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blacksapphhicmaddonna · 6 months

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CHAPTER ONE - WHAT I HAVE TO DO.

a/n: hey y'all! so, I tried to post this in response to the anon who asked for a snippet but I saved it as a draft and Tumblr ate it😭 SO THIS IS DEDICATED TO YOU, ANON, WHOEVER YOU ARE!! sorry babes!💔💖💖💖💖

its been a minute since I've written anything fully, this was fun!!! as always, please ignore any grammar/syntax/spelling. I proof read it but you feel me. I'm super excited to be writing something so long and multi chaptered and definitely out of my comfort zone! am I an action girly now? LMFAO but anyway, I'm super open to any feedback and 👀 as always, if you wanna see sum, say sum.

anyway, I love my science gays and I will stan shuriri forever. this is pretty much all angst at this point❤️‍🩹, but I truly hope you enjoy LMFAOOO. lmk how you feel.💗 (and yes, I love a good flashback real bad and ima do it every time if I can. not too much on me LMFAO)

✮ taglist: @mybonafidefeelings@zeezeecave@gr00vyminibus@lppriceisright@darkangelchronicles@princessmel-1995@xenaizogie@nanii2x, and tagging a few folks that enjoyed the sneak peak and a few shuriri/shuri/riri folks who might! @karimwillia @inmyheadimobsessed@mal-urameshi@somethingcleaverandwhitty@imjusthere2readbruv@imagineandwrite there's more but my computer glitching so we gonna get this show on the road! lmk if you'd like to join the taglist or check the link in my tagged post! love y'all, muah

✮ word count: 11,193

✮ panther divider: @firefly-graphics

✮ some of the xhosa translations are from @iinkonde! here's where you can find some of their amazing resources: 1 2 3

Shuri paced the room that seemed to be growing smaller by the millisecond around her, searching for something - anything - inside of the brain most people considered the smartest in the universe to offer the scientist in front of her. She found nothing but the desperation she had been pushing down since the moment they met.

A desperation that mirrored the effects of the herb she had reproduced, also made from the desperation to save something that she felt was slipping through her fingers at the time. Just like the herb had found its way through her body when she first took it, this feeling spread from her throat as she choked when their eyes met as she pushed herself into the dorm room she was once again standing in. Down to her chest, pulling heart strings she didn’t know she had. Plucking them in a rhythm that felt intrinsic, ancestral, almost painful in the way that they made everything feel superimposed. She resisted, but she felt her toes and she felt her finger tips and she felt the curls framing her face dance above her eyes ever so gently. It spread through every atom that comprised the panther and she could barely breathe. She felt everything and she felt nothing, like she was sinking in an ocean of clouds. She could barely look at the woman who was staring back at her with a look of confusion, and an equal desperation that she couldn't explain.

Shuri still had nothing to offer in terms of speech. She paced at a speed that had only just registered as super fucking fast, clearly adding to the concern building in Riri's eyes.

"Shuri-" Riri started, but couldn't even try to finish as her voice had triggered the awaiting and building eruption in Shuri that it always did. Riri, if she did anything to Shuri, she made her feel things she wasn't used to feeling.

"Anything you want, just name it. It's yours. I'll make it happen. I'll build it myself. Just please don't do this. Please." Shuri froze in her place, finding herself begging for something she couldn't explain. She knew she was almost yelling at the other woman, which she would never do but she couldn't find the part of her that could compose herself. She was thankful for the kimoyo beads she had scattered in the room when she entered, enabling a silencing mode and cutting through anything that the government had tapped in Riri's room.

Riri froze too, only moving to fumble with her fingers nervously. She didn't have anything to offer the panther, the queen standing in front of her. She didn't have anything to comfort her friend. The woman she loved more than she could explain. More than almost anything.

"I don't... I don't want anything from you, Shuri... We both knew this day was coming. You had to have thought about it. I thought you were.. I don’t know... It almost felt like-"

"Please, Ri. Please. Just find something and I'll do it. I'll make it myself if I have to. Please just find something else."

"I don't want... I don't understand, Shuri. We only talked about this like twice, I didn't even think you cared that much or even had time to care about it... or me, really. Just... lets just sit down for a second." Riri tried to redirect, trying to give herself time to figure out what was going on. She felt her mind trying to run back through memories and conversations the two had shared in the past year and some change, but it was few and far between that they ever really had time to talk about their lives in depth lately. At first, they talked a lot after they had finally reconnected. They had even spent a few nights together. But lately, Shuri had been working a lot and it seemed like their connection was running dry. Riri had shared her plans a few months ago and hadn't really heard much back from the woman standing in front of her looking like she was fighting a battle she wasn't sure she'd win. Riri had committed herself to this, to showing up and doing what she felt she needed to do to make up for all the ruin she had caused - or at least what she thinks she caused. And now Shuri was trying to offer her a chance out of it. She didn't know what to do or what to think. That's something she felt often with the panther, she figured out. She had zoned out for only a split second before Shuri was grabbing her wrists and looking in her eyes.

"Riri, I'm begging you." Shuri stared into the Iron Heart's eyes, searching for something she knew she was missing. Something she needed the way she needed air, she felt. Riri searched back, trying to decipher something Shuri wasn't ready to let her see.

"Shuri, you know I feel responsible... But, I just.. I don't understand what's going on. What's wrong? Please just talk to me. It's okay." Riri tried to pull them closer, tried to grab the Panther's hand but her grip was too tight around her wrists. Shuri relaxed it, she hadn't intentionally been holding on so tight but she wasn't ready to let go. She's never been ready to let go of who she loves. She saw that same resolute look in Riri's eyes that was always there when she was sure about something. It broke something in Shuri that she knew she couldn't mend on her own. One final try, she told herself.

"I will give you anything under the sun. Please just don't go to them. Don’t go to him. I- I know you're trying to help and change things for the better, and you will. But not like this. Not until it's safe. He will find you, Riri. He will do anything to get to you and to get back at me. You know this and you still choose to go? You don’t have to make this easy for him. We can figure this out a different way. Please. I will give you access to all the technology Wakanda has to offer, just please find something else to focus on, to take place of this. Please."

Riri tried to pull her closer again but the panther moved back, sending a shiver of rejection up Riri's spine.

"I don't want anything from you, Shuri... I just want you. I- I mean I just want you to-"

Shuri felt her body getting hot and somehow freezing at the same time. Riri just wanted her? But she also wanted to go on this suicide mission, which is what it was regardless of what Riri thought of it. She fought back the defensiveness she felt crawling up her throat like it always did when she was hurt. She didn't want to lash out on Riri, she only wanted to protect her. She only wanted her to be safe, alive. She only wanted her. But it was to no avail. She felt the ferocious beast pull itself through her. She scorned herself as her words burned their way through her skin, landing on Riri's.

"You just want whatever you want. You just want to fight whatever moral war you have going on because you're the one who survived! You would give up your life for what? For who? Not for my mother! Not for me!"

Riri hadn't noticed the tears stinging down her cheeks until she saw the ones pouring out of Shuri's. It was something she had never seen before. She had seen Shuri lash out, though. She knew this was just the first wall of defense the panther had when she felt hurt, afraid, abandoned. She couldn't take this personally, though she had to fight back the sting of the words as they came at her. She reached out to try and touch the woman in front of her.

"Shuri, please. Let's just ta-"

"What?! Sit and talk? For what? For you to tell me again why you have to do this, why you have to go and die? Do you care so little for me? For yourself?"

"You know that's not true!"

"Why wouldn't it be true?! Ungayenza njani le nto kum!?"

"Please just listen to me! I don't know what's going on but we can talk about it! I'm right here, I'm right here!"

"But you won't be after this! You don't have to do this! Just let me try, let me show you that there's other things to give you purpose, there’s other ways we can handle this! PLEASE!" Shuri felt herself starting to cave in, her chest becoming a cavern filled with the screams of the orphaned girl inside of her. The girl who needed her family. The girl who couldn't save her brother. The girl who was held back from her mother as she drowned. The woman who loves women, specifically the woman in front of her who was planning to give herself up. She couldn't keep it together. She couldn't breathe. She couldn't think.

"That's not for you to decide, Shuri!" Riri shot back, starting to feel the same layer of armor pull itself over her. She didn't like being yelled at. It triggered something in her that she herself had pushed back as far as it would go. She just needed to get Shuri to listen to her.

"I don't care! You can't do this Riri!"

"Please stop yelling at me!" Riri gave in, covering her ears and turning her back to the panther, who felt herself go still. She hadn't meant to unleash this part of herself. She felt embarrassment mixing with her desperation, afraid she had only made things worse. Who was she to be trying to control the actions of a woman she only met a little over a year ago? Who she was just friends with, and barely that if you based it off what normal friendships looked like. They rarely even spoke for longer than a few minutes every couple days and that wasn’t even true anymore. Shuri scorned herself for the time she hadn’t spent with her, for the time she had been forced to spend trying to fix, defend or save her country. She resented her royal blood now more than ever, wishing she could be nothing more than a girl again. Maybe a student. Maybe just different. Shuri felt herself starting to crack, she felt like she would disintegrate if she stood there any longer. She had done enough damage. She and Wakanda and the Talokan had put Riri through enough and she knew that. She could see why Riri would think this guilt was hers to bare but Shuri knew better, knew more secrets. She knew that her father and his father and so on hadn’t handled things right, and no matter the good T’Challa had tried to do - maybe he didn’t do it right either. So now it laid in her hands, forced once again to stand in the way of something she wasn’t ready for. She felt bad for herself, but she felt worse for Riri. She wishes she had never sent her home with the beads, that they had never touched hands, that they had never even met. Maybe if no one ever knew about Vibranium, no one would be trying to take it. Or maybe if the world had always known, if her ancestors had done things differently, this wouldn’t be Riri’s life. She was part of the lost tribe, as N’Jadaka would call it. Maybe he was right. She didn’t know what to think, but she also knew who she was, herself. She was the most powerful person on the surface world and she was the Queen of the most powerful nation in the world. And she was in love, helplessly, with Riri Williams. She would not let her go again.

"I am sorry for coming here and making you upset." Shuri said blankly, masking any emotions she had just shattered into the room as best as she could to regain any self control she had left.

Riri turned around, tears still swelling in her eyes. She hiccuped and it made Shuri's heart pound.

"I-it's okay. I just don't like b-being yelled at. Can we just sit and talk?"

Shuri nodded, knowing Riri needed a minute. Riri turned to grab a blanket off her bed to wrap herself in as she took a seat on the floor in front of her bed. She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths before motioning to Shuri to sit next to her. Shuri stared at her for a moment too long, before kneeling down next to her. They sat in silence that wasn't comfortable for the first time in a long time. Neither missed this feeling, the feeling of such uncertainty between them. Sure, it was always there, biting at the backs of their minds and hearts. But they had both worked hard to be comfortable with just having what they had. But now more than ever, neither was sure what was really going on. Shuri mirrored Riri, taking a few deep breaths. Riri felt herself relax, misreading the quiet sigh Shuri let out.

"Are we okay? I don't want us to fight. I just... need you to help me understand why you're so upset. It didn't seem like you even really cared about this. I know you've been busy with what you have going on so I just figured this... I.. wasn't really on your radar anymore."

Shuri stayed silent, fighting that feeling nudging her.

"Please say something." Riri pleaded quietly after a few too many more moments of silence. She couldn't stand it. Neither could Shuri. She needed to escape. Get out of the room, out of America. She needed to run and scream and break something. She needed to kill Namor. That was her only option, once again. She knew it would come. She knew the fate of her country would be in the air again, and part of her knew she shouldn’t do it. Equal parts yes and no. Blood on either hand, regardless of what choice she made. But she also knew that Riri's life was once again in question and there was only one answer Shuri would accept. She would deal with the aftermath the same way she had been. She would accept whatever came. She knew she wasn't thinking clearly, that maybe she would be exiled or worse, but she also knew she couldn't live with herself if Riri wasn't alive tomorrow, and that was enough for her right now. If Riri wouldn't listen, then there was only one choice.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you, Riri. It won't ever happen again."

Riri was startled at the sincerity in the Panther's voice. She was confused why that was what Shuri felt she had to focus on in the midst of whatever the hell was going on.

"It's okay, I promise. I'm not mad at you for yelling at me. I'm just confused..."

"It's not okay. This, whatever you're planning, whatever he's planning... None of this is okay." Shuri said, pinching between her eyes as she tried to swallow the same beast from just a few minutes ago.

"Shuri... it's not like before. It's not about him. It's not even just about what happened in Wakanda. You know I'm Iron Heart. You knew I was going to start doing these things at some point. Missions that weren’t just flying around Chicago and Boston stopping robberies. And you know that something has to be done. And I can’t let this go on again when we all know it’s my fault.” Riri sighed. “We all know it is. So, please just try to hear me..."

"I have always heard you, Riri."

Riri digested that sentence with a gulp. She replied after a moment.

"Then let me hear you, for once. Tell me why you're here. Tell me why you're reacting like this. Tell me who you are and what you're feeling. Let me in, Shuri." She said, reaching out to grab Shuri's hand again. The Panther's hand was hot, almost burning. She didn't pull away this time.

"I'm here because I lo-.. Because I won't let this happen." Shuri caught herself before she said something she couldn't explain. Riri looked into Shuri's eyes with a pleading, less sure look. Shuri couldn't hold it this time. She couldn't freeze. She couldn't tell Riri. She reminded herself what happens every time she loves someone. She reminded herself of what she was capable of and what needed to be done. Regardless if Riri ever shared her feelings or not, she would swear her life to protecting the woman until the day she met the ancestors and maybe after if she could. She would do whatever it took, every time, no matter what, she resigned to herself. She squeezed Riri's hand.

"What're you gonna do? Lock me in my room, Shuri? I don't get what's going on!" Riri pleaded.

"I would never. You are not a prisoner or someone I want to control. You are free to do as you please, just as I am. Please understand that much."

"What does that mean... Wait, please don't go!" Riri tugged back at Shuri's hand again as the Panther got up to leave. Shuri looked down at their hands touching, taking in every second that their skin touched. She remembered what it felt like to reconnect after a long time apart. She wishes she could live in it like she had before. She brought their foreheads together and closed her eyes.

"I will protect you with every part of me. The cost will never be too much."

"Shuri, please don't do what I think you're about to do..." Riri pulled Shuri's hands into hers and brought them to the sides of their faces. They were so close they could feel each other's breath on their lips. Riri prayed in her head that Shuri would listen to her, knowing the strength and power the woman in front of her wielded. Shuri choked out a pained laugh before kissing Riri's forehead and pulling away, taking in the scent of Ghanian Shea Butter and the sweet scent Riri always had.

"Andizukuphulukana nawe. Impilo yami ngeke ibe lutho ngaphandle kwakho, Riri Williams."

Before Riri could open her eyes, the Black Panther was gone, the sound of a closing door shaking Riri to her core. She felt like she was in shock, having nothing to do but curl into a ball and pull the blanket around her body, covering her face as she let the rest of the tears fall silently. She laid there for what felt like an eternity until she heard a familiar voice call out to her.

"Miss Williams?" Riri jumped up, running around her room tracking down the voice. She picked up a purple and black kimoyo bead and held it up, suddenly seeing several others connect like magnets from across the other corners of the room.

"Griot?!" Riri both yelled and whispered.

"Hello, Miss Williams. Are you feeling alright?" Griot asked as the AI began taking a scan of her body to check her vitals.

"I've been better... what's going on? Why are you here? Not that it's not nice to... well you get what I mean!"

"It seems you have suffered a panic attack of sorts. Please get some water and take a seat before I proceed."

Riri rolled her eyes with a tired huff, giving in because she knew Griot wouldn't budge until she obliged. She grabbed a half empty bottle of water from her desk and sat back down near her bed, pulling the blanket up around her. She suddenly felt the absence of Shuri in her space and fought back the tears threatening to make way through her as she pulled the bracelet on, watching it activate. She had felt this way before, but it was different now.

"Feeling better, Miss Williams?"

"Just Riri is fine, and I guess. Can you explain what's going on now, please Griot?"

"Yes, Miss Riri." Griot replied as a hologram of Stark Tech floated in front of the scientist. She felt even more confused.

"Why are you showing me Stark Tech?"

"The panther has created and assigned your own AI for you, it's name is VIV. It is nearly identical to the JARVIS, or Vision, that Tony Stark had. It has been being developed for over a year, and seems to have just finished."

"What the fu-"

"The Panther also has an updated version of your vibranium Iron Heart suit on it's way to your lab location, or garage currently. She has given you access to me as well, with some restrictions. She has instructed me to inform you of this when the AI download is complete."

Riri sat in even more shock than she was in before. She was even more confused about Shuri's intentions now. More confused about her feelings, than anything. She replayed the words the panther had said to her before she left, she knew some Xhosa but it wasn’t great.

"Can you translate what Shuri said to me in Xhosa before she left, Griot?" Riri asked, hoping for some clarity. Griot calculated for a moment, before answering.

"It would seem I am not permitted to complete that task at this time, Miss Riri."

Riri felt a pang of frustration rise in her, as she let out a laugh.

"Of course not... Can you tell me where the panther is right now?"

Griot took a moment again before answering.

"The Queen was on her way back towards Wakanda as of her last status, but it would seem she has powered off her location devices. Would you like me to contact her for you?"

Riri sat for a moment, considering her options and her own feelings.

"No, that's alright Griot. We're going to my lab. Can you help me boot up VIV when we get there? We're going on a trip."

"As you wish, Miss Riri."

Riri stood up, grabbing a hoodie and sliding on some J's. Before she walked out the door, she slid on the kimoyo beads and asked a final question.

"Oh, one last thing Griot. Can you turn on privacy mode? I would like my location hidden from everyone, including the Panther. Can you do that?"

"It seems I can, but I would not advise that action Miss Riri. There are safety protocols in place that the Panther can activate for you remotely."

"That's fine, just turn it on. I have my own safety protocols."

"As you wish, Miss Riri."

"Thank you, Griot."

Riri made her way to her garage in no time, paying no mind to the world around her or the messages on her phone from MJ about their project. When she got there, she did decide to shoot her a quick text explaining that she was heading home to Chicago for a family emergency, that MJ could find her portion already done on a small drive in her room and that she had permission to break in, and that she would make it up to her later. MJ did reply, but Riri didn’t have time for that. She got to work, with the help of Griot, or the portion of him that she was allowed to operate, and booted up her own AI and implemented it into her nano suit. The one from wakanda was on its way but wouldn’t be there in time. Thankfully, she didn’t have to meet with Namor for another day and a half. She needed to think quickly but after working everything out with her suit, she was unsure where to go from there.

“Griot, can I use both you and VIV?”

“Yes, but you likely will not need me once the AI is turned on. I will be there when you need me, though Miss Riri.”

“Thank you Griot.” Riri smiled to herself, always fond of Griot and their robot voice. It made her think about the time she spent in the lab with Shuri, where they would borderline argue and Riri would laugh at them. This brought back that pang in her stomach and chest. She got to work on turning on and engaging with the AI so that it could mold to her needs, voice and patterns. After about an hour, she felt ready to head off. Except she had no idea how to get to Wakanda, let alone how to get in. She ruffled through her bookbag to find the information Namor had sent for her. A small teal envelope with her name on it, looking like it was written with a quill and ink. She shuddered at the thought of how old this man was and how intentional he had been to get this note to her. She opened it and read over it again, hoping to find more information than last time. Then, an idea came to mind.

“Hey VIV, and Griot, not that I don’t think you can handle it by yourself VIV. But uh, can you both scan this for me? I don’t have my Black light. Look for anything and everything. Cross reference what you find, if anything. Please.”

“Yes IronHeart.” “Yes, Miss Riri.” They both answered in tandem. While they got to work, Riri sat down finally to think about what she could do. She couldn’t exactly call up the avengers to help her figure this out. She had to be lowkey, she had to be smart, and she needed it to work. She had only been to Wakanda once, and wasn’t really in the know about how to travel there let alone get through the border forcefield. As she went over all she did know, trying to remember any details that would help, the AI duo alerted her.

Griot speaking first, since VIV seemed to sense a deeper trust from the IronHeart’s patterns.

“There are markings on the back that would indicate a geolocation where Namor would like you to meet.”

“So, coordinates? I can work with that.” Riri said out loud, still trying to figure out exactly how she could work with that. Until she looked over at her father’s red car, in pristine condition thanks to Shuri. And it dawned on her.

“Griot, do you have contact information for anybody besides Shuri?”

“I have contact information for Queen Shuri, and Okoye, former general of the Dora Milage.”

“Perfect. Please contact her now.”

“Yes, Miss Riri.”

“Wait, before you do, please transfer this contact information over to VIV. I’m not sure if Shuri knows that I have VIV yet, but in case she does, I don’t doubt that she would shut you down.” Riri explains to her favorite robot as if they needed it. Griot complied and sent a call out to Okoye.

Riri waited, holding her breath. She wasn’t sure is Okoye would answer, or even be willing to help. But this is what she had to work with.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, Okoye answered.

“Small girl. Is everything alright?” Okoye answered seeming cheerful enough to hear from the girl but not without worry for the cause. Riri took a deep breath and explained the situation, truthfully, to the best of her ability. Somehow, as a surprise to both of them, Okoye was on her way in a matter of minutes as a Midnight Angel, with a jet that Shuri had let her keep. They both knew Shuri would be upset, but somehow it didn’t matter enough to let her get to Namor. They both knew what could happen, and what Shuri would likely do.

No time was wasted when Okoye arrived, Riri running in the open hatch as fast as she could. Okoye pulled off without a trace, both of them hoping they hadn’t alerted any American law enforcement this time.

Okoye charted course for Wakanda and they both sat in near silence for most of the ride, only sharing a few words when Riri boarded, Riri showing Okoye the letter before she began piloting. They would make it in time. Riri sat near the back, not feeling like she belonged at the mantle of the machine. She had always liked these, having begged Shuri to teach her how to fly one before they set off for war. Riri sunk into her feelings that she had been trying to keep at bay since finding out about the AI. Before Shuri came, she honestly really wasn’t sure what she was going to do or how she was going to do it. But it seemed like the timing would suggest that she was supposed to, whether she really wanted to believe that or not. She didn’t want to believe that she was this horrible monster who brought death and destruction with her everywhere she went, but sometimes she really did. She tried to fight those thoughts back and began to feel the weight of her body, sinking into the seat. Sinking was a familiar feeling to her. She tried to remember how to swim in her own thoughts. She remembered how Shuri would talk her through her episodes. How she would call right away when she sensed anything off, even if Riri wasn’t wearing her beads. She remembered how it felt to think everything would be okay, and how often that was proved to be untrue.

It was too easy to remember. Too easy to feel like it was just yesterday. Riri couldn't keep her mind from wandering back in time while the Wakandan jet made its way through the air. Trying to focus on anything else, trying to pay attention to the Dora silently flying or guarding the exit, trying to watch the sky around her. Anything. She couldn't bite down hard enough on the inside of her cheek, leaving a sore mark wasn't enough to keep her mind from its current occupation.

"What are you doing here?!" The shorter of the two screamed, almost screeched as she ran into the panther's arms.

"I had some time to myself finally. Where else would I go?" Shuri chuckled as she picked the scientist up.

"You could literally go anywhere in the world and probably... out of the world? At this point with Wakandan tech." Riri explained, seriously, as she hung onto the slim but toned body holding her off the ground with ease, not realizing she was holding on as tight as she was. Not realizing there was nowhere else Shuri would have gone. Nowhere.

"You're so... anyway, what should we do?"

"How long do we have?" Riri asked as she pulled back, not even trying to contain her wide grin that was plastered across her face. Shuri recorded it to memory, as she always did with the smaller woman's features.

"96 hours. Well, 96-ish, less now that we've been standing here debating where I could've gone." Shuri jokes as she lets go, making sure Riri found her footing.

"Shut up! Four days?! We have so much to do!" Riri definitely screeched this time, pretending to slap Shuri's arm. Fighting the urge to grab it and pull her in, Shuri picks up Riri's book bag from where she dropped it and places it in her desk chair as she walks to the bed and pulls her own bag out from under the bed.

"Exactly how long have you been here? You seem comfortable." Riri jokes as she grabs two waters from her mini fridge and hops up on her bed.

"I am." Shuri chuckles at the sight of the shorter woman having to jump to get on the bed. "And since your first class."

"Are you serious?! Why didn't you say anything dickhead?!"

"Ouch!" Shuri feigns pain as she catches the pillow Riri throws at her head and plops on the bed next to her. "I had a few things to handle, and needed to secure the dorm building. I didn't want to disrupt your day, I know midterms are coming up no?"

"Yeah, they are but you could've let a bitch know! I would've cleaned!" Riri states, noticing that she sounds much like her mother.

"I like your mess." Shuri smiles.

"Shut up. How did you secure the whole dorm building?"

"Well, I hope you don't mind. I have beads in every corner of the building. And a few around campus as well. Including in here. Is that alright with you?"

"Sheesh. Do I have a choice?" Riri jokes, but Shuri nervously answers.

"Yes of course! If it's not comfortable for you, I can sleep at a hotel. I should've asked, I'm sorry about that. Next time I'll-"

"There's a next time too?"

"Well, if you'd li-"

"Are you crazy?! Of course! And yeah yeah, that's all fine with me. I get it. Don't start worrying about it or nun. I was just curious."

Shuri's smile returns and she relaxes back into the bed. It was oddly comfortable, being that the last time she was here was before the war. Sure, they'd been talking for months over facetimes and calls. And texts. And letters.. oddly, but not to them. They were both truly as desperate as they felt, but excused it since it seemed mutual - opting to call it a mutual interest in friendship, as opposed to what it really was in the bigger picture. And sure, they had seen each other one other time, but it was so brief that it shouldn't really count - although it did, to both of them.

Shuri had arrived at an American event in Boston, forced to show face by the elders after the uproar surrounding her mother and everything. She felt it was too soon and didn't make sense to attend a tech gala when none of it was even touching Wakandan tech. But regardless, she put on her best suit and went, disregarding the elder's request for her to wear traditional royal attire. She sat there, wishing she hadn't come, while big investors droned on. The only part that peaked her interest was listening to the stories of young inventors. They reminded her of herself, so excited and in a hurry. They reminded her of someone else too. Someone she had been longing to see since she left Wakanda only a few months ago at the time.

