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blindedguilt · 1 year

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//So that essay I did. I ended up writing VERY VERY thinly veiled DOD fanfiction for the prompt which was basically “Write a first-person initiation into adulthood based off one of the stories in the textbook and a comparative essay between the two after” and so I ended up bullshitting the essay only reading the stories after I made the narrative lol i got a 96/100 anyways //I figured as it was about everyone’s favourite bilf of the bog that I’d post it here, but... //Reminder: This is my first time really solidly writing in first person since I was like nine, so it may be a bit rocky. First person is NOT my area of expertise lol //And ofc obvious trigger warnings for mentions of paedophilia and stuff (Nothing explicit though, of course!) //Enjoy!

“...And we’ll be married. You’ll see.” “I never saw you speak to each other.” “I said, you’ll see.”

So the banter had gone by so frequently then, and now stood I alongside his wife and his child, and mother on the other side, staring at the curves of his face and how it had thinned, still soft and child-like yet aged and grown in such a way none could have explained by any normal means. Perhaps, then, it was in the sight of those definitively unchanging eyes and how they gleamed the same way under the sun that had caught my attention, and in turn, his, and he turned to look back with some strange sadness that I had averted my gaze in some feeling between either abashedness or fear of any hint of understanding to be held. “...Why her?” “Her? Leonard, look at her.” “I do see her.” “Don’t you? You hardly even looked. Well…” “She… Is kind, isn’t she?” “Yes! And one day, I will make her my bride.” And so the village men had gone and lined up near the forest break on the army’s cart, the showing of the backs of their unnaturally cut hair settling an odd knot in the stomachs of I and who I was certain, the other few men who stayed behind. Orbas’s hair had been a similar length of the day I met him, so I had recalled, though the ends were splayed and framed that once pale neck in such a way that reminded me of the small leaves of a flaxen bush or perhaps a spring tree, though there was one small, favorite piece that strayed off the side of his face — His son, such a small child, had already inherited it — And so he had frequently kept tied and twined with the same strip of leather worn by men and women here. For Orbas, it was no more. I had thought to pick up his son at that moment; for his sake, his father’s sake, and as well my own. Near four and almost the same image as his father, that I had at times troubled myself in remembering his mother, and to see and grant his father’s own personal wishes of caring for that stray hair in his place (So as I had when we were mere boys), tying the silk strands in place, to have “him” so completely and totally reliant on me, it was comforting. The feel of the warmth from such a small body, held in my arms and placed against my own, the grip of small hands pulling against my cloak, was comforting. It was wish fulfillment, in a way. The circumstances in which we had met were entirely on Orbas’s own will. How he darted so confidently up to the smithing corner with frail legs that seemed ready to snap under his own weight, and I, feeble and feminine in mind as he was in body, having apparently gained some semblance leaning towards haughty self-bravado thought, ‘What does this mad fool think he’s doing? Who does he think he is?’ and was only further driven in such convictions when he spoke as if we had never once been strangers before. For Orbas, all it took was a single conversation — And still, for all the good I’ve come to speak and feel for him, I think not once have I changed in my belief that he was completely mad that day in having tossed all pride aside to speak to the mollified mute of Atheren.

He had dragged me from my crafts, introduced me to friends who would soon become my own, and had not once ceased for a day after to visit me in my practice there. Father was pleased at first, until he wasn’t, as I had gone from smithing and not speaking to speaking and not smithing, and following his harsh, booming rebuke towards the shaken lad as I could only offer my embarrassed gaze lowered towards the dirt, and bits of green with hints of metal in-between, he would come every other day instead. When we went out, with others or by ourselves as we later had, it had always been Orbas there to lead the way, the conversation, to give directions and warnings unless I knew better in my caution, to where I would try to speak — But I was merely a follower. I have always been, a fact with no shame in admitting and a fate I would think to show no more than indifferent contentment towards. “Why me?” I had asked. Another walk. “We never spoke before.” “Can you keep a secret?” I nodded. Something in my heart fluttered and leapt with those words. “Well… Haven’t you seen yourself?” Something must have been spoken in my silence as confusion or hurt in a way he didn’t need to look over his shoulder to see, prompting him to explain. “You never spoke to the adults or children your age, but only the animals and infants lost by their mothers. You panicked, but always found them home. We saw it. We all did, then, you know.” “...” “When you saw a fly being eaten by a spider, you would take a stick to it and try to ward it off. If you couldn’t reach, you’d find somewhere else to go that you didn’t have to hear it. Your father yelled at you because you had trouble baiting a fish hook. Other children… Normal boys, at least, we saw it and laughed. You, already bigger than the rest of us and yet hardly able to look anyone in the eyes. The girls fancied it, though, called you a gentleman and all, and so one day I thought, ‘I wonder if there’s someone he’s trying to impress with all this?’ and I began to get curious.” “No. I… I’m not trying to impress anyone.” “Well you certainly are when you follow every stupid order I give you.” I stared at the back of his head. A few more steps, and he peered over his shoulder at me, whatever look I wore causing those soft lips to curl up into a laugh. “There has to be someone.” “... There isn’t, honest.” “Say who. We can help you, Leonard, and you’re set to be wed before any of us. Haven’t you always spoken about wanting children? Yours and mine can be friends, and your sons will be older and teach my sons all about everything, just like us!” Something in those words had risen and tightened the back of my throat, and I spoke as I did back then, before I met him — Unable to look him in the eye, look at him at all, and my voice had grown so faint the sound had barely reached my own ears. “It is a secret. That is all.” … And as the years passed, that secret and I grew up and spent our years together, the “Secret” got married at fifteen, and I was sixteen, except he had grown out of being a “Secret”, and once I did, I thought to myself, “I am free” — But I never did find a wife. When the friends of my childhood pointed them out, “That one’s pretty”, “I spoke to her, she is interested in you”, I only could only ever offer another soulless nod along to the increasingly agitated and growing band of married men, all who later had their sons I loved and adored just as I would have my own, and some had daughters, too. In that same year Orbas had gotten married, I moved on to another secret picking berries in the woods, another fixation skinning their knee on the ground, but after him, I never knew it as I did then — “Such a thing would be impossible,” I always told myself — And I continued life as a blacksmith’s son, a follower, and a coward to the war that brought itself to our town in search of new hands for slaughter. “Security” had been the word spoken to me that day, who chose to stay behind (The child incapable of baiting a fish hook or accepting nature in near all its form), in contrast to him, whose bravery sought the peace of the world, the heads of red-eyed monsters, all the glory and fame reflected back the small village of Atheren, even at risk of his own family, foraged and built. A family, one woman and her four year-old son, unable to fend for themselves. Once again he acted in a way that any madman might, entrusting his sole unmarried friend to care for a wife and son in his absence, and then again, perhaps not mad — Explicitly had he stated his trust with a laugh in that I had come “This far” without any luck, and furthermore went to cite our own, personal trust we had built in each other — He knew they would be fine because he simply knew me. Always the protector, and where I never did find a wife, I made my home among the children of the village. And as the cart started away through the woods with a forward jerk, and Obros, the sweetness grown out of his face, looked over his shoulder at me, his tiny son held in my arms, and smiled with that worried look, I smiled back. I gave him a nod in reassurance, and he slipped through that canopy of pine and birch and away towards war beyond. It’s alright now. Now, I am fine. He’ll be alright. He’ll be alright. It’s okay, because now, I’ve finally found someone. Someone I love, just as I loved you. It was a secret.

