#and it triggered a lot in me today

[gabetheunknown]

I just wanna say, because it is something that I have HEAVILY struggled with in the past and still am struggling with to this day,

- You're allowed to put away your phone upon reading things that anger/saddens you

- You're allowed to focus on things that distract you from this horrendous news

- You're allowed to be happy about your own wins, and focus on your own life, and come back to this when you have the strength

if it is not the time for you to do something right now, it simply isn't the time for you to do something right now

Trust me if you're not doing something, someone else definitely will, we're not staying still and we will pick you up whenever you're ready to go

#look ive been dealing with cptss and ditching my entire family #who are probably up in their conservative hypochristian lil village celebrating this big win for them #and it triggered a lot in me today #in a good way this time #i am angry #but listen #it has happened numerous times in the past where I didn't have any energy left in me after reading such news #so i left someone else to do something #i stayed on the background #celebrating as things changed in positive ways #I even had times where I ignored politics altogether #and that was okay too #you're only one person #who can deal with only so much #take care of yourself 💕 #cptss in my first tag is supposed to be cptsd of course but i dont wanna go back and correct it #gabe's thoughts

[martyrbat]

i dont know who needs to hear this but you do not need to go on a diet. you do not need to lose weight as a new year revolution. you do not need to feel shame for gaining any weight over the holidays and for enjoying yourself and the food. you do not need to tolerate diet talk after setting a boundary and if someone cant respect that then theyre being the asshole. you already have a summer body. you already are hot. theres no moral failure or shame in being fat

#been around a lot of bullshit today thats so so so exhausting and triggering #but a reminder for me as much as you. love you all & i hope this season is gentle to you

[caffeinatedopossum]

I kind of hate how just because I don't subscribe to any religion or believe in any specific god, people assume that means that I *disbelieve* in god(s)

I simply don't have much reason to think about whether or not there's a god, besides when I just want to enjoy some good old philosophical/hypothetical thinking or conversations.

Like people will hear I'm not Christian and go "how come you don't believe in god?" like no, no you misunderstand me. I don't NOT believe in god, I just don't believe in *your* god. And if your god is real, then it changes nothing about how I'm going to live my life. The Christian god is an ass and not someone I'm going to worship. I'm just gonna spend my life trying to do good, and if your god doesn't like that, then he's not a very good god, is he?

#anyways talking about religion is not something i normally do #but ive just been thinking about this today #im always hesitant to talk about Christianity because i dont want people to start some sort of war against me #accusing me of hating christians or something #the truth is Ive been severly traumatized by my experience with the Christian church #and because of that i cant really talk to or be friends with Christians anymore due to it being too triggering #but theres A LOT of variations in Christianity. some Christians arent half bad #and id like to encourage those good Christians to keep practicing their religion in a way that #benefits them without harming others :3 #i was raised to believe that i had to trust gods moral compass above my own. and yknow what fuck that #thats one belief i wont subscribe to anymore #if god disagrees with my morals thats kinda a fundamental issue for me lol

[retros-artandstuff]

vriska + a transmasc dave doodle

#tryna get into colored pencils again we'll see how it goes #its been a while since ive done a good tag ramble #but like i dont hv anything to ramble about #my art #traditional art #doodles #fanart #homestuck #homestuck fanart #dave strider #dave strider fanart #vriska serket #vriska fanart #oh actually i do hv smth to ramble about today #that being scheduled posts #yknow scheduled posts are actually really convinient and helped me quite a bit #like i used them for a couple months and honestly really liked useing them cuz it allowed me to hv a pretty consistent posting schedule #but in the end i just didnt feel right with it mostly due to the fact that even with it set to post three times a week it felt weird to hav #some of my drawings posting weeks after i finished them. like they were old news to me already but they were barely being released to every #one else it just felt weird for me ig. not to mention that like on the rare occassions that i didnt have anything to post i felt obliged to #draw smth just so i would have smth to post and most of the time that led to me being unhappy with my art. so now ive just decided like fuc #it imma post whenever i want and honestly im really happy with that even if i might be going a little trigger happy with the posting button #recently lmao. ive just been drawing a whole lot and hv so much to post its insane. hell i still hv things in my gallery that i needa post #but ill save those for the next couple of days lol but yeah thanks for coming to my very long ted talk/ramble and goodnight 😴 #damn im such a yapster what the hell