Shuri muddled around the thought of calling Riri, or just showing up at her dorm. She knew she had responsibilities to attend to the next afternoon after she returned home, and it really hadn't been that long. Maybe Riri wasn't ready to see her yet? Or maybe she never would be. Or maybe Shuri had really made their connection up in her own mind. Or maybe she didn't? And maybe she should just call her, or maybe send her a quick text to keep it more casual? Keep what, casual exactly? She wasn't sure. She paced around her own mind anxiously the entire night, not realizing it was her turn to speak until the Doras were next to her asking if she was alright. She collected herself and headed to the stage, performing a speech much like her brother had about the importance of innovation, supporting the youth - especially the Black and Brown youth, etc. She meant what she said but she hardly felt as connected or present with it as she was when she wrote it. Still circling her mind was her favorite innovator, the scientist who made everything make sense to her. Pining so badly, by the end of her speech she had resolved to call Riri. Faking her smiles through the eruption of clapping and handshakes as she left the stage, she made her way back to her seat while the closing speech began - only to lose her resolve when Ayo bent down to whisper a reminder of their exit plan and their intended arrival time back in Wakanda.

She had known it was a foolish thought. Who even knew what the small scientist would be doing at this time? She could be working, studying, partying. God, Shuri hoped not but recoiled at her own thoughts. She wasn't heteronormative and she wasn't the toxic type. She just also felt jealous of anybody and anything that got to be around Riri when she wasn't. Which was most times. Essentially all the time. Really, she reasoned with herself, she had only been around Riri for a few days and it had been against her will anyway. Maybe she really was making all of this up in her head.

The Queen of Wakanda continued her mental pace as she made her exit, later than most guests and certainly not from the front entrance. She walked through the beautiful building with the Doras who were talking amongst themselves about logistics, seemingly all having caught onto another one of Shuri's "moods". Shuri paid them no mind, as they expected, while she began brooding. What was the point of coming to America, aside from like... the actual point, politically - if not to see her scientist? She caught herself scoffing at "her scientist", making fun of herself in her head as they headed outside and around the back when the Doras suddenly stood alert around her. Shuri looked around her and back at her beads quickly, doing a quick scan of their surroundings, only to hear a small, out of breath "Hey" from her left.

"Williams?"

"Yeah, yeah.. haha. Hoo. Crazy catching you here." Riri joked awkwardly as she tried to catch her breath from clearing having run.

"Yes, well I was-"

"Giving a speech. I saw on tv. Just happened to be in the neighborhood myself so I figured I'd uh, say hi." Riri cut the Panther off as she caught her bearings and finally made eye contact. Shuri made contact back, silently signaling for the Dora to drop their guard. Ayo looked between them but of course followed command. Shuri stepped between them and closer to the scientist, who was now twiddling her fingers and looking anywhere but at Shuri. Just like she did in Wakanda. Just like Shuri had replayed in her head a billion times over. While Shuri took the absence of eye contact as a chance to damn near gawk at the smaller woman, Riri was doing her own mental laps.

She also questioned her intentions and if she had been making this all up. She also questioned how crazy she must look, showing up here like this. She couldn't stop herself, leaving MJ, Peter and Ned in her OWN room after they had been flipping through channels and Riri caught a glimpse. That was all it took, one, maybe two seconds and she was out the door. And granted, she kind of was in the neighborhood. If you consider being four miles away in the neighborhood. She had considered grabbing her car from the garage but figured it would take too long, so she jumped in her nano suit her and Peter had been working on (that definitely still needed some work), and flew over. Of course she couldn't land in front of everyone, so she landed in a park a few blocks away and took off on foot. None of which she will EVER tell anybody, although she could barely remember her excuse to the three friends she left in her dorm as she forced herself to look back up and meet Shuri's eyes.

"In the neighborhood?"

"You could say that." Riri joked awkwardly again.

This made Shuri laugh. Riri had that effect on her, she had learned during their late night lab sessions. Even in the midst of the grimmest of days and a literal war, Riri had Shuri laughing so hard she cried a few times. They both seemed to be thinking back while they laughed together and smiled at each other shyly until Ayo cleared her throat.

"We must get going, Kumkanikazi." Both women seemed to jump a bit, having been pulled out of their staring contest. Riri shuddered at hearing Shuri be called that, she recognized it from when Okoye would speak about Queen Ramonda. She had done her best to pick up on as much of the language as she could when she was there, for some reason unknown to her - she just figured it would come in handy. But now, hearing it and knowing it meant Queen, shook her to her core. She remembered why she hadn't reached out, the guilt that sat in her bones about it. She nearly turned on her heels until she heard Shuri speak.

"One moment please."

"My Queen, we really must-" Ayo begun speaking in Xhosa but was cut off by the Panther Queen.

"Please. One moment." Shuri said, a command but almost begging, not turning to face the general one step to the side of her. She pulled at the necklace around her neck and Ayo nodded silently.

"I will ready the jet." Ayo answered and turned around, her and the two other Dora briskly walking to the jet that was just now coming into Riri's focus. She assumed it was using the new camouflage tech she had heard mentioned before she left Wakanda.

"Those things get cooler every time."

"Yeah, I suppose they do." Shuri laughed half heartedly. They both tried to speak but cut each other off.

"So-"

"I do-"

"You first." They both sheepishly smiled as they spoke in unison. but Riri insisted. "Go ahead, please."

Shuri would've resisted if she wasn't so desperate and struggling against showing it.

"How have you been? I've mis- I've been wondering. We haven't spoken since you left." Shuri caught herself, suddenly feeling like twiddling her fingers and looking at her shoes too but she resisted that too. She was good at resisting.

"Oh.. well yeah. I've been. You know, school, work. Just been trying to get through the semester. I wanted to re- well I wondered how you've been too."

"I've been, too." Shuri shrugged with a smile. She wanted to know more, everything. To devour the stories Riri could tell her, even the most mundane. She wanted to know what pencils she used to write equations and what she thought of the food in her cafeteria. Riri just smiled, feeling the weight again. She knew Shuri hadn't been good, and she knew she hadn't either.

"Can I ask you-" They both spoke in unison again.

"You first." Riri insisted again, before Shuri could. Shuri didn't like it but she also didn't have much time to waste.

"Why didn't you reach out?" She asked, leaving Riri out of breath all over again. After a second that seemed like a million, Riri answered.

"I didn't know how." She said truthfully.

"I left you beads. Maybe I should've left a note too. I'm sorry, I figured you'd-"

"No, no. Not like that. I figured that out, it was actually pretty easy." Riri smiled, thinking about how much fun it was to try to get the beads to work. Fun until it wasn't. Fun until she heard Shuri's voice message and left it for months.

"Then you didn't want to?"

"No, I did. I just didn't know... how. I didn't know what to say, or how to say it. But trust me, I wanted to. I really wanted to." Riri said earnestly and more quiet than she intended. Shuri believed her and took her answer, even if she didn't like it. Again resisting herself. Resisting Riri.

"I understand. Thank you for letting me know. Well..." She looked back at the Jet and sighed. They made eye contact before Shuri decided it would be best to count her losses in her own country, turning to leave.

"Wait, I still have a question!" Riri almost shouted. "If that's okay... of course." She said more quiet. Shuri turned around eager to hear. Hoping. Resisting. But hoping. She nodded her head.

"Well..." Riri twisted her fingers around in her hands. She still didn't know what to say or how to say it. But she didn't have much time to waste.

"Well?" Shuri asked, trying not to sound pushy but anxious to know.

"Is it too late?" Riri asked, looking back up at the woman in front of her. The face she had committed to memory, but a bit different. More mature. Somehow even more beautiful. Shuri said nothing.

"...To reach out... To talk?" Riri finally drove it home, sending a silent prayer to whoever would answer that she wouldn't further embarrass herself.

Startling the both of them, Shuri's beads lit up and Ayo's face appeared.

"My apologies my Queen, but if we do not leave in the next three minutes, you may be late to your engagements tomorrow."

"Yes, thank you. I'm coming." Shuri said back, eyes still on Riri.

Riri felt defeated as she watched the panther tuck her beads back up her sleeve. It probably was too late. And who knows. Maybe it was the right thing to do to not stay in contact. Maybe that's what was best for Wakanda or Shuri. She remembered her mother always telling her that sometimes "doing the right thing feels like shit". In this case, she thought, it felt worse than shitty.

That was until Shuri grabbed her hand. Softly, almost too soft in comparison to what you'd expect from a super powered panther. It was so soft yet sent a shiver through Riri, like electricity was coursing through her. Like her heart was beating for the first time. The eye contact was somehow not as awkward as it was a second ago when they were standing a few feet apart. It was like they were all alone.

"Use the beads. If they need to charge, just set them in the sun but they shouldn't."

"Oh- Okay. I will. I will." Riri said twice, almost like she was confirming with herself first and the Shuri.

"Good." Shuri smiled. She took a step closer before she heard another beep on her own beads. Before the General could speak, Shuri was already responding.

"I heard you. I'm coming."

She looked at Riri again and sighed, and suddenly Riri saw just how exhausted the Panther really was. And maybe something else too. Shuri stepped back again, not wanting to let go of Riri's hand.

"It'll never be too late. I'll see you soon?" Shuri said, finally letting go and letting the physical distance regrow between them, hoping that the emotional distance wouldn't grow again too.

Riri watched as the panther walked back to the jet and boarded, looking back only once, only long enough to catch Riri's small wave but not return it. The younger scientist stood there feeling disassociated, unsure of what to do next. Really, she knew she had to go back to her dorm and go back to living her real life just like she had after she left Wakanda. Although, as dreary as that still seemed to her, this time felt different. Like there was something to look forward to, if she had the balls to actually use the beads like Shuri had said. She mulled over whether or not it was an instruction or a question from the Panther as she chose not to watch the jet fly off behind her. She heard the media start to buzz again when they heard the jet, upset that they had missed the person they were waiting for. Yet, Riri stood there and stared at the ground where Shuri was just standing. She still felt that pathetic feeling, and worried that she hadn't had a chance to explain how she found Shuri or even knew she would be there. She felt the weight of grief again, after seeing how tired Shuri looked when you really looked at her. And she felt guilty, for feeling excited. For feeling the butterflies she always pretended she didn't feel. She wondered, briefly, how Shuri was feeling right now but per usual, tried not to wonder too much as to not become delusional. She knew better than anybody that assuming to know how someone else thinks is the worst mistake you can make.

Shuri, back in the jet that was flying faster than she would like, was afflicted by similar thoughts. She wondered how Riri had found her and wondered if she really was as lucky as that just felt. She wondered why the girl even came. She wondered if she thinks about her too. She wondered if Riri would use the beads. She sat awake, replaying every moment of their time together since their first encounter over and over until they arrived in Wakanda, despite the Doras concerns for her not getting rest. Shuri would rest when things were well enough for her to rest, she told herself, but even she was starting to notice the cracks. She knew she could only stay awake for so many days until her body would shut down. She had secretly tried some of the elixirs and teas that both Nakia and Aneka had sent her, and she had read what Okoye sent her after hearing everything. She had slept every now and then, but it was never restful. It was never without torment from some figment of her mind taking shape of someone she wasn't ready to face - whether that be Namor, N'jdaka, or her mother. She always prayed for T'Challa to appear, who she wasn't sure if she was ready to see but longed for the comfort of his voice or face, but each time her body fell asleep, her mind fell into a well pit of despair.

That is, until later that night. Shuri had been through her daily responsibilities after making it back to Wakanda. Once her meetings were over, she made her way to the lab. She did her best to avoid checking the status of Riri's beads, trying to keep her mind busy as she usually did. It was harder this time, knowing that she'd actually spoken to the girl. After bopping around a bit, her body started to feel the weight of the past few days. She hadn't been physically training as much as she should've the past few weeks, because she knew it would knock her out but she was starting to feel stiff. She finally let up and sat down at one of her desks in a back room of the lab after Griot had let her know her vitals. She didn't usually sit in this room, so she hadn't been aware of what was placed in there. As she lazily sifted through the papers on the desk to try to keep her mind occupied, she saw blueprints for Riri's Iron Heart suit. The same feeling of nervousness and excitement rose in her as she more hurriedly looked over them. Despite all the work they did together, she never really got to see too much of Riri's initial process from scratch. She ran her slender fingers over Riri's pencil marks, reading over all her notes to herself.

With a yawn, Shuri sat back and relished in the fact that Riri actually existed. Sometimes, when Shuri was really out of it, she couldn't believe that everything really happened. She was sometimes convinced she would wake up and her mother would still be here, or that Riri was just a figment of her desperate imagination. Sure, having her mother back would be... well, everything. But it scared Shuri to think Riri might not have been real, that she didn't really happen. She felt selfish for this, knowing that Riri's life would probably be better without the trauma she endured in Wakanda. But nevertheless, Shuri held on tight to the memories she had of the woman, hoping that they would be enough for her.

She thought about how it felt to hold Riri's hand, to touch her skin again. It was just as soft and delicate as it had been when they parted ways a few months ago. Her face looked the same, maybe more mature in some ways. She looked tired too, underneath the face she put on for other people. They had gotten past that with each other during their long nights alone working together in the lab.

She thought about what it would feel like to fall asleep in Riri's bed. The mattress probably wasn't super comfortable but she remembers all the colorful pillows she has, messily strewn across the surface. The different colored blankets would probably fit them both well, even with the little space a twin bed supplies. They would have to be close, touching. Shuri imagined breathing in sync, feeling Riri's ribcage rise and fall in her arms while they were pressed against each other. She thought about how Riri smells. She's been trying to replicate it for months. She thought about breathing her in, laying her face in the crook of her neck and sleeping. Not thinking. Sleeping. Not even having to dream. She thought about waking up next to her, seeing her sleeping still until Shuri shifted too much by accident. Riri waking up and no doubt saying something funny. Or soft. Or just saying hello. How her eyes would look. She thought about not being afraid to make it real, that in her thoughts she didn't have to pretend that these touches were by accident or out of necessity. That they could spend an eternity, wrapped in colorful blankets, sleeping and touching skin to skin. That maybe Riri would feel the same, and they would laugh about how long it took to figure it out. That they would laugh until they couldn't, and talk until they couldn't, and then they would kiss. And everything would melt away, and neither would know where their skin would begin or end. And they would kiss until they couldn't. And they'd sleep.

She hadn't realized she had fallen asleep at the desk until she heard Griot's voice.

"Sorry to startle you, Panther. But, Miss Williams is trying to contact you. How would you like me to proceed?"

Shuri was shook, unsure of what she looked like or even what time it was. She felt nervous. She felt groggy, not even sure if this was real either. Nevertheless, she answered.

"Patch me through, please."

She waited a moment with bated breath, hoping this wasn't a dream or some fluke. Until she heard a familiar voice.

"Hello?" Riri asked, sounding nervous herself. Shuri wondered what time it was there, too.

"Hey." She said, in a more relaxed tone. Even if this wasn't real, it was still the best dream she'd had in months. Maybe ever.

And they talked, for a long time. Eventually working through any awkwardness. Riri never explained how she made it to the Panther, and the Panther never asked. She did explain, however, why it took so long for her to call. Shuri just listened and let herself laugh, like she'd been dreaming about. Finally feeling free for a little bit, even if it was just for a little bit.

On the other side of things, once Riri had cleared everyone out of her room when she got back and promising to explain to MJ later, she had sat down and thought about what to do. That turned into pacing and talking outloud. She had been avoiding the beads like the plague for months, unsure of what to do. Unsure of what choice would cause the least harm, since she already felt guilty for what she had caused. She found herself awake all night feeling anxious. She left for class that morning, deciding that she would get through her day and take a nap. She would figure it out after that. What she didn't tell Shuri, is how hard its been to sleep since she left Wakanda, or really even how hard it was while she was there. But when she tried to take a nap, she realized that all she dreamed about this time was Shuri and how soft her hand was when they had touched and how peaceful it felt to talk to her, even if only for a few moments and only a few words. She decided when she woke up that even if they ended up never talking again, she would keep her promise and use the beads.

And that's what she did. And that's what they kept doing, for weeks and months. They talked, they listened, they laughed, and on rare occasion, fell asleep. Both free from nightmares, even if just for a little while. Until Shuri finally arrived.

And finally, they had some time to really figure things out. Shuri promised she wasn't missing anything important by being there, and that she had allotted enough time. Riri was still unsure about it but couldn't resist the opportunity to finally see the woman she had been pining over for months - as a friend, of course.

As Riri remembered back fondly, she had forgotten what was ahead of her until she was jolted by turbulence that was usually well controlled by the Wakandan tech in the fighter jet. She couldn't process how she could possibly be on her way to confront the man that almost killed her and did actually kill the Queen of Wakanda. She couldn't fathom that she was racing there, against her love, her best friend, to make sure she didn't kill him first. Suddenly her clothes all felt too tight, and her suit felt heavy despite being nano. Suddenly the air felt hot and her lungs felt empty and she felt dizzy. She had felt all of this before, a panic attack. Riri Williams was no stranger to a panic attack. Not before Wakanda, and definitely not after. Though, for the past few months, she had always had Shuri to help ground her. Now, she was floating in the air, literally and figuratively. Everything was moving so fast. She felt herself spiraling and cursing herself in the process, unable to stop it but ashamed nonetheless. She had worked hard, since she was younger, to have a control over her emotions and thoughts. She needed to, especially if she was going to take this super hero shit serious. Especially if she was going to be there for her mom and sister after her dad passed. Especially if she was going to make it. But she felt that control slowly ripping itself to shreds, doing a number on all the mental blocks she had in place. She couldn't lose Shuri. She couldn't be the cause of another war in Wakanda. She couldn't live with the guilt. She couldn't let Shuri get hurt, or worse, for her again. Even if it meant confronting a man much more powerful than her. Even if it meant losing. Even if it meant drowning all over again.

Suddenly, she felt a cool hand grace the side of her cheek. She felt her suit dematerialize around her until it was just a bracelet again. She felt Okoye kneel down in front of her, eyes kinder than they usually were. She felt her pull her in close and squeeze. The pressure of the embrace bringing Riri back into her body. They stayed like that until Riri could breathe again.

She went to apologize as Okoye pulled back silently, just as she had appeared, but she was cut off.

"Aht aht. There is no need." Okoye softly but firmly let her know, sitting down next to her. They had never been this close before. Riri looked over to see the jet flying itself. The first time she saw that happen she was crazy nervous, but she's grown to trust both Wakandan tech and Okoye. After a few moments of silence, Okoye spoke again.

"I know what she means to you, you know."

Riri looked at her finally, noticing how somber her eyes really looked. She had seen those eyes before, but not like this. Okoye continued, looking back out the windows.

"I was T'Challa's right hand. I saw it all, from the beginning to the end. I saw him be the panther, I saw him be the king. I saw him be Shuri's brother." Riri felt a pang in her at the use of Shuri's name. She listened.

"And I saw him fall in love. I saw him devote himself to Nakia, and I saw her unravel at the loss of him - until she left. I saw it all, as much as I could. And I often wondered why I didn't feel the way they seemed to feel when my husband betrayed me and Wakanda. But their love... it was pure. It was something out of this world, it was something built into them." Okoye sighed, feeling grief in many directions. Riri found herself fighting back tears again until Okoye looked at her with different eyes, almost loving eyes this time.

"I have seen that kind of love before and that is how I know you have it. Both of you. And that is how I know we will figure this out." Okoye looked at her and squeezed her hand again, affirming what she said. They both heard the AI tell them they were approaching in the next 5 minutes. Through her tears that were now shamelessly falling down her face, Riri gulped out a question, in true Riri fashion.

"Do you think you will ever love like that?"

"I already do." Okoye said, getting up and adjusting herself to get back to the front of the plane to chart their secret entrance into Wakanda. Riri looked confused.

"Ngudade wethu." Okoye answered again, before sitting down and being who she needed to be. Riri knew what she said, and knew that she was right. About all of it.

As they prepared themselves, Riri suited up and made her way to the front of the plane.

"Where did he say to meet?" The midnight angel asked Riri. She sent the coordinates to the jet and looked at them wistfully. She hadn't really thought about where she might actually be going to "talk" to him when she was rushing to get herself to Wakanda. She jumped when Okoye gasped.

"What?! What is it?!" Worry filled her from head to toe again, hoping it had nothing to do with Shuri.

"That bastard... We are going to have to find a way to break into the palace. He wants to meet in the throne room."

Riri was speechless, knowing that this was a tactic to try to make her feel weak. She also couldn't deny that it was working. She felt her heart rate increase at the thought of being back in there. Of seeing the place where she almost died. Of... all of it. She had visited many times in her dreams, all against her will. And now she would face him there, against her will. She knew he was doing this to weaken her resolve, much like her and Shuri did with the dehydrating jet. She knew his intent all along, but this certainly solidified it.

Riri tried to make peace with dying in Wakanda. Once again, her mom wouldn't know where she was or how any of this happened. She wondered what lie they would tell her. She wondered if she would fight or just give herself to him. She wondered what Shuri would do, knowing this wouldn't end well no matter what she did. But she held her mind together as best as she could. She knew she had to meet him before she did. She knew she had to do what she could to prevent a second war. Okoye knew too, looking at her and then pulling up her own beads to try and locate Shuri.

"The Panther's location services are currently offline." The Ai spoke to them.

"Let us pray she is behind us and not ahead of us."

"Will she know where to find us?"

"We are about to break into the most secure place on the planet earth. I'm sure everyone will know where to find us in a matter of moments." Okoye answered and they shared a look.

"I hope you know, I will fight until the end with you. I have stood with the Wakandan throne my whole life. I have stood with Shuri and those that came before her. I have stood for the safety of my people as best as possible, but I have made my own mistakes before. I will stand with you, now, Riri. No matter the outcome."

Riri felt the pull of her tear ducts again but different this time. Okoye reminded her of her own sister, and of her own mistakes. She reached out a hand and found Okoye's. They held hands until it was time to land.

Once they had maneuvered their way into the country using Okoye's knowledge as former general and her new disguising tech, which Riri made a note to recreate if she made it out of this, Riri followed Okoye into the dense jungle around them.

"The best chance we have is to stay low until we can't anymore, and then charge in. The Doras won't see it coming but they will react, with their full might as they've been trained to do. Even to me. Our goal is not to harm any Wakandans, but we have to get to the throne room before he does. I will do my best to reason with Ayo and Aneka but they will resist a meeting with him there. Once we spot him, we must draw him away from the palace. Even if it means drawing him to the sea. Remember that he is most powerful near water."

Riri nods as she listens. Okoye wishes there were another way.

"Remember that if we see Shuri, we may already be too late. We must keep them separate. I do not know if she will choose peace a second time. Not when it concerns you."

"I don't want her to do this, I hope you know. You were right. You were right about it all. I love her. But I don't want her to risk everything for me. You all already have and I can't live with that. I can't live with any of this. I don't want to die but... But I can't let everyone else die for me either." Riri spits out, hoping she's being believed. She means it. Okoye looks at her and hears Nakia's voice in her head. "I just know his spirit. It is simple in that way for me."

"Ndiyawazi umoya wakho. I believe you. And I will fight to make sure no one has to die today, unfortunately even him if it means peace."

"Thank you."

"Thank you, small girl."

"For what?" Riri asked, genuinely surprised since most of the mayhem the past few months has been a result of her actions - intentional or not.

"For giving her something to hold onto again. Something to believe in." Okoye answered truthfully. Riri didn't know what to say but she took in what the older woman said, against trusting her. After a few moments of silence, it was time.

"Stand behind me and do not fly until I tell you. If you enter the air space anywhere near the palace, you will be shot down before you can count to one. Do you understand?" Riri nodded.

She did understand. Now, more clearly than ever.

🖤

#black sapphic #riri williams #Shuri Udaku #iron heart #black panther #black panther wakanda forever #black wlw #marvel #SHURIRI #SCIENCE GAYS #SORRY FOR THE ANGST BUT I HAD TO

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the-witchs-cafe · 2 months

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Directory | BYF | Witch Essays

Hello, hello! And welcome to the Witch's Cafe! Have you gotten weary? The crushing loneliness of your own self-torment became way too much? Fret not- this establishment is here for all witches; those who have fallen from the greatest of heights, to those who have been left with nothing at all.

Here in this little coffee bar settling between the cosmos, our customers have traveled far and wide just to socialize and find solace within their shared agonies- some managing to cross through universes; so be on the lookout for those whose faces you might have the luck to recognize!

We also herald our existence with this flag- oh, don't you worry! This flag is free for anyone to use, even if all our operations were to cease!

With all that being said, I'm certain you would like to know the way through these halls;

#Witching Hours: The customer list! Go right ahead and greet yourself to these fine folks! Maybe you'll find more similarities between yourselves than you would intially assume. (Gen. tag for crossover witches made by other people)

#Registered Witches: What cafe would this be if we didn't have any regulars? Recognized their choices of beverages just like the back of my hands! If you wish for a story, they're your go-to's! (Witch essays written by either mod H.N Elly or mod Charlotte)

#Witch cards: Every now and then, familiar faces start popping up more than usual; not as much as our regulars, but it is fun to observe their activities, even if from a distance. (same as the above, but in the form of much smaller witch cards)

#Would Witch Out: Passerby's and their rumors...honestly, you couldn't blame a gal for eavesdropping every now and then, no? Not even while getting the latest scoop on who was the poor soul whose destiny caught up with them? (due to the shutdown of YFWWO and in order to give its mod a break, I've opened up operations here. Submissions are now closed! HOWEVER, the ask box is still open for those who would like to share their opinions on certain witch-related matters. We also encourage adding a reason behind their inevitable demise. The list of pending requests can be found here.)

#Would Survive PMMM: Of course, some folks do happen to be naturally lucky; finding a way and reason to keep going forwards even in the darkest of nights...it's admirable, maybe a little enviable, don't ya think? (The complete opposite of the above; if you know a character who would cakewalk through this universe's trials and tribulations, let us know with the full details regarding why!)

#There Is a Pipe Bomb in your Mailbox: Those lil' misfits out there and what tricks they got on their sleeves- ah, what fun would it be if I didn't allow any tomfoolery every now and then? (The joke submissions tag)

#There is no Secret Menu!: (The shitpost tag; hey, the great Italian poet, Dante Alighieri, had called his little self-insert fanfic in which he and Virgil went through all sects of the afterlife "The Divine Comedy" for a reason, right? We all need a reason to crack up since we're gonna be in our self-inflicted torment and punishments for some time.)

#You're now listening to . . .: Solace can be nice every once in a while, but a nice tune to distract yourself from the pain and get in the mood to continue working on your eternal goals is just as comforting! (general audio tag)

I do also have to warn ya'll that we also have to abide by the blacklist; yeah, we do try to cater to all that enter these doors, but an eldritch horror needs to have some standards, ya know?

Hetalia

Country Humans/Country Balls

Any of the media created by Okegom/DeepSeaPrisoner

Minecraft SMPs, especially Dream SMP

Building upon the above, we do not take requests for real world figures, unless if they were obvious jokes. This includes, and is not limited to, youtubers, musicians, pop idols, and individual game developers.

