whilesleepy

[whilesleepy]

actual canon quotes i can't even

"I met someone who... made me feel... funny. Good. And I didn't want to let that feeling go." - Wilson to Cameron, s2ep06

"You knew he had a wife waiting at home, you didn’t care. I’m not saying you broke up the marriage, but you didn’t help." - Bonnie to House, s3ep20

"The past 20 years you've had three wives, hundreds of colleagues, thousands of patients. But you've kept that one best friend." - Foreman to Wilson, s8ep21

[whilesleepy]

Neil read the following quote from this book:

"I went to the woods because I wanted to live deliberately."

The DPS meetings take place in the cave, hidden in the forest. The forest became a place of safety and refuge for the boys.

In the woods, they expressed their feelings, opinions, and creative thoughts to one another, something that would be impossible to do in Hell-ton without being punished.

The poets had the best time outside, surrounded by nature, and not confined to their dorms in Hell-ton.

The colours in the school are bland, pale, and lifeless shades of brown. This is in contrast to the beautiful, bright sunsets outside of the school.

Nature for the boys was a place to run in any direction they wished, instead of walking single file in sync with the rest of the school. I think this is why Mr. Keating taught the majority of his lessons outside, the boys' minds could be as free as the birds.

[whilesleepy]

neil perry sleeps a lot.

neil perry spends so much time being around other people and being incredibly active. in-class participation, clubs, studying with his classmates, rehearsals, dead poets meetings, and probably more than what’s been shown or talked about.

throughout it all he’s more talkative than the others. he brings everyone together, gets everyone to interact. basically just making sure everyone is included. and he does it with a smile on his face (always always, even when he’s reading a piece of poetry that you can just tell hits him where it hurts. he doesn’t dwell on it. he’ll smile at everyone and move on)

but at night when he knows he’s not needed, or when he knows no one is going to come into his and todd’s dorm, he pretty much just collapses on his bed. he barely even covers himself with a blanket before he’s asleep. at first, he would try and study or do more homework while todd’s still awake and then go to bed at what he thought was a reasonable time. that was soon proven to be pointless (will make a part two) so neil just went to bed as soon as he got to the room. todd doesn’t mind.

but idk, just something about neil putting on a face all day and going around welton like everything is so completely fine with him when it really isn’t. every single day for years that he just gets so burnt out and exhausted. so he turns in as early as eight at night when he can so that when the next day comes he can do it all again

[whilesleepy]

todd would be a mac and cheese fanatic, literally his go to meal.

its plain, cheesy, easy to make, filling and so damn delicious, who'd blame him?

#is this another reason to why i AM todd #?? #dead poets headcanons #todd anderson #mac and cheese is amazing though #dead poets society #yes #dps

[whilesleepy]

I need david shore to go to hell because what the fuck was he thinking. "Hey guys what if we made wilson's one and only successful and stable romantic relationship with a character who is explicitly acknowledged by multiple characters in the show to essentially be a female version of his best friend. And then we Kill her. We Kill her and wilson leaves house hospital bed-ridden because to wilson house is a ghost of amber a ghost of just another one of the hundreds of people wilson could not save with the wretched love and humanity he so pathetically and tightly holds onto who he lives his life by just to end up haunted by it

#what the hell #i don’t like this #not anymore

[whilesleepy]

DUDE DUDE DUDE I JUST FREAKING REWATCHED ’HOUSE’S HEAD’

Do you know where Amber was impaled in the bus crash? HER THIGH! The parallels between her and House are so obvious kill me now

Im screaming crying and throwing up

[whilesleepy]

"Seize the day, make your lives extraordinary"

"I went to the woods to live deliberately"

So I just wanted to talk about the theme of seizing the day and doing things deliberately and with intention.

So I've seen movies and read books with similar themes before but none of them really spoke to me the way this film did.

But with dead poets society I can sincerely say it changed the way I go about life.

