#I’ve done everything I can so far and I’m on track to make my plans happen but like

[adoreeenina]

I wanna be yours - Ch. 1

Relationships: Recom! Miles Quaritch x Sully! Reader x Recom! Lyle Wainfleet

WC: 2.9k

Series Summary: ~~~ 𝗜𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗰𝗵 𝕋𝕨𝕠 𝕣𝕖𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕓𝕚𝕟𝕒𝕟𝕥𝕤 𝕗𝕒𝕝𝕝𝕤 𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖 𝕖𝕝𝕕𝕖𝕤𝕥 𝕕𝕒𝕦𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕖𝕣 𝕠𝕗 𝕁𝕒𝕜𝕖 𝕊𝕦𝕝𝕝𝕪.

It’s been a year since the destruction of our home. The ongoing war has been hard on my family, especially on my father. My father gotten worse… cold, stricter, becoming less kind, especially to Neteyam, Lo’ak, and me. He became more like a Drill Sargent than a father. My father made us move to the hidden caves in the Hallelujah Mountains.

Within a year, the sky people expanded, their sizes tripled. My father had orchestrated many raids to destroy their machinery’s to keep them at bay from exploiting our home anymore than they already done. But no matter what my father has done to keep them away, they always bounce back. I’ve seen many ships constantly landing, bringing more people onto our home and more supplies to rebuild on what we broke.

Today my father prepares us for another attack. The supplies train was coming through the train rails not far. My father’s plan was to damage their railway system and take their supplies as our own.

“Do you have to go” Spider walks behind you as you readied your bow and arrow onto Rawm’s saddle.

“Don’t you worry about me. No matter what they throw at me, I always come back, you know that” Spider walks closer to you as he eyes the scars on your body, it went through so much from protecting Spider and your siblings.

Despite what you tell him, he still feels guilty, and it didn’t help that Neytiri blames him.

“That’s what I’m worried about” Spider softly says as he pats Rawm’s neck. Rawm chirps loving the attention.

You finally turn to look down at Spider. You knew Spider is worried about you. How could he not? You were always getting yourself into trouble and coming back with blood on you. You’re worse than Lo’ak, at least that’s what Jake says.

“Spider” you gently place your hand on his shoulder, making him look up at you.

“I promise you. I’ll come back in one piece” you promise with an encouraging smile. Spider couldn’t help but smile back with a nod.

“Y/n, let’s go” Jake calls for you. You sigh as you turn to check you have everything. You do.

“Don’t do anything stupid until I get back” with that, you bend a knee, placing your foot on Rawm’s harness, pulling yourself up onto his saddle, making Tsaheylu. The bond.

“How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you” you smirk down at Spider as you lower your Rider’s Mask. With a loud yip, Rawm allows himself fall off the ledge.

Ikran’s screech and roars all around you as Rawm fly’s behind Jake and Neytiri. Many of the warriors hooting and ululating, including your mother.

Following close behind, squinting your eyes through the Rider’s mask, you could mask out the fast moving train.

“Ground team, go” you hear Jake speak through the comm.

Hundreds of warriors on direhorses come flooding through the forest, letting out loud war cries. Some carrying bow and arrows while others are armed with heavy artillery.

An explosion went off on the railway, perfectly timed. Part of the track has blown up, the train screeches as it nails its breaks, an attempt to stop, but the destruction was far to close.

The train couldn’t stop in time, colliding to the broken rail railroad, breaking it into pieces and parts of it falling on its side. The two gunships halted a turn. You knew you had to work fast, before they would call for backup to arrive.

Guiding Rawm to one of the gunships with a loud cry. You dove underneath the ship to its left side, readying your bow, you aim to the soldiers chest, killing him. Rawm flys above ship, quickly aiming your bow and arrow, you shoot an arrow, letting it break through the glass and to the pilot, killing him instantly. You let out a holler as you watch the gunship crash down with an explosion.

With that, many the Na’vi below got to work exploiting the scattered RDA cargo. You watched from above for any more incoming airships.

“Let’s go. Two minutes, people. Let’s go.” You hear Jake.

“Bro, we have got to get down there” you hear Lo’ak. You turn to see your two idiot younger brothers, riding close behind you. A mischievous glint in eye, a look that you knew well.

“No way!” Neteyam calls back.

“Dad will skin you alive” you warn.

“Come on. Don’t be wusses” Lo’ak challenges. with that, Lo’ak guides his Ikran to the ground.

“Lo’ak! Get back here, you… Argh!” Neteyam grunts, watching our younger brother

“Damn it, Lo’ak” you yell after your brother. You turn to Neteyam before he could follow your idiot brother.

“Neteyam, go with mom. I’ll get Lo’ak” you tell him. Neteyam hesitates before glancing down at Lo’ak.

“But-“

“Go!” Neteyam hisses under his breath before listening to you and leaves to the other way. You rather take the blame than let Neteyam take the fall for it.

“Taking the whole case! We’re taking mags, the RPGs, the stingers”

You follow close behind Lo’ak as you both land. You hop off of Rawm as you disconnect the bond.

“Y/n, let’s go. Come on!” Lo’ak calls for you before running towards the the rest of the people.

“Lo’ak!” you hiss as you quickly run close behind him.

“Move! Take that!” You hear Tarsem as he hands out RPGs. Lo’ak runs in line, waiting his turn to grab a gun.

“Tarsem don’t-“ before you could stop him, he already handed Lo’ak a gun. Damn it.

“Take these weapons. Here, boy. Go!” Lo’ak excitedly let out a war cry as he walks away with a gun in his hands.

“Lo’ak!” You were getting tired of calling for him. You started sounding like a fucking parrot, the animal you’ve seen on one of the movies Spider has shown you.

You cut off Lo’ak’s ululating as you grab him by his arm, pulling him towards you.

“You don’t even know how to use it” you nod your head towards the gun, visibly irritated.

Lo’ak looks at you with a smirk as he held up the gun, loading the chamber.

“Dad taught me”

You sigh feeling irritated as you watch Lo’ak pick the gun up to look through the scope.

“Stop that! That is not a toy” you hiss. Lo’ak is really testing your patience, you really want to smack him upside the head.

Not far from where you’re at, you hear a spotter hollers out, a signal.

“Gunships inbound! Fall back!” You hear Jake yell.

You look up seeing two more gunships aiming. Shooting.

“Lo’ak, Go!” You push him in front you, running towards your Ikran’s.

“Y/n, come on!” Lo’ak calls for you.

“I’m right behind you! Go! Hurry!”

You look behind and see one of the gunships aiming at you.

“Lo’ak!” You push Lo’ak, just when they shot at you, setting an explosion off. The impact threw you off. You fall with a grunt. Feeling lightheaded from the impact, you reach to touch your head, feeling blood. Shit.

Jake runs through the debris and broken parts of the train, looking for you and Lo’ak. No matter how bad the relationship between you and him. You’re still his daughter.

“Lo’ak, where are you?” Jake calls out, his eyes squints as he tries to see through the smoke.

“Y/n!” He calls out for you. Jake hears coughing and a dark figure and quickly runs towards it. Seeing it’s Lo’ak, he reaches for him.

“Easy, easy, you okay?” Jake softly tries to comfort him. Lo’ak is still in shock but none the less nods

“Yeah”

“Where’s your sister?” Jake hurriedly ask.

“That way” Lo’ak points at a direction.

“Where is she? Where?” Jake follows the direction on where he pointed.

“Get outta here! Go on!” Jake demands, climbs on top of the destroyed gunship seeing a trail of blood.

“Y/n!” Jake calls. He looks . His heart beating rapidly.

“Shit” you cough out.

“Oh no” Jake whispers, he follows the trail and jumps down from the ship. He sees a dead Na’vi on the laying face down. “Oh, no, no, no” he leans down to check the body, seeing it’s not you.

“Oh god” Jake breathes. He hears your coughing. He notices your body not far. He runs and jumps over a rock, kneeling down over you.

You’re laying on your stomach, Jake gently moves you on your back. You groan, the pain going from 0 to 100. You hiss feeling a burning sensation on your back.

“Y/n” Jake says softly.

“Dad?” You cough out, seeing Jake holding you.

Jake grabs you by your shoulder to sit you up and looks over your shoulder, seeing multiple burns and cuts on your back. You hiss from the movement as Jake lays you back down.

“What are you doing here, Y/n?” Jake growls as you cough. “What the hell were you thinking?”

“Dad, can we not-“ you reply weakly.

Jake stands up as he pulls you by your arm and puts your body over his shoulder.

“You’re supposed to be spotters. You spot bogeys, and you call ‘em in. From a distance” Jake growled angrily at you. “Does any of this sound familiar? Get in here!” Jake tells Lo’ak, who was standing by his Ikran, away from our father wrath. Jake is once again acting like a Drill Sargent rather than a father.

You glare at the ground as Jake berates you. He’s pissed. You never cared of his constant piss show. You did what you had to do, and that’s to protect your brother, and you did. You’ll take pride to it, despite what they’ll tell you. You won’t feel guilty or small by your fathers anger.

You turn to your left feeling someone’s hands on you, seeing Kiri. She looks at your back with a grim look. She gently reaches to touch your back, you grab her hand to pull her away.

“Jesus. I let you three geniuses fly a mission and you disobey a direct orders” Jake scolds you. You once again push Kiri’s hands away when you felt her touch a tender wound.

“Kiri, can you go help your grandmother with the wounded? Please?” Jake says with a softer tone.

“My sister is wounded” Kiri points out, unamused by Jake’s behavior towards you. This isn’t new, Kiri is familiar with how Jake treats you, and she hates it.

“It’s fine, Kiri” you reassure her.

“Baby girl, please. Tuk, go with her. Go.” Jake demands softly. Tuk and Kiri leaves with huff sigh.

“Dad” you call. Jake turns and gives you a hard look. You look back with a glare. Out of all your siblings, you’re the only one who’s not afraid to fight back.

“I’m not going to apologize for this. I’ll admit I went against orders and I’ll take full responsibility for that but-“ Jake cuts you off before you can’t continue, making you clench your jaw.

“Yeah, you do. That’s right. ‘Cause you’re the oldest. You gotta act like it” Jake scolds. Your upper lips twitch with a small snarl you let out towards Jake. Jake glares, challenging you.

“Ma’Jake” Neytiri softly calls. Jake reluctantly turns away from you to look at Neytiri. “Your daughter is actually bleeding”

“I am fine, mother” you turn to glare at Jake. “Not like you care” with out being dismissed by him, you roughly bump your shoulder against his.

“Hey! We’re not done talking!” Jake yells after you, but you ignore him as you went to see Mo’at, your grandmother. Neytiri gives Jake a look as she follows close behind you, not before looking at Lo’ak with a knowing look.

“Neteyam, go with them” Jake dismisses his oldest son. Neteyam gives Lo’ak a look before following you.

Jake sighs before looking at Lo’ak, placing his hands on his military vest.

“You do understand that you almost got your sister killed” Jake lowly says.

“Yes sir” Lo’ak nods.

“You’re grounded. No flying for a month” Jake says. Lo’ak looks down, feeling disappointed. He sometimes wish he had the courage to fight back like you did. Lo’ak Unwilling accepts the punishment, not wanting to anger him.

“Now, see to the Ikran. All of em” Jake demands.

“Yes sir” Lo’ak nods.

“And get that crap off your face” Jake demands before leaving.

“Ow. Ow!” You wince as Mo’at works on your back. Spreading the mixed herbs over your wounds.

“Aww, want a kiss on the boo-boo?” Spider teases.

“Shut up” you playfully place your fingers into a bowl with mixed herbs and flick your fingers at him.

“Hey!” Spider laughs.

“Enough!” Mo’at scolds you. A few feet away from you, Kiri is doing another batch of mixed herbs, tasting it with a hum of approval.

Since the arrival of the sky people, your grandmother been teaching Kiri as well but you’re still to be the next Tsáhik and wed to Tarsem. Your grandmother says it’s for the best, but you think bullshit. You know your grandmother is against your father’s mistreatment of you, she assumed if she lays off responsibilities, it’ll give you a break. It somewhat did.

“Give her this” Kiri instructed as she hands the cup to Tuk.

“Okay”

“I would use yalna bark” Kiri mentions to you and your grandmother.

“Here drink” Tuk instructs you. You nodded softly, gratefully smiling at her before taking a sip.

“Ugh” you stick your tongue out, gelling revolted by the taste. Spider laughs at your reaction.

“Oh, you would? And who is Tsahik?” Mo’at says.

“You are, grand… move!” Kiri begins to speak before pushing Lo’ak and Neteyam out of her way. “You are, grandmother. But yalna bark is better.” Kiri argues softly.

“Ow, ow! Ow.” You wince, feeling your grandmother spread more on your back.

“She’s right, grandmother. It stings less” you mention with a wince. Kiri sighs, she hates seeing you in pain, hates seeing you always coming home with a new wound.

“My sister is a mighty warrior!” Neteyam snickers, making fun of your pain.

“Screw you” you curse at Neteyam.

“No cursing” your grandmother chastises before lightly hits your head.

“Ow”

Neytiri looks into the tent, with a disdain look on her face. This is one of many times you’ve been in the healing tent, and she hated every single one. She felt lost, she hated seeing you in so much pain, and the worst part is… you won’t even come to her for comfort like you used to. Since that argument about Spider, she had lost you. And she no one else to blame but herself, for letting her distaste of Spider her the best of her.

Neytiri glance over her shoulder, seeing Jake solely focusing on his guns, it angers Neytiri. You got hurt. Yes, you were okay, but you and your siblings are in the tent. He hardly gave glances at the tent from where he’s sitting.

“What?” Jake sighs, feeling Neytiri’s glare.

“Neteyam and Lo’ak try to live up to you. Y/n despises you” Neytiri starts. She finally turns to look at Jake. “It is very hard on them”

“I know” Jake doesn’t bother making eye contact with Neytiri.

“No. I don’t think you do…” Neytiri moves closer and knelt down close to him. “You are very hard on them. On Y/n”

“I’m their father. It’s my job.” Jake says, finally turning to look at Neytiri with a hard stare.

“This is not a squad. It is a family” Neytiri says softly/sternly. “We almost lost our daughter today”

Jake sighs, he looks away before making eye contact with Neytiri. He finally places the gun down. It’s been hard on for the last of couple years, more since the sky people arrived. He almost lost you, and he didn’t know how he would’ve felt losing you. It’s one thing acting like strangers but another when he almost lost you.

“I thought I lost them. I thought I lost Y/n” Jake whispers. His eyes big, watery and filled with so much pain. Neytiri sighs softly before reaching out for Jake’s hand

“Hey” Spider softly calls you.

You’re in your own Kelku once your grandmother finished on your wounds. You were carving an arrow when you heard Spider’s light footsteps enter.

“Hey” you smile as you place your arrow and hunting knife besides you.

“What’s up?”

“I wanted to check on you” you notice how Spider fidgets with his hands. You have a feelings on what’s really bothering him. You sigh as you stood up.

“Spider… I’m fine” you tell him softly, you place your hand on his dreads.

“But you could’ve…” Spider couldn’t finish his sentence, he couldn’t bare the thought of losing you.

“Look at me” you kneel down, you grab the bottoms of his mask and gently pick his head up. Spider’s eyes were red and watery.

“Oh Spider” you pull him into your chest, hugging him. Spider instantly wraps his arms around your midsection, hugging tightly. Spider couldn’t hold back his sobs. You gently shush him.

“I promised I would be back. Didn’t I?” You try to lighten the mood, you try to pull away to look at him but Spider resists, not wanting to let you go.

“Spider. You are my heart, my soul, my world, my best friend, and my everything” you promise softly.

“I love you, Y/n” Spider muffled voice say. You softly smile as you lean down and peck his hair.

“I love you brother”

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#spider x reader #recom miles quaritch #miles quaritch x reader #recom lyle wainfleet #lyle wainfleet x reader #sully reader #polyamourous #polyamory #throuple #miles quaritch x reader x lyle wainfleet #I wanna be yours

[eddiemunsons80sbaby]

Never Say Never

Chapter 10

Pairing: SingleDad!StevexReader

Summary: You are a 32 year old single mother, raising your seven year old son on your own. After being widowed at 30 and going out on awful dates with disgusting men for the past month, you have decided that you're giving up. You already had your great love. One person can't possibly get lucky enough to have two in their lifetime. But then your son starts playing baseball and the coach might just change your mind about that.

No posting schedule.

18+ only for eventual smut

Word Count: 9.3K

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

“Wow,” Robin breathed, her eyes so wide Steve feared they would pop out of her head, her spoon of cereal paused in front of the perfect circle her mouth was currently making. “That good, huh?”

“Better than good. I don’t…shit, I don’t even know how to describe it,” Steve replied, arms dropping to the table. “I’ve…Robin, I have never felt anything like that before. It was incredible and so damn intense. I don’t…I don’t know if I can have any self-control now that I know what kissing her feels like and I have to have self-control with her. That kiss is all I’ve been able to think about. It’s all I want to do. I had to stop myself from driving to her work today just to see her and touch her again. I think I might be losing my mind.”

Everything about last night had been perfect. From the food to the conversation to the girl. He knew he liked you. He knew he liked you a lot. He’d known he wanted to kiss you from the moment he’d laid eyes on you but nothing could have prepared him for what it was actually like. The moment his lips touched yours it was like sticking his finger in an electrical socket. You consumed him. It felt like you were everywhere at once, completely overwhelming every one of his senses until you were all that existed. 

Steve was not new to kissing. In fact his track record was probably far higher than most but he’d never had a kiss like that. That kiss made all other kisses seem pointless. Why would he ever waste his lips on anything that wasn’t as amazing as that? And now all he could think about was your lips and your skin and how much more he wanted to explore. He was completely done for and that was scary as hell.

Robin giggled, her spoon clinking as she dropped it into the bowl, “Oh, my sweet summer child, you have got it so bad.”

“I know! What do I do?” he pleaded desperately.

The blond shrugged, her foot coming up to rest on the seat of the chair, arm wrapping around her leg, “Why would you want to do anything? Go with it. Savor it. Enjoy the hell out of it. Kiss that woman silly.”

“Robs, this isn’t funny.”

“I’m not saying it’s funny. Steve, it’s amazing. I’ve never seen you so over the moon. I mean, yeah, you fall hard and fast but it’s all just a show. I’ve never seen you this lovestruck, my friend. You give new meaning to the term stars in his eyes.”

“But I told her it was no pressure. I said it wouldn’t be a big deal if it didn’t work out and now it feels like a very big deal! How am I supposed to go back to the way things were now that I know how goddamn good she feels?”

Blue eyes widened as she leaned forward, “Whoa. How good she feels? I thought all you did was kiss.”

“That is all we did!” he huffed. “But I’d be lying if I said I haven’t been thinking about how so many other things would feel with her. But that’s a huge step, right? I mean, if I sleep with her then there is definitely no going back. It would be too awkward. And then what about the boys? I will shatter Jere’s heart when I tell him Eli’s mom and I can’t be around each other anymore. And what about…”

“Whoa! Hold your horses there cowboy. You’re getting just a bit ahead of yourself, don’t you think? Why are you already planning on all of this going south? Obviously, you two had an amazing time together and a kiss that could launch a thousand ships or some shit. Why would you think this isn’t going to be something?”

“Because it’s me!”

“And?”

“And I can’t ever make anything work. I am King Steve alright, the king of failed relationships.”

“Or…and hear me out, you’ve only had failed relationships because you’ve picked the wrong girls. She doesn’t sound like the wrong girl. I mean, honestly, did you ever have a kiss with Nance that made you feel like that?”

“No, but you know me. I’m going to push too hard, too fast, and she’s going to get freaked out and run. Look at me. Already I want to race over and see her even though I am seeing her tomorrow. Hell, I wanted to turn around and drive back to kiss her senseless all over again the moment I pulled away. I’m going to do it, Robin. I’m going to be too much. I can already feel it.”

“Okay,” shrugged Robin. Inhaling, she dropped her leg to the floor, arms crossing on top of the table. “Say you do what you do and you’re really needy and smothering and make it so she feels like she can’t breathe. Steve, we’re talking about a girl who lost her husband, a girl who has been alone for two years, a girl who hasn’t had anyone to care for her. Do you think she’ll find it smothering or do you think she’ll find it refreshing? Maybe she doesn’t even like breathing. Maybe what she wants is a Steve sized pillow right over her mouth and…” She cringed, lips puckering. “Okay, eww. I am realizing how that sounds but you know what I mean. Hell, maybe she does want that too.”

“But what if…”

“What if? What if? What if the Earth implodes tomorrow or aliens finally make themselves known and attack us all? Steve, you could go through the what ifs all damn day if you want but we both know all you’re really doing is grasping at shit because you’re scared.”

“Scared?” he scoffed, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. “I’m not scared. I just don’t want to make an ass of myself.”

“No. You’re scared. Terrified with a capital ‘T’ because King Steve has had a ton of relationships, more than is actually acceptable for the common person if we’re being honest. But what you’ve never had is anything real and that scares the shit out of you. Because if it’s real then that means there’s very real potential for losing it. But you have to stop focusing on what could happen and start focusing on what is happening right now. Because from what I’m hearing, she is just as deep into this as you are. It doesn’t sound like she was trying to stop the kiss which tells me she wants it. So just go with it. Go with the moment, with what you feel because yeah, it could all go to shit in a month. But it could also be your happy ending, Steve and you have to stop thinking you don’t deserve it or that it’s not possible for you because you, my friend, are worthy of all that shit they write about in romance novels.”

