#and i haven’t even started buying things for the holiday so everything is going to be late

[fourthapprentice]

my coworkers can tell how stressed out i’ve been lately but i don’t even know what i can do to alleviate it

#i’m overwhelmed by life but i can’t take a break #i have a big work project i’m behind on and i’m still sick but i need to finish it #i only work 20 hours a week bc that’s all i can manage but bc of that i hardly have any sick time #i haven’t been able to draw or do anything for leisure bc i’ve been so out of it from being sick #i wanted to do a ych for the holiday season to get money for presents but it’s halfway through the month so #and i haven’t even started buying things for the holiday so everything is going to be late #i STILL don’t have a therapist in spite of trying to get one for over a year now #so all i can do is vent in the tags of a tumblr post and hope it counts #go away fern #i hate living in a city. there’s too many people. there’s not enough services #i hate the united states #negative #i miss my grandma. i haven’t seen any of my family in over a year and a half and it’s eating at me #i hate being poor. i hate that my family is poor so i never get to see them.

[the-boy-meets-evil]

all i want for christmas - xmh (the8)

(where you want minghao for secret santa so you can prove he's not really that hard to buy something for.)

pairing: minghao (the8) x gn!reader genre: friends to lovers | fluff rating: sfw (but i still don't want minors interacting) word count: ~1.8k warnings: none, really. this is just fluff and a secret santa exchange. no pronouns used for reader.

a/n: this is for @k-vanity's 25 tips for surviving the holidays. day 14 - secret santa 💕 i'm also counting this as a drabble.

“Are you sure you want to trade for him?” Mingyu asks, eyeing you suspiciously.

“For the last time, yes,” you huff out. 

Are you actually sure? No. But, this plan has to work. Every year you and your whole friend group draw names for Secret Santa. This year, you were really hoping to get Minghao. For a lot of reasons you’re not trying to share with Mingyu. Thankfully, he’s terrible at keeping secrets from you and had instantly whined about getting the hardest friend. He’s relieved you want to trade, even if he’s also a little suspicious. Not suspicious enough to hold onto the most difficult person to buy for, though. 

“Your funeral,” he says with a shrug. “Who’d you have again?” 

“Seulgi,” you remind him.

“Oh that’s so easy. She leaves notes about what she wants everywhere,” he says, satisfaction plain on his face. 

“So does Minghao, if you know where to look,” you add, keeping it a little vague.

“If you so say,” he says.

Mingyu’s not suspicious enough to look a gift horse in the mouth. Literally. Minghao is famous in your friend group for being difficult to buy presents for. Famous for not even pretending to like a present. You wonder how many presents he’s taken back in exchange for something that he wants more. Which does make the whole thing a little more daunting, especially because you’re not supposed to spend over a certain amount. That’s the whole premise of doing a Secret Santa with your friends. It’s so that you don’t have to go broke buying presents because you have a lot of friends. Of course, you’re all older now than when you started as broke university students. Still, it’s nice to hold onto the tradition. 

Now that you’ve switched, you’re nervous. Everything in your plan got you to the point of switching (and kind of how to pull off the perfect gift within your budget). You haven’t considered what he’ll say or what you’re going to say to him. Or if you’re even going to admit what you went through to make sure you had him in the exchange. You know you should just rip the band-aid off. Easier said than done, though.

The reality is that you want to be the one to give Minghao a present for a lot of reasons. You want to be able to get him something he’ll actually like. To show him that you listen to him and you know him. To show him that he’s not actually that bad to buy for, because you can tell it gets to him sometimes. That he thinks he’s just difficult, which he definitely is, but there’s more to him than that. There’s also the biggest reason you wanted to pull his name. That you have a giant crush on him. One you’re shocked he hasn’t picked up on and just as shocked other friends haven’t seemed to pick up on, either. Well, except for Seulgi. Then again, she never misses a beat. It’s useful that she knows, too, since you’re planning to ask her for help in securing the perfect gift. 

(Seulgi comes through, like the actual best friend in the world, with a killer discount on a beautiful designer scarf. Minghao hasn’t eyed that exact one, but you think you know him well enough to know that it’s still something he’ll like. It fits seamlessly into his style and it’s the kind of thing you can easily see him buying for himself. True to her word and the plan, Seulgi set aside several pieces that were returned because the brand had really weird rules about reselling things that left the store. They take returns because of the goodwill with customers, but never resell the items even close to full price.) 

When it comes time to actually exchange gifts, you’re a little nervous again. Didn’t think it through that you do this as a group, so everyone will see what everyone else got. Including the care put into your present for Minghao and the obvious, at least to you, significance. As if sensing your nerves, Seulgi shoots you a warm smile, then directs you to take a couple breaths. 

“I get to open my present first, right?” Soonyoung calls out. He’s already looking through the presents on the table. 

“You go first every year,” Seungcheol points out. 

“Right, so it’s tradition,” Soonyoung agrees. 

“Or maybe someone else could go…” Seungcheol starts. 

“Got it!” Soonyoung calls. 

“Just let him have it,” Seulgi laughs out.

As it turns out, she had him and got him a silly tiger plush and also a ticket to go to a drive through safari experience where they had tigers. Unsurprisingly, it’s a strong start and Soonyoung is thrilled. Seulgi opens her present next and it carries on just as well. It seems that everyone likes their presents, at least so far. Though, someone makes a joke that Minghao hasn’t gotten his yet. You’re still deep in thought and worry when you finally realize that your friends are trying to get your attention. It seems like it’s your turn to go next. Still somewhat lost in thought, you find your present. It’s easier because there aren’t many left and one of them is the one you bought. 

The second you open your present, it’s all you can think about. It’s a beautifully decorated scrapbook, so carefully put together that it almost makes you want to tear up. You start flipping through the pages and it’s like walking through all your favorite memories with your closest friends. The road trips and the sporting events. Concerts and beach days. Bonfires and drunken parties. A complete catalog of your best memories, without you even having to tell whoever made it. Each page is uniquely decorated without it being overdone. As you’re flipping through each page, you notice that there’s one person in more pictures than anyone else. Minghao. Is it that obvious to whoever made this that you have feelings for him? 

“I hope you like it,” Minghao says and he actually sounds nervous.

You look up at him, surprised. “You did this?” 

“Yeah, I realized after I wrapped it that I forgot to include a card,” he admits. 

“This is honestly the best gift I’ve ever gotten, thank you,” you say sincerely.

Seungcheol breaks the moment with a laugh. “Looks like you’re up next, Hao.”

“Right, yeah,” Minghao says. He clears his throat as he stands up. 

It’s a little hard for you to figure out where to look. You’re so enamored with the present you got from Minghao that you want to keep looking through it and appreciating the little details he put in. You find yourself aimlessly running your fingers over the pages. But, you also want to know what he thinks of your present. The real reaction as he opens it. Which does win out as he sits back down with his present on his lap. He’s careful as he unwraps it, almost like he’s preparing for whatever is inside. Over the years, he’s definitely been a little better about reacting to presents. Maybe he’s worried this will be another present like that. You know watching his reaction was absolutely the right choice when his eyes go wide and his mouth opens a little in shock. His fingers run over the fabric carefully before he reaches for the card. The smile when he reads the card is so genuine that your heart melts into a puddle. Maybe it’s more than a crush.

“I don’t know how you did this and stayed under budget, but thank you,” Minghao says with more emotion than you’re expecting. 

“Hey, yeah, that’s a foul! You can’t go over our budget just to get him something he wants,” Mingyu argues. 

“It wasn’t over budget, I sold the scarf. I have the receipt still,” Seulgi says.

“That’s even worse!” Mingyu argues with a pout.

“You’re just mad that someone finally got Minghao the perfect present,” Seungcheol teases. 

“I hate it here,” Mingyu says.

The conversation turns back to the remaining presents. Nobody really seems to have another comment on the moment that passed between you and Minghao over the presents. Neither of you has ever gotten the other for Secret Santa like this and it’s gone much differently than you expected. Instead of feeling nervous, you’re feeling a little hopeful. At least if your present is anything to go off. Minghao’s never put this much effort into a present. Not that you can remember, at least. Maybe, you’re not trying to get ahead of yourself, but maybe he feels a little something more for you as well. 

You’re a pretty disengaged from the conversation, especially once everyone finishes opening their presents and things turn to what movie to watch. Instead, you head into the kitchen to get someone to drink, missing the way Minghao’s eyes follow your movement. A little surprised when he appears in the kitchen with you.

“Thank you again,” he says quietly. It still makes you jump a bit. 

“Oh!” you gasp. “You’re welcome. I’m just glad you liked it. I know it’s kind of simple.”

“No, it’s perfect,” Minghao disagrees. “How did you manage?” 

“I told Seulgi that I had you and roughly what I wanted, so she set aside some returns. Only ones that came back immediately and clearly hadn’t been worn,” you rush out. 

Minghao’s touch on your arm is gentle, instantly calming. “I’m so thankful you got me.” 

“Me too,” you agree. “Well, I didn’t, actually. I traded with Mingyu.” 

“You did?” Minghao asks, seeming surprised but also pleased.

“Yeah, I wanted to get you something,” you say.

“I did, too,” he answers softly. “But, I was lucky enough to just draw your name.”

“Your present was amazing. I meant it, it’s one of the best I’ve ever gotten,” you whisper.

“It’s what you deserve. I know I didn’t spend much,” Minghao starts. 

“No, it’s everything. I can’t imagine how much time you must’ve put into this. I’m not sure anyone’s ever done anything so thoughtful for me,” you assure him, eyes soft on his. 

“You deserve only thoughtful things,” he tells you. 

“You, too,” is all you can say.

“Do you think, well, would it be weird if we got dinner sometime?” he asks and you can’t hide the shock. 

“Let’s go, you two!” Seungcheol calls.

“Like a date?” you ask, unable to believe what you’re hearing.

“Forget it, it’s weird,” he backtracks. When he starts to leave, you grab his arm.

“Yeah, I’d love to, but only if it’s actually a date,” you tell him. If you thought the smile over his present was big, this is infinitely bigger. 

“How about right now?” he presses.

“I don’t have anywhere else to be,” you agree. 

“Then, let’s go,” he says, hand held out for you.

And you take it. It’s one of the easiest decisions you’ve ever made. You didn’t even have to tell him that you’d been thinking of asking him the same thing. The holidays truly can be so magical.

i hope you liked it! please let me know your thoughts or give it a reblog if you enjoyed it 💕

#minghao x reader #minghao fluff #seventeen x reader #seventeen fluff #the8 x reader #the8 fluff #kvanity #kchristmas #svthub #minghao imagines #minghao scenarios #seventeen imagines #seventeen scenarios #the8 imagines #the8 scenarios #minghao fanfic #seventeen fanfic #the8 fanfic #minghao x you #the8 x you #jess: fic post

[ohforficsakelibrary]

Woodsmoke

masterlist

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Gender Neutral Reader. No physical descriptions of reader beyond having hair. Reader has a cat. Established but new-ish, implied long-distance-ish relationship.