#||Relevant||#{/I wanted to post this yesterday but ended up playing DOD1 instead and fell asleep immediately after at 3AM....}#{/Would this count as that one remake of his novella I always talked about writing? MAYBE; ACTUALLY???}#{/it was never intended to be but now that i think about it; i always did intend it to be something somewhat like this}#{/Perhaps less written in a retrospective tone as much as silhouettes into different parts of his life; but...}#{/The crush on his best friend's son was (gonna???) be present in that too. XD}#{/Orbas is the kid mentioned in his novella; his friend he was crushing on}#{/ofc; it wasn't so much his crushing on his friend as a kid that bothered me in the novella as the direction they took it in...}#{/I thought it was pretty neat; if anything!!! and with certain ~details~ about Leonard's character told in Mag Neg (heh heh) I wanted to}#{/make him a bit of an asshole... sure; he DID mean well 80% of the time but when he was a kid he was a condescending jerk LMAOOOOO}#{/His name was taken off the demon Orobas; who's said to appear as a.... Lemme check}#{/From the site used to find his name: He appears both as a small unusual looking dark-haired man or a boy with medium blonde ring curls}#{/So there ya have it. XD}#{/I hope it was alright!!}

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honorhearted · 2 years

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@avictimofthejazz | continued from (x)

With both feet firmly planted on the floor, Ben moved to close the window just as Street started shouting at him. It was understandable, given the circumstances -- he, himself was still a bit muddled from everything -- but it was only when he caught a glint within the moonlight that he realized he was staring down the barrel of a g.un.

“Holster that!” Ben hissed, immediately jerking up his hands. “What do you do, sleep with that thing?”

“You… think someone is watching your place so you decided it was a good idea to break into my apartment at three in the morning? You’re lucky I didn’t s.hoot you!”

“I don’t know, okay?” he growled. “I panicked... I’m unfamiliar with the area, and yours was the closest apartment to my lodgings.” Exasperated, Ben grumbled, “If I’d broken into A.gent Scott’s room, he really would have s.hot me.”

“Alright… let’s start over. You think someone is watching your house, so you decided that the best plan was to drive across town to my apartment, climb in my b.edroom window, almost get s.hot, and likely draw whoever is following you to my place instead of yours?”

Ben scowled, not appreciating the other man’s tone. “Did I not just tell you that I panicked? I didn’t say this was a genius plan -- I didn’t say this was a good idea. I just acted, and am quickly regretting said action, because yes, it is not one of my finer moments, and yes, I should have re-evaluated my options before taking off into the night.”

Street, naturally, was not impressed by his explanation. “What’s the next step in your master plan, Tallmadge?”

“Will you stop mocking my not-plan?” Ben snapped. “If it eases your mind at all, I didn’t see anyone following me...I took several back turns and the long way across town, and no one continued after. We should be fine for now.” Dropping his face into his hand, he sighed and rubbed at the bridge of his nose. “You said so yourself that you’re such an expert on this town. Are you sure that you aren’t being tailed, too?”

At this point, Ben wasn’t even sure if he’d accurately assessed the situation. After days of round the clock observations, jabbing for information, and a general lack of sleep, it was very possible that he was unknowingly i.njecting p.aranoia into the mix.

