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holybananaoafshoe · 4 months

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Sneak peak

Hello! I had some brainrot on Klee and Keaya exploring Fontaine. I typed up a lil rough draft on my lunch break and I wanted to share it as a sneak peak before pounding out the rest!

Enjoy~

“No, no, no, nononononononononono--”

Almost in slow motion, Jumpy Dumpy rolled and bounced across the walkway. Keaya watched in muted horror as another small explosion rocked the inner city wall. Small pieces of stone flew past him, and flames blackened the once white stone.

“Jean is going to kill me,” Keaya whispered.

Screams echoed in the market. People jostled and bumped into him as they ran away. Billowing clouds of smoke rose high above the city wall. Pieces of robots were strewn across the road, and small fires broke out in stalls. A few shopkeepers grabbed buckets and ran to a nearby aqueduct to put out the fires.

A small figure clad in red slammed into his torso and hugged him tightly.

Klee pulled her tearstained face away from his shirt and cried, “Mister Keaya, I didn’t mean it! I promise, I just got so excited to see the robots! I’m trying really hard to be good.”

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, Klee, I know it was,” Keaya said soothingly.

Normally, Keaya would be able to smooth over the misunderstanding quickly. It didn’t take much, just an explanation and some sweet talk. If the damage was more than usual, he’d offer some of his own mora as a small reparations payment and top it off with a promise to fix everything that was damaged.

Would that be considered bribery?

He winced as a chunk of the wall fell with a loud thud onto the blackened pathway.

Perhaps he’d find out sooner than expected.

The Courts of Fontaine were known to be unwavering in their pursuit of justice and relentless in finding the truth of the situation before demanding an equivalent punishment or retribution. Klee wouldn’t be spared from their system, no matter how much of an accident it was. Maybe he’s biased here, but Klee is a good kid. Deep down, she really means well. She’s just prone to… accidents.

Keaya looked up, from here he could just catch a glimpse of the court’s glittering roof.

Maybe… maybe the courts would go easy on them. After all, he was technically the person who was holding the bomb. If nothing else, maybe he could convince them the bombs were his and he forgot to leave them in Mondstadt. If he was convicted and held in the Fortress, maybe he could convince a nice officer to let him write to the Knights of Favonius. Lisa or Jean could come get Klee and smooth everything over.

Maybe everything would be okay?

A tiny explosion went off by the wall. Those who stayed behind to put out the fires yelled and jumped back.

Maybe Jean would reduce his sentence.

He and the shopkeepers kept their eyes fixed on the wall. When it seemed there wouldn’t be any more explosions, they went back to assessing the damages done to their shops. He looked down at Klee with a raised eyebrow and she nervously muttered something about a modification she made to the bombs on the way here. All so she could ‘test them against the super strong robots’ she heard about from the boat attendants.

Barbatos, help us.

Keaya sighed and grabbed a hold of Klee’s small hand. “It seems the situation is under control here, how about we go to the Grand Courts and explain what happened, yeah?”

Klee nodded hesitantly and grabbed his hand. Together, they walked towards the Grand Courts.

.....Nothing else could go wrong, could it?

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holybananaoafshoe · 4 months

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Kaeya and Wrio are interchangeable depending on the situation

#Ice Bridge #wriya #wriothesley #genshin impact #kaeya #genshin kaeya #genshin #genshin impact headcanons #fontaine #genshin wriothesley #klee #tired ice dads #genshin teams without context #listen you know Kaeya is tired af #wrio is like the irritable tired type i think #Kaeya is fighting for his life out here in fontaine with klee liiiikkkeeee

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holybananaoafshoe · 5 months

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Team Dynamics

Scary Dog Privilege 🐺 2/10

They go on many grand adventures…that always go wrong one way or another.

Xiao, at one point, contemplates creating an adepti good luck charm for Benny because Archons is the kid unlucky.

Do you know how many times he or Kazuha saved the kid from an unintentional demise? Too damn many.

Like Xiao is concerned for his well-being at this point.

How the hell does this kid function????

To be brutally honest, Xiao joined them not only to ensure the Walking Disaster’s safety, but to figure out how *vaguely gestures to Benny* he works.

I like to imagine Xiao as the tired babysitter from The Incredibles and Benny as Jack-Jack

He doesn't think the charm would help, but he makes one out of some leaves and twigs anyway and gives it to Benny.

Benny is so touched??? Xiao made him a good luck charm, but not just any! An adeptus good luck charm, so maybe it’ll help ward off the worst of it.

It uh…..certainly wards off like the minor bad luck like he doesn’t burn his food or stub his toe as much.

Kazuha? He’s just enjoying the chaos.

I like to think Kazuha joined Benny because it seemed like a nice change of pace and puts his observation skills to the test

Sadly, the wind can’t warn him fast enough on most days

He’s very observant (apart from the wind thing lmao) so he’s the first one to notice if something is bothering Xiao or if Benny is hiding how he’s feeling

Or if someone hides their wounds.

Interpret that as you will. I like to think Xiao or Benny would.

Xiao, to appear tough and because he’s used to working alone ever since his siblings passed. Benny because he wants to make sure the others are okay first, and maybe he feels bad about his luck rubbing off on them and doesn’t want to bother them more than he already has.

The Wind Thing™ is amazing to Benny and he’s in awe of Kazuha’s attunement to nature and the general awareness he has for their surroundings.

It kind of freaks Xiao out just a little.

