. I am the only pilot here.” Anqa said tightly. “I can’t have people question my place by helping you do more shitty things.”

Alma flinched a little at her words. “I need to go to TAP Con-1, Anqa. It’s not for a selfish or shitty reason.”

“Why?!” Anqa scoffed a little, setting her hot tea down and sat up straight, “that’s worse than having a secret trip out. There? It’s a toxic cesspit.”

“It’s where….” Alma paused, her voice quieted so it didn’t travel, “It’s where I put Aha’ri’s ashes after her death. TAP Con-1 became a dump site for TAP because it’s generally inaccessible.”

Anqa’s face turned into an annoyed scowl which was unfamiliar to witness. “Oh…come on…” she groaned. “You want…Damn.” She swore lightly, but she looked less defensive. “Why did you put her there?”

“Mercer was going to toss her ashes into the industrial bin. I…I found out about Aha’ri’s death in the morning after the fact. I...couldn’t stop them from burning her but I stole and swapped out her ashes with cigarette ashes. I couldn’t keep them, so I paid off a few people to make the trips and I hid them until I could find a good time to bury her. I never got around to it..” The selfish part of her again hadn’t wanted to make that trip; it involved taking the resistance there; exposing the truth she hadn’t wanted to share.

Anqa looked at her shrewdly, her eyes looking passed her for a moment then she begrudgingly nodded after a moment of mental debate. “Fine. I can take you there but I’m not lying to anyone who asks.”

“Alright.” Alma agreed, that was fair. “You’ll need to cover your skin in sunscreen to block dermal absorption and put a new filter into your exo-mask to breathe past the toxic elements. When we get back, hot showers and wash your clothes.”

“Stranded Decom procedures, got it,” Anqa said, a tad more dismissively.

Alma felt relief blossom in her gut which was enough to ignore the woman’s unusual attitude towards her. She had a chance to…get some closure for the kids. Kìoetey at the very least would get her final goodbye with her sister. She…didn’t want to go back there but she had to make this effort.

That had to count for something. She could do that: force herself to do this and show them she what she was willing to do for them. Ri’nela may not accept her promises but… she had to start somewhere.

“Thank you.”

Alma was sure So’lek had noticed her change of demeanour and was suspicious about it however she had barely paid him any heed beyond letting him know of her and Anqa’s absence and that either he or Priya was in charge until her return. She could see the questions in his eyes as she left but he didn’t question it as Ri’nela had appeared so Alma had taken her chance to bail.

She had packed an empty duffle, a few snacks and a tablet and met Anqa in the Samson. Alma gave the pilot the coordinates and they departed the Resistance Hide out relatively quickly. Smoother sailing as any.

“We have to make two detour routes to avid RDA air patrol around the balloons,” Anqa remarked, her eyes ahead to the cloudy, open skies. “We’ll be there in two hours and seventeen minutes with those routes in place.”

“Alright.” Alma agreed.

Silence relapsed between and Alma kept her gaze turned out the cockpit to the beautiful serene view of the Clouded forest with quiet reverence and…sadness that she’d never get to breathe such smells of the world in again. Only the lingering scents in the airlock or…what was brought back as samples.

Silence lingered between them for a while and Alma felt Anqa look at her a few times in that first hour but didn’t question it for the sake of not opening a conversation that neither of them wanted to have.

“Why’d you do it?”

Alma jumped, her knee cracking against the Samson dash. “Sh—“ She stopped herself from anything more, almost hitting a switch or two, the ebbs of pain vanishing quickly from her knee aside from a low throbbing.

“Careful!” Anqa hissed, making careful adjustments. “Sorry, didn’t mean to make you jump.” Though it didn’t sound too measured. “But, still. My question stands, Cortez. We knew each other from Hell’s Gate. Why did it take you 16 years to wait until Priya heard about TAP from intercepted chatter? Why didn’t you make an effort to see that those kids had survived than just your… assumption.”

“Mercer—“

“No. Don’t use him as an excuse.” Anqa shot down, “I want you to be real with me otherwise I don’t see why I should return you back! The Na’vi lost a whole Clan. The Sarentu lost their families because of what you and Mercer did. Why did you do it?”

Alma blinked at the woman in surprise at how… upfront Anqa was. She usually was more casual but this? This was cold and blunt. More so than earlier. She must have been stewing on these questions for a while. But, Alma knew she had to be careful with her answer, or lest be left behind. She knew Anqa made some passive threats before and often in jest but…she felt the difference in the woman’s attitude to feel the woman had an 80% of following through…for a little while. The woman might turn back for her if she did but… Alma wasn’t gonna brave those waters.

