#Humans are space orcs

[niqhtlord01]

Humans are weird: Family Drama

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To Abarxsis one’s family was something sacred and meant to be treasured. It contained those who were with you from the first moments of your age and would join you along your journey through time longer than any friend or colleague could. It was a feeling he held onto greatly and shaped the foundation of who he was. It was a trait he was glad to see shared amongst many humans as they too sought out family to such an extreme that they would pack bond with anyone or anything to obtain that sense of unity. Yet it was with some great surprise that when he inquired about his human lovers’ family they would refuse to even mention them.

 Whenever the topic of family was brought up their mood would shift like a switch had been flipped and all the joy and expression of them would bleed away and be replaced with a cold chill. Abarxsis learned that it was unwise to bring up the topic, but he still could not let it go until he knew why they were so against their own kin.

One night, Abarxsis was watching human entertainment while his lover slept and saw a strange situation unfold. The protagonist, like his lover, also was estranged from their family and refused to meet them. So the other characters surprised them by inviting their family over without telling them so the two parties could reunite and make peace once more.

This notion of restoring unity gave Abarxsis the idea that he could do the same for his lover and so he set out to track them down himself. It took several months of messages and follow ups until finally he had tracked down their family. When he mentioned that he wished for them to reunite they were thrilled at the prospect and agreed to meet them for dinner.

The day finally came and Abarxsis had taken his lover out under the pretext of a romantic dinner. When the pair arrived the rest of the family was already waiting at the table. They stood and smiled as the pair approached and extended hands of friendship, but Abarxsis noticed his lover had remained frozen at the doorway.

A myriad of emotions went across their face as their eyes focused on the family. Their hands tightened into fists as they looked slowly from the table to Abarxsis, who was still smiling, and glared at him.

“You did this?” she asked through clenched teeth.

The smile quickly fell away from Abarxsis’s face as he realized something was very much wrong.

“Abarxsis did.” He confirmed. “Abarxsis saw how talking of family upset Kelly, so Abarxsis-“

Kelly turned and left the room without hearing out the rest of his reasoning. He turned back and saw Kelly’s family looking confused and went after his lover. She stood out in front of the restaurant pulling out her communicator to summon a hover cab.

“What is wrong?” Abarxsis asked as he came up behind her. Kelly’s head turned to him to see it now awash with rage and anger….and betrayal, much to Abarxsis’s surprise.

“I told you I didn’t want to talk about my family.” Kelly began, her fists still clenched tight. “I had made it perfectly clear that I had no desire to speak with them, or speak of them, or even be near them from the moment we met.”

“Abarxsis know’s this-“  Abarxsis began but Kelly held up a hand to forestall him.

“You don’t speak,” she remarked harshly, “just stand there and listen because I am about to be as fucking direct as I can possibly be.”

Kelly only swore to Abarxsis when she was truly angry so Abarxsis remained silent as she continued.

“My family……”,she stopped and collected her thoughts for a moment as if a torrent of words wished to flow all at the same time from her mouth, “are nothing but parasites; and I have not wanted them near them since the day I left their hellhole of a home.”

“They have leached off me financially, mentally, and emotionally all my life. I was the only one to hold a stable job and they expected me to pay for them while they sat around and did nothing. I was the one they came to when they were dumped by their lovers after they found out they were cheating on them. And when I told them I wanted no more part in their problems they berated me by telling me without them I would not even be here so “it was the least you can do to be grateful”.”

Abarxsis had seen his lover angry before but this was something else. This was not just simple disdain or annoyance; this was a deep rooted hatred that ran through the core of Kelly’s being.

“I left,” she continued, “because it was the only way I could be free from their toxicity and now, despite me telling you otherwise, you have brought that toxicity back to me.”

“But..” Abarxsis spoke unsurely, “they are still Kelly’s family.”

“You were my new family.” Kelly laughed without joy and fixed him with a cold stare. “They stopped being my family the day I left them.”

A hover car slowly pulled up and the door popped open for Kelly. She started to enter when the rest of the family came out and started calling out to her.  Abarxsis watched Kelly look back at him and see her expression now one of disappointment and sorrow, before she entered the hover car and closed the door behind her.

The hover car pulled away as the family came up and began calling out Kelly’s name while shouting recent needs for money or how disappointed they were that she hadn’t spoken to them in so long. Once the hover car was out of sight the family then turned on Abarxsis making the same demands. Abarxsis looked at them with confusion as this was not what a family should be. The love and support he had felt from his was nowhere within the eyes of Kelly’s former family.

Abarxsis came to understand why Kelly did what she did and realized that despite their constant need to pack bonding and need for family, the human concept of family was something not as simple to define.  