A *tiny* bit. It’s just enough that when Kazuha first mentions that the wind told him something Xiao is giving him slight side-eye and a thought of Oh no he’s crazy flits across the back of his mind… until they investigate and find that Kazuha was right.

Xiao himself has really really good intuition from years of fighting, but nothing quite like the wind telling him something.

If it works, it works, so long as Kazuha isn’t bothered by it, he supposes. (Part of Xiao wonders if it was an evil demon or spirit… he definitely Did Not spend a week or two trying to make sure Kazuha’s wind thing wasn’t something he should conquer or banish or get that kid with the high yang energy…. Chongyun, to exorcise)

His extremely calm demeanor is slightly off-putting to Xiao

Despite that, Xiao notices when Kazuha starts to slow down in a fight or when cracks start to show in his calm facade (more on this *later*)

I like to think Kazuha reacts more internally than he does outwardly.

Like Kazuha does show emotion, but is more low key about it.

*The stove explodes and Benny just laughs. He’s covered in soot and his clothes are singed, but he smiles and tells them he accidentally got the lizard powder he has on him too close to the fire* “Ah I should have been more careful, I must have forgotten to take this out of my pocket when I was with Klee and Albedo a few weeks ago…”

Kazuha: *staring wide eyed with a strained smile* I… see, it’s lucky we weren’t too close then. *pats Benny’s back and helps clean up the camp*

Kazuha internally: What the fuck was that? Holy shit, I thought we were going to die… I might actually die if I keep traveling with him holy shit. How is he still alive????? How am I alive????

((Xiao stopped being surprised at the unlucky after traveling with Benny for a week))

I also like to think that Kazuha and Xiao will look at eachother like they’re in The Office once they’re used to Benny’s luck

*Benny burns the food once again* “Aw, man, I left it on too long!” *Kazuha looks over to Xiao, who had just gotten back from collecting firewood, like can you believe this kid? And Xiao just shrugs*

How does Kazuha say the most profound shit casually like it’s any other Tuesday??? Xiao is somewhat convinced Kazuha either had 1. Something traumatic happen to him or 2. Was definitely a priest or something at some point.

While Benny is like 75% sure Kazuha is some kind of poet that writes under a pen name.

He totally tries to discreetly figure out what Kazuha’s author name is lol and when he outright asks and Kazuha denies being an author all Benny can think is: “I see, he’s a private person and doesn’t want his identity to come out.”

*proceeds to try to “protect” Kazuha’s different identities anytime he thinks they’re getting exposed*

It goes on like this until they learn about Kazuha’s backstory (more on this *later*)

Xiao is like 90% sure Kazuha is high in one way or another half the time, and honestly? He'd join him if he didn't have to be the fucking sane one in the group.

Benny??

He’s just so happy to have travel companions tbh.

Benny keeps the mood up and his happy-go-lucky attitude often rubs off on the others

Even Xiao will find himself smiling slightly at Benny’s excitement

Though, his travel companions are a bit strange, but, hey, his dads at the guild taught him not to judge a book by its cover and it turned out Xiao and Kazuha are pretty cool!

And! They don’t seem to mind his bad luck!

Benny is the mastermind behind their expeditions and adventures, be it commissions that he gets through the guild or a rumor he’s heard in Liyue Harbor.

#genshin impact #genshin #genshin impact headcanons #team dynamics #scary dog privilege #Bennett #Xiao #Kazuha #you know they'd all be a little off put by Xiao and Kazuha #Kazuha is at least a little bit more of a “normal” wonderer/traveler #but xiao is like the silent judging type or at leadt you think he's judging lmao #benny is so happy to have traveling companions

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holybananaoafshoe · 5 months

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✨️Team Dynamics ✨️

Tired Cyro Dads 8/8

Happy holidays!! The last one!!! How exciting! I'll still post some brain rot on them. Don't worry, they won't disappear. Before I post anything lengthy on them, I really really should finish Sumeru to start Fontaine! Haha I'm so excited to grind through the quests to see the story of Fontaine and get more ideas for the Ice Dads.

For now, enjoy the how-would-they-all-share-a-bed trend on Tik Tok.

Kaeya is a cuddler, one arm draped over Wrio and the other under his pillow. He braids his hair at night to keep it from getting knotted and takes off his eye patch

The first time he took it off around Wrio and the others he was nervous, but they didn’t ask any questions about his scar or about the odd gold color of his eye, and he appreciated that

Wrio tends to sprawl out on the bed and drools in his sleep.

Wrio is also a light sleeper, it comes with being a prison guard, but that means Kaeya can’t sneak out as well when he has a nightmare.

Klee is between them, or basically on top of the two, a foot pushing Kaeya’s chin up and Dodoco clutched in her hand. She takes her hair out of her pigtails at night.

She gets soooo many knots in her hair, but Kaeya is great at brushing her hair gently

She’s a heavy sleeper, which is nice when Kaeya wakes up from a nightmare and has to untangle himself from her to brew a cup of tea.

Freminet is on the other side of Wrio, sleeping on top of Wrio’s arm. He’s the type to sleep very still and soundly, there’s a few times where Wrio swears he’s dead.

He clutches Percy to his chest as he sleeps, sometimes sleeping with his diving helmet on, much to Wrio’s chargin.

The blanket?

Usually, most of it goes to Freminet, who’s so cold all of the time, and the other half is like messily thrown over Wrio, who gets hot easily.

They actually need another blanket for Kaeya, who claims he’s okay, but Wrio knows he’s cold because he's shivering.

