#That's the first sort of experience

[chronurgy]

Reading forgotten realms lore is just like [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [something really unique and interesting] [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [EXTREMELY WEIRD SEX THING] [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [standard fantasy worldbuilding]

Except for when it's like [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [EXTREMELY WEIRD SEX THING] [EXTREMELY WEIRD SEX THING] [EXTREMELY WEIRD SEX THING] [EXTREMELY WEIRD SEX THING] [EXTREMELY WEIRD SEX THING] [standard fantasy worldbuilding] [EXTREMELY WEIRD SEX THING]

#Inspired by me reading the highharvesttide wiki page #That's the first sort of experience #Anything even remotely related to drow is the second thing #bg3 #Yeah so the highharvesttide wiki page is like it's a festival to celebrate the harvest! Children born on this day are thought to be blessed #By tymora. Oh also “human females” born on this day can “control their reproductive system through sheer force of will” and #Only get pregnant when they want. Also they can immediately sense if they've been poisoned #Always a roller-coaster the forgotten realms wiki

[rambles-about-minecraft-ocs]

one of my favorite things about zedaph is that on a server full of people that find strange and oft-overlooked minecraft mechanics or rare events and then see just how far they can push them in the name of spectacle or efficiency or world-breaking, zed is over here finding these mechanics in order to do the weirdest things he can think of in as entertaining a manner as possible

like i 100% have faith in zedaph's theoretical ability to be just as efficient or spectacular or world-breaking. if he wanted to do that stuff, i trust that he absolutely could. but thats so far from being his priority. instead, hes going to spend around a week of irl time focused entirely on eventually having the good luck to spawn in something insanely rare so that he can convert it into something even rarer, the result of which being something that 99% of the server reacts with complete and utter shock that it even exists in the first place, just because its zany and funny and he wanted to. and i love that

#zedaph #hermitcraft #genuinely i adore the clucky few project im not even done watching the episode and i had to pause and make this post #i saw impulses video first and went ''that HAS to be some sort of datapack or something-'' #only to immediately go ''no. no it cant be. because this is zed #and its practically a trademark of his to push the limits of the game as far as possible in the direction least expected #not for the purpose of efficiency or spectacle or intimidation or whatever like some players who push limits #but purely for the purpose of making something so funny you cant help but laugh at whats going on #and maybe being a bit impressed that he ever thought of it in the first place'' #at which point i went ''holy shit. since its zed doing this. somehow he ACTUALLY got a villager on a chicken. with no cheats. thats INSANE' #i was relieved when i checked my subscriptions to see what the next video i had to watch was and saw he would be next in line #bc if i had to sit through 19 other hermits videos before i could watch his and find out what the fuck he was doing i would have been so sa #sidenote but i feel like a zed video where he interacts with this many other people all in the same video is so rare #idk i didnt watch season 9 and i know he started collabing a lot more w/ other hermits then #so maybe its not nearly as rare these days #but like the last one that *i* saw where he interacted with this many people at once was towards the end of season 8 #when all the people he experimented on earlier in the season came back to experiment on him #and like i would like zeds videos with or without the collabs. but its a lot of fun to see him interact with people #so its very cool to me when he does it with a lot of people all in the same video

[inkskinned]

you wanted to be a good friend, because you loved your friends, but the truth was that everyone else somehow had a pamphlet on being normal that you never received. most of the time you learn by trial-and-error. you are terrified of the next big mistake you make, because it seems like the rules are completely arbitrary.

you've learned to keep the prickly parts of your personality in a stormcloud under your bed - as if they're a second version of you; one that will make your friends hate you. it feels feral, burning, ugly.

instead, you have assembled habits based on the statistical likelihood of pleasing others. you're a good listener, which is to say - if you do speak up, you might end up saying the wrong thing and scaring off someone, but people tend to like someone-who-listens. or you've got no true desires or goals, because people like it when you're passive, mutable. you're "not easy to fluster" which is to say - your emotions are fundamentally uninteresting to others around you; so you've learned to control them to a degree that you can no longer really feel them happening.

