#Josh: ok but how do you know I won’t tell Maddie?

[bucksboobs]

“Eddie tells Tommy first” “Eddie tells Maddie first” Eddie tells Josh because Josh is the only gay person he knows that won’t immediately blab to someone who’ll blab to someone who will blab to Buck.

#Josh: ok but how do you know I won’t tell Maddie? #Eddie: because you’d much rather hold this over me #Josh: fuck you’re right… fine deal but you have to bring me snacks once a week until you get the guts to tell Buck #Eddie: fuck you. deal. #Josh Russo #Eddie Diaz #buddie #911 abc

[stardustshelb]

"Strawberry" Part Six - The End

TW: Language and sexual content

Word count: 7,939

Chapter Sixteen

The worst part about the bachelorette trip, other than my inevitable goodbye to Josh, was the bachelorette trip in itself. And as horrible as that sounds coming from the maid of honor, it was the truth. This trip has been full of drama and part of me wondered if Riley regretted ever planning it. If it weren’t for meeting Josh, I’m sure I would have been miserable the entire time. Then again, none of the drama would have existed had I not met Josh in the first place. Maybe I was the problem all along. I couldn’t shake the thought of being the reason why this trip had been such a bummer. I rolled over to check the time on my phone. I could tell it was morning from the daylight entering through the sheer curtains, but I didn’t expect it to be already past 10:00 a.m. I couldn’t believe I slept in so late; I couldn’t believe nobody woke me up. At the same time, I had no idea what was even on the itinerary for today. Maybe I really was the root problem of this trip. I turned off DND to find zero missed notifications. Ouch. 

I rolled out of bed and felt a slight headache forming. I wasn’t sure if it was due to the three glasses of wine or bawling my eyes out before bed. I glanced at myself in the full-length mirror beside the bed and noticed how swollen my eyes were. Yep, definitely from crying. I needed to get some cold water on my face ASAP. I made my way out of my room and across the hall to the bathroom. 

When I walked out into the hallway, I noticed the house was eerily quiet. It almost felt like I was home alone. I walked into the living room hoping to find a warm body, but it was empty. I checked the dining room and the kitchen—both were a ghost town. I glanced out the window and felt my stomach drop. The rental car was gone. Was everyone hanging out without me?

“Hello?” I called out but didn’t get a response. In a panic, I made my way to Riley’s room and didn’t even knock before entering. I found her sitting on her bed with her headphones in her ears and she was staring down at her phone. She jumped when she realized I was standing in front of her. 

“Shit!” She yelled as she took her airpods out.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” I said as I took a seat next to her on her bed.

“I’ve been on Twitter all morning,” Riley said.

“And?” I asked.

“I don’t think anyone knows who we are, but there is a lot of speculation about you specifically,” Riley said.

“Why’s that?” I asked.

“Well, did you realize that yours and Josh’s hands were touching?” Riley asked me while she held her phone out for me to see. As if I were seeing Abby’s TikTok for the first time, I was shocked that I had missed that detail. Our pinky fingers were touching as we sat on the living room floor. I don’t even remember our hands doing that. It must have been a subconscious need to want to feel connected to him.

“Shit,” I said.

“Have you heard from Josh this morning?” Riley asked.

“Not a word,” I said with a sigh. 

“Well, I don’t care if I sound immature, but you can’t be the first one to text him,” Riley said.

“I won’t,” I said. “Hey, where the fuck is the rental car?” I asked when I realized why I came to her room in the first place. 

“Abby got so upset that she booked a hotel for herself last night. I told her she was being ridiculous, but… Well… That’s Abby,” Riley said while shrugging her shoulders.

“I know I have been a shitty friend to you this weekend, but–” I started.

“Nope,” Riley said as she held her hand up to silence me. “I refuse to let Abby speak poorly of you, so I will hold you to the same rule. You’re both important to me and I refuse to listen when you guys try to talk shit about one other.”

“Ok fine,” I said, rolling my eyes.

“She will be back this afternoon. I tried to talk her out of leaving, but when I realized she had already made up her mind, I told her she could take the car,” Riley said.

“What about Maddie and Brooke?” I asked.

“As far as I know, they’re in the dark about what happened last night. I just told them that Abby needed to get away for a bit because there was a blow up, and they didn’t ask questions,” Riley said.

“Wow, really? They weren’t even the least bit curious?” I asked confusingly.

“Actually, Brooke said she was waiting for there to be a fist fight between you and Abby all weekend, so they weren’t surprised honestly,” Riley said with a laugh.

“I wanted to beat her ass so bad last night,” I said, forming a fist.

“You’ve literally never punched anyone,” Riley said, rolling her eyes.

“I’d gladly let her be the first,” I said while punching the palm of my hand.

“It’s the last day of our trip. Can we avoid conflict today? Pretty please?” Riley asked as she put her hands together like she was begging. 

“I will be on my absolute best behavior,” I said as I took her hands in mine.

“Bestie, why are your eyes so swollen?” She asked as she rubbed her thumb below my eye.

“I cried myself to sleep because Josh left after the TikTok fiasco,” I said as my voice cracked.

“Why didn’t you come get me? I would have cuddled with you,” Riley said.

“I didn’t want to bother you. It sounds like you were busy coddling Abby anyways,” I said with a smirk.

“You should have. I didn’t get any sleep last night anyways. I definitely will be going to bed early tonight,” Riley said as she let out a yawn. “We have to be at the airport by 6:00 a.m. tomorrow.”

“Don’t remind me,” I said, throwing my body on the bed like I was a child throwing a tantrum.

“Yes, ma’am, so you better not stay up all night with you-know-who,” Riley said as she playfully poked my side.

“Well, I can always sleep on the plane,” I said as I stuck my tongue out at her.

We decided to spend the morning packing our suitcases and getting everything ready for a quick exit tomorrow morning when we’d have to walk out the door by 4:30 a.m. Abby made it back from her dramatic hotel getaway, but I had yet to see her come out of her room. I wouldn’t have cared if she spent the whole day isolated, but I knew we owed Riley a great last day of her bachelorette trip. I would play nice because I knew that after tomorrow, I wouldn’t have to see her again until Riley’s wedding at the end of next month. And then after that… never again. Despite moving away, Riley was still having her wedding in Oklahoma because all of her family still lived there. I was already looking forward to the days she’d be back home while we prepped and planned for her big day. School would be out by then and I could devote all of my time and energy to being her maid of honor. The one she deserved from the start.

“Are you ready?” I heard Riley ask when she popped into my room.

“Yep,” I said as I grabbed my phone off of the charger and my purse off of the bed. We planned to grab lunch together and then spend the day sightseeing. Riley said she wanted to ditch the itinerary and just be spontaneous. It was nice seeing her loosen up a bit. I checked my phone in the backseat of the car and frowned when I still had yet to receive a message from Josh. 

Lunch, sightseeing, and straying from the beaten path was actually a nice change. Everyone, including Abby, was civil and seemed to have a nice time just going with the flow. I was glad we could give Riley a positive ending to what was a less than perfect weekend. Unfortunately, I was secretly spiraling on the inside. It was now almost 7:00 p.m. and I still hadn’t heard from Josh. While the day with the girls was fun and much-needed after our falling out, I spent more time trying not to think about him than I spent thinking about anything else. Against my better judgment, I opened my phone and composed a message: “Did you already decide to cut ties with me?” I stared at the text, hesitating if I should send it or not. I didn’t want to text him first, but I was driving myself insane wondering why he hadn’t reached out to me all day. Fuck him for making me feel this way. I started to feel anger towards him which was something I never would have expected. I cleared the message and decided it was best not to text him. If he wanted to, he would. I put my phone away and continued to watch the chick flick that Riley picked out for us to watch together. I listened for the girls’ laughter as a cue for me to laugh as well. I couldn’t focus on the movie because my mind was completely elsewhere. 

Suddenly, I saw my phone light up out of the corner of my eye. I quickly grabbed it to see the name I had been waiting for all day.

Plagiarism: “I have been working and am finally free. I’d like to see you tonight.” I stared at his text wondering how to respond. I couldn’t help but to feel annoyed by the fact that he unexpectedly left me last night and then didn’t reach out all day. He knew how upset I was last night when he left. Then again, he didn’t owe me anything. I had a choice to make: Should I give in and let him come over even though I knew it was going to make it harder to say goodbye? Or should I sever ties early to protect myself? Truthfully, there was no right answer. I would be grieving him either way. 

Me: “I’ll let you know when to head here.”

Plagiarism: “Counting down the seconds…”And just like that, every ounce of anger I had toward him vanished. I turned my attention back to the movie and silently prayed for the credits to start rolling. 

For the last time, I waited patiently by the front door to sneak Josh in now that the girls had gone to bed. As I waited for him, I reminisced about our time together the last few days. I’m not sure I ever believed in fate but I was glad for whatever force of the universe brought us together on that plane. I was thankful for the limited time we had together and would cherish these memories forever. I had finally accepted (or at least I was pretending to accept) that our connection was just temporary. I heard him make his way up the steps and I opened the door to let him in. My heart practically jumped out of my chest now that he was next to me again. Without saying a word, I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug. I inhaled his cologne and felt my lungs expand as I breathed him in. His arms rested around my lower back as we held each other in an embrace. It was as if we were starting our silent goodbye at that moment even though he had just arrived. I didn’t want to let go, nor did he. 

“Let’s go to your room,” he whispered in my ear. I felt goosebumps all over my skin as I finally let go to follow him down the hallway. We entered my bedroom and before I could even lock it, Josh had me pinned against the back of the door. I gasped as his mouth met mine. It was as if he had some sort of animalistic hunger take over him. I moved my hand to lock the door before his mouth started to travel down my neck and to my chest. I felt his hands grip my ass as he pulled me closer to him. I pulled my shirt off and felt one of his hands move up my back to undo my bra. His mouth remained on my chest as he kissed and nipped my breasts. I ran my hands through his hair as he effortlessly pulled my pajama shorts down to where I was standing in front of him completely naked. He buried his face between my thighs and his tongue worked its magic. I felt his firm grip on the back of my thighs as his tongue swirled around my clit. I grabbed handfuls of his hair as my head slammed back against the bedroom door. I moaned his name as my body shuddered in his strong grasp. I felt my body tighten as I fought the urge to scream. I moaned even louder and I swear I felt his mouth switch to a smile while his face stayed between my thighs. My eyes rolled back and my entire body writhed until every cell in my body spasmed because of his tongue. He didn’t stop and I physically felt like I was no longer standing but that he was anchoring me down with his tight grip. I pulled his hair back to try to get him to free me from this intense pleasure, but he continued to suck my clit until I felt another release. “Joshua Michael,” I moaned with what I swore would be my final breath. 

“My forbidden fruit,” I heard him say as he kissed the top of my entrance before standing up. I stayed there in a post-multi-orgasm haze, silently thanking the door for supporting me as I tried not to collapse. Before I knew what was happening, I felt his strong arms lifting my body up and my legs wrapped around his waist. I let out a gasp at the shock of his sudden movement. I looked down to see his large biceps holding me up. Josh carried me to the bed where he gently tossed me on top of the mattress. Biting my lip, I watched him start to undress. He kept his eyes trained on me as he slid the condom over himself. I waited in anticipation for him to make his way to the bed. 

“Come here,” I whispered as I scooted closer to the edge of the bed. He grabbed both of my legs in his arms and pulled me to him in one swift movement. I gasped as he entered me all at once. He was anything but gentle as he allowed that same hunger from earlier to take over as he took me. He pounded me so hard I thought he was going to shatter my pelvis. I wanted to watch his biceps pulse as they held my legs up but I couldn’t keep my eyes from rolling back into my head.

“I’m going to miss this,” he said as he continued to thrust. I grabbed fistfulls of the sheets and pulled them over my face to hide my blushed cheeks.

“I want to see your face. I like to watch you as I fuck you,” he said. I removed the sheets and looked at him as I wrapped my legs around his body and pulled him closer into me which I didn’t think was possible. I arched my back and grinded on him as he rapidly entered in and out of me. I moved my hands up and gripped his biceps as I watched him throw his head back. I moaned his name and I felt him release as he came. Both of us gasped for air like we had been drowning when he collapsed on top of me. The smell of sex, his cologne, and sweat was in the air. 

“Let’s get cleaned up,” he said as I felt him kiss the side of my head. I never wanted to leave this bed. But against my will, I got up to collect my clothes and made my way to the bathroom to wash him off of me.

“I can’t believe I have to set an alarm for 2 a.m.,” Josh said as he held his phone with the clock app open. I snuggled closer next to him and wished time would just stop. 

“Are you up for pulling an all-nighter?” I asked as I kissed his arm. 

“Of course,” he said as he put his phone on the nightstand. We laid there basking in the golden glow from the lamp. I looked up at him and his dark brown eyes were smiling at me, and for a moment, I thought I would get lost in them.

“What did you do today?” I asked.

“We are starting our tour soon, so today was just full of meetings. We had to create a rough draft of a set list and even filmed some promos. It was kind of exhausting and overwhelming honestly,” he said with a soft laugh.

“How long will you be touring?” I questioned.

“We’ll be on the road for six months,” he said.

“Holy shit,” I said. “Are you guys coming to Oklahoma on your tour?”

“Uhhh,” he said nervously. “We’ll only be in Oklahoma for the bourbon meeting next month.”

“Damn, I was hoping I’d be able to score front row tickets,” I said jokingly.

“You can have a front row spot at any or all the shows. You tell me which ones you want to go to and I’ll make it happen,” he said. I couldn’t tell if he was full of shit or not.

“I’ll be out of school for summer soon, so maybe I’ll take you up on that,” I said. My heart fluttered at the idea of not only seeing him again but also being able to watch him perform. 

“Oh, you’re old news, now,” he said with a smirk.

“Huh?” I asked as my eyebrows furrowed.

“Nobody is talking about Sam and Danny’s TikTok performance anymore according to our social media team. They posted some cryptic promos online to get the platforms talking about our upcoming tour instead,” he said with a wink.

“Ah, man. I was hoping you’d be my claim to fame,” I said with a sigh.

“Sorry, your 15 seconds are over,” he said, shrugging his shoulders. 

“Will you let me know when you’re in Oklahoma next month?” I asked. I watched his eyes scan the room as if they were searching for an answer that seemed to elude him.

“Strawberry, I already told you that I don’t want to intrude on your personal life,” he said as if he were annoyed that I brought up the burning question again.  

“You wouldn’t be,” I said. “You say I could have front row tickets to all of your shows but you don’t want to see me when you’re in my home state? It’s confusing.”

“It’s just—” he began.

“I’m leaving him when I get home,” I admitted for the first time. I was even surprised that I said my thoughts aloud.

“Strawberry…” he said with a sigh. 

“No, it’s not because of you. Well, that’s not totally true. It is because of you. You have inspired me to stop living my life in a dormant state. I finally feel like I have something worth living for. I have a pulse, I have a mind, I have a heart, and I am free to use them however I see fit. It’s like you’ve awakened me in some way, Josh. And I know I sound crazy, but it’s true,” I said. I felt like I had just screamed the words off the pages of my figurative diary. I suddenly felt embarrassed by my bold confessions. Without saying a word, Josh tilted my chin up with his hand and I stared into his eyes.

“It’s important that you live your life the way you want without fear. I’m just happy to have been a small part of your new beginning,” he said as he gently kissed me. For the rest of the night and into the early morning of the new day, we held each other for hours, had deep conversations, and enjoyed the time left before his alarm went off. For the rest of my life, I would curse the sound of that alarm. I felt my soul split into two as I kissed him goodbye one last time. 

Chapter Seventeen

I had only been gone for four nights, but I felt like I was stepping into unfamiliar territory when I got home. I had a little under six hours before Kenneth would be home from work which I was grateful for because I was trying to decide how and when to call off our engagement. I walked through my front door and was nearly tackled by Sassy. I missed my girl so much I wanted to cry as I got down on the floor to cuddle with her. I buried my face into her fur and wrapped my arms around her. I stayed with her on the floor until her zoomies wore off. I got up to drag my luggage to the bedroom where I could start to unpack. I unzipped the suitcase and started to throw my dirty clothes into the laundry basket. I didn’t get far into the task when my phone started to ring. I glanced at the screen and noticed Kenneth’s name.

“Hey,” I said as I balanced the phone between my ear and shoulder.

“Hey, are you home?” He asked.

“Yes, I just walked in,” I said.

“Did you have a good time?” He asked.

“Yeah for the most part,” I said as I continued to sort my laundry.

“Did you make any new friends?” He asked. 

“Um, Maddie and Brooke seemed cool but that was about it,” I said.

“You didn’t hang out with anyone else?” He asked. Ok, he was definitely fishing for something. 

“Uh, we met some people when we were out one night and they came over to play drinking games,” I said nonchalantly.

“People as in…?” He asked.

“Is there something you want to ask me, Kenneth?” I asked.

“We can talk about it when I get home. I’m going to leave the office early, so I’ll be home in a couple hours,” he said. I could sense he was angry. Maybe the tough conversation was going to come earlier than I planned for it to. Maybe I shouldn’t start unpacking in case I need to leave again. 

“Ok, well, I’ll be here,” I said trying to sound calm as we hung up the phone. I could feel my anxiety start to get out of hand so I took a seat on the bed to focus on my breathing. Sassy nudged her face against my legs, and I was grateful to have my loyal companion back. I reached down to pet her as I continued to take calculated breaths. I knew that no matter what happened after Kenneth got home, I would always have Sassy by my side. 

I was folding my now clean clothes from the dryer when I heard Kenneth’s truck pull up in our driveway. I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the impending interrogation. I was guilty. I knew that. But I had already served a sentence being trapped in this relationship and I was ready for liberation, no matter how painful it would be. I continued to fold my laundry when I saw him standing in the doorway to the laundry room.

“Hi,” I said in a quick breath.

“Hey,” he said. “Are you happy to be home?” 

“Uh, kind of, yeah,” I said, continuing to fold my clothes.

He crossed his arms and said, “Yeah, I guess partying with rock stars isn’t as fun as life back in Oklahoma, huh?” 

“Rock stars?” I asked.

“Cut the shit,” he said. “Our PR team recognized you immediately. I had that TikTok emailed to me four times in one day.”

“We met the band in Nashville and invited them over to hangout. It wasn’t a big deal,” I said.

“Oh, well, you and Josh looked pretty cozy,” Kenneth said. My heart strings pulled at the mere mention of his name. 

“How come you didn’t tell me y’all were in business with Greta Van Fleet?” I asked not only trying to change the subject but also because I was genuinely curious.

“I’ve never concerned you with details about work. I wouldn’t have thought you knew who they were anyways. I guess I was wrong about that,” he said as he began to take off his dress shoes. He carried them off into the bedroom and I smoothed over the piles of folded clothes when I heard him charging back down the hallway.

“What the fuck is this?” Kenneth yelled as I looked at the small, white rectangle in his hands. And as if all of the oxygen in the room suddenly disappeared, I felt like I stopped breathing. I stared at the card from Josh from the bouquet of white roses he had sent to me the day after we met. The card I tucked away into my suitcase to keep Riley from knowing the delivered flowers weren’t for her. It must have fallen out when I was unpacking. 

Kenneth read the card aloud as if I didn’t know what it already said, “Thinking of you, -J. Are you fucking kidding me? That’s it. We’re not partnering with them anymore. I’m pulling the plug on that deal tomorrow morning,” Kenneth said with a scoff.

