#(Referencing this reminding me of a myth of him getting upset in the myth where Asclepius’s priests/doctors removed a tapeworm from a woman | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

ratinthedeadhouse · 3 years

Text

Forbidden Love

My heart is devoted to the one I shouldn’t love...

Fyodor x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Trying to keep it fluff.

"... A demon you say?" You question with hesitation, pale face bearing a frown as you try to put all the puzzles together. "That man is the super ability user and a terrorist that Yokohama is so desperate to catch? The very man, I spent countless evenings going to museums and libraries with? The very man with his astonishing diamond brain had helped me solve several murder cases?"

Silence settled between you and other Special Division Forces agents who glared at you with fear or utter confusion.

Nobody knew of your accidental connection with Fyodor Dostoevsky, or simply known as Demon Fyodor, and it sure was a surprise to you when your (e/c) eyes noticed a familiar face on all the screens and papers in the office with a screaming title: 'Wanted Criminal. Terrorist. Fyodor Dostoevsky. Highest rank ability user. Ability unknown.'

You honestly had no idea who the mysterious slender man was when you first met him at the museum. He looked charmingly tired, sharp purple eyes looked deeply into your soul while you both stood, rather awkwardly, near a woodblock painting that depicted the suffering of young children and women. Their weak bodies engulfed by flames, others were drowning in the peaceful veil of water. Despite the horrible scenario the colours united in harmony making you both stare at it for longer than you should have.

"The choice of the colour pallet... It mocks their suffering" you stated after a while, rather talking to yourself but hoping, subconsciously, that a curious stranger with a funny white hat would respond to your comment. To your amusement he did.

"Mhm," he nodded at first, pinching his chin like philosophers do while thinking and then slowly added: "Maybe the painter wanted to tell us that not all sufferings are recognizable at first glance. I noticed when walking up to the painting, the bright colours made me think of happiness and kindness, however, now that we stand closer to it we see that their very souls are in terrible agony" Fyodor's voice was soft like moonlight rays with a gentle touch of a foreign accent.

"I suppose... It depicts life itself. We never know how much one suffers due to the façade they’re putting" you said with a sad smile. At this very moment you looked delightful, Fyodor found a strange pleasure in watching your serious face merging into a saddened frown. And oh, he did it on purpose. He could've chosen a less explicit interpretation of the absurd painting but in his calculated mind he knew that this version would strike you the most... And he was right.

You still didn't move from the tiny painting, twirling a strand of your silky, (h/c) hair around your finger, beautiful eyes glued to the painting but your thoughts wandered far away.

It took one glance from Fyodor to understand your entire being, no matter how complicated you think of yourself - to him you are an open book, and he could not resist the urge to live the faint mark on one of those innocent, white pages.

“I apologize if my interpretations upset you, miss...” started Fyodor with a polite smile curving upon his frail face, but was interrupted by your sudden enthusiastic reply:

“Oh, please don’t apologize. One is a fool if they are not moved or hurt by art” your voice was gentle and soft and Fyodor couldn’t help but love your words.

Perhaps you two were more similar than he thought at first. In any case, enchanted by your watchful careful eyes, your smile and graceful movements of your hands, your speech and voice - he couldn’t just let you go like that, out of his sight.

A man tilted his head sideways a little, looking pleasantly amused, letting his dark locks fall upon his cheek, gently. “It seems that I found a charming lady who shares a similar view on things with me” something bittersweet hid in his words but it didn’t matter to you.

With a small, delightful laugh you move your right hand forward: “My name is, (y/n). A pleasure to meet you”

Expecting a handshake you watched as the man in a long dark cape came closer, gently grabbed your pale small hand and softly kissed the back of your hand;

“A beautiful name for a beautiful lady” he murmured watching how your pupils dilate. “My name is Fyodor. Would you agree to spend the rest of the evening in my company?”

Walking around with a stranger whom you’ve just met seemed like a ridiculous idea... But you felt safe around him, although his eyes were dark as a bottomless well, you agreed but made a promise to yourself to stay on guard. However, he cast away all your suspicions in just a few hours.

You became good friends, discussing ancient Myths and modern poetry embarked on philosophical journeys sitting in the dim corner of the library simply enjoying the presence of each other. He even played his cello for you under the mocking bright moon. His words and the depths of thought sometimes caught you off guard however, you were able to track his line of thoughts and in return challenged him with your endless and charming affection.

Fyodor never learnt what the word love truly meant. He could explain its psychological and physiological effect but never experienced it himself. He was in absolute control over his feelings and that is why he felt confused when you would meet him with a bright, loving smile that changed into a slightly concerned frown when you noticed dark eye-bags on his face. Why did you notice it? Why did you care? Who gave you the power to capture his heart so suddenly and so... wrongly?

For the first time in a long while, Dostoevsky felt as if he made a dreadful mistake. At first, he thought of you as a pawn. Easy to move and easy to get rid of. But you reminded him of himself... yet you were so much better! Despite your intellect and wittiness, you had a warm, loving heart, that even accepted a demon like him. It all changed when you finally opened up to him about your placement of work. That’s when he realised how forbidden your relationship would be. Soon you would find out anyway about his identity, his goals and... it would wound you. Deeply.

Soon he stopped coming to the museum where you two would usually meet. You remember that day. You took his favourite tea from the shop and held it in your cold hands while the hot drink burnt your fingers.

‘He will never come again’

You felt as if you lost a piece of your heart. But you never cried about it and kept all the memories of the mysterious man named Fyodor close to your heart, or rather what was left of your heart.

But now it all makes sense. The puzzle is complete. You stand in the room full of your colleagues who proceed to glare at you in silent amusement and your heart leapt in ecstasy. The adrenaline rushed through your blood as your cheeks turned red - you felt like the main character of your own story, engaged in a forbidden relationship with the demon himself.

You didn’t care about the consequences but on entering the Special Prison for the restrained Ability Users, shadows of doubt crept within your heart.

“Please wait here, ma’am. You sure you want to interrogate him?”

“Yes”

“In terms of emergency, we won’t be able to assist you immediately... ”

“I understand”

The heavy door was shut behind you, a metal desk was drilled into the floor and so were the chairs. No windows - just solid rock walls that reminded you of a medieval dungeon, except there were no cracks at all. Finally, you heard footsteps and another door before you was opened.

“Good afternoon, Fyodor,” you said in a strict tone trying to hide your excitement as much as you could.

His lilac eyes widened in surprise, thin lips parted as he watched you right there before him. In his head, he tried to process why you came out of your way to see him? Did he not abandon you back then? Did you not realise what a hateful creature he was?

“(Y/n)... Why are you here?” he questioned curiously.

You were now completely alone in the interrogation - underground cell. He watched you come closer to him with a soft smile looking with kindness into his soulless eyes...

“Why, you ask? Because I love you. That is the only concept you failed to fully understand. Monsters have hearts as well, they just need to learn how to love” words fell softly from your rosy lips while Fyodor closed his eyes and chuckled to himself.

