Tumgik
#and find someone who is honest with themselves
who-is-page · 1 day
Text
I've seen (typically older) therians talking about how they feel that their subculture as animal-people and nonhumans is slowly disappearing. This is a point that, in all honesty, I'm inclined to agree with-- although I think I'd perhaps frame it less as "disappearing" and more as just "changing."
Because let's be honest with ourselves here: is the subculture actually vanishing, or is it just evolving into radical new dimensions as excited newbies join and find different focal points for their nonhumanity? As they express themselves in whole new dimensions and ways, as they explore a digital landscape that didn't exist ten, twenty years ago? As the older members lose touch with the newer members, and no one bridges that gap between the two?
I think I'm also extra frustrated because when I see these discussions go down, a lot of the time they're either 1) self-pitying, or 2) finger-pointing.
It's not bad or wrong to look around and realize that the community you found comfort in has changed in ways you could have never predicted and which leave you feeling off-kilter. But approaching these changes with a complete lack of curiosity, with an absolute woe-is-me sort of perspective, where you drag your feet and glare bitter daggers at everyone else, isn't the way to do anything.
And going around trying to pin blame on whoever happens to be at hand is an even worse way to approach it. "It's the furry fandom's faults!" "It's the alterhumans' faults!" "It's the humans' faults!" Who does this approach realistically help? What does this do, beyond ostracize people and make whoever is saying it feel temporarily vindicated in their solitude, in a vicious cycle where they never step out of their ivory tower and always use how alone they are as "proof" that they're right?
I think having discussions about the ways the subculture has changed is extremely worthwhile. But I think that they're at their best when enthusiasm over sharing takes a main, central point. When you see people excitedly telling others about Werecards for the first time, or when you get to introduce someone to the concept of personal websites and webrings, or when you link someone who's only just starting to learn that there's others like them to old and new groups and forums alike. These are the ways you keep those traditions alive, these are they ways you get people both informed of and really excited about them.
And like, maybe I'm just cheesy and optimistic, but building bridges is way more fun than building walls! And more than that, I also think it's fundamentally something that's significantly more helpful and productive. I'm always so hype when I see community projects taking off that involve connecting many different people, especially if they're centered on a specific group or identity, but I also think that those sorts of things are how we keep a community healthy and moving, how we avoid things getting stagnant and rotting away.
I've said it before in past essays I've published and I'll say it again: alterhuman communities survive through their internal momentum. We're still around and kicking because we're a bunch of opinionated, passionate animals and objects and entities and people and concepts and and and-- this is what we are! This is how we all, both together and individually as separate groups, continue to be around. We write. We argue. We dance. We leave tracks. And then others see all those things, months or years down the line, and they know they're not alone. They know that it's okay to join in around the campfire, and they end up leaving their own tracks, and the cycle repeats.
So I guess what I'm saying here is that I'm not just beseeching people to create, but I'm asking you to create with others. To extend that paw towards the people around you in your immediate community spaces and wider, and to realize that yeah, the digital grains of sand and time might erode and change the landscapes we're all in, but we can still have a damn good time exploring the new nooks and crannies around us and showing others our old hidey-holes and favorite spots to watch the sun set.
144 notes · View notes
Text
Cares
Tumblr media
Cares are things. Heavy things.
And there’s a question about cares baked into today’s Psalm.
What are you carrying around?
If you’re like me, the honest answer is something like “more than I want to.”
All of us have cares. Whether it’s cares from our past (and every one of us has them). Or the cares of the present. Or cares of the future.
Those are just our basic cares. The ones that are always with us. They create a basic level of weight that we carry around.
And even if we don’t notice them because they’re in the background, it still takes energy to carry them around.
Which means it should be no surprise that the hard stuff of life – relationship problems, family, health, finances, addictions – and even the cares of daily life can feel like they weigh so much more. Can hit us so much harder.
Because you and I are already weighed down with all of our background cares.
Before any of those other cares get thrown on top of what we’re already carrying.
With all of those cares weighing down on us, it’s tempting to just dump it all. Drop all your cares and run away from them.
I know someone who tries to do just that.
Every few months, when it all gets to be too much for them at work, they bail out.
They quit their job. Reinvent themselves with a new employer or in a new line of work. Then find a new job.
Sometimes it lasts a few months, sometimes they make it almost a year.
But when it all gets to be too much for them, they quit their job. Reinvent themselves with a new employer or in a new line of work. Then find a new job.
Rinse and repeat.
Each time it happens, we talk about it. And each time I hear the same things. When the dust settles, they swapped all of the things they couldn’t stand about their old job for the new job’s version of the same stuff.
Nothing ever seems to change for them.
Because dropping your cares and running away from them is an illusion.
It’s not just a job thing. The same thing holds true for every source of cares in our lives. Whether it’s relationships, family, friends, health, addiction, finances, or any other source of cares in our lives.
Your cares follow you. Because no matter where you go. Or what you change. You can’t get away from you.
And when you try to carry your cares alone, your cares will make you into your own worst problem.
Here’s what does work. Not carrying them alone. Not even trying to carry them alone.
And it starts with the most important relationship in your life. Your relationship with God.
How does that figure into our cares?
One of the most subtle forms of pride is the unwillingness to get help. Even our unwillingness to admit that we need help. No matter how badly, how obviously we need it. 
One of the hardest parts of our relationship of God is letting go of our pride. Even our perverse, self-injuring pride in handling our cares alone.
This is what’s behind the Psalmist’s advice to “Cast your cares upon the Lord, and He will support you.”
The help you and I need each day to bear the weight of our cares is ready and waiting. All for the asking.
Whatever you are carrying, know that you were never meant to carry it alone.
God is waiting to support you, to do it with you. If you’ll let Him.
Today’s Readings
19 notes · View notes
turochamp · 9 months
Text
reading some actual moron be like. they should reintroduce cat trap neuter release programs to australia. because TNR shows "Potential for disease transmission to humans, pets and wildlife is also likely reduced because fighting and roaming behaviors in sterilized cats are less frequent than in entire (i.e., non-sterilized) cats, and there are fewer kittens to shed parasites" you know what else causes fewer parasites in cats. having less fucking cats around. i'm just trying to find info on how TNR correlates with ppl dumping cats and google thinks i live in australia for some reason. anyway we have to get over ourselvs and kill animals sometimes.