The Mandela Catalog

Harry Potter

#The-Witchs-Cafe #puella magi madoka magica

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wiitchkins · 2 years

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Hello!!! okay obviously your knowledge of and taste in fashion is INCREDIBLE, we ALL know this, it is ELITE AND SUPERIOR - my question is, what's your background in fashion? what influences do you consider very important in your art? you mentioned in your most recent drawing of marinette that guo pei's couture is some you really like, so you clearly Know Some Stuff about fashion!! p.s. your art is *waves hands around* i would let it eat me

Ahhhhhh!! Thank you thank you thank you this means so much to me to hear! As for my background in fashion…

I am sorry to say I actually have basically 0 actual background in fashion aside from watching almost every season of project runway as it was airing (dropped off a few seasons after Tim and Heidi left) and a long standing appreciation of fashion as an art form.

I’ve never been particularly fashion forward or stylistically adept and I would say pretty much up until I started college I was pretty. Unstylish. Anti-stylish? In my own wardrobe. Nowadays I actually mostly present in way that leans more butch and I do have a defined style I’m both comfortable in and actively enjoy, but it’s very very different from what I like to draw and design.

As the internet evolved it became a lot easier to find stuff and for the past mmm five or so years I try to keep up with the seasonal runways, a lot of which you can find literal photos and recordings of on Vogue.com. Couture is… deeply fundamentally different from “ready to wear” in that it’s often simply unwearable in everyday life, but I think the way it emphasizes certain shapes, forms, and movement is, simply put, absolutely fucking sick (it is however not without its problems as in my experience mmm some Couture fashion folks can be extremely pretentious and intolerable 🙄 not to mention the space itself is highly inaccessible, favors certain features/body types/skin tones, and is inherently classcist, etc etc)

To keep up with what’s currently “fashionable” (as in what people are actually wearing) I honestly just scroll through Instagram to see who’s wearing what and going through different tags and knowing keywords for what different groups elf describe as helps. “#streetwear” is gonna give you a different feed than “#it girl” is gonna give you a different feed than “#office fit”. I also like to scroll through instas and tumblrs that are literally just interviews and photos with random people op finds out in the world- you see personality in how things are put together in specific. What makes a look personal to them? What is practicality and what is fashion, and how much of each does each individual desire? I don’t think everyone is the same kind of Fashion Forward (or even is fashion forward) and I think it’s fun to find different niches and mix and match while still applying design theory Ive learned elsewhere. Even a character who is specifically Not Fashionable is that way in a specific sense, and could still have an appealing design. Also studying fashion at all gave me the ability to draw fabric which is a huge skill.

Without saying too much about my actual job, I am not a character designer at the moment, but I do think having this general knowledge of costume design and vested interest in keeping up current fashion (both ready to wear and couture/runway) is extremely important in my profession and wish it was more emphasized as I think it would be. Very helpful. The character design in Apple TV’s/Skydance’s Luck drives me absolutely bonkers because it sucks so much and the main characters looks like an old navy ad circa 2010. The same could unfortunately be said for our fav girl Marinette. She’s allowed to be less aggressively Fashionable because she is in fact a child, but I’d love to see a bit more attention to detail and understanding of what teens wear nowadays, let alone what they were wearing even 5 years ago. Her look was a tiny bit dated when the show was first released, but it’s even more egregious now. Not that they’re going to change it anytime soon but they had an opportunity in the movie to at least play with proportions since the jacket’s.. cut I guess and pink capri jeans are the most egregious. Maybe I’ll do a redesign that keeps the general idea/pieces in tact… idk. God. Please character designers learn fashion.

Anyway now that I’ve written an essay here’s some stuff I’ve liked and have been thinking about recently:

Guo Pei (as I said, Spring 2019 rules, but Spring 2017, 2018 and Fall 2019 are my favs)

Zimmerman Fall/Winter 2022

Heaven Gaia Spring 2022 Couture

Clio Peppiatt x Annie’s Ibiza current collab collection

Lawrence Basse (all her work tbh)

Zuhair Murad Fall 2022

Tran Hung Fall 2017

Alexander McQueen Menswear Fall 2022 and 2018

Christian Dior Resort 2023

Janelle Monae’s Pre-Dirty Computer Era

Thierry Mugler (his entire body of work tbh but rn I like Resort 2021)

Hawwa (@hellohawwa)

Jarvis Aivali (@jarvisaivali)

This is not to mention my love for pre-colonial Filipino textiles, 1920s butch lesbian fashion, charro suits, whatever the look is called with the giant oversized floral button shirt and the jeans is, bright colorful floral/and or embroidered suits, ami thompson’s knight and princess characters, and the catholic met gala specifically.

#long post… sorry hehe #fashion #ask #I have a lot of thoughts. hope this answered ur question hahaha

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gothicvalentine · 2 years

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😭 I know I'm obsessed with Malleus. I even put that fact in my bio.

What I didn't realize -- until about 10 minutes ago -- was exactly how obsessed I am with this FICTIONAL damn goth dragon!

I am really hoping most people don't read my tags now lol. I saw one of my mutuals post an ask that had a link to art of first year Idia Shroud, with short hair. It's really great art and even short haired Idia is very pretty.

I liked the original post of the artwork and stuck it in my queue. But not after adding my tags. Which started out on the subject of how and why Idia became dorm leader and then ended up becoming a whole ass novella about Malleus! Pretty much anything will make me think of Malleus and then I get sidetracked and go off on a tangent. I have so many feelings about him. Like ALL the feelings! 😭

At this point, I wholly understand that Japanese guy who married a fictional character. I probably wouldn't have a public wedding though 😂. He's much braver than I!

Honestly, though the Idia being dorm leader thing is very confusing to me because he so obviously loathes being dorm leader.

Knowing Ignihyde students, none of them want to be dorm leader either. So it seems to me that someone was able to force Idia to be the dorm leader?

But who and how? Because we know that Idia really only seems to care about Ortho (and gaming lol). And from what I've seen, Ortho is the only one who can convince Idia to do something he doesn't want to.

But I've also seen where, at least once, even Ortho was not able to convince Idia to do something. Ortho is able to get Idia to reluctantly agree to attend the ceremony, but then Idia had a change of heart and stood Ortho up. (Idia's ceremonial robes story)

Here's where the problem with my brain and my tags begins . . . . (this is gonna get long folks, grab a beer and pull up a stool)

:read more:

This makes me start thinking about how Idia runs into Malleus out on one of his walks. Malleus is curious as to why Idia is wearing his ceremony robes and I can't remember what Idia's excuse was, but Idia didn't mention the ceremony at all.

So poor Malleus is confused and apparently just thinks Idia is a weirdo and doesn't question it more than that. Malleus is a stranger in a strange land. And he's been completely isolated and pretty much alone for hundreds of years?

It's never stated, but it's implied to be a very, very long time. Dude hasn't been socialized well with other FAE, let alone with humans!

He must be so confused by their behavior most of the time and their strange and baffling technology. He must have extreme culture shock.

Think about if the only knowledge you had about a certain subject was something you read from a book written by someone 500 years ago. And you had no idea that there had been updates and progress. Soooo much progress and change. Which you aren't used to.

I can't begin to imagine how surprising yet confusing that must be for Malleus! Particular as it's shown that he didn't think much could be learned in only 4 years and he didn't think the human lifespan was enough time to really accomplish anything. Apparently fae culture doesn't change much or at least not rapidly.

I keep thinking about how Malleus is so unused to human gadgets and technology and I'd love to see his reaction to finding out the rate at which computer and cell phone technology advances! 😂 He'd definitely have his adorable shocked Pikachu face! 😁🥰

I love how he's starting to reevaluate what he previously thought about humans and their ability to do so much with their very limited lifespans. And I absolutely adore how he believes that "misinformed knowledge is the source of all prejudice" and says he thinks that he'd like to study humans and learn more about them.

In light of the fact that we know there was a war between humans and the fae and his parents are both deceased, I'm worried that we'll find out they were killed in the fae/human war.

If that turns out to be the case, then this makes Malleus all the more amazing to me. Because it would be only natural to not have any positive feelings or beliefs about a group of people your country was at war with. Especially if someone you loved was killed by the opposing side.

We don't know how old Malleus was either but he may have been really young. And to have their parents killed . . . to a child's eyes, would be terrifying and life shattering. Malleus didn't even have friends or anyone that could help him process his loss and provide support and comfort, other than his grandmother (who sounds like she's always too busy to spend much time with Mal) and Lilia.

Yet his first real friend is a magic-less human and he's kind of adopted Silver (it seems like he's more like an uncle or big brother to Silver though, rather than co-parent). And he's curious about humans and their many cultures and actively wants to learn more about them.

It sounds as if Malleus is attempting to try to repair fae/human relations. He says several things which make it sound like this war was so long ago that the fae have been forgotten by everyone. It seems like Malleus has decided Briar Valley has been isolated and forgotten for far too long. And I think that he's decided, as king, that he wants to change that.

Malleus is naturally a very curious person, and I know his reason for being at NRC is for him to have new experiences and for him to have a chance to learn about the world outside Briar Valley. Perhaps it's also a chance, for a short amount of time, for him to be in a place which doesn't require him to be Prince Malleus all the time. He wants to be or at least is trying to be a regular student, "just like you."

However, I don't think this is the only reason he decided to attend NRC. I hope he can make connections and bring some innovations to Briar Valley. I hope he can manage to change the hearts and minds of his subjects. The humans who fought against the fae are probably long gone, but many Briar Valley fae probably personally fought in the war and probably very few of them are as forgiving as Lilia and Malleus are (and Sebek's mom!).

I hope Malleus plans to help his people integrate with the world outside of the valley. I hope he can improve their lives by bringing in some technology so they can be connected to the rest of Twisted Wonderland so they can be up to date on changes and the news of other nations.

From a security standpoint even, rulers need to be aware of the actions of even allied nations in case they decide to change alliances and start wars. It's important to not be completely in the dark in case relations sour.

And before I finish a 200 page novel about my latest Malleus thoughts . . . I'd just like to say that I think it would be so cute if Idia and Malleus could be friends? Idia could help Malleus with tech and help him get Briar Valley connected and they may be very different in their personalities, yet they do have things in common with one another. At least as far as how people judge Malleus unreasonably without first even giving him a chance. And true or not, Idia believes they do the same with him.

If you're not a dick to Malleus, he seems to be really non-judgmental about most things and I certainly can't see him thinking Idia has weird hair and judging him for something stupid like that.

Hell, Leona is a full on asshole to Malleus pretty much always, but Malleus just threatens him. And when Malleus threatens Leona (and honestly most people he threatens), it seems like he's just reminding them of what he could do if they pushed him too far.

I think very few of Mal's threats are genuine. I've really only seen two times that I can remember where I think Malleus was enraged to the point that he would have acted on his threats. Both times were during the first Halloween event. And granted, I think murder probably would have been a bit excessive . . . but the way they treated Malleus, who was being very polite to them, literally sickened me.

Someone outside of Mal's entourage should have punched those people in their faces. Like Yuu, lol!

In Malleus's defense, every dorm had one person who planned to commit murder. FFS, Ortho was going to blow up everything and level the entire school! Even Idia started panicking when he was struggling to reprogram Ortho.

Can I remind people that's not the only time Ortho has almost committed extreme violence? Chapter 6 is heavily foreshadowing Ortho doing bad things.

Yet Ortho, much like an adorable like Chihuahua, is almost universally seen (in the fandom and at NRC) as cute and harmless. Meanwhile, Malleus is seen by basically everyone at NRC and some in the fandom as the evil pitbull. Dangerous and scary. (I've never been scared of pitbulls either, lol. I've always thought they were super cute, but I've never had a negative interaction with one either.)

Ok, I had to get some of that off of my chest because I don't want to argue with people or tell them their opinion is wrong (because it's not--an opinion is only that--it's just the way someone views something and it's ok for people to view things differently), yet it also bothers me to see people saying that Malleus gets really angry very easily and they act as if they believe he would follow through on all of his threats.

Maybe he would. After all, I don't know him either or what he thinks (as much as one could know or understand someone who doesn't actually exist). But it seems like he recognizes his duty and responsibility as future king and that, as such, he represents the entirety of his kingdom.

If Malleus were to commit some egregious act, it would not only reflect poorly on him, but on all residents of Briar Valley, and to some extent all fae. If he were to murder a human or humans or level the school or something similar, it's not outside the realm of possibility that humans would see that attack on one of their own as an attack against all humans and therefore a declaration of war. If the future king of the fae kills humans I could totally see people viewing that as an act of war as he's essentially the leader of his country. Or close enough that even if people have no issue with Mal's grandmother, they may see Malleus as taking a more violent approach to leadership. Or at the very least, a more unpredictable and unstable leader.

Malleus is not stupid and he's at least somewhat aware of that after Silver gently chides Malleus when he nearly loses control. Silver reminds Malleus that he had told them he wanted to "avoid any aggressions towards other species" and then asks Malleus "what if this feeds into hostilities?"

From what Malleus says after he's calmed down enough to think rationally, it's obvious that he's ashamed and probably really embarrassed that he lost his composure and was ready to commit violence. Like all the NRC students Malleus is arrogant and being as powerful as he is, both magically and physically, as well as being a prince who has lived for perhaps hundreds of years -- I'm sure he's shocked that he lost control of his emotions and temper.

He may have had hundreds of years to work on controlling his emotions (which is a really bad idea tbh), but he is used to people who probably all show deference to him and respect his authority.

Humans are a whole different breed. The magicam type of person probably wouldn't treat their own nation's leaders with respect, let alone the ruler of another nation.

Malleus was neither prepared for nor did he expect anyone to not only be horribly rude to him, but to treat him like he wasn't even a living being. They treated him like an object, who only existed for their amusement so they could get likes on their magicam feed.

Lord, I think I'm finally finished getting all my thoughts and headcanons out there and "on paper." If I printed this out, it probably wouldn't be 200 pages, but I'd be afraid of how long it would be.

I haven't spent this much time writing anything since I wrote my college theses! I remember that being a nightmare to write though and this wasn't.

Of course all I did was write out all the Malleus thoughts in my head (for now lol).

I apologize for any errors if you put yourselves through the torture of reading this all. I started out proofreading and then I added twice as much content.

My last job was proofreading 8 hours a day, so I really don't feel like spending even more time editing the rest of this. And knowing me, I'm likely to make more additions if I look at it again. 🙄

#my thoughts #Malleus Draconia #Malleus Draconia thoughts and headcanons #long post #very long post #i'm not kidding #i used to be so quiet #but when I'm in a certain mood #or if I'm talking about something i really love #i can't shut up #and God forbid if I'm writing #everyone at work hated when I'd send emails #they'd be paragraphs when others could condense shit into a sentence or two #wtf is wrong with me?#Malleus obsessed #I'm not sure if I'd be more obsessed if Malleus was actually real #or if I'd be over him since there would probably be more info on him via twst internet and magazines #you know even if there's not actually very much known about Mal #that I'm sure there would still be all sorts of articles and gossipy type shit online #and 99.9% of it would be made up bs #there's probably articles about him sacrificing human children or something crazy #i do not envy Malleus at all #being famous and unimaginably powerful plus being an actual dragon and royalty #like who tf would find Mal relatable?#even if they got past their fear of him #i would like to have some magic though #that would be cool #twst spoilers #twisted wonderland spoilers #twst jp

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nashibirne · 3 years

Text

Gimme Shelter - 7

Here it is, the last chapter of Gimme Shelter. It took me a while to write it, I kinda had a hard time to let Kat and Henry go... I'm going to miss them. I hope you like the ending I chose for these two. If so, please let me know by leaving a comment, reblog or like. Feedback is much appreciated. 💜

Pairing: Henry Cavill x OFC (Kat Spencer)

Words: ~ 4.5 k

Summary: Henry has to deal with a personal crisis and he finds shelter with his old rugby mate Sam and his sister Kat. She used to be Henry’s best friend a very long time ago. Will they be able to become friends again or maybe even more? Chapter 7: An important conversation, a celebration and lots of love.

You can find the previous chapters and my other fics on my masterlist!

Warnings: RPF, mention of mental health issues, smut, sex (p in v), vanilla, unprotected sex, nsfw, 18+, fluff

UNBETA'ED! English is not my mother tongue, so expect bad grammar, wrong spelling, chaotic punctuation and clumsy language. All mistakes are mine…

I got a little help with a certain paragraph, thank you so much @sillyrabbit81 for your advice and your support. Love ya 💕

Credits: Pics for the moodboard from Pinterest. Face claims: Kat = Jennifer Connelly

Disclaimer: I don’t know the real Henry Cavill or anyone who's related to him in any way, this is pure fiction and a lot of wishful thinking.

Tag list (let me know if you want to be added or removed)

@lunedelorient @inlovewithhisblueeyes @willkatfanfromasia @hell1129-blog @mis-lil-red @agniavateira @kebabgirl67 @omgkatinka @legendarywizarddetective @summersong69 @taebfada @xxxkatxo @artandotherdelights @notabronte @littlefreya @luclittlepond @eldarwen333 @meowpurrbooks @marantha @liliumdream @enchantedbytomandhenry @greensleeves888 @witcherfan @margauxmargaux07 @radaofrivia @m07belzen @a-little-counter-esperanto @starstruckkittyangel @mary-ann84 @sillyrabbit81 @emelinelovesjc @wheretheriversrunintothesea @lam0ureuxq @kingliam2019

Let the grand finale begin....

***********

"There's no need to be nervous, Kat."

Henry gave her a smile before taking a sip of his coffee.

They were sitting at their gate, waiting to board the plane that was going to fly them to Jersey.

"I know", Kat sighed, shaking her head slowly, "but I still am. I haven't seen your family in years, there will be so many people I don't know…"

"And they will love you. Look, Kitty, today is gonna be relaxed. You'll meet my parents, my brothers and their families and that's it. Just a casual dinner. Tomorrow there will be the celebration and I promise you it's gonna be great. My folks know how to party," he winked at her with a grin, "and on Sunday everyone except for my parents will be gone and we have a whole week to relax and just enjoy the island and our time together. Okay?"

"Okay," she smiled at him and took a bite of the muffin she had bought at one of the airport cafes, "I'll try to relax. Just distract me, tell me something... anything."

"That's the text for Instagram. The open letter to my fans and followers."

"Well, actually there's really something I want to talk to you about", Henry said reluctantly. He grabbed his phone and opened his google docs. "I need your opinion on this." He gave her his mobile.

Kat saw that the display showed a long text. "What's that?"

"I see," Kat chewed on her lip, looking him in the eyes, "and you want me to proofread it?"

"I want to know what you think about it."

"Alright. Let's see."

She stared at the words on the screen with a beating heart. Henry had been working on this statement quite a while now and she knew it would include his plans for the future. They had talked about different scenarios but she didn't know what he'd finally decided to do with his life and his work. She was curious but at the same time she was scared because many of these scenarios meant that he was going to leave St. Ives and her life. She took a deep breath and started to read.

The statement was deep and of unabashed openness. The way Henry described what he had gone through in the past year was very touching and she had to fight back tears several times. Relief flooded her when she read that he was asking his fans to give him a little more time to reorientate and that he intended to remain in the background for a little longer, stating that he was very happy at the sanctuary he had found and that good friends had given him shelter. What left her completely amazed was the last paragraph.

"Kal is going to take over your Instagram?"

Henry grinned sheepishly.

"Yeah. For a while. I think it's a good solution. I'm going to post pictures of him with captions that let people know what I'm doing without giving up my privacy until I'm ready to return and face the public again. It's my way of letting my fans be a part of my life although I'm not really present. I want to share what I'm up to but not the way I used to do it. I want to do more than promotion and I want to be more than a thirst trap, Kitty."

"You're much more than that, Hen", she took his hands in hers, looking at him with a frown, "so much more."

He gave her a grateful smile.

"I know that but many people don't and that's my own fault. The way I've presented myself on social media was very one-sided in the last year and it will be interesting to find out how many of my 17 Mio followers still like me when all they'll get to see in the next weeks is my dog. The ones that remain are the ones that count and in the future I want them to see who I am and what's important to me. I have picked three topics I want to concentrate on. First: conversation and protection of species in cooperation with Durrell. Second: mental health, focusing on problems men often face. I want to found a charitable trust that helps and supports men with mental health issues and that raises awareness of that topic. Thirdly: Fitness, because it's such an important part of my life. I want to show how good moving can make you feel but I also want to show the risks of overdoing it and that even very fit people can still have body issues and how I deal with these issues myself."

"First of all I think the statement you want to post is great. It's so sincere and you open up so much... It's a risk because you expose yourself but I think people will appreciate your honesty and I'm sure many can identify with what you've been through. And your plans sound fantastic, Henry. I know how important these topics are to you and you're going to be a great ambassador for all of this because it's authentic. This is you, people will notice and appreciate that." She couldn't help but give him a spontaneous hug. "God, Henry, I'm so happy for you."

Henry let out a sigh and shrugged, looking at Kat with an expression full of doubt and insecurity.

"What do you think?"

He hugged her back, pulling her into a tight embrace. "That's such a relief, Kat. I was worried it might sound stupid."

"Not a bit! It sounds perfect. But what about work? Do you already know where to go with your job?"

He took a deep breath.

"Yes. I want to return to filming but I want to leave my comfort zone a bit and try to get different kinds of roles. I'll have to talk to my agent and hope that he can find some interesting projects for me. I also thought about going on the stage again. Back to the roots, maybe I will find a theater that is willing to give me a chance. But that's just an idea, I'm open to anything. I just know for sure that I love my job. I want to be an actor and I'm ready to work again."

"And you will work again. I'm sure. Are you going to tell your family about your plans?"

"Sure. It will be a great relief for them to see that I'm back on track."

"Of course. It's a relief for me too."

"I know…"

They were interrupted by the announcement that boarding was about to start and so they got on the plane, heading to Jersey with a pretty good feeling.

****

36 hours later Kat was still feeling pretty good. The garden party was in full swing and she really enjoyed the jolly atmosphere, the food, the drinks and most of all Henry's company. His family had given her a very warm welcome and so she had a very good time. The garden was beautifully decorated and lit by countless torches, candles and chinese lanterns. A local band was playing cover songs on a little stage and a clown was entertaining the children.

It was almost midnight when Henry turned to her with a smile.

"Time for the big surprise."

"Can't wait. You've been such a mystery-monger lately."

"I know, but you'll soon know why."

"Well, you want to surprise your mum. Isn't that the reason?" Kat was visibly confused and Henry gave her one of his perfectly imperfect winks.

"My mum and...you. Maybe?"

He went away with a grin and left Kat with a beating heart. What kind of surprise could he possibly have for her? On his mother's birthday? She smoothened out her plain black dress with a nervous gesture before she followed Henry with her eyes, her arms resting on the cocktail table right in front of the stage. When he grabbed the microphone, Kat assumed he wanted to hold a speech, maybe telling his family and friends about his future plans but when he turned to the band leader for a whispered exchange she knew there was more to it. Henry nodded at each of the band members and Kat could tell he was nervous by his body language.

"Hello everyone," his deep voice echoed through the speakers, "I'm sorry to interrupt, I know everyone is having a great time and don't worry, I'm not going to bore you with a speech, but I still have prepared a little something. A surprise."

He flashed a bright smile at his mother, ignoring the teasing cheers and whistles coming from his brothers.

"Mum, I racked my brain over a special present for weeks. What would make you happy? What would surprise you? Eventually I had this idea I knew you'd love but that really got me out of my comfort zone. I worked hard on it and I hope you and everybody else will like the result." Henry cleared his throat with a sheepish smile.

"Come on man, spill it." That was Henry's younger brother Charlie and Kat couldn't help but chuckle when his older brother Simon joined in.

"Yeah, Hen, the suspense is killing us."

Henry shook his head, laughing and Marianne Cavill shushed her sons with an amused smile.

"Okay, well... I'm going to sing for you."

"Oh please, spare us. You can't sing." Charlie again, he'd always been a cheeky guy and obviously he hadn't changed a bit. Henry laughed out loud, pointing his finger at Charles.

"Right, brother, that's why I took lessons. I spent many, many hours at our neighbour's who is a vocal coach. Kat is my witness."

All eyes turned on her now and she couldn't give them much more than a shrug, a nod and a smile to confirm his words. She wasn't able to say anything, but her mind was racing. He had been taking singing lessons with Mel, who had been a music teacher and vocal coach before her marriage. The revelation hit her hard and unexpected, flooding her with relief and a hint of shame. She had been so suspicious all this time without a reason. Nothing had been going on between Hen and Mel, nothing inappropriate, nothing intimate. He had been telling the truth.

Henry's voice interrupted her thoughts and she took a deep breath, turning her attention to what was happening on stage.

The band started to play and Kat immediately recognized the song, Green, Green Grass of Home, and when Henry began to sing she was completely captivated by his full, warm and dark voice. He did great up there and it didn't take people long to pull out lighters and smartphones to wave them in the air to the slow rhythm of the song, creating a sea of lights that illuminated the garden.

"Well...I better get started before I chicken out and change my mind." He nodded at the band with a grateful smile.

"We only had the chance to rehearse two times so please be lenient with me. Thanks guys for playing along and allowing me to take over... Anyway, I've prepared three songs. Enjoy."

Kat looked at Mrs Cavill, no, at Marianne -it still felt strange to call her by her first name- and she was beaming, tears of pride and joy sparkling in her eyes. Kat was incredibly happy and proud too, it just felt so good to see Henry perform, completely at ease with himself, confident and charming as ever.

The next song seemed to be some kind of family hymn. After only a few lines of Neil Diamond's Sweet Caroline everybody was singing along, even the kids, and Kat joined in, soaking up the jolly atmosphere and the good mood that was so infectious. Henry obviously had a great time too. He was smiling all over his face and it made Kat glad to see him so relaxed and happy. Before he began singing the last song, he spoke softly into the microphone.

"The next one is for everyone who's in love. Grab your loved ones and get on the dancefloor, it's time for slow-dancing", and after a little pause he added, "this one's for you, Kat."

I know that you've been hurt before

He looked her straight in the eyes and his words sent shivers down her spine. She noticed the curious glances people gave her and she knew she was blushing but she did her best to pretend to be cool, calm and collected, taking a sip of her red wine. When the music set in, Kat easily recognized the song. It was a slow version -Henry's version- of a Curtis Stigers song and she already loved it after the first few words. She knew the lyrics by heart and thinking about them awoke the butterflies in her belly.

Happy couples filled the dancefloor looking lovingly at each other, dancing slowly to the music. Henry's full voice was perfect for the song and he kept looking at Kat. Their eyes were locked and to her it felt like no one else was around, like Henry was singing just for her.

But that won't happen anymore, no no

Just give your heart to me

And I'll guard it with my life

I don't know what I'd do

Baby, without you

His words found their way right into her heart and for the first time in 22 years she felt ready to finally let go of the past, to completely trust him again, to believe him and to forgive him.