you have long suspected something is wrong with you, but most of the time, googling doesn't help. you are so-used to helping-yourself, alone and with no handbook. the reek of your real self feels more like a horrible joke - you wake up, and, despite all your preparations, suddenly the whole house is full of smoke. the real you is someone waiting to ruin your other-life, the one where you're normal and happy. the real-self is unpredictable, angry.

your real self snarls when people infantilize the whole situation. because if you were really suffering, everyone seems to think you'd be completely unable to cope. but you already learned the rules, so you do know how to cope, and you have fucking been coping. it's not black-and-white. it's not that you are healed during the other times - it's just that you're able to fucking try. and honestly, whenever you show symptoms, it's a really fucking bad sign.

because the symptoms you have are ugly and unmanageable for others. your symptoms aren't waifish white girl things. they're annoying and complicated. they will be the subject of so many pretentious instagram reels. if they cared about you, they'd just show up on time. you care, a lot, so deeply it burns you. you like to picture a world where the comments read if they loved you, they'd never need glasses to see. but since that's a rule you've seen repeated - "one must never be late or you are a bad friend" - you constantly worry about being late and leave agonizingly early. there are no words for how you feel when you're still late; no matter how hard you were trying.

so you have to make up for it. you have to make up for that little horrible real you that you keep locked in a cabinet. you are bad at answering emails so every project you make has to be perfect. you are weird and sensitive so you have to learn to be funny and interesting. you are an inconvenience to others, so you become as smooth as possible, buffing out all the rough parts.

all this. all this. so people can pass their hands over you and just tell you just the once -how good you are. you're a good friend. you're loveable.

#spilled ink #woke up at 530 to write this lmafo #me in a cold sweat: #how do i be normal #edit in the tags: #hey so i've seen y'all talk about like ... wondering if ur ''allowed'' to relate #like if this is about X specific diagnosis #and when i first posted it i really almost labelled it ''please don't assume this is about a specific condition'' #because as an artist i am often walking this line of discussing a symptom or discussing my conditions etc #and sometimes yes ! i do want to talk about an experience that is specific to who i am and my condition #but sometimes the effort of the post is about the EXPERIENCE rather than the diagnosis #because yes i am not neurotypical and as a result that influences my work but it is ALSO true that there are many reasons #why someone might experience this particular vague horrible feeling that you are... almost being CHASED by what you ''really'' are. #that you're outrunning your symptoms... that you're not really normal you're just sort of a mockery of a person #.... that's a really isolating and horrible way to feel no matter why you are feeling it. and the nature of this PARTICULAR post is that #it is inherently talking ABOUT that sense of isolation & of feeling not-deserving & of minimizing your own experiences to make urself #palatable for society in a way that others find easy-to-deal-with.... #this post is about a certain experience such that my impression is there's a higher likelihood that those who relate #would have more difficulty thinking they ''deserve'' to relate - that it doesn't REALLY belong to them #bc often we are the kind of people who are SO used to being alienated and set aside and ''different'' that we AUTOMATICALLY assume #that things are not ''for'' us... they never have been why would it start now #we are the kinds of people to be ... ''too normal for X diagnosis but too symptomatic to be normal'' #[or as this post points out... so good at ''coping''/masking/hiding it that we essentially conform to whatever shape we're poured into] #but i have witnessed others already say in the tags ''thought this was about me but it's about X so it can't be'' #and im like ... of course it was about you. #art is not a resource that is diminished by greater appreciation . #you reflect in whatever mirror fits your frame. not just the ones in your bedroom. not just the ones i specifically give you. #there will be - and often are - times that i will talk about my specific conditions... but if you're reading this #regardless of why you're here... we are here together. holding hands through space and time. and i love you for carrying it #and i know you're exhausted. i am too. but i understand. and i see you.

[majunju]

cringe

#genshin impact #my art #first time he has the drunk lumine experience and he gets genuine goosebumps bc hes so used to her snark at him that he cant comprehend #any sort of positive emotion from her directed at him #like hed almost rather receive a punch to the face than whatever that kiss was

[quietwingsinthesky]

i really do think the desire to paint ten as unambiguously The Worst™️ when it comes to his relationship with martha is out of this desire to uncomplicate their relationship. to decouple them as friends and people who profoundly impacted each other’s lives. it’s just an easier narrative to swallow: that ten was Awful to her and then martha kicked him to the curb when she realized she was too good for him. easier, maybe, then dealing with the troubles of unrequited affection don’t have to be anyone’s fault, or that ten shut martha out in a lot of ways but let her in in others that he wouldn’t let any other companion near, or that they were still friends, they still wanted to see each other and be around each other, even though it was messy and sometimes hurt. you know?

