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cloudypariah · 5 months

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How to perpetrate and sabotage your own kidnapping: A guide for dummies.

- The creation of the board (and its subsequent discovery)

Summary: Step One: host a brainstorming session with your teammates on how best to kidnap your future abductee. Step Two: have said abductee show up half an hour into the session and begin correcting your entire plan. Step Three: realise at the beginning of their impromptu presentation the target has absolutely no idea that they’re the target. Step Four: fail anyway.

Pairing: Dark!Poly!Task Force 141 x fem!Reader

Word count: 1.8k

Content tags: Dark content - Discussions around kidnapping, tense situations. If this is not your cup of tea, please go and find something different might better suited your palate. This is an 18+ fic meaning minors do not interact with this work. No one has permission from me to repost, copy or translate my work. No one has my permission to put my work into any AI source.

Notes: This is my first foray into the COD fandom and will be the first part in a dark comedy series. Please let me know what you think. Not proofread very well, sorry for any mistakes! Thanks for the motivation @live-love-be-unique !

Link to Task Force 141 masterlist / Link to COD masterlist

Captain John Price likes to think he knows his men well enough to trust them when his back is turned. Now that itself doesn’t necessarily mean knowing each and every one of their dirty secrets - he definitely wouldn’t come out smelling like fresh daisies if any number of his were revealed - but it does mean that he has the awareness to recognise that they all share one particular secret.

He sees it in the way Lieutenant Riley’s body language shifts when you give him his medical forms to look over, your consideration at offering him the option to disclose only certain personal information making the reserved soldier relax just enough to offer you a low thanks, accompanied with a stare that stretches on for a few moments longer than considered socially polite.

It’s also so amazingly obvious with Sergeant MacTavish. John’s surprised everyone else misses the way Soap’s smile takes a little longer to fade after departing for yet another mission, your swift congratulations on completing yet another physiotherapy appointment - “ Keep it up the good work big guy” - leaving the Scotsman floating on cloud nine damn near until the plane lands.

And how could he forget Sergeant Garrick? The man’s quick to change his tune and focus up, but the captain has observed Kyle absentmindedly rubbing his shoulder, thumb gingerly stroking the spot where your palm was only moments before, your figure long gone as you retreat down the corridor to where you came from.

No, Jonathan Price doesn’t miss a thing about his men. And it only takes two weeks and a long chat in the corner booth of the bar one quiet night - sans you or Laswell - before somehow his place becomes the meeting point for an unusual, though not unwelcome, topic - you.

More specifically, how to keep you.

The wooden shit box of a sports bar was where the first two facts were confirmed amongst them: 1. Every single one of the 141 men wanted you for themselves, but they weren’t above sharing. 2. You weren’t worth killing each other over, not when there was a much easier solution staring them in the face.

John’s house became the go-to place to discuss fact number three - They needed a plan.

It was Gaz who initially suggested the whiteboard after numerous interjections from Ghost and John; from everything to how to keep this from Laswell, to deciding which of your usual hangouts would provide them with the best opportunity to commence your “relocation”, to how to delicately but firmly explain said "relocation" to you once it was complete. Kyle loves his brothers in arms and never regrets a moment where his life is on the line if it means saving any one of them, but his patience began to wear thin when Soap got bored and started using goddamn paper planes instead of words to get his point across. At that Price finally relented and bought the damn thing.

Now, John was expecting you to pop by his place on Wednesday night to drop some papers off. A perfect opportunity, were it not for the fact that the gentlemen were still disagreeing on where to relocate you. However, it’ll allow you to grow more comfortable with him while he has some alone time with you, your presence like a balm on a wound - soothing and necessary (at least to him).

He had been looking forward to seeing you… tomorrow. So when you turn up not just on the doorstep but in the middle of the bloody hallway in his own bloody home halfway through the 141 “guys night”, his secondary action of shitting bricks quickly overrides his primary instinct to eliminate the threat.

He’s on his way back from the bathroom when he sees you standing, familiar folders firm in your grasp - fucking hell, is that his spare key too? - and a sour expression on your pretty face.

Your eyes narrow further when you spot him, striding over with fury rolling off you in small waves. “Captain Price, I know you did not leave these dossiers on my desk just before the end of my work day with a note stating they all need to be completed by the end of the work day.”

John’s senses are briefly overwhelmed by you being so close to him, the sight of you angry having a different effect on him than what you had originally intended. He’s never seen it before, and his hand twitches when you’re less than a foot away - fluctuating adrenaline or the desire to reach out and hold you, he’s not sure which is more prevalent.

He always forgets to not be so obvious around you, but it isn’t as though you usually notice. (He’s not sure if the thought should make him feel sad or grateful.)

The sounds of his men arguing in the background, merely the next room over, are enough to bring reality crashing down hard.

His voice is deliberately loud and stalwart when replies. “You can’t be here.”

“Tough shit. Your lads night can wait.” You lean past him to the origin of what your gut was telling you was the sounds of the remaining 141 members quarreling. It’s easy to slip past Captain Price once your mind is set, the push of files against his chest preventing him from reacting for a few seconds - all the time you need to move down the hallway to where everyone else is bound to be.

John is quick to rush behind you, the arguing noises having swiftly changed to near cartoon-like crashes just moments before you enter the room.

Ghost has migrated to the corner of the sitting area, standing as stiff as a fucking nutcracker, a mountain of crumpled notes and paper planes spilling out from between his arms. (His mask is still on thank god because it’ll hide exactly how caught out he feels, and if there’s one thing Simon Riley cannot stand it’s feeling like a kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar). His eyes instinctually watch your every move, waiting for your reaction.

Both of your gazes drift to the other side of the room, with neither of you failing to notice how the couch cushions are strewn widely across the space, (with one being stuck on top of a bookshelf for some odd reason) to find not one, but two soldiers gecko’d to the standing whiteboard.

Their demolitions expert is currently splayed out on the left side of the board and desperately grabbing the top of its metal frame, his stomach pressed into the cold porcelain and a left leg hitched up in a poor attempt to conceal the incriminating writing.

Price’s protégé is in a similar state. Dear Gaz has his back against the right side, with his arms outstretched to - much like Johnny - cover as much of their group planning as possible, a coloured marker clasped in each fist.

Two deers in headlights.

The sight of his task force is enough to bring back flashbacks of his original conversation with Kate about bringing these men together because Jesus H. Christ, what the fuck was he thinking?

There are a few moments when nobody moves or dares to breathe…

… except for you, of course.

You waste no time walking over to the two youngest members of the 141 as you attempt to shove them off the board. “Move,” you demand, palms pushing firmly against their sides. “I want to know what’s so important to everyone.” When they refuse, you do your best to stare at them, pleading with a pleasantly soft, “Please.”

Yeah, they both do what you say with ease when they hear that, giving you enough space to take in the somewhat smudged scribbles.

You miss the signal John gives Simon, the Ghost moving closer to your position as John quietly locks the door, and when your attention is drawn back to the board after the other two move you also miss all of the knowing looks shared behind your back. This was very far from ideal, but how can they recover from this?

They hope you understand that whatever comes next, they didn’t plan for it to start this way.

Kyle and John call your name but you ignore them, still processing the information written in front of you.

Johnny flexes his hands, preparing for the worst as you step back and say, “This is… bullshit.”

Every single member stops. That was not the reaction they were expecting.

Turning to face the group, you scoff. “I’m not even kidding. Firstly, you’re using guys' night to work, which is horrible for your mental and emotional health. And you should all know better.”

Four sets of brows furrow in united confusion. You don’t let that deter you from continuing, your arms gesturing haphazardly at the whiteboard. “Secondly, this is hands-down one of the worst brainstorms I have ever seen. This is not cohesive in the fucking slightest. Garrick, mark me.”

Kyle chokes on his spit, his brain short-circuiting before he sees your fingers wiggling at one of the markers he’s holding. The sergeant promptly gives it to you.

Your free hand takes turns pointing at everyone else in the room, a verbal command of, “sit down” directed at each man also. Dumbly and cautiously they all do. Ghost places himself at the end of the couch nearest the entrance, John strategically chooses a spot between yourself and the kitchen, and Soap and Gaz sit closest to you, where the two of them can hear you muttering under your breath as you draw what appears to be a massive cloud shape in the middle of the board.

Once completed, you fill your shape in with the word ‘TARGET’ and slam your free hand against the board. No one flinches, but if one were to look closely there would be some eyes widening in response. Johnny swears he sees one of your eyelids twitch.

“So,” you call out, “what do we know about the target?”

There are not only wide eyes looking at you, there are full glances exchanged between your audience.

“Seeing as you had the nerve to not invite me in your little meeting while keeping me on overtime” - Kyle and John squirm at that, and your finger makes a little circle - “we are going to be working on this project together. With all due respect, I’m not asking.”

Surely not…

And it’s when Captain John Price reviews the writing left over from the others that he realises Kyle and Johnny did one thing right during their clusterfuck of a coverup.

They managed to erase your name.

… you have absolutely no idea you are the target.

A piece of writing far in the coroner catches your attention, and your shoulders slump. “The target likes knitting and ‘The Karate Kid’. In another life we would have been the best of friends.” A dramatic sigh leaves you, “Oh well, at least I’ll be able to give you some insight into the mindset of this individual. Any questions?”

Four hands shoot up.

Rubbing your hands together with glee, a maniac smile grows on your face. “Excellent.”

#dark!141 #poly 141 #darkfic #task force 141 x reader #dark task force 141 x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #john price x reader #johnny mactavish x reader #sergeant kyle gaz garrick x reader #cod x female reader #female reader #cloudypariah writes

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copper-dragon-in-disguise · 4 months

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Could you do me a favor and tell me literally every piece of info abt dnd you can? Asking for an aster

@amethyst-aster (just so you see it)

hello!

so. this is long which is why there is a cut. i feel i ought to foreworn you that i read the entire players handbook cover to cover the summer i turned 11 because i was lonely and autistic. i memorized it (mostly. little rusty on some of the magic rules but whatever). /not sarcastic so! this is EXTREMELY LONG.

first up! your basics:

dungeons and dragons is a tabletop roleplaying game first created in 1974 by gary gygax. that's not so important. what is important is this: it is currently in its fifth edition (shorthanded as 5e). that is the one i know the most about and it is personally the one i think is the easiest to play, but thats my own preference. my biology teacher thinks 5e is bloody stupid and he plays the second edition (2e), which i find much harder and more limiting.

There are three core rulebooks, and a number of supplementary books.

The most important of those three (and the only one you need to know, really, unless you're the one running the game) is called The Player's Handbook (PHB). It contains the rules for building a character and playing them.

Because it will run you upwards of $50USD per copy, here is a pdf of it on archive dot org.

The other two is the Monster Manuel (MM) (a book of all the monsters in the game) and the Dungeon Master's Guide (DMG) (a book of how to run a game, but you don't need it as a player). They are here and here.

There are a number of d&d youtubers who have tutorial videos on this type of thing. my favorite is Ginny Di, but there are literally dozens out there.

BASIC TERMS

A Character sheet is the thing you have all the information about your character recorded on. It comes in several variations, but this is a free form fillable pdf version, and this is a free printable (both from the wizards of the coast (wotc) website, but the second is hosted on archive.org) (wotc are the company that owns the copyright to the game).

A class is the vocation of the character. its what they do with themselves, but its not necessarily a job.

A race is the character's species. this is also called their species, but in offical material you'll see it called their race.

A background is how their past shaped the character.

A backstory is that past.

Ability scores are the abilities of the character, they are determined with dice rolls. There are six of them, and many years ago someone explained them with tomatoes and that's still the easiest way to explain them in my opinion. You figure them out by rolling 4d6 and adding up the three highest numbers, for a total of 6 times.

ID in alt text. [I cannot find the original source, I am sorry, nor the graphic's source]

There are various types of dice, conveniently labeled with this image below:

ID in alt. [Source]

The d20 is the most important; its what you'll use to roll ability checks and saving throws and etc.

If you don't have your own physical dice (they are advalible online, at barnes & nobles, and at your local gaming store, but many people don't have a local gaming store (me)), you can roll them on many websites. My preferred one is this one, but any work. Google has its own built in, too.

MAKING A CHARACTER

So. You have your dice, now what?

Now you make a character sheet! there are many videos online explaining how to do this (there is a lovely one here and here), but i'm going to explain it here how I generally do it.

Step 0- OPTIONAL:

Take your character sheet, and come up with an idea. Who do you want to play? A gay disaster who can shapeshift? a hobbit? a chaotic ginger with too many cats and a habit of making deals with eldritch powers? You can be whatever the hell you want. alternatively, you can look at the options in the PHB first, and go from there.

Step 1- Pick a race/species.

There are well over 30 of these, and I'm not listing them all. But the ones advaliable in the player's handbook are as follows:

Dwarf. Your sterotypical mining, axe wielding, beared fantasy dwarf. ex: Gimli, in Lord of the Rings

ID in alt. [Source]

Elf. Traditionally depicted as tall, graceful, and living in the woods. Generally have pointed ears. ex. Legolas in Lord of the Rings.

ID in alt text. [Source]

Halfling. Literally just renamed hobbits, so they don't get sued. Known for being short and excellent cooks. ex. Frodo, Sam, Merry, & Pippin from Lord of the Rings. (I can't seperate them, it feels wrong)

ID in alt. [Source]

Human. We all know what humans are. Generally viewed as very adaptable species in d&d! also in real life. ex. Bill Nye the Science Guy.

ID in alt. [Source]

Dragonborn. A bipedal species descended from dragons. They're cool as shit. ex. I literally cannot think of one i'm sorry.

ID in alt. [Source]

Gnome. Known for being very tinkery, small, and causing mischief. Also, for some reason, for being in gardens. ex. Pike Trickfoot from Critical Role.

ID in alt text. [Source]

Half-elf. Half elf, half something else! They generally have a lot of angst, but not always. Sometimes people say they combine the best of both worlds (elf and human), and sometimes people say they have it really shitty. ex. Keyleth from critical role.

ID in alt. [Source]

Half-Orc. half orc, half something else! I dunno really how to describe them. ex. Fjord Lavorre from Critical Role

ID in alt. [Source]

Tiefling. A humanoid species with horns and a tail, and often brightly colored skin. Extremely Gender in my opinion.

Step 2- Pick a class.

There are 12 core classes, and one more added in a later book. I'll go over all 13!

ARTIFICER. A magical tinkerer. A bit like leo valdez in pjo? Their core stat is intelligence. In my opinion they're very complicated for a first character ever, but do what you want its your game i do not care.

BARBARIAN. If you want to wear no armor, have an axe (or other weapon), and charge into battle shouting, this is the class for you! its fun and decently simple for first time players, in my opinion. Core stat is Strength (and constitution).

BARD. Someoe who uses the magic of creation to do shit. Also known for seducing anything that moves, but that's optional. Core stat is charisma. Seems simple at first, but they have a lot of spells to manage at later levels, but they're not too hard. The main guy in the d&d movie is one.

