#This was supposed to be a short post how did it turn into borderline fanfic
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So this is a vampire Eddie Munson blurb. It’s a crossover between my fanfics Dimensions Of The Heart and Beauty Has Her Way. It’s my Stranger Things/IT crossover and The Lost Boys story. That’ll explain the mention of my OC Cheryl because she’s the main OC in Beauty Has her Way. So it’s a crossover within a crossover 😂 I do plan on introducing Eddie in Beauty Has Her Way but that’ll happen later, after I cover The Lost Boys story-line.
Anyways this blurb features my OC Alexandra Uris who is my other OC Gwen Tozier’s daughter. It takes place years later after Stranger Things Season 4 when everyone thought Eddie died. In this crossover story he turned into a vampire. He’s been living in Santa Carla with our favorite vampires and is a part of their group.
In the blurb Alexandra is eighteen and is at Santa Carla for summer vacation. Eddie runs into her and finds out who she’s related to.
Short but sweet. Enjoy! It was fun to write! If you guys like it maybe I’ll write another blurb.
Pairing: Eddie Munson x Alexandra Uris (Gwen and Stan’s daughter). This was supposed to read as a start of friendship between them but uh...I don’t know anymore. I’m a sucker for a vampire x human relationship. And also it’s Eddie! But it does complicate things since in post IT: Chapter Two, Alexandra is paired with Oliver (Ben and Beverly's son). But who’s to say Alexandra won’t have another potential love interest in her life?I mean Gwen did xD Sorry not sorry.
It took Eddie longer than he liked to admit to locate where that alluring scent was coming from.
Paul and Marko would have definitely given him major shit about it. Thankfully Paul was with David and Dwayne, and Marko was off somewhere with Cheryl doing things Eddie would rather not know, let alone, think about.
This new scent for some reason was familiar to Eddie but he couldn’t figure out why that was. Why did the scent (of citrus?) make him walk around the boardwalk like a mad man on a mission. The people around him were giving him odd looks as he lifted his nose into the air, deeply inhaling. Eddie didn’t give a fuck with how he was being looked at though. All he cared about was that tantalizing scent.
There was a slight floral taste in his mouth after each inhale he took. Despite not being a huge fan of floral scent, this one in particular made him determined to find the source of where it came from. It was borderline intoxicating and Eddie wondered if this was what Marko meant when he told him about meeting Cheryl for the first time when she had been human years ago.
Cheryl’s scent had caught Marko’s attention, and the reason why was because she ended up being Marko’s true mate. Was this now happening to Eddie? Was he smelling his true mate’s scent or was this just a person with mouthwatering blood, waiting to be feed on by him?
Eddie would only know once he’d locate the scent, and locate the scent he very well did. Of all places on the boardwalk the person’s zesty scent was coming from the vinyl shop. Vinyls to this day happened to still be popular with people, and he was glad about that. Even with all the new ways to listen to music, Eddie preferred listening to music as he did when he had been a human in the eighties.
Call him old fashioned but it was his preference. He wasn’t the only one who felt this way when it came to his vampire family.
The vinyl shop was familiar territory for Eddie and he felt ridiculous for not checking the place sooner. He walked in as if he owned the place, the employees already recognizing and leaving him be. After living so long in Santa Carla it sure felt like he was the owner.
Eddie nearly closed his eyes from bliss. The delightful tangy scent was so strong in the shop that there was no way of escaping it. Not that he wanted to do that, quite the opposite actually.
His eyes soon found the owner of the scent he’d been drawn to.
A dainty looking blonde girl around eighteen or so stood in between the aisle, going through the vinyls in front of her. She was wearing a black headband, pushing her hair away from her face revealing her beautiful dark brown eyes. Eddie noticed that there wasn’t a single blemish on her fair skin.
The girl’s hair only reached her shoulders, and yet there was still some bounce. Her outfit did indeed let him know that she wasn’t from Santa Carla. Eddie already figured this to be the case from her scent. It was a huge give away because had she lived in Santa Carla Eddie, him or one of his brothers, would have scoped her out already.
Her scent was too captivating to ignore. Now that Eddie was looking at her he realized that not only did she smell like sunshine in a bottle, she also looked the part.
As Eddie approached closer he saw just how much taller he was than her. Eddie stood at five feet ten inches. She must have been five feet two inches, at least. To his amusement Blondie here was shorter than Cheryl. He along with the rest of the guys liked teasing her about it.
Eddie licked his lips before speaking, and when the girl set her eyes on him he felt a slight burn in his throat from how close he was to her now.
“You looking for anything in particular?”
Blondie narrowed those beautiful dark brown eyes of hers. Unlike most of the girls he chatted up she wasn’t falling so quickly. There was no fluttering of the eyelashes, or even a blush coating her cheeks. She wasn’t even smiling at him. No instead she appeared guarded, and Eddie was finding that to be intriguing.
“Do you work here?” Blondie asked evenly, though Eddie could detect a bit of sharpness in her tone.
“Nah, just a regular customer.” Eddie told her with a grin. “Though I do like to help people with finding good tunes. You know? Lead them in the right direction. Some people just don’t know good music.”
Blondie stared at him, and he could tell she still didn’t trust him. Her dark brown eyes however did lessen a bit from harshness. “I think I can manage on my own.” She went on to say and then continued going through the vinyls in front of her.
“Yeah?” Eddie’s eyes wondered to her neck, taking another inhale. He tried being discreet about it. He wondered what it would take in order to convince her to follow him to a more secluded area in order to get a taste from her.
The girl’s answer was short. “Yup.”
“Why’s that?” Eddie asked hoping to get more out of her.
She let out a sigh, directing her eyes onto him again. “My mother’s a singer. I know my music.”
Eddie wasn’t expecting that but he went along with it. “Oh? Who’s your mom?”
Blondie kept her gaze steady on him as she answered. “Gwen Tozier.”
Eddie’s mouth almost dropped open like in a cartoon.
The girl saw his reaction and must have thought he was a fan. Her lips quirked, not quite a smile. “You’ve heard of her?”
“I sure have.” Eddie answered with a far away voice.
He knew exactly who Gwen Tozier was. He hadn’t seen Gwen in years and he hadn’t been in contact with her or anyone from his past life. Not even his Uncle Wayne. And why would he? Eddie was supposed to be dead.
Any information he did know about his past loved ones was minimal. He did know about Gwen’s singing career but nothing about her personal life. He didn’t like digging because it just brought sadness, and why be bummed when he was going to live on forever?
Eddie was considered to be dead by everyone in Hawkins after the battle with Vecna. As much as he wanted to tell everyone in Hawkins he hadn’t kicked the bucket, he knew he couldn’t. Because the truth was he wasn’t alive, not like them. He wasn’t human anymore. He was a vampire now. And he’s been living as a vampire for quite some time now.
It hurt but leaving Hawkins had been the best and smart move on Eddie’s part. He thought he left everything from his old life behind but now here he was talking to Gwen’s daughter.
Was Gwen also here in Santa Carla? What about Gwen’s husband? If there was one, Eddie just assumed she was married. And if so to who?
Who did Gwen decide to settle down and have a kid with? Was it Harrington? It had been years since Eddie set foot in Hawkins but he remembered how head over heels Steve had been for Gwen, and he remembered how Gwen felt for Steve. The two were in a bit of a rough patch during their battle with Vecna but not enough to officially end things between them in Eddie’s opinion.
So did they reconcile and marry? Eddie had so many questions.
The girl in front of him would give answers. Eddie was sure of that. And even though it probably was a bad idea to get involved with her he just couldn’t seem to stop himself.
“My name’s Eddie.” He introduced himself, sticking out his hand. When all she did was blink at him he laughed. “Come on, it’s just a hand. It’s not like it’s gonna bite you or anything.” He probably shouldn’t have made that joke considering he’d been planning on sinking his teeth into that soft neck of hers earlier.
Blondie stayed quiet for a long time. Eddie really thought she was just going to continue standing there, staring at him with those dark brown eyes of hers. Eyes, that he now realized, were like Gwen’s. But then Blondie let out a sigh, not exactly an annoyed sounding one. She briefly shook his hand. “Alexandra.”
Eddie repeated the name in his hand. Alexandra seemed like a fitting name for the daughter of Gwen Tozier. The girl he once considered like a sister. He certainly did love her like one.
“So Girlschool?” Eddie brought up after their handshake ended. He gestured to the vinyl Alexandra was now holding. “That’s who you were looking for?”
Alexandra nodded her head. Now that they introduced themselves she found it a bit easier to talk to him. Although her guard still remained up. It didn’t matter how good looking he was, she wasn’t about to end up on the news.
“Yeah, I’ve been wanting to buy another one of their vinyls. Girlschool is such an underrated band.”
Eddie smiled. Gwen used to say the same thing. In his mind he could picture them smoking together after classes, and talking about music.
Girlschool being one of the many bands mentioned by her. Eddie recalled her owning a Girlschool t-shirt. It had been loose on Gwen because unlike most of the girls at Hawkins High she liked dressing more for comfort. In Eddie’s opinion Gwen could have dressed in a potato sack back then and she’d still be considered cool by him.
Eddie looked over Alexandra, eyes gleaming. The same thing could be said about her if she ever decided to wear a potato sack too.
“Are you a fan of their music?” Alexandra asked him.
