#bees are friends wasps scare the living shit out of me
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Me 🤝 You
Traumatic experience with bees/wasps yet still produce for Crazy:B
to be(e) honest, they're nowhere near as intimidating. also they can't fly.
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Your ex is trying to embarrass you in public, but your lover steps in as a shield, eyes ablaze in a fury. - with Keyleth, Grog, and Vax'ildan?
thanks dear!!! requests are open!!
REBLOGS > LIKES
Keyleth
• Keyleth got momentarily distracted by a vendor with! Little wooden carvings!! Of animals!!
• “Oh! Buttercup, come look at these! Oh, they’ve got a little sabertooth!”
• Yes, she absolutely calls you buttercup, or lilac, or sunshine, or rosebud, etc. They’re all based on nature things! Of course they are, it’s Kiki!
• Pretty quickly, she realizes that you aren’t there with her. Well… That’s weird. Where’d you go??
• She starts to try and find you, and it’s not too tough to find you interacting with a stranger.
• What they’re doing doesn’t matter, but it’s brought the attention of a ton of strangers, and you look uncomfortable.
• She immediately shoves her way through the crowd and will absolutely summon something to try and freak them out.
• You know in the first fight against the Briarwoods when Keyleth summons a ton of bees and yeets them at Delilah?
• She absolutely does that.
• There’s more of a lead up to it. She summons them and, since they are her bees, lets them climb on her arms.
• “Do you know the interesting thing about bees? When they sting, it’s a death sentence. But here’s a funny thing; these are wasps. Wasps don’t die after they sting… But you’re gonna die after, uh, after… Oh, I’m not good at quippy remarks.”
• She just yeets the wasps at them, absolutely grinning ear to ear.
• Then she’ll wrap an arm around you and say “they deserve that.”
Grog
• “Fuck yeah, they got ale!!! Babe, babe do you want some ale!?”
• He turns around and just… where? Are you?
• “Babe? Hey, babe, where you at?”
• He wanders around the festival for a little while, trying to find you. After asking a few vendors, he’s got an idea where you are.
• And there is some bitch ass piece of shit talking to you.
• Grog doesn’t know much, but he knows he fucking hates whoever that is. You look upset and are trying to get away – that’s not good. Not good at all.
• He takes out VM’s bag of holding, the one with his ax and other various random shit.
• Including the severed hand of that guy that he and Vax cut off.
• He walks up behind you and puts his hand on your shoulder.
• “’Ey babe. This guy botherin’ you?”
• He pulls out the severed, partially rotted hand, and throws it at your ex.
• “That’s what happened to the last guy who bothered one o’ my friends. I’d say you should get outta here-“
• He pulls out his axe
• “-before somethin’ worse happens to you, yeah?”
• They’re running scared before anything else is said or happens.
• He grins, kisses your forehead, and asks “do you want some ale? I know I do.”
Vax’ildan
• “You funny little raven, you! My finger’s not a worm! Oh, you are the cutest, aren’t you?”
• He absolutely gets distracted by all of the animals he sees. Ravens are a favorite, and the aforementioned one, he absolutely will adopt. Usually he’d steal but, you know, they’re making a living from this, so…
• “We’re gonna have to name you, yes we are. Oh, you are the sweetest! My little darling, my little knight-“
• His newly adopted raven croaks, flutters his wings and tries to get Vax to pay attention to the crowd gathering.
• After a moment Vax does notice, and absolutely shoves his way through the crowd.
• He finds Vex and “hey, hey, what’s going on?”
• She explains that she should have brought her fucking bow because she wants to murder this jackass bothering you.
• “You’ve your daggers, brother? If you slit their throat I’ll keep the guards from catching you. We’ve done it before.”
• He sighs, “don’t bring that up. I… Let me deal with it.”
• He gets a natural 20 on stealth and sneaks up behind this cunt, one of the daggers to their throat, and greets you with “hey peach, did you miss me?”
• He won’t say much else, but come around to give you a peck on the lips and “meet my raven, too. I’ve yet to name him but, ah, you know. Bigger fish to fry.”
• He lights up his dagger and turns around, “such as you. You know, I’ve never filleted a human. Fish, squirrels, really any animal. But not a human. That would be so fun, wouldn’t it?”
• Your ex is running for the hills.
• “There we go! Don’t let the door hit you on the way out! Or, or… something… Darling, are you alright?”
• He’ll check on you and make sure you’re alright before- “and we need a name for my little friend here! Yes, yes we do!”
#critical role#critical role x reader#the legend of vox machina#the legend of vox machina x reader#critical role x you#critical role x y/n#the legend of vox machina x you#vax'ildan#grog strongjaw#Keyleth#keyleth of the air ashari#vax'ildan x reader#grog x reader#keyleth x reader
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Splatoon oc, striving idol's incorrect quotes cuz I'm bored!
Whella: So what are your political beliefs?
Jallie, awkwardly trying to impress them: Well, I think Pikachu would be a lot more powerful if he had a gun.
Whella: I got an idea!
Jallie: Does it involve breaking the law?
Whella: By now don’t you think that’s a given?
Jallie: I was just trying to be optimistic.
Whella: Don’t bother.
Jallie: Are you trying to seduce me?
Whella: Why, are you seducible?
Whella: I am 39 cheetos tall.
Jallie: Why... are you measuring your height in cheetos?
Whella: Because we're out of doritos.
Jallie: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case?
Whella: wHat?
Jallie: I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved.
Whella: Can we go back to the part when you said "when I get murdered"?
Whella: *eating a cinnamon roll*
Jallie: Cannibalism.
Whella: *confused chewing noises*
Whella: Your future self is talking shit about you right now.
Jallie: Jokes on them. I'll ruin their fucking life.
Whella: Hey, what’s the name of the guy who lives down the hall?
Jallie: His cats' names are Walter and Rose.
Whella: That's not what I asked.
Jallie: That is all the information I have.
Whella: I wish I could control wasps and bees to sting my enemies.
Jallie: You’re too young to have enemies.
Whella: You don’t even know.
Whella: Remember that time you dared me to lick a swingset?
Jallie: No, I said "Whella, don't lick that swingset" and you said "Don't tell me what to do" and licked the swingset.
Jallie: What is this!?
Whella: That’s the weight of guilt. Give in to the nice side. Help those unfortunate, and make the guilt go away, my friend.
Jallie: Ow! Make it stop!
Whella: Surrender to your kindness, Jallie. It’s nice to be nice.
