#because I know the stuff that got triggered earlier is also the kind of stuff that makes our brain start bringing up that source stuff

[thethingything]

world's 2nd hottest guy almost falls down the stairs. again

#thoughts #personal #🍬 post #vent post #I was carrying a bunch of laundry and couldn't grab anything and instead had to opt for trying to fall forwards #and hit my arm on the bannister. but this is better than falling backwards down the stairs 👍 #it was just alarming and I'm already trying to get our brain to not be weird about staircases #because I know the stuff that got triggered earlier is also the kind of stuff that makes our brain start bringing up that source stuff

[thatsonemorbidcorvid]

I would like to know your opinion about something (and other women's if they'd like to join).

Earlier this week I saw a post on instagram where woman says she does not wear any makeup on the red carpets. Really nothing more than that text and an edit of pictures of her. So many comments were insulting her looks, and I mean the top comments with thousands of likes. I won't get too much into what they were saying to her, but some of the stuff wouldn't even be able to be hidden with makeup (phisically impossible).

And I think to myself, women who wear makeup don't get this kind of treatment (at least not this blatant). They might even have obvious cosmetic procedures done, but people mostly don't comment that in their pictures? Their comment section is usually from girlboss women types.

It seems that people see women with makeup on, and even though they might see the same "imperfections" they see on a makeupless woman, they will think "At least she is trying".

Do you agree or think that I am missing something?

"At least she is trying"

Ooh anon, you’ve just landed your fist on the big red button that triggers a rant - cheers!

This is something I think about SO much, because I have 100% seen this pattern, including in my own thinking, and it fascinates me. Some other examples of this phenomenon, in my opinion:

women starting social media videos with “I’m sorry I’m not wearing any makeup, I know I look like shit, but I just had to jump on here quickly and…”

women advising on how to use heartless curlers overnight “so you look like you’ve got up early and done your hair”

catching myself thinking about ways to aestheticise/feminise my body hair, ways to make it look intentional

I see this SO much. This undercurrent that the key is the effort, the trying, the caring. That it’s ok to look ‘bad’ as long as you put your energy into grovelling about it, or it’s ok to save energy as long as you still look ‘good’. The two go hand in hand - women feeling they have to put effort in and look ‘good’, or at least have to do one or the other. It’s not just about looking ‘good’, it’s also about caring that you look ‘good’ and trying to look ‘good’ and putting time and energy into looking ‘good’.

I don’t have an articulate explanation for it but I have this sense that it is so so important, so I love you for giving me the chance to talk about it, thank you! And I’d also love to hear other women’s thoughts.

#it needs a tag I think… #effort femininity #maybe

[shantyofme]

So I was just rewatching RTTE and I think I found my favorite episode, and it’s definitely Sandbusted.

Everything about this episode is great. I love the uncommon duos that are shown, like Hiccup and Snotlout, and Fishlegs and Astrid.

Like how you can tell Snotlout really wants to help Hiccup with his gift for Astrid and just likes annoying Hiccup, and how Fishlegs is acting as Astrid’s wingman.

The twins as usual are great, with Tuffnut having the trigger word “tears” and Ruff comforting him 🥹. Also the twins helping Astrid with their great fashion sense, amazing.

All the hiccstrid too 😍. Hiccup tells her that she’s the greatest gift he could ever have like what??!! They’re so cute and for what. And when Astrid was trying to avoid Hiccup, that was kind of funny. When she said Stormfly was just excited to see Johan Stormfly looked at her like “bitch what??”

Or when Astrid is frantically looking for Hiccup and even lashes out at the twins because she’s so worried. But she does apologize, she learned from an earlier episode not to be too harsh on them, even though Tuff’s comment about Hiccups leg was a little out of pocket.

Even the new dragon in this episode was great. I personally really like the Sandbuster, it’s glass thing is really cool, and it’s model is really interesting too, I really like how it looks.

Oh! And when Hiccup and Snotlout disappear, Hookfang freaks out and starts digging in the sand cus he’s worried 🥹, he’s the cutest (he’s my favorite dragon in the whole franchise so ima little biased)

But my all time favorite part about this episode is Snotlout’s obvious character growth. From HTTYD 1 and Rob/DoB and even a little from the first few seasons of RTTE, Snotlout has grown and matured a lot throughout the series. But you can really tell just how much he’s grown to respect Hiccup as a leader and care/value him as a friend in this episode. He really tries to help Hiccup “fix” his gift for Astrid, even though Hiccups gift is already perfect❤️, still, the necklace idea was great. And he tells Amus they weren’t leaving without Hiccup, when in earlier shows, he definitely would of got out of there to save himself. And how he just trusts Hiccup can get them out of there instead of fighting him on it and saying he should be in charge. You can still see arrogant and obnoxious Snotlout was still there, now he’s just mature enough to realize his own strengths and Hiccups strengths. And he knew that he probably wouldn’t be too much help in this situation by coming up with a plan. I don’t know if any that made sense but I tried. I’m not good with words 🥲

I still love how Hiccup and Snotlout kept their sassy and head butting relationship though! The little comments through out this episode really made appreciate this duo more.

Snotlout: Aaargh!! I hate being confused!

Hiccup: Really? I figured you’d be used to it by now.

Snotlout: Heard that-

Snotlout: Oowww! You break this stuff it’s really sharp owowowow-

Hiccup: Then don’t break it

Snotlout: A little late for that- but thank you☺️

Snotlout: I don’t know just do what he says, he’s always right so there’s really no point.

Hiccup: What was that Snotlout?

Snotlout: You’re like a ray of light. Lighting my way. Super shiny! Never mind.

Hiccup: yeah yeah, uh huh…

Those are some of my favorite moments, but yah all in all this episode is by far my favorite. I will definitely be talking more about this series in the future so be prepared.

#httyd #how to train your dragon #rtte #race to the edge #analysis #hiccup haddock #snotlout jorgenson #season 5 episode 2 #sandbuster #hiccstrid #astrid hofferson #fishlegs ingerman #ruffnut thorston #tuffnut thorston #hookfang #stormfly #I really just love rtte #and wanted the chance to talk about snotlouts character #sorry if it’s a lot

[kookidough]

analysing vance hopper because he lives in my head 24/7 !

tw for like. literally everything the black phone covers!!!!!!

also there's some special effects gore rather far down in the post idk just i feel like i should warn you just in case

okay so before anyones like "but bee!!!! he only had 6 minutes of screen time in a 102 minute long movie!!!!! he was only on screen for 5.8% of the movie!!!!!" and to that i say i Know it was a real tragedy so a lot of this will be built on personal interpretation and subtext and stuff said behind the scenes and whatnot

so firstly i wanna rot about what his childhood/upbringing might've been like..... i havent quite decided on something definitive but i think we can take one look at his character and realise that is glaringly obvious he had a bad childhood, in one interview the actor that plays him (brady hepner) says "the background i had set up for vance is that the reason he was the way he was is his home life was fairly difficult, you know maybe his dad was either not there for him or he wasn't supportive, maybe he was fairly abusive, and so that creates a hair trigger sense of rage in vance" hair trigger meaning his patience is literally as thin as a strand of hair it does Not take a lot for him to snap

there more to it after that which i'll get into soon but yea thats the gist of it it's clear he had absent/neglectful/abusive parents and that would certainly contribute to why he's so angry all the time, maybe acting so explosive was the only way to get his parents' attention, either good or bad, so he just internalised that. obviously rage and anger issues like vance's lead to violence (not in all cases but in his case it does) and i think a neglectful and abusive upbringing would obviously expose him to more violence than a normal childhood would, therefore normalising it and desensitising him to it, whether he's seeing it play out in his own home and/or on television or something like that (because i doubt his parents would be the kind to monitor what content he's viewing)

i feel like he has little control over his life and that only adds to his anger, which in his case leads to a fight when his buttons are pushed too many times. i think he probably takes great pride in being the toughest in town and whatnot and winning fights and being perceived as strong and scary is good to him and helps him regain control/power, something he doesnt have at home. the rest of the quote from the interview i mentioned earlier states "this pinball machine could have been the only thing that he has in his heart that's like, good, like 'holy cow i did this, i set the score,' so when someone comes along and messes it up for him, it takes away the only thing that he has. i think that that's when he switches to a 'now you're gonna pay for that'"

similar to what i said about fighting, the pinball machine and his high score is something he has control over and its an important part of his reputation/image like. hes literally pinball vance ! and the whole thing about that high score being the "only thing he has in his heart that's good" implies that hes. well. pretty shit at everything else, which is pretty much canon if you remember that gwen said vance was held back twice in school. makes me think that while he's not the brightest in school he's certainly street smart

moving onto ermmmmm him getting kidnapped era because im sure youre wondering "well bee if he's so street smart then why did he get kidnapped" so may i raise two theories (this is. literally all i got and its not even concrete, me and my friend gray (@staggersz) tried to figure out how this could even happen and this is the most plausible thing we've got. so shoutout to him real quick he has had to deal with me being unnormal about vance for like a year and a half thanks king couldnt have done all this without my rotting buddy)

so either he got taken by surprise (most likely option) or vance's trust was gained first via getting given quarters at the pinball machine and small talk and shit like that but this is unlikely because i feel like it'd take a loooooong time for someone like vance to trust a some random stranger adult man when he clearly has issues with trusting and respecting people older than him and people with authority (e.g. cops, his parents, or school officials) so yea being taken by surprise would probably be the most realistic option, i always see people on tiktok being like "how did the grabber kidnap vance hes so strong!!!!" dude its a 15 year old boy against like. a 45 year old man who's already claimed two lives its really not gonna be a fair fight here

before i get into the next part i wanna quickly address a theory i absolutely Hate and it is so easily disproven and that is the theory that vance is the grabber's son or is related to him in some other way and i see it Far too often on tiktok and i HATE it. from what ive seen this all stems from his dream sequence where he kicks open the fence to albert's house and, presumably, goes inside after being dropped off by the police after the grab n go fight. idk if some people just straight up didnt realise this but clearly in real life he is going to his Own House??? in the dream it's only albert's house because this is how he chooses to show gwen the house she's trying to find her brother in, the house that he himself was killed in??? i hate the theory i hate it sm

the dream sequence itself is interesting though as the ghosts seem to only be able to conjure up what theyve seen in real life (like how bruce can picture the outside of the house and show that to gwen but the house number is all flipped and not right beause he doesnt know it) so vance being able to picture the house and the number and the gate and every detail would imply that hes seen it before, but im going to explain that away as either he got out once before like with finney's failed escape attempt, or the house is most likely on the route he walks to school or the grab n go or something and he hasnt actually been there prior to being kidnapped

mini rant over now onto being kidnapped i guess, so i used the missing posters to try and estimate a timeline of how long each ghost boy would've been in the basement for (although the missing posters are notoriously unreliable for details such as looks/height/age/etc, the dates seem to all line up). so we know the order is griffin, billy, vance, bruce, robin, finney, right?? if we use the poster date then billy was taken on may 4th, 1976, a month and two days after griffin was taken (april 2nd 1976). vance was taken on september 23rd 1977, almost a full year later (stay with me im going somewhere with this), and after that bruce was taken on july 18th 1978, again almost a full year later

its established in the movie that the grabber stalks his victims before he takes them (canon because we literally see the van watching finney and gwen as they walk home from school early on in the movie) but we dont know how long he does this for since griffin/billy and robin/finney were taken such short distances apart and then the others were taken such long distances apart, also it's possible he could stalk his next victim while the previous one is still alive, etc etc lots of confusing factors, but if i've done the maths right then the absolute maximum time vance could've spent down there is 9 months and 25 days, or 298 days, so erm . let that sink in !