“Why would you do that? They love your bourbon!” I exclaimed.

“I’m not going to be made into a damn fool,” he said as he stormed off to our bedroom. I stayed put in the laundry room trying to collect my thoughts. I wanted to call Josh but I knew now would be the literal worst time to do that. I followed him into the bedroom as I felt myself preparing for battle. 

“Don’t ruin this business opportunity because of me, please,” I said.

“Thinking of you… Of YOU?” He stressed. “Why would a celebrity give a fuck about you?” He asked with a mocking laugh. I bit my tongue because I knew he was just trying to hurt my feelings. My silence angered him even more. “This explains why you fell off the face of the earth during your trip. You didn’t give a shit about me. You were too busy fucking a guy who wears rhinestones and glitter!” He yelled. I watched his eyes fall to my left hand. “Where’s your engagement ring?” I looked down at my hand and realized I never put it on today. In fact, I can’t remember the last time I did wear it or where I even put it.

“I’m not wearing any jewelry,” I said as I attempted to cover my tracks. “But we do need to talk.”

I spent the following weeks simply going through the motions. I returned back to work but lived my life in a complete daze. I was in autopilot mode and moved like a machine, constant and without breaks. I convinced Kenneth to keep the partnership with the band. It wasn’t easy to do but I was happy he finally agreed not to cancel. He says it was because he wouldn’t want to pay them since he’d be breaking the contract, but no matter the reason, I was grateful. If anything, it kept the small dream of Josh coming back to Oklahoma alive. 

As far as our engagement went, those ties were severed. And honestly, it was the first step I needed to take toward my new life. I was a few weeks away from summer vacation, so I had been slowly packing up my things. Kenneth so kindly allowed me the grace of getting to stay in his home until I had time to look for someplace new. As if everything were back to normal, Kenneth and I continued to coexist except for the fact that Sassy and I now slept in the guest bedroom. We continued to live our lives as roommates but this time, we didn’t communicate at all. Unfortunately, the same went for Josh and I… I hadn’t heard from him since we said our heartbreaking goodbye in Nashville. No phone call. No text. Nothing. I knew it would be like this but I just didn’t think it would still hurt weeks later. I was back to my lonely life with only Riley’s FaceTime dates to keep me sane until summer. I didn’t really have a plan but I figured I would take everything day by day. I had enough in my savings account that I would be able to support myself on my own. And as much as I didn’t want to ask, I knew my parents would be willing to help if I needed anything. Riley said the same thing which floored me; she shouldn’t be worried about taking care of her grown ass best friend while she was busy planning a wedding in a different state. That was one thing I was grateful for: Riley had me stay busy with wedding planning since she was living 738 miles away from the venue. I finally felt as if I were being the maid of honor I should have been all along, but I was grateful for any task she gave me that kept me from thinking about him.

Chapter Eighteen 

One month later

“We ain’t angry at you, love. You’re the greatest thing we’ve lost,” I sang along to my music as I packed a tote bag with my personal items. I had to be at the venue in 30 minutes for my hair and makeup appointment, but that was no big deal since my new apartment was less than 15 minutes away. Today was Riley’s big day and I was so excited to see everything we’ve been planning come to life. Kenneth agreed to watch Sassy at his house for the night since I wouldn’t be home from the wedding until after midnight. Although our relationship had been over for quite some time, we still remained civil which was best case scenario given the circumstances. Even if we didn’t originally end on the best terms once I told him the truth about Nashville, we had spent over a decade being a part of each other’s lives. We weren’t friends nor did we talk, but it was comforting to know that we weren’t enemies. Truth be told, Kenneth admitted he was unhappy in our relationship too. This separation was what we both needed.

I didn’t mind attending the wedding without a date; I knew I would be too busy making sure everything was perfect to entertain anyone all night anyways. I grabbed my maid of honor dress, a navy backless maxi dress with a plunging bodice, and hung it up in my backseat. I was so thankful Riley chose a dress that was not only stylish and sexy, but also one that I could wear again after today. I went back inside to grab my phone, wallet, keys, and tote bag. I got in my car and continued the song that had been on loop for the past month for my quick drive. “And we’ll all be here forever,” I sang loudly to an audience of none as I turned into the venue parking lot. The wedding was set to start in a couple hours. I was the last of the bridesmaids to get her hair and makeup done since Maddie, Brooke, and Abby actually had to travel to be here. I collected my things from my car and took a deep breath before I made my way to the bridal suite. 

Standing next to Riley as she said her vows, I tried everything in my power to hold back tears. I felt so genuinely happy for her at this moment that I was overcome with emotions. She pledged her love and commitment to Mike who stared back at her with such adoration. I don’t think anyone in this room had a dry eye. I was honored to both witness and be a part of the most important person in my life’s happiest day. After their kiss, I handed her bridal bouquet back to her and cheered loudly as they made their way down the aisle. I looped arms with the best man and followed Riley and Mike down the aisle to head to the reception hall. As we passed by the hundreds of smiling guests clapping in their seats, I locked eyes with a face that caused me to stumble. Quickly, the best man grabbed my arm and caught me before I fell flat on my face. No way. There is absolutely no way. I felt my cheeks blush from the embarrassment as I regained my footing.

“Thank you,” I said to the best man who still kept a hold on me in case I took another spill. I looked back toward the guest who caused me to trip, but I didn’t see him. It was all in my head. I shook the nerves off and entered the reception area to mingle with the guests while Riley and Mike took photos. But first, I made my way to the bar. If I was going to get on the dancefloor later like Riley had commanded, I needed some liquid courage. 

“One glass of chardonnay, please,” I said to the bartender. I figured I’d be the first guest to take advantage of the open bar. I watched the bartender grab a corkscrew to open the bottle of white wine when I smelled a familiar scent of cologne.  

“Make that two glasses, please,” I heard his voice say.

“Yes, sir,” the bartender nodded to the person standing beside me. I felt like I was frozen and couldn’t move. 

“I don’t think you’ve ever looked more stunning than you do right now,” I heard him whisper into my ear. I turned to see if my imagination was playing a trick on me; alas, there stood Josh in a perfectly tailored suit. I was speechless, afraid that I had fallen asleep in the makeup chair and would soon wake up from this dream. 

“Thank you,” Josh said to the bartender as he grabbed both glasses of wine. He reached out for me to take the second glass but I still stood there as if I were paralyzed. 

“What are you doing here?” I asked once I finally found my voice. 

“Riley invited me, so I wanted to surprise you,” he said, flashing that heart-stopping smile of his. 

“What? How did Riley even know how to get a hold of you?” I asked.

“She said she kept my number from when you sent it to her before I came over for the first time. Remember when she had to run my background check?” He said with a laugh. 

“I can’t believe this,” I said, shaking my head. There was no way that this was really happening.

“Come on,” Josh said as he stuck out his arm for me to grab since both of his hands carried our glasses of wine. I looped my arm through his and allowed him to escort me to a table. He pulled my chair out for me and I sat as the millions of questions flooded my brain. He took the seat next to mine and grabbed his glass of wine. 

“To Riley and…” He began but clearly forgot the groom’s name.

“Mike,” I said with a laugh as I touched his glass to mine. 

“Yes, Mike, I knew that,” he said as he took a sip. Liar.

“How long have you been planning this?” I asked.

“Riley reached out to me two weeks ago, and since our bourbon meeting is on Monday, I decided to stay in Oklahoma for the weekend. I flew in this morning,” he said with a wink. “And you can’t get mad at me for not telling you that I was in town because Riley wanted it to be a surprise.”

“Well, this is going to be awkward when my date gets here,” I said. Josh stared at me with a look in his eyes like he had just seen a ghost. He cleared his throat and shifted in his seat. 

“I’m kidding!” I finally said after watching him sweat a little. 

“That wasn’t funny,” he said as he finished his glass of wine.

“How have you been?” I asked.

“I’ve been good, I’ve been good. We’ve just been preparing for the launch of our new partnership and also the tour. I’m actually excited to have this weekend off,” he said.

“Where are you staying while you’re here?” I asked.

“Wherever you are,” he said with a wink. I felt my skin getting warm.

“Bold of you to assume I’d let you stay with me,” I said while taking a sip of my wine. 

“I’ll beg if I have to,” Josh said as he stood up. He grabbed his empty wine glass and leaned down to whisper in my ear before heading back to the bar. “You know you’ve had me on my knees before.” My jaw was practically on the floor. 

When Riley and Mike made their grand entrance into the reception hall, she gave me a wink when she saw Josh and I sitting together. I subtly flipped her off which made her laugh before Mike pulled her into a kiss. I was sipping on my second glass of wine, so I knew I needed to take it easy since my maid of honor speech was coming up. After the stunt she pulled, I really wanted to add that Riley was a sneaky bitch into the speech I had prepared, but I decided against it. 

“I love weddings,” Josh said with a sigh as he glanced around the room.

“Aren’t you against the idea of marriage?” I asked, raising my eyebrow.

“That’s a harsh way of putting it, but essentially, yes. That doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy weddings,” he said with a soft smile. “Weddings are a celebration of love and happiness. For some, it’s the best day of their lives. And to be a witness to that, it’s moving.”

“I know what you mean. Did you see me crying during Riley’s vows?” I asked, biting my lip.

“Strawberry, I watched you the entire time,” he said. I rolled my eyes and laughed at his ridiculous statement. “You don’t believe me?” He added.

“Why would you stare at a bridesmaid the whole time during a wedding ceremony?” I asked.

“Have you seen you in that dress?” Josh asked, giving me a wink and nudging my knee with his. He began to laugh and said, “I also saw you almost fall down the aisle once you realized I was there.” 

“Yeah, thanks for that,” I said playfully, hitting his arm. He grabbed my hand before I pulled away and held it.

“It’s really good to see you again,” he said. “You look happier than ever.”

“Thank you, I am,” I said, giving him a genuine smile. I stared into his brown eyes that I swore held me captive. 

After Riley and Mike’s exit, I headed back inside to grab my belongings from the bridal suite. It was the most magical evening full of laughter, love, and light. My maid of honor speech was a hit and I even got out on the dance floor more than once. Truth be told, I didn’t need the wine after all. I was running off the fumes of simply being around Riley and Josh, the two people who bring out the best in me. 

“So…” Josh said, shuffling his feet. “Would you like to come back with me to my hotel?” I hesitated because I knew the pain and longing I felt after our last goodbye. I wasn’t sure I wanted to go through that again. Even now, the grief I felt because of our fleeting time together still hit me in waves. I honestly can’t even listen to Greta Van Fleet’s music because it was too painful hearing his voice. 

“I would love to spend more time with you, but I don’t want to be hurt again,” I admitted.

“Conversation only, I promise,” Josh said, holding up his right hand as if he were taking an oath in court.

“Yeah, yeah, we all know how that goes,” I said, shifting my weight to my other foot. My heels were killing my feet and I wanted nothing more than to take them off. 

“I will not put you in an uncomfortable situation. I’ll stay five feet apart from you in the room at all times. Six feet even. Hell, I’ll book the room across from mine and we can talk on the hotel phone if you don’t want to be around me,” he said.

“Oh, so you remember how to use a phone?” I asked as I felt my cheeks get hot with my bold comment. He sighed and looked down at the tile floor.

Without making eye contact, he said softly, “I’ve been hurting too, ya know?” I moved closer to him so that he would look into my eyes.

“Let me run back to my apartment to grab some things I need and to change out of these fucking shoes. Text me your hotel information, and I’ll be there,” I said looking into his eyes. 

“Can you at least stay in that dress?” He asked while biting his lip.

Looking and feeling like an idiot wearing a formal gown with Chaco sandals, I entered the elevator in Josh’s hotel lobby. I had my overnight bag slung over my shoulder with comfortable pajamas stashed inside, but I decided to stay in my dress a little longer per his request. I hit the button and felt the butterflies in my stomach move as I made my way up to the highest floor. I found his room and knocked lightly on the door. He opened the door and I immediately crossed my arms when I saw that he had changed out of his suit.

“Ok, not fair that I was asked to stay in my formal attire, but you get to wear comfortable clothes,” I said, narrowing my eyes.

“You never asked me to stay in my suit,” he said. He looked down at my feet. “Your feet seem to be more comfortable, though.” I rolled my eyes and made my way into his hotel room. I placed my bag on the desk near the door and noticed a tray of chocolate covered strawberries and a bottle of wine on the table. 

“Cute,” I said as I pointed to the tray.

“I was feeling nostalgic,” he said grinning.

I finally convinced Josh that he had seen me in my dress long enough, so I made my way into the bathroom to change into my pajamas. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen me completely naked on more than one occasion, but I still wanted to keep my guard up. I exited the bathroom and grabbed the tray of strawberries before climbing into his bed. He opened the bottle of wine and poured two glasses. He made his way over to join me. 

“So will you fly back to Nashville after your meeting on Monday?” I asked as I accepted the glass he poured for me.

“Yes, that evening we will head back,” he said as he began to remove the plastic wrap off of the tray of strawberries.

“We?” I asked.

“Well, the guys are flying in Monday morning for a quick trip. I obviously got here early,” he said, biting into a chocolate covered strawberry. 

“So, I actually have a funny story about the bourbon company,” I said as I took a sip of my wine.

“Oh, that you are engaged to the head of the company?” He asked as he raised his eyebrow.

“First, were. Past tense. Second, you knew?” I asked with my mouth agape. 

“Yeah, that was a fun conversation between our PR teams. Another reason I never reached out to you, by the way,” he said as he finished his strawberry.

“Kenneth almost pulled the whole deal, but I convinced him to keep it,” I said nervously.

“It all made sense after you and Riley reacted so strangely when I pulled out the bottle,” he said laughing. “I guess we both had secrets.”

“Well, I don’t have any more secrets up my sleeve. And I don’t need to know about any of yours that have happened after me,” I said as I began searching the tray for the perfect strawberry. He grabbed my hand before I could pick the one that caught my eye.

“There hasn’t been anyone after you,” he said quietly as he held my hand. I looked up to meet his gaze as it burned through me. I looked down at our hands as they rested on top of the tray of strawberries. You can’t. You can’t do this again.

“I promise that I was going to call you when I came back to Oklahoma for the meeting. I had every intention to reach out to you before Riley invited me to her wedding,” he said softly. I still stared at our hands because I was afraid to look into his eyes again. He removed the glass of wine from my hand and placed it on the bedside table. He took both of my hands into his and moved his head to where he was in my line of vision.

“Our tour starts at the end of next month, and I have little to no free time between now and then, but I want to make you another promise,” he said. I closed my eyes as I braced myself for what he was about to say next. “Every moment that I have even half of a day to spare, I will be coming to you or flying you to me,” he said. “I haven’t stopped thinking about you since the first moment I saw you in the airport.” I laughed as I felt the tears forming behind my eyelids.

“And I know what hurt you’re talking about because I have felt it too. Every Goddamn day since I left your Airbnb,” he said with a crack in his voice. I opened my teary eyes to see that his eyes matched mine. “So, if you are up for some traveling this summer, I would love for you–” but before he could finish his sentence, I shut him up with a kiss. Our first kiss since we said goodbye in Nashville. He pushed the tray of strawberries to the floor and pulled me closer to him on the bed. His hands held my face as my tongue parted his lips and we breathed each other in. The electricity I felt the moment we touched for the first time on the plane was still between us. It never left, and it never would.

The End 

#greta van fic #josh kiszka #josh kiskza fanfic #greta van fleet #joshua michael kiszka #greta van fleet smut #greta van smut #gvf series

[buckleysbegins]

My thought on Buddie and on Queer people (but especially men) in 9-1-1:

I go back and forth on whether or not I think Buddie will actually become cannon. If we look back on Buck’s actions in the first season (Buck 1.0) we see a "hyper-sexual", young, millenial character who is characterized as ‘bad’ and as needing to change. If the show was targeted to younger millenials and older gen z, then Buck’s actions would not have been seen as a bad thing becasue these generations of people have reclaimed the idea of sexuality and of having as much concensual sex as they want, as long as its being done safely. But, becasue the show was watched and targeted to older people (older Gen X and Boomers) who are definetley more sexually repressed and not as open with themselves, Buck’s character was seen as young and dumb. Yes, he was naive and young and it was not a good idea to steal the firetruck to have sex in the middle of the work day. But, I would argue that he was not, in fact, dumb. Having Bobby be a savior/father character to Buck’s ‘bad’ decisions just pushed, and continues to push, the idea that Buck is a hyper-emotional character who cannot make good decisions (pushing himself to get back to work, hook-up culture, the lawsuit- which I do not think was a bad idea, to be honest. Bobby was in the wrong, he couldn't let his personal feelings go).

Saying all that, how are bisexual characters ALWAYS characterized? As being hyper-sexual (Buck). As not being able to hold down a relationship (Buck). As being straight until, hey, you know what? I think I might be gay (possibly Buck’s future??) And look, Ryan Murphy has never written a bisexual character who remained bisexual. His characters are always straight until they’re gay or say they are bisexual once and then decided that they are ‘fully’ gay later on. Ryan Murphy is another problem all together, though. I really dislike that man. Back to Buck, he fits the characterization of a bisexual character without coming out as bisexual. Is this on purpose? Do the writers/producers whant queer people to be able to tell that Buck is bisexual? IS this just another instance of the sad bi boy who won’t come out until he is in a relationship?

We know that if the show was for younger people, Buck would have had a relationship with a man by now. Maddie hinted at it when she mentioned Buck’s crush on Eddie and again when she was stealthily setting Josh and Buck. Queer people and ally’s can see it but are basically being gaslighted and queerbaited along the way. And lets not even get started on Hen’s decisions in season 1 (another queer person who makes bad decisions and who is too emotional as the only woman on the team??)

I personally do not see Eddie and Buck getting together (hopefully I’m wrong). I don’t think Ryan Murphy is brave enough. (I’m just going to say it) Lone star isnt nearly as good of a show as 9-1-1. The acting isnt as good (both the main cast and the extras), the inter-personal relationships of the main cast isnt as strong. We were given that show as a cop out. "Oh, you want queer people? You want queer men? OK! Here’s a new show!”

i’m gonna preface this by saying that i’m by no means an expert in queer representation in media and my experience with bisexual representation in media in particular is limited (just because most shows i’ve watched don’t feature bisexuality in either a positive or negative light). i’m also not a buddie shipper so that isn’t something that i’m actively hoping to happen, so i probably don’t feel as strongly about this as you, as well as a lot of the fandom, apparently do.

i personally feel like at this point in the show it would be fairly easy to create a positive bisexual representation on the show. like yes, buck made stupid decisions in season 1 (as did literally all of the characters) and the representation of his more open sexuality could’ve been better (cause on one hand while stealing a firetruck to get laid is objectively stupid and reckless, but they could’ve also worked in open sexuality that wasn’t stupid sexuality), but he’s grown a lot since then and i think the understanding of his character has changed a lot and those tendencies don’t feel as relevant to his character anymore (i also don’t necessarily agree with any of the overall characteristics that you’ve pointed out, since part of the show is that a lot of those no longer really apply). it would be one thing if they regressed buck into that sort of culture, but also given that him looking for something serious is a main storyline for him now, i don’t think him considering dating a man/men in general would automatically be a stereotyped representation. i know it can be difficult because some people will automatically apply a character’s tendencies to the character’s sexuality, but i also really do think that there are a lot of ways to do it without playing into stereotypes.

i also personally strongly disagree with the idea that the show is queerbaiting/gaslighting viewers by “teasing” buddie and that lone star is the “gay version” of the original 911 or something. firstly, i do note that you barely mentioned any of the canonically queer characters, with one of them being to show how a gay man was being used to “tease” a bisexual buck and the other to cite hen as a negative example of queer representation (though i also did really dislike that storyline), and made no mention of michael (whose own coming out was a starting point of the show), nor of hen and michael’s ongoing steady relationships, nor of josh existing beyond that one line regarding buck, and whenever i see stuff like this i feel like people are glossing over (either intentionally or unintentionally) those characters and relationships to fit their narrative. i also don’t think that they’re dangling buddie as a means to get viewers, as i personally don’t see as much there (either explicitly or subtextually) as a lot of other people on here do (plus the show did as well in season 1 when eddie didn’t exist as it’s done since he was introduced, so they’re not really getting some boost from it). as for lone star, since i don’t actually watch the show so i don’t know how they actually treat their queer characters and relationships and what representation is featured by side characters, but from what i’ve heard it’s not like it’s “more,” it’s just different. i know that the show features a trans character and that one of the main romantic relationships is between two gay main characters (and both of those are great!) but the only real difference i can see between the original show and lone star is that the gay characters are both the “hot shippable” type that a lot of fandom tends to go for (because like with the original it looks like most of the content is for that relationship and not the trans character/other representation).

i don’t know if buck’s (or eddie’s) sexualities will ever be explored and if that’s a route they’ll decide to go down, and that they’ll actually handle it in a kind way if they do, but i think there’s definitely more than enough opportunity for them to do so if they do. i don’t want to give the showrunners credit for something they haven’t done, but i’m also not going to knock them for it yet.