“Talking to you is pure joy (y/n)! Love is the ultimate atonement of all human sins. Even a Devil needs someone to love him at the end of his immortal life...“

“... Angels did fight for Faust’s soul at the end, despite all his reckless deeds” you added referencing the work of a German poet, Goethe.

Fyodor sighed. He reached his slender cold hand towards you and you grabbed it without hesitation.

“Will you be... my angel, (y/n)?”

You nodded raising your bright eyes at him. A soft kiss was placed upon your forehead before he hugged you letting you bury your face in his shoulder. You were like a blooming flower in his deadly grip... but he would never hurt you. Ever.

People say the forbidden fruit is sweet... But is it so for the forbidden love that burns like fire?

lmao part 2 is gonna be saddddd (if I get the motivation to even write it)

#bungou stray dogs #bungou stray dogs fyodor #fyodor bsd #fyodor imagines #fyodor dostoevsky bsd #fyodor x reader #bsd dostoevsky #bsd imagines #bsd fanfic #fyodor fluff #fyodor fanfic #bsd reader #fyodor x y/n #bsd y/n #we stan the rat lord

115 notes · View notes

taeyongdoyoung · 4 years

Photo

summary: the forest is your only escape from the everyday troubles with your family until you find danger lurking behind the trees. or rather, danger finds you. your fateful encounter with the vampire ravn leaves you wishing for a different life. you strike an unexpected deal with the stranger that will soon turn into something more…

pairing: vampire!ravn x reader

genre: vampire!au, humour, fluff

warnings: unresolved sexual tension, a lot of shakespeare lmao

word count: 2.2k

part one 🌙 part two 🌙 part three 🌙 part five 🌙 part six 🌙 part seven 🌙 part eight 🌙 part nine 🌙 part ten🌙 part eleven 🌙part twelve 🌙 epilogue

A month after you started living in Ravn’s castle and you were getting anxious to go out. Not that you weren’t doing fine inside. The vampire was treating you great and you were happy to read books together, feed each other (literally) and have interesting conversations. However, you missed the fresh air outside, you missed just walking around aimlessly and wandering to new places. You didn’t want to risk your parents spotting you so the village was out of the question. The forest, though…

You wondered how to bring it up. Ravn had initially said that he doesn’t expect you to stay trapped in his castle forever, but he never mentioned it after. Maybe, he enjoyed just chilling at home. You did, too. But your adventurous spirit was eager to try something new.

As you were lost in thoughts, Ravn touched your shoulder and you jumped at the sudden contact.

“Sorry, did I frighten you?” he asked gently and sat down next to you on the couch.

“N-no, it’s fine, I was just thinking.”

“You do seem a bit antsy. Anything bothering you?”

“Why? Everything is peachy,” you quickly responded, because you still hadn’t figured out how to ask Ravn if it was okay to go out without upsetting him. You didn’t want him to think that you were ungrateful for everything he had done for you.

“Don’t lie to me, Y/N,” Ravn said in a serious tone, which made shivers run down your spine, reminding you of the first time you met him. “I can’t take that.”

“I’m s-sorry,” you whispered. “I was…hoping we could go out sometime? But I didn’t want to seem unappreciative of your efforts to make me feel at ease. Which is why I had no idea how to ask for it. I’m so sorry.”

Ravn smiled softly.

“Is that it? You didn’t have to lie. I told you that I won’t keep you prisoner, didn’t I?”

You nodded slowly.

“I know you did, but still, I’m so used to being a burden that I don’t know how to act around…around someone like you.”

“A vampire?” Ravn laughed ironically.

“No. Around someone who doesn’t judge everything I do or say.”

“Oh,” Ravn was surprised at how you viewed him. He was supposed to be the monster in the story. So, why did you treat him like a saviour of some sort?

“I mean it,” you insisted once you noticed how unsure he was.

He shook his head. This emotion thing was too new and too scary for him and he didn’t know how to deal with it.

“Where do you want to go?”

“Maybe the forest?” you asked quietly.

Ravn was shocked at your choice.

“Haven’t you been there a lot? Don’t you want to try something new?” he suggested casually.

“As long as it’s not anywhere near my parents, I’m game,” you chuckled.

“Do you want me to surprise you or would you rather know where I’m taking you?” Ravn teased, a wonderful idea already forming in his mind.

“Surprise me, then,” you lifted your chin and looked at him boldly.

“You trust me?” he repeated the question you had so far responded to negatively.

“I do, actually,” you decided to be honest for once, because he had warned you not to lie to him ever again. He was obviously taken aback by your answer.

“You stupid lamb,” Ravn chuckled and placed your hands around his neck. Then, wrapped his arms around you and lifted you up. “Hold on tight.”

And he began running at a speed that shouldn’t have been humanly possible. But yet again, he was no human. At one point the accelerated motion made you so sick that you closed your eyes and hid your head in his chest. You had no idea where you were going but the realization that it didn’t matter amazed you. He didn’t scare you. But this terrifying journey did. You probably should have warned him you had never travelled with anything faster than a bike. You had spent your entire life in your small village and the forest nearby. You were pretty sure you would pass out soon, but before that happened, Ravn stopped running.

“You may open your eyes.”

You did as he said and looked around. The first thing you noticed was how big everything around you was. The buildings, the towers, the cars, the bridges, the river. How…magnificent. And not in the way his castle was. Ravn’s home felt familiar in a way you couldn’t quite put into words. This place, wherever it was, felt so strange. But in a good way.

“Where are we?” you murmured nervously.

“Can’t you tell?”

You shook your head in embarrassment.

“Welcome to London,” Ravn informed you of your current whereabouts.

“You’re kidding!”

“Nope,” he laughed. “I thought you were into Shakespeare. How can you not recognize where we are?”

“I only managed to borrow and read some of his plays in my village. I’ve never seen…”

“Pictures of London?” Ravn helped you out when he saw you were struggling to find the right words.

You nodded, suddenly feeling intimidated by the vampire’s vast knowledge of the word.

“I’ll be your guide, then,” Ravn offered you his hand like a gentleman. “Do you want to visit the Globe Theatre first? It’s a reconstruction of-“

“I know what it is,” you responded. “Again, I haven’t seen pictures, but I read about it in one of the introductions to the book of plays.”

Ravn smiled proudly.

“That’s my girl,” he smirked.

First, he’d called you his human and now this? You could swear Ravn was going to kill you. Not with his fangs but his words.

The two of you spent the morning visiting many interesting places. Starting from the Globe Theatre, where Ravn showed you around like an expert, pointing out curious facts about Shakespeare that got you staring like a wide-eyed puppy. He also led you to a couple of lovely vintage bookshops and insisted on buying you some of Shakespeare’s plays you hadn’t read.

“But you have these already in your library!” you reasonably argued.

“Yeah, but I want you to have them. Besides, they’re different editions.”

“Ravn…you really don’t have to,” you were ashamed that he was spoiling you so openly.

“Y/N…please, let me,” Ravn whispered in your ear. It was like he was asking you to get him something and not the other way round.