#sometimes the doctor is shitty. this is not news we know this. this is part of the package. its what makes their relationships with their #companions so interesting so important. #like. how do i put this. i see posts sometimes about how ten was ‘leading martha on’ implying that he was taking advantage of her feelings #to keep her around. and. okay. so. putting aside how that’s a weird thing to say about anyone period. #its also just. from my viewing experience. not true? #the doctor is just sort of Like That. he’s too intense he’s too quick to grasp for emotional intimacy he’s too messy. #but he’s not leading her on. he really is just Like That. #like i feel by getting caught up in the fact that martha is hurt by being compared to rose and is hurt by the fact that the doctor can’t or #won’t return her feelings. and like. yeah. of course that hurts. #but in being caught up in that. i think what im saying is that it feels like people sometimes forget that he’s. not required to do that. #like just because she has feelings for him doesn’t mean he needs to get over himself and return them or else he’s using her. that’s. that’s #not how relationships work. people can have romantic feelings and still be friends and not have anything come of it and that’s not a #terrible outcome. thats just how friendships are sometimes. #thats the core of it to me. they’re friends. the way people post about ten & martha sometimes i wonder if everyone’s forgotten that they #are friends. that they last parted as friends. that martha doesn’t hate him or secretely resent him for how he treated her. #like. she’s got complicated feelings about the whole thing. but they didn’t stop being friends. #i tell you what: if the doctor was in trouble and called for help. you could be damn certain that martha jones would be one of the first #people to answer. that’s what i know. #doctor who #the doctor #tenth doctor #martha jones

[friezaglasiencold]

‘Smouldering coals’ my ass, you clearly adore Kuriza. Emotionally repressed man who cannot comprehend that he loves his child unconditionally because his own father was awful my beloved and detested.

My father was a rat of a man, but that’s hardly relevant. I never said I didn’t care for my child.

And to think… here I was, being so vulnerable with my feelings. Shame on you, and shame on me for trying.

#img response #((he’s being a bit sarcastic but he is actually put off by this even if he can’t explain why)) #((because he really Doesn’t feel love the same way a “normal” person might and he was trying to communicate that)) #((he likes his son but he just isn’t able to be attached to someone in a non transactional way or at least he doesn’t think so)) #((he’ll discover his love for the kid as time passes and his feelings become stronger)) #((but that revulsion toward affection that he feels with others… it extends toward Kuriza too)) #((when his kid shows him love there’s a significant part of him that’s completely disgusted by it…)) #((it’s the first time he’s really been disturbed by his own emotional response or lack thereof)) #((he only carried the kid himself as a weird sort of self-imposed science experiment. Just to see if he could)) #((parenting doesn’t come naturally to him at all))

[aro-culture-is]

Aro-culture is trying to understand why society created the most ridiculous rituals and signs for romance and not finding a single answer/or that makes sense.

(No seriously, all the explanations I find are dumb. Send help)

.