You're all that matters to me

The ground that you walk

The air that you breathe

Someday you'll discover

I don't want no other, believe me

You're all that matters, baby

All that matters to me

She realized that a teardrop was rolling down her cheek and she wiped it away hastily. Concern was showing in Henry's eyes when he saw that she was crying but the smile she gave him showed him it was a tear of joy and relief flooded him. He couldn't wait to finish the song now, couldn't wait to dance with Kat, to hold her in his arms.

Loud applause followed his performance, accompanied by calls for an encore that he declined politely with a shy smile. Henry made sure to tell the band to continue with some ballads and after receiving some very tight hugs and kisses from his extremely happy and proud mother he finally joined Kat at their table.

"Fancy a dance?" He offered her his hand with a charming smirk.

She nodded and took his hand, following him to the dance floor where he pulled her close. They swayed slowly to "You Are The Sunshine of my life" for a while without saying anything, content with just looking at each other, before Kat broke the silence.

"You were great up there."

"You liked it?"

"I loved it, Hen. You have a wonderful voice. Mel seems to be a good coach." Kat gave him a sheepish smile.

"Yeah, she is. Once she'd realized that I wasn't interested in more than singing lessons she was very professional and pretty strict."

Henry grinned at her, gently tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It was supposed to be a surprise and I wanted you to trust me." He shrugged, giving her a tender smile.

"And I didn't. I let you down. I was such an idiot, Henry. I should have believed you, I am so sor…"

"No, Kitty, please... don't apologize, okay?" He looked at her with a frown, seriousness showing in his eyes. "You had every right to be mistrustful, I understand that. Just tell me that you think you will be able to trust me again some day."

"I already do. I…"

They bumped into another couple and it wasn't the first time. The dance floor was crowded and everyone was keen on congratulating Henry on his performance. It felt like every single party guest was watching them.

"Wanna leave?"

"Yes," Kat nodded with a smile.

****

"It's so peaceful, isn't it?"

"It is. It's beautiful." Kat squeezed Henry's hand before resting her head against his shoulder. They were walking down the beach along the dark shore, that was romantically enlightened by a bright full moon hand, in hand. The sea was calm, just giving off its soothing sounds and a cool breeze that made Kat shiver. Henry took off his jacket and wrapped it around her shoulders.

"Thanks", Kat said with a smile, "not only for the jacket but for bringing me here and for this wonderful night."

"Did you enjoy the party?"

"Of course, it was so much fun and I loved your performance. Especially the third song."

Henry stopped walking and turned to her, taking both of her hands in his, looking her deep in the eyes.

"Every single word was true, Kat. I meant it. I'd never hurt you again. You're really all that matters to me. I know you find it hard to believe me, but…"

"I believe you," Kat cut in, "I felt it. I feel it now."

Henry stared at her. "You do?"

"Fuck, yes, I do!" Kat threw her head back, laughing out loud, feeling incredibly happy and light-hearted all of the sudden. "And I feel the same, Hen. Exactly the same."

She cupped his face with her hands and did what she had been longing to do for so long. She kissed him. It was a gentle kiss, almost shy and when Henry felt her mouth on his, her soft lips united with his, skin on skin, no tongue, just tenderness and love, he was beyond happy and savoured every single second.

When Kat pulled away reluctantly he rested his forehead against hers taking a deep breath.

"I feel like 17 again", he whispered.

Kat laughed softly at his words. "So do I. It feels great."

The next kiss started off just like the previous one, innocent and sweet, but when Henry pulled Kat close to deepen the kiss all the bottled-up sexual tension and energy, all the suppressed passion and desire of more than 20 years erupted and they started to make out hungrily, starving for love and intimacy. After a while things really heated up and Henry was the one to put the brakes on when Kat started to fumble with his fly.

"If you don't want me to take you right here we better take it to the bedroom, Kitty", Henry sighed, his voice thick with arousal and desire.

"Well, I've never done it on the beach…", Kat smirked, biting her lower lip.

"Seriously? Here?" Henry took a look around checking if the coast was clear.

"I was joking, Hen. I hate having sand in every pore." Kat nudged him with a grin. "Just take me home."

They made it to the cottage in record time and started to undress each other right in the little hallway, kissing and fumbling like teenagers. While Kat was unzipping Henry's trousers, he was unsuccessfully trying to open her bra.

"Front clasp, Hen", Kat explained to him breathlessly.

"Fuck", Henry chuckled, "I swear I'm not gonna be that clueless once I'll have you naked."

"Good," she answered with a lewd smile, stripping off her bra when he'd finally managed to open it, standing in front of him in just her panties.

"God, you're beautiful, Kitty." Henry let his eyes wander all over her body while stepping out of his pants. He took off his socks and now he was facing her naked too, except for his briefs.

"You don't look so bad yourself, pop."

She grabbed him by the hem of his underwear, pulling him close for another kiss. Kat gasped when he lifted her up effortlessly, wrapping her legs around his waist, feeling his hard-on pressing against her wet panties. She moaned into his mouth when he moved his hips, dry humping her teasingly. Henry carried Kat to his bedroom and laid her down on the bed. He stripped off her pants before he did the same with his and when they finally were both naked he climbed on top of her, looking her deep in the eyes, before kissing her again. It was a long, slow kiss and Kat let her fingers run over his back till they reached his butt. She squeezed his ass and pulled him close, sighing with lust when Henry started to kiss her tits and to suck her nipples. She reached between her legs and grabbed his dick that was pretty impressive, giving it a few strokes that made him moan loudly.

"Fuck, Kat...I need you…I need to feel you...now."

She brought the tip of his cock to her entrance, bucking her hips, inviting him in.

"Take me. I'm yours, Henry."

"Are you on birth control?"

"I am, don't worry. Just go for it. Please."

Her words weren't more than a hoarse whisper but Henry heard them crystal clear. He moaned again when he realized that it was finally going to happen. He was about to make love to Kat and it was like a dream come true. A hot, sexy, wet dream and he couldn't help but feel a little nervous. He penetrated Kat slowly, gently, enjoying the moment that marked the beginning of their first time.

"God, Hen…", Kat moaned softly as he stretched her pussy, kneading his ass and lifting her hips to meet him halfway, "you feel great."

"I love you, Henry," she whispered before she came with a loud moan. She arched her back and Henry felt the shiver that ran through her body and the contraction of her pussy that tightened around his cock. The feelings that flooded him were more than Henry could take and he cried her name out loud when he got off, releasing an enormous amount of cum and the thought of filling her up like this made him thrust into her cunt hard and deep one last time. "Fuck...Kitty." He collapsed on top of her, gasping and panting, holding her tight, pressing a kiss on her lips. Henry looked her in the eyes with a loving smile.

He started to move slowly once he filled her completely, looking her in the eyes. It was impossible to turn back time. He wasn't her first, she wasn't his first but he still intended to make their first time together feel special, he didn't want to fuck her mindless, he wanted to make tender love to her. He thrusted a little faster and deeper now and Kat followed his rhythm, her gaze resting on his face. They shared another sensual kiss, moving in sync for a wonderful long time, prolonging the intimate moment as much as possible, enjoying the sensation of closeness, their bodies and souls connected.

Henry's moans got louder, turning into raspy grunts which was a great turn on for Kat, who was a panting mess. Breathing heavily she was getting closer to cumming with every thrust that hit her cervix, with every stroke, brushing against her g-spot, with his lower body pressing and rubbing against her clit. She watched Henry, who had his head bent back now, eyes half closed, his upper body propped up on his elbows that were placed left and right of her torso. She wrapped her legs around him, making him go even deeper before she grabbed his head and pulled him in for a sweet kiss. They locked eyes and his gaze was full of tenderness, his pupils tinted black and filled with lust.

"I love you too, Kat."

A few minutes later they were lying side by side, holding hands, their faces turned to each other.

"We should have done that 22 years ago."

Henry grinned at Kat, stroking her cheek with his thumb.

"I doubt it would have been so good. Teenage Kat was very self-conscious and a little prude and I guess teenage Henry wasn't a pro at handling this weapon right from the start." Kat touched his dick and gave him a teasing wink that made Henry chuckle.

"Right. We've come a long way. It just feels like we've wasted so much time...all these years."

"We can't change that, Hen", Kat said, "but we can make the most of the time that's still to come. Let's just be happy together from now on. Let's spend as much time together as possible, let's have lots and lots of fucking great sex, let's have fun, let's share our joys and sorrows, let's share our lives."

****

Epilogue

Two years later.

Kat sat at her desk in her office with a happy smile on her face. Mr. Darcy was sleeping on her lap and she held a letter in her hands. Bringing it close to her nose she took a deep breath, smelling Henry's scent, his tangy, musky cologne. It was a habit they had established in the last years. Whenever Henry and Kat were separated for more than a few days they sent each other love letters. Handwritten in ink, the exclusive, handmade writing paper perfumed with their odours, the lines filled with their love. The letters usually weren't long, most of the time they shared just short poems or simply a few sentences about how their days had been without each other. It was their old fashioned way of showing their affection and of staying in touch in addition to their conversations via phone or facetime.

"A letter from daddy", Kat whispered, stroking her round belly tenderly. Eight weeks to go until they would welcome their first child and a little more than half a year until their wedding. "Let's see what it's saying."

Kat opened the letter carefully and pulled out the thick paper to unfold it.

"My darling Kitty,

Only three days to go until I finally can take you in my arms again. I can't wait to kiss your lips and your belly to greet you and our little bean. I don't have much time, you know how tight my schedule is, but I needed to write down this poem for you. It would make a great wedding vow, don't you think? Just read it and let me know how you feel about it when I'm back.

"Mouthful Of Forevers

I am not the first person you loved. You are not the first person I looked at with a mouthful of forevers. We have both known loss like the sharp edges of a knife. We have both lived with lips more scar tissue than skin.

Our love came unannounced in the middle of the night. Our love came when we’d given up on asking love to come. I think that has to be part of its miracle. This is how we heal.

I will kiss you like forgiveness. You will hold me like I’m hope. Our arms will bandage and we will press promises between us like flowers in a book.

I will write sonnets to the salt of sweat on your skin. I will write novels to the scar of your nose. I will write a dictionary of all the words I have used trying to describe the way it feels to have finally, finally found you.

And I will not be afraid of your scars. I know sometimes it’s still hard to let me see you in all your cracked perfection, but please know: whether it’s the days you burn more brilliant than the sun or the nights you collapse into my lap your body broken into a thousand questions, you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

I will love you when you are a still day. I will love you when you are a hurricane."

Isn't it perfect for us?

by Clementine von Radics

I love you!

Forever yours,

Henry"

***********

The End

#henry cavill #cavillry #henry cavill fandom #henry cavill rpf #henry cavill x ofc #henry cavill smut #friends to lovers #slow burn #Spotify

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thepeakyfckingblinders · 4 years

Text

Never Again || Thomas Shelby x reader

credits to @saralou23 for the gif

⤠ MASTERLIST⤟

Anon requested/summary: “can I request a fic where the reader is found unconscious or faints in the shop or something and tommy freaks out? I just find protective tommy so ❤️💓💟!! Thank you, your writing is absolutely INCREDIBLE” (Thank you so much honeybun, you’re making me blush, pls, forgive me for being late ❤️)

Warnings: swearing, bossy Tommy, basically Tommy freaking out and being overprotective, me always loving him with all of my mangled soul

Author’s notes:

I hope you are okay darlings, I love you, please stay safe ♡

I’m so sorry for being this late, I have no excuses, forgive me. Also the end sucks, but I’m struggling with my writing lately, so, sorry again.

I love protective Thomas so much, he’s an ass, but he’s a softie, and I’m gonna lose my mind some day.

Behind each one of these works there are sleepless nights and something really close to multiple mental breakdowns, so, please, take a minute to send me a message about it, I need actual actual feedbacks to understand how to improve my skills and grow ♡

If you want to be added to my tag list, please, directly message me

I’m Italian, English isn’t my first language, so I apologize for every possible mistake I made. Also, please, help me improve my writing by telling me if there’s something wrong

ENJOY!

Birmingham’s gelid air hit your sensitive skin with no mercy as soon as your red mary-janes crossed the doorway of the Garrison, only to disgracefully sink into the greyish muddy loam in which the whole of Small Heath seemed to be covered.

Your fingers felt like rigid appendages burdening your already wearied arms, while you tried your best to wrap them around your coat’s edges, in a disperate effort to keep that warm tissue on your bulging clavicles left exposed by the woollen dress you were wearing. No matter how many heavy clothes you decided to put on, that implacable cold still succeeded in making you feel constantly out of forces, debilitated to the core; it had always been that way, since you were nothing more than a little girl obliged to spend one every two months confined in your bedroom, afflicted by incredibly high fever and sometimes even bronchitis.

Truth was that your body had never got used to England’s humid weather, yet, even though you poor healt had previously put you in danger, for your sake, thanks to the enormous progresses made by medicine in the past fifteen years, it was now easy to fight against the ruthless chill of those endless winters. Plus, since the earliest days of your attendence, your wardrobe had been perpetually refreshed with high-quality pieces perfectly in step with the times, for your fiancée had been literally covering you in furs and duvets of all kinds, concerned as he was that you could’ve eventually caught another bad fever, whose deathly consequences he had already experienced on his own thick skin. And for no reason in the world he would’ve even risked to lose you too.

So, as everybody could’ve easily predicted, Thomas was perennially paying attention to your wellbeing: the most famous specialists from inside and outside the United Kingdom had come directly to your country house; if one thing could be taken for granted, it was that your medications would always be settled on your side cabinet, together with a glass of fresh water, every day and every night; and, come hell or high water, he would accompany you during your routine visits to the hospital, even when it meant leaving all of his business without any prior warning.

Needless to say, you were perfectly able to do those things on your own -pheraps except for getting a crowd of world renowned doctors in your living room- and you sure as hell had tried to persuade him that there was no need at all for being so preoccupied all the time; still, he was Tommy Shelby, he simply couldn’t help it.

The concern for his loved ones’ lives kept stealing his sleep, even on those nights when there was no trace of imminent dangers on the horizon, it kept excoriating the insides of his drained brains, to the point that, more than once, you’d had to sleep alone in your immense king-size bed or reach for him in his study, curling up on one of his uncomfortable armchairs, ready to appease his fears as best you could. In short, for as much as you needed him to relax, you were still able to understand his protective behavior, against which, as a matter of fact, no one could do much; thus you at least tried not to give him more reasons to be worried by paying some extra attention to all those small things you could solve without Tommy even knowing about it. Regularly taking your iron tablets, for example. Nonetheless, it had now been already a week since the Peaky Blinders had started a brand new business involving in effect every metalworking factory in and around Birmingham, and the whole family, you and Tom included, had been so turbulently tied up with work to let every other thought and need slither on the back burner. As a direct consequence, your doctor’s latest prescription was unfortunately left lying on the bottom of your drawer, that being the fourth day in a row you’d spent without taking those pills, and, even though everything appeared to be going well until then, that one Thursday morning your period eventually came and stroke the fatal blow, having you feel so faint and aching that, all of a sudden, the few metres separating your side of the street from the betting shop seemed to implausibly dilate right under your blurred vision, a vexing sense of nausea assaulting your empty stomach led you to lean against a lamppost, your skin still crawling beneath all those heavy tissues. Dizziness and lethargy almost took over your sore mind, before you shook your head with an abrupt move in a bid to dispel those unpleasent sensations; clients would’ve arrived in less than a hour, Esme had taken John’s kids on a brief fieldtrip, Michael was already in his office, the boys were making their usual rounds of the mills, Finn and Isaiah were dealing with a couple folks in need back at the Garrison and Polly was nowhere in sight, which made you the only available blinder for the opening and, with Friday’s race approaching, there was no way the box-office could remain shut. Hence, more determined than ever, you chocked down the knot forming in your throat due to queasiness and just forced youself to put one foot in front of the other onto the dusty road, until you reached the shop door, not without the risk of tripping over multiple times in the process. Your frozen fingers clutched to the small side-wall now carring all of your weight, whilst your lungs tried to let in as much air as possible. And it worked, each plodding breath seemed to fight your sickness, also your heartbeat was gradually slowing down, thus you shut your eyelids and continued to inhale deeply for a full minute, before your trembilng hand managed to finally turn the key in the lock, giving you free access to the place.

However, the small click produced by the latch closing again did not live to reach your ears, for they were already brimful of ominous hisses, in a scant moment a bulk of hypnotic grey worms prevented you from seeing anything else, they relentlessly squirmed in front of your dilated pupils, that repulsing view sending brutal shooks straight to your clenched stomach, again. And, before you even had a chance to realize what was going on, your brain completely blacked out.

~ ~ ~

Words would not be sufficient to describe the fright taking over Arthur’s features the second your inert silhouette entered his line of sight. Just returned from their daily patrol, he had indeed noticed a small crowd waiting outside the office, cursing and fussing because of the lacked opening, and that alone had been weird enough for him to punch and kick his way up to the entrance, profanities spilling from his mustached mouth every time somebody’s elbow digged into his ribcage, inducing him to hit back so to stand his ground, only to eventually find himself powerless in front of that ghastly scene. It took him a while to recover from the shock, yet the eldest Shelby eventually regained control of his limbs and moved towards your shape with a single step.

“Polly! Pol, come here, for God’s sake!” Those hoarse yells filled the room, reverberating through the brickwalls, so loud that they could’ve been heard from the other side of the city, Arthur fell on his knees right beside you, gently placing a hand under your nape in order to lift your head. Blind panic streaming in his veins kept him for thinking clearly, he didn’t know what to do, thus he simply shook you from your shoulders, hoping in vain to see your eyes fly back open, but your neck just bent backwards.

“Where the hell is that bloody woman when I need her?!” he grunted those words in between his teeth while tigthening his grip on you, then his chest raised in a sharp move: “Jesus Christ, Polly!” He shouted once more, this time conveying all of his breath and blood towards his larynx, his abrasive voice shriveled and insisted on the last letters of his aunt’s name, until swift strides frantically hit the creaking steps, announcing Polly’s arrive. Her eyes struggled to remain open, her left palm was pressed against her forehead in a silly attempt to soothe the tremendous headache resulted from the previous night’s booze, she didn’t even have the time to put proper clothing on, since her mad niece was apparentely going berserk. “You, son of a bastard-” cursed words died underneath her tongue when she understood what was going on, soon her feet took on a life of their own, as they picked up their peace, leading her next to your body now held in Arthur’s arms.

“She’s freezing, Pol, she’s a fucking chunk of ice!” Hiccoughs shattered his worried cries, he almost whined, shifting his gaze from yours to Polly’s face over and over again, she, on the other hand, used the whole lenght of her right arm to clear in one smooth motion the closest desk. “Quick, lay her here” The deafening noise produced by those items colliding with the pavement barely grazed her hears, whilst she nodded to herself in the effort to impose some order on her obfuscated head, searching for a prompt solution that was late in coming, to the point that Finn beat it to the draw and stormed in, pointing a loaded gun to each corner of the room with fear in his cerulean irises. “What the hell’s going on?” That hysterical question echoed through the place, even though the young boy was finding it hard to get his breath, due to the crazy run he had made to reach the shop immediately after hearing that insane screaming. Nonetheless, in the space of an instant, he saw you as well and fell utterly silent, violent dismay caught him off guard, his wide eyes hesitated on your motionless figure; all of a sudden he didn’t know what to think, nor he could get the thought of your death out of his brains.

“My God, she’s as pale as death” Finn let his mind talk through that throttled murmur, regretting it right away, for silty goosebumps crawled on his skin under the pungent pressure of his brother’s instantaneous lethal glare. “Don’t talk shit, kid! Just fucking go and get Tom!”

The redhead didn’t waste any time, he somehow managed to recollect his guts and steadily disappeared behind the door previously left open. While struggling for air and internally searching for the right words to say in front of Thomas, Finn covered the whole distance between the office and the Garrison. Labored gasps coming out of his slightly parted lips in louder groans as he slammed the heavy pub’s doors open, using only his strongest shoulder; both Harry and Isaiah watched him run towards the back room where Tommy was going through the books, they did not dare spill a word and, after all, the boy didn’t even look in their direction, such was his concentration. Still, once he reached the place, all of a sudden his tongue felt dry, his well-organised speech faded away.

“Finn?! What’s wrong?” Tom’s icy eyes were now staring at him through his round glasses, the paper he’d been reading was instantly dropped, although his tone remained steady. “Y-you need to come, now! She... she’s-” A frown formed upon Tommy’s marble face at his little brother’s furious rambling, something wasn’t right, that was crystal clear, yet he wasn’t able to keep up with those hasty and stuttered sentences, so he approached him, putting both his hands on Finn’s shoulders in order to give him a little shove and maybe get some decent information. “Breathe, kid, and tell me what’s going on” That deep, adamant tone somehow sounded scarier than usual roaring inside the boy’s head, hence anxiety definitively won him over, gaining complete control of his mouth too. “It’s Y/n! I don’t fucking know, Tom, s-she looks dead!” All at once, time and space seemed to collapse around him, one single second dilated, covering the space of a whole lifetime beyond his vacant blue irises now fixed on an undetermined spot of the white wall behind Finn’s back. A gruesome, yet familiar sensation raided his petrified body, it felt like having a beast’s fangs gnawing his throat off, lacerating his flesh to the bone, he could sense every little laceration, his chest being plundered, till even his sable heart was eradicated and then mauled. A strangled wheeze barely lived through his plump lips, that being the only sound he uttered, then his black pupils shrinked and immediately twitched, nailing his sibiling’s gaze. Without receiving an order from his brain, his fists violently gripped Finn’s jacket at the height of his biceps, bringing him a span away from his gnashed teeth with a sharp pull. “Where?” He snarled liked a rabid dog, striking, if possible, geater terror in the young man who struggled to spit an almost inaudible “The shop”, before being shoved against the doorframe as Tommy dodged him and rushed out.

~ ~ ~

Polly held the bottle of her almond parfume she’d just put under your nostrils as if her life depended on it, Arthur’s rough palm, instead, began to pat your pasty cheek. “C’mon, love, wake up! Don’t play games, c’mon!” The dorsum of that same hand now poking the left side of your face, and then going back to the other, at incredible speed. You started to feel your face again when his nudges grew in intensity, until he was practically slapping you; soon a tremendous metallic taste invaded your mouth, or rather, you finally sensed it, whilst your eyelids battled against gravity to get back up. Arthur noticed it, he detected that brief flinch and it felt like being pampered with a fresh breeze after days of unsustainable heat. “Oh, fuck, I think I’m having a stroke” His tone held extreme urgency as he grasped for air, tugging with two fingers at his shirt collar; sure, he was great at knocking people off, maybe the best, yet, unfortunately, after that he’d never tried to bring somenody back with the living.

Blinding light rended your shrouded eyes, everything appeared blurred to the point that you couldn’t distinguish Polly’s features, although she was right beside you; nor your hearing was working, since the loud thud produced by the wooden door hitting the brickwall, and then your name barked by your fiancée’s coarse voice, sounded muffled to your ears. With a superhuman effort you succeeded in tilting your face towards the entrance, you recognized the navy-blue suit Thomas had chosen to wear earlier in the moring, still those nebulous images reached your brains with extreme delay, it was like watching vague movie scenes stream in slow motion. Your eyelids blinked as if a plumbeous burden was anchored to them, each flutter seemed to last a full minute, so that you perceived Tom coming to you in multiple shattered motions, while he kept calling you. The moment Tommy furiously jostled against Arthur, in order to take his place by the desk, you gradually went back to see and hear clearly, now being able to seize pure dread sailing those mesmerizing ocean eyes. “Thank goodness, y/n” His big palms envelopped both your cheeks, slightly squeezing them as he lift your neck, revealing all of his hidden delicacy that you, and you only, were able to bring out. “Y/n, love, talk to me” That order came out like a prayer, his voice betraying him once too often, his fingers shaking with worry, while one of his hands held your chin and the other went to caress your locks. Those loving strokes brushed against your skin, slowly infusing a little warmth into your gelid body, he touched you with the unbearable fear of watching you pass away in between his arms, having him struggle to breathe properly. “Do you hear me?” a single, salty drop fell from his long eyelashes and poured your lower lip, you heard his voice crack, distorting, until it became nothing more than a faint whine: “Please, love, talk to me” When his forehead pressed against yours, he finally gave in to the tears that had been held back with drastic ostination, shutting his eyes for a few instants he allowed brutal sobs to trounce his already aching chest. However, that moment of raw weakness was soon restrained, so that you returned to stare into his blue irises. Then, a small grin crossed your pale mouth and, even though your throat felt like gasoline on fire, preventing you from pronouncing a single syllable, you managed to guide your tiny hand to cup his sharp cheekbone. A burning kiss was pressed on its dorsum, before Tommy completely leant into your touch, giving you a look halfway between relief and disperation, he covered your hand with his own, holding it tight. “You’re okay, you’re safe” Those soft murmurs escaped his lips, probably aimed to placate the axphyziating terror still intoxicating his veins. Indeed, as hard as it was to conceive for everybody in that room, although you were the one just recovering from a sudden collapse, Tommy was now the one trembling like a fallen leaf, his arms rested on each side of your shape, sustaining his weight, as he barely stood on his own two feet. Slowly, you regained the necessary strenght to lift your bust, leading him to flutter in your direction, promptly enlacing his forearms around your waist in order to support your movements. “Hold onto me, darling, take it slow” His raspy voice was still unsteady and full of concern, he was holding his breath out of fear, gazing at you with wide eyes and tightening the grip on your hips as if to make sure that you wouldn’t vanish in his palms. You, on the other hand, gave him a rassuring smile, caressing his face mutliple times and placing a brief kiss on his mouth. “I’m fine, Tommy, I’m here with you” you eventually spoke close to his ear so to keep that conversation between the two of you “Let go, my love, I’m here” Your lips accidentally brushed against his forehead once he listened to you and abandoned himself to your tender embrace, gradually drowning into your soft chest while his arms clung on to your figure, his fingertips almost piercing the thick material of your dress as your cheek covered his head, totally annihilating the distance. “Don’t you ever do that to me again. Never again”.

tag list: @spidey-pal, @shadow-of-wonder, @stassaurus, @peachlle, @livvtheangel, @myjbphase, @namelesslosers, @crazyonesarethebest, @vxxn128, @keithseabrook27, @spaghettirogers, @writingstudent, @hp-hogwartsexpress , @eggingamazinglove, @geeksareunique, @cailoleaf, @simonsbluee , @hereforsmutandfluff, @starxtt, @jenepleurepasbaby, @staygold-bebold, @marvelschriss, @captivatedbycillianmurphy

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mittensmorgul · 2 years

Note

Heeyy!

