#adhd and self-limiting beliefs

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

ADHD & self-limiting beliefs

Future ADHD

#adhd #adhd post #adhd and self-limiting beliefs #inner narrative #gaslighting #mental health #adhd problems #adhd things #adhd struggles #neurodivergence #neurodiversity #actually neurodivergent #feel free to share/reblog #Future ADHD (Facebook)

[gentlygrow]

limiting beliefs and self acceptance

i remember the spark, the moment that clicked, where i started actually accepting myself and ADHD and realizing that i was okay. i was listening to Take Control: The ADHD Podcast and they were talking about the benefits of meditation specifically for ADHD. like, how tf do you get someone like me to tolerate the experience of meditation? And then they said you can just meditate for 30 seconds or a minute. and eventually increase it. but don't worry about that part. just do 30 seconds.

wow. an invitation. to try meditating for just one minute?

holy shit

i can fathom that.

now that i've gone to therapy, i have a whole bunch of vocabulary to talk about that moment and what was happening.

i had a black and white all or nothing mentality toward meditating. i had to meditate, for 15 minutes, unguided, perfectly. sitting upright in a chair or on the floor with my legs crossed- a position ive never been comfortable in. most chairs are my enemy, my back was in chronic pain at the time. all of that together was such a high standard i'd never be able to reach it.

i had limiting beliefs that i could never meditate, and that things had to be done a certain way.

this was the entry point to me realizing that when there's something i don't believe i can do, i might be able to modify it down to something i can do. i might be able to find an entry point. i might be able to imagine myself actually doing that thing for a minute. and i'm willing to try it, and i do.

it took me forever to still try it, bc they said in the podcast that the 'best time' for it was the morning. honestly... big barrier for me. morning doesn't exist. this is a whole other blog post in itself, but morning doesnt exist, theres no room in my bare minimum rushed ass routine to fit this in too.

eventually, i somehow was able to just let myself try a one minute, guided meditation. not seated, laying down. at bedtime. tucked into my bed.

and guess what? it fucking counted.

i'm escaping perfectionism, i'm escaping my limiting beliefs. i'm doing a little. it's not the most, but i didn't used to believe that that wasn't better than nothing. all or nothing only. now i actually, in my body, believe (not just think or agree with or observe but believe, it feels very true to me) that some is better than nothing.

seven years later--ive now meditated over 100 times, even just for a minute, i get to still say it counts. and i still meditate laying the fuck down, in bed, when im going to bed, and it still fucking counts >:)

#adhd #limiting beliefs #self growth #self acceptance

[lesbian-disaster-academic]

Since there's been some discussion of this on a prior post I made, let's address

Neurodivergent Skill-Regression: What is it & Why Does it Happen?

Content Warning! This post will make brief mention of various topics, including: childhood abuse (not explicit), depression, suicidal ideation, car accidents, the COVID-19 pandemic, and throwing up.

Okay, let's begin with a quick preface. I'm writing from the Global North, in a capitalist economy, and in a country founded on (ongoing!) systems of colonialism. Therefore, that's how I'll be situating this discussion (just because it's what I know best). Neurodivergence and Capitalist Exploitation Under capitalism, productivity and extraction in the name of profit become of the utmost importance. Extraction can take place in the form of extracting physical resources (think fracking on Turtle Island), extracting labour, etc. Ultimately, neurodivergence itself is not an ill-formed or "bad" mind. It is only conceptualized and coded as such because capitalism and various other interlocking systems of oppression are actively hostile to minds that, in some way, subvert capitalist and colonial ideals. (however, this is not to negate, invalidate, or trivialize the fact that adhd/asd/ocd/bpd/etc. are disabilities. by their very nature, they impede and disrupt functioning. what is considered "functional", however, is determined by this capitalist/colonialist state and the things it values. this is all simply to say that we would be able to more easily exist and thrive within a society that doesn't reward self-destruction in the name of accumulating capital for the upper class) Of course, living in a system that is not built for you is going to be exhausting—it takes a toll on you, both physically and mentally. This can be further compounded if you are marginalized in other ways; for instance, if you're a person of colour, working class, a woman, 2SLGBTQ+, an immigrant, or a combination of these.

Masking and Burnout Many neurodivergent folx are forced into positions in which they have to mask. For the sake of clarity, "masking", in this case, involves concealing one's neurodivergent traits. For me, that might look like suppressing compulsions, consciously regulating my facial expressions, working longer and harder to accomplish tasks because I can't focus, or scripting conversations before I have them. These manifestations are often invisible to outsiders, but they take a heavy toll on us, and can often result in neurodivergent burnout. This is where the skill-regression comes in. An Example... Let me give you a personal example of what neurodivergent skill-regression can look like! Prior to the pandemic, I was a highly productive person. I was designated "gifted" (whatever that means) and was top of my class in every single class. I was participating in (and running) multiple clubs, working a steady job, volunteering within the community, and learning new instruments and languages. I was a skilled pianist and painter, and also very athletic. From the outside looking in, I appeared successful: I had a massive scholarship lined up at the most prestigious university in the country. I was generally well-liked. I was creative and skilled in both the humanities and STEM (mostly humanities lol), etcetera etcetera. But I was in no way okay. I was incredibly depressed and suicidal. I had multiple undiagnosed anxiety disorders and neurodivergencies. I was experiencing relentless abuse at home. I was throwing up every few days out of pure fear and stress. I was constantly sick, crying (in secret, and then later too numb to cry), overwhelmed, exhausted, and apathetic. And yet I refused to stop pushing my body and mind to their limit because I had this ingrained belief surrounding my productivity—if I slowed down, would I be worth anything? At the time, to my mind, the answer was a staunch no (even though I didn't apply this thinking to anyone but myself lol). So I repressed everything. I pushed it all to the side and kept moving forward. To put it in perspective, I got hit by a truck at one point, but I was so scared of being late to a thing and disappointing my parents that I just apologized and kept going. This kind of behaviour went on for close to a decade. And then the pandemic hit. And I was forced to stop. I was made to (by virtue of my relative privilege) take a moment to sit down, look around, and actually feel things. And it hit me like a ton of bricks: All the weight of the anger and fear and everything that I had been repressing for the sake of survival came RUSHING in. Now? You want to know what I'm like now? I am very burnt out and incredibly unproductive. I have the attention span of a gnat. Where I used to be able push through exhaustion or else tamp it down with consistently high levels of adrenaline, I now almost ALWAYS feel tired, to the point where I have to lay down. I used to be able to toss together an essay in the span of a couple hours. And, yes, while I can still put an essay together quickly, it’s not going to necessarily be good. Likewise, where I used to be able to mask my neurodivergent traits, I'm now hyperaware of how exhausting it all is, which makes it more difficult to appear neurotypical in public.

The thing is, when you have something like adhd as well as an anxiety disorder, the anxiety can pretty effectively mask the adhd. But once I started medication and more intense therapy, I got a hold on my anxiety and alllll of my coping mechanisms fell away. I no longer had that constant, vibrating fear to force me to maintain attention, and push myself to the breaking point.

It’s like not aging for 80 years and then suddenly having decades collapse into you in the span of moments. So Where Does This Leave Us? Okay, that was a loooong tangent, sorry. Returning to the original point. As the infinitely cool and talented @revenantscholar mentioned in a previous post of mine, when you exist in an unsafe environment (or one which is generally not built with you in mind), it's difficult to hold onto the skills you once had. Your body goes into survival mode and prioritizes keeping you alive. Once you have returned to a space where you can unmask and be physically/emotionally/mentally SAFE, you have the capacity to relearn some of those skills. Not all of them, necessarily, and not all at once. But these things do return—and even if they don't (listen to me, this is important), that doesn't make you stupid/bad/worthless. You are living in a world that is not built for people like you and I, and it sucks, and it's painful and scary, and we will continue to fight for a better future. In the meantime, it's important to remember that you are worthy of care, compassion, empathy, and support regardless of what you can contribute/do. You are incredibly important and I'm so glad you're here. (Thank you for listening. I'm drawing on my human rights knowledge from my degree, and also my own personal experience. However, feel free to correct me or ask any questions you might have! I'm also happy to provide resources/citations if needed. Now go drink water and rest if you need to! Ily!)

