For the requests: traumatized steve & eddie going to a wolf sanctuary and eddie watching steve basically live with the wolves in their area. And the one wolf,the one that hated everyone, the one who meaner and didn't get along with anyone to its cruel abusive situation (perhaps it was raised from puppyhood and onwards by people who used it in dogfighting, before it was rescued, that wolf, goes right up to Steve and sits by him. Giving him comfort. When Steve has bad nightmares he goes to that wolf's pen and they sleep cuddled together bc that wolf also has nightmares. (It can also be a wolfdog)
AS ALWAYS YOU COME THROUGH WITH SOMETHING FUN AND CREATIVE AND AS ALWAYS I MAKE IT EMOTIONAL AS SHIT!!! I was feelin' some type of way yesterday and started on this at peak emotional upheaval, which is really something I don't recommend. As many things tend to do, this got away from me and I think I could've still let it keep going, but I had to cut it off. Hope you love it!!! - Mickala ❤️
-----------------------------------------------
It was Robin’s idea.
She knew therapy wasn’t working. She knew firsthand that the nightmares, especially Steve’s, were impossible to handle some nights.
She stayed with him enough after the Russians to know he was averaging four hours of restless sleep on a good night.
And now that he’d seen the horrors of the Upside Down, and Eddie almost dying, and Max almost dying, and the guilt of just existing, they were worse.
Eddie had them, but he was usually able to calm down relatively quickly, usually even fall back into a dreamless sleep after.
His problem was just seeing the bats everywhere, even when he was awake. A large bird would fly by and he was ducking for cover like a bomb would be dropped on him. He’d hear screeching, sometimes even just kids yelling at the park, and he’d have a panic attack.
Drastically different problems, but Robin said this could help with both of them.
So Steve and Eddie stood outside the wolf sanctuary, staring at the front office entrance where they were told to check in.
They glanced at each other, waiting for the other to make the first move.
It’s not that they were scared. They’d been told about the process on the phone in great detail, the sanctuary director answering all of their questions in a friendly tone.
She’d said that the wolf sanctuary had been used as a form of therapy for people for years now, though many psychiatrists didn’t consider it an appropriate treatment.
Considering Steve and Eddie had been seeing a professional psychiatrist for months now with no progress and serious weight loss and migraines from their prescriptions, they were willing to give this a fair shot.
But their fear that it wouldn’t work kept circling through their minds.
If this didn’t work, they weren’t sure what else they could possibly try.
That was terrifying.
They were supposed to stay for a month, with the option of extending the stay if they felt they needed it.
It was expensive.
But this was on the US government, and Eddie was always quick to spend their money for his benefit.
Steve was just along for the ride.
They walked in together, both nervously looking around at the chairs and desks, bookshelves, pictures of wolves and mountains on the walls, and one small, gray-haired woman at the front desk.
“Oh, aren’t you two precious! Which one’s Steve and which one’s Eddie?”
“I’m Steve,” Eddie smirked as he held out his hand.
Steve smacked his arm.
“He’s Eddie, and he’s probably gonna be this way the whole time. Sorry in advance,” Steve told the woman.
“This is wonderful! You’ll be fun to have around. I’m Fran, I run the front office. I spoke to you the other day on the phone a bit about the check in. Are you boys ready?”
They both nodded.
She clapped her hands together in excitement.
Steve could tell Eddie loved her. She was full of theatrics like he was, every word punctuated by an exaggerated movement.
“First, the boring part. We did some of the first part over the phone, but these packets need to be filled out completely and given back to me. You can have a seat anywhere to do those. When that’s done, I’ll show you where to bring your bags so you can unpack and get comfortable. We can do a tour before dinner.”
She placed the packets on the desk in front of her, then took two pens out of a mug and placed them down too.
“If you have any questions, let me know. You two are just the cutest!”
She walked through a small doorway a few feet behind her desk and they grabbed the packets to start filling them out.
The first page was basic personal information, which had been filled out already. The second page was emergency contact information and how they were referred. But the third page is where it got difficult.
It has questions like “What is your worst memory?” and “Who is the person you would most expect to protect you in a life or death situation? Why?”
And while Eddie and Steve could probably answer those easily from terrible experiences, there was a lot they weren’t allowed to say.