3 notes · View notes
derpinette · 4 months
Text
sometimes i will get bored & go through someone's entire blog since its creation
#& if they have their blog made unsearchable therefore no archive to pick posts from i take it as a challenge#& i really read every post not just skimming i gave up archives caus i find it hard to pay attention to individual posts#plus you never see the full tags & clearly from my postings they serve as the single most important part of a post#the actual post is more of like a title or a sort of epigraph#& i am interested in the Posters themselves like i feel compelled to absorb&gather as much information about them as possible#in an effort to understand them ( as well as myself Many epiphanies & revelations came to me from this activity i recommend it )#i just did this BTW not saying who but god if you never knew of her you totally missed out on the best Poaster tumblr has ever had to offer#her mind was unlike any other & her influence on me is so noticeable even today. wishing her well today & always#also (moving on from that) i even constantly have like 40 tumblr blog tabs open at all times#some that are even i think 3 years old now#i never close them they keep me company i will not really click on yhem either To be honest but those are like my friends My chums;#on my phone as well two year old tabs from when i was still in highschool of tumblr blogs i was reading#i just have so much Love in my heart for Posters real genuine love not interpersonal just as an Observer#well kind of interpersonal when it comes to some#so if you have a tracker & you see someone from north africa spending hours or even days or months on your blog#that would be me#i actually did spend months once back when blogs opened on the side i never shut my laptop off & my tabs are always saved#had to go back & scroll a little to keep the page active to not refresh & i got as far back as 2010 i think#because their blog did not have an archive but NOTHING will stop me OK if you got a Beautiful Mind or Gift Of Curation#i will do anything in my power to enjoy it. without disturbing you ( as much as i can anyway )
10 notes · View notes
alternia-confessions · 8 months
Note
⇈-11 ((Goldblood-8.5-Ass11gned Male At Hatch11ng)) Do Not Know 11f 11 Am Really As C11sgender As 11 Thought ==> My Mo11ra11l ((8-Ol11ve)) 11s A Trans Male And 11 Don’t Know 11f 11 Should Ask Them For Gender Adv11ce Or Not ((He 11s St11ll A L11ttle Mad At Me For Tell11ng H11m He Was 11gnor11ng H11s Ol11ve H11story))-⇊
⇈-But 11 Am A Staunch Supporter Of The S11gnless And 11 Bel11eve That Focus11ng On Tr11v11al Gender Troubles Takes Away From When 11 Can Be Study11ng H11s Teach11ngs ==> So 11 W11ll 11gnore 11t For Now-⇊
⇈-𝓢11𝓰𝓷𝓵𝓮𝓼𝓼 11𝓼 𝓛𝓸𝓻𝓭-⇊
⇈-𝓐𝓬𝓬𝓮𝓹𝓽 𝓗11𝓼 𝓣𝓮𝓪𝓬𝓱11𝓷𝓰𝓼 11𝓷𝓽𝓸 𝓨𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓟𝓾𝓶𝓹𝓫11𝓼𝓬𝓾11𝓽 𝓐𝓷𝓭 𝓨𝓸𝓾 𝓦11𝓵𝓵 𝓑𝓮 𝓢𝓪𝓿𝓮𝓭-⇊
69
Question: I (Goldblood - 8.5 - Assigned male at hatchIng) do not know if I am really as cisgender as I thought. My moirail (8 - Olive) is a trans male and I don’t know if I should ask them for gender advice or not (he is still a little mad at me for telling him he was ignoring his olive history)
But I am a staunch supporter of the signless and I believe that focusing on trivial gender troubles takes away from when i can be studying his teachings. So I will ignore it for now.
Signless is lord
Accept his teachings into your pumpbiscuit and you will be saved
69
10 notes · View notes
snekdood · 1 year
Text
I give too much advice to adults who are dedicated to acting like children and not wanting to understand ppl theyve decided to hate for no reason.
#like why do i extend my arm when you're just a bully with a woke coat of paint to justify your actions lol#like plenty of the posts i reblog say- just bc you dont like something or in this case SOMEONE. doesnt mean you have to find a secret#reason theyre somehow problematic to justify your dislike of them. sometimes you can just dislike ppl for dumb petty reasons even#id rather you just be honest that thats the reason instead of being a manipulative fuck making me think theres some secret other reason im#doing what im doing and if i dont listen to you then it means i dont actually want to be progressive or whatever. bc we both know thats not#the reason you're doing this. we both know you're just doing this bc you like to be a bully and found a woke way to do so.#we both know you dont actually care about me changing bc if i do listen to you and change. there will be a new expectation that i didnt#successfuly fill. thats just how ppl like yall work#thats just how bullies who like to see themselves as progressive are#i say like to see themselves as bc i see bullying as inherently a rightwing thing. and obviously if you're not being a disingenuous fuck rn#you know i mean genuine bullying when yoy bat someone around like a cat for not living up to your expectations#not calling ppl out for their genuine obvious shitty behavior#these are two different things and ik manipulative bullies who larp as progressive ppl know that but seems they wanna convince us theyre#the same so they can keep batting people around. please get a hobby. please find a new way to entertain yourself#oh and please for the love of fuck go to therapy bc no one does that shit other than when they feel inadequate themselves.#idk if you've noticed but i like never feel the need to bully people. idk why but i think its bc i love myself and i love being weird and#eccentric and not fitting anyones specific standards. idk. its more freeing to mot give a fuck what other ppl are like#and trying to change their behavior somehow someway to be more palatable to what youd like.#and maybe bullying isnt right wing but its definitely not progressive. sorry for not having the perfect phrasing ik its horrible#im just so terrible for not phrasing things the way you want i know.#ik a lot of the stuff about narcissists and bs but the shit about communal narcissists is what ppl like this remind me of#purely in it for the aesthetic. to look progressive and cool and diverting from the norm. but shits on anyone who might threaten their role#even if theyre just imagining theyd someone how threaten their role in this. oh and of course they only give af about shit to look good#which is why when you do something that doesnt fit the Aesthetic Of Progressivism then automatically you're kicked out and not progressive.#bc ppl who are 'communal narcissists' for lack of a better term. have set the standard that its how leftist you *appear* than what you do#or what you believe.#i wish we had a better term for this bc i think this a useful observation. i jst dont wanna throw ppl w personality disorders under the bus
1 note · View note
waluijoe · 3 months
Text
third person to tell me they're deeply afraid of making me angry, not because i would be scary (which i thought, and didnt understand) or because i would yell or be terrible etc.. (cause i'm not im very patient and never yell and i don't like to be angry at people). but because i would say "the truth exactly as it is and that just feels worse". fascinating
#i find that SO fascinating#im really so.. aware of my flaws and whats wrong w me and how i act#and whats hypocritical abt me etc#i see it#and i accept it#if someone told me their honest thoughts i wouldnt be phased liek i would be hurt yea but it doesnt Scare me#cause like im obviously MY worst migraine lmao#pple can betray me and hurt me but the truth of me isnt that scary its like yeah.. sure#i know what i am#i know my curse and i know my good and i know my shitty#its fine#but pple .. are so TERRIFIED of their truth#that the feeling of me telling them exactly whats wrong w them is somehow.. scary ?? even tho im.. kind#why is it scary#theyre so afraid of being bad or shitty or not being seen as good or losing faith in themselves#exactly my theory of pple going mad at me when i look at them like “youre not perfect actually and thats ok” and theyre like SHUT up you fu#(happened before lmao my bff got so ANGRY and i was so confused)#turns out.. its probably a deep fear in all the pple who base their self identity and confidence on “being the absolute best/kindest” etc#thats so whacky#i mean its great to wanna be good but its so.. unsolid to base everything arnd being picture perfect and hating flaws idk#thats not realistic#you are a person#if someone telling you “you lie sometimes” shatters you or “youre selfish a lot” etc#how are u gonna live#but im even more fascinated that pple trust me SO much and rely on me sooo much if a part of them is also scared of me being too honest#in my anger#its kinda funny#its like my anger scares them the most but also im the one they trust the most lmao#maybe thats why tho#the closer someone is the sharper the blade ig
0 notes
swordfright · 3 months
Text
this might just be because i'm a bit older than your average mcyt fan, but it makes me kind of sad to see all these younger fans scramble to wipe their mcyt fanworks off the internet the second a content creator is revealed to have done something awful.
don't get it twisted, I'm a big believer in rescinding financial support to ccs you no longer agree with or admire by unsubscribing, deciding not to buy merch, or refusing to give them ad revenue by watching their content. if you don't feel comfortable giving someone money, don't give them your money. material support isn't what i'm talking about here - I'm talking about fanfic, fansongs, fanart. yknow, content that fans create for themselves and each other, stuff that's not for ccs.
in the past year (and especially the past week, obviously) i've seen tons of mcyt fans saying they're planning to delete their art (or that they already have deleted) because they don't want their work to be associated with content creators who behaved badly, and that they want "a fresh start." I've seen fan writers say the same thing about their fics. and like, this is fine, do what you want with your stuff, but i'll be honest...it does make me sad that so many younger fans seemingly have been made to feel such a high degree of responsibility for ccs that they're unable to enjoy fandom (a thing that is FOR US! FOR YOU!) or take any measure of pride in their past fanworks.
again, at the end of the day you should do what you want with your own shit. but what i will say is, if what you want to do with your work is delete it, at least think first about why you're considering the nuclear option. you aren't responsible for a cc's behavior, and that goes for literally anyone who's ever had a hand in making anything you like: books, movies, games, anything. you shouldn't be made to feel ashamed of having created fan content for a piece of media that a shitty person was involved in making. straight up, this kind of shame isn't something i believe should exist in fandom, because it's parasocial in the same way that positive emotions towards media/creators can be parasocial.
and also, as someone who's been involved in fandom for a long time, i can say with confidence that creators will keep disappointing you like this. there are shitty people out there. if you're searching for a piece of media with zero shitty people ever involved in the project, you will not find it. i'm not saying this to normalize shitty behavior on the part of creators, I'm saying this to emphasize that bearing the shame and guilt of every creator to this degree is not sustainable or healthy (and it's not how fandom used to operate, but that's a conversation for another day, perhaps.)
i understand why so many folks are considering deleting their fanworks, and if that's you...think about it before you do it. that's all i'm asking. you don't want to create a habit of divesting yourself of all evidence of having been passionate about art created by someone who sucks, because if you do get into that habit, then your chances of ever truly enjoying a fandom again are, unfortunately, pretty slim.