“Look, just...maybe we should take your car back to my lodgings,” Ben suggested. “We can park a couple blocks away and scope the area. If I’m right, we might have a lead. If I’m wrong? Well...” He shrugged, weary in his exasperation. “I’ll let you lump me one. How’s that?”

#avictimofthejazz #an unwanted following #v: modern au #//lololol ben's genius 3am thoughts take him to #not-so-genius places oof #ofc this is also me since my brain is just NOT cooperating this week *rolls away*

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zebrafiz · 2 years

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had to close sim requests for a bit! ive got about 10 left so after those are done they’ll open back up 🫶🏼

#i am stressing myself out HARD over like… dressing these sims djshjdkem #ik i said to give me an overview of their style/color scheme and that’s what i want rly!!#it’s just actually quite harder than i thought it would be djejsjdnsbdj #it’s very challenging to branch out into new styles when ur so used to certain ones already #so I’m put these pieces together but then im like “does this actually look good? will ppl look at this and go ‘man wtf is this sim wearing’?#so i restart #ik it’s not like… THAT serious but i want them to look good and i feel like im not experienced enough in fashion for this LMFAOOOO #(just me overthinking at 3am dw yall)#so yeah . im still doing them ofc i just want to focus on these last 10 #*personal

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kirishwima · 1 year

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nothing sobers you up quite like anxiety

#i was out w friends drinking. an unholy amount of alcohol #and i saw my coworker at like 3am who was at work today when i had my time off #and ofc i asked how work went today and he said it was 'a lot and very busy'#and i asked what he meant and he said a lot of stuff happened that hell fill me in on on monday #and my heart has palpitations bc my first thoughts are #a. did smth serious happen? and b. did smth happen with any of my patients?#i know i left no loose ends before my time off but its still. stressful #he explained a bit so i KNOW its ok #and if anything truly serious happened hed just tell me regardless of my time off #but its still stressful orz #anyway im home now and its 4am #and trying to tell my brain to shut up so i can sleep #burrito talks #delete later

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dokyeomini · 1 year

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i could go to the gym right now......

#it's almost 3am but i can't stop thinking #how do you even deal with a homophobic grandma #i didn't wanna ask her any probing questions so i just left it as is #also we were like about to leave #but like... she was the last person in my family that i thought would have these opinions #after my sister ofc #like damn....

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gingersxng · 3 months

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Stepbrother

pairing: f!reader x Mingi

Summary: from being an only child living with her dad and his new wife to the next day having your new stepbrother rearranging your insides

Genre: smut 18+

Notes: stepbrother mingi, dom!mingi, sub!reader, lots of kissing, cursing, fingering, oral m.receiving, big dick mingi, unprotected sex (always be safe), cum eating, cream pie, bulge kink, may have forgotten something I wrote this at 3am

Words: 1.7k

you were just a normal college girl living a kinda normal life at home with her father and his new wife. you had pretty good grades but didn’t have a lot of friends so you usually spent most of the time alone. it was always a relief to come home to your room and crash down on your bed.

you had fallen asleep as soon as you came home and woke up two hours later by a gentle knock on the door and your dad telling you to come down for dinner. you rubbed your eyes and stretched out your body before you sat up and did a fast check on your phone, your dad had tried to call you several times and sent a text message telling you to put on some nice clothes and then he had a surprise waiting for you. you furrowed your eyebrows wondering what it could possibly be. well maybe you should get your ass up and put on some clothes. as always you opened your wardrobe and just stared for a couple minutes because you never had anything to wear. after a while you remembered you got a new black skirt and your paired it together with a black top and some silver accessories. you took one last look in the mirror before you headed downstairs. you were met by your dad, his wife ofc and a guy.. you felt your heart drop down to your stomach. “there you are y/n! we’ve been waiting for you sweetheart” your dad greeted you. the tall blonde guy in your hallway gave you a little smile which made your cheeks blush. “this is Mingi, my son” your stepmother said patting him on the back. “you’ve never met each other yet so we thought it was time” your dad looked at you with a big smile on his face. you gave Mingi a shy smile and went into the dining room along with the others.

your parents talked the most of the time while you and Mingi were quiet, you could feel his gaze on you and it gave you butterflies. your dad never told you his new wife had a son so this felt so strange somehow. Mingi were one and a half year older than you and you would lie to yourself if you said he wasn’t cute cause omg. “Mingi’s gonna move in with us” you almost choked on your water when you heard what your dad just blurted out. “t-that’s great” was all you could say. you felt your cheeks getting hotter and the butterflies went crazy now. you’ve only known about your so called stepbrother for an hour and had now become a blushing mess.

after dinner your parents went into the living room to watch some late night tv and Mingi went to grab some of his stuff. you had went back to your room trying to take in the new information and you seriously didn’t know what to think. you were sure things would get easier when you got used to all this but right now it felt like your whole life had changed. you could hear someone walking up the stairs and you knew exactly who. it was Mingi and he went by your room and into the room across yours to unpack. he raised one eyebrow at you before he disappeared. gosh isn’t he dreamy you thought to yourself. you decided to remove your makeup and change into your sleepwear before heading to bed, you couldn’t stop thinking about him and it bothered you like crazy.