So they just stuck with the official government stories for any and all Upside Down related parts, which was most of them.
Fran bustled back in, two steaming mugs in her hands. She set them on her desk carefully and then walked over to where Eddie was sitting.
“How’s it going?”
“Good. Almost done,” he smiled up at her.
“And you, dear?” She asked Steve.
“Good. I’m sorry I write kind of slow.”
Steve’s face was red, like he was embarrassed. Eddie watched as he focused on the paper in front of him, his hand moving slowly across the paper.
Steve’s concussions had a lot of lasting effects; migraines and one ear that was barely working, the occasional speech delay, and an inconvenient struggle with writing, especially if it was answering questions about himself like this.
Eddie distracted Fran as he wrote his last answer, talking to her about her favorite part of the sanctuary and how long she’s been working here.
He handed the packet to her when he was done, glancing over at Steve to see he was just starting on the last page.
“Hey, Fran, would it be okay if you helped me get our bags from the car while Steve finishes up?”
Steve sent him a grateful smile as he continued answering the questions on the paper.
As he walked with Fran to the car, she touched his arm.
“He’s got a lot going on, doesn’t he?”
“Yeah. He’s been dealing with this a lot longer than I have,” Eddie smiled sadly at her, touching her hand to accept the comfort she was giving and give some in return. “I hope this works for both of us, but I’d be happy as long as it works for him.”
“You care a lot about him.”
It wasn’t a question, and her tone wasn’t judging, but Eddie could just tell. He should panic, he should tell her it wasn’t like that. And it wasn’t for Steve.
But he’d been hiding it for so long, and somehow successfully, he couldn’t lie to her.
“I love him. He doesn’t know how much. I did this for him, mostly. I mean I want it to help me too, but I know he wouldn’t have tried this if I didn’t come and he,” Eddie sighed. “He needs this. He can’t keep going like he has been.”
Fran pulled him into a hug and he did all he could not to start crying.
“He’s lucky to have you on his side no matter what, darling. And I’d bet anything he thinks the same of you,” she said softly.
“I don’t think it’s quite the same. He loves me like a friend, but he’s not…not like me.”
Gay. He wasn’t gay. Or even a little into men. Eddie was sure of that.
Fran pulled away and just smiled at him.
“Okay, then. Let’s get these bags inside.”
They managed to bring everything in in one trip, and by the time they made it back inside, Steve was done with his packet.
“Alright!” Fran clapped her hands together in excitement. “To your room!”
Eddie’s eyes widened.
“Room? Like, just one?”
“Yep! The other room we have for long-term residents is already taken for the next few weeks. Will that be okay?”
She was smiling innocently at Eddie, who knew she knew why he was suddenly panicking.
“That’s fine. We end up sharing a room all the time, right, Eds?” Steve asked as he grabbed his own bags from the floor.
“Uh. Yep. Totally fine.”
“Great!”
She led them out the back of the front office, down the sidewalk that led to a row of small buildings.
“This first building is storage. The next one is the short-term stays, usually people who donate frequently to keep us running, staying for a night or two to see where their money goes. This next building is for long-term stays. That’s you two. It’s split into a duplex, so you’ll have basically a studio apartment in there. Kitchen, bathroom, living area with a sectioned off area as the bedroom. You each will have a key, but keep in mind that the director also has a key for emergencies. The janitorial staff only goes if requested, so let me know if you feel it needs a sprucing up or you need new sheets or anything. Fridge is stocked and gets restocked every two weeks.” She paused as they made it to the steps to the building. “Oh! We don’t technically have a curfew for the guests. You’re adults and we trust you on your journey here. But we do ask that you try to be back no later than 11, as we often shut off many of the trail lights by midnight to ensure the animals have the closest replica of the wild as possible.”
Steve and Eddie nodded, eyes wide at all the information being thrown at them so quickly.
“Your room has a phone of course. You’re free to use as often as you’d like. Pressing 1 gets you in touch with the front office, 2 is for security, 3 is for the director’s office. I recommend calling the front office unless it’s an emergency so we can get in touch with the right people for you. After your tour, you’ll have free reign over the entire sanctuary except for anywhere marked employees and volunteers only. That’s for your safety, of course. We encourage you to be a part of some of the educational tours and seminars that we offer to the general public as well as enjoy time on your own with the wolves. Volunteers are here every day from 9 to 5, and the employees who help care for the wolves stay until 11. We have security here 24/7, but the director usually has a couple people on staff remain after regular hours in case of an animal emergency.”
