#and i DO have the time. im just fucked in the head and the prospect of having a conversation with another person where i again

[widevibratobitch]

omw to play emotional support for my mom disguised as ✨fun family bonding time✨ for the rest of the week <3333 there's something so deeply wrong with me uwu teehee

#and i still havent texted my friend back even tho she texted me a week ago and i told her ill text her back this week when i have the time #and i DO have the time. im just fucked in the head and the prospect of having a conversation with another person where i again #have to pretend im not at the very brink of a serious mental and emotional breakdown. is making me lose my fucking mind #ik she's having a bad time rn and she needs the reassurance and jesus fucking christ i tried i had two long conversations with her #that were allllll about her. only her. not a single word about me. that's fine. this is what people need in such moments right #to just get patted on the head and hugged and told their suffering is real and what happened to them is unfair and just made to feel #that for a moment they're the centre of attention and it is all about them. this is normal. this is why therapy exists. #so i try to give this to her but it is fucking draining. and i NEVER get the same treatment back. like she caught me crying at uni last week #and like yes she'll say some nice things but she'll always find a way to turn the conversation back on the topic of ✨her✨ #like we started talking about my therapy and i finally got to actually say a word or two about what im dealing with. but then she goes #'yeah im just trying to figure out what's wrong with me when i listen to you haha like i could never cut myself cause it looks ugly. #ofc it doesnt look ugly on you haha but i could never lol' #like thanks haha good to know ill just shut up then and steer the conversation back onto you why dont i. i mean its not like #i spent over an hour a few days back sitting with you and listening to your talk about your childhood and validating you and not saying #a word a single fucking word about myself even tho i was also going through it myself but who cares right. and now im the bad guy again #because im not texting back. #i feel like im finally fucking snapping cause at this point im properly fucking angry. IM having a bad time too. IM going through it too. #I have bad coping skills and had a fucked up childhood and traumas in my life TOO and im allowed to just not be able to handle it #i really wanna break something lol maybe therapy's working after all lmao #oh also this is why i dont eat breakfast. i do it once and then feel guilty and suicidal lol normal behaviour #pojebie mnie zaraz przysięgam na boga mam dość kurwa BASTA

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...

#sometimes u have a day thats just so. i cant even. its seems 2023 is my year of rage #directionless rage. i guess im mad at me but instead of being directed inward it just goes out into empty space #im just fucking. im at my saturation point #its a good thing i stopped taking measurements yesterday and went to the store tomorrow bc im so fucking #mostly bc i noticed a problem with the code for a paper that is fucking less than a day away from being locked in on acceptance #and now its like fucking i have to go through and change a lot and im also less than 48hrs away from another massive project starting #that will occupy my whole fucking waking nightmare of a life. so its a good thing im level headed. its a good thing i can accept my fuck #ups with honestly. bc im so fucking. ive had it. im up to fucking here with everything and i just want it to be done #im fucking full of bitterness and black bile and i want to break things. and whose fault is it? fucking mine #bc im too fucking exhausted constantly all the time to fucking pay attention to what im doing and notic that a fucking function isnt #working properly. fuck u fuck u fuck u. so what r we gonna do abt it? #idk well see what my boss says. i already texted her that news and its good bc at least i caught it but god its so fucking irritating #god. will i b told off for this? maybe. i probably deserve it. haha if so that will send me for an absolute tailspin. i cannot stand to #feel ive done something wrong. even when i kno i have. last time i had a total freakout meltdown and made v bad choices and that wasnt even #this bad. so its a good thing im currently fairly stable bc the desire to make bad choices is very strong #im just so sick and tired of everything and i want to let things implode bc im vindictive against myself. but we must not do that we must #be reasonable. so idk we may have to withdraw the paper. whatever i dont give a fuck. itll get accepted elsewhere. i dont fucking care #leave me alone to dissolve into the dirt and set my data ablaze to be helpful to no one. erase my Prospective impack. i don't fucking care #anyway today sucked. i might have to stay up all night trying to fix this. ensuring that i fuck up the start of the looming project yayyyyy #i hate it here. i stopped having fun over a year ago #itll b fine. im just fucking. im full im impotent rage #unrelated

[ginkgo-phyta]

I'm back again 😅

Hopefully, I'm not the only person with this opinion, but how do you think Spencer would react if his significant other told him that they thought he looked hot with his bulletproof vest on? 👀

omg is this injured spencer request anon?? I NEED TO KNOW im so sorry if it's not tho, whoever you are thank you so much for coming back!! i love you with all my heart you should use a special emoji as like ur own lil signature! :D

okay so i wanted to try blurb(?) format but mmm okay not really cuz just a wall of text was stressing me out but this is def more informal than my other work (look no capital letters!) and because i love you so much i present two scenarios for you :P... i cant fight this feeling anymore guys he rlly is so hot in his vest im becoming my most feral self grrrrr RAH RAH ALRIGHT hope you enjoy, my love!

OKAY SO SPENCER REACTING TO YOU TELING HIM HE'S HOT IN HIS FBI VEST gn! reader, fluff, second scenario a little steamy in tone but nothing explicit just h*rny vibes, no other warnings

if you weren't a profiler: you'd never thought about it before- spencer in his bulletproof vest. sure, you knew that his job required him to go into sticky situations where the prospect of gunfire was imminent and he would have to wear proper equipment, but you never put two nd two together. you never even thought of a kevlar vest as something that could be hot...until you saw a picture of him wearing it.

"what the hell is that." you blurt out, voice serious with hints of concern.

"huh?" spencer's as clueless as ever, a little worried about your reaction. he was just showing you random photos his team members had taken over the years, all printed out for easy viewing courtesy of the ever-so-accommodating penolope garcia. someone had taken a pic of a beautiful lake where the bau had saved yet another victim, the sun dipping below the horizon line of pine trees, painting the sky purple and pink. "um...the sunset?" spencer was confused, "i guess maybe it was kinda a weird time to take a photo, but no one was hurt and we caught the unsub and the sky really did look-"

you cut off his rambling with a wave of your hand, eyes never leaving the photo in front of you, "no, no...what's that." you point to what you were talking about, a figure standing off to the side.

spencer takes a minute, becoming even more bewildered "...me?" in that moment your world changed.

"oh my god... "you whispered in a daze, firmly pulling the picture out of spencer's fingers and into your own, "what...what are you wearing?"

"honey what's wrong? it's just my bulletproof vest. i know it might look a little funny, but it, y'know, keeps me alive..." he scratches the back of his neck. a couple seconds of silence pass, but to spencer it feels excruciatingly long.

"spencer," you look at up at him deadpan "you look so fucking hot." to say your boyfriend was shocked would be an understatement.

he was absolutely blown away by your response, so much so that the way his face contorted looked borderline disgusted. "wha-what?? huh? what?" he clamored, eyes flitting over your face to find any sign you were joking.

"seriously, baby, you look so good. oh, my God!!" you almost shriek, gripping the picture tighter, the widest, dumbest grin pulling up your cheeks as you giggle like a schoolgirl.

spencer smiles at your reaction, still a little perplexed "you really think so?" the notion begins to sink into his bones, making him giddy.

you very enthusiastically nod your head, "are there any more pictures of you like this?" you rip the rest of the photos out of spencer's hands, scouring through them at light speed. out of nowhere, spencer laughs out loud, his nose scrunching in delight.

"i...don't know what to say. i'm flattered you think that," a wonderful blush shimmers over his cheeks, "but no i don't think there are. sadly." he playfully adds.

you stop all movements, slowly turning towards him, suspiciously calm. "well then," you grab your phone and suddenly stand up "looks like i'll just have to ask penelope for some!"

"wait! wait, no!" spencer calls after you as you start speed-walking away, your shirt barely escaping his fingertips. he yells out your name, his serious tone interrupted by a giggle of his own as he begins chasing you, "get back here!" he knows: garcia can never ever find out about this...

if you were a profiler: you had seen spencer don his FBI branded bulletproof vest hundreds of times over the years. although you had pined over him for years and were now finally in a relationship with him, seeing him like that didn't make you feel any type of way really. sure, you thought he looked strong and handsome, but most of the time you were too caught up in the case or situation at hand to focus on how he looked. until now. something had shifted in him in the last few months, not just with his ever-changing haircut, but within the way he held himself; more confident, more sure of himself, even more cocky, if you will. whatever it was, it drew your eyes to him in his tight little vest like a lightbulb draws in moths- instantly and continuously. it all came to a head when you caught the unsub responsible for drowning and resuscitating his victims until they couldn't be brought back to life. spencer dove into the lake with emily to apprehend the killer while you had helped the kid he had hostage reunite with his mother. you smiled at the scene in front of you, the teenager running into his mother's shaking arms, her holding him close in a tight embrace. another good ending, you thought to yourself before turning back to watch your fellow profilers make the arrest. suddenly, you mouth goes dry. there spencer reid stood; soaking wet, clothes sticking to his skin, chest rising and falling as he panted to catch his breath, his hand pushing his wet hair out of his face. and that stupid, goddamn kevlar vest. oh, fuck. the others walked away from the dock to situate everyone and themselves in respected vehicles that sat back on the road a few hundred feet away from where you currently were. as spencer moved to follow behind emily, hands trying to flick the water off of him, your gaze stopped him in his tracks. he stood there, a bit confused as to why you were walking towards him, seemingly entranced, instead of beelining behind everyone else.

he spoke out your name, but you remained silent, stopping just a couple feet away from him. you took him in one more time: the way his shirt became translucent, granting you with peeks of his skin; his sleeves rolled up, showing off his delicious forearms; the way his soaked pants choked his thick thighs. you became woozy with desire. spencer watched as your eyes dragged over his figure, drinking in every inch of his dripping body. "oh, baby..." you voice drawled out as soon as your gaze landed on his bulletproof vest, "you're absolutely soaking wet." spencer's eyebrows shot up his forehead at the suggestive twinkle in your timbre. you approached him further, chest just inches away from his. if he wasn't so intrigued by your reaction, he would have been a bit more cautious of lingering teammates. your hands came up to ghost over his vest, "did i ever tell you how good i think you look in this?" you looked up at him through your lashes.

spencer chuckled, "in the bulletproof vest?" you nodded in response, but spencer still couldn't really believe it. "uh, no, actually, you haven't." his eyes glinted at the way you bit your lip, his hands moving on their own accord to rest on your hips. you could feel droplets of water seep into the material and lick your skin, but you didn't give a rat's ass.

"well, you do." you whisper, hands wrapping around the back of his neck as you pull yourself up to press a kiss to his lips, "really, really good." your mouth moves enticingly with his.

"oh? is that so?" he whispers against your lips, diving back in, his fingers digging in your hips. he graciously kisses you for a moment before it dawns on him that you're both still at work- in an active crime scene, at that. "mmh, mmh!" he vocalizes between kisses as he tries to move his head back a smidge. his eyes peak open just enough to see if anyone else was around. your lips are addicting, rendering him unable to fully tell you to stop, unable to fully pull away himself. he's relieved when he spots no one. still, he know this is far from appropriate. spencer's hands move up your body to wrap around your wrists behind him, pulling them away from him and the same time he pulled away from you, "okay, okay!" he breathes out with a chuckle, "i believe you now" he tries to catch his bearings, but your pouting face causes him to laugh again

"spencerrrr," you groan at the loss of your beloved's kisses and he turns you around and pushes you towards the spot where the others vanished, walking behind you with his hands on your shoulders, your body held at an arm's distance.

"let's go, angel." his words brought out a hmph! from you. "we can do more of that later at home" he whispers, leaning in ever-so-slightly.

you turn your head back to get a glimpse of him, your eyes and smile equally wide with excitement, "can you bring the vest with you?!"

A/N: OKAYYYY lemme stop myself before things get filthy LOL do yall know which episode im referring to in the second scenario? that end scene will always get me my eye are GLUED to spencer the entire time GODDAMN. okay anyway i hope you liked this anon!!! pls tell me yalls thoughts <3

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds #spencer reid fanfiction #criminal minds fanfiction #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid smut #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #dr spencer reid #matthew gray gubler x reader #criminal minds fic

[justmeinatree]

please please please (NO PRESSURE BUT) (IM BEGGING YA)

something extremely smutty where like niall is working out: (literally need nothing else completely go ham its up to you but just like LOOK:)

the little jerk as he lifts up yk what im talking aboutt lets not pretend we're not *respectfully* looking.

as if i could say no to this 😅 it’s not the smuttiest thing, but if we’re open to a part 2, there’s a lot of room to play 😏

Word Count : 1.3k

it was the breathy grunts that first got your attention. 

you’d never cared much for niall’s workouts, always preferring to have the quiet time, enjoying a cuppa, maybe a book or tv show. but as you were just getting cozy with your tea, pulling the blanket over your legs, you could hear him from down the hall.

it piqued your interest, the sounds he was making having reached your ears, and for some reason, shooting down to your centre, leaving a little tingle of interest.

and for that same reason, you were now leaving your warmth and comfort, flinging the blanket back over the arm of the couch, trudging down the hall. 

once you pop head around the doorframe though, eyes coming into contact with your boyfriend, the tingle of interest in your cunt quickly turned to a dribble of excitement.

because fuck, was this the scene you’d been missing out on all these years ? you’ll have to remember to scold yourself for that one later, but for now, your brain was short wiring. niall was currently laying on his exercise mat, legs bent up at the knees, slightly spread, his arms straight up above his head, doing some sit ups with an exercise ball in his hands. and, since the universe wanted to punish you even more, with every flex of his abs, his hips would thrust up just a bit with the force of the movement. 

he was glistening, a sheen of sweat all over his skin, torso bare for your eyes to ogle. and when did your drip of excitement turn into a full fledged puddle of arousal ? how long had you been watching ? why are you quite literally feeling yourself leaking down your inner thighs ? 

it’s once he lays back down, taking a moment to breathe between sets, that you make your presence known. you weren’t exactly trying to, but a small whimper managed to escape your throat without permission. but really, his entire body was stretched out, muscles flexed, and if you look really closely, you can see the outline of his cock through his shorts. you really can’t be blamed.

niall’s eyes flick over to the door, noticing you, quirking his eyebrow, “what is it, love ?”

you bite your lip, heat rising on your cheeks at the prospect of being caught. however, niall was your boyfriend, had been for a long time, and moments like this don’t much embarrass you anymore, “d’you always look this good while you workout ?”

a loud breathy chuckle erupts from niall, echoing through the room, “gonna start joining me, sweet girl ?”

you squint at him, tilting your head to the side, looking at him with a playfully untrusting look, “was this your plan all along ?”

and so maybe he wanted to see if being a little louder than usual, a little more grunty than usual, would make you come over. and maybe he chose to forego his shirt, and maybe he spread his legs a tiny bit more than usual, in an effort to keep you around. “does it really matter now ?” he smiles innocently, “can see how wet your thighs are getting.”