Eddie’s smile widened. “Actually yeah, a good friend of mine got me into them.”
Alexandra hummed. “Your friend must have good taste in music then.”
This time Eddie answered in a softer tone. “She does.”
Alexandra picked up on the softness as she stared at him. Eddie was taken back in time yet again.
Those dark brown eyes, they were so Gwen. Especially under the shop’s light. Eddie knew right then and there that no harm would come to Alexandra. Not by him, and certainly not by his brothers. He’ll have to make that perfectly clear to them.
Eddie already knew that Cheryl would at least help him if any of the guys would cause trouble. He could count on Cheryl with about anything really. She was kind like that. Honestly it was hard for Eddie to think of her as a vampire because of how much love she held in her undead heart.
Actually, and this wouldn’t be the first time he thought it, even telling Cheryl, but his vampire sister did have a lot of qualities that made Eddie think of Gwen...and now here he was conversing with Gwen’s daughter.
Eddie’s tongue traced the inside of his teeth, glad his fangs were currently hidden. Alexandra’s scent hadn’t lost its allure whatsoever.
Yeah, on the downside Eddie lost a meal but it wasn’t like he could drink her blood. Eddie could already picture an older looking Gwen scolding him. That would be a huge no and Eddie would feel guilty, something he tended not to feel a lot these days. Thanks vampirism. But even though he just met Alexandra, Eddie already knew he wouldn’t harm a single strand of her beautiful blonde head.
Now on the upside finding someone else to feed from would be easy. This was Santa Carla after all. But he’d look for a meal later. Right now Eddie wanted to focus on Alexandra.
Talking to her made Eddie think back to the times he spent with Gwen all those years ago.
It made him feel human for a moment there. And it was a feeling he missed more than he thought.
Okay Blondie...
Eddie let out a low laugh when Alexandra tilted her head at him, finding her puzzled expression to be cute.
What else are you going to make me feel?
#beauty has her way#dimensions of the heart#crossover#the lost boys#blurb#eddie munson#alexandra uris#vampire eddie munson#gwen tozier daughter#oc#i had way too much fun writing this#i am a sucker for vampire eddie and the lost boys#cheryl rivers#marko#paul#david#dwayne#stranger things
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Omenstuck Act 2 Bonus Content
Hello! Here’s just some extra bonus content from the pretty weighty upd8 I posted to my fanfic Omenstuck today (for Chapter 4: Act 2 specifically). A lot of background info went into it that I’m not going to get much occasion to use, so I’m doing what any self-respecting writer would do and dumping it here instead. Obviously has huge spoilers for Omenstuck so if you haven’t read the upd8s from today, don’t look. Hope the readmore holds on mobile, and there are some images below, too. Enjoy!
So for starters, I’m going to post the little cheat sheet that I had on hand for remembering all the characters’ assigned blood colors, Trollian handles, god tier titles, and quadrants (both filled and experimented with):
In order, here’s what we’ve got:
Crowley. Blood: burgundy. UN: anthomanicCaduceus. GT: Rogue of Life. Quadrants: Aziraphale (matesprit), Eric (auspistice, unwitting) and Hastur (other leaf of auspisticism quadrant, unwitting). Lusus: snake
Eric. Blood: brown. UN: coneyCloning. GT: Heir of Time. Quadrants: Auspistice to Crowley and Hastur (unwitting); Uriel (auspistice between arguing Erics, short-lived). Lusus: rabbit
Beelzebub. Blood: yellow. UN: carrionTyrant. GT: Prince of Rage. Quadrants: Dagon (moirail), Gabriel (kismesis). Lusus: giant fly
Ligur. Blood: lime/red (vacillating glitch). UN: guanineChameleon. GT: Sylph of Space. Quadrants: Hastur (moirail), Michael (kismesis). Lusus: chameleon
Hastur. Blood: olive. UN: amphibiousGrunt. GT: Knight of Breath. Quadrants: Ligur (moirail), Eric (auspistice, unwitting) and Crowley (other leaf of auspisticism quadrant, unwitting). Lusus: frog
Dagon. Blood: jade. UN: aquaticTaskmaster. GT: Witch of Mind. Quadrants: Beelzebub (moirail), Sandalphon (matesprit, short-lived), Metatron (kismesis, one-sided crush). Lusus: lungfish
Aziraphale. Blood: teal. UN: aetherialAntiquarian. GT: Thief of Doom. Quadrants: Crowley (matesprit), Michael (auspistice, coercing) and Sandalphon (other leaf of auspisticism quadrant, coercing). Lusus: ??? (dragon, owl?)
Michael. Blood: cerulean. UN: tenebrousAgent. GT: Seer of Void. Quadrants: Uriel (moirail), Aziraphale (one leaf of auspisticism quadrant, coerced) and Sandalphon (other leaf of auspisticism quadrant, co-conspirator), Ligur (kismesis). Lusus: ??? (tbh spider would still fit here)
Sandalphon. Blood: indigo. UN: toughenedCrusader. GT: Page of Blood. Quadrants: Michael (auspistice, co-conspirator) and Aziraphale (other leaf of auspisticism quadrant, coerced), Gabriel (moirail), Dagon (matesprit, short-lived). Lusus: ??? (Possibly musclebeast)
Uriel. Blood: purple. UN: celestialAureate. GT: Maid of Heart. Quadrants: Michael (moirail), Eric (mediated between two of his arguing selves, short-lived). Lusus: ??? (sea-goat still viable)
Gabriel. Blood: violet. UN: gregariousArchangel. GT: Bard of Hope. Quadrants: Sandalphon (moirail), Beelzebub (kismesis). Lusus: ??? (seahorse or shark)
Metatron. Blood: fuchsia. UN: communicantGodhead. GT: Mage of Light. Quadrants: object of one-sided pitch crush from Dagon. Lusus: Horrorterror from Beyond (Gl’bgol’yb, probably)
Here’s the shipping chart of what this madness looked like:
Solid lines for established or longer-lasting relationships, dotted lines for either crushes or experiments that didn’t pan out. Crowley, Eric, and Hastur’s auspisticism is dotted because it’s not a consciously-thought out relationship that’s actually been defined so much as a convenient social contract that keeps Hastur from killing Crowley by distracting him with a multitude of Erics, which makes it a pretty functional auspisticism, actually.
Some notes:
- If you’re thinking that the blood colors and god tier titles don’t exactly fit, you’re right, but there’s a reason, and we’ll get to it in future chapters of Omenstuck. Maybe one day I’ll do the thing proper and give them all more accurate classpects and blood colors, but I think I did pretty well, given everything.
- This means that it was Hastur and Ligur’s jobs, as the Knight and Space players, to breed the Genesis Frog, which creates each new universe, and that tickles me to the bone.
- Ligur’s whole situation is a nod to both Good Omens and to Homestuck; for a bit I entertained making Crowley the hemo-mutant that Karkat is, but thought he fit best lower on the totem pole (on his belly he shall crawl and all that). Canonically, Karkat’s bright red human-like blood is a mutation off of an old hemospectrum caste, the limebloods, and it tickled me to think of Ligur occupying both the limebloods and the red mutation that spawned from it, as a nod to his color-changing in Good Omens and his affiliation with chameleons. Also, apparently it’s the guanine in their skin that makes chameleons change color, which is what the G in Homestuck pesterchum handles stands for (bc the chats are all supposed to represent DNA strands that make up each Genesis Frog that creates each new universe), so it came together kinda perfectly. If Ligur ever was in a pesterlog, I was going to code it so his lines would alternate colors, but it didn’t pan out that way.
- Was it overly simplistic to cast Hell as the lowbloods and Heaven as the highbloods? Yes. But there are two reasons for this, one of which I can’t say because spoilers, one of which I will freely admit, which is that I got tired and just simplified where I could because I was already putting more effort into backstory that turned out to be less relevant than I thought once I finally got the dang thing written.
- In the bowels of my Instagram there is a doodle of Gabriel with the traditional Bardic codpiece and an expression to match, but I didn’t keep it in canon. It is definitely there in spirit and more loving detail will be paid attention to it if I ever go back and do a proper Homestuck troll AU.
- There was a subplot I discarded when thinking of the quadrant entanglements that involved Dagon hooking up with both Sandalphon and Michael in a redrom way and that being one of the catalysts for the bloodbath at the end, because I adore Dagon/Michael and wanted to go there first but she was already appearing so much, and I remember reading about Dagon/Sandalphon once in a fic I wish I could remember off the top of my head and it was so bizarre I adored it. Ultimately I stuck with Dagon and Sandalphon having a redrom fling, because why not.
- Dagon was also going to have a whole Thing against Metatron that boiled down to her having vestigial seadweller traits and being jealous of an actual seadweller that didn’t do his heritage credit, but Metatron was such a non-entity that it didn’t feel relevant to bring up, with so much already getting crammed into this upd8.
- Gabriel and Eridan have some eerie synergy and that’s a hill I’ll die on.
- Uriel was supposed to have a bigger part, too, delving into how they fit into the whole purpleblood Mirthful Messiahs cult and how they use their paint to emphasize their vitiligo (inspired by their canonical pretty gold face markings), but once again...not enough room, not enough interaction with Crowley or Aziraphale. They were either going to be a huge part of it, or eschew it entirely in favor of worshipping Metatron and possibly Metatron’s eldritch lusus instead, but eh. Roads untraveled. I also didn’t doodle their facepaint while I was doing my concept sketches/brainstorming activities so I just let it be.