3K notes · View notes
unclewaynemunson · 8 months
Text
“I need to tell you something.”
Shitfuckno. Eddie doesn't even know why he's still surprised. This is how it always goes, after all. He should probably just give up and stop dating altogether – again.
Steve looks at him exactly as ominously as the words I need to tell you something require. Perfect Steve. Funny Steve. Sweet Steve. Sexy Steve. Steve, who Eddie had genuinely believed to be different.
Eddie sighs, barely suppressing a dark chuckle while he turns away from that perfect face. He doesn't want to look at Steve when he'll tell him the undoubtedly messed-up shit he's about to spill.
“Lemme guess, you're married?” That was what the last guy he dated told him, seven months after they got to know each other. It can't be much worse than that, can it?
Steve grabs Eddie's hand, causing him to involuntarily jerk up his head and meet his eyes.
“How did you know?”
Jesus H. Christ. Not again.
Eddie roughly pulls his hand out of Steve's grip and laughs a joyless laugh.
���Apparently I'm a good guesser.”
He stands up from the park bench the two of them had been sharing. “Well, Steve, this has been a blast. You should go back to your wife, or husband – don't tell me, I don't even wanna know – and I should um, get going. Maybe tell the next person right away what they'll be getting themselves into. Would save them a lot of wasted time, just in case cheating and going around other people's backs isn't really their thing, y'know.”
“Eddie, wait, let me explain!”
Eddie picks up his pace, but Steve, stubborn as he is, easily keeps up with him.
“I'm really not interested, man.”
“It's not – I'm not cheating on her!”
“Okay, so you have an open marriage, good for you. Still the kind of information you could've shared with me, say, three months ago, don't you think?”
“She's a lesbian.”
And that makes Eddie freeze on the spot. It takes Steve two steps before he realizes Eddie has stopped moving; he walks backwards until he's standing right in front of Eddie.
“She's my best friend,” he says, immediately using Eddie's stunned silence to his advantage. “Robin, my roommate – I told you all about her. We wanted to buy a house together and that turned out to be very complicated when you're not... Well, when you're not romantically involved. So we got married. For the, um, practical reasons. We never – we're like siblings. I love her like a sister. But she's also my wife. Platonically.”
It takes a few seconds until Steve's words sink in. Then, Eddie leaps forward and basically collapses into Steve's arms, needing to hold onto him to prevent himself from crashing to the ground.
Steve's arms are warm, strong, and as safe as ever.
“Eddie, are you okay?” Steve asks softly. His lips brush against Eddie's ear while he speaks, and worry colors his voice.
Perfect Steve. Too-good-to-be-true Steve.
“Jesus Christ, Steve,” is the only thing Eddie manages to say.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you,” Steve says. “It's just – I've gotten some, um... Less than ideal reactions, in the past, whenever I told this when I was seeing someone. So I thought it'd be better to wait until things were getting serious.” He sighs, tangling his fingers in Eddie's hair. “I didn't wanna scare you off. Are we – are you okay?”
Eddie nods. He lifts his head from where it's resting against Steve's shoulder and raises his hands to squeeze them around Steve's face.
“We're okay,” he says. “And I'm sorry I didn't want to listen to you. I–” He stops; he can't find the words right away. It's still difficult to talk about those things; to let himself be vulnerable. But Steve has been honest with him, so it's only fair to return the favor.
“I've been hurt, Steve,” he confesses. “More than once. I've had some really shitty experiences with dudes not being honest with me. I thought that that was what was happening again, and I couldn't – I couldn't go through that again. Especially not with you.”
“Jesus, Eddie, I'm so sorry.”
“It's okay,” Eddie rushes to say, pulling Steve even closer towards him. “I trust you.” And as soon as these words leave his mouth, he knows it's the truth.
“I do want to be absolutely clear about one thing, though,” Steve says.
Eddie leans back in Steve's arms to give him an expectant look.
“Robin is my wife. I'm not planning on that to change anytime soon. We've been through a lot together. She's been the most important person in my life for years. We own a house and a dog together, and I love her more than anything. I like you a lot, and I promise you I'm all-in with you, but... Robin is still my number one. And that's not gonna change overnight. I need you to be okay with that.”
Eddie swallows. He looks into Steve's eyes. All he sees is a man who is honest, who loves his friends deeply, and who refuses to make any compromises when it comes to love – whether it be the platonic or the romantic kind.
It doesn't scare Eddie off; it only makes him fonder of Steve.
He smiles, glances around to check if they're alone, and presses a quick kiss against Steve's lips.
“I think I can live with that,” he says. “As long as I'm the only one who gets to do this.” He closes his eyes and lets his lips meet Steve's again.
The sigh that Steve breathes into their tentative kiss is one filled with relief.
4K notes · View notes
tubbytarchia · 4 months
Text
Tumblr media
Etho doodles in which I let my inner dinosaur nerd take over 😔 and also have no idea how to shade
Get it cause he's old and washed up haha... ok but actual raptor Etho hybrid justification below cut
To be honest the main reason was because I really wanted a hybrid in the mix who wasn't some furry creature and a reptile or amphibian or smth instead. Etho still ended up feathered but whatever it's close enough! But for ACTUAL reasoning:
He does feel damn ancient, like an old deity of the mcyt space that no one can dislike. Dinosaurs are the same!! They're old but still thought of with great fascination and fondness, everyone loves dinosaurs...
Dinosaurs are ever so mysterious, as many advancements as we make there's still so much we don't know. Just as we know jackshit about mister Kakashi skin man. Also, there are so many incomplete skeletons out there. I didn't have a particular species in mind for Etho, because where's the mystery in that? He can be one of those 5% skeleton 95% speculation dinosaurs like this guy!! Missing jaw and all
Tumblr media
"I'm a runner, not a protector" - so, a raptor, or more specifically the Dromaeosauridae family, which literally has "running/runner" in its name
But! I'm always a fan of stuff going against its nature, especially in this case! Etho states he's not a runner yet protects his allies rather fiercely even in total silence. Eg refusing to kill Cleo in SL or to give away Tango's location during the LimL manhunt, same for Grian in SL. He was a bit flaky in 3L I think? And he only started to have genuine care for allies in LL with Bdubs? Though he is still very much a runner in many cases like during the LL Wither fight. Research also strongly suggests that most if not all raptors were solitary hunters, and the way I see Etho (through my shamefully limited watchtime of his POVs...) he feels a lot like someone who ultimately only trusts himself at the start even if he's pleasant and allying with others, and doesn't seem to think he can carry his weight in groups though he doesn't voice this a lot. That's just how Etho is, very composed, but it feels like there's an insecurity there, showcased especially in SL but again I haven't seen almost any of his POVs in full so maybe I'm talking out of my ass!! Sorry ethogirls I'm only a sidegig ethogirl myself... But yeah tldr to me he gives off the vibe of an otherwise solitary animal struggling to find 100% sure footing in a pack. In whichever ways he does go against his nature, its not usually made a show of
At the mention of a raptor, a lot of people will probably think of the glamourized Jurassic Park Velociraptors. But those awesome guys from the movies are actually the size of chickens. In general though, dinosaurs tend to be a bit.. exaggerated in media, despite how inherently fascinating they already are. And I think it fits Etho because we all know how the Lifers seem to fear and mancrush on him when he's just some dork with perfect capability to become pathetic at a moment's notice. Still, he's a clearly skilled player and still respected without question Etho's not some killer machine like some people make dinosaurs out to be. He's just a fellow creature fulfilling his role in the ecosystem 👍
dinosaurs are cool
The hook-like sickle claws on the feet... something something fishing rod
I swear I'm not turning all my Lifers into hybrids I'm not!! Still plenty normal humans in the mix I swear....... But Etho is such a radical dude, I really wanted to do something more for him. The whole Kitsune thing that I often see associated with him is really cool. I don't actually know the reasoning for it but I assume something something naruto, but also, him being this ancient mythical cryptid who people know so little about, you know? It makes SO much sense. So anyway I turned him into a dinosaur instead rawr
As a herbivore advocate I also considered stuff like the triceratops (known for how they protect themselves and their own) but nah the raptor symbolism...