#answered #anonymous

[reachgirl]

Ok thoughts on 9-1-1 3x14 “The Taking of Dispatch 911″

- I’ll admit I really couldn’t come up with a good reason why anyone would take a 911 dispatch hostage but that was SO clever

- Buck in casual clothes. That is all.

- YES CHIM, YES

- he highkey called 911 because his girlfriend told him she loved him and then didn’t answer the phone, I ASPIRE TO BE THIS LEVEL OF DRAMATIC

- Madney invented healthy love you can’t convince me otherwise 

- So much growth for Buck like, no impulsive running into the dispatch and risking his own life, we did not give our man enough credit

- “YEP go for Buck”

- Buck was so sure Maddie could handle herself, I just feel like I really need the backstory of their childhood ok, I need to know what gave them both such low self esteem that Buck literally says about himself he is nothing if he’s not a firefighter and Maddie got married so young and didn’t feel like she could stand up for herself, and neither of them knows pop culture references I just love how they’ve both grown but I need to know more!!

- Maddie is just so gorgeous I can’t, that color on her 😍

- Athena is queen but also I still don’t understand what her actual job is, like she doesn’t have a partner (don’t you have to have one?) and she just drives around doing her own thing? How did she get this job?

- The ladies of dispatch 911 are badass

- No Eddie, and no Eddie supporting Buck, which is not ok and I won’t pretend that it is, but I guess since we’re getting Eddie Begins next episode I will let it slide this once

- Buck had Josh’s number 🤔😏Don’t get me wrong I don’t necessarily *want* that to happen but Josh needs a friend and Buck needs a friend and if it serves to give us the bi!buck revelation on top of that? I’m here for it

- Idk man I don’t have high hopes we’ll get much “more” Buddie content this season but I hope I’m wrong

- Apparently Tiffany and the bad guy that assaulted Josh will be in 3x16 like how? How does that work? 

- Can we talk about how he really didn’t need to ASSAULT josh in order to copy the card? Like that just means he might go to the police and he knows what he looks like so that’s an extra risk for them? There are a million other ways he could have gotten a copy of that card without scarring him for life and giving him trauma? 

- I know that was supposed to be a nice moment and I CRIED when Maddie collapsed in Chim’s arms but it made me so sad to see Buck saying that his sister has everything she needs without him? Like, I get the focus is on Madney but Bucky, honey, Maddie and Chim and Eddie and Chris and everyone do need you also! :( 

- Lonely Buck is my least favorite Buck so I hope it’s not setting it up so Abby can be that missing piece..

- stop hurting Maddie 2k20

- stop hurting Josh 2k20

- I could NOT have come up with all these super clever ways to tell the outside people that something is up, so proud of maddie/the other lady/josh

- I really like these heist style episodes, I also really liked the bank robbery last time. I’m a sucker for the end reveal!!

- I love seeing Maddie, Chimney, Buck & Josh hang out

- I need more Albert plot :/

- I wanted Tiffany to succeed, arrest me

#buddie #maddie buckley #911 314 #911 3x14 #911 season 3 #eddie diaz #evan buckley #chimney han #athena grant #bobby nash #josh russo #the taking of dispatch 911

[bibibuckleyy]

my thoughts on ‘The taking of Dispach 9-1-1′

this was SUCH a good episode from start to finish! *pulls out a slide show* Now i’ll show you breaking down every. single. scene-

jk lmao...unless?

spoilers below the cut!

lord. have. mercy.

these hoes are givin me major heist vibes

tiffany bby ur the driver but for me to acknowledge you as such you better be Letty Ortiz good hun

wow these thugs are a lot my organized than i first thought like i know they was carryin guns but i aint know they was packin this much like damn

Oceans 8 who?

so i wanna know where they just...got a cop car???

OH HELL NAH Y’ALL BEST NOT MESS WITH TERRY

I MEAN ANA MAY BE HIS SISTER

AND  SHE MAY BE MAKIN MOVES ON EDDIE 

BUT IN THIS HOUSE WE LOVE TERRY FLORES SO YOU GET YOUR GUN AWAY FROM SUNSHINE BBY

it’s kinda funny rewatching this scene when you know what’s about to go down

like i’m cacklin like ‘oh shooooot dramaaaa’

but i’m also like ‘SOMEONE GRAB JOSH AND RUN’

“temporary maintenance, happens all the time” cool cool cool 

i’m not freakin out you’re freakin out

josh and maddie are like friend goals i love their dynamic like yoooo

hi yes could you please get that gun away from terry’s head i would really appreciate it.

OMG SECURITY DUDE NOOOO

wow ur like the only line of defense in the dispatch center and they just kicked ur ass

is this where our tax dollars are goin??

fly high josh’s mug, fly high

that absolute look of fear on his face tho, still breaks my heart

josh russo defense squad post up homies

“i love you, howie” nope nope nope didn’t like it the second time either

when that gun went off

LET ME TELL YOU

i just,,,waited for the blood to start comin out of terry

thank god it wasn’t him

good scene lmaooo 9-1-1 writers i hate you all lmao lmao

“bees are the least of your troubles here, sweetheart” I HATE YOU DUDE

someone call mama grant please

“we’ve got dispatch” i do not like this ma’am i’d like to speak to the manager

“you’ll shoot us” man shut the hell up-

“no, we’ll shoot the person next you you” this dude is insane

lookin like mr.clean’s evil cousin LMAOOOOO

“you only do something like this so you can do something...worse”

um whAT-

“you’re being paranoid, she’s fine” CHIMNEY NO NO NO

i don’t think i’ve ever thrown this much popcorn at my tv in my life

as chimney said “don’t do it man” just picture a 5′5 lightskinned girl tripping over her blanket while yelling “DO IT CHIM, DO IT!” and you’ll have me

“sorry, we are experiencing a high call volume” BITCH MORE LIKE A HIGH CRIME VOLUME SOMEBODY GET MAMA GRANT DAMNIT-

*screams* BUUUUUUUUCK 

HI BBY

ooh nice shirt, i guess pink isn’t the only color that suits ya

he looks good in all the colors

whole damn snaaaaack

not to be an idiot on main but seriously, who watches the watchmen?

“i miss like an earthquake or something?” lmao chim is a whole vibe

“wait....why are you calling 9-1-1, is everything ok?” paired with that cute adorable concerned face he made is making me cry ok we don’t deserve buck T-T

“she’s at the call center, what could happen?” AT LOT ACTUALLY

OH THANK YOU JESUS IT’S ATHENA FUCKIN FINALLY 

*cries* mama grant you won’t believe the day i’ve had

“he’s my husband” LMAOOOOO WHAT

whoa tiffany we’ve already had our fair share of mail bombs here that bet’ not be what i think it is

THE PACKAGE IS VIBRATING AND BLINKING TAKE COVER-

ohhhhhhhhhh

it’s just takin out the security systems lmao 

“technical difficulties” BITCH MORE  LIKE CRIMINAL DIFFICULTIES

“i bet this woman really thinks you’re...worthwhile.” JOSH BBY DON’T LISTEN TO A WORD HE SAYS EVERYONE LOVES YOU

ahaha thanks i did not need those flashbacks it hurt enough the first time 

“a woman called about an omelet, i dispatched an officer”

“to the restaurant?”

“not exactly”

???

“i tried calling josh, but no answer” aww josh and buck are friendssssss :)

JOSH HAS BEEN ADOPTED BY THE FIREFAM PASS IT ON

:0

JOSH YOU GENIUS

YOU SMART SMART CINNAMON ROLL

MAMA GRANT IT’S TIME TO MAKE SOME MOVES

“nO NO CHIMNEY DON’T HANG UP!” i shouldn’t have laughed so hard

oh great he’s hastily grabbing his jacket. he’s about to do something rash and irresponsible

....someone call eddie.

that’s some good heist music right there

the bad guys look stressed....good.

“you’re here so i can keep an eye on you and make sure you don’t do anything foolish” BUT YOU LEFT BUCK

OK BUCK I LOVE YOU BBY

BUT YOU HAVE THIS HABIT OF TURNIN INTO SPECIAL AGENT 007 REAL FAST WHEN YOUR FRIENDS ARE IN TROUBLE MAN

LIKE

HE’S THE ‘EVERYONE BEFORE ME’ MEMBER OF THE FIREFAM

mama grant i ain’t questionin your authority or nun but like???

WHY WOULD YOU NOT KEEP AN EYE ON BUCK TOO?

HE’S THE MOST LIKELY CANDIDATE TO DO SOMETHIN STUPID

thats some reckless drivin there buckaroo

buck who were you tryna fool tho

athena only knows one golden retriever dude in this city who drives a grey and black jeep

“ok now, don’t be mad” LMAOOOOOOOO

HANDS DOWN ONE OF MY FAVE SCENES

HE KNEW HIS MOM WAS PISSED TOO LMAOOOO

athena’s look is sending meeeeee 😂😂

omg my god😭😂

“hey buck”

“...hey chim”

athena has some dumbass kids yo

the best part is, she knows it

the way mr. clean broke his neck when dude said ‘police cruiser’ LMAOOOO

“and if it’s not normal?”

“we’ll find out”

*blasts boss bitch*

i love the way buck is kinda concerned for his mom tho

and athena’s just like ‘it’s no sweat sweetie i do this every day’

“shoot her”

BITCH I HOPE THE FUCK YOU DO

YOU’LL BE A DEAD SON OF A BITCH

I’LL TELL YOU THAT

“shoot her, now”

try her bitch, see what happens to yo ass. 

the 118

the call center

the entire fandom 

we will collectively end you

“we got a report of a code 77″

THANK GOD THAT GOT ATHENA OUT OF THERE

what is a code 77 you say?

“ambush, proceed with caution”

well it sure nuff aint indecent exposure

*boss bitch keeps playing cause that was super smart for her to give out a code 77*

“maddie is smart, she can take care of herself until help gets there”

HELL YEA SHE CAN

SHE KICKED DOUG’S ASS SHE’LL KICK YOURS TOO

“they’re not gonna wanna leave behind a room full of witnesses”

i’m-i’m fine, i swear-

“killing people, your solution to every problem”

excuse me? do i hear morals??

they’re really fighting each other

they some grade a stupid right there 

there’s no way they are pullin this off

terry

terry what are you doing

TERRY

RUN TERRY RUN GO GO GO

OH SHIT

JOSHHHHHHHH

i thought they were gonna shoot terry

BUT JOSH CAME THROUGH IN THE CLUTCH

wowwwwww dispatch is a lot more badass than i thought

these dudes are hard core

OH

OH JOSH NO BBY

THAT LOOKS LIKE IT HURT

aii square tf up mr. clean we don’t hit josh here and you gon have to pay for that one

the way everyone is just quietly sobbing tho

it saddens me

“I need another thirty minutes”

i’m really enjoying watching this dude’s plan crumble around him

swat posted up aii i see yall

“we’ll try to get eyes in a damn windowless room”

well when you put it that way it sounds like this is hopeless

“i’m sorry i thought you were crazy”

“i’m sorry i wasn’t”

wow i don’t think i was supposed to laugh at that

and chim bein concerned for maddie is literally one if the best things ever y’all.

completely unrelated note, anybody else see bad boys for life?

“yeah i’m ok, my ears are just ringing a little” with the TEARS and the SNIFFLES and him SMILING THROUGH THE PAIN JOSH IS TOO PURE FOR THIS 

“why do you think we asked for so many RA units?” BITCH I KNOW YOU FUCKIN LYIN

for those of y’all that ain’t kno, RA units are rescue ambulance units

way to reassure people, lady

it’s like she said ‘everyone might be lightly shot by the time this is all over’

“so you are worried. it makes sense, cause all your friends keep dissappearing are they even in the same building?” WITH THAT LOOK OF STRAIGHT SPITE DAMN MADDIE BUCKLEY, DAMNNN

we stan the BAMF BUCKLEYS

“oh my god, LINDA??” lo key thought this was real for a second

“latex! is there latex in your gloves?” greg come on man you planned a heist you can’t be this stupid

SURPRISE! LINDA IS ALLERGIC TO BEES

ENJOY YOUR EPINEPHRINE ASSHOLE

OH

OH WOW

WOW DISPATCH

Y’ALL JUST-

WOW

EVERYONES GOT GUNS AND EVERYTHING OH MY GODDDDD

GIVE IT UP FOR DISPATCH 

you know it’s really funny, cause tiffany ain’t nowhere to be found

“next one goes in your head” OOOOOOOOOOOH SHE’S A BOSS ASS BITCH BROOO YESSSSSSS

(i know, two different songs, but ya gotta admit, it applies)

“you don’t get to die” 

i just-

hands down, most powerful line in the whole episode.

it’s an odd form of vengeance, saving the man that attacked you multiple times from the release of death

 that’s what it would’ve been tho

a release

he would’ve died, and he wouldn’t of had to pay for any of his actions

but instead, josh saved his sorry ass

so he gets to pay for this in the land of the living

the best revenge, actually

and, josh saved a life

he’s worthwhile

“i’m not goin back” well i knew mr. clean was gonna die from the beginning sooooooo

“we’ve got dispatch”  and it’s finally over

i’m kinda bummed that we didn’t get to see SEAL!buck or the rest of the firefam but we got  BAMF!dispatch and that was enough lmao

kudos to those off duty dispatches as well, like y’all just walked past the dead body and moved on from the whole hostage situation to do your already stressful job

CHIM’S FACE WHEN HE SEES MADDIE I AM SOBBING

THEY SAID MADNEY RIGHTS Y’ALL😭😭😭

this hug is everythinggggg 

lo key buck watching from afar breaks my heart ahaha

“she already has everything she needs”

....this is tea for another day, but...

buck, you do know people need you as much as you need them, right?

....right?

still not over that hug tho

ayeeee wassup bobby!

how was the camping trip i was extremely against?

oooooh i love the crime recaps!

i may or may not have been like buck in the bank episode when he said ‘i’m some confused, can you start over’

...ahem....

“wait....you didn’t round her up too?”

ok listen....

while i don’t condone stealing and and the extreme amount of violence they used,

i do condone outsmarting men that think less of you because you are a woman

you are a boss tiffany, and i’m actually kind of sad you got caught

“tiffany was the real mastermind” can i just.....

*BLASTS BOSS BITCH FROM THE ROOFTOPS CAUSE WOMEN OWNED THIS EPISODE! THEY WERE SO DAMN BADASS*

thanks 9-1-1 writers for that, btw. 

gotta admit, as much as they rip out our hearts and stomp on em, they know what they are doin

jake you shady shady bitch

ngl tho both plans were solid 

maybe if it was done completely by women it would’ve worked :)

“looks  like your trip’s been delayed...by about 5 to 15 years” athena you got the best lines yo

jake f’ed up the other plan too lmaoo

like i said, if it was all women, they would’ve pulled this off

and they end it with madney

gosh i loved this episode

So! These were my thoughts on 3x14! Let me know what you think, and hit up my ask box if you want me to post my thoughts on another episode! Later taters!

Oh yeah, if you liked this you can find my thoughts on ‘Pinned’ here!

#911 fox #911 on fox #911 season 3 #911 spoliers #madney #maddie buckley #evan buckley #chimney han #athena grant #my thoughts #kat lmaooo

[justsmilestuffhappens]

March 24th - Day 2: “Why are you naked?” + fun @evanbuckleyweek

Underneath Your Clothes

Maddie walked into the firehouse to give buck back his keys. Josh would pick her up soon to take her to work. Things had lined up just right.

She was about to walk into the locker room after greeting Matt the man behind taking care of the station this afternoon since she knew buck's combination.

The sound of the truck returning got her to turn back around. The sight that greeted her was straight out of a cartoon. Like the ones she used to sneak buck from the library or buy as a teenager.

"Why the hell are you naked!? Did your clothes burn off?" She saw buck holding onto the turnout coat wrapped around his midsection as what looked like another was on his shoulders.

"Are you okay? What was it?!" She wanted to check his skin but knew Hen and Chim would have already treated him or taken him in.

"No. They just vanished, like spooky magic or something. I still got my boots." Buck explained with a shrug while running past her into the locker room.

Chim and Hen were both trying to contain their laughter. "He's okay. Thankfully all the retirement home residents got a kick out of it and won't be pressing indecency charges against him, along with the staff." Chim said which still left more questions.

"How-?"

"We don't know. I wanna find out too but we can ask him more questions when he's dressed." Hen said while Eddie went to follow.

He was carrying a belt and suspenders which she guessed where the only things left from his clothes before. He merely nodded at her as he'd ran after finishing talking with Bobby.

"I thought we'd have to treat someone for a heart attack. It was the strangest thing. They just started falling off then they were gone to ribbons. We're lucky Eddie had his turnout coat on since buck's was in the truck." Bobby explained without really knowing what happened.

"So it really wasn't a fire?" Maddie asked looking at her watch. Josh was on his way by now.

"No. We had to get an older lady off the roof she got stuck on and treat her for dehydration." Hen said as they looked at Eddie holding up his coat while looking away so buck could pull some boxer briefs on.

"That's- how does that happen? Why Buck?" Maddie asked no one.

"We asked the same thing. I'm glad he was just embarrassed. I mean he didn't actually get hurt, right? " Chimney suggested.

Oh God. Buck really could have gotten hurt or arrested even.

"I think he's dressed. We can try talking to him." Hen said while Eddie dropped his coat to begin talking to buck behind the glass.

"Buck. Did you touch anything or did one of the residents do anything unusual?" Bobby asked.

"Umm Bobby, they're old people. I mean most of the things they do could be seen as weird but that's normal for them. I remember we moved through the crowd to get to the door with the gear before helping her."

"A guy did touch buck's arm." Eddie said with his own arms crossed. At buck's look of confusion he continued. "What? I mean he grabbed you for a second."