CLERIC. They're healers and warriors. Generally have got some sort of divine magic, but don't necessarily have to. Semi-difficult? I haven't ever played one, so I don't know how easy it would be for a first character ever. Main stat is wisdom.

DRUID. Person who turns into animals and respects the enviroment. Basically, the lorax, but less orange and with more turning into animals (druid lovers out there i am sorry for saying y'all are the lorax please don't come after me with pitchforks). they're okay for a first character but they can be a little confusing. Main stats are wisdom (and constitution).

FIGHTER. Someone who fights things. The most basic of the d&d classes, and one of the simplest for first time players, probably, but I haven't ever played one so who knows. Main stats are strength or dexterity.

MONK. Person who punches people a lot. Like Aang from avatar: the last airbender. Main stats are dexterity and wisdom. They seem simple, but one of the mechanics is slightly confusing, but they're still really simple.

PALADIN. Your tradition knight. A guy (gender neutral) in plate armor with a horse and loyalty issues. I love playing paladins so much, they're great. Personally I think they're a little confusing. Main stats are Strength & Charisma.

RANGER. Someone who wanders through the forest and fights things, like strider (but not like aragorn) from lotr. Core stats are wisdom and strength. My first ever character was an elf ranger named Thia Nailo. She was awesome. Rangers can also have pet panthers and shit, and sometimes small dragons (not tiny dragons, though. Like horse sized dragons).

ROGUE. A thief. My second ever character, and the first one who I played for any significant length of time (thia's campaign died out) was a half-elf rogue named Enna Helder-Kromlin. Rogues are a really good class for first time players, I feel like. Core stat is dexterity.

SORCERER. Someone born with magic. Main stat is charisma. They can be a little complicated.

WARLOCK. Someone who made a deal with some sort of higher power (eldritch being, god(s), etc) for magic. they make bad decisions for a living and its awesome. my favorite ever character was an elf warlock named Mara. Her patron lived in a shield and she had a wisdom of 5 but a charisma of 20. Core stat is charisma.

WIZARD. Gandalf. Someone who studied magic and learned it that way. Main stat is intelligence. They can get really complicated, really fast, but they're still a viable option for your first time.

Step 3- Backstory

There are other things to do, but its late and i'm tired. What you need to do from here is figure out what your character's life was like before now. Or, if you dont want to, then get a vibe for their personality or something.

NOW WHAT?

When you have a character, your DM (Dungeon master, the person running the game, the ''narrator'') will give you scenario, and you roleplay your way through it.

Literally anything can happen. It's d&d. the rules are suggestions, not actual rules. Make it what you want it to be!!!!

If you have other questions please contact me I love them even if it takes me forever to answer them sometimes.

#d&d #dungeons and dragons #asks #amethyst aster

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pancakeke · 5 months

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I wrote a bunch of paragraphs about nothing in particular again so here it is under a readmore so it doesn't take up space.

like 8 years ago when people used tumblr more via desktop browser than its app, I put a 3rd party metric tracker in my desktop theme that logged how people were referred to my blog. it also captured what pages of my blog people viewed.

at one point during this time I reblogged a piece of pixel art from a japanese artist. they came to my blog through their activity page, and then searched my blog in a couple different ways for the terms "ドット" and "ドット絵" ("dot" and "dot art", as in pixel art). I checked those search urls myself to see if they found anything but there were no results because I never used those terms or specifically tagged pixel art in any other way.

ever since then I've made an effort to tag all pixel art I reblog with the term "pixel art". that artist was probably hoping to find more art to check out and it bums me out that my tagging system wasn't thorough enough to help.

this is why I have my current specific tag system lol. it keeps evolving but having the ability to find stuff you're into without jumping through hoops is really handy. (the site-wide post and tag searches return sooo much bullshit. it's a slog sifting through thr noise whenever I use those to fill my queue due to the sheer amount of manga caps, polls, liveblogs, personal posts, and fics posted without readmores...)

if only the way to view all tags you've ever used still worked. I think it caps at 500 or 1000 now and is also chronological so the first 500 or whatever tags you ever used show up in the list. then there's a hard stop and it does not update as you delete posts or use that mass tag editor to remove certain tags for your blog entirely.

I went through my used tag list earlier this year to unify certain tags and remove tags that I stopped using in favor for other ones, but I only got like 400 tagged terms down the list. maybe downloading my blog data would show more. the trick I mentioned uses your desktop blog's archive page. the tags are in its code so you can use "inspect element" to view it. I remember scrolling a lot to load a bunch of posts on the page but cant remember if this was required or I just did it to see if I could access more tags.

it's formatted all fucked and hard to manage but you can copy and paste the long chunk of tags into one cell of a spreadsheet and then use Data options to split them into columns by commas (or whatever punctuation separates them, I forget). a wide list is a huge pain to view so from there you can click on a cell containing data, click ctrl+a to highlight all data in thr row, copy, then paste special as "transposed" to turn the copied row 90° so it pastes as a column. the spreadsheet will wide as fuck from the hundreds of columns so honestly its easier to paste the transposed data into a new tab and delete the original vs clicking in the column to the left of your transposed data and then pressing ctrl+ shift+right arrow to select all rows to the right, then deleting the extra rows.

if you're in Excel you may have to use the "delete rows" option from the "home" tab and then save the sheet using "file > save" (do NOT save via the save button on the upper left corner or ctrl+s). this returns the sheet to a manageable size for scrolling (plus reduces its file size). this piece of shit software usually retains the sheet width/length even after you delete hundreds of columns/rows unless you use this trick of deleting specifically via home tab + saving specifically through the save menu.

I got a round number of tags when I did this which makes me think there's a cutoff.

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sungbeam · 2 years

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Hii so sorry for bothering you but, I love writing I’ve been doing it for a long time. I’d like to post on tumblr but I’m kinda new to it and don’t really know how to use it (gifs, text colors,…) so if it’s okay for you could you maybe teach me how to use it or give me some tips?

HELLO HELLO!!! omg i'm so flattered PLS TT but that's so great to hear that u want to start posting here and join the community!! :D i'll try to make a comprehensive, basic guide, but i'm def not the best with the technical things like color gradients and the like 😅 so if u wanted to explore about that, there r a lot of other blogs here who can show u!

besides that, i'll put below the cut my two cents, and anyone can feel free to add if i forgot anything!:

1. gifs! i'm gonna say right off the bat that i don't use gifs a lot, if not, at all. but there r a lot of gifs on tumblr that u can find and use!! usually if u search up the thing u want a gif of, u could probably find it, but pls remember to credit someone if u use their gif!! and if they ask u to like/rb their post if u save it, then pls respect that as well!!

2. text colors: ngl, they're really sparse and a little ugly 😅😅 at least the ones tumblr provides, so a lot of people either just stick to the plain text color or they go on desktop and do the fancy custom coloring w hex numbers and things. i really don't know how to do that (?) but again, if u ever want to learn, i can point u to someone who can show u! but at some points, i do like using the text colors one at a time to make things stand out more against the plain text! to use the colors, just select the text accordingly and u can press a color or press it again to undo it

that's what it looks like on my end! ^

3. text fonts: personally, tumblr's method of doing this is really annoying sjxbksnfh but you can change the font of an entire paragraph without selecting it. the font button is the "Aa" in the left corner above ur keyboard. u essentially have to just click thru until u figure out which one you'd like depending on the aesthetic ur going for! a lot of people ik here just use this regular text in the three different sizes, or they go to like,, copy paste generators online and find a font they like their instead! i do use those frequently, so lmk if you'd like the link to the one i use!

4. tags: one of the most important ways to get ur works out into the world esp when ur just starting off is thru the tags! to tag ur fic, it's the hashtag symbol to the right above ur keyboard. u wanna use tags that pertain to ur fic, so try avoiding tagging ur fic w things its not (like if it's angst, don't put fluff). some common things i tag my fics w are "(group/idol) x reader" "(group/idol) drabbles" "(group/idol) social media au" etc. and usually if it's a pretty known/used tag, it'll appear while ur typing it in as well!

5. navigation menus: writers here usually have a pinned post or a post w a link to a "navigation" post or masterlist! i have my navi pinned, but it essentially is a central place where i link everything that i'd like people to see or things readers/other writers would want to find! things that include: masterlists, about me, faqs, recently posted works, etc!

6. fic formatting: it's unfortunate, but a lot of readers r put off by some types of formatting, which is why a lot of people stick to plain text color and plain text font. usually, u wanna include the title, the idol pairing, word count, genre, and any warnings abt the fic. none of these r required, ofc, but i recommend it! and most people do prefer that if ur fic is over 500 words, that u should out a "keep reading" bar after a paragraph or two! a keep reading bar is like the one i used at the beginning of this post, and u just go to a new line and type ":readmore:" and press enter, and it'll form for u! some people use pictures as a little border as well btwn their intro section and the actual fic.

if u have additional questions, feel free to send in another ask or thru dms and i can walk u thru any of this!

i'm sure i'm missing other important things haha but when in doubt, take inspo from all the other creators around u! pls do remember to reblog people's fics when u read them tho — that's one if the most important things!

(just thought of this and adding, but try to avoid writing directly onto tumblr TT usually i do it on google docs first and copy-paste it onto here to do formatting! tumblr likes to delete things out of pocket sometimes so 💀)

#sungbeam strikes again #yangjungwonforsure #lovely hearing from u!!#a Guide™#hopefully this is helpful skcnsknf

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faction-art · 7 months

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Image credit : Eksovichea Tito Hak

...whilst sat in an unconverted dusty dusty attic... the makeshift desktop setup.

Ableton Live 12 already on the verge of being rolled out?!!

I already dropped a stack on an Ableton 11 activation having used some form of pirated version with each new update and release of it since version 4 of Ableton live, and my Ableton laptop machine has been running infinitely smoother for it since with far less anomalous glitches (such as abnormally high CPU loads, erratic CPU load spikes, and fluctuations, entire project files going missing, at times even entire batches of project files, however, subtle modifications appear to be still happening to my projects when I come back to work on, or review saved projects that I'd made previously, even after only a few minutes to a few hours, which I guess are actually useful more than annoying this time round 🤔...but that's besides the point, since adding pressure variance to a laid down midi drum pattern/sequence is something I could have easily done myself). Thousands of projects later, the past 16 years of constant issues in some form with it has been quite, an ordeal when looking back having just thought about it properly just now.

I'm not running anything fancy hardware-wise, since its a second hand bought Dell Latitude 5491 running on an 8th generation Intel i7 8850H, and 16GB of RAM. Yeah, significantly well behind the 14th generation Intel curve, and most certainly well behind Apple's M1 for performance, let alone the vastly more capable M2, or M3! It's like a constant uphill struggle trying to streamline my Latitude 5491 machine, and keep it running smoothly, and fast, where I have to keep tweaking, and checking it constantly under the hood, which does make me seriously consider considering getting a Macbook Pro for the first time ever, which I've been trying to avoid doing doing to the insane cost of it. Additionally a fair number of the windows updates seem to constantly impact on system performance, and undo a lot of the performance improvement tweaks for my windows laptop DAW, which I don't have anything installed to other than Ableton live 11.

However word has it that version 12 of Ableton Live is imminent (which will no doubt probably be just in time for the release of windows 12 too), not but a month after myself finally personally getting a legit full version of Live 11 suite... Great 😵‍💫. Apparently it's got a bunch of new generative features for creating melodies, as well as some new interface tweaks, and some new colour scheme options. I doubt that I'll be personally moving over to 12, unless someone's willing to send me a copy of it, or I come into money, as it's still a wince inducing 700 to 750 quid for the full suite version when 12 finally lands. Since having used a legit version, of Ableton Live, I can't believe how much better it runs overall than the various pirated versions I've used, with far less project run issues, and at lower CPU loads too, I guess I'll see in the coming months if that remains constant, and hopefully it should fix all the screw ups, and project file anomalies on all my created, and saved projects that I'd encountered during the past 15 years too from here on out.

In any case aside from that, within the interim, anyone with a legit registered copy of version 9, 10, or 11 can sign up for the beta of 12 via the Ableton website, although acceptance for the Ableton live 12 beta testing program is an entirely different matter I guess.

I'd even suggest getting a pirated copy of 12 for testing if you can get a hold of one, although I wouldn't personally recommend doing all your serious work in it at this stage if you do. The only problem with doing that though is that Ableton tend to sneak in features in their new builds versions that do generally become indispensable once you incorporate it into you project/music creation workflow, which is why I won't be using 12 seriously until I have some means of actually running a full legit copy of 12 at this stage.

#ableton live 12 on the way.#ableton 12 beta #ableton #Ableton #Ableton Live

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sunriseinorbit · 2 years

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i have thoughts about sonic frontiers and nowhere to put them, so i am throwing them under a read more on tumblr dot com that you are free to peruse if you so desire!

okay i know it's going to sound like i'm complaining, so i want to stress first that i enjoyed this game a lot, as you can probably tell! there's a lot of good here, and at the very least, i would definitely consider it a step in the right direction. however. the honeymoon phase is waning.

thought number 1: sega hire this man

a lot of people have said that this game needed more time in the oven, and while i do agree with that, i think the thing it needed most was more people. i don't remember how many people worked on this game, but it is a massive step up from forces and deserved a much larger team to match. while it may not have solved the conceptual problems with the game (which i promise i will get to) it definitely would have softened the technical blow, because as it stands, and as i'm sure anyone who's played the game has noticed, there are a lot of technical issues, particularly with 3d-2d transitions just not working. (also maybe it would have given us more complete 4th and 5th islands but that's a discussion for

thought number 2: rhea island

rhea island is the point in the game where it became very obvious that sonic team ran out of time, money, or (more likely) both. and that makes me sad because rhea island could have been so cool as the spot where the tension in the story reaches its peak, and here's just a few ideas for how i would have made it better:

have something to do between the towers. maybe you have to unlock the map to figure out where the next tower is. maybe you have to go through a maze or do another challenge to find the next tower. maybe you have to do a miniboss rush. literally anything would be better than what we have right now.