He was scared. He was scared shitless because there were a million and one ways he could manage to royally fuck this whole thing up. He was the king of fuck-ups when it came to relationships. And you were the first one that felt like it was something, something more than just a companion, something more than just someone he wanted around so he didn’t have to be alone. 

“Hey Steve!” came Dustin’s voice, the front door banging against the wall, making Steve swear because how many times had he told that kid not to do that? He’d already patched that spot twice because of him. “You got anything for breakfast? I’m all out of Cinnamon Toa…” He paused in the doorway when he took in the sight of Steve and Robin at the table. “Sorry. This looks serious.” His face lit up, finger pointing at Robin’s bowl. “Sweet. Exactly what I needed.” Pulling the bowl over, he dropped down between the two of them.

“By all means,” Robin snapped. “I wasn’t eating that or anything.”

“Don’t you have your own house with your own food?” Steve sighed. 

“Well, yes I do,” replied Dustin, scooping milk and cereal into his mouth, “but I am all out of cereal.”

“You know, there’s this place that all your breakfast needs. It’s called the grocery store.”

“Yeah, but you’re only a block away. Why would I drive all the way to the store when I can just come over here where there’s always food?”

“Because it’s my food,” argued Steve, jabbing his pointer finger repeatedly into the table. “It’s my food that I buy for me and my son to eat and it’s my house and it’s my table and it’s my bowl and spoon.”

“Damn. Someone’s grouchy today.” Dustin rolled his eyes toward Robin. “What’s up his butt?”

“Hot widow.”

“Impressive. That’s quite a leap from barely being able to tell her you like her.”

“Come on, man.” Steve wadded up a napkin, throwing it at his face. “I told you not to talk about my sex life.”

“So there is a sex life to talk about?”

Robin sniggered, “Based on how last night went there will be shortly.”

“Ohh!” Full teeth on display, he wiggled his eyebrows at Steve. “Do tell. More than dinner was enjoyed last night? Maybe a little late night dessert? A little something sweet after the meal? A little…”

“No. Absolutely not. I am not talking about this with a child,” Steve snorted, arms flailing in the air as he rose from the table. Grabbing onto the bowl that had been Robin’s before Dustin had stolen it, he walked it over to the sink, rinsing the remains of cereal and milk into the garbage disposal.

“Dude, I was still eating that! And I am not a child,” protested Dustin. “I am twenty-six! I have not been a child for eight years.”

Robin ruffled his hair. “You’ll always be itty bitty Dusty-Bun to us.”

“Knock it off. Jesus, seriously, you two have got to realize I am a man now. I am not unknown to the ways of carnal enjoyments. You’re not going to tell me anything I don’t already know. Seriously, did you and her hook up?”

“No! We just kissed, okay?” 

Steve spun, leaning against the sink, fingers wrapping around the edge. He glanced over at the clock. Normally he would be leaving now to pick up Jeremiah from school to start his few days with him but Nancy would be getting him today. She was keeping him for the night because it was her dad’s birthday and they were all going out to dinner. 

He had a whole evening ahead of him with nothing to occupy his thoughts and that was dangerous. Because his thoughts could lead him right to your doorstep. He hadn’t been exaggerating. Twice he’d had to convince himself that it would be ridiculous for him to show up when you had plans to see each other Thursday. Twice he’d been ready to turn his car right instead of left simply because he wanted to see your face. But his fear of doing what he always did, getting clingy, stopped him. 

Steve had always been clingy in relationships. He had this neurotic need to feel important, to feel needed, to feel wanted. Robin told him his lack of parental love as a child left him constantly seeking it out in others. It was annoying how well she could read him but it didn’t make her wrong. And this time was so much worse. The intensity of his feelings was magnified by a hundred and if he wasn’t careful, he was going to be the pillow that smothered this relationship before it even began. 

“It didn’t sound like just any old kiss to me,” Robin mused, opening the refrigerator to pull out a can of Dr. Pepper, something he only kept in the house because she drank it and she was always there. “It sounded like the kind of kiss that leads to all of the other dirty, delicious things.” Lifting her eyebrows, she nodded toward Dustin. “They were pawing at each other like a couple of horny teenagers in that car.”

“Steve! How very…junior year Steve of you. Which, I mean, that Steve was a douche but in this case, I approve,” Dustin laughed, only annoying him further. “And she was into it? I mean, obviously. Aren’t you two seeing each other tomorrow?”

“They are. They’re baking together for the school carnival.”

“Baking? Seriously?” He cringed at Steve. “How is that even slightly sexy?”

“Are you kidding me? The kids will be at school. They will have the whole house to themselves.” Pushing off the fridge, Robin’s hands wove in front of her as if she were setting a scene for a play. “Picture it. They’re mixing up ingredients and oops, some just happens to get on her neck. What to do? The only obvious conclusion is for Steve to lick it off.”

“Oh! Yeah and once you get tongues involved…” A husky laugh rose up out of Dustin, causing Steve a lot of unease. He did not appreciate this side of Dustin, the kid he used to give advice to for how to talk to girls. Dustin and tongues did not mix and was not an image he wanted in his brain. “That’s hot.”

“It’s not hot,” he stated, turning back to the dishes in the sink. “It’s not. We are two parents who volunteered to help bake for the carnival and…”

“Yeah. One of them who can’t bake and only chose that option to spend more time with the girl of his dreams,” Robin reminded.

“Yeah. I did,” he admitted, squeezing far more dish soap onto the sponge than was necessary in his irritation. “But I didn’t do it to get lucky or whatever. I did it just so we can spend time together. We’ve been on one date. She’s a widow. I mean, Jesus. We’re just getting to know each other. Nothing like that is happening for a long time.”

“Sure. If you say so,” Dustin snorted and Steve had had more than enough. He grabbed the sprayer from the sink, pulling it as far as it would go, shooting water right at his face. The boy’s hands flew up as he yelled, wiping the droplets off his skin. “Damn! That was unnecessary, Steve!”

“It was very necessary. Stop talking about my sex life. One, it gives me the ick to hear you talking about sex at all. You shouldn’t know anything about it. As far as I am concerned, you’ve never done it and I don’t want to know otherwise. And two, it’s not happening.” At Robin and Dustin’s disbelieving look, he sighed. “It’s not. Nothing is happening tomorrow. Seriously.”

____________________________________________________________

You moved throughout the house, laundry basket tucked under your arm, as you did your nightly pick-up of Eli’s various toys and clothes that had managed to be strewn everywhere. A random sock that had been deposited while he was eating his after school snack, the Hot Wheels car that had raced on an epic journey down the steps and then been abandoned at the base of them, the stuffed giraffe forgotten on the couch as he’d fumbled half asleep upstairs for bedtime. 

Depositing the basket next to the stairs to be dealt with tomorrow morning, you made your way into the kitchen. You grabbed the bottle of Malbec that you'd picked up at the store earlier and poured yourself a generous glass before making your way toward the living room, pausing at the door frame, your eyes trailing the little pencil lines that documented your son’s growth through the years. 

Your finger traced the one that said, Eli, 5 years old, the last time that Justin had been the one to do it. You could see the moment so clearly, the light in your son’s eyes as his dad gasped, marveling at how much he’d grown since last year, asking him if he’d been sneaking spinach when they weren’t looking. Eli had giggled as Justin had hoisted him into the air, exclaiming that he was going to be bigger than him, something her son could not fathom as his father always seemed larger than life. 

“I miss you,” you whispered, closing your eyes, tears burning the backs of your eyelids. 

You hoped he could hear you, somehow, someway, through the span of time and space and death. You hoped he knew how much you missed him, how much Eli missed his dad. You hoped that he knew that there wasn’t a day that went by where you didn’t think of him and wished that things had gone differently. 

Your feet led you into the living room and you collapsed on the couch, your head resting along the back. You'd never once asked Justin to give up the military. Not when you were dating, not when you got married, not even when you found out you were pregnant or after your son had arrived. You'd always known how much the job meant to him. He wouldn’t have been your Justin if he’d walked away.

No. You'd always accepted it was just a part of him like the color of his hair or the way he rose before the sun no matter what time he went to bed. He was a soldier and that was it. There was no speculating on that, no room for compromise. To ask him to quit would have been like asking him to give up his soul. 

You'd worried. Of course you had. You knew it was a possibility but he always came home to you…until he didn’t. 

Even knowing it’s a possibility never actually prepares you for the real thing. Yeah, you knew it could happen, that at any moment something could go wrong when your husband was heading into hostile areas. But you never actually entertained the thought. He was the other half of you. You couldn’t possibly survive without him so he had to keep coming home to you. 

And how could you not have known when it happened? If your souls were linked, if you were connected the way you believed you were, why didn’t you feel it when he’d left this Earth? Surely there should have been some pain, some ache, some sign from the Universe that the other half of your heart had been destroyed.

But you'd known nothing. You'd woken to your alarm, made breakfast, gotten Eli ready and dropped him off at school. You'd stopped at the grocery store and chatted with Nick, the cashier, like it was any other Tuesday. He’d told you that he was heading to Stanford the following fall for Mathematics and Statistics. You'd come home and started the laundry. You were just plugging in the vacuum when the knock at the door came. How could you have been sweeping when a piece of your very soul had been destroyed?  

How could you have been sitting in your living room, sharing a glass of wine and laughing with Janice, when your husband was bleeding out half a world away? You'd focused on that for so long when you'd found out when he died. You'd hated yourself for it, for enjoying life, for having a laugh, while he lay suffering so far from his family. 

The ring of the phone jolted you from your thoughts. Blinking, you set your wineglass down on the coffee table and padded, barefoot, to grab the cordless from its stand by the television before the ringing woke up Eli.

“Hello?”

“Hi honey. It’s not too late to call, is it? I was going to call you earlier but your dad invited Jerry and Susanne over without telling me and I just got them out of my house. They just bought a camper and once we got on that subject, they would not shut up about it. They had to tell us about all the bells and whistles it’s got and all the places they’re going to see. Good grief. It’s just an extra-large tent, you know.”

“A tent doesn’t have a running bathroom.”

You smiled, dropping back onto the couch, lifting your glass to your mouth as you listened to your mom rant for ten more minutes about this couple. 

“Your dad met him at the golf course and, of course, now I’m stuck with not only him but his braggy wife. Now she wants to have lunch next week. She wants to tell me all about the pool they’re having put in this summer and the kitchen remodel they did last year. Please. I hate people who show off. Money doesn’t make anybody better than anyone else. Money can’t buy you manners or a kind heart.”

“No, you’re right about that. But come on, mom. Don’t you think it would be nice to get out of the house and go to lunch? You just met the lady. She might have been trying to impress you. Give her a chance.”

“Oh, don’t you start, too. Your dad’s been saying the same thing. Susanne loves reading romance novels just like you. You should invite her to your book club. You two have so much in common. Just give her a chance.” You could hear your mother’s eyes roll through the phone. “Maybe I don’t want to give her a chance. I have plenty of my own friends.”

“But dad doesn’t.”

A loud sigh came down the line, “I know he doesn’t. Anyway, how are you and that beautiful grandson of mine?”

“We’re both really good.”

Your mom went silent which was never a good sign. 

“Mom?”

“Really? That’s intriguing.”

“What’s intriguing?”

“The emphasis you just put on really.”

“I did not emphasize really,” you sighed, heading falling against the back of the couch. 

“You absolutely did. So what is the reason for this over-emphasized really?”

“Mom…”

“Oh, come on. Something’s changed since the last time we talked. And it’s something good by the sound of it. Is it so bad that I want to know what made my daughter so happy?”

“You’re very nosy, did you know that?”

“I do but also, you’re my child so I am allowed. If I can’t prod into every part of your life, then whose can I? Besides, it’s been far too long since I’ve heard that little…what word am I looking for? Delighted. You sound delighted. Exhilarated even. Dare I say exuberant? Effervescent?”

“Just because you teach creative writing at a university doesn’t mean you have to throw the thesaurus at me. I am not one of your students.”

“Darling, come on. Tell me what’s got you sounding happy for the first time in years. I can keep going. You sound jubilant, joyous, lighthearted…”

“Oh my god, stop,” you laughed, running your palm over your forehead. “Okay. If you must know, there might be a person…”

“A person? And is this person of the male persuasion?”

“Maybe.”

“And how did you meet this person who may or may not have a penis?”

“Mom!” 

“Basic anatomy dear. It’s not that scandalous.”

“Jesus. You’re just as bad as Janice.” How you'd managed to be a product of your mother was beyond you, especially when your dad wasn’t much better. Both of them just said whatever they wanted, consequences be damned. “He is Eli’s little league coach. That’s how we met. Eli and his son, Jeremiah, became best friends this year at school and it started with just trying to get a playdate together. But then, because of the boys, we’ve been spending a lot of time together and he asked me on a date. We went out to dinner last night.”

“And?”

“And what?”

Your mother snorted and you could picture her face so clearly, the sound bringing back every time you'd tried to avoid a conversation when you were younger. When her mom asked about your crush on Elliot in junior high. When she’d tried to get you to share about your prom night. When you'd come home crying after Jessica Finch had told everyone you'd given blowjobs to half the basketball team. Your mother always knew and she always managed to dig it out of you no matter how hard you tried to resist. There was no resisting Sally Madden when she was on an information gathering mission. 

“How did it go?”

“It was…perfect? I mean, it was amazing. He’s such a good guy, mom. He’s ridiculously good looking.”

“Oh! Describe him for me.”

You sat forward, crossing your legs, setting your empty glass on the table. How to describe Steve? It felt like there weren’t the words to accurately depict how beautiful he truly was. 

“Okay. Well, he’s just under six feet. He has this chestnut colored hair. It’s so thick and it’s longer but not too long. It’s the kind of hair that most girls would kill for. He has hazel eyes and I swear, every color is in them. Sometimes they’re more green, sometimes more golden, sometimes more brown. It’s like they change with his moods. And his smile…his smile is like the sun. It’s so bright and beautiful and you just can’t help but smile too. And he has these adorable little moles on his face and neck. And he’s fit, you know, but not, like, too fit. He’s not all muscly but he definitely takes care of himself. His hands are huge. They could swallow my entire head but he’s so gentle. Oh, and his chest hair…I didn’t even know I had a thing for chest hair but apparently I do.”

Your mom giggled and your face flushed. You hadn’t meant to quite share all of that but once you began, it all just came spilling out. Had you really just talked about Steve’s chest hair with your mother? You could envision your mom’s feet kicking in glee, overjoyed that you had shared so much with her.

“Mom, please don’t make this a bigger deal than it is,” you pleaded. “We’ve only gone on one date and I have no idea where it’s going. It might be nothing.”

“I’m not making anything bigger than it is. Honey, you sound so happy. It is absolutely a big deal. It’s the biggest deal. Oh, I can’t wait to meet this guy who has made my girl sound like she’s truly living for the first time since Justin.”

That familiar knot of guilt coiled inside of you at your husband’s name. You rotated your ankles, willing away any kind of anxiety. It was okay. You were allowed to be happy. At least that’s what everyone kept telling you and if you shared how you were feeling with your mother, she would tell you the same thing. There was no point in rehashing it again. 

“Mom, it’s really not yet. It might not even be anything.”

“You know, we were talking about coming for a visit. This could be the perfect time.”

“Oh no. Wait…”

“Oh honey, I can’t wait to meet him. I can already tell by the way you sound that he’s incredible. And he sounds so dreamy but then, you’ve always had good taste. Maybe we could plan a trip for next month. Your dad wants to catch one of Eli’s games anyway.”

Oh god. Your stomach rolled, your eyes darting to find something to focus on. The clock on the wall, the steady tick of the second hand. The ashtray on the coffee table that Eli had made for you last year even though you didn’t smoke. Your red pumps sitting by the door, discarded after a long day at work. 

No. Your mom swooping in, fawning all over Steve, and inflating this into something much larger than it was…that was the last thing you needed. Sounds…you needed sounds. Any sounds that were not your mother screeching in your ear. 

“Mom, I have to go.”

“Oh, but sweetie…”

“No. I need to go,” you gasped, struggling to find air. 

“Honey, is it happening?”

“It’s ok. I’ve got control of it but I need to get off the phone.”

“Okay but if you…”

“Bye mom.”

You slammed the phone down, closing your eyes, going inward. The tick of the clock, the sound of someone’s radio playing next door, the hum of the washing machine. You wiggled your fingers, nodded your head, and tapped your foot. 

It was under control. You were in control. You could do this. If your parents came it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Besides, you would love to see them. The last time you'd seen them had been Christmas and Eli would be overjoyed that they were visiting. You would have to give Steve fair warning before then. Yeah. That wouldn’t be awkward at all. 

____________________________________________________________

Steve ran damp palms down the front of his jeans as he approached your house the next morning. You'd told him to be there by eleven so they would have plenty of time to get the baking done before the boys had to be picked up from school. Looking at his watch it was 10:56. He was right on time. 

Of course, that could be because of how stressed he’d been this morning. After dropping off Jeremiah, he had called in to the office just to check in and make sure everything was set for the day. As soon as you had offered to let him come and bake with you, he rearranged his schedule, moving a meeting to tomorrow and asking Gerry to do the rounds of some of the job sites. But still, it was his responsibility, and he just wanted the assurance that all would run smoothly and he wouldn’t receive any calls interrupting their time together. 

Gerry was great but he’d only been with the company for six months and often called just to double check decisions with Steve. His self-confidence was lacking. Steve had assured him that he could make the calls today, making it abundantly clear that he didn’t want to be bothered for the day unless it was a life-or-death emergency. Nothing would burst the bubble of a new relationship faster than constant distractions. 

He’d spent the two hours after that pacing, checking the clock, heading into the bathroom to make sure he looked okay, changing his shirt, anxiously waiting for it to be time to leave. On more than one occasion he’d grabbed his keys, thinking he’d just show up early but stopped himself, not wanting to seem too eager. But he was. He’d thought of nothing but you since your date, seeing your face, hearing your laugh, getting to taste those perfectly sweet lips again. 

You had even invaded his dreams in the very best way possible. After a rather vivid dream of you underneath him, his name falling from your lips as you urged him on over and over, he’d had to take matters into his own hands this morning to relieve the throbbing hard-on he’d opened his eyes to. His hand moving over his length, picturing you in his mind, those pink lips and beautiful eyes, your dainty hand stroking him to release. 

Fuck. Steve shook it off. He had to stop. He was not going to be able to control himself from making a move if he didn’t. It was hard enough to not touch you or kiss you when the boys were around and now, they were going to be completely alone in your house. That opened far too many possibilities and he didn’t want to push you too fast. He feared if the two of you made a move you weren't really ready for, then you would retreat, pull away from him, and this would be over before it really began. 

Bracing himself, he lifted his fist and rapped on the door three times. He could do this. He could control these urges. He wasn’t a fucking pre-teen anymore who didn’t know what to do with a boner. He had this completely under control.

But then the door opened and no, he absolutely did not because there you stood, looking so damn enticing and all he could focus on were those perfect pink lips, currently curved up on both sides in the most delicious looking smile, and he was overcome with the urge to shove you against the wall and kiss you senseless. 

“Hey! Right on time,” you beamed, waving your hand in invitation. “Come on in. I’ve got the kitchen all set up for us.”

“Great,” he replied, thinking you didn’t have the kitchen set up for what he actually wanted to be doing. “I am going to apologize now because I really am very bad at this. I don’t know how much help I’ll be. I may have just signed you up for double duty.”

You shrugged, bouncing barefoot, your toenails a bright sky blue, into the kitchen. The counter space was absolutely covered with mixing bowls, baking pans, containers of baking ingredients, and tupperware just waiting to hold sweet treats. 

“Not a big deal. I actually love to bake. I’ve been doing it since I was a kid.”

“With your mom?”

“Oh god no,” you snorted, grabbing the container that looked like flour. “My mom would burn the house down if she tried to bake. She can’t cook, either. She hates the kitchen. If it weren’t for my dad, we would have lived off of take-out. No. I baked with my grandma. I used to spend most weekends with her when I was a kid and she always had something in the oven.”

“That’s cute. I can just picture little you, nose all dusted with flour. She never taught your mom?”

“Grandma on my dad’s side,” you explained. “We’re going to start off with basic rice krispie treats. Every kid loves a rice krispie treat.” At his skeptical expression, you laughed, sliding the recipe card toward him. “I promise. You can’t mess it up. It’s not even really baking. Nothing has to go in the oven.”

“You have far too much faith in me,” Steve told you, glancing down at the card. 

“You just melt the butter and then add the marshmallows. The trick is to keep stirring it until the marshmallows are completely melted. Then you add the mixture to the Rice Krispies, spread it in the pan, let it cool, and voila, you have a yummy treat. I mean, anyone can do that.”

“You clearly haven’t met me. I can grill any kind of meat you want but baking…but we’ll see. I’ll give it a go.”

He set to work on the Rice Krispie Treats, grabbing a saucepan and a stick of butter. He turned the burner on low, watching as you began measuring and dumping ingredients into a bowl. 

“And what are you making?”

“I am making my grandma’s famous strawberry crumb bars,” you answered. 

“Ahh. So, does your mom’s mom not like to cook or bake either?” he asked, swirling a spatula through the butter gently. 