“I…didn’t believe the Na’vi were a…complicated and complex being when I first joined the RDA based on…a few of the Na’vi’s cultural differences. It was all I was exposed to. Mercer encouraged that belief many times so… We—or I—thought that we could…elevate and educate the Na’vi to the same level as humans that would… benefit each other.” Alma started carefully, very aware of how dry her mouth was with how tense Anqa’s grip on the stick was.

“You mean humanise them, using methods from a colonial mindset that had effectively washed away so many indigenous cultures in human history,” Anqa stated. “You must have known what Mercer was going to do when they refused? No clan just hands over their young by the demands from outsiders.”

Alma remained quiet for a moment, “I didn’t think it would end in a massacre.” She admitted, “I…I wondered why Mercer brought so many soldiers. I thought…at worst, they’d simply kidnap them and leave the adults alive—I know that’s not any better in hindsight but…I didn’t think it’d end so bloody.”

“I think that’s the problem, Alma. You didn’t think. You were ambitious enough to excuse a lot of shit for the sake of that damn school. Kids still got hurt, one way or another.”

“I know I failed them. I couldn’t protect them as much as I should have. I stayed in the TAP program to make sure all of them weren’t at the total mercy of Mercer or Harding. I couldn’t stop everything that they did, but I tried to minimise the damage afterwards. It was one of the few ways I could protect them. If I…showed them too much favour, Mercer would have had my ass out of the Program very quickly for being too sympathetic and emotionally compromised.”

Anqa stared ahead of her for a moment, mulling on her words.

Alma took a steadying breath, her nails digging into her palms.

“Why did you leave them behind?” Anqa’s voice was softer this time. “Sixteen years is… a long time, Cortez. Assuming them dead is not enough of an excuse.”

“I couldn’t get them out when the facility fell and the RDA evacuated. The RDA almost shot me in my Avatar because they thought I was a Na’vi. I couldn’t sneak the kids past the soldiers and there were too many eyes and ears. The cryo pods there an already evacuated area so that was the safest area to put them. I thought I had a few days for the dust to settle before I woke them up without having to sneak them out but… Mercer had the facility bombed. You know the rest.”

“You never once wondered?”

“I did.” Alma winced as she said this, “but… I was too scared to check…or to hope.”

“Because you’d wind up straight in this exact situation.” Anqa gestured to Alma as she said this, her tone incredibly dry. “I…hate everything you said but… it’s the most honest you’ve actually been.”

“The worst you’ll do is leave me behind.” Alma shrugged, trying not to sound self-deprecating or anything. “You won’t flat-out stab me.”

Anqa hummed in agreement. “I’m not a killer.” There was a pause, “Just…to clear something up, you’d survive long-term exposure to the toxic mess if abandonment was…necessary?”

“I am not gonna answer that question.” Alma gave her a stern look.

Anqa sighed with a disappointed nod “Fine, fine….” A beat passed, “I’m sure we’d find out sooner or later.”

“Anqa!”

The…tension between them was better marginally by the time they descended into the green smog and on top of the TAP-Con 1 facility and Alma soon realised the pilot was not going to leave her side as she masked up and pulled her bag on.

“Kìoetey said the RDA appeared after she had turned the power on but as long as we’re not powering anything on again, then we’re all good. It’ll be slow going. I hope you know where you’re going ”

“There’s vents and glass doors. We can use the fire extinguishers as our weapons of choice.” Alma said, leading the way out although through the filter were was a slight…eggy undertone as she breathed. Enough was being filtered out so she didn’t feel concerned about it.

There was enough debris to clamber into the building. The signs of AMP suits and…destroyed ones were a haunting sight and more so on the corpse that hadn’t been retrieved inside of one; the man’s remains inside the suit looked to be… well into decomposition but further along than normal and… she was certain the smog’s effects were the cause.

Her stomach turned a little more but she swallowed her unease and pressed on.

It was like a maze without the convenience of power. Alma welded a rather strong extinguisher and it took both their efforts to get through a door or two until Alma found the vent system she was familiar with.

“This way.” She felt her heart beat faster as she got passed the last vent and out to her old office though she didn’t look too hard as she went to the back wall behind all the desks that were opposite the glass wall that showed-cased their lab. She had a few co-workers stationed here back in the day but, they were long gone now. Her table was still cluttered. Never sought to clean it up.

“This is your office?”

“Yes. I hated it, the vents are massive given the Air Conditioning was in higher demand. I was always cold.” Alma said, kneeling down and pulled a small screwdriver out and began to take out one of the panels' screws. It was fiddly work but she had less to deal with this time around it took a thump with the extinguisher to lodge the panel out of place and she let it drop to the carpeted, mossy floor.