#humans are insane #humans are weird #humans are space oddities #humans are space orcs #story #writing #original writing #niqhtlord01 #family drama

[honeii-puff]

Ive started exploring the "Humans are space orcs" tag and i now would like to add my piece to the wonders of it.

Humans have evolved to eat certain foods and plants that were meant to be poisonous, like cocoa and mint. Imagine the other species of aliens cant eat this stuff either.

Let me paint the picture:

Human: *about to bite into a bar of mint chocolate* Alien: *Smacks chocolate bar out of hand* Human: *Frowns* what was that for?! Alien: I read the organized list of ingredients on the packaging of this human treat you were about to ingest two highly poisonous ingredients! Human: Reall? Alien: Yes! Mint and Cocoa! Human:... Those aren't poisonous. Alien: Yes they are! The death rate that is caused by these ingredients is very high! I've seen it in my reports on Terra! Human: What were these reports on? Alien: The fauna of your home planet! It said that the ingestion of these will kill you, like it kills us! Human:..I've had this before. Alien: *horrified face* So you've been purposefully ingesting poison?! Human: What?! no! It just doesn't affect us. Some other animals on Earth can get hurt by it but- Alien: So does every other species that I have come into contact with! You humans are weird creatures.

#humans are space orcs #sci fi

[injuries-in-dust]

Trall leaned back in their chair as they took a sip of Stimulate liquid.

The place was so nice and quiet, they were finally getting their paperwork done.

Nice and...

They jumped to their tentacles. Stimulate Liquid fell to the floor but went ignored. Trall hurried from the room as fast as they could parambulate.

The place was quiet!

What the heck were those humans up to?

#humans are space orcs #humans are weird #like kids #if it's quiet #thats when you worry #humams shouldnt be unsupervised #drabble #thought up in like two minutes

[east-easy-pick]

#fluid dynamics #dinah jane #thomas shelby #humans are space orcs #actually adhd #sales #twitter #egirl noods #taehyung layouts #lolita fashion #bat family #hilda #female dominance

[establish-suddenly]

https://jamie-321.tengp.icu/s/qiaoQXH

#mist #running man #kustomblr #self care reminder #occultism #roger federer #humans are space orcs #jinx #greenhouse #hugh dancy

[nopennyallthoughts]

One thing that I am 100% convinced would send an alien into cardiac arrest is sweating.

It sounds stupid but think about it: apart from horses, humans are the only species on earth that can sweat so it's not a far stretch to believe it would be incredibly rare in extraterrestrials as well.

Just imagine, one day the AC in the main engine room is broken and everyone starts panting like crazy because of the heat, but the human? Just keeps working like usual? It's not like they aren't affected by the heat at all, but they aren't breathing quite as hard as the rest and everyone thinks ahh yes, humans must have extreme durability to heat coming from that death planet. And then. The human starts melting?!?? And suddenly everyone is panicking because their human is leaking all sorts of important nutrients, metals and water out of every pore - are they dying? Surely this cannot be normal!

And the human has to explain that, no they are perfectly healthy and yes it is actually just the human body's way of cooling itself down and no they don't think it's "the coolest thing ever!!", wait till it starts to smell!

#humans are eldritch horrors #humans are space orcs #humans are space oddities #humans are deathworlders #humans are space australians

[humansarespaceorcsforeal]

Human Observation Log 192

Out of concern for our Human crewmate, I tried to warn them about the Nardian that just joined our crew. As you know, Nardian’s are highly volatile and will not hesitate to challenge even weak species to duel. They bath weekly in the blood of animals and come from a planet that is constantly at war. Their aggression is well known to all but when I informed our Human, Kim, they became agitated. They accused me of being ‘racist’ and expressed their ‘deep disappointment.’ 

I do not understand. I was merely concerned for their physical wellbeing. Kim left, declaring their intention to become friends with the Nardian. Human’s do not understand that it is impossible to befriend a Nardian.

Human Observation Log 192: Follow up

The Human has befriended the Nardian. His name is Greg. I have been invited to join them for red mud baths as a form of ‘self-care.’ I am beginning to believe Human Kim could befriend anyone short of an Android.

Human Observation Log 192: Follow up

Human Kim has befriended the Android and I understand nothing.

#humans are space orcs #humans are weird #human's will pack bond with anything and any one #space #space ship #crew #humanity #aliens

[what-if-i-just-did]

So, something I learnt the other day. So, you know how dinosaurs supposedly can't see you if you stand still? Well that myth is based on real-life lizards/etc and how eyes in general work. So, once my dad starts infodumping, here comes some other cool information. We, humans, can in fact, also not see something unless it's moving. We fixed this by having our eyes constantly shake. And then our brain compensates for us, so we don't have to have shaky vision.