#adhd #actually adhd #actually neurodiverse #executive dysfunction #adult adhd #adhd paralysis #adhd hacks #attention deficit hyperactivity disorder #disability justice #autism #audhd #actually ocd #actually autistic #neurodivergent #neurodivergent burnout #burnout #bpd #depression #mental health #anti-capitalism #dyspraxia #dyscalculia #dyslexia #obsessive compulsive disorder #ocd #neurodivergent things #actually disabled #tw: childhood abuse #adhd skill regression #skill regression

[theelderhazelnut]

Ombra's Biography

Warning: mentions of trauma, death, mental health problems

The image on the left is made with X-girl maker and the one on the right is made in artbreeder.

General Information

Full Name: Atoosa Aryan

Name Meaning:

Atoosa - Daughter of the Cyrus the Great, bestowing very richly

Aryan - Relating to or denoting peoples speaking Indo-European (or specifically Indo-Iranian) languages

Nicknames/Alias:

Ombra - widely used by Metalrealmers and her allies

Boss - given by her comrades

My soul - given by Quan Chi

Age: 33

Date of Birth: November 26th

Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius

MBTI: INTP/INTJ

Sex: Female

Gender: Demigirl

Pronouns: She/They

Sexuality: Demisexual

Species: Half-human, Half-Metalrealmer

Race/Ethnicity: Iranian

Country of Origin: Iran

Current Place of Residence: Metalrealm

Physical Appearance

Skin: Normal. and smooth. Pale ivory.

Height: 5'10 / 178 cm

Weight: 149 lbs / 68 kg

Eye Color: Abnormal light gray

Hair Color: Dark brown

Hair Texture: Thick, almost curly

Body Type: Muscular, hour-glass figure

Prominent Features:

Square face shape

Iron-jaw

Thick eyebrows

Broad Shoulders

Clothing Style: Ombra’s default outfit includes a black overcoat with a black vest which is secretly bulletproof, black pants and bottom-up shirt underneath the coat, and knee-high punk boots. These items can vary in their gothic and steampunk elements. In general, she prefers her outfits to be gender neutral.

Personality

Positive Traits: Mature, intelligent, understanding, patient, confident, logical, calculating

Negative Traits/Flaws: withdrawn, stoic, bloodthirsty, vengeful, gloomy, impious, stubborn, controlling, easily annoyed, remorseless, radical

Hobbies: playing chess, reading, traveling

Likes: playing chess, solving mysteries, studying, traveling

Dislikes: 98% of the people, dancing, singing, children

Goals: destroying the Cult of The Elder Gods, solving Falkus’s mystery

Fears: losing her political position and power in Metalrealm, losing Quan Chi

Health

Physical Health: Ombra has had an eye surgery as she used to be short-sighted. A few years ago, her jaw was severely broken, so instead of fixing it she replaced it with an iron one.

Mental Health: Ombra embodies symptoms of OCD, depression and ADHD. Due to her past trauma she gradually became murderous and bloodthirsty. Almost everyone is stupid in her view, so that’s another reason, beside being an introvert, why social interactions are usually intolerable for her. Since she was contanstly under control from both her parents and the society in her past, she eventually became a controlling adult. Ombra was born and raised among religious people and in a society ruled by religious beliefs, so the traumas turned her into an impious person who thinks religious people are stupid and close-minded.

Phobias: Thalassophobia

Professional Life

Education: Ombra was close to earning her Ph.D in psychology when she left to live in Metalrealm.

Professions: The president of the Interrealm Forces in the MRD Organization

Fighting Attributes

Abilities/Powers:

Ferrokinesis - Ombra has the ability to manipulate anything of iron or has iron in it. This includes distorting the shape of those materials, and creating iron out of thin air.

Heat and electricity manipulation (very limited) - iron is a heat and electricity conductor, so if Ombra turns her limbs into iron, she can manipulate them to her advantage.

Sound manipulation (very limited) - sound can travel through iron, so Ombra can sometimes make a use of it.

Blood manipulation (very limited) - due to iron existing in blood she can manipulate it to her advantage.

Skills:

Using melee weapons

Using rifles

Martial arts and self defense

Strengths:

Close-combat

Negotiable

Weaknesses:

Ranged-combat

High electricity pressure

Extreme heat

Strong soundwaves

Magnets

Weapons:

Melee weapons she created with her power

A gunblade

Relationships

Family:

Unknown father - deceased

Unknown mother - deceased

Older sibling: Gizem - alive

Friends/Allies:

Quan Chi

Gizem

Shinnok

Kano

Erron Black

Kabal

Noob Saibot

Havik

Shao Kahn

Menace @bisexualjohnnycage

Andrius Nils @scentedcandleibex

Sienna @loverofthewindgod

Zoe @zoetheneko

Dia @darialovesstuff

Enemies:

The Elder Gods

Hanzo Hasashi

Varian Hasashi @middlechildwhoescapedthebasement

Kuai Liang

Jax Briggs

Jacqui Briggs

Nightwolf

Kotal Kahn

Love Interest:

Quan Chi - lovers

Alternate Universe:

Lady Xuna @bisexualjohnnycage

Huepazu @huepazu

Valerie “Gorgon” Watson @poisonedtruth

Leila @takiisieju-moved

Alex Demir @chadillacboseman

Backstory

Atoosa Aryan was born in Hamedan, Iran among religious people whose lives were ruled by a religion centered society. Atoosa's family was considerably functional. She was a gifted kid who gradually became a perfectionist, and also a people pleaser thanks to her controlling mother who cared a lot about what others were thinking about them. Atoosa's powers were revealed when she was a toddler. Her powers were extremely weak, yet her mom constantly warned her to conceal it.

Atoosa used to be a cheerful and quiet energetic child, but growing up in an extremely male dominant country which was also torturing its people with poverty and increasing number of crimes, turned her into a reserved and stoic adolescent with a pretty low self-confidence.

In order to escape, save herself and create an ideal life Atoosa emigrated to Germany. She had been studying psychology for a year when her parents decided to pay her and her older sibling, Gizem, a visit. But the airplane was targeted by two rockets. Atoosa swore to find and punish anyone who was behind that incident.

Meanwhile, without her knowing anything, Metalrealmers were searching the universe for a certain half-metalrealmer to kill who was exactly Atoosa Aryan. Metalrealmers believed that their gene must not become impure as they wanted to preserve their magic. Raiden was also aware of this, so he also began to search only to find out that she lives in Earthrealm, and as its protector it was easier for him to uncover her identity. Raiden saw a great potential in her, so he decided to train her while also protecting her from Metalrealmers. Atoosa found this a great opportunity for her researches. Raiden let her live in the Sky Temple rent free, and asked Sonya Blade to train her.

Atoosa knew that Raiden wanted her to become a defender, and she despised that. She didn’t want to become an obedient soldier who would risk her life for honor and humans. But she took the opportunity to train and make herself stronger.

Eventually, the Metalrealmers discovered her location, and threatened Raiden that they would put up a war with the Sky Temple, if he didn’t give her to them. After a fight, the general of the Metalrealm’s army intervened, and informed Atoosa that if she proves herself to them, they can’t resist her powers which was superior to theirs. The god who was protecting their realm was vanished centuries ago, so they could use anyone who could offer some benefits. Atoosa asked them for equal civil rights, and they hesitantly agreed. Living in another realm and earning immense wealth, she had everything. However, she told Raiden that she only accepted their offer to avert a conflict in the Sky Temple.