This felt a little overwhelming, but he could already tell Steve was more relaxed here than he’d been anywhere else since he met him.
“I work when they need me, but my home number is by the phone in there for you just in case you need a chat. I retired a couple years ago so I spend a lot of my time at home with my dog. You’re never a bother, okay?”
They both nodded.
She hugged them both, handed them their keys, and started to walk away.
“Your tour will be in about an hour. James is running it today. You’ll love him!”
She was gone before they could even respond, so they looked back to each other and shrugged before heading inside.
The main door was unlocked, but the door inside marked with a “2” was locked. Steve unlocked it and pushed the door open.
The apartment was nice, but small, smaller than either of them had expected.
“Guess we’ll be getting pretty close for the next month, huh?” Steve joked.
Eddie’s heart was in his throat.
He could see the “bedroom” from where he stood. It was one queen sized bed. One.
“Um. Yep. Guess so. I can take the couch,” Eddie rushed out.
Steve clearly hadn’t seen the sleeping arrangement yet or he would have probably offered. He’s a self-sacrificing idiot, so Eddie had to rush to offer before he could.
“What? Why?”
Eddie gestured towards the bed.
“There’s plenty of room for both of us, dude. A month on the couch isn’t exactly gonna help with the nightmares.”
“It looks pretty cozy.”
Steve just stared at him, brows raised like Eddie was an idiot.
He was an idiot, but he didn’t need Steve thinking it.
“Eddie. Seriously. We can share a bed.”
Steve wouldn’t let him win, it’s just not who Steve was.
“Okay, okay! Let’s just unpack so we can go see some wolves or whatever.”
They unpacked in silence, Steve taking the spot closest to the door without Eddie having a choice.
Self-sacrificing idiot.
—--------------
James knocked on their door at exactly 4:00, like he’d been standing there waiting for the clock to change over from 3:59.
“Hello! I’m James. You’re Steve and Eddie?”
They all shook hands and James started explaining things quickly.
James was only a bit older than them, wearing a volunteer shirt that had seen better days, and had the energy of Dustin.
“So! I’m gonna show you the lay of the land, you can ask me questions, I can try to answer them, and then I can drop you off back here so you can eat. The first night can be a bit of an adjustment, so feel free to give me a call if you have trouble. My number is under Fran’s,” James spoke rapid-fire, but not so fast they couldn’t keep up. They were used to that, anyway.
“So to start, everything you guys really need is along this main trail.” He pointed the way they came earlier and then the other direction. “That way leads to our nutrition area for the wolves, which you are welcome to visit anytime during the day to help or feed some of the rehabilitated wolves in the building nextdoor which is the hospital. The hospital is only open to the guests staying here and employees from 12-5, just because much of the mornings are spent performing surgeries or checkups. You’re encouraged to spend time with any of the wolves there in recovery as it helps their spirits much like a person. But if you take the left at the fork in this trail, you’ll be led to other trails. The first one is the wolf enclosures, which I’m taking you to now.” He kept walking as he spoke, moving his hands constantly, big smile keeping Eddie and Steve enthralled.
“We have one specifically for the ones we’ve rescued who are still healing from injuries, and that one is off limits to everyone between dusk and dawn. Many of these wolves are relearning how to be wild and part of that is using the night to hunt. Being in their cage during those times could be dangerous. They wouldn’t necessarily eat you,” he paused to laugh. “But they may take a bite. Now! The second enclosure is where we keep Herald. You can laugh at his name.” Eddie let out a small laugh.
“Herald had a rough upbringing. He was rescued about six months ago from a traveling circus that had abused him for at least a few years. We think he’s about 5 years old, but can’t be 100% certain. He’s hesitant around all people, even the director. He can be very unpredictable, so only the director, vet, and head nutritionist are allowed in there. You’re welcome to visit from the outside anytime you’d like though! He’s shy, but it can’t hurt having people talk to him.”