“My grandma on my mom’s side doesn’t like anything,” you laughed harshly. “She’s a miserable woman who made my mom’s childhood hell. She got pregnant at twenty-two and the guy took off. She’s never told my mom who her dad is. I guess she never wanted kids and so she just acted like she didn’t have one. My mom practically raised herself, which is why she has no idea how to cook. She lived off of cereal and canned soup, whatever she could find because her mom went out most nights leaving her alone. She doesn’t speak to her and neither do I.”

“Damn, that really sucks for you and your mom. I’m sorry.”

You shrugged, stirring the ingredients in the bowl. “It doesn’t really bother me. I never went without. It bothers me for my mom. It does suck. It sucks that she never had anyone to call about all the crazy shit that happens in life. I don’t know what I’d do without my mom. She drives me nuts but she’s my best friend, you know?”

“No,” he chuckled awkwardly, dumping marshmallows into the pan. “I actually don’t. I’m more like your mom, remember? Hell, I may as well be an orphan at this point. I haven’t seen my parents in years. They didn’t even come up to the hospital to see Jere when he was born. My mom saw him once, when he was four months old.”

“Jesus…that…Steve, I don’t even have words for that. How does a mother do that? How can they not want to see their own grandchild?”

“Probably because they don’t want to see me,” he answered, cringing as he attempted to stir the cereal into the sticky mixture. It did not want to mix and he had to give it some real elbow grease to get it to start blending together. “I’m a massive disappointment. I didn’t go to college. I didn’t follow in my dad’s footsteps and according to them, I married down and now I am reaping what I sowed. Like they’re the glowing example of a successful marriage. Staying together doesn’t mean it’s successful, especially when you can barely stand each other.”

You slid by him as he carried the bowl to the counter and you transferred your bars to the oven. Closing the door, you spun, hands braced on the handle. 

“You know they’re wrong, don’t you?”

“What?” he asked, becoming frustrated as the gooey concoction fought back, not wanting to leave the spatula to transfer into the pan. 

“Your parents. They’re wrong. Any parent who wouldn’t be proud as hell to have raised someone like you is completely out of their mind.”

“I think you give me far more credit than I deserve.” Steve groaned, shaking his hand as the marshmallow mixture stuck to his fingers when he tried to press it out of the bowl and into the pan. 

“You don’t give yourself enough credit,” you chuckled, grabbing the butter. “Here. Hang on.” You spread the butter lightly over the spatula, easily spooning the rest into the pan and then spread it over the top to even it out. “You don’t see what everyone else does.”

“I mean, it’s not like I’m not proud of where I’m at. I know I’ve done okay for myself. And I wouldn’t trade a single part of my life for the one they wanted for me.” Steve moved to the sink, squirting soap onto his hands, scrubbing at the sticky mess he’d become. “I just worry that you have this image in your head of me and you’re going to wind up sorely disappointed when I can’t live up to it.”

“Oh Steve, you’ve already far exceeded it. You don’t have to try as hard as you think.”

A shudder ran through him at the closeness of your voice. He grabbed the dish towel that was folded next to the sink, drying his hands as he turned to you, resting against the counter. You were right in front of him, those beautiful eyes filled with just as much desire as he was currently feeling. Was it real or was he just imagining it? Did you want this as badly as he did?

“I want to kiss you again. Jesus Christ, I’ve wanted to kiss you silly since you opened that door,” he stated boldly and you stepped into him, pulling the dish towel from his hands, tossing it back onto the counter. 

“So what’s stopping you?”

That was all the confirmation he needed and then his hands were on your face, his mouth descending on yours. His entire body sagged as if in sweet relief, releasing the breath he’d been holding since he’d arrived. He felt like a parched man who’d finally received a drink of water, the very essence of life seeping into every pore of his being. 

His hands moved to your hips as yours tangled in his hair and he pressed you back into the island, his lips never leaving yours. A moan vibrated from your body to his and the aftershocks of it shot straight to his cock. Fuck, he wanted you so badly. He wanted to taste every single goddamn inch of this woman, to run his hands over your bare skin, to watch as you unraveled before him. He wanted to worship at your goddamn feet. It was becoming harder to remember why he needed to wait. 

It was made damn near impossible when you pressed back against him, your bodies colliding against the sink once again. Your lips broke from his and you gasped his name when his thigh came between your legs. You rocked forward against it and any sense of self-control he had snapped. He had to make you say his name again and again. He wanted to memorize you, to find out exactly what made you feel good, and then watch you come undone when he did just that. 

“Jesus Christ,” he groaned, your hips rolling as you sought out the pressure of his jean-clad thigh. 

Keeping one hand on your hip, his other slid into your hair, cupping the back of your neck. He finally allowed himself to explore more of you. His nose traced the line of your throat, his tongue following, relishing the shiver that raced over your skin as he did so. He sucked the lobe of your ear between his lips, reminding himself you were crossing over a dangerous line, one he wouldn’t be able to stop at soon. 

“Honey…if we don’t stop now…I don’t know if I’ll be able to,” he rasped when your fingers dug into his back. “Fuck, I want you. I want you so badly right now but if you don’t want this…”

____________________________________________________________

His words filtered through the fog of desire that had you completely lust drunk. Did you want this? God, you wanted this. Your body was craving this. You wanted all these stupid clothes out of the way. You wanted no barriers between them. You wanted him in a way you hadn’t wanted anything in far too long. Was it stupid? Maybe, but you couldn’t bring yourself to think rationally right now. The repercussions of this were a problem for later you to deal with. 

“I want this,” you choked out. “I want you.”

He groaned and then his hands were pulling your shirt over your head, his eyes hungry as they roamed over your chest, the pink lacy bra you'd put on as you'd tried to convince yourself it wasn’t for a reason when in reality it was for this exact reason. 

“You are so beautiful, honey.”

You needed to see him too. You pulled at the hem of his shirt and he reached for it impatiently, pulling it up and over his head, dropping it to the floor. Jesus. Your eyes raked over every tiny mole, the mass of dark hair that coated his chest, tapering into a line that disappeared under the waist of his jeans. 

“You too,” you murmured, entranced, your hand moving as if on its own, fingers slipping through the coarse hairs, following the line down his abdomen. You watched as his eyes slipped closed, felt the shudder that ran over his stomach, the muscles going taut, at your touch. 

That soft smile, those warm eyes, threatened to melt you just like the butter on the stove. His fingers slipped under the straps of your bra, his eyes locked on yours as if asking for your permission. Your teeth raked your bottom lip. You nodded, feeling the silky straps slip over your biceps and down your arms. Then his fingers were brushing the curve of your breasts and he was gently pulling the lace away from you, exposing your nipples, already hard little pebbles. 

“I just want to taste every single inch of your skin,” Steve whispered, the backs of his hands tracing the mounded flesh, ripples of anticipation coursing through you. He stepped into you, forcing you to step back. “Is that alright, beautiful girl?”

“Yes…”

Then his lips were wrapping around your nipple and your hand was in his hair, eyes rolling back in your head, your back arching against the island. He nibbled, licked, and suckled before his tongue glided over your skin, providing the same attention to the other. Your body was absolutely humming under his attention and when his fingers found the button on your pants, you trembled with the expectation of what was to come. 

“This okay?” he mumbled against your skin, face nuzzled between your breasts. 

“Uh-huh…” you whimpered, losing yourself in the feel of those stupidly soft lips moving lower, open mouthed kisses pressed against every single bare inch of you while his fingers worked your button and zipper. 

His thumbs hooked in your belt loops, dragging your jeans down your legs, his lips taking the time to savor each inch of skin as it was exposed until you thought you would implode with need. Steve’s hand curled around your inner thigh, nudging your legs apart and you obliged, hands gripping the island behind you for dear life. 

He looked up at you and your eyes found his. That was a mistake. As his tongue ran over his lower lip, his eyes darkening, turning a deep chocolate brown, you thought you would come right on the spot. You'd never had anyone look at you with so much desire, not even Justin. But you quickly shut that thought process down because if you let him in right now, you would never be able to go through with this and you wanted this so much right now. You needed this. You needed this like a man who had been starving for days needed a meal. 

Steve leaned forward and then his warm breath caressed the lace of your matching pink panties. You inhaled sharply, eyes slipping closed as his nose ran over the fabric, bumping over exactly where you needed sweet relief. You whimpered softly, hips rolling toward him. His fingers curled into the cloth, pulling it down your legs while his mouth teased, kisses that were far too soft dancing over your inner thighs. 

You lifted one foot and then the other, allowing him to pull them away, your body now completely exposed to him. Steve lips traced a path along the curves of you before they found yours again, his hands working behind your back, sliding bowls and canisters away. Those large hands grasped onto your ass, lifting you up and setting you on the island, your legs dangling over the edge. 

“Lay back for me, honey,” Steve urged, his palm pressing against your breastbone until your back was flush with the formica. His hands slid along your body, fingers digging into the flesh of your hips as his eyes soaked in every inch of you, stopping when they reached your pussy already glistening with need. “Jesus, you are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever laid my eyes on. I can’t believe that I’m the one who gets to touch you…” 

His thumb traced the seam of you and static, nothing but static filled your brain. He slid through your slick and then he was applying pressure where you were aching for it, grazing over the sensitive nub, your hips rocking up to meet his hand. All rational thought was gone. You couldn’t have contemplated anything if you wanted to. The only thing you could focus on was his hand and then his fingers pressing against your entrance before they were inside you, stretching you. 

Your eyes fluttered open to find him focused on your face and you swallowed, hard. He was watching you like you were a painting at the museum and he was trying to interpret your meaning. Like you were an image he was trying to burn into his memory. Your already overheated skin was blazing under his scrutiny. 

“Does that feel good?” he asked, his free hand roaming the length of your torso to palm your breast. “Tell me, honey. Tell me what you need. I want to give you whatever you need.”

You were going to die. You were going to die right here, on your kitchen island, and you would be the happiest woman to do so. This man seriously could not be anymore perfect. The way he kept checking to make sure you were okay, the way he wanted to know just what you wanted. This man couldn’t be real. 

“It’s good…” you gasped. “Jesus, so good.”

“But tell me what you want. Come on. What do you like? Is it this?” He curled his fingers within you and your back arched, a wail of pleasure ripping from within you. Steve smiled, his fingers pressing against that spongy space within you that had your vision going fuzzy. “Yeah. You like that?”

“Yes…I like that…” you shuddered. “Oh my god….Steve…”

“I love when you say my name. Wanna make you say it over and over.”

He dropped to his knees, hands clasping your calves and draping them over his shoulders. A guttural sound, more animal than human, wrenched from your lips when his lips wrapped around your clit, sucking the tiny bud while his fingers continued moving within you. Your hips rocked, your head swiveled, your hands grasping the edges of the island so tightly the wood underneath was digging into your flesh. 

“Steve…” His tongue flicked and fluttered. “Steve…” He circled and swirled. “Steve…” His lips covered it again, pulling it between them tightly, and you screamed, “Steve!”

Your entire body convulsed as trails of fire raced over your skin, the spring that had been coiling tightly within you from the moment his lips found yours finally breaking free. Your vision faded as everything turned white around you and you shattered under the force of your release. 

An overwhelming need to feel every single inch of him overtook you and you shot up just as he was rising to his feet, the evidence of what he’d just done to you shining on his lips and chin. Your hands grasped at his face, pulling him in, the taste of your own pleasure evident on his tongue, only furthering your need for him. 

His hands dropped on either side of you as yours worked at his pants, pushing them and his boxers down over his hips. Pulling your face from his, you looked down, your eyes widening at his girth. The man was even more hung than you'd imagined. Your hand wrapped around the width of him, your fingers and thumb not quite meeting and the muscle in his jaw jumping as he ground his teeth. 

“Fuck, that feels so good,” he growled as you moved your hand along the length of him, stroking from root to tip. 

You watched his face as you stroked him, your thumb rubbing over the tip, spreading the dampness that was already collected there. He was so beautiful. His lips parted as he panted softly, the line of his jaw as hard as stone, his eyes closed, those long lashes resting on his cheekbones. And you were the one who was making him look that way. The very thought was enough to send you over the edge again. 

“Wanna feel you, honey. I want to be inside you. Would that be alright?”

Yes. God, yes. You wanted that too. In answer, you scooted forward, slipping the head of him over your heat, raking your teeth over your lip when he groaned, the sound a rumble that ran right through him. 

“Jesus Christ,” Steve groaned as he pressed into you, pausing to allow your body to get used to his girth. 

Your body stretched for him, welcomed him, as if it had been waiting for him. He pressed further, the movement so slow, until your pelvises were flush together and he was completely buried within you. His hand cradled the back of your head, his forehead pressed to yours, as they stayed still for a moment, just relishing the feel of your bodies connected. 

“Fuck, honey. You feel amazing. You okay?”

“Yeah. I’m good,” you assured, touched that even now he had enough control to worry about you, to take the time to ensure that you were handling him okay. 

His other hand gripped your hip as he began to move, slowly thrusting forward, his cock dragging along your walls, feeling like he was stretching you anew each and every time. He was being so sweet, so gentle with you, but you were craving more. You wanted him to move faster, to thrust harder. You wanted him to take you like you were his, to claim you, because in this moment you wanted nothing more than to belong to Steve. 

His finger brushed your bottom lip, “What do you want, beautiful girl? Tell me.” Like he knew exactly what you were thinking. 

“More…I want more,” you gasped, fingers gripping his firm shoulder blades, nails raking over the skin. “Faster. Harder…more.”

Your body was screaming for it. It had been so long since you'd done this with anyone and your pussy was practically vibrating with excitement to finally be put to good use. 

“Oh yeah?” His palm came to your breastbone again, pressing you back down onto the island. “I told you I would give you anything you want, do anything you want. You want it like this?” 

His hands grabbed onto your hips as he pounded into you, your flesh slapping together, echoing in the space of the kitchen. You cried out his name, your hands wrapping around his forearms to keep yourself from slipping over the counter. 

His hips pistoned relentlessly, giving you exactly what you asked for and that snake in your belly coiled tightly, prepared to strike once again. Gripping his arms, your back bowed, as you tumbled through the stratosphere that was the earth shattering release exploding from within you. 

“Oh fuck…Jesus…you’re so…fuck!”

Steve thrust into you, fingers clenching on the flesh of your hips as he grunted, his release filling you. He sucked down a large gulp of air, sweat glistening along the skin of his forehead and collapsed forward on you, his face pressed between your breasts, cock still nestled within you. 

“Holy fuck…” he gasped, his lips peppering your skin with soft kisses. 

Your fingers slipped into his hair, “Yeah…that’s definitely one way to describe it.” 

You lay there, panting, struggling to come back down from the high you were currently on when your nose wrinkled. You smelled something…wrong. It was an acrid smell, almost smoky. And then your fire alarm began blaring.

“Shit!” you yelled, slapping at his back. “The bars!”

Steve jumped up, slipping out from you and as you leapt from the island, his release slid down your legs. But you couldn’t worry about that when dark smoke was currently billowing out of the oven. 

Steve grabbed onto a pot holder, opening the oven door and pulling the bars that were now a burnt crisp out. He dropped them on top of the stove while you ran to the kitchen window, cracking it open, waving your arms to try to get the smoke out. Steve grabbed the dish towel he’d used earlier and waved it by the smoke detector until it finally stopped its incessant beeping. 

“Holy shit,” you gasped, bent forward and then you burst out laughing at the absurdity of this moment. Both of you, bare ass naked, racing around the kitchen to empty it of smoke. 

“Yeah, holy shit,” he laughed. “I mean, I like to think sex with me is pretty hot but I’ve never almost burned down a kitchen before.”

“So much for the bars.”

He shrugged, slipping up beside you, his arms snaking around your waist, his face nuzzling into your neck. 

“That just means we need to do more baking and I would definitely like to do more baking with you.”

Chapter 11

Taglist: @katethetank@roxiehorrorshow@sapphire4082@bakugouswh0r3@frostandflamesfanfic @mix-matchsocks @mushy-mushroom04 @palmtreesx3 @littlebookworm86 @eddies-trailer-babe @cheesewritings @emilyj444 @daisyhollyxox @angelbabyivy @the-fairy-anon

Thanks so much for taking the time to read my little story! Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist. 😊 And replies and reblogs are always appreciated if you enjoy it. ❤️❤️❤️

Side note: I am getting ready to leave for vacation in a week so it might be a couple weeks before the next chapter drops because I don't plan on writing while I'm gone. But it will be here! Thanks so much for all the support. 😘😘😘

#dad steve harrington #steve harrington #singledad!steveharrington #steve harrington single dad #steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington smut #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington x you #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington imagine #fluff #smut #fluff and smut #romance #second chance romance #second chance at love #widow #divorced dad steve harrington #slow burn #robin buckley #robin and steve #dustin henderson #max mayfield #mike wheeler #eleven hopper

[akkivee]

Intensely Spicy Curry Training: Hypmic Curry Drama Track TL

Kuukou: Y’all sure took your sweet time getting here! I’ve already got everything prepared!

Jyushi: But didn’t you tell us to meet you at the temple?

Hitoya: If we’re making curry, why the hell are we way out in the mountains to do it?

Kuukou: Because I just had a great idea. Check this out!

Jyushi: Ooooh, look at all this meat! So, we’re going to be using all of this in our curry?

Hitoya: Beef and chicken, huh? I guess it would make sense not cook these while inside your temple.

Kuukou: You’re half right, and half wrong.

Jyushi: What do you mean?

Kuukou: I don’t plan to make just any ol’ curry. Now it’s time for the both of y’all to mince the hell out of this meat!!

Hitoya: I didn’t know whether to expect if a corrupt little monk such as yourself knew how to cook, but I’m surprised. Instead of using something pre-made, if we pound and mince the meat ourselves, we’d get a far more superior product. Is that what you were thinking?

Jyushi: Oh, I see! That’s amazing, Kuukou-san!

Hitoya: So, where’d you put the food processor?

Kuukou: Ah?? The hell are you on? You’re grinding this meat with your bare hands.

Jyushi: …Eh?

Kuukou: Jyushi, you’re on beef! Hitoya, you’re taking the chicken! Punch it with everything you’ve got and make minced meat out of it!! This is a new training session I thought up!

Hitoya: What the hell is this fool saying??

Jyushi: B-But there’s so much meat!! Grinding it by hand is impossible!!

Kuukou: I don’t want to hear any complaints!! You don’t know that unless you try!

Jyushi & Hitoya: *reluctantly pounds the meat by hand*

Jyushi: *tearfully* …My body’s going to become minced meat before the actual beef!

Hitoya: Damn it, I can’t believe I let my guard down like this…! I shouldn’t have expected we’d simply make curry…!

Kuukou: You can’t expect to get anywhere with a weak spirit behind weak fists like that!! Lemme show you how it’s done!

Kuukou: *starts punching*

Hitoya: You bastard, those are vegetables!!

Jyushi: E-Even I could mince a tomato by hand!

Kuukou: It doesn’t matter either way!! Whether it’s vegetables or meat, all that matters is the heart you’re putting behind it!!

Jyushi: T-That doesn’t make any sense…!!

Kuukou: “Enlightenment can be attained through one thousand fists!” Don’t just keep yapping and put some energy into your hips and legs too!

Hitoya: Tch, I don’t see any way out of this… Then, I might as well get it over with…!! UWOOOOOOOOOAAAARRRRGHHHH!!!!!!!! *maximum effort punching*

Jyushi: H-Hitoya-san??

Kuukou: Hyahaha! There’s the effort I wanna see!

Jyushi: Guh… Because My God has unshackled the chains binding his true power, I, too, must unlock mine to continue alongside him…! HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!! *maximum effort punching*

-------------------------

Jyushi: I-I can’t move another inch…

Hitoya: Ugh… I can’t even take the cap off my water bottle…

Kuukou: *sighs* It’s pretty pathetic to be that exhausted just from cooking.

Hitoya: You…!!!

Jyushi: But, I think it would be really nice if our training efforts could be felt by those eating our curry…!

Hitoya: …Well, I don’t think I’d say it like that, but I agree with the sentiment.

*the trees rustle and the birds chirp and there is peace*

Kuukou: The fuck are y’all talking about? There’s no point to this if the people who eating aren’t going through training too.

Jyushi: Eh?

Kuukou: Training can only be felt when you grow from the trials you’ve experienced yourself. Hopping off from other people’s efforts won’t mean shit.

Jyushi: B-but I mean, we’ll still be serving the curry to others once it’s finished cooking, right?

Kuukou: Yup. Which is why I’ve got…!

Hitoya: UWAH!! MY EYES!! IT’S IN MY EYES!!

Jyushi: That powder…!!

Hitoya: It’s red chili pepper!! Jyushi, run!! Move upwind so it doesn’t blow and stick to your mucous membrane!!

Jyushi: Eeek!!! *runs away sobbing*

Kuukou: HYAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Hitoya: Kuukou, you bastard, what are you doing? Are you trying to ruin everything we worked on??

Kuukou: I’m not ruining a damn thing! This curry will be spicy so I can provide a remote kind of training!

Hitoya: Stop fucking around!! There’s gotta be a limit!!

Jyushi: *runs back over* I think there’s more chili pepper powder than ingredients now…!!

Kuukou: Then it’s just right! Now try it.

Jyushi: NO!! I will not be eating!! I absolutely refuse!! Don’t even try me!!

Kuukou: Hey stupid, watch it, that’s dangerous!! Stop fighting me and just—Ahh??