“i hope you plan on doing something about that,” you smirk, shaking your head at your boyfriend’s antics.

“can’t do anything from way over there,” he hums, nodding his head in a come hither motion, “c’m’ere.”

as you finally step into the room, waltzing over to niall, he quickly reaches out for your ankles, his sheer strength taking over your moment of weakness, making you stop with your feet spread on either side of his head, eyes locked straight up between your thighs.

it was still early enough in the day, you hadn’t changed from your sleep shorts, tiny piece of fabric without any panties, something niall typically likes to tease you about, “why even wear anything if you’re gonna put those on,” he always drones on before bed.

but for now, he’s not complaining a bit, a fairly good view of your sopping cunt, peaking through the drenched fabric, arousal coating your inner thighs, “s’a good thing i’m parched,” he groans, hands gliding up your calves, stopping behind your knee, abruptly giving a tug, making your legs buckle. you squeak loudly, echoing through the room, as you were caught off guard, knees colliding with the mat underneath niall.

with your cunt sitting right above his face, niall groans, feeling the hot hot heat radiating off of you, “christ, and i thought i was warm,” he mumbles, his tongue darting out to lick along your skin.

he swirls around your thigh, taking his sweet time, lapping up any bit of arousal that’s made it way past your shorts, before moving onto the other thigh.

your legs were trembling, head tipped back, as your breathing accelerates. he was avoiding any area near your pussy, every ounce of your being aching for more. more tongue, more touches, more niall. more, more, more.

but once your skin was cleaned up, he pats your legs, groaning, “perfect post workout snack. think m’gonna jump into the shower now, baby.”

your eyebrows furrow immediately, because absolutely the fuck not, “like hell you are,” you quip, shuffling yourself until your centre is hovering right above his stiffening member. “you clean me, i clean you,” you murmur, leaning down over him.

and just like he did for you, your tongue slowly laps up the beads of sweat over his stomach and chest, feeling the ridges of his abs with every stroke. 

your eyes flutter shut, the musky, heady scent of sweaty man wafting through the air, the salty taste on your tongue, it was doing things you never could have imagined. not once had you really given workout niall a chance like this, something he always does much too early in the morning for your liking. but the more you were delving into it, the more your brain was swirling with want. with need.

you couldn’t stop, too caught up in licking as much of him as you could, tongue flicking over his nipples, mouth attaching to his pulse point. 

and it was working. you were teasing him right back. his telltale little breathy pants huffing against your ear whenever you were close to his neck, fingernails indenting your hips, his cock now painfully hard.

you’re not even sure niall’s noticed that his hips have started rolling, searching for any sort of relief, something you’re not too keen on giving into quite yet. 

so a moment later, you pull away, coming to a stand, “better get that shower going, we have some things to do today.”

niall scrubs his face in his hands, groaning loudly for a moment, before getting up with you. and as quick as a flash, he’s got you scooped up in his arms, running off.

you squeal again, laughing loudly, as he whips down the hall, around the corners, and into the washroom. he quickly closes the door behind himself, setting you down on your feet, pinning you against the wall, “can forget about all those things you have planned today. gonna be too busy.”

you hum, your body melting against the wall, as niall’s mouth leaves a trail of open mouth kisses over your shoulder and neck, teeth nibbling on the shell of your ear, “hmm tell me. tell me what we’re gonna do.”

“gonna start by showering with me,” he murmurs against your ear, “and if you’re a good girl, i might use the shower head on you.”

you whimper, nodding quickly, “please, fuck. what else ?”

niall tuts, shaking his head, “depends how good you are for me. now how about stripping down and washing me off in the shower ?”

“yes, yes anything. m’a good girl, i promise.”

……

Masterlist

#niall horan #niall horan writings #niall horan smut #smut #niall horan fic #niall horan fanfic #niall horan fanfiction #niall horan x you #niall horan x reader #niall horan blurb #niall horan imagine #niall horan one shot #niall horan masterlist #one direction #hello lovers #writings #justmeinatree

[samkerrworshipper]

the call up

leah williamson x reader

please keep sending requests in i need some fuel!

angst, panic attacks, pain, mentions of abuse of power, mentions of abuse, a short 4000 words im posting this at 2am so sorry for any typos or little things i might have missed x

my heart breaks for the espwnt as they navigate their current situation and i’ve been thinking a lot about it so here’s this little fic ❤️

blurb: you got the news notification, not a text, not a call, a fucking new notification that had broken your heart into a million different pieces

———————————————————————

I was consciously ignoring the sound of furious knocking against the bathroom door, but not on purpose. I felt like I couldn’t breathe, I’d felt that way ever since I’d gotten the news notification and then the follow up text from Alexia asking if I was okay. No I wasn’t okay, but I’d told her I was fine anyway. It was a blur to me what had happened after that, I’d thrown my phone at a wall, knowing that my phone was probably 30 seconds off of lighting up furiously with more notifications. How could they do this to us? How could they do it to me? After that I’d stumbled my way into my ensuite, finding it hard to see properly with the tears that were crowding my eyes. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t think beyond the thought of how this was actually happening.

I’d staggered my way into the shower, cranking the water to its highest point and sitting myself down on the floor. I was bawling my eyes out but I couldn’t really feel it, all I felt was numbness, overwhelmingly numb. The shower water was boiling hot but the searing liquid felt perfect against my skin, it did wonders to comfort the iciness inside of me. It also drowned out the neverending sound of me sobbing furiously into my own skin. I was still wearing my clothes, still dressed in the same t-shirt and shorts that I’d been wearing when I’d gotten the notification. I was scratching furiously at my legs, seeking out the relief that the mixture of pain and burning gave me.

How was this the world that we were living in? How was it that in the current world that we lived in I didn’t even have a basic human right? I was a sobbing, trembling mess just thinking about it all.

How was I supposed to go there and pretend that everything was fine, that I didn’t want to claw my throat out just at the thought of being in the presence of some of those people. It was insanity, pure insanity. I was a fucking world champion, one of the best players in the world and yet here I was, back to square one. What was the point in us even signing a treaty if they were just going to flat out ignore it anyways. It made me sick to my stomach, in what world was this okay, in what world was this how we lived?

Leah would probably hate me, hate me for being ungrateful for the opportunity, hate me for not taking a chance to play when she couldn’t. I was being fucking childish, it shouldn’t have been that big of a deal, shouldn’t have been that upsetting. I was being given the opportunity to play the sport I loved for my country, so why did everything about it feel so wrong? Why couldn’t I find a part of my heart that was happy that I’d been called up, happy about the prospect of playing for my country. I should have been happy, should have been excited, should have been bewildered that they were asking for me to come back even after I’d told the press about all the abuse, it was a miracle really. My heart went out to Mapi, my best friend who I knew would be absolutely devastated that she’d been called up, she’d rejected a call-up to the world cup because of her views and now that was invalidated, everything she’d stood for was going out the window, much like the rest of us.

It was the knocking that brought me out of my spiral, it was non-stop, loud and furious.

“Y/n, I’m coming in sweetheart.”

It was Leah’s voice, both so gentle and stern at the same time. I didn’t take my head out of my knees as I heard the door to our ensuite open, I must have forgotten to lock it in the flurry of emotions that had gotten me to the shower floor. I heard Leah step cautiously into the room, probably taking in her surroundings and the state I was in. Then I heard the door to the shower opening and I couldn’t help but pull my head out of the spot in between my legs to look at her. She looked flustered, her hair and clothes dishevelled and nothing like what they’d looked like when she’d left this morning to take our dogs on a walk and meet up with Keira for coffee.

“Oh darling.”

I knew I probably looked like a mess, mascara smudged all over my red eyes. She reached out to comfort me but immediately recoiled when her skin made contact with the water, letting out a string of profanities towards the water,

“Fuck, you’re burning yourself,” She said, her eyes flashing with fear as she reached towards the temperature dial, immediately turning it down to a more luke warm temperature.

“No, I need to feel clean,” I reached up to turn the water controls back to my previous temperature btu Leah’s hand stopped me, her hands gently gathering my own in hers.

“You are clean y/n,” Her voice was a mere whisper, her voice hoarse as she hurriedly slipped off her shirt and shorts before climbing into the shower with me, just left in her sports bra and boxer shorts.

“Dirty,” I choked out, flinching away from her as she snaked an arm around my body.

“You are not dirty y/n/n,” her voice was stern, she was speaking to me with the intention to get past my internalised barriers that were trying to block her out, trying to block out her attempts to convince me that my self deprecating thoughts were wrong.

As soon as she noticed my hands falling down to my legs to continue scratching at them to get some release she put a stop to it, her own hands intertwining with mine and bringing them to her chest.

“I know there are a lot of twisted thoughts going through your head right now sweetheart, I know that this whole situation is so fucked up, beyond it being okay but I’m here for you.”

I felt like I couldn’t breathe, like every breath that I was taking in was lacking in oxygen and everything I needed to be able to fucking breathe.

“How can they do this? How can they make us do this?”

Leah just shook her head at me, because we both knew she didn’t have an answer, that as much as I leaned on her to give me an answer for everything she just couldn’t in this situation.

“I don’t know.”

Her words were rocky, splotchy, it reflected everything that I was feeling in that moment.

“I’m sorry, I know I’m being ungrateful, I mean you can’t even play and I’m sitting her complaining about the fact I’m being given the opportunity to play,”

“You aren’t being given an opportunity, you are being forced to play. You are allowed to be annoyed about that, it’s not being ungrateful. We live in a world where as women we are supposed to be grateful about every single fucking opportunity we are given but this isn’t a opportunity my love, it’s fucking abuse, especially after what those men did to you.”

I shivered at Leah’s words, just thinking about everything that I’d given to that team just to be fucking abused and assaulted, it had taken so much therapy for me to acknowledge that it had been abuse, that it hadn’t been deserved, that I deserved better.

“I can’t go back, I can’t do it,” Leah nodded at me, pressing her lips to my forehead under the spray of the shower and nodding against my skin.

“That’s okay, we’ll sort it out, I’ll call Ale and we’ll figure it out. If you don’t want to go you don’t have to, we can't risk your mental health for fucking soccer.”

“They’ll take my licence, they’ll fine me, I’ll never be allowed back, they’ll find a way to invalidate my passport and I’ll never get to see my family again,”

“That’s a bridge we can cross, we’ll figure it out, what matters most is that you are okay.”

I didn’t feel okay, I felt like I was tearing at the seams, like seeing that news notification pop up on my screen as I’d been catching up on the most recent episode of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was probably the worst moment of my life.

“You do feel safe, y/n?”

I shook my head, burying deep into Leah’s neck, trying to get as far away from the world as I could.

“I love you y/n, I will never stop loving you, no matter what happens, you are stuck with me, so even if thats hard to believe I need you to know that, I need you to think about that. Let’s get you out of the shower, yeah?”

She was right, I didn’t believe her. I kept my cheek pressed into her neck as she lifted me up off of the floor and out of the shower, stripping off my layers and wrapping me in a towel, I refused to face her though, refused to look into those eyes.

“Can I carry you?” Her voice was so hesitant and before I could gather my thoughts, the ones that told me to push Leah away I found myself nodding.

She engulfed me in her arms so quickly it was as if she knew I was on the cusp of changing my mind, I still hadn’t stopped crying, my sobs had just quietened down into numb, soundless tears that somehow burned my cheeks as they dripped down my skin. My chest pressed against her own as she lifted me up and walked us into our room, our bedroom. I squeezed my eyes, trying my hardest to ignore how perfect it felt in that moment to be pressed against her, to be in her arms, how perfect it felt to be held by her.