James was walking pretty quickly, and if Steve wasn’t so in shape, he’d be struggling. He looked over at Eddie. Eddie was struggling a little, but didn’t want to stop or slow down.
“And the last enclosure is for the rest of the wolves. These are ones that may be reintroduced to the wild soon or who may have been rescued without injuries, but just aren’t ready to go yet. This enclosure has a few areas for public access. The first being the feeding area, the second being the petting area. The petting area is only able to be accessed when employees or volunteers are present. The third area is only for guests staying long term such as yourselves.”
James walked them through a gate off to the side of the enclosure.
“This area is my favorite in the whole sanctuary. It’s their den area. It’s not recommended to come alone, and you should always go to the petting area to meet them first, but this area is nice for anyone who wants to feel like a part of the pack.”
“We can go in there?”
“Again, it’s definitely recommended to meet the wolves in the petting area first, maybe feed them a few times to show them you’re a friend, but yes.”
“Huh.”
Eddie watched Steve’s reaction.
This was much more involved than they expected to be.
“So that’s the enclosures! The next part of this trail leads to a walking and biking trail that is a great way to see some nature without having to leave the area. It’s snake season, though, so make sure you know your snake safety beforehand and bring the provided whistle with you in case of an emergency. Volunteers and employees are always within hearing distance during normal hours and can usually respond within 3-4 minutes.”
“Could we go back to Herald?”
Eddie’s head snapped to Steve, who was looking at James with a kind smile.
“Oh. Well, sure. The only other thing I needed to show you was the trail leading to the lake, but we can go back after.”
So James backtracked, Steve and Eddie close on his heels.
They got to the enclosure with Herald, but didn’t see him.
“He likes to hide. Especially if it isn’t close to meal time, he doesn’t usually come close to the fence. His den is hidden away.”
Steve kept walking up to the fence as James spoke, Eddie watching and trying to figure out what was going on.
“Herald? You there?” Steve called gently into the fence. Wolves had excellent hearing, and he’d probably already heard them approach. “You can come say hi if you want to.”
Eddie stood next to Steve, looking out at the area in the enclosure. There was a good mix of forest and empty area, with plenty of things that were probably used as toys scattered around. He watched for any sign of movement, listened for any trotting over.
Nothing.
Steve looked incredibly disappointed, but James walked closer and gave them both a smile.
“Like I said, Herald isn’t very social and it’s nothing personal. He doesn’t even seem to like the director and all the wolves love her.”
But Eddie knew Steve. He knew that he wasn’t gonna let that shit go.
“Alright! Shall we head to the trail by the lake?”
Eddie watched as Steve sighed, but nodded.
—--------------
Steve cooked them dinner that evening, said it helped him relax and that he would feel more at home if he got into a routine.
Eddie wouldn’t complain; He loved Steve’s cooking.
He made a basic spaghetti dish, even toasted some bread and sprinkled some garlic powder on it to make garlic bread.
They sat at the small table by the front door and ate in silence.
“It’s really quiet here.”
Eddie looked up to see Steve staring down at his plate, biting his lip nervously.
“It’s kind of nice though. Peaceful.”
“Yeah.”
Eddie knew what he was worried about.
He was worried the silence would make him have more nightmares instead of less, that he’d be left with nothing to help him if this failed.
“Hey,” Eddie reached over and patted Steve’s hand that rested on the table. “I’m here, alright? You won’t be alone.”
“Yeah,” Steve agreed, only slightly relaxing back into his seat.
—--------------
The next day was relaxed.
They walked along the main trail after breakfast, happy to see Fran again and meet some new people.
They stopped at Herald’s enclosure, but still didn’t see or hear him.
Steve was disappointed, but it was hidden away when they were able to feed and pet some of the other wolves before lunch.
The wolves were all beautiful, clearly well taken care of, and even the ones still in recovery were cleaned, well-fed, and cared for by the team.
Eddie quickly had a favorite: Mabel. She was an “old woman” as the employee at the feeding area said. She was 12 years old, had been brought in from the side of the road after being hit. She had had a broken leg and many broken ribs, along with cuts that needed stitches. Not the worst they’d seen, but due to her being nearly 11 at the time, they didn’t expect her to pull through. She did though, and had quickly become known as the leader of the group. All the wolves respected her, it was clear even to Eddie and Steve. She was the first to the feeding area, the first to the petting area, and would often stand guard over the others as they went into the shared spaces.