Jyushi: T-The inside of the pot is pitch black……!!

Hitoya: Obviously. Chili peppers burn easily. Haah… Let’s just remake the curry.

Jyushi: But doesn’t that mean we’ll have to mince more meat??

Kuukou: Whatever, I was thinking our “Intensely Spicy Curry Training” was made too halfheartedly anyway!! Time to give it all I got and win this championship!!

#kuko harai #jyushi aimono #hitoya amaguni #bad ass temple #hypmic #hypnosis mic #til that you can make a meat paste at the very least by using a mortar and pestle LOL #the curry pissed me tf off lmao it was so spicy but underneath all that spice was a ridiculously flavourful curry #it's spicy enough that i can tell it's comfortably spicy for people used to eating spice tho!! #habenero is the worst experience with spice i ever had and it wasn't that bad lol but i got the sense it could have been #so i assume jyushi and hitoya talked kuukou down lmao or we didn't want a repeat burnt product lol #i decided to tone down how i usually write bat to try and not show my very obvious bias lol hopefully it worked #i remember slug mentioning sometimes a tl will come off vague in order to not get in the way of future developments #and i actually felt that tling this lmao like when hitoya was telling kuukou there's a limit for everything #i had to choose whether to make this about kuukou and training or kuukou and the chili peppers #the statement itself was a vague warning so my own interpretations of bat were getting in the way probably lol #statements without a clear subject usually default to the person speaking so kuukou saying give it everything and win the championship #is me assuming he's talking about himself and again i'm a little worried my own interpretations of bat are getting in the way #since kuukou's self reliance is blatant but also not if you're casually looking at bat SO IDK LOL I THINK TLING IS HARD #curry tl

[purgemarchlockdown]

I'd joke about this interrogation question and how I've written a whole post about her Kazui parallels and how the 0308 parallels are so very real and we have the 020708 + 06 sometimes and that isn't even going into the 0809 parallels and the 050608 family parallels, but also I'd like to take a moment to mention how isolated Amane is actually.

It seems partially self-imposed but even before this she seemed to be the most withdrawn out of all the cast members. Not only does it seem like she was alone before the prison she says herself her upbringing isn't the standard.

Amane: Aren’t we the same? Me and Warden-san. You know, I’m aware that I’m out of the ordinary. That my environment was peculiar, and that everyone [else] is normal.

Amane is so far away from everyone, both physically since in T2 she isn't really willing to talk to anyone. And uh...metaphorically I guess. I don't really know a better word for it.

Amane is so young and the stuff she's experienced is so non-standard I'm not surprised she feels excluded and isolated. Part of a cult's indoctrination process is to isolate it's victims, and the more isolated you are the harder it is to crawl out of it.

Not to mention the ways the other prisoners make her Feel Excluded. Shidou does this often by making her feel Looked Down Upon.

22/10/24 (Shidou’s Birthday)

Amane: ……Kirisaki Shidou. How long do you plan on continuing this foolish behavior? Shidou: I wonder what you might be referring to there. I’m just doing what I need to do. If anything, I’d be happy if you would lend me a hand. Amane: I warned you. I can no longer turn a blind eye to this wickedness taking place right in front of us. You’re bringing ruin unto yourself. Do you understand? Shidou: No, I don’t understand. It’s my job as an adult to teach you that throwing a temper tantrum isn’t going to make everything go your way. If it’s a test of endurance you want, I’m happy to oblige, Amane.

He doesn't Mean to hurt her but it doesn't really change the outcome does it?

Notably the people she talks recently to are the ones that ask her for advice or her opinion. Fuuta has done that multiple times and Yuno did it recently.

23/06/27 (Amane’s Birthday)

Amane: What is it…… Kashiki Yuno. Don’t sit so close to me. Go away. Yuno: Sorry for barging in when you’re getting into your worldview thing. But Mahiru-san’s finally managed to get to sleep. Humour me with some small talk while I take a break. By the way, Amane. Have you ever wished you were never born? I’ve thankfully lived a pretty fun life so far, so haven’t really. But you seem to be struggling with something. So I kinda wondered if you thought like that. Amane: ……I don’t think that. Being born into this world is the first miracle any person experiences, and is something to celebrate. Even if after birth I was put through trial after trial, the value of that will never disappear. Yuno: Hmm. Ok. ……happy birthday, then. It’s good that you were brought into the world, I guess.

It seems like Amane appreciates being listened to and being asked for her opinion, which tracks with things she said in her in the T1 VD.

Amane: I see. Then, are the things that I as a twelve-year-old think irrelevant? Are you going to cast aside the feelings that I know I have in this very moment, purely based on the fact that I have not yet lived for a very long time? Judging these things based on someone’s age will not take you very far. Do I, at age twelve, not have my own will? Does Muu-san, at age 16, have more of a free will than I do? Does Yuno-san, at age 18, have more of a free will? Does Fuuta-san, at age 20, have an entirely free will?

It makes sense to me that she appreciates this, for most of her life it seems her wants and feelings are discarded and considered unimportant.

You might notice this makes Shidou's treatment of her worse. I'm so sorry Shidou but calling her actions a "temper tantrum" was one of the worst things he could of done in this situation. At this point if you get bitten by her it's on you.

(I wonder how much of Amane's hatred of Shidou is because of her cult and how much of it is because of this behavior. Thinking about the 050608 family parallels again...)

Really, no wonder she thinks nobody is like her. The only reason why I can make all these parallels is cause I have access to her magic mind MV and the rest of the material.

Kazui does not know how much Amane lies to protect herself. Amane doesn't know that Mahiru conflates love and pain together. She doesn't even know about Fuuta and Kotoko's crimes for justice! All these people she could relate to and she can't reach out to any of them.

Their so far away from her, it seemed fine in T1 but now the distance is so much bigger now. She's guilty, most of them are innocent, and the ones who are guilty are going through their own pains. Of course nobody is like her, she doesn't know anything about anybody here.

#milgram #amane momose #I got sad okay #cw child abuse #cw cults #milgram thoughts

[popcornforone]

Smash & Nash

A Spooky Season Max Phillips Fan Fic

I know you could say all Max P fics are for spooky season but this one was written especially for it. & considering where I was with this in the 22nd I’m amazed it’s now published. I’ve done good.

Synopsis: Max & You have agreed your turning date, & the day before your mortal wedding you decide to head to fair with attractions & seasonal spooky things. However Max is the one who is having doubt about your arrangement.

Word Count: 4800

Warnings: DO NOT READ IF YOU ARE UNDER 18! Max is a vampire so blood, mentions of death & turning & other vampire lore, piv sex, in public sex, outdoors sex, fingering, drinking while having sex, swearing, being competitive, being angry, hypnosis, manipulation, mentions of oral. Established relationship. Competitiveness

Thanks as always for reading peoples. All feedback is appreciated. Enjoy everyone.

“Step right up to the world famous pumpkin smash, it’s just like a coconut shy but we make pumpkin pie with the smashed pumpkins for the homeless shelter” That’s all it takes. He grips you hand & smiles. A bright white seductive smile.

“Seriously?” You ask as you roll your eyes. “You want to smash pumpkins?”

“Yes I do my forever…” He knows he’s got to charm you into allowing him to do this, he slowly drags his fangs along the back of your hand before he kisses it, threatening you with a potential early feed if he doesn’t get his way. The devil is always in his eyes but tonight the night before Halloween he’s even more mischievous.”I promise not to cheat”

“Urgh alright, fair fight?” You tut. Max is more competitive than you, that’s why you feel for him but being a vampire gave him added advantages. You like him to show off when it’s for your collective benefits but when you’re against each other it gets a bit tedious.

“Always a fair fight my love, ha what does she take me for?” He jokes to the attendant & the man running the game hands you both over 5 balls to smash the pumpkins with.

“If we do this, I get to pick the next thing we do at this autumn fest?” You raise an eyebrow in hope of Max agreement.

This is meant to be your night. The last days of autumn, the clocks have changed. The nights are cold & long & the leaves have all but finished falling. This time next year, if you come to this event, you will be like Max, a creature of the undead. A vampire looking for prey. You’ve agreed on your turning date it’s on November 17th. You will awaken from your transformation & be a creature of the night on your actual birthday of November 30th should everything go to plan.

“Agreed”Max says as he watches your small hands grasp a ball ready to throw. He likes how small your hands are when they stroke his cock, & he is so looking forward for that to now happen for eternity. You are his forever he has been searching for, for over 300 years, which in vampire time is not long. But his last two potential vampire brides died during transformation. He’s taking no risks this time. He’s doing it all properly & is making sure you are the one. So far nothing has gone against either of you it’s all on track & tomorrow at the Halloween feast you attend you will legally become his wife in the eyes of the mortal world.

You eye each other up. Competitive senses at a high. Most pumpkins smashed is the aim of the game & Max being a gentleman lets you go first. The vampire after centuries has still remembered his manners. As the first hit splatters a pumpkin everywhere covering the guy running the stall, you are so proud of yourself. Your pride is wiped away when you see the look on Max face. He’s trying to work out what’s best for him to do.

Easily let you win?

Take you on at his least competitive?

Cheat?

Use his powers?

He’s contemplating them all.

But then he looks at your face. Max the over thinker he can just about in your mind. He shakes his head trying to get out of it, his head conflicted. He’s brought back to the noise & the smells of the fair as you hold his arm.

“Maxie, it doesn’t matter who wins, this is for fun, it’s for charity, if you want to show off do it but I won’t be upset if you beat me” you softly say to him before kissing his cheek. Your lips are still so alive. Your kisses will still feel as good when you’re a vampire, but some of the warmth & the rush of blood will disappear.

“You sure my forever” he nuzzels his nose against yours. The temptation to bite down hard on his bottom lip is difficult to resist but you do.

“Always baby” your right hand trails down his back soothing him as he grabs his first ball to throw. As he does you smack his arse causing his ball to go nowhere near any pumpkin.

“Cheat!” He shouts & holds you close his eyes enraged, starting to show some red flecks in them. You laugh & then do a little mocking strop.

“Oooh im Max Phillips, I’m the only one who can cheat & get away with it” you also hiss at the end, which make Max hiss back & then you hiss more.

“Your hissing is making excellent progress” Max says as you then both continue taking it in turns to smash the pumpkins, each ball by you both taking one completely out & causing a mess.

“You think so?” You reply with a smile, proud he’s noticed. He said you sounded like a stick insect when you started it.

“Only time will tell.” Max chirps as he throws his last ball that takes out the final pumpkin. You high five each other & he pulls you in close for a hug. It doesn’t matter that you both have countless layers on & it’s getting cold, Max can still feel the warmth radiating from you. His nice little snack. He will need to find a new permanent source of food for you both soon.

You hold Max hand as you look at a few things & then you excitedly screech.

“They have a ghost train Max” you scream in excitement.

“Whats a ghost train?” You look dumbfounded.

“You are 364 years old & you have never ever been on a ghost train?” There’s a reason why he’s waited to turn you, he wants you to immortally be the same age he was when he was turned forever at almost 32 years old. That way you won’t look like an odd couple together. You have been dating him for the last 4 years, & he asked you to be his forever in your 30th birthday. This is all so right for you both, but the fact he’s never been on a ghost train does bother you a little.

“I don’t see what all the fuss is about” he says as you drag him across to it. “I mean…”

“If you say ghosts aren’t real I’m calling bullshit..” you sternly say which shuts him up a little.

“Fair enough”

“Come on Max you promised I could do whatever I wanted next baby please, can we do this?”

Max huffs “alright, alright, fine” this is a well organised event but this ghost train is not one from Disney or a fright night kind of thing. But you can see from some peoples faces that they’ve had a few jump scares as they get off the ride.

The ride attendant takes you tokens & straps you into a carriage.

“Welcome to the ghouls of gore” they state they are dressed as a werewolf. “Where mortals scream & the undead devour” Max raises an eyebrow at them.

“We will be the judge of that” Max cockily replies. You instantly lock your arms with him. You’re not scared but you want to feel as close to Max as possible while he probably sits there & goes ahhh that’s not how a zombie looks critiquing it. Also his slower heartbeat, as you feel his icy skin, is always calming. Many a night have you fallen asleep to his one beat every 5 seconds pulse. It’s just enough to keep him alive. “You okay?” He asks as you look at each other. He looks concerned which you think is for you.

“I’m with you Max, of course I am” & with that the ride starts. It flys through various rooms, Actors leap out, the ride drops, the statues are spooky & the score send chills down your spine. You’ve been on scarier ghost trains but this is pretty good for what you have paid. You let out a few genuine screams as well as some because you know you should. But Max sits next to you almost in silence. It’s only when the ride ends that you look at him. He’s even whiter than he usually is. Something not right with your own creature of the night.

“Well” says the attendant “I’m guessing that worked” they joke looking at Max. He looks pale & spooked. As soon as he is released Max bolts & storms off. Something has been triggered in him.

“Thank you” you say to the ride person & you catch up with Max who’s storming off still not saying a word, he has no idea where he’s heading either, he’s in a strop. “Max slow down what’s up”

“Nothing” he snaps. Brushing you away.

“Maximums Victor Rodrick VanPhelt” that’s his full name back from when he was mortal. You saying that always means he’s in trouble. Picking Max Phillips is a much easier name for people. “Turn & face me” Max stops in his tracks his face is like thunder. But his bottom lip is quivering. He looks scared. “What’s wrong?” It’s a few seconds of silence, your own smile dropping before he speaks.

“What if I kill you?”

“What”

“I’ve tried twice before with who I thought was the one, both ended in death & pain, both put me off finding another forever. & now here you are, so calm about the process, so ready to accept your fate.” His eyes are watering & you both walk up to each other & embrace.

“Honestly Max, I’m a bit scared”

“Really” he now looks even more worried.

“But I’d rather risk it being turned immortal by you, then die old & you have to suffer the heartbreak when I’m 95” Max can sense the future, he has told you that he sees your mortal life ending a few years before your reaching 100 but it’s clouded it’s not set in stone.

“But what if”

“No Max stop, I want to be your forever be that be for the next 18 days after tonight or 30 years or 50 or 500, I’ve decided what I want & I want you, I want to be your vampire bride.” A single tear drips down Maxs face. Love isn’t often reciprocated for him.

“You love me, you completely love me?” he’s still uncertain. You had heard of the day before the wedding jitters but this is a new level of this.

“Yes! Forever yes! How can I prove this to you anymore than I already have” you reply, you caress his face. Your touch making him sigh. He has a small look around & then looks at the attraction to his left.

“Come with me” you are dragged to a little tent for the hall of mirrors. Neither of you have the tokens for this ride. Max reaches the attendant & hypnotises them. “We have the tokens you just don’t need to see them” & with that they let you in.

“Max?”

“Trust me”

After 3 corridors & him stuttering the cctv so it glitches out, he reaches a normal mirror & stands you in front of it. You look at your over sizes hoodie & big scarf, your ripped navy jeans & your blonde hair styled as a bob. Your black nail shine & fingerless gloves touch your outfit.

“What do you see?” He asks

“Your future wife” you reply.

“True…” he says “but I want to know that you see more than this” you look deeply into the mirror. You know what he’s asking you to see.

“I see me, a strong confident woman who knows what she want. No clothes define who I am & neither will time. I see a lost soul who then met the man of her dreams. I see the person I was & the person I will become.” You then see something & blink twice & then hold Max hand”… & I see us standing beside each other for eternity” max is a little choked by this. It’s the answer he hoped for.

“That’s very sweet…” but you interrupt him.

“No max I see your reflection…” Max steps back a little. Max can always see his slight reflection. It’s always delayed a little, & it foggy but he can always see himself enough to check he looks good.

“What?! That’s impossible I…”

“No max” you look up at him beaming & then back to the mirror. “When I held your hand I saw something shimmer in the mirror. Like there was something that moved quickly, almost a ghost but the more I squeeze your hand…” you hold it tighter”I can see it more, there’s something blurry in the mirror that I can see & it’s in the place where you should be” your own lip trembles. You can see your vampire staring back at you in the glass. Maybe your mind wanted to see it, maybe it wasn’t really there but you don’t care.

“Wow” with his other hand Max wipes a small tear away. “& you’re sure you’re not already a vampire?”

You laugh”no max otherwise you’d have died drinking me”

“True, it’s just no one’s ever mentioned my reflection before” Max is struggling to keep it together. He’s overwhelmed with emotion. “You see me for all I am worth & more” Max turns to face you before his lips meet yours. Always deep & passionately. His lust never dying down. It’s easy to fall for someone when they can kiss this good. The way you wrap your arms around him, one hand on his shoulder the other ruffling his hair.

“Always Max” you say as the kiss breaks. You bite his bottom lip as it ends. That’s code for wanting him. Max always wants you, but he didn’t just want to ask you for consent each time so you biting his lip makes sure he is aware you are in the mood. He eyes dilate & he hissed slightly.

“Okay?”

“Okay”

Max then has a quick look around.

“I’m not sure where though baby” he says as he walks you out the hall of mirrors.

“We could go home Max &…”

“No you want me now, I’m not wasting this opportunity” he rolls his eyes back into his head to use one of his vampire sense to see if there somewhere you could go or hide. It’s the one thing you don’t like him doing as a vampire, because you can’t see those dark caramel eyes. It’s only ever for a few seconds, but that’s always when you remember he’s not human. Even when he drinks from you, that feels more normal with that. “Ahhh” he snaps back into the now his eyes beaming back at you & the vacant empty face filled with a mischievous smile.

“You found somewhere”

“Yes” he grabs you by the hand, leaving the hall of mirrors & you start marching across the fair to the security hut & walk behind it. There’s a small table & a broken chair but it’s out the way & no one can see you.”we don’t need long baby I know what I want to do to you.” He’s kissing up your neck once you’re behind the hut. You’re already moaning as he licks at you & his hand undoes your belt on you jeans.

“Max what if…” but he raises an eyebrow

“Don’t worry I’ve cast some hypnosis on a few people as we got here to say stay away. Anyone who wants to interrupt, we can note for future feeds” his hand pull your jeans & knickers down to your knees as he pushes you hard against the hut wall.

“& the security?”

“Shhh baby you overthink too much” your hands are undoing his own trouser. It’s as you feel his briefs that two fingers slip inside you.

“Oooh Max” your eyes scrunch shut as the rhythm is fast, squelching noises coming from your sex within seconds. He has large hands & long fingers & with a vampiric speed he possesses he can have you cumming on his fingers in about 90seconds. The way his thumb pleasures your clit as well. It’s over stimulation for sure in the few minutes he works with his hand but oh does it feel good when he does this. “Max, fuck max” your neck is strained. His small kisses peppering each inch of it. You can feel him getting hand in his own underwear. & then he hits the spot & you scream.

“That’s it sweetheart, cum, cum for your vampire Prince.” Flecks of red fill his eyes. He’s lusting for more than just sex. That sets you off, drenching his finger, as you clamp & he pulls you into him to keep you on your feet. “Damn baby, you know how to make my heart beat almost normally”

“Max mmmmmm max” you just about get the word out. You eventually lean against the hut & remove the scarf while he frees his always impressive length from his briefs. Throbbing & leaking. “Max I want to give you the ultimate pleasure” you whisper into is ear as he swipes his penis over your entrance, a few stroke of it on your clit just to keep you at this level. He loves a tease.

“I thought you said that was for special occasions only” your hands leave Max & you remove your hoddie. Your neck & shoulder line almost looking as broad as him, because you always want to give him an opportunity to enjoy what he wants most.

“I did, tonight is that”

“What about our wedding night tomorrow?” He raises an eyebrow as he licks his lips, nudging further his tip almost ready to slip inside you.

“Max I plan on having a wedding week… oooh fuck”it’s time for your eyes to roll into the back of your head, your mouth wide open gasping for air, as in two ferocious thrusts, hes deep inside your cunt. Where his fingers have been long & got to that spot, he’s hit it already as you flutter around him instantly.

“Well as long as you say the magic words we agreed on I shall. God you’re super tight tonight” you wrap a leg around Max a better angle, as much as Max always pleasures you & has you gushing all over his cock, this just makes it even better.

“Be my Bitey Maxie, drink, please” the words splutter out of your mouth.

When you met Max & he revealed he was a vampire you swore no drinking of you during sex. Before it yes & much time afterwards of course but never during it. 6months in you let him sink his fangs into your thighs, the mixture of bloody & you collective juices made him ravenous. Over the next 3 years you have allowed him to have a small drink while he’s been buried inside you. Your blood tastes better & sweet at your climax he says & 3 months ago when you agreed your transformation date you allowed him to drink from your neck as he fucked you. The orgasm you had, had you walking awkwardly for a few days afterwards. It shook you to the core & you couldn’t stop thinking about the high & how close to possible death you could be. His fangs do heal but to drink from your neck while spilling inside you is his ultimate turn on but this is also something that you have agreed to do a few more times since. You enjoyed the rush a little too much.

“Mark me Max” you pant”I consent” your hips already move in time with his, a body so familiar, you can feel every inch of him, be it his hand on your arse or each pulse inside you, with his throbbing cock.

“Yes my bride” the brown from his eyes is all but gone. So black & wide with a red outline, he’s ready to feast. It always amazes you that his fangs slowly appear. You are curious as to why they aren’t always as prominent as when he’s about to feed. They mesmerise you every time. His hand as he plunders you rhythmically, grips around your chin to hold you in place, exaggerating your neck, he wants to pick the right vein. He loves kissing your neck & the little crook, Max does love kissing everywhere if he’s honest, but the pulse & flow if the blood there always makes him ravenous for more.