Inside, it wasn’t as nice but inside lay the case she had stashed away. It was a simple pelican case, like most of their supplies boxes and was heavily secured.

Anqa helped her pull it out but Alma had them stop before she opened it up with a thumb scanner.

“Fancy.”

“SID could hack this easily. Everyone had shit to hide back in the day. Most of them had porn to stash so no one cared enough to question.” Alma shrugged.

“Good Porn?” Anqa asked, curiously. “I bet some people could do with some…films to enjoy.”

“There’s a….storage cabinet for the technicians down, second left. They have…hard drives of data.” Alma directed, not willing to really go further into that. She wasn’t here for that, but having lived in Tap Con-1 for seven years prior to the school with thin walls…. She knew uncomfortably enough of her colleagues. Unfortunately, it was mutual.

Anqa nodded, debating for a moment then dashed off. “I bet I could get a few favours with those…” she heard the pilot muttered.

The box latches were undone quickly and Alma took a solid second before she braced herself and opened it up.

Inside, it was…as she had left it.

The urns were… not even urns. She had stolen the ashes and hidden them in the Tea, Coffee and Sugar containers from the more personal kitchen; they got replaced quickly so no one gave a fuck. It was the best she had in the circumstances she was in. Aha’ri was in the Coffee pot, Onki was in the sugar pot and Yuayt was in the tea pot. Her hands shook as she retrieved them from the case, making sure none were at risk of opening up and slipped them straight into the duffle along with her other Data drives she had stashed away.

Alma couldn’t help but slip out of the office and into the lab. Her eyes lingered on the old…grow tank that was stationed inside still. Her avatar’s grow-tank. The sight of it made her heart clench but… there was a relief; the sight of it was… opened up a sight of possibilities. A future choice if…she could convince the right people for it. Now wasn’t the time but… did the little ones survive? Were they still here?

Alma spared a look to the office, her hands gripping the screwdriver more tightly but she followed the route to the other side where there was the secondary storage—or more adeptly, cryostorage.

Without power, it took some brute force and pushing to get the door to open.

It wasn’t cold but…nor was it warm. The cool air tickled free against her exposed neck which almost sent a shiver down her spine. She was sure it smelt bad, most of the inside was…overgrown with plant samples, and biosamples. But Alma sought easily the heavy case inside. It was the only one that had this security.

Cortez. A

Alma was gentle as she pulled it from the shelf but she felt…a butterfly sensation as she unsecured it and opened it up. The case was cold, still functional—good to know the case’s own power supply was still going. These battery cells were the good kind for a goddamn reason. Inside the cases were four slots, but only three were filled with the small canisters. She pulled one out carefully, swallowing thickly but the little… signs of life were still there through translucent skin and…tiny, underdeveloped little arms with tiny, little fingers.

Her spare avatars. Still alive after thirty-eight years of cryo.

It wasn’t well known to most of the Avatar program, but the creation process was the most complex part of the Avatar’s existence. Hundreds of avatar embryos were created at a time for each driver but…about 97% of the embryos didn’t survive past fifty cells which was why so many were made. On average, four embryos survived to development to a three-month gestational age and one was carried on to full development. The rest were cryo-tanked. Cheaper to do it that way and, if the avatar died in transit or there was a fault, they had backup avatars to restart without the hassle of the conception again. Hers had never moved from storage, it seemed. How inconvenient to leave fifteen billion dollars behind in a rush. Alma couldn’t…help herself but feel a shred of hope. She…could have an avatar again.

One day.

Just not yet. She could wait.

Not to mention, they’d have to come back for the grow tank for that and necessary supplements for growth.

Once nerves had cooled, and she was on the road to forgiveness, she could broach the topic with the science team, maybe try and talk to Patel or Spellman if her scientists weren’t able or...willing to help. They had Dr Augustine’s avatar floating about still.

Alma set the tube back in and secured it, carrying it out to get her other bag, just in time for Anqa to return with a stolen bag of goodies that…looked more than just simple porn.

“I found some computer parts and wires we can use with the rest of all these things. A few radios and some avatar sizes tech for the resistance. Also, a few masks as well. Figured since I was there, looting is an option.” Aqua said, quite happy with her horde. “Got everything?” Her eyes flickered down to the new case she had but didn’t look too concerned or question it just yet. Thankfully.

“Yes,” Alma said, patting the duffle mostly. “Let’s get back.”