She was light brown with gray speckled throughout, her scars visible, but mostly covered with hair.
Steve loved Mabel, too, but he still had his heart set on Herald.
Eddie wasn’t stupid. He knew why Steve was so fixated on him.
Someone who was abused and hidden away and expected to perform every day for crowds of people? Yeah, Steve and Herald had quite a bit in common.
He just didn’t want him to get his hopes up for nothing.
After lunch, they decided to walk over to the nutrition center, maybe learn something new.
It was educational, and fun, and Eddie said multiple times how much he wished actual school had been like this.
The nutritionists let them help set up all the wolves’ dinners, showing them portion sizes for each of the wolves, telling them what the wolves’ favorites were. How they celebrated birthdays for them.
It was fun. Steve even cracked some smiles throughout.
—--------------
That night was rough.
Steve had fallen asleep quickly, much to Eddie’s delight, but it didn’t last long.
Eddie was woken up not long after he fell asleep by whimpering. He glanced at the alarm clock by the bed. 10:38. Barely an hour.
He knew from experience that waking Steve up would just make things worse for him, so he gently set his hand on Steve’s side, the best support he could give right now.
It physically pained Eddie to watch Steve’s face tighten in fear and sadness, whatever his nightmare was this time painting a horrifying picture he couldn’t escape.
Steve had mentioned once that his worst nightmares weren’t even about reliving anything that happened. They weren’t anyone dying, though he had those too. They weren’t even him dying.
They were everyone turning on him, finally seeing he wasn’t worth their time or effort, leaving him alone in that big empty house just like his parents did. He said the worst part was when Robin and Eddie left in the nightmare. When they looked at him with disgust and said he wasn’t good enough for the kids, and he damn sure wasn’t good enough for them.
No matter how many times they told him that would never be true, he still had them.
Ten minutes went by, agonizingly slowly, tears falling down Steve’s face. Eddie was whispering words of comfort, hoping that somehow Steve could hear him, but knowing he probably couldn’t.
But finally, Steve’s eyes opened, the whimpering stopped, and he was no longer hearing and seeing what hurt him the most.
He sat up and wiped his eyes, but the tears kept coming and his breathing was still labored.
Eddie sat up with him, hand on his arm, thumb rubbing back and forth to keep him present.
“I think I need to walk it off,” Steve said, voice wet with tears still to come.
“Okay. Do you want me to come with you?”
Steve shook his head.
“No, go back to sleep. I’ll only be out for a few minutes.”
And as much as Eddie knew that was a lie, and knew he should probably go with Steve, he had to trust him.
He’d be safe. He had to be.
—--------------
Steve walked aimlessly up and down the main trail for 10 minutes, trying to breathe in the fresh air, focus on his surroundings.
It wasn’t working as well as he’d hoped, but it was better than staying in bed and letting Eddie see him like this.
Eddie was too kind, always. He was bright, like the sun and the stars and the moon on a clear night. He was everything. And if Steve let himself be too vulnerable, too much, Eddie would take that light.
He lost track of where he was going, his breaths coming in sharper pants now as he let more tears fall.
A noise made him freeze.
Leaves rustling.
He looked up to see Herald’s enclosure in front of him. And…
Herald.
Herald was huge, much bigger than any of the other wolves they’d seen so far. He was beautiful. Scars along his legs showing that he had been abused awfully before coming here, but the rest of him glowed with health. He was standing about eight feet from the fence, trying to hide some of his body still behind the bushes along the forest line.
Steve slowly made his way to the fence, his hands up to show he wasn’t going to cause any harm.
Herald didn’t come closer, but he didn’t back or run away either.
Steve counted that as a win.
He instantly slumped to the ground at the fence, his hands and head resting against the chain links like they were the only thing keeping him upright. Maybe they were.
Steve closed his eyes.
He was so focused on staying calm, he couldn’t hear Herald approach. But he suddenly felt a cold, wet nose against his head.