Summary: Life has been running you ragged lately, but someone is waiting for you when you get home. For a moment, you don't have to be strong.

Trigger Warnings: Mentions of difficult family life, attending therapy, absent parents, wounded inner child, loneliness as a general theme. If I've missed anything, please do tell me.

Word Count: ~1.6K

Rating: General? Two curse words and some kissin'. The remainder of my work is 18+ / minors DNI.

A/N: I do not know about y'all but I have been going through it lately. And Frankie Morales is my comfort character. This is not along the lines of my usual writing, and for that reason, I haven't tagged anyone. But I'm sharing it on the off chance that you, like me, just need a hug. I know this time of year isn't the easiest for a lot of us, and I hope maybe this gives you a little comfort. Comfort!Frankie, if you will. Please heed the warnings and read with care.

You are worthy of love.

You don’t have time to cry.

Not right now, on this highway, snowflakes flying towards you like crystalline stars at a speed twenty miles per hour slower than the speed you’d be moving at if they weren’t.

You can’t see the lines on the road even without tears in your eyes.

One thing at a time.

Like everything lately.

Just follow the tracks of the car in front of you until it gets you home.

Home to your house that’s empty save for a grumpy tabby cat.

Most days you swear your existence hinges on his.

He’s been your thing to look forward to for the last fifteen years.

Well, and Frankie is visiting this week. 

Provided that this storm doesn’t shut the airport down.

Fuck.

It’s not that you hadn’t been doing well without him. 

It’s that you hadn’t been doing well.

Too long without a mental break. Exhaustion that seeps with the cold into your bones.

Too many things on a to-do list that you can’t bring yourself to do on the weekends because it’s too long and your own time is so short.

Maybe it’s some malefic arrangement of stars and planets, perhaps.

You haven’t even started buying holiday gifts. 

And it sends you face-first into the dread of making a trip back home.

The place that was supposed to be your home.

And dread is the correct word, even if your therapist says you're making real progress. 

See, the thing is, your therapist doesn’t have to sit in the contents of the box of shit you dug out from the corner of your brain and emptied all over the floor of your mind.

She only helps you sort through it every other Tuesday.

It was in the box for a reason.

It was easier to carry that way.

_____

When finally you pull into your driveway and step out into fresh snow, it’s the smell that hits you first.

Woodsmoke.

Someone has started up the wood stove so that you don’t go cold, but you hadn’t been expecting company. You figure it’s your best friend who has a key and a standing invitation, and you’re not necessarily opposed to them being here. 

Sharing a bottle of wine would probably do you some good.

You stomp snow from your shoes and step inside to offer your layers to the hooks on the wall of the mudroom before you catch sight of the boots in the tray as you toe yours off.

“Frankie?!”

“One sec, babe!”

Frankie.

You wrench open the door that leads through to the kitchen and catch sight of him in front of the sink where he’s draining steaming water from a pot of pasta.

He looks up at you across the kitchen and winks.

“Frankie,” you breathe and he quickly pops the pot back onto a dead burner, slinging oven mitts off a fraction of a second before you collide with his chest.

“Baby,” he whispers, locking you in with an arm around the small of your back and the other at the nape of your neck. 

He smells of woodsmoke and cedar and Frankie.

Smells like home.

“You weren’t supposed to be here for another two days,” you pull back and look up into brown eyes framed by mirth-filled creases.

“I was keeping an eye on the weather,” he urges you against him again to nuzzle into your hair, “didn’t want to wait. There’s another front coming behind this one. Took an Uber from the airport. Got in about an hour ago.”

Pilots and their forecasts.

“I’m glad you didn’t wait.”

“So am I,” he tilts your chin up and presses his lips to yours. Soft and sweet. Perfect.

“I made pasta, thought you’d be hungry when you got in.” He grins against your mouth before turning back to the stove to stir tomato sauce. “There wasn’t much in the fridge, but there’s plenty for tonight.” Frankie turns off the burner.

And it’s so new, having a man in your kitchen. 

Making you dinner.

“Yeah, I’m sorry, I haven’t had the chance to go to the store,” you rake a hand through your hair as he winds a corkscrew into a bottle of wine.

So new, having arms to fall into.

“Don't apologize, babe. We’ll go tomorrow,” he sneaks another kiss as he fills your glass, one hand absently rubbing your back as he does. “Oh, I also fed the cat,” he points to stacked tins of cat food near the fridge, “from that, hope that was okay,” he fills his own glass. “He was hungry and he was insisting on spaghetti but I figured that’s not…”

“Thank you.”

It’s not more than a trembling whisper.

Because you’re fighting back tears.

This man warmed your house and poured you wine and fed your cat and made you a meal.

Because he cares.

Someone cares.

For you.

“Oh, hey no no no, cariño, what’s wrong?” He replaces his glass on the counter and cups your face in one massive palm.

Soothing with a gentle thumb over your cheekbone.

“This is so nice,” you breathe and the tears finally blur his face. “I just—no one has ever done this for me before.” 

It leaves your mouth slowly, like you're not even sure if you can say it.

If you're allowed.

Your view is quickly replaced by the grey and red of his sweater.

“There’s nothing I’d rather do, baby.”

And it makes your chest heave with the sobs you can’t hold in any longer as you wrap your arms around his waist, sinking into the way he presses you tighter against his heart.

The wool of his jumper eager to collect all of the tears you haven’t had time to cry. 

Because time stands still here, wrapped tight in his embrace.

And Francisco isn’t afraid of your mess.

“It’s okay, baby. You’re okay.”

He doesn’t ask.

Instead, he tiptoes around the debris of that box to where you weep in the center of the chaos.

To where the child sits with hot tears streaming down their face.

And he looks straight into the heart of you with eyes as soft as the toy you clutch to your chest for comfort.

And offers himself instead.

He offers the breadth of his chest and the strong panes of his back. The vice grip of his arms and the gentle soothing of a palm.

He offers his whole self.

In the stead of the affection you were never given and so learned too well to do without.

In the stead of the wire-framed mother.

In the stead of the shell that should have been a father.

In the stead of all of the unkind words you clung to in the belief that they must be true.

For why else would they not love a child in the way that a child needs love?

For why else were you left lonely for so long?

And the back of your throat goes sore with the burn of his kindness.

Kindness that you still don’t believe you deserve.

“Put it down, baby. Let it go.”

Where Life asked you to soothe yourself.

“I’m here.”

Life offers him to you now. 

For Life, it seems, has taken pity on you.

Or perhaps It grew weary of how your grief made It ache.

“I’m here now.”

And so It proffered this apology.

One that you accept in the form of skin and muscle. Bones and blood.

A soft-hearted one with big kind eyes.

And Frankie holds you until the sobbing eases.

And thumbs the tears from your lashes.

Plush lips soften into a crooked smile.

"Are you hungry, cariño?" Whispered softly.

"Yeah," you murmur because you suppose you are.

"Can we sit by the wood stove?" He turns you towards the living room and lays a kiss at the crown of your head.

"Yeah, yeah of course."

"Good, because it's fucking freezing." And that finally pulls a laugh from your throat. "Go on," he smacks you lightly on the bum, "I'll bring you a plate."

You grab both glasses of wine and toss a few throw pillows on the floor before Frankie settles next to you with two shallow bowls heaped with pasta.

_____

When you've finished dinner, plates stacked on the coffee table, cat napping on a throw pillow near the pair of you, Frankie sits back against the sofa and pulls you to sit at his side.

"I'm sorry that I..."

"No," Frankie cuts you off and wraps an arm around your shoulders. "Don't ever apologize to me for feeling, baby."

And you stare down into the dregs of your wine.

"Promise," he prompts with a nudge of his arm.

You look up at him through tired, but grateful eyes. "I promise, Frankie."

"Good," and he kisses you slowly, all warm lips and soft moans.

He regales you with stories from his latest trip until you settle in against him, head tucked under his chin. Lulled by the rise and fall of his breath.

You let him hold you here, with one arm wrapped around your shoulders.

Safe by the gentle heat of a dying fire.

You'll be yourself again tomorrow.

But tonight you allow yourself this.

Frankie kisses into your hairline as you drift between this word and sleep. Your weight against him is soothing as he finishes the last of the wine, eyes trained on the windows beyond, tracking the path of snowflakes on their way to meet the earth again.

"Te comprendo, cariño," he murmurs, resting his cheek against your crown.

"Y creo que te amo."

#frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #frankie morales x you #frankie morales x gn!reader #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal #tw: loneliness #ohforficsake #I definitely cried while writing this #so I'm sorry if there are mistakes #this was wholly unplanned

[kitkatsudon]

So. Today has been a weird day.

Rambles below, because I’m in my feelings but that doesn’t necessarily have to be your problem.

The first thing I saw when I woke up today was that Ice Adolescence had been cancelled. The second thing piece of news I received, within a few minutes of this, was that my Grandma had passed away.

The second thing is more personal, and I haven’t come here to talk about that - I suppose more than anything it’s to give context on today’s slightly weird vibe, and why I’m feeling perhaps more nostalgic than I would be normally.

Perhaps as a distraction, I want to ramble about YOI.

Though now I’ve sat down to actually do this… where do I start?

Though my internet presence is very TKEM-focused nowadays, since its release, YOI has always been incredibly dear to me. It came out just as I had found out that my family were going to be moving across the country (and ok, in the UK that’s maybe less of a big deal than if I lived in a larger country, but I was 14, and 14 is a horrible age, so it was still a big deal to me). YOI came out in late 2016, we moved at the beginning of 2017, and I joined a much smaller school with… let’s say less choice for the people I could make friends with.

I was, technically, adopted by a friendship group, but it took a long time, some falling outs within the group, and me learning everything there ever was to know about BTS despite having no real passion for music-based fandoms for me to really feel included. The friendship group I’d left behind was much more diverse in terms of interests, and we thrived on mutual sharing and acceptance of each other’s interests. This new one was more kind of “conform or fuck you,” and I never quite managed to conform properly.

All that is to say… while I didn’t really have friends, in 2017, I had YOI and its fandom. While I was dealing with the huge changes in my life, I was comforted through it by, more than anything else, lurking around the YOI fandom. I had my first forays into posting things online using Google+, of all things (my parents didn’t let me have social media, but I could access this using my gmail), and they were drawings I had done of YOI characters, even a hand-drawn anecdote comic thing, and just… it was rudimentary, but you gotta start somewhere, right?

It became what I was known for, in my new school. It became part of me. That summer, my family went on holiday to Orlando FL to do the theme parks, and despite that having been something that I’d been begging to do for years, what I ended up being most excited about was the opportunity to go to Hot Topic and buy the YOI merch that they’d recently announced. I bought a T-shirt, a blanket, and a backpack, and although the backpack’s strap broke after a year of using it for school, I still have the T-shirt and the blanket, and they’re still special to me to this day. Back then, listening to the soundtrack on repeat, I’d decided that one day I was going to perform a dance routine to ‘In regards to love: Eros,’ and at the end of my first year of uni, that was something I was actually able to do. Was it good? Not really, I’m by no means a professional dancer, but I felt like I was paying homage to my inner… not quite child, more like my inner angsty teenager?