#aro culture is #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #ask #mod axel #honestly all i got for u is that romance is a socially described category of emotion #and social categories are notoriously full of all sorts of cultural biases and assumptions and history that got lost to common knowledge #not to mention the human tendencies to create lil rituals that sometimes become big (ie knock on wood / slug bug) #so u end up with like. 'yeah u gotta not directly tell ppl that ur in romo with them immediately because...' #culturally it signals like. moving too fast or it's seen as embarrassing or you gotta do xyz things first #my sister advised me as a teen that in her experience and opinion - delivered like the words of a sage - if someone is bad at kissing #then they are bad at sex #(me [a kissing repulsed aro person who enjoys sex]: uhhh) #and honestly like. especially when viewed from the outside those things are fuckin wild #like... my mom came from a tiny backwoods type of place in [redacted] #and when i moved to [redacted] and one of the biggest cities in my state (though tbh not that big actually lol) #it caused all sorts of fun. she thinks it's exceptionally rude that not every single person on the street smiles and says hi #if there's not a crowd #she also gets really upset that service workers are less likely to make small talk #and both of those come from City Etiquette being more about like... not taking up ppl's time and attention and that being respectful #like smiling and saying hi to every stranger on the street is... honestly gonna be seen as a Huge Danger thing #and service workers do not have the *time* at most locations to chat with you - especially if it's busy - and it's seen as disrespectful to #both the workers and the people in line behind you to insist on it #but from her POV with Country Etiquette #this is equivalent to like. getting slapped in the face and told that you are specifically mad at her #and she gets legit anxious about it in a very 'this means i fucked up' way

[insanityisdivine]

Spa Girls

#mykissposts #kiss #paul stanley #starchild #space ace #space #spaceman #Ace looks like he's enjoying his first pampering experience #Paul looks like he's used to this sort of treatment #he's a professional spa girlie

[utilitycaster]

I just want to say, that I agree with almost all of your Critical Role takes and you have 1000% better and more nuanced takes than all of Twitter and I greatly appreciate it! The takes over there regarding Liliana and the gods are just wild and you bring some much needed sanity to the content I see

Thanks! I hope you don't mind because I've been thinking about this re: the Twitter takes but the thing about Twitter and Liliana specifically that I've seen is that there's this really bizarre fetishization of like, the fact that she is a (white) southerner (this also weirdly happened for Birdie though to a much lesser extent, and the person who spearheaded that wasn't even American so I have to assume this is a specific corner of Twitter Culture At Large). And like, here's the thing. It's true that fantasy tends to be very British in its accents, and it's also true that accents in a fantasy world are used to convey the same things we'd assume in our world - RP British for educated, southern American for rural, Cockney for rougher types, etc.

It's also true that laying the exact socioeconomic parallels from our world onto, say, Liliana and Orym (who reads to me as non-regional but I, like Liam, am from the Northeast originally) is a recipe for disaster. Or rather, it's not, but it is going to reaffirm your own biases, some of which are dangerous to reaffirm.

There was a popular post on Tumblr a while back, probably not long after Trump was elected, of someone talking about how they were convincing a relative with the confederate flag towards socialism by appealing to the idea of "isn't in unfair how uneven wealth distribution is and how a small group has so much control" and a number of people were rightfully like "uh, maybe you should focus on the racism" or "hey OP ask your relative who they think that small group in control is because I'm getting a really bad feeling they're going to say it's The Jews." And I feel that a lot of the empathy for Liliana from those spaces feels like that OP. Or in other words: I get that you see your relatives in Liliana. Unfortunately, I cannot help but see me and mine in Orym.

You see someone trapped by circumstance and desperation in a dangerous ideology. I see the fact that I haven't gone to a synagogue in easily 6-7 years without there being a security guard present and usually, the doors locked with someone looking through the window to let you in, and then in the sanctuary there's been an installation so that you can quickly bar all the doors in case an alarm goes off or you hear shots in the lobby.

I think there's a great case for seeing yourself in Imogen, who is in a painful struggle with the fact that her mother does love her very much but is in dangerously deep and has done a number of incredibly terrible and harmful things. That latter point is important, incidentally; I get that cult members sometimes rise through the ranks but all but the leader are being manipulated. But the fact remains that a brainwashed person can still commit atrocities, and in this story, they have, many times over. It's especially true because like...sure, plenty of people are like "I lost my relative to a cult and I just want them back and I couldn't harm them," but also, as we've seen, this cult can and will harm Imogen! Plenty of people are also like "yeah I gotta cut them off, it hurts but unfortunately my horribly bigoted and violent relative, while a victim of brainwashing, is a threat to me too." It's not even the full picture of the Temult side of things, let alone the picture that includes the Vanguard's victims.