Jallie: Your guilt is strong, my friend. But it is no match for the power of my selfishness!
Whella: Wait you like me? For my personality?
Jallie: I know, I was surprised too.
Jallie: Whella, can you help me? All of my clothes keep disappearing for some reason.
Whella, wearing a hoodie that's 5 times bigger than their size: Spooky.
Whella: *standing on a balcony and sneezes*
Jallie: *standing on the roof* Bless you.
Whella: God?!
Whella, peeling a banana: May I take your jacket, sir? Hahahaha.
Jallie: Do you think other people can’t hear you?
Jallie: So I’m the only one around here who can clean up, huh? You can't even lift a finger?
Whella: Do I get to pick the finger?
Jallie: Watcha doin?
Whella: Stealing my neighbour’s cat.
Jallie: Scandalous.
Jallie: Can I help?
Whella: Ayo, what the FUCK is this?!?
Jallie, sitting down, surrounded by corpses: I won Mafia, that’s what.
Whella: I WOULD DESTROY THE WORLD FOR YOU!
Jallie: Okay, can you do the dishes?
Whella: No!
Whella: Standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like ‘look at this fucking flower. This flower is taller than I am. This flower is winning and I’m losing.’
Jallie: Wow, you are not ready to hear about trees.
Jallie: You use humor to deflect your trauma.
Whella: Awww, thanks-
Jallie: That’s not a good thing.
Whella: All I’m hearing is that you think I’m funny.
Jallie: Stop setting things on fire because you're curious about what will happen. What will happen is fire.
Whella: But what if something else happens just this one time.
Whella: You remind me of the ocean.
Jallie: Because I'm deep and mysterious?
Whella: No, because you're full of salt and you scare people.
Jallie: What's wrong with you?
Whella: Off the top of my head, I'd say low self-esteem, a lack of paternal affection, and a genetic predisposition for anxiety and depression.
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The Evil little Cheater
Roman and Remus were having a sword fight. But, Remus keeps cheating by using animals to annoy him! In a revengeful attack, Roman uses a special kind of weakness to his advantage, using a tiny chipmunk with a familiar name...
"Oh, I LOVE, being given 2 D[rama]'s at once!"
XD So sorry! (Not sorry! ;P)
This fic was based off a roleplay I did with a few friends.
Roman and Remus were currently having a sword fight around the house. How the sword fight started? They're sword-wielding brothers...Does the origin really matter?
Virgil and Deceit were currently watching the sword fight take place on the couch. The sword fight was going well...But, it could've been better! Because to no one's surprise: Remus may or may not have been cheating...Just a little bit...
Roman, along with the audience in the room, could very much tell it was Remus doing the cheating. They were able to expect it at this point, and could only sometimes put a stop to it...He was just too evil of a Duke to throw away an opportunity to cheat!
Deceit was just watching, eating a bag of popcorn. "They're going to tear each other into pieces...This is gonna be fun!" Deceit declared. Virgil was also watching, making sure no one got deathly hurt during the fight.
"REMUS, I SWEAR TO GOD- STOP CHEATING!" Roman shouted at him.
"I don't know what your talking about." Remus denies. But, his attempts at lying are very obvious.
Virgil, who's watching this whole thing, is full-on biting his nails from anxiety. Roman pushed Remus’s sword blade away with his handle and backed up a bit.
Remus, feeling especially evil, summons a bee to fly around Roman's head, just to annoy him more. Roman's eyes narrowed as he watched the bee fly around him. Thank god it wasn't a wasp..."Oh, you fuckin’ asshole..." Roman mutters towards his brother. Remus snickers as Roman figures out how to handle the buzzing bee.
But much to Remus's surprise, Roman places the bee onto his shoulder and continues fighting. "You forget how good I am with animals." Roman says with a smug grin.
Oh shit...He DID forget about that! "Damn...too bad you aren't good with these guys:" He comments. Remus summons a swarm of rats, whom he has trained to be just as annoying as he is. They were all his little rat sons who he loved and cared for in his own way.
The swarm of rats began to run around his feet. Roman's eyes widened as around 20-30 plague-looking rats surrounded him. "EEP! HEY- OW! DO THESE THINGS BITE?!" Roman shouted, hoping and praying they didn't. Because WHO, IN THEIR RIGHT MIND, WOULD WANT THE PLAGUE IN 2020?!
"Only if they don’t like you." Remus winked.
Roman growled as he backed up, secretly scared of their unpredictable nature. Roman hugged his sword up to his chest as he looked down at the swarm of rats. “Okay...And knowing you, they automatically hate me...” Roman commented.
"Maybe just a little bit...but don’t worry! They don’t bite very hard..." he grins. The reality was: they don’t actually bite. The rats are just meant to freak Roman out, for the most part.
Virgil shakes his head, utterly disappointed by the cheating that was occurring right now. Deceit is just looking at the rats, both slightly nervous, but mostly intrigued by the use in such a circumstance.
Roman had started jumping around the rats, doing all he can to not step on them. After getting somewhat free from the swarm, Roman swung at Remus.
Virgil flinches, hoping and praying that no one got a blade in the face.
Remus ducked. "Ahaha! Bitch, ya missed!" Remus declares, placing his sword right on Roman's chest where the heart is. But, Roman had crossed his sword against it at the last second. Now, both swords were making a plus sign as they pushed against each other.
Deceit, who was interested beforehand, eventually began to get bored.
But right at the climax of the moment (Could be taken as a double meaning, I don't care...), Patton walks into the living room. His virgin eyeballs widen, as dad mode immediately takes over. "What is going on in here, kiddos?!" Patton yelled, concerned by the violent game.
Remus grins. "I have successfully killed my opponent. No offense your highness but you really need to step up your game." Remus explained.
But, Roman had a plan up his sleeve...literally. Roman used his magic and made a small chipmunk. The chipmunk crawled down Roman’s arm, and up Remus's arm under the sleeve. "Weaken the cheater, Alvin!" Roman cheered. Apparently, Roman had named his pet after the main chipmunk in Alvin and the Chipmunks.
Virgil giggles a little at the name reference. Patton put his hands on his hips and turned to the other two sides in the room. "What are they fighting about this time?" he asked.
Before anyone can reply, Roman shouts, "IT'S A SWORD FIGHT, AND REMUS IS CHEATING!" rather loudly with a smile on his face. Patton looks back at the two creative personas and sighs. Of course...why would it be anything else?