She gently placed me down on our bed and I tried my hardest not to whimper at the loss of contact, she dashed off into our wardrobe, stumbling around in there for a few seconds before returning with a fresh matching bra and boxer set on herself and a sports bra and pair of boxer shorts for me. I didn’t even flinch as she pulled the items of clothing over my body, just went limp in her arms. Once she was done dressing me she climbed onto the bed beside me.

“Can I hold you?”

I nodded at her with tears in my eyes and she’d immediately wrapped both of her arms around me. She rested herself against the head of the bed and brought me into her lap so my back was pressed against her chest, it was the skin to skin contact that made me start to sob unapologetically and furiously. Leah was quick to tighten her grip on me and start to rock me back and forth in her arms.

“I’m so sorry this is happening to you sweetheart, I’ll do anything I can to fix it.”

Leah was a problem solver, furiously dedicated to helping out anyone that she could. In this instance though I couldn’t find anything that she could actually help with, what was there for her to do? No one could do anything, any effort, any attempt to try and make a change, for Jenni, for us all, was over.

“How am I supposed to go there and act all happy and grateful when all I want to do is tell them all fuck you, fuck you for doing this to me, fuck you for condoning the abuse for years, fuck you for covering it all up.”

My words came out in hiccups between the sobs, Leah waited for a few minutes before answering me, it got to the point where I was worried she wasn’t going to answer me at all.

“If you don’t want to stay and play you won’t have to, it’s against your rights and the FIFA code says so, fuck there bullshit law that says you have to go. We’ll talk with our lawyers, talk with Ale and Mapi and we’ll find a solution. If they make you play then you can sit on the field, you can fake an injury, get yourself red carded. We’ll find a solution, we’ll work it out.”

Everything Leah said made sense but it also didn’t, how was I supposed to go there, how was I supposed to walk in a building and try and reason with people I was terrified of, people that I now needed anti anxiety medication for, people that had given me years of trauma and PTSD.

It was then that we were both shaken by a furious banging from our front door, my mind went to the worst place possible. What if it was reporters, or people from fifa, or people from the Spanish federation? What if they’d come to take me, what if they were already here to take my licence or take me to jail?”

Leah sensed my distress and slid herself out from behind me.

“I’ll go take a look, stay here, it’ll be fine.”

Even her voice was unsure, like she didn’t even know if it was actually okay. She darted out of our room, I heard her thudding down the stairs and then making it to our front door. I heard her open it, which indicated to me it had to be someone we knew because if it was someone she didn’t want to see she would have looked through the peephole and left them. I heard the hushed voices of two people, maybe? Then the furiously fast footsteps of an amount of people I couldn’t make out. Within a few second though all was revealed to me as Alexia, Mapi, Lucy and Keira bursted into my room, Leah chasing after them. One look at them all had me sobbing again. Alexia and Mapi were quick to jump onto the bed beside me, I noticed the the tear tracks that were painting Mapi’s face as well and the red rims around her eyes. Mapi was my best friend in the entire world, we’d played with each other since we were kids. Alexia was like my older sister, she’d taken me under my wing as soon as I’d joined Barca as a rookie and she’d treated me like her own ever since. The two women meant more to me than anybody else, bar Leah and I knew that they both knew how much this would be tearing me up.

“How can they do this to us? After everything they’ve done?”

“Lo se mi amor, lo siento mucho.” (I know my love, I’m so sorry)

Ale’s voice didn’t do much to comfort me, if anything her familiar words that were spoken in our mother tongue just made it all pour out of me more.

The two english women in the room were lead out by Leah, the three of them sensing that this was a moment that us Spaniards needed to have on our own.

“No puedo hacerlo Ale lo siento pero no puedo hacerlo.” (I can’t do it Ale, I’m so sorry but I can’t do it.)

“It’s okay Mi amor, I understand. We are going to sort it out for you and Mapi, we’ll figure it out, you don’t have to be there if you don’t want to, they can’t force you.”

“Can’t they?”

It was the first time Mapi had gotten a word into the conversation and Alexia’s eyes immediately met hers in a glare, she was trying to stop me from working myself up even further and Mapi’s words weren’t helping.

“No they can’t María, we’ll work it out, I’ll sort it out for my girls, I’ll keep you protected, te prometo que.” (I promise you)

“You can’t make that promise, you didn’t protect us last time.”

The tension between the two was thickening and it was making me feel even smaller.

“I can try my hardest, last time it was different and you know it, this time we have an audience, we have people that we can trust to help us, we don’t have to be scared anymore, I am going to protect you, lo juro.”

I pressed myself further into Ale’s arms, finding solace and comfort in the older woman's arms.

“I’m scared, Ale.”

I felt Ale’s head nod against my own from its position balancing on top of mine, her head burrowing into my semi wet hair that Leah had partly dried with a towel.

“I know pequeño, you have every right to be scared, but I’ll keep you safe and if you want to go home after we negotiate with them then you can, no one is going to make you play.”

I nodded into Ale’s body, searching for Mapi’s hand and when I found it tangling it in my own, finding warmth and steadiness in her hand.

I could feel my body relaxing into Ale’s, the emotions of the last hour starting to hit me and affect my energy level.

“Go to sleep, cariño, rest, you need it.”

I’d nodded sleepily into Alexia’s body and let myself relax fully against her, letting all of the stress, fear and anxieties leave my body as the feeling of sleep started to overcome my senses.

When I woke up it was no longer light outside. I shot up in bed, realising I was alone and immediately clutching at my chest as I felt the anxiety overcome my body, I’d been deserted, because of my stupid fears about being called up, I deserved it, I was so weak, so stupid, so fucking unworthy of love and attention. It all came crashing down on me, like a massive wave, all of the feelings crashing down on top of me in an overwhelming cascade. I was gasping for air, frantically clawing the sheets of the bed off of my body, suddenly feeling overwhelmed, overheated and sweaty. I’d left a cold sweat patch on our bed sheets but it didn’t really bother me, I was so hot and it was so hard to breathe and I just couldn’t think.

The next thing I knew Leah was walking into our room with a cup of tea that she’d almost immediately dropped when her eyes had met mine, forgetting the cup and liquid and jumping directly onto the bed, her mind immediately reeling.

“Y/n/n, you're having a panic attack, I need you to breathe for me, how we’ve practised, you’re going to be okay, take some deep breaths for me.”

I’d gulped and nodded at Leah, we had practised it quite a bit, it didn’t make it any easier when this happened but it did reassure me that I knew how to do it.

Her hand had almost immediately found its way to my hunched over back, rubbing circles into the muscles along my back as I struggled to take in any oxygen.

“You’ve got it my love, deep breaths, in and out, it’s going to be okay, I’m right here.”

Leah’s voice was so soft, so comforting, like it was made of cotton and teddy bear fur.

“I thought I was alone and I-I thought you’d left me.”

My voice was so unsteady, so unlike me.

“I’m never leaving you honey, not if I can help it, I’m here for you, always by your side.”

She solidified her statement by pressing a gentle kiss to the side of my temple, I relaxed my scrunched up face against her mouth, trying to enjoy the feeling of it as much as possible.

“Good girl, keep taking those deep breaths for me, you're doing so well mi amor.”

Leah knew very little Spanish, I’d tried my hardest to teach her some, especially when she’d stayed with me in Barca but it just never stuck, she didn’t practise enough for it to stick, not that I minded, my mum was english so I’d spoken both since I was a child, my English was just as good as my Spanish so it wasn’t hard for me to converse with my partner.

Leah’s voice kept rubbing against my back, helping to guide me back down to earth from the panic induced cloud that I’d sent myself to. When I did finally come back down I started to take in my surroundings, the damp sheet below me, Leah’s breath against my neck, our dog and cat sitting on the edge of our bed, cuddled up together asleep.

“Hey angel, you back with me?”

Her voice was so gentle, so patient. Leah’s hand found its way to my face, brushing the loose brunette strands from my face and pushing them behind my ear. I felt shameful, I couldn’t handle looking into those eyes, those eyes that held a world's worth of care in them, the eyes that I knew could break me down into tears on their own accord.

“M’ sorry.”

“You’ve got nothing to be sorry for.”

Her reassurance was what I needed, I craved that reassurance, craved her approval.

“I just want this all to go away, I just want to be able to me be, just live how I want to.”

Leah pushed herself back against our pillows and pulled me with her, wrapping her arms around me and bringing me to her chest, her lips fell to my forehead out of habit, it was one of her favourite things to do, I loved the connection.

“You can be you, you are allowed to be upset about this, there is nothing wrong about being angry about what is happening to you.”

I let my head find a nook in Leah’s body and relax into it properly, finding so much peace in her.

“I just want this to all be over, better yet, never have happened.”

“Fair enough, you’ve dealt with enough bullshit to last you the rest of your life, you are allowed to be angry about that, anything you feel is valid, your life has been turned upside down by a bunch of old white men who don’t care about anybody besides themselves and it sucks, it sucks that most of the men in power across our world are the same and that we can’t really do anything to change that. I’m here for you though, so is Ale and Mapi and everyone else that cares about you. It sucks, but that's what we have and maybe it’s enough, maybe it’s all we really need.”

I nodded along with Leah’s words, she was so wise, so smart considering her age. It was one of the things I admired her so much for, how she knew so much but was also prepared to educate herself on something that she wasn’t sure about. She was always wanting to be better, to learn more, it was jarring for me when I’d met her, having come from a very traditional family and set of views.

“Go back to sleep my love, we’ll work this all out in the morning, I promise.”

“Pinky swear?”

She’d rolled her eyes at me but nodded regardlessly, knowing that if she didn’t my anxieties would creep up and I’d probably send myself into another fit.

“I pinky swear.”

#woso #leah williamson #lionesses #woso community #marry me rn #arsenal wfc #leah williamson x reader #fc barcelona #espwnt #alexia putellas #mapi leon #gut wrenching #angst #depression #panic attacks #i’m crying

[sugawarassoulmate]

im foing thru a bully!osamu brain rot so imagine samu pissing reader off somehow (like collaterally: i imagine him fucking up and KNOWING he fucked up) n is trying to do some damage control by being the sweetest he's ever been I JUST WANT TO SEE HIM GROVEL

i Imagine him to be piss scared at the prospect of u ever breaking up w him over smth he did jendkd

i am incapable of not writing a happy ending for these two idiots

words: 805 cw: fem!reader, post-love confession bully!osamu, jealousy, arguing, insecurity, implied breakup, sfw but minors dni always

honestly, bully!osamu's biggest problem is his jealousy and it's something he still struggles with even after you become official. at first, you kind of deal with it, but as his girlfriend now, you wish he'd trust you enough and get over it.

"i'm tired of having the same argument with you, again and again, samu," you finally said after so much back and forth.

he really did it this time.

you and a classmate were working on a project together worth a big part of your final mark, which obviously meant spending a lot of time together. of course, osamu had a problem with it since it was a guy.

you tried to be understanding—you texted samu every time you were with him and you always did work in the library so you two would never be totally alone. but that wasn't enough for osamu. he still found a way to get upset and grill your partner to the point where he was considering talking to your professor about working with someone else.

when he apologized for it, you, you'll admit you blew up on him a bit.

"it's not just about the stupid project, samu. but thanks soooo much for making that situation harder than it needed to be," you snap, taking him by surprise since you've never raised your voice at him.

"but what's gonna happen in the future? do you just not trust me? i'm sick of feeling guilty about something that it's my fault." after stopping for a moment and catching your breath before sighing. "sometimes i think you're never going to change..."

and osamu doesn't like that. the way the tone of your voice changed just then. panic immediately sets in when you leave the room without looking back at him.

he goes into damage control, but he isn't sure what to do. osamu's never been one to apologize before and if he did, it wasn't in words. he's pretty sure cooking a meal or fucking you won't get him out of this one.

he asks no begs for your forgiveness. it's so stupid, of course, he trusts you. sometimes osamu gets in his own head and doesn't want anyone to have you, but that's immature of him.

osamu gives you some space before he apologizes—holding onto your waist as he tells you how right you are and how he's going to make things right. first, he goes to your project partner and apologizes to him as well (it stings to do so, but osamu knows it's right)

your partner accepts and agrees to continue working with you so neither of your grades is jeopardized. but osamu knows it's not enough.

it starts with breakfast in the morning because hey, he's gifted with amazing cooking skills and he's gonna use them. osamu makes your favorite and serves it to you in bed.

the stern smile on your face tells him that you appreciate the gesture but you're still upset, which he expected.

for the record, miya osamu does not grovel, but he'd be lying if he said your words didn't scare him a little bit. sucking up his pride, osamu kneels next to the bed and takes one of your hands.

"i do trust you, baby," he breathes, choosing his words carefully so as to not upset you.

you pick at the food sitting on the tray. "it doesn't feel like you do sometimes. and it's not just my project partner, but it's our friends. i can see you getting uncomfortable when suna's around and — fuck, samu sometimes i swear you think i'm gonna run off with your brother or something."

ok, that hurt, but he deserves it.

he takes another deep breath. "i will work on it. yer my girlfriend and i trust ya," he says with a steady voice. "and next time i'm bothered by somethin', i'll talk to ya instead of lashin' out."

that perks you up a bit. "and?"