- The whole Michael and Sandalphon using a heavily manipulative auspisticism to blackmail and control Aziraphale was a concept I had from the beginning, but when I wrote the scene, it actually shook me up a lot; Auspisticism is one of the platonic and weirder quadrants in Homestuck, but it didn’t hit me until I had written it how that particular dynamic could be exploited and turned into something kinda borderline abusive, if not outright abusive (I’m trying to be more careful in how I apply the word so I don’t know for sure if what I wrote counts as fully abusive, or just a super bad time). To be honest, in all the Homestuck fics that ever were, I don’t think I ever read a single one that described what I did in this fic (and RAPE MENTION TW a part of me that is forever struck by my friend’s fic that described a brutal pale rape, as in forcing the usual nonsexual markers of the pale quadrant on an unwilling victim, was worried that I had written ashen rape, which was NOT where I wanted to go; after worrying about it to friends and sleeping on it, I don’t think I quite went there, but the implication that it COULD happen is going to haunt me for a while).
- I did want to get more detailed with a lot of things, like Crowley and Aziraphale’s influencing and talking with humans, and how it was affecting things like their vocabulary and how they saw the world, but it was just too much to tackle in any great detail.
- the whole thing where Crowley uses his god tier powers to steal Life energy from his fellow stranded trolls and makes plants that could potentially feed them one day? Totally unexpected. I did a LOT of refreshing myself on the classes and aspects of god tiers when I was doing the groundwork for this part of the fic, but it didn’t strike me that that was a thing Crowley could do until I was already writing it. And maybe Aziraphale should’ve been a little more horrified by it, but Crowley’s right, they ARE immortal now. Also the whole “taking Life energy and redistributing it among allies” thing probably wasn’t meant to be interpreted as “puts the other trolls in the Mood for quadrant hookups” but it was too hilarious a coincidence to ignore. Life needs things to live, as a wise internet dnd player once said, and when you’re the last of your species, you’ve gotta do what you can to propagate (even if it’s functionally impossible to restore your species, since there’s no Mother Grub to donate slurry to and no ectobiological lab to make ectobabies from. God loves a trier). Does that make all the hookups dubious consent, since weird Life magic was involved? I don’t think so, I think it just accelerated what was already present, but I’ll leave that to y’all to judge.
- Crowley was actually supposed to be the one to die. It said so in my notes. It was a whole Thing, Crowley getting speared or shot or whatever and looking at Aziraphale like “ha I got this one better luck next time”. But then I made Aziraphale a Thief of Doom, which was originally a joke to myself about how he hoards books (Thief players are hoarders and Doom can represent rules or systems), and then he got all contemplative and hit ME back with “no, no, sister, you made me a Thief of Doom, I’m gonna steal this death meant for Crowley and keep it all to myself, and there’s nothing you can do about it.” And he was RIGHT. I can’t believe I’ve killed Aziraphale THREE TIMES now. And I completely forgot about how god tier players are also immortal from being killed unless the death is Heroic or Just until, again Aziraphale reminded me by pushing Crowley out of the way--therefore making his death to sacrifice himself for his friend and beloved Heroic. I played myself in every possible way. Checkmate, brain. (As for what that means in future chapters, stick around, it’s only gonna get weirder, but Homestucks who are puzzled at the inclusion of Dream Shards rather than Dream Bubbles are encouraged to draw some conclusions of their own.)
I think that’s all I wanted to talk about, so have a doodle of Michael with her Seer hood drawn for funsies.
See y’all later! Feel free to send me an ask or a comment or whatever if you have any questions or just wanna talk about this madness I’m creating!
#good omens#omenstuck#quilly writing#quillartist#quilly writing: director's cut#oof y'all i did so much weird work on this#feels good to have it all out there
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10 Year Picrew
tagged by @cheesedemarco so i might as well do this hjskgjksjfjgk thanks bro 💕
2010
~2nd grade, 7-8 yrs old
- loved or thought they loved the color pink Wholeheartedly
- cats made Everything better, thought they might be part cat and loved to imagine that they were because they grew up around cats
- i legit don't know how no one thought "hm, something is Off with this one" but no one picked up on them being Different other than the kids smh so i got picked on a bit
- sisters kept asking if they were gay because they had a fixation on katy perry's "i kissed a girl". did not quite know what being gay was.
- put into a gifted program, got confused, never showed up to classes unless the teacher showed up to get them but thinking back was probably supposed to just leave
- like 2 close friends and that was It
- emotionally invested in binging animal planet docuseries'
- wants to be a vet when they grow up
- lots of really Weird ideas that thinking back on now just resulted in spending time alone and thinking or playing alone
- attention seeker :))) didn't receive any :)))))))
- "why are boys and girls treated so differently, i don't understand?? what makes me a girl??"
- polo.... ticks???
- first time cutting their hair "short" (bob cut, just above the shoulders, Loved It and then Hated It, wanted the mako mori haircut despite mako not existing yet)
- first signs of anxiety showed up around this time
2015 (pt. 1)
6th-7th grade, 12-13 yrs old
- sad emo bitch, honestly
- melodramatic as fuck, i would not be friends with them now if i knew them
- attention seeking at its worst
- anxiety at its worst
- lots of pushing people away and isolating from friends in fear of making things worse for them having to see me emotionally compromised in any way
- lots of having to talk people down because they managed to make friends with probably over half of the school's Depressed Children population and had even more online
- first boyfriend, didn't turn out hjskgjskg peer pressured into a few firsts actually
- loved loved loved black veil brides and h*talia/anime in general, do not come for me and do not ask for details, i will deny ever existing during this time period
- first discovers the lgbtq community
- first makes an instagram account
- first discovers what fandom and fanfics are
- first writes fanfics like a fucking madman, literally could pull three short fics out of their ass every day, edited and everything, but never posted them out of fear of rejection and criticism
- really REALLY wants to be an author but doesn't have any kind of faith in themself or their ability
- makes friends who like their writing and latches onto them for the next Ever (still friends with them now 🥰)
- couldn't manage their obsessions with fiction and it negatively affected their life in a few ways
- first girlfriend, still miss her as a friend, but didn't turn out because they still had a lot of Emotions they didn't know how to process
- joins kik and makes a lifelong friend and qpp :))
- finally let themself say fuck. come on bb u can do it just not in front of ur parents ok?
- "i HATE politics that shit is SO ANNOYING and i will NEVER be political ùmú rawr xd >:((((("
- maybe like two other girlfriends or so, was Really Just Going Thru It, Wanted To Find Themself (and also didn't know how to say no to people in fear of disappointment)
- noticable difficulty keeping track in school compared to before
- miles mckenna
- "wait, you can trans your gender?"
2015 (pt. 2)
7th grade, 13 yrs old
- still probably wouldn't be friends with them but better than before
- mom upon being asked to let me cut my hair in the "ellen cut": BUT YOU'LL LOOK LIKE A LESBIAN???
- my reaction, still partially in the closet: YES. AND???
- technically out as genderfluid and pan, did nothing to actually insinuate they wanted to shift what pronouns people used for them because "Oh But What A Burden That Would Be On Others :("
- happier with themselves but still Going Thru It because they didn't know how to put their feelings into words yet
- also a constantly fear of being perceived as annoying or a nuisance
- touch aversion appeared out of seemingly nowhere, got worse over the course of the next two years or so
- sleep deprivation ×1000000000
- more school difficulties,,,
2020
high school senior, nearly 18 yrs old
- successfully transed their gender... mostly. almost 2 years on t. will probably never be out as nonbinary to most family. but at least they have a mullet-in-progress
- been in therapy for somewhere over 2 years, maybe close to 3??
- somewhat learned how to say no and stand up for themself and has removed toxic people from their life successfully :))
- actually has some semblance of confidence!!! you go bitch!!! comfortable in their body after t once they realized their remaining dysphoria was almost strictly social
- emotionally good but physically and mentally running on fumes and fixations
- has come to realize that they probably have undiagnosed adhd and that their therapist needs to get bent because he keeps telling them "no" and then after they talk to him about it he goes "ok maybe..." with no real answer, thanks roger 💕
- overly friendly???? just wants to make people smile and this time knows that if they don't that it's okay because at least they got to smile about it
- fixated HEAVILY on pacific rim and iasip, and torchwood (but mostly just on charlie day and burn gorman BECAUSE of pacific rim hjskgjskjgkahgkg)
- trying to get back into writing fics so hard but things just do no be coming as easily as they once did
- "i type in all lowercase because i FUCKING HATE CAPITALISM"
- probably a maoist idk i'm still Learning new things every day
- manages to actually run a tumblr blog and make friends without having borderline panic attacks??? fun times y'all
- extremely grateful to see how far they've managed to get :)
sorry for uhhhhh putting my life's story on here LMAO anyway. i tag ummmmm anyone who sees this and wants to do it!!! here's the picrew!!! have fun!!!
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201X in Review: A journey of cringe and regrets
Realizing 2020 is really close and wanted to look back at the second (full) decade I’ve actually been alive for. I feel like either a huge amount of stuff has happened, or basically nothing’s happened, but there’s no middle ground.
2010:
Cringy 2010 photo: High school prom (in middle, dark green dress and...a face)
Junior in high school.