"He was just looking at my tattoo. It was harmless." Buck sighed but kept looking at Eddie.

"We don't know that." Bobby clarified.

"Did you do anything differently this morning or yesterday?" Hen asked.

"No. I got home late from Eddie's for movie night. Then I missed my first alarm. But nothing weird." Buck shrugged.

"Okay?" Hen said.

"Well, did you wash clothes yesterday finally? You missed doing it two days ago when I asked to borrow the jeep for today." Maddie held up his keys.

"Oh yeah, thanks. I did them before I passed out last night." Buck grabbed the keys and pocketed them.

"Did you use new detergent or softener?" Chim asked thinking about what maddie said.

"Well yeah. I ran out and got some at the gas station before I got home." Buck looked like he still didn't get it.

"It could have been too strong and messed up your clothes if they were already worn out. What was it called?" Hen asked.

"I don't remember. Some generic "B" name, like box-sil-o, big-x-el, something like that. I just grabbed enough for one small load because I needed clothes to wear in this morning. These are Eddie's spares since I didn't have any left here either," Buck tugged at the shirt he was wearing.

"Is it this one?" Hen pulled up an image for everyone to see.

"Yeah. See it's the tiniest bottle, it was just right for the bit i had to do." Buck nodded.

"Buck this says it's concentrated though. You gotta dilute this or only use a little from it. Did you pour the whole bottle in?" Hen's mouth was open as chim smacked his own head.

"Huh. Maybe that's why." Buck tilted his head.

"Only you could mess up your clothes enough for them to fall off buck." Eddie shook his head.

"What? It was an honest mistake. I was tired and in a hurry. I bet you would do the same thing." Buck shot back nudging him in turn.

"Just please be careful next time. Chim's right, it could have been at a more inconvenient time like on a dangerous call Buck." Bobby said putting a hand on his shoulder. "Do you, have a rash?" He looked at buck's neck.

"Umm. It might be a good idea to go take a shower Buck. Some of that stuff probably rubbed onto your skin and you were sweating man." Chimney said as they heard a car honking outside.

Maddie's phone beeped. "Oh it's Josh. I've gotta go. I'm glad you're okay Buck. See you later. Thanks again. Bye everyone." Maddie kissed chim before hurrying outside.

"Uh. Now I'm itchy." Buck complained rubbing his arms and chest.

"Then go take a shower already." Eddie pushed him toward that direction while muttering something buck knew was rude but wasn't paying attention to with his skin feeling irritated.

"So an old guy grabbed buck?" Hen asked chim.

"I doubt Eddie'd make that up." Chim said while they went to the stairs.

"Buck's tattoo was similar to the gentleman's own." Bobby said. "A nurse said so, he was wearing a sweater so we couldn't see it though."

"Hmm. That's cool." Chim said.

"Thinking about getting a tattoo chim? Gonna join their little club." Hen joked.

"1. Two's not a club. And 2. Who says I don't already have one." Chim smirked.

"I've known you for what feels like forever and I'm your bestie. If you had one I think I'd know by now."

"Ok, you're right. And no. I don't want a tattoo. I'm perfectly fine with the scar on my forehead. It's enough for me,"

When Buck and Eddie came up for lunch his skin looked better but he still had a blush on his cheeks.

"You okay there Buck?" Hen asked.

"You wanna tell them or should I?" Eddie asks with a smile. Buck's reluctant nod made him continue. "His spare underwear were in the same batch so now he's-"

"Going commando?" Chim shot back.

"No! I'm borrowing Eddie's. Which I'll wash the right way before returning them. I just threw away the rest of everything that were in that load now," Buck huffed defeated.

Hen snorted loudly before Bobby looked over from the stove.

"Everything okay?" He asked.

"Yeah cap!" Eddie said as buck shot Hen and Chim a dirty look.

#firefam #fire fam #buck Buckley #evanbuckleyweek #911 #evan buck Buckley #9 1 1 #evan Buckley #long #fic #ficlet #my writing #solo mio #idek #Eddie Diaz #maddie kendall #maddie buckley #hen wilson #chimney han #bobby nash #tags #what was Eddie doing while buck was in the shower #well you can decide wink #also I'm sorry buddy i had to follow the idea but you didn't get hurt too much #buddie #i don't care if it's unrealistic it was fun to make #i tried #ew2020 #evanweek2020 #the tag sounds right it's been a unbelievable year and it's just getting started

[lilywoood]

Small Bump 2/?

So here it is part two of small bump, I don’t really know how long this fic would be, and I know I still have a lot of prompt to finish but bare with me cause that fic won’t leave me alone.

Tag list : @diazbuckleysworld @cherishingstydia @felicitous-one @translucent-bisexual @gxtop @shipping-queen @impossiblealice @sergeant-barnes-and-his-captain @zola9612 @meloingly @my-name-i-we @profangirl1999

If you want to be added to Small Bump tag list just hit my ask box ♥️

Words count : 933

Song : All I Want - Kodaline

—————————————————

-Maddie please I need you, Buck sniffled, I need my big sister, he prayed...

When Maddie heard her brother’s voicemail two things happened, first she felt herself lose the grip she had on her coffee mug, she heard it fall to the floor and saw it breaking into thousand of little broken porcelain pieces, second she saw herself run to her locker and grab her stuffs...

Never once acknowledging what she was doing, it was as if a switch had been turned, the protective big sister one, she stopped thinking clearly, stopped caring about her entourage, there was only one thing running in her head right now and that was going to Buck, finding out what was happening to Buck, protecting Buck...

She could see herself run toward the exit, could hear Josh calling after her, could feel him grabbing her hand to stop her from doing so, she could see his lips moving and forming words, she could see the worry in his eyes but she couldn’t care less, Buck needed her and she needed to go.

-Maddie, Josh worried seeing her absence of reaction, Maddie what’s happening, he tried again squeezing her forearm.

-Buck, she breathed sadly, Buck he needs me, she pleaded tears menacing to fall.

-Go, Josh responded understandingly, I got your back go, he pressed when she didn’t made any move.

She nodded, hands shaking, teary eyed and lips quivering, Josh hugged her quickly, rubbing her arms before letting her go, she mouthed a quick thank you to the man who quickly became her best friend before rushing to her car.

Her hands were still shacking when she grabbed her keys, she couldn’t help but play the voicemail over and over again in her head, dread was sitting on the pit of her stomach, she didn’t know what was awaiting her, didn’t know in what state she’ll find her brother and that was what scared her the most...

—-

It’s heavy, so so heavy, so painful and suffocating he didn’t know how to deal with this, didn’t know how he would face the other, still it’s taunting him, the pink lines are still engraved in his mind, memories of that famous night are getting clearer and clearer.

He could feel he ghost of Eddie’s touch on his skin, could remember his hands traveling his body, could hear the low rumble of his voice, could feel his hot breath on his neck... If he closed his eyes he could go back to that famous night, could remember how he felt whole in Eddie’s arms, how he felt like he was finally home...

He was empty, cold and wide awake, his eyes emptily fixing the wall in front of him, his hands absently caressing his slightly bumped belly, they were alone, Eddie had abandoned them, and Buck didn’t even ressent him...

—

Most of the time Maddie didn’t mind LA shitty traffic, most of the time she could deal with it, she’ll play her special playlist and wait, today wasn’t like most of the time though and she found herself honking and cursing at every slow cars...

Stress and worry were eating her alive, she’d tried to call Buck, tried to reach him, tried to reassure him, tried to tell him she was on her way but he never answered, her calls were sent straight to voicemail and that was scaring her...

—

The first thing Maddie noticed when she finally arrived at Buck’s condo was how quiet it was, loudly and painfully quiet, the kind of worrying disturbing silence you could only witness on horror movies.

She searched all the house for her brother until she heard the rumble of water in the bathroom, she just heard the water, not the sound of Buck showering, these setting all her alarms off, she decided that since he called her clearly distressed he couldn’t care less of privacy, she needed to make sure he was ok, that he didn’t do something stupid, something life threatening...

-Evan, she called, Evan if you’re here I’m coming, she announced opening the door.

There he was sitting fully clothed in his shower, his lips blue and trembling, his skin pale and eyes bloodshot, a gasp escaped Maddie’s lips as she rushed to his side and turned off the water.

She could see the pain, the raw sadness and despair in her little brothers eyes, she felt herself tear up, she grabbed his towel and covered him with it busying herself to prevent the tears from falling.

-Evan, she croaked kissing his forehead, Evan you hear me, she murmured.

At the sound of his sister voice Buck raised his head smiling tiredly, he then hugged her, hiding his head on the crook of her neck, nuzzling her like he used to when they were younger and he had nightmares.

-You want to tell me what’s wrong, she softly demanded running her hand in his hair, massaging his scalp.

-I screwed up Maddie, he avowed with a shaky breath, I screwed up so bad, he teared, so so bad, he chuckled drily.

-Tell me, she asked encouragingly forcing him to look at her.

He shook his head tending her the three taunting sticks, she frowned confused before seeing what he meant.

-Who knows, she quizzed squeezing his shoulder.

-Only you and I, he breathed, Eddie can’t know Mads, he pleaded, neither Chim, he pressed distressed.

-I won’t tell, she promised embrassing him tightly, I’m with you every step of the way, she swore kissing his temples.

-Thank you Maddie, Buck mumbled closing his eyes tiredness overcoming him.

#buddie fix #buddie fic #buck x eddie #madney #evan buckley #maddie buckley #eddie diaz #small bunp buddie #buddie angst #hurt comfort #911fic #911 on fox #tv: 911 #eddie x buck #miscommunication #911onfox #buddie

[crazybagelbitch]

“Stop apologising for other people! You’re not the shitty one!” 

“Okay, your brother isn’t... woah, I’m dizzy... what was I... your brother isn’t a shitty person. Just a bad day. Didn’t mean for me to fall back and hit the fire truck.”

“But he PUSHED you!” she yells, “he was angry, and you just teased him a little and pushed you and now you’re hurt! I’m going to kill him--”

“Maddie--”

“He hurt you! He hurt you, Chimney! It’s not okay!”

“...it would be a bad idea to leave me alone when I have a head injury,” Chimney says in a last ditch effort to save Buck from Maddie’s wrath.

Maddie calls Josh to come over and babysit him.

Sorry, Buck, he tried.

Buck, to his credit, seems to have accepted his fate. He does not look surprised when he opens the door and sees her, and lets her stomp right inside. He just sits down on the couch and gives her a look that says “I’m ready for that.”

“Explain yourself.”

“Maddie--”

“No, scratch that, shut the fuck up because there’s no reasonable explanation for this. You gave my baby, my Howie, a concussion!”

“A concussion? Shit. Is he ok--”

“No, he’s not okay you dumb fuck! He has a concussion because you shoved him into a fire truck just because he made a stupid joke!”

“Maddie,” he says slowly, admittedly terrified of her and all the curse words flying out of her mouth at the moment, “I am so sorry. It was stupid and Chimney didn’t deserve--”

“Of course he didn’t deserve it! He’s my sweet, kind baby and you pushed him and now he feels sick and dizzy and it’s all your stupid fault!”

“I was upset... I was really upset after Bobby and I got in an argument about a decision I made in the field and I... it wasn’t fair. It was fucked up and there are no words for how sorry I am, Mads.”

“Sorry’s not good enough!” she shouts, and the mascara running down her cheeks would be reassuring to him if he didn’t already know that Maddie was an angry crier.

Scratch that, rage crier.

“I know it isn’t--”

“He could hardly stand before I left him with Josh. My Chimney, and he couldn’t... do you have any idea how fucking stupid you are? How much I hate you right now? How much I wish I wasn’t morally opposed to violence?”

“Maddie--”

“You never think things through! You just go with whatever your impulse is, and I’ve been trying to train you out of that for years!”

“Okay, train me? I’m your brother, Maddie, not a dog.”

“Yeah, well I’m starting to think a dog might be a lot smarter than you,” she snaps, and honestly, Buck has to admit that he’s a little impressed.

“...Anything else you’d like to get off your chest?”

“You stupid little [redacted]! I can’t believe I’m not there for twenty four god damn hours and you go give my boyfriend a concussion! Who the fuck do you think you are, John Cena? It’s fucking firefighting, not the MMA! Besides, I thought that was Eddie’s thing... dumbass.”

“Okay, Eddie didn’t even do any--”

“Yeah, well he’s a dense ass dickhead for not immediately telling me Chimney was hurt, and you and all your little firefighter friends, or should I say fight club members, are, too.”

“Maddie, he didn’t seem hurt at all after. He took a bump but he seemed fine, I promise. That’s why no one called you.”

“Well, is he okay, Evan? Josh just texted me that he puked in the vase mom gave me, so I think the fuck not!”

“You don’t even like the vase and only keep it because you said you’d feel guilty if you got rid of--”

“You’re lucky I have to get back to my puking concussed boyfriend, so you’re safe for now, but trust me, we’re not done here. By the time I’m done with you, you won’t have one tiny SHRED of self esteem left!”

#you have no idea how hard i was laughing writing this #maddie fucking snapped

[blurry-fics]

Chapter Twelve

Where Did We Go | Series Masterlist

Warnings: Angst, angry!Tyler

Word Count: 2049

Author’s Note: Happy Valentine’s Day! I hope you enjoy this chapter today :) (picture credit)

I idly drew doodles in the margins of my notepad as the team droned on about some matter that didn’t really concern me. My head was so heavy on my hand that I knew it would leave a mark when I finally pulled away, but I didn’t care. Next to me, Josh actually seemed to be paying attention, but he was still drumming his fingers on the table. I liked the beat.

Another song lyric floated through my brain, so I quickly wrote it down beneath the others before it got away from me. Lately, it felt like the only thing these meetings were good for was coming up with fragments of song lyrics and making my throat sore. Nothing else productive ever seemed to get done.

“We got the visuals back from the artists. I have some stills here, but you should all be receiving an email tonight with the full videos for review.”

Now this actually seemed interesting. I scribbled down the words “visual review” in the corner of my page, ripped it off, and stuck it into my pocket. Nobody seemed to notice.

“We think that the visuals are adequate, but not exactly as we intended.”

We?

“And as a result, we’re thinking about cutting the payment of the artists. This will also save us some room in the budget to put elsewhere.”

I leaned forward in my chair. People’s eyes immediately went to me, anticipating what I was about to say.

“Cutting the artist’s pay? How do we know if their work is ‘adequate’ or not if my team hasn’t even had a chance to do a full review?”

“Well our artistic board-”

“Exactly, your artistic board. Last time I checked, your artistic board isn’t the one putting on a show,” I said. “And no matter how we feel about the visuals, the artists did the work and deserve full payment for their time and effort.”

“But they didn’t deliver-”

“They did. The visuals were done to the best of their ability and provided by the deadline that we gave them. We’re giving them full payment and my team can decide whether the work is satisfactory or not.”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Joseph, but then we’re going to have to raise ticket prices to make up for the losses.”

“What is all this crap about raising ticket prices?” My voice was getting louder now. “We gave you the budget months ago! Everything was laid out with enough money to cover all costs and keep ticket prices exactly where we wanted them, but your company decided to put things off until it didn’t work anymore.” Josh reached out and put a hand on my back. My shoulders relaxed, but my voice remained raised. “Our fans are not in charge of paying the price for your poor choices. That art looks fantastic and, if I’m being honest, the only people here that aren’t delivering satisfactory work is you.”

I stood up then, sending my chair flying out behind me. Josh’s hand fell away from my back. I turned on my heel and headed for the door, still fuming.

“Where are you going?” someone asked. I couldn’t place the voice.

“I’m taking a break. I’ll be back in ten.”

I walked down the hallway, unsure of where I was going, until I found a sign marked with the stairs. My hands were curled into fists at my side until my nails were digging into my palms. It had been a long time since I was this angry, but the stupidity of the company we had chosen to put on this tour was sending me over the edge. Tour was only a week and a half away and it still felt like we had more loose ends than we did answers.

Most of all, I hated that this was what I was missing out on time with my family for.

I pulled my phone out of my pocket and immediately dialed Y/N’s number. She would know what to say to get me calm again before I walked back into that conference room. My leg bounced as the phone rang, alleviating only a small portion of the emotions I was feeling. They were quickly getting overwhelming.

“Tyler?” she answered. Just that simple word was enough to release some of the tension in my shoulders.

“Hi, love.”

“What’s going on? Aren’t you supposed to be in a meeting right now?”

I pinched the bridge of my nose, “Yes, but it’s not going well. I just blew up on the company representative.”

“Oh no,” she sighed. “What are they trying to get you to do today?”

“Raise ticket prices again! It doesn’t matter how many times I tell them I don’t want to do that, they won’t let it go.”

“Ty, hey, it’s ok. At the end of the day, you still have the power in this situation.”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Is there somewhere else that you can cut costs a little bit? Weren’t you talking about maybe switching out some of the fancier effects for something a little simpler?”

“Yeah, there’s definitely places that we could do it, they just don’t like to listen to those ideas as much. It’s hard to convince them that it would actually help the budget.”

“I know, but it’s worth a shot. It’s like I’ve been saying, you and Josh just need to team up and get your ideas in there. Plus, you have Mark to back you up too. The power is there.”

“I’ll talk to them before the next meeting and really get things solid. I hate to ignore the progress that we are making, but the problems just feel so much bigger right now.”

“You’re going to get this worked out, Ty. I know you will. Think of how much you’ve been through to get here. Even if, at the end of the day, things don’t work out exactly how you want them to, you know people will be happy as long as you’re there singing the songs with them. You were popular even before you had the big productions.”

I sighed. “You’re right. I’ll try to keep that in mind. I just get so wrapped up in this vision that Josh and I created that I forget it’s the music that really matters. Thank you.”

“Of course. I know the show is going to be great no matter what you end up doing.”

“You always know the right thing to say,” I smiled.

“It’s a talent of mine,” she laughed.

“I just wish that I wasn’t stuck at this stupid meeting today.”

“It’s ok, Ty,” she said, but I could tell that her tone had changed. “You’re doing important band stuff. We’ll have a break soon enough.”

“I hope so.”

Our conversation was interrupted by the door to the stairs swinging open. Josh’s head poked through the door, quickly scanning the area. Relief came over his face as soon as he saw me.

“There you are. We need you back in the conference room. Things are happening.”

“Ok, let me finish this up and then I’ll be there.”

Josh nodded and disappeared again, letting the door swing shut behind him. I waited for it to fully close before I started talking to Y/N again.

“Sorry about that. Josh showed up.”

“I heard.”

“Anyway, I guess they need me back there.”

“Time to let you go?”

“Yeah.”

“Alright. I love you, and don’t let them get to you, ok, Ty? I know you can find a way to put on the show you’ve been dreaming about.”

“Thank you, Y/N. I love you too.”

“Bye.”

“Wait.”

“Yeah?”

“Did you remember that I’m going over to my parents’ tonight for dinner?”

“I remember now,” she laughed. It sounded forced.

“Ok.”

“Good luck, Ty.”

“Thanks.”

“Bye.”

“Bye.”

I ended the call, now feeling a different sort of discomfort in my chest. It took me a moment to finally get off the steps and walk out the door back towards the conference room. My mind was running its endless loop of questions, but no matter where I looked, I came up with no answers. It felt like a weight in my head, dragging me further and further down.

I hadn’t felt that way in a long time.