"and...i'll be better about you hangin' out with tsumu and suna. they're yer friends too and i shouldn't be so possessive."

finally, finally you give him a smile, leaning over for a quick kiss. "samu, was that so hard?" you said, running your fingers through his hair. "that's all i want to hear."

for the first time, osamu can breathe easy. the sweetness in your voice is back and you're actually eating his food — a sight he'll never get tired of. "shit, baby, ya had me scared for a second,”

your eyes harden for just a moment. “don’t get too comfortable, samu. changed behavior means more than just an apology.”

and just like that your smile is back, the revolving door of emotion gives osamu whiplash that he’s never experienced before, but he’s more than willing to work on himself if it means you’ll stay.

©sugawarassoulmate 2022 all rights reserved - please do not repost/translate my work on other platforms!

#haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #osamu x reader #osamu miya x reader #miya osamu x reader #osamu #osamu miya #🍑 #🍑osamu #bully!osamu

[dirtysvthoughts]

𝓟 𝓡 𝓘 𝓥 𝓐 𝓣 𝓔 𝓓 𝓐 𝓝 𝓒 𝓔 𝓡 - CHAPTER THREE

pairing: prospective club owner! joshua x stripper! reader

word count: 2.2k

general tags/warnings: smut, pwp, worldbuilding before the dirty stuff (be patient 😉), female! reader, mildly cocky! shua, dom! shua, power play/brat! reader, full nudity for reader, use of pet names (love, baby, sweetheart), shua tries to get reader to fall for him but to no avail (or yes avail?)

playlist songs: special affair - the internet, give me head - sweet the kid, na na - trey songz

notes: chapter 3 baybeeeee! sorry this took so long, but it’s finally here! i’m gonna start working on chapter 4 and that should be done vv soon! hope you enjoy besties!

taglist: @im-gemmy @enhacolor @hooniewnderland @svtup @kawaiikels @weeevrse @diorsfxck @kyexvly @woozarts @ifuckcheol @marsstarxhwa @haoxiaoba

“and i’m telling you, i don’t need any help, take your service elsewhere,” your boss, mia, says over the phone, curtly hanging it up afterwards. “fucking nuisance,” she mumbles under her breath as you enter her office.

“somethin’ happen?” you say as you shut the door behind you, away from prying eyes and listening ears.

“shouldn’t you be getting ready, sage?” mia says not even looking in your direction, fiddling with whatever paperwork is in front of her.

you roll your eyes, “it’s 5 PM, i only came here early to practice my new routine. plus, i needed to ask you something, but then i overheard you. you know i’m one of the few people you actually trust here. so seriously, what was that all about?”

she stops messing with the papers and finally directs her eyes towards you, breathing a heavy sigh. “okay, so you know the club has a few more debt payments before i can solely own this place right? well, this man i was on the phone with can more than likely wipe away the rest of the debt with a snap of a finger.”

“so if he can do that, why would you tell him to fuck off? i don’t get it.”

“because he wants to own majority of the business! all of the creative decisions, finances, even down to the dancers’ employment would be his decision. i’m not doing that! i’ve worked way too hard to get to where illusion is today. and do you know how many strip club owners are women? not a whole lot. this is my pride.”

you both sit in a minute of silence, her words repeating in your mind. she was right, so much went into this club and those who weren’t on the pole proved that a club could run without a man’s help or approval. and you knew your boss wasn’t desperate enough to give in just yet.

“well no one but you is gonna run club illusion. fuck another owner or a co-owner,” you firmly say as mia shakes her head and smiles, now directing her attention at her desktop, moving her mouse around.

“why do i like you so much, sage?”

“i dunno, i guess i have that effect on people,” you smile as you push your hair back, opening the door so you could start getting ready.

“by the way,” you say with one foot out the door, “what was the guy’s name?”

“somethin’ hong, i kept forgetting the name, why? does it ring a bell?”

“nah, just wanna have a name in mind just in case he shows up, you know they like doing that.”

“well let’s hope not,” she groans as she stretches her arms out. “i really don’t need the extra stress - i can already tell tonight’s gonna be extra for no reason.”

and crazy enough, your boss was right. security had to break up two fights, one of the dancers ended up getting sent home (she was overly drunk), and a bartender ended up quitting - all in the span of four hours.

you look at the clock on the wall, readjusting your bodysuit straps and making sure your makeup was still intact. it was finally midnight, which hopefully meant the rest of the night would be better until it was time for the club to close.

“crazy ass night huh?” your closest friend and fellow dancer, hana (also known as chardonnay) approaches you. she finds her makeup kit and grabs a brush, dolling up her face.

“who are you tellin? and it’s only thursday! if heads into the weekend,” you say but hana finishes your thoughts.

“oh hello no, do not manifest that energy. this weekend can be busy, but not crazy,” she puts her kit back in her corner and checks herself out.

min then walks into the dressing room, hastily scanning the area for one person. “hana!” she calls out, slightly panicking. “you have a whole party waiting for you and you’re talking in the dressing room?”

“i know min, i just had to make sure i was ready, sheesh,” hana rolls her eyes. “gimme five and i’ll be out. they can wait.”

“you better hurry up,” min says walking away, “mia already has had to deal with a lot of shit and i’m pretty sure the last thing she wants to deal with is y’all acting out.” she closes the door behind her and the music becomes muffled again.

“lemme head out there before even more hell gets raised,” hana sighs as she switches her clear heels for her champagne-colored ones. “i guess i’ll see you out there in a bit.” she and a few others leave the room, leaving the space nearly empty.

——

after checking yourself out, you finally head back on to the scene, deciding to walk around and look for clientele since you already performed on the main stage for tonight.

as you get deeper into the center, you notice a figure at one of the small, standing tables. intrigued, you walked closer and your body can’t deny it’s reaction when you see how handsome he is. his dress white shirt had a few buttons opened, his black hair styled to where not all of it was in his face, and his eyes? oh you felt like you could melt in them.

when you finally get close enough, you place your hand on his shoulder and he looks up at you, putting his glass of whiskey down. “hey there,” you smile flirty at him, and he responds by smiling back at you.

“hey beautiful,” he says in the most soft, yet incredibly sexy tone. “i haven’t seen you around before, are you new here?”

“oh, so you’ve been here before,” you say going to the opposite side of the table, your eyes not leaving is. “that’s interesting, considering i’ve never seen you, i practically have a sixth sense when it comes to this place.”

“mmm, different days, different times, maybe,” he picks up his glass and takes a sip and when he puts it down, you reach for his hand and take hold of it.

“well that can’t stop us from getting to know each other better,” you rub his hands softly. “what’s your name?”

“hong. joshua hong, to be more specific,” he says. “and yours?”

you try to keep a poker face, but you fail drastically as your expression changes. “hong?” you think to yourself. “hong.. why does it sound so familiar?”

you mind then recalls the conversation with mia, and you slowly remove your hand from his. “w-wait a minute, hong? are you a club owner or something?”

“actually i am, how did-” you interrupt him by scoffing and shaking your head, not believing what could’ve happened.

“no fucking way.. you’re the man that called my boss earlier today weren’t you? about wanting to own this place?”

“yeah, that was me,” he says with all the pride he can muster and it made you a little annoyed. “this place has so much potential, and it’s becoming one of the most popular clubs in the area. with my help, it can reach that and more! everyone would benefit.”

“look, hong - whoever you are, this club is doing fine. mia didn’t need a savior before and she doesn’t need one now, especially from some cocky motherfucker who he thinks he can change everything just by walking into the room.” you walk away ready to find another customer, but he comes in front of and stops you.

“you’re bold as hell.. i love that in a partner,” joshus says grinning as he begins to kiss the side of your neck teasingly, his lips feeling like a soft pillow. your body and your mind are now drastically confused. yes, he was trying to take over the club and you didn’t want that, but you couldn’t deny your physical attraction to him either.

after a few more seconds, joshua pulls away and smirks at you, clearly enjoying the fact that you were starting to break down your walls. he takes something out of his pocket and slides it into your hand, and when you feel it - it’s a thick wad of cash.

“let’s go upstairs baby,” joshua says as he pulls you towards him, having you lead the way. watching your surroundings, you firmly grab his hand and you lead him to the vip rooms, walking up the steps and then finding the closest, empty room.

unable to hold back anymore (and away from any other eyes), you sharply pull him closer to you and smash your mouth against his, hands roaming his hair as he walks backwards. when he reaches the edge of the couch, joshua gently sits down and pulls you onto his lap, his hands now palming your ass. you lowly moan at the feeling as you begin to roll your hips into him, his touches becoming more firmer as he squeezes your cheeks.

“you couldn’t resist me, could you?” joshua laughs to himself. “just a second ago you were telling me off, and now you’re like putty in my hands.”

“fuck you,” you moan out when he starts playing with the crotch of your bodysuit, dragging two fingers over the cloth. he continues the motion until he can start to feel a familiar dampness.

“awww cute, you wanna fuck me,” he gloats, dragging his fingers into your bodysuit, playing with your inside lips. he continues the motion for a few moments and then you muster every good bone left in your body, to pry his fingers away from your now dripping core.

“fuck, i shouldn’t be doing this.. i really shouldn’t be doing this,” you say hesitantly.

“well why not? we’re already here aren’t we? no one has to know, baby. this’ll be our little secret, m’kay?”

and that was all you needed to hear. this was definitely something you’d be carrying with you to the grave.

“fine. one round and then that’s it-” you can’t even finish your sentence before joshua slams his lips once again on yours, this time with more vigor and fever.

——

for the millionth time tonight, your body and your mind are in two conflicting states. how could something this bad be so incredibly good?

“m-mmm, sh-shua,” you moan into his ear as he thrusts into you, your bodysuit completely off and his pants pooling down at his ankles. “you feel amazing,” you continue to feel him up, pressing down on his shoulders. joshua hisses at the feeling, guiding your hands down to his waist so you can see and feel what he was doing to you.

“that’s all you,” he smiles as you move a bit to match his pace, almost moaning with you at the new intensity you both set. “with me here, you could have this every night, hmmm, maybe even more than that to be real with you.”

he was really trying to get you over, but for your sake - it couldn’t happen.

“and with you here, you’d probably take out 20% of my pay,” you chuckle but it’s immediately cut off when joshua thrusts sharply into you, causing you to hunch over and moan, almost loud enough to where someone could hear you.

“i thought you needed to be quiet? you’re fucking the new potential owner, can’t have everyone finding out, right?”

“fuck, fuck, f-fuck,” you whisper, joshua not sure if that was from the sex or if you were still frustrated that your morals have gone out the window.

you feel a tightening in your core, and you knew any minute that you were about to come. as he continues to thrust into you, the coils in your become smaller and more detailed.

“joshua, shua, i- mmmm, i-!” you call out for him and moments later, you juices leak on him. you relax into his chest, regulating your breathing to a slower pace.

——

“this doesn’t mean anything you know,” your back facing him as he helps you fix the strings on your bodysuit. “i’ve already crossed some lines that i can’t return from.”

“i keep telling you sweetheart, no one has to know. you’re making it seem like you have to tell the whole world.”

several thoughts run through your mind, including ones of him railing you from behind in one of the secluded vip rooms. you try and push them out of your head when you finally speak.

“and if i did want to see you again, how would i go about that?” joshua then hands you a business card and pats your back, signifying that he was done.

“just gimme a call love.”

you both walk out the room, and he turns to face you again, leaving a kiss on your forehead. “see you soon, baby.” he walks away, leaving you dazed and in suspended motion. you almost don’t hear your name being called out.

“sage!” hana calls out to you and you walk over to her.

“who was that? he’s so fucking hot! how’d you bag him?”

you sigh as you lie through your teeth, “he’s no one special. just another customer.”

#seventeen smut #svt smut #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #seventeen x reader #svt x reader #seventeen fanfic #svt fanfic #joshua smut #hong joshua smut #hong jisoo smut #joshua imagines #hong joshua imagines #hong jisoo imagines #joshua fanfic #hong joshua fanfic #dsvtt: kenny’s works #dsvtt: private dancer

[wavypotatochips]

hi could you write something where the reader just moved in and her new house is next to mbappé’s one also her window is next to mbappé’s one so every time she gets changed she does it in front of the window to tease her new neighbor

𝙄 𝙆𝙣𝙤𝙬 | 𝙆𝙮𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙈𝙗𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙚 [ 𝙎𝙇𝙄𝙂𝙃𝙏 𝙉𝙎𝙁𝙒 𝘾𝙊𝙉𝙏𝙀𝙉𝙏 ]

𝘗𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: Kylian Mbappe x Female Reader

Word Count : 1k

𝘈𝘶𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘕𝘰𝘵𝘦: Im going to be completely honest with you.. I had so much trouble trying to write this because I was unsure how to execute it LOLZZZZ and I honestly believe I did a horrible job so I am soooooo sorry. Hopefully there's a chance that I executed it as you expected c': And as always-Thank you so much for requesting!! ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚!!

(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ Due to finals, I have not been able to write as much as I usually do and I'm currently catching up on current requests because I'm a little behind. If you would like to send a request, do so now as after this weekend, request will be temporarily unavailable. mwah mwah love ya! ♥

As you put away your freshly laundered clothes, you can't help but feel a surge of excitement course through you. You've been keeping a secret from your best friend, and it's time to spill the beans. "You won't believe who just moved in next door," you exclaim into the phone, your voice bubbling with anticipation. Your friend is intrigued and eagerly asks, "Who is it?"

You take a deep breath and respond with a name that elicits shock and awe, "Kylian!" The mere mention of his name sends a jolt of electricity through the phone line as your best friend squeals in disbelief. The famous soccer player and international heartthrob has taken up residence next door, and you can't help but feel a sense of excitement at the prospect of being his neighbor.