You know, i hadn't expected the amount of people to like it! so I'll progress it as a story. if you want, you can still view the first chap as a one-shot or stand-alone :)

#avatar #avatar au #avatar james cameron #alma cortez #frontiers of pandora #avatar frontiers of pandora #anqa #priya chen #so'lek #teylan #nor #ri'nela #sarentu

17 notes · View notes

pandorafallz · 3 months

Text

Lest We Rest Upon Our Graves | C4

Remorse was a… unfamiliar emotion.

It clung to the back of her throat and its weight also in her chest like a coil of moving rope that shifted slightly with each breath and left a bitter taste on her pallet. Despite the weight, there was an…hollow echo to it. Remorse felt like a heavier burden because she had brought such emotion onto herself by her own actions.

It was…different to the familiarity of regret that Kìoetey did know very well. Regret that she couldn’t do more against the RDA, that she couldn’t have helped her sister back then…or Nor when he had needed her the most. Regret for the lives lost needlessly, her friends both human and Na’vi. Regret had been the result of external factors rather than her own.

It was an uncomfortable difference.

She didn’t know how to fix it.

Was there even a way to fix this? She was sure if Nor was here, he’d say she had done nothing wrong and that Cortez had deserved it. Kìoetey wasn’t Nor, but… she had still killed those baby avatars just as he had killed Cortez’s fully grown one. She had let the anger grow from a flame to a furnace with no control and done what a human had done; lashed out.

Little ones had died as a result of that.

She couldn’t breathe life into those tiny things to undo it nor knew how to create any of them to make up for the losses. An avatar wasn’t something replaceable like a decoration or jewellery.

“Are you okay?” Ri’nela’s voice was soft as she joined her, kneeling beside Kìoetey as the young warrior barely looked up from the upturned soil of Cortez’s Avatar Grave.

“Is…Cortez all right?” Kìoetey asked, ignoring how her voice cracked a little.

Ri’nela’s head tilted before she sighed. “I did not stay to see. I haven’t seen her this last hour so I assume she’s still with the doctor.”

Kìoetey let out a heavy breath. Her words did not provide any comfort “I shouldn’t have killed those avatars.” She muttered, “I…I let my anger get the best of me. I did what Nor did and killed.”

“They were just avatars. You did not kill a real person.”

“Those avatars were babies. The one I smashed into the ground was sucking on their thumb.” Kìoetey couldn’t quite shake that image; sure, the little one was cryo-frozen into that position and it barely moved but that wasn’t the point. “I let the sky person part of me take over in that moment. I…I wanted to spite her. Hurt her as she had hurt us. Me. I thought I was better than that. I tried so hard not to be what Mercer made us to be.”

Ri’nela’s hand came to her shoulder. “There is a lesson to be learned and it’s only been a few months since we woke up from the cold sleep. We’re still…adapting. Shaking away the foreign soil off our Sarentu and Na’vi roots will take time. What Cortez has done to us, having a part in severing our roots, there’s a lot of turmoil that lays between us that cannot be easily navigated.”

“A wrong does not fix another wrong. It only creates more pain and further complexities of grief and suffering.” Kìoetey said, leaning her head more towards Ri’nela’s shoulder, her friend allowing her to rest her head peacefully as they stared at the mound of dirt.

Ri’nela hummed for a moment, the familiar Sarentu hum. “Perhaps we should tend to Aha’ri and the others first before we tend to…Cortez and her troubles. They’ve waited a while to return to the Great Mother.” She said quietly, breaking the hum to speak.

“Yuayt can…be buried beside the avatar’s body.” Kìoetey suggested, “He shouldn’t be laid to rest beside my sister.” She wouldn’t deny him his right of burial and release back to Eywa but… he had sold them out to Harding. To Mercer. She could…forgive him but she couldn’t forget the pain he caused by that. She would see him buried respectfully nonetheless. He still deserved that.

“There’s a huge tree further down where we could bury Okni? It’s got these beautiful roots and woven patterns that…remind me of her hairstyle.” Ri’nela said, her hand coming to her own decorated hair. “She always used to draw trees.”

“Mercer always got rid of them.”

“But it didn’t stop her.” Ri’nela smiled sadly.

“How…do we do their funerals? Have you seen what to do?”

“Not fully, but So’lek has offered to help. He’s been making burial shrouds for the remains the last hour from material gifted from the Kame’tire. They were generous in their offering.”

Kìoetey gave a relieved nod. They had moved the ashes from the scraps Cortez had put them in into woven bags since So’lek had passed them along. Better fitting for them than some random pot with no emotional value. No reason to hide what was inside anymore.

Still, she was grateful for the assistance; they knew too little of their own practices. Ri’nela could only learn so much so quickly from Eywa. So’lek had an experience that…she knew was unfortunate given the loss of his people.

