bisexualbaker

[bisexualbaker]

[ID in alt text]

Not to worry, the next generation is still going strong!

Fuck it. Crochet cartilaginous stingray skeleton

#id in alt text #stingray #crochet #animal death #kinda #for real tho op #that is INCREDIBLE work

[bisexualbaker]

When I was younger and researching the autism diagnosis criteria and symptoms, I thought “oh I couldn’t POSSIBLY be autistic.” Because when I read “takes everything literally” I thought it literally meant EVERYTHING and I was like “I don’t take EVERYTHING literally, just most things!” And I just realized the other day that it didn’t actually mean EVERYTHING and that was an overstatement.

#autism #actuallyautistic #language #disability #interpretation #useful #brain hacks

[bisexualbaker]

My shoes are typically in an entirely different part of the house than my socks. Unless I want to carry my socks to where my shoes are before putting both of them on, both socks first makes the most sense.

I’m having a spirited debate and need a larger sample size

#polls #tumblr polls #socks #shoes #sartorial choices

[bisexualbaker]

something you said has been on my mind for a while - "kink is not inherently sexual". good faith! I don't understand that at all, could you explain it a bit?

This post is educational, hooray! Extensive discussion of kink under the cut. Nothing explicitly sexual is described in detail.

Please note that in this post, I use the terms top and Dom/me interchangeably. This is because I personally identify as a "top" and not a Dom. Some communities draw sharp lines between these two terms, and it's useful to make sure that you're using the same definition as other people when you're talking. Some people use "top" solely to refer to the giving or penetrative partner, which is not synonymous with the dominant partner. Topping subs, power bottoms, and all other permutations exist. I just use that term for myself because I don't like being called a Dom. It sounds like a guy's name to me, I don't like it.

When I text my wife in every morning, "Please bring me my coffee," and she answers, "Yes, Sir!" is that sexual? I'm surely not feeling sexual when I'm barely awake. When I hold my other wife's hand when she's having a depressive fit and tell her, "Daddy's got you, it's okay," that's kink, but it's not sexual. In that moment, neither of us feel particularly sexy, and we're surely not engaging in sex, but it's kink that - forgive the pun - binds us more strongly together.

One of my girls wears a 24/7 collar that I locked in place. (She can ask me at any point to take it off, or she can take it off herself if she wants to, but she chooses this.) That's kink. It's also... a necklace. That's not any more inherently sexual than her wedding ring, though it - for us - certainly symbolizes part of our relationship that happens to sometimes include sex, exactly the same as a wedding ring.

There are a lot of types of kink that don't include sexual contact in any way or which might include sexual contact but don't need to. One of my friends is a sex-repulsed ace bootblack. They literally take care of the boots of tops, usually at play parties. For them, this act of service and submission allows them to go into a particular headspace that's very fulfilling for them. They are explicitly serving the people whose boots they clean and polish. The Dom/mes receive that service and not only get really great-looking boots out of the deal but also get the feeling of power from having someone eager to take care of them and serve them. For some of us, that kind of service allows us access to a feeling of power that can be hard to access in our daily life, and that feels really good.

Sometimes, it can feel good in a sexy way, and sometimes it feels good in a "makes lizard brain feel powerful but not sexy" way. Neither one is inherently better or worse or more or less kinky than the other.

Sometimes, people who like being whipped like it because the line between pain and pleasure is like a wave on the ocean, and they want to surf it. Sometimes, that involves mashing squishy bits together, and sometimes it doesn't. Sometimes, it's just about riding that endorphin wave and then having someone take care of you afterwards.

Sometimes, people want to be tied up in elaborate shibari knots and fucked. Sometimes, people want to be tied up in elaborate shibari knots because that process requires a lot of trust and is an intimate ritual that takes a lot of time. Sometimes, it's both. Sometimes, people want to tie up others because it's a beautiful work of art, because that ritual of binding is a ritual and accesses something sacred for them. Sometimes, they want to be tied up because it's playtime, and that's fun for them! Sometimes, they want to be tied up because when they're tied up, they are 0% in control, and they want to just surrender control to someone whom they can trust.

Some people want to go into sub space - that headspace I talked about earlier - because in their everyday life, they have a lot of responsibilities and stress, and going into that space where nobody can ask anything from them, where they have no responsibility to make any decisions at all, is a relief to them. That might involve squishy bits, or it might not. Some people like going into that sub space because being someone's Good Boy, Sweet Girl, or Good Pup is gender-affirming for them. A friend of mine only feels really safe when he's got his pup hood on, because that means he's With Master, who will protect him.

Some people get gender affirmation out of being in control, being someone's Daddy or Mistress, Sir or Boss. It allows them to access a power that helps them to square their shoulders and take on the world.

All of this entirely skips over the fact that a person's primary sexual organ is between their ears, and some people do get sexual fulfillment out of kink even when no genitalia are involved at all, but I cannot stress enough that the reasons that people enter into the multitude of kink situations in the world are as varied as the people involved. People gain access to comfort, to feelings of stability and order and control over their lives, to gender affirmation, to endorphins that are or aren't sexual in nature, to release from responsibility, to ritual and intimacy, to the ability to provide for others and take care of others in a way that their outside lives may or may not permit. For that matter, they may simply gain access to a paycheck, and that's fine, too. That's no more or less "selling your body" than when I used to run my ass off for 13+ hours a day at my retail job, and I guarantee they're making way, way better money.

The fact that so many people see kink as only and purely sexual means they're missing out on so much of what kink can offer, and narrowing down the experiences of others to this tiny little sliver of what actually exists. Yes, it can be sexual, but it doesn't have to be. The reasons that people engage in kink are as varied as the reasons that people engage in any other kind of interaction, and the fulfillment they get from it is as varied, too.