the next day you woke up around 1pm and you’d got a message from your dad. they had went to some friends and would be back in a few hours. you put the phone down on your nightstand and went to the bathroom to wash up. when you got downstairs you heard a deep voice from the kitchen. “morning” you almost jumped a bit cause you had completely forgotten that you weren’t alone anymore. Mingi sat at the kitchen island eating a bowl of cereal, he’d just woken up too. “good morning” you said a smile forming on your face. there was some awkward silence for a bit, you sat yourself at the opposite side of kitchen island facing Mingi while you ate your breakfast. yet again you could feel him watching you and your heart skipped a beat. “sooo.. y/n huh? that’s a pretty name” his deep morning voice vibrating right through you. “well, thank you” you blushed. “doing anything today?” he asked as he gave you a little smile. dang that smile could make you melt like a popsicle. “nothing special, I guess I’ll watch some tv” you replied while putting your dishes away. Mingi couldn’t help but sneak a peek down to your ass that was covered up by a pair of very short sleeping shorts, your ass cheeks falling out of them.

you put on your favourite show and made yourself comfortable on the couch. Mingi decided to join you cause he didn’t have anything better to do and that would be a good excuse to be with you more. you were watching an adult romance series on Netflix, you loved those kinds cause it always gave you butterflies. Mingi was sitting beside you and he was on his phone almost the whole time. you felt yourself heat up when a hot scene came up on the screen. you tried to keep yourself calm but you couldn’t help but press your thighs together a little. a loud moan came from the tv and caught Mingis attention. “what the..?” was the only thing he said. he turned to you and couldn’t help but notice your state. cheeks flushed, thighs pressed together and bottom lip between your teeth. a smirk formed on his lips looking down at your thighs. “you like this show huh?” he whispered into your ear. you pressed your thighs harder turning to face him. he placed a hand on your thigh giving it a light squeeze earning a little whine from you. his hand travelled to the place you needed him the most, he began to rub small circles on your clothed clit. your eyes shut tight at the sensational feeling. your wetness were leaking through your grey sleeping shorts, Mingi licked his lips at the sight. “damn so wet already” he chuckled. you bucked your hips onto his hand to get some friction. he pulled his hand away and you whined at the loss of contact. “I think we should continue upstairs since our parents could come home anytime” he said taking your hand and dragging you upstairs.

when you got into your room and locked the door you pushed him down on your bed climbing on top of him. you smashed your lips onto his, you opened your mouth welcoming his tongue inside. his hands grabbed your ass cheeks giving them a hard squeeze making you moan into his mouth. you started to place kisses down his neck then lifting up his shirt to place more kisses onto his torso. his low groans made you clench onto nothing. Mingi watched as you went further down to the waistband of his pyjama pants, you brushed your hand over his bulge earning a moan from him. you pulled down his pants revealing his big cock leaking precum at the tip. your eyes widened seeing how big he was. he smirked at your reaction. you didn’t waste any time and got down on him starting to lick up and down his length before putting him into your mouth. the tip hit the back of your throat making you gag, he brushed your hair away from your face. “fuck, just like that” he threw his head back into the pillow. you used your hand at the base of his cock while licking the tip. Mingi fought the urge to fuck up right into your mouth at the feeling. you could feel his dick twitching in your hand so you stroked him faster and put him into your mouth. he let out a cracked moan as you felt him release down your throat. you went up to his face to kiss him letting him taste himself.

he pulled down your shorts and dragged his fingers up and down your folds collecting your juices, never breaking the kiss. he pulled out his fingers and rolled you over onto your back placing himself between your legs. his tip teasing your aching hole. “pls Mingi..” you whined. “so needy darling” he finally pushed himself inside slowly to give you time to adjust. you could literally feel your eyes roll back into your head. you arched your back letting out a long moan, you’d never felt anything like this before. as he began to thrust faster and deeper into you your moans started to sound like something from a porn movie. you put your hand over your mouth to keep quiet cause you wouldn’t want to take the risk of your dad hearing his daughter being fucked by her stepbrother.

Mingi watched as his cock went in and out of your wet pussy. he pushed down his hand on your lower abdomen feeling how deep he was in you. he hit your g spot over and over again and you could feel yourself clench around his cock and a knot building up in your lower belly. Mingi sped up his pace feeling how close he was too. “damn…fuck” he threw his head back, his big adams apple bulging out as you felt him paint your walls white. not long after your knot loosened and you milked all over his dick. he leaned down to give you a kiss, cock still inside you.

“guys we’re home! and we got takeout with us!”

shit!

“we better get down there before they suspect anything” you said smiling. Mingi pulled out grabbing a towel to get you cleaned up. “since we can’t date I guess we’ll continue to fuck instead” he said with a playful smirk on his face. you just rolled your eyes at his comment. you both put on some clothes and went downstairs.

“what have you two been up to today?” your stepmom asked. you felt yourself blushing yet again. “we’ve been talking and got to know each other a little better” you said looking at Mingi. “well that’s great! I hope you’ll get close soon” she said proudly.

oh if she only knew.

#ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez imagines #ateez smut #kpop smut #mingi ateez #mingi x reader #mingi #song mingi #ateez scenarios

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spilledmilkfkdies · 2 years

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Seeing comments on YouTube floating around of people saying Sebastian is Valtor's SON because something something "dad is trapped" or whatever, which just made me think about how cheap it was to make Valtor, sorry, Val-TOR his last name. Like this is what they can do now, they introduced a Valtor and cowardly left a door open for future characters, stories etc. Not exactly the first time they did it either 👁👁

Commit or go home besties, where are your balls when it matters. Also Valtor is infinitely hotter as a first name, I'll keep saying it

#episodes are written a day before shooting #a funny little surprise for everyone #sebaltor (derogatory)#3am thoughts ofc #anti fate the winx saga #netwinx #''please valtor valtor was my father call me sebastian''

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g-xix · 9 months

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Pregnant | Harry Lewis

Hey girlies, here's a Harry oneshot for the W2S girls, requested by someone on Wattpad... Ik Whoetoshaw has alr done way longer + more in depth sort of oneshot for this so creds to her ofc. Here's a cute pic of Harry to prepare you tho:

Very fitting!!! Anyways: Content: Pregnancy scare, female hormones, 2k wordcout CW's: Pregnancy scares + mentions of abortion

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The two bright red lines glared up at me angrily.

I couldn't believe it.

Slapping a hand to my mouth, I felt as though the life around me were distorting, those bright two lines indicating the new life forming in my stomach.

"Y/n? You all alright in there?" Georgia's voice called from outside the bathroom. I felt my hands shaking, I couldn't comprehend it was really true. Tears began burning in the corners of my eyes, distorting the dizzying LED's around me. There was commotion around me- a door slammed open, a familiar face with a look of horror as they looked at me- lay across the bathroom floor- I couldn't tell you what happened in the space of ten minutes, but before I knew it I was sat opposite Georgia in the kitchen- steaming mug of tea in my hands.

She looked at me sombrely, a hot mug in her hands as well.

"So, when are you gonna tell him?" She questioned, raising her mug for a sip.

"Who?"

"Harry."

Oh God. I had to tell Harry. Boyfriend of five years, best friend, considerable soulmate.

And somehow the thought of telling him still made me pale inside.

We'd never talked about babies before... Pregnancy or even babysat for a friend! And having a baby meant a lot of responsibility we hadn't considered. We both had far too much on our plates. I had a nine-to-five, he had all of his YouTube biz, and we barely even had time or thought for holidays together, anymore.

"Soon." I gulped, palely.

...

"We're going out for drinks tonight- Mia and Faith coming along as well, you wanna come?" Harry mentioned casually,

"Oh, yeah sure I-" I choked on my breath as I remembered, coughing and burning my lungs as I hacked up a bit of inhaled saliva. Harry's hand found my back, slapping it as though he were trying to hit the cough out of me. "O-on other notes, I think I'll pass."

"You're not one to pass on meeting up with the girls, you got a bit extra work?" Harry questioned, face showing concern as he tried to read my expression.

I turned my back to him, facing the fridge to avoid eye contact as I responded dejectly.

"Yeah." I spoke shortly. I could feel the burning in my lungs slowly sinking in my stomach and sitting like a volcano getting ready to erupt. Every morning, throwing up had been getting worse and worse. It felt as though no matter what I ate (or didn't eat) for dinner, every morning the sickness hit with the same knee-weakening magnitude. I was sure Harry was asleep most mornings when I threw my body over the toilet bowl, given I woke at 3am with the sickening urges.

And I didn't want him to see me throw up all over the kitchen after missing out on an opportunity to see Faith and Mia again.

"You want me to stay? I don't mind staying in tonight if you wanna spend some time-"

"God's sake, shut up Harry." I snapped "Just go without me- I've never stopped you before, have I."

An uncomfortable silence settled between us, tension in the room thick enough to cut with a knife.

I didn't mean to shout at him- I don't know why I snapped.

"S-sorry." He softly spoke, voice filled with downcasted sadness. His voice only made my heart ache more, and I turned to try and meet his eyes- babble an apology- but as I turned to try and meet his soothing blue eyes, I was instead met with the door closing behind me.

The pull on my heartstrings making the tears well in my eyes was clearly too close to the stomach- as I felt my inside swirling, bile building in my oesophagus.

Before I knew it I was back at the toilet bowl, hands clasped around the lid with my knuckles going white as I had whole body shakes. My eyes squeezed shut, throat burning as I coughed up residual acid that lingered in my throat, spitting out all that amalgamated, nauseating fluid in my mouth.

And then after the coughs, it all began dawning on me again.

No more going out for drinks.

No more spontaneous planning.

No more irresponsibility.

Those coughs began developing into dry heaves, tears trickling down my cheeks as my breathing became erratic, broken cries and raw sounds coming from a throat I couldn't even believe was my own.

My body shook with each cry- weak and unstable- and only trembling more as I realised I wasn't just shaking myself. That tiny life form- a consequence of my carelessness- shook with me with each choked sob.

A vibration from my pocket was pulled out with quivering fingers, spotting Georgia's name.

I swiped on on the accept button, lips sealing together as I tried to zone into Georgia's voice.

"Hey girl, you doing alright?"

"M-maybe... Why, has s-something happened?"

"Not really, just wanted to know- have you told Harry yet or are you still-"

I felt that anger building inside me again. It wasn't her fucking problem- easy for her to pressure me- try and advise me and tell me I ought to tell him despite having zero fucking knowledge on what it feels like-

"GEORGIA, FUCK OFF I DON'T NEED THIS SHIT-" I threw the phone out of the bathroom door, hearing it hit one of the bedroom walls. "FUCK. OfF..."