What if aliens don't have this? Like. What if they find out when one of us was looking at something in the distance, and they walk around this thing that's in front of them, and the alien is confused so they bob their head and oh, there's a thing there, but how did the human know that, and then we explain and they're like, horrified.

Humans are apex predators. They can hunt in packs. They can hunt in pairs. They can hunt on their own. They're persistance predators, which is unheard of. They get stronger when they're mad or scared. They have this thing called 'body language' which acts like a type of hivemind, even if they'll claim it isn't. And. They can see you. When you're not moving. They can still see you. If you ever find yourself in a fight against a human, for whatever reason? Run. Run as fast as you can. And hope, pray if you have a religion, that they won't follow.

#humans are space fae #humans are space orcs #humans are the weird ones #humans are space australians #earth is a deathworld #humans are deathworlders

[stubz]

I saw a bunch of humans are space orcs, and humans are feared by aliens, etc. and want to add to it.

Kid centre for all alien children/younglings run by humans.

-"Human Kim! Are you all right? Do you seek medical aid??"

"I'm okay! ...why do you ask?"

"You just got bit by Zyz! I'm so sorry, I've told him to not do that with others but-!"

"Hey, it's okay. Look, these things happen and I know that's just your species' way of showing affection. Just tell him to ask next time and to not bite too hard."

"... 'these things happen' .... 'tell him to ask next- human Kim has this happened to you before?!"

"Oh lots of times! I used to work at a daycare on earth before this. Now, you wanna talk about bites let me tell you about Penny, she was a biter. So was my nephew but that was him stimming. I just asked that he get my attention first so as to not startle me."

"Is this the same Penee who gave you 3 stitches?"

"Yep."

-"Human Kim, thank you for helping Pollix become comrades with the other younglings! May I ask how you did it so I may use it in the future?"

"Of course! It wasn't anything special really, we just wrestled which caught the attention of the other kids and soon enough they were cheering for Pollix to win. Then after that Xw and a few others asked Pollix to teach her how to wrestle as well." they finished with a smile.

"YOU WHAT!"

"I-I thought play wrestling and fighting was encouraged among young tighalax. I am so sorry if I did something wrong-!"

"Human Kim, you could have DIED."

"...huh?"

"Tighalaxes have what you call drugs in the points of our tails and one cut should drive you insane. Not only that but we, as younglings, should be nearly twice your body weight. And at this age have yet to control our strength!"

"Ooh so that's why I felt high! Phew! I thought I accidentally ate my weed muffin instead of the regular one, and we can't have that."

"You felt 'high'?"

"Yeah but only for 10 minutes, luckily I usually just get tired and relaxed when high. And for the weight strength part, I grew up babysitting all of my younger siblings and cousins. My child carrying records are 5 4-6 year olds, 4 7-12 year olds, 3 teenagers, and 2 childish giants who are somehow 21 this year."

"...any chance I can bribe you to quit and come work for me and my pack?"

#aliens #humans are space oddities #humans are space orcs #the adventures of kim and max running a space child care centre

[skritzzy]

I feel like any aliens that were prey at some point in evolution would have an odd fear of humans. Mostly cause they look like predators, act a bit like predators, and ARE predators. One perfect example is when we're focused on something like a mosquito that's been bugging us for a long time and we are just done.

Alien: "What. What..?"

Human: *HUNTING down a mosquito it saw*

Alien: ".... yeah I am really uncomfortable...."

Human: *quiet footsteps, pupils dialated, intense focus,*

Alien: *WAR FLASHBACKS*

Human: "Found you." *absolutely desimates the mosquito, squashing it into a million pieces as it's guts and various body parts liquidize into blood of the bloodthirsty, now stained on the palm of the human. A living being now reduced to a useless corpse as the human wipes the remains on their pants*

Alien: "I feel like I've just gained trauma."

#inspired by the hill of mosquito corpes i've placed on top of the fridge #aliens #humans are space orcs #humans are weird #humans are space oddities #space australia #humans are space fae #humans are space australians #humans and aliens

[silver-tangent]

Sometimes I think about how the entire history of the advancement of human weapons can be boiled down to: “we found more elaborate ways to hit things with rocks…”

Spears? Sharpened rocks.

Slingshot? Ranged rocks.

Arrows? Sharpened rocks with range.

Hammers/Clubs? Refined rocks.

Swords/axes? Sharpened refined rocks.

Guns? Sharpened, refined rocks, propelled by explosives…

We discovered how to make explosives, and we fine tuned that technology to better propel refined and sharpened rocks at insane distances… we are still hitting things with rocks… we just became experts in the science of hitting things with rocks… The human race is basically just a “dump everything into geology” build…

#late night tangent #humans #humans are space orcs #rocks #medieval weapons #modern weapons

[kurara-black-blog]

I just love the "they're more scared of you than you are of them" thing because, yeah, Earth is a Deathworld filled with very dangerous beings, but also everyone in it is scared and would rather not interact with each other unless necessary

Alien: This is a very dangerous animal!