After around three years, Atoosa earned the position of the president of the Interrealm Forces with the help of her calculated mind in the missions and the businesses. Although she had to be rightfully dead, she was exactly what Metalrealmers could ever ask for. Most of them hated her, but still showed their respects. They gave her a nickname that almost replaced her true name: Ombra. She basically suggested it herself. She once told them in a TV program that she was like a shadow. She didn’t elaborate because there was no need to. She continued her research until she found out that a cult was behind the airplane incident; a cult well-known to the people all around the world except a few countries including hers.

She was angry. Ombra was angry, and made her final decision to burn them into ashes, so she called her business partner, Kano, to execute her plan. This big step she took will lead her to unearth a harsh truth, and unexpectedly, find love.

#mortal kombat #mk #mk oc #mortal kombat oc #ombra the ironhead #quan chi #shinnok #havik #gizem #kano #erron black #kabal #noob saibot #shao kahn #hanzo hasashi #kuai liang #jax briggs #jacqui briggs #nightwolf #kotal kahn #raiden

[fr0gc4t]

a ramble/confession, and some non-dualism tips

if u seem to already consciously know that ur god AND also think in limiting beliefs, ur not alone. i do it too. it’s way more common than u think.

sometimes we understand a concept and think it’s true, but our egos don’t think in the way that would actually comply with that concept, and that stops us from fully shifting into belief and freeing ourselves from ego. “belief” and “knowing” aren’t always the same thing.

prime example: YOU knowing that ur “desires” r already urs, and then ur ego switching the process completely and being like “so where is it?”. we all know that happens to a lot of ppl in the loa/non-dualism community. the ego is tricky bc its nature is to try and intimidate us. then we slip back into ego-based thinking. happened to me, and is still happening atm. and also i wanna remind ppl that, like healing, awakening to ur true self is often not linear. and that’s totally ok as long as u don’t give up. i was pretty much almost fully realized but then i let my ego get to me again and since then i’ve been trying to get back into that state but just haven’t succeeded at changing my thoughts/improving my self-concept (adhd is making it very difficult).

look. ik it’s kinda weird to have someone post a ramble abt FALTERING at living non-dualism. most of the time, we talk abt the opposite to remind ourselves if our power. but i think it’s important to be open and vulnerable when ur struggling, especially when other ppl could learn from ur struggle.

like i said. not getting i right the first time is OK AND NORMAL. ik ppl say “changing ur self-concept is effortless” but LET’S BE REAL FOR A SEC: that’s not true for everyone, especially neurodivergent/mentally ill ppl, and ppl with intrusive thoughts (i’m all of those, btw), bc our egos r EXTRA spicy.

awakening to ur true self as the god of ur reality is healing, and healing is HARD. in this case, since whatever we are aware of is true, it doesn’t rly have to be, but when u have inner demons, MY GOODNESS IS THIS SHIT DIFFICULT (but still sooo worth it, i promise u).

so good for u if it’s not difficult. really, i’m happy for u. i just also want to bring to light my situation, which is: hearing ppl say “changing ur self-concept is effortless!!” just made it harder to change mine.

I AM NOT TRYING TO SAY ANYONE IS SAYING THESE THINGS MALICIOUSLY. I’M LITERALLY SO HAPPY AND PROUD OF U OMG. i just think that the non-dualism community should be a little more vulnerable, bc FAILING IS NORMAL WHEN TRYING TO CHANGE UR MINDSET, ESPECIALLY FOR PPL LEARNING HOW TO MANAGE NEURODIVERGENCE, MENTALL ILLNESS, TRAUMA, INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS, DEPRESSION, ANXIETY ETC.

AND THAT IS TOTALLY OKAY!!!

i see ppl say things like “i don’t want any limiting beliefs near this page!!!” when limiting beliefs and learning to overcome them r a normal part of this process and should not be shunned, and should rather be met with compassion and understanding. AND SOME PPL DO MEET IT WITH THAT!!! but there r also many who don’t. i understand not wanting to hear ppl’s limiting beliefs in some situations, but not being open to hearing them at all just creates more stigma around being vulnerable abt faltering in this journey and needing some further encouragement or advice. positivity is only good until it becomes toxic positivity. (AGAIN, NOT POINTING FINGERS AT ANY ONE PERSON. I’M TALKING ABT ALL OF US, INCLUDING ME)

my adhd makes it so hard to stick to a new habit long enough to get used to it. and as a result, i have faltered a bit. okay, maybe a little more than a bit. AND THAT IS OKAY. THAT IS NORMAL. THAT IS SOMETHING WE NEED TO TALK ABT MORE.

maybe these stuggles r an “illusion,” but that doesn’t mean we should pretend like we don’t have them. we don’t always have to put on a happy face and go onto tumblr and vaunt to try and fight the intrusive thoughts. if u know anything abt the psychology of intrusive thoughts, FIGHTING THEM DOES NO GOOD. we should accept them and let them be there, knowing that THEY CAN’T HURT US.

even then, they might stress us out. and that’s when we might need to vent. and venting is NOT a bad thing. sometimes it’s the only way i can cool off. but instead of venting into ppl’s inboxes, we should make our own posts, like this one, in constructive language (i suggest writing the angry/anxious stuff first in ur notes, then, when ur calm, rewriting it in a constructive sense and posting it on tumblr). we need more openness to sharing our struggles. mental health struggles r sooo real (even if our human minds r illusions), and we need to make the non-dualism/loa community a safe place to talk abt those struggles and see if anyone can relate, or maybe used to relate and has adivice.

being gentle and open to this conversation is just as important as affirming that we have what we desire. bc, well, if u have the struggle i have, or something similar, u know how difficult it is. hell, i even thought abt going back to loa and trying to get into the void instead of keeping on my non-dualism path bc i thought it would be easier(???) and now i realize that that doesn’t even make sense bc both of these things require improving ur self-concept, which is what i was trying to avoid.

THAT IS LITERALLY AN EXAMPLE OF THE THING I EXPLAINED AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS POST (which was supposed to be the main topic… i rambled a lot. oops.). i knew that i had to change my self-concept no matter what, yet i thought that getting into the void wouldn’t require that. sometimes the thoughts just don’t add up. and it’s bc of the ego! i actually only became aware of that now actually.

THE EGO JUST WANTS TO CONFUSE U AND TAKE CONTROL OF U. i’m just still letting mine have power over me… but now that i’m aware of it, i can try again, this time with a different perspective.

faltering is normal. not being able to change ur thoughts the first time is normal. having this kind of weird cognitive dissonance is NORMAL. THE IMPORTANT THING IS TO NOT GIVE UP, AND SUPPORT EACH OTHER.

you failed to change ur mindset and ended up spiraling? needing a break from trying to change it? i don’t blame u, this stuff is hard. it’s okay tho! what u need to do now (or when ur ready) is: FORGIVE URSELF AND TRY AGAIN. and don’t be afraid to start the conversation of “can anyone relate to this?” or whatever helps u.

we can do this. we can change our thoughts, even with any obstacles we may face, bc we are stronger than our egos. WE’RE GOD, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!! we can do ANYTHING.

the first step is knowing that faltering is okay. next is realizing that our knowledge of who we are doesn’t always match our thoughts, and that that is the nature of our brains. the next step is forgiving ourselves and moving on.

hopefully this rant wasn’t too jumbled or confusing, i kinda just wrote it here without any planning lolz. i need to figure out a format.

and i hope some of u could relate to my struggle. be as open as u want in the replies. i will not judge. if u need to make ur own little rant, it’s fine by me.

also, sorry for being gone for a while. i don’t use tumblr very much anymore. i’m slowly falling away from all apps except pinterest, amazon and depop 😅 but dw, i won’t let myself fall too far. i luv tumblr and the non-dualism and loa community has changed my life and opened my mind in so many ways. even if i haven’t succeeded at getting all my desires quite yet, it’s okay. i will succeed. maybe not right away, but i will. and so will u. (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ

#this was a loooong post tysm for making it to the end!! #u have earned a cupcake for making it this far 🧁 #archive ໒꒱ ⋆ﾟ⊹ #non dualism #non duality #nonduality #nondualism #advaita vedanta #advaita #manifesting #manifestation #law of consciousness

[angelsinluv]

☆ 𝐌𝐘 𝐂𝐔𝐑𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐉𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐄𝐘 ☆

as of JANUARY 2023!