howeverrrr in the movie gwen states that vance went missing "last spring" and september is definitely not in spring, meaning he could've been down there for a year or even longer. an explanation or excuse i could think of for the movie and the missing poster saying different things (other than the missing posters being known for some areas being wildly inaccurate) is that maybe he was taken in spring but wasnt labelled as officially missing until september, when he was properly linked to griffin and billy's similar disappearances and the mysterious grabber? i can imagine it'd be very easy for law enforcement, especially in the 70s, to dismiss someone like vance as a runaway until they get solid evidence that he was taken. idk though thats just my personal excuse / angsty headcanon for the difference in information

not sure what exactly killed him but we do hear from vance himself that "he took his time with me" so it was probably blood loss from a variety of injuries, if we look at him in his ghost scenes we can see his hair is absolutely covered in blood which indicates head injury, he clearly has a broken nose and bruising around his eyes as a result of it, he has these deep cuts on his abdomen area (apologies for the image quality but i believe they're like. sfx pieces you would wear under clothing)

and he also has just like. minor bruising (like the fingerprints on his arm) and other random blood splatters on his face and neck (assuming the blood down his neck comes from wherever he was bleeding on his head) so Yeah overall very unpleasant way to die obviously

okay now the part thats actually in the movie and it only took me 13 paragraphs to get here: vance as a ghost!! first thing i wanna point out is appearance wise i just want to say that when he's a ghost he's missing his choker and that fact Pains me. anyway personality-wise i feel like being violently murdered has, understandably, kicked his rage up to like. the highest level it could possibly go. he's insanely snarky and downright rude to finney on the phone, showing no empathy to the fact that finney is literally in the exact situation he was in

i feel like the whole "this is the nightmare end of your pathetic little life" and "if you knew what you had coming, you'd be fucking terrified" thing is definitely to scare finney on purpose and to get him to do something, vance might as well have just told him he's never going home cuz thats how it came across LMAOO, it is startling though because vance is clearly speaking from experience, that he was literally fucking terrified, and he is warning finney in his own weird way

the thing i think sets vance apart from the other ghosts is that while he does help finney, he does it for a different reason than they do. the other ghosts want finney to escape, to get out, to be free, to live, but personally i dont think vance cares about that. the only thing he wants is for albert shaw to be dead, for someone to seek vengeance, to do what vance couldn't. vance doesn't care if it's bruce or robin or finney or whatever boy could've come after that, he doesnt care as long as that man gets what he deserves after what he put vance through, and i see this through the scene at the end of vance's call where finney thanks him for his help and vance says, and i quote, "helping you? this isn't about you, fuck him! and apologies for being repetitive but to me it just literally proves that to vance, this isnt about finney or his escape, its just about revenge

we dont get to find out what happens to the ghosts once the credits have rolled, and i dont think we quite know enough about tbp's version of ghosts to guess what theyre up to, but i have a few theories :3 maybe theyre no longer bound to those two houses and they can now go anywhere they want in town? or maybe since their shared goal of stopping albert has been achieved, the ghosts can finally pass on to whatever is waiting for them next. i dont think vance would be content to pass on that quickly or easily as anger lingers, but i hope he'd be able to let go of it eventually, and hey we might find out in the sequel. i pray it mentions him cuz i will just die if it doesnt

sometimes, ok thats a lie, frequently i think about an au where he survived or escaped or whatever but ohhhh boy this post is already a train wreck so that au would deserve its own essay of a post :3 if u actually genuinely read this far then Wtf thanks for reading the ramblings of an absolute madman, only pure delusion could get like 20 paragraphs about a guy with 6 minutes screentime but hey thats how i roll, thanks again to my pal gray for letting me rot and thank u to my other pal ana for also enduring all this rot

hope u enjoyed my interpretation of vance hopper im going to crawl in a hole now and probably brainrot some more, thanks again for ur time :3

#the black phone #tbp #tbp vance #vance hopper #character analysis #i literally rotted my entire brain for this one #normally i hate when ppl tag characters in a post that isnt really about them im gonna tag the other characters cuz i do mention them quite #a few times so apologies to ppl that are fans of anyone that isnt vance this post is Vance Centric #tbp robin #robin arellano #tbp finney #finney blake #tbp griffin #griffin stagg #tbp billy #billy showalter #tbp bruce #bruce yamada #tbp gwen #gwen blake #the grabber #albert shaw #the black phone 2022 #i am the number 1 vance hopper fan and this proves it #if vance has 100 fans im one of them. if vance has 10 fans im one of them. if vance has 1 fan its me. if vance has no fans im dead. #sorry to everyone that followed me for total drama content i have an absolute disease for this movie and this guy #back to regularly scheduled content soon trust #not expecting this to do numbers cuz theres actually only like 4 tbp fans on earth but had to let two years worth #of absolute brainrot for this movie that has like. barely any merch and only the slightest scraps of fan content #i stayed up all night writing this

[l8rs-gat0rs]

we all saw how Steven was just entranced by Layla in the show 😭 so could you do a fic where he emotionally cheats on the reader, so when she finds out and confronts him he’s on his hands and knees begging her not to leave him, but she’s over him and leaves the apartment.

That’s all I got, you can’t choose the ending if you want

(Feel free to ignore if you’re not comfortable writing this)

The Mind Wanders

Pairing: Steven Grant x Reader

TW: Not completely sure, but the subject matter may trigger some people so I'm putting a warning in case because writing this fic did bring up shitty memories from a past toxic relationship.

(But pls don't feel bad abt requesting this anon, I loved writing it! It was so fun to create a story around your request, it really flexed my creative muscles to create a story with emotional depth like this. Also, I kinda played with the prompt a lil' bit, so she doesn't "find out" she knows, but she's in denial. I hope you're okay with that!)

Warning(s): ANGST. Emotional cheating, heartwarming fluff to cure your angsty pain <3 , Set in an AU before the events of the show, Third person, very minimal y/n use. Steven's redemption arc is told through his own POV.

Summary: you find out Steven's mind has been wandering. He's become quite entranced with another woman, and you won't stand for it. After you leave, Steven is determined to do anything, and everything to regain your trust.