Human: Don't worry, we'll just walk away.

Alien: But it's watching us!

Human: It's hoping we leave already, so we're leaving.

Alien: It... It is?

Human: Yeah, it is more scared of us than we are of it. Let's go before the fight instinct kicks in because then it'll become a dangerous animal

Alien:...

#humans are space fae #humans being humans #humans are deathworlders #humans are space oddities #humans are space orcs #humans are weird #humans are space australians

[injuries-in-dust]

I don't know why, but I like the idea of humans being to aliens, what cats are to humans...

Alien1: hey, when did you hire a human?

Alien 2: we didn't. They just wandered aboard one day, saying they wanted to "hitch a ride." Then they never left. I think they like it here.

Alien 1: the human distribution system has chosen.

***

Alien stares at the human, who has climbed up a very high shelving unit.

Alien: Human, get down before you hurt yourself.

The humans response is to climb higher.

***

Alien is secretly filming their human, who is spaced out and just staring at nothing.

Alien (whispering): I think the human is about to intercept the brain cell. (Laughter) don't worry human, if it tingles that means it's working.

#funny #humans are space orcs #humans are weird #adorable #cute #humans are space australians #humans are space oddities #humans are space cats #feel free to add to this

[chaoticbooklesbian]

Human: *crying, in pain, experiencing minor neurological symptoms* This is delicious, what's in it? Alien: ...our strongest, deadliest poison. Human: How much for a bottle to send home? My mom would absolutely love it. Alien: If you let a team of our finest scientists deliver it and study her reaction, it's free. Human: Sweet, I'm sure she'd be up for that, let me give her a call--

#pedanticblah #humans are weird #humans are space orcs #this post brought to you by my dinner tonight #there were no minor neurological symptoms #unless you count the temperature fuckery spicy food causes #but i had tears streaming down my face #and my only concern was not dripping them into the sauce #(it was garlic sauce for anyone curious)

[jimvasta]

Humans are average at everything

And that makes other species crazy

"You swim well for your limb configuration but you will never be as fast in water as a Majoriranji."

Mo agreed with a nod. "They have fins, it's an unfair contest really."

"Nacbaqurs climb cliffs better than humans."

"Longer limbs, more fingers, that's no surprise. I know some elite climbers who could keep up but mostly ture enough."

"Chexits run much faster."

"Ah," Mo raised a finger. "They run on four legs, different configuration, unfair comparison. "

"My point is still valid. And you don't fly either."

"Mmm, no," Mo stopped to consider that one. "I don't think we have a winged ancestor. I have been sky diving, though, so I'm sure we missed out there."

"Sky diving? No, I have no wish to know. My question is this, why are you so feared? You cannot swim like a Majoriranji, or climb like a Nacbaqur, or run like a Chexit. Can you do anything special? Why should anyone be scared of humans?"

"Is that why you captured us? That's what you want to know?" Mo smiled as he leaned back in his chair. He had been afraid. Now he was amused.

He knew rescue was on the way. Just before the invaders managed to grab him and the other researchers, they were able to send a distress call. The Earth Alliance took attacks on their people seriously, they knew swift responses discouraged casual piracy.

"Okay, you'll probably be dead soon anyway so I'll give you a freebie. We're not the fastest swimmers, but most of us can swim and dive, and we can all hold our breath. We're not the fastest climbers, but our ancestors lived in trees, tall canopy plants, we can all climb. We're not the fastest runners, but we're not bad in a sprint, and we'll still be going hours after your fancy fast runners have collapsed and died of exhaustion. We don't have to be the best at one thing when we can be pretty good at just about everything."

#humans are space orcs #haso #writer #writers on tumblr #humans are space australians #humans are joats #jack of all trades

[mercyraph]

Humans are weird

Have yall noticed how we somehow have strange aversions towards lights?? Like maybe not all of us, but we kind of know that if someone is sitting in the dark, you either leave them or join them. Like last night, I walked into class and there was just one guy there and the lights were off so i just sat down, 30 minutes later everyone else was in and the lights were still off. Only turned it on when the professor came in...

So like imagine aliens finding us huddled in a dark room, with our phones and what-nots, silently laughing at something we read, maybe there are other aliens with us who doesn’t really like light but we don't know that cus it's dark and also we didn't bother to check. Then one crewmate just turns on the lights and we all collectively hiss like a vampire or hide like bugs, so they just turn it back off and stumble blindly into the room until they find—feel through whatever they came for and leaves. No one ever mentions it.

#humans are deathworlders #humans are space oddities #humans are space australians #humans are space orcs #humans are strange #humans are space fae #humans are weird #human #humans