I also think the Southern gatekeeping is unhinged because it's like. guys there's QAnon members and other cults across the country; the Confederate flag example above was actually notable in that OP wasn't even Southern so you couldn't even write the flag off as deeply misguided heritage but rather was explicitly being used as a hate symbol. It's awfully presumptive to assume all southerners have the same experience (especially since the Temults are portrayed, physically and in accents, as white southerners, not that the experiences of white southerners aren't also incredibly varied). It's awfully presumptive to assume that people find Liliana threatening because they have no personal experience with people like her; often, it's because they have all too real experience with people like her, and it says something even worse about you if you can say "but you guys, I see me and my family in Liliana" when people are telling you that they see them and their families in Orym. I would not, personally, publicly admit that one's empathy extends to the people who remind you of your family but runs out before it reaches their victims. Nor would I publicly admit that I assume everyone who disagrees with me clearly has never had personal experience with this topic.

I should also note that, as I've noted a number of times before, that these are fictional characters and not real people. Twitter seems to be really fucking bad at grasping that. Like, yes, this is the other thing; I do not think that OP should kill their Confederate flag-toting relative, whereas if Imogen did so to Liliana I'd be like "hell yeah." The former is a real person who I do hope gets deprogrammed, just, you know, maybe adjust those priorities; the latter is a fictional character in a story.

#answered #anonymous #if steel had a southern accent do you think people would feel differently about her? sound off in the comments i guess. #cr spoilers #it really is like. with the people who can't separate characters from real people...there's this assumption #that everyone who doesn't agree with them lacks the same experiences or is bigoted #don't like liliana? well it's because you're not southern. don't like laudna? it's because you're neurotypical and straight and hate women. #notice how none of these carry within them any argument within the text? notice how they just rely on the assumption #that you can only understand things through direct personal experience and not like...thought and empathy? #that if you fit certain demographics you obviously Will hold these exact opinions bc clearly all nd people or wlw are a monolith? #it's like. yeah man i see why you have more sympathy for the vanguard than their victims...you think like a cultist even if you're not one #you say There's Those Who Understand And Have The Mandate of Heaven Because We're (southern or nd or queer or whatever) #and then there's Them The Ones Who Don't Get It And Never Will Bc They're Not Like Us (even though plenty of times...they are) #anyway. as always i am sorry that twitter sucking hurts the careers of countless creatives #but i think it does foster this sort of no-nuance no-argument Me First thinking so. can't be too sorry. #long post

[cerise-on-top]

Could you write hcs for Nikolai and price with a shy s/o pls & ty

Yeah, of course! Though, I think reader is a bit more anxious than shy in this one, but what is shyness if not anxiety regarding social situations that isn't debilitating? Thanks for requesting!

Price and Nikolai with a Shy!Reader

Price: While I do believe that he thinks shy people aren’t his type, valuing someone who can stand up for themselves, speak their mind and aren’t afraid to be a bit more honest than they maybe should be, the heart chooses who it chooses. He values open and honest communication with his partner more than anything else, but when it seems like you can’t talk to him, no matter how much time he gives you, he rethinks his strategies. Since being stern with you only seems to make you more nervous, more apprehensive, he’d opt for being more gentle, always asking your honest opinion. He might ask further questions, though, if he thinks that the answer he received from you is a bit too short or barely, if at all, reflects what you’re likely thinking and you simply don’t want to hurt his feelings. Sure, he may be a natural leader, so having someone agree with you for once feels good, but having someone give you a piece of their mind, giving you a different point of view so you can see the faults and flaws in your plans, is essential for good workmanship. Price values you and your input, if he has to coax you into giving him a longer, more subjective answer, then he will. A relationship can only really work if both parties are trying to keep it upright in a healthy manner.

While he’ll try to get you to open up in any gentle way he can think of, if the two of you are on an outing, then he’ll speak to the other party for you if you really can’t reply. Price is a good speaker, he knows which words are appropriate in which situation. With his confidence as well, he can cover most conversations for you. However, I can see him trying to make you a part of it anyway, regardless of whether you’re talking to your friend or his working colleague. Being included in a conversation can feel nice, after all. Besides, it might help you in getting out of your shell a bit. Despite absolutely hating making decisions for you, if you really can’t decide on something small, such as which burger to get or whether or not you should buy that lovely sweater, he’ll take the burden off of you if there are people around. But on bigger things that have a greater impact on your life he’ll simply consult you, give you all the potential outcomes he can think of and which effect they may have. It’s not his place to take your life into his hands like that.