“Kaeya, just take the damn blanket for my peace of mind, okay?”

"W-w-what are you talking ab-b-bout? I'm fine."

*proceeds to get a fuzzy blanket or a coat thrown over him*

I headcannon that Kaeya got cold easily before his vision, and now it’s even worse.

It’s the reason why he wears so many layers. After so many years, he’s gotten used to being cold, you know?

At nighttime, it’s worse since he isn’t moving often to keep warm.

On days where he over uses his vision, his body gets really achy, and he’s like 50% sure he’s getting hypothermia. The other half is like “nah, that won’t happen.”

Wrio would disagree, but that’s a whole other drabble.

(if they don’t have an extra blanket Wrio drapes his coat over Kaeya)

So most of the time the blanket ends up draped over Kaeya’s legs/lower torso and he just cuddles with Wrio to keep warm.

Klee is honestly too restless to even keep a blanket on her, and she is also like a mini furnace. Is it from her pyro vision or just from being naturally hot-blooded, who’s to say?

Sleepover fic? 👀

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holybananaoafshoe · 5 months

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Team Dynamics 🐺

Scary Dog Privilege 1/10

Xiao, Zhongli, Benny, Kazuha

I’m not going to stop with the Tired Ice Dads, but I definitely need to start the Fontaine quests before doing more on them lmao. Buuuuuuuut, I have other main teams on my account that I shove together, and after doing the Ice Dads, I started cackling about the crack energy this group would have.

A little taste to enjoy~

Zhongli just wanted to fucking retire and flirt with Child but that’s besides the point.

He can’t help that his adopted son just does not have a single ounce of self-preservation in his body.

He morally can’t let him go off on his own too much, or else he’d get gray hairs from having to run to his rescue last minute *cough* the chasm *cough*

That and Xiao has been having a lot of issues with his karmic debt lately.

While he doesn’t like Barbatos, Rex Lapis can’t let his last adepti die like his siblings had he can’t fail him like the others, so he could swallow his pride and ask Batbatos to erase Xiao’s karmic debt.

And if he can help Xiao, that's an added bonus.

Or force him into some self care

He’s not exactly in the team yet. He just comes by to check on them every once in a while.

Much to Xiao’s distaste, his dad has been following him around--he’s a very capable adepti, thanks.

He really is, technically, he’s the strongest since Zhongli has to hold back his power now.

But, he secretly likes that Zhongli is looking out for him.

And maaayyybbeeee he enjoys listening to Zhongli talk about random things and lowkey put historians in their place.

Xiao meets Kazuha and Benny by chance tbh.

Kazuha was minding his business, honest, and wandering around the plains of Liyue because the Crux’s crew was taking a break from the sea.

He was lounging on a rock, playing a tune on a leaf, when the wind picked up and told him someone was in danger.

(listen, I don’t know how it works either. He’s just very in tune with nature ig).

So, he couldn’t just ignore the call… and he’s nosey, so sue him if he wanted to know what was up.

Low and behold, it was poor Bennett fighting off a Mantichural.

Look… it wasn’t his fault!!!

How was he supposed to know that climbing up a rock formation (it was more like a mini mountain really) to get a better idea of where he was, because of course he was lost, would end up with him tripping on a mist flower (yes a mist flower), falling off said rock formation, and land him on top of a very pissed Mantichural?!?!?!?!?

Not him!!!!

He was just trying to go on commissions for the guild!

Benny was handling it pretty okay, but the poor boy was having a rough day and was extremely grateful that Kazuha had come along to help.

Between the two, they were doing pretty solid.

Xiao heard the commotion and came over. It is his duty to make sure the citizens and travelers of Liyue were safe after all.

Both are very impressed and somewhat scared at how fast Xiao defeats the Mantichural.

He takes them to Wangshu Inn, and everyone thought they would part ways after that.

Wrooonnggg.

After hearing about Benny’s adventures, Kazuha decides to team up with him because he’s honestly worried about his safety.

Xiao winds up saving them both like five more times before joining them because he’s sick of saving them every hour.

He was headed to Liyue Harbor anyway.

The two are thankful, but his quiet demeanor and straight-to-the-point personality is off-putting.

They finally get to Liyue Harbor and part ways….

Not lmao

Xiao saves Benny from drowning in the harbor and finds a frantic Kazuha about ready to jump in the sea after the kid.

Literally, Xiao was just passing by after meeting with Madam Ping when he saw them.

Soon after that, he winds up saving Benny from choking on food during the diner. Benny and Kazuha invited him to thank him.

He really tried to tell them it wasn’t necessary, but Benny’s dads taught him well, and he’s going to properly thank Xiao.

Fuck, guess Xiao has to look after them now bc this dumbass is going to keep him awake at night.

So he joins Benny’s team :)

#Xiao #Bennett #Zhongli #Kazuha #genshin impact #Team Dynamics #scary dog privilege #they get that name bc i built Xiao like a tank #Zhongli is mainly a sheilder #benny a work in progress lmao #kazuha is also built like a tank #kazuha single handedly carried me all the way to inazuma #got him on the first run bbyy #i take them to boss fights or domains that i want to finish quickly #no ships here they’re all buddies #buddies brought together by wild circumstances #Liyue #genshin impact headcanons

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holybananaoafshoe · 5 months

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BRING THEM BACK

We need to bring back private rail cars as the cool, sexy, exclusive way to travel, so instead of dumping the carbon budget of a small nation in the global south on private jets, celebrities have to attach their luxury pull an cars to the back of an Amtrak. Then the celebrities will lobby for Amtrak lines to be better

Seriously when did this

Become sexier than this

Like isn't it nice to watch the scenery, to be able to open a window and have fresh air, to be able to stand up all the way, not have your ears pop?