Had my first-ever Real Boyfriend(TM). (Pictured in above cringy photo.)
Had just ended an extremely toxic 12-year relationship and was still figuring out how to have friends.
Chemistry fucking SUUUUUCKED and I don’t miss it.
Had a super intense love for Megamind. I saw it minimum of 4 times in theaters and had a major crush on that blue lil nerd. (Began a personal grudge against both Tangled and Despicable Me for taking away its deserved spotlight, a resentment I have not yet gotten past 10 years later.)
Most regrettable 2010 memory: Getting way too intense about a new boyfriend and lowkey abandoning my friends. Not cool.
Most awesome 2010 memory: I have friends from back then I still love and keep in touch with (despite my abandoning them for a bit there). That’s pretty dang awesome.
2011:
Cringy 2011 photo: High school graduation with one of the most beautiful women in existence. (We’re still friends, and she’s still gorgeous.)
Graduated high school! (Gym fucking SUUUUUCKED and I don’t miss it.)
Fell in love with the college that was supposed to be a “safety school” and didn’t apply anywhere else, which means I can brag about having been accepted into 100% of the colleges I applied to.
Started at Ithaca College -- don’t say “it’s gorges,” it gets so old so fast -- and had a miserable first semester and an incredible second.
Started getting . . . uncomfortably involved in religious groups. (I mean, I’d been doing that since I was a kid, but it got kicked up to 11 in college.)
Most regrettable 2011 memory: Dressed as a “g***y” for Halloween. Fucking yikes.
Most awesome 2011 memory: Figuring out what I want to be when I grow up.
2012:
Cringy 2012 photo: Modeling first successfully completed knitting project. With bamboo needles because Ithaca is a hippie paradise.
Learned how to knit, entirely out of boredom in long lectures.
Technically started my tumblr experience, though it was only for a few months while I worked through some Shit by being in love with Loki from the Avengers (and THiddleston in general). Stayed on here just long enough to discover Achievement Hunter and Rooster Teeth, and never went back.
Broke up with first-ever Real Boyfriend(TM) and handled it so well I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder.
Got very deep in a religious group at IC, which was . . . not very healthy and could perhaps not inaccurately be described as “cultlike.” (I owe a major apology to everyone who knew me back then; I was very much a major bitch.)
Despite the previous two bullet points, this was the best year of my life up until that point. I lived next door to my two best friends in college, loved my major, and pretty much was confident that I had everything figured out.
Most regrettable 2012 memory: Writing a fan letter to Tom Hiddleston, which included a photo of me and my phone number. I was convinced my charm and wit would totally make him fall in love with me.
Most awesome 2012 memory: Pretty sure this is the year my love affair with RiffTrax began, too. I had a posse and we’d go see live shows together.
2013-2014:
Cringy 2013 photo: A blanket that I made and sent to Jennamarlbes for her dogs, because it was too small for people. Pretty sure it showed up in a video at one point.
Cringy 2014 photo: My awesome college roommates and I dressed up to give out candy to people’s dorms on Halloween. Reverse trick-or-treating: very fun, always recommended.
HA. So much for having anything figured out.
I don’t actually remember much of this period in my life, because I was navel-deep in a major religious crisis that would continue until . . . a couple months ago, basically? There was a lot of freaking out and trying to reconcile culty fundamentalism with the freewheeling pinko that lived deep inside and was trying to break free.
Lots of therapy, though. And med adjustments. Eventually figured out something that worked. Free campus counseling was the bomb though.
I do remember living in an apartment and cooking for myself for the first time, and also playing a lot of tabletop games with my roommates. (Also drinking. Lots of drinking.)
Oh shit, was this when I started that Drunk Librarian blog? I was trying really hard to be The Nostalgia Critic for books (ew), but I remember having a lot of fun with that. That was when my lifelong vendetta against John Green began.
Most regrettable 2013-2014 memory: Did I mention that the blanket I sent to Jenna included a letter? Did I mention that letter included some bible verses I thought she would appreciate????
Most awesome 2013-14 memory: Started a knitting club. It was just like 4 people hanging out and not knitting.
2015:
Cringy 2015 photo: Me being emaciated, makeup-smeared, and proudly showing off a collarbone piercing. That piercing has since rejected, but was in fact cute af.
Graduated college! Summa cum laude, bitches. (And an unfinished minor because I didn’t feel like taking the one (1) class I needed to graduate.)
Started library school and moved back home with parents. That was . . . an adjustment.
Changed library school “majors” halfway through my first year, after a lot of soul searching and panic attacks.
Had a short but catastrophic relationship with a man 9 years older than me (who was my pastor. Awkward). Religious crisis continued.
Got really skinny and hot because I was too miserable to eat. Dyed my hair red for the first time and looked basically like Ariel.
Discovered Party Hard and got really good at killing people.
Remembered how much I fucking love my parents’ dog:
Most regrettable 2015 memory: Being that person who “thought I could change him.”
Most awesome 2015 memory: Did you see how cute that dog is? His name is Oscar, after Oscar the Grouch.
2016:
Cringy 2016 photo: I had this huge thing for 1950s dresses for a while, complete with petticoats.
Grad school continued.
Religious crisis continued.
Therapy happens to deal with Things, is quickly dropped due to money and lack of shrink-chemistry.
Discovered a dumb little web cartoon with a teensy fanbase and no love for my favorite ship. Began work on a fanfic to correct this.
Finished a long-form fanfic for the first time in my entire life.
Virtually abandoned every other fandom to hyperfixate on this for the rest of my life.
Got super political, then super depressed. Quit Facebook because I realized I hate everyone I’m FB friends with.
Discovered Stardew Valley and never got anything done ever again.
Found Tumblr again (needed it to keep in touch with my first-ever beta reader, @raenbowsofficial) and turned into fandom and politics trash.
Most regrettable 2016 memory: Man, was I cocky about that Hillary Clinton winning the election. Oops.
Most awesome 2016 memory: I mean, CAMP CAMP. Obviously.
2017:
Cringy 2017 photo: My first day of work as a very bisexual-in-denial librarian.
Finished grad school and became a certified librarian (in NYS anyway)!
Got a job at a local college, including my own office!
Shaved half my head!
Moved into my own apartment and adopted a cat, fulfilling a goal over 7 years in the making!
Became friends with two of the most important people I’ve ever met. Visited one of them on a semi-impromptu 9-hour drive to Virginia and met IRL for the first time. First ever all-night solo trip, one of the best days of my life.
This might’ve been the year I got the VFD eye tattooed on my ankle, though I can’t swear to that.
Was part of my first long-form tabletop RPG with friends from college (and friends-of-friends). Was very emotional and also quite gay.
Rediscovered Megamind thanks to excellent fanfiction. That shit is still great.
Currently the best year I’ve ever had.
Most regrettable 2017 memory: I should’ve attended my graduation from library school instead of deciding it didn’t matter. It mattered a lot.
Most awesome 2017 memory: Seeing the-artist-formerly-known-as-ciphernetics in person.
2018:
Cringy 2018 photo: Um, apparently we don’t get one, because there’s an image limit to these posts. Lame.
Was laid off and took 6 months to find another full-time job. Spent most of that time depression-napping.
Said full-time job lasted 4 months before I ran like my shoes were on fire, because it was morally . . . suspicious and left me borderline suicidal.
Got very fat because I was too miserable to stop eating.
Had to cut my hair so I would look “professional.” Looked like my ex-boyfriend. My mom said I “looked like a Trump supporter.” To-date the meanest thing anyone’s ever said to me.
Moved back in with my parents due to not-having-job-ness (got to bring the cat, though).
Lost parents’ health insurance and had to pay for my own. Discovered health insurance is ridiculously expensive.
Became super left-leaning thanks to the power of Tumblr and Youtube (and possibly that super expensive health insurance thing).
Writing came to a virtual standstill, though I managed to organize and actually finish participating in all of Gwenvid Week (for the first time).
Two weeks after quitting the job from hell and three weeks after moving back in with the parents, I was offered my old position back. Accepted. Was once again a college librarian.
Most regrettable 2018 memory: Knowing I didn’t want the nightmare job and accepting it anyway. Might’ve been the only choice, but it caused a lot of unhappiness.
Most awesome 2018 memory: The day I was laid off, I hopped on a plane and went to fucking Disney World. Because why not?
2019:
Started work again. Finally (mostly) stopped having panic attacks about being fired/laid off out of the middle of nowhere around 8 months into new job.
Fewer paper cuts than expected.
Accidentally became associated with dinosaurs at work, despite not having any sort of special affinity for dinosaurs.
Did develop a deep and abiding affinity for octopus. Also elephants.
Took cat to doctor. Cat didn’t enjoy doctor. Cat is now 8 lbs. and 14 oz. She is big girl.
Rediscovered the joy of reading again. Newly discovered that mysteries actually can be pretty awesome, and read barely anything else all year. (Personal recommendations: The 7 1/2 Deaths of Evelyn Hardcastle by Stuart Turton and Waisted by Randy Susan Meyers.)
So. Many. Youtube. Video. Essays.
Discovered Stardew Valley mods and eventually broke 3k hours of playtime.
Napped frequently. Panicked less frequently. It’s a step in the right direction.
Most regrettable 2019 memory: This post sure is long and over-share-y, isn’t it? Didn’t even include a cut so you could more easily scroll past my face. Inconsiderate, is what that is.