Roman mentally tells the chipmunk to go crawling all over Remus’s middle and belly. The chipmunk understood his instructions and crawled himself up to the belly. Remus tries to shake his arm so the chipmunk would get out without hurting it. "I WAS NOT CHEATING I WAS JUST SLIGHTLY CHANGING THE RUHULES- WHAHAT THE HEHELL?!" he yells, falling into some giggles as he tries harder to get the chipmunk out of his costume.
"Keep going! Don’t stop crawling! You're a quick little guy! You can do it!" Roman cheered.
Patton raised an eyebrow "Heheh! Now you're just sounding like Logan there, Remus! because you just defined cheating." Patton mentioned.
Virgil smiles at the scene in front of him.
"Now...GO FOR THE KNEES!" Roman shouts excitedly, before pushing Remus’s sword away with his own.
"Gehet ihihit ouhut! WAHAIT NOHO DOHON'T YOUHU DAHAHARE!" Remus yelled as he stumbled back, trying to get it out. When the chipmunk got to his knees, Remus's eyes widen as he tries even harder to get it out.
"Good job, buddy!" Roman praises.
Deceit just stares in awe, unable to process the sword fight - turned tickle fight.
"Aww... hmmmm." Virgil thought aloud. He began to summon his spider and puts it carefully into Roman's outfit to crawl down his back.
Roman just squealed and giggled as he felt the fur-covered tarantula crawl all over his back. "AAahahahaha! Whahahat thehe-" Roman giggles.
Being the dad he is, Patton smiles as he watches the adorable scene.
"GEHEHET OHUHUT, YOU FUHUHURRY LIHITTLE SHIHIHIT!" Remus falls, unable to keep his balance before bending his knees off the ground so he didn't crush the damn chipmunk.
"Greheheat job! Yohou can cohohome ohout now." Roman tells the chipmunk through his giggles. The chipmunk follows his owner's instructions, and comes crawling out of Remus��s leg, and attempts to crawl to Roman. Roman gasps and holds his hand out. "Stop! The rats are still swarming me..." Roman warned. "I'm just gonna-" Roman said, before making the chipmunk disappear with his hand.
Suddenly, Roman begins to feel something else that's soft, crawling down his back. Roman jumps and giggles as he reaches down his back. "EEEP! Nohohow whahahat ihihis THAHAHAT?!" Roman asks, giggling more at the thought of two- TWO pets crawling down his back. The spider crawled itself over to his side, before heading over to his stomach.
"Youhuhure ahan ahahasshole!" Remus said before summoning the rats back to his room. Roman continued to reach behind his back and giggle.
"Now now, no cursing-" Patton now snapping out of his trance of adorableness.
"I'll curse if I wahant." Remus said, letting his last giggle slip.
"Ohoho, yohohou stahaharted ihihit byhy cheheheheatihing!" Roman shot back through his giggle fit.
Virgil giggled at the separate fights taking place, before calling the caterpillar back. "Come here, Silk." Virgil called. When the caterpillar was back, Virgil reached his hands out for his spider too. The spider crawled up the back and onto Roman's shoulder, before crawling down Roman's hand to Virgil's hand.
Roman's eyes widened. He paused his giggling. "S-SILK?! Thahat was YOURS?!" Roman yelled, pointing at Virgil.
Virgil nodded. "Mhm! It was only fair!" he commented. Patton sighed again.
"But Virgil! He started it with the damn rats!" Roman argued.
"Eh. I just wanted a turn." Virgil replied.
"If you wanted a turn, you could’ve come down here." Roman argued further.
Remus protested, interrupting the conversation. "Hey my rats didn’t climb on you, you fucking dunce." Remus whispers.
"Newsflash, buttface: no one was asking for your opinion." Roman whispered back.
Virgil giggles, at the twins' quiet fighting. "What are you going to do about it?" Virgil asked, answering Roman's last question before Remus interrupted them.
Roman smirked and made his new, trusty chipmunk appear in his hand. This time, with a red shirt that said 'Alvin' against its back. "Hi Alvin! There's an emo that would like to meet you!" Roman whispered in a baby voice as he walked over to the couch. "This is Virgil! And boy, oh boy, is he in need of some love!" Roman hinted.
Virgil's smirk fell as the feeling of impending doom began to fill his body. "R-Roman-" Virgil warned. Deceit giggles at Roman's idea, while petting his pet snake.
The chipmunk stood up on its hind legs and smelled the emo, before crawling onto the couch and right into one of Virgil’s pant rips. Virgil squealed at the tiny tickly claws crawling around on his bare skin. Remembering the last routine Roman had made, Alvin crawled up to Virgil's belly and began crawling around on it. Not only was Alvin crawling around on his belly, Alvin was also sniffing his belly at the same time! All of this, caused Virgil to start squealing and laughing again.
"Dohohohon't snihihihihihiff!" Virgil begged, doing all he can to not curl in and squish the poor chipmunk. The sniffing was especially getting to Virgil because Alvin the Chipmunk was using his soft little whiskers to better learn about the belly he was on. Deceit chuckled in reaction, while Patton watched beside him.
"Ooh, keep going Alvin. What does his belly feel like? Is it warm from all the layers? Is he hiding a really cuddly belly?" Roman asked out loud.
The truth was: Virgil's skin was extremely soft! but, no one will ever need to know. "EEE! gehehehet him ouhouhouhouhout! Rohohohohomahahahan!" Virgil begged.
"Nah. You seem to be enjoying this!" Roman cooed back.
Virgil covered up his embarrassed, blushy face. He was NOT! This was not enjoyable! This was tickly, and strange, and revengeful, and-...okay, it was a little enjoyable...well, maaaaaybe it was A LOT enjoyable. But no one needed to know that! He had a reputation to uphold!
Meanwhile, Patton was just squealing excitedly and smiling widely. "Hahaha! this is just so adorable!" Patton squealed.
Now THAT was uncalled for! "Nohohot cuhuhuhute!" Virgil argued, refusing to allow himself to be seen as cute.
"Ha! That sounds like a lie. Would I be right about that, Deceit?" Roman asked. Deceit nodded his head as he sat beside Roman's lee.
"Yeah, it is adorable kiddo!" Patton added.
Virgil's blush visibly deepened to a light scarlet color. "Nooooohoho!" Virgil groaned through his giggles.