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holybananaoafshoe · 5 months

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Listen I have some friends that know I'm in a couple Fandoms but I don't think they truly understand how d e e p the depths are

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holybananaoafshoe · 5 months

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✨️Team Dynamics ✨️

Tired Cryo Dads 7/8

The fighting dynamic:

They’re all DPS material so it’s chaotic

I like to think Klee and Freminet let’s Kaeya and Wrio do the heavy lifting while they provide cover fire/defense

Unless Klee, the beautiful chaos child, stumbles on a hilichurl nest--then she nukes the place and tearfully turns herself into Wrio, who tells her it’s okay to use her bombs on bad guys (and ignores the scene of utter destruction behind the child)

If Wrio and/or Kaeya get in trouble, which doesn’t happen too often, Freminet is the one to block the heavy blows directed to the two adults and Klee will one shot it with a bomb

Wrio is very impressed and very intimidated

They aren’t life-threatening wounds by any means, but being caught off guard is dangerous. They’re lucky Klee and Freminet were with them

Kaeya is getting messily bandaged up by Klee, who’s pulling out medical supplies from her backpack with tears in her eyes because she’s never seen Kaeya get hurt before (or at least he doesn’t get too injured when she’s with him)

“Don’t worry, Klee, it’s just a *winces* small cut, I’ll be fine! Wrio and I had the whole situation under control.”

They didn’t, but the sentiment seems to calm her down as Kaeya tells her grandly how they were going to take down the bad guy

He rebandages his wounds with the supplies in her bag (Klee now discussing the new bombs she made) as Freminet gets to work on Wrio

“You always tell me to be careful while I’m diving, but who’s being reckless by shielding the Cavalry Captain with his body?”

“Ah *ruffles Freminet’s hair, ignoring the glare* don’t worry kid, it takes a lot more than that to get me down.”

The action calms Freminet’s shaking hands, and as much as he hates to admit, he’s started to see Wrio as a father figure

One day Kaeya got badly injured fighting a group of corrupted robots

For one reason or another, he had decided to go look at some ruins Lisa had asked him to get photos of

Wrio had a briefing about the criminal of the week that morning and Klee was getting a tour of the city via Freminet and his siblings, so it was a good time to explorer and take some much needed alone time

That and the Fontaine sibling trio wanted Klee over for a sleepover, so he could spend the night exploring too

Bonus: he wouldn’t have to worry about Klee bombing the ruins

At the very least, he left a note with Klee and Freminet for Wrio before leaving with a wave and a “Have fun, Klee, I’ll see you all in the morning!”

He was literally in the middle of taking photos when he heard a clicking noise echo through the ruins, uneasy he put the Kamera away quickly and readied his sword.

Quietly, he made his way through the ruins, looking for the intruders.

Unfortunately, these robots had heat vision, and as soon as they picked up Kaeya’s heat signature, they charged.

He was doing pretty good at holding off the robots, but the sheer amount of them was overwhelming, even for him

After taking out half, one got the better of him and left him open to several heavy landing attacks.

He had disposed of one. An eerie clicking noise sounded behind him, and he spun around, ice coating the tip of his sword, ready to cut the robot down.

His sword is met with an empty space, and just as he’s processing that the robot is on his blind side, a white hot pain erupts from his abdomen. His vision goes dark for a second and comes back the moment the robot rips its lance out of his stomach.

Kaeya does his Best™ after that, but he’s struggling.

Kaeya’s sword is knocked out of his hand and he’s pushed back by the next attack, landing on the ground and looking up to see the final blow: “Oh, God, not like this--”

Wrio comes over and takes out the robot with a cyro charged left hook like a badass

(he hit it a little harder than he needed, but who’s around to call him out on it)

Moments before knocking out the robot, Wrio had caught sight of Kaeya lying on the ground, pushing himself to the limit to stop the robot on time and get up, get up! Why isn’t he getting up? Come on, Captain, you always get back up, give me a sign I’m not too late--

Kaeya is left awestruck as Wrio turns to the robots that are left and takes them out with a single, well-placed, cyro punch

Wrio sucks in a pained breath when he sees the wound at Kaeya’s abdomen and the dark stain that was steadily growing on Kaeya’s shirt.

Quickly taking off his coat, Wrio bunched it up and pressed it on Kaeya’s abdomen, getting a hiss from the Captain, to slow the bleeding.

It doubles as a blanket because Kaeya doesn’t know why, but he’s so fucking cold all of a sudden and he has a feeling it’s not just from using his vision too much

And he just gets colder by the minute

His injuries aren’t that bad right…?

Wrio then proceeded to pick Kaeya up bridal style

(with one arm, mind you, as he picks up Kaeya’s sword with the other to slide it into his belt before placing his hand under Kaeya’s knees.)

“I--I’m fine now, there’s no need to worry and I ca--”

*Wrio scoops him up with an unreadable expression* “You wouldn’t make it 5 feet without collapsing, so no you’re not walking.”

If Kaeya hadn't been profusely bleeding and on the verge of passing out, he'd have teased Wrio BUT OH MY GOD HES SO FUCKING COOL AND STRONG--

By the time they get to the city, Keaya is barely aware of his surroundings and Wrio is running to the medical center because Kaeya can’t die on his watch.