Most awesome 2019 memory: This one is pretty good. Right now.
2020:
???
Profit.
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Whatever, Shitbird - Stranger Things fanfic
ffnet link / ao3 link
Summary: Billy and Max shared a bedroom for some weeks when their parents married. Billy's bedroom.
Characters: Bily Hargrove, Max Mayfield, Neil and Susan Hargrove
Fully and solely inspired by @kakademona 's post . Billy is 11 and Max is 7
.
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"Of course you'll have a room of your own. It's just for a short while, couple of weeks at most. Me and your mother just need to handle a few things and we'll be set."
"Sure, it's alright," she replies, a soft shrug making the cloud of orange curls even puffier and messier as they bundled over her shoulder.
"Yes, sweetie, you'll have your space in no time. You'll love your new bedroom, you'll see."
"Yeah, I can't wait."
"Okay, then go settle in, Max."
Of course she'll have a new bedroom. Of course they tell her that. No one tells him. It's his room he's giving up. But of course no one tells him anything. It's just his bedroom and his own space and his own bed that got rearranged and replaced so she can be comfortable. No one tells him he'll enjoy having a room for himself again soon.
Billy is standing by the corridor with his arms crossed in front of his chest, a borderline pout on his face that he'd never admit to actually be showing. He glares at the tiny orange ball of a girl as she looks at him and passes by his side to the corridor, heading towards the bedroom. Billy has to physically fight the urge to not make her trip and sprawl herself on the floor.
"Billy, sorry for burging in and messing your room," Susan looks at him then, making him turn to her. He immediately frowns to hide the sting of fear he feels imagining she might've read the intention he had to push Max. He sees the woman smile softly and it makes him frown harder, but she's soon kept from adding anything else.
"Don't worry about it, Susan, you're not burging in," his Dad says matter-of-factly. "A bunk bed saves up space anyway, and it's a nice way for the kids to bond."
"Of course, but still..." she doesn't continue, only flashing another soft smile at him before Billy turns his back on them.
"Billy, leave your sister to settle in first," his Dad commands him, and Billy clenches his teeth so hard it hurts.
"What's there to settle? Won't it just be for a short while anyway?"
"Watch your language."
"I'm just gonna lie down, I won't get in her way," he manages to say, stepping to and quickly crossing the corridor before Dad can turn that command into something else, turning to his room where now he's not even supposed to be in without permission of some sort.
Max turns her head to the door the moment he opens it, stopping to stare back at him. There's an unsure look on her face, like maybe she's wondering what he's doing there. Billy looks at the monster in his room (no, not the stupid tiny girl, but that'd not really be that bad of a word either) and gets angry at it. Why did they bother to buy a bunk bed if it's only going to be a couple of weeks? Why not two separate beds? Why not simply not being there?
She kinda has already started to settle on the bottom bunk (the amount of 'settling' was placing a couple of books and a teddy bear on the bed), but Billy resolutely walks to the stairs and climbs them up as if to make a point, sitting on the harsh mattress and scowling at how close to the ceiling he was. It feels trapping, not as nice as he'd use to think bunk beds must be like, but it's the bed's fault, the girl's fault, the woman's fault, Dad's fault. The only thing special in a bunk bed is to have a high mattress though, so of course he's gonna have the top one, and he dared anyone trying to get him out of there now. Of course, he knows if Dad finds it'd somehow be better for Max, he'll give it to her and drag Billy down.
"I hope you don't mind I took the bottom one," Max says from under there.
"I'm older, so I'd get the top bunk anyway," he throws back at her. His reasoning was pretty crystal clear in his mind and his voice left no room for discussion.
"Uh, yeah. You're right."
"It's not gonna be for long anyway. Didn't you hear them? You'll have a fancy neat room all for yourself."
"So will you, right?"
Billy scoffs, wanting say some snarky reply but not really deciding on which he liked best, and by the time he does, it just feels awkward to say it.
He hears her move on the bed beneath his and Billy frowns and reaches the edge of the bed, bending over the low railing and sticking his head upside down to see her sitting down, looking at her backpack before turning her eyes up at him.
"What?" she asks, shrugging, but Billy can see her cowering slightly.
"Do you want the top bunk?"
"You're alright sitting there, aren't you?"
"Do you want it?"
"No," she waves her head. "I'm actually a bit scared of heights."
Billy scowls and clenches his teeth. Now he really wants to jump down, shove her up and pull off the stairs. He angerly straightens back up and throws himself on his back against the mattress instead. The whole bunk screeches slightly.
There's a pause of silence before Max speaks.
"Sorry I'm crushing into your room." Like her mother, Max says it and Billy gets angry even though he shouldn't, they're agreeing with the unfairness after all and he should be glad, but he's not used to that and so it just makes him mad. "I mean, I probably wouldn't like it much if I had to suddenly share my room with someone else. Specially if I was a boy... so... yeah."
"Yeah, it sucks," Billy tells her. He roughly tries to find a more comfortable position on the foreign mattress and makes the bunk bed screak again, then does it again because the sound is extremely annoying. "But there's nothing to do to change that, is there?"
The metallic squealing scructure finally goes silent when Billy has thrown both arms behind his head and stares at the ceiling so he won't have to stare anywhere else, to the cardboxes Dad has already set up on a corner by his surf board so he'll start packing. He doesn't want to. He doesn't want to pack and leave his bedroom and his house and just move to another one he doesn't know, to a different neighbourhood he doesn't know, that'll possibly be farther from the beach.
"Billy," Max calls him.
"What do you want?"
"I don't really like it either, okay? I was kinda doing great without a brother, you know?"
"Are you kidding me? You're not my sister," Billy throws at her, and he wants to be bad, wants to make her get mad and sad, wants to see if he hits a nerve. "When we move and you get your fancy pink bedroom and hang your Barbie posters, I don't want you near my bedroom ever again. Get it?"
They hadn't known each other for long yet, but for some reason he imagines the look on her face with perfect clarity, her orange eyebrows frowning in a little expression of hurt and confusion, like she's supposed to be a cute little carrot with dots on her face. He's almost tempted to peek again, but if he did, he probably would see defiance there as well, and he'd want to fight off that defiance.
"I don't like pink," he hears her say. There it is; defiance. He rolls on the mattress quickly and sticks his head over the railing again.
"Whatever, shitbird."
"I don't like Barbie's either."
"I said, whatever!"
"I don't want to be in your stupid room anyway."
"I won't have to put up with you for long anyway."
They glare at each other, the next accusation hanging by a threat but none of them really says it. Billy crawls on the bed and starts to climb down the steps, jumping the final two ones and quickly walking to the cardboxes, opening them and starting to throw clothes and the very few remaining toys he'd allow himself to keep now that he wasn't a little kid anymore, Max staring wordlessly at his back.
The sooner they moved and he at least got his bedroom back, the better.
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Pretty, Prettier, Prettiest (Prompto x Reader)
henlo, it me
my first post on this blog
my first fanfic after about 4 (???) years of not writing anything
i wrote this on a whim just hours after making this account
(haven’t been on tumblr in a couple of years either)
wow
it wasn’t supposed to be this long i jUST WANTED SOMETHING SHORT AND SWEET but i guess that didn’t happen
this is high school!Prom btw a.k.a. my sweet darling Sunshine
word count: 3k+, fluff with a bit of prom’s lowkey self-deprecation
‘She’s so pretty,’ is what Prompto thinks the first time he lays his eyes on you.
It’s at the arcade on one of Prompto’s after-school excursions with Noct when he catches sight of you. Your uniform tells him that you share the same school, but it’s clear that you’re in different classes due to the unfamiliarity of your identity.
Neon lights of the rhythm game you were preoccupied with illuminate your frame, but it’s the look of sheer glee on your face that really catches Prompto’s attention. There’s something about that grin of yours that Prompto can’t seem to shake off, even after Noct has already beaten him at the shooter game they came here to play.
“Hey,” says Noct, waving a hand in front of Prompto’s face. “You okay?”
Prompto blinks, Noct’s words snapping him out of his stupor. “H-huh?”
“I beat you twice now,” Noct tells him, “and I never beat you at this dumb game. Your aim’s off.”
Prompto isn’t one to toot his own horn, but there’s no denying that he is the absolute best when it comes to shooter games. He just never misses. Today is apparently an exception, and it’s all thanks to you.
“O-oh, sorry.” Prompto clears his throat before letting out a nervous chuckle. “I’m just distracted, I guess.”
“Yeah, distracted by a certain someone over there.”
Noct may have a reputation for dozing off and leaving an overwhelming amount of untidiness in his wake (Ignis would argue that “overwhelming” doesn’t even begin to cover just how much of a mess Noct’s living quarters are), but he’s anything but unobservant.
“What? No!” Prompto screeches as he flails around Noct. “I was not staring at that girl playing Guitar Hero!”
“I never said you were drooling over anyone playing Guitar Hero,” Noct retorts with a smirk. “I was actually referring to the Chocobo plushie at the prize station. But hey, don’t let me stop you from crushing on her.”
At this, Prompto blushes. “Noooct!”
It seems Prompto’s voice is much louder than he thinks because all of a sudden, you turn your attention towards him, having failed at the song you were playing on the arcade machine. It’s at this moment that Prompto can practically feel his heart stop, because when your eyes meet, it’s as if everything else vanishes.