“It’s advised we take a mourning period after we return them to Eywa. Typically a week” Ri’nela added, more hesitantly.

“With the RDA still around and planning, we shouldn’t avoid our duties to the resistance should the time call for it. We can continue our morning process after.”

“I suppose. It just…doesn’t feel proper.” Ri’nela’s tail curled softly.

“Life over death,” Kìoetey mused, “I don’t know where to bury Aha’ri. We don’t know the Clouded forest very well.” She raised her head off Ri’nela’s shoulder. “Nor would know.”

“There’s a Tarsyu plant close to the hideout. We could bury her between its roots? While we have no Home, it’s still Sarentu ground.”

“Yes. That sounds like a good spot.” Kìoetey agreed. It felt right for her sister to have that place. Closer to their ancestors. She knew the one Ri’nela meant; she had visited it herself a few times. It was quite the walk or a short flight on her Ikran.

“Then I will check in with So’lek on those shrouds and let him know of our plans,” Ri’nela said gently rising back to her feet. “You should make preparations yourself. We should remain close to one of the graves for some time as a vigil.”

Kìoetey nodded. “I’ll see to it. I’ll still check in with Nalin and…Cortez. Even if I don’t say much. I need to be at ease first.”

“Do not be fast to forgive her for your own actions.” Ri’nela warned, “Her ambitions still made us into orphans.”

“I know.”

Alexander had been kind enough to help collect together some rations for them, the Na’vi kind which would taste nicer and fresher than the stolen RDA food. Two bottles of water each which Kìoetey decanted into two water skins; to fit better on them while they travelled.

Ultimately, Kìoetey’s feet carried her towards the oddly looming area of the medical beds but instead of seeing Cortez awake and reading or doing something, the woman was…asleep on the gurney. Her pale face looked a little gaunter under the light beside her, a cannula tube inserted into her nose which was the surprise. Her right arm was supported beside her on some pillows and…wrapped in an ice pack and an arm splint was left off to the side. She had some dressing covering her other arm and left hand and softer cuts along her fingers that didn’t need to be dressed given how small they were.

“Cortez?” Kìoetey called, crouching down. Cortez looked…tiny now. She was still…so used to seeing her avatar. A foreign form still…but it was still her.

“She’s sedated.”

Kìoetey jumped a little at the voice, turning sharply to see Nalin returning with a small tray of food and sat down at the small table a few feet away to eat it.

“Why?” Kìoetey couldn’t help but ask.

“After what happened with you, she…freaked out. To put it kindly. I can’t go into much more detail. Patient confidentiality and all. But, the stress on her body was worrying. Once she passed out, I decided to keep her under for the time being so she fully stabilises and she won’t risk pulling out wires or tubes.” Gesturing to the IV Cortez had in her non-splinted arm.

“Is her arm okay? I…didn’t break it, did I?”

“No, not fully. It’ll take about six to eight weeks for them to heal entirely.” Nalin said, taking a sip of water.

“I didn’t….mean to hurt her,” Kìoetey admitted, sadly. “I just…didn’t think.” There was no reply which didn’t quell her concerns. “I just… I wanted to apologise for this harm and…death I caused needlessly.”

“I’m sure she’d appreciate the sentiment but… I think it’s a bit too soon for that.” Nalin said, honestly. “I’d avoid trying to talk to her for at least a few days. Humans respond very differently to…this sort of situation compared to Na’vi.”

Kìoetey nodded; humans hung a lot onto their emotions after the fact and were far fluid in their responses. In all honesty, she had no idea how Cortez would react. “Me and Ri’nela are going away for a few days unless we’re called back for RDA missions. We’re burying our people. You shouldn’t have to worry.”

Nalin nodded, opening her ration back slowly.

Kìoetey spared a last glance to Cortez before making headway towards out. There were other times to address this with Cortez, she supposed. After.

Kìoetey made her way back through the base, passing a few people and overhearing their passive conversation but none of interest so she didn’t change pace until she reached the airlock. She set aside her mask and canister onto the rack, noting the others what had been added since which told her the others were done and waiting.

She didn’t have to go far to find either So’lek or Ri’nela and she was relieved to see them ready, but stepping out of the dark, clouded shades, Kìoetey blinked to see Anufi make an appearance.

“Anufi? You’re here?” Kìoetey asked in surprise, drawing the Tsahìk’s attention to her as she stopped at Ri’nela’s side.

The Tsahìk in question nodded, her tired eyes drifting around to them and then down to the bags of ashes that Ri’nela held carefully to her chest.

“So’lek told me of what was recently returned to you and what must be returned to Eywa. As I am returning to my duties as Tsahìk, I owe a lot to aid. Your people have lost a lot, but… I do recall the Sarentu’s last visit. I helped them with a funeral rite.”