My voice breaking was the last straw before I began losing it hysterically once more. My throat burnt as more acid crept up my oesophagus and found its way into the toilet, tears streaming down my face like a river now- chest rapidly rising and falling as I clutched at my head- everything making me light hearted.

The lights went off after that.

Pulling the pulley down, the lights went off. I didn't want to be seen. I want to see the reflection of a broken woman who I knew was myself. I cried in the dark instead of facing myself and what had happened.

Until I lay back flat against the cool tiles. I had gone through the motions. Dramatic sobs until there was no more liquid and I could only dry heave- to now- simply staring up at the ceiling, eyes tired and breathing steady with the exception of an occasional erratic choke.

It could have been just a few minutes, or a few hours that I just lay there.

Head empty, stomach empty, body feeling completely light. As though I weren't even alive.

I felt like shit.

I shouldn't have snapped at Harry.

I shouldn't have shouted at Georgia.

I shouldn't have thrown my phone.

I'll tell him when he comes back, Georgia, I spoke internally. Promise. For you.

My mind flicked through the variety of ways he could respond to hearing it. Eventually I filtered it down to a few.

Best case scenario: He's too drunk to understand it and just falls asleep, unable to comprehend what I'd said.

Worst case scenario: He completely sobers up and tells me to leave. Get out, blocks me on everything, does everything in his power to never see me again.

Of course, there were also a few alternatives:

Maybe he would start packing and get ready to spend the night at a friend's to sober up- not believing what he'd heard.

It was a possibility he might pass out from the news.

Or he could agree to support me, but only if I agree to abort it- him- her- whatever it was.

That final thought was sickening. I couldn't abort it. Of course - I physically could have it aborted... But I couldn't do that to something living. A part of me. I didn't like the thought of something growing inside of me- but that didn't mean I was going to be cruel enough to kill it. No matter how poorly Harry reacted.

A jangle of keys outside the door was enough to get me onto my feet- rushing back into the bedroom as I heard the front door opening.

"Y/n?" His voice called from the front room.

I jumped onto the bed, finding my phone and running my finger over the dent it had left in the wall. That would need fixing as well.

"Y/n? You around?" Harry's voice peeked around the door, finding me sat on the bed. Hands held in lap, phone clasped between shaking fingers. I looked at Harry's head, hair scruffy, and the smile on his face sincere. And the lack of redness in his eyes and cheeks gave me the impression he hadn't drank - or at least he hadn't drank much.

"You don't look like you've gone out." I commented on Harry's appearance. He smiled as he entered the bedroom, shutting his door behind him.

"Decided to skip." He responded, leaning his back against the door, holding a plastic baggie in his hands.

You should tell him. The voice spoke in my head. I knew I should. And there was not better time than now to tell him.

"I have something to tell you." "I have something to tell you."

I lowered my head and chucked slightly as the two of us let out laughs, our synchronisation amusing despite the fact it felt as though my heart were going to explode in my chest.

"I'll go first," Harry offered, though I shook my head.

"No, I want to-"

"I can- I don't mind, I mean-"

"No, seriously, Harry. I've got something more... uhm, important."

I could feel tears welling in my eyes as I went. The dip in the bed and the heavy arm that made its way around my shoulder indicated Harry at my side. I couldn't hold it in as again, I felt a choked sob make its way from my lips.

"I'm pregnant, Harry-"

I cut myself off with another pathetic sob, my head burying into Harry's shoulder as he wrapped his other arm around me, cradling and rocking us back and forth. My head ached as I let myself cry onto his hoodie shoulder, my hands weakly grasping onto the soft material as the second batch of tears for the day slipped down my cheeks.

I wiped my nose, pulling away to look at my boyfriend after the worst of the sobbing was over, my tired red eyes meeting his own pacifying blue ones.

"I know." He softly spoke, his lips curling up slightly with a small smile as he watched my expression drop to blank slate instantly.

"W-what?" I stuttered, the words not resonating as I suddenly felt so light it were as though I weren't even there. His eyes curved into little crescents as he giggled.

"I know, Y/n, I know, I know, I know." I closed my eyes, breathing in and out deeply, wanting to pinch my arm. Was I even awake?

"Please explain what the hell is happening," I asked with a short laugh, still not really processing what was happening.

"I figured, Y/n. After all the morning sickness-"

"I thought you were asleep during that?"

"I heard the end of your throwing up and toilet flush in the morning... I feel worse I always woke up too late to help you through it. But I noticed your morning sickness, not coming out to drink, the unusual mood changes..."

"Yeah, sorry for snapping at you." I chuckled, and he just rubbed my back. "So... what now?"

"Well, I went out and I got some things for us- sorry, for you." He pulled the plastic Tesco's bag from the side of the bed, digging through it. "I got you some Häagen-Dazs- the praline flavour because I know it's your favourite- and these flowers because Faith advised to get those on the phone- oh, and also-"

He pulled a fluffy piece of clothing and gestured for me to take it. I couldn't tell what exactly the item was, but as I pulled it apart, I realised it was a tiny little baby one-piece, so small it was barely the side of my head.

It was perfect. He was perfect. My boyfriend, my baby daddy, My Harold. I felt as though I could cry again, but refrained as I turned to face Harry.

"So you're... okay with having a baby?"

"...Yeah." He began nodding his head in self-support. "We can do this."

"You aren't mad or anything?"

"Mad?" He looked aghast at the thought. "Bloody hell, no! I'm actually kind of... excited."