I think before this movie I never really understood the term 'Carpe Diem'. Frequently what I see presented as 'making your lives extraordinary' or 'seizing the day' is constantly seeking grand epic moments.

And those moments are special and I appreciate them but watching this movie made me realize what Carpe diem really means to me.

It can be about the smaller things too. It's about indulging your curiosities, enjoying your passions, choosing to be passionate about something.

For me it can be as simple as enjoying a book I'm reading, spending my time writing and letting my imagination run wild, taking a moment to enjoy the nature around me, understanding what brings me joy and going out and doing it.

This is just my personal take on what seize the day can mean. And I think it can look different depending on the situation and can take on a slightly different meaning sometimes.

But in my day to day life this is what I took away from that phrase.

[whilesleepy]

"you suck" absolutely i suck the marrow out of life

[whilesleepy]

ok so the only two scenes where we see Neil crying are in the comfort of Keating’s office and (a little bit) right before his death in the room with his father. Keating’s office is evidently the only place Neil felt safe as it’s where he went throughout the film to find comfort. So is it far fetched for me to say that the only places Neil found comfort were with Mr. Keating and in death?

[whilesleepy]

gonna rewatch dps, lets see if neil lives this time!

[whilesleepy]

wdym people genuinely don’t believe neil and todd were in love

[whilesleepy]

i’m sorry everything i post about dps is sad AF but i’m thinking about charlie as he reaches for todd to wake him up and tell him the news. his hand is so fucking shaky, yet he’s so gentle with todd, rubbing him gently so he doesn’t startle him. he’s trying so so hard to hold it together for him because he knows how the news is going to impact todd and !!!!!

[whilesleepy]

congratulations!

[whilesleepy]

siiiigh. todd autism headcanons because im projecting.

(using they/he/she pronouns for todd in this post. will explain but also if u dont agree i dont care, tw for alcoholism. time period is vague but autism hasnt existed as a legitimate medical diagnosis for all that long, so keep it in mind i guess.)

- cannot for the life of him stand welton's blankets. so itchy, just thin enough to not warm you up enough but still make you sweat, not long enough to cover your entire body. yes im making the blanket line in their poem about actual blankets, a boy needs to vent somewhere.

- beyond terrible temperature regulation, ALWAYS just a little too hot which is made worse by her sensory issues when it comes to wet fabric. constant slight agony and it never really goes away. theyre about 5 minutes away from crying about how uncomfortable they are at all times.

- had god awful handwriting until high school, like his teachers could BARELY read his handwriting it was Bad. OOOOOH OH MY GOD THERES A TRAIN GOING BY I CAN HEAR IT HONKING this is a really ironic thing to be pointing out rn but its sooooo worth mentioning. its still honking this is fun. 🚂. anyway. her parents made her spend an entire summer fixing her handwriting bc that was like the One thing her teachers criticised. its Fine now but their motor function simply doesn't deliver in the handwriting department.

- had a VERY INTENSE special interest in aquatic life + marine biology growing up, like read every book about any ocean animal in any library intense. his parents eventually forced him to abandon it because its "not a good career focus" but he still perks up when anyone mentions fish. once talked neils ear off about the biodiversity of coral reefs for roughly 2 hours, neil got took her to an aquarium for their first date. rip todd anderson you wouldve loved spongebob squarepants.

- looooves pets, namely cats, but they have Too Sweaty hands all the time so any animal fur sticks onto their hands and just feels. so awful.

- had a brief period in his 20s where he was definitely an alcoholic, started as a social drinker but got too addicted to the feeling of not having to adhere to social conventions quite as hard, especially around other drunk ppl. eventually went sober after they realised they just Cant Stand the feeling of a hangover anymore. autistic ppl r more likely to develop a dependency on alcohol if we do start drinking. just btw.

- gets a Pretty Expansive vocabulary after actually starting to pursue literature. sometimes his family lightly teases him about using big words but it confuses the hell out of him. its just a word she thought would apply best!!