[eddiediaaz]

me: i'm gonna call my mom just to talk but i'm not gonna tell her about my new type 2 diabetes diagnosis because she has a lot on her plate and just told me my grandma is in the hospital again, and i don't wanna add yet another thing to it.

my mom: your voice sounds strange, are you sure you're okay?

me: starts sobbing and tells her everything lol

#also had to tell her about the breakup #asking me if i'm okay when i'm already feeling on the verge of tears is like THE trigger for me #i will start bawling lol (and i did for the second time today. first time was with the doctor when she told me fdskjdfbds) #(i tried really hard to keep it in okay but she just kept going on with the complications if left untreated and it was A Lot) #anyway i love my mom and how supportive she is about this #and my step dad was also yelling supportive things through the phone too lol it was so sweet #i cannot tell my dad yet tho cause i know he'll say shit like “i told you so” (about extra weight complications) and i can't handle this rn #i know he'll be supportive but not in a way i need rn #so i'll tell him one day but not now

[charlie-artlie]

So I've got a new phone and finally have to deal with the reality of not having an audio jack to play music in my car (the car is also old, so no Bluetooth or anything). I've been working through a dusty old cd collection, at least 5-6 years old, which has been fun because along with all the Florence and the machine say anything cds I've got a bunch of cds I burned at the time, at least half of them have absolutely no indication of what's on them (one is marked wtn, so weather songs I liked, another has homestuck fanart so hs songs, and one just says "ay lmao" which I believe was some kind "meme" of that time period).

Anyway all of this was just to explain the full body shock I just experienced when I heard "you're walking in the woods, there's no one around, and your phone is dead..."

#sleeper agent trigger word activated #i think we all collectively decided to forget this song when it came out that shia was an abuser #which. yeah #it just really shocked me to hear it again. theres a lot if music i havent thought abt in years on here #including a blank cd if just random songs and im just listening to it like #hey college charlie. ya doing okay buddy? #anyway i think this cd in particular is my halloween mix #theres songs on here that are STILL on my halloween mix today. crazy #charlie chatterbox

[sskk-manifesto]

♡

#Wow. Okay ♡ #I love this episode. The animation is flawless. The drawings quality is out of the world for real. #I love this episode so much I'm so grateful so much care and dedication went to this sskk centered episode. #(Refraining to talk about what 5x03 could have been) #Sorry for repeating myself but seriously the illustrations this episode are so so pretty. #I rarely appreciate how Akutagawa is drawn in the anime but when it comes with this episode I really like how he looks too. #And Atsushi that I already like a lot in the anime on average‚ this episode is just fabulous. Handsome even. #Seriously I don't know who the animators are but I want to kiss them. This art style is one I dare say I like even more than Dead Apple– #that although is obviously more detailed is just... In comparison too rough for my personal taste? #The art style for this episode is very delicate and soft and I love it tons #And the directing is just great. No weird pacing or awkward ost choice. It's neat. #The reiterated placing ss/kk on opposite sides is neat. The lightening is likeable and especially the purple scene is super pretty. #The “don't compare me to him” scene is neat. The ss/kk final scene is AMAZING. It's gorgeous and stunning and awestriking and every other– #epitome in the world. It's like the only scene I believe turned out better in the anime that it is in the manga which is saying SO MUCH. #But it's really that good!!!!! My favourite anime ss/kk scene ever. #Aaaaaahhh please let me talk about it forever it's sooo pretty and especially poignant... #The heaven-like soft yellow light and how it contrasts with the bleak stormy background. But especially their softening features... #Man that scene. okay. Akutagawa's quiet surprise!!!! That scene is. Idk. Unfortunately chapter 88 exists– #but it's nearly the most romantic thing ever. #I'll leave it at this. It's not like the bsd animation suddenly became a masterpiece and this is still an episode– #I would say I like less than my least liked k/l/k episode (Trigger animation my beloved). But in comparison with the rest of the anime– #It's really bsd anime at its peak #random rambles #Aah peoples btw I'm probably going to spam ss/kk‚‚‚‚ a lot today. Apologies in advance unfollow me now etc. etc.