I couldn't believe it. A laugh fell from my lips, realising there wasn't any problems. That Harry was fine with all of it. And he supported it. Me. We were going to be fine.

"Fuck, I love you Harry."

He connected his lips with mine and I couldn't have felt happier as the fireworks in my stomach exploded, lips curling into a smile as I realised:

Maybe it was all gonna be okay.

-----------

Hope you enjoyed reading!! Feel free to interact- whether that be a comment, vote or follow! Requests open, feel free to submit what u wanna see... Much love!!

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galacticseonghwa · 7 months

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Hey hun!

I just spent a good chunk of my mortality giggling and kicking my feet at your BF!Chenle texts, and I wanted to know if there could be a part 4 please😭 👉🏾👈🏾 obviously please don't feel pressured ♡

Zhong Chenle bf texts pt.4

hi my love! ofc i can do that! i hope you like these ones <3

INCLUDES: swearing, pet names, suggestive content, 3am thoughts, it’s all over the place icl😭, kms used as a joke so WARNING there

a/n: not proofread

#galacticseonghwa #nct dream #nct #chenle #zhong chenle #nct chenle #nctzen #chenle fic #chenle texts #chenle smut

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judeswhore · 6 months

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Jude waking you up in the middle of the night, because he has a jet lag so he can’t sleep and he reminded himself of this very funny joke that Trent has told him. so he's shaking your shoulder delicately, but you're not waking so he decides to whisper something in your ear and leave sloppy kisses on your neck. and when he sees that you're awake, he's so proud of himself, but sees that you're annoyed and so he has a pout on his face and says "I've been gone for a week and you're not even missing me and my kisses". but then he finally tries to tell you the joke, but he's laughing so hard that it takes him some time. and you hope that it will actually be funny and worth waking up, but then it turns out to be some crappy joke that only him and Trent understand

he’d be so offended and claim u just didn’t love him properly bc ur all moody that he’s woken u up but it’s literally 3am and u don’t see why he needs to?? but he’s been whispering ur name for a few minutes and u haven’t even moved, back pressed firmly against his chest still while he’s slotted behind u bc he might say u haven’t missed him but the way you’ve clung to him all night wld say different. that isn’t working so he’s shifting a little so he can press his mouth to ur neck and shoulder, wet kisses finally pulling u from sleep and all u can do is grumble and squirm away from him, swatting his leg to get him to stop and now he’s fully pouting bc “i’ve been gone all week and u haven’t even missed my kisses?” and ur rolling ur eyes and pulling away from him again, mumbling something abt how it’s the middle of the night and you’ll let him kiss u as much as he wants tomorrow. but ofc that’s not good enough for jude so he’s cuddling up behind u again all “remembered a joke i had to tell u” and ur telling him surely it can wait but he’s saying it can’t bc he’ll forget again. so ur giving this little huff and turning around to face him and he just thinks u look so pretty he has to kiss u properly :(( but then he’s attempting to tell u the joke but he can’t stop laughing and u give this little giggle bc his laugh is so infectious even when ur half asleep. then he’s finishing the joke and ur laying there all??? bc that doesn’t even make sense to u and then he pulls the “u just had to be there” care and now ur even more???? bc why on earth did he wake u up for that?? telling him off a little for it and he’s pouting even more now bc he thought you’d laugh but also he’s starting to feel bad for waking u up. so he’s mumbling a little sorry and pulling u back into his arms and telling u to go back to sleep but now u feel bad bc u have missed him and u don’t want him to think u haven’t just bc his jokes are shit. so ur shifting to kiss him softly, holding him so close and muttering that he can tell u all his jokes tomorrow but rn u just want him to hold u while u sleep bc u missed falling asleep cuddling him

#hey jude :)

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mothdustts · 1 month

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A sorta rant about Sam from Stardew Valley and his 4 heart event cuz i cant sleep and hes my wee lil goober

So apparently sam is a pretty underrated bachelor mainly due to his behaviour and personality in heart events that can cause him to come off as “immature and too young” which yea it’s understandable. So this is coming off from a perspective of a almost 20 year old uni student who really find Sam rather interesting and relatable.

So seems like a lot of people tend to point out his 4 and 10 heart events (sometime 6 even) as to their reason on finding Sam like a bit distasteful. I wanna talk about his 4 heart event cuz the more i looked back onto it, the more it hits me and find him very relatable in terms of personal experiences. So lemme bring up his 4 hear event and give yall my personal lense of it.

The 4 heart event has Sam trying to get you a snack but dropped an egg by accident, which caught Jodi’s attention.

And of course Sam seemed distressed about it, and so is Jodi’s reaction as she got mad about something as minuscule as an egg crack on the kitchen floor. We as the player has to be the one to tell Jodi what happen (where you can either tell what actually happened or choose to lie and say you dropped the egg btw)

Pretty much the best option is to lie and say you did it, and Jodi forgives you and plays it cool ofc. Jodi gives off the same reaction when you tell the truth and said that Sam dropped by accident.

I’m guessing that’s because it’s YOU who’s telling her what happened rather than it coming from Sam, which of course Jodi would be a bit more forgiving so she would cause a scene in front of their guest. Had you not been there and its just a casual day in their household, it’s likely that Sam will get hella berated and scolded by Jodi over an egg.