- soooooo obsessed with what other ppls idea of them is, both in an anxious way and out of genuine curiosity. would never ask ppl what they think of her bc she thinks thats 1) very broad 2) seems compliment fish-y and 3) just gonna lead to "i think ur great/ nice/ whatever filler compliment." but the dream is to sit someone (neil) down and just ask him every single question possible about how he perceives him.

- asks a billion clarifying questions about anything someone asks him to do, gets anxious about how many questions he's asking, tries to just figure it out, freaks out about the possibility of getting it wrong, ends up doing the thing perfectly. weekly occurrence.

- never fully grasped the appeal of religion (most definitely grew up catholic or christian or Something) just bc she could NOT let the lack of proof go. ALSO not an atheist bc the vastness of space scares them out of it. religious beliefs r a weird topic for them.

- suppresses a good chunk of his stims in public bc One total time someone looked at him weird while he was chewing on a sweatshirt string and he was like i gotta stop NOW. eventually develops tics and has to mask THOSE in public too. dear god someone let this girl unmask. also i started ticcing while writing that bc my body does this great thing where i only tic when im reminded of the concept of ticcing. its great and totally doesnt make me think im faking them (faking for who? dunno bc it usually happens when im alone)

- DOES in fact stim around neil bc NEIL STIMS TOO!!!!!!!! joyous day when they found THAT out! gets vocal stims of random lines from whatever play neil is practicing for. YEAA ART THOU THEEEEREE was a vocal stim for a solid week and a half which made neil VERY excited (autistic neil. how i love u autistic anderperry)

- velcro is The most evil vile disgusting material to ever grace this mortal realm. he hates it more than anything ever and i mean that fully. the feeling of BOTH sides, the noise, how easily it comes apart, she hates it all.

this is the gender part

never really viewed gender and gender roles as anything to adhere to beyond the fear of punishment if they dont. finds any social convention relating to gender to be Really dumb and meaningless, bc gender isn't (scientifically) real in any capacity, so why treat it like that? for the longest time just shrugged and said "eh, i guess im a boy" bc thats what she was used to being told, and didn't feel particularly drawn to agree OR disagree. eventually realised on a late night that Wait. i dont Actually care what i am. like yeah im a Male i guess but also im just me. my brain doesnt have a gender and i basically am my brain, right? and then never really thought about it again because that's genuinely how little he cares. adhering the most to canon with that mindset, she never really tells anyone (for obvious reasons on top of the overall apathy) and just lets the he/him happen to her but. in my dream world? agender they/he/she todd anderson. and this is MY blog so those are the pronouns im using from now on. i will forever love talking abt how autistic ppl very often view gender differently than allistic ppl, will forever love talking abt how autistic ppl are more likely to be trans. autism!!!

also yes that entire paragraph is just my view of gender, change the pronouns and the todd mentions and its just me. what of it.

[whilesleepy]

"Rip It Out" Scene

When the boys are ripping the pages out of their books, Mr. Keating says:

"Keep ripping gentlemen. This is a battle, a war. And the casualties could be you hearts and souls."

Neil's story was written out by his father. Neil tried to erase the words, and skip the chapters of his life he wasn't able to write himself.

He desperately grasped at the pages of his life story, trying to rip them out. But, he got papercuts.

The only way to change his story was to destroy the book completely. He'd rather there be no story at all then one that wasn't written by him.

I think this scene foreshadowed his suicide, because he lost his heart and soul.

#neil perry #dead poets society #what the hell man #this hurts

[whilesleepy]

In the original script, Mr Keating explains that becoming a full member of the Dead Poets Society required a lifetime of apprenticeship, and therefore, the only true members are dead. All the living members are simply pledges, including Keating himself.

So, of all the boys, Neil was the only one to become a true member of the Dead Poets Society.

[whilesleepy]

the dead poets would not be swifties and i’m tired of pretending they would