You finally conceded and once the two of you left the bookshop, you found yourself clutching a paper bag with Shakespeare plays. You weren’t sure how to thank him properly for doing this for you and you couldn’t exactly offer him to drink from you in such a public place, so you did the one thing that came to mind. You lifted yourself on your toes and gave him a quick but heartfelt kiss on his cheek. Ravn seemed flustered and you could swear you saw his usually pale skin turn red for the briefest of seconds.

“Thank you,” you told him, your smile full of gratitude and affection.

“It’s nothing,” Ravn coughed and suddenly found the ground beneath you very amusing. You smiled when you reached the conclusion that he could get so easily embarrassed.

“It means everything to me,” you confessed. “No one has ever given me such a precious gift.”

“Come on, we still have many places to see,” Ravn grabbed your free hand and pulled you along.

You were lucky enough to see a couple of museums associated with famous British writers. The afternoon was dedicated to the more “basic tourist destinations” as Ravn called them such as the Big Ben, Tower Bridge and the River Thames. Everything was so grand that you couldn’t help staring at it like a lost puppy. Finally, as the sun was setting, Ravn suggesting going to the London Eye, which was most magnificent at night. Its lights shining through the dark, you were completely awestruck. Suddenly, you remembered a story you must have heard around the village.

“Wait, how did you survive throughout the day?”

Ravn laughed.

“Funny, it took you so long to notice. And if you’re referencing the foolish myth that the sun harms vampires, fear not, my lady, I am perfectly immune to daylight.”

You were relieved to hear that but a large portion of your mind was choosing to focus on the part where Ravn called you my lady, which was honestly making things to your heart that you couldn’t quite control or comprehend.

“I’m sorry for being such a dim-witted person,” you looked down in shame.

“You’re the brightest person I’ve ever talked to,” Ravn reassured you.

You faced him in the dark; the London Eye lights were giving his features a mystical, supernatural glow. He was so beautiful. You wanted to trace your fingertips down his porcelain skin and tell him how much you ached to touch him. It was insane, you knew. He was supposed to embody everything little kids were taught to fear, every dark fairytale, every warning whispered before midnight, to force the kids to finally go to bed or the scary vampire would take them away. But he was nothing like the stories. In the brief time of your acquaintance you’d seen nothing but tenderness. Who were you supposed to believe? These foolish myths or your own eyes, your mind and your heart?

“Shall we?” Ravn urged you to approach the London Eye, thus, breaking the spell he held over you. You followed him in a rush.

“Oh no,” you mumbled, pointing to a sign. “It says here it’s closed.”

Ravn smiled devilishly.

“When has that ever stopped me before?”

“Ravn…what are you planning?” you asked cautiously, but it was already too late.

His hands were already on you and the next second you had somehow ended up on top of the London Eye, with a view to the whole city, its lights making it look even more beautiful at night.

“This is…insane,” you gasped, holding tightly onto his shirt for support.

“Yeah.”

“Bite me,” you requested out of nowhere, looking into his dark eyes.

“W-what?” Ravn choked.

“Bite me, so I know I’m not dreaming.”

He laughed, amused by your reaction.

“If I bite you, we’ll both fall from here.”

You scoffed lightly.

“Thus with a bite I die,” you joked, slightly paraphrasing Romeo’s last words.

“Rawr,” Ravn teased.

You looked around the city street lights. Everything seemed so tiny from up here. And there you were, a human and a vampire on top of the world. It felt surreal.

“It’s so beautiful,” you said, completely stunned by the view.

“It really is,” Ravn confirmed, only you had no idea it wasn’t the city he was staring at…

🌙🌙🌙

Once you were back in Ravn’s castle, you walked to your room in a daze, still finding it hard to believe how you’d spent the day. But the paper bag with Shakespeare plays in your hand was the material proof that it had, in fact, been real. Ravn followed you silently and the minute your back hit the bed, he tucked you in gently.

“Good night, Y/N.”

“Aren’t you hungry?” you asked sleepily.

You were so exhausted from the journey and you still found enough energy to care for his needs. Ravn couldn’t believe he’d met such a selfless, precious human.

“I can manage a couple more hours,” he chuckled.

“You’ve given me so much more than I deserve,” you murmured weakly.

“That’s not true,” Ravn said. “You deserve all the stars and the moon.”

“O, swear not by the moon, th’inconstant moon,” you were still able to recite Shakespeare despite being so tired and it was only fitting, considering today’s adventures.

“What shall I swear by?” Ravn played along and you could feel yourself falling, not only asleep.

“Swear by thy gracious self and I’ll believe thee.”

🌙🌙🌙

You woke up to the smell of something delicious. Eggs? Bacon? What was this enticing odour? You hurriedly put on a robe and ran down the stairs and towards the kitchen. You were struck to find Ravn cooking human food!

“What are you up to?” you asked, sneaking up behind him. To your further astonishment, he hadn’t heard you, maybe because he’d been so focused on the task at hand.

“Nooo, you should go back to bed!” Ravn scolded you. “You ruined the surprise.”

“This all for me?” you inquired curiously and wrapped your hands around his waist, which made Ravn jump in shock.

“Duh,” he replied. “I can’t eat that.”

“So, you’re just fattening me up so that you can eat me later?” you admonished him playfully.

“Oh, no, you’ve uncovered my evil plans!” Ravn groaned dramatically.

“What shall we do, then? Do you think I’ll be so easily tempted?” you continued to joke around and ran your fingers down his back, making him slightly tense under your timid touch.

“I think,” he started. “That after you try my eggs, you’ll be begging me for more.”

“Yeah?” you giggled at the double entendre. “We’ll have to see about that.”

You were still trying to distract him from cooking when Ravn turned around swiftly, grabbing your hands.

“Don’t play with me,” he hissed, aiming to sound threatening but you were having too much fun to feel any fear.

“Why not?” you pouted adorably.

“Because you’re making it really hard for me to resist you.”

“You can have me whenever you wish,” you pointed out. That was your arrangement, after all.

“Not like that, I can’t,” Ravn whispered, almost too quiet to hear. Key word: almost. “The eggs are ready. Eat up.”

You didn’t question it, because you were too hungry to care what exactly he meant by that.

To be continued…

#oneus #ravn #ravn x reader #twilight #oneus fanfic #kim youngjo #fluff #vampire au #ravn fanfic #vampires #kim youngjo x reader #writing

44 notes · View notes

unlockthelore · 4 years

Text

Unbreakable Ties

Takes place after the conclusion of the Confession Tree and Misaki Stairs Arcs [ Chapter 8 (manga) and Episode 5 (anime ].

Yashiro knew when she embarked on the epic quest of trying to discern the true nature of Hanako that it would be a long shot but not this long. It felt as if she’d been at it for months when it was only a few weeks but he managed to evade every trap she tried to set. From asking about the little things like his birthday or where he liked to eat, what were his favorite places to go when he was among the living, or bringing up things about her own life — he either evaded or reminded her with a teasing grin that cleaning could be done at the same time as talking. Diligently cleaning the bathroom was one thing but she hardly wanted to let the subject go when it was this important. How could she be considered his friend when she knew virtually nothing about him?