And Oh Fuck, he runs into Klee who’s in the middle of getting a tour of the city of Fontaine via Freminet and the twins.

To his credit, Wrio does a really good job at keeping the kids from seeing Kaeya’s injuries by adjusting his coat over Kaeya to hide the growing bloodstain (the twins may have also distracted them with a quick magic trick while Wrio was adjusting).

Klee wants them to join, but “Kaeya can’t join because he, ahem, overworked himself, and he’s super tired.”

Kaeya has most definitely collapsed from getting very little sleep after the more intense missions he’s been on for the knights, so Klee is none the wiser.

She tells Freminet and his siblings about the times Kaeya has collapsed, laughing as she recounts the time Albedo helped her draw on Kaeya’s face

As Wrio runs off, the twins steer her and Freminet in the opposite direction

Meanwhile, Kaeya’s eyes are closed, and Archons he’s cold and so, so tired.

Wrio is talking, asking him questions, but Kaeya can’t talk right now. In fact, all he wants to do is go to sleep.

Spoilers: they get to the medical center in time.

Kaeya wakes up to Wrio quietly changing his bandages, a worried expression on his face.

He gives himself away when he hisses at Wrio putting some kind of salve on his wound, who quickly apologizes and starts asking if Kaeya is alright and “it doesn’t hurt too much, right?”

Wrio is quiet, and Kaeya knows he’s angry about something.

Kaeya can't help but feel it's because he did kinda go off on his own without really warning Wrio.

They get into it a little bit, and the argument gets a bit heated.

In his defense, he could have handled himself very well, and it was unusual for the robots to get corrupted like that in the first place.

“The kids were with the twins today, and it was the perfect time to go without having to worry about them getting into danger or blowing up the ruins” and “Hey, you were in the fortress, how did you know?”

Wrio is so quiet until he mentions he had a bad feeling after getting briefed that someone had corrupted a bunch of robots (because of course, Wrio would be sent after the criminal).

“When I saw the kids without you, then the note… I knew you were in the area with the robots and… *Wrio closes his eyes for a moment, trying to force the words out* when I found you, you looked as if you were already halfway to death’s door.”

And oh wow Kaeya didn’t think he was injured that badly.

Wrio tells him he’s seen the aftermath of people recklessly getting hurt (or dying) by doing something stupid, and he doesn’t want to see Klee go through that.

And ouch, does Kaeya feel bad.

They talk it out and Lynette comes by to make sure Kaeya is okay while Lyney is keeping the kids occupied.

They cover the bandages with one of Kaeya’s shirts before Lynette brings the kids around to see him, Klee glumly saying she’s sad because she can’t draw on his face while he’s awake.

Kaeya is forced to bed rest by Wrio until he's fully healed under the pretense that “he just needs a lot of sleep.”

Living rent-free in my mind, let me know if you want the full fic

This is just an outline, imagine what a full fleshed 20k fic would look like (you should see the Kaithem and Cynari outlines I have…)

I’ll type it up for whoever wants it :’

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holybananaoafshoe · 6 months

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Take a look at this amazing comic by Crimson-chains!!!

Very excited to finally officially announce Star Crossed is being released next year on February 6th! :D You can pre-order it on Barnes and Nobles or Amazon! Gonna be at bookstores and stuff, wah, so hyped! >u< I'd also be really grateful for reblogs, haha! <3

#i cant tell you how much i live this comic #im so excited for the print edition #like as soon as i can you can bet your beautiful ass im pre ordering ir

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holybananaoafshoe · 6 months

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✨️Team Dynamics ✨️

Get ready for some angst

Tired Cryo Dads 6/8

Wrio takes Kaeya to a magic show (front row seats bbyy), the kids get to go backstage and get the VIP treatment with Lyney and Lynette

At one point in the show, there’s a trick with fire, and it gets uncomfortably close to Kaeya

Cue the silent panic attack and Wrio noticing the quiet, strangled noise Kaeya makes when the heat of the fire gets close to their faces as well as the absolute death grip the guy has on the arm rests

Wrio manages to get Kaeya to a quiet area to help calm him down

Meanwhile, Kaeya is definitely having flashbacks to the night Diluc had nearly killed him

He’s a mess, hand over his eyepatch, and the other clutching his shirt where old burn scars lay hidden underneath

Wrio is really good at calming people down, like really good, and he gives great hugs.

Hey, it comes with the job

He’s had to calm down a lot of people throughout his career (sometimes it’s with a hug, sometimes it's with a punch)

He doesn’t ask Kaeya questions, just makes sure he knows he’s safe and that he’s not in whatever bad memory that’s replaying in his mind

And please tell him if the hug is too much because he heard that it helps, but he wasn’t sure

It helps more than Wrio knows

If Kaeya cries a little, Wrio doesn’t mention it, just makes sure to coach Kaeya in a breathing exercise

By the time Kaeya calms down, the show is over and they have to collect the kids

Klee doesn’t know why Kaeya is upset, but she toddles over and gives him a big hug, which helps hide Kaeya’s shaking hands

He picks her up and holds her, hugging her tightly, and doesn’t put her down until they get to their hotel later

Lyney definitely noticed something was wrong, and is apologizing profusely when he and his sister are able to come over

“I would have never done the trick if I had known” and “I promise I would have directed it somewhere else, it’ll never happen again and--”

Kaeya says it’s okay (he's definitely not okay, but that's besides the point)