Shyness can stem from insecurities, and he can tell when you’re not happy with yourself. It doesn’t matter if you’re beating yourself up over having said something stupid in a conversation earlier that day or if you think you’re not worth listening to or having around, he’ll reassure you that it’s quite alright. Hell, if you’re willing to listen to him, he’s more than happy to tell you an anecdote or two about how he has slipped up when talking to his superiors. It happens to anyone, and by tomorrow that person probably won’t even remember what you said anyway. Unless he had trouble following you or didn’t understand what you meant clearly, Price won’t call you out on not having made complete sense either since he knows you might not take kindly to it, but he’d never make fun of you for misspelling any word, mixing things up or, well, not making sense. Sure, severe misinformation he will correct you on if it can greatly impact something, but not if you have a hard time speaking with correct grammar or pronouncing words perfectly.

Nikolai: Nikolai has met so many people in his life, he can get along just fine with just about anyone, especially because of his relaxed mannerisms. You being shy really isn’t a turn off at all, it can make for amusing scenarios at times. If you get flustered easily he’ll have a field day with that. You start stuttering? You blush? Say some nonsense while your mind is going haywire? That’s so adorable. While he’ll try to not overdo it and keep you comfortable, he does want to have his fun from time to time. If you don’t want to voice your opinion, that’s fine, but he will always ask you for your input. Even if you’re not a fan of saying anything with other people around, if it’s just the two of you, and you’re more willing to talk that way, then he’ll whisk you away. You don’t wanna say what you think in fear of him judging you? He will tell you that it’s alright, regardless of what it is, because truth be told, he’s probably heard far worse things than your opinion on the borschtsch he made. He’s observant enough to know when you’re lying to him in order to not make him mad, but won’t continuously poke and prod at you to have you spill the beans eventually. He’ll ask again once, but if you still won’t budge, then he won’t force anything out of you.

Because of him leading a private military company, he also knows a thing or two about how to engage in a conversation and keep it going for a while. If you want to say something, then you’re more than welcome to do so, but he knows that a shut mouth catches no flies. Yes, he might ask you a thing or two that he might not immediately remember off the top of his head, but if you don’t wanna come out of your shell then he won’t force you to. If you do wanna be more open, however, then it’s different. In that case, he’ll try to include you in the conversations that aren’t too taxing and give you some practice on being more open and social. Like Price, however, he won’t make every decision for you. He doesn’t have the time for that, plus you have enough autonomy like that. However, he is more than happy to call the pizza place you usually order from or tell the waiter at the restaurant what you’d like, that’s not a problem in his eyes. If you find yourself growing increasingly uncomfortable in a situation, Nikolai will get you out of there. He’s just as good at making any conversation end on a pretty good note.

If your shyness stems from insecurities then he, too, will reassure you that you didn’t mess up that badly. No one ever listened to what you had to say? Unless you’re both starting to talk at the same time, he won’t ever interrupt you, giving you his full attention instead. What you say doesn’t make any sense? Mixed up some information? Nikolai might chuckle a bit if you say something along the lines of monkeys liking bananas because they’re both yellow, he’ll gently correct you too, but he won’t be mean about it. Not everyone can remember everything all the time, he forgets things too. Besides, it’s not like he cares all that much. Sure, you said some nonsense, but he can also assure you that he’s heard far worse things. Can and will tell you some anecdotes about what he’s been told as well, there are quite a lot. If you don’t take too kindly to him smiling about something nonsensical, he’ll apologize. Trust me, if you’re upset, he’ll know immediately.