My whatsapp background is still YOI-themed. I still proudly display my Funko Pops and my posters in my bedroom at home. YOI is still my comfort show, and though I’m not usually one for rewatching shows, it’s still the show that I’ve rewatched the most. Even my username is a relic of my ties to the YOI fandom - though I wasn’t really using it much then, it’s something I thought up during the days when I was deepest in it, and I thought to myself “if I ever am brave enough to really start posting things online, this is the username I’ll use.” So even though the first thing I ever posted under the name KitKatsudon was the beginning of a BTS fanfiction on Quotev on all places that I was writing with a friend of mine at the time, it has its roots in YOI.

It’s sort of funny - once upon a time, I used to semi-joke that I couldn’t die before the YOI movie came out. Don’t get me wrong, my mental health was never bad enough that I had actually realistically considered not making it to Ice Ado’s release, but every time I said it, I did mean it. No matter how shitty I felt, I had to keep going, because I was going to have my bum in a seat when it eventually released in cinemas. I guess what this means now is that, unless Ice Ado is picked up by another studio, I’m just never going to die 🤷‍♀️ you’d better buckle the fuck up, mortals, because MAPPA has just granted me ultimate power.

What am I trying to say? I don’t really know. Maybe thank you, to the YOI team, for being such a positive force in my life. You gave me something comforting to hold onto while everything around me was changing, while I was starting my sexuality journey, while I didn’t have the close support of peers to help boost my mood. I don’t watch the show so often nowadays, but that’s because I save it for instances where I really need comforting. Maybe like today.

The story of Ice Adolescence may be over, at least for now, but I’ll always be grateful for what we did get.

#tw: mentions of death #nothing really major but better to be careful #kitkat’s thoughts tag #yuri on ice #it’s just rambles about what that show meant and still means to me #spoiler alert: it’s a lot #rip yoi #you deserved so much better #little kitkat who ended her GCSE English presentation thing on queerbaiting with a hopeful message about yoi paving the way for better #would be so disappointed in mappa right now

[thequeerator]

On Getting Gifts This Holiday Season

Note: paragraph summary at the end.

People are talking about how they won’t be buying anything for the holidays coming up next month. This is great, but I also know that there are those of us who come from very traditional families, and whose families would be very upset when we do not participate in the holidays in the same way that they’re used to. This could be especially bad for those of us in an unsafe environment, where not participating could reveal your political beliefs. Maybe giftgiving is one of your favorite parts of the holidays because it’s a way you can show how much you care for the people around you, but you still don’t want to buy nonessentials to stand in solidarity with Palestinian and Congolese people and all the people in the US and around the world who are being exploited to create more things for us to buy.

That’s why I’d like to suggest some alternatives, because this is when I usually do holiday shopping.

- for those of you, who are a little bit crafty, why don’t you use some of those supplies hanging around and then that you haven’t touched in years to make something for your friends and family?

- If you’re not crafty, have you ever considered baking or cooking a gift for those who matter most? For a significant other, you could make it a whole thing with a beautiful dinner date of home cooked food.

- do you have any gifts that you’ve been given that weren’t quite right for you but will be great for your cousin? There is no shame in regifting any unused gifts that you’ve received.

- There are groups like Freecycle and Barter Up (on tiktok @barterup901) as well as local groups where trade is allowed or expected. Freecycle is a website like Craigslist except everything listed is free. Barter Up is on discord and has groups by state where you can trade everything from goods to services. Some cities even have local meet ups too. I’d check on Facebook, Meetup.com, or start your own with your friends! Also, on Facebook, there are by nothing groups in many cities where people are willing to trade for things that they want or make posts about what they’re getting rid of that you don’t need to buy.

- hypothetically, if you have a green thumb and a rebellious spirit, go to a store like Lowe’s and make some clippings. This one works even better at stores with unethical practices. Use a glass jar as a pot, decorate it with what you have, and pot your clipping. Voila! Perfect gift.

- calling all disabled girls, guys, and theys! Have you got tons of wellness supplies and no idea what to do with half of them now that they’re no longer applicable to you? Gift a like new heated eye mask and a pack of essential oils to make a cute spa set. Bonus if you can make some sort of lotion or bath soak to go with it (epsom salt for the win).

- if you do need to purchase something, why don’t you donate to a mutual aid request, buy an esim for Palestinians, or donate to another cause you support in someone else’s name?

- Now, I don’t want to see people forgetting that local businesses exist where products are made locally. A lot of people have neighbors who sell eggs at the farmers market. A lot of places also have eco-friendly stores that sell local products. Search for small businesses near you, particularly those owned by marginalized people and buy some gifts from there. If someone in your life wants a book, this is actually pretty easy because even if you don’t have a local bookstore where you live, you can buy from one online and queer bookstores are a thing.

So in summary, the first priority is to use gifts that you can make, eat, trade for, or already own. When you still need to get a gift to someone, donate to an organization, you love and want to support or purchase a gift through a small local business near you that you know has ethical practices.

#thequeerator #free palestine #🍉 #merry christmas #happy hanukkah #happy holidays #gift ideas #free congo

[jmagnabo92]

S&H Bonding - The Worst Date Ever

When Cho drops hints about what she'd like to do with Harry on Valentine's Day, he reaches out to Sirius for help. Unfortunately, discussions don't matter much when Hermione's Quibbler plan throws everything out-of-whack.Warning: I am critical of Hermione and her actions here. Don't come at me.

AO3

***

Sirius laughs as Bill hands him another note from Harry after the lesson with Snape.  He already heard all about it from Harry, but Bill’s still in the dark about the mirror, thankfully.

“Was it bad?” Remus asks as Sirius opens the note.

Dear Pads,

It just occurred to me that Valentine’s Day is so much worse when you have a girlfriend.  What am I supposed to do or get her?  She keeps hinting that if I buy the right thing, it’ll go perfectly with her plans for the evening – what does that even mean?  She hinted about bubbles?

Send help.

Love, your kid, Harry

Sirius snorts.  This kid is a mess with dating and it’s hilarious.

“Care to share?” Remus asks, breaking off his focus from Bill who was sharing the way Snape had started to belittle Harry and mock him for letting him get in and see his memories of snogging Cho in various places around the castle.  Bill had stepped in, but Snape found ways to mock Harry anyway.

Sirius grins, “Harry’s girlfriend wants to have a sexual relationship with him in what I could only assume is the prefects’ bathroom based on the comment of ‘bubbles’ as a hint if he gets the date right.  Send help he says.”

Bill and Remus burst out laughing.

“You sure he’s ready for that?”  Remus asks.  “I mean, they’ve been dating for months, but he’s kind of behind…”

Sirius shrugs.  “To be honest, are we ever really ready for it?”

“No, but – but I think there’s a big difference here,” Remus counters.  “You literally just gave him the sex talk.”

“Fair point, but the twins were there, too, and they’ve definitely had sex,” Sirius retorts.

Bill frowns.  “I always assumed they knew everything.”

“I think they did,” Sirius states.  “Just wanted in on the conversation, maybe to help ease things along for Harry.  I mean, Harry was pretty quick to let them in and seemed relieved that they’d make jokes whenever he looked particularly embarrassed.”

“Ah, maybe they were trying to make up for what happened at the start of the holidays – even since they got banned from quidditch,” Bill offers.  “I know they haven’t reacted well to Harry’s defense of you over mum and dad.”

Sirius nods.  “Most people don’t understand, but Harry’s my kid and I’m his parent – your parents are nice people, they gave him jumpers and food, but it’s just not the same…”

“You don’t have to explain,” Bill offers.  “I know – I see the two of you together and it’s obvious.  Plus, you’re the one that has constantly supported him.”

Sirius smiles.  “Thank you.  It’s been hard to deal with people who state otherwise, and I appreciate the help now.”

“Good.”

“So, what are you going to tell him?” Remus questions.

“Er – I don’t know.”  Sirius frowns.  

He knows that Cho’s been leading the entire relationship, and that Harry’s definitely a bit unsure about things.  He could tell Harry that he shouldn’t do it, but his kid might just do it because Sirius tells him not to.  He could suggest that Harry’s not ready (because Sirius isn’t sure that he is), but that would just make Harry want to prove that he is ready – even when he isn’t.  

“I suppose that I could just advise him on what the bubble comment means,” Sirius shrugs.  “Ultimately, it has to be his choice and he wouldn’t be the first person to have a first time he’s not ready for.”

“True,” Bill states.  “Still, since it sounds like your first time might not have been something you were ready for – maybe you could…”

Sirius clears his throat.  “Nope, can’t do that.”

“Why not?  It’s not a big deal – obviously, he’s okay talking about sex with you…”

“Nope – nope.  Just trust me.  I can’t tell him – it would be … just awful.”

Given that Harry has no idea about Sirius’ relationship with James and the awkwardness of explaining the way they tumbled into bed that first time, Sirius absolutely could not tell Harry about his first time.

Remus is giving him a look, “Was it…?”

“Yes, and that’s exactly why I can’t tell him,” Sirius says, giving him a look.  “And given he’s the only one…”

“Damn, you’re always so lucky.  The only person you’ve been with is the love of your life,” Remus says, jealously.  

Sirius gives him a disgruntled look.  “Yeah, I’m so lucky.”

“Oh, right, sorry,” Remus grimaces and goes silent.

Bill’s frowning across from them, “Okay, one of you has to explain.”

Sirius shakes his head, but Remus says, “Just tell him – you know that he won’t judge you.”

“Oh, fine,” Sirius sighs, when he sees Bill nod.  “It’s kind of a unique situation.  See, Lily and I were as close as James and I were – so, she knew that I fancied him, even though I didn’t tell her, and she saw us a few times while we were hiding our relationship in sixth year.  In seventh, when it was clear that James did still fancy Lily, too, I – I told him that he should give it a try when she asked him out.  That he had to date her to know that it was me he wanted to be with –”

“How could she do that to you?” Bill asks, appalled.  “You said she was your friend.”

Sirius is taken aback; he hadn’t even considered what Lily had been thinking trying to get James to herself if it wasn’t for the fact that she always wanted to share him.  She’d only asked knowing that she intended to share the whole time.  

“Er – well, she – er – she always planned for what happened,” Sirius states, noting Bill’s frown.  “Which is that she knew that I’d give James my blessing to find out and if everything went well that she’d be able to tell us her master plan.”

“Master plan?”

“To share him,” Sirius states, thinking about that moment when Lily pulled them both up into the dorm and said that they needed to talk.

Sirius had been avoiding even looking in either of their directions for two weeks and had immediately told her that there was nothing to talk about.

“Don’t lie to me, Si.  We both know that you’ve been heartbroken ever since I asked James out,” Lily states, plainly.

“Not true,” Sirius chokes out.  “It’s just – I’ve had a lot going on.  Wanted to catch up on homework.”

“Please, I’m not stupid.  You’ve been my best friend for ages – I know you.  I know that you’re in love with James,” Lily states, crossing her arms as she stands in front of the door.  