Word count: 6.2k

Thank you, Anon for this request!!! <3

And credits to my dear friend Lina for helping me with this fic, and also being my proofreader. I had a little roadblock but she gave me amazing ideas for Steven's redemption arc :) her brain is amazing.

~~~~~~Enjoy!~~~~~~

You've been dating Steven long enough.

Long enough to know his tells.

Long enough to know he was lying when he said Layla was "just a friend" to him.

And that's how you got to where you are right now. Sitting at a bar downtown, drinking your feelings away.

Earlier...

You and Steven were at a coffee shop for a late afternoon coffee and tea that you suggested, just to get out of the house for a little. He was currently talking about the cutest kid that had shown up at his work.

"She was quite literally dressed as Sekhmet, and she was telling me about how she wanted to be a doctor!" Steven explained animatedly.

You smiled at the thought.

"She was absolutely adorable, I'll tell you that." He said before taking a sip of his tea.

"Yeah I'll bet she was," you chuckled.

Suddenly the bell on the coffee shop door rang and you noticed Steven immediately became attentive and sat straight up, staring at the person who just walked in.

Confused, you turned to see who it was and your face quickly turned emotionless with a hard stare. You turned back to Steven after seeing who it was.

"H-Hey, Layla!" Steven said, calling out to her name and waving. 

Layla's head turned and her eyes lit up as she noticed Steven, promoted to make her way to our table.

"Oh, hey Steven!" she said with a bright smile.

You watched Steven's face, he gave her a crooked smile and blush painted his cheeks.

When Layla noticed you, she smiled kindly and greeted you as well, "Hi y/n".

You eyed Steven’s fiddling fingers, nearly forgetting to answer, doing your best to chalk his behavior up to the crowded atmosphere.

"Hey Layla" you replied, making sure to perfectly hide your discomposed state behind a small smile.

"What brings you here Layla?" Steven asked. 

 "I was just in the neighborhood for some archeology stuff and I saw this place, so I thought I'd stop in and grab some coffee," she explained.

"Interesting, what kind of archeology stuff?" Steven asked, looking at her as if she was the goddess Isis herself.

"Well, there were some old Egyptian artifacts recently dug up at a cemetery, so they've called for me to take them and bring them back to Egypt." She seemed excited about her task.

Steven, on the other hand, looked like someone had just kicked a puppy in front of him.

You felt like grabbing him and running out of the store with him, but of course, that would be childish, so you kept your mouth shut.

 "Wait, you're going to Egypt? For how long?" Steven asked with a frown.

"A week." she said.

"Well, when are you leaving?" Steven asked, his disappointment showing through even as he tried to hide it.

"I've got a flight this Saturday actually, gotta take that Sunday to recover from the flight" she laughed.

Before Steven could say anything else, because he practically looked like he was about to beg her to take him with her, you spoke up.

"Wow, Layla that's so great! I'm really excited for you, I know you love Egypt." you said supportively.

She smiled gratefully.

"I love Egypt too!" Steven interjected, causing your jaw to clench. 

Layla giggled, causing Steven to look like he just won the jackpot.

"Yeah, I do love Egypt, I'm glad to be going back. Thanks y/n" she said kindly.

You nodded in acknowledgment, your jaw still locked, afraid that if you opened your mouth your emotions would blow up at Steven.

"Well I've got to go, but it was nice to see you both, I'll see you around," she waved at both of you before getting in line to order her coffee.

You both waved back, Steven admittedly way more animated than you, watching Layla go to the counter to order her coffee.

"Oh she's just the best isn't she? Wow, Egypt!" He exclaimed, turning back to his tea.

"Yeah, it's really cool." you said half-heartedly.

But of course, Steven didn't seem to notice anything was wrong at all, and he continued to talk about Egypt and Layla the rest of the time you were there.

You didn't hate Layla, you knew it wasn't her fault that Steven seemed to be entranced by her. Hell, she seemed as oblivious to Steven's feelings as he was to yours.

Steven had met Layla last month, when she was visiting the museum he worked at, checking out the artifacts in the ancient Egyptian exhibit. Steven introduced her to you that very same day and it didn't bother you at first, how much he talked about her. You knew he was just happy he found someone who shared his interest in ancient Egypt, you were even happy for him. On the rare occasion you three hung out, she was a great friend to you as well. But then you started to see the signs.

The way he would have stars in his eyes when he talked to her, or even about her. The way that whenever he looked at her, he looked at her like she was the only person on earth. When he listened to her speak, he was hanging onto every single word she said.

He never explicitly cheated, of course, Steven would never do that, he wouldn't even hurt a fly. At least not with intention.

He was still charming towards you and the two of you acted like a couple. There was never anything wrong, even physically.

But whenever Layla came into the mix, you became a third wheel.

The two of you left the coffee shop eventually, the sun was setting and there was a chill of winter breeze though the streets of London.

You walked together back to Steven's flat, which you had been living in for around two months now.

You smiled fondly as Steven talked in the background while you remembered the day he asked you to move in with him. It was on your 10-month anniversary, he had been so nervous he was practically shaking. You remember thinking it was a bit fast to move in, but then again,

It was Steven.

so of course you said yes.

He was still your Steven. You turned to him and smiled as he glanced at you, holding your hand with the cutest smile on his face.

The two of you took the elevator up to his flat and you entered together, Steven closing the door behind you, and locking it.

"So what would you like for dinner, lovely?" He asked, pressing a kiss to your cheek before moving to the kitchen.

"Hmmm, I don't know, surprise me." You said teasingly.

"Will do, one special surprise dinner coming right up!" Steven said excitedly, getting to work in the kitchen.

You giggled at how adorable he was as you hung your scarf up with your coat.

"Sit down and relax, I'll do all the work, don't you worry!" Steven moved, putting a pot of water on the stove to boil. 

"Alright Mr.Grant, I'll be waiting right here on the couch." You smiled,  taking your shoes off and plopping down on the couch.

He looked at you with a huge smile before turning back to grab some things out of the fridge.

You smiled and turned on Netflix to watch your current favorite show. 

About 1 episode in, Steven was finally finished with dinner.

"Alright, your special surprise dinner is ready!" He called, waving you over with his hand.

"Ooooo let's see what we have here" you wiggled your fingers after getting up from the couch and turning the tv off.

"Et Voilà!" Steven presented the plates to you.

"Wowww! Spaghetti and meatballs, real fancy!" You mockingly made fun.

"Yeah, but I bet it's the best spaghetti and meatballs you'll ever taste!" He chided.

"Well I'll be the judge of that." You joked, walking toward the table that was by the stove.

Steven moved to sit across from you. He watched you carefully as you got a slice of meatball before wrapping the spaghetti around the fork and bringing it to your mouth.

You chewed in silence for a little bit, hiding your reaction to how good it tasted.

"So? How is it?" Steven asked nervously.

"Mmmm" you looked up at the ceiling, finger to your chin, pretending to think.

He looked at you with hopeful eyes and you couldn't help the smile that broke your insightful thinking face.

"Steven, it's absolutely delicious." You said with a cheeky smile.

His face lit up into a wondrous smile and your heart melted.

"Wow, I'm so glad you like it!" He said before digging into his own plate.

The two of you continued dinner with some light small talk in between bites until you heard Steven's phone ding with a text notification.

You immediately recognized the different text tone and your soft smile disappeared as Steven immediately stuck his hand in his pocket and fetched his phone out.

He unlocked it and his eyes grew into big circles and he smiled.

"Wow Layla just sent me a picture of a gold scarab beetle that was found at the cemetery!" Steven excitedly texted Layla back.

You stared at him in silence as you watched him grinning, followed by a chuckle, and more texting.

Your eyes glanced at his half eaten plate of food and your rage started to boil over.

You couldn't take it anymore.

You threw your fork onto your plate, the silverware clanging loudly, causing Steven to jump and stare at you with wide eyes and a frown.

"Love?" He asked softly as he watched your face cautiously.

"Steven, I can't do this anymore." You told him seriously.

"Do what?" He asked, alarm quickly spreading across his features.

"This. With you. Us." You said.

"Wha- Why!?" He exclaimed.

"Steven, you don't see me! I'm right here, and you can't even see me!" You yelled exasperatedly.

"What do you mean!? I see you!" He said, desperately trying to understand what you meant.

He reached for your hand but you swiped it away from him and got up from the table abruptly.

Steven flinched before standing as well.

"No you don't Steven. All you see is Layla." You said bitterly. 

Tears burned your eyes as they threatened to spill, the words you had been thinking for months finally coming out of your mouth, and you held back those hot angry tears as you listened to them as if you were outside of your own body.

"Wha- I- no!" Steven denied, stuttering between you and his phone.

"Yes you do. I'm sitting here eating dinner with you and you're texting Layla. We're at the coffee shop, you see Layla, and she's all you can talk about. We could be having a random conversation, and you will bring up Layla!" You let out in frustration.

He stared at you dumbly and that made you even more angry.

You made your way to the door quickly, when Steven tried to grab your hand, you looked at him with a deadly stare and he took a firm hold on your arm.

"Let. Go. Of. Me." You said sharply.

"Lovey, please. You're making a mistake!" He begged.

You snatched your arm out of his hands and glared at him.

"Trust me I'm not, and don't fucking call me that anymore. I'm not going to stay in a relationship that I'm not appreciated in. You're already acting like you're dating Layla, so you might as well make it official." Your words laced with venom.

Steven flinched again and you continued,

"I tried to ignore it for so long, but I can't ignore it any longer Steven. I can't ignore the fact that you make me feel invisible!" You vocalized your rage, causing your words to crack near the end. You turned on your heel, putting your jacket and scarf on.

"Y/n please!" Steven sobbed, and you turned around, shocked to see him on his hands and knees.

"Steven get up!" You exclaimed.

No matter how angry you were at him, it broke your heart seeing him like this.

He sat up onto his knees and put his hands into the prayer position, looking up at you with tears in his eyes.

"Please don't go! Please, I promise Layla is just a friend! Y/n please, I need you, I-I can't lose you!" He begged through his tears.

Your heart felt like it was shattering into a million pieces.

You turned back around, no longer able to look at him and you reached your hand out, gripping the door handle.

"No! No no no no y/n please don't go! Give me one more chance! I'll be better!" Steven said, fully sobbing at this point.

You gripped the door handle tighter and shut your eyes tightly without giving another glance, only able to think of all the times Steven had made you feel less important than Layla.

You opened your eyes as you opened the door, hearing his sobs, pleas, and shuddering breaths grow louder.

"I'm sorry Steven, but we're over." You said coldly before you walked out the door, slamming it behind you.

You quickly sped down the hallway and got into the elevator.

When the door closed your fully tensed body sagged and you held your head in your hands and sighed deeply.

You wiped your face before opening the Uber app and calling a car.

Presently...

So yeah. That's why you're currently on your 4th drink, looking down into your cup as if it was the most interesting thing on the planet.

Your mind wandered back to Steven, the imagine of him begging you not to leave while on his hands and his knees.

You shut your eyes painfully and shook your head.

There was a time where you believed that Steven could never hurt you. His warm, innocent eyes and gentle, nervous touches made you feel safe.

You opened your eyes and scoffed at your foolishness.

He had just been too good to be true, and you should have seen it.

You glanced at your phone,

Dammit it was getting late, but your stuff was at Steven's apartment, and there was no way in hell you were going back there.

Your eyes lit up as you remembered you kept some stuff over at your best friends Rachel and Chloe's house due to your frequent sleepovers.

You went into your contacts and dialed Chloe's number.

"Hey babes, It's been a while!" Chloe said when she picked up.

You smiled softly at the sound of her Glaswegian accent through the phone.

"Hey chlo' do you think I can stay with you and Rae for a little bit?" You said sadly, embarrassed to even be asking.

"Of course love! RAE! GET THE GUEST ROOM READY, Y/N IS STAYING OVER!" You heard her scream.

"Thanks so much Chloe" you chuckled.

"Of course, you're always welcome here!" She exclaimed.

"And one more thing?" You whispered sheepishly.

"Sure," she said, egging you on to continue speaking.

"Can you come pick me up from the bar downtown that we usually go to? I'm kiiiiinda drunk." You asked, apologetic.

"Oh god, we'll be there in 5" Chloe replied before hanging up.

You snorted and let your head fall against the bar, waiting for them to come pick you up.

You lifted your head for a second to pay and tip the bartender, before you laid your head back down after letting the bartender know you were waiting for your friends to come pick you up.

He took your money, thanked you for the tip, and nodded in acknowledgement, telling you to get home safe then moved on to serve another customer.

Chloe and Rae texted you when they arrived in front of the bar and you stumbled out.

You opened the door, and collapsed into the seat before shutting the door behind you.

You threw your head back and groaned.

"Jesus you look like absolute shit." Rae said, turning around in her seat to look at you.

"Did something happen with Steven?" Chloe asked, acknowledging you through the rear view mirror.

"Just drive," you groaned.

You told them what had happened with Steven during the car ride and they listened sympathetically.

"I told you to break up with him sooner, he's a proper bag of shit." Rae said.

You shook your head and sighed, going quiet for the rest of the ride. Your friends respected your silence.

When you got to their house, they brought you to your room and you noticed they left you a fresh set of clean pajamas to wear.

"God, I love you guys!" You yelled through the door.

"Yup!" You heard Chloe say and you giggled before changing your clothes.

When you came out of the room you saw 3 small tubs of ice cream with 3 different colored spoons in them on the coffee table in front of the tv, Chloe and Rae beacons you over to the couch. 