Ri’nela’s head lifted. Her yellow eyes widened a fraction. “You know our people’s way?”

Anufi nodded once, “It was a single but heavy lesson but the Sarentu Tsahìk was grateful to allow us to settle their dead into the circle of ancestors. I will see these three souls are buried in the same manner.”

“In….terms of funeral rites or location?” Kìoetey asked, not sure if she meant one or the other or both for that matter. “You would…allow us to bury our people at The Circle of Ancestors?”

“Returning the spirit from the ashes needs a stronger connection to Eywa.”

Kìoetey spared a look to Ri’nela who nodded at her, approving of the idea. Kìoetey couldn’t disagree; it did sound better than their suggestions. The Circle of Ancestors had a far stronger connection to Eywa than the Tarsyu plant of their people. Children of Eywa were still children of Eywa, regardless of clan.

“Then we shall see that they’re released there,” Ri’nela agreed on her behalf.

“Do you wish for me to join?” So’lek’s question was gentle, “If not, I can stay here at Resistance Base and oversee the humans and keep an eye out on the RDA.”

“We will leave the choice for you,” Kìoetey said, grateful for the offer. “No judgement either way.”

So’lek nodded, looking for a moment conflicted before he gave his answer. “As we are still in unpredictable times with the RDA, I will allow myself to stay back and help with the Resistance in your respectable absence but I will pay my respects to your people once the major conflict has passed.”

“Okay.” Kìoetey could feel some relief in his words. She knew he…wanted to be there for them emotionally and spiritually, and as someone who had buried most of their clan before… he knew. But they needed someone they trusted to have their backs. It wasn’t Cortez any more but So’lek made a good face for the resistance for her to turn to in that regard.

“Follow me,” Anufi whispered softly, gesturing her wood-sharpened prostheses towards the pathway under the thin vein of the dark clouds. Small lights of the plant life still show through the fog.

Through the dark, heavy fog, it was nice. Senseless and warm. Every so often there were muffled noises. Distant and concerning, even as the weight that seemed to keep her body pinned seemed to slowly start lifting. The noise began to get louder and sharper.

“...she’s coming up.”

It was almost a bother.

“…go. I’ll stay… make sure…” the sound was inconstistant.

Alma wanted to curl up and let the darkness take her again… blissful sleep. Dreamless. Away from the world’s trouble.

The sensation of her body seemed to slowly reappear; feeling that she was lying down, her top half on an incline as well…her arm seemed to ache; returning her mind more sharply…

Why was her arm hurting?

Alma groaned a little, wiggling her fingers and was met with a swift complaint as pain sharply stabbed down the very bone. “…ow…”

“Careful, didn’t lift your arm just yet. It’s splinted!” The voice became familiar as Alma blearily opened her eyes.

“Nalin?” She asked then frowned at her as her mind sluggishly began to catch up on why she felt like this. “You…gave me a shot?”

“Yes, but it’s wearing off. I’ll get another to help flush the sedative from your system fully but I needed to get your oxygen situation up and…you to be fully stabilised.” That sounded like a loaded sentence that Alma was in no shape to currently unpack.

Nalin seemed to prep the needle and inserted it into the IV port at her hand before she shoved the stopper down and withdrew it.

“Now, while that takes effect. Can you tell me what you last remember?”

“Feels like a trick question,” Alma mumbled, her other hand coming to rub her face, wincing at her arm as she felt a stinging at her fingers and withdrew her hand to…see her hands covered in little cuts; some covered and some not. The skin looked to be very irritated as well but now swollen.

The glass shattered across the floor. Clear fluid seemed to spread across the metal flooring; seeping everywhere. A little curled up thing….thumb in mouth… lying on the cold, harsh metal….

Alma’s breath came to a pause, the memory resurfacing; the avatar babies… the water… “Kìoetey?!” The words left her lips like a horrified whisper as the last few seconds before the darkness came back. “My…My avatars!” It was perhaps the drugs in her system that stopped her from doing more like trying to scramble out of bed or feel her heart race in her chest but…the calm felt false and she…felt helpless. “They’re dead?” She felt her eyes well up, biting down into her lower lip.

“I’m sorry, Cortez” Nalin’s voice was sympathetic, “Two avatars didn’t make it.”

Alma closed her eyes, trying to hold back her sobs as she tried to comprehend the…odd and familiar sense of grief that…felt so much worse than before. Before when she had one loss. Now she had truly lost it all. No backup, no other options.

“I’ve…I’ve got them right now. They’re wrapped up in a tissue right now in my freezer. When…when you’re able to leave, you can bury them outside.”