It was unfair to him and doubly unfair to her because she wanted to know.

A withering sigh parted her lips as she pressed her forehead to the cool surface of her desk. The bell’s ringing echoed in her ears along with the chatter of her classmates as they vacated their seats to wander about the building for lunch or moved to sit in groups. She didn’t mind the soft whispering about her or the quiet inquiries on why she was sitting, and the lack of outbursts during class. After her last few mishaps, she developed a bit of a name for herself and it didn’t bother her so much as it drove her crazy about him.

Was it really so bad that she knew more about him?

Dread washed over her coolly and the darkness did wonders for her imagination. Questions swirling about her mind in a raging whirlwind as she made up answers for each one. Though none were as satisfying as simply hearing the truth from Hanako’s own lips.

His lips.

Eyes that reminded her of the afternoon sky, orange and yellow, upturned like the waning moon and bright as they focused on her. Narrowing as he leant closer with that wide, wide smile lighting up smooth unearthly pale skin, almost translucent in the evening sun and darkened a charming shade of scarlet. He was cold — naturally so because he was dead — but she wondered if he was close enough that they were nose to nose, would she feel any sort of warmth from his breath. Or when his lips met h—

Wait, what?! Her thoughts slammed to a screeching halt. Bolting upright with a sharp breath, her eyes meeting widened violet ones as Aoi leant back from her. Her hand, cupped along the side of her mouth as it was when she would impart a secret or one of the rumors that she loved to share, lifted to rest atop Yashiro’s head with a gentle pat.

“You’re a person with a thousand faces, Nene-chan,” she said, gently patting as Yashiro deflated with a soft whining noise. “What happened? Did your confession not go well?”

Ah. She totally forgot to tell Aoi about the confession and how it went. Though, how did she tell her that the boy that confessed to her was a ghost and it wasn’t so much a confession but a means to an end? Even the thought made her sick to her stomach. Her first confession and it was just for her job. Was this how it felt to be an adult?

“I’m guessing that it didn’t go well,” Aoi suggests sympathetically, smiling in that soft understanding way that she always did.

Yashiro’s head bobbed in an affirmative. She couldn’t bring herself to say aloud that the confession that she’d been looking forward to was an absolute farce. While it should have made her a little upset, she was more disappointed. Not only in herself but in how it made her realize that once again, she truly didn’t know anything about the person that she was interested in entering a relationship with. Had she really learned nothing over the month that she met Hanako?

Certainly nothing about him, she thought bitterly.

Warmth encircled her shoulders and she was gently pulled back into an embrace, a light weight settled on the top of her head and a squeeze around her shoulders. Lilac hair caught her attention and she belatedly realized that she was in a hug from Aoi and the squeezing in her chest was coming from her heart. Resting her hand over Aoi’s arm, she squeezed and leant back into the hug, closing her eyes tightly.

“It’s alright, Nene-chan,” Aoi whispered, giving another squeeze and another part of Yashiro’s heart cracked. Why was she so nice? “There’s another rumor that you haven’t heard, interested?”

“Another rumor?” Yashiro asked quietly, unsure if her heart could handle another rumor that was centered around love or finding happiness this soon.

Aoi pulled her arms away, settling her hands on Yashiro’s shoulders and tipping to one side to regard her with a warm smile. “It’s about the red string of fate,” she began. Likely seeing the desperation and sadness on Yashiro’s face, Aoi quickly backtracked. “Not necessarily about love although a few people do see it that way.”

Yashiro sighed softly. It wasn’t Aoi’s fault that the Confession Tree rumor was a total bust. Nodding slowly, Yashiro offered her best smile and decided to put the thoughts of Hanako to the side for now. “Alright, what is it?”

“There’s a rumor that in the Art room, there’s a drawer that can’t be pulled out and was said to be enchanted by Musubi no Kami.”

“Musubi no.. Kami?”

“The god of matchmaking, love and marriage,” Aoi explained cheerfully. Yashiro gave her another withering stare and Aoi waved her hands dismissively. “Don’t worry about that part, Nene-chan, listen to this.”

She leant down with her hand blocking her mouth, whispering close to Yashiro’s ear. “They say that if you try to open that drawer, something from inside will attach a string to your finger and you’ll be able to see who you’re truly meant for.”

“…Who I’m truly meant for?” Yashiro echoed back, glancing at Aoi from the corner of her eye.

Aoi nodded and Yashiro pressed her lips together, averting her gaze to the window. That sounded far too good to be true and a bit convenient considering what happened yesterday. Was it another kodama or another spirit attempting to ride off the coattails of the Confession Tree myth? Regardless, she should try to investigate it to make sure that it didn’t turn out to be another trick. She wasn’t sure if she could handle facing Hanako —

Who you’re truly meant for.

“So, does that mean you can find out if someone really likes you or not?” Yashiro asked as Aoi returned to her seat, watching her intently while she checked on a few of the plants on the window sill.

Aoi’s lips curled into a smile as she hefted one of the blooming petals onto her finger. “So they say,” she said in a sing-song voice, letting it fall as she pulled her hand away.

All of Aoi’s rumors thus far had proven to be true to some extent. What was keeping this from yielding some sort of answer to her? If not about herself then something about Hanako. Perhaps she could find someone that he was connected to before. Though why would anyone who was around him when he possibly attended their school still be there? Unless they were older and still a teacher. Still.

How did she know that he attended this school? Ah, it was so confusing!

“A woman with a thousand faces,” Aoi giggled, raising her hands weakly as Yashiro tried to poke at her arm as payback. “You should go while we’re still on break, Nene-chan, and try to eat some while you’re at it.”

Yashiro nodded enthusiastically, throwing her arms around Aoi’s shoulders and hugging her tightly. Hearing an indignant cry of outrage that likely came from Akane as she pulled away and Aoi smiled up at her, patting her arm before ushering her away with her bento in hand. Bypassing the glasses-wearing boy, he gave her a slight pouting look while Yamabuki tucked his arm around his neck and chuckled softly, saying something and raising his hands as Akane tried to elbow him in the stomach.

Now that she was thinking about it as she prepared to leave the classroom, looking back at all the students talking to one another and interacting, everyone seemed to get along really well. Even though she stuck out as the oddball who occasionally made disruptions — everyone seemed to get along well with her too.

It was nice to know.

Smiling to herself, she turned away and hurried out into the corridor, running as quickly as she could without garnering the attention of the teacher or some of the monitors. There were whispers but when wasn’t there as she made her way to the old school building’s third floor and the bathroom where he was waiting. Sitting on the ledge with one knee pulled to his chest, his head resting against the wall as he gazed out the window. His body almost translucent in the sun’s glare and hat tipped low over his eyes. Yashiro hesitated with letting the door close behind here, worried that she would interrupt the moment.

His haku-joudai floated aimlessly in the air, their red and green centers lightening and darkening slowly.

“Are you going to come in?” Hanako asked, turning his head slowly to look at her, the sunlight catching off his choppy dark hair haloing him in a soft golden hue. “You’re going to look weird just standing there and staring at me. Were you waiting for something? An invitation perhaps?”