“I’m ready baby” you gasp.

“You think you are” there’s the devils smirk, his fangs white sparkling & dripping. He grazes them down your neck before he sinks them into his preferred feeding spot. He hit the soft spot inside you at that exact moment too. Your body already wanting to crumble at the intense pleasure.

“Fuck Max” a drawn out whimper escapes your mouth, pleasure filling your body. You can feel a small trickle down your shoulder as the fangs sink deeper into your flesh. The way his body pushes into you more so your flat against the wall. You’re grinding on his cock creating the frictions most of the time now. It’s easier todo when you sit or lie down, let alone be out in the open having sex. Your eyes when they do open from desire look up at the stars in the night sky.

Max is lapping at each drop, you’re the sweetest tonight he’s ever tasted you & that’s including when he once put sugar in everything you at to see how it effected the taste of your blood. Maybe it’s your connection & passion that makes you taste delicious. He feels guilty for drinking, at about his third slurp but you moan his name again & he remembers you consented to this & to everything that will follow. Your blood is also tasting warmer as you breathe heavier, it’s pumping through your veins. This is why this is a danger, one nip too many will see you off. But Max has recently agreed that if that were to happen that he would turn your straight away.

There you both stand wrapped around each other, experiencing pleasures that neither of you knew existed. The idea of someone catch you exhilarates you both, makes this session even harder & sexier. But Max powers would over throw & convince anyone that this was not what they saw. Two entangled bodies becoming one. As you moan you feel Max start to increase his pace again.

“Fuck, fuck oh god Max” every sense is tingling. Your body feels sexy & the way he is thrusting has you stuttering. He’s enjoying the way you taste, the way you feel, the way you are so desperate to satisfy him, sexually & as a feed. No one has every brought him to nirvana before, but right now as he can feel his own heart beat almost like it used to 300 odd years ago, he moans. His teeth sink deeper & you both gasp.

“Max…mmmm… Max… MAX!” You scream & let go of your desire. You clamp & soak him. It makes him pulse more & his teeth go even deeper & your body starts to convulse from overstimulation of everything. Your grip becomes less on him & he can sense this might be too much, but it’s also really turning him on. He’s so close. He wants to cum. One last sink of those teeth have you both hissing & he removes his fangs completely with the next thrust.

“Fuck” he growls spilling inside you, coating your walls. Making you go numb. An incredible high for him. But Max has mucked up. He’s not heeled your neck & your blood is still pumping faster than ever. It only takes him a few seconds to regain his sense but he then suddenly notices the white look on your face, slowly draining of colour & not just from the intense orgasm you’ve just had. Crimson is leaking from your neck.”oh fuck” in his fangs go again, to stem the flow. Their venom as he slowly withdraws them starts to heal you but he’s worried he’s done it too late. They drip into your blood stream & he raises an eye to check your still with him. He doesn’t want to turn you, not right now, but he knows if he had to he would. The last few drops of his venom drop onto your skin, sealing shut the holes, so it looks like all you have there are two spots. His breath is short, he’s panicked. Did he stop the flow in time? He looks deeply at you in hope that you will open your eyes & speak to him.

“Max” it’s a whimper as you lick your lips & come to from the most phenomenal sensation ever. Max sighs in relief.

“You okay baby?”

“Mmmmhmmmm yeaa I am, I’ve never felt so alive” your eyes connect & the frenzied kiss you receive makes you both tremble. He’s just happy he didn’t go too far in his excitement. He’s still inside you but softening.

“For a second I thought I’d lost you, & would have to delay our wedding due to turning you” he pants, his eyes are filled with love. No longer black or with a red shimmer but still large & brown.

“I’m glad you didn’t baby, that really was extraordinary” you can feel your body warm up again clearly he had drunk more than he should have, you cheeks start to colour. He holds you still so you don’t collapse as he pulls out of you & then rummages in your bag for a cloth. Usually that’s just used for blood spillage when he’s had a sudden urge to drink, but today it’s for other bodily fluids. He’s delicate as he cleans you. Despite you saying your okay he knows what he just did was a bit too much. As you both but your bottoms back on you can see in his eyes there still a concern.

“What’s the matter Max?” He does his belt up & sighs, before reply.

“You really were willing to let me drain you tonight to get your high werent you?”

“Yes Maxie, why do you think I consented”

“Wow” he says in admiration. He’s proud that you’d do anything for him. “& I didn’t even need to hypnotise you to do it”

“I have a confession Max, your hypnosis has never worked one me.” You giggle. You can feel when he tries to do it to you, especially at the start of your relationship. He’s not attempted it in ages. But nine times out of ten when he was suggesting you were down for anyhow.

“Why didn’t you tell me that?”

“Why is that an issue?”

“No!” He rubs the back of his head & pulls you in closes. “Vampire lore states that your true vampire bride wants what you do & doesn’t need persuasion” you beam back before you fling your arms around him.

“Oooh Max” it’s a soft kiss you plant on his lips before he then makes it deeper.”I love you baby”

“I love you more”

“Impossible”

“Try me” you both giggle before you kiss once more.

By the time you make your way back to the attractions most of the family’s have left. It’s now all adults & older teens hanging about. You then see an apple bobbing contest. It has a leader board with how many apples can be plucked in 2mins. The top score is 8. You see the look in Max eyes.

“Well” he says. You know his fangs & reflexes will help.

“Go on then Max”

“Ooh no your joining in too”

“What? No Max this is an easy win for you” I wink at him.

“See i think it’s going to be easier for you”

“Why?”

“Well let’s just say your bobbing & gag reflex are second to none” he says with a cheeky smile.

“Max!”

“What?! Just stating the truth baby”

“Hmmmm” you smirk & pay for both you entry’s. You then whisper to Max as you both get ready for the contest. “Do you think blow jobs will be better when I have fangs?��� Max does a double take & then smiles.

“I have no idea sweetie” he takes off his coat & gets ready for his go.”but I can’t wait to find out” & so Max plunges his head into the ice water bucket. A score of 13 he gets, claiming first prize. Not that this discouraged you afterwards. Your own mouth meant you came in 2nd with a total of 10.

“That’s my good girl” Max says after your attempt, As he kisses you deeply. “My forever.”

#fanfic #pedro pascal #my fics #smutt #no minors #over18 #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal cinematic universe #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal fan fic #pedro pascal fandom #pedro pascal fanfiction #max philips fan fiction #max philips x reader #max phillips #max phillips fanfiction

[lixiepeach]

Forever

Summary: As your relationship with Eddie changes, so do the relationships with others around you. As you navigate this new challenge, Eddie stands by your side, no matter what.

Pairing: Eddie Munson x reader

Warnings: Eddie lives, shitty parents, pregnancy, struggles of teen pregnancies, lots of language and arguments and emotions, Eddie being an A+ boyfriend, brief mention of past assault.

A/N: Well...it's been a minute. I apologize. I just wasn't sure where I was going with this part and then I lost interest for a bit. I finally sat down and just wrote an ending. It's utter garbage, but it's an ending.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Masterlist

You haven’t moved. Slow tears still sliding down your cheeks as the sky lightens. The door opens, and for half a moment you’re looking hopefully for Eddie, but it’s not. It must have been later than you thought. The past few hours had gone by in a haze of tears and hope that Eddie would come back, take you into his arms and tell you everything is going to be okay. 

You stand from the couch, hastily wiping your tears from your cheeks then wiping your wet hands on your skirt. “Mr. Munson.” You greet Eddie’s uncle. You hadn’t even met him yet, Eddie wanting to save that until you were ready to reveal your relationship. “I’m-” 

“The girl Eddie hasn’t stopped talking about.” He says, looking you over. His gaze isn’t unkind, even though he had just walked into his trailer to find a stranger alone on his couch. 

“O-Oh.” You’re surprised. Eddie had been talking about you? “I’m sorry, I was hoping Eddie would be back by now. I must have lost track of time. I should go.” 

“Sit.” 

You drop back onto the couch before you can even make for the door. Mr. Munson sits in the chair next to the couch with a grunt, stretching his legs out. He pulls out a cigarette, lighting it. 

“Eddie’s been going on nonstop about you for the last couple months, ever since he beat up that boy for you.” 

You swallow the lump in your throat. “I-I didn’t think it would-” 

He cuts you off again. “I’m not upset about him getting in trouble. I would have done the same thing. I’d still do the same thing now.” He takes a long drag from his cigarette. “You wanna tell me why you’re sitting here alone?” 

Of course, the last time he’d come home to find a girl alone in the trailer she was dead and Eddie was wanted for murder. You really hadn’t thought this one through. 

“I came over to talk to Eddie earlier.” You say, ready to tell him the truth. Ready to spill it all finally. “We’ve been seeing each other since before that incident. We didn’t want to tell anyone right away, since everything that happened, we thought it might be a bit too much too soon.” You wrap your arms around yourself, your gaze on the carpet in front of you. “I found out yesterday...I’m pregnant.” 

He’s quiet for a while. You had thought perhaps you would be telling Eddie’s uncle with him there, with support. Now you’re on your own. You supposed you’d be doing the same with your parents. Having to break the news that the perfect life they’d planned for you was now in the garbage. 

“It’s his?” He finally asks. 

“I don’t know.” You say honestly. “Shortly before I broke up with Matt, he...he assaulted me. Until I can go to the doctor and find out how far along I am, I don’t know for sure. Eddie deserved to know, even if it’s not his.” 

Mr. Munson leans forward, resting his elbows on his knees. “I know Eddie. He’s a good kid. Misunderstood, but he’s a good guy. He cares about you. A lot. I knew just from listening to him you weren’t just some girl. I’ve had my suspicions for a while that there was something going on. Just give him time. This is life changing news.” You stand as Mr. Munson does. “I’ll talk to him when he does come back.” 

You nod, smiling just a bit. “Thank you, Mr. Munson.” 

“Call me Wayne.” He says, holding out his hand. 

You tell him your name, shaking his hand. 

You feel a bit better driving back. Though Eddie’s reaction had been a bit different from what you planned, it hadn’t been as brutal as you expected. Still, there was a chance he could come back and decide he didn’t want to be tied down by a baby and he’d rather leave you behind. You didn’t know what you’d do then. You knew your parents wouldn’t react as calmly as Eddie’s uncle. They may even go so far as to kick you out. Of course, you could always play the sympathy card and claim it’s Matt’s and tell them the truth of what happened. 

Your palms are sweating by the time you pull into the driveway. Your parents are undoubtedly already awake, probably going about their morning routine. You could slip in your window, pretend you hadn’t left at all. Something in you just can’t bear to keep hiding, perhaps the exhaustion from a sleepless night weighing on you as you get out of the car, walking in the front door. 

You drop the keys in the bowl, making your way towards the stairs. You had to pass the kitchen, where your parents were. 

“Honey? Is that you?” Your mother peeks her head around the corner, a frown pinching her perfectly shaped brows together. “Where were you so early this morning?” 

“I went to see someone.” You say. “I needed to talk to them.” 

Your mother steps closer, running her hands over your wrinkled t-shirt. “You smell like cigarettes. Have you started smoking?” She grabs your hands, turning them over as if they’d tell her the truth. 

“Mom!” You yank your hands away, tears brimming in your eyes. “I just want to go upstairs and take a long hot bath and maybe cry a while.” 

Her wide eyed expression smooths itself into a worried line as she nods slowly. “Okay.” 

You make your way up the stairs, not wanting to hesitate and risk an interrogation. You do as you said you were going to, sinking into a steaming bath, letting the tears flow freely once again. 

***

You spend all day in bed. You don’t bother changing out of your robe, crawling under your too soft sheets and letting yourself sink into the plush mattress. You had spent most of the day between sleep and thinking about how long you could hide the pregnancy until your parents noticed. You could start eating more, put on the guise that you’re gaining weight. That would work for a while. But there would come a time when it was obvious that was not just fat. Then, of course, the baby would have to come eventually. There would be no hiding it then. 

It’s almost evening when you hear the knock on your window. You had thought you were dreaming at first, as you had been in the strange place between sleep and wakefulness. You hear it again, rousing yourself. You turn to look at your window, Eddie crouched in his usual spot, waiting for you to open it. You hurry over, sliding it open. 

“Eddie, what are you doing? You know we have neighbors!” 

“I know.” He crawls into your room rather ungracefully, winding up on the floor. “I waited until your mom’s car left.” 

“Yeah, she’s going to get dinner before dad gets home, which will be very soon.” 

“I need to talk to you.” He says, pulling himself up to stand. 

“Okay.” You sit yourself on the edge of the bed, staring up at him. “Then talk.” 

He swallows thickly, looking nervous. He obviously thought you were upset with him, which wouldn’t be wrong. “I talked to my uncle.” 

You nod. “So did I.” 

He nods. “I know. I’m sorry for running. It’s...it’s what I do when I’m scared. I ran when the whole thing with Crissy...then I didn’t run and almost died.” He swallows thickly. “This...this shouldn’t be that surprising, considering we haven’t exactly been careful.” He steps up in front of you, taking your hands. You let him, tilting your head back to stare at him. “I do love you. I love you a lot.” He squats down so you’re eye to eye. “I’m not gonna run again. That baby’s mine. Even if it’s not, I’m not going anywhere. I’ll get a day job, find us a place on our own. I can’t realistically offer you this.” He motions around you at your spacious room. “But I will try my best to make sure you never want for anything.” 

You hastily try to blink away the tears gathering in your eyes. “Oh, Eddie.” You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him into a hug. “I thought you would hate me. I thought you would tell me to get out and never speak to me again.” 

“Never.” He says, holding you tightly. “This is technically my fault, so the least I can do is take care of you.” 

“You might have to.” You murmur, still holding onto him. “My parents will not take this well.” 

Eddie pulls back a bit, arms still wrapped around you. “My uncle said we can stay at the trailer if we need to, until we can find a place.” 

You nod. “I’ll start looking for a job too. At least something until the baby comes. I-I need to make a doctor’s appointment too.” You sniffle, your stomach churning nervously. “I don’t know how to do that. Oh god, I don’t know how to do anything. I can’t even take care of myself, how am I supposed to be a parent?” 

“Hey.” Eddie takes your face in his hands, forcing you to look at him. “One step at a time, alright? We’ll make a doctor’s appointment, then we should tell our friends, then we’ll worry about your parents.” 

You nod, lifting your hands to cover his. “Okay.” 

He leans in to kiss you softly, wrapping his arms around your waist. “I love you.” He murmurs against your lips. 

“Love you too.” You hum, tanging a hand in his hair. 

You hear a car door shut outside, pulling away. “Someone’s home.” 

Eddie leans in, kissing you one more time. “I’ll see you tomorrow?” 

You nod. “My parents will be gone most of the day.” 

He nods, stealing one more kiss before moving to your window. You follow, watching him climb down the house before sneaking across the yard to where his van is parked down the street. 

Soon. You think. Soon we won’t have to sneak around. 

***

Telling your friends goes better than you had expected. Of course, Steve and Robin already knew. Max had her suspicions, and apparently Dustin and Mike had a wager on whether or not you were together. The only two who seemed surprised were Lucas and Nancy, but apparently you hadn’t been quite as inconspicuous as you had thought. 

The news of your pregnancy is what took them all by surprise. You and Eddie had agreed to keep what happened between you and Matt secret, and you knew Steve and Robin wouldn’t say anything either. Eddie had proudly proclaimed that the baby was his, even though you really had no idea. According to the doctor you were about seven weeks along, meaning either Eddie or Matt could be the father. There was no way to tell yet. Not until the baby was born. 

Eddie was completely committed to being the father, no matter what. 

You only hope that dedication holds when you tell your parents. 

***

The silence is deafening in your house as you sit across from your parents. Your mother is gripping her china tea cup so tightly you’re worried she might shatter it. She looks like she may either pass out or vomit, pale still from the shock when you’d walked in with Eddie and introduced him as your boyfriend. 

Eddie had asked if he should rent a suit to meet them, but you had told him to be himself, not wanting him to have to change to fit into your world. If they wouldn’t accept him, you didn’t want to be part of their world anymore. 

“How...How long have you two been...together?” Your mother asks, her voice strained. 

“Around the time Matt and I broke up.” You say, squeezing Eddie’s hand where it’s holding yours. 

Your mother lets out a shaky breath, lifting her tea cup to her lips once more. Your father’s barely moved, sitting rigidly on the couch next to her. If he hadn’t been blinking you might have thought he had been turned to stone. 

“We wanted to wait and let everything that happened with Matt cool over before we told everyone.” You continue, Eddie’s thumb tracing circles on the back of your hand, a quiet reminder that he’s there. “We met before that, though. Steve’s friends Dustin, Lucas and Mike were part of his club during school. We met through them.” 

“What kind of club?” Your father finally speaks. 

“Dungeons and Dragons.” Eddie answers. 

Your mother makes a choked noise, setting her cup down on the coffee table. “Okay. This has gone too far.” She looks up at you. “Sweetie I know you’ve been upset after what happened with Matt, but this isn’t time for a teenage rebellion. You have your future to think about. We,” she motions between herself and your father. “We admit we made a mistake in choosing Matt. Perhaps he wasn’t the best fit for you, but this...” She motions to Eddie. “This is going too far.”  

“You don’t know shit about what happened with Matt.” You find yourself saying, your mother flinching at the use of an expletive. “Eddie has treated me better than any of those boys that you chose. Except Steve. But I never liked Steve like that! He never liked me either! You were the ones who forced us together! You were the ones forcing me into relationships when all I wanted to do was finish school!” 

“We just wanted to prepare you for your best future.” Your mother says. 

“No, you wanted to prepare me for your future. You’ve controlled every inch of my life since I was little and you never once thought maybe what you want isn’t what I want.” You’re gripping Eddie’s hand tighter, anger bubbling up inside. 

“What, you want this?” Your father says, motioning to Eddie. “You want to live in a trailer with some deadbeat metalhead who will move on with the next whore that throws herself at him? You want two kids by the time you’re twenty, living off welfare pretending you’re happy?” 

You can’t hold it in anymore, rising to your feet. “How dare you! So what, Eddie isn’t rich, he makes me happy. That’s more than you two have ever given me. We came here today to tell you that I’m pregnant. Yeah, I’m pregnant at 18 with a metalhead’s baby! We wanted to tell you in case you were decent enough to want to be a part of your grandchild’s life, but you know what? I don’t want you to be part of their life.” You grab Eddie’s hand, pulling him towards the door. “You don’t have to worry about us ruining your perfect lives because you’ll never see us again.” 

You pull Eddie out the door, slamming it behind you. 

You’re still shaking as you sit in the passenger seat of Eddie’s van. Your vision is blurry, tears threatening to fall. You had told yourself you wouldn’t cry. Your parents weren’t worth shedding tears over, but you can’t help it. 

“Fuck.” You breathe, pressing your palms into your eyes to try and force the tears back in. “I knew it. I knew that’s how they would react. Why the fuck am I so upset?” 

“Because they just solidified the fact that they’re assholes.” Eddie says, taking your hand in his. 

You choke on a sob, covering your mouth. Eddie holds your hand as he drives back towards the trailer, to your new home. You knew your parents wouldn’t react well. You knew they’d throw insults and get angry that you weren’t following their perfect plan to a T. It still hurts. 

“Hey.” Eddie squeezes your hand as he shuts off the van. “Come on.” 

He climbs back into the back of the van, shoving around the wrappers and other stuff he’d haphazardly tossed in over the weeks since he’d cleaned it last. You follow him, sitting next to him when he makes a little nest with the blanket he kept in the back. 

He wraps his arms around you, holding you tight.

“Eddie?” You murmur against his chest. 

“Hmm?” He hums, cheek resting against the top of your head. 

“You’re not gonna leave me, are you?” 

He pulls away just a little, cupping your face. “Never. I meant it. You’re stuck with me for the long haul, babe.” 

You smile, leaning your head against his chest. “We’re really on our own, aren’t we?” 

“We’ll figure it out.” He says, rubbing your arm. “I’m not gonna let you starve. Uncle Wayne won’t either.” 

“I don’t want to put this on him.” You say, sitting up. 

“We’re not.” He says, sitting up straighter. “He’s actually kind of excited. He likes you, you know. He thinks you’re a good influence on me.” 

“Am I?” You grin. 

“Well, I did graduate thanks to our study sessions.” 

“Is that so?” You laugh. “Cause I don’t remember there being a whole lot of studying during those sessions.” 

“This situation is also forcing me to go out and get a real job.” 

You take his hand, tracing your fingers over the back of it. “Eddie, I don’t want you to give up your band because of me. I know it’s something you love and I don’t want to take that away from you. Just promise when you get super famous, you won’t leave me and the baby behind.” 

Eddie cups the back of your head, leaning in close. “Never.” He presses a soft kiss to your lips. 

“Eddie?” You frown, feeling over his fingers. “You’re missing one.” There was an obvious gap where one of his rings usually sat. 

“Oh shit.” Eddie digs in the pocket of his jacket. “I was gonna give this to you.” 

He pulls out a chain, one of his rings strung on it. He undoes the clasp, placing it around your neck. 

“Eddie,” You run your fingers over it. 

“Just as a reminder.” He says. “Until I can get you a real one.” 

You tear up again, sniffling. “Oh god. I don’t wanna cry again.” 

“Come here.” He wraps his arms around you, pulling you back against his chest. 