#cod #cod x reader #john price x reader #price x reader #john price #cod nikolai #cod nikolai x reader #i still remember when my mother used to call me an “extremely shy person” #the first time I went to therapy the therapist told my mother and me that it sounded more like pretty bad social anxiety #I still think about that from time to time #so this is sort of based on my experiences with potential social anxiety #because apparently freezing up in fear when talking to a stern stranger apparently isn't normal #though in hindsight I talked to someone who wasn't stern or mean either and I sort of froze up as well #well c'est la vie I suppose

[onyourstageleft]

#dan and phil #weed #besties i am so high rn i am losing it #i took like one too many bong hits #started playing flight rising on the desktop computer bc it loads so much faster than my chromebook #opened youtube to have something on the second monitor #found dan and phil's fuckin lofi album??? #lost my absolute shit about it #went to post about it from tumblr mobile but wanted to make this meme to do it justice so pulled up a meme editor on my desktop #(the meme editor had so many advanced text options since when have meme editors come this far??) #anyway made the meme realized my phone is at super low battery so decided to just log on to tumblr to post it directly from the desktop #even though i'm nearly exclusively a mobile user now and have been for years #so i have to log in to tumblr and now i'm experiencing making a post from the desktop site while still pretty blitzed #is it firefox that allows me to edit the tags after i've typed them or is that a desktop thing now #oh shit do i have any extensions on #depending on what imported from chrome when i changed my browser like six months ago this may be some sort of extension #whatever it is im okay with it this is great #i'm having such a good time right now genuinely #also watched chappell roan's hot to go music video for the first time during an interlude in the whole meme making process #there is currently a restoration video playing in the other tab that's been going for 10 minutes while i've been making this post #this is me living my best life honestly #i need at least one person to acknowledge the journey of tags on this post if only so i know I'm not alone in knowing my experience

[synthetic-rust]

What they don’t tell you about autism is that it feels like you’re simultaneously one step outside of reality yet two steps too far into it at all times

#chatter #salt grain thoughts #autism #I truly don’t know what I’m explaining here #but this is what I feel like constantly when I’m inferacing with the world #too far away from it yet also too inmeshed in it at the same time #like I react to things with a weird sense of almost astonishment like I’m experiencing everything fresh for the first time every time #(I don’t literally go ‘woah’ or anything but the intensity of the thing never changes) #which can either be good or like most times overwhelming #it’s probably why I keep myself so zoned out a lot of time #… #might just be a me thing but this feels quite connected to how my brain works I guess #feels like my head is just never goddamn prepared to experience anything at all #which lends to the whole needing control over your environment thing with autism #gotta have some sort of expectation and consistency happening or else your nervous system might shit itself

[queenlucythevaliant]

I've listened to TTPD three times now, twice alone and once at a listening breakfast with friends! Thoughts:

I liked quite a lot of it, but I'm not immediately blown away.

Current favorite is "The Bolter," followed by "But Daddy I Love Him," "The Prophecy," and "Florida!!!" in no particular order.

I loved the breadth of feelings that the album addresses. You really get a sense of a whole emotional landscape.

It's in strong and compelling conversation with Taylor's whole body of work without being too excessively self-referential. "thanK you aIMee" is the notable exception.

A lot of the songs are overwritten: she uses $20 words in place of $2 words, repeats herself, and dulls the power of what works by surrounding it with a lot that doesn't. If we go by Coleridge's definition that poetry is the best words in their best order, then yeah. She definitely needs an editor.

However, none of the lyrics that people seem to be highlighting as "cringey" bother me at all. I've always loved Taylor's proclivity for small details, even strange or out-of-place ones.

I would really love to gently help Taylor out with her literary allusions. They're a long-standing struggle for her, and even going in I was a little worried for that aspect of the album based on the marketing. Could've been worse, but most of them could still stand to be a whole lot sharper.

The songs tend towards very consistent production and tempo. Whether you want to call that cohesiveness or homogeneity is a matter of opinion.