DYNAMIC MUSIC. rhea and ouranos island only have one music track each where the other islands had seven, and rhea could have used it the most. with every tower you find out something new about the ancients and sonic gets closer to death, i would have loved to see the music reflect that somehow.

something at the end. my personal pick would be end of the world from sonic 06 but good, where tails, knuckles, amy, and possibly sage go through a cyber space gauntlet to save sonic, but i also don't know how that would work gameplay/playstyle wise.

thought number 3: sonic frontiers would be a better game if cyber space just straight up was not in it

i don't know if that's a hot take, but i was watching somecallmejohnny's review and he mentioned that he enjoyed the little platforming challenges (not the memory token stuff, like the part on ares island where you have to go over the water to get to knuckles) more than cyber space, which is something i totally agree with. not only because in those challenges you have your open zone speed upgrades, but because they directly address the elephant in the room when it comes to cyber space, which is what this section is entirely about:

the recycling of old level content is absolutely fucking ridiculous. i could forgive reusing level aesthetics if they were from something we'd never seen before (and since cyber space is supposed to be running through memories, it would have been cool to revisit something new) but no, it's just green hill, chemical plant, and sky sanctuary with reused generations assets to match (and most of the city levels don't show up until ouranos). i do not want to see green hill zone ever again.

but frontiers threw something new into the mix with reused level layouts and geometry, and i don't think that's inherently bad. i think calling back to specific set pieces or iconic chunks of old levels could be really cool, like circling the tower to get up to the rocket in metal harbor. however, i think the key is doing it in moderation, which frontiers does not do. because they will just copy entire levels. granted, i didn't notice a lot of the reused levels my first time playing, but that doesn't change how blatant they are.

and i think it's especially egregious when combined with the reused aesthetics, because some of these levels are copied from their sonic generations counterparts. and they use generations graphics and assets. at that point, why am i not just playing generations? i'm definitely not playing the cyber space levels for the physics!

i really think they should have just put the energy they used for cyber space into just making more interesting challenges and stuff in the overworld, because i had a lot of fun with the stuff that was already there and as much as i enjoyed the levels, on a conceptual level cyber space feels like a holdover from the forces era and sticks out like a sore thumb.

#sonicblogging #sonic frontiers spoilers #i don't even know if this makes sense but i have been spinning this game around in my head like a microwave for the past 2 weeks

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analyticstraininghub · 2 years

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Google Docs - A Brief Introduction & Features | Updated 2023 |

A Brief Introduction of Google Docs:-

In the field of admin, sales & marketing a lot of information is shuttled to and from multiple points between sometimes the same firm or sometimes between multiple endpoints.

Where a lot of data might be added or removed from the content by a number of users resulting in a zillion copies of similar content moving between various points, thus sometimes ending up creating chaos in order.

Google in October of 2012 came up with a solution for sharing and being able to edit this data among several users without the need of sharing the file with multiple sources.

Google provided a platform where a particular file could be edited, commented upon, or just viewed by a number of people at the same time or as per the convenience of the user at any time of day, month, or year.

This revolutionary feature was called Google Docs and a dedicated platform for Google Docs was made available in the summer of 2014 for the general public.

Google Docs is a complimentary internet-based application in which documents and spreadsheets can be created, edited, and stored on Google drive which is a cloud server featured by Google.

Documents can be imported to any computer with Internet connectivity with a google web browser.

As mentioned above, Google Docs is a part of a comprehensive package of online applications offered by Google.

Google Docs Features

Google Docs gives its users the choice to create, edit, update, and import/export documents and spreadsheets in several different fonts and file formats while combining text with formulas, lists, tables, and images as well.

Google Docs is adaptable with almost all presentation software and word processor applications for effective processing.

Any work which is executed on Google Docs can be published as a web page or as a print-ready manuscript at any given point in time.

Google Docs offers access to those who can view, comment or edit their work.

It has become an ideal choice for publishing within an enterprise, organization maintaining blogs, or composing work that can be viewed or edited by multiple users at one go.

Google Docs works on collaborative projects

Google Docs works perfectly for collaborative projects in which multiple authors work together in real-time from geographically diverse locations and making it easier for them to work on one platform.

Hence, all participants can see who made specific document changes and when those alterations were done.

Is Google Drive Safe for Our Data

Since documents are stored online and can also be stored on users’ drives or computers, therefore, there is no risk of total data loss as a result of a localized disaster.

However, Google Docs which requires Internet access as its base feature has given rise to concerns from some authors about their work being open to the public domain and not being private and secure.

But Google has promised their users of the security protocols in place in order to ensure the safety & security of the data being worked upon by the users of Google Docs.

How Google Docs work ?

What is Cloud Computing?

Cloud computing is a networked computer system that uses the resources of several servers to complete tasks and store data which is shaping up to be the next big trend in the computing industry where the entire enterprise relies on data and is driven by the same.

Traditionally, with the commencement of the data revolution in the 21st century there were only a few people who could access the processing power of a supercomputer.

With the new era of cloud computing, practically anyone or any organization could tap into the cloud server to gain access to that sort of computing power.

Where I can save my personal Data On the Computer

Since the launch and use of the personal computer, users have been storing information either on an external storage device like a compact disc or on a computer’s hard drive, or on the system’s hard drive.

We as users have been programmed in a way so as to purchase new pieces of equipment or upgrade old ones whenever applications require more processing power than our current systems can provide.

the cloud service provider is responsible for securing?

Thus, cloud computing has taken over the responsibility of storage and processing power which falls back to the network and not the individual computer owner. Thus, providing additional storage space and opportunities for future enhancements.

Although if we compare internet computing then it’s a relatively young industry, still there are many companies that offer cloud computing services. One of the major companies is Google.

This Internet giant offers a G-suite of Web-based productivity applications under the name Google Docs, it will allow the users to utilize applications to the best of their potential.

is Google Docs Easy To Use

The advantage is to make the procedures easier and simpler.

Google has also made sure that applications or tools aren’t as complex or comprehensive as the leading desktop counterparts, they have other advantages over traditional software.

The features of these advantages would be that the applications aren’t tied to a specific computer.

Therefore, Google doesn’t want users to download and install the software on a particular machine to access the software or the file.

This goes to prove that any operating system or computer connected to the Internet can access Google Docs.

Since each of the users saves information to the cloud system, then he or she can access the same file from anywhere.

Users don’t have to look and opt for a specific version of a document that is the most current — it will always be saved in the Google cloud as it is.

new Google Docs features to try in 2023

Another advantage of Google Docs would be live access to multiple users. The function will enable users to make edits, comment, or just view the same files all at the same time.

This feature is known as online collaboration, and it helps streamline teamwork over the internet.

Since Google Docs preserve earlier versions of the documents being worked on, users would not have any reasons to worry about any data being irrevocably changed in a file.

Collaborating on files might change the way we think about document management. But it also means that the project managers can save time and effort.

Here are a few of the many tools that will help you get more out of Google’s free data processing app:-

Google Docs is packed with powerful tools are Below:

1. Voice recognition rather than typing

For times when the user wishes to utilize the voice input feature rather than type in the entire content. Google Docs’ voice typing tool is a must try.

To access the feature from the toolbar go to an open document, go to Tools > Voice typing.

A small window with a large microphone image will pop up along the right edge of the page that the user can click to toggle between switching voice typing on and off.

Voice typing is available only in Google docs. It’s an acquired taste, but the client can also use voice typing to edit and format text in Google Docs.

2. Clear formatting

When the user pastes a slab of content in Google Docs, the font and font size are most likely to vary from the rest of the text. To make it match the rest of the content, highlight the text and perform one of these three actions:

Right-click the selected text and click Clear formatting

Go to Format > Clear formatting

Choose Normal text from the pull-down menu below the Format menu options.

3. Additional fonts

From the drop down menu of the toolbar of the document, choose More fonts to add new fonts to this menu.

There are a number of fonts that are available which the user can choose from.

To get a better idea of how different fonts might look, check out Google Fonts where users can view sample liners of each font.

The user may click into each sample sentence and change it according to their own needs.

When the user finds the font they prefer, the user just needs to search for its name from the fonts pull-down menu in Google Docs and it is automatically added to your list.

4. Suggestion mode

When a user is working on a shared document, then he/she can change the edit mode so that Google Docs tracks changes unlike Microsoft Word.

Google doc can also help the users to perform editing whilst allowing their collaborators to accept or reject them.

Click on the drop down arrow next to the pencil icon in the upper-right corner of the document and choose the Suggesting option.

Now, as the user edits the document, changes will show as color-coded suggestions with a comment next to each to show who made the changes, which helps in transparency and avoids confusion with the click of a button.

5. Tag someone in a comment

If any of the users wishes to draw someone’s attention with a comment, he/she may tag collaborators by either entering the @ or + sign and choose the person who they want to tag.

He or she will then get a notification or an email if the person tagged is not online to alert them about the comment or question.

6. Bookmark more, scroll less

For long documents, adding bookmarks means less scrolling. In Google Docs Go to Insert > Bookmark to add a bookmarking to the document.

A minute, blue bookmark icon will be added to the left edge of the document and It will show that the page/document has been bookmarked.

7. Offline mode

The user doesn’t necessarily need an Internet connection to use Google Docs, though it is required to be connected when setting up offline use (along with Chrome).

From the main screen of Google Drive:

Select the gear image in the upper-right corner and choose Settings.

Throw the switch to the right in the Offline section for “Create, open and edit your recent Google Doc files on this device while offline.”

With the offline mode turned on, you will be able to view and edit the Docs, Sheets, Slides and Drawings till the next time users connect to the Internet.

Any changes made in the offline mode will be automatically saved until the internet connectivity resumes.

8. Rolling down own substitutions

Go to Tools > Preferences and they will see a list of automatic substitutions that Google Docs makes.

Most involve the style in which fractions are displayed along with a few symbols and arrow styles.

Users can add their own, but substitutions based on the capitalization of a word does not work.

9. Right-click for research

To swiftly look up the definition of a word, right-click on the word and choose Define.

A small panel appears to the right of the document with the definition of the word, along with synonyms, letting the user obtain information without leaving Google Docs.

Similar to that function, right-click on a word and choose Research to perform a quick Google search in the right-panel.

Any links click will open in a new tab, although the user can drag images from the search results from the right panel directly into his/her document.

10. Revision history

How To return to an earlier version of Google

If the client/user would like to return to an earlier version of Google Doc, they can do so by going to File > See revision history.

From the drop-down File panel, they would be able to see a chronological list of time-stamped versions of the document.

Choose any one and select it to restore that version of the revision to open it.

One can always go back to revision history and choose a previous version to be able to return to the latest edits with the previously copied data.

There is no way to lose changes using revision history; choosing an earlier version just moves it to the top of their revision history list.

Conclusion

With these many features, the user has the opportunity to explore the freedom and capacity to perform multiple collaborative tasks without the loss of any data.

Google Docs comes loaded with many features, the motive of it is to make collaborative editing of data a worry of the past and help its users to attempt and plan the major implementation of this segment in their day-to-day personal and professional lives.

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#what is google docs used for #what is the use of google docs for students #what is google docs and google sheets #What is google docs

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nifolution · 2 years

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Love and Lies 1

Pairing: Steve Rogers & Reader (short)

Summary: Steve just wants someone to love him, not Captain America.

Warning: Fluff, Angst, Steve is a lonely idiot

A/N: This is a revised copy of my oc fic. It is still written in 3rd person. No stealing, no reposts, no translations, no feeding to AIs. Comments, reblogs and likes are always welcome and appreciated.

Series Masterlist Main Masterlist

Chapter 1

Steve hadn’t realized how much he had changed over the last decade. He’d seen too much, been through too much and couldn’t force himself back into the past. No matter how much he wanted to.

He didn't anticipate how he would feel when he made the impulsive decision to stay there. He knew his return to the past would hurt his friends, but he thought he was doing the right thing. That he deserved to live a happy normal life. They would eventually understand that and forgive him.

His initial reunion with Peggy had been emotional and passionate. He was certain he made the right decision. He could finally live the life he imagined before going into the ice… It took her less than a day to realize he wasn't her Steve. It took longer for him to admit she wasn't his Peggy. Maybe she never was.

Still, they tried. For nearly a year they were together, but in the end it didn't work out. He couldn’t be who she needed him to be. He missed the people he left behind, and those he never properly mourned. And re-adapting to his old life proved to be its own hardship. He didn’t belong there anymore. With her blessing, he came home.

---------------

There were mixed reactions when he reappeared on the platform a whole 20 minutes after he was supposed to. Banner was relieved, having frantically struggled the entire time to retrieve him. He felt bad about that. Sam acted nonchalant about it, but he could see the worry lingering in his eyes. Bucky was confused and angry. He knew of Steve’s intentions and wasn’t sure how to feel about seeing him back.

Looking at Bucky, Steve felt overwhelming guilt gnaw at him. He uselessly hurt his best friend. And he hurt the others too, even if they didn't realize the how or the why. He had a lot to make up for.

Shortly after returning, Steve announced his retirement. He passed the shield to Sam who earned the title Captain America. Without a doubt he knew that Sam was the right person to take his place.

Steve was tired. He was done fighting. He wanted a life, a family, some semblance of normalcy. He continued living at the compound until he found a place of his own. Spent the next few months making amends with the people in his life. Even if all save one realized it.

He was finally ready to start this new chapter as just Steve Rogers, 106 year old retiree looking for love.

Sam tried to get him into online dating. It was confusing to him but he was willing to try. After downloading multiple apps, and seeing all the available women, he felt confident he would find the one. However, he mostly received angry messages about his ‘fake Captain America profile.’

He then tried going to bars, which showed promise. He never left without a pocketful of numbers. He went on a lot of dates, but never the right kind. Some of the women treated the date like a prime time interview, wanting to know every detail about him, his suits, his battles. Others were fans that were either too starstruck to speak or worse, fawned over him the entire night. Then there were those that he quickly realized were only after the fame of dating Captain America. One date flung herself into traffic just so he could save her. Or the many that only wanted to hook up with an avenger. They all wanted a piece of him. They all wanted Captain America. No one wanted Steve. Not a single woman even tried getting to know the man behind the superhero. Months went by with Steve getting more lonely and frustrated.

---------------

Steve had an idea. He was babysitting Morgan, watching one of her many Disney movies, and it hit him. The prince didn't find love until his appearance changed for the worse. Maybe that's what he needed to do. Turning into a talking animal was a bit extreme, but there were other options. And he knew just the person to make it happen. Sam and Bucky were away on a mission for a few weeks. This was the opportunity to try something crazy.

---------------

The next morning, Steve arrived at the New York Sanctum. Strange sat across from him looking bored with his presence. “What can I do for you Captain Rogers?”

Steve nervously ran his fingers through his hair before speaking. “I need a favor. I'm hoping it won’t be too much trouble. I want to get married.”

“Congratulations,” he deadpanned.

“No. I haven't even found anyone yet and that's the problem. All this,” gestures to his body, “is a distraction. I want to make a real connection. You see I was watching this movie about a frog prince.”

Strange laughed, “You want the sorcerer to turn you into a frog, how original.”

“That’s not what I'm asking.”

“I won’t make you a love spell.” Strange crossed his arms and glared at Steve.

Steve scooted to the edge of his chair. “No that’s not… I was hoping you could use a spell to make me look like my former self. Before I was Captain America.”

Strange was intrigued. “You want me to reverse the serum? Why?”

“You misunderstand. I just want something to make me look the way I used to, temporarily. I want to use my old smaller body to weed out the flings and find someone to love Steve, not Cap.”

“I see.” Strange inhaled deeply and stood up. “I can put a simple glamour on you today. Let you be seen as your former self for a few hours.”