Soon though, Roman decides to lessen the tickles. "Alright Alvin. You can slow down. Go ahead and have a little snuggle in there for a bit.” Roman encouraged. Alvin did what Roman said, and curled into Virgil's stomach. Virgil's laughs began to drop down to soft giggles as he began refilling his lungs. Roman giggled as he noticed Alvin curling further into Virgil’s tummy. “He seems to like you.” Roman said with a smile.
"Obviouhuslyhy..." Virgil added, still giggly from the ball of fur that was laying on his belly.
Patton walked closer to Virgil and ruffled Virgil's hair. "You can't deny how cute this is, y'know" he said with a smile.
"Nuuuhu." Virgil replied, sticking his tongue out. Virgil still refused to let anyone call him cute, and that may never change.
Deceit slowly made his way to the exit, believing that his presence there was no longer needed. He walked himself to his room and closed his door behind him. Remus and Patton began to leave as well. Patton began rambling on and on about how cute Virgil and Roman were, while Remus attempted to listen, low key praying that Patton wouldn't mention his own tickle attack.
Virgil and Roman stayed together on the couch, admiring his chipmunk as he slept on Virgil's belly. While admiring the cute little creature, Roman couldn't help but give Virgil little tickles here and there on his belly. It was just too cute to handle. Not only that, but Roman discovered something incredible:
Virgil has a SUPER soft belly!
No wonder Alvin loved sleeping on him!
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Semi-live Blogging: Return of the Mao Mao Episodes
Before we start, is it just me or is the animation like 10x smoother than it usually is? Also like I said with Nakey, there’s a lot more good expressions too!
Lucky Ducky Mug
Adorabat drinks from sippy cup like baby
"What, Mao Mao's ridiculous mug?" says Badgerclops, holding a cheap plastic big gulp cup he probably got from the grocery store.
How did Adorabat not notice the Lucky Ducky sticker on the Aerocycle
"Don't touch it" (Badgerclops proceeds to slam the table to move it) Ah Badgerclops, ever the contrarian
I'M SORRY DID MAO MAO BLOW THE ROOF OFF OF HQ BY SCREAMING
I love the way Mao says "PROFESSIONAAAL SILENCEEE"
Badgerclops trying to make his mouth disappear and failing made me scream with laughter
Are they seriously reducing Ratarang to 'the funny lil Italian guy'? C’mon guys you’re better than this
Wait why do they think Kevin is Adorabat?? They've seen Adorabat multiple times?? "But they're both blue!" You FOOL Kevin is TEAL there's a difference
Everybody gangsta til Mao Mao's ears start speaking morse code
They're doing surprisingly good silent but it's probably not gonna be that way very long.
Thank you, Lucky Ducky Mug, for catering to my niche interest in characters with neon outlines on black backgrounds.
Mao Mao thinking: Normal thoughts
Badgerclops thinking: Musical-esque singing
Adorabat thinking: Literally just heavy metal
The Sweetypies seriously think they're just playing a really intense game of charades huh,,,
(Mao jabs BC in the stomach with the fire net) HAHA GET REKT
The scene with Badgerclops trying to give Mao Mao Penny's mug is the funniest shit in the world I couldn't stop laughing...or maybe I'm just sleep-deprived
So the Sky Pirates are so similar compared to the Sheriff's Dept. that they can think perfectly in sync? That's cool
SKY PIRATES SONG SKY PIRATES SONG
Why is Snugglemagne throwing a random tea party & why did he only invite the Sheriff's Dept.
Yep there goes the plan. Both of their plans.
Am I going crazy or did the skin on Mao Mao's mouth tear apart like it was sewn shut?! Also yay they're talking again
"It's not gonna stop charging, so I'm just gonna let it explooode..." Mood
"What about the mega laser tube made by mega Losers?" Fsfhkfh
Hey, everyone learned something new from this experience! Are the Sky Pirates gonna try that Hive Mind tactic from now on?
Awww, they fixed his mug with gold - GOD DAMN IT I KNEW THERE WAS A CATCH!!
Lonely Kid
(Sighs) ...I said (SIGHS)
"I literally can't relate to that problem at all." says Badgerclops, who joined a gang because he wanted people to like him.
Shin just dropped off Mao Mao at a summer camp and expected him to make friends? Why does this feel like the plot of Camp Camp
I'm sorry the Mao clan has a freaking PARTY AERO-BUS??
NOO GERALDINE
That BGM is DEFINITELY an extended version of "I Love You, Mao Mao" and I want the lyrics NOW
So Bao was literally just a stray that Mao took home?? Would make sense as to why he wasn't trained
I have a feeling the Flimborg is some sort of sacred being the townspeople worship for some reason
How in the hell did Mao tie that guy up and why didn't he bother to untie him
HOW'D HE SET THE ROCKS ON FIRE USING PAINT
"And then you become frien-" "BEES. IN THE EYES."
"Everyone knows bees are our friends!" "Uh, actually, they were wasps." "Friends to no-one!" Usually I'd agree with BC, but I read an article about someone befriending a wasp and her babies so.
So the Mao clan's just known as the "Golden Cat Family Up The Hill?" Huh. I thought they’d have more recognition, especially since Shin says he went to that same summer camp at the beginning.
Man those kids are jackasses
"Say hi to your mommy!" "I would if she was here..." Excuse me wHAT
Noo don't cry baby boi - tHEN BAO JUST TACKLES HIM ASFHDKDL
"Go away! I don't feel like laughing right now!"
Look. You can see the EXACT point Mao developed his adult personality
I know Mao Mao means well but that is gonna go terribly wrong.
"I AM A HERO! I WILL BE LOVED!!" Okay first of all OUCH, second of all THAT IS PAIN
This monster empty, YEET
Awww it was just a sweet little puppy-ish monster...and it was his BIRTHDAY
"Hi, Aunt Gloria!" (Pulls out pitchfork) BETRAYAL
He didn't feel bad about ruining the festival because he made a friend doing it I 💞💞💝💝💗💗
Thanks for that 'different times' comment cuz I don't want kids thinking being beat is normal.
"Just like you found me...and I'm your best friend!" Tbh I thought she was gonna say 'Me and Badgerclops' & that would make a lot more sense
Why are they fighting over who's his best friend they're obviously BOTH his best friends
I'm sorry did Badgerclops just call Adorabat a "little mutant"?? ARE THE SWEETYPIES MUTANTS??
Awww his friends love him sm...and he feels so loved too...💓💓💗💗💕💕
Try Hard
No one gives a shit about Pinky being kidnapped lol
"K for Copyright Infringement"
"You'll never be like me!" Oof a little harsh maybe?