He knows Lyney didn’t mean any harm, but, honestly, he wants to go home, maybe have a drink, and go to bed

They all part ways, Wrio promising to check in once he makes sure the siblings get back home safe

He definitely did not go to bed

Wrio finds him outside of the hotel after walking the trio siblings back home

They have a long conversation, and Kaeya spills his backstory a bit, leaving out the whole khaenri'ah part, and just saying he spilled a secret to his brother

Wrio is a good listener and a good advice giver because it seems they’re on better terms. Surely, whatever Kaeya’s secret was, Diluc doesn’t hate him for it. It was just delivered at a bad time

The talk helps Kaeya feel better. They stay outside until the sun is up, and the spark knight is ready to go exploring

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holybananaoafshoe · 6 months

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✨️Team Dynamics ✨️

Tired Cyro Dads 5/8

One day Kaeya and Klee go into the Fortress with Wrio for a tour, and Kaeya nearly has a fucking stroke trying to keep Klee from accidentally blowing the place up.

He doesn’t know how Albedo does it half the time--sure he does live on Dragonspine so if Klee blows something up it’s not like there’s anyone around that would be hurt

…unless we count poor Mika who has to remake the maps anytime Klee’s explosions change the landscape

Kaeya may look calm and cool all of the time, but internally he’s freaking the fuck out. His blood pressure has never been higher and honestly, if there wasn’t a child around, he’d have a drink on him.

He feels trapped down there, and that’s on childhood trauma

Wrio is having a blast, pun fully intended, during the tour, making some dry jokes here and there about the structure integrity

“oh I heard it’s raining on the surface, now if we feel rain down here that’s not a good sign :)”

He definitely somehow drips water on Kaeya’s head after Klee bonks into something a little too hard and absolutely loses his shit when Kaeya screeches and jumps several feet in the air

Cue a confused Klee, who has no idea what’s going on, but Wrio says it’s okay and he’s the best! So she trusts it’s okay, she’s not sure why Kaeya is on the floor though…

It’s alright, she gives him Dodoco to hold onto for safe keeping, which does help ease his mind slightly

(mostly because he’s not entirely sure if Dodoco is a stuffed animal or a bomb….knowing Alice it could be either)

They both like to mess with people for shits and giggles. It helps the day go by, you know

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holybananaoafshoe · 6 months

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The people have spoken: you'll get the spooky one shot 😉

Halloween is over, but, UH, I was kinda working on a Wirya fic, but work got a lil crazy

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holybananaoafshoe · 6 months

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Modern AU: Halloween 🎃 1/2

It’s way after Halloween, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?? I’m happy you guys are here, and what would the spooky season be without a, hastily written, one shot? Here’s the first half for you guys!

Pairing: Kaeya and Wriothesley :)

TLDR: What’s Halloween without a party, a ghost hunt, and some well-meaning shenanigans?

“Please, Albedo, it’ll just be for tonight!”

“No.”

“I’ll do anything,” Kaeya pleaded, “I’ll do all of the taste testing for the next month.”

The man in question was lounging languidly on the couch of their shared apartment, feet propped up on the coffee table, and absentmindedly watching some kind of documentary on cryptids across the United States. A large bowl of candy sat on the round end table next to the couch, a few discarded wrappers laying on Albedo's lap as he watched the documentary.

The living room was dark, the only source of light coming from the various lit candles around the apartment and the glowing TV. Small pumpkins that were crudely carved by Kaeya and Klee littered the counter top, while the more intricately carved ones Albedo had carved (as well as a few he carved for Klee) were displayed on the balcony.

Their neat apartment had a few cobwebs strewn about and rubber bats hanging from the ceiling. Their kitchenette had some small test tubes and beakers with water and food coloring in them. A few had smoke drifting from the tops to pool on the counter--courtesy of Albedo, who took a few leftover dry ice chunks from work. Ghosts hung in the hallway that led to their bedrooms and the bathroom. They had painstakingly hung up their fairy lights on the ceiling of the hallway in an attempt to make the ghosts seem a little less scary. Poor Klee had gotten quite the scare late one night while she was sleeping over because she forgot they had hung them up, that is until a passing car's headlights cast the ghosts' eerie shadows on the wall.

Kaeya liked to dub the hallway “Specters Crevice,” but it seems others did not share his sentiment as they’d wrinkle their noses or roll their eyes at the cheesy name. All, besides Klee, who had giggled and hung up a small ghost that looked a lot like Dodoco. The name, lights, and the ghost resembling Dodoco had thankfully helped ease the young girl's mind.

It was their night off from the Knights of Flavorus, which was a small bakery owned by Alice. The local bakery wound up expanding relatively fast with the help of Albedo’s scientific ways of combining flavors and the owner’s own to-die-for recipes. Albedo was the head food and flavor chemist of the company and managed a small team that would come up with wacky flavors that made all the employees a little nervous to try.

Kaeya had known both Alice and Albedo long before the bakery began. Alice had been close to Crepus, his adoptive father, before he had passed away. She visited so often that he and Diluc have taken to calling her “Aunt Alice.” Since Crepus's passing, Alice had taken Diluc and Kaeya under her wing, treating them like her own children and helping them through the hardships they endured after the funeral. The family held a special place in Kaeya’s heart, they took him in after he and Diluc had gotten into a nasty fight in the bar. The brothers had exchanged harsh words--words neither of them truly meant, but left emotional scars all the same. One of the long-time bartenders broke them up and let Kaeya leave early, just an hour after midnight. Wouldn’t you know, that would be the same night a drunk driver hit Kaeya in a head-on collision as he was driving towards Aunt Alice’s house.