Yashiro stiffened up as she looked down then up at him, shuffling inside and letting the door close behind her. “I practically work here, so why would I need an invitation, Hanako-kun?”

Hanako chuckled warmly, his eyes closed as he grinned widely. “Well, that’s true.” His eyes opened and his smile fell as he stared at her. “You haven’t eaten yet?”

“Hm?” Yashiro shifted her hand, recognizing the weight of her bento and panicking as she hurried over to sit near the ledge, undoing the handkerchief. “Oh no, I was a little busy…”

“Oh?” Hanako drawled. “And with what? That kid?”

“That kid…?” Yashiro tipped her head to one side, running through the short list of people that she was around that cross-referenced with the ones that Hanako interacted with. “You mean Minamoto-kun?”

Chills ran down her spine at the soft peal of laughter echoing close to her ear and she squeaked, covered her ear with her hand, eyes wide. Hanako, upside down with his hand holding down the brim of his hat to keep it from falling to the floor, levitated next to where she was with his cheshire grin.

“What’s wrong, Yashiro? You’re really jumpy today. Did something happen?”

Despite his teasing tone, his eyes crinkled at the corners, oranger than yellow and she was vaguely reminded of the boy beneath the red rays apologizing to her with scarlet stained cheeks. Her heart skipped a beat and she swallowed thickly, picking up her bento before it slipped off her lap.

“I thought you would tell me, Hanako-kun, you heard about the rumor haven’t you?”

“Rumor?” He drifted down until he was parallel to to the ground, his arms crossed and chin resting atop of them. “What rumor exactly?”

She wasn’t sure if he was humoring her or actually asking but either way, it was a way to sate her curiosity over what it meant.

“There’s a rumor about a strange drawer in the Art room, if you open it then you can find how other people really feel about you, and…” Her voice trailed off as his eyebrow slowly raised, the skepticism heavy in his eyes.

Feeling the heat rising to her cheeks, she picked up a clump of rice and stuffed it in her mouth to keep from having to say anything more. They hadn’t spoken about that day for some time and his apology was still fresh in her mind just as he likely remembered all of the crushes that she harbored before. It was embarrassing to say the least and the silence hung heavy between them.

“So, you’re eating in the bathroom during your lunch period and want to investigate about how a relationship rumor…” Hanako pointed out with a soft beat in between the points, each one a stab to her heart. The way that he said it made her sound so pathetic, did he really have to be that blunt? With a soft hum, he shifted upright and his shoes tapped against the floor. “Alright, it should be worth looking into.”

He took a step away from her, the temperature rising in his absence as he walked toward the door. Sitting on the floor, she stared after him with wide eyes and tilted her head to one side, her chopsticks brushing against her lip as she lowered them to her barely-touched bento.

“Really? That easy, Hanako-kun?”

Sliding open the door, he paused in the doorway and glanced over his shoulder, the curl of his smile visible. “Of course, it is part of our job after all…” He narrowed his eyes, his irises redder than orange and the curl of his smile made her heartbeat stammer. “Unless you had other interests, pervy ra—“

Yashiro shrieked, chucking her closed bento at his head and he turned around hurriedly with wide eyes and a flustered look that reminded her of the young boy he was. Catching it neatly in his hands and sighing, he held it up with a pout.

“You shouldn’t waste food, Yashiro,” he scolded, holding the bento up in the air before spying some of the Mokke parading from one of the stalls. “Actually, maybe they would appreciate it more.”

The Mokke looked up, spying the colorful lunch box and cheered when he held it down to them. Surprised and crying out in their small voices when Yashiro snatched it from him with a pout.

“Hanako-kun,” she shouted, narrowing her eyes as he danced out of her grasp and hurried down the hall.

Like this, it felt like everything was normal and that day under the confession tree didn’t happen. Her bento swinging by her side as the Mokke that were denied their treat piled on her head and shoulders as repentance, Hanako-kun floating listlessly at her side.

“About that rumor you heard of, there’s a little more to it,” he said, and Yashiro looked up at him.

“There is?”

Usually Aoi’s stories were spot on although they didn’t include the truly supernatural aspects that she found either frightening or confusing.

“The entity inside of the drawer doesn’t show you whether someone likes you or not, it shows you the bond that you have with another person,” he said, holding up his hand, translucent in the light streaming from the windows. He bent his pinky finger and waved it around a bit. “Most people believe the legend is just about the red string, but that’s one out of several.”

His fingers splayed out and he curled his ring finger. “Friendships.”

Next he curled his middle finger. “Enemies.” This earned a snickering chuckle out of the Mokke and a soft scolding from Yashiro for the indecency.

He curled his thumb. “Acquaintances. People you don’t really know yet, like your crushes.” Yashiro’s indignant squeak and her swatting at his arm made him float further away with a chuckle.

Looking at her own hand, Yashiro curled her fingers as she mapped out the various relationships but was left with her index finger pointing outright. “What about this one, Hanako-kun?”

“Hm?” He glanced at her then sighed thoughtfully, floating closer to peek at her finger, his face dangerously close to her own. “That one would be for confidants.”

“…Confidants?”

Hanako flexed his own index finger. “People that you can trust, ones that you can confide in and share things with, more so than you can a friend, a lover, or a family member. Although they could fall in those categories,” he pointed his index finger at Yashiro and snickered.

Yashiro rolled her eyes and tried to elbow him in the side and he drifted further away. With him laughing and carrying on, sh was able to direct her attention to her finger. What would she be to Hanako-kun if the spirit affected them both?

A confidant?

A friend?

A lover…?

Wait, what was she thinking? She tried shaking her head but the Mokke atop cried out in dismay and she quickly stopped. Hanako glanced back at her confusedly and she patted her cheeks, trying to give her best disarming smile. He arched a brow but shrugged and continued drifting forward, her shoulders drooping with a sigh. The disturbed Mokke poking her cheeks with their ears(?) and huffing at her movements. Her soft apologies joining the distant chorus of voices as they walked.

The Art room was thankfully vacated but before she could take a step forward, Hanako held out his arm in front of her. His teasing smile was gone and his eyes narrowed, slowly drifting to look at her from the corner.

“Be careful not to touch anything aside from that drawer,” Hanako warned, setting his feet on the floor as he reached out to open the door.

Yashiro tilted her head, somewhat surprised when the Mokke seated there didn’t squeak. It wasn’t until she glanced at her shoulders that she noticed they were gone. When had they disappeared? “Why?” She asked when she looked up at him.

He said nothing for a long while, staring at the door intently. His eyes far more yellow than orange and glaring at the door as if he were preparing for battle. Then all at once, his stormy expression cleared and he smiled impishly. “It would be rude to touch someone else’s things,” he said with a shrug and a soft whistle as he slid the door open.

Paint fumes filled the air and Yashiro fanned her hand in front of her face before peeking inside. Whomever was in there last left quite the mess. A wide canvas set in the middle of the room with several others along the walls, drying supplies and brushes left in water while others were in their proper container. Tarp laid out across the hardwood floor splattered with paint, some puddles still drying she noticed as she stepped closer and saw them still shining on the fabric.