☆ the beginning til now

i was introduced to the law by my friend then affirmed mindlessly for my body but never really cared for the law or knew what i could do with it until i joined loatwt in july 2022!

i had my mindless affirming phase, overconsumption phase, void obsession phase… all of it lmao and i’ve come a long way with my understanding of the law!

i mostly read/watch edward art and neville.

☆ about me in relation to the law

i deal with adhd, depression, anxiety, bd, etc. and living in a toxic home. i’m unable to go out the house most of the time because of circumstances.

i’m transparent on here so this is a safe space and you can see my journey and manifest with me. everything and anything is possible, so let’s do it together ☆

☆ my beliefs

i’m a “states manifest, thoughts don’t” girly so if you don’t like that then… yk what to do.

anyway, i have no limiting beliefs. i believe you can manifest flying, shifting, a whole different face and body, revising people’s deaths, changing the date, whatever you want.

make your own rules. try to answer your own questions first. my inbox is always open for advice.

☆ my routine:

i don’t really have one. i just remind myself i already have what i want by stepping into the state most of my time.

return to the state right when i wake up

return to the state whenever i think about my desires

return to the state until i sleep

☆ things i’ve manifested so far:

an amazing self concept, confidence, glow ups, photoshoots, money, old friends texting me, losing 5 pounds and staying the same weight, postponing meetings, weather changes, followers, better sleeps, anxiety attacks and headaches away, food and drinks, other random things!

☆ current manifestation list:

dream life

just things working out in my favor

spoiler alert: i already have them all 🤭

☆ signed, angel

#☆ #law of assumption #manifestation #self concept #neville goddard #edward art #manifestyourdreams

[sunspira]

Im laying my bets now. the entire idea that autism (and adhd) is more common in men and boys is pure myth created by poor science, backwards statistics and faulty parameters of the condition itself. in another 50 years we will understand it was never a gendered condition. just a highly gendered and biased measurement system. i'm absurdly confident on that

the rates of autism in girls is "rising" exponentially. it is rising even more exponentially in girls than in boys. not because girls are becoming more autistic. but because the "science" is just getting better at measuring and accurately acknowledging autism in girls.

autism often does present differently in girls, due to how girls are raised or personality differences. the literature and criteria was based on boy sample groups. the entire research data was done on white men as if that is a standard default person and control group.

not only that, doctors and teachers and parents literally were not looking for it in girls under the false widely propagated belief it was rare in women in girls. it is a self fulfilling prophecy. that's not science.

we will soon have to reckon with the lost generations of autistic girls and women and children assigned female at birth* who never got diagnosis and early intervention. we should be forcing the world to reckon with it right now. a great deal of autistic millennial women are brilliant minds who dropped out of STEM and the workforce due to their untreated and misidentified disability overtaking their life. the impact of never Knowing you or your child is autistic or adhd is difficult to comprehend for autistic and adhd people who did get diagnosed as children. even when the awareness and interventions were unhelpful or harmful. the harm of not knowing means the child trying even harder to become neurotypical and a level of autistic burnout few others on the spectrum can comprehend, often taking place after the woman is a legal adult, and there are no legal protections in place for this disabled person.

the unmitigated stress of being developmentally delayed and never knowing it, simply hating and blaming yourself and fighting day in and out past your limits to become neurotypical, limits your don't know you should have because you have never been so much as briefed on what adhd or autism can feel like. you don't know the distres and tiredness you're feeling is "dysregulation". this is why we see women in nervous breakdowns. psychiatric wards. treatment resistant depression. electric shock therapy. hard drug addiction. cutting. homelessness. personality disorders. dissociation. psychosis. early death by accident or suicide. (obviously people who are not autistic or adhd have these illnesses but my point is untold and disproportionate numbers of them are undiagnosed neurodivergent with unprocessed trauma. i'm telling you. more than you think).

it's why we see young people on tiktok not faking DID per say, but describing a dissociated experiences and fractured sense of self and escapist alternate personalities, a mental illness that has much less in common with traditional DID, but has much in common with struggling and under-treated autistic people. DID is a very rare condition. autism is very common. autism can create out of body experiences and self protective blurring of reality and fantasy so extreme, no person can be expected to understand it is autism if they never been advised about their own disability and the knowledge that should he available to them. it's no wonder we have people with mislabeled rare disorders like DID who are clearly very sick but instead of showing real DID signs, are sick with all the signs of severe unassisted autism they have been completely barred from understanding or coping with in any other way. for those lucky enough, we see unemployed young women with severe chronic pain in their 20s and 30s who look and feel like they're elderly and gave up their dreams when they hit 21 or 25 and their brains stopped working and their bodies shut down. now they mostly scroll tumblr and tiktok and try to remember to open the blinds. they have a roof but people scorn them for entitled laziness and worst of all derided for "self diagnosing".

again i'm asking why CFS chronic fatigue syndrome is so responsive to adderall. i'm asking why professionals are reluctant to test women for adhd if she does well in school because she is very bookish and why experts in the field are openly amused and doubtful to test a woman for autism if she has a long term boyfriend. why is ability to mask or function a disqualification. why is inability to function in women, who later turn out to be autistic or adhd, so aggressively mischaracterized as BPD, bipolar, depression, OCD, schizophrenia. why is autism and adhd clinically diagnosed and defined by distress and dysfunction and not by intrinsic traits and qualities that present while still functional for preventative care. why are all people, men and women forced to wait until their lives and minds are deteriorating and they have experienced some irreversible disasters and pain before they can be diagnosed. why must girls and boys wait until their daily life as children have become unbearable hell for them before their disability can be treated and acknowledged. and if these policies are changing now, why are doctors and psychiatrists not eagerly and urgently reaching out to find the vulnerable adults they missed during more archaic screening methods. we aren't rising in adhd diagnosis because of tiktok you assholes. adult onset adhd and autism don't exist. those people were always adhd. adult onset skill regression and increase in severity due to stress DOES happen in adulthood. modern day stresses like loss of structure during the pandemic and social media is advancing to become more attention span draining. everyone is feeling the effects but these are causing adhd and autistic people to cope less and mask less effectively so they are running into significant problems, their loved ones are noticing, they are getting referrals and suddenly forced to google their rapidly worsening mental issues for the first time and seeing they line up with a known neurological condition . this is obvious. doctors blaming it on some sort of trend are being willfully clueless