Sirius coughs.  He couldn’t deny it and one glance at James says that he’s still in love with Sirius, too.

“And I know that James is in love with you, and yet, he still went out with me because you’re some sort of self-sacrificing masochist,” Lily states.

“I am not – I just – I couldn’t hold him back.  He’s fancied you for ages – and yeah, we’ve … had fun together, but if he’s happier with you – I just I want him to be happy.  That’s how this works, right?  I love him, a lot, and they say when you love someone – all you want is for them to be happy.  I love James,” Sirius states, giving him a loving look, before turning to look at Lily.  “And I want him to be happy – and if that’s not with me, if that’s with you… well, he found an amazing girl.  He’s got great taste.  You’ll take great care of him.”

Lily’s got tears in her eyes, obviously touched.  “You’re such a dunce.  Didn’t you think that there’s a reason that I’m confronting you right now?”

“Yeah, to warn me that you know about our past and –”

“No because I want to share James,” Lily states.

“What?” Sirius and James ask together.  Evidently, Sirius isn’t the only one that is being thrown for a loop here.  

“You – you want to share me?” James asks, speaking quickly.  “Like I could – have both of you?”

He looks eager at the possibility, and Sirius could admit his own eagerness.  

“Well, yeah,” Lily chuckles.  “What kind of best friend would I be if I stole your boyfriend away and didn’t consider your feelings on the matter?”

“I – well, I – you knew?” Sirius questions.

“Oh, come on, like all those times you talked him up to me and I’m meant to believe that I shouldn’t have picked up that you were mooning over him,” Lily smiles.  “I know you pretty damn well, Si.  And I know that this won’t be easy, but I also know that I really fancy James and I love you, platonically.  And I know that you love James and love me – differently, obviously.  And I – I really think James wants to make a go of it with me, but he’s totally gone on you, so…”

Sirius wipes away his tears.  “Yeah – I mean, I’m game.”  He looks at James and opens his mouth to ask him what his thoughts are when suddenly James is kissing him.  

He missed kissing James over the last two weeks, so he doesn’t hesitate to kiss him back.  

After several moments, he hears, “Guess I’ll leave you two alone now – you can have him tonight, but tomorrow, he’s mine.”

He breaks away just long enough to say, “Deal,” before refocusing on his boyfriend.  Now, his again.

“Earth to Sirius,” Remus says, waving a hand in front of his face.  

“Er – sorry,” Sirius shakes his head.  “Anyway, ‘bout two weeks of dating James and she offers to share him with me.  Something about how James and I were gone on each other, but James also fancied her – Lily and I were best friends and – and it just made sense.  I mean, if I weren’t gay, she’d probably of tried a true threesome, but I am – so sharing was the best she’d get.”

“Why – why doesn’t anyone know?” Bill questions, clearly accepting the different relationship.

“Because I’m a Black or I was … well, I never got to marry him, but I always considered myself a Potter.”  He clears his throat.  “With being in the Order, Lily as a muggleborn and me as a Black – they were targets because they were my friends.  If anyone knew about the situation – I just couldn’t take the chance.”

Sirius shakes his head, looking down at his locket.  “Not that It matters – they became the biggest targets in the war anyway.”  

He doesn’t have to finish with what happened.  Obviously, the war ended in devastation and that’s the end of their story.

“I’m sorry,” Bill states.  “I thought it was bad before, now…”  He pauses, and gets a confused look on his face, “Harry doesn’t know?”

Sirius shakes his head.  “I don’t really know how to tell him, and they aren’t here so, he doesn’t need to know, but yeah, I can’t tell him that the only person – not just our first time – that I had sex with is his father.”

“Fair,” Bill states.  “Maybe I could try talking to him.  You know, I regret my first time – I was inexperienced, I barely knew her, but I had been interested because I heard all about how great it was – so I rushed into it.”

“I’m sure teenage hormones helped,” Sirius teases.

“Oh, definitely,” Bill jokes.  “But yeah, I definitely rushed, and I wish I’d waited somewhat.  The second person that I slept with was much better.  At least I had a connection and had discovered more about myself to be comfortable.”

“Well, you do see him every week.  Maybe you could talk to him?” Sirius offers.  Obviously, Sirius’ll try to talk to Harry about gifts, and the special date since it’s also their six-months ‘anniversary’ and Valentine’s Day.

“Of course.  You going to write a note back?” Bill asks.  

“Of course.”

Dear Kid,

First things first, I might suggest that bubbles means that she likes to get clean, maybe even with you.  

Second, you don’t need help.  You’re going to be just fine.  Plan a date, make her something nice, buy her some candy and flowers, and remember that it’s also been six months on the fourteenth.  Just try and be romantic, but also be yourself.

Don’t focus on being the perfect boyfriend or whatever plans that she may or may not have, just do your best and if things happen and you’re ready for those things… then, let things fall where they may.  

Love, your Pads.  

“There – some basic advice.  Hopefully, it helps.”

“I’m sure it will.”

***

Sirius had spoken with Harry extensively about his preparations for his Valentine’s Day and hoped the day would go well for him.  Given that he knows of Cho’s after date plans, Sirius figures that Harry will be busy all day and thus, pours himself a drink since he’s alone today.

Sirius hadn’t expected to hear from Harry today, given the holiday, he quite expected that Harry would sneak off and be a normal teenager with his girlfriend, and he’d hear about how it went tomorrow, instead, just after dinner, he hears his mirror going off.

“Hey kid, thought you’d be busy today,” Sirius states, peering into the mirror uncertainly.

“Yeah, well, it must’ve been the worst date in world,” Harry states, looking miserable.

“Why?  You and Cho have been getting along splendidly.  She liked your Christmas present, and I told you about the romance and stuff… she clearly had a plan…”

“Yeah, well, apparently, Hermione had some bright idea to force me to talk to Rita Skeeter about what happened in the Graveyard.  Only she didn’t tell me that.  She just told me that it was really important, and I had to meet her at noon at the Three Broomsticks.  Wouldn’t take no for answer.”

“Oh, no, Kid,” Sirius groans.  “Didn’t she think we would’ve come up with that idea on our own if you were ready to talk about it?  And in the middle of your date, too?  A very special date that she would obviously know about?”

“Of course she didn’t.  Or she did and just didn’t care – she’s not a fan of Cho, so it’s probably the second option.  Especially given that she’s not exactly known for caring about all that.  She has an idea, and you have to agree, or she’ll badger you about it.”  Harry shakes his head, furiously.  “Apparently though, that wasn’t the worst part.  The Slytherins were determined to cause grief by seeing Cho and I together and bringing up Cedric, who we haven’t exactly talked about in a while, and I thought we were doing okay, and suddenly she wanted to talk about him…”

“And because of what happened and all the stuff with the Azkaban breakout and what not, you’re not exactly anxious to talk about that on a date,” Sirius finishes for him.  Maybe Cho isn’t as ready for next steps with Harry as she thinks.

“Exactly.  So to distract from that situation, I bring up meeting Hermione and – and I don’t even know what happened.  Next thing I know she’s talking about her and Cedric dating and then she mentioned Roger Davies asking her out and we’re at this horrid tea shop and she’s crying and then she just took off all upset.”

“Aw, kid, she was trying to make you jealous because she’s jealous of Hermione,” Sirius states.  That much he’s absolutely sure of.  Cho has been jealous of Hermione since the beginning of term, as evidence by all of the arguing, and Harry bringing up meeting her in the middle of their special date probably provoked those barely hidden jealous feelings.

“What?  Why?  She’s just my friend.  And we’ve talked about it – I mean, I’ve been with her since September…”

“She’s a girl who’s been by your side for years, and you literally told her that you would cut your date short so you could go see her,” Sirius explains.  “A very special date, I might add.”

“It wasn’t like that!”

“I know, believe me – I do.  It’s just to her, she doesn’t get it so… that’s where her mind jumped to.”

Harry sighs, “So, what do I do?”

“Get her a present, some flowers and sweets, and write her an apology note explaining what happened.  Send it with Hedwig and give her some time to accept it.”  Sirius pauses, “Your dad always used to make these glass flowers that would start as a seed and grow into her favorite flower until Saturday when it would start all over again.  Since it’s glass, it can’t die – maybe I can tell you how to do that?”

Harry smiles, “That – that would be great.”

“But before I do that – do you want to talk about what’s going on with what Hermione did?” Sirius questions.  Given Harry’s reaction to the other kids eavesdropping on Christmas Eve, it would make sense that Harry’s not exactly thrilled about Hermione trying to force him to talk – it’s like she learned nothing from Harry spending days as Snuffles to avoid talking to any of them.  

“It was fine.”

“Kid, don’t lie to me.  It can’t have been easy to deal with Skeeter, let alone answering all of her probing questions about the most traumatic event in your life.  One you barely want to talk to me about let alone anyone else.”

“I don’t know why I bother to try and downplay things to you,” Harry mutters.

“I don’t either – we both know I know you well enough to read between the lines.”  Sirius would chuckle, but this isn’t exactly the right time.

Harry sighs.  “Fine, it was awful.”

“That’s better.  Go on.”

“I was reeling from the Cho thing, and I show up – there’s Hermione with Skeeter and Luna.  Apparently, she had decided that the only way that we could get people to understand what happened last year and be on my side was for me to tell Skeeter everything and let her question me about every last detail of what happened.”

“Go on, tell me what everything.”

And he does.  Harry explains how he reiterated everything that he’d been through – naming names and giving the excruciating details of everything he’d been through.  He’d spent hours being grilled with Skeeter making jokes about how she’s really better off writing an article people want to read – ie, him having some sort of psychotic break from reality due to being in the tournament and wanting to kill for the win and then, reacting badly to being able to follow through.  

Hermione had been blackmailing Skeeter with being an Animagus, which caused her to agree to writing the story with the truth and only the truth.  It still put Harry in a position to tell everyone everything he’d been through when he didn’t want to talk about it and with zero support.  Absolutely no consideration about Harry’s feelings at all.  It makes Sirius absolutely furious.

“You know, I don’t even know how I feel about any of it – I don’t feel better.  I don’t think I even care if those who haven’t believed in me all this time believe me because I had to relive the worst night of my life – and it is the worst night because it’s replaced the moment of hearing my parents dying for me when I was a baby when I ran into the Dementors this summer.”  Harry’s angry – rightfully so.  

“I am so sorry, kid.  I wish that I could help you – do something, anything, but I can’t.”

“I know – I just … what am I going to do when people react to what I went through?  And did Hermione think about how I’m affected by this?  Or how Cho might be affected?  I – I haven’t even been able to work up the nerve to tell her and now, it’s like I’m saying I don’t care about her feelings on the situation, and she deserves better than that.”

“I agree.”

“I just – I feel devastated that my best friend thought this was an okay situation to put me in.  That she thought the greater good of everyone knowing was more important than my feelings on the matter.  I already told the DA and my friends more than once that I didn’t want to talk about it, and she goes and does this?”  Harry shakes his head.  “I thought we were friends, I thought I mattered more to her.  It just – it feels like I don’t.”