[chitaquagirl]

feeling dire

#definitely mostly pms but also other things . SCARED!!! #lots of stuff happening to create Perfect circumstances for me to have a very bad time #and generally. i am FAR more prone to depression than anxiety but atm i am a ball of nerves #meds on back order. Scary!!! makes me feel like i need to ration my current supply (i rly don’t) #SCHOOL. RLY SCARY. didn’t go to class today. So many assignedments to work on and they just keep piling up!! #need to meet w my prof abt research. SCARY!! bc i have been slacking like crazy 🫠 #and the biggest anxiety inducer. Money!!! which is DUMB!!!! bc objectively i don’t need to worry!!!!!!! #but unexpected thangs are in motion so i am having to pay > $700 more than anticipated a month #which again. this is manageable. Not ideal but given my jobs i can handle it #i just wasn’t expecting it and now feel very out of sorts #since i was a little kid ive had this weird truly unreasonable and irrational anxiety abt money #and this is unfortunately triggering a lot of that again #which is bad bc it makes everything else spiral. ex. need to save -> buying less groceries/policing what i eat -> ed relapse #just feeling very very stupid and upset 🥴 #pers

[ingo-ingoing-ingone]

could you do me a favor and tag whenever there are ocs in your reblogs? thank you very much

I've so far didn't see much of it on your blog but I just noticed it and I would appreciate it very much.

I can try, but anon, I don't always know what's an OC and what is a canon character in the vast world of Pokémon that I've just never seen before.

Do like minor OCs to fill in gaps in fics count? What about characters who are truly blank slates, like some of the depot agents?

I can try and tag when there's like major OCs but when it comes to minor characters that's where I'm not gonna split hairs.

I guess the tags will be #others ocs and less commonly #my ocs

#anon #I'm not gonna lie I'm giving you a hard side eye as to why you want this #it feels really rude #remember: every single character you know and love is someone's OC #also before anyone @ me: if the very concept of OCs was a trigger I doubt a person with said trigger #would be comfortable with any form of fandom or headcanon or fanfic #maybe I'm wrong but yeah #not in the mood today for figuring this out #anyways OCs are cherished and loved here by the owner of this blog #even if this is a canon character blog not an OC blog #(admittedly I'd reblog more OCs interacting with submas if it wasn't a lot of shipping which isn't my thing) #but when I see OCs interacting with submas in a platonic way I am happy to reblog it :) #sorry if any of this seems rude I'm tired and my mental state is not good #and admittedly. I'm kinda tired of trying to guess what people mean and always giving the benefit of the doubt #please bear with me I'm sorry

[trashquisitor-shirozora]

I keep feeling like I’m taking the mandalorian s3 way too seriously when I get mad about what’s happening… but I just can’t help how upset it’s making me 😭 I stopped watching after episode 2 but have kept up for the most part. Going through the mando tag here on tumblr is so surreal because there are people actually thinking the direction makes sense and that DinxBo is a natural next step?? Anyway, I really appreciate reading your thoughts on how it’s all going. Makes me feel like I’m not alone in this!

(I hope you don't mind me lumping my response/thoughts re: your ask in here too, @just-prime, since uh there are a lot of spoilers in it and I'm not sure it's a good idea to make it public)

You have every right to be upset. This is a show you invested in, a show that sold you a story of a lonely Mandalorian bounty hunter and his Force-sensitive child in a post-war galaxy. It gave you story beats and the promises of adventure, trials and tribulations, and self-discovery in the micro and the macro. There was a road map in all the ways Din discovered and challenged himself as he gave up basically everything he ever knew about himself, his covert, and the galaxy to keep the child safe and get him to his kind. There was a story to be told here in Din taking his helmet off in front of other living beings to save Grogu and in Din winning the Darksaber from Gideon despite Bo-Katan's best efforts to get it back.

