you-have-made-a-fatal-error

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

they're finally giving us what we want

#:o #key

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

for my fellow bess + george enjoyers

#nancy drew #clue crew #it is 5 am

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

semi-annual tradition of roasting HeR's questionable fucking merch because all their designs are bad again let's goooo ->->->

remember how for a bit there it felt like HeR was putting some effort into making their merch good? desirable? well-designed?

welp it seems pretty clear they're done with that, because i'm sorry but this just looks awful. the font? bad! the horse/lasso clipart? bad! the layout? very, very bad!

"I left my at Shadow 💛 Ranch" are you serious rn? bad! i don't think you tried at all!

actual Mystery of the Seven Keys merch ffs why isn't it called Case of the Seven Keys that sounds so much better has dropped - and while it's nothing special (though some of it is weird - hey do you want an 8x10 metal print of the game 'cover' awkwardly centred on a blurred, indistinct background? 'cause HeR made 'em!) it seems like they can't decide what nancy silhouette to use? because while most of it uses the new exorcist-head-turn pants-y drew silhouette, they've also got a couple pieces with the classic silhouette - the one they haven't used since Stay Tuned for Danger. because who needs brand consistency.

(the nancy silhouette use from mhm to sea - aka for nearly 90% of the games - has not resurfaced.)

the presence of actual KEY merch raises the spectre of who they think is gonna buy all the merch they made during the lead-up to the game - seriously is there any reason someone would buy this now?

i would also argue there was no need for anyone to buy any of these before, but now? $60 for a hoodie with your fucking launch date?? really???

does anyone know what separates the 'classic' icons on the left from the 'deep cut' icons on the right? also wow they're really just never going to acknowledge ran at all anymore huh.

ah yes. noted 'deep cut' references. like henrick. and ethel. and hotchkiss.

these next designs are clearly not the worst things in the store and while I guess they're not awful though I don't like the font they are blatant Bess and George erasure and thus I hate them on principle.

Bess + George > Deirdre. Also, Bess + George > FrankenJoe. hope that clears things up.

the 25 year anniversary merch is a whole load of bad - the 'and all i got was this lousy _____' trend is lame, and has been for 10,000 years, but there are worse crimes. the mug is just boring in a way that looks unfinished rather than minimalistic. font crimes from the magnifying glass - every time i see it i think it says 'snoopers' not 'snooping'. i actually thought the teal callback designs were kind of neat in a nostalgia-bait kind of way until i realized the necklaces were the only option without all the text under the magnifying glass? maybe folks who were more active on the boards get a nostalgia kick from that last one but i'll be honest, it does nothing for me.

i don't mean to be an exhausting pedant but. no sassy detective until trt, no koko kringles until ssh, no easter eggs until dog, no horse shirt until ddi, can't call carson until clk, no lost luggage until dan. also the placement of the text is just. weird. doesn't look right.

and jenna's whale t-shirt still isn't available in green. bye.

#nancy drew #clue crew #my god it is 5am #the cutest coffee cat designs are okay but also someone should have slapped it on a tote bag #elka's shirt is is okay too #but talking about the bad stuff is more /fun/ lmao

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

oh hey i actually bought the thing! here it is temporarily nailed to my wall for photo purposes. the photo still isn't that great. my review? idk man, it's a towel. it functions as needed.

the side with the design isn't very towel-like. it is very soft and i assume it would be nice to lay on at the beach or the pool, but i'm just looking to use it as a towel i don't go anywhere. the design is only on one side, the other side is just your basic towel. bc it's intended as a beach towel it's longer than just your standard towel, i'm a fan of that increased size. it's been through the wash a couple times now without the colours running or the whole thing falling apart, so points for that. there's actually more detail to the pattern than i expected, which is cool.

i actually bought this about a year ago, just never got around to taking a picture - at the time I paid $40 CAD plus shipping, which is still too much to pay for a single towel, but it's still $10 less than it's currently listed for - it's $50 CAD now. idk if they intentionally increased the price in the last year or if it's something fucky with the USD/CAD exchange rate, but that's a 25% increase before shipping. no one should be paying that much for a towel.