As your friend processes the news, she recalls a conversation you both had in the past about a boy you met at a party. "Wait a minute, is this the same Kylian you were telling me about that you met at Kimpembe's party?" she asks. You nod your head, even though she can't see you. "Yup," you respond with a pronounced 'P', "that's him."

You can't help but reminisce about that night when you first met Kylian. You two had hit it off immediately, exchanging witty banter and flirty glances throughout the evening. You were undoubtedly going to see him at home once more and have a little fun. However, your plans were interrupted when a friend of yours got too drunk, and you had to leave to take care of her. You barely even had a chance to exchange numbers with Kylian, and the entire evening you were mildly annoyed with your friend Faith because she essentially "cock-blocked" you.

But now, fate has brought you two together once again, and this time, you don't have to worry about anyone ruining it. 

Your best friend tells you over the phone, making you chuckle, "You two were literally eye-fucking eachother that night." “Do you not see how hot is his? Of course I was!,” you let out a small sigh, “ I don't know how to approach him again though", you say while biting your bottom lip.

"Simply say hello to Kylian! Could we fuck?"

You chuckle aloud while shaking your head, "Bye, I'm going to go shower."

"Yeah yeah whatever," your best friend chuckles over the phone, "Goodbye I love you, mwah mwah."

You reply, "Love you too," and end the call.

As you hum to yourself, you connect your phone to the Bluetooth speaker, intending to play some music while you prepare to take a shower. Your selection is "I Was Never There" by The Weeknd. As you turn to grab your clothes and head into the bathroom, movement outside the window across from yours catches your eye. It's Kylian, working out with two dumbbells, his shirtless form rippling with muscles as he does curls. You can't help but bite your bottom lip as you take in the enticing view. You watch him perform a few more curl-ups until he glances up and notices you. After a brief period of confusion when he first sees you, his eyes widen as he begins to remember who you are. You smirk at him and put the music up louder while stripping off your clothes in front of him. You fiddle with the hem of your shirt, lifting it just enough to see your lace bra, then lowering it as you start to dance sensually, caressing yourself all over.  Then, as you continue to dance, you lift your shirt and toss it off. You squeeze your breasts together, stoop a little, and shake your hands so hard that your breasts almost fall out of your bra. The way his chest rises and falls indicates that his breathing is becoming more difficult. You have his whole attention even if he is trying to exercise. You start fiddling with the hem of your sweatpants, running your hand up and down to tease him more by only momentarily exposing your lace panties to him. Continue to dance sensually by allowing your hands to rub all over you as you spin your body around. Your back is turned to him, you tilt your head to the side to maintain eye contact, and you start to slowly begin to push your sweatpants off of you in order to display your black lace underwear once again. You applaud yourself in your head for choosing to wear a matching set of undergarments today. Kylian is now letting go of his weights as he approaches the window, his eyes enamored with what is taking place in front of him. In order to make your ass jiggle, you rock your hips side to side. Then, you stand up and slap your ass. Up until the song's conclusion, you keep giving Kylian a tease show. By this time, Kylian's dumbbells were out of his hands, and he was standing a little bit closer to the window so you could see his growing boner. You spin around so that your back is facing him once more, undo your bra, and then press your arm against your chest so the bra is still covering your breast and doesn't fall off. Your other hand started to fiddle with the hem of your pants, lowering them just far enough for Kylian to see that you were bare below. As he starts to rub his bulge through his pants, Kylian licks his lips. You bit your bottom lip, letting your hand lower your bra even farther while just letting your areolas peek out.  Kylian kept watching attentively, his eyes pleading for more. However, you laugh, raise your free hand, and gesture "no" with your finger before quickly turning around and leaving the room. What's the pleasure in giving the man exactly what he wants?

Being overly horny, Kylian is surprised and agitated. He finds it unbelievable that his next-door neighbor is the same woman who left him at the club with blue balls and is now strip teasing him. As he tightened his jaw, all he could think about was you.

#Kylian mbappe #Kylian mbappe x you #kylian mbappe x y/n #kylian x you #kylian imagines #kylian fanfic #Kylian Mbappe x female reader #Kylian Mbappe imagines #kylian mbappe x you #kylian mbappe x reader #mbappe imagine #mbappe x reader #mbappe one shot #mbappe x you #mbappe fluff #kylian mbappe #mbappe icons #mbappe blurb #football fanfic #football imagine #soccer imagine #footballer x reader #female reader #soccer x reader #x reader #psg imagines #kylian x reader #kylian mbappe one shot #kylian mbappe headcanon #kylian mbappe imagine

[oxygenbefore1775]

Zeke is a light sleeper and no one can convince me otherwise

pairing: zeke x fem!reader

tags: canonverse, postcoital aftermath (so kinda nsfw) (is it though, im still a little confused)

cw: they kinda have forbidden fuck-buddy relationship here, zeke is kinda a softy here, also zeke being a light sleeper is cuz of abuse in the childhood

wc: 1,6 k

Cold wind escaping from the window brought your body to shivers, merciless bites at the flesh of your exposed forearms and thighs bringing you back from your sweet sleep. An exasperated sigh escaped your lips at unpleasant realization - you had to get up and close the shutters or else you'd freeze to death.

The fact that you were bare under the skimpy cover of blankets wasn't of any help either. From the corner of your forcefully peeled open eye, you noticed a chain of clothes thrown at the floor with no care and left there for the duration of the night - they were yours, most likely. Out of the two of you, only you were too hungry for a cock to mind the orderliness. Not that he was against this, anyway.

As you swung your legs over the edge of the bed, sitting up straight, ready to venture out into the cold of the room, his hand caught your wrist.

"Where are you running off to?" the strain in his voice took a feigned hurt as he pulled your wrist towards him in an attempt to make you fall back into the enveloping yet poor warmth of the bed, "Away from me?"

You turned your head to see him and there he was - lying on the creased soiled sheets, most of the blanket on his side yet bunched up at his hips and barely covering his toned stomach and thighs. His eyes have been on you all that time. So strange to meet his gaze without the barrier of glass lenses. Icy blue and bright, there was not a shadow of drowsiness to them as he took in your naked form. How long has he been awake?

Prying your hand away from him and standing up, you retorted with a huff, "Well, since you were the last to fall asleep and failed to close the window last night, I'm doing it in your stead right now"

The corner of his lips curled at such a toothless rebuke. As you were nearing the window, he changed his position rolling on his side to keep his unbroken gaze on you. Anticipating to capture each one of your careful movements as you trotted lightly on your tiptoes across cold floor.

Sometimes you found yourself baffled by his affection for you and its enviable consistency. Under no light did you ever not captivate him. Like a moth to a flame - it blinded him to the prospects of all possible negative implication that your relationship may and would inevitably bring. After all, in the eyes of everyone you're merely comrades. And comradery didn't exactly entail fucking each other all throughout the night till dawn.

Even now, you couldn't comprehend his lingering gaze. Your body was far from clean - littered with spit stains from his far-from-careful kisses and sticky with sweat, especially on your inner thighs where some of his seed leaked from you - yet he still looked. Consumed, even. Or perhaps it was just him reveling in the fruits of his efforts from this night that evidently by no means were in vain.

"Shame, I thought I made sure that you had no strength in you left to rise to your feet and close the window in the morning," the ice in his eyes began to melt with sun rays spilling over his face. "Not what I was hoping for. "

Your eyebrow quirked in curiosity, "In a freezing room with an open window you were not expecting me to close it," you swallowed a mischievous smile. "What were you hoping for, then?"

Zeke retorted in a blank expression, almost aloof, "You know exactly what I was hoping for."

"You're expecting too much from the likes of me, Captain Yeager," you shot back, barely holding back a grin from splitting your face and stooping to a level lower than his.

Ah, insufferable as ever, almost annoyed with your feigned lack of gumption. He'd never say the words first and neither would you.

"Why are you awake in the first place?" you asked instead of carriying on with you taunts, "and at such early hour, no less?"

Drowsiness was still weighing on you as your jaw went numb with each yawn you were desparately trying to stifle, yet he didn't seem to be affected by an abrupt stop of his sleep at all.

Zeke answered with strange poise and affection, "You were thrashing around in your sleep, I thought something might be wrong." He broke off eye contact, seemingly not interested to see your reaction as if his explanation bore little significance.

"And how long have you been awake?"

Zeke pursed his lips for a moment, clearly disgruntled with the recent turn of the conversation, "An hour for certain."

Your mind in its eternal frivolousness convieniently generated images of Zeke lying by your side, watchful over your sleep whilst neglecting his. Did he simply stare? Or put his hands on your body in a subliminal attempt to lull your uneasy mind with his touch? And did your body respond? The warm knot in your stomach traveled to the tips of your ears.

Oblivious to his annoyance, you cracked an endearing smile as you continued to stand near the window leaning on its sill, "I didn't know you were a light sleeper." with your gaze you try to meet his eyes, hopelessly averted from you, "Is it a recent development or have you been like this since childhood?"

"Since my childhood," the tone of his voice falling to never heard before depths.

Shadows grew on his cheeks and bridge of the nose as Zeke clenched his jaw and frowned. Then, he looked at you - now, without his glasses, he eyes seemed even more raw than usual.

Only now did you realize that in this mindless exchange you may have overstepped with your remarks. You hoped he's not too upset with you for your stupi curiosity. The tackiness on your inner thighs stirred your mind with new force as your eyes finally caught a glimpse of the door to the bathroom.

Still naked and very much freezing, you moved past his bed to the bathroom picking up your discarded clothes on the way, "I have a shift early in the morning so I better start getting ready." you muttered as you were closing the door, "Besides, i don't wanna stay up to late to let everybody in the internment zone see how i frequent your place."

As hot streams washed over you warming up your cold extremities, you let your mind wander in the nice sensation. You found comfort - if not twisted pleasure - in the knowledge that you may not restrict yourself in your usage of hot water since it's Zeke who would be paying the bill. For an honorary Marleyan it wouldn't be a grave expense. And strictly speaking, he also bore part of the blame for your disheveled state and would gladly fuck you to the same state all over again. The memories from previous night coiled up in you as you voiced a slight discontent at the fact that you wouldn't have time for this today anyway.

The air in the room was thick with steam and scent of cheap soap by the time you were done cleaning up. All the muscles in your body, previously tense, grew more and more relaxed after the heat treatment. Whilst standing in front of the mirror inspecting your face neck in search of any damning evidence of passionate sex, you nearly lost yourself.

So much so, that you failed to heat the sound of the door handle turning and hinges creaking. By the time you noticed Zeke, he'd already snaked his arms around your waist, beard prickling at your shoulder as he rested his chin on it.

"When does your shift start exactly?" a whisper poured into your ear.

You were thankful that he - unlike you - was already dressed, lest the laughably small space between your bodies would be too unnbearable, "In two hours but it's on the other side of the internment zone."

You shot up your eyes to the mirror. In there you could see Zeke's form towering over you yet desparate to envelope your fresh body. A low hum vibrated through your skin all the way to your heart. There's still time, you had the insolence to assume Zeke's thought process. Though it was pretty obvious that he was extremely pleased with this fact as he weighed down on you even more, his eyes closing.

A soft chuckle escaped your throat at the utter lack of personal space he's granted you, "But i still have to get ready," your mindful words failed to repell him.

As he lifted up his head, from the corner of your eye you could notice his unblinking gaze locked on your features, "Even in your sleep you're very beautiful," he said with an unwavering calmness to his voice, "So tranquil. Even the sniffles you make are adorable."

Constricted from movement in the cradle of his posessive embrace, you can do nothing but to look at him through the mirror's reflection. The most neutral expression was painted on his features, as if the words falling from his lips weren't radiating almost intoxicating level of endearment.

The curiosity got the better of you, "Was it the first time for you? Watching me?"

His hot breath fanning over the shell of your ear, you felt his lips pressing against your temple. The warmth spreading in your chest made it hard to make a single inhale.

"Every time you stay, you wake me up and i watch you till i fall asleep again," confession rolling off his lips so easily.

Suddenly you felt so overflowing with tenderness, it was making you numb. Laying your head back against your shoulder, you looked back at his eyes. Without the glasses, their gaze felt even warmer, the heat radiating on your features.

"Are you up for some coffee? I've made some in the kitchen"

#zeke my clingy baby #attack on titan #aot #shingeki no kyojin #zeke #zeke yeager #zeke jeager #zeke x reader #zeke fluff #zeke yeager x reader #zeke oneshots #aot oneshots

[pedropascallme]

im just so obsessed with dad pedro rn😓😓😓

AN: Fuck it girl dad Pedro. This genuinely made me weak in the knees. (I'm PMSing and the baby fever is insane and ???? do I need any excuses really?? For dad!Pedro??)

“Papa, hold your hands like this.” Your daughter barked orders at her father, pulling him down to her level and molding his hands into a position she could work with.

Pedro sat crisscross on the floor, your daughter across from him rummaging through a giant bag of nail polish and small stickers. It hadn't taken much convincing to get Pedro to sit for her, let her use him as a canvas, but she was far too stubborn to ever throw away any of the dry, crusty bottles of polish in the deep bag.

