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#humans and aliens
improper-use-of-germx · 5 months
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Not enough alien x human romances with bioluminescence imo. Alien trying SO casually to keep their lights to themselves, but every time you pass by they get so overwhelmed with the need to dazzle you. As enamored as you are with the pretty lightshow they are just as much obsessed with your reaction, trying to gauge your strange human expressions for reciprocation. Not that you don't compliment them outright, but all they can do when you try is glow a different color. PLEASE show them human fireworks, or decorate your room with fairy lights, even if you didn't mean it a declaration of romance they're flashing every color of every rainbow because omg you shared your light with them even though your body isn't capable of doing it in the same way! You have an alien partner now, I don't make the rules.
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skritzzy · 10 months
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I feel like any aliens that were prey at some point in evolution would have an odd fear of humans. Mostly cause they look like predators, act a bit like predators, and ARE predators. One perfect example is when we're focused on something like a mosquito that's been bugging us for a long time and we are just done.
Alien: "What. What..?"
Human: *HUNTING down a mosquito it saw*
Alien: ".... yeah I am really uncomfortable...."
Human: *quiet footsteps, pupils dialated, intense focus,*
Alien: *WAR FLASHBACKS*
Human: "Found you." *absolutely desimates the mosquito, squashing it into a million pieces as it's guts and various body parts liquidize into blood of the bloodthirsty, now stained on the palm of the human. A living being now reduced to a useless corpse as the human wipes the remains on their pants*
Alien: "I feel like I've just gained trauma."
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jpitha · 5 months
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Vocal Mimicry and Ear Worms
Every time the drink machine finished, it played a little song.
It was pretty simple, less than 10 notes, but it was the same song, every time.
It wasn't even that it played the same song every time. It wasn't even that everyone on the ship - except the humans - got a drink from the machine.
The song was catchy.
Peg started it. She just found her self whistling the "drink finished" song one day. "beep beepita beep beep beep beepita beeeeeeep." She couldn't help it.
Then, Kelly picked it up. The song worked its way into her head too. She'd be working at her station and suddenly she'd be struck by an intense need to sing the song.
After about three cycles, every single human on the ship was singing it. Normally, this would be chalked up by the rest of the crew as "just another strange Human thing" but the problem was that it was the 'drink finished' song. Everyone onboard was conditioned to want to go get their drink when the song was done.
The humans could mimic is perfectly.
"beep beepita beep beep beep beepita beeeeeeep."
Captain Flowing River Rapid's feathers fluffed in irritation. Two people on the Command Deck got three quarters of the way out of their seats before they realized what they were doing and sat back down, sheepish. "Desmond! What have I said about mimicing the drink finished melody?"
Desmond ducked his head at the reproach. "Sorry Captain River, I couldn't help it. It's just so catchy."
Captain River clacked his beak. "It wouldn't be so bad if not for the fact that you can all mimic the sound so well."
Desmond turned and looked at the Captain. "What? We are? We're singing it, but it doesn't sound exactly like the drink machine."
The Captain pointed at Desmond accusingly. "Don't deny it! You're all singing the song at all times of the cycle! You know that everyone thinks a drink is ready when you do it. You sound exactly like the machine!"
One of the Sefigans who got partially up from their station nods quickly, their antenna bobbing. "Captain River is correct, Des. You all really sound a lot like the drink machine. How are you doing it?"
Desmond shrugged. "I mean, we heard the song, and it gets like, stuck in our heads. Singing it feels like one way to get it out. Plus, it's fun to sing Kel. Fun to make sounds."
Kel's wing covers clack. "Can you mimic other things?"
"I don't know Kel, I don't really think of myself as a mimic. There are others who can do it much better than me. Some humans made a whole career out of it."
"That sounds like a thing I human would do, yes. But what about your Des? Let's see...." Kel looks down at their station. "What about this?"
Kes runs a test for the collision alarm. It's a warbling rising and falling tone."
Des thinks for a second and sings - for him - a pretty close approximation.
Captain River gasps and leans back in his chair. "How do you do that?"
Desmond wails. "It wasn't even that good! I just heard the tones and repeated them."