“It’s the hormones, I swear.” 

He laughs, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. You sit in silence for a few minutes, just enjoying being close to Eddie. 

“We have to come up with names!” Eddie says out of the blue. 

“We are not naming our child Ozzy.” You murmur. “Or Eddie Jr.” 

***

Two weeks have gone by since you revealed your relationship and pregnancy to your parents. You hadn’t heard anything from them, and you weren’t expecting to. You had officially assimilated yourself into Eddie’s life, and into the trailer. You and Eddie tried to be out during the day so Wayne could sleep, which wasn’t hard. You had been busy going to the library to work on resumes, and then actually looking for work. 

You were starting to show a little bit, a small bump forming, though it was easily hidden by baggy clothing still. The seven months you still have feels like it’s not enough time, but you know it can't come soon enough. 

“Your parents came by.” Wayne tells you as you and Eddie return from a long day of job hunting. 

You stop in your tracks, blinking in surprise. “My parents?” You ask in disbelief. “My parents came here?” 

He nods. “Yeah, wanted to have a chat. Make sure you were alright, hadn’t been dumped on the side of the road yet.” 

You sigh, leaning against the kitchen counter. “Yeah, sounds like them.” 

“They seem to have changed their tune a bit. Invited us all to dinner this weekend, if you want to go.” 

Eddie leans up against the counter next to you. “We don’t have to, if you don’t want to.” 

You sigh, chewing on your lip. You really wanted to keep your promise of them never seeing you again. They had proved they weren’t worth the stress of having in your life, and obviously didn’t approve of your relationship. But, if they had willingly come here to check on you, maybe something had changed. 

“I think we should go.” You say finally. “I think they at least deserve a chance to say what they want to say. I can’t say I want them back in my life.” You wrap your arms around Eddie. “If they try insulting you again, though, we’re leaving.” 

***

The silence is loud as you sit at the dinner table. The occasional clank of silverware is the only thing that breaks the silence, the tension palpable. You remembered many dinners sitting at this table, silent and tense after your father spent a day in court. You had been afraid to breathe too loudly during those meals. Even now you are afraid to make too much noise, to draw attention to yourself. 

It’s hard to gauge your parents' mindsets, even in the silence. Your mother had greeted you rather stiffly with a hug, eyes immediately drawn to the small bump of your stomach, very visible in the dress you had chosen to wear. You wanted them to see, wanted them to know you had been telling the truth. 

Your father is first to break the silence, clearing his throat after taking a drink of water. He says your name in his lawyer tone, and you subconsciously brace yourself for what’s coming next. “Your mother and I wanted to apologize. We may have jumped to conclusions rather quickly, and we wanted to apologize for the things we said the last time we spoke.” 

“Thank you for your apology.” You say, not sure whether you wanted to forgive them yet, or not. 

“We also wanted to remind you of your trust fund.” Your father continues. “Since you are 18, those funds are available to you now, should you find yourself in need.” 

“Trust fund?” You frown, this being the first time you’ve heard about it. 

“We set it up for you not long after you were born.” Your mother says. “We wanted you to have something in case something happened to us, or for the future.” 

It’s quiet for a moment as you look between the two of them. Neither of them look happy, but you are glad they’re at least being civil. “Thank you.” You say, not sure what else to say. 

“It’s all yours.” Your father says. “All you need is to go to the bank. There’s more than enough to support you and your...” He eyes Eddie for a second. “Growing family, if you should need it.” 

***

Eddie, Wayne, and your father head into the living room as you and your mother clean up after dinner. It had gone surprisingly well, far better than you had expected it to. Your mother washes the dishes and you dry them, setting them back in the cupboards where they belong. 

“You look happy.” Your mother says, passing you another plate. 

You look at her, the small smile still on your face. “I am happy.” 

She hums quietly. “I always wished you would wind up in a life that made you happy.” She turns off the water, looking at you. “That you could have a life I only dreamed of.” 

You frown a bit, setting down the dish you had been drying. “What do you mean?” 

“Your father wasn’t my first love.” Your mother starts. “It was a boy in my choir class. He had the voice of an angel. Could move you to tears just opening his mouth. I got it in my head he was the boy I was going to marry. My parents didn’t like that idea, though. They wanted me to marry someone who was going to be successful. Marrying a musician wasn’t a guarantee, so they crushed those dreams of mine, sent me to a private college where I met your father who was already interning with a law firm.” 

“What happened to the choir boy?” You ask. 

“Oh, he went off to some state school to study music and become a famous singer. I don’t know what happened to him after that. Don’t get me wrong, I love your father, but sometimes I can’t help but think about what my life would be like if I hadn’t listened to my parents.” She takes your hands, squeezing them gently. “We tried to instill a belief in you from a young age that to be happy you had to be successful. We tried best to prepare you for a life like ours, instead of letting you make your own decisions. I can tell that boy really loves you. I can see it when he looks at you. Even though he’s not quite what we had pictured, as long as you’re happy and healthy.” 

“I am happy.” You say. “For the first time I feel like I’m doing something right.” 

Your mother pulls you into a hug and you let her. It was a rare, genuine hug from her, one you usually only received when you were sick or when you would go off to summer camp for a week. 

 You wish they weren’t so rare. You wish a lot of things were different. You can’t change them, though. You can’t change anything that’s happened. You’re just glad things seem to be changing for the better. 

***

You and Eddie move into an apartment a few weeks later. It’s small, nothing special, but it’s enough for now. You had dipped into the trust fund for the deposit, but Eddie found a job at the grocery store, enough to cover most of your bills. You managed to get a job at the library of all places, something you can do at least until the baby comes. 

The morning sickness and other less exciting symptoms begin to pass as the weeks go on, your little bump growing more and more. You stop hiding it, letting people talk. Your parents get bombarded with calls and visitors, but they stand firm in their support of you and Eddie. 

Despite your life turning into something far different than what you had expected, you are happy. You have a supportive family and supportive friends, and Eddie loves you. You know he does. He loves you, and he loves the baby. He had already bought and put together a crib, bought parenting books, and he took as many extra shifts he could to prepare for time off when the baby came. 

He also told you. A lot. 

In the mornings when you held each other, when you had rare time at night together, when you saw each other in passing. On rare days off you had to spend together, he was constantly telling you, reminding you. You know he means it. You can tell just when he looks at you. Sometimes you wake up to him talking to your stomach, cheek pressed against the small bump. 

You do have your fair share of disagreements, but you always find yourselves apologizing and figuring things out. 

You’re happy. For the first time in a long time, you’re genuinely happy. 

Taglist:

@amatchinwater

#stranger things #stranger things fic #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader

[maaxverstappen]

I’ve been asking ppl cus im nosy. What’s your writing process like if any? Do u have a preferred place or time. Preferred device. Do u write rough drafts then edit or is it much more considered. How do u decide that an idea is worth fleshing out or pursuing if it looks like it’s plotty. Pls yap at length if u so wish — wiz

i love this question!! and would love to know other answers so if you want to reblog them i shall be on the lookout 👀.

i answered partly here so will just like build on that!!

the process is that i’ll have an idea and depending on how large it is write out some sort of outline. my preference for all planning in life is on paper so i have a little journal that ill write out some ideas in. kind of brainstorm / mind map style of just jotting down random ideas that come to mind.

however, with longer fics like my current post-as-i-go wip i have to do it digital bc so much changes and it’s too long (see pics in previous ask). that one i actually started planning in my notes app on a plane bc the idea had to come out of me someway and i was really excited about it. i then transferred it to a google doc and added onto my chapter per chapter outline (1st pic in previous ask). i felt like that was a bit overwhelming for understanding the overall plot so then i went and made a simple overview of the key plot points per chapter (the 2nd pic in previous ask) just so i felt like i had a better understanding of the goal per chapter.

now when i sit down to write a chapter ill get both the detailed notes and the main plot points and just write whatever i feel like in order to get to the goal of the chapter.

for shorter one shot fics i’ll either have no full outline or a one page idea list kind of thing. for instance, for worth the trouble i knew that it would start and end in the present time and then everything in between would be a flashback, but i didn’t know the flashbacks would be non chronological until i was writing it. same for the chewing gum aspect that ends up being quite an important part of the symbolism and that almost weaves the parts together, that wasn’t a *thing* until i was almost finished with the rough draft and i then went to add it in to previous scenes.

for my long fic i have to be a bit more calculated with the hidden messages/foreshadowing as i can’t go back and edit published chapters lmao so that is a little more thought out + i keep track of loose ends to tie together at some point.

editing is a bit of a harder one. for my long fic my overal editing is per chapter, but i do tend to go back and edit per section too. like right now I’m writing a texting scene and first i wrote the plain texting dialogue, then i went back to add the bits in between from characters’ pov. then i’ll read over it fully and edit where needed. finally when the whole chapter is done ill read over it and edit again, but at that point it’s mainly grammar and punctuation.

my main writing issues i’ve noticed so far is that i tend to switch tenses without realising so that’s something i look out for when editing. i also am always worried they don’t *do* enough so i like to think “hmm what action can i add in here to make them more human” when editing.

so far only worth the trouble has been beta read, the rest i do myself. if I’m stuck i will talk through a lot of it with my partner who will give me some ideas and just like help lmao (she’s also the one that beta read wtt!). but she’s not in the f1 fandom so it’s a little hard to have her beta read for characterisation and specific plot points so i do that myself. like when she beta read wtt she gave a few points of feedback that weren’t too relevant bc the average f1 fic reader would understand (like the significance of spa21, there is no need to explain it).

I’m a baby fic writer so a lot of my process will be redefined and refined as i go I’m sure.

as for deciding what to write, it’s really whatever captures my attention. the prompt for help me hold onto you is one i really liked and a trope i love reading myself. i was also ready to challenge myself to a longer plot fic and i was really excited about the idea so i just went for it! my main consideration is really just how excited i am for it.

i will say that i am currently really struggling with perfectionism / imposter syndrome. I’m having a hard time getting the words onto paper bc it feels like it’ll never be as good as my favourite authors anyway so what’s the point. (which is now also impacting the way i read fics bc it makes me sad that ill never write anything as good as what I’m reading lol)

i generally write on my laptop! in a google doc with grammarly activated and the word count on screen (which pisses me off bc i have to turn it back on after every refresh). i wrote my latest crafty!oscar on my phone (bc i was too excited to wait till i got to my laptop) but wouldn’t ever do that for anything much longer or plot-ier than that.

i fear this has gotten very long. i know u said yap away but …. i perhaps have yapped too close to the sun.

#really liked answering this :-) and the fic writer asks from the weekend too. so fun #she says as she still has unanswered asks from that game in her inbox #anyway #thanks wiz <3 a community gem as always #m answers #about me

[hyenahunt]

Saga: Epilogue - 4 [END]

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Characters: Seiya, Hokuto

Proofreading: moricchiichan (JP) & Peace (ENG)

Translation: kotofucius

Hokuto: I’ll become happy, Father. With the people I love — as just a single ordinary human.

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Location: Reverse Live Stage

Seiya: Hocchan.

It seems you're finally done processing your calculations.

Hokuto: …….

Seiya: I know what you’re thinking; I’m your father, after all. That’s why… I have a piece of advice for you: Don’t stop calculating there.

Hokuto: …?

Seiya: As you have guessed… Well, I've taken victory this time. But the world hasn’t ended, nor have we died.

Life goes on. And you must continue to think ahead for as long as you live, just as I do.

Because I am a boring adult, you see. I can’t afford to be burnt out just for a momentary flicker of youth.

You can’t allow yourself to get fixated only on the outcome of the fight in front of you and cease thinking, either.

Hokuto: …What do you mean by that?

Tell me, Father. As much as it pains me to admit it, I don’t measure up to you yet. I can’t calculate like you do, so the only choice I have is to ask for your guidance.

Seiya: Of course. No, perhaps… Asking for guidance and giving an answer in response, or bestowing advice is the natural interaction between parent and child.

So you have absolutely no reason to feel unworthy of it.

If anything, I’m relieved. It appears I’ve managed to save face as a father…

One day, you’ll overcome me completely, that much is sure; but it would’ve been very pathetic nonetheless to have my son knock me out at the first punch.

That aside — as you can see, Rain-bows is coming out on top for this third song.

This match will end with two wins and one loss for you, making you the victor. As it was a close match, our total points will take a plunge.

Then what does that make the result? We will still be above you in the total of points, so you won’t be able to turn the tables on us.

Reverse Live will be won by Lilith.

You’ll be the close second, with there being barely any gap between our total points.

Anyone will judge it as a close battle on the whole.

Hokuto: …You’re planning to share the spotlight with Rain-bows by making us the victor in the direct confrontation, is it? You’re taking pity on us — that’s so aggravating.

Seiya: Fufu. It isn’t due to pity, though. We put our all into this match.

Your winning this match is entirely due to your competence.

Just the fact that you had a close battle with Hidaka Seiya will be enough to make your value skyrocket. It’ll be beneficial for your future activities as idols.

Account for everything, even for your distant future. If you can build up a track record and amass more evaluations of this kind, you will reach me someday.

However, this Reverse Live was arranged partly to recover CosPro from its reputation crisis. It’s unpardonable for us to lose in the end.

So you’ll have to excuse us, but we’re taking the trophy.

But you remember what I said, don't you? I don’t wish for one party to keep winning by a huge margin.

Everyone holding hands and crossing the finish line together may be a pipe dream… Yet a society with too extreme disparities only brings about riots and despotism.

If it comes to that, we may end up reversing the progress of time to those days of absolute monarchy.

The future of the idol industry should be one of friendly rivalry, where you elevate one another to greater heights — a wonderful, brand new world such as that.

It seems to be one they’re working toward, anyway; in CosPro, Ibara-kun, and in Yumenosaki, Eichi-kun.

Seiya: We mustn’t create a society where the privileged few monopolize all the profits and trample on their everyone else.

Far too much bitterness had built up throughout the application of the Special Student system, causing a great explosion…

Such as the tragedy that transpired in SS, and you’ll learn the same lesson by tracing the footprints Jin-kun left behind as the title of Super Idol pushed him to the brink.

Not to mention the events that led the greatest idol in history, “Akehoshi-kun,” to become a star in the sky…

Those were all the result of making someone bear a weight too heavy for the human vessel.

I believe we’re all meant for a life suited to our form, as a single human.

Modern society has no needs for gods and kings. I am making a contribution to aid in shaping this vision that our youths speak so passionately of.

That is my duty and choice, as someone who has lasted to this day by pure luck.

Let us descend from our thrones and liberate the treasures of our land; return the wealth we have been monopolizing to the people, as deserved.

Seiya: Though our magnates have yet to catch up to progress, dreaming to restore the old kings to power through this Project-Saga…

I’ve meant to conclude things in this way all along.

We Mentors will pass all our teachings to you, along with the limelight.

And we will go out with a bang just like this, as we retreat to the backstage, aiding you all from the shadows thereon after.

It’s in the nature of mentors to support their disciples, of adults to support children… That is the purpose of the tale that is Project Saga.

At the very least, I am committed to portraying it as such.

The heroes’ saga ends here; from now on, your lives in this reality begin.

That concludes my commentary. …By the way, the show is still going on, so you’d do well to sing instead of looking so grief-stricken.

I have great expectations for you, so show me everything you've got, alright?

Us winning this match will upset my calculation, you see. Not only do I find that undesirable, it’ll be so lamentable to know my son was so inadequate.

Hokuto: …Don’t look down on me. I’ve suffered through many defeats and tragedies, and I haven’t broken down from a single one.

I’ve inherited your endurance in not faltering at the face of any adversary, Father. No trial is hard enough to break me… No, I’m never losing to anyone, ever again.

Hokuto: Sure, Lilith will win Reverse Live, but after that…

I’m never losing to you again. Or, even if I lose the battle, I won’t lose hope. When I fall, I’ll lift my face and walk again.

I’ll become happy, Father. With the people I love — as just a single ordinary human.

Seiya: …I see. I’m so glad to hear that… Truly, I am.

Then let us sing together. With the both of us on stage, most of our audiences here are expecting the ensemble that us father and son play.

Let us answer their expectations. That’s what idols do.

Hokuto: I know. …I’ve become an idol too, Father. Just like you.

“♪~♪~♪”

[ ☆ ]

✦✦✦✦✦

← prev ✦ all ✦

#ensemble stars #enstars #enstars translation #hyenahunttl #s: saga #hokuto hidaka #seiya hidaka

[dragonologist-phd]

Owlcatober Day 20 - Void

The heroes arrive at Defender’s Heart, fulfilling their mission- but it’s not long before fate throws another surprising twist at them.

also on ao3

After what can only be called the longest day of Eden’s entire life, the sight of Defender’s Heart is almost enough to make her cry. She enjoys approximately forty minutes of calm before the storm stirs up again.

Everything goes according to plan, at first. They deliver Rekarth’s report to Anevia and Irabeth, both of whom immediately leap into action. Between barking orders and preparing defenses, they do spare a moment to thank the ragtag group, and their gratitude is quickly followed by a command to get some rest.

“We can take it from here,” Anevia tells Rekarth. “No offense, but you lot look too beat to be much use right now. You’ve done your part, and we’ve got a fighting chance because of you- now go get some shuteye.”

Eden has never seen Rekarth look so gratified. When he’s done soaking in the praise from his commanders, he leads Eden and Sendri to the back of the tavern, where a set of stairs dips into the darkness below.

“We can hunker down in the basement- nice and out of the way,” he says. He pauses at the top step, and then with more sincerity than Eden would have thought him capable of, turns to her and says, “Thanks, by the way. I wouldn’t have made it here without you.”

“I didn’t do it alone,” Eden points out.

“Yeah,” Rekarth agrees, cracking his knuckles. Realization doesn’t set in until Eden gives him a disapproving look, and when it does he rolls his eyes. “Oh, you meant- fine. Thanks for not blowing us up, Sendri.”

Sendri brightens at the recognition and grants Rekarth a sweeping bow. “It was my greatest pleasure!”

Eden laughs. “Now, I’m ready to- Seelah?”

All thoughts of rest fly from Eden’s mind as the paladin woman she spotted stops in her tracks and turns. Eden half-expects to go unrecognized, but no- Seelah’s face lights with recognition, and a grin spreads across her face.

“Hey! Everbright, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Eden says, standing up straighter. She can’t believe Seelah actually remembers her. “I’m the-”

“The smith down by the square, I remember!” Seelah pushes through the crowd to move closer, still smiling. She pulls at the sword on her hip, showing off the hilt, and Eden feels an odd swooping in her stomach as she recognizes her own craftwork in Seelah’s hands.

“Best weapons we ever had came from your shop,” Seelah says. “Glad to see you looking…well, alive.”

“You too,” Eden replies. “Of course, I knew you’d be fine. You’re- well, you’re you.”

It’s a silly thing to say, but Seelah grins in response all the same. “Aw, it’s all part of the job. And anyway, I had help. A new friend of mine. She’s…well, she’s different. But she’s got this power that I think could really change things.” An edge of awe creeps into Seelah’s tone. Eden has to fight back an irrational twinge of jealousy.

“You should meet her, later,” Seelah continues, oblivious. “She’s out in the city now, but we’ve got runners tracking her down. We’ll need her help for this big battle coming up.”

“Yeah,” Eden agrees, because she can’t think of anything else to say. “Good luck out there.”

“Who needs luck?” Seelah jokes. She slides her sword back into its sheath with another confident grin. “I’ve got an Everbright blade- I’m all set.”

Fortunately, someone else shouts for Seelah before Eden has to think of a response. Seelah gives her a quick wave goodbye and disappears into the crowd, leaving Eden to be scrutinized by Rekarth.

“So…” he drawls, “who was that?”

“Oh, that’s just Seelah. She’s a paladin,” Eden says, fighting to sound normal. “She’s been in my shop a couple times. That’s all.”

“Yeah…” Rekarth sounds doubtful, but he leaves it for now and turns back to Sendri-

But Sendri is gone.

“What the hells did that gnome do now?!” Rekarth cries. He takes off down the stairs, Eden close on his heels.

The basement is far, far brighter than it should be- it’s filled with a shining, blinding light, and as Eden squints into the glare she realizes it’s a portal. What she doesn’t know is how a portal got down here.

“Stay back!” Sendri’s voice sounds out from the center of the portal, and he does not sound nearly as panicked as he likely should. “I’ll be fine. I’m done running. But you two don’t have to do this.”

“What the blazes is that madman talking about?” Rekarth mutters, and Eden has no answer.

But even if she doesn’t have an answer, she knows what she has to do. “Come on, we can’t just leave him!”

Rekarth looks at her as if she’s lost her mind. “Yes,” he says, thoroughly baffled by Eden’s proclamation. “We can! This doesn’t concern us.”

Eden gives the tiefling a steely look. “Fine. I can’t leave him.”

Rekarth glances between her and the portal, his jaw grinding. “Dammit,” he finally says, and Eden knows it’s an agreement.

The decision is likely a bad one…but to sit here in safety while her new friend faces some unknown danger is undoubtedly worse. So Eden takes a deep breath, prepares to leave this place with its safety and security and Seelah behind, and with Rekarth at her side and Sendri up ahead, she steps into the void.

#owlcatober 2023 #ch: eden #through the ashes

[drsoulblast-official]

The Fourth SoulBlast Newsletter is here!

What's new?