“What color, mija?” Pedro hummed and watched her continue to toss the small bottles over the carpet, looking for the ideal shade. She let out a triumphant huff before pulling out a bottle of purple sparkly nail polish, placing it on the floor in front of her father as if asking for approval.

“This is the one we’re using.” She nodded, before quickly reaching her small hand back out for the bottle, satisfied with Pedro’s smile at her as a form of assent.

When you had found out you were pregnant, Pedro didn’t let you do a thing on your own. He went to every doctor’s appointment with you, did all the chores you had planned for yourself—he cancelled every audition, every screentest, just to stay home with you, to rub your feet at the end of your long day of doing nothing. (“You aren’t doing nothing,” he had fussed every time you said it, “You’re growing a little baby! Inside of you!”) Pedro was gentle with you, and with her, and kind, and ever so patient; always willing to model for a fashion show, always willing to watch her school choir performances, always thrilled at the prospect of having breakfast for dinner with her. It was as if he knew from the moment you announced your pregnancy that she would be a daddy’s girl, and the love he had for you multiplied to include her immediately.

Watching them now, from the couch, going back and forth about what animals they might see at the zoo later today, your daughter occasionally reprimanding Pedro for moving, him turning to smile at you where you sat on the sofa, eyes glistening with pride at the tiny person the two of you had created, your heart swelled.

He was such a good husband. Such a good father.

“Let them dry now, papa.” Your daughter stood up, brushing her hands on her capris as if she had just finished a long day of manual labor. “Mama,” she made her way to you, both hands planted on your knees leaning into you before collapsing onto her knees and wrapping her hands around your legs, head buried in your lap, “look at what I did to papa’s nails!” She squealed and her giggle was muffled by the denim of your jeans.

“Beautiful, sweetheart. You did such a good job!” You reached down to lift her up, letting her clamber into your lap, “He’s never looked better.”

“Hey!” Pedro laughed, spreading himself out on the floor, laying his head next to the bag of nail polish.

She leaned in then to whisper to you, her small voice somehow carrying more loudly when she attempted to be sly; “Can I use your makeup to make papa pretty?” Pedro smiled up at you, anticipating your answer.

“Yes,” you quasi-whispered back, “but only the makeup in the top drawer.” It was all she needed to hear, practically leaping off of your lap and bounding to the main bedroom to root through your drawers.

“You can borrow my nail polish remover, if you’d like.” You watched Pedro get up, wiping the palms of his hands on his knees before moving to enfold you in his arms where you sat on the couch.

That’s where she got it.

“No way,” he peppered your face with kisses before dipping down to capture your lips with his own, smiling into the kiss in a show of how pleased he was with you, with your daughter, with his nails. “Want everybody at the zoo to see my new look, querida.”

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x you #hehe send me asks

[venicebitch00]

Hey! Wondering if you would write a Roy Kent x reader established relationship fic

Something angsty with a nice fluffy ending ??

Thanks! X

stay, stay, stay

roy kent x reader

a/n: apologies in advance im awful at writing angst but i loveee writing for roy <3 thank you for requesting!

Roy Kent was a grouchy old man. Or at least that’s how he saw himself. He was moody and short temped, he fucking hated talking about his feelings and could barely walk up a fucking flight of stairs. And after that fucking Man City match and Jamie fucking Tartt he wasn’t even a footballer anymore. 

You were a heaven-sent fucking angel. Or at least that’s how Roy Kent saw you. You were smart and caring and funny and so fucking gorgeous. Roy knew how lucky he got with you, he heard it all the time, from tabloids to in the locker room, even from his own sister. How did someone as sweet and sickenly fucking perfect as you end up with a jaded man like himself. 

“C’mon love I wish you would talk to me” You took a seat by your boyfriend on his cold leather couch and handed him a cup of tea just how he liked it. 

Roy only grumbled in response, to which you shot him a pointed glare back, ‘Don’t know what there is to talk about, I’m a old fucking man who fucked his knee and now can’t play fucking football anymore. That’s fucking that.” 

“No that’s not ‘that fucking that’, Roy” you set your tea down to face Roy, “This is a big fucking deal and you are allowed to be sad or upset or just fucking angry.” your voice began to raise in frustration, “I just wish-I wish you would talk to me, or someone about this, Roy” your angered turn into desperation and your glossy eyes and furrowed brows made Roy’s heart feel like it was being squeezed dry. 

“I don’t need to talk to someone” he spat. 

“Roy-” 

“God you always fucking do this. You treat people like little fucking broken toys and are just dying to fix them all, aren’t you? Well I'm not going to be one of your toys to mend back together, alright? So why don’t you just leave me the fuck alone” 

The second Roy saw your trembling lips and the pool of tears that welled up in your eyes, he immediately regretted what he had said. He didn’t even know why he said it in the first place. It wasn’t even true, he knew that. But in the moment Roy would of said anything to avoid admitting how much the prospect of retiring from the only thing he felt good was killing him. 

You stared at him blankly for a moment, stunned at what just happened. Roy, your Roy, your beautiful and loving Roy had just practically cussed you out. A simple “Fuck you, Roy” was all he heard as you grabbed your purse  and marched out of his house making sure to slam his door. 

The sound of your car starting up in his driveway was enough to snap Roy out of his trance, and immediately a feeling of disgust washed over him. “Fuck.”

You woke up the next morning with puffy eyes and a throbbing headache. A sore reminder of last night's events. After storming out of Roy’s house you contemplated calling Keeley and Rebecca and asking for an emergency girl’s night. Instead you opted for weeping in your bed and getting sloshed in the comfort of your own home. 

Since usually your Sundays consisted of lounging around the house with Roy, you didn’t have any plans for the day, you refused, however to sit around a mope in bed all day long so you sent a text to Rebecca and Keeley 

“Brunch this morning? In desperate need of a mimosa x”  

To which Keeley instantly replied

“Course babe! I can pick you up at your place around 11? xx”

“Perfect.”

Rebecca just liked your original message, which you knew was her way of agreeing. So you dragged yourself out of bed and put on your favourite sundress (which also happened to be Roy’s favourite as well, but you didn’t want to think too much about that) and started to head out the door, but before you could get your keys, the doorbell rang. Expecting it to be Keeley you scurried to the door, only to find your boyfriend looking like a sad puppy. 

“Roy” was all you could manage to say. 

“What the fuck you look beautiful” he breathed. This made you notice how truly disheveled Roy looked, which admittedly made you feel slightly better. 

Your silence pushed Roy to keep talking “Fuck listen I don’t think I’m ready to talk about football or my knee or Jamie fucking Tartt but I want you to know that I’m so fucking sorry and I was the biggest prick last night” 

“You’re right, you were” you scoffed “but I get it, you’re going through a lot of shit right now and you deserve to be a little prick sometimes. I just want you to know that you can talk to me about whatever you’re feeling, I mean come on I’ve seen you cry over the List Conquers All finale, I don’t think it can get much worse than that” you both laughed. 

“I fucking love you, you know that” Roy reached forward grabbing your waist, shutting the door behind him and attacking your neck, making you sigh into his embrace. 

“Mmm no I don’t think I do” you teased.

“Well I do. I love you.” he kissed your neck “you’re so sweet” next your jaw “and brilliant” then your temple “and so fucking sexy in that goddamn dress” he picked you up, wrapping your legs around his waist prompting a loud giggle from you. 

“Fuck what time is it?” you pulled back from his dizzying kiss. 

“Why, you’re gonna time me?” he smirked suggestively. 

You swatted his chest, “no I'm going to brunch with Keeley and Rebecca” 

“Fuck no, you can’t leave me here when you’re looking like that”

“Consider it your punishment for last night” you hopped down from Roy, already missing the feeling of his body against yours. 

“I could think of a few much more fun ways to punish me” 

“I’ll see you in a couple hours” you dismissed, trying to hide the blush behind your cheeks. 

“I’ll be waiting” and he shot you one of his dizzying and incredibly rare Roy Kent smiles leaving you with one thought. 

You just might have to cut this brunch a little shorter than expected. 

#roy kent x reader #roy kent #ted lasso #ted lasso fanfic #roy kent x you #roy kent fluff #roy kent angst

[justallihere]

GIRLIE YOU BETTER BE READY TO READ THIS ESSAY!!!!!!

I love how sentient the shadows are in this chapter. Its like they have a mind of their own and I'm here for it. Those shadows are hers now, not Xadens LMAO Mira's eye is going to twitch every time she sees them hanging around her baby sister

so satisfying we got to read how Pierce screamed to death and Xaden needed to relive that memory to keep himself in check

Vi basically kicking Mira out and admitting the room is also his??? I bet X was jumping for joy when he heard that

X is literally ready to shut down/hurt anyone who remotely upsets his wife. He has no fucks to give, doesn't care if it's her bsf, sister, or brother. anyone can be on his shit list and on the flip side, make her happy and he will do whatever that person asks lmao

SO MUCH PHYSICAL TOUCH IM CRYING

The hair conversation had my heart aching, X affirming that its V's body and its okay to be upset about the prospect of it being cut against her will!!!! (wonder if V is getting whiplash from the venin convo and how ppl took away her autonomy bc it's her body, her signet, her choices)

I can't even imagine the bickering that X and Tairn were having and how tired Sgayel must have been listening to these two

Did X's heart break when V thought she wasn't worth it and wouldn't come to save her? Liam really did keep her going and was so confident that X would save HER

She’d misunderstood him once before on this, and he couldn’t let her again

SOBBING!!!! THEY TOUCHED FOREHEADS. Honestly, that can be so much more intimate/impactful than a kiss imo

“Like. . .” He turned his head just enough so that his nose skimmed her cheek. “Everything has shifted since I met you. You are the center of my world—you’re the thing I orbit around. Of course I would come for you. I would do anything for you. You’re everything to me, Vi.”  “Don’t—“ A choked sob got caught in her throat. “Don’t say that.”  “Why? It’s the truth

“I love you, Violet Sorrengail,” he admitted. “I’m in love with you. You can’t get rid of me, in this life or any other. I’ll follow you through them all.” 

In every universe, they are soulmates. I will die on that hill!!! That thing in my chest ACHED when I read this part. I think I've re-read it at least 5 times 😭😭😭😭 He finally said I LOVE YOU TO HER. He didnt and wouldn't allow any room for misunderstanding!!!!! Its all on V now!!! and thats okay!!! X will be patient bc he loves her

Was this the chapter where he kisses her forehead and wipes her tears away 🥺 I love them so much, your honor

HE GOT TO SLIP HIS HAND UNDER HER SHIRT!!!!!! UGH MY HEART I CAN'T WITH THEM

Rhi is so snarky and I love her for it. She might be X's #1 hater (Mira is up there) and I am here for it. I hope we get to see these two bicker

WALK HIM LIKE A DOG SIS, WALK HIM LIKE A DOG

He would do whatever she asked

Xaden is so soft in this chapter and I love you for showing this side of him

He caught her as she buried her face against his shoulder. “Hi, Sloane,” he said gently. 

Everyone loves/fears Vi more than him and X is fully aware and okay with it

“Is that my entry fee?” Xaden asked dryly. “My wife?” 

I feel like everyone is going to be hovering around Vi once she is up and walking around (We all know Xaden is going to LITERALLY be her shadow)

Imogen and the one kitchen lady (forget her name) will be constantly feeding her and fretting that shes gotten too thin and needs to eat.

In summary: FOREHEAD KISSES GALORE, THE CUDDLING, X finally sleeping bc his wife is safe and home?????

you are amazing and i love this fic and you <3

I am always ready for all of your comments let’s do this

Mira has been around Xaden and Violet for two seconds and she’s over it. Like why is he looking at her baby sister that way? Why does Violet like it? Why is she defending him? Make it stop!!

Violet didn’t want anything to do with Pierce’s death, she just wanted to go home, but Xaden enjoyed it for sure

Listen Xaden doesn’t care. Has never cared. Won’t ever care. If anyone upsets Violet, their relationship to her is inconsequential, he won’t let it happen 😭

Xaden is about to learn the hard way that it’s Violet’s body and choice when she starts doing shit he doesn’t want her to do. Start praying for him

Sgaeyl having to intervene between Xaden and Tairn was NOT on her bingo card and yet here she is. Mediating fights between her mate and her rider over some tiny human she won’t even admit she likes

The forehead touch! The forehead kiss! The love confession! Xaden touching her skin directly to ground them both! I’m unwell!

Thank you ily 🩷🩷🩷

#storm in the quiet

[frogserotonin]

Please write George Karim x reader, I want BANTER and late night cooking

il y a - george karim x reader

a/n: im gonna be honest its 3:40am and i have to rewrite this entire fucking thing im losing my mind i literally have to get up in three hours shakshksysjst hope its what u wanted anon :)

warnings: unedited, kissing, ooc

The first time you’d met George Karim-smart, sarcastic, snappy, cute as hell and so far out of your league-you knew you didn’t stand a chance, falling for him almost instantly. What you didn’t know was that he was thinking almost the same thing about you.

Now, two years later, you slowly eased yourself outside from his arms and slipped out of the bed the two of you shared. You’d always had trouble sleeping, insomnia and nightmares plaguing you for the majority of your life. Normally you were content with just laying in George’s warm embrace and falling asleep to the sound of his breathing. Today, unfortunately, you had a fair amount of energy left and desperately needed to do something.