"You've gotta learn to be your own kind of hero, in your own special way!" So THAT'S where it's from
"You just gotta...try hard." Hey, title drop!
Ngl the moment Mao Mao said "Badgerclops take the shot" I immediately thought of The Confession 3 by TomSka
"Up in a tree, little old me, about to do something...UGLY..." 7-year-old me sniping people on Halo 3 like
Why is he shooting them with gelatin tho? ...oh. Oh THAT'S why.
Tbh if I didn't have subtitles on I would've thought BC was saying "beep boop"
This badger and cat empty, YEET
Adorabat walking into the Skyship with only a walkie-talkie is giving me some sort of vibes...OH, Silent Hill! Or Tattletail
WHOOP HIS ASS SWEETIE
"Mao Mao would hide the body!" Very unsubtle there, wonder how it got past censors
"Ratarang, say something!" "Pasketti?" "THAT'S THE BRAT!"
Wait a sec, they can just use Badgerclops' arm to power the ship? Why didn't they try that in CapturedClops?
"Good thing my head is in here cuz I'm a-scared of heights!" Ramaraffe. Whose whole schtick is making herself taller. Is acrophobic?
"Because she's Sheriff's Department, that's how! >:3" "Also y'all tend to be pretty incompetent >X/"
Why does she keep trying to use the elevator when she can fly? Nvm she climbed up Badgerclops' arm
"Ooooh I'm also hereeee"
"JERK BUTT"
Why is the Omega Field just a bunch of broken glass? And why doesn't she just step around it?
"I can fly!" "She can fly!" "SHE FORGOT?!" Ooh that's why
"You're the best thing to ever happen to a bat like me." 💝💝💕💕💓💓
Wait she's talking through the walkie-talkie and her molts are there but she isn't there where is she?
Oh she was freeing the other two from the gelatin. No wonder Mao Mao almost threw up, it was bug flavored.
GET HIS ASS, HONEY!! ADORASLAP!!
I hope that 'Nah' means Adorabat's realized she needs to be herself instead of her just rejecting her individuality like I think it is.
Scared Of Puppets
Oh, so this takes place after Sleeper Sofa! Praying it's a fix-it episode...
"DISCARD ANYTHING THAT DOESN'T BRING YOU JOY!!" Fuckin Marie Kondo up in here
Oh no PTSD flashbacks. He's scared of them cuz one's head landed on his lap as a kid? Understandable have a nice day.
Who tf collapsed into a sobbing heap on the floor then leaps back up and insists they're fine? Mao Mao, apparently.
Hairless ape? Is that what they call humans or are they something different in general?
"TAKE ALL MY MONEY!!" What did BC want an antique puppet for if he had no idea Mao was scared of them...
Mr. Din Dandalib!
"I...(eye twitch) love him too..."
IM SORRY DID HE FUCKING THROW UP OUT OF FEAR...holy SHIT
If I scared my friend and they threw up I would simply never do that again. RIP to Badgerclops but I'm different
(Badgerclops makes concrete blocks around the pothole) "Why didn't you just fill in the pothole??" "I AM TRYING MY BEST!!"
"I SIGNED YOUR DUMB CAST, NOW LEAVE!!"
...Illegal house plants? ...like marijua-
That was literally just that one video where a guy knocked out another guy in a mask jumping out of a trash can...
So it's a CPR class...AND a hair-styling class? How
I stg the moment Badgerclops walked in the door I knew he was carrying Mr. Din Danalin I SWEAR
"You're 10." "BUT I'M 6??" JFC Shin doesn't know his own son's age AND is partially responsible for his pupaphobia. And I called it on Mao Mao being six in the flashbacks
OH WIG
Can someone take the footage of the Annex exploding and add the ReviewTechUSA intro over it please
"How many Adult Learning Annexes have to be destroyed before you admit you're scared of puppets?!" is extremely funny without context
(Mao punches the wall cuz hes mad at himself for being scared) Kinkinkinkinki
How does one forget to drink milk
Oh shit the scene from the promo...
Yay he's starting to feel less scared - wait NVM it JUST STARTED TALKING??
OG SGUTVKC FGCJ OG SHKR OF DJCN JKKKKK
Oh it was just a dream - er, nightmare. FIRST NIGHTMARE SEQUENCE OF THE SERIES!
"I just gotta get my socks on...wait, I wear socks, right?" Dud e you wear NOTHING BUT A BELT...
"I KNEW SELLING THOSE HAIRLESS APE DOLLS WOULD ATTRACT DARK FORCES"
"There’s a lot of pu-" "PUBLIC DANGER"
Those puppets are alive I stg
"I'M A BIG BOI..."
Awwww she said what he told her at the beginning of the episode!
"I'M AFRAID OF PUPPETS" TITLE DROP YET AGAIN
Adorabat takes after Badgerclops sometimes I swear
Oooh shit sequel hook - oh NVM it was Badgerclops voice acting - NVM Mao Mao passed out. Dang
The Perfect Couple
Watermelon time babyyy
TRANSFORMATION TIME BABYYYY
Ah so he wanted to perfectly cut a watermelon in half, that's why he got so many?
"I need (counts on fingers) 600 more watermelons!" glad to see I'm not the only one who counts on my fingers
Why would Penny and Benny need 600 watermelons for their wedding? Also I called it on Penny & Benny being the couple
Mao Mao has to officiate the wedding? I thought priests did that
Please don’t throw up again Mao Mao
"I WILL BUY YOU A BAG TO HOLD YOUR STUFF..."
"A nondescript sack!!" Dude he just taking out the trash...
Nvm its just laundry
"I WILL TURN THIS BUSH AROUND"
Oh so THAT'S what Ramaraffe thought Kevin was Adorabat
"Why don't you buy me cake and do my laundry?" Are you implying you wanna marry Mao Mao, Badgerclops 👀
I lov Mao Mao's faces in this scene he legit looks like a bishouen anime protagonist
Nvm no transformation it's just his wedding outfit
Why did they invite Orangusnake and Boss Hosstritch to the wedding tho? What about when they hid in their moving truck and used their electricity - wait Badgerclops technically did that last one, nvm
Wait THEY DIDN'T TALK TO EACH OTHER BEFORE THE WEDDING?? What a perfect couple huh
Is Mao Mao having hallucinations just gonna be a regular thing now....