2K notes · View notes
writtenfangirl · 1 month
Text
Madness
I wrote this so long ago and then abandoned it because I didn’t know if the ending was satisfactory or not. I thought it would have a greater plot as well but when I couldn’t find it, I was dissatisfied until I reread it and realized the prose was too good not to publish.
Fluff but also a little bit of angst if you squint hard enough.
In which Benedict Bridgerton finally reveals the truth.
Tumblr media
She was beautiful. Too beautiful, if Benedict was being perfectly honest with himself. Not the kind of beauty that had him picking up a paint brush and painstakingly striking an easel with lovely swirls of color but the kind of beauty that distracted him, made him brood in a dim corner of the room, watching the little twists of her mouth and the subtle way she arched a brow. Beauty to the point of distraction, like spending hours watching shooting stars dash across the night sky, not realizing as dawn approached on the horizon.
It was utterly maddening.
She was utterly maddening.
How was he meant to live, to exist and breathe, to witness such great beauty and yet have none of the capacity, the right, to keep it?
Just a glance from her, a single curve of her lips, and Benedict could feel his faith in God strengthening as easily as he could deny the Lord’s existence. Only a benevolent God could create such ecstatic beauty and yet no benevolent God could exist in this world if Benedict had to bear the cruelty of Y/N’s indifference.
Maddening.
He sighed, the sound bereft as he continued to watch her charm the eligible men of the ton. She had a veritable cabal of men gathered around her and if any other debutant had been in her position, they surely would have been overwhelmed by now.
But not Y/N.
Never Y/N.
With her head held high and her smile demure, she directed the men as easily as if she was holding court. A slight clearing of the throat and already, someone had a glass of lemonade in their hand while a flap of her hand would have the men falling over themselves in an attempt to get her a chair.
A queen holding court, indeed.
Benedict rolled his eyes at the man to her right, who practically shoved at the man on his left in order to catch Y/N’s attention. Not that it really mattered though, especially not when Y/N’s attention was focused on Benedict.
Even from across the room, the tension between them felt palpable. Exhilarating. It always had been with Y/N. Thick and smooth, the connection between them as tangible as their own beating hearts. Just a shared look between them and the world fell silent, the edges of his vision practically darkening at the edges until he saw only her.
Beautiful. Even as her face contorted with hurt for the briefest of seconds, her eyes pulling away from him and returning to the crowd of men that surrounded her.
Benedict gritted his teeth, the only sign of annoyance he let himself show.
“I see you are not quite so enamored with our diamond.”
Benedict’s head whipped to the left, finding Lady Danbury watching him with those shrewd eyes of hers. The old crone had her cane gripped tightly in her hands and Benedict fought his grimace at the phantom pain that shot up from his ankles. The dowager countess had a terrible habit of whacking gentlemen she didn’t like with that sturdy cane of hers and Benedict had felt the brunt of that pain far too many times for his liking.
Still, as a gentleman, he couldn’t very well ignore the woman. It would have been terribly rude of him to and it went against every fiber of the etiquette that had been drilled to him as a child.
He spared Y/N another glance before he spoke. “You think all those men enamored with her?”
“I think they think themselves enamored by her,” Lady Danbury said. “She is quite a beauty and accomplished too, I hear. Are you acquainted with the young lady?”
He had been, when he was young. As recently as a few months ago, Benedict had counted Y/N as one of his dearest friends but with everything that transpired between them…
“We are familiar with one another.”
Lady Danbury arched a brow, directing her attention back to Y/N. She was animatedly speaking with Anthony and Colin, the only time the entire evening where her smile didn’t seem a little bit forced. “Your brothers seem friendly with her. Why aren’t you?”
Because he was a stupid, bloody, idiot who didn’t know how to keep his damn mouth shut, that’s why.
But his pride would never let him say that, especially not in front of Lady Danbury. “We are familiar with each other.” He repeated, voice tight.
Lady Danbury’s eyes flickered. “I seem to recall your mother telling me about how you and the Lady Y/N were thick as thieves not so long ago.”
Bloody hell, the old crone was relentless. He didn’t want to talk about his and Y/N’s falling out, especially not with her.
He suddenly whirled, cocking his head to the side. “Oh, I believe I hear someone calling me.”
No one was calling him but not even his impeccable manners could make him stay.
Lady Danbury harrumphed. “I may be old, boy, but I am not deaf.”
“Definitely hear someone calling me.” Benedict even cupped a hand, placing it on the side of his mouth before he yelled a quick, “I’ll be right there!” He turned back to Lady Danbury, who was looking at him as if she knew his claims were a lie. “Lady Danbury, if you’ll excuse me.”
The dowager countess simply gave Benedict a knowing look yet let him go.
He ducked into the crowd towards… bloody hell he couldn’t find anyone he would rather talk to. His brothers were still off speaking with Y/N and he didn’t feel like speaking with his mother, who would likely hound him about his fight with Y/N. Which left the last person of their party, Eloise. A quick scan of the room revealed his sister in the other side of the room, conspiratorially whispering to her best friend, Penelope Featherington.
He zoomed towards them, turning his back on Y/N and Lady Danbury.
Eloise caught his eye as he approached and her lips pursed in displeasure. “Why do you look as if you’re expecting me to bail you out of a horrible situation.”
“Can’t I see my favorite sister with joy in my face without being suspected of ill intent?”Benedict said with a grin before bowing to Penelope, who returned the gesture with her own curtsy.
Penelope ducked her head to suppress a giggle.
Eloise rolled her eyes at him. “What do you want?”
“To ask you why you’re sulking in a corner instead of dancing despite—“ he pulled at the dance card in her wrist, every single line filled with names that were unfamiliar to him. “Did you put fake names in your dance card?”
Eloise snatched her wrist back. “Yes. I thought that with Y/N grabbing the attention of so many of the gentlemen, I would be spared the embarrassment of having to entertain any gentlemen tonight. Unfortunately, I was wrong.”
Benedict turned to Penelope. “How many approached her?”
“Six,” Penelope smirked, “and those six quickly turned right back around.”
“Well with a full dance card, I’m not at all surprised.”
Eloise rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Spare me the lecture, brother. I’m sure I’ll hear enough from mother tonight.”
“She caught you?”
“After Eloise turned down the sixth one, Lady Violet began to suspect,” Penelope explained.
Benedict grinned. “When have you known me to lecture you?”
She gave him a saccharine smile, the kind that Benedict always knew would end with her barbed words. “Aren’t you meant to be fawning over Y/N? You’d done it most of our life.”
He bristled at her words.
Penelope shot them a curious look. “You never told me you were acquainted with the lady?”
“Hadn’t I?” Eloise frowned. “Lady Y/L/N’s family and ours have been acquainted for ages. Of course, she rarely ever came to London and if it hadn’t been for her father’s recent passing she wouldn’t have had a season at all. Mama had held hope that perhaps one of my dear brothers would begin to take some responsibility and marry her.” She lowered her voice in a conspiratorial whisper that was so loud, it still reached Benedict’s ears. “Personally, I always thought Benedict would offer. He and Y/N had a special bond growing up. Even Daphne thinks so.”