My great, secret wish for this album was that it would feature a bunch of orchestra/strings, which would've meshed great with the dark academia vibe. Clearly, I didn't get it. Oh well

#i had a weird experience listening to this album last night #in that somewhere between 'down bad' and 'fresh out the slammer' i was kind of convinced that i hated it? #i mean. i didn't but I was fully expecting to really love it. all of her albums save rep and lover have been love at first sight for me #and with rep and lover i could pinpoint very specific things i didn't care for and sort of circumvent them if that makes sense #whereas listening to ttpd i just kind of felt like i was losing my mind #it definitely won me back as i kept listening #plus i was able to articulate the particular criticisms i had #so I've definitely landed safely in 'i like it territory' #but I've yet to see anyone on my tumblr dash expressing anything like my experience #so i figured I'd share #tay tay #pontifications and creations

[thevoidmeows]

kiss <3

#frankenstein #clervalstein #victor frankenstein #henry clerval #clervenstein #frankenstein fanart #frankenstein or the modern prometheus #this is umm.. actually my first time drawing kissing.. so this was a fun experiment of sorts lol #<3 #void's art

[solarisgod]

Hi, starlights. ♡ We wish to provide a gentle reminder to you guys that you all are so amazing and wonderful regardless of anything and everything. We know the early 2024 has been rough for a lot of folks, including myself, but we wish to remind that many people, with us, are most proud of you for everything while as long as you're trying your best, then that will always be more than good enough. We hope for everyone that they will continue to make warm and happy memories with their friends and loved ones and comfort characters / muses over this year and more that will be as much kind and gentle to them as so deserved. It's always nice to see people be happy with their friends and muses through talking or writing / creating together. Just know that regardless of it all, none of us is ever alone and we are all most loved by many with the stars and trees and other remnants of love itself. Much love and light to you all. 💖✨

#𓁹 ༑ ࿐ྂ ⩇⩇ : ⩇⩇ ⚠︎ [ 𝙴𝚇𝙸(𝚂)𝚃 : 𝙶𝙾𝙳 ] * ‹ OOC . › #[ I feel so completely free and happy now from last night. ] #[ woke up and few minutes in I just smiled and laughed and feeling my beloved hugging me as I hold my comfort plushies and soft blanket ] #[ is one of the best experiences ever for me to have and cherish. ] #[ this is my second time I had this sort of moment. the first was Valentine's Day this month with my most beloved of the sun. ] #[ genuinely I hope you all get to wake up and fall asleep like this often. ] #[ it's moments like this that remind me that existing can be as kind and lovely as well ] #[ and I'm content and grateful enough to exist. ] #[ just thank you all once more for everything bringing the light in our life and everyone else's by just being kind enough. ♡ ]

[mokutone]

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ID:

In the first panel, we return to the red-hue'd dark room. Tenzō is curled into a tight huddle, and Kakashi sits beside him, only marginally more loose in posture. "So a lab with big, glowing tanks, dark hallways, and chemicals—ones that hurt to smell?" Kakashi asks. In panel two, Tenzō turns to give Kakashi a tense look, as though frustrated, or upset. "Is there any other kind?" He asks. In the third panel, we see Kakashi's face, and he looks tired. Kakashi starts to ask "Do you think that the lab may be why you're so shaken—" but is cut off by Tenzō in the fourth panel, whose face is pinched, and whose speech balloons are large, with bold text, as though he's snapping at Kakashi. "No," He says. "I'm not—" In the fifth panel, Tenzō inhales through his nose. In the sixth, he exhales through his mouth. In the seventh panel, Tenzō's shoulders have dropped, no longer high and protective around him. He is no longer looking at Kakashi. "I'm sorry," he says. "It's okay," Kakashi replies. Where the next panel would be, there's another image of bluegreen Tenzō, surrounded by the same noisy, grainy texture from the previous page. This Tenzō's hair is floating again, and he's turned away. All traces of anger are entirely gone, and if there is any expression on his face, it's more akin to sadness. "I had actually...considered that too," Tenzō says. "I was anxious going in, but..." /end ID

#my art #naruto #comics #yamato #tenzō #yamato tenzo #kakashi #this comic doesn't contain very many silly bits or jokes but the part where kakashi is like. describing orochimarus lab #and tenzō seems frustrated or annoyed and goes ''Is there any other kind?'' is sort of silly and makes me laugh #im not gonna clarify whether im implying that all labs are based off of orochimaru bc hes the first research scientist in naruto #or whether tenzō just assumes all scientific researchers do things that look like human tank experiments + kakashis just like ''ok sure'' #but i did just include that line to amuse me in an otherwise heavy comic. as well as to move on to kakashi suggesting the lab was a trigger #anyway. return of the blue tank tenzō