You plopped down in between them and pulled them into a group hug.

"I fuckin love you guys, you know that right?" You said sincerely.

"Yeah we know." Rae teased, causing the three of you to chuckle.

"Now what are we watching!" Chloe announced once the three of you pulled away from the hug.

....

The next couple of days were rough, but you got through them. You had gone back to Steven's apartment while he was at work and gathered some clothes and your important things. You'd come back for the other stuff later.

Steven surprisingly did not try to contact you but you did notice his flat seemed to be even more messy than usual. You also noted the several crumpled-up sheets of paper that you were pretty sure you knew the contents of. You shook your head sadly, trying not to feel bad for him. He was the one who hurt you, and the best thing for you now was to just move on and heal from it.

You grabbed your car keys, locked the door behind you and picked the boxes up before taking them back into your car, driving back to your temporary residence.

You silently cursed yourself for selling your old flat, but you couldn't keep paying rent for a place you didn't even live at. You thought you and Steven were in it for the long haul.

You got back to Chloe and Rae's place and brought the boxes to your room.

You sat on your bed with a sigh and started unpacking.

Steven's Pov

Steven walked into his flat and sighed at its emptiness. He missed seeing you smile at him and get up from your laptop to greet him and give him a kiss.

It had been approximately a week since you had stormed out of his apartment. He removed his coat and after placing his work bag down, he paused for a second to look around before he realized...

You had been here while he was at work, and took most of your stuff with you.

Tears started to well up in his eyes once again.

He took his shoes off and walked over to his bed with his shoulders sagged, then stepped over the ring of sand so he could lay down.

He remembered the first time you came to his apartment. He had thought of so many excuses to tell you when you would inevitably ask about the sand around his bed, as well as the ankle restraint.

When you finally set foot into his apartment, he went into full panic mode and started a word vomit.

You had stopped him before his head exploded and said you didn't care about anything weird he did because it didn't define him. You didn't care if he had a sleeping condition, or if there were books covering every possible surface of his flat. You promised him that day, you would never judge him.

He stared at his ceiling as the tears rolled down the side of his eyes and into his hairline.

You had always seen him, and you had made him feel that way.

Seen.

He thought back to what you said the day you left:

"Steven, you don't see me! I'm right here, and you can't even see me!"

His eyes were blurry as more tears welled up.

He hated himself for making you feel that way, he couldn't believe he didn't see he was hurting you.

He scoffed at himself,

it's been a week and he's still crying over you.

He sat up, wiping his eyes.

He looked around again and remembered the whole week it had taken for you and Steven to clean up his flat so it could be in the state that it was currently in.

You had told him to stop apologizing over 50 times as the two of you organized all his books so they were no longer scattered over every surface.

You had done so much for Steven without him ever even asking.

His heart ached as he glanced at the empty space in his bed where you used to sleep, right next to him every night.

He hadn't bothered to contact you in fear of you blocking him.

His phone buzzed and he quickly checked it desperately to see if you texted him.

It was Layla.

He frowned and put his phone back down, not bothering to check her text.

He hadn't meant to make it seem like he was interested in Layla, she was just the first person he ever met that shared his interest in the things he was most passionate about.

You didn't happen to be as passionate, but you also shared Steven's interests in Ancient Egyptian mythology. In fact that was how the two of you met, at the museum.

Almost the same exact way as how he met Layla.

His heart felt heavy, here he was, comparing the two of you. He was such a bloody knob.

You deserved so much better.

He could be better.

He furrowed his brows,

but how was he supposed to tell you or show you that?

He had no clue where you were even staying because he remembered you told him you sold your flat after you moved in with him.

Guilt wracked his whole body.

He thought hard about hotels in the area-

Wait.

Your best friends!

Steven grabbed his phone and checked his texts between the two of you.

He scrolled up until he saw you mention them, you had asked him to pick you up from their house when you were drunk.

He blushed heavily as he remembered what happened that night after he picked you up.

There, you had sent him the address!

He copied the address from your text and input it into his GPS.

You were staying only a couple miles from him.

The next day, Steven put on his best button up and went to the shop. He bought a stuffed animal Paddington the bear since he remembered Paddington was your favorite movie, also the reason you moved to London. He also bought a small bag of your favorite chocolates.

As Steven made his way to your current residence at your friend's place, he kept going over what he planned to say to you.

When the Uber finally arrived he was shocked out of his thoughts when the driver announced they had arrived at his destination.

He thanked them and got out, grabbing the gifts and clutching them tightly as he stared at the house that you were hopefully in.

He felt sweaty but he was determined to show you he changed.

He made his way up to the house and gingerly knocked on the door.

One of your friends opened the door.

…Which one was this?

Right, Chloe!

"H-Hello Chloe, is y/n here?" He said looking past her, trying to see inside the house.

She glared at him and covered the open space with the door, blocking his view.

"No, she's not actually, and even if she was, she doesn't want to see you anymore, so don't come here again." She said, whispering angrily at him.

Steven frowned.

"Who's at the door Chlo'?" Steven heard the sound of your melodic voice hit Steven's ears and he perked up, his eyes widening.

"It's NO ONE, just a salesman," Chloe replied, making sure Steven knew he was not welcome.

"Don't come back here again Steven, or you'll regret it." she whisper-snapped to him again.

"Why'd you say 'no one' like that?" Steven heard you say before Chloe shut the door in his face.

Steven deflated and sighed.

He would have to think of something else.

Your pov

"Because, it was no one, now get back to writing, or whatever you're doing. That's what you do for your job right?" she said, dismissing you.

"Okay mom!" you relented, rolling your eyes.

She went to the bathroom to get ready for work, and you quickly put your laptop down and ran to the window to see who was at the door.

Your heart dropped to your stomach as you saw Steven, walking dejectedly down the street holding a teddy bear and what you could tell was a bag of your favorite chocolates.

Alright, maybe it was better Chloe didn't let you talk to him, what would you even say to him?

Even the thought of talking to Steven was too painful for you so you shoved it down and went back to writing.

....

A few days later, you were on your laptop getting some work done. You started to feel hungry, so you decided to grab a snack. Chloe and Rae were both at work, but they would be home in one-two hours, and you would all have dinner together.

Rae promised she was bringing home burgers and fries tonight so you didn't have to cook.

To say you were excited was an understatement.

You carefully gathered the ingredients to make yourself a quesadilla.

You hummed to your current favorite song that's been stuck in your head for a while now as you prepared your food.

Once you were done, you cleaned up after yourself and took your food to your bedroom to eat it. (Chloe and Rae didn't need to know)

You were sitting up against the headboard, scrolling through your phone when you heard a knock at the window.

Your heart was beating in your chest as you heard it again, more rapidly and you turned to look at the window.

There was a shadow of a person behind the curtain.

You slowly put your plate on the side table and grabbed scissors out of a jar with pencils and pens.

You held it in a stabbing position as you made your way towards the window slowly, terror gripping your heart, while the person on the other side rapidly banged their knuckles against the window.

You breathed in slowly and closed your eyes before opening them and quickly pulling the curtain away and raising the scissors in a stabbing motion.

Your eyes widened and you gasped as you saw Steven hanging on for dear life to the side ledges of the window.

You quickly dropped the scissors and opened the window.

"Steven what the fuck!? how did you even get up here?" you shouted, staring at him in shock.

"Well, I did climb up the pipeline but In retrospect that was a terrible idea once I got this far up to your window." he said, looking at you in fear.

He looked down at his feet trying to secure his footing but his foot slipped and he wobbled, his eyes going fully round.

"Oh shi-!" He said, losing his balance,

before he could fall backward your reflexes kicked in and you grabbed his arm pulling him inside your room, causing him to topple inside and on top of you.

You both stared at each other with wide eyes as he was on all fours, hands and legs on either side of your head and body.

Your breathing slowed and you found yourself getting lost in Steven's round puppy dog eyes as the shock wore off.

You suddenly became hyperaware of the position you were in and your body heated up as you started to blush heavily, you noticed the same happened to Steven.

"Oh, uhhh, lemme just-" you started rambling and shifting and he mumbled some words of an apology as he scrambled to get off of you.

Once you got up, you stood a couple steps away from Steven and stared at him as he took the backpack he was wearing off.

You just watched him silently as he took out the same stuffie of paddington and bag of chocolates from the other day.

He held them out to you and stared at you, silently pleading you to take them.

You did, placing them on your bed.

Steven shuffled nervously on his feet and you crossed your arms with furrowed brows.

"Steven, I just, I have so many questions." You said angrily.

He opened his mouth to speak but you cut him off.

"One, why are you here? Two, how did you even know this was my room? And three, how did you know I was even in here?" You asked, exasperatedly.

You could see from his face that a million different thoughts were running through his head before he spoke up.

"Okay, well, I'm here because I need to talk to you. I knew this was your room and you were in here because I came here another time. And I waited till Chloe and Rachel went to work so I could actually talk to you, then I tried to knock on the door but Chloe forgot her bag and came back so I hid, then l heard the two of you talking because the window was open and Chloe said "well, this is your room" and I knew you were in here today because I saw you close the curtains when I got here." He quickly jumbled all of his answers together.

"Oh, and I didn't come through the door because... well... I wanted to surprise you. You know, be all romantic and stuff." He added sheepishly.

You just stared at him appalled.

"A-And I know I probably sound insane!" he said quickly after seeing your reaction.

"Yeah, you do. And you need to leave Steven." You said pointedly.

"No y/n! you need to understand, I did this all for you! because I can't live without you!" he tried explaining desperately.

Your hardened expression softened a bit but you stayed quiet.

Steven looked relieved when he noticed you let him speak, and he cleared his throat to look at you.

"y/n I'm so sorry I hurt you and made you feel the way I did. I didn't mean to, honestly! I was just so excited when I met Layla because she was an archeologist and she was interested in ancient Egypt and she's passionate about it just like me. So excited that I might have been too blind to see how I was hurting you. I'm so sorry that I ever made you feel unseen. I could never love Layla like I love you. These past few weeks without you have been hell. The flat feels so cold and empty. I smell your perfume on the sheets but you're not there when I go to bed or wake up. Your smile used to make my whole world shine and it's been dark ever since you left. And I know you deserve way better than me, I was a total knob, but if you will have me back y/n, I promise, for the rest of my life, I will make it my mission, to make you feel happy every day, even on the worst days. And feel free to tell me to bugger off, I'll understand and I'll never contact you again I promise. You know, if you love someone let them go, and all that."

The whole time he spoke he was looking into your eyes until his last two sentences. He was hoping so desperately that you would hear, see, and feel the sincerity in his words. You could tell. Honestly, you were just surprised he didn't stutter that entire time. But you could tell by the fact that he couldn't look at you when he said it, how painful it was for him to think you could reject him.

Again, you had dated long enough,

Long enough to know his tells,

Long enough to know he was telling the truth about everything he told you just now.

And you knew he was willing to accept the fact that he could lose you.

For you.

He was still the same puppy-eyed man who came up behind you to explain the hieroglyphs on a pillar you were looking at, just to impress you.

He was still the man who apologized to his fish when he bumped into the tank.

He was still, your Steven.

you looked down and your feet and let out a small chuckle at your thoughts.

When you looked back up at Steven, you saw he was positively beaming.

"God I've missed that beautiful melody." He said softly, tears forming in his eyes.

You smiled, your own tears forming as he walked closer to you, slowly.

You smiled, two streaks running down your face as you noticed his tears fall from his eyes.

When he stood directly in front of you, he put one hand on your cheek and held it there. His touch was so fragile, as though he thought if he held you too hard, you might break.

"Can I hug you?" He asked softly.

You nodded and he wrapped his arms around you.

You reciprocated the hug, slowing your breathing, trying to control your tears.

Steven hurt you, and he realized his mistake, nearly too late. But here he was now. doing everything in his power to rectify his mistake, promising you that he would never make you feel that way ever again. Shit, he almost fell from the 2nd floor trying to apologize.

You squeezed him tighter, and he squeezed you back.

"Thank you Steven" you whispered.

When the two of you slowly pulled away from each other, your tears finally stopped, and so had Steven's.

He wiped your tears away gently.

"Don't thank me y/n, I shouldn't have given myself a reason to apologize in the first place." He said with his hands still cupping your face.

After a beat of silence, he finally spoke up.

"So does this mean you'll move back in with me?" Steven asked hopefully.

You laughed, causing a smile to spread across Steven's face.

"Just shut up and kiss me." grabbing his face, you pressed your lips to his.