*     *     *

The meeting finally ended around four that night. There was another one scheduled for the next day - which the company claimed would be the last additional meeting we had to schedule - although after today’s events, I was feeling hopeful. They were finally starting to listen to the ideas that Josh and I had, helped along by the fact that Y/N had given me a new sense of confidence about the show. After a few more emails and phone calls, I was sure that things would finally start coming together.

My mom was the one to open the door when I knocked. She immediately pulled me into a hug, squeezing me tight enough that I nearly coughed. I didn’t blame her, I had only been able to find enough time to see my family once since I had gotten home from tour a week and a half ago, and most of my siblings hadn’t even been around. This time had been a little more planned so that Zack and Maddy would be able to stop by too.

“I’ve missed you so much,” my mom said, pressing a kiss to the top of my head.

“I’ve missed you too, Mom.”

I went around and hugged each of my siblings and my dad. It was nice to have everyone together again for a family dinner. The last time we had a get together like this was before the Australian leg of the tour nearly a month and a half ago.

“Dinner is already ready, if you guys want to eat. I made it early since I figured you would be hungry after your meeting, Tyler.”

“Thanks,” I smiled.

Everyone stayed pretty quiet, aside from small talk, as we dished up our food. I was sure that my family was full of questions to ask me, but they knew better than to try and ask before I was settled at the table. Right now, my mind was on food and food only.

We eventually all sat down at the table in the places that we had been assigned since childhood. Once everyone was comfortable and had taken a couple bites of food, the questions slowly began to come out.

“How was your meeting today, Tyler?” my dad asked.

“It was alright. I kind of blew up on the representative today-”

“Tyler,” my mom chimed in. Zack barely concealed a laugh.

“Mom, listen, it’s only because they keep trying to make us raise ticket prices even though we’ve had the budget planned out for weeks. It didn’t matter how many times I told them that wasn’t going to happen, they kept insisting.”

My mom kept a disappointed look on her face, but deep down I could tell that she knew I was right. From day one, she had always made sure that I knew staying true to myself was vital as I continued to pursue music. That advice had stuck with me since.

“Are they starting to listen though?” Maddy asked. “I mean, there’s only like a week and a half until tour starts, right?”

“Yeah, they’re finally coming around. Josh and I have been fighting with them pretty much all week, though. They’re bringing us in for another meeting tomorrow.”

“Another one?” Jay asked.

“They flew Josh in?” Zack chimed in right after.

“Yes and yes. That’s how big of a problem all of this is.”

“Geez,” my dad said. “That sounds intense.”

“It is. I’m barely hanging on by a thread here.”

My mom reached over and reassuringly rubbed my shoulder. “You’re safe here, Tyler. We’re not going to let you fall.”

I quickly glanced around the table to see that the rest of my family was nodding along with my mom. Warmth spread throughout my chest at knowing that they still had my back, even if I couldn’t always make as much time as I wanted to for them. At the end of the day, they were still my family.

We’re not going to let you fall.

*     *     *     *     *

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[gaytrashgoblin]

Merry Pitchmas!

Happy holidays from your no longer secret santa, @prettylittlesestras!

Chloe was excited. Since they weren’t speaking during the holidays last year, because of the whole quitting thing, this would be the first time Chloe would get to celebrate her favorite holiday with her favorite person! Knowing how tense things were for Beca with her father, she figured the girl would be staying in the Bella house for Christmas. Which is why she begged off going home to see her parents and brother this year. So, excited was probably an understatement. Chloe was ecstatic. Until she saw Beca start packing a week before the holiday.

“Hey, whatcha up to?” she asked as she bounced into the brunette’s room.

“Packing to head home. You going down to Florida?”

“Oh, um, not this year no…” she trailed off. Beca looked up at her with a raised eyebrow.

“How come?”

“I just… well I thought you were staying here because of your dad, and I didn’t want you to be alone…” Beca quickly moved back out of her closet at the admission, fixing Chloe with an incredulous stare.

“Wait, for real? You blew off your family to keep me company?” When the redhead nodded, Beca shook her head with a laugh. “Okay, weirdo. Go pack your stuff. And it’s snowing, so keep that in mind.”

“Pack my stuff? I just told you-”

“Yeah, no, I’m not gonna leave you stranded when you decided to stay for me or whatever. So, go pack your stuff, you’re coming to Oregon with me. And don’t even try to argue, my mom wants to meet you anyway,” she added when she saw the redhead prepare to say something. Chloe was the only person she had ever felt so comfortable around. And maybe it filled her stomach with butterflies that she had decided to stay to prevent Beca from being alone. And maybe it made Beca feel like maybe she had a real shot with the girl. And maybe she wanted to introduce her closest friend to her mom and family. Maybe.

“Your mom won’t mind? I don’t wanna crash your celebration.” Beca sighed as she moved from her bag to stand in front of her.

“Chloe, of course you can come. You’re like, my best friend. I’ve… never really had one before, so like, my mom wanted to meet you at some point anyway, because you got me out of my shell, or whatever,” she said shyly. The awkwardness she had felt with the admission was well worth it to see the bright smile on Chloe’s face as the girl squealed happily, then jumped into her, wrapping her arms around her tightly.

“I’m so excited! I can’t wait!”

“Ok nerd!” Beca called after her as she ran to her room to pack. This would be an interesting trip.

The flight had been boring, seeing as they both slept through it. As Beca was grabbing their bags, slapping Chloe’s outstretched hand away, a loud voice rang out.

“Bumblebee!” A brunette woman had yelled. Beca smiled and whipped her head around. She dropped the bags and ran at the woman, launching herself into her. She was only a few inches taller than Beca, and Chloe could see the woman was her mother, since they looked almost exactly the same. Once she was back on her own feet, Beca realized she had dropped their stuff and picked it up while gesturing the redhead over.

“Chlo, this is my mom, Linda. Mama, this is Chloe,” she introduced. To Chloe’s surprise, the woman drew her into a hug.

“It’s great to meet you, Chloe! I’ve heard so much about you!”

“It’s great to meet you too,” she replied. As her mother started talking to Chloe, Beca watched with a fond smile. She missed her mom like crazy, and she was glad that she liked Chloe. If the redhead’s surprised smile was anything to go by, the feeling was mutual. Beca opted to sit in the back with Chloe once they got to the car, and she asked her mom the dreaded question.

“So, who all made it this year? I figure we’re the last to show up?” Her mom hummed.

“Yeah, you’re fashionably late, as usual. Let’s see, your sister and her family, your aunt and her family, Uncle Josh, Grams and Gramps…” She trailed off, making Beca tense.

“How many of the cousins made it?”

“Oh, you know, Jason, Maddie, Liv, Brandy, and Peter.” Beca’s mother cackled when Beca groaned. Chloe had no idea the brunette had such a large family. She had kind of assumed Beca didn’t have much family. At her look of confusion, Beca clarified.

“Right, so, my family should all love you. The only problem is my cousins, who are all assholes. To me specifically.”

“Oh stop exaggerating!” Her mom added. “They do love to tease you though.”

“About what?”

“Oh, uh, I’m the only cousin that… likes girls. Which they find hilarious, since they can all talk about boys and I would rather not.” Beca’s face had gone red, knowing that, while she didn’t hide it, she didn’t really make an effort to tell anyone either. She’s only liked one girl since she came to Barden, and said girl is currently sitting, like, three inches from her.

“Wait, what! Why’d you never tell me that? CR and I totally thought we were the only sapphics in the house,” she pouted playfully. Beca just nudged her with her shoulder with a shrug.

“I wasn’t hiding it or anything. It just… never came up.” Chloe nodded, bumping her shoulder back playfully with a smile. A few minutes later, they pulled up to Beca’s childhood home.

“Oh, Beca, do you and Chloe mind sharing your room? We’re a little short on space since so many made it out this year.”

“Nope, we’re cool,” she said with no hesitation. She and Chloe had shared a bed far more than once; they’d be fine.

“Alright, well, once you get your stuff settled, you can come introduce Chloe to the family.”

“Sure thing ma,” she replied, ushering Chloe down the hall and into her bedroom. It was slate grey with white baseboards. Her room was covered with band and musician posters, concert photos and signed memorabilia, and loads of pictures of her and her family.

“I didn’t know you were so close to your family, Becs.” Beca’s brows furrowed.

“What d’you mean? I talk about my sister Sarah all the time. And my aunts Danielle and Rin.” Chloe’s jaw dropped. Beca had talked about all those people rather frequently.

“Maybe you should have told me at some point that they were related to you!” Chloe said with a wide smile.

“I thought I did. My bad,” she said with a shy smile. “So, ready for the inquisition?” Chloe nodded with another smile. Chloe grabbed Beca’s hand and laced their fingers as Beca directed them to the backyard, and the brunette didn’t even think about it. They did it pretty much all the time, so she wasn’t phased by it. As they stepped out, there was a chorus of people yelling Beca’s name or some nickname of hers. Beca smiled at them, then gestured to Chloe.

“Hey guys! This is Chloe Beale, my best friend and co-captain of the Bellas.” Beca walked them around, greeting her various family members and introducing Chloe properly. They were about to move to the group of people that looked their age when someone jumped onto Beca from behind.

“You sneaky bitch! You think you could get away without seeing me!” Beca shouted in surprise, but caught the girl’s legs from below so she didn’t fall nonetheless.

“Sarah! What the fuck have I told you about jumping on me? One of these days I am going to just let you fall on your ass!”

“Ah no you won’t. You love me too much, sis,” she said smugly as she dropped onto the floor. Beca turned around and punched her sister in the arm with a barely contained smile.

“Asshole.”

“Pot. Kettle. Anyway, who is this?” She said, looking at Chloe, who stepped in then.

“Hi, I’m Chloe! Beca’s told me so much about you.”

“Oh! You’re, Chloe, huh? Beca’s definitely mentioned you before,” she said with a smirk directed at her younger sister, turning her face bright red.

“Alright, that’s enough. Where’s Tommy and baby Lou?”

“I here auntie B!” The little boy shouted as he ran at Beca. Chloe watched with undisguised awe as Beca scooped up the maybe four year old boy and tickled him with her free hand.

“There you are! I missed you. You’re so big, you’re gonna be bigger than me in no time!”

“But you’re tiny, auntie B,” he said through his giggles. Beca’s jaw fell when her sister started cackling. The boy wiggled out of her grasp and started running around before she could respond. Chloe walked over and wrapped her arm around the brunette’s shoulder, whispering to her.

“It’s okay. I love that you’re tiny.” Beca’s face went red again, and Chloe smiled.

“Nerd,” Beca responded fondly. Chloe shrugged and kissed her cheek before bouncing toward the patio to get something to drink, Beca following a few steps behind. She saw her mother, and her two favorite aunts, watching her and Chloe’s interactions closely. Her aunt Danielle looked at her pointedly while Chloe was distracted, and Beca made a cut throat gesture. Of course her mother and her two gay aunts knew about her feelings for Chloe. As if the way she acted around the redhead wasn’t a big enough rainbow flag for her family to know she was head over heels in love. Which she had never been before. Her aunt put her hands up in a surrender gesture, so Beca turned back to Chloe, who was carrying a drink for both of them. She handed Beca her drink with a silent smile.

“So, are you going to introduce me to the infamous cousins?”

“Not if I can avoid it,” Beca muttered, taking a sip of her drink. Beca heard Rin, her aunt Danielle’s wife, call out for Chloe. The two of them both looked up, but Chloe looked to Beca.

“Go ahead. If they meant me they would have said me, I’m sure,” she said with a roll of her eyes.

“Okay. You know where I’ll be then,” she chirped, making her way over to Beca’s aunts and mom. As soon as Chloe sat down, Beca was grabbed from behind and being dragged away with a hand over her mouth. She fought for all of ten seconds before rolling her eyes and biting the hand over her mouth.

“Ow! She fucking bit me!”

“Damn right I did, you bitch,” Beca responded to her cousin Brandy, who had been the one that grabbed her. “You all know better than to grab me if you want your limbs and nuts left in tact,” she said to the group of cousins that was gathered in the garden on the side of the house.

“Yeah, yeah. Big bad Beca’s gonna get me, whatever. Now, tell us about the girl you brought with you! Who is she? You two look awfully comfortable,” her very stereotypically gay cousin Peter asked.

“Chloe? She’s, like, my best friend. Co-captain of my club,” she said with a shrug. All five cousins looked at her with disbelieving expressions.

“Right,” Peter said, dragging out the word. “And I’m the captain of the football team.” Beca scoffed.

“Beca, we’ve been watching you two. Don’t even try to deny the fact that you two are together,” Madison added, making Beca groan.

“We are not!”

“Bu you want to be,” Olivia said softly. “You want to be with her, don’t you?”

“What is with you guys? Chloe is my best friend, why can’t you just leave it alone?”

“Because it’s obvious that you like her, just admit it!” Jason said. Beca stepped toward him threateningly as she responded.

“Fine! I like her! The only friend I’ve ever really had, and I fucking like her! Happy?!” Jason’s condescending smirk made her want to punch him, so she turned to leave. Her anger left her body instantly as she saw Chloe standing a few feet behind her, staring at her with a dropped jaw. Beca half screamed in irritation as she stormed away from her asshole cousins. She grabbed Chloe’s hand as she passed and dragged the redhead with her as she went straight into the house and to her bedroom. Slamming the door, Beca started pacing her bedroom, muttering under her breath.

“Can’t believe… murder him… like this… god damnit.” On her maybe tenth or eleventh turn, Chloe caught her by her shoulders. Beca huffed, her head dropping as she stared at the floor.

“So, those are my cousins,” she said blankly.

“Beca… is- is what you said true? Do you like me?”

“I- well, I mean, yeah, but it’s not a big deal, or anything. I’m not gonna make things weird between us, cuz you’re still my friend, so it’s totally fine, and we can-” Beca was cut off by Chloe putting her hand over her mouth. She looked up at her for the first time since her outburst with her cousins. And she saw Chloe smiling softly at her.

“Bec, I like you too,” was all she said. Beca’s eyes bugged out. “Yes, seriously. I have for a long time,” she said with an eyeroll at the brunette’s surprise. Beca tugged at the hand over her mouth, and Chloe let her move it. She was glad she did when Beca didn’t drop her hand, and instead laced their fingers together.

“So… does that mean that I can kiss you?” Beca asked, lightly drawing circles on the redhead’s palm. Chloe’s blinding smile was all the answer she needed to lean forward and press their lips together softly. After a few seconds, Beca pulled back, smiling like an idiot. But it was okay because Chloe looked a lot like she did.

“I guess now I know who I’ll be kissing under the mistletoe,” Beca said with a smirk.

“You don’t need the excuse of mistletoe to kiss me.” Beca smiled.

“No. I guess I don’t.” They were silent for a ew moments. “Chlo?”

“Hmm?”

“Be my girlfriend?”

“I thought you’d never ask,” she responded giddily. Beca leaned in and kissed her again.

“I’m glad you invited me to come home with you for Christmas.”

“Me too. You’re the best Christmas gift ever.” Chloe blushed with a smile.

“Shut up and kiss me,” Chloe whispered to her. So she did. Silently Chloe agreed with her.

Best Christmas ever!

#pitchmas 2017 #merry pitchmas 2017 #bechloe #prettylittlesestras #secret santa

[oh-ishouldnt]

Fixed - first part

Fixed - part 1/2 | Jack Maynard | Imagine Word count: 2246 Request: Can you write an imagine where you and Jack have a tickle fight? | Can you do a jack one? A/N: Actually, this one was my first request, sorry for taking so long to do it! I wasn’t inspired to do an imagine with Jack, but when I heard Fixed by New Hope Club all I could think about was: “omg Jack Jack Jack” lol Hope you all gonna like it! See you! (Also, the second part is already finished but I didn’t want to post it all at once because I thought it would be an imagine too long) You can find my other Buttercream Squad stuff in here | Requests are open

After:

      “Y/N, please, Just tell what the problem is. “Jack asked you frustrated.

        He was at your house, in your living room, and you didn’t know anymore why you started arguing with each other. The fight was about a lot of things and, at the same time, about nothing.

        “It’s nothing, Jack.”

        “Of course it’s something, Y/N.” He argued.

      You had this fight wish inside you since last week and it was driving you crazy. You knew exactly why you were acting like that, however, you were trying to avoid the huge discussion it would cause.

‘”You don’t wanna know, ok?” You declared. “Just leave it.” You were tired of fighting.

        “I do wanna know. For fuck’s sake, you are my girlfriend, Y/N. You are pissed and I’m guessing it’s only with me.”

        You were friends with Conor before even met Jack. You went out with the Maynard brothers quite often and on an Uber or another, you got to talk to youngest one and it just happened: before you could react, you were kissing Jack Maynard and spending more time with him than without.

        “Jack, stop.” You said. You knew you would only be even angrier on that moment if you told him what was going on. “Let’s sleep.”

        You two went have dinner with his brother, Josh, Caspar and Maddie. You couldn’t stare Jack, being rude to him without noticing or avoiding getting involved on the same topic conversations than him. You left Jack without a single clue about why you were acting like that (even when you couldn’t avoid being such an ass) and you hated yourself for that. You were a coward, a bloody coward.

        “No, we are not going to sleep without you telling me what the fuck is happening to you. I have the right to know why my girlfriend is mad at me.”

        “Alright then, Jack. Let’s talk.” You gave up, losing your patience. “Youwant it so much, so let’s talk, right?”

        “Thank you.” He said ironically.

        “Is it what I am to you? Am I your girlfriend?”

        “Oh, for fuck’s sake, Y/N.” He groaned. “We are over this conversation already. Yes, you’re my girlfriend; Yes, we are dating. Breaking news everyone! I can’t believe you’re pissed because of this. It’s ridiculous. Y/N, the only reason I don’t tell my viewers we’re dating is because I want to protect you. You know this, damn.

        “It’s because of your viewers or because you don’t want other girls to know we’re together?”

        “What the hell?” Jack asked, confused and angry. “Where is it all coming from?”

        “Does it matter?”

        “Yeah…?!”

        “No, it doesn’t.”

        “Something trigged it, I know. You wouldn’t be saying that out of nothing.”

        “Jack, seriously, it doesn’t matter. Can you just simply answer me where we are? Where we are going to?” You questioned, the discussion hit. “What do you want from me?”

        “What do I want from you? Y/N! What do you even mean with that?” He asked, passing his hands through his hair.

        “What I mean? I mean: What do you want from me?”

        “Are you fucking serious right now?”

        “Yes, I am.”

        He exhaled his breath hard. “I don’t want anything from you. Why suddenly you aren’t happy with us?”

        “It’s not what I said.” You argued, in defensive.

        “Yes, it is.”

        “No, it isn’t, Jack!” You exclaimed.

        “Tell me then, exactly, what did you said and what do you want to know from all these stupid questions.”

        “Is it because of other girls you don’t want to say we are together?”

        “Y/N!” He laughed if derision.

        “I’m serious here, Maynard.”

        “You don’t trust me at all, do you?” He asked, not believing your motivations.

        You were so exhausted of holding this back, feeling so insecure, that in that moment, you told Jack your worst thought. Almost screaming, you revealing:

        “No, Jack, I don’t.” You said finally. “It’s not because you are such a player, ok? It’s because you cheated before and I don’t know why this time would be different. You cheated before and I can’t think a single reason why you won’t do this to me.”

      He looked at you. You were so broke, your eyes showed you were cracked and you were almost crying. He could see your pain, the mistrust all over you. And although it was killing him, Jack couldn’t answer you. He didn’t had a single sentence that he could said, because why he wouldn’t do that with you? He didn’t know.