*because autism especially is screened identified diagnosed and first intervened ages 2-5, before a child has an internal concept of self or gender and above all before they can express their gender, diagnostic practices and criteria are based on how adults perceive a child via birth assignments. and the studies are overwhelmingly beholden to data only on children assigned male at birth, rarely accounting for their actual future gender either. as part of the warped science insisting that autism is as if somehow linked to the y chromosome and not a universally likely human quality, you see amab kids laser focused on as candidates and afab kids fucked over most of all. all children assigned female have the worst chances of their developmental disability being identified and acknowledged in a timely manner and disproportionately experience late diagnosis in later adolescence or adulthood. tho i wouldn't be surprised if trans womens rates of accurate diagnosis is lower than cis men. as trans girls may present autism differently and characteristic of girls autism, even while still in the closet or before she knows she is trans. regardless adults are very vigilant for signs of autism, even atypical ones, in any child they perceive as a boy. so any millennial or gen z child identified female at birth had significantly worse chance at receiving autistic support compared to peers

in particular women assigned male at birth might have a better chance at being identified for types of autism that are often labeled "high functioning", involves high masking, and often receives few services. these more invisible types of autism often need to be diagnosed before age 5 in order to qualify under the criteria at all. and so in the days where autism was believed to be 20x more common in the genetics of xy children, any chance of being considered and diagnosed would come down to almost purely birth assignment dependent. with the less outwardly visible types of autism, a person who misses this window will remain autistic all their life but once they learn a certain level of skills and masking, no matter how late they learn these, the person will no longer qualify for diagnosis, either not until they have a nervous breakdown or possibly not ever qualify. it's this type of more hidden autism we see struggling across the board as undiagnosed adults including both trans and cis women especially, tho we are seeing it disproportionately even more so in undiagnosed afabs of any gender. who are dropping out of schooling and work and succumbing to severe mental illnesses during what should be the prime of their lives. overall tho birth assignment is not everything this is an issue that disproportionately impacts cis women. trans women. trans men. non-binary people. likely doubling for those that are afab. and then tripling and quadrupling for children who are not white.

bit of an understatement in that last part there. gender likely isn't even the biggest barrier to proper diagnosis and treatment. probably race is even more so. but since gender is such a big disparity in itself across race and one i relate to and can speak on from experience ive focused on it here. a more in-depth look is needed on the neglect of adhd and autistic children of color especially black native and latino kids. but for now do keep in mind the points i'm making increase exponentially for kids who aren't white across all genders including cis boys

#this is dramatic and long but it's a dramatic situation that is completely slept on in the public eye #it's not just about me this is about people who had it so much worse. tho my insider experience obviously brought it to my attention #i'm pretty sure i'm not autistic im adhd but the reality of adhd is a lot more like autism than we are acknowledging #a topic for another day #autism in women #adhd in women #atypical autism #adhd inattentive #undiagnosed autistic #undiagnosed neurodivergent #undiagnosed autism #undiagnosed adhd

[sexboobomb]

Wait I think I figured out how to make a pinned post. Turns out it’s very simple and I was just autistically overthinking it.

UPDATE 5/3/24: yeah im gonna add a little DNI bit here because some people have been taking my posts and distorting them in ways that i dislike. DNI if you are a centrist or a non-voter by choice. "Men DNI" or anything similar will also get you blocked.

i am not interested in debating these because if you are smart enough to understand why those are harmful beliefs then you should be smart enough to do better on your own. it is not my job to teach you how to be self-aware.

by all means, please send me hatemail for this. it will make it all the easier for me to block you and get your hateful and harmful garbage off of my blog.

UPDATE 9/18/23: I will be adding many flavors of content to my reblogs instead of just liking them, some of it is bc I want to support the artists who make stuff I like, and some of it is bc I have decided that it's in no way shameful to (gasp) be attracted to stuff. Most active hornyposting and explicitly sexual content will stay on my sideblog, but if you continue following me then from this point on be aware that I will occasionally post things that may be suggestive, lewd, or downright explicit. I have also added the URL to my sideblog down below, for those interested.

Hi there >:3

You can call me V. I’m 22, autistic, adhd, and transfem! I’m a polyamorous bisexual lesbian (so far, exclusively t4t, but I’m open :3). I live in Seattle, and as long as you aren’t a creep or weirdo I’m open to making friends! I am currently in wonderful relationships with @cynthjam, @draconianfleet, @foxgirlpuddle, and @thevicioushotdog!

Trying to try new things and to be a bit more shameless, because I figure I should try to like myself as much as other people seem to. I’m still learning some of my limits, and breaking a few, so feel free to ask me all manner of things but don’t always expect an answer. I occasionally hornypost, but most of the more explicit stuff stays on my sideblog, transgirlhornyposting. Horny asks should also be directed to my sideblog if you want a serious answer. I may put the URL here eventually.

I may include more about my interests here in the future, but for right now I’ll stick to introductions. Check back later and I’ll probably have this updated!

Reblogging my stuff is not only appreciated, but actively encouraged! I enjoy very few things more than I enjoy sharing my interests with others, and reblogging helps me reach as many people as possible with that!

This one is a little bit unusual I'm sure, but for the time being I will not be interacting with any Picrew stuff such as Picrew rebog chains. I have nothing against Picrew, it just sets my dysphoria off more severely than damn near anything else. Wish it didn't but it does, so for now I have to avoid it.

I will block minors, creeps, bigots, or anyone who gives me those vibes even if not explicitly clear. Ageless blogs will be blocked, because I’m not taking any chances here.

As a rule of thumb from now on, I generally will not directly interact with folk (eg. DMs) unless I see you have liked this post to show me you’ve read it and respect my boundaries.

[alpimerealmsystem]

About Us!

To start this off, we're a RAMCOA and mixed origins system, that bothers you? Feel free to leave

Now that that's over with, hi! Nice to meet ya, welcome to the chaos. The main side who runs this blog is Manik, he's an Angel Dust fictive from Hazbin Hotel and goes by any pronouns :) He's our front anchor and host, and we rely on him for a lot of stability in the system. Another host we have is Kringe, although he's mostly in co-con, he may fuck around here sometimes tho!

Our system origins are fucking weird but we're a distorpid system + esogenic + gateway + delusionbased + HC-DID + cephaloconcious system however even though we are an HC-DID system we still just call ourselves endogenic because it's easier and fits us better. We have a duplex system (sharing a system completely, our "innerworld" is the same) with our honorary sibling @oxygenatedbots

About the system - We're a system of 800+ as of last updated, but our system is forever growing and we consider it to be eternal. We also are uncomfortable with the terms alters/headmates being used for us due to our origins and prefer the terms sides/sysmates when referring to us. Of course, you can also just use our names. Most sides originate due to spirtual beliefs but we believe trauma has also majorly influenced our system, with that being said, we are primarily endogenic and have decided we have been plural for a good while, but when we did "split" we were going through extreme trauma, so really we don't know what we split from but we do believe you dont have to split from trauma. Oh, also please don't use the word "innerworld" when referring to us! Call it Alpime or the Inneruniverse, thanks!

DM me asking for a cat pic to cheer you up, I shall deliver

SEND ME ASKS FOR STUFF YOU WANT ME TO TALK ABOUT. We'll post poetry, short stories, alterhumanity, non-humanity and system related things if ya ask!

Pronouns ~ Collectively He/They/Thrive/Grow/Way/Path//Point/World/Cosmo/Void/Planet/Star/Moon/Night/Astro/Dark/Shadow/Spirit/Glow/Glimpse/Ghost/Fade/Dreary/Corrupt/Virus/Hack/Glitch/Music/Song

Kintypes ~ Voidkin and snow leopard therian. (But I will say, our voidkin identity is heavily influenced on being a plural system)

About me ~ The body is minor so please be aware of that. Anyways I'm a proud mom to three cats, love them all equally (we know that's a lie) we can't get any diagnosises due to our own situation irl however we are self diagnosed with a lot- so here's the full list. DID, anxiety, depression, OCD, NPD, BPD, schizophrenia, autism and ADHD. BPD and OCD tend to collectively be shared across the system to a more extreme extent, but specifically OCD, and we all tend to experience both of those very similarly. We consider ourselves mentally and physically disabled, even though we can't get a diagnosis for anything due to personal reasons we know at least we are limited in a lot of areas. About the physical disability we don't know exactly what it is but we experience constant lightheadedness and sometimes blurry vision and it genuinely negatively impacts our daily life

Posting schedule ~ we post poems sometimes! Depends on motivation levels and how busy we are but that's actually why we started this blog! and then depending on other shit sometimes we'll do short stories, system posts and alterhumanity related posts. Yes this blog is chaotic, yes atm it's mainly reblogs, no we don't give a fuck.