He lost his right eye and his brother that night.

The next following days in the hospital were…ones he’d rather forget to be honest. Surprisingly Diluc would visit, which would always end up in a yelling match that Aunt Alice or nurses would rush to break up. During those rough weeks of healing and physical therapy and searching for a job (and trying not to think about his eye), she had let him stay with her. Aunt Alice bought the bakery just a few months after his accident and hired Kaeya as one of the bakery’s managers. After a lot of deliberation and discussions and arguments with Diluc, he started work at the Knights of Flavorus and got an apartment with Albedo. He was often found upfront working his customer service ‘charms’ as Lisa, their accountant, would say, or in the back decorating cakes.

Thankfully, Kaeya and Diluc are at least on speaking terms now. Sometimes, they can even stand each other long enough for Kaeya to help out at the bar or to sit through an event with Aunt Alice and her family.

Nonetheless, Albedo was not one to dress up for Halloween, often going with whatever costume Kaeya or Klee wore or just donning his lab coat and grabbing some kind of prop he dug out from Kaeya’s closet. Tonight, he sported an oversized white hoodie that had swirling gold embroidery on the arms with stars sprinkled in, a pair of navy sweats, and fluffy Dodoco slippers Alice had gifted to him last Christmas.

Kaeya had on his costume and a face full of makeup, ready for a night out in the town.

Only, he had forgotten he was supposed to take Klee out to the annual Halloween bash in the park this year. The bash is hosted by the town where various businesses open up elaborately decorated booths ranging from food to games to entertainment. It was one of the biggest holiday celebrations in the town, right next to Christmas. The winners of the booth decorating contest won bragging rights as well as the ability to pick where their booth would be located at the next year's bash.

After the bash, the streets in town would be closed off for a few hours so kids can run around and go trick-or-treating. Everything considered, the turn out for the event was huge and most of the employees at the Knights of Flavorus worked in shifts at their booth.

It was the first Halloween either has had off for…a while. Usually the two spent the night covering each other's breaks at the Knight's booth so they could spend a little time with Klee. Yet, here they were, spending the few hours before the Halloween Bash to get their costumes on and goodie bags for the kids ready, and Kaeya just realized his predicament.

Albedo slowly tore his eyes away from the TV and looked over at Kaeya, raising an eyebrow at his costume. “Last time I covered for you, you got arrested.”

“And I got a cute boyfriend out of it, your point?”

Last Halloween, Kaeya had gotten into a small fight with a customer that resulted in both him and the customer getting detained and taken to the nearby police station. He wasn’t even working for the Knights of Flavorus, he was helping his brother bartend. Technically, he was supposed to be at the barkery, but Albedo had covered hsi shift after Diluc had called Kaeya up right around the time the Halloween Bash began, asking if there was any way he could help. His long-time bartenders had called in just before the bar opened: one had gotten sick and the other had to rush their child to the emergency room (word on the street was the child had grabbed a flaming marshmallow with his bare hands, apparently trying to throw it into their cup), leaving Diluc alone at the bar. Kaeya couldn't exactly leave his brother to fend for himself, he knew how busy the Halloween party at the bar got and then the absolute insanity when the after party started. (It was always the best party of the year, fondly remembered by all those who participated until the next rolls around).

It wasn’t his fault and, if it says anything, Diluc and the police agree that Kaeya was not at fault.

Listen, what was he supposed to do when he kept getting orders for angle shots? He and Diluc made sure to keep an eye out for the creep. Unfortunately, with how packed it was, neither seemed to be able to spot the man. His breaking point was when Barbra, a member of a local band that often played live music at the bar, had shakily come up to him and tell him that it was Albert. At that point, Kaeya had left the bar to hunt the man down. Can you blame him? He was getting sick and tired of throwing Albert out for creeping on girls and following Barbra around the parking lot. No matter what he or Diluc tried, nothing seemed to keep Albert away.

When he finally caught Albert’s ass, he made sure to get between Albert and the person he was pursuing. Of course, when kicking Albert out peacefully didn’t work, Kaeya had tried to forcefully kick him out. One thing led to another, and Albert wound up breaking a bottle of wine over Kaeya’s head and used the bottle as a makeshift weapon. At some point in the fight, Kaeya had been able to wrestle the bottle away and subdue Albert until the police arrived.

Imagine Kaeya’s surprise when the police arrested both of them. He supposed it had been a year or two since he’s worked as security, but he thought the local police would at the very least remember all the times he had called the station about an unruly drunk.

He didn’t exactly regret fighting Albert, the man had it coming for a long time and a small part of him was satisfied that he was the one to put the man behind bars, but he did regret having to sit in an interrogation room for the rest of Halloween without spending any time with Klee. He sat in the cold interrogation room for who knows how long--his head bleeding, feeling a little woozy, and overall reevaluating his life choices--until Wriothesley had walked in. It’s cheesy to say, but Kaeya’s breath was taken away at the sight of the officer. How could he not be infatuated when the officer scrolled in, a slight grin tugging at his lips, and began to tease Kaeya about the fight?

He wound up doing community service for a few weeks, but it was so worth it.

For one, Albert was officially banned from the bar and Diluc was able to get a restraining order of sorts to keep him off the bar's property. Secondly, it also gave Kaeya more time with Wriothesley. Eventually, he had worked up the nerve to ask the other out for dinner, who had teasingly said he would take up his offer once he was finished with community service.