He didn’t panic, he didn’t want to scare Herald, but he realized suddenly that his fingers were very much easily accessed by sharp teeth.
He let Herald sniff him, then slowly looked up.
Herald was tilting his head at him, almost as if he was asking if he was okay.
That made Steve sob.
Herald jumped slightly, but then moved so he was completely against the fence, laying down so his warm body could be against Steve’s.
Steve slowly let his hands fall, reaching through the fence slowly to let them rest in Herald’s fur.
He felt the wolf sigh, and he couldn’t help but laugh.
“Yeah, I get it. Sometimes it’s nice to have someone care, huh? You’re so soft,” Steve whispered, knowing Herald was still not completely relaxed around him.
“You tired?”
Steve felt a little silly for asking a wolf a question, but he felt even sillier when he realized Herald had just moved his head up and down. It was probably a coincidence, but the timing was crazy.
“Me too. We should get some sleep.”
Herald huffed and rolled his head back against the fence.
“Want me to stay?”
Herald huffed again.
“Okay.”
So Steve stayed.
He sat down on the ground, back against the fence, and listened to the crickets and the steady breaths of Herald.
He was woken up by Eddie shaking him and a growl coming from behind him.
“Steve! Jesus, I thought you’d got lost or died or something.”
“How long have I been out here?”
“It’s nearly two in the morning!”
Herald was growling behind him, protectively pacing behind Steve like he would find a way to get through the fence if Eddie tried to hurt him.
“Hey, Herald, it’s okay. This is Eddie. He’s here with me. He’s my friend,” Steve said calmly, holding his hand through the fence so Herald could sniff him and see he was okay.
“Steve! Get your hand out of there. He isn’t friendly, remember?”
“Oh, please. He just slept by me for hours and let me hold his fur like he was a stuffed animal. He’s plenty friendly.”
Eddie just stared, jaw slack, as he realized Steve was right.
Herald was licking Steve’s hand, leaving his scent on him like he was trying to provide as much protection as possible.
“You made friends with the only wolf here who hates people. Unbelievable.”
“Hey, be nice. He just needs some love is all.”
Eddie nodded. Yeah, him and another person with a name that started with S and rhymed with sleeve.
Eddie’s heart had been racing for the last 15 minutes since he woke up and realized Steve wasn’t in bed next to him or anywhere in the apartment.
He finally took a deep breath, balling his shaking hands into fists and stuffing them into the pocket of his hoodie.
“We should head back inside, Stevie.”
Steve seemed to notice Eddie wasn’t doing so great.
“I’m alright, Eds. Hey, look at me.” Eddie looked at Steve’s face, the way he seemed more relaxed than when he first left after his nightmare. “I’m okay. I must have fallen asleep.”
Eddie took a deep breath, resting his head against Steve’s shoulder as he let it out.
“I thought you were gone.”
“Nah, you can’t get rid of me now.”
“No?”
“Nope. Herald and I are just good friends, but you’re still-” Steve cut himself off, but Eddie wasn’t going to let that pass.
“What?”
“Nothing. Not important.”
“Yeah it is. Tell me.”
Steve seemed nervous, and Herald must have sensed it because he let out a low growl.
“It’s just that you mean a lot to me. Kind of everything, actually.”
Eddie couldn’t breathe.
What did that even mean?
Steve’s hand was suddenly in his hair, playing with the ends the way Eddie did when he was nervous.
“You’re just. I mean, how could you not mean the world to me? You dropped everything to come here with me because you knew I wouldn’t do it alone, Eds. You bring me candy at work even though I literally have access to all the candy I want at the counter. You let me find reasons not to watch the scary movies on movie nights when Dustin picks because you know I can’t handle them. You swim in the pool with me alone so no one knows how much I still hate it. I…you’re just…”
Eddie didn’t let him stutter any more, knowing what he was saying without actually saying it.
He knew what Steve was afraid of, and he wasn’t going to let him be scared anymore.
“Steve. I love you. That’s why I do all that. I love you. I’m in love with you. You deserve more than what I can give, but I can keep giving you all of the love I have, and hopefully that will be enough.”
Steve’s lips were on his before he finished speaking, teeth clacking together at the force of it.
Herald huffed, but they didn’t stop. Eddie didn’t know how he was supposed to now that he had Steve’s lips on his.