“Don’t dawdle, Yashiro,” Hanako called from the other side of the room, perched atop of a shelf with his legs crossed, his hand lowering to the knob of one of the drawers, lightly knocking. “Musubi-san, Musubi-san, are you home?”

Yashiro held her breath, half-expecting something to happen when a half-choked laugh and Hanako’s trembling shoulders deflated the tense silence. “That wasn’t funny, Hanako-kun.”

“Yeah, yeah, but you believed it,” he chortled, holding his stomach as she approached. “Alright, careful now…”

Her heartbeat quickened, pounding loudly enough that she could feel it in her ears as she reached out, her fingers grazing the knob and curling around it. Slowly pulling it open and a myriad of colors filled her vision as threads of all colors sprang from the drawer. It was like a rainbow painted in front of her eyes and she felt something tight cinch around her fingers, staggering backward with her hand cradled closer to her chest as the threads quickly swarmed back inside the drawer and it slammed shut.

Opening one eye, she glanced around then looked down at her hand. A number of strings were tied to her fingers, the base and the knot following different paths that were shifting. Wiggling her fingers, the threads moved with her and she brushed her thumb against one but her finger passed through it.

“They’re… invisible..?”

“Mhm!” Hanako chimed in, and Yashiro tipped her head back to look up at him. “Just because a bond can’t be seen doesn’t mean that it isn’t there.” He hovered over her, upside down once again with the bill of his hat held tightly between his fingers and eyes crinkled at the corner with a wide smile that made her heart stammer. “Want to see where they go?”

“S-Shouldn’t we stop the rumor first?” Yashiro asked.

Hanako hummed softly, glancing at the drawer then about the art room with a faint shake of the head. “No, it’s not causing any harm and considering that the strings are transparent, it must not have a lot of power…” He waved his hand dismissively, toppling forward to stand on his own feet. “Which means that it’s a small fry.”

Out of the corner of her eye, Yashiro could see the drawer tremble as if the entity inside took offense to the accusation. She smiled sheepishly, gasping softly when a cold presence encircled her wrist and began to lead her out of the art room.

“Now come on, come on. Let’s see where your strings lead.”

Yashiro’s eyes widened and she wanted to say that this wasn’t the point of it but he was right. Her strings were leading somewhere. Looking down at her other hand, she startled when she noticed that her bento wasn’t there.

“Did I leave it in the art r—“

“The Mokke took it.”

Her eyes narrowed, face stony as she faced forward, dedicating her afternoon to finding the little rabbit-like thieves and reclaiming her lunch. Although she was certain that it would’ve been eaten up by then. Though this was odd. Walking with Hanako holding onto her wrist, staring at his back as he moved confidently without a word. And he didn’t need to hold onto her wrist. She would have went of her own accord. So why was he?

The closer they got to the newer building, the closer the voices of her classmates sounded and Hanako’s hold drifted from her wrist. An aching loss filled her chest from the touch’s dwindling but it would have seemed strange if she was just walking with her wrist held out. The strings were floating aimlessly through the air, connected to some of her classmates that she went past. Most of them connected by her thumb, simply acquaintances. While there were a few connected to her ring finger.

Holding up her hand as she walked, narrowly avoiding some of the students approaching from the other side of the hall, she saw one that was connected to both her thumb and middle finger, following the two strands colored white and blue respectively, to find a group of girls cooing over Minamoto-senpai.

“What color are they?” Hanako asked, floating by her side.

“You can’t see them?” Yashiro muttered softly, disbelief wrestling in her chest as she looked down at her fingers then the distant form of Minamoto-senpai.

Hanako shook his head. “Well, I could if I tried hard enough but that would be an invasion of privacy. Right? So tell me, did they connect to him? Your undying love?”

Yashiro curled her fingers tightly and lowered her hand. “No…”

The thread that was stretching from him to her was the same soft yellow connected to her own thumb. A dull aching throb in her chest as she clenched her fist and hid her hand behind her back. Hanako’s cheshire grin diminishing as he floated by her side.

“Yashiro?”

She always knew that Minamoto might not know her but she didn’t think that he only thought of her as an acquaintance. Although it was to be expected. She didn’t even know her name. The justifications only made the pain stronger and she tucked her chin, staring down at her feet.

“Yashi—“

“Senpai!”

Her head jerked up as the crowd of girls parted for Minamoto-kun. Minamoto-senpai seemed distressed and was waving his arm but the group around him was carrying him further and further down the hall. Minamoto-kun hurrying toward her with bright eyes and a smile, reminding her every bit of the puppy that he acted at times. The soft green and orange cords connected straight to him.

Friend and Confidant.

Her eyes softened and she smiled as she looked at him. “You shouldn’t run in the hall, Minamoto-kun,” she scolded gently, tapping her finger against the top of his head as he stopped in front of her, bracing his hands against his knees.

“Sorry, sorry, I just wanted to tell you th—“ He paused, his gaze drifting to Hanako who leant in closer to her cheek, eyebrow raised. “Wh— Why are you—“

To others, it might have looked as if he were yelling at nothing or at her and the whispers started. She laughed nervously and braced her hand around his arm, pulling him a bit closer. “Minamoto-kun, there’s nothing there, see? No bugs.”

He seemed confused then quickly caught on. “O-Oh right, sorry.. There’s just been a lot uh.. further down the hall.”

Hanako seemed unimpressed by the excuse but some of the other students gravitated further to finish their lunch elsewhere, vacating the corridor quickly. He drifted between them as they both sighed and gave them a nudge in the sides.

“I don’t appreciate being called a bug,” Hanako said, fixing Yashiro with a narrow-eyed stare before looking at Minamoto-kun. “So, what did you need to say?”

“Oh right. Uhm, there’s a new rumor going around about the red str—“

Yashiro held up her hand, wiggling her fingers, the threads shifting. “We’re already investigating it, Minamoto-kun.”

“… You are?”

She nodded.

He pointed at Hanako who floated beside him impassively. “With him?”

“Yes.”

He turned toward Hanako with a venomous glare only to receive a cheshire grin. “W-Well then, just wait for me here, okay Senpai? I’ll go a—“

“We won’t have long to figure this out before the break ends, Minamoto-kun, “ Yashiro carefully denied, patting his shoulder. “And I wouldn’t want you getting yourself into danger on my behalf.”

Minamoto-kun’s bright blue eyes went wide and shimmered. “Senpai,” he whispered softly. Hanako’s hand sliding between their faces, obstructing his face from view and Yashiro glanced at him.

“Sorry about that, but we really should get going, sooo…” His hands settled on her shoulders, a tingle running down her spine as he pushed her down the hall with a smile. “See ya later, kid!”

“Oi! Where are you taking, Senpai!? Oi!”

“You didn’t have to be that cold to him, Hanako,” she chided once they were out of his earshot, following the rest of the way to her classroom.