Sirius aches to be able to reassure Harry and give him a hug.  Take him away from everything, but before he could think of something that would help, he and Harry hear a knock on the door.  Harry hides the mirror in his bag, but it’s still activated, so Sirius can hear everything.

“Harry?”

“Cho, and Luna, what are you –”

“I brought Cho here,” Luna, obviously, states.  “It became very apparent to me that you had no idea what Hermione had planned, and I felt it was very unfair, so I wanted to apologize and give you the opportunity to explain to Cho what happened when I saw how upset she was.  I assumed neither of you knew.”

Harry clears his throat.  “Thank you, Luna, I had no idea.  She just told me it was important and made me promise, which I shouldn’t have done, and if I had known what it was for – I wouldn’t have.”

“What was it for?” Cho asks, icily.  Clearly still upset.

Harry takes a deep breath. “Hermione has been keeping Skeeter from writing bad articles about us due to discovering that Skeeter is a beetle Animagus, it’s how she obtains her information illegally by spying on them.”

“Blackmail?  Wow, when I thought she couldn’t sink any lower,” Cho scoffs.  “Why does that matter?”

“Because after the breakout at Azkaban, Hermione had the bright idea to make Skeeter write everything that happened honestly after the third task – and have Luna’s father publish it in the Quibbler.  She reached out to both and then this morning insisted that I meet them (well, her) at noon at the three broomsticks so I could…. Tell my story…”

Harry trails off and there’s silence for several moments.

“You mean, she blindsided you with woman who has ruined your reputation and is the reason no one believes you in the first place to force you to tell the world about one of the worst nights of your life?” Cho demands.  Obviously, Harry nods because the next second, Cho yells, “I’m going to kill her!”

Clearly taken aback, “You can’t kill her, but yes, I am angry with her.”

“Not angry enough.  She ruined our date and anniversary to force you to relive your trauma to the one person that is the reason you’ve been going through such hell this year.  Skeeter started this and – and Hermione – no, no this is not okay.”  

What follows is a clearly angry Cho storming out of the room, And Luna offering, “I thought I could set you up with a make-up date and give you the chance to approve the article…” she obviously hands him something, “let me know if you approve.  Sorry, again.”

And silence reigns.

Harry clearly shoves the prewritten articles into his bag and pulls the mirror back out.  “Er – I don’t know how much you heard, but I – er – I need to intervene.  Talk to you later?”

“Of course, later kid, good luck.”

***

Sirius would have loved to have been a student in the Gryffindor common room that evening when Neville, upon hearing what Hermione had done, had given Cho the password into the dorm allowing her to berate Hermione about the situation in front of everyone.  Of course, Hermione hadn’t taken it sitting down, meaning that there had been an all-out row smack dab in the middle of the common room.

Harry had arrived fairly quickly afterward, and so had McGonagall when another prefect felt it was their responsibility to do something but didn’t agree with Hermione enough to speak up for her.  The row had ended when McGonagall insisted the three of them accompany her to her office.

According to Harry, many students and even McGonagall had been appalled by Hermione’s lack of concern for Harry’s feelings on the matter and ambushing him with the idea despite the fact that many of them wanted to know what happened that night (and felt that Harry should tell everyone what happened, clearly not caring about his feelings, either).  Hippocrates.

Although she didn’t condone Cho’s behavior, either, she could understand where they were both coming from.  Hermione had wanted to help the greater good, while Cho had been solely focused on her boyfriend.  The end of the discussion resulted in detention for both (for causing a scene), and McGonagall reminding Harry that it is his choice to do the article, but there are pros and cons to both options and to truly consider it.  

Harry had spent the better part of the next three days debating back and forth (and not speaking to Hermione) before he admitted to Sirius, “I think I should do it, but I don’t want Hermione to feel vindicated.”

Sirius nods, “You’re worried that it will affect the public’s perception and as a result, she’ll feel that she did the right thing – that it is okay to sacrifice your feelings and to do things that greatly affect you without consulting you.”

Harry nods.  “But I – so many people have come up to me asking if those rumors were true, that I spoke to a reporter to tell all, and that they’ve all been wondering and that it would help them believe me.”

Sirius frowns, “And what have you said to these nosy gits?”

“Nothing because Cho immediately took points and the twins or Ron and Neville declared that they’re the next target of the twins’ pranks for daring to even approach me about the situation.”  Harry states, trying not to laugh.  “Seamus has literally asked every day and has been pranked every day.  I don’t think that’s helping.”

“It does make you feel a bit better, though, doesn’t it?” Sirius questions with a smile.

Harry nods.  “It does, but it also helps me feel like it’s going to help our side.  I’d really like to do anything that hurts Voldemort and given that I – you know, I already did the hard part…”

“It’s your choice.  I support you, no matter what.”

Harry smiles.  “Best Pads in the world.”

“Helps that I have world’s best kid,” Sirius grins.  

“I should go, I love you.”

“Love you, too.”

#Sirius Black #Harry James Potter #Sirius & Harry bonding #Sirius and Harry Saturday #Bill Weasley #Remus Lupin #Cho Change #Mirror Talks

[fangirl94stuff]

THE AMITY AFFLICTION: AHREN STRINGER

AHREN

'Ahren you need to stop tapping your foot because it's annoying as hell, and because we'll be home soon,' Joel moans loudly next to me probably regretting choosing to sit next to me on the flight.

I look down to see my right foot tapping away without my knowledge since I was lost in my own head and stop it, 'sorry Joel.'

Joel smirks and shakes his head, 'some people might assume you're eager to meet a partner, not a friend.'

I glare at Joel, 'Y/N and I are best friends, we tried dating when we were younger and realised we were better as friends. Everyone has a person and Y/N is my person.'

Joel throws his head back and laughs, 'thank god you're not this soppy on stage.'

I punch him in the shoulder and go back to staring out of the window. Y/N and I had been friends since birth as our parents knew each other, we told each other everything and didn't like to be away from one another for too long. Long tours were a pain, but the best feeling was coming home again.

Y/N was a teacher so was unable to travel with us, though they did try to come to every show in Australia if their timetable allowed it. However, the summer holidays were just starting and I had the best surprise for Y/N that would make our time apart worth it.

-AFTER FLIGHT-

'How do you think Y/N will react?' Dan asks, glancing over from the driver's seat.

I play with my fingers nervously in my lap, 'hopefully she'll say yes-'

'Wow Joel was right about you being whipped,' Dan interrupts me chuckling to himself, 'Y/N would go to the end of the world with you if you asked them to.'

I give him the finger, 'if you knew the answer why did you ask?'

Dan smiles widely, 'it's interesting to watch you squirm. Anyway, here we are.'

The car comes to a stop outside a small house, and I get out. My apartment was being renovated so Y/N was letting me stay in their spare bedroom. Dan doesn't even bother to help me with my bags.

'AHREN!' a familiar voice shouts loudly from the porch of the house.

Next thing I know Y/N comes all but running down the stairs and drive towards me grinning like an idiot. I brace myself for impact as they throw their arms around me and squeeze tightly.

I chuckle and hug them back, 'someone's been waiting haven't they?'

Y/N blushes a little and pulls back, 'ever since Joel messaged me that you'd landed. Hey Dan.'

'Good to see you again Y/N, It's been too long,' Dan calls back.

Y/N helps me get my bags out of the trunk and waves at Dan before dragging them up the driveway. I wave at Dan and watch him pull away before following after Y/N with the rest of my bags.

When I get inside Y/N stares between me and the bags, and I roll my eyes at what they were not so subtly getting at, 'yes I got you presents.'

Y/N fist pumps and heads down the hallway to the kitchen, 'I'll get you some water Ahren.'

I open one of the suitcases and take out some small boxes that had been tucked away to keep them from breaking. I make my way toward the kitchen with the gifts. Y/N had their back to me getting two glasses of water so I place the boxes on the kitchen counter and cleared my throat.

Y/N turns around and their eyes light up, 'you're the only person who feeds my habit Ahren, everyone else thinks I'm crazy.'

Y/N loved tea and when we travelled around the world I liked to buy them interesting flavours. They literally had a whole kitchen drawer dedicated to tea bags.

I shrug my shoulders, 'what can I say it's what best friends do for one another.'

Y/N walks over and hugs me, this time with less squeeze, 'I missed you so much Ahren, I'm happy you're back even if it's for a couple of weeks before heading out again for festivals.'

I can't keep the smile off my face, 'do you have any summer plans?'

Y/N shakes their head, 'not really, it's odd but every time I try to arrange something with friends or family they tell me they are busy.

'Well, I have something else to give you that hopefully makes your summer better.'

Y/N pulls out of the hug and tilts their head to the side watching me curiously, 'what else could you possibly have for me Ahren?'

I take my phone out of my pocket and open my emails, before opening one that had flight information for when we started festivals and hand it to Y/N.

Y/N blinks as they scan over the details, 'they are your plane tickets Ahren.'

I shake my head, 'check the names Y/N, they are our flight tickets. You're coming with us for the whole summer.'

Y/N gasps and puts the phone down on the counter staring at me with wide eyes, 'are you serious Ahren? Is that why people didn't want to make plans with me? You cheeky sod, you really are my best friend.'

I lean against the counter and pick up one of the glasses of water and smirk, 'I'm guessing your answer is yes Y/N.'

Y/N nods vigorously and playfully punches me in the shoulder, 'hell yeah, you're going to be stuck with me the whole summer Ahren.'

I was happy to be home, I was happy to see Y/N again, and we didn't have long until the festival season started and we'd be together every single day. Most people wouldn't want to be with their best friend for that long but Y/N and I never got sick of each other's company.

#band imagines #band blog #band imagine blog #imagines #the amity affliction #The amity affliction imagines #ahren stringer #Ahren stringer imagines #fanfiction blog #fanfiction #imagines blog #The amity affliction fanfiction #joel birch #taa #taa imagines #Band imagine #Band fanfiction

[fatedwithmbc]

I’m wide awake and side note, NOT HIGH. That turned into a fiasco in itself. I hadn’t taken my medical marijuana in over a month and took the same dosage I had been taking when I had a tolerance. I was high well into the next day and messed up plans with “E” and my friend.

The terrible thing was, I knew I “messed up” but was so high I couldn’t stop laughing. So, I was laughing and crying at the same time. Ugh- everyone was really cool about the change of plans (lucky for me). I’m glad and thankful of their understanding.

“E” and I went to lunch at a mid-way spot between us the next day. I was glad to still be able to see and spend time with him. All is well in that world… I think. I haven’t stayed at his place in a couple of weeks, but he’s been adamant about doing things and not just lounging at his house. We do need to go on dates- I get it. But I miss sleeping next to him. And just lounging around with him. But really I’m comfortable with him anywhere. I do also miss “R”. Who knew I’d miss a dog who wasn’t mine?

Prior to the “incident”, I did have a nice dinner with my closest friends to celebrate the holiday. We finally were able to coordinate a time and place and I was not disappointed. I even ate a turnip- which I’ve never had before having pot-roast at that restaurant.