IS PENNY SERIOUSLY GONNA MARRY ORANGUSNAKE OUT OF SPITE ASFSDGFUK
Why did Mao Mao say "melons" in a Spanish accent I'm scared
"They're both terrible, so what does it matter if they get hitched or not?" They're definitely gonna change their minds now
"She lied because she wanted to protect his feelings! And he lied because he couldn't bear to hurt her!" Isn't that just the plot of The Truth Stinks?
OH SHIT HE CUT ORANGUSNAKE IN HALF HOLY FUCK
He made Orangusnake officiate the wedding as punishment lol
Why are they,,,stepping on the watermelons?? Damn right Badgerclops I'd cry over that too
"What's, uh, your credit score like?" "850. Why, is that good?" "It's perfect..." HE WANTS TO MARRY MAO MAO NOW ASDFHKL
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‘Contaminated Pop’ - Lyrics Barry Andrews’ 2019 Solo Album
PUT ME TO WORK
I’ve been a groom
I‘ve worked the room
I’ve wrapped myself around a broom
back in my prime
I fixed the stats
I shaved the rats
Brought litter for the Thundercats
- so many times
(I’ve been a jerk)
PUT ME TO WORK!
O mighty plume!
O suffering moon!
O weasles in the drawing room!
(please make it fast)
enklastify my words right now
unruly gods will show me how
I’ll get the mule before the plough
until the last
I will not shirk
PUT ME TO WORK!
I’ll get the weight upon on my back
I’ll eat my body weight in thrak
I’ll holler by the railway track
(and holler loud!)
This Plasma-shift i cannot stop
Tumescence intra bellytop
Merch is flying out the shop.
and in the crowd,
are many perks...
PUT ME TO WORK!
O master fruit so tried and true
O solemn plague-rat kangaroo
Something to get my teeth into
is all I pray
now linear ducks have just arrived
the bullshit has metastasized
i am intensely exercised
O mood display!
Let’s go beserk...
PUT ME TO WORK!
PUT ME TO WORK!
SHIT-PIXIE
Don’t you feel in the spring
the sickening overkill of everything?
can’t help it
it’s all hard-wired now
All these earthly delights
Looking as silly as a bag of lights
Ah come on now
It’s gotta feel real tired now…
Hey Mary! Get Lairy!
You’re still off with the fairies
But you know what the whizz and the gelignite can do..
Don’t tangle, just jangle
Bring on the crimes and the scandals
I’m the Shit Pixie - I’m gonna dance for you.
Nothing real will impinge
on the fierce exertions of your perma-binge.
Working for you? Got it in hand now?
But you won’t draw the sting
with your classical allusions and your broken wing.
I’m gonna draw you a line in the sand now
So shabby! Gabby! Get yourself back to the abbey
you can tell the enqiuiry what and when you knew
They concluded what you did was totally scuppered and scoobied
I’m the Shit Pixie and I’m gonna tell you true
All the gears grind for you
but the light still shines on Column 32
It’s an idea (might make it worse now)
Nothing glows in the night
and you feel sexy as an ammonite
all your virtues are a kind of curse now
Ah Mimi! It’s dreamy!
if you shut your eyes you can see me
I’m a horse of a different colour boiled to glue.
Ignore it; just floor it.
It’s so shot-away-in-the-war it’s just the Shit Pixie
who’s got a thing for you..
Virgin of the Ladder
I really dig your chiaroscuro
it gives me something I can misconstrue
these sickly martyrs make me feel alright:
they give me something I can live up to
I guess this is where the magic happens:
an epiphany of stone and light?
Blue-collar… of the Madonna
to bring in something from the building site.
O my Virgin of the Ladder
will you be with me when I start to climb?
Gravity I’m overcoming
Nothing doing when it comes to Time
in this year without a summer
when I lost everything I thought was mine
all the pain and the sheeting rain
and I’m sorry baby that was the last of the wine
and I know I can change
but there’s only so much a ladder will do
D’you want an acolyte
that is so scared of heights?
rung by rung I’m climbing up to you
O virgin of the ladder
grant me only that I do not fall
towards the centre of the earth
Ah keep that ladder up against the wall
Oh Virgin of the Ladder
what a pretty gal you are
maybe a slow climbdown into the squalid town
Light a candle on the way to the bar
it’s laboured as an image
overused as a metaphor
for spiritual ascension
(Blake and Jacob did it long before)
but you are Mother of the Word Incarnate
but what good are words when you want deeds?
- you need practical KIT
when you’re deep in the shit
and that ladder’s gonna meet my needs
O my Virgin of the Ladder
will you be with me when I start to climb?
Gravity I’m overcoming
Nothing doing when it comes to Time
ABDOMEN JONES
she will never understand all the tragic flaws of man
and has not the slightest sympathy for anyone who can
she disdains all protocol
(she finds much distainable)
still she has nothing in the quiver she’s unable to deliver
Calling Abdomen Jones
I love Abdomen Jones
and her animus is tidal
Paging Abdomen Jones
- with her 3 mobile phones -
she says: ‘work is the blackmail of survival’
Honey badger isn’t fussed
he has transcended disgust
….and it’s known that Jones
atones for anything she must
Doesn’t claim to be profound
never takes the Higher Ground
She is fully hypostatic
- you should hear her in the attic…
Calling Abdomen Jones
Strength to Abdomen Jones!
with all her subtle modulations
Paging Abdomen Jones
with her libido made of chrome
she says: ‘pain is a kind of information’
And in any case she sees
she is queen of all the bees
(as she has some fun and stuns us
with her fluent Javanese).
And who tunes the concert grand?
who will now conduct the band?
Her case is prima facie
(takes the Beethoven quite pacy)
Calling Abdomen Jones
Lovely Abdomen Jones
she makes the sound of steam escaping
Paging Abdomen Jones
she does just fine on her own
says: ‘caresses are a form of scraping..’
LOLLIPOP BOMB
Darling monster,
sweety-pie..
my mind is wandering sadly I
must walk into the reeds`
terribly corroded and
the saints have crumbled into sand
they will not intercede
And I carress the velvet hand grenade
my part is played and yes-
the windows are steamy
so no-one can see me
I lick the Lollipop Bomb
I lick the Lollipop Bomb
hark the hot valkyries cry
their flaxen hair and crazy eyes
they come at last for me
honey angel
baby lamb
I am not what you think I am
and i will never be
and I will dally in the sullen glade
I’m not afraid
of al that I will be streaming
at twilight’s last gleaming
I lick the Lollipop Bomb
I lick the Lollipop Bomb
tho I was galloping along
I read all the portents wrong
the Golden Age could never last that long
we are not brave we are not free
and yet somehow, remarkably,
are able to apall
this thinning crowd
here in this place
the baffled looks upon their faces
really says it all
and I will freak out when the time arrives
it’s very clear to me
that life is a long song and
I sang the wrong one
I lick the Lollipop Bomb
I lick the Lollipop Bomb
FILTHY WONDERLAND
Come with me if you will
- my imaginary friends -
I have a tale to tell
of phosphors and vapour.