He never wanted them gone.
His hands reached up to Steve’s neck, cradling his jaw between them as if he was holding something precious. He was.
“I love you so much,” Steve said against his lips, melting against Eddie.
“I love you, Stevie,” Eddie said back. He planted another soft kiss to his lips before resting their foreheads together. “Let’s go back to bed, okay? We can come see Herald after breakfast.”
Steve nodded and turned to Herald.
“I’ll be back. Don’t hide from me, okay?”
He reached in to give Herald’s head a scratch, and Eddie shook his head in disbelief.
It took less than 48 hours for Steve to have the one wolf in this sanctuary who didn’t like people completely wrapped around his finger.
But Eddie could relate.
Steve’s charm was damn near impossible to resist and now he didn’t have to try.
488 notes
·
View notes
Amnesia!Dabi
Once again, the ask has forsaken me- (Edit:and then this got away from me, holy shit-)
so like, the “half-baked plan to leave”-
Dabi, by this point, has spent - god, I don’t know how old he is - let’s say sixish years? essentially homeless, mostly without memory, and hiding as best he can from the law. And like, yeah, he wants to know who the hell he is, but he’s out of options, and by the time he joins the LoV … I won’t say he’s given up, but he’s getting real damn tired of not knowing things. It’s not like he’s investigated all of Japan, but he’s starting to wonder if that’s even where he’s from. Or even if maybe he should stop looking so hard, find somewhere he can hunker down, maybe see a therapist? Someone who could help him unravel all the blankness in his head, anyway. But, like, it’s not a concrete PLAN, so much as a thought experiment, at this point.
then he joins the LoV, meets Himiko, and goes “oh. huh. maybe this won’t be so bad?” Like, he’s under no illusions that these are the bad guys, but like. He’s remembered more bits and pieces hanging out with Himiko than literally anything else he’s ever tried. I doubt he’d trust the league as a whole with his memory loss, but if he says “yeah, I’m trying to track down someone, it’s sort of important and means a lot to me”, I imagine they’d all be pretty on board? Like, the League are all fairly nice people, really, so it’s going ok. Yeah, there are a few things that make him a bit uncomfortable, and he’s quickly becoming protective of Himiko (and worried, is she supposed to have random fevers?) but Dabi’s thinking maybe they CAN help him figure this out.
But he also isn’t a moron. He knows this kind of group could easily screw him over, so now he’s seriously considering back-up plans. Even if the group DOES screw him over, he’s met a few people now, made some of his own connections. He could pretty easily get papers to get himself out of country if he needs to. He’s also making plans to find a hospital or something to take Himiko to, because she’s starting to seriously worry him. I’m basing this mostly on myself, honestly - I have a pretty severe Iron deficiency - and before we figured out that was the problem, I would have dizzy spells, migraines, nausea with no explanation, my immune system wasn’t great so I’d keep getting sick, etc, So this is what’s happening to Himiko. And like, the rest of the League isn’t indifferent to Himiko clearly being sick, but as far as they know, this might be normal for her. Dabi’s the one really getting worried and starting to look at treatment. But this is still mostly theoretical. He doesn’t have a solid plan.
But then- then we have the Forest Training Camp, and Kidnapping Katsuki. And that’s our first big stumbling block, cause like. Dabi is not okay with hurting kids. Not at all. In any way, shape, or form. He’s taking solace in the fact that this isn’t, like, the goal - they’re just here to recruit, right? Only, wow, so many kids ALMOST DIE, this is NOT OKAY. Honestly, he might have dipped during the fight itself , except then he sees Shouto, and “Surprise!” he’s remembering baby Shouto, “Just one more, T****-n**!”, wait, what, who? What was that??? The whole thing makes him seriously disoriented and it’s all he can do to make it back to the hideout without passing out. Which, ya know, he does the moment he has a flat, safe surface on which to do so.
So he wakes up, all confused - he knows the Peppermint kid? Maybe? - and he’s thinking of a plan, walks out into the main room … and sees Katsuki chained up. And muzzled.
Oh. Hell. No.