Kelly entered the Command Deck just then. She was carrying a pad and her overalls looked stained. "Captain River, I've just come to report tha-"
"Kelly! Mimic the collision alarm"
"What? Um.." Kelly makes the same noise."
Now, everyone on the Command Desk gasps. Kelly is taken aback and looks at Desmond. "What's going on Des?"
Desmond sighs. "They say we're all mimics. It started with the drink machine."
"Oh that. I still can't get it out of my head! 'beep beepita beep beep beep beepita beeeeeeep.'"
Kes starts to rise from his seat again and catches himself, and sits back down swearing.
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cookthepenguin · 9 months
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Humans have three modes: fuck, pet and eat. Whatever you are, wherever you are, know; if a human looks at you, one of these will activate and you can’t escape.
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0-yeni-0 · 1 month
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You know how some animals asume humans are they’re same species, like penguins that kinda just asume we are bigger oddly colored penguins, what if it was the same with aliens what if some species se enough similarities to themselves.
It would be even funnier if the aliens looked almost nothing like humans
ho yea this is my friend called Stanley he is the same species as me , ho why is he 10 times taller than? me ho well I don’t know, his tone of color? It’s nothing, probably a weird DNA mutation
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ladyironsky · 1 year
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When the aliens realize the human urge to pack-bond is stronger than the predator instinct they are extremely relieved.  They also start stocking their ships with anything remotely pack-bondable to entice humans to protect said ship.  This includes anything from actual pets, like cats, to inanimate objects like one ship that has a whole army of roombas following the human around.
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spacexchaos · 9 months
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pov: aliens speak in a way that is impossible for humans to mimic with our own voices and mouth shapes so we’re just improvising
human 1: this is my alien friend, Steve
human 2: Steve..? sorry it’s just i didn’t think extraterrestrials would have such.. human names
steve: oh, steve is simply what my human companion here calls me
human 2: oh? what’s your actual name?
steve: *alien noises that are incomprehensible to human beings*
human 2: …yeah alright, we’ll go with steve
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writing-to-survive · 6 months
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#119
"You're nothing at all of what I thought an alien would look like," Human says.
"What did you think I was going to look like?" Alien asks.
"I don't know. Multiple arms or heads. Maybe three eyes. Huge heads. Green skin," Human mumbles. "But you look like a human. Like me."
"You are very stereotypical. And—" Alien states.
"Sorry," Human winches.
"—saying we look like your species is an insult. The major difference between our two species is that mine is much more advanced than yours. I mean, you guys are still traveling to space in tin cans."
"I was wrong about what I thought you looked like, but I'm spot on about your personality," Human says.
"Intelligent and honest?" Alien assumes, grinning.
"A stuck-up, know it all who thinks their better than everyone else," Human corrects, wiping the smrik right off Alien's face.
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A human explaining the joke of “space Australia” and how everything in Australia wants to kill you.
The ship had just finished a routine resupply, and with it, came the shuffling of many crew members. Some were taking leave, some were being reassigned, some were coming, some were going.
Qithar was not up for reassignment, and so went on with his normal duties, as old crewmembers left new faces took their places. This particular ship was relatively diverse - hosting crew from many different species, including humans, who had only recently joined the Federation.
Qithar was only just starting to understand their strange behavior. They were far-and-above the most outgoing species he’d ever encountered, and they integrated into most crews with little to no hassle. But once you started learning of their home planet, called “Earth” and how the humans lived, they suddenly didn’t seem so friendly.
It was common for humans to live in places with climates or regularly occurring natural phenomena that would render them inhabitable to Qithar’s own species, not to mention the other lifeforms that inhabited their planet.
As he was completing an inspection in the cargo bay, Qithar overheard several of his human crewmates conversing and laughing. From the conversation, one of them appeared to be telling some newcomers about life on the ship and other species they may see aboard.
“I think it’s sort of easy to forget that humans and our way of life aren’t the norm out here,” the seasoned crewmember was saying. “I think a lot of non-humans think we’re crazy, or insanely resilient.”
The others laughed. “How so?” one of them asked.