Upon a tiny screen
i saw a magic realm
though i was overwhelmed
I got it down on paper.
there’s a scenario:
a woman and a wasp
not everybody’s thing
but no doubt it’s someone’s
tumescent butterflies
are spurting everywhere:
to get the full effect you can even become one
there is a land of wonders
and a lot are for hire
where all pay homage to
the glories of the gland.
Do it with Dumbo’s mummy
if that is your desire
there’s nothing you can’t do
in Filthy Wonderland
Some legendary beasts
preposterously endowed
throw down a fairy girl
with wings and tiara.
The hobbit looking on
is visibly aroused
to see these monsters ride
the lovely Titania
…and Things with tentacles -
that penetrate the bum,
A massive squirrel with
a fearsome erection
the whole environment
inclusive as they come,
pushing the envelope
of natural selection…
There is a brave new vision
that machines have designed
(the old pornographers
will never understand)
such complicated pleasures
for the liberal mind
this is the way of things
in Filthy Wonderland
a rampant unicorn;
a goblin in a thong:
sexual complexity
well beyond triangular
little Red Riding Hood
encountering the wolf
in ways (you have to say)
are specifically glandular
Phantasmagoria:
the Japanese Depraved
My Little Pony is
away on a hack there.
Some mythic masterplan
- the lion fellates the lamb -
(I need to think this through
before I go back there)
There’s an enchanted garden
with a final frontier:
a blessed Shangri-La
to greet with your left hand.
they put the magic in you
in a new ecosphere
a brave and weird new worldc
in Filthy Wonderland
There is a land of wonders
(and a lot you can buy)
where all pay homage to
the glories of the gland.
Make it with all the cast and crew of Family Guy
nothing’s denied to you
in Filthy Wonderland..
CONSOLATION
Christ, here comes the storm again that lacerates the heart:
the savage wind of ‘really nothing doing’.
Pray for us the blighted: all the failed in love and art,
who question everything they were pursuing.
When the black dogs come for you
well, what else can you do,
but downwardly revise your expectations?
Just kiss the sickly little rose
and hold her steady as she goes
as you light out for those lands of Consolation
All the aching moments when it didn’t go your way
(we saw it all and none of it was pretty)
Now you hear their voices in the gruesome light of day,
with the wheezing, cheap harmonium of self pity.
And there’s some sad things known to man -
and quite a few are sadder than
the sodden Paggliacci’s ruminations -
but still you’d have a heart of stone to leave the poor clown on his own
with half a bottle left of Consolation.
When you’ve failed to consummate
the wedding of the soul
or any other union you may yearn for
Let the baby demons come and stretch you on the coals
There’s nothing else you’d really care to burn for.
Well it really isn’t fun
and it comes for everyone
it hauls you off
despite your protestations.
But all the Saints of Legoland;
the Poundshop Martyrs hand in hand
Will wash you in the seas of Consolation.
Satan in a monster truck
Jesus on a bike
all these things are sent to test your mettle
Half-mast flags in Whitehall
or your head upon a spike?
Depends on where the dust is when it settles.
All the things you struggled for
you can check em at the door
get ready for a dubious sedation.
It’s all designed to reassure:
the bingo and the talking cure,
as they walk you round the grounds of Consolation
Feel the Need
(lyric by Abrim Tilmon - Detroit Emeralds)
See how I’m walking
See how I'm talking
Notice everything in me
Feel the need, oh
Feel, feel the need in me
I need you by my side
To be my guide
Can't you see my arms
Are open wide?
Feel the need, oh
Feel, feel the need in me
Every day, I need
every day, I want,
without your sweet
Sweet love, I'd rather die
I need it constantly
your love takes care of me
your love is better
To me than apple/cherry pie
Your love is tuff
and I can't get enough
Girl, your love is
So important to me
Feel the need, feel the need in me
Just put your hand in mine
Love me all the time
The proof you will
Plainly see,
Feel the need, oh
Feel, feel the need in me
I need you on the case
To keep my heart in place
You make me what I need to be
Feel the need,
Feel the need in me
I need you by my side
To be my guide
Can't you see my arms
Are open wide?
Feel the need, oh
Feel it, feel the need in me
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1 2 4 7 8 9 13 18 20 26 27 29 30 32 39 40 41 43/44 45 46 49 51 53 55 56 57 59 63 65 that is. so many dghsdghsdgv I'm sorry I just see an ask meme and go crazy aaaa go stupid aaaa. You can just answer whichever u like from those!! also 69(nice): you seem rly nice and funny from your 🅱️osts and I appreciate u... I hope you can find better irl friends who aren't trash
HDSKFJKS I completely understand but lucky for u I LOVE to talk !!
1) How are you?
Pretty good, actually!! Which is a nice change of pace. I went to Walmart with some friends yesterday and got a few things, baked a family recipe that my friends LOVE, and finally did my laundry (it’s been a couple weeks we love depression and executive dysfunction dfhkjsfd). I went to Cracker Barrel with some friends and earlier and played a 4-way game of Tetris after. :3c
2) Post a picture of yourself.
Here you go !!
4) What is your entire name?
Sierra Alexis and my last name is something constantly misspelled so I’ll give you the name of a historical figure whose name is a letter off from mine: George B. McClellan, to whom I may or may not be related because last name variations are fuckin’ WEIRD.
7) Your zodiac/horoscope and if you think it fits your personality.
I’m a Capricorn sun and moon, and Libra rising !! And from what I’ve read on Twitter from various astrologers, like Milkstrology, I LOVE her, I’d say it’s pretty accurate with my personality!! I like to say Capricorn’s aren’t cold bitches but, I Have A Tendency To Be One !!
8) What did you do on your last birthday?
God what DID I do on my last birthday… it was in January, so like, I SHOULD remember… OH I went to IHOP with my friends !! I share a birthday with another friend and I got a JoJo notebook and something called a Fuggler! They’re stuffed animals more or less but designed to be “ugly.” I got one that looks like Philadelphia Flyers mascot Gritty because I LOVE Gritty… he’s so fun and funky.