You’re like my “fandom veteran” :) and I wanted to ask you something:

I’m sure, there was a looot of speculation about Cas’ empty deal while it was hanging over there, but I couldn’t really find specific speculations…

So, do you feel like writing a bit about what the theories were, how you thought that the deal was going to be triggered, (if at all?) and general thoughts?

As I was watching, (binge-watching without much knowledge on the history, BUT knowing that “Destiel was gonna be canon”) I thought that they might trigger the deal by Dean confessing his love or something, but then I thought, they couldn’t be that evil, right??

Also, I thought that there would be a lot of fics with that idea, but I couldn’t find a single one! Are the fic writers just not that evil (to Dean :)) or is this not an idea that was widely spread?

I would love to hear your thoughts! :)

LOL! Hi, and thanks! I've spent the last few hours going through my tag for the episode, and honestly immediate post episode reaction (from my liveblogging notes) was that this could be leading to endgame human!Cas, because having made the deal with the Empty for JACK'S life

i.e., his CHILD, the same way so many people in SPN have sacrificed themselves for their child over the years, starting with John in 2.01 and Dean in 2.22 (because yeah that was the parallel, him carrying on John's Mission assigned to him to Save Sammy), as opposed to for DEAN

it was handing agency over his destiny back to Cas, which could eventually make the choice of relinquishing his grace to become human something tied to true personal choice, and not tied to "because he wanted a ~human~ relationship with Dean"

(under a cut because lol so long)

This was hinted at several times in surrounding episodes, as well, where Cas didn't hesitate to offer his own grace to save Jack's life-- literally in the previous episode 14.07:

Rowena: It's as I suspected. A Nephilim, for all its power, is an unnatural presence. Part human, part angel. It doesn't quite fit. It's delicate. Its grace is what holds it in balance, and when Jack's grace was taken from him, his being fell into chaos. The -- the cells are gobbling each other up. Castiel: Well, if it's grace he needs, he can have mine. Rowena: No, dear, it won't do. Jack is part archangel. He needs a much stronger force and probably some kind of magic, and he needs it quick.

No hesitation AT ALL to give up his grace here if it meant Jack would live. So we were already primed to see his deal in the very next episode being directly tied to that urge. Not to mention Amara's s15 arc as a parallel, of her urging Chuck to actually observe and learn to appreciate his own creation on its level, rather than his constant attempt to control it and force it to his will.

(which, in the end, her being resigned to let Chuck effectively absorb her into his own power, overriding her own love and appreciation for creation in favor of bending to his will three episodes before the series finale only ADDED to my personal feeling that yes, Cas's choice would come down to "his happiness is tied to his own humanity, rejecting his grace as a symbol of Chuck's will, since it had been used to control him since he was created with it for the singular purpose of being an instrument of Chuck's will in the world.")

At the time 14.08 aired, I know loads of us thought at least PART of that happiness would be tied to Dean, but I personally had hoped that it would be about CAS first and foremost. I didn't want his ultimate sacrifice and the choice of humanity to only be motivated by his love for Dean, you know? Dean didn't need that feeling of guilt for Cas choosing humanity *only because of him* and it's felt for YEARS to me that Cas had been slowly learning and understanding that he *would want humanity* for himself at the end of the series.

So that's how I *personally* saw it, and what I *personally* hoped would come of it in the end, but yes... loads of folks thought the true happiness could only be a love confession of some sort for Dean or from Dean. When Dean's confession in 15.09 happened, and Cas stopped him from saying anything else, it was like a hammer between the eyes that holy shit, Dean was about to confess love and that likely would've triggered the Empty deal, and *that was literally the only reason Cas could've had for stopping Dean from saying anything else at that moment.*

It was... mindblowing, honestly, and yet still fit in with everything else I said up there ^^, but if we were supposedly getting a "happy-ish" at least ending of the series, it meant at the very least Cas would need to survive the series IN SOME WAY. It was terrifying to hope for, and thinking back to it from post-finale, also HORRIFYING in retrospect, since we did not get that ending...

*grumbles for five minutes and then goes back to combing through my tag*

(here have some coda fic written in the day or so after 14.08 aired, since this concept was used A LOT after this episode aired, but not necessarily as specific coda fic to this episode... https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/tagged/spn%2014.08%20coda%20fic )

Because if the end of 14.08, with the four of them sitting around the kitchen table with burgers (and even Cas had one!) it felt like if this wasn't the setup for this being a happy family engaged in happy human family wasn't enough to trigger Cas's deal on the spot, then *there was still something missing from what Cas would consider "letting himself be truly happy."*

What could that missing element be? This was a HUGE win! He'd saved his child! He had secured his place in the family with Sam and Dean, too (which he would desperately struggle to maintain, leading to the troubles by the end of s14, and his falling out with Dean in early s15... but all of that was precipitated by Chuck's manipulations... blah blah blah... Cas rejecting "fate" and Chuck's will while Dean had a crisis of questioning whether he'd ever made any of his own choices at all... they were very clearly setting their relationship up as one of the core elements of their character arcs for s15-- and what they would CHOOSE for themselves. But as long as Cas's deal with the Empty hung over them, he couldn't make that choice. Tying all of Cas's character arc to that Moment of Choice when the deal was triggered.

I still never thought they would make it *about his love for Dean,* at least not in plain text on the surface level. I assumed they'd leave that part of it in the subtext after doing so much work in s15 to put it there, and ultimately make it about Cas's choice to choose a happiness that would automatically render his deal null, sacrificing his grace in fulfillment of the deal while remaining alive, human, and happy on earth... lol what the hell did I know.

The Empty had been a DEPRESSION METAPHOR for Cas, though. So making the deal about him choosing HIMSELF, and his own HAPPINESS over this "destiny" to be eternally depressed, seemed to be where the show was heading. All that remained would be for him to do the work of accepting "I am worthy as myself" and the choices tied to that.

but pretty much everyone was muttering and/or yelling about the possibility almost immediately... this is just me going through my tag in chronological order pulling out random pain to throw at you...

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180880541470/umm-lets-not-miss-the-bigger-picture-here-that

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180894193605

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180898487575/random-thought-mittensmorgul-heck-what-if-cas-is

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180899636270/simple-happiness-and-14x8

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180900332265/michael-kills-cas-empty-i-said-when-you-are

https://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/180890226793/14x08-watching-notes-this-episode-is-the-worst-i

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180905751360/postmodernmulticoloredcloak-formidablepassion

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180909975635/byzantium-14x08

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180927140860/thoughts-about-spn-14x08

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180938021165/i-havent-seen-anyone-else-mention-this-but-when

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180957708550/deans-gonna-be-so-upset-when-he-finds-out-about

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180963086550/flyingfish1-bluestar86-you-were-asking-for

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180963360800/naruhearts-x-dean-if-he-needs-his-space-were

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/180963973050/tinkdw-margarittet-11x19-vs-14x08-director

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/181016502905/okay-sooooooo-wait-i-think-the-empty-played

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/181018647985/im-watching-609-and-this-exchange-sam-yeah

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/181021666570/hello-i-was-wondering-is-cas-for-now

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/181054387920/so-the-empty-wants-cas-to-suffer-right-and-then

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/181084354750/ive-seen-only-the-first-two-episodes-of-the

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/181234880040/14x08-cas-and-his-shadow

at this point I'm basically linking half my tag here lol... but yeah, at the time this episode aired, we largely were looking at this through the lens of what it would mean for Cas as a character first, and what it would mean for his relationship with Dean second. But we were also not expecting the show to just ~not bring it up at all~ for the most part until the very end of the series. We were also deeply traumatized by the previous decade of canon, and while we all recognized the destiel of it all, and while we avidly pointed it out at every opportunity and discussed what it would mean regardless of how explicitly it was portrayed in canon versus being heavily implied in the subtext, etc., we didn't realistically expect textual canon confirmation of romantic love between Dean and Cas, you know? So in meta, we were optimistic, hopeful, but also realistic knowing how canon was.

https://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/182034936705/the-empty-says-hell-come-for-cas-when-hes-happy

That said, YES, there is TONS of fic written about it... Writers in this fandom are *absolutely* that evil lol! Sadly I don't have a specific tag where I filed fic with this specific theme, but there is an awful lot of it...

I wrote one... https://archiveofourown.org/works/17481536

but you might want to search AO3 for fics tagged with The Shadow as a character and destiel as the ship... I found 630 fics and at least some of them will likely fit the bill for you! Yes a lot of these are post 15.18, too, but here have the sort order by date posted. The first page of these results are from pre-14.08. Coda fic and Cas's Deal begins at the top of page two of this search. :)

(eta: this fic link that for some reason tumblr ate when I posted, and i only just noticed it hours later. This is the “sorted by date” version, the top of page 2 is fic posted after 14.08 aired)

#spn 14.08 #spn 15.18 #destiel #the scheherazade of supernatural

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hetaestoniahq · 3 years

Note

Haha alright, if you're up to another one maybe PolEst again with "You stayed?" or, if you want to write another ship instead, maybe EstLiet for the same prompt c:

OOoooo we need more PolEst/EstPol in the world sooooooo-

Prompt from this list, open to ask!

What really interests me about this ship is just the whole religious divide of it, I just began reading a book about Estonian mythology and even there was stated that Catholicism was never able to shake the paganism. I haven't found any info about the Polish-Lithuania era trying to do anything different to more try and get Estonians to truly become converted, so it's a interesting dynamic to explore sure that Poland and Lithuania wouldn't have maybe been as rough on him as the Teutonic Order and Livonia were.

______Tw implied religious trauma______

It was the nightless eve of Midsummer, when Dawn and Dusk get to touch without the seperation of the nightly sky.

War had been over for a few years already, but the wounds still ached, the concequences were still going to affect him for a long time.

Estonia was on his own right by a slowly dying bonfire, he had managed to convince Latvia - but also Lithuania, to spend a bit of time together on Midsummer eve. How did he manage to get Lithuania of all people who is meant to be a ruler of his to join in? Simple, he's become familiar with the brunette's personality, and a bit of reminding of the pagan days and just 'Harmless fun, besides someone should probably keep an eye on us don't you think?' managed to get the Lithuanian to hear him out and join him.

Although, at one point Poland did find them, but thankfully he was able to get Lithuania to convince the Pole they're just having a nice bonfire night. Also tell the Pole to just leave them be. Is he using and taking advantage of how easy it's to persuade Lithuania? Maybe a little, and he does feel a bit guilty about it, but he really didn't want the eve to get ruined by that heavily Catholic blonde that doesn’t seem to shut up.

After that he, Lithuania and Latvia all got to talk, almost like equals, which was still a new experience for Estonia, something he had only gotten to get a little bit from Sweden, but still not much. Soon enough though Latvia became tired, and so it was decided to go in for the night, but Estonia had requested to get to have time for himself, and miraculously, Lithuania seemed to trust him to not cause trouble.

Would recommend not to put so much faith in me like that, Leedu. He couldn't help but think to himself, but he was still absolutely going to cherish the time alone. He's gonna use this to be able to relax even a bit for a little before Livonia is gonna come over to punish him for it, like they always do.

Ugh, even when dissolved they still have power over me and Latvia, why can't Poland and Lithuania stop them? He can't believe he's the underling of an underling, how many times lower can that end up going? At least with Sweden he gets a break from Livonia, but he also feels a bit guilty about it because it means leaving Latvia alone with them. Lithuania did intervene when a fight had started between him and Livonia, but will he stop Livonia from punishing or humiliating Latvia when Estonia isn’t there? He doesn't want to have doubts, but he has. Why does life have to be so difficult?

"So like, how long are you gonna be all alone here in silence?" Estonia immediately sprung up from his seated position, turning around and quickly grabbing a nearby stick ready to have fire added to it if needed.

"WoaH woah calm down I'm not here to stab you or anything!" The Pole subtly rose his hands up to indicate he is not armed, Estonia still remained tense, even if he knows by now the Pole likely wouldn't at least, hasn't yet, raise a hand on him, it didn't mean he trusts him.

"What are you doing here?" Estonia suspected the Pole was maybe coming to call him back to the house.

"Well, I was waiting for this bonfire night to get finished up or something." Poland responded as he calmly approached, looking over at the fire that was set up safely to not cause any wildfires.

"You stayed?" Estonia asked rather surprised, raising a brow as he only then properly threw the stick into the fire. Did he really just wait around here somewhere or did he come back only now? He's gonna guess the latter, choosing to come after Estonia didn't go in with the two Balts.

"Well of course I did, I wanted in on this too!"

You? In on this?? Estonia didn't want to believe it. Before he understood if he wanted to tag along with the rest of the group but now it was just Estonia, why would he want to be here alone with him?

"So, tell me about what this whole thing is about." The Pole plopped down next to him, too close, making Estonia shift away to have distance. He wants to hear about his pagan traditions? Clearly the Pole hadn't fallen for the idea that it's just some bonfire night.

It has to be a trick! He is trying to find the roots to pull out. He was distrustful, many before Poland have tried to pull him away from the beliefs close to his heart, make him bow down to their one single mighty god, who in his perceptive, seems like quite the selfish and self-centred god at that, having people do their dirty work. Calling sin upon those who commit bloodshed but not punishing the ones who do it to spread the belief of him. Punish those innocents who simply don't want to put their faith in him.

I'd rather die than bow to a tyrant god like that. Estonia thought coldly, he swore he could feel the scar that runs from his shoulder to his chest, dangerously close to the heart, scorch with brief pain. It's been centuries but it feels like he can still feel the sword that had cut into it. All because some religious folk couldn't accept a no.

"Why would you want to know?" Estonia spoke with a bit of sharpness in his tone, he wanted Poland to be aware that he isn't going to fall for any of his attempts to get him to turn over.

"To know you better?" Poland simply said, giving a small shrug.

Lies, why would you wanna know anything about your peasant? Estonia kept being in denial. Even so, Estonia sees himself as stubborn, no matter what Poland may try he is not going to move over to actually liking their Catholic religion, so he chose to just tell him.

"Well, for starters, every Midsummer Eve people gather around to light a bonfire and spend time together..."

Poland would proceed to actually be quiet and listen for the rest of the night, only occasionally asking a few questions.

|| Alrighty I hope this good -TwT ||

#hetalia #hws estonia #aph estonia #historical hetalia #hws poland #aph poland #EstPol #PolEst

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gondowan · 3 years

Text

Over Your Shoulder

Pairing: Paz Viszla/F!Reader

The Armstech and Paz have a fun night.

Word Count: 3,680 (holy fuck lmao)

Tags/Warnings: 18+ only, Good Communication Is My Kink, daddy/sir kink, and other sexy consensual shenanigans. This one is all smut just fyi.

Notes: Ch 1 Here! Happy first Monday of 2021 folks.

Chapter 2: Can I Get A Bird's Eye View?

“Would you care to find out?”

If you had asked Paz Viszla what he would be doing that day, making a move on the (charming) armstech would not be on the list. He had originally come back to Nevarro on a tip and to see what was left of the Covert, and what could be moved to the new location. He hadn’t planned to stay for too long, but the Bothan’s annoying non-description of who had the datapad stretched Paz’s stay from three days to two weeks. He wasn’t exactly a tracker, that was always a task better suited for someone such as Djarin.

After gently persuading the local dockmaster for a list of new arrivals to Nevarro, he had worked down the list to arrive at the new Guild armstech. She had just arrived a week ago from Bothanui, and set up shop next to the cantina at Greef Karga’s request. Unfortunately, Paz didn’t quite have the luxury of just walking into her workshop. For one, it was constantly busy; day in and day out the woman saw a steady stream of clients, all heavily armed and odds were at least two of them would not be happy to see a Mandalorian. Secondly, he had managed to stay out of the New Republic and the Guild’s radar long enough, and he vastly preferred keeping it that way. Blue beskar and gattling gun(s) were not exactly conducive to blending in with crowds. So, the next logical step of course was to break in quietly, hope he didn’t cause a scene, and leave Nevarro.

Except it didn’t quite pan out that way. Paz had managed to disable the apartment’s security system (not an easy task, this woman was clearly no amateur, he was quite impressed) but she had come back a bit earlier than he expected.

Fuck.

The first thing he saw was her blaster, safety off and pointed directly at him. “What do you want?” she asked. For someone coming face to face with an intruder, she didn’t appear nervous at all-- that probably had to do with her skill not just in weapons repair but weapons writ large. He also saw her giving him a twice-over, gaze lingering on his body, how curious.

Paz cut straight to the chase, hoping to avoid making a scene “The datapad,”.

The woman relaxed and rummaged through her toolkit before walking right up to his face. That was new. Most people, even ones who might call Paz a friend, chose to keep their distance. Either this armstech had nerves of steel or he was losing his touch. “You might want to get this blaster checked,” she motioned at his thighs, “Those scorch marks are usually a bad sign,”. Her gaze lingered briefly and Paz was grateful for his helmet and armor for concealing his expression.

Paz took the datapad, verified its contents, and turned to leave. “Thank you for this,”.

“Ah, so you do have manners,” she teased, voice bright before she shut the door.

What a strange being.

Against his better judgement, Paz showed up the next night. And subsequent nights after that. It was for his own good, he justified to himself, with the Armorer out of reach for the time being, his arsenal did need a good onceover. The other part of him just really wanted to get to know this woman better. She was definitely good at her craft, and carried herself with a general air of confidence, standing up to idiots who wanted to underpay or worse, tried to flirt with her for discounts. She was a by the books type of person, and was polite with clients, but kept to herself despite invitations for a drink from cocky guild members.

She had also taken to calling him Blue, which amused Paz greatly.

“Uh...would you like to stay for dinner?” she asked, eyes flickering briefly at him before returning to the gattling gun on his table. He could tell that she was trying to keep her voice casual, but her shoulders were tense.

Paz really wanted to, but blast, the Creed. “I can’t..but not for the reason you think. I can’t remove my helmet in the presence of others...it’s part of being a Mandalorian”.

He could see the disappointment manifest in your body, and the knowledge that he was the one to do that to you disturbed him greatly.

“Don’t you ever get lonely?”

That was not the follow up question Paz was expecting. Truth be told, he was. The Covert had scattered, and the people he loved were either dead in the ground, missing, or far away. Maybe that was part of what drew him to this particular woman. Something consistent to look forward to, even if it was only for the past week or so. There was also the matter of the bantha in the room-- the rising tension demarcated as of late by light touches on her wrist or at the shell of her ear followed by cheeks flushing red. Paz wondered if she flushed red elsewhere as well.

“Would you care to find out?”

It felt like the air was sucked out of your tiny apartment. You could hear the blood pounding in your heart, ears ringing as you came to grips with the situation. Was he asking what you thought he was asking?

As if he could see the gears turning in your mind, the Mandalorian chuckled, thumb running across your bottom lip “A simple yes or no will suffice. I won’t take what isn’t freely given,”.

You wondered what it would be like to bite his glove off. What his hands would feel like. Yours were callused from years of mechanical work

“Yes.” you whispered, leaving a gentle kiss on his finger.

He leaned closer, helmet grazing the side of your cheek as the vocoder crackled, “That was the response I was hoping for,”. He turned you around with a gentle push of his arm, “Let me take you to bed.”

This was actually happening. You took his hand, looking for an anchor as you led him to your room. As soon as you were there, the brief bravado you had summoned earlier started to dissipate. You settled for helping him take off his bulky armor, pauldrons, greaves, and cuirass forming a neat pile by your bed, until he was left in his helmet and sinfully tight undershirt and pants. It was then that you realized that while the armor added a lot to his frame, he was just big to begin with, easily dwarfing you.

Maker, you didn’t even know his name. You had barely met. Was this really happening? Yes, you had wanted him but was this too soon? Were you being too forward?

“Stop thinking,” he growled, breaking you out of your reverie. He took your hands in his, laying gentle kisses over your knuckles, a kind gesture probably to try to assuage your fears. A thoughtful gesture from someone who lived and breathed war. He helps you out of your top, carefully peeling it off of you, making appreciative noises as you become more and more exposed. Your pants come off next, and inwardly you wish you had the foresight to wear something nicer than what you had on, but that feeling washes away when his fingers dip just inside the waistband of your underwear, teasing.

“Do you trust me?” he whispered, right hand coming up to cup your face in a reassuring gesture. “I’m safe just so you know, I got my implant checked recently,”. You echo his statement, inwardly thanking yourself for keeping up to date with your health.

He held your discarded scarf in the other, “If I cover your eyes I can--”

You closed your eyes, already anticipating his ask. No turning back now, you were all in. You heard him take a sharp intake of breath before carefully wrapping the scarf around your eyes. It was...nice. Without the gift of sight you couldn’t worry about how you looked or what to do. Paradoxically, you felt a little freer than you ever had. You heard of the clunk of the helmet being placed on the ground, and then, his lips were pressing on yours.

Softly at first, an almost chaste movement, as if he were gauging your response, trying to make sure he wasn’t overstepping. It was sweet, but you didn’t come this far for that. You wrapped your arms around him, deepening the kiss, mouth opening to try to convey your desires. It had been a while, you were going to make the most out of this, however fleeting it may be.

You could feel him smiling a little against your mouth and empowered by your kiss, he moved his hands down, thumbs caressing your throat, enjoying the way your breath hitched. He slowly mapped your body, making you giggle when his stubble cheek grazed your collarbones. Down and back up your arms, laying kisses down your sternum and your stomach, and the back up your legs. Carefully and methodically.

You could feel yourself getting wetter, and tried to squeeze your thighs for some friction, anything to help with the pressure. He laughed as he held your thighs apart, “No, not yet,”.

“Blue I…,” you squirmed, fidgeting against his hold.

His voice piped up from between your legs, “It’s Paz.”

You blinked under the blindfold. “What?”.

“My name is Paz Viszla,” he murmured, tongue licking a strip up your inner thigh. You shivered.

Ohhh. “Paz…” you murmured, trying out his name on your tongue, “Paz.”

Paz’s mouth trailed upwards towards your center. “Careful sweetheart, gonna give me ideas with the way you call my name,”. His hands slid back up your torso tracing a line right along the underside of your breasts while his lips continued to ghost around your inner thighs. You could almost feel his breath on your clit, and your attempts to grind onto something are met with empty air.

You whined, desperate for more sensation, “Hurry up, I haven’t got all night” you huffed. This was supposed to be a quick fuck. You were used to quick one night stands with random fly guys, all rushed and without much pomp and circumstance. This pace was killing you, albeit in a good way.

You were rewarded with a slight pinch to your nipples, and your body arched, chasing the crumb of sensation. Paz continued to work your nipples, alternating between rubbing them with the soft pads of your fingers and pinching them. Hazily, you thought about asking him to pull.

“So sensitive,” he murmured as if he was describing the weather and not as if he was torturing you by sucking a bruise right at the valley where your torso meets your leg.

You pout, the thought of saying please at ready on your tongue. Anything for more.

“Impatient aren’t you? Too used to having it your way? That’ll be something to work on next time,”

As much as you were loath to admit it, the admission of “next time” filled you with a funny sensation. Maybe, just maybe, this wouldn’t be just a one time thing. But now was not the time to interrogate that. You jerk your head down at his general direction, “Paz, I swear to whoever if you don’t touch me---”

“I am touching you sweetheart. This is called foreplay,”

“I should’ve shot you that night you broke in.” you retort, pretending to be exasperated. You had fantasized about what it would be like to fuck the man underneath the blue beskar, but slow and teasing were not in your assumptions. If he wasn’t doing such sublime things to your nipples, you might actually kill him, you think. You can feel Paz finally lifting his head from your thighs, hands continuing their torture of your chest. He presses kisses on the underside of your jaw and on your neck, clearly enjoying the way you fuss around to look for more.

You want something, anything more than what he’s giving you. “It’s not my first time you know, I don’t need---”.

“Oh I know, but this is your first time with me,” and with that he finally palms your crotch, finally giving you some sweet pressure at your center. He slips a finger in between your folds, drawing circles around your clit with the back of his knuckle. Fuck, that’s nice.

“Remember to breathe,” Paz says, a smug tone evident against the crook of your neck. Two can play at this game, you decide, moving your arm up, aiming blindly for his crotch. Paz quickly side steps you with a swiftness that belies his frame and he swats at your thigh, causing you to yelp.

“Nice try but...let me take care of you. Will you let me hmm? I can make it so good for you,” he murmurs, one hand continuing to rub your clit, the other massaging the spot he had hit on your leg, his tone making the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.

That exact sequence of words tickles something in the back of your mind. A desire to be soft, pliant, and obedient for this beautiful and dangerous man. To hand over the reigns of your pleasure to him. You sigh, and let down your guard.

Paz can feel the exact moment you decide to stop fighting him. He wasn’t expecting all of this so soon, and it was definitely something that they’d have to discuss later to set limits and boundaries, but fuck if it wasn’t sexy to see this beautiful woman allow him to pleasure her in the way that he wanted. He had long nourished a desire to be a caretaker in one way or another, but the life of a Mandalorian was not exactly conducive to relationships built on so many layers of trust and understanding. The possibility of you made his head spin a little.

Paz thinks about what it would be like to ruin you, this beautiful and talented specimen. He doesn’t even register how hard he is and how uncomfortable his pants are as he drinks in the sight of you laid out on the bed in front of him, nipples hard, pussy wet, mouth open, wanting, wanting him. Paz wasn’t quite sure what possessed him to move immediately to blindfolds and taking his helmet off (he’s done that all of once in his adult life), but he knew he would absolutely regret it if he didn’t get to kiss and taste you before the night was over. He goes back on his knees in front of you.

You can feel his breath on your clit again and his finger tracing your entrance and you make a noise in anticipation.

“There we go. Just relax, fuck, gonna make this so good for you,” he whispers, slowly inserting his finger into your pussy. You’re so wet that it slips in easily, and Paz moves his finger in and out, exploring you. It’s nice to have something for you to hold on to, but it’s not quite enough.

As if he can read your mind, you feel a second finger at your entrance and right as Paz slips it in, you also feel his tongue on your clit. You blindly reach over, feeling his short hair under your hand, nails digging into his scalp right as he puts his mouth over you and sucks.

Paz lets out an appreciative hum as he works your pussy with his fingers and your clit with his mouth. His tongue works broad flat movements up and down your sensitive bundle of nerves while his fingers methodically push and pull at your center. You bite your lip as the sensations intensify, pulling at Paz’s hair as he continues his precise movements.

“Please Paz— I’m gonna-,”

“Ah, so you do have manners,” he chuckles, his voice muffled by your thighs. Faintly, you register that you had said that to him the first night he broke in, that jerk. You have no idea how he manages to stay so infuriatingly calm while he breaks you down. Your mind scrambles to keep a hold of your dignity. “Unnh--- if you keep this up Viszla, I might--ah fuck- I might have to keep you around”, hips gyrating to meet his tongue.