“Well, we only have a limited amount of time before the strings run out. We have to be efficient,” Hanako gave a sagely nod but with the way his hat bobbed, he seemed all the more childish. She sighed half-heartedly.

“Nene-chan!”

Looking up, Yashiro smiled widely at the sight of Aoi hurrying over to her and throwing her arms around her neck. The deep green and orange strands were connected to her and the same ones were traced back to Yashiro herself. Her chest swelled and she hugged Aoi fiercely, smiling warmly at the soft squeak and peal of laughter buried against her cheek.

“What’s wrong, Nene-chan?”

“Nothing,” Yashiro said, stepping back and holding Aoi’s hands in hers. “I’m just happy to see you is all.”

A pretty shade of pink dusted Aoi’s cheeks but a chill crept down Yashiro’s spine as she heard a grinding noise, glancing over Aoi’s shoulder. Yamabuki holding Akane at bay as he tried to come closer, muttering something about Aoi-chan and glaring daggers.

A pale orange strand connecting to her, Yamabuki and Akane. Did the intensity of the colors mean anything? Her own with Minamoto-kun were a soft shade, just as they were with Minamoto-senpai, while Aoi’s was intense. Did that signify the intensity of their bond?

Then what was it for —

“So did you go looking into the rumor, Nene-chan?” Aoi asked knowingly with a teasing lilt to her words, her hand cupped around her mouth as she leant closer.

“W-Well, kind of… but there wasn’t really anything to go off of,” Yashiro laughed nervously, scratching her cheek.

“Really? That’s too bad… oh, where’s your bento?”

“H— O-Oh, I guess I must have left it. I’ll go get it.” She said, stepping backward into the hall then sprinting off.

“Try not to be late, okay?” Aoi called after her and she cried out an affirmative, running as quickly as her legs would carry her.

By the time she reached the third floor of the old building, she was out of breath and sighed. It was nice to know where she stood with the people closest to her but she still didn’t get to see Hanako’s. Wait, had she even take a chance to look at his hand? Maybe it was there.

Sliding open the door to the bathroom, she heard the soft tinkling of bells and saw Hanako sitting on the window ledge with Yako across from him. The fox spirit looked over as the door opened then huffed, turning her head away and her nose high.

So she was still mad about being called “Fox-san”, well that was to be expected. Sneaking a peek at Hanako’s hand, her eyes softened. On his hands, there was nothing.

“… Hanako-kun?”

“Hm?” He looked up at her and smiled softly, her heart aching at the sight. “What’s wrong, Yashiro? Did something happen?”

“The rumor…”

“… What? Did you not find out what you wanted to?”

Why did it feel like he was deflecting? Why wouldn’t he just answer her honestly?

“Sometimes the answer you get isn’t the one you wa—“

“Where are your threads?”

Hanako stopped in mid speech, his eyes widened and Yako looked between them, her tails swishing side to side. Yashiro’s hands clenched to fists at her sides and she could feel the strings loosening from around her fingers. Did he get how it felt? Not one of her strings connected to him at all, even when she tried to look for them. And he was right there with her.

“Didn’t you know, Yashiro?” He tipped back the brim of his hat as he leveled a patient gaze on her, one that was much older and knew much more than she could possibly comprehend in this one afternoon. “When you die, you sever your connections with the living. So anyone I would have been connected to, I no longer am…”

If her heart was shattering before then it was completely in pieces now. His connections were all severed? Because he died?

How long ago was that?

How long did he know that?

Why did he go along with all of this if —

“Then…” She hesitated, her voice trailing off before she forced the words past her lips. “Can you not make new ones?”

Hanako’s eyes widened by a fraction and the soft choked gasp parted his lips. He blinked once then twice and Yashiro held her breath as she waited for the answer. His parted lips opening wider, catching her attention as she waited for the words that would steal her breath away.

“… Who knows?”

He pressed back against the wall, his hat tipped low and leg lazily swinging, shoes lightly scuffing the ground.

“Eh?”

“I said who knows,” Hanako repeated, shrugging half-heartedly. “You and I have a bond now, and like I said before.. just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean that the bond isn’t there. So cheer up, okay?”

Yashiro pressed her hands to her chest and the heat rose to her face as her lips curved into a wide smile. She clenched her hand around her closed fist, the threads vanishing before her eyes but it didn’t matter. Her gaze lingered on him and she felt the warmth building in her chest dispelling once the bell rang.

“Ah! I have to hurry back. Sorry, Yako-san, Hanako-kun, I’ll be back later!” Hurrying back, she let the door close and rushed off to class. Her footsteps carrying down the corridor as the sounds of the students returned.

Silence reigned in the bathroom and slowly, Yako turned to look back at Hanako as he sat quietly with his hat tipped low and his leg lazily swinging.

“I never took you as the type to lie, Honorable Number Seven,” she said, tipping her head to one side, the bells softly ringing as they brushed against her ears.

Hanako’s voice, soft and lilting as he spoke to Yashiro, deepened as he tipped his hat upward. His eyes oranger than gold, almost seemed scarlet in the low-light. “What are you talking about, Yako?” He shrugged, raising his hands with a soft sigh. “I didn’t lie.”

Yako huffed, pointing one paw at him. “You said that once you die, you cut your ties with the living but you have ties of your own, don’t you?” She set her paws together and looked toward the mosaic. “Ties that you’re not willing to cut with those living and dead.”

The air grew colder and if she noticed the drop in temperature, she didn’t say. But the hairs on her tail stood on end and she shied further away from him.

“Number Two,” Hanako murmured, his haku-joudai drifting closer to him. “You’ve been hanging around Number Five too much, haven’t you?”

“Enough,” she admitted, hopping off the ledge and padding across the floor. Her paws lightly tapping against, tails swinging with every ring of her bells. “His boundary is still intact, you know. And you haven’t answered my question, Honorable Number Seven.”

Hanako chuckled, crossing his arms behind his head as he sagged, letting his propped up foot rest against the other end of the wall. “Because you didn’t ask one, silly fox.”

Yako’s ears perked and her tails lashed out, energy ricocheting off the walls of the bathroom, unable to pierce nor affect the boundary. “Why did you hide your bonds from Yashiro Nene?” She asked pointedly, turning to look back at him. “Isn’t she your beloved human assistant?”

Hanako’s eyes narrowed and he lifted one of his hands up, staring at his fingers translucent in the red rays. “You should know, Number Two,” he intoned softly, wiggling his fingers, a soft shimmering hue surrounding them as the base and knots began to make themselves known. “The stronger a bond is, the harder it is to cut it.”

Yako huffed, facing forward and continuing her leisurely strides. “So, you didn’t tell her so she wouldn’t become attached, Honorable Number Seven?” The door slid open for her and she walked out, turning to head back to her stairs. “How kind of you.”

The one red string connected to his finger, he knew where it led. But it wasn’t so much of a string but a thick cord that would have been nigh impossible to sever. And the one it connected to was currently in her next class, chatting happily with one of her friends.

“And cruel,” he muttered, letting the strings fade and his hand fall to his stomach.