Steve shook his head. “It needs to be longer. I need time to woo a woman. Have her love me for me. If my history is any indication, it may take awhile.”

Strange mulled this over quietly. “I can offer you a spell that will last 90 days. It will turn you into the smaller version of yourself, but only in appearance. You will still have your serum induced abilities. For obvious reasons you will have to pretend not to. I will be unable to reverse the spell once it starts. It must be allowed to run its course. You would have to assume a new identity if you don’t wish to be caught. I suggest taking some time to think this through. You’d be weaving quite the web of deception. It could end poorly. However if you are certain, I will grant it.”

Steve rose from his seat and approached Strange. “It’s perfect. Let’s do it.”

Chapter 2

#steve rogers x you #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x y/n #steve rogers fluff #pre serum steve #steve rogers angst #steve rogers series

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seokjinsdisciple · 2 years

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between the pages

summary: you and namjoon had dated for a few years before life drew you apart. years later, you’re skyrocketed to the bestseller list as your first book gets released. and who’s book sits next to yours in the bestsellers display? namjoon’s does. will this be your second chance at a perfect love?

warnings: its very fluffy to be honest, theres probably language, all the poems are credited at the end of this post bc i cannot write poetry to save my life. so.. yeah

WC: 4k

UNEDITED SORRY

You hunched over your laptop, blanket covering your shoulders as your fingers typed furiously on the keyboard. You were so close to finishing your first novel, a romance. You were pretty proud of it if you were honest with yourself. It had taken you years. The only thing that had kept you going all of this time was the memories of your childhood sweetheart that you got to relive as your words danced across the page as you wrote.

“In the end, it was always you. It is only in your eyes that I can see my whole world.”

You smiled, clasping your hands over where Monie’s hands cupped your face. You were exhilarated, heart racing from your chest as he leaned down. The moment you had waited so long for was here, and as his lips gently touched yours, your world exploded into color.

You know you looked silly, a gremlin over your laptop with a grin that you couldn’t shake off of your face. You remembered that day like it was yesterday, the start of something so incredible between you and Namjoon.

Yours was a whirlwind romance, and it lasted from the beginning of junior year to the end of your sophomore year of college. There wasn’t any bad blood between the two of you, it was more of a right person, wrong time. You loved Namjoon, you still did. He taught you everything about love that mattered. His poetic words set your standards way too high, and his sweet nature didn’t help lower them.

Namjoon was the perfect lover. Always giving, thoughtful, intelligent and handsome. He was everything you could ever want. Hence why your writing centered so completely around him. Every short story, blurb, and even piece of information was inspired by him.

You sighed, letting the wave of bittersweet memories overwhelm your senses. You wrote a quick email to your editor, attaching the final chapters. Then you hit send.

1 YEAR LATER

You stood in front of your book, on display at your local bookstore, under a sign that read: “Newly Released Bestsellers.” Your book was one of many, but that didn’t matter to you at all.

Your hard work paid off, and your book sitting under this sign at your bookstore proved that. Your eyes wandered over to a book that sat right beside yours. Your heart stalled. There in large lettering in the front of the book read the name you had only allowed yourself to remember in your dreams. Kim Namjoon.

You found yourself picking up the book before you could stop yourself. Before you knew it, you were walking out of the bookstore with a copy of Namjoons book tucked under your arm. That night, you read the entire book in one sitting, unable to put it down.

When you reached the end, you had tears streaming down your face. He had written a beautiful love story. Your love story. You grabbed your phone, searching your contacts until you reached his number.

Your finger hovered over the call button, but you couldn’t do it.

It had been too long, and you were just feeling emotional. You couldn’t call him out of the blue like this. But you could stalk him. And you did.

You scoured the internet for anything that could tell you about him, his life, what he was up to. You just wanted to see who he had become. Obviously, you knew he was a writer, but the book he had written about you was one of many books. Unlike you, he had filled the past few years writing as many books as he could. It was no surprise that most of them were poems. He had always been so enamored with writing song lyrics, and they’re one in the same.

You spent a few hours stalking his social media, reading what poetry was posted online and collecting your thoughts. You hated the way you got excited at his relationship status being single, yet you couldn’t stop thinking about the memories you had created together.

“Namjoon!” you giggled, gently hitting his back as he threw you over his shoulder, “Put me down!”

“Don’t yell at me! I’m not the one who broke a glass and am walking around the kitchen with bare feet. I’m just keeping you safe, tulip.”

Your nose scrunched over his back at the use of the nickname. You thought it was corny, but Namjoon loved it. He always explained that tulips symbolized perfect love, so it was only fitting that he called you that. You never won that argument, and you would be lying if you said it didn’t make your heart skip a beat.

Namjoon walked you carefully through your shared apartment, the giggles you couldn’t control growing louder as he threw you gently on the bed. He trapped your body underneath his, pressing a gentle kiss to your nose before returning your smile.

“I think I have to make sure there isn’t a single scratch anywhere on your body,” he whispered, letting his gaze on you intensify until you couldn’t help but squirm.

You felt the ghost touch of his hands on your skin as you reminisced. Letting your fingers run through your hair, just like Namjoon used to do absent-mindedly while he read in the morning. Then you took a deep breath and pulled your laptop onto your lap. The only way you could get through these memories was to write them down.

So you did. Which is exactly how your second book got published.

–

Namjoon had ridden his bike to the bookstore, one of his favorites in town. He loved exploring the new titles that they highlighted, not to mention his writing got discovered at this very bookstore. They were known for selling self-published books of newer authors. After his second book had been published, he had gotten picked up by a publishing company, and his writing became his career.

When he stepped into the bookstore, the familiar ring of the bell above the door sounded. He lifted his hand in a friendly wave as the shop owner said hello from the checkout. Namjoon almost walked past the local bestsellers, until a name from the corner of his eyes made him stop dead in his tracks. It was your name.

He immediately picked the book up, looking through its synopsis and reviews. Your biography on the inner sleeve made him smile. Dimples fully on display, Namjoon took in his surroundings. His most recent book sat next to yours.

“Irene?” He called, holding the book tightly in his grip. “Has this author come in and talked to you yet?”

The shop owner made her way over, taking one glance at the name on the book he was holding before nodding.

“Oh yeah, she was here earlier this morning,” she spoke. Namjoon’s heart thudded in his chest. Had you stopped at the sight of his name just like he had yours. “She actually bought your book.”

Ignoring the knowing smirk from the owner, he grinned.

“Do you two know each other?” She had asked as he paid for your book, dumb grin still plastered on his face.

“Not anymore,” was all he said before walking out of the store towards his bike.

6 MONTHS LATER

This process had been quicker than the last, your book reaching bestseller status before the first week was done. You were proud that something you had poured your soul into the past couple of years had enamored the nation.

You were a little nervous about your book dedication, as you had already received so many questions about who it was about.

As you stood in Target, holding your own book, you flipped to that page.

“To a soulmate who was never meant to be. I love you always.”

It was a ridiculous thing to be nervous about, in fact, you knew that Namjoon would likely never read it. Let alone know it was about him. Although you doubted he could come to any other conclusion.

You were doing press for your new book, and every question seemed to circulate about who your book was dedicated to. You tried to avoid them as gracefully as possible, but it still caught you off guard every time.

“So, you know we would be remiss if we didn’t ask you what all your fans are wondering,” the talk show host started, smiling widely at you before continuing the question, “Who is your dedication about?”

You gave a short, albeit performative, laugh before answering her, “To be quite honest, I’m regretting putting that as the dedication to my book.”

This made the audience laugh, and you returned it with a short chuckle of your own.

“We are dying to know, if he was half of the man you're writing about, he’d be welcome in my house at any time,” the host joked.

“He is exactly like what I’ve written. In fact, I blame him for never having a relationship after him,” you laughed, cheeks warming at what you’d just revealed.

“Well I don’t blame you! If my husband acted like him, I’d never let him go. So why did you?”

“It’s a long story, really,” you answered, mind immediately thrown into memories of that day.

Namjoon closed the door to your apartment quietly, returning from his shift working at the college library later than usual. He figured you were still awake, after all it was finals week and the two of you had been swamped.

It came as no surprise that when he turned the corner into your living room, that you sat on the floor, papers scattered around you as if in some sort of summoning ritual. You were stressed out, he could tell from the way your face was scrunched in concentration. He sat quietly behind you, resting his head on your shoulder and pressing a kiss to your skin.

“We need to talk, tulip,” he sighed, hating the way your body tensed at his words.

“You got the job, didn’t you?” you whispered back, allowing your body to sink back into his.

“Yeah, I did. But I don’t need to take it,” he added, a spiteful laugh forming in you at his words.

“That’s absurd, Joon,” you sighed, “This is your dream job. I will not let you not take it.”

“I know.”

“Ok.”

“So what does that mean for us?” He spoke so quietly you were certain you could hear his heart breaking in his chest. You could definitely hear your own.

“You’re graduating early, moving across the country, we can’t stay together.”

“I know,” he sighed, holding you closer than before, “I love you, tulip.”

“I love you always,” you had replied, unable to hold back your tears.

And just like that, the perfect love you two shared was over. He had moved out the next day, not wanting you to be distracted from your final exams. Which was bullshit to be completely honest. That semester you got the worst final grades that you had ever gotten.

“It was just the right person at the wrong time,” you said, finally answering the host’s question.

–

Namjoon sat scrolling on his phone, not paying attention to the scenery as the bus passed stop after stop. He was, of course, on the way to the bookstore. He wanted to stop there before heading to his publishing house.

He walked casually into the bookstore, eyes immediately betraying him and shooting towards the new local bestsellers section. He didn’t expect you to have another book out so soon, but when he caught your name on the cover of a book he hadn’t seen before. Namjoon would be lying if he said he hadn’t kept up with your published works after reading your first book in one sitting.

It was so easy to read. The way you had crafted each sentence was so eloquent, and made him unable to put it down. It was so clearly about him, that while he had been reading it, he was transported right back to the early days of your relationships. He was so incredibly proud of you, your book had moved him. Plus he knew how hard you had studied in college. He could still see you sitting in the library.

Namjoon grinned as he walked over to where you sat at a round table in the campus library. He had just gotten off of work, and was coming to bother you while you attempted to finish writing a paper that was due the next day. Not that you wouldn’t welcome his distraction.

You grinned back at him as he held up two coffees. He pressed a quick kiss to the top of your head before placing one of the coffees in front of you.

“How’s it going, tulip?” he asked you as he sat down, hand immediately finding yours and fingers intertwining.

You looked so happy, giving his hand a squeeze before answering him.

“It’s ok,” you answered him, “but I wish I didn’t have to write this. I’d much rather start my book.”

“The one about us?” he asked, pleased at himself as his wiggling eyebrows got you to laugh.

“That very one,” you said.

He picked up your new book without a second thought, turning it over like he had done a few months ago and reading the synopsis. He didn’t know why he even bothered, knowing that he was going to walk out with it no matter what the back cover read. And that’s exactly what he did.

He made his way back to the station, waiting for the bus would be much more enjoyable now that he had your most recent work in his tote bag. He pulled your book out, eager to start reading. His heart stopped as he read the dedication page, mind going completely blank as he read those words over and over again.

You dedicated this book to him. He knew it for a fact. The last words you spoke to him right there on that page.

All of a sudden his mind swarmed with ideas. And when he made his way into the meeting with his publisher, the idea for his new book tumbled out of his mouth in hurried excitement.

6 MONTHS LATER

Your hands shook as you stared at the dedication page in front of you. The book you had open was Namjoon’s newest book of poetry. As much as you wanted to delve into the book and read his words, you couldn’t tear yourself away from the very first page.

“To my tulip, who is the only person who I can seem to write about. I assure you when this life ends, and the dust settles, I will find you in the next.”

He had seen your dedication page. He had to’ve. And yes, maybe it was stupid to respond to each other through dedication pages and books. Especially when you could just text him. But this was the two of you. Communicating in ways that others would be too impatient to follow through with.

You were impatient yourself, you had been waiting for Namjoon for far too long. But you wanted to keep this going. So you did the next best thing. You dedicated your next short story on your blog to him. But not before reading his poetry first.

His book was filled with poems about you. They were all about you. You dog-eared your favorite page. The poem on it resonates with you. It read:

“We met at the wrong time. That’s what I keep

telling myself anyway.

Maybe one day years from now,

we’ll meet in a coffee shop

in a faraway city somewhere

and we could give it

another shot.”

It inspired your response. The perfect start to your short story that, unshockingly, was about Namjoon. So you wrote back.

“Don’t wait until the next life. Maybe we could just get coffee, instead?”

It was all you wrote, and you hoped it was enough.

You also weren’t sure how to expect Namjoon’s reply. You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t done your research. You knew Namjoon often posted poetry on his blog. It wasn’t far off to assume that he would respond there.

If he saw it at all. As days turned into weeks, you began to worry that you had assumed too much about him. He probably didn’t even know you had a blog. Maybe tulip was a name he called all of his girlfriends. Or maybe he thought your last response was too forward.

You checked his blog everyday. Every. Single. Day. There was nothing. No updates or stories or poems. Until he posted a one stanza poem.

“Always remember,

my heart holds you

when my arms cannot.”

You groaned to yourself. How could the person you love be so utterly clueless and annoying? The whole point of your last message was to meet up with him. To make sure that he could actually hold you in his arms. That idiotic brilliant man. He never ceases to amaze you. All that was left now was to determine what happened next.

–

Namjoon was proud of his book of poetry. His favorite part being his (at least what he considered to be a) well crafted dedication to you. The one he loves. The one he has always loved.

He was convinced that he’d have to wait for your next book to get published to read your reply. He was pleasantly surprised when he got a notification from your blog. You weren’t very active there, so he opened the notification quickly, curiosity outweighing the work he was supposed to be completing.

He could barely contain his grin as he read your short story. The whole time thinking about your dedication. This was perfect. He knew you’d play along with this game of back and forth. But now he knew just how hard it was to not text you. Now that the ball was in his court Namjoon felt the pressure.

He couldn’t decide what to do. Did he dedicate a whole book to you just to tell you he wanted you back? Did he write another poem? Did he just say fuck it and text you?

He really couldn’t decide what to do. By the time he had made a decision it had been weeks. He felt guilty at how long you had waited. Realizing that you might not even think he had seen your dedication.

He wrote the poem. And he started on his next book. He was going to make the best out of both worlds.

–

You have been writing to Namjoon in the dedication of your works for months now. Each response garnered only a vague poem back from him. You were annoyed. And you made sure he knew it too, your stories started to reflect your frustrations. And your readers were desperate to find out who exactly you were writing to.

It took them longer than you expected, to be honest. But they finally connected the dots. As you scrolled through a twitter thread explaining the dates of your releases compared to Namjoons, you couldn’t help but smile at both his and your readers coming together. Many of them found that you both attended the same high school and university. At least until Namjoon had graduated early. You could almost see the puzzle pieces click into place in your readers minds.