He gladly shut up and kissed you back, melting into you, you even felt his body press closer to you. You felt the dried tears on his cheeks against your face.

When you pulled away, you were both slightly panting for air, and Steven pressed his forehead to yours, holding your hands in his.

You both closed your eyes and stayed like that for a while.

When the two of you pulled away from each other you turned, looking at the things he bought you.

You held his hand and led him to your bed, sitting down next to them.

You picked up the bear and smiled at it.

"You remembered how much I love Paddington." you said, turning to look at him.

He smiled fondly at you and nodded.

"The little bear that brought you to me."

Your heart practically melted.

You put the Paddington bear down and picked up the bag of chocolates.

"And you remembered my favorite" you grinned at him, holding up the bag.

"Of course, I can never forget the beautiful noises you make every time you eat one of those." he said, blushing immediately after he said it.

"You felt your face heat up as well and you hid your face in your hands, smiling sheepishly.

You felt his hands gently grab your hands to move them away from your face.

You felt yourself get lost in Steven's eyes, the color of them matching your favorite chocolate. Reminding you that coincidentally, Steven had the power to make those same noises come from your mouth.

You were so close you could feel Steven's breath on your lips.

Suddenly you heard the door open and you both jumped back from each other.

"y/n!!!" you heard Chloe call your name, dragging it out.

"We're home! and we bought the food!" you heard Rae say excitedly.

"Shit!" you jumped up from the bed, causing Steven to the same.

"Okay, okay uhhhhh" you said quickly looking around.

"I'll talk to them first, so they don't jump you, and then I'll call you downstairs, okay?" you said quickly with your hands on his shoulders.

"Okay, I got it." Steven nodded.

"Alright great" you said rushing to open the door.

"Y/n!" Steven whisper-yelled your name causing you to pause and turn around.

"Yeah?" you whisper-yelled back.

"I love you." He reminded with a small smile.

You almost physically melted at his cuteness.

"I love you too."

You closed the door softly as you heard Chloe call your name again as she looked for you.

“Coming!”

#steven grant x you #steven grant #moon knight fanfic #layla el faouly #steven grant x y/n #steven grant x reader #fluff #angst!!! #lots of emotions tbh #Sorry this took so long anon! #I hope you like it! #My longest fic ever actually #anon #fanfic request #fanfiction #fanfic #oscar isaac fanfiction #oscar isaac characters #ugh this was so fun to write

[bassettmemes]

SCREAM VI SENTENCE STARTERS ↳ spoilers will be present and are tagged as such. general horror movie trope trigger warnings apply. death/murder, mentions of blood/gore, etc.

we have to finish the movie.

who gives a fuck about the movie?!

i always wanted to stick something in you, [name]!

this is creepy, right?

he's after me! he's got a knife!

the worst part is: you teach a class about slashers, and you still walked into a dark alley. alone.

[name] wouldn't be caught dead at a frat party.

get me a drink!

we said we wouldn't use the voice modulator on each other.

it was even better than we ever even imagined.

is that why you killed her? because she gave you a c-?

come on, [name]. how long have we known each other?

why are you fucking with me?

you know what? this is stupid.

what i'm really worried about is [name].

every time i push you for specifics, you shut down.

i have trust issues.

my father was a famous serial killer. they made a movie about him.

last year i found out that my boyfriend was also a serial killer.

i stabbed him 22 times and slit his throat, and then shot him in the head. that's not why i'm here.

it felt... right.

i'm not equipped to deal with this kind of thing.

by law, i'm required to report this to the authorities.

who the fuck is [name]?!

she went to the omega kappa beta party.

i cannot speak to how heavily armed [name] is at this fraternity party.

it doesn't bother you? being at a house party after you were almost brutally murdered at a house party?

i guess i should stay close to you, then.

why don't you get your fucking hands off her?

i'm just gonna tase you in the balls real quick.

don't ever lay hands on my sister.

are you fucking kidding me?

you embarrassed me!

if i wanna hook up with an asshole, that's my decision!

you're not dealing with what happened to us!

i'm uninterested in living in the past like you are.

so you're just gonna pretend like it never happened?

i'm just trying to look out for you.

you can't do it for the rest of my life, though. you have to let me go.

i think you're really special.

did i cockblock you?

please stop saying the word cock.

i can't help but notice you're covered in cherry coke.

being famous isn't all it's cracked up to be.

the last two people who fucked with us ended up dead.

do you have alibis for earlier tonight?

i met [name] at that party. where i tased someone. unrelated.

i take a special interest in ghostface attacks...

we share a certain history...

do you think you're the reason the ghostface killer has come to the big apple?

stay away from us.

are you really still mad at me?

i heard you couldn't sell the movie rights.

you called me unstable and a born killer.

maybe you're just afraid that without ghostface in your life, you're gonna fade away.

what's a requel?

you're beautiful, sweetie. hold all questions until the end.

am i gonna die a virgin?

that was a weird overshare...

why am i on the suspect list?

the slutty roommate: a horror movie classic.

never trust the love interest.

what if the trauma you all went through made one, or more, of you snap?

that's pretty messed up.

it's like he's leaving us real-life franchise easter eggs.

it's like he's counting down to something.

forget about the movies; the movies don't matter.

did you just give us a nickname?

you can't just give yourself a nickname, dingus.

we have all been through some really fucked up stuff and we are all coping with it differently.

we're a team.

i've been sleeping with cute boy from across the hall.

i freaking knew it! i knew it, i knew it, i knew it!

yeah, she's my roommate, but you're, like, the police.

she's really freaked out.

oh, fuck, that guy's dead!

say something more positive!

you fuck with my family, you die.

sorry i punched you...

when did they start letting children into the fbi?

you look like a zygote.

i'm just really good at my job. you'll get there.

it's not just a theater, it's a shrine.

how did they get all this? isn't this evidence?

i had a crush on corey feldman...

okay. game recognize game.

when do i get to be a normal person again?

my parents suck to. you can still make your own family.

technically i did die. four minutes.

when i recovered, i got mad. i didn't want to spend the rest of my life being afraid of monsters. i wanted the monsters to be afraid of me.

bitch, last time i saw you, you were in glee club.

did you really think we were gonna steal a police car and not use the sirens?

that's a cop car! you can't steal a cop car!

spoiler alert: it never works out for the dipshit in the mask.

i'm scared.

i'll just give myself up. if this is what i have to do to keep you safe, it's worth it.

none of us would even be alive if it weren't for you.

he's gonna keep coming after us.

we want to lure him to a secure location and lure him inside.

and then we execute him. are you gonna help us?

let's kill the son of a bitch.

god damn it, i got it wrong again. what the fuck?

fuck this franchise.

don't trust anyone, remember?

you're not woodsboro. i'm sorry.

i cleared the whole place before you got here.

we turned it into a kill box.

we're safe here.

grab a weapon and clear this place yourself.

[name] has been on a downward spiral since the woodsboro murders last year.

they fired [name] two months ago for being mentally unstable. they're no longer with the fbi.

it's [name], they're the killer!

smile for the camera, motherfucker!

"dying" was a good way to get off the suspect list.

i got stu macher's mask. he was my favorite.

this is what we've been counting down to, [name].

fuck you!

i didn't commit those murders in woodsboro!

all the best lies are based on the truth.

there's the fucking killer.

we had to kill those two wannabe film students, because, well, we had to kill you first.

he was so pathetic.

looks like you're down another sibling.

always gotta shoot 'em in the head.

what's your favorite scary movie? i'm asking because you're in one now.

you're in my movie.

my father was a murderer. no matter what you think, i'm better than that.

i promise you i'm going to get so much therapy after this.

we're all part of the same fucked up family now.

did i miss the monologue again?!

#scream 6 sentence starters #scream vi sentence starters #scream six sentence starters #sentence starters #sentence starter #rp prompts #roleplay prompts #rp prompt #writing prompts #writing prompt #horror prompts #horror sentence starters #scream 6 spoilers // #scream vi spoilers // #spoilers // #long post //

[rabbithaver]

i finally decided to actually write out some of my major headcanons for Silver. i like him a lot as a character and i think people overlook him too much lmao

I genuinely believe that Silver has been decoupled from the timeline completely. This means that changes to the future made in the present do not affect him. He may not remember the specific events of 06, but he absolutely remembers growing up in an apocalypse and frequently has lines that support this in the comics. Him being unaffected by changes to the timeline explains why his personal history has not changed, despite the future being saved multiple times. ALSO, Ian Flynn has confirmed that Silver is not in control of when or how he travels through time -- I believe that whatever or whoever is sending him back and forth is the same thing that separated him from the timeline.

Silver is deaf, pushing about 70% hearing loss. It's not congenital -- his hearing sucks because he's from a timeline where things blew up constantly and he had no hearing protection. He relies mostly on lip-reading and guesswork, but wants to learn ASL when he gets a chance... if he gets the chance. Time is wibbly-wobbly for him. (I should note that this one is personal to me -- I myself am HoH due to otosclerosis and I'm definitely projecting my declining hearing on him lmao)

I know Silver is canonically the exact same height and weight as Shadow and Silver, but I personally don't find that very... likely. All three of these dudes are 3'3" and 77lbs EXACTLY? Nah. Shadow and Sonic, maybe, but not Silver. I headcanon Silver as being smaller and lighter than the other hedgehogs because he grew up in a timeline where food was hard to find, and thus didn't grow as much. He's very scrawny and basically has almost no meat on his bones, but you'd never guess because he's got The Fluff.

Elaborating on the food thing: his relationship with eating is probably totally screwed. Think about it: he spent his whole youth eating whatever he could get his hands on, and he probably had to eat as quickly as he could so he could stay on the move. The idea of eating to enjoy the flavor is like, completely alien to him. He also tends to stash food away for later, as he's not used to knowing when his next meal will be. He does it entirely out of habit, even when food is abundant.

Silver's immune system probably sucks. Every time he goes back to the past, he catches some illness. This is largely because he's not used to the pathogens 200 years earlier, but I also like to imagine this is because he's got some sort of autoimmune disorder.

You cannot tell me this boy does not have asthma. I am aware that this is kind of a fandom in-joke, but it makes total sense. If he grew up in a world of smoke and flames, his lungs probably look like burnt toast. Someone get him an inhaler please.

Silver has PTSD and severe anxiety, both due to his personal history growing up in a hellscape and also because repeatedly going back to the future to find his time in disarray due to events in the present is probably traumatic as all hell. His biggest trigger is most likely building collapse, but I can't imagine he doesn't have kind of a hard time with explosions after the Eggman War. His cheerful optimism and helpful attitude is his effort to deflect from his trauma.

Expanding on the anxiety thing; Silver struggles when he doesn't have something to do. We actually see this in canon in the 2022 Annual story "Future Growth." He has no idea how to function when he doesn't have a mission to focus on. Being in the past with no clear directive is insanely triggering for him and he totally fails to cope.

While I'm talking about his mental illnesses, I want to make it explicitly clear: he is REALLY good at hiding this stuff. His friends in the Resistance/Restoration don't find out about his issues for years, and this is specifically because he instinctually hides anything that could be perceived as a weakness. He's been conditioned to hide any and all weaknesses because it was the only way to survive in the post-apocalypse. Being visibly affected by your trauma is a quick and easy way to get dead, so he simply... doesn't. This kid cannot stop masking his trauma at all until he's literally at his breaking point.

There is no way he doesn't have intense Survivors' Guilt. Going back to the Metal Virus arc in the comics, he's the only survivor of a shuttle crash in Issue #25. All of those people died. They actually died - if they were zombots, they would've survived that crash, but because they were still healthy, they didn't have the ability to recover. Silver probably feels that because he was trying so hard to get survivors to the shuttle, he led those people to their deaths. I specifically am pointing to his dialogue here as evidence of this:

He probably dreads going back to the future. Like, think about it. He's admitted to being lonely (IDW #8) in his own time -- probably because his history separates him from the average person! The only friends he really has are in the past, the vast majority of whom are likely long dead by the time he's born. And while his friends are always happy to see him, I can imagine he has a lot of anxiety thinking about the fact that they inevitably start to associate his arrival with something bad coming down the line. That's rough, buddy.

He's very proud of his ruff and he takes really good care of it. It's super thick and very soft. However, when he's having a rough time, he's not as thorough, and it tends to show. If you know him really well, you can get an idea of his current mental health just by looking at the state of his chest fur. A happy Silver is fluffy, a struggling Silver looks like he was left in the washing machine.

Silver has a really hard time with media that involves apocalyptic worlds. He knows that it's just fiction, but it reminds him of the fact that he's the only one who remembers the apocalyptic hellscape he grew up in. It reminds him that as much as his friends want to support him, they can't truly understand what he's been through; his background is only real to him. It just leaves him feeling lonely and sad, so he avoids it as much as possible.

Silver doesn't sleep well in real beds. Maybe it's just a lifetime of growing up surrounded by an apocalypse, but he has a really hard time getting comfortable in a real bed. For months during the Eggman War, he'd spend hours tossing and turning before finally giving up and curling up on the floor in a corner. It's just not what he's used to at all.