Alma didn’t open her eyes as she shifted, rolling enough to not disturb her arm but enough to be on her side, there was a tug from her nose before she yanked it out and tossed the tubing away over the other side of the bed.

“Hey, you need that!”

“No.” She shook her head. She didn’t need more oxygen here. “Go away.”

Nalin let out a soft sigh. “Okay, but we’ll talk more about your…condition when you’re ready for it. Keep your weight off your arm otherwise, you’ll make it worse.”

Alma just grunted but felt her leave, listening out for her steps

She didn’t know how long she lay there just basking in her sadness and just…wanting to sleep it away. But the second shot had been clearing away the grogginess from her mind and body a lot more. The pain in her arm had gotten worse and she had a tension headache as well but it was a low pain at the front of her skull. So, without drugs or…passing out, sleep was not going to come naturally.

It left her mind churning which she didn’t enjoy.

Nor had killed her mature Avatar. Kìoetey had killed the rest. That was not a good metaphor to think about; what that could mean for her. Dead to them? Poetic, if that was the angle. Fitting even for her actions against the Sarentu. Nor had said she had deserved to die but… in which body? The Avatar? Or her? The true her.

She couldn’t face Nor to test that wonder out. Could she face Kìoetey? Alma withdrew at the thought, her arm twinging at the thought. Her arm wasn’t cast up; she had noticed the bag of water; a former ice pack and the splint; she was hurt. But her arm wasn’t broken. At least, not fully.

The splint was a light grey material, adjustable and long so it just about reached the inside of her elbow but with enough space to move it about. It was soft but inside, she could feel the metal plating that kept her arm straight. A part of her was curious to peel it off to see what sort of bruise she had; a break bruise or the lingering mark of Kìoetey’s hand. She’d much prefer the former over the latter but it wasn’t worth the pain or the lecture from Nalin.

Kìoetey was certainly capable of hurting her again.

Which meant she had to keep her distance from them all to avoid getting hurt for a third time. If Kìoetey of all people snapped, then she wasn’t safe with any of them. It hurt to realise that, an ache to the heart but…where was the lie? The resistance certainly needed the Sarentu, or Kìoetey at the least. The young warrior was needed here; being useful and productive.

Alma had no avatar, her friends seemed to have bailed (understandably but ouch) and her leadership was in solid question with all of her people. Alma knew she was tolerated for the sake of her position. Anqa had said herself that Jake’s action of putting her in charge was the reason she still maintained it. So, there was only the value of Toruk Makto that kept her in charge and he had no idea what she had done.

She dreaded to think what he would do if he found out.

Sooner or later, her position was going to falter. Her injury now and no doubt word of what happened would have spread. Gossip always travelled fast. She needed a plan of action before then. The simplest option was there and it was feeling like a pretty good idea.

It would…be wise to take it as well. She’d heal on her own and the Sarentu would work with the resistance without needing to keep an eye on her; to avoid or ignore. Less of a ghost behind them. It’d give her people time to… adjust and process before she’d try to gain their respect again. She couldn’t help the resistance looking like a wet towel of a person. Especially to the other clan leaders that made their appearance, or would when the time came.

“Cortez?” Nalin returned, her combed-back blonde hair looking a little more ruffled as she stepped around the curtain. “Good, you’re still here.” She visibly relaxed. “Feeling better?”

“Not really.”

“I didn’t have high expectations.”

Alma snorted a little, glad for one the doctor was too tired for bedside manner. Nonetheless, Alma rolled back onto her spine, wincing a little at her arm but allowed the doctor to do her checks.

“How bad is my arm?” Alma decided to ask first. “Not broken?”

“You have four hairline fractures in your forearm.” From the side, Nalin pulled the tablet she had out and held it over to show the sight of an arm scan. “One along your radius, three along your ulna.” Her fingers tapped over the damaged bone where the line was easy to see. But, it traced a horrible like that the breaks occurred around the bone Kìoetey had squeezed. Her finger marks upon her very bones.

“How long will it take to heal?”

“About six to eight weeks. These are bad hairline fractures which is why you’re in a lot more pain than if it was simpler stress fractures. The tendons are also irritated as well so it took a while for the swelling to go down.” Nalin said pulling the tablet back. “I’ll give you some more pain meds in a second. Your fingers are still glass-cut. They’ll be sore still since the fluid in the avatar tubes is from Pandora, which has a lower pP Scale so it irritated the open wounds. I flushed those already but it’ll take a few days before your hands get better.”

Alma tiled her uninjured arm to her hands but simply nodded.