The best part is that Namjoon’s readers were just as frustrated as your fans, (and even yourself) and were starting to yell at him. Which thank god for, honestly. You were sick of waiting.

He had just released a new book, and you were trying to find the motivation to get off of your couch and go to the bookstore to buy it. He had made you wait months for an actual reply, so you had decided he could wait for you. And he would.

A few days had passed since the release, and as much as you didn’t want to leave the comfort of your couch, you were anxious to read his book. Not to mention your fans and his were tagging you non-stop in reference to his dedication page. So you stood up, got ready and made your way to the bookstore.

When you arrived, you made your way to the new releases section. Namjoon’s book prominently displayed front and center. You took a deep breath and swore on your life that if this dedication was something stupid you would call Namjoon and end this silly thing.

Ignoring the gaze of the nosy shop owner who you had come to know over the past two years, you flipped open to the dedication page. Your heart exploded in your chest. Of course he wouldn’t let you down.

“The bookstore. 10 AM on Tuesdays. Please be free.”

You internally cursed yourself. You had unintentionally stood him up this week. But you’d be damned if it happened again.

You made a note on your calendar and waited.

–

Namjoon waited patiently for you the first Tuesday after his book was released. His anxieties tripling at every welcome jingle of the bell that told him when the door opened. You didn’t show up.

Maybe you didn’t want to see him? Maybe you had been speaking about someone else, or maybe he hadn’t been clear enough about which bookstore. It was nonsense to think that this could’ve worked.

“She hasn’t bought it yet,” Irene said from beside him.

“Jesus, Irene. When did you get there?”

“I came to tell you that she hasn’t seen it after your 12th sigh and nonstop glances to the front door. You’re scaring my customers away.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Namjoon rolled his eyes, but his shoulders untensed in relief. You weren’t standing him up. You just didn’t know.

He would wait here in this bookstore all day everyday until he got the chance to set eyes on you again.

He spent the whole week thinking about how meeting you again would go. Would you want to kiss him? He didn’t know if he’d be able to keep his hands off you when you did meet. Still, he settled his heart with a hug. He’d wrap his arms around you and never let you go again.

He made his way to the bookstore Tuesday morning, he was early. He couldn’t wait any longer. He meandered around the bookstore, heart beating out of his chest as waited for you. What if you didn’t show up today? He should’ve asked Irene if you’ve gotten his book yet.

Namjoon was spinning on his heels to ask that very question when you saw him in between the shelves. The two of you made eye contact, and the whole world stopped. You mustered up all of your courage , calmed your nerves as best as you could and swallowed the lump in your throat.

“You should really stop writing about me,” you said, a grin growing on your face mirrored by his. The entire bookstore was tense, and you waited with bated breath for his reply.

“You first,” he grinned, showing off of his dimples.

And just like that the dam broke. The two of you nearly running to each other, to eliminate any space between you. In a second you were in his arms, lips meeting his desperately.

Kissing him felt right, and as he cupped your face, you pulled away. Breathless, he tugged you impossibly closer to him, noses almost touching as you stared up at him.

“Don’t ever leave me again,” you whispered, tears threatening to spill as you searched his eyes.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” he said, thumb wiping the stray tear that had escaped from your cheek.

Looking up into his eyes, seeing nothing but truth glittering in them, your stomach exploded with butterflies. Because you knew he never would. He was yours, and you were his.

a/n: hope you enjoyed :)

AND THE POETRY IS: the first poem is written by an unknown author, the second poem is from a book called perry poetry written by bethany perry :)

#namjoon fanfic #namjoon x reader #namjoon fluff #namjoon angst #namjoon #rm x reader #rm fluff #rm fanfic #rm angst #bts fluff #bts angst #bts fanfic #bts reader insert #bts #rm

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officialinuyasha · 2 years

Text

InuYasha Wide Edition #27 Translation - Tenseiga

Original Japanese Scans Provided by Me

Spanish Scans Provided by muffin_0626

Translated by @marusamaa-tradus

Proofread and localized by me

Rules: No screenshots or using my photographs, copy/paste, not using without permission, reblogs/linking only

The sword of compassion inherited from his father

Just like InuYasha’s Tessaiga, Tenseiga is a sword forged from the fangs of InuYasha and Sesshoumaru’s father. It’s known that it’s as powerful as Tessaiga, which is said to be able to defeat 100 demons at once. The power of his father, who was a great demon, is engraved on the sword. It’s basically impossible to use it as a weapon, but it’s said its ability is superior to that of Tessaiga since it’s able to nullify even death, a law of nature.

It destroys the messengers of the Underworld and saves lives

Tenseiga’s biggest ability is to revive the dead. The moment Tenseiga is unsheathed, its owner, Sesshoumaru, acquires the power to find the messenger of the Underworld and, when he attacks them, he can make the soul of the dead to stay in our world and save the life of those who died once. However, this can only be used once with each person. It’s not possible to revive the same individual several times with it. Additionally, the ability to damage the beings of the Underworld changes into an attack in the Underworld. This is how Sesshoumaru could damage the Hound of the Underworld.

(page 2)

It creates a barrier and protects its owner

One of Tenseiga’s abilities consists of creating barriers. This only works when Tenseiga acknowledges the one using it as its owner. It radiates light in the entire sword, creates a barrier and protects its owner. It even appears automatically, no matter the volition of its owner, when said owner is at risk. In fact, Tenseiga protected Sesshoumaru when he was injured by the Wind Scar of InuYasha. Even if InuYasha didn’t totally wave Tessaiga so that the Wind Scar could reach its maximum impact, if he had done that, it would have been a great strike with the ability to kill 100 demons in just a second. Therefore, it could be said that this ability, which protected Sesshoumaru as well as possible, is very effective. Sesshoumaru was immobilized for several days, but after some time he recovered. At this stage he had no intention to use Tenseiga, however, this meant that Tenseiga had acknowledged Sesshoumaru as its owner.

It opens the meidou and annihilates enemies

Meidou Zangetsuha was the ability that changed Tenseiga from “Tenseiga of compassion” to a combat sword. It’s an ability that Toutousai added when he reforged it. It cuts the nothingness and opens the path to the Underworld… the Meidou, and with its great power, it transfers the entire body or part of it to the Underworld. Since it’s used to attack directly the body of the enemy, this ability serves for cutting the demons with a liquid body which are difficult to damage. At first, Meidou Zangetsuha cuts as a thin new moon. However, as its owner matures, this moon grows bigger until it becomes a full circle and, as a result, becomes more and more powerful.

It takes an uncountable number of dead to Nirvana

When its owner, Sesshoumaru in this case, swings Tenseiga with a real compassionate heart, its true power as the sword of compassion appears. It’s even able to take 100 souls to Nirvana at once. In the Underworld, Sesshoumaru could lead an uncountable number of dead to the light… that is to say, to their salvation. This is Tenseiga’s true power and the reason why it’s called “the sword of compassion”. This weapon is able to save even those fallen dead in the Underworld, but it depends on the capability of its owner, Sesshoumaru. At this time, he was able to manifest this power after a great sacrifice: the loss of Rin. After all, the swords that InuYasha and Sesshoumaru’s father left as inheritance only perform to their potential when InuYasha and Sesshoumaru show true growth.

(page 3)

At first it was just a cumbersome sword.

Undoubtedly, for someone so cold as Sesshoumaru, Tenseiga, a sword that doesn’t serve to kill, is just a cumbersome burden. By that time, he wasn’t able to use its true power. He just carried it as the inheritance from his father.

He started being able to use it thanks to a change in his heart

Rin, the girl who took care of him when he was injured by the Wind Scar, dies after being attacked by wolves. When he tries to go on his way, Sesshoumaru remembers the smile of the girl, turns back and, for the first time, unseathes Tenseiga to save someone. In this moment Sesshoumaru considers it just a little experiment, however, this event later changes his heart drastically.

The power that made Sesshoumaru change

After saving Rin, something clearly changed inside Sesshoumaru. He started to do actions such as saving Jaken’s life or protecting Rin from the enemies outside by swinging his sword. These actions were unthinkable before because of his coldness. Even Jaken, who served him since long ago, couldn’t hide his astonishment at this change. The feeling of wanting to protect someone had been born inside Sesshoumaru.

(page 4)

Great power that creates new conflicts

The Guardian of the Undeworld is the one that classifies those who enter it and make them part of the pile of dead bodies. It’s an anthropomorphic monster surrounded by vast darkness. It rules the Underworld and collects the dead. Being kidnapped by him means you’re completely dead. However, if it’s defeated while holding the body of a dead one, the body is supposed to revive. Rin wasn’t eligible because she had already been revived by Tenseiga once. Also, those who died time ago can’t be revived, even if the Guardian is defeated. If he buries someone into the mountain of the dead, that’s their end.

The sword makes a new feeling to be born inside Sesshoumaru and his soul to grow

Sesshoumaru enters the Underworld with the purpose of making Tenseiga grow and enhance the power of Meidou Zangetsuha. He was supposed to expand its orbit; however, he faces an unintentional loss since he entered a place where living humans shouldn’t enter with Rin. Sesshoumaru wasn’t much affected thanks to his great demon body, but Rin, who is just a human girl, dies. Also, her life couldn’t be saved with Tenseiga this time. For the first time in his life, Sesshoumaru experiences feelings such as sadness, desperation, fear of losing someone dear to him and regret.

He even feels compassion for lots of deceased. When he holds Rin in his arms and purifies the souls with Tenseiga, the Meidou created by Tenseiga grows bigger. At first, when he just seeked power, he was cold and didn’t know compassion, however, in the Meidou he suffers and discovers the feeling. At the same time as his own growth, Tenseiga made Sesshoumaru grow as a person with a bigger, more compassive soul.

(page 5 - interview with Rumiko Takahashi)

Tenseiga is a total different sword to Tessaiga

I brought Tenseiga to the story thinking of a different sword to InuYasha’s Tessaiga. At first, Sesshoumaru didn’t want to have it. It was called “the sword of compassion” and turned out to be a sword that revives the deceased. This happened because I wanted that, visually, there were scenes with him cutting something, in this case, the messenger from the Underworld; I wanted to describe something like that. That’s why it happened like this.

The will that his father left in Tenseiga

Regarding the true intentions of his father when leaving this sword as inheritance for him, I think he wanted to leave him messages like “you must be more kind” or “you must grow up”. Since it’s a weapon destined for being absorbed by Tessaiga, this means Sesshoumaru didn’t necessarely have to carry it. As his father made him carry it intentionally, he surely wanted to tell him something. I think this part (of the story) was the message to him that he had to “grow up”. At the same time, Tessaiga is a sword that would have never grown without Inuyasha’s process of growing. I suppose their swords have that nature. Sesshoumaru could have thrown it away if he didn’t need it, but he was carrying it all the time; maybe Tenseiga was important to him. He didn’t get rid of it because it was something inherited from his father… but not because he loved his father, but because he probably thought he could use it for a specific purpose or discover something about it. Well, when he went to his father’s tomb he used it to make the guard shut up. It served something, right? He was lucky to have it.

Tenseiga made Sesshoumaru grow up, but…

At the end of the day, Tenseiga is a sword that made its wielder grow. InuYasha got Tessaiga and Sesshoumaru got Tenseiga. I imagine this could have been the other way round. Well, had Sesshoumaru been given Tessaiga at the beginning, he wouldn’t have fought that much with InuYasha. As he wasn’t in conformity for not having the sword, he attacked him several times. This is how Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha got to face each other many times.

#inuyasha #inuyasha wide #inuyasha wide 27 #inuyasha wide edition #inuyasha wide edition 27

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translations-by-aiimee · 3 years

Text

The Husky and His White Cat Shizun - Chapter 13

Original Title: 二哈和他的白猫师尊

Genres: Drama, Romance, Tragedy, Xianxia, Yaoi

This translation is based on multiple MTLs and my own limited knowledge of Chinese characters. If I have made any egregious mistakes, please let me know.

Chapter Index

Chapter 13 - This Venerable One's Bride

No need to remind Mo Ran. Chu Wanning had already figured that out long ago.

Those people were chatting and laughing, but they didn't know where the voices came from. Those who were sitting or standing, gesturing and toasting; their faces were blank, just like paper.

"What do we do? Do we have to go in and drink with them?"

Chu Wanning was not amused by Mo Ran's poorly-timed joke, and he lowered his head in thought.

At this moment, there was a sound of rustling footsteps in the distance. Two long lines of people emerged from the hazy fog, slowly approaching the main building from the distance.

Chu Wanning and Mo Ran subconsciously ducked behind the rocks, and the two teams approached, led by a coquettishly smiling golden boy and girl. These two people had clearly defined facial features. Their faces were colourful, and in the night light, they looked like paper dolls burned for the dead.

Each of them was holding a red candle in one hand. The body of the candle was as thick as the child’s arm, with dragon and phoenix seals entwined on it. As the candle burned, the rich fragrance of the powder wafted to their noses, and Mo Ran almost fainted again. Fortunately, the wound that Chu Wanning stabbed in his arm still hurt, and he squeezed the wound again, finally keeping his consciousness clear.

Chu Wanning gave him a look.

Mo Ran: ". . .cough, this trick works."

After a pause, he wondered again: "Shizun, why don't you need to poke holes in your body to stay awake?"

Chu Wanning: "This fragrance doesn't work on me."

"Huh? Why?"

Chu Wanning said coldly: "Good concentration."

Mo Ran: ". . ."

Headed by the golden boy and girl, the two lines climbed up the steps. Chu Wanning moved his gaze back, looked for a second, and suddenly let out a low "Hmm?"

He was rarely surprised, so Mo Ran was immensely curious. He followed his line of sight to see, also amazed.

He saw that those who swayed in the procession were all dead bodies with closed eyes. They had pale skin and kept the appearance they had before alive. Most of them were very young. They were in their twenties, both men and women. One figure was very familiar--

The Chen family's eldest son, who was seen in the coffin before, appeared in the procession again at some point. His eyes were closed. He followed the scent of candles and walked slowly. Next to him was something different from the others. Others had corpses walking next to them, he walked next to a paper mâché ghost bride.

While Mr. Chen was not a big deal, when the procession came to the end and they saw the people at the end of the two lines, Mo Ran's face drained of blood.

Shi Mei and Chen Yao had their faces hung and were following behind the dead body. Both of them had their eyes closed. Their faces were as white as snow. Their walking posture was no different from those of the dead people in front of them. They didn't even know if they were still alive or not.

Mo Ran's mind exploded. He jumped up and wanted to rush over, but Chu Wanning suddenly grabbed his shoulders: "Hold on."

"But Shi Mei——!!!"

"I know." Chu Wanning stared at the procession slowly moving forward and whispered, "Don't move rashly. Look over there, there is a martial law barrier. If you rush past it, the barrier will scream and I'm afraid that all the faceless ghosts in the yard will rush at you, and the scene will grow out of control."