Paz laughed, “Promises promises. I think we’re going to have a lot of fun together, if you continue to play nice,”. His mouth leaves your clit just as you’re approaching your peak and you cry out in frustration. So close. You press back into his fingers, trying to get a hold of just a little more sensation

You hear him hastily pull down his pants and truth be told you had forgotten he was still fully dressed the entire time while you were completely naked, which somehow made this all the more obscene. You can feel the head of his cock at your entrance as he withdraws his fingers.

“Are you ready?”, blunt head of his cock moving up and down your folds.

You whimper and nod, but he doesn’t move.

“I need you to use your words sweetheart. Do you want this?”, soft kisses pressing against your temple.

You turn towards him, searching for his lips and in a brief moment of lucidity, you whisper “I want you Paz”. You can feel the immediate effect of your acquiesce in his sharp intake of breath.

“I’d give you a warning, but I think we’re past that,” he growls. Before you can ask him what he means, Paz thrusts into you with one fluid motion, slick covered fingers intertwined with yours. You gasp at the intrusion, the sensation almost overwhelming. He was much bigger than you anticipated, and the stretch instinctively made you tense up. Paz holds your hand tighter, “It’s ok, just...just relax, let your body adjust to me,”. You can hear the strain in his voice as he fights against the instinct to rut.

As your body adjusts, he slowly pulls out part way before pushing back in, testing your limits. For a brief moment, there were no words, just your breathing as you focused on the sensation of him filling you, the warmth of his chest on yours, all tying into a wonderful feedback loop.

“Talk to me,”.

You only have one thing to say to him.

“Harder,”.

Paz squeezes your hand lightly, acknowledging your request before grabbing your ankles and putting them at his shoulders.

“Remember, you asked for this,” he whispers, a dangerous edge to his voice and you think about just how easily this man could engulf you and shiver. Before you can make a smart remark, he hoists your hands above your head, holding your wrists down with one hand, and fully thrusts into you, bending you in half and hitting impossibly deeper. You couldn’t push back against him even if you wanted to, and Paz sets a brutal rhythm, the push and pull of his hips fills the air with the sound of your bodies hitting together and all you can do is wrap your legs around him and take it.

An endless litany of half-formed phrases, come out of your lips, but each thrust knocks the air out of your lungs, so you settle for holding onto him as he threatens to overwhelm you. Above you, Paz groans as he rolls his hips into you, “I knew you’d be perfect---fuck-- knew it as soon as I saw you that night. Dig those nails into me sweetheart,” he says, releasing your hands, cutting through the haze in your mind and you obey, nails digging in to try to get some purchase on his back. “Fuck yeah that’s it, show me how much you like this,”.

You can feel his rhythm start to falter as he gets close, and you squeeze down on his cock as he pulls out. Paz sputters, “No, not yet, shit--” he says, reaching down again towards your clit, lips pressed onto yours again as he works you up higher and higher, over the edge.

“Please, may I cum please please Paz--” you moan into his mouth. Normally, you would just take what you can get and finish, but something about Paz makes you want to ask, to be granted permission and it’s a dangerous high filling your mind, washing away any sense of shame or guilt because all you can do right now is take what he gives you.

You can’t hear him say yes but rather feel him mouth the words against your cheek and vaguely you can hear him encouraging you as he continues the unrelenting pressure on your clit and inside your pussy. You gasp and the tension inside your body builds and builds, and you let go, letting your orgasm wash over you, arching your back, thankful for the blindfold to hide your eyes rolling back and all you can think about is how full and how good you feel stuffed with his cock inside and his fingers on your nerves.

As you come back to reality you can hear Paz curse, “Where do you want it?” he asks roughly.

You smile, giddy from your release, and in a moment of brilliance, you tell him “ I want it on my face...sir,”.

Paz chokes and his body seizes up at the sound of your words and he barely pulls out in time before spilling all over you, most of it landing on your chest and neck as he finishes on top of you. You preen under him, glad that your words have their desired effect, and your head falls back to catch your breath.

He kisses your ankles, broad hands running up and down your thighs in a soothing gesture as he also tries to regain his breath.

“Caught me off guard there,”

You smile at him, “I can be full of surprises,”.

Paz chuckles as he presses a kiss to your cheek before reaching around for his helmet. Once it’s on, he carefully removes the scarf from your eyes, thumbs brushing over your closed eyelids before pressing your forehead to his.

“I don’t doubt that at all.”

Taglist: @remmysbounty @starlite41

#the mandalorian #paz viszla #paz viszla x reader #paz vizla x reader #no shame in 2021 friends #((((gentle feedback and comments always appreciated))))#over your shoulder fic #mono writes

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talesofarcadia78 · 3 years

Text

Sorceress of Arcadia || Becoming Part 2 (Douxie’s POV)

Summary: Y/n Lake is Jim Lake's older sister. She discovers that she is sorceress and her brother is the Trollhunter. She and the Trollhunters go on adventures together, they save trolls and humans. Along the way, a friend becomes more than just a friend and discovers their secrets.

Warning: None

Word count: 5,587

Tags: @lunariasilver

Previous >> Becoming Part 2 • Next >> Wherefore Art Thou, Trollhunter?

Ring! Ring! Ring!

My phone started ringing, meaning someone was calling me. I reached my hand over to my nightstand and picked the call up. “Hello?” you said. “Douxie! Where are you? You're late for your shift! Get over here!” Mr. Benoit screamed. “Yes sir!” you replied, hanging up. You were so late. You quickly got dressed and ran out of your apartment. On the way out your cat, Archie stopped you in front of the doorway. “Arch! I’m getting late for my shift! Move!” you scolded him. “Douxie, you're forgetting something,” Archie said. “What?” you asked, getting impatient. “Your shoes!” Archie shouted. You looked down at your feet. They were bare. In all the rush, you had forgotten about your shoes. “Thanks, Arch!” you said, hastily putting my shoes on. “Bye,” Archie said. “Bye!” you shouted back, running out.

You ran across town and into Mr. Benoit’s. You scrambled inside the staffroom and got to work. After about 2 hours, up to finished up your last task and got out of the cafe. You checked the time, it was almost time for your shift at the bookstore. You walked over to the bookstore when you spotted y/n sitting outside the museum. You walked over to her, wondering what she was doing in town, since the whole ankle problem yesterday. You noticed she was looking at her phone. She seemed to be a bit worked up over something. “Looks like someone is frustrated,” you commented. She looked up from her phone to face me. Her e/c eyes were so hypnotizing. You could stare into them all day. You snapped out of your thoughts when y/n started talking. “Oh hey, Douxie. I was just researching but didn’t find out what I was looking for,” she told you. “Ah, I see. Well, I see you're in town, so your ankle must be okay. Right?” you asked, concerned for her. “Yeah, it’s better. It still hurts a bit, but I can handle it,” she said, walking over to a nearby bin to throw some foil.

“Well, are you interested in books?” you asked, wanting her to come by the bookstore and spend some time there. “Yeah. Why?” she asked, curious why as to why you suddenly brought up the topic of books. “Well, the bookstore I work in isn’t far, wanna come?” you asked. “Yeah sure,” she replied.

Yes!

The two of you walked to the bookstore, chatting about her life. When you had arrived, you held the door open for her and bowed. “Why you’re very chivalrous,” she said. “Thank you, m’lady,” you joked.

The two of you walked inside. You noticed y/n walk over to a shelf and started skimming through the titles. You went behind the counter and pulled out a book that Master Merlin had written, back when we were in Camelot. She might be interested, so you walked over to her and tapped her shoulder. She spun around and you held out the book. “What about this?” you asked, handing her the book. She read the title and asked, “ Wait, Camelot as in 12th century, medieval times Camelot?” “Yeah, I guess. I don’t know. This book had been here for ages, no one has ever shown any interest in it so far. You’re the first,” you lied. You didn’t want to lie to her, but you had no other choice. If you did not want to reveal your past and get close to her, you had to lie to her. You would tell her eventually but now wasn’t the time. She walked over to a couch and sat down, starting to read it.

You thought of getting something for her, so you walked to the back and got some lemonade out of the fridge. You poured the lemonade into two, glass cups and walked back to the front. “I got lemonade!” You declared, to no one in particular. You saw that y/n jolted up a bit. You must’ve frightened her, but who knows? You went up behind her and handed her a glass. You sat beside her on the couch and looked over her shoulder, wondering if she liked it or not. “Is it good so far?” you asked. “Yeah. It’s interesting to see Merlin’s perspective of Camelot and King Arthur. Plus it’s funny to see the little notes in the margins,” she said, pointing to a note. You had written those notes, wanting to make the book more fun, not just filled with boring facts. So whenever you got a chance, you would write some notes in the margins. It was fun. One time you had gotten caught, resulting in a long lecture from Master Merlin, but after that incident, you never got caught. “Well, I hoped you like it. Want to buy it?” you asked, finishing up your lemonade and putting it on the table in front of you. “Actually yes. How much is it?” she replied, closing the book. “As I said, the book has been lying around for ages, so, it’s on me,” you repeated. “No. You have two jobs and on top of that, you study. You deserve the money,” she denied, getting $15 and handing you the money. You shook my head, shoving the money back into her hand. She looked like she was about to protest when an idea popped into your head. You jumped off the couch.

“What about, you give me the money and in return, I buy you dinner tomorrow,” you suggested. She was quiet for a minute when she replied, “Okay, sounds like a plan”. “Great, it’s a date!” you added. You walked over to the counter and put the money in the cash box. You walked back over to the couch and sat next to her again and started reading with her. You noticed that she had also finished her lemonade and put the glasses away. You looked at the time, 12, meaning it was break time. You walked over to the door and spun the sign from “open” to “on break”. You then walked back over to y/n and sat next to her. Both of you read through the book.

You read the page where Merlin was talking about how Morgana was starting to get the hang of her magic. When you finished reading the page, you wondered why y/n had stopped turning the page. You turned to see her. You realized that she had fallen asleep on my shoulder. You grinned, she looked cute when she was asleep. You bookmarked the page and closed it. You put the book on the table gently, making sure not to wake y/n up, and leaned back into the couch. After a few minutes, your eyelids started to get heavy, and soon enough, you drifted off into sleep, leaning your head on her’s.

It had been about half an hour when you felt someone shaking me gently. You instantly woke up and looked down at y/n and she pointed towards the door to see some people knocking on the door. You sprinted to the door and unlocked it. “Sorry folks! Just drifted off a bit, please come on in,” you apologized to the people and opened the door wider to let people in. “It’s okay lad, We understand if you need to focus some time with your girlfriend,” an old man said, pointing to y/n. “I...uh...um...” you stammered, trying to look for an answer. Sure you had a crush on her, but was it that obvious? “Lad?” the old man waved his hand in front of you, snapping you out of your thoughts. “Yes sir! Please come on in,” you answered, gesturing him to come in.

Y/n walked up to you with the book in her hands. “Well, I have to go. I’ll see you later,” she said and was about to leave when you grabbed her wrist without thinking. I am so stupid! “Wait! How am I going to let you know what time I’ll come to pick you up? Do you have an email or a number...” you asked. Y/n smiled at you and then you exchanged numbers. “Thanks, I’ll text you what time I’ll come,” you said. “Oh and come dressed...nicely,” you added. “Sure, you too. Don’t wear, you know...that,” she joked, gesturing to your outfit. “Cheeky!” you teased. Then she left.

You walked back into the store, helping the people who had come in, but your mind was thinking of y/n. She was so sweet, nice and well... everything! Would she even like a guy like me? She must think I am a popular guy that is a jerk and likes to show off. No, I won’t let that happen. Does she know I have a crush on her? Am I that obvious? you push those thoughts aside and focused on my work.

After your shift ended, you said goodbye to my co-worker and left for your apartment. On the way there, you saw Jack, the keyboardist of your band, heading towards you. “Hey, Jack! What’s up?” you said. “Douxie! You missed band practice! Where were you? Our concert is tomorrow!” Jack said. “Band practice! I forgot about that! I’ll practice tonight and I’ll come extra early to school, so we can all practice, so we don’t embarrass ourselves tomorrow night,” you suggested. Then it hit you. “Sounds good Doux!” Jack agreed. “What about the dinner with y/n!” you said, a little too loudly. “Wait, Douxie! You're going to have dinner with y/n! Dude!” Jack said, surprised. “Yeah. I am so stupid! What am I gonna do Jack?” you asked. “Dude! You're going out for dinner with y/n! She is so popular, well in the classes. I was once in her English class, and she was so helpful like everyone loves her! How did you get to know her? Wait do you like her?” Jack teased. “I...yeah. I do like her,” you said, blushing a bit. “Dude! Your lucky to be going out to dinner with her, but at school, be careful. There is a guy named Tyler that has a huge crush on her. They are both in the same Math and HPE class. She doesn’t know that he even exists, but that guy can go to any lengths to get her liking him,” Jack warns. “But you do know that you are friends with her, so more likely she’ll like you than him,” Jack added. “Okay. But how do you know all of this stuff?” you asked, getting suspicious. “That’s confidential, I can’t tell you,” Jack scoffed. “Okay. Just tell me what I should do about the dinner,” you asked, getting a bit impatient. “Just go out tonight. Then tomorrow, you can ask her to come to the concert,” Jack suggested. “Okay, I’ll do that! Thanks, Jack!” You said, running to my apartment.

On the way to the apartment, you texted y/n: Hey, So, I can’t take you out for dinner tomorrow, something came up. But I am free tonight, are you? She replied: Yeah You immediately replied: Great! I’m coming to pick you up in 20 minutes. Bye. She replied: Okay, bye.

You barged into your apartment, seeing Archie sitting on the couch. “Douxie! You shouldn’t just barge in! Have some manners!” Archie scolded. “This is my home Arch! I can barge in anytime! Plus, I’m in a rush!” you shouted, running into my room and opening up my closet. You looked around your closet, trying to find something good to wear. Then your eyes fell onto a black dress shirt and a pair of black pants. You quickly took it and put it on. You looked at yourself in the mirror. The long sleeves of the shirt were bothering you. Archie walked into the room. “Why are you dressed so nicely? You never dress this nicely. Are you going out somewhere?” Archie asked. “Yes. But these sleeves are so uncomfortable!” you sighed. “Just roll them up,” Archie said. You rolled the sleeves up and it instantly felt better. You then got some black shoes and put them on. “Okay Arch! I’m heading out. I’ll be back around 10,” you said, heading out of the room. “Doux! Wear a bow tie! And do you know where you going?” Archie asked. “Why do I need a bow tie?” you whined. “You’ll look more proper. Here,” Archie replied, handing me a navy blue bow tie. You tied it under your collar, while Archie told me a nice restaurant. “Thanks, Arch! How did you know I was going out for dinner? What if I was going to a fancy party or something?” you asked. “I looked through your texts of you and a girl, y/n. Plus, I know you Doux. I have been with you for almost a millennium,” Archie explained, holding up my phone, with the screen showing my texts with y/n. “Arch! Why did you look through my texts! That’s private!” you scolded him, snatching the phone. “Do you like this y/n girl?” Archie asked. “What! No... She’s just a friend,” you lied. “Douxie, you know you can’t lie to me. I know you like-” Archie said, but you cut him off. “We’ll have this conversation another time. Right now, I’m running late,” you said, grabbing the keys to your Vespa, and heading out.

You quickly rode to y/n’s house, parking the Vespa in front of it. You walked up to the front door and rang the doorbell. You didn’t have to wait long. The door opened, revealing Jim. “Hey, Jim. I was here to pick up your sister. We’re going out for dinner,” you said. “Hey, Douxie. I’ll call her,” Jim replied. You were about to say that you would bring her back by 10, but that’s when Jim shouted out, “Y/n! Douxie is here!” You winced, that was loud. Jim took a step back from the doorway, revealing y/n heading down. Your eyes widened as soon as you saw her. She was beautiful in the black to navy blue gradient dress. It also matched with your outfit, just like a couple. You saw Jim grin at his sister. He must be happy to see his sister happy. “Come back by 10. It’s a school night,” Jim said, sternly, but you heard a bit of amusement in his voice. “I will,” y/n replied. “Shall we?” you asked, offering your arm to y/n. She took it, stepping outside. She then turned, facing Jim. “Have fun sis. Douxie, take care of my sister, she’s the only one I have. She is the only person I can talk to when no one else would understand, even when Toby wouldn’t understand,” Jim said to you. “Don’t worry Jim! She is under great care for the next 2 hours. I promise,” you reassured him.

Y/n waved to Jim as he closed the door. You walked over to your Vespa and sat. “I never knew you had a Vespa,” y/n said. “And I never knew your brother was very protective of you,” you joked. “Well, that’s true. He’s never been so protective before,” y/n said. “Well, let’s leave your brother to the side for now, and sit behind me,” you said, patting the seat behind you.

Y/n sat behind you as you started the vehicle up. Once it was started, you rode very fast. You felt a jolt from y/n, and turned around slightly, only to see that she was about fall. But just in time, you caught her with one of your hands. “No offense, but you need to ride more safely,” y/n commented, as she put her hands around your waist. You felt your face start to heat up. “I’ll get around to it. For now, just enjoy the view,” you said. Just when your face was starting to cool down, you felt y/n put her chin on your shoulder. This time, your face didn’t heat up, you smiled. It was going well so far.

After about 10 minutes, you had reached the restaurant that Archie had said to go to. Y/n got off, while you parked it. After the two of you made your way into the restaurant. “Wow! You chose a nice restaurant,” y/n said. You thanked her, even though the choice was Archie’s, not yours. You’ll just thank him when you go back home. The two of you walked over to a two-seater table and y/n was about to sit down when it hit you. It wouldn’t be chivalrous for you to just let her sit down. So you stopped her and took out the chair for her and she sat. She was about to pull the chair in when you did it for her. Then you took a seat across from her. You grabbed the menu and looked through the various foods. There were soups, salads and then your eyes lit up when you saw pasta. “Do you want pasta?” you asked, looking up from the menu, at y/n. “I don’t mind,” y/n said. “Which one do you want?” you asked, turning the menu so that she can see. You didn’t know what y/n would want, so you just asked her, plus she might be allergic to something that you choose or just not eat certain types of ingredients. Like some people are gluten-free. She looked at the menu and then asked, “Maybe the macadamia pesto pappardelle? Wait you aren’t allergic to nuts, are you?” “Nope! It sounds good. Nice choice,” you said. Then a waiter came over to you and asked what you would like to order. You noticed that you had seen him somewhere, but you couldn’t place your finger on it. You got out of your thoughts and order and he walked away. “I’m sorry if you found my choice of food, well you know,” y/n said. “It’s okay. I’m guessing you are a vegetarian or a vegan?” you said since you knew that they didn’t eat meat, and she had chosen an option that wasn’t popular on the menu. “Yeah, I just don’t like the idea of eating animals,” y/n explained. From that, you and y/n started talking and finding out a lot about each other.

After you had finished dinner, you both went to the front to pay. You took out your card to pay while y/n did the same. “Are you guys splitting the bill, or is one of you going to pay?” the employee asked. “I’m going to pay,” you and y/n replied at the same time. “Y/n, you bought the book, I buy you dinner. That was the deal,” you said. Taking advantage of her pause, you quickly tapped your card on the machine. She sighed and put her card back into her purse. “Let’s go,” you said, heading out of the restaurant while y/n followed behind.

You started the Vespa and y/n sat on. “Ride safely,” y/n said. “Will do,” you replied, and rode off into the night. It was a silent ride, but not awkward, comfortable. You were about to break the silence, but y/n beat you to it. “Uh, Douxie, maybe you want to go a bit more faster,” she said to you, as she showed you the time. It was 9:55, you needed to hurry. You nodded and sped up a little. You were halfway across the bridge when something jumped in front in front of you. You halted the Vespa to a stop. The thing that had jumped in front of you was huge and had red and orange eyes, that was staring at us. A troll, and none other than Bular. He came towards us, scraping the floor with his sword. “What is that?” you whispered, trying to sound like you didn't know what it was. “Two little flesh bags out and about at night, make tasty meals,” Bular said. “I do not want to be a tasty meal,” y/n whispered. “It has been so long since I had a human for dinner,” Bular said. He kept coming forward. “Douxie, what do we do?” y/n whispered to you. You could hear the fear in her voice and you had to protect her, it was a promise that you made to her brother. “We have to distract him,” you whispered back. “How?” she asked. “I didn’t think that far,” you replied.

Instead, you tried to start up the engine, but it didn’t work, no fuel. You wanted to curse your Vespa right now, but there was a more dire problem right now. “We have to run," you said. You got off the Vespa and looked at Bular. You didn’t want him to recognize you right now. If he did then his desire to kill you would increase, since you had fought with him at the Battle of Killahead Bridge, 9 centuries ago. “I’m sorry lad! But you won’t be having dinner tonight!” you shouted at Bular. Bular roared and ran towards us. You grabbed y/n’s hand and said, “Do you trust me?” She nodded. You ran to the edge of the bridge and jumped down, taking y/n down with you. You landed perfectly, but then you heard a groan behind you. You turned to see, what the matter was. You saw that y/n was holding her ankle in pain. “Y/n! Are you alright?” you asked, getting worried. She did a thumbs up to you, smiling. It looked forced she wasn’t fine. Then at the worst times, Bular jumped in front of you. In a flash, you picked up y/n bridal style and ran. “Sorry y/n, the dinner didn’t go as planned,” you apologized. “It’s okay,” y/n said, peeking over your shoulder, probably to check if Bular was following or not.

You kept running until you had reached y/n’s house. You walked up the stairs and saw that the door was slightly opened. You kicked it open, to see that Jim was sitting on the edge of the couch. He jumped up off the couch and ran towards the two of you. “Y/n! What took you so long? I was worried sick!” Jim exclaimed. “I’m fine,” y/n said. “You are not fine. You are literally in Douxie’s arms for a reason,” Jim said. “It’s her ankle,” you said. “What did you do?” Jim asked, glaring at you. “Nothing! We ran into... trouble. Her ankle started to hurt, so yeah,” you explained. Jim nodded. You set y/n down and waved goodbye. From the corner of your eye, you saw that Jim was glaring at you. You quickly got out of their house and headed down the street.

You checked around to see if anyone was around. When you saw no one, you teleported back to your Vespa. You found out that Bular was gone, so you took your Vespa and teleported to your apartment. Once you were back inside your apartment, you kicked your shoes off and jumped onto your bed. Then Archie walked in. “Doux? Are you okay?” Archie asked. “Yeah... nope,” you replied. “What happened?” Archie asked, jumping onto the bed. “The dinner was good, by the way, the restaurant was very nice, but when we were heading back... Bular tried to kill us. In the process of escaping, y/n’s ankle got worse and when I got to her house, Jim looked very mad at me,” you explained. “And on top of that, I broke a promise.” Archie just nodded. “Well, I think that you should just go to bed and hope that tomorrow will be a better day,” Archie suggested. “I can’t, I have to practice my guitar, for tomorrow’s concert,” you said, getting up and walking to your guitar and started practicing.

After about an hour of practice, your eyelids got heavy, so you had no choice to go to bed.

You woke up the next morning, a bit earlier than you usually do, and got dressed. You walked out of your bedroom and into your kitchen. Archies was already up, and he was sitting on top of the counter. “Good morning Doux,” Archie said. “Morning,” you said. “I have made you coffee,” Archie said, handing you a mug of coffee, “Thanks, Arch. Wait how did you make a coffee? Your just a cat!” you asked. “That’s my secret and secrets are not supposed to be told!” Archie scoffed. You rolled your eyes and gulped down the coffee, getting your guitar and bag and heading out.

You rode your way to school. It was quiet at this time. You walked your way to the band room, seeing that all your bandmates were already there. “Hey, guys! Let’s get started on practice,” you said. “Hey Doux! So how was your dinner, with y/n?” Jack asked. “Oh...um...good!” you replied. “Douxie! You had dinner with y/n! Dude, your lucky,” Henry, the drummer, commented. “Did you tell everyone?” you asked Jack. “Not everyone, just the band,” Jack replied. “Uhh!” you moaned, facepalming. “Don’t worry Douxie. We will not tease you,” Jason, the other guitarist, and the singer reassured you, glaring at the others. Jason didn’t like it when someone gets teased, even if it is just friendly teasing. “C’mon Jason! Where’s the fun in that?!” Jack whined. After another round of whining from Jack and Henry, you all started to rehearse.

After about an hour of rehearsal, you packed your stuff up and secretly teleported your guitar back to your apartment, so you didn’t have to carry it after school. All of you walked out of the band room, going to their usual gossip spots or wherever they went before the first period.

Jason walked beside you, since you two, we're in the same class first period. “Hey, didn’t you need to ask y/n out?” Jason asked, elbowing you in the ribs. “Huh? Do you mean to ask her to come to the concert?” you asked. “Yeah,” Jason replied. “Well I haven’t yet, but I will,” you said. “Well, I see her right there!” Jason exclaimed, pointing to y/n, she was walking in the opposite direction. “Go and ask her out, Doux.” “I’m not asking her out, just inviting her,” you hissed at Jason. He just smirked and shoved you towards y/n’s direction. “Hey y/n!” you shouted, running to her. She spun around, while one of her friends whispered something to her. As you got closer, she greeted you, “Hey, Douxie!” “So from yesterday, is your ankle alright?” you asked, starting a normal conversation, waiting for the right moment to ask her. “Yeah. I’m sorry that my brother was so rude yesterday. He was mad at you, for not keeping your promise,” y/n said. “It’s okay. I’m to blame for though, I promised Jim you would be in great care, and I broke that promise,” you admitted, looking down on the ground, feeling ashamed. “It’s okay. It’s not your fault, plus I’m fine now,” y/n reassured you. You shook your head. You were to blame, you had promised that you would take care of her, but you didn’t. You just made her ankle worse. Tears started to form in your eyes, and they dropped to the ground. Y/n up her hand on your shoulder, “Douxie, I’m fine,” y/n said, which made you look up, “See?” She jumped up and down a couple of times to prove her point. “I’m fine,” she repeated, putting her hand back on your shoulder, trying to comfort you. Then, you knew it was time to ask her. You took her hands into yours and looked her in the eyes. “Well can you come to my concert tonight?” you asked. “What time?” she asked. “8:30, at the square,” you replied. “I’ll be there,” she said. “Great!” you grinned and from your excitement, you kissed her cheek, which made her blush a little. You waved goodbye, going the opposite direction, back to Jason. Jason was starring at you, shocked at what he just saw. “You freaking just kissed y/n on the cheek!” Jason exclaimed. He patted you on the back. “It was out of excitement that she said that she’ll come,” you explained. “But why did you invite her half an hour early?” Jason asked. “Well because I want to give her a backstage tour,” you explained. “Okay,” Jason said, then the two of you walked to class.