The first crewmate hummed. “Well, there was that one time we had a spider infestation in the kitchen. Weird space spiders with like, twenty legs and one really long, goofy-looking antenna. They were like, maybe the size of a housefly, and pretty harmless, all things considered, but all the non-humans were deathly afraid of them for some reason.”
Qithar remembered the infestation. He had been nearly brought to hysterics when he found one crawling on his morning rations. The ship had never had a pest infestation before. What if they carried some unknown disease? Just one bite, and the ship could say goodbye to all of it’s living crew. He remembered being horrified at the human’s reactions.
The human crewmembers had offered to study the spiders (for science) and then dispose of them, since everyone else seemed so reluctant. At the end of the study, they explained their conclusions so nonchalantly, to the horrified reactions of everyone else. Apparently, the spiders were relatively harmless, though they did bite (using their strange antenna), and could feed off blood or other bodily fluids from many different species. The humans explained that the only side effects were small itchy bumps, causing temporary discomfort.
It didn’t stop the rest of the crewmembers from being cautious. Really, it made them question the sanity of the humans on board. Why would they deliberately get close to something that feeds on your blood, and wounds you in the process?
Qithar remembers the humans laughing, and one of them saying that there were bigger and meaner ones in “Australia” (where ever that is). He figured it was another human-occupied planet, and vowed never to go there.
Pulled out of his thoughts, Qithar noticed the human crewmember was finishing his story. “If you think about it, to everyone else, Earth is to the rest of the Federation what Australia is to us.”
“Space Australia,” laughed another crewmember.
“Exactly!”
This marks the second time Qithar had heard of this planet. In morbid fascination, he wondered what horrors might exist on this “Australia” that would make humans consider it dangerous. Seeing as there were several humans right there, he felt inclined to ask, if only so his nightmares didn’t come up with something worse.
“Excuse me,” he called to them, catching their attention. “I’ve heard it mentioned before, but what is this ‘Australia’ that you’re talking about?”
The first crew member smiled at him, in that uniquely human way. “Oh, it’s just a little joke we like to share,” he explained. “Australia is a continent on Earth with the stereotype of having lots of really deadly creatures that always seem like their out to get you. From experience, most non-humans view Earth that same way.” He shrugged. “Hence the joke that Earth is Space Australia.”
“There are things on Australia that try to kill you?” Qithar asked, latching onto those words.
“Eh, not directly. They’re just animals defending themselves, and humans are the ones getting all up in their business anyways.”
“You mean humans actually go to Australia? Knowing the dangers?”
The human crewmates all shared an amused look, the first one with a look on his face that said ‘See?’
“Yeah,” he replied. “People live there permanently. It’s actually pretty populated.”
Qithar could feel himself getting lightheaded at just the thought. Actual people living in a place that so frequently tried to harm its inhabitants that they’ve made a joke about it. He thought the rest of Earth was terrifying.
“Thank you,” he managed to croak weakly. He turned away from the humans and went back to his work, but he couldn’t get the conversation out of his head.
That night, he dreamt he was chased by a massive space spider, with twenty legs and a long antenna, and prayed he would never be reassigned to Earth.
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emborgor · 6 months
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Going off from this idea and some amazing reblogs and replies. Then it turned into another thing
Alien Capitan: How can we keep you from burning out and help you achieve the required amount of interaction?
Human: So- you know the lights? They buzz. Everything buzzes. i can hear all the electricity, but the lights are the worst. They all buzz differently.
A: what buzzing?
H: Can you not hear it?
H: anyways, it overstimulates me, i get overwhelmed, and it does not help anything.
A: okay, would removing all sources of unneccisary stimulation help? Might we turn off the lights and ensure voices are kept low with the bare minimum you need in order for you to complete your task around?
H: Unfortunately no. I get understimulated which is just as bad
A: so what am i supposed to do?? How do you live with this anyways???
H: Honestly man, I don't really know. Changing out the lights would be an awesome start. As well as if I were allowed to listen to music- not on speaker or anything, but also have sound proofing for when I need it. Oh and while we're at it, can I request that once I begin a task nobody interrupts it? It is very hard to get back to a task and I get infinitely frustrated.