#toilet bound hanako kun #jibaku shounen hanako kun #hananene #hanako #yashiro nene

114 notes · View notes

pelagaios-a · 7 years

Text

do not reblog;;

so as some of you may or may not know ( depending on how long you’ve been following me here ) in May I went on closing night to see the Lightning Thief: the Percy Jackson Musical with @wisdomwalked !!! it was absolutely amazing and totally worth the trip into NYC for the day and I have a post [ here ] about some of the stuff that went on. with the release of the soundtrack ( which I literally got in the mail Saturday --- thank you preorder ) I wanted to talk about the songs and their parallels / etc to the content in the Lightning Thief ( book 1 ). below I am going to have a lot of links ( I have put together the lyrics for the album ) and quotes and stuff so I guess bare with me here and I hope I make sense lmao.

to start off I’m going to skip a lot of the other songs since I wanted to address the song [ Good Kid ] and the following related songs [ Their Sign ] / [ Son of Poseidon ] and [ The Last Day of Summer ]. which you may be like, kat ??? what do they share ??? well, let me tell you.

to start off in the song Good Kid ( x ) we get the lyrics

six schools in six years, been kicked out of every place everything I ever do is wrong never find where I belong everybody on my case

the same old story, the same old song don’t act up, don’t act out, be strong

I keep my head down I keep my chin up but it ends up all the same with pack your bags Percy, you’re always to blame

and I say this because in the song Their Sign ( x ) we get

he show'd no sign that he ever existed no sign he might actually care my mom raised me all on her lonesome when I would reach out, no one else would be there !

which we get compounded with this set from Son of Poseidon ( x )

seems my good intentions always crash and burn everything I try to do will fail never once will I prevail going wrong at every turn

then as I have said [ before ] Luke hijaks the tune to good kid in the Last Day of Summer ( x ) and tells Percy

it doesn't pay to be a good kid a good kid a good son

Good Kid is literally the first song that comes to mind for me from this album --- possibly because it was the only release before the musical --- but it touches on a lot of aspects people forget about Percy within canon and brings to light a lot of his own thoughts and insecurities. I know I’ve said it before but he really does not have the best self image even at the most opportune of times let alone the fact his life is a trainwreck more often then not. Percy spent his life growing up alone ( Grover is literally his first friend --- think on that ) and was commonly the target of bullies. not only this, but he’s referenced being called stupid / problematic / not worth someones time by adults in his life ( I imagine teachers alongside the verbal abuse Gabe subject him to ). in his mind ??? the only person who cares about him is his mother and even then he’s rather worthless due to the fact he makes life so, so much harder for her then she deserves. all these lyrics ESPECIALLY the lyrics throughout Good Kid reference a child who is looking for someone --- anyone --- to accept him. I mean the damn song ends with

I swear I never stole anything I never meant to hurt anyone I swear, I swear that I’m a good kid a good kid, who’s had a bad run

and all I need is one last chance to prove I’m good enough for someone

he literally just wants a place to feel accepted and Camp Half Blood offered that but then they told him to leave --- remember that Percy did not have a choice in this quest or he would have been killed outright by Zeus. he’s twelve and sent on a quest everyone thought he would fail. explain to me how that helps ??? answer: it doesn’t ( “ no one ever tells me that they’re proud no one asks me, Percy, how'd you’d like to come around and stay” ). so I say again: these four songs alone touch on a lot of how he thinks of himself that gets breezed over since, as Percy is the narrator and plays off his own problems, fanon / the fandom / most people tend to brush over or ignore. he literally is looking for acceptance but does not expect any. Percy says he reached out but ??? it’s referenced in the past. it’s not something he does anymore. how literally fucked up is this.

and then there’s the [ Prologue / the Day I Got Expelled ] which follows the first chapter or so of the book. some of the stuff said just ??? really upsets me due to the connotations ( x ) which like, I am not getting into the big breakdown of this song right now since there is a LOT to talk about but I will bring up some lyrics:

look! I didn't want to be a halfblood I didn't ask to be a hero seeking grace being a halfblood, it's scary it mostly gets you killed in very nasty ways

now as most of us know, Percy has the Iconic™ line “look, I didn’t want to be a halfblood” at the start of book 1. to start the show off, though, they played a little deeper into it. that line up there I think very well plays off my [ hero headcanon ]. Percy never once has reference liking the idea of being a hero and right here he states at the beginning this is nothing he wants, nothing he wanted, and he really wishes this was not his life. the song then goes on to bring up other stuff but man this part to start it off. which ??? sets the mood for the rest of the musical in a way, I think. like, sure it had lighthearted and funny moments, but there’s always this thought in the back of your head that Percy never starts to like it or enjoy it or anything. every moment is something he wishes weren’t his, in a way. not to mention they don’t downplay his character in the slightest --- we get a good look into his mind from a perspective that starts to show it more outward then inward ( because let’s be honest, Percy brushing it off let’s us brush it off and the musical didn’t allow much room for “brushing off” ).

this all is one of the huge reasons I find the song [ Strong ] so important. not only is it a song entirely dedicated to Sally and Percy but it’s a song about how you’re strong because of your differences which ??? I think for a lot of people even outside the pjo universe would find important. like ( x )

normal is a myth everyone has issues they're dealing with and there's a place you'll need to go where you belong where the things that make you different are the things that make you special special like your father yes Percy, you are special

like food the color blue all the things that make you, you are the things that will make you strong so be strong

like, I don’t know whether I say it or just think it anymore ( ignoring the people who get my Percy feeling dumps ) but so much is out there coming at him from every side and this song puts a lot of focus on 1. the fact he needs another voice to remind him he’s more then what other people say ( “what was he a screw up to? sorry mom, if I was only normal... “ / “ mom if you're weird, you're weak” ) because he’s so hard on himself 2. just how important ??? Percy’s mother is, most especially to him --- she is one of his major reasons to keep going --- and 3. it again shows more of his self image. Sally Jackson is literally the sweetest most important character in this whole series and this song does a good job of summing that up. Percy at his point has one friend he thinks is ditching him and no prospects and he just failed again. in his mind whats the point? the song here is just.... god I don’t even know how to word how important this song is across the board.

anyway, I know I didn’t include every song on the soundtrack ( there are 19 total --- while all include Percy some are just about other characters which I don’t think ??? I’m going to discuss here. like [ Another Terrible Day ] / [ Put you in Your Place ] / [ My Grand Plan ] / [ The Tree on the Hill ] or [ D.O.A. ] which, while play into Percy’s journey and whatnot, are not about him or his growth in a way. I may touch on them slightly later ??? but definitely not right now.

tada tho here’s my brief pjo musical Percy synopsis I guess...

#do not reblog #this took me eons to write cause i sat here like #writing out the lyrics to these songs to start off with #then i kept flipping through my book which i had to get back from my friend for this #then me wording what i wan t e d #g o d #this is the eons long headcanon post i needed to feel revived #♆ ╱ ❛ headcanons.#this is just an overview im going to do in depth stuff later #cause thats.... a lot of writing and to much for one post #idk i wanted smth basic to start rip me #:'))))))))))))

3 notes · View notes