Benedict had never hit a woman before but perhaps, just this once, excuses could be made for one’s sisters.
“So, well acquainted then,” Penelope said with a slight smile.
“I do recall Benedict pining after Y/N for years,” Eloise mused, uncaring as Benedict’s mood soured. “You never did tell me why it is you suddenly became estranged”
“Not that it’s any of your business.” He grumbled.
Eloise batted eyes innocently. “Irritable today, aren’t you, brother? Could it possibly be because of the cadre of men that hound every one of Y/N’s footsteps?”
“I have changed my mind. Francesca is now my favorite sister.”
“I love you too, Benedict,” she all but grinned.
He turned his attention back to Y/N, who, to his surprise, had taken her leave.
“She’s in the garden, if you wish to speak to her,” Eloise said, noting his wandering eyes and nodding towards the open veranda at the side.
“What gave you the impression that I would like to speak to her?”
Eloise simply rolled her eyes before tugging Penelope’s arm. “With Y/N taking her respite, I imagine there will be a sudden influx of gentlemen who would like to dance. Let us make ourselves scarce.” And she pulled Penelope along, the red head offering Benedict an apologetic look.
He glanced at the crowd once again before letting his feet carry him through the veranda and out towards the garden. There were still many people milling about outside that granted them protection from scandal but it was much more intimate than the loud din of the ballroom.
The night was cool, the spring air serene compared to the humidity of the ballroom.
He spied Y/N, her back turned against the door. Upon hearing his approach, she sighed. “Good sir, if you did not understand me, I wish to be al—“ she turned and her words died at her lips at the sight of him. “Oh. It’s you.”
She looked even lovelier up close. She always did. Whether dressed in a simple frock with her long hair flowing down her back or dressed ornately with jewels adorning her, she always looked lovelier up close.
“What do you want, Benedict,” Y/N said, dropping that societal mask she employed inside.
“To apologize.”
She shook her head. “There is nothing to apologize for. You asked for my hand under false pretenses, I rejected you. End of story.“
“Under false pretenses?” He echoed, his own tone turning sharp. “You think my proposal to be insincere? Is that why you rejected me?”
“I did not think it insincere, I knew it to be insincere. I heard you and the Lady Violet discussing me. I heard when you declared your intention to ask for my hand in marriage simply because she had asked you to.”
Oh.
Oh.
He remembered then, the conversation he had with his mother right before he proposed.
“Propose to her,” Violet had urged just as breakfast had been served, with only Benedict and Violet dining.
“I am not even courting her, mama,” he replied exasperatedly. It had been far too early in the morning to entertain his mother’s insistence on seeing him wed to Y/N. She’d pestered him about it in one form or another even before the Y/L/Ns had come to visit the Bridgertons and Benedict knew she would not stop until he and Y/N were formally engaged.
But Y/N had just ended her mourning period for her father. And though societal mandates dictated that it was perfectly reasonable for Benedict to ask for her hand in marriage, he knew how deeply she mourned the man, especially since his death had placed her in such a precarious position. The late patriarch of the Y/L/N family had been fond of his only child, even if she had been born a girl. And Y/N had loved him, even if his death left her and her mother saddled with financial debt despite coming from the longest line of barony in England.
“What does it matter that you are not courting?” Violet demanded. “You have known her since you were both children. You’ve been courting her all your life.”
“Mama, please leave it well enough alone.”
“What is it that you do not like about her?” She insisted. “She is beautiful and accomplished and you have known each other your whole lives. Any young man would be fortunate to be bound to her in marriage.”
“I never said anything that would imply otherwise.”
“Then why do you refuse to ask her for her hand in marriage? Doing so would spare her a season in London and limit their financial troubles.” And then she had gasped in indignation. “Or is their financial troubles the very reason why you refuse? I never raised you to be avaricious!”
Bloody hell. “I am not avaricious, mother. I do not care about her dowry or lack thereof!”
“Then what is it? Do not tell me it is because you do not love her. I have seen the way you look at her.”
Benedict had eyed his fork, had wondered if perhaps, it would be a better to shove it in his ears than listen to his mother’s hullabaloo.
Instead he took a scone, spreading a generous layer of clotted cream and jam so his hands had something to do rather than maim himself.
“And how is it I look at her, mother?” He drawled.
“The same way your father used to look at me.”
At that he had paused, scone half-raised to his mouth. He hadn’t known what to say anymore. Mentions of his own father had always been capable of silencing his mind.
Finally, he had decided on telling her the truth, that his mother may finally stop pestering him.
“Asking Y/N for her hand in marriage had always been the plan, mother,” Benedict relented. “I was simply waiting for the perfect moment.”
Violet smiled at her son kindly. “There are no such thing as perfect moments, dearest. Only moments that can be made perfect. And whether you ask her later or tomorrow or next week, that moment will be perfect by virtue of you asking.”
She was right, of course. Violet Bridgerton was so rarely incorrect especially in matters of the heart and love.
Benedict had given her a smile, and said, voice dripping in sarcasm. “Well, since you so graciously asked me to, I shall propose to the Lady Y/N, if only to make you happy.”
That must have been what Y/N heard. Not the whole story but the end, when Benedict had teased his mother.
Now he was convinced that God existed and that he must be cruel. Only the machinations of a cruel God could have lined up the timing perfectly.
Y/N’s eyes flickered as she regarded him. “I do not wish to bind you in marriage with someone you do not hold any affection for. You have fulfilled your promise to your mother and have asked for my hand. I rejected you. We no longer have any obligations with one another. Good night.” She made a move to pass him, to walk back to the ballroom to her gaggle of men but Benedict’s hand shot up, gripping her arm and keeping her to him.
His hands were gloved and even Y/N’s arms were sheathed in silk. And though he had never felt gloves to be particularly offensive, he wished to burn the ones that covered their hands. If only so he could feel her smooth skin beneath his fingers.
The heady scent of her perfume wafted through his senses. She smelled divine, like walking through a garden of roses under the cover of moonlight as the stars twinkled above his head. Utterly mouthwatering, and capable of driving even the sanest of men into insanity. The scent of distraction.
Always so distracting.
Benedict forced his mouth to speak before his brain could forget the words he needed to say. “Do you think so little of me? Capable of such cruelty especially when it comes to you.”
Y/N’s brows met, a flash of pain in her eyes and then it was gone. “It is the opposite, really. I think the world of you, Benedict. Only a gentleman would offer to marry a girl he has no obligations to simply because of her precarious position in life. You are an honorable man and any woman would be lucky to call you their husband. It is why I cannot accept your proposal, not when you do not love me. Not when there is no one on this world more deserving of love than you.”
Benedict frowned at her. “Why do you continue to insist that I do not love you?”
“Because you do not!” She pulled away from him, wrenching her hand from his grasp. Her eyes were pure anguish as she looked at him and the very sight of her pain had him staggering back. “If you truly held any affection for me, I would know. I have studied you all our lives, Benedict. And in all the time we shared together, you had never shown any affection for me beyond that of a friend. Your proposal hurt, Benedict. I have loved you in every way a man could be loved for so long and for you to ask for my hand in marriage out of pity—“ She choked, eyes widening as if she didn’t mean to say the things she’d said.
“You love me?” He echoed, heart beating quickly in his chest. He wondered, briefly, if his fast beating heart marks the day he really lived. If Y/N’s confession had been the reason he truly felt alive for the first time in his life.
Her face crumpled in pain as she stepped back. “Forgive me, I shouldn’t have said those things. Please take your leave, Benedict. That I may salvage whatever scraps of my dignity is left.”
But Benedict did no such thing.
Instead he took her hands and lowered himself into a kneel, setting his eyes upon her. The arching light of the manor spilled over the veranda casted her in a soft glow that took his very breath away.
Y/N’s eyes widened in alarm and whatever pain she held there was washed away by her surprise. “Benedict, what are you doing?”
“Begging you for forgiveness.”
“What? Benedict, get up.”