anyway i think about him a normal amount :)

#terin.txt #silver the hedgehog #sonic the hedgehog #sonic headcanons #idw silver

[cirilla-fiona-riannon]

Secret in your Heart

These translations are not intended as a replacement for the game. Please support Cybird by buying their stories. Expect grammatical errors. Not 100% accurate.

Kate: "Here's today's report."

Victor: "Thank you, Kate. I received it as instructed."

Seeing Victor's smiling face didn't make my heart any lighter.

(Maybe it's because the mission I accompanied him on today was so gruesome. I should get back before I worry him.)

Kate: "Then, I一"

Victor: "Kate, I actually have a new magic trick I want you to see."

He cheerfully cut me mid-sentence, and I nodded.

Victor: "Really? Then, let me show you."

Victor: "Pay attention, okay? Here's an empty teacup."

Kate: "It's empty."

Victor: "Right? But when I hold out my hand like this..."

Victor: "Ta-daa! There's now a hot coffee inside!"

Victor's teacup was indeed steaming hot, but一

Kate: "Um. It's tea, not coffee."

Kate: "But it's still amazing!"

Victor: "Ah geez! I've made another mistake!"

No matter how many failed magic tricks he performed, Victor's cheerfulness still made me smile.

Kate: "Fufu. Can I have this? So it won't go to waste."

Victor: "Yeah, that would make me feel better."

As I sipped the warm tea, my heart felt a little relaxed.

(Speaking of which...)

Kate: "Why did you start doing magic tricks?"

Victor: "Hm?"

Kate: "I was just wondering if something triggered it."

Victor: "Yeah. Actually, Her Majesty was the trigger."

Victor: "When she had just ascended to the throne, she secretly visited the slums."

Victor: "I heard that Her Majesty decided to learn magic tricks to make one child there smile."

Victor: "Not sure if she was able to make that child smile, but she still does magic tricks from time to time."

Kate: "Why is that?"

Victor: "A country is made up of a group of people."

Victor: "She told me it was to help her remember how difficult and important it is to make one person smile."

Victor: "As her right-hand man, I, too, must not forget that. So, I do magic tricks to imitate her."

Victor: "Also, if I learn some magic tricks, I might be able to attract everyone in the crown and you!"

Victor: "I rarely talk about this stuff, so keep it a secret, okay?"

(I see, so she was the trigger.)

At that moment, a frustrating sadness welled up in my heart.

Victor: "Kate?"

Kate: "I was just feeling a little jealous."

Victor: "Jealous?"

Kate: "I'm always learning things from you."

Kate: "That's why I envy Her Majesty for teaching you something."

Kate: "Wait, it's disrespectful to have these feelings for the Queen."

Victor: ".........."

Victor: "Kate, you've taught me so much."

Kate: "----?"

Victor: "Cheerfulness, earnestness, diligence一"

Victor: "And the way you try not to let people know you're struggling after a tough mission."

(No way.)

(Did he see through all that?)

Smiling at my surprise, he offered me a set of cards.

Victor: "Now, here's a quick fix for that magic trick I did earlier. Draw a card from this deck of cards."

From the 52 cards lined up in his hand, I pulled one out, and the card I chose was一

Kate: "Ace of Hearts."

Victor: "Oh? I've got proof that you stole my heart."

As I grew even more surprised, his jewel-like eyes sparkled, and his mischievous and charming smile deepened, making it hard for me to resist.

(I wonder what kind of person does this guy love from the bottom of his heart?)

I started thinking about that.

Fin.

#ikemen villains #ikemen villain #ikevil victor #ikevil #cybird #ikevil translations

[soullikethesea]

I think I'm in some kind of reenactment with T.

The thing that keeps occurring is that I get disappointed by something she neglects to do & then I feel super upset and want to lash out and can barely contain it (and IF I express it, it comes out as "never mind my question"). I sort of angrily retreat, because the insecurity of waiting totally trips me up.

The things in the last few sessions: she neglected to tell me that she'll have to cancel some of our appointments (and I planned around them to have my trip), so now we will have to have a sudden long break. Found out about this at the very end of the session, got very upset when I got home. Thankfully there was another session before the long break, arguably that makes it better. She also said she wasn't sure about one date and that maybe we could see each other next week.

I found it super hard to contain how sad and out of control I felt about this (it just triggered old stuff about my dad). So I tried arranging that other session, it was not possible. Nor was that date she wasn't sure about earlier. I felt more confused and hurt about the false hope. Emailed about how triggered I was, T replied with an email she meant to send weeks ago. The email from weeks ago actually met some needs, because it gave us things to work on.

Which involved writing confrontational letters for my parents. I did that. Got very triggered, had a period of very little sleep. Slowly got more functional again. I think the letters are a good starting point to work more on this topic. So I was hoping we could discuss them in that one session before the break.

But then it turned out that T had missed that email and hadn't read them. Since it was basically the most important topic for me, she asked if she could read during the session. So she read one of them while I was... idk, sitting there. And then she got all misty-eyed. We couldn't really get into what it meant to me, because I was super numb and disconnected and she was basically crying about how bad it all had been. Since we were quite disconnected from each other, I'm not sure if it was helpful. It just felt like "yeah, OK, now you realize how bad it was, but it doesn't change anything. I already went through it. It already happened and that is when I was alone. I've already dealt with it, alone. I've already tried telling you about this for years and I'm honestly surprised my words apparently didn't make an impact until now."

But I could tell that T was really trying and that also made me feel more mild. She did say some helpful things about the extent of the neglect and what effects it has on me. Time ran out and there was still the letter for my mother left. She asked if there was something she could do for me and said that I can email her and ask for replies. She also said she will still read the other letter and send me a reply. I thanked her and said that would be great, because right now we're still in that topic and in a month both of us will probably not remember. Given her work schedule, I expected her to take care of it that day or maybe the next.

Still no reply, and I'm getting quite triggered again. Why did she say she was going to do it? She didn't have to say that, you know. It would've given me more peace of mind not to be "waiting" like this. The thing is, I feel very ashamed of that letter. So now I wish I'd never sent it and never asked her to read it, nor agreed that she would.

Another reenactment of the same sort of situation. At least I'm realizing that now. So I think the best I can do is to let it go. I'm not sure how to do that, but I will try my best. She's only human, she's probably getting sucked into the reenactment same as me. I'm going to let it go and I'm going to count on myself. Just like I know how to do. I was trained for this, Lucas says. And a break is not the end of the world. I will let things flow as they go, and not try to force having support. It's not there in the way I wish it could be, and it's not there in words matching actions, but there is support out there in the world. I'm in a relatively good position now in my daily life and perhaps that fact in itself can already serve as support.

#plus I also feel supported by you guys

[muffinrecord]

It looks like Scene 0 Sayaka is basically required for Despair Albertine, which kind of sucks. I'm glad that they made content where a tank is super important and critical to have, but I wish it wasn't just one specific tank in the whole fucking game.

It also sucks because (I'm assuming) you'll need to get her with more than one slot, cause. tank. Although... she gets survive for three fucking turns on doppel, which is impressive as hell. Hmm.. I have her at one slot... Could it work...?

...

No you probably def need more than one slot, possibly three+ on her for it to work. I'm guessing you don't want to trigger that survive earlier than you need to-- and from what I'm reading, you want to use her doppel every three turns, so it's important to have good mp stuff (and defense?) on her (I assume).

But you know what, good for Sayaka. She finally has an alt where she's good for something (sorry Sayaka, I say this with love-- it's not her fault that her alts have mostly kind of sucked).

I kind of wish she was useful for more than one despair boss fight (maybe two fights?) that gives you a whole total of one magia stone, but it's a start.

I think I'd prefer if we got fights that made you want to use tanks without requiring only one specific limited one for the future though.

I'm not really sure how you fix the tank issue though without just buffing older tanks to be better. I think Sasara's memoria is a great start, but I honestly have no idea how I'd try to fix Kirika's kit. Kirika's whole thing was supposed to be a sort of blast-tank, who could tank hits but still supply blast discs and a sort of decent (but not really) damage contribution. Where does she fit into the game these days? If I was going to give her a special sparkly memoria, what would it be that could make her viable?

I kind of want to say something silly, like her defense/hp turns into damage for one turn. Literally would be the scenario of "the best defense is a good offense." Don't need to worry about tanking if you fucking kill everyone! Also would be kind of fun to stack nothing but defense up and damage cut and then hit max damage or something stupid like that (in my dreams).

Anyways, I want more tank content that doesn't just require the latest girl for it to be good.

#Scene Zero #Magia Record

[pinkyjulien]

🌈 Queerness in CyberPunk 2077

I wanted to make this post earlier this month but got caught up in modding shenanigans, as per usual~

BUT! It's still June, still pride, so here it is :>

▶ DISCLAIMER

All of this is my analyses, headcanons, of different characters, some of them not confirmed at all in anyway or form! I'm a queer man myself, but I do not claim to know everything about queerness and being queer, everyone experience the game and interpret the characters differently 🤲 This is only my opinions, based off canon game events, clues, hints, as well as developpers's tweets, streams, files datamining etc etc Please do not see this thread as an attack, or as something invalidating! I'm more than curious to heard what you think about my personal analyses, if you agree, if you don't, and why! If you think other characters also display hints of queerness I'd love to hear it too! 💙

This picture is an update I did in 2022 of lil collage I did back in 2021~

I posted the first version on Reddit back in 2021 and it created this whole "what do mean JOHNNY is GAY?" (because a rainbow behind a man automatically means he's Gay and nothing else right) and a lot of biphobia over his character in particular (gasp- THE rockerboy?! Biseggsual?? In my viddy game??)

▶ You can look at the thread here and have a lil laugh

SO, NATURALLY, after doing the 2022 collage, I went and uploaded it to reddit once again! Because triggering bigots and seeing them stumble over their own tongues trying to debunk everything is really funny ✨

However, I instantly muted the thread and let it rot in its own sauce for some days, weeks, only coming back to it later and Oh Boy 👀

I did a thread on Twitter last year exploring everything that was said on the thread and explaining why I put certain characters on it

Thought it'd be cool and fun to re-explore that and share my thoughts with y'all here SO LETS GET BACK TO IT 😌🤙

▶▶▶

I'll mainly paste screenshots of what I already said on my twitter thread, but I might add some things there and there!

Damn I was kinda pissed off back then HGHFHGF but yeah, this is also the reason I won't ever make any straight or super straight flags I do not headcanon Delamain as Asexual, as there isn't any confirmation anywhere that he's interest in that kind of interaction or not, but I'll come back to him later!

Goro being canonly Queer is often missed, and this surprises me, considering he's one of the popular character! He is interested (or not) equally in both Fem and Masc V, giving he's replying to them the exact same ways! This isn't something done randomly by the devs :)

As said in the tweet, there isn't any direct and clear evidence of Mitch and Scorpion being a couple! Their relationship is heavily queer coded and queer people are more easily picking up on it than non-queer peoeple (and that's normal) Gay men have called their male partner Friend, Best friend and Brother through history maaaany many time, and that's part of my interpretation of their relationship too, especially giving they're both veterans who fought in the same war. The poem Mitch wrotes during "I'll Fly Away" (heavily implied) is romantic and gay coded, the gay novel in Mitch's tent (confirmed to be on purpose) is what we call environnemental story telling, it's subtle but adds to a character's backstory and lore! As for the datamining, I found a Mitch awkwardly explaining to V that no, Saul doesn't have any say in whatever he's doing with Scorpion stuff "because.... because... eh, that's just family stuff"

Note on Delamain here because I've heard it even caused some drama here on Tumblr that I said that? He uses He/Him to describe himself, the Main Entity, but multiples of his splites entities uses She/Her, meaning he's literally Non-Binary in how his entity is formed (I find it really cool for an AI ngl ngl) However if my headcanon offended anyone, I apologize! and I'd love to hear others interpretation :3

There isn't any open and visible MLM gay couple in Cyberpunk 2077! Bouncing off ElvenBeard's amazing analyses and thoughts on Kerry's sexuality, he can be seen as Bisexual (confirmed by RTAL themselves) and Homosexual (confirmed by the devs before and after the game released) he can be Both and Both are correct depending on how you view his character and how he grew from his past relationship (Bisexual with a masc preference, Bisexual who have to heal from his marriage, Gay man who realized his sexuality later after a wonky marriage, etc)

The whole "Responsability=Wife" Takemura take angers me to no end, taking its roots in heteronormativity- We see Goro care for his job above all else, to me that's what his "responsability" is and always was; his job

Nothing more to add here- Jackie's only relationship we see in game is with Misty, this doesn't confirm nor deny anything! (However with how he react to V pushing him, lip-bitting and all regardless of gender, I can totally see him as being queer)

AND That's about it!

It was interesting to dig into that thread last year and thought I'd share that here, as a refresher that Johnny is Bi, Takemura too, and smaller characters like Mitch and Evelynn still have clear hints of queerness to them ✨

I really like how CP77 touches on queerness, it feels realistic, it doesn't feel forced; which, sadly, create this problem of "UH?? This is pure LIES" if a character's sexuality is not splattered in your face, which then create the "Ugh why does it have to be forced down our throat" complains