I wonder how much of this was corporate meddling to keep raking in the money (KKKennedy, is that you and your white girlbossing ways again?), how much of it was success getting into Filoni and Favreau's heads that they think they can turn bullshit to fucking gold, and how much of it was the game plan to MCUfy Disney Wars. This is fascinating the way that the Sequel Trilogy was fascinating, in that somehow, both times, Disney fucked the fuck up.

People will take what they want from whatever they're consuming. It is what it is. I quit after the season premiere because i hated the short runtime, the cramming of three different potential subplots into thirty fucking minutes, the ridiculousness of all three subplots, and, most of all, the desecration of IG-11. I read elsewhere that the season premiere was a hit! People liked it! They were excited by it! Good for them! I'm glad they got something out of it. People got paid and put hours, blood, sweat, and tears into producing this show and I would want for them to know that their efforts were worth something.

But it is so hard to ignore how increasingly inconsistent, aimless, illogical, and bewildering the the entire season has been. We have now seen 7 of 8 episodes and even the 7th episode, supposedly the "best of the series", got a ton of complaints on a storytelling level. I read elsewhere, both on tumblr and twitter, that this season is now very plot-driven rather than character-driven when previously the show was extremely character-driven. Season 1 happened because Din couldn't leave Grogu behind in Imperial hands and thus uprooted himself and his covert with his decision to go back for the child. Season 2 happened because Din was now searching for Grogu's kind while we the viewers knew that Gideon was alive and well and likely still hunting for the child. Season 3 - and I'm saying this as someone who'd been reading reaction posts, summaries, meta, discourse, etc, instead of watching it because I love myself enough to Not Do That - doesn't seem to have that. It really felt like the story beats, wherever the fuck they were, felt more like "now move from Point A to Point B in order to get closer to Point C". They needed to check things off on a list in order to prepare for the MCUfication of the Disneyficaiton of the OG Thrawn Trilogy, something that I know a lot of people want... but at what cost?

I really hate how likely it is that the show is going to push DinxBo on us and I really hate how much people are expecting it and dreading it. I hate the compulsive heternormativity and the expectations and dread that come with it. I hate how it ruins characters and stories. If you like this ship, good for you. Don't talk to me, I don't care.

This really feels like watching The Last Jedi all over again. I was sold on Finn and Rey as co-leads only to be told to my fucking face that white neo-fashy Kylo was now co-leading because for some reason Rey got it into her head to save him? Meanwhile Finn got tazed and shoved to the side in a tone-deaf subplot with Rose, and Poe turned into a bizarre caricature who needed to be taught lessons by older white women. Like, sorry but I can't unsee this shit. I can't undo the betrayal I felt at the bait and switch of the ST.

And now it happened all over again with The Mandalorian. I'll give it one thing: When Din and Greef first encountered the pirates on Space Renn Faire Nevarro, I got those space western vibes again. And for those few seconds, I felt hope that the previous however many minutes were just a rough start and we're back to space westerning our way to Mandalore. That hope died real fast, didn't it? Fuck me, I guess.

I've started using Tumblr's tag tracking feature to keep tabs on the more critical Mandalorian tags. I'll add them to this post so that you can use them yourself. There are also a lot of interesting coversations happening elsewhere by various blogs. You might have to get creative with your tag searching. Just know that just as many people are out there happy with this show, there are just as many who are dissatisfied with it. That's usually how it goes, but man I can't remember the last time I saw a bunch of the fandom community turn on a show/movie/book series the way we've done with The Mandalorian. It's a damn shame because deep down, a part of me is desperate for it to find its feet and get good again. But honestly, with all the announcements that came out of SWC 2023, I think that ship has sailed and the best thing to do is take all the good you can find from it and mold it into your own sand castles.

#shirozora awkwardly responds to asks #the mandalorian #the mandalorian critical #mando critical #the mandalorian season 3 #mando spoilers #mandalorian season 3 spoilers #sorry this ask got a leeeeettle too rambly #but today was a helluva day between all the meta and discousre and being nearly triggered by gif sets from the last minutes #and honestly i just feel so disappointed and frustrated by the writing on the wall #to me it's also running into the same problem I had with Kenobi which was that there was a fixed point that neither show can deviate from #and I have no faith in Favloni being able to give us good storioes up until Filoni's movie comes out #I think a lot of other people have already said so much about various aspects of this show #and quite frankly I'd rather work on my fic now and try not to think that favs and I crossed brain wavelengths at some point in 2021

[painsandconfusion]

What's wrong with comfort?