Chu Wanning is the master of barrier enchantments. He recognized these enchantments well and his eyes were razor-sharp. Mo Ran found that at the entrance to the banquet yard, there was a nearly transparent film.

The golden boy and girl walked to the front of the courtyard. They gently blew on the cupped candle flame, fluttered the flames, and then slowly - passed through the layer of barriers and walked into the courtyard.

The men and women behind them followed them one after the other, passing through the transparent barrier without any issue. The faceless people in the yard drinking wedding wine turned their heads, watching the men and women who entered, laughing and applauding.

Chu Wanning said: "Go, follow them. When you cross the barrier, remember not to breathe and keep your eyes closed. Also, no matter what happens, copy what the corpses are doing and never speak."

He didn't need to say anything more. Mo Ran eagerly wanted to save the others, and immediately followed Chu Wanning into the group of corpses.

The number of corpses in the two lines stayed the same. Chu Wanning stood behind Shi Mei, and Mo Ran could only stand behind Chen Yao. The lines moved very slowly, Mo Ran glanced over at Shi Mei several times. All he could see was his pale profile and a section of white neck that was helplessly drooping.

It was hard to keep up the act all the way to the boundary. The two concentrated and held their breath, smoothly following through to the courtyard. After entering, he found out that the area inside was much larger than it looked like from the outside. In addition to the three-story main building, the courtyard was lined with a hundred or so small rooms, each of which had a red letter of happiness in their window and a red lantern.

The faceless guests suddenly stood up. Salutes were fired and suona horns sounded.

A faceless salute officer in front of the building sang in waves: "The auspicious hour has arrived, and the bride and groom have entered the garden--"

Mo Ran was stunned. What? He dared to say that these two dead bodies are the bride and groom?

He turned his head to ask for help from Chu Wanning, but the brows of Beidou Immortal were furrowed. He was immersed in his own thoughts, unable to extricate himself, and didn't bother to look at Mo Ran.

. . . Mo Ran felt that all his uncle's hard work might be in vain. Going down the mountain to gain experience, with this kind of shizun, was really more damaging to his pride than if he had gone without a shizun.

Suddenly a group of laughing and joking tufts of children rushed out from the courtyard, dressed in bright red clothes, but with white head ropes tied in pigtails. They clustered like fish to either side of the lines and began pulling one person each, leading them to the compartments on either side.

Mo Ran didn't know what to do so he mouthed to Chu Wanning: Shizun, what should I do?

Chu Wanning shook his head, pointing to the tidal wave of dead bodies that followed the boy and girl scattered in front of him. The meaning was clear - follow them.

There was no choice but to let a boy with a bun pull him forward, stumbling into one of the compartments. As soon as he entered, the boy waved his sleeve in the air, and the door closed with a bang.

Mo Ran stared at the little man, wondering what the faceless brat wanted to do to him.

In his previous life, Chu Wanning rescued Shi Mei first and then broke the illusion. He didn't do anything the entire time then he easily removed the evil spirits. And then all he did was relish in the wonderful afterglow of kissing Shi Mei. Afterwards, during Chu Wanning’s report, he actually didn't listen much.

So now the situation had completely changed. He didn't know what was going to happen next, so he could only bite the bullet.

The room was decorated with a dressing table, a bronze mirror standing upright, and a black and red suit embroidered with Ruyi patterns supported on the wooden frame.

The boy patted the stool and motioned for Mo Ran to sit down.

Mo Ran realized that the ghosts here weren't very clever. They were pretty stupid. As long as he didn't speak, they couldn't tell the dead from the living, so he sat in front of the dressing table like the child wanted. The little boy rustled over and started to help him freshen up and change his clothes. . .

Suddenly, a begonia flower drifted in from the window and landed leisurely in the water inside the copper basin.

Mo Ran's eyes lit up. This begonia was called Evening Night Northern Star, which was specifically used by Chu Wanning for silent messaging.

He picked up the begonia from the water, and the flower instantly stretched and bloomed in his palm, revealing a gleam of light gold in the centre.

He twisted the golden light on his fingertips and put it to his ears. Chu Wanning's voice rang in his ears.

"Mo Ran, I have confirmed with Tianwen that this is the illusion created by the Master of Ceremonies Ghost in Caidie Town. It was worshipped by the villagers' incense for a hundred years and gradually cultivated into something more physical. As long as there are more ghost marriages, its power will grow stronger, so it loves to organize these wedding ceremonies. Those corpses lined up in two lines should be the ghost couples that the people of Caidie Town have put together under its witness over the past hundreds of years. It likes this kind of fun. Every night, it summons those corpses to the illusionary realm and conducts another ghost marriage, and each time it conducts it, it grows even stronger."

Mo Ran thought to himself - What a pervert!

When other gods are bored, they'll at most match up boys and girls. What kind of Master of Ceremonies is this? It's said to have an immortal body, but its brain must not have kept up with it. Its only hobby was to match up male corpses and female corpses. It didn't matter if they were already matched, the dead married corpses were summoned from the grave every night, again, again, and again.

Was this group of corpses that good-looking?

This bachelor god must be lonely enough.

Chu Wanning continued: "Its true body isn't here. Don't act rashly. Follow the instructions of the golden boy and girl for a while. Since it wants to absorb the power of their ghost marriage, it will inevitably show its original shape in the end."

Mo Ran wanted to ask: Where's Shi Mei? How's Shi Mei?

"There's no need to worry about Shi Mei. He, like Madam Chen, was bewitched by the fragrance powder and temporarily lost consciousness." Chu Wanning considered the problem very carefully and made it clear that what Mo Ran might be wondering. "Take care of yourself. I've got everything under control."

After speaking, the voice disappeared.

At the same time, the child also took care of Mo Ran's attire. He looked up and saw that the face in the bronze mirror was beautiful, the corners of his lips naturally raised, his eyebrows were clean and fresh, his collars were overlapped, his auspicious clothing was a flaming red, and the hair was long but tied back with a white hairband, and he really looked like a married bridegroom.

The boy made a gesture of "if you would" and the door of the closed compartment creaked open.

Under the corridor, standing a row of corpses in auspicious clothes, both men and women, it seemed that the clay head mould of the Master of Ceremonies Ghost wasn't enlightened yet. As long as he had pairs in the hall to be married, it didn't matter, regardless of whether it was a man and woman, man and man, or woman and woman. He didn't care.

There was only one line of dead bodies standing on this side of the corridor, and the other line was on the opposite side. They were too far away, and he couldn't see if Chu Wanning and Shi Wei had come out.

The procession was moving slowly forward, and every now and then the sound of the chanting of the officials in the building could be heard. The marriage of one pair after another was slowly being completed.

Mo Ran took a look at Chen Yao in front of him and felt that something was wrong. After pondering for a while, when the line was gradually shortening and the last few pairs were about to take their turn, the dirty bastard finally understood— —

Wait! According to the procession, does that mean the woman in front of him is going to be married to Shi Mei? Wouldn't that mean he's going to be paired with that little bitch Chu Wanning? This isn't going to work!

At that moment, the former emperor of the human realm was not happy anymore. He grimaced and unceremoniously pulled Chen Yao, and cut in line and stood in front of the others.

The little boy behind him was taken aback for a moment, but Mo Ran quickly put on the expression of a half-dead hanged ghost with a bowed head, drooping down and mixing in with the corpses. Those golden boys and girls with low cultivation levels were in a daze, probably too dumb to figure out what had happened so they didn't react.

This time Mo Ran was happy. He followed the line with great enthusiasm, ready to walk to the end so that he could meet with Shi Mei on the other side of the corridor.

At the same time.

Chu Wanning glanced at Shi Mei standing in front of him, and thought for a while, not knowing what dangers lay ahead.

He has always been hard-spoken and soft-hearted, though harsh to the point of being repulsive. But, in fact, as long as he was there, he wouldn't put his apprentice in any kind of danger.

As a result, he also tugged Shi Mei and pulled the unconscious man behind him while he stood in Shi Mei's original position.

It was his turn.

The ghost bridesmaid standing at the end of the corridor was holding a black and red tray. Seeing Chu Wanning coming over, he chuckled, his face without facial features making a girl's crisp voice.

"Greetings and congratulations to the bride, she is beautiful and white."

Chu Wanning's face instantly darkened.

Br-Bride. . .? ? Do you have no eyes?

He looked at the blank face of the ghost bridesmaid again and held back a shout.

He really doesn't have any fucking eyes.

The ghost bridesmaid smiled and picked up the red gauze veil in the tray. Raising his jade-like arms and pale hands, he covered Chu Wanning's face. Then he stretched out his cold hand, gently held Chu Wanning, and said with a sweet smile: "Bride, if you would."

Previous Chapter Next Chapter

#2ha novel #2ha translation #2ha #chinese bl #chinese novel #english translation #bl novel #yaoi novel #yaoi #danmei novel #danmei #chu wanning #mo ran #ranwan #the husky and his white cat shizun translation #the husky and his white cat shizun

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antiloreolympus · 3 years

Text

10 Anti LO Asks

1. Just so everyone knows, this is how the “number one worldwide phenomenon” LO ranks on the other Webtoons servers*, ranked from best to worst (November 2021)

Webtoons France: #6

Webtoons LATAM: #9

Webtoons Germany: Doesn’t Rank at all

Webtoons Korea/NAVER: Doesn’t rank at all, one of their lowest rated series ever on the whole site.

So it’s only Number 1 on a single server, meanwhile does either ok, lags behind, or is rejected outright everywhere else. Meanwhile other Western made imports to these other servers (such as Let’s Play and Down to Earth) all do easily top five, while True Beauty ranks as number one in all other servers except the English one, where it’s number 2. Unless America, Canada, and the UK are the “World”, then LO is not as popular as Webtoons’ marketing team wants you to believe.

* Webtoons Indonesia, China, and Thailand are excluded from this list since LO isn’t on any of these.

2. is it just mean to say the romance in Lo is just not good? like i didnt feel anything when they kissed, it just seemed really random. their flirting isnt very cute and it cant seem to decide if its wants them to act like actual adults or teenagers. them constantly being shy after while just gets boring when it happens over and over again. also it constantly has other characters say how "in love" they are which tbh only says to me even rs knows its not written well so she needs to spell it out.

3. why do the stans act like rachel "spending years" on lo means we cant critique it? a lot of things have years put into them, doesnt mean its now flawfree and we have to care about their poor egos. if rachel doesnt want critique, then she should have never agreed to being published much less putting her stuff online to begin with. i swear lo stans have no idea how the actual world works.

4. geniuenly want to know wha's going on in that lily white head of rachel's to not think its REALLY WEIRD to have hades lust after a tiny version of his mother and have persephone be turned on by hades looking like his abusive, murderous dad. like what the fuck is that. what is that saying exactly??

5. cannot stand how lo fans (or just hxp fans in general) claim there are "several versions" where hades doesnt kidnap persephone and she actually elopes willingly with him bc as soon as you ask for proof of this they get awfully quiet. like if there are "several" versions, show us at least ONE source of proof then. and no, it cant be LO, some fanfic, or a tumblr post. give us an actual source from ancient greece and we'll believe you, not going off your word that "it totally exists, trust me".

6. lo hades absolutely seems the type to buy nfts and no i will not elaborate on that

7. idk how the stans were like "how is lo a white savior narrative theyre all blue and green lmao" as if that was some epic own? or that hades being an ugly shade of brown in a human disguise (as in not his actual race? thas literally a disguise?) "proves" theyre not white like?? even rachel's fancast was all white people? even if they dont have races persephone being like "hey dead people i killed! be thankful for what im doing for my own purposes!' is literally a white savior narrative like -

8. Is there actually an anti-lore olympus server? If so, I'd like to get in if possible.

From OP: Yup! Search up ‘anti lo discord’ since it’s the hashtag I used.

9. The more i read LO the more it feels annoying and cringy. From the art to the conversations it’s just a shit show basically. Birthday cards, making Persephone look like a toddler? Hades turning into a giant spider? The humans who were the exact copy of Hades and Persephone?? The jury show? Like? The entire comic is just a cringefest. Not to mention the stans who defend this comic and RS like she’s personally going to save their life. My god had RS said that LO would be a fanfic telenovela webtoon of greek mythology then there would be no problems at all, but to say that this a modern adaptation and retelling of the mythology?? And to say that you know greek mythology better than greek people themselves?? Is this woman having delusion instead of actual food for her meals?

10. i also dont get why rachel keeps making a point persephone is so innocent and would never hurt a fly when its like?? isnt the whole point of the story supposed to be her growing up and being the "badass dread queen" its been promising us? bc it makes no sense to keep insisting she's this precious lil bean but also tell us she will also be some dark girlboss when she's not allowed to own or accept that part of herself? like even her "dark" side is just some vague "feeling"she cant control :/

#anti lo #anti lore olympus #lore olympus critical #lo critical

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lazywitchling · 3 years

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how did the player’s handbook shape your witchcraft? i just bought a copy, and now i’m curious what your thoughts are!

This one is maybe a little more complicated than the Tolkien one, so stay with me here. I'll do my best to explain.

For me, luck and chance are kinda 'sacred concepts'. That's maybe not the right term to use, 'cause it sounds borderline religious. But it's important to my worldview.

I'll be real, I just typed out a massive paragraph that absolutely read like the Charlie Day conspiracy board meme, and then I deleted it.

So let's just say this: The odds of the entire cosmos and all of history and humanity lining up exactly as it did to bring you to my inbox today? Well that's a really big fucking coincidence.

A lot of people say that our existence has to be because of some divinity, some higher power, God or gods or The Universe or whatever, because there has to be something bigger than us writing the story, right? There has to be some higher power pulling the cosmic strings, right? Because otherwise, why are we here? Why do we have consciousness? What is the meaning of life? Is our small human existence really just... one... big... cosmic... coincidence?

My answer: Yep! Sheer chance.

"Oh wow, Jes, that's a really dim view of things, isn't it?"

Nope! No no no, because see... "Chance" is not all there is. Because we also have narrative.

I met my best friend through tumblr because she happened upon a blog of mine via the broken tag system of this blue hellsite. Total coincidence, right? Well, yeah. But while our meeting was chance, our friendship is not. I had to place significance on her being in my life. She had to place significance on me being in hers. We happened to cross each others paths via chance, but our narrative, the story we are constantly telling ourselves about our own lives, said "Hey, this person is cool and I want to talk to her more." The meeting was coincidence, but we made it important. We said "This person is important to me, and I am going to make the effort to talk to her more."