Something something, lesson here is that people will always complain about queerness, be it loud, be it subtle, so fuck it! Scream it, go apeshit over small details, over-analyse everything cause chances are: this is intentional!

More Characters

I later noticed that Regina have a naked lady tattooed on her forearm, and since we know nothing is done randomly in CDPR's video games, makes me think that she might be sapphic in some way ✨

Mateo is also one of my fav "potential queer", how he could be a trans man, but there isn't anything really to support that other than that one interaction with V

▶ Link to the updated collage Reddit Thread

▶ Link to my Twitter breakdown

#Cyberpunk 2077 #CyberPride #CyberPride23 #Pride #Long Post #LETS TALK :3c I'm curious about what y'all think #I hope this won't be used in discourse as I know it has before cause sheesh hgfhghf #this is all from the game I'm not making things up 👀 #Adding more thoughts in the tags tho #I find it interesting (sad) that the majority of people will agree that Evelynn is queer coded #and potentially had something going on with Judy #but everyone seems to be against Mitch and Scorpion #while both duo called each others friends and have queer coded behavior / lore around them #something to think about yknow?

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

Trimax Thoughts Vol. 6 Pt. 1

Ahhhh I have fallen behind... D,:

Anyways. My usual stream of consciousness stuff for my first read! Here we go! I'm sure things can only get better from here.

[All images in this post are from Trigun Maximum Volume 6.]

Meryl... :( She's not even in the bed, she's just sitting in a chair, as if she knows she won't be able to sleep well... or more likely that she can't fall asleep and she's been awake so long she dozed off in the chair... my poor girl somebody at her job give her compensation or like. Extended vacation days or something. Please. (Also how long do you think Meryl had to reassure Milly that she was fine before Milly lay down and got some sleep? Idk seems like something she'd do; try to stay up with Meryl.)

The entire conversation between Wolfwood and Meryl is really interesting to me. Firstly, Wolfwood trying to dig for why Meryl hasn't asked any of the obvious questions (because it doesn't seem like Meryl has told anyone what she saw) and just coming across as incredibly annoying for no reason ahdjfhjdbfv. But what's intriguing is even with the lack of real communication here, I feel this is a conversation of equals, despite Wolfwood's objective being to get Meryl to leave. Meryl's fear has little to do with Vash's transformation itself, but rather the implications of what he is and the very visceral and traumatic experiences that she is now privy to through the perspective of the person who suffered them. Thing is, even with Wolfwood lacking this info, he still notes something about Meryl's character without saying it outright that is 100% spot on - Meryl won't leave for herself. But she might leave for Milly. She has a strong sense of responsibility to her, and Wolfwood pulls on that, likely because it's something of a commonality they share. (However, I think Wolfwood does not fully see that Vash is included, as well as Milly, in Meryl's list of people she would do pretty much anything for... but that might involve Wolfwood having to like. Actually admit that Vash occupies a similar position for him in a personal and not just occupational way...)

[ID: Vash's hand holds Marlon's gun loosely. His index finger has released its hold on the trigger and is dripping blood. End ID.]

...oh yeah. He's doing well.

Vash: *on the tail end of a severely traumatic flashback and incident*

Also Vash:

[ID: Three images of Vash making a variety of silly faces. End ID.]

(Also I adore his snark so much. Vash's inner monologue has got to be so much snarkier than anything he says out loud. That whole "I won't say anything because I am polite but know that I am thinking very loudly about how much of a dick you are".)

[ID: A panel of Brandon Marlon in a cartoony style, mockingly throwing his hands in the air and saying "Ohhh, look at me! I fired a gun! Woow!" then switching to scowling and waving dismissively, saying "You can die and be reborn a thousand times and I still won't make a gun for a moron like you!" End ID.]

Oh my god. Someone who actually understands the responsibility that comes with distributing weapons. Brandon Marlon you are my new favourite minor character. Also you're so funny about it.

Meryl... she is so worried about him... :(

"His determination is stronger than the regret he carries." Augh...

Wolfwood having nightmares... Meryl having nightmares... it would surprise me if Vash and Milly weren't also having nightmares... there is only one solution. Group cuddle session under nice big blanket.

[ID: Vash sits, perched on the edge of a roof with a friendly smile. Behind him, the full moon with the crater is in full view against the darkness of the night sky. End ID.]

Oh. Hm. This is a choice. Very much echoes what Wolfwood was saying to Meryl earlier, that they both know "what kind of guy he is" (friendly, compassionate, etc.), but that he's also very dangerous... a "time-bomb"... :(

AUGH

Oh man. More of the "I know" "I know you know" FUCK. No way Vash didn't realize Wolfwood was pointing his gun at him.

God. Nothing Wolfwood does matters. It looks like he killed someone to save the kids, but they're not safe and it just guaranteed he couldn't go back to see them. He tried to kill Knives but was too freaked to follow through and ended up trapped obeying him. Knives is going to destroy the orphanage anyways no matter what he does, so all he's doing is stalling for time. Caring about Vash doesn't change anything - he's still doing exactly what he's been told to do. He's stuck. He's trapped. Somebody help him out please.

Vash has now canonically been referred to as "pretty boy". I mean we all knew but it's still funny.

[ID: Vash, aiming his gun, has his back turned to Wolfwood, who is crouched low and shielding him with the Punisher. The remnants of a wooden table are shattered across the scene. End ID.]

OHHHH this fight scene is GOOD. Back to back fighting! They automatically switched who they were facing off against AHHH

They both, without even a word, showed their backs and trusted the other to defend them. I. Ok. Ok. I'm cool.

Never mind apparently Milly is sleeping like a log shgjdfhbvjdfhb

The Legato and Elendira interaction is so funny. Knives' duo of worsties who hate each other and want to kill each other but settle for petty insults and whipping beverages in the other's face.

DOUBLE FANG??? OHHH???

Why is this boy Bane. He has Bane powers. What.

...Legato. Wtf happened to your tongue. Like I'd heard people talk about the tongue but I thought it's probably not that bad. Never mind. Eugh.

[ID: A set of panels showing street market vendors and their owners, selling their goods. Snippets of dialogue are heard: "Right here! Fresh meat! Just in today! Chicken! Beef! Pork! You want it, we've got it!" "It's always a concern. That's why I suggest this powder..." "We use ingredients as close to the original as possible." "Well? Doesn't that smell good? That's the very freshest tea." "It's really fantastic, madam." "My, that is good. You don't skimp on the sugar." "It's flammable, so be careful. Nah, just handle it the same way you would gasoline." Amid the conversation, a close-up of Knives' face reveals his eye, narrowed, bitter and distant. End ID.]

Ok. This set of panels gets me. There's so much ambiguity here. Knives is listening to the people enjoy the fruits of the labours of his sisters that humanity have been exploiting. The thing is... these things, a lot of them aren't exactly necessities. They're specifically engineering things to be close to what they had, which, while understandable (humans need enjoyment to survive. like that's real), it also begs the question of whether this kind of differentiation increases demand on the Plants beyond what is necessary for humans to take. Or maybe it doesn't. Maybe the differentiation is no more effort on the part of the Plants than the raw amount needed to live comfortably. It's hard to say, since we're seeing this through the filter of Knives' view, for whom any amount the humans take from Plants is too much. Anyways. It's interesting. ...I also think he looks painfully young in this panel, but maybe that's just me.

[ID: Knives stands before a headstone engraved with his name. He is just an eerily grinning silhouette, with his weapons curled and hooked over his head like a set of bladed wings. End ID.]

He is proud of his artwork. (Sorry lol)

"This Plant is going to be retired." <- uh. yikes. Way to avoid saying she's going to die.

"Deliberately go out of control" so wait. I'm confused. The Plant is going to go out of control at the end of her life cycle and they're harvesting what was going to happen anyways, or they deliberately push her to that point so that she goes out of control? What's happening here.

Hm. An angel arm type thing formed from what looks like her stomach... or maybe womb? I don't know but that's... hm. It's like it's their core or something. Like a reactor core. If that's the case then it being forced out of Vash like that is even more disturbing.

Her hair turned black. No. No hold on. Oh no.

[ID: A close up of Knives' face. His eyes have gone blank and lines from his Plant abilities are etched on his cheeks. End ID.]

Ohhh... remember how the blank eyes seem to show severe distress...? :(

Noooo oh my god. It's so much worse. Knives has been inadvertently killing Vash every time he activates his powers. AUGH

Local man just wanted to enjoy his noodles. Unfortunately his buddy is a trouble magnet and he keeps getting interrupted. Will he ever have the chance to finish his noodles in peace? hdjvbhdfvhjb

So Vash has been sneaking off to day drink apparently. Holy crap that panel is disturbing. Also it hurts me. My poor boy... :(

"Needle-noggin-isms" I'm screaming

Oh god he's so off in this fight. He's... he's actually drunk, isn't he...?

!!! Holy shit Vash's Plant abilities saved him automatically.

Oh fuck off with these people.

AUGH MERYLLLLL

I am in so much pain. Haha. Ha.

Ok ok but - does anyone other than Meryl know that she saw everything? Because Vash was totally out of it in that scene - it's not like he meant to transmit those flashbacks. I don't think anyone knows the full extent of what Meryl saw. So, when she has a panic attack and flinches away from him... he completely misunderstands. He thinks it's because she sees him as a monster; that she's scared of him. But that's not true! Meryl has done nothing but be concerned for him! And yes, it was terrifying, and yes, she's scared, but she cares about him! As a person! But I think Vash perceived this as a rejection. And all he can do is apologize. (Augh and the parallel to Hoppered and the woman with the blinded eyes who panicked when being touched...) STOP THIS NOW THIS HURTS

The little kid defending Vash... not old enough yet for fear to overtake reason... :')

I feel like Elendira is just here to see how things go down. She's here for a good time, not a long time.

TESLA MENTION.

Rem is so silly. <3

Baby Knives wants so badly to be liked and accepted... augh.

The contrast between "Do you think we can become friends with them?" and "Yeah... it might take a lot of effort though." Ooh. Many thoughts.

#meryl my poor girl... :( #i am psyched to see more of tiny knives and vash. and rem!!! #trigun #trimax #trigunbookclub #storyrambles

[dreamingdarklyblog]

So what to write?

So I'm trying to think of what to write for my writing partner. He got called away before he could get off, and that's just no fun. Though I did get him to fuck my big soft tits and cum allll over them... Mmm...

If you're confused by how those two thoughts make sense it's because the tit fucking happened all in my head =/. I mean, that should probably be obvious since I don't have big soft tits, lol

It's also kind of a let down, cause... Well I guess it depends on how it's implemented somehow, but the way he does these things I don't have a lot of control over what happens. I mean I can more and do whatever, but because everything else is happening in my head, it can be hard to interact with it in like, unscripted ways?

Basically I really wanted to blow him and have him cum down my throat but I couldn't even get a taste, tried licking it off my tits but I guess my brain just couldn't make it happen. *sighs*

I'm not sure what the difference is, as I'm not generally awake for that part, but I've done uh... similar things before, and it worked okay. So there's something different I'm not seeing. *shrugs*

Aaaanyway. I'm trying to think what I should write about, and I figured actually I sorta did write about one thing earlier today when I was trying to make him cum.

So he asked me to like, make up stories about images and gifs for him to jerk off to? Which is pretty hot ;). I mean, I'd rather blow him, of course, but if the things in my head are getting him off, that's great too.

So anyway... I'm doing that, making up stories, and then I hit one and I started making one up and I realized, wait a second, I don't have to. Cause I've basically done this one before. So the gif is this lady sucking a guys cock by some trees, and I start telling him a story about how she's out for a walk with her boyfriend, and he whispers in her ear and she just HAD to suck his cock...

So yeah that totally happened to me when I was younger. The same guy as the classroom story I told you earlier. Really all these stories of me going along with really stupid shit were all that guy. We were young and stupid. I was reeeally far gone into how hot the hypnosis kink was, and making some REALLY poor choices, lol. And was letting him get away with stuff I really shouldn't have. Way worse than this. But yeah.

One of those things was a blowjob trigger. I know right? So creative... Did I mention we were young and stupid? I don't know if I always would have had a thing for giving blowjobs, or if it just started because of him abusing the fuck out of it, but yeah, I've had a thing for sucking cock ever since. But like I said, he was my first for a lot of things (including that) so maybe it's like, hypnotic conditioning, or maybe it's just the totally standard "formative sexual experiences establish very strong neural connections" thing. But like 95% of the physical stuff we did was what you'd call 3rd base. Oral, manual, etc.

So it was a pretty established trigger. I knew it existed, but not what it was, still don't really. We were out on a hike to a place not that far from here, a fairly popular hiking spot. There's lots of those around here. There were other people on the trail, we'd passed a few as they came back down, and could occasionally hear other groups in the distance behind us. The hike wasn't that long, about a half hour or so. And when we got to the top of the trail, at the nice scenic overlook, he sorta pulled me in and kissed me. A kiss with intent, I'd call it. I kissed him back, but pushed him back a bit. I didn't really want to make out in a public place. I was pretty embarrassed by the thought of getting caught (and we'd already been caught in the parking garage at school like the week before).

He smirked. And I had about two seconds to be concerned before he said something, and I wanted his cock.