Before:       “And, finally, this is my brother, Jack.” Said Conor, introducing you to his younger brother.       Conor invited you to a party on his new place. You went there already (twice, actually), but it was a celebration to his new achievement.       “Hallelujah I’m meeting you!’ You exclaimed with a smile and shook his hand.       “Well, you must be Y/N,” Jack said smiling too. “the friend of Conor who is too beautiful to be at his company.”       You blushed.       “Oh, such a player, my brother.” Conor laughed. “Relax, Y/N, soon or later you will get used to it. Jack does that with every freaking girl he meets.”       “Not every girl…” Jack rolled his eyes. “Just the gorgeous ones.” He winked.

.

      “Y/N, Jack is here!” Conor shouted.       You and Con went have dinner and he went to your house before going to the club so you could get changed (you refused to get burgers using a dress). You agreed that Jack could head to your place because it would be easier, as the club was nearby your apartment.       “Fine!” You responded while putting your lipstick on.       “Let’s go, Y/N!” Jack told you just to be annoying.       “I’m going, I’m going.” You said, putting your shoeing your heels.       You took your purse that was on your bed and walked away from the room, meeting the brothers sat on your sofa on the living room with a smile on your face. You were excited to go out that night.       Jack could swear that his heart stopped in that moment. “Wow.” He exclaimed. “You look beautiful, Y/N.”       You rolled your eyes. “Right.” You went towards the door. “C’mon guys.” Conor laughed at his brother, who was still petrified at the sofa. “Close your mouth, Jack. You are flooding the apartment.”       Jack blinked, finally reacting. “Shut up, Conor.”       “I’m leaving you, Maynards, behind!” You announced.       “We waited ages for you to get ready.” Jack pointed out.       “That’s why you should be in here already.” You snapped back.       Conor chuckled at his brother again. Jack sassyness didn’t archieve you and the older one really enjoyed this fact.       “Oh, I’m sorry, Jack.” You said when you saw him pouting and gave him a hug. “I didn’t want to upset you.”       Jack wasn’t upset with you exactly. He was upset because, with only one sentence, you shushed him. The reason why he always needed to have the last word was the fact that he hated feeling taken down. How could you have such an influence in him? It wasn’t even a super smart answer you gave.       “He will never be upset with you, Y/N.” Conor teased.       “Yeah, of course.” You rolled your eyes again. The Maynard brothers were exceptionally silly in that night. As if Jack Maynard would have a crush on you.       “I couldn’t even if I try.” Jack commented, returning to his old self. The elevator’s doors opened.       You laughed. “Let’s go, boys.” You started walking to the building’s front door. “The Uber is already here.”       Jack shrugged his shoulders, giving Conor a side look. This one, for a change, was laughing at the situation of the youngest. “You better work harder at this one.”       “Thanks for the tip, brother.”       “Any time.” Conor winked and followed you, finally leaving the elevator. .       You yawned, supporting your head in Jack’s shoulder. I was another night, another club you went together.       “I’m tired.” You announced, feeling the car’s movements as if you were a baby being put in sleep.       “I can see that.” He giggled and passed an arm around you.       “What time is it?”       “About three.”       You sighed. “Oh, Jack, we are getting old. Before, we wouldn’t come home until the sun is up.”       “I guess.” He caressed your arm.       “The sun is up or go to a stranger’s house.”       Jack gave a little smirk. “Well, I’m not a stranger, but you can crash my house, Y/N.”       You laughed loudly. “Thanks, Jack.”

.

      Jack was chatting to a random pretty girl when he saw you going to the bar, crossing the dance floor.       “Excuse me for a moment.” Jack asked. “You want something from the bar? I think they gave me the wrong drink.”       The girl was confused, Jack was half way through the glass. “Yeah, of course.”       He smiled and walked away, hoping she would be there still when he returned.       “Hello!” You exclaimed, really happy, when you saw him. “Getting laid tonight, huh Maynard?”       He giggled. “Hey.”       Jack ordered a new drink to him and though it was good order something to the pretty girl he was talking to.       “Y/N.” Jack started talking what he wanted.       “Yes?”       “Come on…”       “What?”       “Andrew? Really?” He commented, referring to the guy you were flirting with. “You can do better than that.”       “Jack!” You exclaimed laughing. “He is cool, he is good looking… Not bad from my point of view.”       Your friend rolled his eyes. “He is here every bloody weekend, Y/N. It means something you know? He can’t even be at somewhere else because it’s not his field. He can’t play if it isn’t here.”       You laughed. “Oh my God, Jack! His field? So now you are making movements in his field? Because you’re definitely going home with that chick over there.” You raised an eyebrow.       “It is not the point, Y/N.”       “And how you know he’s here every weekend?”       “He is here every time we come.”       “So what?” You found everything genuinely funny. “It doesn’t mean a thing.”       “It says he is insecure, Y/N.” You rolled your eyes.       “I’m over you, Maynard. I’m going back to my boy over there. You should stop drinking. You sound just like Cosmopolitan article right now.”       “Is it a good thing?”       You shrugged your shoulders, smiling as you walked away.

.

      “I said to you.” Jack said on the Uber in the next week.       “Shut up.” You told. “Where is your brother anyway?”       “Getting drunk maybe?”       Maybe Jack was right, maybe the reason why Andrew was throwing outside the club you called him was that he wasn’t comfortable with the local, maybe you could see his insecurities written all over his face, maybe you were the one you told him that he could get a fresh air because he was turning pale… Maybe you were cursing Jack Maynard with all your strength.       Any way, it was really nice of Jack accompany you to Andrew’s house so you would be sure he was alright.       “It’s the next building.” You said to the Uber driver and he stopped the car.       “Come on, Jack.” You called as jumping out of the car.       “What?”       “The least I can do is paying you a meal. I know you didn’t had anything to dinner before the club. Something, I must add, really risky of you.” He smiled and shrugged. “Just living the life on the edge, you know me.” He joked while were slipping through the automobile’s bench.       You giggled. “Come on, just let me put something more comfortable than this tiny dress and we can go out.”       “You seem pretty fine to me wearing this tight thing you have going on.” Jack told you. “I actually enjoy that.”       “Shut up.”

.

      You were cracking up laughing at something not really that funny Jack said to you. You were so drunk you didn’t care about the sentences you thought were silly.       “Stop it, I need to pee!” You exclaimed.       You both were sitting on your living room’s floor, it was still the Andrew threw up night. You two had a few drinks went to dinner and already felt dizzy and, when you got home, you remembered you had some vodka from the last party you gave.       “You need to pee?” He asked, laughing as much as you.       “Yes, Jack! I have a bladder just as you do.” You informed as got up.       “Can I go with you?” He asked getting up too.       “To pee?” You found that weird.       “That doesn’t make sense, does it?”       “No, it doesn’t.”       “Fine, I will be waiting here.” He told you, nodding his head.       You were a couple steps away when you fell on the floor. Almost fell, actually. Jack caught you on the air.       “Someone is drunk!” You giggled.       “Yes, someone is.” Jack agreed, a little out of breath because your face was really close to his.       Your eyes met his and you lost the track of your thoughts. They were kind of diluted already because of the alcohol, but Jack’s blue eyes just made things even harder than they were.       “Jack…” Your heart was racing.       He swallowed dry. “Yes, Y/N?”       “Could you, please, kiss me?”       “Are you sure?” He confirmed, he wanted to guarantee you wouldn’t regret later. You were friends after all, right?       “Yes, I am.” You smiled. Jack could be really sweet if he wanted to. “Thanks for asking.” You said, drunk.       “You are welcome.” Was Jack’s sentence before kissing you.

→ Part 02

#buttercream squad #buttercream boys #buttercream gang #buttercreeam boy #buttercream squad imagine #jack maynard #jack maynard imagine #conor maynard #maynard brothers

[itselbaka]

Love is hard - Chapter eleven

Pairing: Madison Joseph x reader (friends), Josh Dun x reader (friends, lovers?), Tyler Joseph x reader (friends), Jenna Joseph x reader (friends), other Joseph and Dun family members

Plot: You take a leap year abroad, where you meet Madison Joseph. You become best friends and move in with her family. You meet her brother Tyler and his best friend Josh, who you have a crush on. Will Josh and you become more than friends?

This chapter: Chris and Kelly come back home and you meet Josh’s parents.

Warnings: Mentions of panic attacks

Word count: about 2600 (oops)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10

A/n: I hope you enjoy this chapter :D Love you all

“Back so soon? How was your date?” Maddie asked as soon as you walked inside. “It was great actually. We went ice skating and it was really fun and romantic.” You answered, eyes lighting up at the thought of the sweet kisses you shared with Josh. You sat down next to Maddie and started telling her about your date. She had her eyes fixated on the television and didn’t seem to really hear you, though. You remembered what Tyler had said to you about her needing some space and quickly stopped talking. “Anyway, your parents are coming home tomorrow so do you want to plan something? To welcome them back?” You swayed the conversation away. “I’m meeting up with Annie in the morning, but we can go for lunch somewhere if you want to? Just let me know where and I’ll meet you guys there.” Maddie replied. “Sure, sounds good.” You watched part of the movie along with Maddie, but you weren’t really interested and soon went off to sleep.

You had set your alarm early the next day. Though the house was pretty neat, you wanted to clean a little and get ready for when Chris and Kelly would arrive home. At 11, the house was completely cleaned and you got yourself ready as well, so you sat on the couch watching some television and waiting. You heard a car pull up on the driveway and walked to the door. “Hey Y/n. How are you?” Jenna said walking over to you. Tyler followed right behind her and they both hugged you. “We thought it might be nice to have lunch together, with my parents being back home and all.” Tyler said. “Maddie and I already planned that actually, but your very welcome to join us! They should be here any minute.” You replied, truly happy Tyler and Jenna were there. You all sat on the couch and chatted. “So, did you talk to Maddie? About… you know.” Tyler softly asked you when Jenna excused herself to go to the bathroom. “No. I think I’m just gonna let this rest for a while, it’ll figure itself out.” You replied. Tyler nodded while you heard another car approaching. “That must be them.” You said as you walked to the door. “Hey guys! Wow, quite the welcoming.” Kelly laughed as she spotted the three of you on the porch.

Chris and Kelly had put their stuff inside, freshened up and liked the idea of going out to lunch together, so you got in the car and drove to a small bistro they liked. You texted Maddie where you were going and she arrived shortly after you did. “Before I forget; Josh’s parents are in town, so he asked me to invite you all for dinner tonight.” Tyler announced midway through the meal. “Great, it would be nice to catch up with them!” Kelly replied happily, Chris nodded and smiled. You weren’t sure if Tyler meant that you were invited as well. It sounded like it, and frankly it would be a little weird if everyone would go except for you, but Josh could’ve invited you yesterday and didn’t. “I’m looking forward to it. It’ll be like old times, just our two families together. I was really excited when I got invited a couple of days ago.” Maddie said, smiling sweetly. You couldn’t help but feel personally attacked by her comment, but shook that thought away thinking she probably didn’t mean it that way. “Don’t be nervous about tonight. Only ‘the kids’ know you and Josh are dating and we won’t say anything. Just think of them as a friend’s parents. No pressure.” Jenna leaned over and said to you, misinterpreting your silence. “Thanks, Jen. I’ll be okay, don’t worry.” You reassured her, feeling an other worry coming up. Even if they don’t know we’re dating, I still have to give of a good impression. If they don’t like me and things do work out with Josh, it’ll be hard to change their minds. O God, what if they hate me? You felt your mind, once again, start to race. You tried to concentrate on the conversation and stop thinking about all the other stuff, but it only worked a little.

Once you were back home you immediately went upstairs to review your outfit options. You wanted to look like the perfect daughter-in-law to be; decent and classy, but with a hint of sexiness. The first three outfits were okay, but too overdressed for just a dinner with ‘the parents of friends’.  Just as you were assembling a fourth look, Maddie walked in the bedroom. “Whatcha doing?” She asked, looking up from her phone. “Just trying to figure out what to wear tonight. What are you wearing?” You replied, sounding calm. In fact, you were freaking yourself out more and more as time progressed, most likely putting more pressure on the night than necessary. “Just some jeans and a shirt, nothing special.” Maddie answered, grabbing some clothes from her closet and disappearing to the bathroom. Ok, don’t overdress, just jeans and a shirt you told yourself as you peered in your wardrobe. After a couple of hours, Kelly knocked at the bathroom door. “Ready? We’re leaving in five minutes.” She said. Feeling another rush of nervousness you checked your outfit, make-up and hair one last time. You had tried on seven outfits in total, but ultimately chose to wear your skinny light blue jeans, a dark green long-sleeved top, a bright yellow scarf and matching yellow converse shoes. You had put on light make-up and put your hair in a loose braid. You thought you looked neat and decent, but still casual, though you basically looked the same as always. You sprayed on a bit of perfume and rushed downstairs. Chris and Maddie were already half way to the car while Kelly waited for you at the door. You noticed she wore a long black dress and had her hair down in light curls and looked outside to check on the other’s outfits. Chris wore a navy blue suit and Maddie had a beautiful deep red flowy skirt on, with a black lace top. “I didn’t realize we were supposed to dress up.” You said to Kelly, almost choking on your words. “I thought Madison would tell you. It doesn’t matter, really. It’s just a long running private joke between us and the Dun’s. You look nice.” Kelly replied, locking the door and leading you to the car.

Your nerves were worsening the closer you got to the Dun’s house. Maddie didn’t speak with you in the car and you tried to ignore the feeling of betrayal, though you refused to believe she’d trick you on purpose. Maybe she forgot about the ‘joke’ and only realized after telling me what she’d wear you thought. When Chris parked the car in front of a light brown house, you suddenly felt nauseous. It was going to be the first time at Josh’s house; you weren’t sure of your relationship status with Josh; you’d meet his parents; you looked like the Joseph’s just picked you up from the street, compared to them. O God. You concentrated on your breathing as you followed the others to the door, attempting to avoid a total panic attack. Chris rang the bell and it only took seconds before the door opened. “Chris! Kelly! Madison! It’s so good to see you!” The woman enthusiastically said, hugging the three Joseph’s and welcoming them inside. “And you must be Y/n! Ashley told me about you. I’m Laura. Please, come in.” Laura said. She wore a long, light grey dress, obviously in on this ‘joke’ between the families. You followed the group into the dining room, seeing Tyler, Jenna, Jay, Ashley, Josh and a man, who must be Josh’s father, all dressed up in suits or dresses. You uncomfortable stood in the doorway not sure how to behave and what to do, focussing solely on calming yourself down. “Ah, you must be Y/n. Nice to meet you, I’m William, but you can call me Bill.” Bill came over to you, shaking your hand and smiling genuinely. “No dress, eh? I guess they haven’t told you about that yet.” He said chuckling. You greeted and hugged Ty, Jen, Jay and Ash and walked over to Josh. Neither of you dared to look the other in the eyes and you awkwardly hugged before quickly sitting down. Laura poured everyone a drink and served the first course, a tasty pumpkin soup. You sat between Maddie and Laura, Jay sat across from you. The parents talked among each other, Ashley and Jenna chatted sitting at the end of the table, Maddie was involved in a conversation with Josh and Tyler spoke with his brother, leaving you to eat your soup in silence. Feeling more of an outsider than ever, wedged between two people, you felt your heart beating faster and your body heating up. Only this time it wasn’t because you felt happy or in love, you knew it was because you were panicking. Your hands began to shake a little and your breathing became heavier. You looked around the table with distressed eyes, but nobody noticed you. You tried remembering the breathing techniques you once learned, but your mind didn’t seem to listen to you. You felt another rush of nausea coming up and you could feel the first drops of sweat form on your forehead. I have to get out of here you thought. You appeared calm, or so you thought, as you stood up as slowly as you could and excused yourself, mumbling something about the bathroom. Kelly nodded at you swiftly before returning to her conversation.

You opened several doors before locating the bathroom, locking the door and sitting on the floor, trying to control your breath. You held your hands under the cold water for a moment and wiped the sweat of your face, slowly but surely regaining your composure. You needed some fresh air but didn’t dare leave the house without asking or telling anyone. You thought about saying you felt sick so you could go home, but you really wanted to impress Josh’s parents tonight. So, after ten minutes, you managed to calm yourself down a little and went back to the dining room, determined to make a near perfect impression on Laura and Bill. “Are you okay honey? You look a little pale.” Laura asked you as she passed you in the doorway. “Yes, I’m fine. Just a little tired I think.” She nodded and took the plates to the kitchen, replacing them with plates of turkey and mashed potatoes. You sat down again, feeling queasy. Bill had switched places with Laura, sitting next to you. He started chatting with you, about his job and his kids and asking you about your plans for the future. You talked to him during the main course, feeling a little more at ease and secretly thankful he provided some distraction. “I hope you all had enough to eat and liked it.” Laura said when everyone was done eating. “Let’s go to the lounge for coffee.” Everyone stood up and made their way to the lounge and you followed closely behind. You sat in a big chair near the corner of the room and watched the others as they sat down and kept talking with each other. They, unconsciously, seemed to form two groups as they sat. The parents were joined by Maddie on the huge sofa across from you, while the boys, Ashley and Jenna sat down on the other big sofa near the entrance. You saw Maddie laughing loudly with Bill and Laura, who obviously liked her a lot. You wished you had chosen a different seat so you could be included in one of the groups. Suddenly unsure if anyone in the room even wanted you to be there, you didn’t risk trying to move seats and stayed on your own.

You weren’t sure if it was the warmth in the room, the fact that nobody talked to you, that you were still nervous or all of them together, but without warning you could feel the next panic attack coming. You needed fresh air and you needed it now. Rushing across the room you left towards the patio doors you saw on your way to the lounge. Thankfully they weren’t locked and you almost ran onto the lawn, quickly checking if you were visible from the lounge. You spotted a small bench to your right and sat down in the dark, still breathing heavily. “Are you okay?” You heard Josh’s voice next to you soon after you sat down. “Yes, sure. I think I’m getting the flu or something.” You tried to smile, not wanting to show Josh how you really felt. He sat down next to you, softly rubbing your back. You sat in silence for a while, Josh staring at you. “I remember when we first started playing big shows. There were so many people there, staring at us, at me. At first I was happy all those people came to see us. But then, I would get really nervous. I would be nauseous all day and some days, I didn’t even want to go on. I would lie awake night after night worrying and my mind played tricks on me. Tyler noticed, of course, and helped me a lot. I talked about it and worked on it and even though I still get nervous sometimes, I can manage it and find my calm spot.” Josh suddenly told you, his voice sounding soft and sweet. You nodded, feeling he understood what was going on. You slowly calmed down again while Josh talked to you about trivial things, to get your mind off whatever was going on. “Let’s get inside and have some coffee, okay?” He finally asked when you’d calmed down. You smiled and nodded, following him inside. You were sure everyone noticed you coming back in together, but thankfully no one said anything about your disappearance or entrance. You sat next to Josh on the big sofa and felt relieved as you chatted along with the group. Having a good time, at last, two hours passed by quickly and Chris and Kelly announced they were leaving soon. You hugged Jenna, Ashley, Jay and Tyler and gave an extra-long hug to Josh, whispering a quick but heartfelt thank you in his ear. You shook hands with Laura and Bill, thanking them for the lovely dinner. You were the last one to reach the car and as soon as you sat down, you realized you had forgotten your bag.