You checked your boyfriend to see if he was sleeping and a wide smile found its way stretching across your face at the sight of George sleeping deeply. It never ceased to amaze you that he chose you of all people, sure you were great, but he was idyllic.

You quietly exited the bedroom and made your way to the kitchen, everything in full focus to you. The brush of your oversized shirt on your thighs, the cold floorboards quiet creaking, the faint buzz from outside. The kitchen came into your view and you sped up a little bit, giddy at the prospect of baking.

As you gathered the ingredients you hummed to yourself and danced a bit around the kitchen, enjoying yourself thoroughly.

“Nice moves.”

You jumped.

“Fucking Jesus Christ, you terrified the shit out of me!” You whisper yelled at George, walking over to him and into his open eyes. He squeezes you tightly and places his chin on your head. “Why’re you up? It’s like…”

“It’s 1am,” he huffs, letting you go and pressing a kiss to your forehead. “And I’m awake right now so I can make cookies with my wonderful partner.”

“Aww, Georgie, you big sap.”

“I will leave right now.”

“Oh, come off it.” You flicked his nose and he smiled the most gorgeous smile you’d ever had the pleasure of witnessing, catching your hand and pressing his lips to it.

“C’mon let’s make these cookies so I can go back to sleep, preferably with you there as well.” He pretended to crack his fingers and started measuring out ingredients to mix. You watched as he smoothly poured in various things, mixing them with practiced ease.

“Wow, of course you have me do all the dirty work.” He shakes his head in mock disappointment. “I should’ve expected it of course but…alas.” He dramatically sighs and brings a hand to his forehead to imitate shock.

“Hey! I’m going to help, I just got a bit distracted. I can’t exactly help the fact that you’re really pretty.” You smile up at him, watching a faint red dust his cheeks. In his brief moment of weakness you swipe some stray flour off of the counter and wipe it on his chin. His jaw drops open and he retaliates with a brush on the tip of your nose.

You back and forth for a bit, before going back to preparing everything for your cookies, this time with a but more contribution from you. They were put in the oven after a bit more time.

“Hey George honey, kiss me would you?” you beamed earnestly. He leaned right in, so his nose and yours were touching, and he pecked your lips once before leaning back. You frowned at him and he smugly grinned back.

Quick as light, you grabbed his chin and pulled him in for a longer kiss, arms finding themselves hugging his neck as he kissed you back. George’s own arms were wrapped around your torso, feeding into the warmth blossoming in your chest. You kissed him until your lungs felt as if they’d stop working, pulling away from him and leaning your forehead on his. The both of you stood there, in that kitchen, with your foreheads pressed to one another’s, until George jumped and grabbed for a towel.

“The fucking cookies!” He lunged for the oven, opening it to see that the cookies were miraculously not burnt. He pulled the tray out and placed it down. “Now, who’s the distracting one?”

“Still you darling.” You laughed and if he kept smiling at you like that you would explode into a million tiny pieces. “God, I love you so much. Have I told you that before? Because I do, love you that is.”

“I love you too, but you’re not going to try one now, they’re still cooling down.”

“Worth a try!”

#george karim x reader #george karim #george cubbins #lockwood and co #mars's fanfiction stuffs ✨

[bullet-prooflove]

Grief!Series Part One: There - Bishop Losa x Reader

Tagging: @witches-unruly-heart @anime-weeb-4-life @keyweegirlie @danzer8705 @im-just-a-mississippi-girl @the-wandering-lunatic @alwaysachorusgirl @beardedbarba @multifandomloversworld @est1887 @genius2050 @mortal--soul @buddinglinguist @spookyboogyuniverse @kishie8 @saltyunicorn079 @nessamc @thebaileybugle @spaghettificationandpretzels @nu1freakshow @lyly00 @oureternalbond @beccabarba @legally-a-bastard @trublu2u

You aren’t at the community centre when Bishop turns up to work on the children’s library and that surprises him. It’s painting day and they need to get a couple of coats of white on the walls before Creeper can start drawing up the forest motif that the two of you have been working on together. It’s a massive room so he’s recruited a couple of the guys to help as well as the Prospects. It shouldn’t take too long to turn around.

“She out sick or something?” He asks Riz as he watches Bottles and Nestor open the windows in order to air the room out while they paint.

Riz shakes his head, his mouth setting in a grim line before he sighs.

“They found her sister last night; they’ve asked her to go and identify the body this morning.” Riz tells him.

It feels like a blow to the chest because he didn’t even realise you had a sister. He thinks over the conversations you’ve had over the past few months, searching for clues and it occurs to him you have never once mentioned your family. He wonders how he didn’t notice that. He tasks Riz with overseeing the paint job before getting back on his bike.

He’s dropped you off a couple of times, so he knows where you live. He’s even walked you to the door. As much as he wants to kiss you, he’s always a gentleman. He can’t stand the idea of fucking this up, he values you and the place you hold in his life too much. When he raps on your door, he doesn’t expect you to answer, it’s just past nine and he think you’re probably on route to mortuary. You’re punctual like that. He has the full intention of waiting but then he hears the shifting of locks.

When you open the door, he isn’t sure what to expect. He knows grief, his own and other people’s, he’s seen where it leads and how it presents. You stand before him in one of your blazers, it’s the pretty sage green one that reminds him of spring. You’re dressed neatly, in a black v-neck, jeans and ballet flats. The usual shit that you wear in your day to day but your face...

He has never seen something so heart-breaking. Your eyes are bloodshot and red rimmed, your pallor ruddy. Your gaze comes to rest on him, and you sigh.

“Obispo, it’s not really a good time…”

You don’t get the words out because already his arms are wrapping around you and he’s drawing you into the shelter of his chest. His palm comes to rest on the nape of your neck, thumb caressing the hollow behind your ear as you bury your face into his kutte, inhaling the scent of leather, intermingled with rich undertones of honey, tobacco, and lightly spiced bourbon. He hasn’t had a drink in weeks, but the warm smoky aroma still clings to his skin.

“I can’t do it.” You whisper as his fingertips trail through your hair. “I can’t seem to make myself leave, because if I do it means that she’s really gone and…”

You choke because that feeling, the intense burden of grief it rises up in your chest stifling your words. The noise you make sounds violent and animalistic, you can’t seem to stop the sensation as it pours out of your thorax and into the confines of Bishop’s chest.

Bishop closes his eyes as he presses his lips to the top of your head. He knows this feeling, the helplessness, the inadequacy, the wavering. He’s endured it so many times in the past eight years, it feels like an old friend.

“I’ll go with you.” He promises as he cradles you close. “You don’t have to do this alone.”

Love Bishop? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

#bishop losa x reader #bishop mayans #bishop losa #bishop losa x you #obispo losa #obispo losa x reader

[youvebeenlivingfictional]

Stupider Tattoos

Part One of If You Can't Take the Heat

Masterlist | The Original

Pairing: Carmen ‘Carmy’ Berzatto x Reader

Rating: M (though it may have explicit chapters in the future)

Notes: Not beta-read. Chapters are more loosely connected than solidly structured.

Summary: You close out of the app, tossing the phone onto the opposite couch cushion with a huffed scoff. This is just futile. You’re quitting dating apps tomorrow.

It’s an off-handed right swipe, but when your profile pictures shift beside one another, you take a better look at the guy. You hadn’t actually read his bio, you’d just thought he was kinda cute. Now, though, you click on the profile, and you realize that it’s probably a fake—

im a fuckin knowitall jackoff that thinks cooking is better than sex i smell like onion and all of my tattoos are fuckin stupid

You snort. Amazing. Whoever’s running this, either as a joke or to piss someone off, knows what the hell they’re doing. You swipe through a few pictures. His tattoos aren’t that bad…Sure you have questions about a couple of them, but you’ve seen stupider tattoos.

You hesitate before you open the chat and type exactly that:

I’ve seen stupider tattoos.

And you leave it at that. You expect it to be left at that, especially if it's a joke account. But then you get—

did richie put you up to this? And then, you can drop it if he did

Your brow furrows at the question. You tap the chat open and reply: I have no idea who that is, dude

yeah ok

You scoff, shaking your head.

if you don’t wanna talk just unmatch

A solid ten minutes goes by. Then—

you really don’t know who richie is?

how do i know this isn’t richie

You don’t have anything but my word.

least you type better than he does

I’m swooning.

if you’re not trying to fuck with me why’d you swipe on me

??? You’re cute, dude

thanks

sure

you are too

I’m swooning again

alright

…okay. good talk

You close out of the app, tossing it onto the opposite couch cushion with a huffed scoff. This is just futile. You’re quitting dating apps tomorrow.

--

You wake up to a new message—one that you don’t anticipate, and that, based on your interaction the day before, confuses the shit out of you:

what’s the best meal youve ever eaten

You have to think about it—really think about it. All of the answers that come to mind sound pretty fucking lame. Your Papa’s gumbo? Your mom’s potato salad?—That’s technically not a meal, it’s a component. 

Tough question, You answer. Then, I don’t know

no idea?

Nope

youre definitely not richie

he would’ve told you to say spaghetti or balls, some shit

Oh, still on that, huh?

i gotta vet you, right?

Do you?

isn’t that what dating is? vetting people? to be part of, like….your life or whatever?

Sounds like you haven’t dated much, dude

how long are you gonna call me dude?

Til you stop acting like a shitdick

…

kay

So?

What?

best meal you ever had

I told you, I don’t know.

i’m not buying it. everyone has one

Well what’s yours?

i could make it for you

It’s your own food? Full of yourself much? Is that why you smell like onion all the time?

what?

Read your bio

fuck

i don’t

i mean, a little

sometimes

so?

You have to think about it for a moment. The conversation's certainly progressing in a different way than you'd anticipated yesterday. Hell, after that, you hadn't expected to hear from him again at all. But this conversation hasn't been completely unpleasant, and unlike 96% of the people you talk to, he's actually trying to make a plan to meet you.

Yeah, okay.

But only if we can do a video call first so that I know that you're the one in the pictures and that you’re not a murderer.

why would i murder you

I’m just vetting you, buddy.

jesus

fine

now?

Your heart leaps into your throat at the prospect, and you hurriedly get out of bed, half-running to your bathroom. You realize as you go that the nerves are probably unwarranted—if you gave the guy another time, he’d probably be cool about it. But as you hurriedly splash some cool water on your face to wake yourself up, you sort of feel like it’s now or never. You glance at the phone as you fix your hair to make it presentable, checking for a new message. Nothing. You finally type ‘Sure’ as you head down the hall toward your kitchen. 

A moment later, your phone is buzzing with an in-app video call. You take a deep breath to quell your swirling nerves before you hit the answer button. 

You see a neck first. Then a cigarette bobs into view—and a voice mutters, “Shit, hang on.”

“...What am I looking at?” 

“I’m lighting up, I didn’t think you’d answer that fast.” 

You arch a brow, setting the phone on top of your breadbox as you begin to make coffee. Your eyes dart toward the phone, doing a double-take as the man’s face comes properly into view. The camera hold is a little shaky at first, but as he adjusts his grip, you get a better look at him. He’s definitely the guy in the pictures, that’s one box checked. 

“Where are you?” You ask, eyeing the bland wall behind him. 

“Uh…The alley behind my job.” 

“You’re not really ticking the non-murderer boxes.” 

“Where are you?” 

“My kitchen. Making coffee. Are you already at work?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, I, uh—I work in a sandwich shop.” 

“Explains the onion thing.” 

He huffs, nodding as he draws on his cigarette. 

“Prepping for lunch?” You press. 

“Uh-huh.”

“You like it?” 

“Sometimes.” 

You glance over at the phone, arching a curious brow. 

“So is your name really Carmy?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, it’s short for Carmen.” 

“Ah. So who’s Richie?” 

He puffs out another long drag, eyes rolling to look at the sky. “He’s my cousin. I mean—he’s not my cousin, he’s like, a family…”

“Friend?” 

“—Nuisance.” 

You chuckle softly, tucking the coffee-filled filter into the machine’s basket. 

“You at home?” He asks. 

“Uh-huh. I just woke up.”

“Must be nice.” 

You slide your eyes toward the video. “You’re the one, presumably, that chose the exciting world of food service. That means early mornings and late nights.” 

“You work in a restaurant before?” 

“Just waitressing. And I bartend now.” 

“That’s not nothin’.” 

The unexpected validation makes you smile, and you nod a touch. 

“That’s true,” You concede, “But things are different on the other side of the window.” 

“Where’d you waitress? Here in Chicago?” 

“Uh-huh. At a hole-in-the-wall diner called Benson’s.” 

“On the South Side?” 

“Uh-huh. Menu couldn’t decide if it wanted to be typical American food or pub fare.” 

“Some overlap there.” 

“Yeah, but the food’s gotta be good for that to be pulled off.” 

“Fair point. Best thing on the menu?” 

“Mm…The meatloaf, if the right person was making it.” 

“Worst?” 

“The Shepherd’s Pie, oh my god. It was like glue. Glue with rock-hard pieces of vegetables—on cardboard. Swear to god, you could hold that thing upside down like a meringue and it would just hang there. What about you guys, best and worst.” 

“I can make you the best if you come here.” 

“To the restaurant?” 

“Yeah. Could have the place to ourselves after closing. I wouldn’t kill you here, obviously.” 

“Not obviously,” You scoff a laugh. “Kitchens have a lot of knives. You could stab me and put me in the walk-in.” 