A: I suppose we can! Just as your kind has learned to cover your teeth as you smile, we can learn to accommodate you!
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stormy-river · 1 month
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Transcripts from the Humanity Hotline 7
As I finished this, I discovered it's been exactly one year since I posted the last Transcript. A lot has happened in that year; I've graduated college :) . I want to thank everyone for the support I've received, and I hope to get back into some of my creative projects and give you guys an opportunity to laugh, and maybe learn something. This one is inspired by a request from @a-romantic-twst from forever ago; I hope it was worth the wait (sorry about that). (It's about periods if anyone's uncomfortable with that and wants to skip this one.)
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Operator: "Hi, my name is Mindy. How may I help you today?"
Caller: "Hello, Mindy, I am very concerned about one of the humans on my ship."
O: "What seems to be the problem?"
C: "Well, I'm the chief medical officer and this particular human has been on the ship for just over two Earth months now. On two separate occasions during that time, she has requested strong painkillers citing 'Shark Week' as the reason. I looked into what 'Shark Week' is, and found an Earth television special about certain aquatic predators, and I'm unsure how that could cause a human physical pain lightyears from Earth?"
O: "Interesting, is there anything else you can tell me about this human during these events?"
C: "Yes, I've also received reports from other crewmembers around these events that this human is not as outgoing as usual, and shows signs of discomfort with facial expressions and changes in appetite, but does not respond well to the standard psychological protocols for team building and social connection."
O: "What about the timing? You said this has happened twice, correct? How much time was between them?"
C: "Yes, I've documented both with dates. The human requested the painkillers twice, 28 days apart. The crew reported signs of distress for a few days following each request, and two times in the day before the first request."
O: "Alright, I believe your human is using the phrase, "Shark Week" as a euphemism for the start of the menstrual cycle, which is often referred to as a 'period'. To put it simply, one of the female reproductive organs sheds its inner lining roughly once an Earth month, lasting anywhere from a few days to a full week."
C: "Similar to how the Rythyani shed and replace their stomach linings?"
O: "Yes, though the uterus has blood vessels that extend into that lining, so shedding also causes bleeding."
C: "Bleeding? How much blood is lost? Why has she not requested bandages or a transfusion?"
O: "For most, a period is not life-threatening. The amount of blood loss does not require a transfusion to replace, or bandages to stop, though iron deficiency may be a concern for some that can be easily remedied through their diet. Ultimately, your human will know her body and how to handle her cycle best. We learn to deal with periods from a relatively young age. You should have received a human anatomy and physiology textbook when the first human joined your crew. Do you have it?"
C: "Yes, though I do admit I have not yet had the time to read it."
O: "That's alright. The chapter on human reproductive systems goes into more detail about the biology of the menstrual cycle than I can tell you. For the time being, make sure your human knows that she can ask for support if needed, and inform your crew that not all humans will be happy all the time, and they don't need to be. Over time, you will gain a better understanding your humans' patterns. Until then, trust them to express their needs, and talk to them if you have specific concerns. I can give general advice, but they will know themselves best."
C: "Thank you for clearing up the confusion, Mindy, I will look into this and update the protocols as necessary. I have no more questions for you at this time."
O: "You are very welcome, please don't hesitate to call again if something else comes up."
End Transmission
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improper-use-of-germx · 5 months
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Alien who gets badly wounded when a mission goes south, you have to sling one arm over your shoulder and drag them to a doctor. While they're fading in and out of consciousness they begin purring, limp head pressed into the side of your neck so you can feel the rumbles travel through your entire body. Just this massive, blissed-out alien who isn't even comprehending that they're hurt because you're here, and they've wanted to express their feelings for you for so long but didn't want to scare you away. Good luck escaping their iron grip before the meds wear off, and if you somehow do, watch out! All their fuzzy mind can remember is that they had finally had you, and even the worst injuries won't be able to stop them from trying to have you again.
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mozarella-chesse · 4 months
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Humans are weird: a smile on the battlefield
Aliens know why people smile and what a smile means - something bright and good, but they are afraid that on the battlefield soldiers smile in the face of the enemy.