You ran back to the front door, reaching it just as Tyler, Jenna and Jay were about to leave. “I’ve left my bag.” You explained. Josh smiled. “I think my mom found it. She’s in the kitchen, go ask her.” You walked towards the kitchen, faintly hearing the voices of Laura and Bill. You reached the door, but before you could open it, you heard Laura mention your name inside. Curiosity getting the best of you, you stood as quiet as possible, trying to hear what they were saying. “I know, Bill. I’m just saying that I think she acted a little bit weird tonight. And the way she dressed!” You heard Laura say. “And she doesn’t seem to have any plans for the future.” Bill added. “Exactly. Well, let’s just hope Josh and Ashley don’t get too involved with her. She’s hardly a good example for anyone.” Laura continued. A small part of you hoped they weren’t talking about you, but when you knocked on the door and saw their faces as you entered, you knew it was you they were speaking about. So far for making a good impression.

#josh dun x reader #josh dun imagine #josh dun fanfiction #josh dun #twenty one pilots imagine #tyler joseph #twenty one pilots #madison joseph

[inbl0om]

2016 in review

Hey followers, it’s that time of year again! Aka, the year is about over and I write a diary-entry-like text post about how the past 36[6, in this case] days have been for me. Which none of you will probably read. Oh well. Here goes:

Part I: January - Late May I returned to Fordham in the middle of January for my final semester at Fordham. Things were...hard for me to verbalize. A month before, December 2015, I overcame a brief scuffle I had with a few of my friends due to how belligerently drunk I got the night after my first LSAT. Things evened out, but I left LA after the new year with a very troubled heart. I kept asking myself, what would I do if I didn’t get accepted to any of the law schools that I applied to? I had no back-up plan. Ok, that’s a lie; I did: work for a year or so, then go back to school to get my MBA. But I made no effort to apply to any jobs in either city that I called “home.” And that’s another thing: the word “home” began to have many different connotations. So many that I began to hate the English language (for more than the obvious reasons) for having no other word(s) to express exactly how I was feeling. Every party I went to, every living room I pregamed in, every nap I took on Fordham’s quad (”Eddie’s” for all my Fordham followers)--just made me want to cling to New York City even more. College seniors everywhere dread “the ‘G’ word,” but there is no way to explain the disdain “graduation” inflicts on one’s mind and body when the second semester finally rolls around. If anything, the second semester--and every inching second towards the occurrence of the “g word”--makes you really pause the commotion of your life and smell the roses that are the life you made for yourself the past four years.

I met a boy in January on the MetroNorth. He was sweet--almost too sweet. I became too desperate for his attention that I scared him away. Pretty Typical. In February, I retook the LSAT. Then, on the 17th, I turned 22. Once again, I had a birthday party, but I was sad to see that not as many people came as did for my 21st. I also went on my first-ever Tinder date. In March, I came home to Los Angeles for Spring Break. I went to San Diego with a few friends from high school and let myself feel healed by the ocean. In April, I got my first law school acceptance. My fate was sealed. I placed my enrollment deposit and began to come to terms with the certainty that I was, in fact, going to leave New York City for good and return to Los Angeles. I was so happy. And I was so sad. My closest friends were all so ecstatic for my future (and I could tell because that Facebook status was my most-liked EVER at an astounding 180+), yet we all knew what it meant: I was leaving. I was going to be gone.

May was both wonderful and terrible for that reason. My job and my internship both ended, and I focused mainly on my remaining days in New York City. My roommate and I decided to have a “Purple Party” to celebrate that we were both going to graduate schools that just so happened to have the same official color: purple. Mutual friends of ours who lived in a house with a huge backyard let us throw it. Over 200 of our friends came. And at one moment, I actually almost cried. I almost cried because all of these people--who I had either been friends with all four years, had met them along the way, or had just met them that semester--were there for me. Followers, it’s no secret that I suffer from depression and anxiety. I have always had self-esteem issues, as well as abandonment issues and fears that I am never enough. But that night, in that moment, I felt loved. Senior Week commenced later that May. I can’t remember most of the events, but I remember them being fun for many reasons. One night I lay on Eddie’s with my other roommate and we looked at the stars and were holding each other in tears because of how thankful we were that we met each other. Another night, one of my best friends and I finally got around to talking about the reality that was me leaving soon. My brother flew in early (and stayed with his best friend from high school who just happens to go to my Alma Mater) and went to Senior Ball. Senior Ball was amazingly fun...until the after party. Ugh. So much unnecessary drama. But anyway, graduation finally happened. Graduation was surreal. The weather was cloudy, it was somewhat humid, my sister didn’t make it because she missed her flight because she chose her (now ex-)boyfriend’s prom over me, our speaker basically told us that the world is a very terrible place, and seeing AJ get his diploma made me happy that I finally got to say goodbye to him. But honestly, I still can’t believe that it happened. And I don’t think I even know where my diploma is. Oops. Anyway, I’m bummed that I didn’t get to take as many pictures with as many people as I wanted. And I’m still a little bummed that I spent too much time with my family doing all these touristy things. But after my mom and my sisters left, I had two days left in New York City. My last day was really, really hard. May 24th. I won’t forget it. I woke up that morning seeing my bags packed and my bed bare. My walls, which I am notoriously known by my friends for as being the most filled, were blank. I went to lunch with my best friends and tried not to cry the entire time. Afterward, we went to my apartment. In the two hours before my scheduled Uber was to pick me up, my friends helped me take down all the photos that I had taped on the walls. We laughed as we reminisced all the crazy moments that I had captured of our countless shenanigans. Some of my friends asked if they could keep certain photos because they realized in that moment how sentimental it was to them. And then finally, the uber came. I hugged each and every person of my squad. And then when I hugged my main girls--Darby, Alex, and Emma--I lost it. I hugged Darby the longest. But honestly, it’s probably more correct to say that she held me. I finally got the strength to get in the car...and as I drove off, not only did my friends wave, a few of them actually ran after the car. My heart broke into a million pieces. But then it swelled in joy. Never had I ever felt love like this. This love is accepting, this love is patient, this love knows who I am and wants to grow with me. Even with so much distance that I had now created between us. And my brother and I proceeded to get super drunk on the plane back to Los Angeles afterward.

Part II: Late May - Late August The best way to sum up my summer in 2016 is this: I was super fucking depressed. I was mourning my old life. At this point a year prior, I was starting my job in the Admissions Office, I had just moved in to my off-campus apartment, and I was spending every afternoon and night with my best friends either in their living rooms, their backyards, or via drunken shenanigans in Manhattan and Brooklyn. But this year? I was locked in my room watching Netflix and Hulu. Sure, I was very happy to be with my family, and I was happy that I got to spend a lot more time with my friends from high school that decided to move back to LA like I did. But something was missing. I felt empty. I felt lonely. And I felt my heart break even more when I saw via Facebook and Snapchat that my friends from Fordham seemed to have moved on with their lives and had accepted that I was no longer a part of it. I had a depressive breakdown in early July, a little after the fourth. I ripped the pictures of my college friends off my walls and threw many framed pictures I had on the ground, where they shattered. I screamed, cried, and wrote FAT and WORTHLESS all over my body in sharpie. Then, about two weeks later, I went to the hospital because I was self-harming. I had not been suicidal to this degree since AJ broke up with me about a year and a half beforehand.

Then, in late July, two good things happened to me: (1) I started watching Haikyuu!! and (2) I began to take my Intro to Legal Writing class at my current law school. What I liked about my into to legal writing course is that, not only was it super preparatory for my starting career as a law student, I also met many people who I am still friends with--including Aileen, who has become my best friend at law school. Similarly, what I liked about (and still love about) Haikyuu!! is--put simply--it helped me fill a hole that I was feeling. Through the Karasuno Volleyball Club team, I was able to find a fictional psuedo-family while I was looking for ways to create a new one for myself in law school. I also briefly dated a guy I met on Bumble. That was okay, but ended pretty early on. It was nice to know that even LA boys wanted me. And on that note--I also finally came to terms with my sexuality and came out to my family. The summer ended a little early for me because of orientation, but I’m happy that it did. After having a few crying fits wondering whether law school was what I was actually meant to be doing with my life, I was finally ready to attack head-on.

Part III: Late August - December The only thing I really got from orientation was new friends. And honestly, close to 85% of the people I met that first week are still my friends now that the semester is over. These people (Aileen, Josh, Maddy, Michael, Alex, and Joanna) are the main persons who kept me sane. Followers, law school is like nothing I have ever--or will ever--experience. The reading is literally only case opinions, class time is spent trying to affirm what you taught yourself, and your grade in the class is (almost always) determined by the final and maybe a midterm. You have you teach yourself most of it. Your professor is only there to help clear up any questions you have on the rules, their elements, and/or their factors. The most difficult part is teaching yourself the application the rules, because some rules are very broad, and others are super narrow. But once you get the gist of determining which rule falls where, everything else begins to fall into place. Labor Day Weekend was spent in Lake Arrowhead with these new friends. Followers, I haven’t seen that many stars in years. I made a few wishes on three (!!!) of the four shooting stars I saw, and I actually had a panic attack. But!! these new friends were actually super supportive and patient. I guess those are just a few perks of having friends who are older than you.

I actually flew to New York City for Fordham’s homecoming at the end of September! And let me tell you, there were waterworks. The first day, I went to breakfast with my old roommate and another close friend in Brooklyn, and my old roommate and I just about cried when we were reunited after she ran down the stairs to greet me from the uber. My old roommate and I went into Manhattan and ran errands before meeting with my other old roommate, Darby, and our other friend Ben for dinner. And once again, Darby held me while I cried. I was just so happy. There are so many posts on my tumblr in which I attempt to describe how warm, welcome, and loved that these people make me feel. We had a wonderful midtown dinner at an Italian restaurant with live music before heading down to the Village to go out. I got to meet some of Alex’s new friends at her grad school (which was a nice touch because she had taken me on a tour of her portion of the NYU campus earlier that day). We had a pretty lovely rest of a rainy night before going back to our borroughs to sleep. The next morning, Katie arrived, I got to eat NYC-style bagels that I missed oh-so-much, and we went to Homecoming. Homecoming was great because I got to see so many friends that I didn’t even realized I missed. We got drunk under the tent, went to a backyard party, and got pizza at the local spot afterward. And then, at night, a smaller group of us went to the old house of mutual friends that had younger mutual friends living there now. That’s when it hit me: things have changed. No part of my old life is how it used to be. Sure, these friendships will be maintained, and New York City will always be a part of me/have a piece of me--but the illusion that life as it was had not budged since graduation was immediately busted. I left the next day. With tears. But I know I’ll be back.

Anyway, the rest of the semester went by pretty smoothly. I briefly dated a guy I met on Bumble, but it turns out he just wanted me for sex. Whatever--he and his incredibly small penis can go fuck themselves. And then, there was another guy who I actually and genuinely thought liked me at my law school. But like Bumble fuckboy, he only wanted me for sex. He started to spread a rumor that I had assaulted him, which I quickly was able to shut down due to how completely false his accusations were. The good news: I was given a newborn hatchling tortoise!! Little Takala fully hatched on October 4. The little ooo came home to me on October 18, and my life has been exponentially better ever since. I have never understood the hype surrounding pets until I started to care for Lil T. I love that tiny animal more than I love myself. Academically, I hit a bit of a rough patch. I received a very low score, despite a gracious curve, on my first ever midterm exam. This trend continued with other midterms I took. But when December 1 hit, I decided to buckle down and redeem myself. There was no way in hell that I am not going to be at the top. The semester ended on December 21. My friends and I all went out and had a pretty crazy afternoon and night. I came to many realizations about my law school friends, such as who lies about their grades, who cheats, who steals outlines, and even things like who is manipulative and who is most likely going to be at the top or bottom of the class.

If 2016 taught me anything, it’s this: change is constant, and change is difficult. I left many friends and memories--a life--back in New York City; and I created a new life for myself in Los Angeles--aka the city that I was born in and grew up in. 2016 also taught me how to be resilient, how to stay true to myself, and how to both open up about these emotions and to also be a better listener. 2016 was better than 2015 in that I was able to do so many cool things with my friends (both old and new), but it was also worse than 2015 in that all these changes all at once made me very depressed in such a way that was completely different from the depression I felt in 2015.

Hopes for 2017 But anyway, I have a pretty good feeling for 2017. Because my birthday is on the 17th day of February, I have always considered 17 to be “lucky” for me. So, I hope that this year will be good to me. I hope that I can reach my goal weight, to live a healthier lifestyle, to be more receptive to change, to keep getting what I deserve (as in, have the fruits of my labors be from my effort rather than luck)--and, ultimately, to let my anxiety calm the fuck down and actually let life and the universe allow things to fall into place for me without me trying to move too fast or without me trying to unfairly manipulate things into my favor. So, I hope that 2017 will be better than 2016. No--I know 2017 will be better than 2016. Watch out, universe. I’m gonna slay.

#personal #my 2016 #2016 in review #year in review #2016

[blurry-fics]

I’ll Always Have Your Back

Characters: sibling!Tyler Joseph, family friend!Josh Dun

Warnings: Blood, mentions of violence & bullying, description of injury (not very graphic), profanity, general angst

Word Count: 3213

Request: Can I get a Tyler sister fic where something happened (idk what) but josh( basically your other brother) saved you from it and you try to pretend it didn’t happen then Tyler finds out and angst and sibling fluff at the end please -Anonymous

Author’s Note: This is also a highschool!AU. I considered breaking this up into two parts, but didn’t want to make you wait a week for part two, so instead you get a super long one shot this week! I hope you enjoy it :) (picture credit)

You winced as you brought a hand to your cheek, gently feeling around for the source of the pain. Your fingers eventually met raw skin, sending a new jolt of pain through your face. When you pulled your fingers back, there was blood smeared on your fingertips.

You bit back a sob as you pulled your knees to your chest, revealing a number of new sore spots. Echoes of the insults the girls had thrown at you rattled around your mind, sending a fresh wave of tears down your cheeks, making the scratches sting more. Your stuff was still scattered across the pavement, now mostly crumpled or ripped. At least the wind had died down from earlier in the day, you didn’t have the energy to chase your homework around the field.

“Y/N! Y/N!”

Your head flicked up, looking for the source of the noise. Already, you were scrambling to a standing position and looking for somewhere to hide in case the girls had decided to come back for a second round. The scratches and bruises they had already given you were going to be hard enough to explain to your family as it was.

The figure rounded the corner before you had a chance to find a spot to hide. His mess of brown hair was a welcome sight and you nearly collapsed from relief. He came running towards you as soon as he spotted you standing in the middle of all your strewn papers.

“Y/N, there you are,” he huffed, reaching forward to grab your arms. “I heard some girls talking about beating someone up and thought I caught the end of your name. Are you ok? Is that blood on your cheek?”

You nodded sheepishly, looking up at him so that he could see the scratches on your face. He was the only one you had told about the girls who had been tormenting you for the last few months, mostly because he was the only one you trusted enough to not escalate the problem.

“What happened?”

“I-It was those girls. I was walking home and I had headphones in so I didn’t hear them coming a-and they cornered me and beat me up,” you choked out between sobs. “I couldn’t do anything, Josh. I was terrified so I just laid there and- I can’t go to school tomorrow. Not after this.”

“Hey, come here.”

Josh pulled you into his chest. You wrapped your arms around his middle, allowing your body to relax completely for the first time all day. It was safe as long as he was around, Josh would be able to protect you.

“Do you need anything?” he asked.

“I just want to go home.”

“I’ll drive you.”

Together, you and Josh gathered up all your school stuff and put it back into your backpack. Josh offered to carry it for you and used his free arm to wrap around your shoulders. You were glad he did it, though you would never say that out loud. It made you feel protected.

“Let me move the stuff out of the front seat, hold on.”

You glanced around the parking lot while Josh leaned over the driver’s side and tossed his own bag and jacket out of the way so that you could sit. As soon as the stuff was out of the way, you slid into the car and locked the door behind you. Even with Josh next to you, you weren’t running any risks.

“Go ahead and pick whatever music you want to listen to. There should also be some napkins in there, if you want to get the blood off your face.”

“Thanks, Josh.”

He nodded and pulled out of the parking lot. You grabbed a napkin out of the glovebox and pulled down the visor so that you could use the little mirror to clean your face. It also provided you with the first clear look at your face. A couple bruises were already beginning to form where you had been hit, right around your eye and cheekbone. Thankfully, you had been able to get your arms up to cover your face before they landed too many hits, but it hadn’t been enough to stop you from scraping up your cheek when they pushed you to the pavement.

“This is going to be impossible to explain to my family,” you sighed, lightly dabbing at a couple beads of blood on your cheek.

“Why don’t you tell them the truth?”

“Are you kidding? My mom would flip and call the school and that won’t do anything aside from making the entire situation worse.”

“You can always transfer. Or do online school. You can’t keep letting yourself get beat up like this, Y/N. It’s dangerous. You need to put a stop to it before it escalates more.”

“You think I don’t know that?” you snapped, flipping the visor back up. “It’s not like I want to practically sprint home every day to avoid getting verbally assaulted or beat up.”

“Why don’t you wait at Tyler’s basketball practices?”

“Tyler said the coach wouldn’t let me. Besides, what’s to stop the girls from showing up at practices?”

“There’s people there.”

“There’s people walking home, too.”

“Then let me drive you home every day,” Josh suggested.

“It’s out of the way for you.”

“I would rather drive a little extra every day than learn you’re in the hospital because some girls decided to take things a little too far. You’re like a sister to me too, you know.”

“Maybe,” you shrugged, leaning forward to grab Josh’s CD case. “I’ll just keep a better eye out next time and not wear headphones.”

“Y/N…”

“I’m done talking about this,” you said, never letting your eyes leave the CDs.

“Ok.”

You eventually found something you wanted to listen to and slid it into Josh’s radio. It made familiar mechanical clicking sounds before the CD started to play.

“Good choice.”

“Thanks,” you said, zipping the case back up and stuffing it into Josh’s messy glovebox. “Hey, why were you at school late today, anyway?”

“I had to talk to one of my teachers about a project. I was about to leave when I saw those girls hightailing it out from behind the school, so I nonchalantly walked past them, heard your name and them talking about beating someone up, and then came running.”

“Oh, well, thank you. I don’t know what I would have done if you hadn’t come and gotten me.”

“I’m always going to look out for you, Y/N. And I know Tyler would do the same.”

“Right.”

The rest of the car ride, which was hardly more than a few minutes, was quiet. Once Josh pulled up outside your house, you twisted back - a bit uncomfortably, you might add - to grab your backpack and pull your house keys out of it. Your siblings, aside from Tyler, would most likely already be home, but it was your goal to get inside and upstairs without being seen by any of them.

“Thanks for giving me a ride home, Josh,” you said, already halfway out the door.

“No problem. And hey, Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“Please talk to Tyler about what happened.”

“Ok,” you answered, knowing it was the only way to get him off your case.

“It’s going to be fine.”

“I know.”

Josh smiled as you closed the door and walked inside. He waited until you had opened the front door before driving off, just to make sure you got inside safe. 

Your entire body tensed as you stood just inside the door, not quite closing it yet. You listened carefully, trying to figure out where exactly each member of your family was in the house. From the sounds of it, Maddy was sitting at the kitchen table doing homework and your brothers were up in the den playing video games, like usual. You closed the door, making sure to lock it behind you, and then ran upstairs and directly into the bathroom.