“I value both my knives and my walk-in way too much to do that to you.” 

You can’t help but grin at the bite in the man’s conversation. 

“Alright,” You nod. “When?” 

“Tonight?” 

“I get off of work at, like, four in the morning, so.” “A little late.” 

“Uh-huh, a little. I’m off tomorrow night, though.” 

“Tomorrow, then.” 

“‘Kay. Where should I meet you?”

Tag list: @bobawithpomegranate ; @brandyllyn ; @artemiseamoon ; @amneris21 ; @thinemineours ; @backoff-imreading ; @quietpainter ; @milf-trinity​ ; @distinguishedfilipina ; @peoniarose​

#Carmy Berzatto x Reader #Carmy Berzatto x You #Carmy Berzatto/Reader #Carmy Berzatto/You #Carmy Berzatto fic #If You Can't Take the Heat #Stupider Tattoos

[girlbossblackbeard]

s2 brain thoughts: the squeakuel (ep 2)

as a reminder, if u see me posting any of these points as their own posts mind ur business:

-i'm sending my hospital bills to david jenkins for weaponizing thef cuking "you wear fine things well" scene WITHOUT ANY KIND OF WARNING i literally almost choked to death from shock

-hey so what the whole actual fuck is up with transitioning directly from the very painful "you wear fine things well" scene which, as we've already established, has REAL HUMAN CASUALTIES DUE TO THIS USE-CASE, into the "run from me darling" lyric overlayed on top of the god damn shot of ed pAINTING THE BRIDE CAKE TOPPER TO LOOK LIKE HIM AND BASICALLY PLAYING OUT HIS FANTASY OF MARRYING STEDE. david jenkins you have committed crimes

-also!!!!!!!!!! that cake topper has kohl smudged all over it so you KNOW our boy ed has been caressing it against his cheek and sighing longingly

-i know we've all talked about how insane the "ed plays with the wedding cake toppers pretending they're him and stede" scene is but i don't think we've really comprehended how GENUINELY INSANE it is like??? edward teach, blackbeard, the kraken, the scourge of the seven seas, the most fearsome pirate the caribbean has ever known that has recently been on a non-stop slaughtering spree, painted a bride wedding cake topper to look like himself which he then scoots next to a wedding cake topper that looks like stede so he can imagine that he's marrying him. this man carefully rubbed kohl on a cake topper to give it darker skin and darker hair and a BEARD. to make it look more like himself. so he could then. put it next to a cake topper that looked like stede. and pretend. they were getting married. i've written that 3 times now and my brain STILL refuses to fully process those sentences.

-i said it in my first brain thoughts post for ep 1 and i'll say it again: every time im reminded that ed has been crying NON-STOP. EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. for MONTHS. over stede. my wall gains another hole

-the way ed is so delirious in his sadness as he pushes the cake toppers out the window. i don't even have any thoughts on that i feel like all i can do is just note it and let y'all deal with the rest

>>actually I lied, he literally watches them sink into the sea after he pushes them out the window that's so fucked up whomever made that decision to make him do that is so fucked up

-"the sea is restorative isn't it" "YYYYEEESSS QUEEN!!!!!!!!!! I'VE ALWAYS SAID SO!!!!!!!!!!!!" "ohh that guy knows" IS THE MOST UNDERRATED EXCHANGE IN THE ENTIRE SERIES IT LITERALLY HAD ME SHAKING WITH LAUGHTER

-would looooooooooooooove to know what went through stede's head as soon as roach mentioned "some place called China??" like did he immediately think of the kiss or getting sent to the naval academy or the kiss or ed's excitement at the prospect of running away together or the kiss or getting kidnapped by chauncey or the kiss or watching chauncey shoot himself in the dome or the kiss or his flop behavior of running back to his family that doesn't even want him or the kiss or

-the crew of the red flag being so immediately kind and welcoming to stede and his crew <3

-i genuinely cannot wait to watch buttons fully immerse himself in the red flag traditions like he was made to be on that crew

-"how should I put this, your energy is..." can't believe they got hatecrimed like that

-RAT BOY

-HE'S HERE

-OUR BOY IS HERE

-fun fact: i recorded my live reaction to episodes 1 - 3 and posted the clip of my friends and i reacting to lucius coming back because we were quite literally jumping for joy and crying over the reunion and THE illustrious Nathan Foad himself told me it was literally the cutest thing he's ever seen (his words, not mine!!) so we're basically best friends forever now and the rest of my life will be spent chasing the high of the happiness i felt during that interaction

-i am also crying once again over his reappearance and i think that's just gonna happen every time i watch this scene :')

-roach's shocked face when lucius appears is something that can actually be so personal

-the way they all dogpile on top of him because they're so happy to see him bitch what the FCUK

-also stede's STUPID LITTLE "huh!" LIKE??????????? THAT WAS YOUR SCRIBE AND RELATIONSHIP GURU YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER WHERE IS THE ENERGY AND EXCITEMENT AT KNOWING HE ISN'T FUCKING DEAD??????????????

-"i love it" *BIG SMOOCH* "i love all of it" *BIGGER SMOOCH* oh so they're trying to kill me by smothering me in the syrupy sweetness of their love. okay

-okay sorry but lucius's absolutely microscopic furrowing of his brow right before black pete kisses him again. for a split second he had a slight look of sadness which lines up with the very real trauma he's endured and how even in extremely happy moments they can be tinged with sadness - maybe a sadness for the past and the way things could've been if he hadn't been pushed off the boat - and all i can say is nathan foad. ur big powerful acting mind

-we gotta talk about lucius choosing not to reveal that ed had pushed him off the ship in front of the whole crew. i'm still trying to figure out if that was him trying to spare stede's feelings (unlikely considering he lets it all out later), spare black pete's feelings (possible, since he knows black pete idolizes blackbeard), prevent himself from having to relive that trauma in front of his friends when he's not prepared to confront those memories, or a combination of all of the above

-"i fell. off the ship." "that doesn't sound like you. you have impeccable balance, babe" i literally love black pete so much i may legally have to change my name to lucius spriggs

-"toouwelss? what is this? are these jobs?" stede i love you so very much to the moon and back but for the love of god you gotta shut it my guy

-I AM LITERALLY SO EXCITED FOR THE BUTTONS SEA WITCH STORY ARC LIKE IT MAY ACTUALLY BE ON PAR WITH MY EXCITEMENT TO SEE ED AND STEDE PROPERLY REUNITE AND OPENLY LOVE EACH OTHER AGAIN

-ed just. washing the door handle. i dont have any other thoughts

-GODDDDDDD HE'S SERVING SOOOOOO MUCH GENDER WITH HIS LIL HAIR BUN AND MOSTLY CLEANED UP WAR PAINT AND DANGLY EARRINGS AKEFJAPWHFA OPERGJAER

-the way frenchie looks genuinely happy for ed when he says he thinks he got all the poison out of his system and it's a new day :((

-idk much about piracy but i really don't think there's a rule about the new first mate traditionally having to kill the old first mate, i think ed just made that up so someone else would have to kill izzy instead of him. despite everything, despite how low he's sunken into the very dark parts of his mind due to the heartbreak, ed still can't bring himself to deal the killing blow

-"i expect great things from you" might be one of the more chilling lines in that interaction because for THE blackbeard to have not just any expectations from you, but GREAT expectations? that's not a compliment, that's a threat. measure up to what blackbeard thinks you should be or else

-can't comment on the amputation scene too yucky sorry

-stede trying to triangulate ed's coordinates based off of his string of crimes on a map HE drew is me trying to triangulate where tf this season is going based off of buckwild theories i've made up and used as the foundation for even more buckwild theories

-yeah idk what the mushy ass lyrics stede wrote on that map mean but i know they're frighteningly homosexual

-"FUCK YOU. that's how i am" I am SO glad lucius gets to be openly bitchy towards stede it feels like a cathartic release for me personally

-ed's fuckin "heyyyy" to frenchie in the kitchen is both hilarious and unbelievably unsettling

-absolutely obsessed with the writers for once again showing just how scarily observant and intelligent ed is when he calls frenchie out for using his right hand to mime killing izzy even though he's actually left handed

-i really admire how david chose to use a low camera angle that looks up at ed as he reveals to frenchie that he's well aware he hasn't killed izzy yet because taika's performance was already unsettling enough but that specific angle adds so much to his overall menacing presence in that scene

-joel fry's performance in the kitchen scene with ed literally makes me want to bite something he's so good at acting quietly terrified

-this is almost certainly an unpopular opinion but i really would've loved to see more buildup to jim and archie kissing. i just feel like we know NOTHING about her let alone her relationship with jim prior to the two days we've seen them interacting and i feel like that kiss would've felt like a much more satisfying payoff if we had seen more interactions between them before they got to that point. i would've taken delaying that kiss by a few episodes if it meant feeling fully invested in it once it did happen, but i also know the show already has so much material to get through (which is why we should've gotten 10 eps but i digress)

-"hey no one told me this room existed" is giving "i didn't even realize there was piracy happening"

-"take the fuckin leg" is such a perfect line delivery

-love the foreshadowing of olu explaining how the little ships on the war table were all over the place and "some of them were over land"

-roach waxing poetic about the noodles is so relatable

-"jesus christ stede keep your pants on" hands down one of the funniest fucking lucius moments of all time

-sorry but we gotta give a shout out to lucius modifying the chinese fleet uniform so it's sleeveless. the edges are cleanly done so either he was put on tailoring duty at some point and picked it up there or someone on the ship wanted to enable the slayage

-there's something to be said about the fact that the only other man who has lasted being on board the red flag ship is another member of the revenge who was picked up and welcomed into the fold well before stede and the rest of the crew wound up there. something about how stede attracts and retains other people who he can tell are gentle at heart, even if they're putting up a tough front. something about how lucius had bounced from ship to ship until he finally wound up on Zheng Yi Sao's ship where he was allowed to be himself

-"ya don't know............if ya picked up....smokin....." nathaniel buttons my beloved

-OOOOF stede's guilty face after lucius talks about how he must've picked up smoking somewhere. after the crushing guilt he already feels about the ed situation this definitely would've weighed extremely heavy on him

-MY SPICY LIL RAT BOY IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME

-"what the hell is going on in towels" wee john my beloved

-look i know izzy is on the brink of death but he genuinely looks kinda beautiful before ed wakes him up from his shock induced coma and i won't apologize for that

-"my leg" izzy is so fred rechid coded

-"it's up in leg heaven now" i need to know if ed said that as a way of metaphorically digging the knife into izzy and getting back at him for trying to force ed to send stede to doggy heaven in season 1

-i dont have the emotional capacity to dive into the ed and izzy shooting scene rn but just know it destroyed me on a metaphysical level

-"too scared to do it yourself" no because unfortunately now im thinking about ed thinking through taking his own life but coming to the realization that he can't do it. whether it's because of childhood christianity trauma and thinking he'll be sent to hell for doing so or because he knows he can't follow through with it himself if there's still a tiny shred of hope that he'll reunite with stede and everything will be okay again, he always has to outsource the big job

-also, very interesting choice to have almost jovial classical music playing in the background of the ed/izzy scene. it definitely undercut a lot of the tension compared to how supremely uncomfortable and anxiety-inducing the scene would've been if it were dead silent behind the dialogue

-"i loved you...best i could"

-"i've got an ex-wife, two messed up kids probably" LMAO stede acknowledging he would have no way of knowing how fucked up his kids are because of him

-"sounds like you're quite the fuck-up pal" "yeah, i am! and im alone! talk to pete. don't be like me" ohhhhh my god stede is in just as much agony as ed is over this breakup he's just been using his polite society social skills of saving face and never showing how truly devastated you are to others to cover up how supremely messed up he is over all of it. he is BEGGING lucius to talk to pete and NOT make the same mistakes he did because maybe if he can prevent lucius from bottling it up and actually deal with this in a healthy way he can make up for a fraction of all the hurt he's caused not only ed but lucius as well. maybe if he can get lucius to talk to pete he can absolve himself of some of the soul-crushing guilt he feels over how his actions have irreparably damaged the people he cares about the most. maybe if lucius and pete are able to work through this trauma and still come out the other side loving each other just as much or even more than they did before, he can believe that there's still hope for him and ed.

-ed choosing to put on the cravat for what he believes is going to be his last action on earth before dying because he's resigned himself to his fate but is still scared shitless by it and wants that modicum of comfort that stede will always be able to provide him no matter how badly he hurt ed is giving me the urge to find the nearest cast iron skillet and loony toons my skull

-"some people are just broken no matter what you do" noooo why do i feel like lucius was talking about himself when he said that to stede about ed ://

-oof i know they were an unnamed character but fang tried to save someone who went overboard during the storm and wasn't able to :(

-GGGOOOODDDDDDD izzy looks so fucking hot and badass all soaking wet and leaning up against the rigging after shooting ed jesus christ

-"finally" ed was so relieved to have his pain finally end. even after his journey of self discovery in the next episode im really curious how he's going to deal with having to confront the pain he thought he escaped in addition to the pain he inflicted on others while failing to cope with that pain and stopping at nothing, including nearly killing the rest of the crew, to end it

#ofmd #our flag means death #blackbonnet #gentlebeard #edward teach #ofmd s2 #stede bonnet #ofmd s2 spoilers #lucius spriggs