#nsfa #kink #delightful #yes good #educational #sex ed

[bisexualbaker]

get your power then reblog and tell everyone in the tags!

Note: Powers only work with enthusiastic consent!

#polls #tumblr polls #okay yes #i went with shapeshifting #the insta-knockout came close though #it mostly lost for the potential of having knees that don't hurt going down the stairs #i can deal with being a little turned on every time i take the stairs #it's way better than being in pain

[bisexualbaker]

You know that idealized version of yourself that haunts you with guilt about what you haven't yet become?

They didn't show up.

They don't deserve your praise.

The you who is reading this made it here, despite everything.

This you is the garden worthy of your love and effort.

#love it #motivational #perfect me may be better in almost every way #but she's not here #and i am #so i've got em beat

[bisexualbaker]

Peace be upon you Jews of Jumblr!

With the rise of antisemitism, and one of my favorite things about my Muslim faith being zakat(prescribed charity giving), what are some charities you would like me to give to in these trying times?

I've seen plenty of places to donate to help Palestinians, but I haven't seen anything to help any of you Jews that are facing antisemitism as backlash to all of this.

Forgive me if it has passed, but I know it's around Passover(I believe that's the holiday going on right around now?) And I'm sure there are Synagogues or Jewish charities that could use some donations.(at least I think. I know that Churches and Christian charities take donations around Christmas and Easter.)

I'd truly like to help all who are affected by this war. Whether it be Isreali Jews in Isreal, or diaspora Jews(I think that's the term? What I mean is, Jews who do not live in Isreal) who are struggling with increased antisemitism.

No charity is too niche, though I may not be able to donate to all of them, as I am on SSDI(a form of disability) so it's not like I have hundreds or thousands to throw around. But I know that anything can help.

Love, your friendly disabled queer Muslim with all the questions.

#signal boost #links #resource #charity #zakat #ally work #i had some linked in my original cat crochet pattern post #they may be useful to look up

[bisexualbaker]

i want 60 thousand votes by next thursday

#polls #tumblr polls #yes #15k votes to go

[bisexualbaker]

Okay, I'll add some of my earlier remembered anime titles:

These are, of course, just the ones I remember off the top of my head. There were plenty of others. I also included a few that were before the big anime boom of the late 90s/early 00s, though I'm sure there are more I don't know about.

#polls #tumblr polls #anime #showing my age #digimon is the first one i really recognized as anime i think #so for me i'd say it was either that or dragonball z #other titles that didn't fit include #trigun #gunsmith cats #flint the time detective #metabots #robotech #and more

[bisexualbaker]

Posting due to an emergency- please share widely if you're local to Chicagoland.

If anyone in the Chicagoland area sees this, a friend's service dog prospect is in need of immediate boarding from tomorrow until May 6. Winnie is about 40 pounds and is not dog-reactive at all, but the person caring for her was hospitalized and so my buddy is looking for a short term emergency foster!

I'm available to help with any transportation (you wouldn't need to drive her anywhere!) and compensation+coverage for food/medical/etc. would be involved. You wouldn't need to pay for her stuff, just make sure she has a place to stay and walk her and call me if she needs to go to the vet.

If this is something you or someone you know could help with, please let me know. It's an emergency situation, so for the first time in... well over a year, I am opening my inbox in case this is something you can help with. Please DM me if you or anyone you know can help.

#signal boost #chicago #service dog #service animals #important

[bisexualbaker]

The commute home is just an elaborate but boring magical girl transformation into sweatpants

#lol #accurate #work #labor #clothing

[bisexualbaker]

#time travel #good plans #polls #tumblr polls #after that can we do the same with little ronnie reagan and marge thatcher?

[bisexualbaker]

Yeah, in retrospect, I probably could've just said, "I only use it for crafting purposes," but the words weren't quite braining right at the time.

if you don‘t personally own one but your roommates/parents do and you are allowed to use it, that counts as yes

#polls #tumblr polls #irons #ironing boards #linencraft #fiber arts #and related shenanigans #secret tenth option

[bisexualbaker]

Ignoring permission statements for the purpose of the second question.

Poll for writers and artists

Whether you write fanfic or original works or paint/draw, be it fan art or original work or whatever else - I have to know, because I have a feeling this is going to be very decisive:

Please reblog for sample size!

#polls #tumblr polls #fandom meta #bot problems #machine learning #applied statistics #permission statements

[bisexualbaker]

@thebibliosphere

Bruce “the best way to avoid empty nest syndrome is to never stop having kids” Wayne

#dcu #batman #batfam #batfamily #accurate

[bisexualbaker]

Where's "It's Complicated"? I don't like walking on floors barefoot, so it can be socks or slippers/house shoes, I don't care much which; I tend more towards socks in colder months, but I also don't have shoes that I'll wear for long periods of time without socks at the moment, which means that if I want to go outside for any length of time, not wearing socks means I have to make a trip downstairs first.

In addition, I can only wear socks that are fluffy inside, because everything else doesn't have enough cushion. This means that there are lots and lots of very pretty and/or interesting socks that are No. Yes, this includes during summer.

So I'm not Socks Yes or Socks No, but I'm also not No Opinion, and I'm definitely neurdivergent. I guess I'm Show Results by default?

We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.

#polls #tumblr polls #socks #secret fifth option apparently #i'm running into too many polls where i don't fit any of the listed options recently

[bisexualbaker]

Rhetorical question, but I'm going to answer anyway:

Because the people applying the pressure either have already given up on the person who did the wronging as a lost cause, and/or they don't see what that person did as actually (very or at all) wrong.

why is the pressure to be “the bigger person” always placed on the person who was wronged?

#social interaction #victim blaming #i think #calvinism