This makes them think that we are more predators than we seem: species usually show their teeth to intimidate the enemy. At least under a human smile on the battlefield, various forms can be hidden: concussion, defensive reaction, deliberate disorientation of the enemy or absolute confidence in victory - battle or war.
Another confirmation that humans are space orcs.
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jpitha · 1 year
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Hunting
It is unlikely that humans are the only predator species to achieve sapience in the galaxy.
In order to be a successful predator one has to be intelligent enough to learn your prey's movements and be able to think ahead to what they're going to do next but also be flexible enough in your thinking that you can improvise if the situation chances. If you don't have this elasticity, you won't be a very successful predator.
Humans are very successful predators.
****
Greg bent down low and spoke as quietly as he could to the worried Sefigan next to him. "I need you to stay as still as you can. I'm going to go around, and try and surprise the Gren guarding the exit."
The three Sefigans, caught between wanting to obey Greg and staying silent but also trying to communicate that they thought it was suicide to do so started shaking.
"No, no, it'll be fine. I've been watching him. He's not really paying attention." Greg stood silently and put one finger to his lips, then smiled.
Moving much quieter than one would think given his mass, Greg crept away, hunched down just a little to keep motion out of the tops of the bushes they used to hide. The Sefigans watched in horrified fascination as Greg would take a few steps and then freeze, not even breathing while he watched the Gren.
As he walked, he made no noise at all over the soft sand, his feet finding purchase slowly. The Sefigans, a small furry prey species from a rocky mountainous world felt very old fears from the most early parts of their brains while watching him hunt the Gren.
The Gren guard was panning slowly as he guarded the exit, his fur flat, his eyes dull and his mouthparts drooping. If one knew a bit about Gren physiology one could easily see that he was bored and tired. His shift wasn't due to end for another 3 demi-cycles and nothing usually ever happened on this exit.
When Greg was no more than 2 meters away, he reached down and picked up a stone, no larger than a comm badge. He raised his arm and in one silent fluid motion, tossed the stone high and far over his head, to hide its origin. It clattered against the wall on the far side of the pen, opposite to where Greg was standing. The noise and motion caught the Gren's eye and his whole body swung over to where the stone landed.
His back was turned to Greg.
Greg bent his legs low building energy and took two steps and lept onto the Gren's back. His higher mass bowled the taller but much lighter Gren over and the Gren's head hit the stone with a hollow thwack.
Greg jumped up off the Gren and checked him quickly. He was dead. Trotting quickly over to where the Sefigans were still hiding he motioned for them to follow.
Still terrified, they followed this... ambush predator they were scared of and by the time they reached him, he had gotten the comm out of the Gren's pack and was fiddling with a ring that had complicated studs all around it, fitting them against the door until one clicked and the door hissed open.
Minutes later they were all running across the desert to the canal below where they had hoped to cling to the side of a barge and float to the spaceport.
"Human Greg! Human Greg!" The smallest Sefigan called as they jogged down the sandy hill towards the canal.
"What is it Li? Can it wait?"
"That was amazing! I've never seen a human hunt before! Is that how they all do it?"
"Not really? Humans developed as persistence hunters, not ambush hunters, but as you well know, skills can be taught."
"Persistence hunter?"
"Yeah, my ancestors would pick an animal out of a herd and run after it. As long as we didn't overexert ourselves we could just... run until it died."
The three Sefigans looked at each other as they jogged. Greg wasn't breathing heavily as they went towards the canal, but all three of them were nearly at their limit and would need a long time to rest when they were safe.
"Human Greg, you scare us." The tallest Sefigan looked back at the holding compound and then back at Greg. "But, not as much as we were scared of what the Gren would have done to us."
Greg smiled showing his wide, large, white teeth. "In this world, sometimes you need to be scary." He looked at the canal. "Come on, the water isn't too cold, let's get in and swim towards that barge. It's not too far."
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cats-and-anime-789 · 2 years
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Humans are space orcs:
Running from the monsters in the dark:
The crew had settled down in the crew quarters and human-Mary was standing by the lights. After she turned them off, Mary quickly dashed towards her bunk and dove under the covers.