Our Team Members have recently been working on SoulBast's Intro Sequence (GONER_MAKER replacement) and its path chart, where each individual ending and choice has animations which are still being planned! How many choices/animations are there? Well...

Here are the references (provided by Terra and Alternimo) showing what's next to come!

The Cosmic Starplaza Update is Here!

We decided to replace DELTARUNE: CHAPTERS REATOMIZED with a WIP Shift AU that has a couple Deltarune characters in original roles. It has some SwapSpin inspiration and some StoryShift inspiration, specifically the roles papyrus and sans are in. What does that mean? You'll have to wait and see!

Yes, the songs ARE back! Maybe!

The SoulBlast composers are cooking once more! This time for something with a much different tone to what is often teased here, but we hope that you still like it!

There isn't a thumbnail made yet, but it may be done alongside some other songs, which have a chance of coming out this month!

What's Terra been up to?

“It’s Terra again! I’m on vacation right now, but we’ve got a decent amount of content done. We’ve had a couple songs finished in the last week, and Alter and I have been planning out the SoulBlast opening sequence. I might not make it the first thing we do dialogue-wise as it’s super ambitious and big, although I had a really cool idea as of how to “realize it”. I don’t know if I’ll go forward with this idea, but who knows. That’s all I have to say for now, peace!”

What's Alternimo been up to, too?

“Hey, I’m back with another newsletter section! I’ve decided to do one every other week (mostly because of my current work pace, and also because Alter doesn’t necessarily entirely equal SoulBlast), but here we are again! As for what I’ve been up to…well, not a whole lot, to be blunt. I’ve been away on vacation after vacation, trip after trip…kinda doing some small work off and on, but nothing too crazy, and likely not until mid-June or so, when I get back from this big trip I’m on now. Not too much has been going on in the SP!Deltaswap (AKA CandlelitSeal (if you’re interested, DM me for more info!)) field, though I’ve been putting together a few last minute ideas and laying everything out for myself to track my progress. Preparing for some dialogue revisions too, alongside the designs for the rest of the main cast. SoulBlast-wise…not much either, though I’ve been helping out a bit with the intro sequence (which may or may not been teased somewhere in this newsletter) and some tiny logo tweaks. With that, though, I’ll quit my yapping, as there’s plenty of other (probably more important) content to be getting to.”

The SoulBast gets an update?

The SoulBlast Team has been working to improve the original logo! Here's what we've done so far, with different versions by Alternimo and SnowyBoi64

(Minor Logo Rework by Alternimo, although some color things would still be changed)

(Sprite Version by SnowyBoi64)

Speaking of SoulBlast Reworks...

The Character Guides are back, and are currently in a stage of early construction! Not much more is able to be said unfortunately, but we'll get updates to you whenever possible!

The SoulBlast Team has a New Member!

"Heya! I'm the I Man, and I recently joined the SB/NM team. I do some spritework, background music and maybe a bit of writing, if I'm feeling particularly wild. I've made a few works over the years and I have a few AUs of my own, (including two whole Underswap takes), but I figured I'd join this project because it seemed interesting (I was right). Anyways, I can only hope I live up to the expectations set for me, and I hope to see you in the future."

That's all!

Go check out our stuff below! The next newsletter will be posted in 2 weeks (since it’s biweekly)

YouTube: https://youtube.com/@soulblastau5574?si=fuh6MJy1Hgd4FVaT

SoundCloud: https://on.soundcloud.com/UVadRL6CSVdqxkRv9

Discord: https://discord.gg/3bAtNkxH2P

#undertale #deltarune #deltarune au #soulblast #soulblast au #terrasavior #au announcement

[jaewrotethis]

20- Nightmares...

What happened on this day was impacting enough to take over my night. My dreams consumed with what I’ve felt today. I send myself to my bed sooner than the rest. Pan became just another boy in the room full of boys after leaving me on the balcony of the big front room. I couldn’t care, though. I was too determined to think over everything that happened today. I wanted to be alone to pick my brain apart, my day apart. So to my room I go, turning away from the front room and into the dark, maze hallways.

Alright, do the thing. I tell the second voice in my head, since she managed to navigate through the halls this morning.

You do it.

How.

Just think about the room.

I close my eyes at the dark hallway.

Stay relaxed.

I breathe out and I picture my torn blankets, my ripped sheet. The broken dresser and fluff mess of the entire room. The cold and forever opened window directly across the entrance and the smaller door to its right. Another breath and then I open my eyes to the room given to me. I stand in front of the open door. The room I so ungratefully tore to shreds sitting quietly behind the threshold. I walk in slowly, trying to find a sense of home or maybe comfort, trying to convince myself that this is mine. Over to the mattress, away from the forever open window that leaks a cold, cold air to flush my room, I walk.

I stop to put the lamp back where it belongs, on my night stand then walk the room to replace everything back where it should be. I put all the drawers back into the beaten apart dresser and the trunk back into the closet. I pick up what’s left of the pillows that were gifted to me and put them on the head of the mattress. Then the ripped sheets and the torn open quilts. I make the bed with the pieces left over and crawl inside of it. Having to curl up to be covered completely by the ripped quilts.

The bed is cozy, it’s warm. I lay for hours, the night crawling on and on, longer and longer as I just think of my entire day. Too much to recall to sleep, too much to go over to drift off. I wish I could write down the stops my train of thought kept making and riding passed before I forget any of it. From waking up to fuzzy bugs all the way to fighting pirates and then ending the night on a new note with Pan. A note of him possibly saving me, though he’s done it about four times today I’m nearly certain it’s all set up. There’s so much, too much to keep track of.

Did Pan plan every last event?

Did he make sure I had no weapon on the pirate ship so he could give me one when I needed it most?

Could he have really shown me how to fly just so he could catch me from falling to my death?

Or was it just so he could take it away and give it back whenever he says so?

Did he make sure to save me from the Mermaids to mess with my head?

Was the whole Slightly thing just abuse or did Pan set that up?

Why would he set up something so fucked?

Is it because I denied his help of flight after the Treasure Hunt?

Is he really that petty?

Would he really stoop so low?

When sleep did come, it was not welcomed.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Again, I’m flying. Over the mountains of Neverland I can see every valley and spring and forest that I saw earlier today. Still so vivid in my memory, I won’t ever forget my first flight over Neverland. I fly free, no Pan under me to keep me airborne, just me and my happiness. The sun is warm on my skin, I feel like I belong somewhere, finally. I couldn’t stop smiling even if I wanted to.

I fly the route that I was taken on today as it’s so fresh in my mind still. Over the Dark Forest that surrounds the hideout and onward to the valleys beyond. Over soft grasses and hidden lagoons. It’s just when I’m approaching the mountains furthest from it all, behind all the valleys, that the magically blue sky has a gray cloud growing. A mean looking storm that was so far away earlier, now in front of me. I can’t seem to stop advancing towards the gray storm forming in the mountains, seeping into the sky like ink in water. My faith dwindles. And as I’ve learned, doubt cannot be planted when flying. Just one shift, just one little second of uncertainty and I’m falling from the sky. The storm growing, casting nighttime and nightmares over the island.

I try, oh how hard I try, to stay lifted. Up and down I go as the belief comes and goes. Coming when I remember how the happy faith felt just a moment ago and going just a second after as I feel the fear of how I almost just fell. Until I’m crashing to the forest floor, somehow now underneath me, valley and mountains gone.

It’s dark. The trees are black. The rain is light but cold. I suddenly know exactly why I need to get up and run. So, I’m running through the forest under the dripping canopy that streams the smallest bits of moonlight every few feet. I’m sprinting through bushes, branches, shrubs. Getting nicked by thorns and scrapped by wood, tripping over roots and stumbling through plants but I can’t stop running. If I let him run faster than me, if I let him close the distance he’ll end my life, I know he will. Blood begins dripping off my neck, down my chest with the searing pain of them being created.

I breathe in rhythm as I sprint. Fresh painful woulds lay deep on the back of my neck and along the bottom of my skull. My temples also cut open, leaking out my crimson blood. It burns painfully but there is no time to stop and clean wounds. The wind yanks my hair behind me as I run my open vest flapping along with it. I push through bushes, and slap through water. My mud stained boots dig into the soil underneath me, kicking up dirt with each step that I push behind me, arms out to pull myself forward, anything to get away, to keep running, to go fast, go further. My legs feel like led, my lungs are burning for air. My body suddenly is exhausted and tired, I’m drained. My own weight is too heavy to go on anymore. I’m out of stream, I can’t run any longer. My breathing harsh and my blood pounding in my ears, I rear right, skidding in the dirt around a sharp turn of a cliff.

My legs skid under me making me hit the ground, palms first. I push myself back up to my feet before I can lose precious seconds. I’m running not much longer, but so much faster before I burst through thick bushes. I jump through thick, tall, green stacks of plant before realizing there is no floor on the other side. The bushes sit on the top of the steep hill I am now tumbling down. Big rocks dig into my back, they slam into my arms, into my legs as I yelp and grunt to each one in angry pain. My sides roll over the sharp jungle floor that cuts, ripping my skin. My head tucked into my chest, knees slamming into dirt, I try using my arms to shield my head.

Finally the earth decides to show mercy with a flattened clearing. Ramming hard into a stump stops my agonizing fall as it flips me over. The pain is tricky. It strikes my spine and bites my fresh bruises. With each second that ticks by the pain cuts my skin then disappears to the shock trying to take over, only the shock fails and the pain returns stronger and deeper to the bone. My lungs vibrate inside my chest as the wind has been knocked from me, stunning me on the floor momentarily.

Flat on my back I stare up at the dark forest, panting and coughing once my breath finds me again, my vision a blur. The world is tipsy. I shake my head, grabbing at it to try and stop the new headache that rolls pain down my body. I hear a holler in the darkness from up above. Beyond the hill I fell from. A deep call of a certain someone in search of the one that isn’t at his command. Fear pins my heart to my chest. Pure terror floods my veins and adrenaline pumps my cells to sit me up, ignoring the throbbing pain in all my bruised muscles that ache to relax. The hollering growing louder. He’s getting closer. I need more distance.

“You can not hide! You’re exposed everywhere you go!”

My eyes wide, the sweat beading my forehead with the dripping blood as his words successfully frighten me. With each word my nerves spike higher and leap in my skin. What if he’s right? What if I don’t away, if I physically can’t get away? How much actual pain and torture could he cause, how much worse can it be than what’s already been horribly done? Out of breath and shaking with fear I force myself to stand up. My eyes dart around for his figure, or a hiding spot, or a weapon, or better yet, someone who will help me. A twig snaps behind me just as I’m fully standing, wobbly and riddled with weakening pain. I spin round, whipping my wet hair out of my face. Darkness engulfs the trees that surround me. A black smoke coming in. Another twig snaps. It’s too quiet. The wind stopped, the trees gone quiet, even the rain is gone. I hold my breath, turning in a circle, searching in the dark smoke clouding in, closer and closer, erasing most of the forest from view.

“Why run?”

Two small words spoken in my ear. I jump, choking on a scream. My heart pounds, matching my rapid breath and I can barely see his silhouette in the dark. He’s right in front of me, standing tall and broad. Not a single breath missing, not tired, worn, or even breaking a sweat. I know that demonic smirk is plastered on his face. I gasp turning to run but two strong hands dig into my shoulders. I yelp as I’m yanked back and thrown to the floor. I trip on my feet. I am tired. I can’t fight anymore. Dirt finds its way into my skin, opening new cuts on my hands. A groan whining from me but I’m only trying to see straight, to find any relief in any of the many aching pains.

“I told you. You aren’t capable of hiding from me. You are not able to defend yourself,” he snatches me up and throws me at a tree, like a toy.

I hit the ground, gasping and crying out but I bite my lip immediately. I regret the sounds of pain. Each noise of fear and pain I make gives him pride. And if he’s going to kill me, he won’t have the satisfaction of breaking me. I won’t let him have it. Though it seems like he knows this and has made his own personal game of trying to snatch it from me anyway. And I know I can’t let him win. So though I’m shaking with fear and critical pain I’m channeling any strength left to hide it from him. I crawl away, suddenly dressed back in my white asylum clothes, Lost Boy attire gone.

“You’re helpless, weak, and worthless,” his hands grab my shirt at both shoulders and yanks me at himself. Then Pan introduces a new type of fear to the game when he says, “I ought to let the boys have at you,” and throws me once more on the floor roughly near the bushes that peak through the black smoke.

Exiting the bushes comes Slightly. His face evil and yearning for a certain type of pleasure. Slightly reaches for me with ghostly hands in the dark and I can’t help the shriek scratching from my throat. I’m crawling backwards, away from the bushes when from behind Slightly, more boys emerge from the shrubs, the same look on their faces, the same evil hands trying to grab me.

“Scared, little Jane. Pathetic girl on my island, why are you still living?” I hear Pan’s cold voice behind me.

Pan’s hands grab my shoulders again, pulling me swiftly and so fast I don’t feel my body being slammed into the ground until it’s already happened. I gasp for air as he drags me. He pulls me in the wet dirt. I panic and kick, clawing at his hands.

“No! Let me go! Let go!” I thrash and pull away, trying so hard to get on my feet but he’s stronger, hes always so much stronger.

He yanks me hard making me cry out again and shoves me in front of him. I have no control over where my feet land and where my body is being sent, I can’t stop him from shoving me into a small cage that sits in the dirt.

“No, please! No, no, no! Let me go!” I fight him but his fist connects with my chin and I’m sent flying back against the wooden bars.

I’m jammed into the cage as he tries slamming the door shut, but I jump forward to grab the bars. I push on the door with everything left in me. I’m just barely stopping it from closing all the way but it’s really just him dragging it out. A mean smirk on his face, like he enjoys watching me try so hard for something he can so easily end with an effortless thrust of his arms. My teeth chatter with panic, I don’t want to die. If the door shuts and the click rings out, indicating it’s locked, all hope is lost. The door cannot close. I cannot die locked up.

“Pan, please! Please, don’t do this! Don’t lock me in-”

“If you want out so badly, get it done yourself,” he says harshly. “But we both know you’re too weak to fight for your fate. You’ll stay locked in here until you’re dead.” He spits.

“No,” I whimper, still pushing the door.

He leans in so our faces are close, having complete control of the indecisive door..

“Yes.” is his last word.

Then his arms thrust forward, forcing the door shut all the way. A satisfying click rings out in the exact moment the dark scene is snatched away.

- - -

“Jane! Open the door!”

What?

My eyes open to a yellow blur. I squint, making sense of the ceiling above me. There’s hard pounding at the door. My heart seems to have the same speed as it did in the dream and it’s making my body shiver and shake through a rapid pulse. My brow is damp and so is my back and neck. I breathe out, convincing myself that it was only a dream and I’m not in danger right now, I’m not locked away and I’m allowed to be alive..for the time being.

“Jane!” the door handle quivers roughly, “Open up!”

I shake my head, wiping my cheeks of tears and brow of sweat before swinging my feet over the bed. I fall to the door with sleep swimming behind my eyes and shuffle with the lock before swinging it open. K stands outside my door. His shirt is sweaty, and wet around the collar. His face is red like he’s been running for a while and his eyes are wide with concern. One hand placed on the door frame.

“Are you okay? What’s going on in here?” he speaks rushed and steps to look inside my room. I back up, to let him have a look but my distracted eyes drift to the door.

“I didn’t lock it...” I whisper.

“What?” he urges.

“I-I, I’m not sure,” I touch the back of my neck, looking down and biting my lip.

“Are you alright?”

I nod my head quickly, “Fine. I’m fine. Sorry-I-it, I don’t...”

“What happened? You were screaming, like you were being murdered, what did you do?” he steps inside now.

I back up again, I grab at my hair. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-I mean, I’m sorry I woke you,” I say, still trying to calm my heart. I move around him to look down the hall, hoping I didn’t wake any others.

“What happened?” he asks me from inside my room.

“Did I wake anyone else?” I ask as I finish scoping the hall.

A door four down opens up and on instinct I jump back inside my room, bumping into K but I don’t care. I close the door, feeling fear bubble up again in my chest and turn straight into hyperventilating. K looks at me oddly. My wide eyes meet his and he goes to place his hands on my shoulders but pulls back himself when I glitch away.

“Jane. Breathe.” he says, trying to gain my focus.

I hold his stare and obey, inhaling deeply, then exhaling. It works as I feel the prickles of panic begin to disappear.

“I-It was-uh, just a nightmare. I didn’t mean to wake you, I-”

“You already said that,” he smiles.

I breathe out harshly, “Did I wake anyone else?”

“Calm down, would you?” he widens his smile. “I was up training, you didn’t wake me.”

I listen to him again and I breathe deeply through my nose. He waits patiently for me to find my relax as I’m replaying the convincing in my head;

I’m not in danger I’m allowed to be alive right now. There’s a door right there, I’m not locked up.

It’s alright. I’m fine.

“Nightmares are common here. What was it?” he asks me.

I shake my head. “I shouldn’t have woke you, I’m alright, really,” I go to open the door but he backs away from it.

“What was it?”

He stares at me with a soft look like he knows what I fear, like he has the same fears. He seems to drop some sort of wall and some how I know it’s something I’ve forgotten how to do. I can feel himself letting any restraint go and opening up to be vulnerable. Even more so, he is daring me to join him. His arms open up to me, challenging me to be as vulnerable as he is, to share any fear, to allow any comfort.

And then, I can’t stop my feet walking to him or my arms opening for him, I don’t want to stop them. I reach over his head and embrace him in a deep hug. I’m stiff at the foreign contact but then it’s just too easy to relax into him. He feels really warm and he smells like damp forest.

For a moment, I’m not in Neverland. I’m in a different place, a place I haven’t been to in so long or might’ve even forgotten it existed. It’s a warm place, a place I don’t think I want to ever leave. He holds me in this hug until I feel ready to pull away and when I do, it’s nothing but comfortable silence as I walk to the bed. I lead him, somehow knowing he won’t move unless I move him in my room. My eyes glaze over to my torn blankets thrown on the floor again, and the lamp that was once on my night stand beside them.

I clear my throat and sit with him on my bed, “I, I don’t want to remember...”

“We all get nightmares,” he tells me.

I exhale, “There was, I mean... it was too dark,”

He waits.

“It was Pan. What do you think happened?” I say harsher than I meant. I drop my head, exhaling.

“Even more common. It was a dream. It wasn’t real.” he assures me.

I look at him. I find a want inside of me to scoot closer to him, so I do. He doesn’t flinch or stiffen or feel uncomfortable in any way so I relax even more by resting my head on his shoulder. Such new contact and an experience I’ve never had before, it warms my insides. As if some normality finally found me.

“He is real, K, and he’s in the next room,”

K stays quiet for a moment, “What did he do?” he asks finally.

“What he always does. Brings fear, plays mind games on a power high. Makes it impossible to feel any sort of strength, then expects my soul in return,” I spit.

“We know a different guy,” he defends the master of my nightmares.

“He hurts, K,” I say, knowing he can’t deny that.

It’s quiet for a long time as the night creeps on. I begin to feel my eyes drifting close with a heavy sleep. No longer wishing to remain in the pity party, I get up and walk to the head of the bed. I crawl inside of my torn sheets and get comfortable. I want to ask him to continue the contact. A concept so odd to me, I can’t find how to do it.

Just ask.

I bite my lip, searching so hard for the words to say.

Just do it.

I inhale, feeling dizzy from such an unknown request.

Say it. Just say it.

I open my mouth to speak, but my tongue goes dry.

Just say it!

“You don’t have to leave,” I finally spit out.

He looks at me from the edge of the bed, “Jane. Pan, um, wouldn’t, I mean there’s a, type of...”

I stare at him, understanding that of course Pan still has control, but also so saddened by his rejection of my plead for more comfort. A plead that was so, so hard to put out there. It’s only more anger towards Pan. As if he thinks he has some sick claim over me that stops any type of comfort I might find in his camp.

“Right,” I barely whisper and turn the other way.

Try one more time.

I hear him get up off the bed.

Just one more time.

“K,” I stop him.

“Yeah?”

“...I won’t tell, if you don’t,”

I hear him exhale and I know I did it, I took control back.

He crawls onto the mattress with me, beside me. Such contact as laying with someone is an entire mystery to me, something I’ve never ever felt before. Never have I ever felt such closeness with any person. The asylum was too hectic to get cozy with the girls and before that my life was too...unstable to bask in boys’ arms. Something inside of me tells me to be afraid, but it’s not loud enough. The yearn for comfort is so much louder. K doesn’t get into the covers with me, he lays on top of the messed up blankets, on the edge of the bed. I turn to face him, testing my own waters. Seeing what feels like too much, and what is not enough. He seems so calm, as if he could fall asleep at any second. It assures my decision to ask him to stay with me. He isn’t the slightest bit interested in doing anything that would be at me. He is only here because it’s what I want, what I asked for. And if he is so calm and collected sharing a bed with me, than I can be to. It only assures me even more when he lets me curl on him as I please, not moving a single inch unless I do it for him. He doesn’t make any move to get closer to me, only lets me get as close I feel comfortable with. It’s nearly perfect.

“Thanks, K,” I whisper to him. “Goodnight,” he whispers back.

I wipe my cheek of the small tear left over from the nightmare. I feel my smile and get even cozier against his chest. I nudge his arm with my shoulder so he knows he can close the cuddle. He obeys and wraps his arm around me when I settle. I’ve never felt so comforted. It’s ecstasy. He is so warm. He doesn’t smell bad but of moss and wet wood. I find the label for the place I’ve never been to. It’s safety. For the first time, in a very, very long, I feel completely safe. Nothing else but safeness, not even stress. No fear, no anxiousness. I’m safe in this bed, beside my friend. I close my eyes and remain lying with my friend until sleep engulfs us both.