Stuffs I write ~ I write a lot of darker topics in my poetry such as us ruining the world, mental health, etc. I do put trigger warnings on some of my posts so please keep this in mind y'all. About my short stories, I wrote partially just fiction stuff or I may start with a prompt. The other half of the stuff I write is going to be werewolf/Lycanthropy/therianthropy themed!

DNI ~ Idgaf who interacts anymore, if I don't like you I'll block you but just be aware of our identities and apply your DNI to us, if we're in it get the fuck out. We're probably that freak in your DNI anyways (totally stolen from a friend, love ya!)

Misc ~ PLEASE GIVE ME RECOMMENDATIONS!!! Feel free to *flood* my inbox with requests, I will get to them! I'd seriously love to know what y'all want for short stories and poetry! If you give me a recommendation it will be a bonus post and not one of my daily things! Spam likes are fine, welcome, and appreciated! It's always great to know what y'all enjoy. Feel free to ask as many questions as you want about my writing and also criticise me! I'm totally welcome to take y'all's advice and I'd love to improve on my work! Also feel free to send me drafts for poems, I will make them my own style and give you full credit for the ideas and how it was executed ^^

About the blog-ish: Different sides may post certain things, some will leave sign offs, others won't, but be aware of this. My blog is not a place of hate or to discriminate, I want this to be a safe space. Do not come to my blog being a bitch, or saying my beliefs are not valid, or saying other's beliefs are not valid. I will block anyone who says stuff like that. This blog is centered around writing, alterhumanity and system shit. If I fuck some info up in a post TELL ME. I do research everything but I've had some angry people dming me, please politely say I messed up info and don't scream at me. I am trying my best, but my best isn't always perfectly accurate. I primarily speak from my own experiences but when I don't I'm relying on the beautiful thing we call the Internet and opinions vary on here. I want to make my content as accurate and relatable as possible so please do tell me if I mess up. This blog also mentions mental health and trauma occasionally so typically I do put TWs. Anyways, that's all! Love ya!

I need friends, feel free to reach out (especially if a system, would love more system friends. Also only minors, bc the body is sadly

I think that's it, thanks!

Last updated ~ April 4, 2024 - Manik

#About me

[hxhhasmysoul]

Hi..... Can I ask your top 5 (or top 3) favorite characters from JJK? And why you loved them? And your top 5 favorite moments from the series (until now)? Thanks....

Characters:

Itadori Yuuji

I like to quote this post by @/lets-curse-each-other a like the starter explanation to why Yuuji is an absolute masterpiece as a character and also the best boi. This post not only shows the peak of the iceberg that is Yuuji's personality but it only hints who much attention Gege gives to his characterisation.

I also love Yuuji because he's written in quite a unique way for a protagonist of a shounen manga, ie. more like a shoujo manga protagonist, and I wrote more about that here. His character journey is absolutely stunning, at every point his teenage beliefs that he developed to deal with his loneliness and the loss he has suffered, get questioned, rhetorically and generally attacked. He constantly needs to deal with his worldview and coping mechanisms being shuttered. And he still manages to be caring, to retain so much of himself.

And lastly I like his character design, it works really well both when he's really cute and when he's taken to his limits.

Kenjaku

They are the absolute fucking worst. They are an amazing plotter, like on a reread it's absolutely stunning how well their plans are prepared, how we see them perfect said plans. I have massive, massive respect for Kenjaku as a villain. They are such a manipulative lair. During my first reread I started compiling a file with all their scenes where I wrote whether I thought that they were lying in that scene and how because my ADHD wouldn't let me sleep, I kept thinking about them.

I love their mad scientist vibes, it's so sad no one wants to listen to them explaining their evil plans, and no one wants to nerd out with them about cursed energy (I'm looking here at you Tengen and Sukuna). Though to be fair, they kill the person who'd've likely been the most into such nerdy conversations, namely Yuki.

Of course it matters to me that they're Yuuji's mum. That makes their character even more juicy and horrible. Their whole twisted connection to motherhood is chefs kiss.

Nobara and Hana

I'm putting them both here together, despite them never meeting in the manga, because for me they both embody the awkwardness of being a teenage girl just on the opposite sides of the spectrum. There is a lot of societal stigma put onto teenage girls. Starting from how they should be.

Nobara is trying to define womanhood for herself while also clearly not being versed in issues of modern feminism. it feels very fitting for a girl her age. Some of the things she likes that are appropriate for girls from the society's point of view and some that are not so much, so she lands at girlboss feminism.

I also love that her reason for joining the Tokyo school is very much not jujutsu oriented. She's not there because of the politics of the clans like some many other students, or because it was join or die.

I hope that Nobara returns, though I'd be also okay with Gege just letting me grieve her at this point.

Hana is trying to orient herself through a crush she has on a guy who saved her life long ago. A guy she doesn't really know but she has created an image of in her head, it's a purely parasocial relationship so many teen girls have. Now I think Hana will be on her journey to reorient herself, build her self image outside of Megumi.

I low key hope that Yuuji will pop Angel's soul out of Hana and set her free, Hana not Angel, that 1000yo selfish sorcerer should join her ilk in the dumpster of history where they are all hopefully headed.

Yorozu

She's a rabid Sukuna simp so like mega relatable ;) But more seriously I love her powers, how much thought she put into them. She's an amazing jujutsu nerd, another friend Kenjaku could've had if they put her in a different body, one Sukuna wouldn't want to kill.

I love her creepy wedding plans but most of all I love that she's pursuing Sukuna for status. The things she wants of him are so appropriate for a Heian woman to want. It's a really cool bit. And she has the classic het relationship energy of "I can fix him". That's why you don't indulge in heterosexuality, kids.

I wish she actually joined the villain cast and remained there longer, she had amazing energy.

Sukuna

Another jujutsu nerd, but he's like embarrassed of it or something because he pretends he's not one. He's very above that nerd shit but also that's how he is the strongest and how he wins fights. He's amazingly not self aware. It's the same with his being so detached when he's very clearly capable of having really healthy relationships with others like he has with Uraume. He just chooses not to. He does have a bit of an edgy teen vibe which is funny in a 1000yo guy. Maybe that's why he's so irked by Yuuji. ;)

I absolutely love how he fights. He puts on a feral demeanor but underneath he's full on analysis and calculation.

He also makes the second best faces in the manga second only to Yuuji.

And his original form is very scrumptious, very thirst-inducing.

#answering asks #thank you for the asks #i also like other characters a lot #like junpei #or kirara #and more but i already cheated putting nobara and hana together #jjk manga #jjk spoilers

[prefrontal-bastard]

ok, im just wondering but would my parents when i tell them why i think i may have adhd and they respond with basically "no those arent the symptoms of adhd, you arent hyper" be counted as compentancy-deprivation?

I mean, shutting down your kid's self-assessment with no further inquiry is extremely dismissive, especially if it's about something medical. I'd look into "immature parenting" if this kind of thing happens a lot, especially if your parents are also the kind that expect you to listen to their problems whenever they have them.

It's for sure invalidating, but whether or not this particular instance was an act of competency-deprivation really depends.

If I were to give competency-deprivation a formal definition, I'd say it's "a type of undue influence that uses failure to control a person's thoughts, beliefs, actions, behaviors, affect, and/or emotions."

The whole thing is characterized by an ongoing pattern of transgressions and their outcomes (constantly making you feel inept as a way to change your behavior), rather than by the presence of a single instance alone.

But if your family routinely makes you feel incompetent and stupid, then yeah you have an issue of competency-deprivation on your hands.

(And as a point of interest: This kind of thing isn't limited to neurodivergent people. I see it used against little boys to make them stop liking girl things and discourage them from being gay, for example. It's probably used in other demographics too, but it's always fucking vile.)