“Go Mary go! It’s gonna get ya!” Human-Jack jeered.
Mary smacked him with a pillow in retaliation. “Shut up, everyone runs from the monster.”
“Monsters? Is there an intruder on the ship?” Cariph (a Small Furred species from the planet Orion) was getting ready to hit the emergency alarm.
“What? Oh no, no. Cariph there are no intruders. It’s just a…a myth or superstition.” Mary looked to the other humans for help, and Jack took over the explanation.
“Basically when humans are little, we all believed that there are monsters that can only get you in the dark. When you turn off the light, you have to run as fast as you can to get to your bed because it can protect you.”
“How can a bed protect you from a living being?” Cariph wondered.
“Well I mean those are the rules, the monsters can’t touch you once you are under the covers. And besides the monsters aren’t real, we just get a feeling that something is there, waiting in the dark to get us.”
“But wait… you said only small humans experience this, so why did Mary run?”
“Well… uh adult humans can get the feeling too. That something is there watching and waiting for you to let your guard down. You can tell yourself that it isn’t real, that it isn’t there, but your hair will still stand up, and your deeper consciousness is saying ‘something is there, something is there. Run.’”. The room descended into an eerie quiet as the rest of the crew digested this terrifying belief of humans.
“Well thanks man, I totally didn’t need to sleep tonight.” Human-Casey grumbled at Jack, causing the rest of the humans to laugh.
“Do you need a nightlight, Casey?”
“You know what, sure.”
“Oh I got some fairy lights” Mary offered. Her and Casey proceed to put these “fairy lights” up around the crew beds. After the room was alight with the small twinkling lights that according to Casey “protect us because the monsters cannot be touched by light, less they disappear.” The humans all went to sleep. The rest of the crew was left wondering why all the humans had the same experience. They wondered if something really was waiting in the dark, and the humans merely convinced themselves that it was fake. After all what would willingly hunt humans?
(Author’s note: Hope anyone who sees this enjoys!)
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carionto · 6 months
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I'm gonna go for a quick run
Being on space stations is all well and good fun. And work. And people. Most of whom you like. And snacks. God, space snacks are the best, half the time the Aliens who bring them are like:
"We read this may be poisonous to Huma
They never get a chance to finish that sentence before I grab whatever it is and munch it down. Pretty much every time it's real spicy or oddly invigorating, it's a nice pastime learning what everyone's shocked expressions look like. Okay, I've had to go to the clinic a few times, and one time I was in a coma for two weeks, but I'm still alive and kicking!
There is the downside of all the noise when everyone talks. The translator unit does dampen to almost nothing everything it translates, but my left ear is sensitive so I tend to take that unit off whenever I'm off the clock. Let me tell you, when everyone is used to hearing everything in their tongue at normal volumes, many end up developing a much louder natural voice.
It gets real confusing sometimes. One thing I have begun to notice is the accents - everyone has very distinct ones. The translator normally renders in a neutral tone, and only adds a slight tinge for the more culturally prominent accents so people understand they are from a different major section of their respective race. But without it, there's so much to each language. At this point I can recognize twenty different clicking sounds that are the same word for this one species.
However, the cafeteria is a hellhole. A radio emitting white noise in a blender that's being microwaved is a peaceful and melodic tune compared to the mixture of thousands of every conceivable noise an organic creature could make. And many more I thought they couldn't - what kind of nightmare anatomy makes a sound that I can only describe as a sickly polystyrene foam mule getting squeezed in a rusty vice.
What kind of ears think that sounds okay?
What kind of noise do they make when making l
actually I don't wanna think about that
I'm just...
gonna go for a run now.
_____________________
Several minutes later.
Among the friendly chatter and typical gossip you find at lunch hour, people started hearing a rhythmic thumping sound regularly coming and going. After the third round, someone decided to investigate and opened their pad to tap into the public camera system. Switching from one to another, they suddenly screamed and dropped their device in shock.
It was Human Hanson. He was in his protective suit. Running in laps.
Around the OUTSIDE of the station!
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