But he held firm, his determination cementing his knees to the ground. “Forgive me, Y/N, for my grave transgressions against you. That you had ever lived your life doubting my affections for you, or wondering if I cared for you as more than a friend are sins I will carry with me to my last breath. It will be my great shame that I had not made it abundantly clear that I love you. Because I do love you. Most ardently.”
“Benedict, get up. This is madness—“
“You are right. It is madness. The way I feel for you would drive the sanest of people into lunacy. But if loving you is madness then I don’t ever wish to be sane.”
Her eyes gleamed silver with unshed tears that threatened to fall from her pretty eyes. “B-But that morning, the day you proposed—“
“I did not propose to you out of pity for you, I did it out of pity for me. I needed to put myself out of my misery and finally marry the only girl I ever had the privilege of falling in love with rather than continue pining after you in secret.”
She let out a a laugh through her tears, the sound like bells chiming during a storm. Light and beautiful despite the pouring rain that threatened to drown it out. “Ask me again.”
His heart leapt to his throat, pounding so quickly he struggled to get the words out. But they came nonetheless, the words clear and betraying none of his anxiety. “Y/N, will you marry me?”
“Yes.”
1K notes · View notes
ezukll · 3 months
Text
✮⋆ 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦 𝗢𝗕𝗦𝗘𝗥𝗩𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗢𝗡𝗦 🦋
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ♈︎ 𝗔𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗦 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Aries Venus is a very passionate placement, as Aries is the sign of passion and action, while Venus is associated with love, beauty, and relationship. Someone with this placement likely has a very fiery and intense approach to romance and relationships. They are likely to be very passionate and enthusiastic about their partner, and they may have a strong desire to make their relationship exciting and fresh. They may also be very willing to take the lead and to be the one to initiate and take action.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be spontaneous and adventurous.
⋆ Make an effort to keep the relationship interesting.
⋆ Take the lead and initiate adventures.
๋⋆ Show off your passionate side.
⋆ Express your desires and emotions clearly.
⋆ Be willing to take risks for love.
⋆ Show off your confidence and self-esteem.
⋆ Be willing to take the first step in a relationship.
⠀⠀⠀⠀♉︎ 𝗧𝗔𝗨𝗥𝗨𝗦 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Venus in Taurus is known for its strong sense of security, stability, and comfort. People with their Venus in Taurus typically enjoy taking time to appreciate the finer things in life and may find joy in material possessions and pleasures. They are often described as "old-fashioned" in their approach to relationships and values. They may seek commitment and stability in their romantic relationships and prefer a more traditional set of values when it comes to romance.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Show your interest and affection through small actions and words.
⋆ Give the Taurus Venus attention and allow them to feel heard by asking open-ended questions and focusing on them.
⋆ Be patient, consistent, and respectful in your actions towards them.
⋆ Make time for them and demonstrate that you are willing to put in effort.
⋆ Be honest and communicate your feelings and thoughts clearly and respectfully.
⠀⠀⠀⠀♊︎ 𝗚𝗘𝗠𝗜𝗡𝗜 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Gemini Venus is known for being a playful, lighthearted, and mischievous placement that adds a spark of fun and excitement to a person's romantic relationships. People with this placement seek out romantic interests who can match their energy and keep up with their witty banter. They may have a tendency to get bored in relationships and love to flirt, so someone who can keep them engaged and entertained is key to winning their affection. However, despite their flirtatious nature, they still enjoy a strong connection and are seeking a partner who they can have deep conversations with as well.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be yourself and show your unique personality.
⋆ Make them laugh and keep the conversation light and fun.
⋆ Be spontaneous and try new things together.
⋆ Give them space to express themself and let them know they can trust you.
⋆ Don't take their flirtatious nature too seriously... they may just be having fun.
If you are able to capture their attention with your unique personality and keep them engaged, you may have a chance with someone with a Gemini Venus.
⠀⠀⠀⠀♋︎ 𝗖𝗔𝗡𝗖𝗘𝗥 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Cancer Venus is known for being emotionally expressive, caring, and sensitive in relationships. People with their Venus in Cancer can be very nurturing and tend to wear their heart on their sleeve. They may crave affection and emotional security, so someone who is understanding and supportive can go a long way in gaining their affection. On the other hand, people with this placement may also struggle with being possessive and overly sensitive towards their partner's actions or words. Ultimately, communication and empathy is key in forming a strong connection with someone who has their Venus in Cancer.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Show compassion and empathy towards their feelings.
⋆ Be understanding and emotionally supportive.
⋆ Create an environment where they can express themselves freely and feel safe.
⋆ Be nurturing and give the comfort they seek.
⋆ Build a strong connection with them through open communication.
⋆ Make them feel loved and appreciated.
⋆ Be genuine and honest with them.
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ♌︎ 𝗟𝗘𝗢 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Leo Venus is described as a passionate, creative, confident, and dramatic placement. People with a Venus in Leo seek out romantic partners who are self-assured and can bring out their artistic side. They may crave a strong physical connection and are often drawn to confident, charismatic partners who can keep up with their fiery personality. They also appreciate the finer things in life and may enjoy luxury or extravagant gestures. However, their passionate nature can also lead to being possessive or jealous in relationships, so communication and trust is key.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Display your confidence and take the lead.
⋆ Show your artistic side through creative dates or gestures.
⋆ Be fun and daring, and don't be afraid to take risks in your romantic interactions.
⋆ Be honest and complimentary, and make sure they feel admired and appreciated.
⋆ Be willing to receive their lavish gestures of affection and don't be afraid to show off a little.
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ♍︎ 𝗩𝗜𝗥𝗚𝗢 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
A Virgo Venus is described as analytical, detail-oriented, and practical in relationships. They may be a bit reserved and prefer to take things slowly and be mindful in their romantic interactions. They tend to value efficiency and may be more objective, logical, and nitpicky when it comes to relationships. However, they also appreciate order and structure and desire a partner who can provide that. They may be more selective and picky when it comes to romantic partners, but once they find the right person, they can be loyal, devoted, and caring.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Make them feel heard and understood, and be mindful of the details.
⋆ Be honest and logical in your interaction and don't be afraid to communicate directly.
⋆ Be organized and methodical in how you approach the relationship.
⋆ Don't be afraid to ask follow-up questions and show curiosity and interest in them.
⋆ Demonstrate that you can provide stability, order, and structure in a relationship.
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ♎︎ 𝗟𝗜𝗕𝗥𝗔 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Libra Venus is characterized by diplomacy, balance, harmony, and fairness. Those with this placement tend to seek out relationships that are equal in nature, with both sides contributing and working together. They may have an idealistic view of relationships, tending to believe in true love and romance. They may seek a partner who is well-rounded, attractive, and charming, and who can engage in deep conversations and understand the value of compromise. They tend to enjoy relationships where everyone can get along and have a peaceful connection.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be diplomatic and show your ability to keep it balanced and fair.
⋆ Be charming, courteous, and considerate towards them.
⋆ Don't be too aggressive or overpowering in your approaches towards them, as this can be a turn-off.
⋆ Show that you are willing to compromise and see things from their point of view.
⋆ Demonstrate emotional maturity and be willing to express your feelings in a respectful manner.
⠀⠀⠀⠀♏︎ 𝗦𝗖𝗢𝗥𝗣𝗜𝗢 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
A Scorpio Venus is characterized by a deep and intense approach to relationships. People with this placement may have emotional walls up, making it challenging for them to open up and be vulnerable. They may have a darker side or be attracted to the hidden depths on others. They may have a strong intuitive nature, seek out deep and meaningful connections, and crave intimacy and trust. They may have high standards and expectations when it comes to relationships and expect their partners to match their intensity and be willing to explore deep levels of trust.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be honest and genuine in your interactions and show them that you can go deep.
⋆ Be open to exploring darker sides and don't shy away from more taboo subjects.
⋆ Show that you can be trustworthy and keep their secrets.
⋆ Demonstrate your passion and commitment and be willing to put in effort.