I should’ve known Pan would destroy the only comfort, the only safety I had. For the next morning, K was taken away by Pan’s orders. All because I had a bad dream.

#neverland #screenwriting #peter pan fanfic #peter pan #screenplay #peterpan x reader #tinkerbell #the promised neverland #long reads #peter pan fandom

[aquietwritingcorner]

You'll Have to Go Through Me

Title: You’ll Have to Go Through Me Day: Whumptober 2023, Day 28 Prompt: “We might not make it to the morning, so go on and tell me now” Bloody knife/Sacrifice/ “You’ll have to go through me”  Fandom:  TMNT 2003 AU Word Count: 1613  Author: aquietwritingcorner/realitybreakgirl Rating: T  Characters: Donatello, Leonardo, Raphael, Michelangelo, Bishop Warning: NA Summary: Bishop has ambushed Leo and eight-year-old Donnie while they were out. Leo isn’t about to let Bishop get his hands on Donnie, but will he be able to hold Bishop off until help arrives? Notes: This is part of an AU I’ve had forming in my head where, during a crisis with the Time Scepter, Don sacrificed himself to save everything. Instead of it killing him, though, it turned him into a baby, and his family has needed to raise him all over again.       AO3 || ff.net

__________________________________

You’ll Have to Go Through Me

Leo’s face twisted in a snarl as he held his katana, his expression focused on the cruel madman that stood before him. His other katana was on the ground behind him, having flown there after Bishop had dislodged it from his hand. Leo knew it was there, but he didn’t dare take his eyes off of Bishop for a second to get it. Not with Donnie behind him, too. There was no way he was going to let Bishop get his hands on his little brother.

His literal little brother.

The eight-year-old had done remarkably well in the ambush. He’d only been training with his jo—he was too short right now for a bo—for a few months, and he’d only been allowed to rooftop hop without help for a few weeks. Yet he’d had to make use of both new sets of skills in the ambush, and he’d done very well, even if he was scared to death. Leo was beyond proud of him for it.

Yet it hadn’t been enough. Somehow, Bishop had managed to funnel them to this abandoned alley where he’d backed them into a corner. It didn’t matter, though. All Leo had to do was keep Bishop away from Donnie long enough for Raph and Mikey to arrive. In the meantime, though, Bishop had the upper hand—and they all knew it.

“Trying to protect your brother, Leonardo?” Bishop asked as he kept sharp eyes on them. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to harm him.”

“Now why don’t I believe that for a second, Bishop?” Leo shot back. His awareness shot up, making sure he kept track of Donnie. He could hear his brother scramble back to hide behind some trash that was there.

Bishop snorted. “Please. Do you know the value a younger subject has? There’s far more potential there. No, I’m not going to harm Donatello. I have plans for him.”

Leo could hear Donnie whimper behind him. He couldn’t blame his brother. It was terrifying to hear that as an adult, much less as a child.

Leo growled. “You won’t touch him,” he said. He could hear Donnie backing up even more, giving Leo plenty of room.

“Come, Leonardo. Do you really think that you’re going to beat me? More than that, it’s almost morning. What do you think will happened when the good people that live in these apartments wake up to find a giant turtle creature attacking a human government agent?” Bishop smirked. “But if it makes you feel better, I can tell you my plans for young Donatello.”

Leo’s focus sharpened even more, and he settled into a highly dangerous state. He was positive that there was nothing good in what Bishop had planned for Donnie. “We might not make it to the morning,” Leo threatened, “so you had better go on and tell me what you have planned for my brother now.”

“You mean you won’t make it until the morning,” Bishop said. “I will, I’ll have my prize, and your sacrifice will fuel more research.”

Donnie let out a small, scared gasp, and Leo wasted no time with anymore talking. He charged Bishop with a yell. Steel clanged against armor as Bishop blocked the hit. Leo didn’t let that stop him, though, and quickly delivered a strike to the man. Bishop couldn’t dodge it, but he did use its momentum to lead into another attack. The alley rang with the sounds of the fight as the two battled it out. Bishop was, as always, fast and swift, inhumanly so. However, Leo was fueled by the rage that came with protecting his brother, and he didn’t let up or give an inch.

And yet it wasn’t enough. Bishop managed to gain the upper hand, sending Leo crashing to the ground with a strike to his head. His katana flew from his hand, and Bishop picked it up, twirling it around. “Good-bye, Leonardo. I’ll make sure your body is put to good use.”

Bishop raised the sword, ready to plunge it down. Suddenly, he reeled back in pain as something stabbed him in the kidney from behind. He stumbled back and tripped over something that was ankle height that hadn’t been there before, dropping the katana. Rolling with the fall, despite the pain in his back, Bishop looked up to see what had happened.

To his surprise, young Donatello was standing between Bishop and Leonardo, a bloody knife in one hand, and his staff in the other.

“Y-you’ll have to go through me!” he declared loudly, clearly set on defending his brother, even if his voice was shaking. “So—stay away!”

“You brat,” Bishop said as he rose to his feet. “I’ll take pleasure in using your DNA to make a new army out of—and in charting every second of how you grow.”

The young turtle paled, clearly scared, and he backed up a step. But he quickly set his jaw, holding his staff with confidence as Bishop advanced. Behind him, Leonardo blinked himself awake and shook his head. His eyes widened as he took in the scene in front of him.

“Donnie, no!” He cried out, grabbing the young turtle by the belt and pulling him away at the last second, rolling a few feet away with Donnie in his arms. A sizzle from Bishop’s wrist stun-gun crackled, the shot having landed right where Don had been.

Leo grit his teeth and pulled himself to his feet, shifting Donnie to his shell and picking up his fallen katanas. Bishop was already on his feet. Leo scanned the area. There had to be a way out of here!

“Just hang on to me, Donnie,” Leo said, and he felt his brother’s grip on him tighten.

Bishop launched towards them, but before he could get far, two shapes descended on him.

“Stay away from our brothers!” Raph yelled.

“Yeah, you’re not on the approved human list for Donnie,” Mikey shot back.

Bishop jumped back, having to focus on Mikey and Raph at the moment.

“Leo, go!” Raph yelled. “Get Donnie out of here!”

“What about you?” Donnie cried out.

“We’ll be right behind you!” Raph said.

“Right,” Leo said, waiting for his opportunity.

It took a moment, but Raph and Mikey gave him and opening, and Leo took it, moving as fast as he could. But Bishop had anticipated it, or perhaps had given them the opening, because he lunged right at them.

“I’ll have the brat, and you three will just be a bonus!” Bishop said, his wrist gun powering up, aimed right at Leo and Donnie

And then Leo felt Donnie’s arm tighten on his neck and felt more than saw Donnie’s other arm lash out. His bloody knife lodged itself in Bishop’s wrist gun, clearly having hit something vital as the thing started sparking.

Leo continued his path forward, not even looking back as he heard Bishop’s yell and an explosion. He didn’t acknowledge Donnie’s yell of “Ha! I knew it!” He felt more than saw Raph and Mikey coming up behind him. And he didn’t slow down until they were far away and well hidden from Bishop, taking a breather in a small hidden tunnel.

“Alright, Leo, hand over Donnie to Mikey and let me look at ya.” Raph said.

Leo nodded, and Donnie went to Mikey, holding onto his hand as Raph helped Leo sit down and looked him over. “Looks like you’ve probably got a concussion,” Raph said. “Although I don’t think anyone’s surprised. You hurt anywhere else?”

“Just minor things,” Leo said. “Donnie?”

“I’m fine, Leo!” Donnie piped up. He left Mikey’s side and hurried to Leo’s. “Leo, are you sure you’re alright?”

Leo pulled Donnie in. “I am, thanks to you,” he said, giving his little brother a hug. “You were very brave, standing up to Bishop like that.”

Donnie buried his face in Leo’s shoulder, letting his brother pull him into his lap. “I thought he was going to kill you!” Donnie said. “I was scared!”

Leo pressed his beak to Donnie’s head. “I know. But I’m proud of you, little brother. You did so well.”

Donnie tilted his head up to look at Leo and smiled, even if Leo could still see the fear and the stress behind his eyes. They’d have to talk about that later with Master Splinter. But for now, it was good enough, and Leo smiled back at his brother.

“Hey—I gotcha something,” Mikey said with a smile, bending down to grin at Don. He held out what looked like Bishop’s half-exploded wrist gun with Donnie’s knife still in it.

Leo made a face. “Mike, are you even sure that’s safe?”

“I dunno. Maybe,” Mike said, as Donnie gleefully took it, already looking over it.

“Mike,” Raph said, warning in his voice.

“Don’t worry, it’s safe!” Donnie said. “I don’t see any tracking devices on it, and it’s disconnected from the powerpack, it doesn’t look like its got any way to hold a charge.”

Leo sighed, and Raph reached out to rub Donnie on his head. “You did good, Donnie. Now get your toy and let’s get you and Leo back home before Master Splinter starts looking for us.”

Donnie nodded and got off of Leo’s lap as Raph offered Leo a hand up. The group started down the tunnels, but it escaped no one’s noticed that on the journey home and for the next few days, as Leo’s concussion healed, Donnie stuck close to Leo.

This event had left a mark on him, and had revealed that Bishop was after Donnie, but no matter what came, the family knew that they would face it together.

#Whumptober 2023 #no.28 #You'll have to go through me #TMNT #TMNT 2003 #TMNT AU #fanfic #Donatello #Leonardo

[starified-lizzy]

I have zero contractual obligation to do this, but I’m doing this anyways because I think it’s genuinely a really cool app, especially for note-takers (both for professional, school, and personal usage).

EVERNOTE BABY (it also has a desktop version!!!)

I was watching TikTok before it gets banned, as one does, and I came across a video of someone talking about the whole issue with Google Docs issuing the stuff you write in a doc to train AI.

I don’t know what compelled me, but I went into the comment section to see what others had to say, and saw someone recommend Evernote for- not only keeping track of notes for stories, but also being able to add media and other stuff pretty easily (I’ve only used the note-writing bit since I’ve got it [2 days ago], so idk how that part works just yet).

The home page of Evernote is really nicely structured imo. You have notes at the top, and everything else at the bottom. There’s other options to add as well in settings, it’s not limited to just those three, but that’s all I personally see a use for with what I’m using the app for.

Now time to show off the cool shit this app can do in the notes section because that’s what I mainly use this app for, using an example from the character notes for the FNF au!

The larger and bolder text is done similarly to Microsoft Word and Google Docs, where there’s a bar above the keyboard that has all the text options.

You can bold, italics, underline, strike through, change text size, create a bulleted list(or a numbered/lettered one if you prefer that), you can indent your shit so that you can now format text to school standards (how every English paper demands an indent with a new paragraph 😒), and more.

That little grey bar separating Nene from Darnell, and Darnell for DD, is done by putting three asterisks (***) OR three equals (===) on a line and then starting a new line. The app will automatically turn it into that kickass grey bar!

There is (sadly, imo) an option to use AI to “clean up” your notes/text. If you don’t want it, don’t use it. I’d prefer if they didn’t have AI in the app all together, but, to me, it’s really the only downside to this app. And- in their defense- as far as I know, they aren’t using it to steal your data or train AI like Google is.

So, once again, not a contractual obligation, but I do genuinely like this app literally in just the two-ish days I’ve used it so much that I’m literally actually planning on moving all my notes regarding my stories to it.

I think I’ll still keep actually writing my stories on the built-in notes app, but that’s mainly because the format I write in is so I can easily keep track of what I need to italicize or not, and using the built-in functions of Evernote for that will make transferring it to ao3 so much more difficult imo.

So, I’ll personally keep the stories to the notes app, but transfer the actual notes to Evernote because it’s formatted better :>

#evernote #fanfic writers #writerblr #writing resources #female writers #ao3 writer #fnf au #fnf corruption au #putting those there to summon my people #sponsorship; but I’m not being paid to do this #i genuinely like this app enough to do this

[the-bi-space-ace]

16, 25, 47, 49, and/or 96 for the writing ask :]

Thanks for the ask ☺️

16. where is your favorite place to write?

In my bed. I love writing in my bed. It’s cozy. I always have my emotional support water bottle, headphones, and some sort of snack. Plus I like to be warm ☺️

25. what’s your revision or rewriting process like?

I usually write a first draft and then let it sit for a little bit. My partner reads it to fix any grammar or spelling errors and check for plot holes. Once I know what I have to fix I get to fixing what my partner found. Sometimes I know I need to work on one weak section and just pick away at it while flipping between projects. I try to write everything so far in advance that I’m never in a pinch to rewrite. I usually move my dialogue around first if there’s any I can use and write around it.

47. what story are you most proud of?

Oh this is a great question. As far as long fics go I’ll have to say Keep These Shadows Out. It was really my first fic with extensive planning. It makes me extremely happy to reread and I’ll always think fondly of it.

Shorter fics I’ll have to say Oh, Shut Up. My first ever fic and it was Echo & Crosshair centric (so right up my alley). It’s just so sweet. It’s exactly what I wanted to write and it’s so soft and I just get calm vibes from that fic. Very proud of it to this day.

49. do you want to be published some day?

Ya know it would be cool! I’m certainly a long way from being ready for something like that but if I ever published original work I think it would be one of the cooler things I’ve done. I’ve been writing since I was very young, always had an interest in it. If I have a story I really felt strongly about telling I would write it and it would be cool to publish it.

96. romantic/social sideplots: interesting or irritating?

it’s a mix of interesting and irritating for me. I love messy background relationships outside of the plot. It’s a big part of why I write like I do. There’s usually other issues, other relationships, happening outside of the main plot and storyline. It makes it harder for the characters to push forward in the story. Something is always kind of standing in their way whether that be a relationship they have to sort out or an actual larger plot point. BUT. I definitely think there’s a way to do them right and sometimes it’s hard to focus on a story if a romantic subplot gets tossed in the mix half way through and you’ve got NO CLUE where it came from. I do not like it coming out of nowhere. There are also plenty of stories that get completely derailed by a romance subplot that it didn’t need. The subplot has to be done right for me to like it, it can’t just exist because the writers felt like every single story required a romance.

(I’m going on a tangent now) And another thing! Sometimes! When the subplots! Are built on misunderstandings! And they happen over and over again! I get frustrated! Like just talk to each other!

My fics are primarily about the relationships, the plot just puts them in situations to hash it out. I love the messy, chaotic mix of different types of relationships at play but. Yeah. I want it to make sense in the story if it’s there.

I hope that made sense I got all off track half way through 😅😅😅

#thanks for asking! #I got wordy I’m so sorry 😅 #Ask Ace #🧡

[goatsandgangsters]

shadow and bone episode 6 liveblog: all two minutes of it before I turned off the TV

wow Baghra sure doesn’t…….. give a flying fuck that Alina plans to kill her son. which would be fucked up in a vacuum, but like. in the books, her motivation THE ENTIRE TIME is “saving him.” her ENTIRE THING is that SHE DOES NOT CARE about anything but herself and her son’s survival. EVERYTHING ELSE is expendable, the entire country is expendable, even Alina is expendable. BUT SURE!!! LET’S JUST NOT CARE THAT THE ONLY ONE OF YOUR MANY CHILDREN YOU BOTHERED TO RAISE AND THE ONLY CONSTANT OVER LIKE 800 YEARS OF YOUR LIFE IS GONNA GET MURDERATED

I am paused two minutes into the episode debating if this show is worth finishing

Darkling stans, I’ve always thought our section of the fandom unfairly vilified Baghra. but I am now maintaining that opinion only about book!Baghra. this is extremely cruel writing.

god. even book!darkling—an objectively worse and Deader Inside person than his show counterpart—had the decency to be extremely fucked up over Baghra’s death. and she just isn’t phased by the reverse prospect at all?

how did book!darkling, an objectively worse person who did far worse to everyone around him, get a more sympathetic treatment than what we’re doing now? like, what was the point of all the work they did to humanize the character and make him more three-dimensional, who DOESN’T EVEN DO HALF THE HEINOUS THINGS AS HIS BOOK COUNTERPART, only to turn around and take away sympathy for him that existed in the books

I was already expecting this liveblog would be a big rant about the decision to have baghra HELP alina with the amplifiers even though that is so outrageously counter to Literally Everything She Stands For And Believes In, but this just decked me in the face, so we might not even get far enough for me to do That Particular Rant

I’ve turned off the TV

an hour has passed, I’ve taken a shower, I’ve continued to debate with myself if I should just be done with the entire franchise and care about things that are actually good, instead of caring too much about things because I wish they were good

we’ll see what I decide. I’m gonna sleep on it 

don’t tell me anything / be very vague. I can ask Kara specifics for my mind-making-up-process but I still want to have control over what/how much info I take in to make that decision 

I really……. didn’t foresee a world where I wouldn’t like season 2

because like, I read the books. on the whole, I enjoyed them. even though objectively 5 of them are mediocre at best. I made it through. I had fun. they’re not good, but they’re entertaining, and that has value. and that was always my assurance. “well, if nothing else, the show won’t be WORSE than the books.” and I’m not so sure about that right now.

all things considered, I’m actually the world’s most easy-to-appease Darkling Stan. I don’t want a different ending. I like both deaths, in r&r and row. honestly, all I’ve ever wanted is for the narrative to be less heavy-handed on lecturing the audience, stop telling me how I’m supposed to feel, and respect the tragedy of someone who’s fought so hard and so long that there’s nothing left of him. Respect that that’s tragic.

and based on season 1, I thought, perfect, you’re golden, on the right track, just keep this up. I’m looking forward to that sweet sweet tragedy 

and I do not understand how this version of the character—who is nowhere near as bad as his book counterpart—is being treated with even less sympathy. I don’t understand it. his own mother doesn’t give a shit??? you can’t even give him THAT? there is not a single soul in this whole entire world with even a scrap of sympathy, despite the fact that there are multiple characters in the book who feel that? they trust the audience so little? 

my ask was so minimal. respect the tragedy of the character. and right now, it seems like they’re doing a WORSE job than the book did. 

#episode 6 verdict (minutes 1–2): I made it through rule of wolves but I might not make it through this #don’t tell me anything / be very vague #I can ask kara for specifics for making-up-my-mind but I still wanna have control over what/how much info I take in to make that decision #sab liveblog

[projectstardog]

Launch Announcement

When I laid out my goals for 2023 in January this year, I mentioned how I had ambitions to make a feature film called Empty Pages. It would be an anthropomorphized version of Laika and the Sputnik 2 mission, showing her fate as the first animal to ever go into orbit with tragic results. I picture it being an animated adult drama, influenced by movies like When the Wind Blows, Apollo 13, Titanic, and the Plague Dogs. I’ve been quietly planning and preparing it for well over a year at this point. I had to research historical details, learn how to make a screenplay, constantly revise the writing, design the characters, get feedback from friends, etc. With today being the anniversary of the real Sputnik 2 launch, it’s only fitting that things go public now.

The first phase of work is just about done. A new draft of the screenplay is in progress, and I’m feeling confident that it’ll be a good foundation to build upon. So the next phase of work, which I’m calling Project Star Dog, will have four main parts to it:

1.) Storyboarding the entire script from front to back, and editing the stills together into a full-length demo reel for the movie.

2.) Hiring a cast of freelance voice actors to dub over the storyboards and create guide tracks for all the main characters’ dialogue.

3.) Composing a full soundtrack for the storyboards, potentially with professional music software if I can afford it.

4.) Adding basic sound design, foley, and audio mixing to the storyboard reel as the finishing touches.

On top of all this, there’s also character model sheets to make, environments and props to design, concept art to draw, and trying to get the word out. The voice actors will be by far the costliest part, and so far I’ve been saving up my own money to afford them when the time is right. I’ve set up new social media accounts to help promote the project and share updates on it as I go. If my current plans work out, I hope to have this storyboard reel finished by the end of 2024. I’ll most likely post it to YouTube once it’s ready. What will happen then? At this stage it’s too early to tell, and I’ll be honest and say I’m not sure where it could go from there. But until then, getting a full storyboard reel is the priority, so that’s what I’m putting everything I have into.

Although I picture most of this being a solo project for now, I’m more than open to collaborating with other artists and creators to help speed things up. If you think you have something to offer the project, send an email or DM me at any of the links listed below. I don’t have a ton of money to spare, but I’m willing to work out payment agreements for anything that could help artistically. Even just following one of the accounts or sharing things around would be an enormous help for getting this campaign as far as it can go.

Online indie animation is currently in a renaissance. Things Helluva Boss, Lackadaisy, Murder Drones, Digital Circus, etc. are paving the way for a new era of the medium. Combine that with the long-overdue victories won by the WGA strikes this year, and the future feels brighter than ever for the scene. I want to try throwing my hat in the ring with a story I hope will connect with people, and emotionally resonate with them. The process of getting there will be hard and time consuming, but at this point, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Business email: [email protected]

LINKS:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ProjectStarDog

Twitter: https://twitter.com/ProjectStarDog

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMsdX2ysfKxEwCCIcYHOyvQ

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/project_star_dog

Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/projectstardog.bsky.social

Newgrounds: https://projectstardog.newgrounds.com

#projectstardog #laika #animation #indie #sputnik 2 #anthro #furry #announcement