Prompto can’t help but stare, his mouth left slightly ajar. He’s a big appreciator of beauty, after all, and gosh were you one work of art. His face burns all the more when you offer a small smile of acknowledgement before scurrying off with your friends.
“I…” he starts, gazing at you as you cramp yourself into a photobooth with your comrades. “I think I’m in love.”
Noct scoffs. “Get a grip.”
*
The next time Prompto sees you is during his lunch break a few days later. He’s making his way towards Noct’s desk (“I hope Iggy made a new batch of those tarts!”) when a small voice from the classroom doorway reaches his ears.
“Excuse me?” you call out, hoping to catch someone’s attention.
Prompto ignores the voice, thinking it wasn’t anything that required his presence. He’s nearly at Noct’s desk when someone hollers, “Yo, Argentum!”
Prompto turns, seeing one of his classmates beckon for him. “Yeah?”
“Someone’s looking for you.” His classmate motions towards the entrance, causing Prompto to direct his gaze towards the classroom doors. His eyes slowly widen when he realizes who it is that’s waiting for him.
It’s you.
Prompto gulps, already feeling his palms begin to sweat. What in the world were you doing here, looking for him of all people? The blond boy blinks once. Twice. He’s staring at you, dumbstruck, before he belatedly grasps that you’re still patiently waiting for him to approach you.
So that’s what he does. Slowly. Almost robotically. Prompto doesn’t know what to think, being too caught up in the reality that he is making his way towards you. What is he supposed to say? What did you even want from him in the first place? Did you feel a connection just as he had at the arcade? Was it love at first sight for you as well? Could you-
-wait. Maybe you noticed that he was with Noct that day at the arcade. You were probably just here to ask about his friend, weren’t you? That’s definitely the case. Why want him when you can have the Crown Prince of Insomnia? You’d probably be a better match with Noct anyway. You’re much too pretty to be with someone like-
“Prompto Argentum?” you ask unsurely as the boy in question finally reaches you.
“Ye-yeah…?” Did his voice just crack? Astrals above, he was reverting into a prepubescent teen right in front of you!
“Hi,” you say, offering your name and a hand to shake. “You’re friends with Prince Noctis, right?”
Prompto’s too caught up in the feel of your hand in his (‘So soft,’ he thinks dazedly) to register the words that came out of your mouth. “What?”
You clear your throat, ushering him outside for more privacy. “Prince Noctis — you’re friends with him, right? I think I saw him next to you a few days ago at the arcade…?”
Prompto’s heart drops. He was right. Of course you were here looking for Noct. Of course. He sighs dejectedly, unable to contain the frown that was now marring his freckled face. Running a hand through his hair, he says, “Yeah, Noct’s a buddy of mine. Why d’you ask?”
The subtle blush on your cheeks — as darling as it was — was a tell-tale sign that Noct was the apple of your eye. “Well…”
“Want me to put in a good word for you?”
“I’m sorry?”
Prompto manages to reel his frown into a pout. “You’re here because you wanna know how to get into his good graces, right? I mean, I can’t blame you. My best friend’s a piece of work!” Prompto’s trying to sound chipper, he really is, but he can already feel his heart breaking. He didn’t even get to start anything with you — not even a mere friendship — before handing you over to someone else.
“Um, well,” you stumble a bit with your words, and it’s here that Prompto detects what seems to be a hint of embarrassment. “I do want to know how to catch Prince Noctis’ attention, but it’s not for my sake.”
The tightness in his chest — a pressure Prompto didn’t even realize was there — suddenly loosens. He raises his brows questioningly. “It’s for whose sake, then?”
“My friend,” you answer. “She’s a sweet girl who’s got a massive crush on the Prince. I told her to just walk up to him and say hi, but she was pretty adamant for some sort of intel before making a move.” You fumble with the skirt of your uniform before continuing. “I remembered seeing the two of you hanging out, so I figured you would be the best source of information on our royal schoolmate.”
Prompto says nothing, too dumbfounded by the turn of events. So you didn’t have the hots for Noct? Does that mean that he, Prompto Argentum, might have a chance? ‘Don’t get your hopes too high, Prompto,’ he reminds himself, taking notice of how you’re squirming at his silence.
You perceive his lack of response as a signal to continue. “I know it’s kinda… weird, asking something like this of you, but you seem like a nice guy and an even better friend to the Prince. I don’t need to know anything personal about him, but it’d help if you could-“
“Sure,” Prompto chirps easily, already feeling more at ease thanks to the knowledge that you aren’t actually here for Noct. Well, technically, you are, but it’s not for your own personal purposes.
Your rambling is cut short. “Really?”
The look of surprise on your face is absolutely adorable. Prompto has to mentally remind himself not to squeal at how precious you are. “Really.”
You let out a sigh of relief. “Bless you.”
“So whaddya wanna know?”
You shrug. “Anything, really. What does he like? Favorite video games? Dislikes?” You take a step closer, dropping your voice to a conspiratorial whisper. “Boxers or briefs?”
Prompto chokes, not at your joke, but at how close you are. You smell like a dream. “Ex… excuse me?!”
Despite being caught off guard at your close proximity, Prompto can’t help but marvel at how delightful your laugh is. Such a beautiful sound is music to his ears, and it warms his heart knowing that he is the cause of your momentary happiness.
“I’m just kidding.” You wave your hand about, already beginning to contain your giggles. Prompto wishes he could hear more of it, though.
“I knew that,” he mumbles. “Well, uh… let’s see.” Prompto rubs his chin thoughtfully, trying to figure out what he can divulge without exploiting his best friend’s privacy. “He has a bit of a sweet tooth.”
“Really now?” You hum contemplatively. “I never would have guessed.”
“Yeah. Did you know that he hates veggies?”
You snort at this. “How old is he, seven?”
“On the inside, yeah.”
His answer makes you grin. “This is more than enough. Thank you, Prompto.”
Your hand latches onto his forearm, giving it an appreciative squeeze. The jolts of electricity he feels at your touch is both alarming and incredible at the same time. “My pleasure.” ‘Really, it was a pleasure getting to talk to you.’
“I hope you can keep this from the Prince though,” you state with a bite of your lip. “It might be awkward if he finds out I’m borderline stalking him, even if I’m doing it for someone else’s benefit.”
Your lip biting makes Prompto just want to kiss you now, but pouncing on attractive people just isn’t in his nature. He may not be royalty, but he’s definitely well-mannered. “As you wish, m’lady.” He bows jokingly, earning another soft laugh from you. “I have one question, though.”
“What’s that?”
“How’d you know who I am?”
“Oh.” Was that a blush returning to your face yet again? “That part was fairly easy.” Tucking a stray hair behind your ear — almost shyly, Prompto thinks — you say, “I just had to ask around for the name of the cute blondie who hangs around Prince Noctis all the time.”
You answer wasn’t one he was expecting. You… you think he’s cute? Surely Prompto must have misheard? Your words leave him speechless, so you take it upon yourself to fill the silence once more.
“Anyway, I’ve held you up long enough. Thanks again, Prompto! I really owe you one!”
Prompto’s gaze lingers in your direction even long after you’ve disappeared. He’s still in shock that you actually called him cute. Cute. How is this even real life?
He makes his way back inside the classroom with only one thought in mind: ‘She’s so much prettier up close.’
*
Prompto sees you a lot after that. Things might not have worked out between Noct and that friend of yours, but everything is definitely going smoothly for Prompto and his blossoming friendship with you. It’s a little odd that it was a schoolgirl crush on his best friend that led to a new companionship with you, but Prompto isn’t complaining. In fact, he thanks the Six everyday for bringing the two of you together.
Since that initial meeting, the two of you have become fast friends. Several lunch breaks have been spent in each other’s company. You’ve brought him into your small bubble of interests, (“Kingdom Hearts is the best game there is! You just have to give it a chance, Prompto!”) and have even indulged him in his photography by allowing him to snap a photo or two (or dozen) of yourself, even if you are a bit camera shy.
You’ve even hung out with Noct himself a couple of times, and to Prompto’s relief, the Crown Prince seems to like you enough as well. (“You have my blessing,” Noct tells him, to which Prompto responds, “Blessing for what?!”)
The more time spent together, the deeper his feelings for you become, and Prompto can’t really say he isn’t happy about it. It complicates things, sure, but the sentiments he feels for you are such nice feelings that he doesn’t even care anymore if his stupid crush grows more and more each day.
No matter what he does, Prompto just can’t seem to get enough of you. For all his joking about being a plebeian, Prompto feels like actual royalty whenever he’s around you. Growing up, Prompto often felt like a shadow next to the rest of his peers, but whenever he hears your charming laughter, it’s as if the entirety of Eos is within his grasp. Your bright smile rivals the sun, and in all his years behind the lens, Prompto swears he’s never seen anything quite as breathtaking as your happiness.
Prompto is completely content basking in your company at any given opportunity. Never mind the fact that he harbors the biggest crush on you. It’s one thing to have the balls to work through his nerves just to befriend you, but it’s an entirely different conquest to actually spill his guts out and make his true feelings known.
He’s not going to put you in that position. Prompto doesn’t even know if you feel that way about him; you might have your eyes on someone else, and confessing his yearning for you would just place your friendship in shambles. He may put on a brave face, but on the inside, Prompto is merely too scared of potential rejection (and, more importantly, losing you) to even consider thinking about pursuing some kind of romance with you.