The girls liked their gifts which filled me with happiness- I try to be thoughtful and think of things they like and will use. I find it’s horrible to get gifts you know you won’t use. I try to avoid that at all costs by considering who I’m buying for.

Sunday the family also came for New Year’s dinner and it was pleasant. I was tired and irritable though. My nephew was on the same page and had a meltdown upon departure. Sunday night, I started crying for no reason and it continued well into the evening Monday.

I got positive news that my pneumonitis is clearing up, my largest liver tumor has shrunk by at least half and some of my smaller tumors are gone. My treatment is working and I should be thrilled, but I was still crying. The crying was chalked up to hormones and menopause. I was even cleared to start work again in February, beginning with half days. My oncologist even gave me a prescription telling me to celebrate my good news (further evidence I selected the right provider).

Why doesn’t it feel good?

I think this small win pales in comparison to the fact that I need treatment for my lifetime. I’m still told it’s unlikely I’ll ever be NED (No Evidence of Disease). I’m tired of taking pills everyday, even though I did for my depression prior to my diagnosis. It just seems harder because these pills have harsher side-effects.

I’m still losing weight due to lack of appetite. I am still sleeping heaps. My hair follicles still get painful (even though I’m not losing my hair). I just am not pre-cancer me and I never will be again. That in itself is a hard pill to swallow.

I’m content to let everyone else celebrate my little victories, because for me, there’s still so much overwhelming reality to face.

I’m also very worried about starting work again, although- it’s time. I’ve sorted my shit out. I know what treatment feels like, I have come to terms with my diagnosis, and now it’s time to start my job again. Time to start my new normal.

I’m determined everything will work itself out- but I know that might take more time. Time I don’t want to use figuring it out. However, I don’t get a choice.

I just want to be fine. I even miss pre-grief Ashley. I’m just so changed. It makes me wonder how I’m able to keep people in my life when I just feel so negative. I try not to be in person- but it gets overwhelming sometimes. I guess this is one of those moments.

Reminder: A depressive moment doesn’t mean I’m depressed.

I guess I’ve sorted all my thoughts out for now. I should try to sleep.

Also, sorry if the timeline is unclear here-

Thurs- Dinner with Girls

Fri/Sat- Medical Marijuana Incident

Sun- Lunch with “E”, Family Dinner

Mon- Oncology Follow-up

#fated with mbc #confessions of a cancer patient #stage iv deserves more #metastatic breast cancer #stage iv metastatic breast cancer

[cosmal]

i really need to rant. and tumblr is the best place for it so.

i live with my cousin. we’ve been close our whole lives we’re like best friends. and living with her sucks. you know that feeling you would sometimes when you were little and your mum or whatever would come home? that’s me with her. i feel like the house isn’t tidy enough (despite majority of all messes being her) and that even if I had tidied it’s not good enough. and she makes me feel so fucking stupid all the time. like she’s lived out of home for a really long time and I haven’t. and I haven’t had anyone to show me the ropes really. and she makes me feel like I do everything wrong and ugh.

like she just came home and the first thing she did was yell at me because I used all her laundry powder and apparently it was the wrong one. I was planning on buying her another one that’s why I didn’t bother limiting how much I used. like why was the first thing she did when she got home check my washing??????

im so fucking stressed at the moment. my mum is sick. im waiting to hear back from uni. someone hit my car at the start of december and I don’t have my own car. i work ungodly hours. my one and only friend who still lives where I do is on holidays at the moment so I have no one else to see to rant to. she adds to an amount of stress that I don’t need.

anyways I apologised and got in my car to go to woolies to get dinner and more fucking stupid ass laundry powder and cried the entire way.

— now i’m done shopping and might just sit in my car for an hour in woolies carpark tbh

— also i know she only started vacuuming as soo as she got home from work to prove a point

okay thank u sorry im okay.

i need a james potter or eddie munson to comfort me please. okay shut up aerial.

#rant #aerial rants!!!! #aerial is probably being dramatic

[purplesurveys]

1596

Is Christmas your all-time favorite holiday? If so, why? I count my birthday as a holiday, and that’s actually my favorite one – I’m more intense with preparations and treats on my birthday than any other holiday. I feel like my overall feelings about Christmas are dulled knowing the reason why it’s even celebrated in the first place. I’m here just for the food and the 2-week company shutdown I get to enjoy, lol. Is Christmas more about presents or family? Family (and food, haha). Never been about the presents for me in the sense that I wouldn’t mind if someone didn’t have a gift for me; I do like getting presents for my loved ones though, just to let them know they’re always in my thoughts.

Do you have your Christmas tree and decorations up? We have a Christmas tree that’s bombarded with decorations, and we we put that up starting either late October or early November. We used to have a wreath by our front door, too, but we haven’t done that in a few years.

Do you even decorate? Yeah, just the tree. It’s filled with every kind of Christmas tree trinket you can think of, though.

Have you ever told a person that they are all you want for Christmas? Nah, not even with my last partner. I find it too cringey lol.

What are you hoping to get this Christmas? All I asked for is anything with BTS’ faces on it, doesn’t matter if it’s an authentic product or fanmade or replicas, to make it easier for everyone who might have no clue what to get me. But really, I’m fine with anything and nothing. It sounds so pretentious LOL but honestly the effort and presence of family and friends alone is enough.

By any chance is it a game console? I don’t think I ever asked for a game console for Christmas, this year being no exception; we weren’t the most well-off family in my childhood years and I didn’t want to put any more pressure for my parents.

Do you even make Christmas lists? I make Christmas shopping lists, if that’s what you mean. Mine is more or less done, just have around 4-5 people to buy for and I’ll be all set.

Are you grateful with anything you get for Christmas? Yes. Comes with the upbringing. I have relatives who have difficulties getting by, so if I get anything from them at all I know it must have taken lots of effort and thought. I’m grateful for literally anything and I make sure to use everything I receive, whether it’s a generic mug or headband or phone stand or whatever.

Have you ever given away a gift because you didn't like it? No. I’m honestly just genuinely grateful for any gift I get! And I like to make good use of every single one.

Have you ever gotten a gift that you felt like you couldn't accept? Yeah, last year my friends got together and we basically exchanged K-pop merch with one another so I felt super shy accepting what they got me! I feel like I felt this the most with Reena’s gift - a picket of Taehyung, hahaha.

Are you going to do any traveling this Christmas? Just short-term trips - we’re heading south on the 25th to gather with my dad’s side. We also have a quick vacation the weekend immediately after New Year’s.

Is anyone coming to visit you for Christmas? No, we’re the ones doing all the visiting.

In your opinion, what is Christmas really all about? Spending time with family that you only get to see during this time of the year.

Do you enjoy the 25 days of Christmas on some TV channels? I have no clue what this means.

What Christmas movie is your favorite? Love Actually and It’s A Wonderful Life!

Have you seen 'A Christmas Story'? If so, did you like it? I haven’t seen it.

Do you think that 'How the Grinch Stole Christmas' is lame or classic? I’ve never seen that either.

What is the first Christmas movie you have seen this month? Haven’t watched anything Christmas-y so far. The only thing I’ve binge-watched is Breaking Bad, and that is the furthest thing that would give you holiday vibes lol.

Do you enjoy listening to Christmas music? Eh, not really. I like the jazzy kinds, but overall I rarely turn on Christmas playlists. Mariah Carey, Michael Buble, and Friends™ are way too overplayed during the holiday season anyway.

Do you really get involved in the Christmas spirit? Idk what this question is trying to ask, so I guess not. Like I said, I am largely here for the food and the 2-week vacation I get to get, lol.

Does the Christmas environment make you feel comfortable? You know what? I’m really glad and grateful that it’s been starting to actually feel that way. I had the worst seasonal depression every single year a while back, and Christmas was always something I dreaded. If I wasn’t in a family reunion that I didn’t want to be in, I kept myself locked in my room where I watched whatever comfort show I felt like watching. Not the case anymore.

Do you donate toys for the toy drive this time of year? Not toys. But I’m looking at donating money for a few animal shelters I follow. When I’m able to save up more, I’d love to give in-kind donations, like leashes, pet food, etc.

What is the best Christmas gift you have ever received? Paramore tickets.

Have you ever cried on Christmas day? Maybe Christmas 2020 because it was my first post-breakup Christmas? Idk I barely remember anything from the time but I’m not ruling out crying.

Are you usually the first one to wake up on Christmas day? I haven’t noticed. Probably not.

Are your favorite colors red and green? No, my current favorite is purple.

What colors do you like to see in Christmas lights? Yellow.

Have you ever helped your friends decorate for Christmas? No, that’s usually a family thing where I’m from, and I’m not about to interrupt their own decorating sesh.

Do your Christmas decorations stay up until New Year's? Until the end of January; that’s how long the Christmas season is here.

Are you usually the one that takes down the decorations? Our entire family does, since we have a million Christmas tree decors up.

In your opinion, what is the best gift you have ever given someone? Unfortunately that title belongs to stuff I’ve given my last partner; I always went down the sentimental path when it came to giving them gifts, so there were a few presents that I was a little prouder of. But putting that aside, probably the film camera I’m getting my cousin and his fiancée this year! They recently got engaged, so I thought of getting them that so they can capture more 2023 memories the old-school way.

Have you ever given someone a gift they didn't like? I’m sure. Nobody can get it right all the time. < This. I’ve had to be resourceful in the past when I wasn’t earning yet, and I’m sure I had misses here and there.

Is it really the thought that counts? Yeah. Again, it all boils down to perspective since I have loved ones who aren’t the most well-off but insist on buying presents. I’m grateful for anything I receive even if I never really expect stuff from anyone. 

Do you throw Christmas parties every year? Well our house is a little farther than everyone else’s and is also a bitch to get to, so as much as we want to host parties we don’t really do so to avoid hassling people. We’re the ones who do the visiting. I host parties for other stuff though, like if there are online BTS concerts to watch.

Do you even enjoy Christmas parties? Yeah, but it depends on the crowd. Parties with family and friends are great, but my social battery drains out faster if I’m at like a company Christmas party.

What happened on the worst Christmas you ever had? I’d say 2020 because I had to fake a smile through most of it when I was crushingly depressed inside. But it also allowed me to recognize the people and things I did have around me.

Has Christmas been on your mind more and more as the days go by? It’s barely in my mind, honestly. I can’t even believe it’s already the 21st -- I have none of my presents wrapped, and tomorrow I still have to shop for 3 more people lol. I’m mostly ecstatic that I get 2 weeks off work and want to focus on resting up and powering up for 2023.

Do you usually count down the days until Christmas? Only as a kid, when Christmas used to feel a lot bigger and more exciting. Only thing I’m counting down for anymore is Jin’s discharge from the military...

Do you know people who hate Christmas? I used to – the person was me. These days I don’t think anyone I know hates the holidays.

What age did you stop believing in Santa Clause? I never believed tbh and I remember being 4 or 5 and questioning his ‘midnight visits.’ I didn’t understand why I had to be asleep for him to drop by.