You were walking over to your bike, to only see a crowd, surrounding someone. You peeked over people’s shoulders and saw that people were crowded around y/n. She looked worried when a girl asked, “Is it true that Douxie kissed you?” Oh, fuzzbuckets! They learned you kissed y/n! You saw a lot more people starting to shoot her questions, she looked like she was going to faint at this point. You pushed through the crowd and grabbed her out of there. She looked up at you. “You alright?” you asked. “Yeah, but my mental state, not so much,” she replied. “People asking too many questions?” you asked, giving her a sympathetic smile. You knew what it was like since so many people asked you questions all day. She nodded. Suddenly, the crowd started surrounded the two of you and started to shoot questions at both of you. “Are you guys dating?” a girl asked. “When did you guys get together?” another asked. For the first time in your life at Arcadia Oaks Academy, you felt insecure answering those questions. Y/n looked up at you, her face full of hope that you would have a plan. You just smiled and took her hand and ran through the crowd, towards the bikes. You both grabbed yours and rides away. When the coast was clear, you stopped. “I don’t know how you do it, managing such a big crowd at school,” she said. “I just do, love,” you said. “Thank you Douxie, for saving me from all those people,” she said. “No problem. You still coming to my concert, right?” you asked, hoping the people didn’t rattle her too much that she wouldn’t come to the concert. She nodded. Phew!

“Doux, I think you have to go. My brother is coming towards us, and I don’t think he’s in the mood to see you right now,” y/n warned you, pointing towards her brother and Toby. “I agree. See you tonight,” you said, giving y/n a salute and rode off the opposite direction to your apartment. You barged into your apartment, which startled Archie, making him jump. “Sorry Arch!” you shouted and went into your room, to get started on homework. After finishing your homework, you got ready for the concert. “Archie! I’ll be back by 10,” you said, walking out of the door. “That’s what you said yesterday, but you didn’t, since you ran into trouble,” Archie said. “Well this time I will,” you said, closing the door. You got your bike and rode over to the square since your apartment wasn’t far from the square. You saw the Jason was already there, starting to set up. “Hey Jason!” you called out. “Hey, Douxie! The others are at Sam’s as well as our backup guitarist! So head over there!” Jason yelled at you. You placed your guitar on the stage and rode over to Sam’s. Who is the backup guitarist?

Once you had reached Sam’s, you saw Jack, Henry, and a guy you didn’t recognize. You walked in and sat in front of Jack and the guy you didn’t know and next to Henry. “Hey Doux. This is Tyler, our backup guitarist,” Henry introduced you. “Hi, nice to meet you,” you said, giving Jack a quick look that asked if he was the same Tyler that had a huge crush on y/n. Jack nodded. “Tyler this is Douxie, well his actual name is Hisirdoux, but he likes to be called Douxie,” Henry said to Tyler. “Hey Douxie, nice to meet you as well,” Tyler said. You just nodded and pasted on a smile, not wanting to be rude. “So how did you guys find Tyler?” you asked. “We saw him practicing his guitar in the music room, and he was awesome! So we thought, why not ask him to be our backup guitarist?” Henry explained. “I’ve seen you around school Douxie, you seem pretty popular. You charm the girls,” Tyler commented, taking a sip from his drink. “Yeah, I guess. I just kinda have that talent, but it’s not intentional, it just happens naturally,” you said. “Mhm, so you can help me with a certain someone then?” Tyler asked. “Um...I’ll try,” you replied. Before he could continue, you quickly checked the time and interrupted, “We should head back to the square, we still need to set up.” All of them nodded, and we all headed back. When you all were back at the square, you could see some people starting to come. You helped out Jason, trying to avoid Tyler from asking you to help him with a ‘certain someone.

Once you had finished setting up, you looked at the time, it was just 10 minutes until 8:30.

#douxie x reader #hisirdoux x reader #hisirdoux casperan x reader #trollhunters #tales of arcadia #douxie’s POV

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kaishun · 4 years

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Fanexus - Upcoming Fandom-focused Platform

Hey y’all, Kaishun here, who hasn’t spoken in 85 years but still vaguely lurks around in the corners of your peripherals. As you guys probably know, with the tumblr ban on NSFW (both for things that actually were NSFW and vaguely fleshy colored), a lot of big folks in the fandom left for twitter. Well, twitter sucks, as it’s impossible to finding anything. Nobody tags stuff, because there’s not enough space to do so, and harassment’s pretty bad (both due to lack of tagging and due to tagging).

Fanexus is a platform wanting to change that! It’s kinda’ve the love child between tumblr and livejournal, and with the beta coming up soon, they’re trying to drum up some hype. I’m hype, so, I’m gonna go over some of my fav official features so far:

Proship / Anti-Harassment / Anti-Censorship

Useful Tagging System ( #Saix = #Saïx )

3 Accounts in 1 (1 login for 3 different blogs)

Details on^ below the cut. Here’s a pretty picture from their blog @fanexus-dot-net to show its progress:

Proship, Harassment, and Censorship (Don’t Like/Don’t Read)

A lot of platforms and people are aggressively censoring fictional content they don’t like. Whether that be two characters lewding in general, those character being in an abusive relationships, noncon, age gaps, underaged, incest, etc.-- a lot of people get harassed for drawing that kind of stuff. But, y’know-- it’s fictional. No different from the whole “video games cause violence” scare from moms in the 90s. But the harassment from people has gotten really bad, especially on twitter.

Fanexus allows whatever you want to draw/write/etc., as long as it is of fictional characters--with a great tagging system to support it. If you don’t like something... you block the tag! Bam, that simple. You shouldn’t see anymore.

For those of you who went to Pillowfort, and were displeased with the sudden rule change & bans regarding some content, Fanexus should have no such issue. They’re hosting in Denmark, where the country’s sex specialists determined that underaged content of fictional characters did not have a negative impact on actual children.

Useful Tagging System

idk about you, but I hate looking under the 10 different names for the same ship. Every other new artist seems to have another name for their fav pairing. Fanexus has a tagging system that support synonyms-- meaning “#XemSai”, “#Xemnas x Saix”, “#Xemnas/Saïx”, etc. will all show up under the same “#XemSai” search.

Its tagging is also hierarchical-- so if someone tags something with just “#XemSai”, it’ll show up under show up #Xemnas, #Saix, and #Kingdom Hearts. While this may come off as a bit scary at first (there’s such a “don’t put X in the main tag!” concern on tumblr), it normalizes letting your art/fics to be actually, like... seen. And if someone doesn’t like it #XemSai, they can just block the tag. This greatly decreases the chance of shy people with rarepairs just being lost to the abyss, never seen again. As someone who’s in some small fandoms, “forcing” everything to go into the series tag is a great feature to me.

It also lets people completely block series-- block the #Kingdom Hearts tag if you don’t want to see Melody of Memory spoilers. As long as they’ve tagged their posts with anything regarding the series, it’ll get caught up in that block filter, so you can safely play the game and still browse your feed.

Aliases (3 Accounts in 1)

With one account, you have three different “Alias” blogs. These generally function like completely different blogs (none of that sideblog shit); with their own posts, their own followers, their own following, and their own memberships to communities. You can switch between them with an easy click, instead of having to open a whole new browser or logout/login like on tumblr.

My plan is to have a SFW alias, a NSFW alias, and a RP alias. I can enjoy my SFW alias at work and on the go, as well as post some OCs to it; I can switch to my NSFW alias if I want to see some juicy smut on a lazy weekend; and to my RP alias to catch up on what’s been going on and write some replies.

Miscellaneous

Communities: You ever think about making a blog exclusively for one character, but go “ugh sideblogs suck and I don’t want to do this by myself”? Well, Communities allow everyone who joins to share content to it, easily gathering art/fics from your favorite character or series in one place. It’s a great way to find people with similar interests, follow some new artists, etc. Roleplay-wise, theoretically great for “Worlds”; tossing an opener into the themed world and getting some replies.

Funding: They’re currently planning on no ads, and funding via premium features, such as buying extra aliases. There’ll be a Kickstarter later for server cost and additional features.

People/Fans: I’ve been on their discord for a few weeks, and holy shit, these are my people. I’ve never felt so comfortable just like... chatting about my interests with people. I’m not the #1 sinner in the server at all times, like I am everywhere else. Discussions I’ve normally seen blow up into huge raging disagreements kinda just simmer to slightly irritable but still civil conversations. It’s kinda bizarre to witness, like... mature people talking to mature people.

Minors: Minors will not be able to see posts marked as 18+, full stop. You can also mark your entire blog as 18+, but you’re not required to. Minors who lie about their age will have their accounts banned.

Interested?: Their beta is going to be starting sometime late this month. You can find more details on their tumblr blog ( https://fanexus-dot-net.tumblr.com/ ) or their twitter ( https://twitter.com/fanexus ). You can sign up for their forum/discord/beta over here: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1-Ll_vb1bukbnxHpaQcuxUikUu1NtqDk3-AsD4gZkjiY/viewform?edit_requested=true

#fanexus #hashtag not sponsored #I just really like what I see #fanexus-dot-net

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kangyeosaang · 3 years

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#showyourprocess

From planning to posting, share your process for making creative content!

To continue supporting content makers, this tag game is meant to show the entire process of making creative content: this can be for any creation.

RULES — When your work is tagged, show the process of its creation from planning to posting, then tag 5 people with a specific link to one of their creative works you’d like to see the process of. Use the tag #showyourprocess so we can find yours!

thank you csenge @imdefs for tagging me to show how i made this set ✨

buckle up folks this is gonna be long bc min. character limit uni papers thought me a lot of things but def not how to be concise

01. planning

this was a long time ago but i do remember wanting to make something with overlays bc quite honestly i started working on this way too late and it seemed the fastest lmao. jokes on me i had 2 failed attempts and this also went through some changes along the way. initially i wanted to combine dye, bol and present:you... them being my fave eras for this lovable dumb man. so it would’ve been one pair for each gif.

02. creating

picking footage

so onto creating,, first things first the concept had to be changed bc present:you only had light shots so that had to be removed rip, here you can see a failed attempt at me trying to include it. this was before i started making proof on concepts for gifsets which later on saved me so much time... but not this time

once i accepted defeat i had to reshuffle the shots and add some new ones but it was all good i was not losing braincells at all. so onto the real gifs, gonna show you the red one bc that’s my fave of the three.

making the base

btw i’m always working with timelines and smart objects bc it feels way easier than frames. so here we started with this jaebeom, and since the background and his hair it’s pretty dark those will be the parts which will be covered with the next gif. i made it black and white and also adjusted the levels a bit to make it a bit softer (lowered the whites and lightened the blacks)

for aesthetic purposes i always go for one close shot and one wider shot, then literally all i did was add the other gif on top, and set it to lighten. okay this is it that’s the whole process bye. oh we need the rest too? okay okay. so btw for a while i was considering making both of them coloured but then bw looked better when having all three gifs under each other, felt more like a ‘set’

now for this gif in particular i did not need to mask anything, shocking, but for the others i had to either blend the edges or make the bottom layer darker at some places to let the top layer show up a bit more e.g. for the second gif i needed a tiny blending like so (it’s the layer 1 copy 3 lmao)

making the overlay bits

then we are basically done with the main part of the gifs, obviously i applied colouring to each inside the smart object. but i always like to add something extra on top which are usually two things: 1.) full overlay gif something blurred (literally any kind of footage.. i used leaves, water, space renders etc. so far), or a light leak, oooor a bokeh effect whatever and just keep it subtle. and 2.) some smaller moving bits which are usually sparkles, dust, stars, galaxy stuff etc. u get the idea. for the above gif this happens to be Layer 1 copy 2 rip. also in this case this overlay is actually this jaebeom footage blurred and with some colouring added on top of it to have this redish brassy tone (not me forgetting about this completely lmao) obviously it’s zoomed in and i’m using the top left part of the video blurred. look at me explaining my chosen gif with another gifs gahd i’m bad at this. anyways it just goes to show i use practially anything i can think of and just blur it.

for the full overlay footage i either go black and white and set it to overlay or soft light, whatever works best, or go coloured and set it to lighten again.... whatever blending mode works best. for this specific 2nd gif i went with lighten. for the smaller moving bits same tbh i just adjust the levels/curves to only show the bits i need when it’s set to lighten, i.e. i make its background more black so it won’t make the gif hazy.

adding the text

so anyways i add those on top so it’s not boring anymore,, practically just concealing the fact that all i‘ve really done was adding a gif on top of another and set it to lighten rip. oh yeah we have the text layers, nothing fancy here: for the script i used Challenge and the serif is FogtwoNo5. For the script i sampled some red from the background and just set it to overlay, and for the serif i just went with full caps adding some extra kerning bc one: for full caps you always need that, not this much lol, and two: it just looks better okay.

last touches

then i added a levels adjustment layer because i felt the gifs were a bit brighter than i wanted, so we ended up with this

saviiiiiing

oh my gahd we are almost theeeere, for saving gifs here are my settings, i did not have to tell photoshop which colours to use luckily so it was an easy process.

03. posting

eeehmmm posting... yeah nothing exciting? i just save it in my drafts check it on mobile, and if something is really messed up i’ll change some colouring and saving settings, but this was a fairly ‘easy’ gif for tumblr to compress decently so none of that.

if you read this far bruh.... i don’t think i’ve made sense anyways thank yooouuu 💕

and the five amazing CCs i’m tagging are

🎬 dear wifey, rosie @se-jun for these victon posters which i definitely did not make her choose and we ended up with the same i would’ve chosen 🌈 vivi @yeekies for making a rainbow from the mostly yellow blob that is the fireworks mv 💙 yv @woodzm for this beauty where the blues are colourmatched so well it makes me mad 🌸 lotta @halahala for this miracle of a gifset which made me not despise pink 🌈 bridget @lilacwoo for this 12/10 rainbow right here because apparently i like rainbows. shocking.

feel free to ignore and all them usual stuff

#tag game #showyourprocess #gif tutorial #i guess #ps*#hahahahah also let's all ignore the fact i told csenge i'd show her how i make these things and then i completely forgot about it #sooorryyyy im so dumb

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cuddlybitch · 3 years

Text

#ShowYourProcess

From planning to posting, share your process for making creative content!

To continue supporting content makers, this tag game is meant to show the entire process of making creative content: this can be for any creation.

RULES: When your work is tagged, show the process of its creation from planning to posting, then tag 5 people with a specific link to one of their creative works you’d like to see the process of. Use the tag #showyourprocess so we can find yours!

@haeyeongs and @moonlightsdream tagged me and chose my Extraordinary You gifset. Thank you Camille and Layla 💐💖💖

Tagging the following folks if they want to do it:

@savingfaces for this set

@sjoongki for this set

@anya-chalotra for this set

@dramaism for this set

@dead-end-street for this set

@monae for this set

@inejz-ghafa for this set

@komunyoung for this set

(Technically, I was tagged twice so I can tag around 10 people right? 🤪)

PLANNING

The planning for this set started simple enough, as it was made for Day 1 of the #KDRAMAWOMENSWEEK prompts, which was "Doubles/Foils".

I immediately thought of making something for Extraordinary You given the show's premise. My first idea was to make something out of Eun Dan-oh being the actual show's main character, but the "extra" in the comic book their characters live in vs Yeo Joo-da as the "protagonist" of the comic book, but a supporting character in the actual show.

Unfortunately, Na-eun and her kpop group got exposed for bullying one of their bandmates at around that time, so this was scrapped.

I still wanted to work with Extraordinary You, so I pivoted to focusing on Dan-oh's character, juxtaposing her comic book/stage character with her true, off-stage character. With this in mind, I wanted to ensure I display both her "stage" self and her "true" self in the set, so I started looking for and screencapping scenes I can use for the set.

On this note, I also made it my goal for this event to learn how to blend and overlay gifs. I forced myself to only make sets in these styles I've never tried.

I perused @anya-chalotra tutorial on putting multiple gifs into one using shapes for my first scrapped idea, and @inejz-ghafa tutorial on blending gifs, which I ended up relying on the most as I began creating.

CREATING

Let's just say creating was a messy process for me because this was my first time attempting to do a blended gif.

To start, I was just speed-browsing through Extraordinary You episodes, and capping as much scenes I could potentially use as possible. I wanted to focus on how stage!Dan-oh is always portrayed by the writer as weak and sickly, and shadow!Dan-oh is more strong-willed and full of life, and blend those two together.

I think with experience, I will probably learn how to make better screencapping choices, but at this point, I was just in the I WILL MAKE IT WORK AND BLEND IT mode.

Anyway, I coloured the gifs first as I saw fit, before blending. As you can see for this one I had a lot of PSDs saved. Essentially for each gifset, I have the base PSD, the accent PSD (which essentially will be what I blend with the base), and the blended gifset (where I experiment with the blending, and adjust colouring). If there's gonna be text on the gifset, I also save that as a another PSD, so that's around 3-4 PSDs per gif.

The colouring itself just follows my usual process for doing my coloured gifs. The only thing I thing I did differently is to colour the area where I want to blend with a black paint brush, and set that layer to Soft Light, and duplicated the layer, changed the opacity of the layer until I achieve the darkness I need for my blended gif.

I kept the colouring for the accent gif for this one pretty basic...

Because I ended up adding the purple colouring later on after I blended the gifs together.

After I've made my colouring adjustments to the blended gif, I converted everything into 1 smart object, added noise, then converted back to frame animation so I can add text.

The process is the same for pretty much all 3 gif sets, but of course I did experiment A LOT on what scenes to blend with the base gif. I think this is when experience with doing more blended gifs come into play cause I wasn't very smart in choosing the scenes to blend. I just know what idea I want, and the base gif I want to use and tried to hammer it in until it looked passable to me. Maybe the base gif I chose isn't the easiest to use for blending, etc., but I think making those smart choices will hopefully come to me the more experienced I become in making these types of gifs.

POSTING

For posting this one, since it was part of an event, I had it in my drafts until the event started. So I set up the caption, and tags as soon as I finished the gif set, and saved it until I was ready to post.

In general, I do post my gifsets and save it in the drafts as I make the set. It show me the full picture of the gifset I'm creating, and helps me see whether something needs colour adjustments, or the flow of the gifset isn't looking as good as I thought.

For this particular set, I struggled a lot with the second (middle) gif because I was having a tough time finding a scene I want to blend it with, how to style it in general, and even the colouring of it... when I was posting different versions of the second set, nothing was quite working, and in the end I just went with the gif that semi-worked with the flow of the set, even though it's not 100% what I wanted because I've already spent so much time on it and I was already empty creatively.

But yeah, I do like saving the gif set in my drafts as I go along so I can keep my creative vision in check.

When the time rolled along, and the #KDRAMAWOMENSWEEK event started, I just posted it during the day and that's that.

#showyourprocess #show your process #tusercarol #usersara #userava #dramaism #dead end street #userjulieh #userbecca #komunyoung #tag game #this has been sitting in my drafts for over a month now #i kept putting it off #i honestly didn't know how to talk about it cause #it was my first time doing this type of gifs #and my mind back then was just a mix of asdjfhaksdiufasdlkfa #and flipping back and forth through the tutorial i was referring to #but thanks again for the tag camille and layla!!!#and thanks again for the awesome tutorial userbecca lol

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ramp-it-up · 3 years

Text

Fresh Squeeze, Ch. 5

Pairing: Daveed Diggs x OFC Linden Marshall

Set in 2023, post-pandemic

Warnings: Cursing, Angsty Angst, drug and alcohol use, surprise flights, Anthony Ramos. Lots of Plot.

Word Count: 3.5 K

Plot: Linden Marshall just finished law school at Columbia University in NYC. Daveed Diggs is still creating magic with his platonic life partner Rafael Casal in the form of their Blindspotting musical, Bay Boys. Linden’s boyfriend WAS Mark Monaco, star of the superhero movie series Invincible. They were together for years, and her trauma and his addictions were toxic. She knows now that wasn’t love.

A/N: Keep in mind that this the same AU as Arrivals, with Holly Woods, but is BEFORE Rafa and Holly get together. And don’t come for me about Anthony.

Read the Previous Chapter.

===================

NYC, May 2023

Jasmine was blowing up your phone as you were trying to get dressed. You had to search for it under the pile of clothes on your bed.

You had procrastinated getting ready, trying to finish one of your applications for a summer internship at this law firm in Harlem that you were excited about.

You wanted to finally relax after finishing Columbia law in the top 10% of your class. You just wanted to relax and enjoy this weekend.

Craig, your mom and your uncle were the only ones to attend your graduation. They knew you didn’t want any fanfare, so your famous friends didn’t attend, and they had a show to do, but they’d sent you tons of well wishes.

We're coming up, get decent!

You chuckled and shook your head. Anthony usually raided the refrigerator when he came over. This time, you told him to bring his own snacks..

You slipped on what you were wearing for the night. Craig was in his room getting ready and you had volunteered his place, so you were playing hostess. You were surprised that he was so chill about it, actually.

“Pika Pika,” you said to yourself in the mirror then ran to answer the doorbell. It was almost 6 pm.

You opened the door for Cookie Monster and Big Bird. You burst out laughing. But you stopped when you saw Anthony's face. He had like five bags from Whole Foods that he was juggling in his blue arms.

"Jazzy!!!! There's my girl. Hey Ant! leave the food and your girl. We may run off together."

Anthony came in the door loaded down with bags and kissed you on the cheek.

“I love you Lindy, but fuck you man.” You punched him on the shoulder.

“Ow! Time to get this party started!”

Linden heard Jazzy’s Brooklyn accent turn into a London lilt as she started play fighting with Ant. They felt like family at this point.

=================

Ever since the launch party in January, Jasmine had pursued you as a friend persistently. You normally didn’t let anyone in because of the circumstances of your life, but Jas was oblivious to your awkwardness with normal human beings.

“Girl, you are fucking DOPE, and you are NOT gonna deny my love. I know your life has been a trip, and you don’t have to tell me all of it, but I’m not gonna let you shrivel up and be a little retiring wallflower. Life is to be lived.”

Jasmine telling you that during a Saturday brunch date in February was the key to your heart. She drew you out, and you didn’t see what value you added to her life.

But she loved you anyway. And you loved her, and of course, Anthony was part of the package.

He was beautiful, loud, talented, and reckless, but he reminded you too fucking much of Dell to be annoyed with him very long.

Your circle had certainly widened from just Craig. That was one thing for which you could thank Mark. You were working on him being a distant memory. He hadn’t lasted too long in Bay Boys, quitting soon after the musical opened in March.

Daveed’s hands and feet had ‘slipped’ one too many times during the scene when he was stomping his ass on stage. Mark cited health reasons, and publicly spiraled a bit. He was currently in rehab.

Again.

You had not heard from him and that was absolutely fine with you.

Because Jasmine was in Bay Boys and that was her life, the cast and crew became yours as well. Rafael was the type of chaotic creative genius that fascinated you; you could listen to him talk for hours.

Things with Daveed were more tricky. Ever since that awkwardness with him after the launch party, you’d kept your distance, but you hung out a lot, so you were trying to be friends.

When you and Jas and Ant and Rafa hung out and talked, Daveed was there, smiling shyly and sneaking glances at you, throwing in pearls of wisdom every so often.

He was so dope and so talented and intelligent and so freaking hot, but you were trying to get yourself together. You were convinced that night in January had been a mistake.

You needed some space. And time. Law school was no joke, and you were in therapy so entanglements was not what was up.

Daveed sensed your hesitancy and decided to stop pursuing you. But he couldn’t stop how he felt.

You were both a little wasted and keyed up the night of the launch party, and despite the way you were beautiful and intelligent and sexy as fucking hell, he was not going to press you.

Daveed was sure that you two could be something special if you would give it a chance, but he didn’t want to chase you, but he was so gone for you, that if you just nodded your head at him, he would be at your feet.

The attraction was undeniable. There was a crazy little dance you two did that everyone recognized and respected. This group seemed to know you were fragile, and that you didn’t need to be pushed too far.

But the more they persisted, the more you came out of your shell. The more you trusted, the more the old Lindy came back.

Craig noticed first soon after you started hanging with the crew when you were trying to find a place to live. He went to one showing with you and sat you down for a talk.

“Girl, I love the light in your eyes. I haven’t seen this Lindy since…well in a long time. Stay with me for as long as you want. I know you need to get through this last semester of school, you don’t need one more thing to think about. I’m proud of the work that you’re doing on yourself, Linden.”

You were grateful to Craig. His place on the Upper West Side was super convenient to Columbia, and not having to think about finding a place was so clutch. Third year was kicking your ass.

“Besides, I wouldn’t have this place if it wasn’t for…”

“Hush, I don’t want to hear that. Dell would have wanted this. I love you cuzzo.”

=================

Craig came out in a Sully onesie and immediately dragged Jasmine into a conversation about the Met Gala that had happened a few days ago.

You approached the kitchen where Ant stood, food all around him on the counter. You were whispering. He smiled a secret smile at you.

“I’m so proud of you doing this for Jasmine. It’s good for you all to get away. I’m glad that she got a little break. She deserves it all.”

Anthony had arranged for this little get together to be a surprise for Jasmine. This was going to be a kickback weekend.

The show was on a four day hiatus while the set was moved to a bigger theatre. It was a hit and was destined for a long run.

Ant’s green eyes lit up as you kept talking about Jasmine.

“Yeah, she does. And the woman of the hour deserves all the happiness in the world.” He lifted his beer to you.

They way he said that was weird and you were about to ask him what was up with that when the doorbell started ringing, you went to answer it and were stuck there for a few minutes as people started coming in.

The food and the drinks were flowing while all kinds of characters came in.

Now they also had Jack Skellingtom, and a Care Bear in the house to add to Big bird, Cookie Monster, Pikachu and Sully. It was an odd cast of characters who were jamming to 90's rap, eating chicken wings and basically tripping like only friends could do.

Then there was Toni, some tag-along chick who showed up with Rafa. She had on a plain gray onesie. What a downer.

You’d pegged her for a star fucker who only hung with Rafa because of who he and his friends were. The girl was too much in everyone's business.

"Sooooo. You and Mark ARE broken up for real for real. The tabloids say y’all are back together! I told my friend Susie you weren’t, but she wouldn't believe me."

You just smiled and didn't confirm or deny, treating Toni like the paparazzi. The girl was oblivious to your hate and just kept talking.

Daveed rescued you.

"Hey, Toni, show these folks how you can blow. They're setting up the karaoke machine over there. Show us what you're working with. Someone might hook you up with a gig."

Toni perked up and hurried over to Anthony and Craig, who were setting up the lyrics on the big screen to match the karaoke music. Some Bad Boy joints were up.

Rafa was behind them screaming, "Dylan, Dylan, Dylan!"

They were a scene. You breathed and relaxed a little.

"Don't stress. She's not coming with us to the island."

You looked up at the tall, fine Grumpy Care Bear who was nursing some of your special 18-year-old Chivas Regal that you had gotten for graduation. His beautiful smile shined out of his brown face and beneath the curls tumbling out of his hood.