“Which…now leads us to…the more worrying concern I have in regards to your health.” Nalin looked uneasy. “I don’t…know if I can treat it if it doesn’t get better on its own.”

“Tell me,” Alma said.

Nalin pulled out the chair and sat down heavily beside her then swapped over her scan. “I’ve found blood in your brain, Cortez.” Her voice wavering a little. “I can’t… know for sure just yet but… I think you might have had a minor ruptured aneurysm when your avatar died”

Alma’s stomach turned. “Oh god.”

“Small, minor and I think it’s healing which is why I can’t find this aneurysm. That’s…one of the reasons I sedated you; high blood pressure risks a rebleed or worse. I needed you to be at rest long enough for the readings and to make sure you weren’t going to drop dead or have a stroke.”

“Why do I sense a ‘but’ here?” Alma said, dry-mouthed.

“I found another,” Nalin said, turning the screen. “Unruptured, but… I can’t operate. I don’t have the tools to operate on the brain like this. I looked. I checked through all of our supplies. I asked everyone at field labs if they had any but…” She hesitated. “I think they were the med tools that got bombed at HQ.”

Alma swallowed uneasily as she took in the screen. The…budge looked further down than she expected; not too big either but that mattered little for where it was. If that haemorrhaged, then the pressure on her brain would skyrocket. She’d probably either go into a coma or have a stroke…then it could most likely kill her if they couldn’t control the bleeding.

“You’re not trained to treat this, are you?” Which was a sad realisation given Nalin was not a surgeon. She was a medical researcher; now head medic following Hajir’s death. Their situation out here in the jungle… of course, they didn’t have all the tools like a bypass or surgical clips and the risk of surgery wasn’t the best odds in the hands of someone who wasn’t trained for it.

“No, but I’ll see if we have any data on alternative treatments or…if any of the Na’vi have ways to cure it,” Nalin said anxiously. “I plan to talk to Anufi if So’lek can arrange a meeting but it’ll be a few days until then.”

Alma took a shuddering breath, handing off the datapad back to the doctor. “Until then?”

“Observation, at best. Your blood pressure can’t be too high otherwise the risks go up. You need to eat well.” The doctor said, “Which…is why I think it’s best if I medically pull you from active duty as the resistance leader.”

Those words hurt, making her flinch a little but Alma hated how that was the right move on the doctor’s part. It hurt still. It hurt to lose that; being the leader was all she had right now. She had nothing else… she was just…some scientist that everyone hated. But the fact was, she couldn’t lead if she dropped dead in the middle of someone’s mission when they needed her.

“Field lab.” Alma croaked, sucking in sharply.

“What?”

“There’s…a field lab. If…If I stay, I’ll stress. I…don’t think I’m ready to be around…the Sarentu kids. Ri’nela avoids me as it is and…I can’t have this again.” her eyes turned to her arm, but her mind went back to the dead avatars.

Nalin’s head tilted but she looked more surprised than anything. “I thought you’d fight me on that.”

“Normally… probably. I’m not messing with a brain that might pop.” She had some self-preservation still, thank you very much and until she knew it was curable or terminal, she was going to try her best to stay alive. She was probably gonna cry about this later… alone. “Don’t tell anyone about this, or that it’s me that’s affected.” She asked.

“You...don’t want to tell anyone?”

“No. I don’t…want to see their pity if it winds up killing me.” Alma winced at her own words, having how her heart pattered too fast. “I…I don’t want people to be nice for the sake of me dying. I want…forgiveness but I can’t have that on the account of pity. It’s false. I don’t wanna die believing lies.”

Perhaps it was some spite or passive aggressiveness but… she didn’t want to live basking in unearned forgiveness. How people treat her, regardless of her life expectancy, was their choice. They could live with that themselves.

“Why not the Sarentu at the very least?”

“No.” Her tonal was final on that. She didn’t deserve their worry if they knew if they would want to. “I think it's best we wait until you’ve got the answer, doc.” Still, right now, she still has a chance. Lest not dwell on the bad first.

“Fine.” Nalin looked very… unhappy about it but with patient confidentiality, she had no choice on the matter.

“Let me look into field labs. I’ll pack after I bury my little avatars. Anqa can take me there.”

“I’m not leaving you there on your own.”

“I don’t expect anything less,” Alma said tiredly because she really didn’t; the woman was doing her best to look after her, regardless of her own personal feelings towards her. “Picking someone good, doc.”

Link to the Polls; Alma's fate!

#avatar #avatar au #avatar james cameron #avatar the way of water #alma cortez #sarentu #so'lek #avatar frontiers of pandora #frontiers of pandora #nor #teylan #ri'nela #avatar rda

9 notes · View notes