tbh $40 - which is really $56 really after adding on the cheapest shipping option - was already a lot for a towel, even if it's primary purpose is to be a piece of merch and not simply a sensible addition to my metaphorical linen cupboard. but $50 before shipping? girl, no one should be paying that.

my god do i want the cre towel with the animals/face design from the HeR store

#sorry to my roommate who had to deal with the banging involved in hanging the thing up for the 5 mins it took to take that picture #only for it to be taken down immediately bc a towel nailed to the wall is impossible to use as a towel #and being used as a towel is it's purpose #clue crew #i'm sure there are rich-people-luxury-towel brands that do charge $50 a towel but those things are not in a girl's everyday price range. #for me that's a lot to spend on a towel. #towel towel towel i've typed 'towel' many times typing up this post it doesn't feel like a word anymore yeesh

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

Me @ Secret of Shadow Ranch

#sha

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

which of my favorite characters from the Nancy Drew PC games is YOUR favorite?

#love me some anja but BESS SWEEP

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

#nancy drew #clue crew #creature of kapu cave #cre

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

Okay so Nancy Drew is here undercover to figure out if a teacher from the past who died of a heart attack is back to take revenge on students because she was bullied to death, and on DAY, er NIGHT one, they are like "OH and you're in charge of the snack shop, which is specifically toast???

And the headmistress is like "don't ever contact me either, btw"

Seems more like cheap babysitting labor and free food service management!

#-_- #wac salt gives me LIFE honestly #wac

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

#nancy drew #clue crew #creature of kapu cave #cre #i could not get a small enough hat pic to avoid pixel hell from shrinkage + tilt

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

the black cat hiding in the air vents just. chucking stuff at unpaid snack shop employees.

So I do one shift at the toaster factory and a key appears??? Is the assumption like... someone tossed it at me? It fell out of somewhere?

#wac #clue crew #warnings at waverly academy

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

Helena you sneaky bench

#nancy drew #clue crew #ven #the phantom of venice

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

“The painting is staring right at me, isn’t it?”

Artwork by Taryn Gee.

#fanarts

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

i doubt I'll be playing, at least until the game hits steam (bc downloading directly from HeR Interactive is not a great way to get a game imo), but if/when I do all original posts about the game will be tagged #Mystery of the Seven Keys, original & reblogged posts will be tagged #KEY (unless we have an alternate acronym?), and anything with spoilers for the culprit and/or finale will get a #spoilers tag

Please reblog this saying whether or not you will tag spoilers for ND34, what tag(s) you will use, and how long you plan to do so for :)

#key #look if HeR's gonna sell games digitally they need to have better support for lost downloaders + reinstallation needs #steam has these things. buying direct from HeR does not

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

#we're here we're queer and we love abortion

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

bird id is pretty far outside my wheelhouse, but it might be a broad-winged hawk? if not, that linked site might help track it down

Felt like Nancy Drew in DOG getting some close pictures of this hawk/falcon/idk what kind of bird. Just glad that no one knocked me out and put me in a burning shed...

#the eye shape and beak shape say hawk to me #but all my bird info comes from like. 20 minutes poking around on a birdwatching website or two. so. grain of salt you know. #beyond the games #dog

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

ok ok ok ok ok

It's my Birthday today, I'm the Birthday Girl, that's me🥰

And my dearest friend gifted this to me:

An ENTIRELY HAND-MADE replica of a puzzle from a hit video game "Nancy Drew: Shadow at the Water's Edge"

This is a treasure. That belongs to me only. One of a kind.

#saw #fanarts #:O

[you-have-made-a-fatal-error]

ohhh has everyone seen QuirkByAbby on etsy? beacause their nd designs-

they're really good y'all

#nancy drew #clue crew #the sweater designs are s t i t c h e d on #(s t i t c h e d /in/?) #ANYWAY my point is it looks like there's some quality there #...i really really like that moon lake one