It’s clear, then, that you’re a much braver soul than he is, because one day several months into your friendship, you disclose something that changes your dynamic forever.
“I have to tell you something,” you begin with yet another bite of your lip.
Having been with you for a considerable amount of time, Prompto knows by now that lip biting is a nervous tick of yours. His brows furrow at your unease. “Yeah?”
“Promise you won’t get mad?” The way you fold into yourself tugs at his heart rather painfully. Why do you sound so… scared?
“As if I could ever get mad at you,” he responds in what he hopes to be a soothing tone.
“Okay.” You take in a deep breath. “I like you.” Prompto opens his mouth to reciprocate (he likes you too, and he’s glad you seem to like his company enough to keep him around all this time), but you hold up a hand to stop him. “And before you misunderstand, I mean that I like you. As in I’ve had a crush on you since day one.”
If he’s being completely honest, Prompto has actually dreamed of the possibility that you might return his feelings. But for such a fantasy to actually be a reality? And for a confession to come out of you and not him? It’s almost unreal.
Becoming flabbergasted around you seems to be a recurring theme because Prompto is left stunned by your sudden outburst of feelings. All he could do is stare wide-eyed at you in shock. Someone as pretty as you — as gorgeous, as beautiful, as perfect as you — actually likes a good-for-nothing like himself?
“I’m dreaming again, aren’t I?” he murmurs almost incoherently, but you’re able to work past his bewildered tone to make sense of his words.
“You’re not,” you assure him. To further reinforce that this is indeed reality, you give his cheek a small squeeze. “See? You’re awake.”
“I’m… I’m awake.”
“Yeah.”
“This is… real life?”
“As real as Noct’s hatred of lettuce.”
“Okay, that’s definitely real then.” Prompto fumbles with his wristband a little anxiously before continuing. “I, uh, I like you too. Like a crush,” he adds. “I’m… Six, you’re perfect to me.”
Prompto didn’t know it then, but his declaration made all the butterflies in your tummy go wild.
“You’re… you’re perfect to me too, Prompto,” you return, your agitated expression morphing into one of joy.
“I am?” While he doesn’t take you for a liar, Prompto finds it hard to believe that you, an actual blessing from all the higher beings that be, actually find him even remotely close to perfect. In fact, Prompto has often believed that he was far from something good, let alone an embodiment of perfection. But to hear such praise from you? It’s difficult to swallow, but somehow, it feels so right because it’s coming from you.
You nod, linking your hand with his. “You are.”
The blond lets out a low whistle to ease his nerves. “So… since day one, huh?” He’s trying to come off as teasing, but really, he’s the one who’s losing his marbles on the inside.
Despite the redness of your cheeks (Prompto still can’t believe that he is the one responsible for evoking such a physical reaction from you), your response is confident and certain. “Since day one, yeah. I was actually glad that my friend asked me to help with her crush on Noct, because then it gave me an excuse to talk to you.”
His heart melts then and there. “I guess we have your friend to thank for this, huh?”
“I guess so.” You scoot a little closer to him, and Prompto is practically dying internally by now. “Prompto?”
“Y-yeah?”
“We’re okay, right?”
Prompto wraps his arm around you as a means of comfort. “We’re more than okay.”
“So you’ll kiss me now, right?”
“Yeah- wait, WHAT?!”
Your giggles worm their way into the pounding of his heart. Looking at you — deeply, thoughtfully, lovingly — Prompto can’t help but think, ‘She’s so pretty.’
Prompto thinks you can’t get any prettier than you already are at this moment in time. How can you improve on perfection, after all? It’s only after you share your first kiss — one of many in the years to come — that he realizes he’s mistaken.
You’re really pretty, and you’re so much prettier up close, but you’re definitely the prettiest when you have love in your eyes.
#prompto x reader#prompto argentum x reader#ffxv fanfiction#final fantasy xv fanfiction#ff15 fanfiction#final fantasy 15 fanfiction#prompto#prompto argentum#chocobae#ffxv fic#final fantasy xv fic#final fantasy 15 fic#ff15 fic#final fantasy xv#final fantasy 15#ffxv#ff15#ff15 prompto#animakupo writing
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Shizaya fic recs
Here are the fics I mentioned previously! These are my absolute faves in the fandom~ Some of them are really underappreciated because of the lack of pairing tag/ mention, but legit qualifies as preslash (which I actually prefer), so do give them a chance!!
Sunrise by Azurelitestar (Lengthy oneshot; Preslash; Was actually written for me and fuck its so good I CANNOT OKAY SHAKES FIST; Feels like a legit continuation from/ extension of the novels)
This is the beginning of an end; an end to the relationship these two mortal enemies once had.
To Try Again, or The Tale of a Family by Threesmallcrows (Completed; Absolutely golden Izaya character exploration, and Orihara family dynamics. Not Shizaya but if you’re an Izaya fan, please read and give it more love!!)
When Izaya left, he ripped this family open. Now, he's back- after a two year absence. And they are dying again, mother and daughters, father and son. Why can't you see what you do to us, Izaya? You shouldn't have come back.
The Mercurial Mask by Karasu Yurei (Completed; THE PLOT MAN THE PLOT; Mild hints of Shizaya preslash)
A new gang comes to town looking for something special, and is willing to turn all of Ikebukuro upside down until they find it.
Lies and Truth by ZS fan (WIP; I literally teared up trying to stifle laughter reading this at 2am ok)
What if you could tell if someone was lying? After an accident, Izaya gains the ability to see lies, which a certain monster happens to be impervious to. Bored with his humans, he decides to toy with the unpredictable man, unaware that Shizuo has secrets of his own.
Shizuo’s Bow Tie by CRQ (Complete; THE FUNNIEST DAMN THING I EVER LAID EYES ON JUST READ THE SUMMARY NO MATTER HOW HIGH YOUR EYEBROWS GO JUST READ YOU WONT REGRET IT)
Hi, I'm Shizuo's sunglasses. Shizuo's shoes need hearing aids, and his bow tie thinks it's gangsta. But who's this scrawny human with the bitchy jacket? And would somebody please give his switchblade some Xanax?
The sequel: Izaya’s Ring (WIP)
Denial by LadyCharity (Complete; More Orihara family dynamics, Shizaya only at the end. Honestly I don’t really want to spoil it, but I don’t want to put anyone through undue trauma so... rape warning. While the fic doesn’t really focus on it as a core thing, please put yourself first.)
In a twist of fate, Izaya becomes the victim of another's mind game. His sisters' lives are at stake and any choice he makes could end in someone's death. It takes only one night for his entire world to be destroyed.
Not Justice by izanayas (WIP; Quite short but rather recent, hoping it’ll get updated soon! It’s shaping up to look really good, like a legit continuation from/ extension of the novels)
What’s weird isn’t that Yahiro thinks Orihara Izaya should come back; it's that he's not the only one who does. The solution to this problem is obvious to him. But those who share the same idea don't necessarily share the same goals... and Izaya himself is as alive as ever. As destructive as ever. Brimming with potential to make everything worse.
The Gain-Loss Theory of Attraction by caffeinekitty (Lengthy oneshot; great take on the Shizaya relationship, if they do start dating)
In which we value more the things we have to work for.
It Just Happened & May the Best Man Win by ZS fan (WIP; but the plots are tantalizing man; Note - this author likes to write in a style similar to the original novels. It might be a bit hard to get into at first because the style’s unfamiliar and quirky, but I came to enjoy it. I hope you do too!)
To Hell and Back by Jillyfish (WIP officially, but I think it stopped at the right point and can be taken as completed as it is. But ofc, if there’ll be more, I won’t be complaining at all haha)
It starts with post cards. Izaya has disappeared and gone up on some obscure form of vacation. However, when Shizuo tracks him down to enact a spontaneous whim of revenge, they each have a change in plans. They ultimately end up traveling together.
What they encounter on their journey are people and places that teach them that Ikebukuro isn't the only Hell on Earth. Their experience becomes one about Humanity, whether it be lost or found.
Everything by TastewithoutTalent on AO3 (Seriously, I binge-read everything in like, 3 days its so good)
Mezhdu Dvukh Ogney (Between Two Fires) by Delphicy (WIP; Fandom classic for a reason. ‘Nuff said. Borderline crack, but there’s a hidden reason for it!)
Simon’s ill-fated decision to play match-maker forces Shizuo and Izaya to become reluctant allies. Their goal? To demonstrate what a horrible idea it is to force them into a relationship. Or: how KFC nearly sparked the apocalypse. Now with 70% more arson!
This is an English fanfic about a Japanese series that is riddled with Russian proverbs and Celtic mythology. It's like riding It's A Small World, only instead of animatronics you have violent manchildren and an entire city's unhealthy fixation with their sexual relationship.
Landscape Over Zero (WIP; Izaya and child!Psyche&Tsugaru; Supposed to build up to Shizaya, but didn’t develop that far. My own imagination made up for it though: How did Nebula develop them to look so much like Izaya and Shizuo? I also noted that they never outright stated they were androids; Izaya had assumed that himself... Plus Nebula does have a connection to Shinra, who has access to Izaya and Shizuo’s DNA...... Waggles eyebrows)
Asphyxiation (Short kinky PWP, heehee)
FILL (Short fill; I know it’s actually an untitled fill, but I think the title’s oddly appropriate HAHAHA)
The Morning After.