What was the cosmic ~*~meaning~*~ of that meeting? Well, nothing, until we gave it one. We made it significant.

idk, I'm thinking also on what ei-len said a while back: "The witch is a component of the spell". This might be a stretch of that quote, but stay with me here. I see a lot of people around witchblr see things that they think are omens, signs, deities reaching out to them, something. And they go ask other witch blogs "I saw a crow on my way to work! What does it mean??" My answer: Nothing on its own, really. But it's not on its own. You saw it. You are a part of the story here too. What does it mean to you at this time? Don't remove yourself from the equation here. A crow on its own is just a crow being a crow. But if you're walking through the park and you're sad and you're wishing for a sign from the universe that everything is going to be okay, and then a crow shows up in your path, and you love crows and they're your favorite animal, and it just happened to show up right when you needed it to... well. That's something special, isn't it? Now it's a sign. It's a sign because you were there! And you are part of this sign, too!

Now what the FUCK does this have to do with D&D?!

Roll a D20. What's it land on? 5. Damn. Roll another one. What's it land on? 17. Ooh yay! Roll another one. Natural 20!! FUCK YEAH!!!

Every single side on that die has the same chance of coming up. You have as much of a chance of rolling a 5 or a 12 or a 17 as you do a nat20 or a nat1. But we (or Wizards of the Coast, rather) have decided that certain numbers mean certain things. We've put meaning to chance. And we use that to create stories, adventures, emotional connections, big epic tales where we're the heroes who save the world.

Your narrative affects chance, it affects what you roll for. And then that roll, the chance, in turn affects your narrative. It shapes your story. And again through the cycle, your story affects chance once again. And on and on and on.

Life kinda works that way too, if you pay attention.

#it still sounded like the Charlie Day Conspiracy Board #I apologize #anyway #witchy meta #the lady

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cryptidcircuslife · 3 years

Text

Hi unofficial compilation of Getting Away From A Place tips

this is tailored to a specific situation so please do your own research for stuff more specific to you

running away tips subreddit

Short Term Preparation:

These are the things you can prepare now if you have to get out fast and unexpectedly

Do not tell anyone about your plan other than those directly involved in helping you.

Make a plan for your cash. You don't want to access an account your family can access or freeze. Slowly withdraw money and hide it if it's at risk of being taken. Withdrawing it all the day you leave will raise a red flag and have you on camera (atm or bank), if you even have time. As a legal adult, you may be able to get away with this because you aren't doing anything against the law. Just make sure to do it before your family finds out about you leaving. When you leave, if you don’t want to be traced- don’t use cards.

For hiding paper cash- you know your house and its occupants best. Determine what objects you have that won't be thrown away or tampered with by someone, and if they have a hollow space, store it. I used to use opaque pill bottles, hidden pockets or bindings in notebooks, the linings of old dvd or game cases, water bottles, gum cases, (all of these put in clothing or backpack pockets), opening the lining of coats and backpacks and hiding it inside of that, inside of hygeine products like the hollow part of a deodorant stick. Inside old electronics. in the stuffing of a plushie. Underneath the insoles of shoes you dont wear often.

Even if your money isn't at risk of being taken, store some of it separately anyway for emergencies.

I heard the bare minimum for running away with no destination or job is $1k. Judge for yourself your needs.

Get a backpack. Waterproof/resistant is better, but any is good. Don't pack it yet, so you don't arouse suspicion. But test out packing it to see if everything fits, and unpack it. Modify some hidden compartments so that when you travel, you will have places to hide your IDs and Cash- it's necessary so no one steals it. You want to travel light, regardless of your situation, because packing and carrying a ton of stuff takes time and you don't always have time on the day you leave.

Get a secondary bag. I learned the hard way that a backpack doesn't fit everything you'll need. Especially with amenities, food, clothing, personal possessions.... A duffel bag, one of those canvas grocery bags. A tote. Something to hold by hand.

Packing lists for running away are surprisingly similar to emergency evacuation pack lists.

Clothes to pack: 1 short sleeve shirt. 1 long sleeve shirt. 1 pair of pants. 7 sock pairs. 7 underwear pairs. 1 jacket. Some winter gear if you can, because nights will always be cold especially if you are stuck outside.

Hygeine to pack: deodorant. toothpaste. toothbrush. floss. baking soda if you’ll be on the road for a long time. Special products you may need- cream for a skin condition, sunscreen. I recommend a small essential oil bottle as a bug repellent, and some have antibacterial properties to help you/your clothes not smell musty af, and they're safe on the skin.

Must-haves to pack: you should have your social security card and another form of ID, like a state ID or drivers license. Pass port if you have one, and birth certificate or a copy if you can. Your cash. A map of your state/region.

Valuables to pack: bring a few things to keep you entertained that are small. A small book, or a notebook and pen. Try not for anything too heavy or bulky. Any survival gear you may own (sewing kits, first aid, multitools, matches, lighters).

If you will be staying outside, get a sleeping bag. Thermal blanket for cold temps.

Food to pack: bring healthy nonperishable food. Junk food won't do much for you on the move. Go for granola/protein bars, dried fruit, meat bars, jars of nut butters, canned food. A water bottle. Bring all medication you need.

Stuff to wear on you: go for baggy and multi-pocketed stuff. Don't wear your favorite clothing if you don't want to be identified, and make sure they blend well into the environment. Grey is the most unnoticeable color, then black, then neutrals. If identification isn't a problem, only wear and pack your favorite things. Wear comfortable and travel safe shirt and pants. Wear a hoodie or tie it around your waist so it doesnt take up bag space. A hat. Keep some cash in a hidden pocket if you can. Wear comfortable sneakers you can move around in for a long time and is good for the weather of where you live. Keep your self defense on you - knives, pepper spray, etc. (and learn the laws for those in your area)

Note: Storing some of these supplies around or in hiding places won't be too weird. Keeping the 'valuables' in the backpack won't be too strange to anyone either. Keeping everything nearby so you can quickly dump everything in the bags and go is a good idea. But Do Not Pack the clothes until the day you leave. clothes are a warning signal for leaving. And you cannot let them find out about your plans, especially if you are in a dangerous place.

Last note: know these are flexible to you. You can add or change stuff, as long as you have the most important things.

Long Term:

These are the things you can prepare for better

Save as much money as possible. You can secretly sell things.

Research more about what you may experience, be that attaining financial independence or how to train hop and live on the streets temporarily. Look at other people's tips for running away, or their experiences. Research moving out tips. Research specific to your area or where you will be headed. Libraries, shelters, charities, support organizations, 24-hour restaurants and locations. Research ticket prices, gas prices, etc. Apartment search. Be sure to remove those from your history. Cleaning it entirely may be suspicious if someone monitors that.

Build a budget and a food plan for how you will use your savings on the road.

As an adult, if you manage to get hired secretly for a job in your target location, you can apply for housing there, too. You will get set move-in dates and can give dates you can start working that work with your runaway schedule.

If you're running away as a minor, you can't stay with friends. However, as an adult you can. If someone is trying to find you, you'll have to be careful still.

If you need to leave fake trails because someone might search for you, there are some excellent resources by people trying to hide from domestic violence. The main tips are leaving fake trails in cities far away from wherever you will be- job applications you have no intention of following through on, apartment applications, phone calls, internet searches, purchases, etc. These can go more in-depth.

If you will be tracked, figure out how to get a burner phone. These are pretty cheap, and so are their service plans. You may want to consider this anyway to pay for your own service if your phone is taken off the existing one. Write down phone numbers you want to keep.

Make sure you have the proper amounts of medications you will need.

Be careful with this one, but figure out if you have any smaller hard-to-replace valuables that you want to bring to your new life but can't pack for your method of travel or might get stolen. Only do this if you have a place you are going to, and are going to get a job and housing there. Make a plan with a trusted friend to hold on to a few things you cannot carry in your bags and arrange for them to be mailed or picked up later. Only do this with one or two things that are easy to carry, because you will need to get it to them somehow, right? dont do this if you don't have the methods or the time before your runaway day. A good example is that I don't want to replace my laptop but I can't tow it through town and across state lines on a train. my friend can take care of it until I am settled.

Tie off any loose ends that you need to. This can be waiting for a responsibility to be gone, waiting for a last paycheck, or attending something you wanted to go to one last time.

Delete old accounts, and eventually deleting your emails and social media associated with your identity.

Note: The best thing you can do with time is make your supplies as efficient as possible, and plan. plan plan plan.

Schedule your leave date. or a range of leaving dates. But know sometimes it can be unpredictable. Make it a day when no one is home- especially if it's a dangerous situation.

On Runaway Day:

Hopefully you have a small window of time where you are alone.

Make sure you’re wearing all your runaway clothes you have prepared.

Pack your backpack and duffel bag quickly.

Leave a note, even if you don't want to. This is important, because you don't want a search for you because someone thought you were kidnapped or murdered. This way, officials can pretty much ignore it since it was voluntary.

Don’t look nervous or afraid while you are out, since that’ll draw unwanted attention.

If you made a plan for someone to pick you up, or to meet someone, make sure they are punctual. Don't meet right in front of your house if possible. Go a few streets away or somewhere less noticeable. Again, make sure whatever you bring is easy to carry so you move fast and no one tries to steal it.

If unfortunately you have to leave very quickly and haphazardly, leave anything not immediately important to survival behind.

Buy your burner phone with cash. Add your written numbers to the contacts. Create your new email and social media from there. If you're hiding, don't take pictures of yourself. Don't use your real name or information. Keep private accounts, and don't interact with anyone who will give you away.

If you have other travel plans, make your way there. Head to your safe places, your shelter, wherever you have planned. You are in your new life.

Once You Are Out:

Take care of your immediate needs. Find resources for food, water, and shelter.

Start accessing any support resources, regardless of what your situation is. In a town I lived in, there was an LGBTQ+ resource center that had entertainment/food/clothing/education clubs/showering/laundry/other amenities and programs for both lgbtq+ and homeless youth. I also took part in a gift drive for a specific minority that I qualified as, which gave me a lot of food.

Start working towards your future goals. Start job searching, and from there being able to secure housing. Start making friends. build a support structure. i hope it goes well

Rebuild your supplies and closet when you have the location security to do so.

#runaway #running away #runaway help #runaway tips #running away help #running away tips #abuse survival

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goldentournesol · 4 years

Text

Twin Flames

(Spencer Reid x Reader)

The one where Reader deals with the aftermath of Maeve while she struggles with her intense feelings for Spencer.

Length: 4.3k

A/N: lots of angst...like lots of it. Big thanks to @hopefulfangirl24 for requesting. i totally broke my own heart writing this. ENJOY!

masterlist

Sometimes the hardest part isn't letting go, it's starting over. -Nicole Sobon

Starting over.

What did starting over even look like for Spencer? Will the dread and guilt ever stop washing over him as the sun melts into the horizon and the moon takes its place?

It was starting to feel like he could never move on from the pain of losing Maeve. Day and night, he stared at the four walls of his apartment wondering what could have been if he had said something different. He wondered if the outcome would be the same. He wondered whether fate had ever been kind to him in at least one of the infinite universes that might exist, giving him the ending he so desperately wanted. After so many years, Spencer finally allowed himself to be brave enough to fall in love and oh how he wished he regretted it, but falling in love was anything but regrettable. Falling in love meant being vulnerable, and he knew that, but he didn’t know just how much it would hurt. The purity of Spencer’s soul allowed him to love so deeply, so intensely, and with all his heart which made it all the more easy to hurt so deeply and so intensely.

He yearned to become unfamiliar with the feeling of heaviness. Everything was so heavy, his heart, his stomach, his tears. Each of them weighing on him like anvils that he couldn’t lift no matter how hard he tried. In theory, he knew the anvils could be lifted with help from others, but that was too much of a strenuous task to tackle right now. He’ll handle the anvils all on his own for now.

The world seemed eerily desolate and Spencer couldn’t seem to remember what it looked like before it turned into the dull, washed out version he became acquainted with now. Penelope had tried to add some color back into his life, but her actions were futile against the monstrosity of grief. The entire team had tried to reach out and while he appreciated the gestures, he had no capacity for anything other than the agony that consumed him.

Derek left what seemed like a thousand messages on his phone, but he still checked to see who called every time his phone rang. Which is exactly why it was unprecedented to see a different name pop up at the sound of his ringtone in the middle of the day. A name which belonged to a person he’d held very dear for so long. They haven’t spoken in months, maybe a year and if Spencer’s mind wasn’t currently overcrowded with thoughts, he’d definitely be able to recall the exact amount of time between speaking to her last and now. Why is she calling him now? What if something was wrong? Did she know about what happened? No, how would she find out? His curiosity had possessed his body, making him answer the call.

“Y/N?” He croaked, clearing his throat, having not used his voice in days.

“Spencer! How’s my favorite genius doing? I didn’t know if you’d changed your number or something, but I’d just thought I’d call anyway! Are you at work? Sorry, I can call you back later if-” She shouted excitedly into the phone, but Spencer was quick to end her worries.

“No, no. I’m not at work.” Spencer said curtly.

“Oh, is everything alright?” She asked, concerned. She could tell by the tone of his voice that something was not right.

“Did Garcia put you up to this?” Spencer deflected defensively.

He knew Garcia was aware that Y/N was the only person he’d never turn away from. Not after all they’d been through. She was the one person who never left his side. She and Spencer were undeniably connected by some sort of un-explainable, otherworldly force. Call them soulmates, twin flames, mirror souls--whatever. That was what they were. It didn’t matter to them if they were romantically involved or not, the connection between them had surpassed the simple stages of romance. Spencer often found himself wondering what could have been if he’d never left Vegas. If he’d never left her.

“Garcia? The tech analyst? No, why? Spencer, did something happen?” She recalled meeting the eccentric woman when she visited Spencer in Quantico a few years back.

Spencer’s brow furrowed and his mouth spoke before his brain could tell it not to, “Then why are you calling me?” He spat impatiently, pinching the bridge of his nose, already wishing he didn’t have to prolong the conversation.

Y/N was taken aback through the phone at his retort but her heart ached for him, knowing that something dreadful must have happened for him to act so out of character, but she took the phone off her ear to check if she had dialed the correct number anyway. She had.

“I just wanted to catch up with you. Is this about not calling you recently? I’m sorry, Spencer, I got caught up with work and I moved into a new apartment, and things have just been really hectic lately. Are you okay?” She worried through the phone and Spencer could practically feel her disquietude seeping from the speaker.

“So, you really don’t know…?” Spencer trailed off, already feeling the guilt bubble up in his chest, still avoiding the question. He didn’t even know what okay meant anymore.

“Know what, Spence? Oh God, is Diana okay?!” She shrieked, her mind snapping to the worst case scenario.

Her genuine reaction had made Spencer ease the frown that had been permanently etched onto his features for days. It wasn’t a smile yet, but it was something. She and his mother had always shared a bond that he never really understood, even as an adult. That was how compassionate she was, she was able to instantly connect with people and she would do it so well. It used to baffle Spencer when they were children, but perhaps that’s what drew her to him. Their souls were tied together with an invisible string.

She heard him release a huff and some shuffling was heard from his side, “My mom is fine.”

She let out a sigh of relief, “So, what’s going on?”

He paused, debating whether or not to tell her. She sighed again, knowing it must have been something terrible if he wasn’t willing to talk about it.