That's how sudden it was. Always was. I just wanted it. Really badly. I kind of clenched my hands and closed my eyes I think, biting my lip, reminding myself we were in public and I couldn't suck him off. But I heard him say something again and my knees got weak. All I could see were scenes of me sucking his cock. His glorious cock. Rock hard and filling my mouth with cum. I wanted it so, So badly. I opened my eyes so I'd stop seeing those images, those thoughts, and I saw him. All I could see was his crotch. The jeans he was wearing. The zipper. His belt. It was like the rest of him vanished. The forest vanished. The world shrunk.

I was breathing hard. Trying to control the urge, trying to say something about it being a bad idea, but I don't know what words actually came out. And then he said something again and I couldn't think anymore. My knees gave out. My mouth was open and moaning. My hands were fumbling with his belt, waddling towards him on my knees as he back-peddled away from me to the side of the clearing. He was saying something like "Stop, Wait" but I didn't care. I needed it. I needed his cock in my mouth. I needed his cum down my throat. It was all I could think about. I could taste it. I was desperate. Like I was drowning and it was a giant inflatable cock for me to float on while I sucked it dry. Yes, terrible metaphor, what are you gonna do?

He kept trying to pull away but I wouldn't let him. I couldn't. He had the cock and I needed it. He couldn't leave! I yanked his pants down and grabbed his ass so he couldn't back away, but he tripped over his pants and fell on the ground. Bare assed on moss and dirt. I just followed. I was on my hands and knees over him, his legs under me, his cock in my mouth, and that was the only thought I had room for. His cock was in my mouth! I had it! I was sucking his cock! His amazing, perfect cock that I needed more than anything!

I sucked and slurped but, he was barely hard. He was talking but I couldn't really hear him. I assume telling me to wait, or get off, or something like that. But I really didn't care. I had his cock and that was all that mattered. I stroked him with my hand, sucked on the head, frantically trying to make him harder, moaning around it in my mouth. I'm not sure what worked exactly, but clearly something did, because he quickly got hard. Rock hard. I bobbed up and down, stroking him faster and faster. I wanted his cum. So badly. I needed it.

He pushed himself up into a sitting position so he could push my hair back (it was longer then) and put his hand to the side of my face. He was still talking, I ignored him and just sped up. He was so close. I could taste it. Literally. I could taste his pre-cum and it tasted So fucking good. I was moaning louder. I could feel myself getting more and more worked up too. Which was a thing that seemed to happen when I sucked his cock. I wonder why? (sarcasm)

I heard voices coming from down the trail. He tapped me on the head, once, then again, then repeatedly. Probably trying to get me to stop, but I didn't care. I couldn't care. He was going to cum. I could taste it. That was all that mattered. I just sucked harder, my neck was straining. I knew somehow if I didn't hurry than he wouldn't cum. That I wouldn't get to taste it. And I couldn't let that happen. I needed it! So I did the only thing I could think of and sped up more. My tongue was circling the head of his cock while my hand pumped up and down frantically. I was moaning, gasping for air around his shaft, when he finally came.

I could finally taste him. Exploding. I could hear him gasping. Feel him twitch and pulse. Every glorious spasm. It filled my mouth. I gulped, swallowing as fast as I could, and I felt that heat spreading through my body. That taste. I could feel the heat burning through me. Feel my body pulsing in time. Feel it building and building as I moaned and gulped and shuddered and Came.

So hard.

I lay gasping and moaning and twitching on the ground. In that little clearing. As he pulled away and pulled up his pants. Zipping and buckling. I caught my breath and pulled myself together. Straightened my clothes and took a big gulp of water. Then blushed furiously as we quickly left, passing another group on their way up, who gave me so strange looks.

Was it because I was blushing? Was it because they had heard what happened? I have no idea.

Anyway. Most of the walk back down was me telling him what a colossal moron he was, and to never do that where we could get caught again... >_<

Sadly he... Wasn't a great listener. *sigh*

#young and foolish

[chaisshitposts]

Hey chai , I wanted some advice, I have been going through psych-k(which I got to know from your blogs) and I have been trying to go into the void it's been 3 days. And I wanted to tell you something (coz I like you so much). I have been manifesting my sp and I got to know about this manifesting stuff clearly when I wanted to get her. My situation was also the same( sp is not behaving the way I wanted and I have deleted the apps where I talk to her or check her status( so I can't be triggered by 3d). It's working well but now it's something like why am I manifesting her .coz, she didn't treat me well and yk all that hurtful stuff lover has to suffer. But, now that didn't affect me much. Earlier I used to cry 😭, why did she do this. Nevertheless, I have no contact with her and I don't know if I will manifest her in 3d, I will be loving to her or not. Because I am not kind of feeling it now. And honestly, before a relationship, I want her to regret and apologize for what she did. Then, I'll think about it. But I have been affirming inconsistently for her. And I am focused on the void, because that is instant. I think I am just boring you. But, Is this common to feel like that? Bcoz, literally I was crazy for her, but I am not attached anymore and I don't want any girl now. I am just neutral, but I think about what she did repeating the old story(the effects have been decreased). Bcoz , officially we are not in a relationship and also we are not separate ( there is something between us now). She is a nice girl like me but still not what I want.

Sorry for bothering, but if you can just guide me, coz you help sweetly and you are so so so nice.

☕

hiya anon! thanks for sharin' a bit about yer journey. as for what you're askin', it sounds like to me that you've become a lot more confident in yerself and have started to realize yer self-worth. I see this as an absolute win, cause you're legit the creator of yer own reality and ya can do whatever ya want, feel however ya want, etc. it seeems that this neutral feelin' that's suddenly takin' place definitely comes from ya healin' after realizin' how much shit yer sp's put ya through.

I've read lots of stories about folks who realized that this special person they'd been head over heels for over time turns out to not be so special once they start focusin' on themselves. ya should definitely consider this as self-growth, be proud of what you've accomplished. I think the only thing ya can do now is to trust yer guts. the amazin' thing is that everything isn't permanent unless ya want it to be permanent (but ya can still change that ofc) sO ya could always have this sp again for whenever ya want, or ya don't even need an sp at all, or ya could build yerself an sp from scratch. this is yer world, this is yer creation, ya can literally make someone just for you. good luck on yer void journey, it will all work out even better than you've ever imagined.

#— chai's asks. !! ~ #— anonnie. !! ~

[slanax]

so the podcast playlist ran out at work earlier today and left me with just music and my thoughts while I continued packaging products on autopilot. Now over the last month or so I've done a lot in my day to day life to stop stagnating and settling for 'good enough' as far as like household and stuff is concerned, I finally upgraded my phone and phone plan after like five and ten years respectively, I bought new clothes that actually fit me instead of the holdovers from back in the day that I was still wearing, my kitchen now has an actual workspace bc I've rearranged my furniture and added some more - shoutouts to my mom who wanted the doors off of my ikea cupboards so she'd have a matching set for the ones I left at home (the kind I had wasn't in store anymore) bc her offering to drive me to Ikea to get replacements triggered a bit of a binge in rearranging my whole apartment and let me transport the new stuff home too. Visiting my brother made me cook more and eat healthier bc he showed me the burgers he's cooking up when he needs something fast but like, with standards.

anyways. rambling. point is that the whole thing got me thinking about other things in my life that I'm kinda 'eh good enough' on, and the big one there is my identity and my body. Me being cis is, at least at this point, a conscious choice born from indifference, the factory settings work well enough and it'd be effort to even start looking into what I'd have to do to change them. But at the same time, it doesn't feel super cis for my position to be "yeah I'd prolly trans my gender if given the chance but that sounds like I'd have to file shit and call people and bureaucracy would be involved. But I would. But the effort." like I'm remembering Ranma 1/2 from my childhood and think that'd be neat to be able to do, just switch genders at the drop of a literal bucket, I feel that's not a very cis thought.

so then about two weeks ago my workplace gave us access to some health benefits, because they're feeling bad about keeping the warehouse people a bit out of the loop and removed from the office people, and also they're having trouble finding new people and really don't want any of us to quit, or something along those lines. Point is I have better health insurance now, based on a calender year budget, so I basically have an above average budget for the second half of this year now and I wanna make use of that, because it's a use-it-or-lose-it kinda deal. Now I don't know if I can use that for any gender affirming stuff, but I might.

The problem that remains is that I still couldn't care less for going through the whole rigamaroll of a social transition, but like. staying on-paper cis and continuing to use my given name to avoid all those complications, legally still being the same person and just looking different (might need a new ID if I go that far lol) doing whatever the fuck I want with my body in the meantime without it ever affecting my legal identity because it's not a deadname if I'm still just using it, it doesn't actually give me dysphoria, and they can't force me to change my name just because I have boobs, might be what I want? And then maybe I can consider a legal gender and/or name change from there?

idk on one hand it sounds like something I'd want to do but on the other hand I also feel it's not like, committed enough? like both on a practical level where I need a doctor to help me transition physically while still using the same (male) name, and on an ideological level where it feels like appropriation in a way to just want the body and the appearance but skipping over the whole paperwork thing because I can't be arsed while for a lot of people changing name and officially recognized identity is a just as if not more important aspect of transitioning.

genuinely can't tell on my own if that standpoint is a valid one, if I'm right to be hesitant for that reason or if that's an exclusionist brainworm take, would appreciate feedback and second opinions on that part especially

either way I am going to look into using my newfound health benefits for getting my facial hair lasered first and foremost because even if I stay physically 100% male that shit is annoying, I don't care for how it looks on me, I feel messy when it's there and can't be assed to shave it regularily. Avoiding effort is a key part of my identity either way whether I'm Cis+ or Legally Cis For Tax Reasons

[shiny-jr]

Legit had to take a long sigh before I decided how to reply to this ask I got that follows the topic of the last asks. I decided to copy paste here because it’s a long one, and I wanted to put the warnings first. So, WARNING, talk of non-con, dub-con, etc. Minors, please stay away from this particular conversation. We’ll be back to our regular stuff shortly, hopefully. 

anon in the inbox: i don't think non-con or dub-con is an issue, like pretty sure that's a part of BDSM roleplay (correct me if im wrong but that's what ive seen explained before) so it's not that concerning to me; people just have some kinks. i personally don't like it either (because i find it very uncomfortable and just not to my taste) but to flat out say that writers who do write this kind of stuff need therapy or are concerning is just kind of rude? i don't mean to offend but people are allowed to enjoy certain things, it's all based on preference after all. but like that one other anon said and you commented on tagging work, that is pretty annoying. there should always be a warning about that type of stuff cause it can be triggering. there is (to me at least) a very clear line between fantasy and reality and I'm sure a lot of writers can distinguish the fact that yandere content is just not okay for irl even if they write stuff that may "romanticise" it (you shouldn't be reading that type of content anyway if you're not feeling okay so it's kinda on the reader too if the work is properly tagged) like i enjoy reading soft yandere stuff with a darling who accepts the red flags but i know that in real life this would be very disturbing and just flat out manipulation and i'd never want to find myself in this position. i think you might have over exaggerated this aspect a bit but i do respect your opinion and you are entitled to it but im just leaving my thoughts for others. 

Me, personally, I think non-con and dub-con is an issue. Because that stuff derives from no consent or not clear consent and it’s not just in bdsm role-play, it’s also in fanfics. And I do think it’s concerning that people do genuinely enjoy reading/writing those topics. Can I stop them? No. Is what I say gonna stop them? Most likely no. All I can do is keep that stuff off my page and avoid it. 

As for the whole fantasy and reality stuff with the yandere thing, I know it’s fantasy, I know most people know it’s fantasy too, but there are still very young impressionable children that get their hands on electronics and end up on sites they should not be on at their age. I mentioned something similar before. I know minors follow me, I know they read my stuff, I know they’re on this site, minors that should be focusing on other stuff instead of reading questionable things on the internet. This is the reason why I’m so adamantly against the romanticization of yanderes and why I refuse to write it. Because there are readers young enough that can’t quite yet distinguish the line between fantasy and reality. They see this stuff about yanderes and may come to think, “oh, I want a yandere! this violent and (sometimes maybe) abusive stuff is okay! Their manipulation and unhealthy obsession is okay too if they say they love me!” 

Finally, you said you enjoy reading about soft yanderes with an mc that accepts the red flags. If that’s the case, I’m not sure why you’re here if you read my stuff. Yes, I write “soft” yanderes, but I don’t write anything accepting a Yandere’s red flags. As spoken about here. If you disagree with the things I said, oh well, I said earlier that I wasn’t likely to change your mind. Just don’t ever ask me to write anything like non-con or romanticizing yanderes. This is the last post I’m gonna talk about this topic, because really, I just wanted to spend my evening writing and relaxing. Yet here we are. I probably missed some stuff, but this talk made me tired. If another message about this comes up in the inbox, it’s getting deleted. 

#shiny rants #probably important