Aaaaaalrighty then - that caught attention fast.

I know I joke about being hurt/nocomfort like it's edgy or something, but in reality comfort is far too close to real life for me. I've been a caretaker far too much and through far too intense of situations for me to find anything but pain and panic in those scenes.

I absolutely understand people wanting comfort and I'm not saying it shouldn't be there by many means. It's just not healthy for me in fiction. I can emotionally distance myself from the hurt. I can't from the comfort. It puts me back into trauma responses and it hurts. Badly.

Every once in a while I do comfort because the plot demands it or I'm having a very very very hard time and I need a little bit of softness. But those are situations where I'm not able to emotionally connect with the caretaker and I can't be triggered by it.

So that's why I don't do comfort.

I'm very sorry I'm not able to write the content you want to read. It's not healthy for me. It's a personal thing, not by any means objective.

#sand asks #today is the day for being misunderstood #when it rains it pours ig #please give me a little grace #im trying #i have bad ptsd failed caretaker nightmares and stuff like this triggers them #im doing more disclosure than i normally would today #idk maybe ill delete it later #i just get this question a lot and wanted to give it a full answer for once #and im emotionally drained enough rn to write it out #drink water #take care of yourselves

[rosicheeks]

hi Princess

i hope you are doing well

please tell us a little about your new job with the doggies!

#here are a few pictures from today 🥰🫶 #I have SO many pictures now it’s crazy #I should probably go through them cause I’m sure a lot of them are blurry but some are gems I must say #my favorite parts are probably when my yard is quiet and calm for a little bit (usually at night) and I sit down #and usually a bunch of them come rushing over to sit next to me #I can’t tell you how much I love it when a puppy lays on me or sits on my lap #it’s the best 🥰 #there are definitely a few challenges to the job but I’m sure I’ll be able to deal #the hard part is it doesn’t give me enough hours and I don’t think it’ll be enough $$ either #so I’m gonna have to find another job which really really sucks #I’m already so exhausted with this one idk how I’m gonna juggle another one on top of it #but I need to figure out a way to get my own car and move out of my parents place #I love my parents so much but why can’t they just let me be me? #my friend literally said it sounds like they’re putting me on a leash and that’s EXACTLY what it feels like #not gonna get into it but it’s been rough lately #life hasn’t been the best so I’m sorry I’ve been so quiet lately #haven’t replied to anyone in awhile #but thankfully work has been good and I’ve been able to meet some amazing angels 🫶🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️ #I just wish it paid better #also gotta figure out a way to wear my headset so it doesn’t trigger my migraines cause that’s been a struggle #really really REALLY hope one day I’m able to get my own puppy but at least for now I get to take care of other dogs 🥰🥰🥰🥰 #ask #thanks for asking 🫶

[unnerving-presence]

calling wesker my husband and giving him soft kisses just to piss ppl off

wesker has our wedding ring in the pocket of his vest guys trust me we’re married we’re so marri

#had to block a lot of ppl on twt today that didn’t understand how sa works #‘why didn’t he do something’ wow ok tell that to a real victim #he didn’t do anything because he needed her by his side still. that doesn’t mean he wasn’t uncomfortable #he literally killed her later so.. #but yeah i’m just gonna have a strong distaste for excella until the remake where they hopefully take that scene out #lowkey a little triggering 4 me 🧍‍♂️

[ink-asunder]

Im glad that the dragons dogma community is so positive and patient this time around. I mean, DD1 players weren't particularly unkind (they were hands down a pretty chill group in my experience), but it was a videogame in 2012, which means every forum thread had at least one person saying "get gud loser" no matter the context. At least now most forum posts are filled with comments of people not just commiserating, but like admitting to crying about stuff and other people saying "yeah it's frustrating, no shame in letting the tears flow." Like yeah I'm gonna celebrate a less toxic community environment. Hooray for love in a fandom for a game that is canonically about love.

