how-to-fry-your-pescado

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

I don’t want to let go of my coping mechanisms even tho I get myself hurt physically all the time because of them.

#ed #self distructive #alcohlism #depression #confessions

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

Jungkook and Jimin in [MMA 2020] 내 아티스트의 이중생활

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

Can someone please tell me what’s wrong with me?

I don’t know how to explain what I’m feeling. I don’t feel good and I can’t say I feel bad either. I want to make myself feel good, I want that relief even if it’s just temporary. Drinking does that to me and I crave it more than I care to admit.

I find myself staring my own reflection in the mirror and thinking what’s wrong with me. Some people are depressed but this doesn’t feel like it. I don’t feel getting angry at anything, I’m not frustrated, I’m not scared or afraid. Usually I feel socially anxious but when I feel like this that goes away too.

I try and make myself cry. Just to let it out. But it wont happen, most of the time. Instead of crying regularly, I get panic attacks and cry then. I don’t know if they are really panic attacks, I don’t feel like I’m dying but I don’t understand why I can’t control it I just loose it and it feels like I’m insane.

#depression #anxiety #alone #sad #blue #thoughts #diary #lonely #numb #numbness #ramble

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

we are together bulletproof

we are forever bulletproof

#7yearswithBTS

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

did he have to push his hair back like that

bonus:

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

I have a fire inside of me.

With some things it’s flaming hot because I feel passion and love and excitement. At the same time there’s someone constantly pouring water into the flame.

I can never be in complete sadness but I can never be happy.

#depressed #quote #feelings #alone #blue #darkness #anxiety #passion

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

Mishapocalypse 2020

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

I feel so heavy. I don’t know what is happening. I’m positive I haven’t really gained any weight since I exercise daily and don’t eat any junk food (last week I did but I’m really trying to get it through my head that a few times can’t make my weight go up that much). I’m slowly restricting more but I don’t know where my will power is these days. I’m not at my home, with my parents cuz of the quarantine so everything’s a bit harder. I don’t have a scale that works so that makes me even more anxious. I guess my “bad eating habits” were worse than I thought.

#ed #restricting #not eating #proana #not-pro-just-using-tags- #thin #motivation #ana #heavy #big

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

Anyone wanna be socially distant with me?

#ed #restricting #ana #eating #not eating #quarantine #thin #thinspo #allthemtags #social

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

when polo offered to pay for ander's cancer treatment and ander said "what country do you think this is I already have access to the best health care without being rich" they really went and roasted the entire US public health services lmao......

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

The stress is overloading me and I can feel it pushing me to the ground. It’s either stay down with your eyes open or take the red pill and see yourself flying high in the sky.

#depression #anxiety #binge #ed #restriction #skinny #thin #sad #blue #ana #proana

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

Do I…. Do I use my instrument for this?

[how-to-fry-your-pescado]

I’m so done. So broken and tired. I don’t know what is normal and what should be tolerated.

I know I could love life, I’ve been close once or twice. I have things to keep me busy and distracted, but nothing real.

I have no one to talk because I keep thinking that I can’t be reliable on other people. I’ve come this far on my own I just need to keep pushing. Even tho I’m pushing so hard that I’m fading away in the process.

#alone #depression #thoughts #empty #numb #anxiety #ed #sad #dark #lonely #broken