⋆ Let them know that their emotions are safe with you and make them feel seen and understood.
⠀⠀⠀♐︎ 𝗦𝗔𝗚𝗜𝗧𝗧𝗔𝗥𝗜𝗨𝗦 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
A Sagittarius Venus is known for having a free-spirited, adventurous, and flexible approach to relationships. People with this placement may have a tendency to avoid commitment and prefer to explore and try new things. They may crave freedom and independence and may have a hard time settling down. However, they can also bring a zest and excitement to relationships and thrive in exciting and stimulating environments. They may prefer casual relationships with a lack of limitations but can still have serious long-standing relationships if their needs are met.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be spontaneous and willing to try new things.
⋆ Show your adventurous and playful side, and be open to exploring and new experiences.
⋆ Don't be too clingy or controlling, as they prefer their freedom and can be more independent.
⋆ Be honest and upfront in your communication and don't be afraid to be straightforward.
⋆ Demonstrate your sense of humor and have a fun-loving attitude that matches their spirit.
⠀⠀⠀♑︎ 𝗖𝗔𝗣𝗥𝗜𝗖𝗢𝗥𝗡 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Capricorn Venus is described as a responsible, practical, and loyal placement, seeking commitment and stability in relationships. People with this placement may be more reserved and may have high standards when it comes to selecting a partner. They may take things slowly and prefer to establish a solid foundation before committing to someone. They may require time to open up and express their emotions, but once they trust someone, they can be loyal and devoted partners who prioritize their relationship.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be reliable, responsible, and trustworthy.
⋆ Demonstrate your ability to be practical and realistic in your interactions.
⋆ Respect their need for space and alone time.
⋆ Be open to committing and showing loyalty.
⋆ Show that you can take the relationship seriously and want something long-lasting and stable.
⠀⠀⠀⠀♒︎ 𝗔𝗤𝗨𝗔𝗥𝗜𝗨𝗦 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Aquarius Venus is characterized by a unique and innovative approach to relationships. They may prefer unconventional partners and seek out connections that are dynamic and stimulating. They may not fit into traditional relationship structures or dynamics and may be attracted to more progressive thinking and ideas. They may prefer to explore deeper connections and be attracted to someone who can match their independent and unique vibe. Ultimately, they will thrive with someone who is open-minded and can embrace their unorthodox nature.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be open-minded and non-judgmental in your interactions.
⋆ Respect their need for independence and autonomy.
⋆ Allow them to express themself freely and don't try to control or limit them in any way.
⋆ Show your ability to keep up with their innovative and unorthodox nature.
⋆ Be willing to explore their unconventional thinking and ideas.
⠀⠀⠀⠀ ♓︎ 𝗣𝗜𝗦𝗖𝗘𝗦 𝗩𝗘𝗡𝗨𝗦
Pisces Venus is characterized by a sensitive and compassionate approach to relationships. People with this placement may have a tendency to romanticize their relationships and can be very forgiving and accepting of their partners' flaws. They may have a strong connection to their spirituality and have a heightened intuition about others. They may be empathic and perceptive, easily sensing someone's emotions. They may tend to get lost in their feelings and desire deep connections, but they may also get overwhelmed by their emotions or their partners' feelings.
⠀⠀⠀🦋 𝗛𝗢𝗪 𝗧𝗢 𝗔𝗧𝗧𝗥𝗔𝗖𝗧
⋆ Be compassionate and empathetic in your interactions.
⋆ Recognize their sensitivity and allow them to express their feelings freely without judgment.
⋆ Show that you can be reliable and trustworthy, and respect their need for depth and a sense of spiritual connection.
⋆ Be patient, understanding, and open-minded when it comes to their emotions.
⋆ Be a good listener and let them know that you understand and accept them for who they are.
1K notes · View notes
snekdood · 1 year
Text
No one accepted you and loved you unconditionally and instead of doing it for yourself you take it out on anyone who has figured out how to do it for themselves.
#mood#ig im just builp dipperent#like. no one accepted me for shit either. everyone around me had somethin judgemental to say about me.#but i knew it was important to be myself and i knew how much fun i had being myself and that was the most important thing to me.#i always had more fun being myself even when i was alone than submitting and trying to be someone else to make others happy#idk. ig this is the two sides of where ones life ends up of they actually try to do something about loving themselves instead of tkaing it#out on everyone around you. its not like i dont understand its just not an excuse and it still wasnt okay and you've hurt MANY people.#all bc your heart is so bitter and you cant even being yourself to even imagine loving yourself genuinely. you rely so heavily on everyone#outsid eof you to validate that you're good and lovable but even the people around you have shit to talk to#thats an unstable way to feel like who you are is inherently lovable. you and i both know that and you and i both know why#ig lets keep praying they dont find out.#idk why i do this or try to help you sort through your trauma. i guess i feel so guilty that you have no one to work on this with bc you#probably cant afford a therapist or dont care enough abt yourself to get one.#its not my job to help you introspect but ig for the sake of you learning how important it is to be honest with others but more importantly#yourself i feel some type of obligation.#but i cant keep doing this. i cant keep trying to understand you and your thought process.i cant keep sitting here letting you bully me in#public but we both know you're looking at this sorta shit in private.#i dont deserve to be abused like this and its not my job to make you feel better or figure yourself out or help you work on your trauma#or help you recognize where the bs behavior you have comes from and help you try to work on it to become better#bc truth is. idk if you actually care about being better or you just like to know that i still care about you on some level in spite of#everything youve done. ig im hopeful you can be brought out of your shitty resentful bitter vengeful state against humanity that leads you#to hurt people with no mercy all for your own gain. ig im hopeful you can change but quite honestly its not my job to help you with it#esp with the way you treat me publicly anyways.#part of me really hopes you're not just one of those edgy disecfected people from 4chan or whatever who just doesnt care about hurting ppl#and justifies it bc you think someones cringe. im sure thats what you try to tell everyone im like but im finding more and mkre that#iterally everything you accuse me of is projection. even aside from the sa. just so ppl dont look into your history and focus on attacking#me instead.#hell. i wouldnt be surprised to find out you're a kiwifarmer weaponziing ppl on heres intention to help and be moral and weaponizing#the fact that ppl used to think callouts were the way to do that. literally wouldnt surprise me an inch.
0 notes
scientia-rex · 5 months
Text
Sometimes people tell me I'm a good person. I'm not a good person by nature, or by default. I'm a good person because I've decided that it's important to me to act like one, on a daily basis, forever.
My actual nature is that I want power. I want power and I want my life to be easy and I want other people to be forced to be nice to me even if they hate me. I want other people to have to suck up to me, I want to watch people who I know hate me suffer through the indignity of having to suck up to me. I want to hurt people who hurt me. I want all of these things in the same exact deeply recognizable way that a gorilla or a chimpanzee does. I watch those documentaries and I recognize myself, intimately. The fact that I can behave like a good person in spite of that has taken me a long time and a lot of effort to achieve.
What you feel isn't as important for your "goodness" as what you do. And you get good at what you practice. So practice your skills at being polite, pleasant, kind. Practice gently interrupting negative behaviors--whether that's someone's negative behaviors directed towards themselves, or directed towards someone else. The idea that we have to be inherently without sin is such Christian garbage. It's psychological gibberish. We want things! We want everything! That is normal and human and the key is not acting on every bad feeling you have.
I have taken my insatiable desire for power and to manipulate people and I have used it for good. I have learned how to manipulate people into coming to the doctor and taking their blood pressure medication and being honest about their recreational substance use. I have taken my psychology education and I have used it to craft a persona that makes people feel at ease. I go home at the end of the day exhausted, because maintaining a persona for ten hours straight is exhausting, but I do it happy, because I manipulated the people I work with into feeling better and having brighter days. I manipulated my patients into feeling good about their achievements and recognizing where we need to do things differently.