#okay this is kind of a niche confession but i have sensory issues due to autism and sadly dd2 battles get really overstimulating. #its not just 'im frustrated bcuz im not winning;' its that my fight or flight response (anger) is literally triggered during bad battles. #the noise and the repetitive animations and the controller vibration and the pawn down sound effects combined with #literally being helplessly subject to stunlock chains that can last actual minutes with no opportunity to escape is SO hellish. #and i only really care because i like dd2 a LOT and its just really shitty that its a sensory decay experience that i need to recover from #rather than play it to help decompress and recover. #and yeah if i wanted a chill gaming experience i could just play a chill game #but minecraft isnt my special interest! dragons dogma is!! 😂 #and i could play on BBI for HOURS and it not be a problem in the first game so its not like dragons dogma CANT be a comfort game 😂 #the battle philosophy for dd2 is just 'dont stumble and dont get hit' which is. a design choice ngl. #rant #vent in tags #again its not that serious but it made me cry today so here we are

[treesbian]

being mad at my parents for events long passed hours

#man my mom used to have my sisters help her pin me down so she could pop all the pimples on my face. bruh that fucking hurt. also. #worst thing you can do for those... i was having age-typical acne and i guess she just didn't like to look at it?? idk. #the acne itself didn't hurt but there was a lot of it so just like. you know how it does indeed hurt to pop those. well there were a lot #and she didn't stop even when i was crying and screaming bc she wasn't done?? #and she did it to my back too and some of those grew on nerves and hurt even fucking more #and no she was not using properly sterilized equipment or even fresh washed hands thanks for asking <3 she acted entirely on impulse lol #i mean. i guess she knows its wrong **now** bc she hasn't tried anything similar with my baby sister....??? #and shes starting to get acne like i used to have. #idk is that dramatic to be upset about. just imagine being pinched and pricked nonstop for like 2 hours. maybe it wasn't 2 hours. #but also physically restrained too like straight up sat on. is that fucked up.... thats not normal right??? #and uh. a few years ago they held me still to shave my armpits with my dad's clippers bc mom is completely convinced #it isn’t possible to be hygenic as a 'woman' with pit hair or anything bc of Pheromones!!! and when i say goddamn fine #i'll just use men's hygiene stuff then she says that won't work bc Pheromones!!!! #like having a slightly different endocrine system makes ppl a different species or something #anyway. i cried just a little bit when they did that <3 gave me razor burn #and after my dad asked like 'is growing that hair out like. important to your identity or something' and. #well i dont know but that fucking hurt and you violated the choice that *eye* was making with *my* body #man i know mom still thinks she never physically abused me bc she didn't ever like. beat me up or anything but. thats abuse right?? #she still thinks i was calling her abusive out of fucking nowhere. #sometimes she asks 'when was i ever abusive' and i give her an example and she goes 'well that was JUST BECAUSE--' and like. girl. #you think just bc you can justify it to yourself it wasn't abuse? every abuser can justify it to themselves.... #talk tag #man i keep forgetting about how she used to physically restrain me to do her not-dermatologist approved extractions. #i guess it mostly didn't hurt that bad but like. the forcefullness and duration of it. lmao #anyway i found her a late mothers day gift today. its a hairstick with a dragonfly charm #abuse tw #sorry if that triggered anyone b4 i remembered to tag it

[pierswife]

Work doodles ft. "Hey look it me, you want a peek into the good ol mental--" /funny

#the world has been tv static today #not a full on censor noise just static #my boss gave me something I could throw all my attention into and it required a lot of focus so it helped distract me and calm down #doodling also helped #but yeah if there is ANY knowledge I can impart on anyone today: if you're triggered or overstimulated etc don't fucking ignore it #don't be me cause it'll get bad and then you're stuck at work for 8 hours trying to figure out what the fuck you're gonna do #but I'm here I'm alive I'm okay just don't be a fucking idiot like me /funny it's funny laugh-- #data log: manda's doodles #uuuuuuuh ask to tag I guess? I'll tag em as vent doodles just to be safe ig #vent doodles