Yeah, fuck that, fuck this, Dabi does not want to be a part of whatever bullshit this is. He’s honestly preparing to set the place on fire, when All Might shows up, everything quickly goes to shit, and we probably have some awesome back-to-back dueling going on, as Dabi tries to keep Himiko and Katsuki out of the line of fire.
Now, the moment Katsuki gets rescued, Dabi is grabbing Himiko and bolting. He might cover their retreat, might create some theatrical distraction, but then he is LEAVING. He is NOT sticking around to watch All Might punch the thousand year old man. And he does get away, but now-
Well, I would imagine during the fight, Himiko got hurt. And maybe if she was completely healthy, it wouldn’t matter so much, but Himiko (as we have stated, but I feel the need to reiterate) has spent twelve years being STARVED. So she’s hurt, probably already sick, and not doing too great. Dabi is, at this point, a wanted criminal. He doesn’t have a lot of money, he just betrayed what allies he had, and watched the boss of those guys throw down with the best hero ever born. He has NOTHING to work with.
Except …
He remembers Shouto. He remembers Shouto as a kid, a little kid, a memory that’s clearer than any he has. Shouto goes to U.A., where they have Recovery Girl, and are pretty outspoken about Quirk Discrimination and how they won’t tolerate it. One of their teachers even has a blood based Quirk. Yes, Dabi participated in helping kidnap one of their students, but he also helped that student then escape. If it was just his memory, or just Himiko being sick and hurt, Dabi might not have done it. He might have figured something else out. Laid low, or found an underground hospital.
But together?
Yeah, he’s taking that risk.
-
YEAH ITS
so re: the Timeline if we’re going with the Chaos Children timeline where he ‘died’ at 19 and he’s 23 when 1-A’s first year starts so it’s closer to just the three years depending on how long he was in coma-town(in CC it’s still a bit so he hasn’t been ‘awake’ for /too/ long, enough to get some bearings and to be manipulated, but in this AU we could have the coma being really short which is part of why he escapes.)
But even so the three years is enough for him to start looking into things and being incredibly frustrated.
Actually using the CC timeline might make things worse because it’s harder for him to figure out how old he is as he’s already a grown adult. Like still a young adult obvs he has some maturing to do still, but in terms of physicality he’s pretty indistinguishable and any other features that would be used to guess his age are obscured by the burns.
I think the rest of the League would notice and care about Himiko’s health, but it’s. None of them trust AfO’s doctor because the fucker’s playing frankenstein and taking her to a /real/ doctor would result in her (and whoever is escorting her) getting arrested. Like yeah she can shapeshift and disguise herself doctors /really/ need to know your real self to get a diagnosis and to prescribe meds so she can’t really just walk in as a rando even with fake paperwork.
So they try to help her as best they can with things they can get at a pharmacy(either over the counter meds or stuff they rob from behind the counter when the otc stuff doesn’t work). And Himiko kinda waving them off because she’s ‘always like this’ and ‘just needs to manage herself better’ doesn’t help. Because they don’t know the cause is because of her Quirk and being starved for 12 years, and even though she’s getting a decent supply of blood now (sometimes from them letting her have a bite of them, sometimes through whoever is the target of the day), it’s not enough to really make up for the years of neglect. But again: they don’t entirely know all of these details so when she says she’s used to feeling bad like that, they start to assume some kind of like chronic illness type of thing that yes she genuinely needs a doctor for.
But again that loops back to the above issue of getting her to a doctor without being thrown in jail. Doubly so because they doubt she’d really get proper treatment in jail either.
I think the thing that keeps Dabi from taking Himiko and jumping ship earlier is mostly just Himiko herself. Because she doesn’t want to risk it and it’s pretty impossible to force her. And even on the days when she does feel awful enough to debate risking trying to go to a doctor, Himiko still hesitates because she’s grown friendly with the other LoV members and this might endanger them but also she’d never be able to see them again.
And then yeah the kidnapping thing happens and it’s. It’s a final push but even then Dabi might’ve hesitated more if Himiko hadn’t been hurt. And while he could patch her up on his own both of them REALLY need an actual doctor. so he takes the risk.
Himiko is probably mad at him for a while. Sure, she understands, so she’s not too mad and she’s not going to stay mad at him forever. But she’s at least gonna cry about it for a while.
10 notes
·
View notes