Do you host any kind of Christmas event or help with it? Starting last year my Army friends and I get together for Christmas to exchange gifts and have some drinks, and we plan that out together. This year’s gathering is going to be tomorrow.

Do you like eggnog? I’ve never tried but I’d love to have it someday!

Have you ever done a 'Secret Santa'? Yes, monito-monita is a big tradition in our extended family, on my mom’s side, and we’ve been doing it...pretty much the entire time I’ve been alive, lol.

Do you hate to see people sad on Christmas? I mean, I don’t like seeing people sad at any time of the year. < This is true. To answer the question more directly though, I guess I feel for people who don’t want to be alone on Christmas but end up so.

Have you ever ruined someone else's Christmas? I hope not? Idk for sure.

Do you decorate any online profiles for Christmas? No.

If you could live Christmas over day after day, would you? No. Imagine how tiring/draining that would be...

Do you have any pets that you buy Christmas presents for? No, it’s not like they can grasp the context of Christmas lol. Their dinners during this time of the year get a whole lot fancier though LOL

Are you or have you ever been in a Christmas play? If so, which one was it? Nopes.

Does Christmas get old year after year? Not for me, but I empathize with people who feel this way. Personally, I feel that it doesn’t get ‘old’ per se; it’s just that the older you get, the bigger shoes you have to fill, you know? You start to be the grownup who helps the other grownups in organizing parties, who has to think of nieces and nephews and family friends to give presents to, who has to start paying attention on whether or not you’re keeping within budget, who has to focus on feeding people and making sure everyone comes home full, etc. Christmas is largely a test of practicality for me at this point.

Do you like, love, or hate Christmas shopping? I dread it at the start when I open my shopping apps and there are like 47374934723822038207483 stuff to choose from. But being able to find a good gift for someone is always a nice feeling.

Has anyone ever ruined your Christmas? I remember having to take care of 50 work-related deliveries in the middle of Christmas in 2020. Same year I also had a client who needed reports to be done on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, so I was literally working on my laptop while in the car and on the way to see family.

Have you witnessed your neighbors arguing on Christmas? (I have, bad scene) I haven’t. People are just karaokeing all over the place lol.

Are you working on Christmas? We have a company shutdown that started today and lasts until January 3rd, but of course that doesn’t permit us to completely shut off our lines from our clients. Urgent things that can’t be avoided still have to be attended to, of course, but in general we have these two weeks off to relax.

Have you ever had to work on Christmas? Yeah, I touched on that a bit earlier.

Have you ever lost someone special on Christmas? Fortunately not during the Christmas season. But like most people I’ve had to deal with those ‘first Christmases’ - first Christmas without a grandparent, a friend, a pet, etc who died earlier in the year.

Is Christmas better than New Year's or are they both equally awesome? I love New Year’s. It was always the more exciting holiday for me.

Are you really excited for Christmas? Not really, it’s just nice to be off work. < Completely this. 

Did you like this survey? I hope so. Well, bye! ^_^ Sure, thanks!

[insomniamamma]

thanks for tagging me @oonajaeadira​ ❤️

Tag some mutuals you want to get to know better! Copy and paste into a new post--don't reblog please!

Favourite time of the year: Fall. My optimal ambient temperature is about 65 degrees. I love when it cools off enough that I am not a constant ball of sweat. I love when it's cool enough for hoodies and maybe needing an extra blanket at night. I also love the way the air smells when the leaves start to turn. Halloween! Crunchy leaves! My husband and I both have fall birthdays, so that's also nice.

Comfort food: Spaghetti and meatballs. Spaghetti sauce with meatballs is one of my favorite things to cook. I also put some Italian sausage in there.To do it right, you've got to cook it low and slow for hours. It makes the house smell sooooo good. The hubby and son are perfectly content with leftovers so I usually make a pretty big batch. And really, is there anything in life better than a nice pile of pasta drowning in sauce?

Favourite dessert: Pie. Pretty much any kind of pie. I learned how to make pies around the time I quit smoking. This was almost 20 years ago, but I remember everything just tasting amazing. It was a delicious mistake. I was the one who quit smoking but me and the hubby both gained weight. I mostly save them for the holidays now. I love a slice of warm from the oven apple pie with a scoop of good quality vanilla ice cream and maybe a bit of sharp cheddar cheese.

Things you collect: Rocks, fossils, bones, feathers and shells. I can't go anywhere in nature without coming home with a pocket full of rocks.

Favourite drink: Diet Dr. Pepper

Favourite musical artist: This is so hard. Right now I am going to call it a tie between Nick Cave & The Bad Seeds and David Bowie.

Last song you listened to: Golden State-- Eddie Vedder & Natalie Maines

Last movie you watched: I haven't sat down and watched a movie in a while. Might have been a Prospect re-watch.

Last series you watched: The Sandman.

Series you’re currently watching: Crash Course Geography. It's a show on youtube. The episodes are only about 15 minutes a pop but I feel like I've learned more about geography from this show than I ever did in high school.

Current obsession: Pedro Pascal (obviously), The Sandman, especially The Corinthian. WTF. I did not need another hot villain in my life. Dominion, the card game. We've been teaching my son how to play. We've only got the first edition base game, but that has plenty of repeat play-ability on its own. My son is 8 and he regularly kicks the shit out of us at Dominion. He got the basic mechanics after like two hands and now he routinely clobbers us. It's interesting because he will do things that look like they should absolutely not work and then when it's time to count up the victory points he's absolutely  kicked our asses. It makes me feel like I'm raising him right, or at least, that he is succeeding despite me.

Dream place to visit: Ireland, Scotland, Germany. These are places where my family has roots and I would like to see them first hand.

A place you’ve been that you want to go back to: Tokyo. Kenai, Alaska. Joshua Tree. Maui.

Something you want: For it to get cold enough to kill the mosquitos. I can't even hang out with my outside cat without turning into chuck steak. Also about 8 more hours in each day.

Currently working on: Halloween costume research. My son wants to be The Mandalorian (YAY!) He wanted to be Luke Skywalker and then he saw a pre-made Mandalorian costume at Sam's Club and he was like "If you don't think you can make one more realistic we can always buy this one." *cracks knuckles* are you challenging me little boy? He wants to be Mando, he's cast my husband as Cobb Vanth (hubs would make a fantastic Cobb Vanth) and he wants me to be Cara Dune. So I've got some work to do lol. Also I've been working on a Liminal AU fic and a Din Djarin x insecure!reader fic.

tagging: @grogusmum @honestly-shite @writeforfandoms @quica-quica-quica @fromthedeskoftheraven @artemiseamoon @spookoofins @dewy-39

[lqfiles]

METEORNON LIFE UPDATE WE ARE BACK AFTER 10 DAYS 🗣️‼️

🥁🥁🥁🥁

MY EXAMS ARE OVER 🥳🥳 the universe cheered !! I literally just gave my last exam this morning and it's 3:30pm rn we are so excited (the excitement will last a day until I'm bored)

I spent the day arranging my course material and being productive (felt nice) (because I know I'll rot for the whole break otherwise) anyway I have plans to be a girl (I'm just a girl) and order this really cute tote bag I saw online it was so cool

OTHER THAN THAT OH OH USER LQFILES I WATCHED A REALLY REALLY AMAZING MOVIE idk if you know about it. It's a Japanese movie called even if this love disappears from the world tonight and it's so 🥹🥹🥹🥹 it's so 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 heartbreaking. What if I collapse on the floor and cry. You should watch it ( of course you don't have to) if you're into sad soul shattering stuff (gonna go off a bit here and summarize the premise: there's a girl who has anterograde amnesia which is where your memories don't accumulate. So whenever she wakes up in the morning, she doesn't remember anything about what happened or what she did the previous day and this happens EVERY SINGLE DAY so she basically has to restart her life everyday. She keeps a diary in which she writes about her day every night before sleeping, and she has all these signs on her bedroom walls that basically tell her that she has amnesia and needs to read her diary to get to know about her life every morning. SO LONG STORY SHORT WITHOUT SPOILERS one day a guy comes up to her and fake confesses to her because some guys who were bullying that guy's classmate told him to do it in case he wanted his friend to stop getting bullied. He fake confesses to her and she SAYS YES and then they fake date, but for a while the guy doesn't know she has amnesia and then he finds out and that is where I'm stopping because everything else is like the main main plot)

I YAPPED QUITE A LOT TODAY ‼️☝️

Anyway it's so sad and I'm in love with it

REGARDING PAY THE PRICE THINGS ARE PROGRESSING I THINK HAECHAN LOWKEY CONSIDERS HER A FRIEND AT THIS POINT

I am also in love with renjun's cat stealing agenda and his and jaemin's dynamic they're so funny (OR RATHER YOU ARE SO FUNNY USER LQFILES 🫵)

ALSO WITH THE ANON WHO TALKED ABOUT JAEHYUN BEING OLD 😭😭😭 I AGREE AND I SEE THIS HAPPENING IN REAL LIFE

anyway phew that was a lot (I hope you weren't alarmed by me suddenly yapping) I'll be activeee and interacting now that I'm not busy (!!) MUCH LOVEEE 🌷🌷🤍🤍🤍 I HOPE YOU'RE WELLLL

-☄️

WE FREAKING MISSED YOU OVER HERE BESFF <33

IM SO HAPPY YOUR EXAMS ARE OVER LETS GOOOO 🥳🥳🎉 how did you think they went? i’m sure you did well and i’m happy that you get to rest now ^^ does this mean you’re officially in your summer holidays now or just a smaller break? LMAOOO YOURE SMART FOR KNOWING YOUR HABITS AND DOING SMRH ABOUT IT because i know if that was me i would wait till last minute 😭

THE WAY I WANT TO BUY A TOTE BAG TOO BRUHH it’s so girly core and girlmaxxing and feminine and ughh i just love being a girl..

shatter shoul stuff WELL YES GIVE IT TO ME… i normally don’t watch movies or dramas (when i tell you.. i have not watched ANY classic movie, not even spider-man or mean girls or fuckass MOANA. name a movie and i probably haven’t watched it 😭) but i REALLY wanna start doing so, BUT THAT SOUNDS AMAZINF AS FUCKK WAITT i can already sense the angst and heartbreak from that poor girl i’m already tearing up 😭😭😭 (i’m dramatic) i’ll definitely write it down and try to watch it soon (if you can recommend me where to watch it i would appreciate it.. preferably i pirated website 🙏🏽)

haechan doesn’t HATE her but also doesn’t LIKE her yk? its mostly y/n who just wants him gone while haechan is just playing around at this point lmaoo. i’m glad you like the side characters too and thank yew for calling me funny you’re flatter me anon 😣 just say you wanna kiss me..