#answered #actually autistic #actually adhd #neurodivergent #tw child abuse #immature parents

[shiftingtomasseffect]

30 Days Shifting Challenge

this is a lazy & low effort shifting/manifesting challenge that works well for people with adhd and for people who stress too much over scripting & affirmations, etc.

here is what you do:

try and take a month to focus as much on your cr as possible, meaning: go out and have fun, meet friends, take care of yourself, do things that you enjoy, whatever you’re in the mood for. take care of your personal obligations and projects. you don’t have to stress yourself too much, because this is about being happy. what you do is focus as much on ‘maintaining’ your cr as possible while not pushing yourself too hard. so if you need to take some breaks and have some low days because you’re depressed it doesn’t matter. it’s just about taking this one month to try and be as productive as possible. don’t tell yourself ‘because i haven’t done xy i failed the challenge’. you have not. you’ll succeed the challenge automatically if you just tried. try your best (don’t push yourself too hard though) & that’s it.

try not to do any methods at all. you don’t need to do any. no need for shifting meditation. you can still meditate for self care but you don’t need to do any shifting methods! try to put the shifting efforts aside & just be super lazy about it

listen to the music you want, don’t stress over subliminals. try to not listen to subliminals or keep it to a minimum

try not to script, you won’t need to! you’re still allowed of course to do so if you’re really in the mood for, but do it for fun not because you feel obliged!

don’t make any pinterest boards for the sake of hoping to shift - do them because it’s fun to you, but don’t force yourself just in hope to shift

you can still daydream a bit about your dr or visualize a bit, but try to focus more on things that aren’t related to shifting & the law

all you do is just take this month to live your cr life to the fullest. put away the focus on shifting. no fancy methods needed.

all you need to do to shift with this challenge is to try

if you accidentally force yourself to do methods or compulsively script once or twice or thrice it doesn’t matter because you tried!!

here is what will happen:

during the 30 days, you’ll shift randomly to your dr by accident. you’re 100% safe and can only end up in realities you desire. you can always leave.

you cannot shift back by accident. you’ll be shifting, no matter what. intrusive thoughts, limiting beliefs and doubts don’t matter. if you accidentally affirm negatively, it won’t matter you get your desire no matter what!

you will shift. there is no other option.

there is no ‘i can’t shift until i cleaned my room.’

you WILL shift and it is inevitable, you’ll shift to your dr no matter what,

you’ll shift randomly & it’s going to be amazing!

after that, you’ll be a master shifter

because remember you already are a master shifter!!

you can start this challenge whenever the fuck you want and the shift will happen randomly within the 30 day span

#30 days shifting challenge #shifting challenge #manifestation challenge #loa #law of assumption #reality shifting #manifestation #law of manifestation #neville goddard

[deadboyfriendd]

𝖊𝖉𝖉𝖎𝖊 𝖒𝖚𝖓𝖘𝖔𝖓 𝖍𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖓𝖘

A/N: Literally a braindump of my headcanons that I am not qualified to give. I made this entirely too long and I will probably make a second part if anyone could bear the sight of it.

C/W: Mentions of cigarettes and maybe other substances, rough family and upbringings, mental illness, self-hatred and some mentions of issues with food

He 100% has ADHD, except he would have been diagnosed (if he was diagnosed at all) with hyperkinetic reaction of childhood or adolescence. They didn't recognize the name as ADD until 1980 and they didn't formally recognize hyperactivity as a part of the diagnosis without distinction until 1987. They more than likely wrote him off as an unruly child with familial problems. If they did treat him, it most likely would have been with Ritalin, which more than likely would have made him feel lethargic or paranoid. Wayne would have much rather have seen him be Eddie than a shell of a human for the sake of obedience. (This is based on my own limited knowledge of ADHD, being someone who is diagnosed with it. I took a couple psych classes and tried to do some thorough research before writing this information out.)

This is not to say that Eddie isn't smart. He actually is SUPER intelligent. This I think is canon because he's very articulate and DnD is a VERY hard game to memorize and play, and I would assume is harder to DM. If he had access to proper resources and access to a CBT like we do now, he would probably have been a child prodigy. Instruments, especially guitar, also take a lot of time and dedication and are super hard to play. School didn't work for him, especially in the 80s, because he was expected to just sit down and shut up and learn the way he was told- when in reality he just needed a little bit of understanding.

Because of the ADHD, he also sucks at impulse control and task initiation, which did not contribute to his success in school. He cannot, for the life of him, force himself to sit and complete an assignment because the immediate consequence is not right in front of him, and it's not providing him with instant gratification.

His jacket and rings are comfort objects, the weight of the jacket make him feel secure and the rings provide something to fidget with. (I resonate so deeply with this one because my rings and fingers are also the thing that I fidget with)

I assume Wayne would have gotten custody of him in an emergency placement situation when Eddie was old enough to remember it, my brain says like between 4th and 6th grade. Wayne basically had to teach him how to be a human being first- hone him in and then smooth out the edges.

Wayne loves Eddie relentlessly and would do anything to see him succeed. Him not graduating high school hurts Wayne and he secretly blames himself for not trying harder with him, but he could never quite find the right line between being Eddie's dad and respecting Eddie's boundary to come to that conclusion himself.

While Eddie loves to challenge authority, him and Wayne have a mutual respect for each other. This really sets in during Eddie's junior year when he can take care of himself and be more independent. He tries to follow the rules Wayne has set out for him, and tries really hard to be respectful of Wayne's space by not smoking pot when he's home, keeping his volume to a minimum when he's resting, or trying to keep the house clean.

Contrary to popular belief and what a lot of other people think he is, I honestly think that Eddie is an ENFP and not and ENTP. (This could just be me projecting). The reason I think this is because he was willing to follow everyone into the upside-down no matter how terrified he was just to prove that he wasn't going to run away again. (I could make an entirely separate essay talking about his ENFP stance)

He is secretly a people-pleaser. The reason he is so dramatic and walks across tables and yells at people across the cafeteria is because it makes everyone in Hellfire laugh. He loves getting the reaction out of the people he likes and he likes the attention from the reputation he has as the freak of Hawkins High, however, when that social high goes away and he's alone in his room, he doesn't sleep because he replays his mental script of that particular performance over and over again seeing what he could have done better and where he slipped up and he thinks he's the most annoying person on planet earth.

On the more light-hearted end, he has to have some kind of background noise or he'll go insane. TV, music, the radio, SOMETHING.

He has comfort TV shows and they're usually cartoons.

He hates being alone physically, but can't always handle having constant interactions with someone. Him and Wayne get along so well because they can be alone together.

He would really have moments where he would heal his inner childhood, without realizing it. He hangs out with younger people because it helps him live out what he should have had and missed out on. I like to think that if Will was living in Hawkins and got that Atari for Christmas in the first season, he would have let Eddie play as much as he wanted. He would have gone absolutely feral over a Nintendo system. He probably still has his gross, cracking Stretch Armstrong or a Gumby and Pokey. In a modern setting, he would LOVE RC cars or Nerf guns.

The Breakfast Club makes him have a physically angry reaction, but he still cried watching it.

He has problems with eating, either not eating all day and then being absolutely ravenous and destroying a small township with his hunger, or eating like a rat and surviving off of scraps and seeds all day.

Has a GIANT crush on Heather Locklear, mostly because she was with Tommy Lee, but also because she is pretty.

He is really interested in space. He was born around/lived his formative years through the time that we landed on the moon and made a ton of strides in space exploration. He keeps up on it and is actually pretty well-versed.

Because of this, Wayne also had taken him to see every Star Wars movie that had been out at the time.

He has a sweet tooth, literally ALWAYS getting a sweet snack or a coke or something.

Smoke breaks are how him and Wayne bond in absolute silence. He remembers the first time Wayne gave him a cigarette and lit it for him. Now he does it when he needs to think, or when he needs to not think. He sits outside in a plastic lawn chair and has a smoke.

He's actually pretty fond of the little trailer he lives in. Its comforting to him and he likes the freedom of being on the outskirts of town.