One Plus One Equals Fun (Short fill; Basically, DRRR the Musical. That last line hit straight home man)
It’s Just a Kiss by Shizayabayo (Oneshot; Cute AF)
“Ah, I hear you loud and clear,” Izaya pauses for a moment. “but, you know...”
Suddenly a tall, lanky man with bleach blonde hair enters the room and lazily makes his way down the stairs.
“I also have my methods.”
In which Izaya finds himself in the middle of a meeting with some very intimidating characters and a pajama clad Shizuo swoops in to unknowingly save the day.
There’re actually quite a few more fics I bookmarked, but these are my faves! Hope y’all get something outta this list!
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@chillin-with-lucifer
Let’s see... First of all its a very insightful post so I’ll try to be as gracious with my reply.
Trust, Sex and redemption
Lucifer has issues that much is clear but there are many layers on what we call trust and sex.
As an angel Lucifer was the favourite, he was so sure of his position that challenged his Father. Rebelled against him and not in order to destroy him but in order to stand his ground. In turn, God kicked him out of the only place he knew. He lost his family and the intimacy he knew from his siblings and parents turned to something dirty and soiled by his very existence. Can you imagine his confusion? Then Mother comes along and reveals him that the parent who claimed to adore him in a way wanted to destroy him. He felt betrayed again. He was supposed to be their son and expected to be punished but not tormented and cast away like a rag and yet that happened so what happens when the ones you trust most become… your tormentors?
You are vilified and you are posed as their enemy although you never saw yourself as such. The rebellion for Lucifer (in the comics) was not in order to get God’s throne. It was because he could not understand how a Father could allow injustice and lack of free will. Additionally what sparked the first rivalries was his insistence that Maze and her brother should not be killed after they murdered an angel. Thus Lucifer still believes on what his siblings no longer do. In forgiveness, in salvation. He knows that a person can redeem himself before death (1x07) and he calls that a flawed system because it is.
Lucifer kept his wings after his Fall while Amenadiel didn’t. This speaks volumes on how pure the self-proclaimed evil devil actually is. His soul is still pure and that’s what drew Chloe in the first place. His cluelessness, his childlike behaviour. All these are real in the show and show an angel who was forced to Fall, not that he actually Fell. A weird notion if you think about it. Still, he never asked for a redemption. You see redemption and salvation are two very different things.
The first is up to the individual while the second is achieved by a communication with God. Salvation is granted by God but not in Lucifer’s case. Lucifer does not trust him so he redeems himself unknowingly whilst searching for Chloe to grant him his Salvation. Now that’s interesting… He trusted her enough in season two to get this far until he learned that she was a Miracle. In short, God’s tool. An extension of his dear Father if you like. So unless he separates God and Chloe he will never trust her fully. That’s what I believe will happen in 2x18. He will learn to trust her again.
Now the sex. Sex is a form of intimacy and release. Have we ever wondered about Lucifer’s powers as an angel and the release he got from there? Also, the need to connect is strong. Lucifer always gives the vibe of wanting to be included and he found the best way to achieve that. As a good lay he is always accepted and in reality, he has let himself be used. Once… Once I heard Ashton Kutcher talking about child abuse. Before I go there, I’m not saying that his bisexuality is a form of abuse. Never! I say that him seeking sexual verification to the extent he did as well as his substance abuse could be explained with the worst way possible. That again does not make him any less bisexual or anything it just signifies how twisted his logic behind sex might be. So as I was saying I was watching a hearing about child abuse of the worst kind and what struck me and still wails me up is that toddlers believed they were engaging in a playful activity while they were sexually abused. They were so starved of intimacy and human contact of any kind that took what was happening to them as normal and even enjoyable. That was sick. So I was thinking for a dark fanfic recently that Lucifer might have had this misunderstanding if you like. His sexual orientation was fine but the way he seemed to seek it was disturbing. Womanisers sometimes according to psychology are a borderline between hedonists and psychopaths. There is a very fine line there and I believe that Lucifer might have crossed it.
Now the same route of thinking suggests that self-esteem has a major role in this, in short trust issues. Meaning that a womaniser such as Lucifer has some serious self-esteem issues. Yes, we nailed this, way to many times if you like. No matter how much he wants to show as self-assured and grounded man, in reality, he is extremely frail. Still, he is a player and he never said he wasn’t so… Perhaps that was the concept of the game. What do you do when you have everything and an eternity waiting for you? You play.
So the endgame is not Lucifer’s Redemption. He has to re-learn the rules and just because he achieves redemption it doesn’t mean he will also achieve his salvation. That’s up to Chloe.
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4, 5, 11, 13, 14, 20, 22, 25, 26, 38, 40, 44, 47, and 49 please?
Holy crap, Sara!! You’ve just made my day!
4 - name three authors that were influential to your work and tell why
LM Montgomery - because she was the first writer my brain truly connected with. I lived in Avonlea with Anne, I went to school with her, Diana was my bosom friend and kindred spirit, and Gilbert Blythe was that boy I loved to hate until I loved him too. I want to write like that, to pull the reader right in to my narrative and have them live my words.
Christopher Moore - oh my god, he is SO funny. And he’s been successful writing funny, quirky, supernaturally themed novels that just... Brilliant. He’s also lovely and interactive with his fans. I want my writing to be effortlessly funny like his is.
Charlaine Harris and Janet Evanovich (tied for third) - Okay, I love vampires. I’ve loved vampires since I was a little girl. Seriously, my imaginary friend when I was six was a vampire, and he hung around until I was about 10 or 11 before he took off. So it stands to reason that I’d love the Southern Vampire Mysteries. I HATE how she ended them, and even more to the point I hate how fucked up HBOs interpretation of the books was (except the casting for Eric. Initially wasn’t a fan, then fell madly in love. Particularly when he was Amnesia Eric). I also love how beautifully flawed Stephanie Plum is. I want my writing to engage, amuse and bring people back for more.
5 - since how long do you write?
I’ve been writing since I was a kid. When I was in grade six or seven, I took a creative writing assignment that was supposed to be 10 pages and turned it into a novel. I wrote it out long-hand, typed it, formatted it, printed it, bound it, did cover art and handed it in. It was TOTALLY fanfic thinly veiled as not-fanfic. I got 100% on it, and my teacher found a publisher to send it to and everything. Now, obviously, as I was 11 or 12 at the time, nothing came of it, other than a beautiful and kind rejection letter and an urge, ‘considering my age’ to continue writing. I came upon the book a few weeks ago, and actually just went downstairs to try to find it, and couldn’t, which gives me a sad because I was going to post to worst best parts. For those of you keeping track that means 30 years.
11 - do you listen to music when writing?
Sometimes. And sometimes when I am listening to music, a song jumps out, claims a character and forever belongs to that character. Most recently this happened with the song ‘fishing in the dark’.
13 - hardest character to write
Chekov
14 - easiest character to write
I want to say Steve Rogers, but actually, considering the alarming frequency with which he insinuates himself into fics that are CLEARLY NOT ABOUT HIM AT ALL, JFC, I’m going with Tony Stark.
20 - favourite character to write
It’s a three way tie between Jim Kirk, Leonard McCoy and Tony Stark who is totally not my problematic face fuck off
22 - favorite story you’ve ever written
Human Resources and Resource Management and allllll the little one-shots that followed.
25 - favourite line you’ve ever written
It’s not a line, it’s a scene from Vital Signs. I was trying to force a sex scene that I was clearly not in the mood to write, and instead wound up with the most HILARIOUS NOPE ever.
26 - story you’re most proud of
Cover You In Oil. I might actually be able to do some of the car repairs described in the story, I did so much fucking research. And I think it’s honestly some of my best writing.
38 - do you reread your own stories?
I do. I reread them, go back and fix grammar and spelling, use them for new inspiration, or to remind me of things that are necessary for continuity (I have a shitton of Avengers fics that all occur in a timeline I’ve created, so they actually flow as a giant series). I sometimes reread them to lose myself in the story I wrote, or to see if I actually wrote what I thought I did, or if my descriptions fell flat. Mostly I reread my shit to critique it.
40 -which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series
Oh... jeez... Maybe Human Resources/Resource Management? I really loved Annie (the OFC), and I liked how the story turned out.
44 - do you write linear or do you write future scenes if you feel like it?
Usually I’m a pretty linear writer. I’ll jump ahead if a scene is there for the taking, and chuck it in later, but sometimes that doesn’t work because I don’t storyboard.
47 - how many unfinished ideas/stories are you working on at the same time?
Too fucking many. I have Cover You In Oil to finish, as well as Floating, and I have a request list, plus I have a short list of five minute ficlet ideas. That’s just fanfic. I also have a rough outline of a story about a woman who becomes an antihero, vengeance dealing kind of ‘super’ being in the works, and a vampire fic about a vampire who falls in love with a fat girl after attacking her because her blood is so sweet (fat girl with a borderline high HgA1C) that I’ve been stalled on for a few years now.
49 - writing advice
Write. Don’t be scared to write shit. Just write. Don’t be scared to toss shit into the garbage. Just write. Write stupid things, write funny things, write sad things, write intelligent things. Just write. If you want to improve, make a writing goal. And stick to it. Mine has been 1000 words a day for the last 4 years.
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