“Hello?” Zack called.

“Hey, Zack!” you answered, glancing at the door to make sure it was locked.

“Oh, it’s you, Y/N! I didn’t know what was happening because I heard the door close and then someone went sprinting up the stairs.”

“It was just me! I drank a ton of water during last period and had to pee really bad,” you said, hoping it was a convincing lie.

“You’re home late!”

“I ran into Josh after school and we talked for awhile! He gave me a ride home, too.”

“Ok!”

You waited to see if Zack would say anything else, but you only heard their video games start back up again. Your shoulders dropped a little and you immediately opened the medicine cabinet, grabbing at whatever supplies you thought you might need. By the time you were done, you had a small assortment of tools on the counter in front of you to deal with your injuries.

You lost track of how long you were in the bathroom, pouring peroxide onto your cuts and examining your body for new bruises. Eventually, everything that needed to be attended to was and all of the supplies were back in the cabinet, sitting exactly as you had found them. You pulled your dirty shirt back on, grabbed your backpack, and quickly shuffled out of the bathroom and down the hall to your room.

Once in the safety of your room, you once again stripped out of your clothes and pulled on an oversized sweatshirt that you had stolen from one of your brothers. It hung well past your hands and the hood was oversized, making it harder to get a clear look at your face. You would have to cover the marks with concealer before you were called downstairs for dinner, but you wanted to try and get some of the swelling down before you did that. Your torn jeans were also traded out for a pair of comfy leggings that were less stiff when you tried to move around in them. The dirty clothes ended up stuffed in the back of your closet where your mom wouldn’t accidentally end up finding them

You were halfway out of your room to make your quick trip to the kitchen when you heard the front door open. Whoever it was dropped a ton of stuff next to the stairs with a thud and swung the front door closed. It was loud, making you jump a little.

“I’m home!” they called.

Tyler.

You immediately dove back into your room and shut the door before he could come upstairs. He would know something was up immediately and start asking a million questions, all of which you wouldn’t want to answer. Thankfully, after a short stop in his room, you heard him walk into the bathroom and start up the shower. You took this as your opportunity to run downstairs and grab a bag of frozen peas from the freezer.

“What are you doing?” Maddy asked. You had almost forgotten she was at the kitchen table.

“Getting a snack,” you said, pulling your hood a little further over your face as you looked for the peas.

“From the freezer?”

“Mmmhmm.”

“That’s weird.”

“I was just seeing what my options were.”

You quickly glanced at Maddy to see if she was still looking at you. She had turned back to her homework, so you grabbed the peas and stuffed them into the pocket of your sweatshirt where they would be less visible. For added effect, you walked over to the snack cupboard and grabbed a packet of goldfish.

You walked as fast as you could without arousing suspicion all the way back to your room and shut the door again. The packet of peas was a relief on your swollen cheek, if not a bit cold. Not wanting to keep your arm up to hold the vegetables on your cheek, you walked over to your bed and leaned back so that gravity would keep them in place.

You were scrolling through Tumblr, trying your best to ignore the combination of physical and psychological discomfort from your day, when there was a knock on your door. Panic flooded through you and you immediately rolled onto your side with your back to the door, hiding your face from the view of whoever had come to see you.

“What?” you asked, trying your best to sound annoyed.

“Can I come in?” Tyler asked.

“Why?”

“I need to talk to you about something.”

You didn’t like the sound of that.

“About what?”

“I don’t know, but Josh told me I should come talk to you once I got home.”

“Dammit,” you muttered. “No, you can’t come in.”

“Why not?” Tyler asked. His tone had become more defensive.

“Because I said so.”

“Alright, you leave me no choice.”

You sat up at the sound of your door opening, temporarily forgetting why you had tried to stop him in the first place. Tyler closed the door behind him and turned to face you; what little happiness he had on his face was gone in an instant. As soon as you realized why he was making that face, you scrambled to cover your injuries with your hand, as if it would do anything.

“Who did that to you?”

“Nobody. I fell.”

“Don’t bullshit me, Y/N, I’ve fallen and been shoved and tossed around in basketball and I’ve never had an injury that bad. Someone deliberately did that to you.”

“No, they didn’t. I fell on the pavement when I was walking home. It isn’t a big deal.”

Tyler crossed the room and grabbed your wrist, pulling it away from your face. You knew there was no point in fighting him, wrestling matches from your childhood taught you that Tyler could move your arm if he really wanted to. You might as well give in while his touch was still semi-gentle.

“I’m not going to ask again: who did this to you?”

“Just some girls in my grade,” you said, unable to meet his eyes. “Ty, I swear it isn’t a big deal.”

“Isn’t a big deal? Y/N, you have a black eye coming in and scrapes all across your cheek, and that’s just what’s visible. They attacked you. This is a huge deal.”

“I don’t want it to be,” you said, already feeling the tears coming. “I just want to be left alone. That’s all.”

“Hey, hold on.” Tyler bent down so that he could make eye contact with you. “Listen, I’m not going to contact anyone about this if you don’t want me to, but we need to figure out how to stop this. I won’t sit idly by while people beat you up.”

You wrenched your arm out of Tyler’s grasp and buried your face in your hands. They were shaking from the effort of holding in sobs so as to not alert the rest of your family that something serious was going on.

“I just want it to stop, Ty,” you repeated. “I want it all to stop.”

Tyler stood up and took a seat on the edge of your bed next to you. Carefully, he scooted closer and wrapped an arm around you.

“Is that ok?”

“Can you move your hand down a little? You’re on a bruise.”

Tyler did as you asked, once again checking that it was ok. You nodded.

“Can you run me through what happened?” His tone had become gentle again.

You carefully described what had happened to Tyler, from leaving school to Josh finding you and taking you home. It took awhile because you kept pausing to take deep breaths and calm yourself down enough to keep talking, but you eventually made it through the entirety of the story. Tyler held you close the whole time, waiting patiently whenever you needed a break.

“This isn’t the first time they’ve been mean to you?”

“It was the first time they got physical, but they’ve had it out for me since the beginning of the year.”

“Do you know why?”

“They just think I’m weird,” you shrugged.

“What?”

“They think I’m weird. I don’t know why.”

“Well, you’re not weird, Y/N. In fact, you’re one of the coolest people that I know and I’m glad you’re my sister. We’re going to get something figured out about this whole situation, ok?”

“I’ll talk to Mom and Dad about it soon. I just don’t want them to contact the school and make things worse.”

“I’ll back you up and make sure they don’t.”

“Also how am I going to explain this?” you asked, gesturing to the bruises that were still on your face.

That reminded you to grab your bag of peas and hold it to your face again. Tyler laughed a little as you did so.

“Easy. We were playing basketball in the driveway and I threw the ball to you, but it hit your face and gave you a black eye.”

“And the scratches?”

“You fell when I was trying to get you inside to ice the bruise. It was a rough game for you,” he laughed.

“Way to make me sound like a klutz,” you joined his laughter, reaching out to shove at his shoulder.

“Hey, it’ll get Mom and Dad off your case.”

“I suppose.”

“And for real, Y/N, I’m going to look out for you, ok? Josh will too. If you ever need us at school because you’re worried something is going to happen, don’t hesitate to come find us. Neither of us want you to get hurt and we can both be intimidating.”

“Josh, maybe. I’m not so sure about you,” you giggled.

“Hey, I’m trying to be nice,” Tyler smiled, reaching forward and pulling you into his chest. One of his hands reached up to ruffle at your hair, though it was difficult for him when your head was covered by a hoodie. “Don’t ruin the moment.”

“Thanks, Tyler. It really does mean a lot. Josh said he can start giving me rides home when you have practice, so I think I might take him up on that offer.”

“Good idea.”

Tyler released you from his grip. You rolled your shoulders, stretching out a few places that were steadily growing more sore. 

“We have your back, Y/N. You aren’t going to deal with this alone.”

“I know. Sorry I took so long to tell you what was going on.”

“It’s ok.” He reached out and rested a hand on your back. “It’s hard to talk about, I get it.”

“Yeah.”

There was a slight pause as you both sat on your bed. Tyler was the first to break the silence.

“Mom needs those peas for dinner, you know.”

“Well I’m going to keep using them until she comes up here and demands them from me.”

“Good plan,” Tyler said sarcastically. “Now what do you say we go play some video games while you ice your eye?”

“I think that sounds like an actual good plan.”

Tyler held a hand out to you and helped you stand up. You fell into step with him and allowed yourself a small smile. It was a nice feeling, knowing that someone out there had your back.

#tyler joseph #tyler joseph x reader #tyler joseph fanfiction #twenty one pilots #twenty one pilots fanfiction #sibling!tyler #tw; blood #tw; violence #tw; injury #tw; bullying #tyler joseph imagine #tyler joseph drabble #twenty one pilots x reader #twenty one pilots imagine #twenty one pilots drabble #tyler joseph angst #josh dun #these tags are a mess #skeleton clique #blurry-fics #f!reader

[itselbaka]

Love is hard  - Chapter five

Pairing: Madison Joseph x reader (friends), Josh Dun x reader (friends, lovers?), Tyler Joseph x reader (friends), Jenna Joseph x reader (friends), other Joseph and Dun family members

Plot: You take a leap year abroad, where you meet Madison Joseph. You become best friends and move in with her family. You meet her brother Tyler and his best friend Josh, who you have a crush on. Will Josh and you become more than friends?

This chapter: You spend the day at the zoo with the group.

Warnings: None

Word count: about 2100

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

A/n: I’m so sorry it took me this long to put out a new part. I’ve been on a much needed holiday, but I’m back! I hope you enjoy this part. Thank you all!

You had spent the last couple of days at home, only leaving twice to go grocery shopping with Kelly. Thankfully, some days of rest had been good for your foot and ankle. Josh had texted you a few times asking how you were feeling and saying you should let him know when you were well enough for the day out to the zoo.

Y/n: I think my foot can handle a full fun zoo day! Name a day and time 

Josh: Great! Tomorrow, maybe? I’ll ask Ty, Jen and Ash, you ask Maddie, k?

Y/n: Maddie and I can go tomorrow.

Josh: The others too. Pick you up at 9am then?

Y/n: Sure, I’m looking forward to it! See you tomorrow

You stood in front of your closet, wondering what to wear. Clearly you wanted to look hot, but not like you tried to much. Since Maddie was already dressed, you knew she just wore jeans and a sweater and you didn’t want to overdress. Each time Josh had seen you, you looked like a mess. Finally, you settled on white ripped skinny jeans, a bright yellow off the shoulder sweater, a light brown scarf and comfy sneakers. You styled your hair, put on make-up and went downstairs for breakfast. “I don’t want to push you, but you should visit the campus soon, if you still want to enrol. The next schoolyear is starting sooner than you think” Chris said, talking to both Maddie and you. “We’ll go Monday. There’s no sense in going on the weekend since most people might not be there, so…” Maddie answered, looking at you for approval at the same time. “Sure, we’ll make a day out of it. Visit the campus, see the surroundings, dinner. O, he’s here!” You said when you heard a car pull up to the house, maybe sounding a little to exited. Maddie glanced at you, both of you grabbing your things.

“Good to see you again.” Josh greeted you, giving you a hug. “I know six people is a bit much for this car, but it’s only a short drive.” Jenna was behind the wheel, Tyler in the passenger’s seat. Ashley was already settled in the back while Maddie sat down to her left. You took the spot on Ashley’s right, awkwardly greeting her. “You’re gonna have to scoot over, I wanna come too!” Josh laughed, looking at you. With a red face you scooted over and Josh, smiling sheepishly, sat down next to you. “You look nice. I like your sweater.” Josh said to you while you muttered a thank you, sitting half on his lap. The rest of the ride you talked and listened to the others, trying to avoid looking at Josh since you were sure you’d do something stupid, like kiss him.

“Ok, are we just going to walk around or is there any animal in particular you want to visit first?” Tyler asked, looking around the group. “Let’s just walk around, we’ll see” Ashley answered, linking arms with you and walking off. You felt uncomfortable, especially since the only encounter with Ashley so far didn’t go well. “So, I’ve talked with Maddie and Jenna a little, and it seems like you’re a nice girl. And seeing you and Josh like to hang out, I feel it’s my duty to get to know you better.” Ashley stated, dragging you to the elephant house. “Tell me, what are your plans; short term and long term.” She asked, looking at you. “Well, uhm, well, short term; I was thinking of maybe applying to Ohio State. And uhm, after that, you know, work and stuff.” You stammered, already seeing Ashley’s face turn to disappointment. “Ok, so no real plans then. Any idea on what you want to study? Or are you just hoping to land some rich guy so you won’t have to figure out what to do with your life?!” Ashley said, glancing at Josh. You were hoping it was just a joke, but you really couldn’t tell. Before you could reply, Jenna came over. “I can’t stand the smell in here! Let’s keep moving, ok?” Grabbing both your and Ashley’s hand, she moved outside. Maddie linked arms with you on the other side, leaving the guys behind.

Looking over to them, you saw Josh and Tyler staring at you, quickly looking away when they saw you looking. They stayed behind for about ten minutes, still quietly talking when they came walking over. You had a feeling they might have talked about you, but at the same time you wouldn’t believe you were important enough to have a private talk about.

“Ooh! We must go to the reptile house now! You can meet and greet the snakes!” Maddie exclaimed. “Nice! Let’s go.” Josh and Tyler said, nearly running off with Maddie. “I’m sorry guys, but I have to pass. I’d rather have math homework every night for the rest of my life than go cosy up with snakes. I’ll go watch the meerkats and wait for you there.” You said, shivering with only the thought of snakes. You waved and walked over to the meerkat enclosure, sitting on a bench nearby. Only five minutes passed when someone sat next to you. “They are funny guys, aren’t they?” You looked up to the voice talking to you, seeing a handsome guy around your age, nodding in response to his question. “Are you here alone?” He asked. “No, I’m with friends. But since I didn’t feel the need to hug snakes, I’m waiting for them here.” You answered. “Yeah, I tagged along with my sister and niece. Not really interested in serpents either.” He laughed. “Are you from around here?” You explained how you met Maddie and moved to Ohio, having a nice conversation. He seemed nice, not your type, but it was good to pass the time waiting for the group just talking with someone. You soon heard and saw your friends approaching, saying goodbye to the friendly stranger to meet up with them again. “We leave you alone for fifteen minutes and you’re already chatting up hot guys! You maneater!” Maddie laughed. You obviously knew she was joking, knowing you barely went on dates, let alone chatted up guys. You laughed along with her, not missing the strange look on Josh’s’ face. He understood it was a joke, right? The last thing you wanted was for him to think you were a serial dater, or, even worse, that you were interested in that guy back there. You took a mental note to talk to Josh and subtly let him know you were still very available.

After walking around for nearly three hours, you were glad everyone agreed to take a break and have lunch in the zoo’s restaurant. You waited to pick a seat for everyone else to sit down, determined to sit next to Josh. You haven’t had the chance to speak with him and you thought you noticed him slightly avoiding you, though you weren’t sure. “Made a choice yet? I’m thinking either pizza or a burger.” You said to Josh after sitting next to him at the end of the table. “Not sure.” He simply stated, not looking at you. “O, ok. Take your time. Anyway, I wanted to thank you for taking me to the zoo. It’s really nice, I’m enjoying myself a lot.” You said, smiling at him. “I’ve noticed.” Well, this is going great, you thought to yourself. “Ok, well, excuse me, I have to use the bathroom.” You said, leaving your seat. Entering the bathroom, you sighed heavily, looking at yourself in the mirror. Just tell him you don’t like that guy and that you barely even date and Maddie was just kidding. You muttered to yourself, sighing again. “Hey, are you ok?” Jenna had entered the bathroom. You didn’t hear her and wasn’t sure when she came in, but you hoped she didn’t hear you talk to yourself. “Yeah, sure.” You smiled, acting like nothing happened. “We’re ready to order, so I thought I’d come get you.” She said, holding the door open for you.

You ate in silence, not knowing what to say to Josh, or how to say it. “Look who just walked in, y/n. Your new boyfriend.” Ashley said, pointing at the door. Maddie and she laughed and whistled at you. “Come on. We just chatted while waiting. I don’t even know his name. I’m really not interested in him, and I’m sure he isn’t in me either.” You responded, glancing over to Josh when you spoke. He barely responded. Looking up from the table, your heart sank when you spotted the guy waving at you and making his way over to your table. “Hey! Having fun? I just realized I don’t even know your name. I’m Brandon, by the way.” He said, extending his hand to you. “Nice to meet you again, Brandon. I’m y/n.” You shook his hand, not wanting to be rude to him. “Well, I better get back to my sis. So… maybe I’ll see you around the zoo later, y/n.” Brandon said, walking off. It took a couple of minutes before Maddie and Ashley stopped ooh-ing and whistling. Your tried to salvage the situation by repeating you were not interested in him and you were just trying to be friendly. “Everyone had enough? I’ll pay, let’s move on. We still have a lot to see and we promised Chris and Kelly to have a family dinner, so we can’t stay out too late.” Josh interrupted all of you, standing up before anyone could respond.

As you feared, Josh attempted to avoid you the rest of the day. And whenever you managed to get near him and talk, his answers were short and snappy. When you walked towards the zoo exit, you realized it might be your last chance to say something about Brandon to Josh. You stopped walking, waiting for Josh to catch up with you. He was walking next to Tyler, who luckily sped up to talk to Jenna. “I just wanted to say that Maddie and Ashley were just messing around. You know, talking about Brandon. I’m really not interested in him. And I’m not a maneater either. I think I’ve only had two dates in my life. I’m not sure if that was bothering you, but I just wanted to clear that up.” You quickly said, surprised by your own courage. “Ok.” Josh responded, smiling at you. You thought you could see relieve in his eyes. “I figured they were probably kidding. You seemed genuinely embarrassed by them. Anyway, don’t worry about me, I wasn’t bothered by it.” He looked straight at you, sweetly smiling. You tried to look away from his beautiful eyes, but just couldn’t. “So, wanna go crazy on the playground then?” You finally said when you passed a field with swings, slides and a wooden house. Josh smile got even bigger and he sprinted towards the slide, you following him soon. Even though he stated he wasn’t bothered about it, his mood appeared to have become ten times better since your little talk.

“Thank heavens, it’s the car!” Jenna dramatically said. You were all tired from a whole day of walking around and she definitely wasn’t the only one relieved to see the car. While Tyler, Jenna, Ashley and Madison quickly took their seats in the car, you helped Josh putting everybody’s bags and souvenirs in the trunk. You were chatting happily and just when you felt content you made things alright with Josh, you heard a voice. “Leaving without saying goodbye?” Brandon asked, laughing at his own joke. Josh grumpily closed the trunk and went to the backdoor of the car. “I know it might be a bit forward, but I really liked talking to you, y/n. I was wondering if you like to go on a date with me?” Brandon asked. You took a couple of seconds thinking about how to turn him down without being rude. Apparently, this moment was enough for Josh to jump to his own conclusions, huffing and opening the front door, asking Jenna if she minded sitting in the back of the car with the girls. He then quickly sat down and closed the door, not hearing you telling Brandon “I’m sorry. It was nice meeting you, but I can’t go out with you. I kinda already have a thing for someone else.”

#josh dun x reader #josh dun imagine #josh dun fanfiction #Josh Dun #tyler joseph #twenty one pilots imagine #Twenty One Pilots #madison joseph #jenna joseph