NEVER APOLOGISE FOR HEING A YAPPER I LOVE YAPPERS WE YAPPERS ALL NEED TO UNITE, can’t wait to see you again anon take care and enjoy your break ^^ <3

#asks. #from ☄️ anon #( pay the price ) #its embarrassing how little movies i have watched.. #i wanna watch totally killer soon idk if you watched that

[wexarethewalkingxdead]

WHAT - 7. What’s the first thing we’d see in your fridge? 10. What does your everyday, average day look like? WHY - 12. Do you like having many friends, just a handful, one, or none? Why? 13. If you could live in a movie or movie franchise, which would it be? Why? 14. Think about one of the things you would really like to do, try or learn. Do you plan to do it eventually? Why haven’t you done it? 16. Do you find communication easy or difficult? Why? 20. Why are you really RPing? WHO - 29. Who are your favourite characters? WHEN - 32. When do you usually go to bed? Do you fall asleep immediately? 33. When is the right time to say no? (Choose your topic) WHERE - 42. Where would you go for a holiday if it was your last chance to on this earth? 48. If you could time travel, where and when would you go? HOW - 54. Aside from writing, how do you spend your free time? 55. Is there someone in your life you feel you should be spending more time with? How much time are you spending with them now? 56. How important is getting to know a mun when writing with them? 58. How important is writing to you?

MUNDAY RP MEMES 

WHAT

7. What’s the first thing we’d see in your fridge?

Currently, a large order of cheese dip and salsa from our favorite Mexican restaurant in town.

10. What does your everyday, average day look like?

It's pretty quiet. I get up and eat something and help my Mom with my great-niece whom we babysit while her parents work. When she goes home, I make sure that my husband's coffee is ready for when he gets up to go to work. Then we watch television and take care of our dogs before I get online for the evening. There are other little things here and there but that's the gist of my day.

WHY

12. Do you like having many friends, just a handful, one, or none? Why?

I like having a handful because I'd rather be closer to a few than have a lot of not close relationships with a lot of people.

13. If you could live in a movie or movie franchise, which would it be? Why?

It's not a movie franchise but a television franchise. It would be H2O: Just Add Water because I really feel like I was a mermaid in another life. I absolutely love the idea of being a secret mermaid and living in Australia's sunshine and beautiful country.

14. Think about one of the things you would really like to do, try or learn. Do you plan to do it eventually? Why haven’t you done it?

I've been considering learning how to crochet. Every time I have the opportunity to buy the supplies to start, I talk myself out of it because I have Psoriatic Arthritis and my fingers give me so much trouble because they are permanently crippled. So while I'd really love to try, I don't want to make myself hurt worse than they do on their own with just typing and the things that I have to do.

16. Do you find communication easy or difficult? Why?

It really depends on the person. Sometimes personalities make it harder to communicate than it does with others. But I do try as hard as I can to make it work all the way around for both parties. It doesn't always work though.

20. Why are you really RPing?

Because I love collaborating with others and seeing how they play their muses. It's more challenging than solo writing.

WHO

29. Who are your favourite characters?

Fox Mulder (The X-Files), Carol Peletier/Rick Grimes (The Walking Dead, and Marcus Kane (The 100).

WHEN

32. When do you usually go to bed? Do you fall asleep immediately?

I usually lay down around one or two, but it takes me a bit to fall asleep. And I have to have a television going to stay asleep because my brain won't shut off.

33. When is the right time to say no? (Choose your topic)

The moment that it doesn't feel right or good.

WHERE

42. Where would you go for a holiday if it was your last chance to on this earth?

Disney World. With my entire family.

48. If you could time travel, where and when would you go? 

I would go back to April 26, 2005. I would tell my Dad everything that something was telling me to tell him that night before I went to bed. The next day it was too late, and I never got to tell him that I loved him and that I was grateful for everything that he had ever done for me and my son.

49. Where is your least favourite place and why?

The dentist's office. Because it causes me a lot of anxiety.

HOW

54. Aside from writing, how do you spend your free time?

With my family. I also dabble in making jewelry and playing video games.

55. Is there someone in your life you feel you should be spending more time with? How much time are you spending with them now?

My son. I wish we had more in common and could go and do things like when he was little.

56. How important is getting to know a mun when writing with them? 

Honestly, you're not going to be best buddies with everyone that you write with. So being able to reach out when you need to communicate about the plot/thread/etc is always a plus. But there will always be some that you are closer to than others. And that's totally okay.

58. How important is writing to you?

I've always been a writer of sorts. I wrote short stories about horses as a kid and poetry as an angsty teen and twenty-year-old. It is important to me because it helps me to get out of my creativity that is all up in my head. Even if it doesn't always come out the way I planned it.

#.maildrop #anonymous

[user1896380]

I take antidepressants and recently my psychiatrist lowered my dosage because I was binge eating a lot and she said that this could be due the high dosage of the antidepressant.

The result: I am not binge eating anymore (thank god) but I’m so depressed. Really. I’ve been doing nothing all day, just re-reading all romances on my bookshelf over and over again.

I’m on break from college because of the holidays but on my first week back I have a test and I haven’t even started studying yet… My doctor have a second prescription in case I got too depressed again so I could buy more, but I’m not going to take it, I finally can say no to food without feeling bad, that’s all I ever wanted. But at what cost?

I know what being depressed makes to me, it’s awful, but at least in my case, Ana comes with depression, I isolate from everyone, have no energy to do stuff and am mean to myself.

All I want is Ana back. And even knowing that being depressed is bad, I kinda want it. I want my family worrying about me, that I don’t leave my room. I want people at work to wonder why I’m not eating with them anymore. I want my colleagues at college to look at my and think how did I lose so much weight, if it’s everything okay with me.

But at the same time. If people actually care, they might want to stop me, so that’s a thing…

My mind is so messed up right now. I want Ana but don’t to stop studying and not cleaning my room os taking good care of myself. I wish I could balance it all :(

[meditatewithfernando]

We wish you a Happy New year 2024 with plenty of abundance.

We wish you a Happy New year 2024! Hello there! I hope you all are great! How are the holidays going? This week I bring you a quick entry to wish you a Happy New year 2024. We will enter a year full of opportunities, transformations, and good times. It is time for you to focus on this, but really, from the heart. As you know from the Principle of Mentalism, you must put your whole being. It would be best if you didn't project that a year is ending and everything is already solved with the new one. I wish you a great year, and for those who didn't see this last year, you can now. I want to be honest and tell you that this is not the case, and you know it. If we are based on linear time, it has only been a few minutes. Nothing special has happened. Everyday minute passes. It is something widespread. Also, knowing the Hermetic Principles, you know that it takes a little more than "a few minutes" you have to take action. Don't forget this! It is time to start projecting your desires so that you already feel they are a reality. As there is always a lot of hope in the world (collectively, those "few minutes" are highly valued.) Thanks to this and the Principle of Vibration, it will be easier for you to materialize your desires. The best form to start a happy new 2024! Happy New Year 2024 and happy road to abundance. I wanted to leave you a quick post, but I wanted to comment briefly on this topic. As you know, I always like to share a dose of light, even if it is, while wishing you the year. I invite you to find good moments of silence and reflect. About what? That is something that you must find. Therefore, if you don't know, you can also introspect to find little things to focus on and empower yourself. Sometimes letting your mind flow is wonderful, especially if you find small improvements that bring great transformations. But come on, I want to invite you to see each other in those moments you long for so much. These abundance meditations to manifest will help you a lot. Well, speaking of meditations. We already run out of last week's offer, but you can imagine I will extend it another week. Therefore, until next Wednesday, the healings, meditations, and courses have 2x1. That is, if you buy a meditation, I give you another. The same with the courses and even the healings. This option is not available for readings or the "Christmas Bundle," nor any other options besides the abovementioned. It would be best if you mentioned that you want the 2x1 deal.. And since I mentioned it, I also leave the Christmas bundle until next week. It sure helps for you to have a happy new year 2024. I'm sure this post looks familiar to you, but I want you to have this same reflection this year (or for the first time if you haven't followed me since last year since this is essential.) Now, check these out! There are a lot of great articles; however, there are a few essential reads that may be of interest to you, so check them out: - You: How to get to know yourself and get out the most from your life? - What are some things people should know about astral projection, meditation, or spirituality in general? - Astral Travel: Get out of your body. Quick and easy Astral Projection Guide. - Dream Types: Dreams and Lucids, super-lucid, sleep paralysis, and more! - What are the chakras? How to open, heal, and expand them right now! - What is the difference between a Lucid Dream and an Astral Projection? And with this concludes the last entry of the year. Next week we will have the forecast, and thus we are already heading toward a prosperous transformation. I wish you a Happy 2024! See you next Wednesday! Don't forget to visualize positivity and feel gratitude. I am pretty sure you are going to enjoy the read! See you next Wednesday! So, If you do not want to miss a single update, click below to join our weekly newsletter, and you will gain access to exclusive content. Subscribe now! I invite you to check earlier posts: seventh, sixth year, fifth year, fourth year, third year, second year, first year. Love & Light, Lots of blessings and abundance your way! (Home) Rev. Fernando Albert Read the full article

[undergradinlife]

September 25th

Hey James, 

It’s finally starting to feel like fall and that means the holidays are starting soon. The holidays used to mean that I would see you, back when our families used to celebrate together and we would stay up all night talking and laughing. I haven’t spent the holidays with my family in four years now because of travel expenses, and Dan’s family lives close by so it was easier to see them anyways. I guess I can’t do that this year. In two weeks my parents are coming into town to see me, which means that I’ll be hosting Thanksgiving. So I’m spending the holidays with my parents this year. Everything is changing so quickly. 

Last night I went out with Sandra again and we went dancing. When we got there I ran into a girl that I used to live with three years back when Dan and I had roommates. Her boyfriend at the time assaulted me and nobody in the house believed me. Dan didn’t even stand up for me. I hugged her, she apologised, I apologised. I’m glad that she’s okay. Outside, I saw three people who I used to work with and we talked for a bit. Inside again, I saw two more. Sandra and I joked that at this point I knew the entire club. We walked home together happy and passed out the minute we got to my bed. Every single person I saw that night was someone that was no longer in my life. I held Sandra while we slept and hoped that she would keep being my friend. 

Sometimes I feel like my friendships and connections come with an expiry date; one day everything’s good, and the next day I’ve spoiled- they don’t want me anymore. I can’t think of many friendships I’ve had that haven't ended this way. I move on, I make new connections and new friends. In high school, I moved away so that I could leave that behind and finally have lasting friendships. Sometimes I wonder if I should leave here too. I want to give the world to the people that I love. I make gifts, buy small things for my friends just because it reminds me of them, and check in on how they are. I listen to what the people around me want and something in me wishes that I could do all of those things for them. For as long as I can remember, I’ve always had an open heart and trusted that everything would be okay. I’m scared that after one more heartbreak I might put my guard up. I’m scared that the world is never going to stop hurting me- that everything will keep changing and one day I won’t want to keep up with it anymore. 

On Thursday night Sandra and I went to five different spots looking for apple pie, but all of them were sold out. On Saturday night we did the same thing but they were all sold out again. Yesterday I told my coworker Tyelor about it and at the end of the shift he walked over with a bag and handed me an apple pie. I opened myself up and lost so much of myself to people who didn’t care for the things I did, but Tyelor found me an apple pie and the world isn’t all bad. 

All love, 

undergradinlife

#diary #diary entry #journal #journaling #journal entry #story #blog #blogger #daily journal