“My point,” Albedo said, pointing a Crunch bar at him, “is that last year, you were beside yourself for missing out on spending time with Klee.”

“I know," Kaeya sighed, "it's just, I can do the Halloween Bash, but Wriothesley and I wanted to go to the after party together and…"

"That's when trick-or-treating starts," Albedo finished for him.

Kaeya nodded and silence filled the space between them as Albedo thoughtfully munched on the candy. After a moment, Albedo looked over at him and pointed his half-eaten crunch bar at Kaeya: “You know, you still owe me for knocking a whole tub of peppercorns into batter when you and Wriothesley tried to fu--”

“OOOKAAY we agreed to never bring that up again,” Kaeya interrupted, his face turning a nice shade of red.

Albedo took an aggressive bite of his candy, the loud snap making Kaeya cringe, and threw his arms up as if to say: what do you want me to do, when you haven't touched a single cake pop I've made?

The Peppercorn Incident™ happened when Kaeya and Wriothesley first started dating. Let’s just say Wriothesley's after hours visit to the Knights of Flavorus with Kaeya to pick up a set of keys had turned into an impromptu cake decorating lesson in the large walk in cooler that got a tad flavorful, if you will. In their passion, they had knocked over a large container of peppercorn into leftover dough (who knew plastic wrap was so flimsy?).

After knocking the peppercorn over, they decided it would probably be best to continue elsewhere, so Kaeya cleaned up (he wasn’t a monster, thank you, people make food on those tables) and they left. Only, he had forgotten to throw out the leftover batter, and Albedo had been the lucky soul who had decided to look at the security footage to find the culprit. Thankfully, Albedo deleted the footage and they both agreed never to speak of it again, so long as Kaeya taste tested anything Albedo made for the Halloween Bash.

You can imagine how much Kaeya had wanted to yeet himself into the abyss when Albedo had dragged him into dry storage and confronted him about it.

Kaeya can only imagine what would have happened if Sucrose, or, God forbid, Aunt Alice had found the footage.

Small mercies and all of that.

Regardless, Kaeya didn’t mean to avoid taste testing things for Albedo. Between helping Diluc out with the bar, getting the Knights of Flavorus’s Halloween booth items, and splitting his spare time between Klee and Wriothesley he hasn’t been able to pop by the labs. Usually, Kayea doesn't overwork himself--he prides himself on his ability to balance his time between work and life--but before he had realized, he found himself committing to setting up the bakery’s booth for the Halloween Bash and helping at Angel's Share all so he could get tonight off.

He wasn't proud to say that Albedo and Lisa had to send him home early a few times (nearly collapsing at the counter and throwing an entire tray of cupcakes away instead of the broken piping bag wasn't his brightest moments), calling Wriothesley to come pick him up and drive him back home. One day, Albedo took one look at him, picked up his phone, and told Jean Kayea wasn't coming to work--all while maintaining eye contact. Don't get Kayea wrong, he was thankful for his coworkers (if he was being honest, they were all more friends than coworkers) and without them he wouldn't be half as alert as he was currently.

However, Albedo hasn’t summoned him to the labs once. Instead he just set random cake pops out and about the apartment, and they weren’t even weird flavors, they were vanilla. Perhaps he didn't call him over because he could see how exhausted Kaeya was, but he was fully capable of making caffeinated cake pops.

Albedo can deny it all he wants, but he swears he's seen something about it in Albedo's recipes.

Not only that, but Albedo occasionally enjoyed giving them things to taste test that were unusual, stifling a laugh when they made faces at the flavors. So to say that Kaeya would have been the perfect subject for unusual flavor testing, tired and unassuming as he's been the past few weeks, would be an understatement.

The perfectly normal and delicious cake pops were odd, suspicious even, and Kaeya had halfway expected one of them to have an interesting candy coating. Except none of them ever did.

(No matter how much Albedo liked tricking others into tasting something odd, he wasn't cruel. Not that he didn't try to make something for Kaeya, he just felt bad pushing his unholy creations onto his tired roommate. Besides, Kaeya has been working his ass off to try to get Halloween off to spend time with Klee. Even Albedo had to admit his efforts were enduring, so maybe he made Kaeya's favorite cake pop flavor to help him feel better after a rough night at the bar. He even made a few for Wriothesley, who would drive Kaeya home. He'd spend the night and cook Kaeya’s favorite breakfast the next morning. Wriothesley would stay over more to make sure Kaeya would actually go to bed rather than work on finding things for the bakery’s Halloween booth.)

So here they were.

Kaeya shuffled his feet, the red shoes of his costume squeaking on the floor. "Listen, I'll make good on that and I'll make sure to help keep nosey cooks and customers away from the labs during the holidays."

Albedo hummed and stated: "I believe you will…and I'll come up with something you can help me with for this later, so go have fun on your date."

Kaeya let out a victorious whoop, crossing the distance between himself and his roommate to give him a sloppy hug. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

Albedo laughed and patted his friend's back: "Yeah, yeah, don't get too ahead of yourself."

Kaeya went back into the kitchen, buying himself with packing up a small goodie bag for Klee and another for Wriothesley's adopted cousin Freminet, humming a song to himself happily.

He paused, his hand hovering between the popcorn balls and Halloween baggies, suddenly realizing: "There's no way you're only wearing a hoodie to Halloween."

"I didn't have time to get a costume." Albedo called from the living room.

"Oh, we'll make you a costume."

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