“I’m not pressed. I’m chilling. You can do what you want. With who you want.”

“She’s not with me. Rafa brought her for the ride to the airport. And it’s not entirely true that I can do what I want. With who I want. Because what if who I want to do doesn’t want to do me?”

You knew what he meant. But you eyed his drink instead of looking at him. It wasn’t that you didn’t want him. That was far from the truth. You didn’t want to get lost in him. And you could see that happening.

Daveed saw your wheels turning. You were over analyzing again. He’d spent three months observing you every chance he got. He felt like he knew your anxieties. So fucking smart, but here you were thinking too much.

"Hey Genuis Ass. Want some?" Daveed’s voice was softer as he grinned and offered you some of his drink. “Or, I could go make you something?” For some reason he wanted you to get loose.

"Nah, I'm good Diggs.” For some reason you needed to stay in control. You played it off by changing the subject.

“I still can’t believe y’all call me that.”

Daveed just smiled and nodded, chuckling a little. He craned his neck and looked at it, having to dodge a smack upside the head.

“That ass is genius, you know. That’s the one thing He Who Shall Not Be Named was right about. And you’re one of the smartest humans I know.”

You had to look at him then. The flecks of gold in his eyes tho. But you could tell from the slight redness that he was a little zooted. He didn’t get that way around you a lot, but you knew for the stories that he partied occasionally.

He and Rafa and that Toni chick must have pre-gamed. You remembered the last time you two were tipsy together.You cleared your throat and looked away.

“Why did you lie to that girl? She can’t sing.” You were shaking your head, scowling at Toni’s screeching from the karaoke machine.

He winked at you. D was well on his way to getting LIT.

"What? She can blow.” Daveed sipped his drink and watched her.

“She’ll suck your soul out and spit it back in your mouth." Daveed was loose. And so was his mouth. But he didn’t care.

Your mouth was hanging open at Daveed as you wondered what Daveed had done with Toni, what Daveed AND Rafa had done with Toni...

Shit, you were just going to ask.

"How do you know that she..."

"AWWWW SHEEEIIIITTT! THAT'S MY JAM! REMEMBER THIS LINDY??"

“No, I was like, negative 5..”

You raised your voice as he traveled away from you, smiling. He was not slick.

“Well you missed out being tardy to the party…”

He was backing toward the mic, knocking it out of Anthony’s hand and starting the rap. Rafa joined him, trading verses.

Now as the record spins around, you recognize this sound,

Well, it's the underground,

You know that we're down with wutchyalike

Yeah, with wutchyalike, yeah

And though we're usually on the serious tip, check it out:

Tonight we're gonna flip and trip and let it all hang out tonight,

We're gonna say what we like.

'Cause, yo, yo, we want to know how many people in the flow,

Would like to just let yourselves go

And doowutchyalike,

Yeah, well tonight's your night.

Just eat food, try not to be crude or rude,

Kill the attitude, chill the serious mood,

And doowutchyalike,

Yeah, and doowutchyalike,

Everybody doowutchyalike

Everyone was dancing and Daveed had effectively deflected your question. But you would never forget.

By 8 o’clock, Craig grabbed the mic and motioned for Jasmine to come with him. You had enjoyed some cocktails finally, and just figured they were going to duet Wind Beneath My Wings just like they always did.

You were actually moving to the music and feeling good.

"Ok guys, whew. I'm hot. Is it hot in herrrre?" Craig was fanning himself.

“Whoooo! Nelly!”

You yelled and everyone laughed.

Craig took his hood off and started to unzip his onesie. Jasmine did the same.

You kept dancing nervously, not realizing it, looking around at the others who were also disrobing. You did a double take as D’s abs came into view. What was going on?

Craig continued.

"Lindy, I just need a minute to talk, can you stop whatever it is you're doing?" He grinned at you from across the room. "You're still moving Lindy."

You blushed and stopped fidgeting.

"Ummm, Craig, what the..."

One by one people dropped their onesies, all except Toni, who had no clue what was going on. Soon, everyone was standing in Craig’s condo in their swimsuits, looking fine as hell.

You just looked around, then in your cup wondering if you were too drunk and hallucinating.

“Lindy, you’ve worked real hard, and this past few months have been crazy, so we wanted to do something special for you this weekend, for your graduation, and for your birthday, WHICH IS SUNDAY!!”

Everyone cheered as Jasmine took the mic. “You think this party is for me. Well the joke’s on you bitch, because you have been hosting your own party!”

You opened your mouth, squeaked a little, then spoke,

"But why?.. Everybody? But what..."

Daveed moved close.

"Damn, you fine," you whispered.

Your hand flew to your mouth when he smirked in response. Everyone was rolling because turns out, you didn’t whisper.

Daveed cleared his throat. "Thank you. You’re fine yaseif. Anyway, Anthony and Jasmine have a house there, and we’re flying out of JFK tonight. In about two and a half hours in fact. So we gotta get going.”

You still had only a part of a clue of what was going on. But you couldn't resist all of this.

"Okay? But... I don't have any clothes. And I don’t have a ticket..."

Craig came from the storage room off the kitchen with one of your suitcases. Others started getting their bags as well

"Everybody's shit has been in my house for a week. And girl, you know I got your information. It ain’t nothing but a thang. Your ticket is ready and waiting. Just sent it to your email.”

Your mouth dropped open and you stared at Craig as everyone pulled their onesies back up and got their bags together.

Your eyes filled with tears that you hurriedly brushed away. Craig came over and hugged you. Then every else joined in for a group hug.

"You deserve, Lindy. Let us celebrate you."

You looked like you didn't quite believe it, but you went along. You laughed, visibly deciding to go with the flow.

"I'm down!"

Toni was nearby. When the hug broke up, she started asking questions. Your patience was wearing thin.

"I don’t believe that all these people really roll like this. Y’all wild. Susie won that bet."

You just continued to look at this fool.

"But isn’t this dope? All these famous, successful men being so fearless with their love and appreciation for Black women, of all people. Who woulda thunk they didn't want white women?"

Toni just kept saying the wrong thing. It was the "of all people" for you.

You stared daggers at your houseguest. Toni caught the look.

"Wait, are you mixed?"

You narrowed your eyes and said, "Black mixed with Black."

Toni clutched her pearls.

"Oh wow. Didn't mean to offend. I just mean everyone knows Jasmine is mixed, with her dad and all, as black as can be. But her white British mom saved her from his skin tone. I mean, she has braids in now, so you can see it, but all she has to do is blow her hair straight and she can pass..."

Toni jumped when Rafa spoke. She didn't know he was there.

"Toni. Not Jas. She's the homie."

The look in his ice blue eyes could burn.

"And you are a Black woman, so you know how dope they are. Why would anyone NOT worship at your feet?"

Lindy just sipped her drink as Craig entered the chat. "Amen!"

"Maybe it is time for you to get going, honey. I might call you when I get back."

Rafa led Toni to the door as she protested.

"But I was going to take you to the air..."

"And I APPRECIATE you Black woman, but we'll get there. See you later."

Then Rafa shut the door in her face. Linden discovered she loved him eternally at that moment. She was rolling.

No one mourned Toni’s departure as arrangements were made for cars to take everyone to the airport.

"You and Daveed can ride with us, Rafa." Ant to the rescue.

"Yeah, Jasmine loves to look at my profile." Jas pinched him so hard he jumped.

“Fuck!”

Ant was screaming as he, Jasmine and Rafa went out the door.

"Peace! See you at airport security. If you get nabbed by TSA, you on your own!”

Daveed lingered. “I don’t know if all of us and our bags will fit in one car. Can I ride with you and Lindy, Craig?”

Craig smirked at Daveed, but didn’t say anything. “Of course...you good with that Lindy?”

You tried to keep it light.

“Sure.. no biggie,” you cleared your throat and headed to the bathroom to make sure you had everything you needed.

=================

By the time you got to your Uber, the traffic was horrible. It took over an hour to get to the airport. You felt both anxious about missing the flight and keyed up about sitting next to Daveed in the car.

His thigh and side pressing into yours in the dark in the back of an Uber Black brought back memories of that reckless night.

When he put his arm up on the seat behind you, “For more room,” he said, in that voice and flashing that megawatt smile, you were enveloped more into his scent and warmth. You had to control yourself not to melt into him.

Craig was sitting on his phone, sneaking glances at you and smirking the entire ride. He’d insisted that you be in the middle because you were so tiny.

The whole world was against you, you thought, as you and Daveed both stared straight ahead, both flashing back to that January night.

You were the last three people to run through the airline gate just at they were about to close it. All your friends in first class cheered when you took their seats, and Rafa popped a bottle of champagne.

"Talk about cutting it close," Ant commented as Rafa gave Daveed a high five.

Daveed looked at you. You shook your head at him. Somehow, you were sitting next to him. You just decided to let it be and have some time.

“Just make sure you don’t molest me under this blanket, Ms. Marshall,” Daveed intoned when you were settled and given amenities for the night.

The flight attendant had to tell y’all to keep quiet as the cat calls went up.

Welp, you thought. This will be the vibe the entire weekend.

You weren’t mad at it. You loved these people. And you were safe. You just smiled, settled down, and looked out of the window to watch the lights of New York fade away.

=================

Read the next chapter

Thanks for liking, reblogging, and commenting.

Tagging: @braidedchallah @einfachniemand @sillyteecup @commandersmiley @ohsoverykeri-blog @theselilwonders @theatrenerd86 @sebastianabucknettastan @imatyoursurrvicesurr @riiyy @ivycomet @lonelydance @jbrizzywrites @id-do-it-for-free-babe

#Daveed Diggs #daveed x reader #daveed diggs x black reader #daveed diggs x ofc reader #Daveed diggs x ofc black reader #daveed diggs x you #daveed diggs imagine #daveed diggs angst #daveed diggs fluff #anthony ramos #jasmine cephas jones #Rafael Casal #Hamilfam #blindspotting #Daveed x Linden

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what-the--curtains · 3 years

Text

Alliance

Chapter 2 – The Decision

(Mando x f!reader)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary: The child taken, his ship destroyed the only one who can help him? A woman he sold into slavery several months earlier.

Notes: Wow wow wow! Thank all for the likes im glad ive gained some interest lets hope I can keep it! Comment or message to be added to the tagged list!

Tw: mentions of dubcon/sex, depictions of violence and coarse language

Tagged list: @crazycookiecrumbles

Word count: 3.7k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

7 months later

Mandos POV

Using all his wits and a touch of charm the Mandalorian had managed to make his way to a nearby town. Once there he’d likely be able to hitch a ride or win some kind of ship in a game of cards. He didn’t need a good one, just something to get him to Navarro. He makes his way to a more upscale bar, hoping its clients would be more lucrative with their belongings. Scanning the gambling hall he chooses his target carefully, opting for a rich looking idiot who had been trying to impress the man next to him since the Mandalorian had walked in. He takes his seat at the round wooden table amongst a variety of lavishly dressed characters. He had to find the child as soon as possible. If he wasn’t with the empire yet there’s no doubt he would be soon.

“Deal me in” He says, taking a seat between an Iktotchi and an Ortolan.

“Not so fast, what's your buy in?” the dealer asks.

“How about that helmet?” The Ortolan pipes up.

“No.”

“The creature then?” the Falleen across the table ponders reaching out to touch Anya, who had been at his side when Grogu was taken and has refused to leave it since.

“No” he says, batting her hand away and tapping on his shoulder piece “Will this do?” The dealer nods and they begin. In the second hand he ends up winning a ship from his target who was seemingly unbothered by the loss as he nonchalantly tosses Mando the keys, before leaving the table.

Twirling the key on his index finger he makes his way to the bar, hoping to gain some insight on how to go about finding Grogu.

“Quite a game, didn’t know Mandalorians played cards.” The older humanoid bartender stated, shining off a glass. With no response he speaks up again. “Can I help you with something , give me something to tell the kids if I helped out a Mandalorian.”

“If someone was looking to find something lost where would he go?”

“You have any idea what this thing is?”

“Yes.”

“Any idea where it is?”

“No.”

“Tell you what, there was a woman, from a forest planet somewhere on the outer rim. Hair as white as snow, an old language on her body, a face that’s hard to forget. She helped me find my youngest after she was taken by smugglers.”

“Vryssa?” The Mandalorian says slowly, causing Anya to perk up.

“Aye that’s the place. You’ve been?” the barkeep ponders.

“Thank you, here” he says handing over a portion of the credits won in his game of cards to the speechless keeper.

Exiting the bar shaking his head in disbelief, of course the one person who could help him track the kid was someone with a personal vendetta against him. At least he knew who he had to find and where to start looking. Opening the doors to his new ship he gives it a quick once over. It was roomier than the razor crest, but not by much, too fancy for his liking in all honesty. Nicer amenities though and a decent sized bed which Anya had made her way onto, it would be a better place for when he gets the kid back. It had an armoury, but nothing in it, at least not yet. He closes it and makes his way up to the ship's cockpit. Decent enough system, more of a flashy ride than a functional one, made for a decently skilled pilot by the looks of it. Locking in the coordinates for Coruscant he begins his search.

For two weeks he attends black markets around the galaxy until one day he sees him, the man who had bought you. He follows him cornering him in a nearby alleyway.

“What do you want Mando?” The Kel Dor responds.

“I’m looking for a woman.”

“Aren’t we all?”

“She was bought by you a few months ago. Not jogging your memory? White hair, eternal blood.”

“Oh. Her difficult one, had to break her in a bit.” The choice of words was less than favourable to the Mandalorian, but in favor of time he brushed by it.

“What happened to her?”

“ Sold her.”

“ To who?” He says getting impatient

“Gladiatorial ring on Geonosis , she was a big hit, sold her for twice what I had paid, moved into the big arenas quickly. I’ll take you if you want.”

“No, give me the coordinates.” Mando says

“Should be easy enough for you to get her. She's been broken in well, nice and obedient if you know…” He knocks the guy out before he can finish the sentence.

R-16, Geonosis, Outer Rim Territories

Stepping out of the ship it doesn’t take long for him to figure out where you are. Large projections of posters with you line the street, apparently you were fighting today. The sounds of the arena increase as he gets closer, as does the crowd of people awaiting the show.

“A Mandalorian, you here to see the fight? Gonna be a good one. Fan favourite tonight the huntress.” A native geonosian exclaims.

“Is she the girl in the picture? The white haired one?”

“ Yes, and if you like what you see I’m sure a piece of that armour will get you a night with her, I’ve heard the trainer sells her off after fights.” The Mandalorian nods and heads off “How much for a ticket” he ask the seller,

“100 credits”

“For a fight?”

“For today’s fight? Yes.” Begrudgingly he pays the fee and enters into the dome. It is enormous, the revenue it brings in must be astronomical he thinks as he takes his seat.

Your POV

It hadn’t been an easy few months, but you were still alive. The handlers knew if they bled you all at once the value would decrease, and after having you fight and win over the fans, keeping you alive became more economically sound than killing you. Your most recent trainer, an older Duras named San Korliks, had gotten you into a slightly more dubious but very lucrative business. Turns out the rich love nothing more than spending the night with a victor. Between the fights and the suitors you’d have enough saved to live comfortably once you were out. Yes you were close to buying your freedom, 12 fights and a few more rich idiots and you’d be out of here. You’d find a planet with plenty of sand and water and settle down living out the rest of your days in peace. You could hear the crowd cheering from your cell, San would be here for you shortly. You stand up smoothing out the red tunic that had seen better days. It was shorter than you’d like and impractical for fighting, but your handler was right sex sells and it had kept you alive thus far. You move to the drawer of the cell, though tightly watched it was decently large and relatively comfortable. More wins meant better quarters. You pull out the gold plated armour clipping the chest plate, arm bands and shin guards into place before lacing up your worn down brown leather boots. Moving over to the small mirror you dip your hand into a bowl of burgundy paint smearing it down your face and onto your neck then around your well defined biceps. You're admiring your work when you hear a knock on your cell door.

“C’mon darling let’s give them a show” San says, he was nicer than your previous trainers, probably as you were bringing in the big bucks. You walk over to the cell door, he opens it and guides you to the enormous door that would soon open up to the arena.

“Try to let a little blood get spilled tonight, we need to sell some.” You nod, cracking your neck and stretching out your arms. “I also have some suitors lined up, high payers.”

“How many more till I’m out?” you question.

“ Just a few more darling, promise.” He says squeezing your shoulder. You hear the crowd chanting in the background as San leaves. You grab the spear left out for you, tossing it from hand to hand to gage its weight. You bounce up and down on your toes shaking out your body and calming your mind and preparing for whatever they were planning on throwing at you tonight. You repeat the number of days until you're free in your head. You could do this, you’d done it a hundred times now. Not that the killing gets any easier, but in order to survive you had to forgo morality. The doors open and the crowd erupts in applause as you enter waving to the adoring fans.

Mando’s POV

The loud speaker blares out over the crowd “ Tonight a special event, the huntress will take on not one, not two, but four opponents! Now to make it a fair fight, only one will be allowed to challenge at a time, but we have a lovely admixture of beasts and an extra special surprise for you all. The return of another fan favorite. Hang onto your seats folks, this is going to be a night you won’t soon forget” Four versus one, Mando thinks, as he watches you enter the arena, the odds definitely weren’t in your favour. He was prepared to jump in and get you out himself if he had too, you were his only chance at finding the kid after all. He hears a rumble of applause as a door across from you opens revealing a Rancor. He watches you closely, noticing how unphased you seemed by it. In no less than a minute he sees the spear fly from your hand hitting the creature right in its jugular killing it instantly. Not bad, he thinks, but it was just a Rangor, yes they were big, but they weren’t known for being strategic fighters. You pull the spear out of its neck, the crowd cheers seemingly alerting you to the presence of the Nexu that had appeared from the door behind you. It leaps towards you and he watches intently as you tuck and roll out of the way, spear still in hand, thrilling the crowd even more.

He wonders how much of the fight is a performance and how much of it was real. You and the Nexu circle each other, seeing you plant your feet he finds himself curious as to what your next move will be. You kick the dirt up causing the creature to charge again, as it leaps you take a knee lifting the top of the spear up, slicing the creature open causing its guts to fall down on you earning more zealous applause from the arena. He sees you stand up lifting your arms to get the crowd chanting, more showmanship. “What can you tell me about her?” he asks the couple sitting next to him. “Never lost a fight, and she’s beautiful, you need anything else?” They reply. He sees you wiping the creature's guts off your face when a door opens and a Terentatek appears, where the hell did they find one of those things the Mandalorian thinks. He sees your shoulders deflate, more so in annoyance, than fear based on the look on your face. It’s obvious you weren’t expecting a creature so large. After a few dodges and spear swipes the creature has you cornered, he sees you look side to side searching for an out, but there isn’t one, at least none he can see. Its mouth descends on you, seemingly engulfing you whole. The crowd is silent, it’s only then he notices he’s out of his seat. When had that happened? A glimmer suddenly appears from the creature's head as it gets brighter; he sees the spear had sliced through the Terentateks thick hide. The creature collapses and the skin on its head separates as you appear victorious. He sits back down observing you closely as you walk back towards the door from whence you came. The announcer's voice starts up again.

“Now for an extras special treat we’ve brought a fan favourite out of retirement, the demon slayer!” Just then the door opens and a Deveronian in head to toe black armour emerges wasting no time in launching his attack. He throws a dagger which catches you in the arm, the crowd erupts, the sight of your blood enticing them. He watches you intently as you bend over retrieving the knife off the floor and tossing it to the audience. Your opponent’s armour was thick, with very few openings in it. The crowd was getting excited, noticing that you had lost the spear to the Deveronian who had thrown it behind him.

You were the more skilled fighter, but the demon slayer was larger and stronger. He watches you try to make a pass. He thinks you’re in the clear but the opponent grabs you by the hair pulling you back into him as he brandishes another knife bringing it up to your throat. You bite down on his hand giving you just enough time to wrestle the knife from him no doubt slicing your hands open in the process. He doubts that this part of the fight was showmanship, both you and your competitor were evenly matched. It was anyone’s game. Your stunt had given you enough time to retrieve your spear. Just as he thinks you’ve gotten the upper hand he sees a mace extend out from one of the slayer’s sleeves, it sparks with electricity. If it so much as hit you, that would be it. The Mandalorian can feel his heart pounding finding himself wrapped up in the atmosphere of the arena as the creature approaches you swinging the mace. It wraps around your spear, the crowd is silent, they think it's all over, but looking at a nearby screen Mando makes out what appears to be a small smile on your face.

The mace wraps the spear and you pull back on it, hard, drawing the Deveronian in closer. As the electricity hits your arm you release the force from the pulling causing the spear to plunge up in-between the opening between the Devaronians chest plate and helmet killing him instantly. He sees you drop to your knees catching the falling opponent whispering something before laying him down on the floor. The crowd erupts in cheers, flowers and money are thrown to the ground, before picking it up he sees you circle back to each opponent kneeling on the ground for a few seconds before rising and moving on to the next.

“C’mon Mando” the people beside him say “blood auctions this way”. He follows them, but half the auditorium seemingly had the same idea and he was too far back to reach you. He sees you standing with your trainer as the blood spilled during the fight was sold to the highest bidder, the crowd intermittently grabbing at you. You’re quickly shuffled out the room. The Mandalorian exits through a back door, as he does he sees your trainer speaking to a Sephi. He hangs back, close enough to hear the conversation, but far enough away so as not to be noticed.

“Room 801. She’ll be ready for you in a half hour.”

“Perfect, makers, where will I go when she’s free? No one has ever compared to her” the client laughs.

“She’s not leaving, at least not for a while. Far too good for business at the moment. Hope’s what keeps her keen though. I oblige in her fantasies, so she can oblige yours ” The Duro gives the man the key and heads back into the arena. The man exits the alley bumping into the Mandalorian.

“Watch it Mando.” The Sephi says, pushing by him. As he pushes by, Mando snatches the key and makes his way up to room 801.

Your POV

“Hey San, how'd the rest of the auction go?” you ask, wiping off as much slime as you could in the small sink. “Good. I’ve put your cut in the bank for when you’re out. We have a client room 801, penthouse, he knows you apparently.”

“Half the galaxy knows me” you murmur “Do we have to tonight?” you ask, wanting to get out of your gear and go to sleep.

“C’mon he’s rich and not bad looking.”

“Fine” you sigh, not like you had a choice anyways. He chains your hands together and leads you up to the penthouse suite, at least you’d get to sleep in a large bed, maybe get a shower with decent water pressure. He unchains you and ushers you into the room, closing and locking the door behind you. You rub your wrists and crack you back stretching out your arms, you hear a cough. Weird, you think, clients were usually brought up after you’d had time to settle in. “I'm sorry I wasn’t expecting...” you say in your sweetest voice turning around. The tone is quickly dropped. The client was none other than the very person who had landed you in this situation.

“YOU” you shout, not thinking twice before charging at him, slipping a knife out from one of your arm bands and lunging for the Mandalorians neck. He grabs your wrists before they can make contact with him, bending them back causing you to drop the knife on the floor. He tries to restrain you causing you to panic accidentally using the force to throw him back against the wall. He crashed into the wall landing on the floor with a soft thud probably wondering what the hell’s just hit him. His hands quickly shoot up in the air, as you pick up the knife again pointing it at him.

“If you think for one second I’m going to sleep with you, you have another thing coming you stupid tin can, you’re lucky ...” you start but he cuts you off

“That’s not why I’m here.” He says quickly.

“ What?” you say, lowering your knife, but not your guard.

“ I’m here for your help.”

“ YOU want MY help? Makers you’re funny, you know I didn’t know Mandalorians could tell jokes.” you say sitting down on the bed across from him as he cautiously stands up, hands still in the air.

“I’m here to get you out” He offers.

“Why? what do you want from me?” you question

“Your help, the child he was taken I...” he pauses, you feel the sadness emanating off him, but you hold the knife true. “I need to find him before the others do, they’ll kill him.”

“Well should have thought about that before you lost him.” you say snarkily. Standing up you make your way to the door.

“Please, I can get you out of here.” He starts, you turn on your heel.

“Newsflash, I’m making my own way out of here just…”

“ ...a few more fights” he finishes for you. you look at him confused. “There never letting you out of here I heard your trainer he’s not letting you go. Something about being too good for business.” Was he telling you the truth? With the helmet covering his face it was hard to tell. From what your grandmother had told you, Mandalorians rarely lied, and deep down something was telling you to trust him.

“Bastard” you mutter moving away from the door. “Well i'll find my own way out.”

“Please” he says, taking a step towards you, causing you to lift the knife up again. “You wasted your money coming here, leave.”

“I didn’t pay”

“What?” you respond and he looks over to you . “You’re not the client?”

“No” he says dryly, as if the answer was obvious. The tension is cut by a sudden knock at the door.

“Shit, you have to hide” you say dropping the knife and pushing the Mandalorian in the direction of the bed.

“Where should I hide behind a curtain?” he deadpans

“I am not in the mood for jokes right now, get under the bed” you say lifting up the bed skirt.

“No”

“Yes” you say pointing ferociously under the bed.

“No”

“Fine, but you have to go somewhere or we're both screwed.” You say turning around to get the door. As you open it you start “look I can explain.”

“ Explain what?” The Sephi asks, pushing past you taking a seat on the bed. “You’re performance out there was almost as enticing as you” you turn back to close the door looking around the room in an attempt to locate the beskar clad man. “We’ve met before, remember?” he asked, as if you would.

“Hard to forget such a lovely night.” You lie, sitting down next to him realizing you were going to have to talk your way out of this one. “Listen, tonight’s been rough, and I want to be at my peak performance for you, we can reschedule for another night” you say stroking his cheek. The Sephi grabs your wrist, harshly. “ No, I paid for it now so I’ll get it now” . Just then you hear a blaster go off and the guy drops. The Mandalorian appears from behind the curtain

“Seriously.” you say, “I was going to deal with him”

“And I wasn’t going to sit and watch it happen,” he responds re-holstering the blaster.

“They’ll use this to keep me here forever” you say, more sad than angry.

“They were doing that anyway” the modulated voice says. “Come with me” he says reaching his arm out, “now or never”.

Standing up, you push past his hand and walk over to the dead client laying on the floor. Kneeling down you rummage around for his wallet before throwing it to the Mandalorian.

“Let’s get out of here” you say

“Here” he says, taking off his cape and offering it to you. You wrap it around yourself.

“I look like a goddamn Jawa” you say, making note of how long it looks on you.

“Come on before your handaler comes back” he says. The two of you make a swift exit, creeping through the back alleys until you reach his newly acquired ship.

#the mandolarian #mando x you #mando x reader #din dijarin x you #din djarin x you #din djarin x y/n #din djarin x reader #din dijarin x reader #Star Wars #star wars #Alliance #Chapter 2

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