The hard part is that when the mask slips, people find it not just off-putting but deeply upsetting. When I explain things like "I have thought very carefully about how I would conduct a career in domestic terrorism because I would genuinely like to bomb the headquarters of most American insurance companies, but I don't see a way to do it without getting caught and either killed or spending the rest of my life in prison, and at the moment I consider that an unacceptable outcome," people go from "ha ha! my wacky colleague" to "Jesus Christ, I didn't realize there was something actually wrong with you."
Anyway, don't make your kids read the extended works on Machiavelli at twelve, my dad thought he was helping me but all he accomplished was making me sad I'll never be a king.
2K notes · View notes
vivmaek · 7 months
Text
LOVE & SEX: ASTRO OBSERVATIONS (18+)
Tumblr media
Happy Scorpio season everyone!
Sagittarius Risings are the best at flirting. I may be biased considering that I’m a Gemini Rising, but I stand by my opinion. They know how to evade small talk and make people melt through their warmth and charm. Sagittarius Risings can be cocky, but this serves them well when trying to gain romantic attention. Confidence is sexy. They keep things light hearted and fun. Their commitment issues add a layer of excitement to their relationships, they’re often pursued by multiple people at once. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
A Cancer Venus or Mars could spend the entire day in bed with their partner. They blend cuddles, foreplay, and sex into long sessions that seemingly have no end.
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Those who have their Sun in the third house can carry out a long-distance relationship successfully. A strong sense of imagination keeps the relationship alive within their head. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
People who have Mars in the sixth house need to find a partner who is spontaneous. Their sex life might start to feel like a routine and they’ll become bored. Sex is important to these individuals, it has to remain exciting if these types are going to settle down. 
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Someone with Mars opposite to their Ascendant might find that they give more than they receive within their sexual relationships. They might participate in sexual activities just to appease their partner. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
A Scorpio Mars might have secret sex fantasies that make them feel ashamed. They also probe into the sex life of their partners through pointed questions. This does not come from a place of curiosity, if they start doing this it's because they feel possessive and jealous. They want to be the best their partner has ever had. 
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Individuals with Mars in the first house have the best stamina, hands down. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
An Aquarius Venus is always getting caught up within the most complicated romantic endeavors. They’re the first to claim that they’re easy-going and just want to fall in love with their best friend. When in reality, they’re avoidant and uncomfortable with conventional romantic affection. They’re delusional for thinking this isn’t going to cause issues. 
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
People with a Pisces Venus will toy around with multiple people at once and then they’ll have the audacity to become confused when one of their partners finds out and is upset. Their love and affection for others is innocent. They’re just following their heart, and if it leads them into the arms of multiple people, so be it. Unlike other water venus placements, a Pisces Venus is not possessive over their lovers, they’re just here for the vibe. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
Capricorn Ascendants are incredibly classy. Dating them feels like a high-end experience. They know how to treat their partners right. They show up on time and are always appropriately dressed for the occasion. 
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
People who have a Libra Sun placed within the tenth house find it difficult to balance their love life and career. It seems that these two areas of life are always in conflict with one another. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
Individuals who have their Sun placed within the first house are honest and straightforward, they don’t play around with people and they do everything they can to avoid hurt feelings. 
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
Taurus Moons like to eat before sex. If they didn’t get a chance to do this, they’ll get up and make themselves a sandwich immediately afterwards. They’ll make one for their partner too ofc ;) They are very attentive when it comes to aftercare, they’ll help their partner get dressed and will make sure all their emotional needs are being met. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:*
People who have Venus conjuncting their Ascendant end up in relationships with ease, but these relationships also end just as quickly as they started.  
*:・゚✧*:・゚✧
The sexual endeavors of someone with Mars in the tenth house are publicly known. Their nudes may get leaked, and their past partners like to brag about shared sexual experiences. 
2K notes · View notes
angxlofvenus · 10 months
Note
hi, hi, hi! could I request the brothers + diavolo during a meeting together when their s/o (the mc) starts to doze off and then suddenly faint? Turns out, the MC forgot to drink water that day-
That happened to mr a few days ago, it wasn't fun - so here's a reminder for you to drink some water too :')
Thank you so much for the request!!! I am so so sorry to hear that happened, I hope you're doing better <3 If anything in this post seems insensitive please let me know! Have a wonderful rest of your day/night
Genre: Mostly fluff, Some Hurt/Comfort Ship: Demon Brother+Diavolo x reader (individual) TW: Minimal cussing, mentions of fainting, mass panic, yelling, second person pov for reader (If I missed anything please tell me!!)
When You Faint
You watched as the clock slowly ticked by the minutes as the Demons around you spoke amongst themselves, Your talking had slowly come to a stop as the room started to spin, Some of the men looked at you strangely but nobody expected you to fall out of your chair and onto the council room floor...
Tumblr media
Lucifer
He's immediately up out of his chair
Oh lord, he’s now fully in mother mode-
Barking orders at everyone, Yes this includes Dia
As soon as he gets over to you his wings are out, shielding you from everyone else
Once you come to, He isn’t letting you out of his sight
And once he finds out you fainted because of dehydration? 
He would so buy you one of those big ass waterbottles 
One of these mfs
Mammon
Freaking out pt. 1
Definitely hootin’ and hollering
He is indeed making a scene
Won’t really be on you until after you wake up because he knows Lucifer and Diavolo can do more for you then he can
After you have awoken though? He isn’t letting you out of his sight
You don’t have to worry about remembering to drink water, He’s there to remind you now!
Humans are such fragile creatures and now that he's seen that firsthand, He will barely let you do anything
He will make sure you are healthy whether you like it or not dammit
Levi
Freaks out pt. 2
Somehow freaking out even more then Mammon
He doesn’t know what to do! He leaves his room one time and this is what happens!
Will kind of just stand there in shock as everyone erupts into chaos
He isn’t the best example of someone who looks after their body lets be honest
But when ya’ll are gaming You’ll start to see some more healthy options popping up in the mix of chips and soda
He will beat himself up over not noticing, Please comfort this man before he decides you resent him
He won’t ever really bring it up but rest assured, It will never happen again
Satan
Would also run to your aid
He has read a lot of medical books in his time, He knows what to do
Would take you to a doctor afterwards, just in case
Kind of beats himself up for being unaware of your condition
I don’t think he’d freak out as badly after the incident, He knows it was probably a one time thing
Will bring up in conversation casually if you’ve eaten and drank water today, just to be sure
Tumblr media
Asmo
Screams
Freaks out pt. 3
Yelling at Lucifer/Satan to do something!
Will be all over you as soon as you’re awake
Don’t scare him like that! 
Will get extra pouty when he learns why you passed out
Has Ya’lls self-care sessions meant nothing to you?!
No more of that, not on his watch
He will offer you water at random times throughout the day
Studying? Water! Watching Tv? Water! Sleeping? Water! no, no, Beauty sleep is important
Beel
Doesn’t knows what's happening, Why are you on the floor?
Will stand on the sidelines concerningly as he watches Lucifer take over, He trusts his brother to help you
Will also feel immense guilt he didn’t see the signs, He just wants to keep everyone safe 🙁
When he thinks Ya’ll are doing something too straining for a human, He’ll stop to ask if you’re okay/ need a break
Will start carrying around a water bottle specifically for you 
Belphie
He totally wasn’t sleeping when it happened, nope
Woke up to his brothers and the Prince of the Devildom freaking out around you
I don’t think he’d really get too involved with helping since he doesn’t actually know wtf just happened
If you don’t immediately perk back up, He’s gonna cuss out Lucifer and maybe try to fight him
Gets a little snappy at everyone (except you ofc) after the incident
He even started to set alarms on your DDD as reminders to drink water
Will tease you just a teeny bit, But you can tell how worried the entire thing actually makes him
Diavolo
Was over to you in record time
Commands everyone to step back from you while he calls Barbatos and a royal doctor
You will be given the best treatment don't worry
He thinks he's being very sneaky about making you drink more water He is so obvious about it, it hurts
You will definitely notice how Barbatos now almost immediately refills your glass as soon as it’s half full
Another one to openly ask if you’ve drank enough water that day
Tumblr media Tumblr media
3K notes · View notes