It seems very subtle I guess but Sam not responding to Jodi’s question may be the cause of previous experience with causing minor accidents around the house and getting scolded by his Mom. He may also seem really scared to respond with the truth, fearing his mom’s reaction hence relies on you to do the talking.

And personally, this had happened to me a lot growing up, with my mom literally scolding the fuck outta me if I ever made a minor mess or an accident around the house, so it did impacted me growing up anf maturing into adulthood. I remember as a kid I had to lie a lot because i fear that she would shout at me or worse hit me and yikes that got a wee bit dark didnt it bruh.

Sam may have not mature out in that department and of course it would have to do with his upbringing, being raised by Jodi and having an absent father as well which i’d say makes him hard to be mentally matured.

So yea i guess that all i gotta say and since this is all just speculation and basically my interpretation of this heart event, do take it with a grain of salt.

I might make a revised version of this to make it more cohesive and shit, i mean like i literally am writing this at 3am so meow :3

Y’all are welcomed to reply or reblog to open up a discussion and id love to hear and chat with you about your thoughts and insight about this hehe :D

goodnight gois!!! especially to you Sam stans out there!!!

#stardew valley #stardew sam #sdv #sdv sam #i am very normal about this boy #oooo so normal #intense brainrot rahhh #ive literallt only played this game for like a month now im already so attached to sam

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gojoroui · 1 month

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what do your moots remind you of?

tysm for turning this in nonnie, i was really exited to try this <3 & the fact i thought i had NO MOOTS when i literally have like 33 💀

@wvnrqs — ribbons & bows, old newspapers, pretty swans, tulips, bubbles during a summer day, vintage books

@ode2rin — cats, plushies, desserts, pillow sheets, clouds during a sunset, slice of life vlogs

@yuzurins — chirping birds in pretty meadows, bubble tea, spring mornings, green tea, flowers, plants

@okkalo — golden coins, rainbows, duckies, cardigans, soft breeze at night, lakes, cherries

@noomon — the sun, diaries, simple yet beautiful things, love letters, projectors, mini fireworks

@yoisami — serenity, raindrops falling down a window, youth, modeling posters, strawberries, bunnies

@mikareo — twinkling stars, lattes, romance k dramas, museum of arts, recording studios, eclipse

@rinzsu — instagram posts, cookies, snowman, masquerade balls, photo albums, the beach

@hanrinz — stars, k-pop concerts, snowflakes, headphones, mini skirts, candles on a rainy day

@rosequarzo — japanese folktale, lucky money, headphones, fantasize by ariana grande, toast, waking up at 2am for a snack

@adoregojo — modern universities, polaroids, black & white manga, hairclips, milk tea, bonnets

@riekiss — winter wonderland, snow angels, jewelry, dolphins bumping noses, mini skirts, slowly plucking petals off a flower

@popponn — frogs ofc, matcha, perfectly healthy & straight grass, keroppi, bootcut jeans, chanel soap

@rewh0re — autumn leaves, wooden instruments, music notes, greek & rome mythology, poetry, sacred monuments

@y2kuromi — sand castles, colorful ice cream flavors, perfect pair by beabadoobee, staying up to talk with friends until 1am, pretty seashells, butterflies

@pokkomi — glitter & sparkles, staring at clouds, fantasy genre, cargos, hello kitty, angels

@yunymphs — models, laufey, coquette aesthetic, anything gucci, attractive girls, money

@520cafe — sparrows, cats chasing after yarn strings, thirsty by aespa, picture frames, rice with soy sauce, playlists

@etoiile — lipstick, fashion, staring at the starry night sky, french cookies, milk, daisies

@moonswolfie — coffee, studying with a candlelight during a rainy day, scarves, autumn breeze, biscuits, puppies

@kyoghurts — saturn, friendly aliens, lipstick stains on a white shirt, peach eyes by wave to earth, carp streamers, chalk

@kxttqi — lilies, sunrise & sunsets, lion cubs, melting candles, strawberries, pretty instagram posts

@kaiser1ns — book shelves, j-pop, cheesecake, birthday streamers, lucky money, tigers

@rninies — aventurine, unforgiven by le sserefim, pochacco, mangoes, flip phones, figurine boxes

@iluvies — kaomoji, koi ponds, expensive restaurants, red velvet cake, pottery, bunnies that have their nose scrunched up

@lovedazai — sweet bananas, lily of the valley, bouquet of roses, the smell when you walk into a bakery, prom nights, fairytales

@scopuo — jjk theme song, video games, dvds, tote bags, japanese apartments, thrift stores

@culturity — watching edits at 3am, stargirl, cleared remix by lilithzplug, nokia phone, laces, ramen

@myuroll — my melody, rubber duckies, alice from wonderland, koi fishes, cake rolls, the feeling when when someone gives you a compliment

@noirflms — flower petals, cherry blossoms, coquette clothing, hoodies, pinterest whispers, apocalypse by cigs after sex

@wishmemel — wish me mell, chocolate covered strawberries, the moon, pretty nails, new york at night, mcdonald’s chicken nuggets

@saelique — ocean waves, san-x, doves, kindergarteners (bc ur cute & fun ^^), friends to lovers trope, headphones, staying in bed for 5 more minutes b4 school

@yeritos — pudding, iced coffee, pearl necklaces, mesmerizing color palettes, skipping rocks, mary jane shoes, lamp

#letters ꕤ ˚₊⊹

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