“Spencer?” She called softly when he fell silent. She was already browsing for plane tickets from Las Vegas to DC.

“I...I couldn’t do it, Y/N. I couldn’t save her.” He sniffled into the phone and her heart had practically escaped from its place in her chest and landed in the pits of her stomach. Her arms and shoulders were immediately overtaken with chills. She didn’t know who he was referring to, but the dread set in quicker than she imagined. She could tell this was bad, even for Spencer and his line of work. Whatever happened had ripped him to shreds and she was not about to sit idly in Vegas.

Two days later, she struggled to haul a small suitcase out of the cab she took from the airport to Spencer’s apartment complex. The flight was way more exhausting than it should have been. She placed the suitcase on the ground with a huff and spotted two blonde women descending from the stairs that led to Spencer’s apartment as she neared the entrance. She quickly recognized them as Spencer’s beloved coworkers, Garcia and JJ. Garcia’s eyes found hers and let out a surprised gasp.

“Hey, I know you! You’re Spencer’s friend--from Vegas! Y/N, right?” Garcia announced as Y/N entered the building, stopping right before the stairs.

“Hi, Penelope.” Y/N said expectantly with a playful smile. Garcia was pleasantly surprised when she remembered who she was and pulled her into a warm embrace.

“Hi, JJ.” she smiled as she gave her a hug, “Any luck with Spencer?”

The two women shared a look and sighed deeply.

“No, he hasn’t even spoken to us through the door.” JJ said with a heavy heart before she continued, “How did you know? Did he call you?”

Y/N shook her head, “No, I called him.”

“And he picked up?!” Garcia exclaimed, eliciting a half-laugh from Y/N.

“Yeah, he did. I don’t know how it happened, I just, you know when you get a feeling like in the pit of your stomach? It felt like he needed me all of a sudden--sorry, that sounds so weird.” She apologized, shaking her head slightly.

“No, it’s okay. Maybe you can get through to him. We’re all really worried about him.” JJ explained and Y/N nodded.

“I still don’t really know what happened, was it...that bad?” Y/N felt silly for asking. The two shared another look. A look that held so much shared trauma and empathy for their friend. Y/N’s heart sank as she let out a shuddered breath at their silent reaction. She glanced up at the stairs helplessly, wondering if she was strong enough to help him through the turmoil he’s experiencing.

“He’s refused to see anyone for the past two weeks, please let us know if anything changes.” Garcia pleaded and they proceeded to exchange numbers to keep in touch. Y/N nodded and smiled gratefully at them before making her way up the stairs and facing Spencer’s door.

She took a deep breath before knocking. Spencer held back a groan as he dropped his copy of The Narrative of John Smith into his lap, bringing his hands to his face in an act of exhaustion. He wanted to scream at them to leave him alone, but he simply didn’t have the energy to do so. He’d settle on ignoring them for now. The knocking carried on, but it was paired with a gentle voice that Spencer knew all too well. JJ and Garcia watched from the bottom of the steps, bouncing with anticipation.

“Spencer? It’s Y/N. Can you please open up?” She called through the wooden door.

Spencer froze in his place. Was he finally asleep and dreaming? Did she really come all this way for him or was he imagining it? Was fate finally giving him a taste of kindness? A kindness he so desperately wished for? He suddenly retreated into the darkest corner of his mind, the dark place which never failed to remind him on an hourly basis just how unworthy of love he really was. Not hers, not Maeve’s, not anyone’s. His thoughts were interrupted yet again by another insistent knock. It sounded too clear to be a figment of his imagination. He forced himself up from his place on the couch and made his way to the door. She heard shuffling from the other side and bit her lip. JJ and Garcia made a move to leave before they heard the sound of the door opening. They shared an excited look, not even caring that they were almost half an hour late to work at this point.

Spencer’s sullen eyes found her bright ones immediately. She gave him a soft smile and he swore the world around him withered away slightly.

“Hey, genius.” She spoke with her signature tenderness and Spencer didn’t hesitate to engulf her in a long awaited embrace. She let out a breath at the sudden force but welcomed him into her arms anyway. JJ and Garcia grinned at each other, a newfound wave of relief hitting the both of them. They left for work, grins of relief never leaving their faces.

“You’re....you’re here? You’re really here?” Spencer mumbled as he stuffed his face into her neck, her presence filling him with a sense of familiarity, one he so hopelessly craved.

She nodded into his shoulder, squeezing him impossibly tighter, “Yeah, Spence, I’m right here.”

She felt his chest expand against hers and he released a deep, heavy sigh. He suddenly felt a sense of security wash over him, his arms tightened around her waist, lifting her off the ground slightly as he squeezed his eyes shut, hoping to relish in her warm embrace for just a few moments longer. Relief flooded his chest, and he felt like he could breathe again. He was inexplicably glad that the first thing he could breathe in again was the smell of her perfume. He vouched to never allow himself to forget the level of comfort she brought again. Spencer momentarily forgot about his sorrows in her arms, but the agony was far too unforgiving and the moment of bliss didn’t last. His chest clenched again as he set her down and pulled away from her.

“Y-you didn’t have to come all the way out here.” He frowned, struggling to hold himself together in front of her.

“Stop that, you know I’d drop everything in a heartbeat for you.” She attempted to smile despite her eyes welling up with tears at the sight of his suffering. He nodded and they both stepped into his apartment, her dragging her suitcase in with her.

“You came from the airport?” He said with a small voice as he saw her pull the bag in. He had expected her to stop by whichever hotel she booked a room at first.

“Yeah, I came as soon as I landed. I needed to see you first.” She said, pulling him to his couch by the hand, careful not to step on any of the books that lay on the floor.

“Do you…” he paused, swallowing his tears, “do you have to stay at the hotel?”

“No, Spence, I don’t have to. I can stay here if you want.” She gently stroked her thumb across his knuckles.

“Please? Please...stay?” His voice cracked and suddenly his face scrunched up in an attempt to suppress a sob, but to no avail.

A heartbreaking sob escaped from his lips and she wrapped herself around him without a second thought. Cooing at him lovingly and rubbing his back, reminding him every so often that she was right there. Once the floodgates had opened, they had no idea when they would stop. She held his shaking body tightly to hers as if she could somehow absorb some of the pain he felt and tried not to let any of her own tears fall onto him. It broke her heart to see him so saddened.

She pressed kisses to the side of his head as he calmed down, threading her fingers through his messy, tangled hair. Spencer’s ear was now resting against her heartbeat, he focused on the steady sound and he felt his eyes droop with the exhaustion of days without sleep. She smiled slightly and soon fell asleep, making up for the sleep she missed on the flight over.

Hours later, they awoke and moved around the apartment in silence. Or rather she moved in silence while he stayed on the couch, looking for anything to drown out his sorrows. She focused on making him a balanced breakfast, despite the fact that it was almost 3 pm.

“Spencer? Come eat. I made coffee, too.” She called out, already eating off her plate. She hoped she wouldn’t have to physically drag him off the couch. She smiled when she heard him drag his feet all the way to the kitchen. They ate together in silence, although Spencer was thankful for the warm food.

“Do you know why I joined the FBI?” He asked after a while. She stared at him curiously and he continued, “I joined the FBI to protect people. That’s the whole point of the job. I wanted to protect her, I wanted to save her, and I failed. I failed, Y/N. What’s the point of me being an FBI agent if I can’t even protect the ones I love?” He ranted as he looked at her for answers.

“What is the point of loving anyone if I can’t protect them?” He frowned, tears pooling on the inside of his eyes. She frowned in response, clutching the cup of coffee tight between her hands.

“Do you want to start from the beginning?” She offered and he quickly realized she had no idea who he was talking about.

“Her name is...was Maeve. She was the geneticist who helped me get rid of my migraines. I sent her my brain scan and she was the only one who actually helped. I never actually met her, though, all our communication happened through payphones or letters because she had a stalker. She didn’t know who they were, just that they were dangerous. I’d call her every Sunday and we’d just...talk. We sent letters under pseudonyms. It was nice. It was more than nice, actually. It was the first time I ever felt appreciated for who I am, I didn’t have to worry about her judging the way I looked. I-I fell in love with her before I even saw her. We planned a date, finally, but I sent her home because I thought I saw her stalker. So stupid. I was so stupid. I was so paranoid, Y/N. Good things just don’t happen to Spencer Reid, I should have known.” He paused, shaking his head and holding back tears.

“Anyway, she was abducted by her stalker. We thought it was her fiance at first, but it wasn’t. It was his girlfriend...Diane.” He shuddered as the name left his lips. “She was a grad student at the university Maeve taught at and she rejected her thesis. Can you believe that? I lost the one good thing I had over a thesis?” He laughed bitterly, tears streaming down his face. It was deeper than that, but he didn’t care to explain.

“I only got 2,412 hours of communication with her. Even though I remember every word, it’ll never be enough.” He aggressively wiped at his cheeks. “I told Diane I’d die for her...for Maeve. I meant it, too. I would have died for her!” He slammed a frustrated hand on the table, shaking the tableware.

“Apparently that was the worst possible thing to say because it set her off. She...she shot herself in the head and the bullet...the b-bullet--” He cut himself off with a sob, unable to finish the sentence, the grief hitting him like it was a tsunami and he was an unsuspecting beach town.

“It’s okay. It’s okay.” She repeated as she rushed to crouch down in front of him, taking both his hands. She kissed his knuckles before wiping her own tears.

What kind of world did they live in where they had to worry about tragedies like this? She suddenly had a brewing hatred for the world around her. How could it let something so terrible happen to someone so good. Spencer Reid was good, and he deserves nothing but good things in his life. As much as the story pained her, she couldn’t begin to imagine the pain he was feeling.

“I know you blame yourself, Spence. It’s gonna be hard not to at first. But you have to understand that none of this is your fault. You didn’t pull that trigger. She did. I’m so sorry, Spence. I’m so, so sorry. This should have never happened to you, or to anyone. The pain is gonna suck, grief is not easy, but you don’t have to go through it alone. You know that right?” She spoke softly, trying as hard as she could to keep her voice steady for him. He looked at her and saw the truth in her eyes. He nodded ever so slightly and sniffled.

“I know.” He squeezed her hands once and she smiled reassuringly. Her smile made him feel a little bit better. He didn’t want the team’s help, they’d all just treat him like a wounded puppy. She was so unconditionally compassionate and loving, he never wanted to stray far from her again. She got up from her crouched position and pulled him to stand with her. She wrapped her arms around his back and leaned into his chest. He squeezed her tighter, tears soaking into her shirt once again. “Thank you.” He muttered. She nodded. “How long are you staying?” His heart clenched, not wanting to see her go.

“I’ll be here for as long as you need, love.” She rubbed circles across his back. He pulled away to face her.

“What about your job?” He frowned, wiping a hand over his face.

“Don’t worry about that, I’ve got lots of vacation days saved up.” She reassured, “Besides, I’d rather be here with you than at that stupid job anyway.” She rolled her eyes, thinking of her impossible boss. Spencer suppressed a smile.

“Wait, you’re still working for--”

“Yup, same asshole.” She laughed and Spencer smiled.

He smiled!

He remembered all the times she would complain about her horrible boss over the phone.

“So, you said you moved?” Spencer asked, leading her back to the couch.

“Yeah, I really hated my old apartment.” Spencer nodded, “I’m really sorry for not calling you. I missed you so much and I thought about you practically every day...it’s just, you know, it’s easy to get caught up in all the little things.” She apologized, feeling guilty.

“It’s just as much my fault, I haven’t called either. And...I missed you too.” Spencer said.

“It’s alright, we’ve both been busy.” She smiled at him.

“You would have loved her.” Spencer trailed off, frowning. She let out a sigh.

“I’m sure I would have, Spence.” She mirrored his frown.

“She reminded me of you in a lot of ways now that I think about it. She was kind and compassionate. She was funny, she liked to make puns and she was good with words.” He reminisced sadly. All she could do was smile halfheartedly. On one hand, she was glad he got to experience such a love, but on the other, she found herself fighting off a feeling of jealousy.

“I never thought I’d get over you.” He admitted, fidgeting with his hands and avoiding her gaze, yet he said it as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Spencer had already bared his soul to her, what was this one confession in the grand scheme of things?

“What?” She whispered, completely caught off guard. He glanced at her to see her shocked face.

“What? Don’t act like you didn’t know.” He scoffed lightly. He was right, she always suspected his feelings for her but she never wanted to entertain the idea of it in case she was wrong. She’d been hurt so many times that she didn’t even want to think about being hurt by the one person she’d loved more than anyone else.

She loved Spencer. She knew that. There was no doubt in her mind. They were twin flames. They danced around each other and separated, but never burnt out.

“In fact, I don’t think I could ever get over you, Y/N. I’ve always loved you.” He spoke quietly. “You don’t have to say anything right now, I’m not expecting you to. I think I’m so upset over Maeve because, of course, I loved her, but in so many ways she reminded me of you. And if I can’t protect her, then I can’t protect you.”

“I, um, I don’t know what to say.” She stammered. She knew he was overwhelmed with emotion so she tried not to take his words too literally. But the confession hit her like a truck. She didn’t know what to do. He’s mourning the loss of his girlfriend, it would be completely selfish for her to take advantage of his feelings. It’s not like he was asking anything of her, he was just hanging it all out to dry. He was so vulnerable right now, she couldn’t act upon her own feelings. They both knew that.

She felt her throat run dry at all the words she wanted to say, but she settled on, “We should talk about this later, Spence.”

He gave her a half smile and nodded, the numbness setting in.

The next few days blurred into each other. They consisted of Y/N cleaning up around the apartment, making food, doing laundry. Spencer was doing his best to help her out, but he found too much comfort inside the walls he built for himself. She didn’t push him to do anything he didn’t want to do. She’d convinced him to leave the house twice, both times going for a walk in the sunlight. She made sure he brushed his hair and shaved his face. Honestly without her, he’d probably still be stuck in his spot on the couch. She updated his coworkers daily, letting them know that he was doing better. She even held him at night when he cried for the love that was ripped too soon from him.

“Y/N?” Spencer called one morning as he walked in on her in the kitchen.

“Yeah?” She turned away from the coffee machine to face him. She still looked as beautiful as ever even under the light coming from his dodgy kitchen window.

“I just want to thank you. For all you’ve done for me. It couldn’t have been easy for you.” He smiled shyly. She smiled brightly at him, moving closer to wrap her arms around him tightly.

“You don’t have to thank me. You would have done the same for me.” She looked up at him and into his honey colored eyes. The eyes that have shed buckets worth of tears in the past few days.

“Yeah, I would have.” He joked, finally feeling like himself again, resting his hands on her waist. “I meant what I said, by the way.”

She nodded, “I know. But we’re not in any rush, are we? I’d wait for you forever if I had to, Spencer Reid.”

And he wouldn’t have to worry, because twin flames always find each other.

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