#eddie stranger things #eddie my love #eddie munson #eddie munson headcanons #stranger things s4 #stranger things #flea writes

[talks-with-the-void]

time for a new pinned post >:)

DNI and intros to my headmates under the cut!

I'm Istasha, a shapeshifting void-creature and the host of a monoconscious median system called The Exodus Fleet. I'm 21 years old (same as the body) and all of us either share that age or are adults without a defined age. My pronouns are she/it and I'm female, just not in an (entirely) human way. We're autistic and have ADHD and BPD, which is also where our nonhumanity comes from (mostly from the BPD tho). We are not at all spiritual or religious, but support any and all belief systems!

Who you might meet here:

me (lol)

Frank - he/him, hellhound

Wave - they/he, water dragon/dinosaur

Sun/Sundrop/Sunny - he/it, jester angel

Opportunity - she/her, Mars Rover

Kali - she/her, human

Kade - she/fae, forest elf

Beast - it/its, canine monster

Autumn Trees - he/him, frisian horse

Ghost - she/it, ghost dog

Ember - she/it, cyborg dragon

NME - he/it/code, AI in a synthetic wyvern body

Selkie - she/her, spirit fox

Sissix - she/xir, alien

DNI:

Ohan - he/they (they in a plural sense), alien

Kairo - they/them, anthro feline

anti-endo

supportive of inherently harmful paraphilias (not limited to "the big three"), doesn't matter if you're pro- or anti-contact ("supportive" means in this case any action that tries to normalize or encourage these paraphilias. I DO know that not all zoophiles/pedophiles/etc are abusive but the second you try to normalize your paraphilic DISORDER (yes there is a difference), I'm done with you)

demonize ANY disorder or mental illness, including all personality disorders, schizophrenia, psychosis, etc. Also "narc abuse" isn't real, you're just ableist :) self-proclaimed "Empaths" are on thin ice

try to bring shipcourse to this blog in any form

anti-alterhuman, -otherkin, -therian, etc.

kinnie/kin for fun

racist, homophobic, antisemitic, ableist, etc.

against any and all good-faith sexualities and gender identities

people who try to force spiritual explanations for any of our experiences on us

transX/transid/radqueer (this does NOT include people with BIID, transspecies folks and people who identify as transage due to being plural or certain kintypes)

p-shifters (does NOT include endels and other nonhumans who are physically-identifying due to delusions)

anti-factkin

additionally, if you piss me off in whichever way, you'll be blocked.

[safieblue]

Hello! I am someone with ADHD that is interested in spirituality - Wicca, Paganism, the works. I specify ADHD because due to it, I have extreme struggle in committing to anything, or even getting the motivation for it as much as I want to. Is there any advice to be given? Or small habits that may be easier to try and incorporate? Thank you

Hello love ❤

Firstly I want to tell you that all conditions we have and therefore its limitations are not permanent contrarily to what most western medicine affirms. Therefore this means that you can change it. By affirming and repeatedly say to yourself " I am cured of my ADHD.", "I am free from ADHD.", "I dont struggle with ADHD anymore." and all more that you can think of that emphasises the general idea of being free from diseases works. You have the power to heal ADHD! Its not impossible, much on the contrary. It is a self discovery and healing journey, in which you start to be pinpointed and gain downloads and insights on how to do it. Trust! It is like working on yourself, stopping to feed limiting beliefs - as ADHD can be one.

So, in regards to your question and while you still struggle with it. Not only people with ADHD struggle with commitment and motivation, we all do, including myself. But in specific towards ADHD, I feel that the things that you like give you a rush in dopamine and being that ADHD brains have low levels of dopamine when you start to focus you have it easier with activities of low dopamine levels. I feel like for you what could be helpful is the environment that you are in when you dedicate time to studying your craft and structure. Set up your environment in a cozy manner with low lights and fluffy stuff, it can be on a bed, desk or floor with a carpet, blankets or a puff. You can use even candles and even have like a teddy bear to hug from time to time. The colors around you are also important: light colours, white, beige, low light, warm. All that can have a soothing, cozy, low stress, nurturing effect. I feel also that structure, planning and organisation can help you, in a realistic manner. Like structure the amount of time you give to your craft - make like a school schedule, the sources (list them, save them as your favourites in your pc, choose and list your books, organise your accounts,....), organise your materials, what you use for writing. And even on energetic levels organise, structure your intention and energy. And see that all of the commitment you give to organising that can be the most used time are only going to benefit you in the long run as it is easier to follow. In the end, create your own space, your own portal, your own bubble.

For the commitment - envision your end result and you can even journal the whys of how much you want it. See the in between, the hows you are getting as external of you means to get what you want. Though dont forget, see your bodily and brain needs, respect it, dont go against what it is that is telling you - our bodies are smart.

For the motivation - associate certain things of your practice with things of high dopamine levels, may it be music, movement (even yoga actually), dance, graphics of publications, social interactions with other members of the community. Things that by repetition make your brain associate your practice with high dopamine levels.

For the small habits I think you really benefit of structure. Like use your journal or a well designed piece of paper and make your pleasant ideal routine including the practices you like. And change it (to give new meanings, new motivation to it) to whatever whenever you like.

Remember this is a journey, be gentle and patient with yourself.

I would love to hear your feedback 💕

#spiritual coach #coaching #free coaching #free tarot #free readings #free #astro observations #spiritualteacher #spiritualawakening #free spirit #spirituality #spiritualhealing #free sessions #astrology

[asteriaas-stuffs]

hey dear it is very dumb question but i don't why i think that is stopping me from my manifestation i think soo...i really want to enter into void every time I try i get very close and due to my negative thoughts i am coming back to starting..like something pulls me than my mind wander like if i don't enter tomorrow i will try....like this

And one more thing in my area a movie was released in that movie my fav actor is a hero and i want to experience movie in theatre and due to some situations i can't go so my mind start saying that after u enter void u can go.this is a example..if someone make me hurt and i am unemployed so many my friends and relatives are making me so low u studied u r not doing u r waste like this and i ma not able to take all these thing ...

I know that law is real because all these circumstances made me to find loa ...but i don't how to change my mindset.

Every blog i see everyone say that work on ur self concept and i don't know what to affirm if i affirm i have all my desires and my mind start wander is it enough u get results u r lieing and u know that .....like these thoughts arise i am not understanding what i have to doo.i saw i success story in ur blog that they affirmed i always manifest instantly and i always wake up in void state.. and i started doing that again i get a negative thought that if i don't wake up in void what i have to doo.like thiss i have adhd my mind always thinking thinking ..some times i want to die i get suicidal thoughts like why everyone are happy but why not me..please help me dear ....how i can change this i know self concept but what to affirm i have so many desires like so many .....i want everything i want to live happy ...

Because everyone is trying their best to get their happiness but you're there sitting telling how hard it is. Sorry i might sound rude again listen get up freaking stand up . If you aren't helping yourself then NO ONE WILL . You really don't need logic to manifest anything . No matter what your desires are or no matter how many you have . You freaking don't need it . And you affirm and wander . Even i do but after wandering once i will get back affirming if you can't do this then cry the hell out of eyes because NO ONE will help you . You have the loa to make your life easier and sitting there and crying about every shits . No one will freaking knock your door with your desires without affirming and persisting . Just set an alarm and at that time don't wander around and start affirming . The way your mindset is freaking bad like why everyone is happy not me . Do you know what they're going through maybe same as yours but they're working hard too in their sc . Just do 3 days challenge without freaking wandering around vlogs babe and know that you have the power to change your mindset and then only we can help you . " I have my desires" Affirm it in your head or mouth just anything . And come again with success story again rather than limiting beliefs . I'm sorry for my language and rudeness but it's the truth coming from someone with same past mentality . Hope it helped . And you can do it . Sending love .

#i am god #answered ask #manifesation #affirm and persist #limiting beliefs