9) What is one thing you’d like to accomplish before your next birthday?
Get all my requests in my inbox over on my writing blog done KJHFDJKSF it’s been a few months and life has been. Hectic to say the least.
13) If you could change your eye color, would you?
There’s so much weird as hell brown-eye-phobia so like… I think blue eyes would be pretty neat. OR PURPLE… give me some unnatural eye colors pls...
18) Do you have any tattoos?
Not yet!! I’m going to get one the next time I go back home for break. :3c And I have a few ideas for other ones!! I wanna get a big-ass “Dragon Age: Origins” tattoo that’s the dragon on the cover on my thigh. I also wanna get a DA2 and “Inquisition” tattoo… and the Joestar birthmark… too many ideas…
20) Left or right handed?
Right-handed !! I could have been left-handed or ambidextrous if I broke my arm AFTER I started kindergarten, but alas that was before.
26) Something you are working on right now:
This !! But also the script for my next podcast episode that I record on uhhh Monday I think. Should probably figure that one out dsjfjhsf
27) Do you have any “rules” about food?
I answered that in the last ask !!
29) What would you say is your best quality?
I also answered this in the last ask !!
30) What do you think you’re really good at?
Writing, I’d say! And memorizing trivia about the stuff I’m super into. If it’s stuff pertaining to “M*A*S*H” or old movies or TV shows or actors or specific historical events, I will know that shit FOR LIFE. Don’t ask me to do math pls thank u
32) What talent do you wish you’d been born with?
I wish I was able to do stuff with music. That was never really in my blood, despite all the music classes they make you take in elementary school. I just never learned how to memorize or read sheet music. :/ I would have loved to play violin, tho… my friend plays and she says I would have been a good cellist.
39) Do you sleep with a stuffed toy?
YES… have for years. I still have my Care Bear from when I was 5, Gritty as mentioned above, a plush of my school’s mascot, and a little Fugo !! He’s so tiny.
40) What do you think about the most?
Everything and constantly and all at once. But the past really because I can never let stuff go and even the small things I mess up on haunt me forever… Wish that wasn’t the case but it is !!
41) Share two habits:
Biting my nails and having a very specific routine in which I get ready when I wake up. Like, I’ve gotta go brush my hair before I put my important cards in my left pocket, then put on my silver bracelet, then my beaded bracelet, then my earbuds in my right pocket, then put my earrings in. I HAVE to do it in that order…
And other oddities that include, like, if I need to go around something I HAVE to follow the urge to go one way and not the other, lest I feel the need to go back and fix it. And then which foot goes first before I reach a crack in the sidewalk, or up or down a curb, etc.
43) What are your career goals?
If I can just make people happy or get some kind of joy out of the things I do, I’d call that enough. :)
44) What is your ideal career?
Mmm, either a film historian or a film professor !! Preferably at the college I’m at right now but wherever the wind takes me, I’ll go! Or a Twitch streamer or YouTuber, it really depends on my mood jdhfjskf
45) Is your life anything like it was two years ago?
It was pretty much the same !! Freshman year was pretty lively, I didn’t have a job on campus yet though, or my podcast. Everything else is basically the same!
46) Do you replay things that have happened in your head?
CONSTANTLY… good or bad it’ll play back over and over and over again.
49) Do you have any phobias?
HOO BOY, DO I… fear of heights; fear of insects/bugs/arachnids/bees/wasps; I have a strong dislike of the number 13 but I don’t know if it’s a phobia, I just. REALLY hate it; the unknown, more or less what lurks somewhere beyond where I can see. Not so much a fear of the dark with that one, just what could BE in it.
51) Are you allergic to anything? If so, what?
I answered this in my last ask, as well!
53) Ever come close to death?
Two or three times, maybe? Two of them involved what’s called a laryngospasm, typically it can happen when your sick, which is what happened to me both times. Basically your throat just closes up on your for a hot minute and you can’t breathe. The first time I genuinely thought I was going to die (and my dad still sent me to school that day… HOE), the second time I was also sick and was losing/had lost my voice DURING A JOB RETREAT and it happened in the middle of the night so that was funny sitting there gasping for breath in the pitch dark.
At the FIRST retreat I went on for that job, you had to take pictures as part of a scavenger hunt, and the place used to be an old military fort, so there were still the old bunkers there. We had to take one on top of it and I was taking the picture, and it’s a wide shot so I go to take a step back but before I do I look behind me. If I hadn’t I would have fallen a good 10-15 feet down onto solid Civil War-era bunker concrete. I’d consider that being a “close to death” moment because I really could have died!
55) A random fact about yourself:
I have a half-brother !! My sis and I finally found him after her 23andMe results came back (which she decided to do despite us being like THE GOVERNMENT WILL COLLECT OUR DATA) and we didn’t think our mom would be happy she found him but she was !! My sis might reach out and contact him, she just wanted our mom’s permission first to do it.
56) What are three things most people don’t know about you?
Well, that I have a half-brother. I don’t mention it a lot. Aside from y’all on here and my sister, most everyone else doesn’t know I’m nonbinary! Everyone else knows I’m bi though lmao. And that there were times I’d stretch or bend the truth or lie about something just to impress someone else. It’s a… Bad Habit. Another thing is that most people don’t know I like coffee? Like I need to put a shit ton of creamer in with it because I’m a Bitch, but yeah.
57) An unknown fact about your life:
I wouldn’t call this an “unknown” fact but I’d used to go to work with my dad every now and again when he worked at the Home Depot and he was assistant manager. I’d either chill in the back room which was an office he shared with two other guys, or walk around the store with him. I had my own apron, too, which was my name with “Mini Mac” next to it, “Mac” being my dad’s nickname and something easier to say than my last name. I actually helped a few customers out so I wonder if I should have gotten paid for that despite being like, ages 9-13 when I’d go jshfkjd
And I guess I technically tested video games as a kid? Basically, when my dad was stationed at Fort Knox, they’d get demos of video games that hadn’t come out yet to test I suppose? and I still have a few somewhere. He’d hand them off to me and I’d play them so there’s that.
59) Five weird things that you like:
Eating globs of wasabi for no reason.
Scaring my friends also for no reason.
I wouldn’t say using cotton swabs to get wax out of your ears because it feels good is weird, just more medically inadvisable if anything.
When I was younger I’d like to floss really hard because the slight pain from it felt good. Young me was a #Freaque KJHDFJJDHF
I don’t know if being fond of alphabetizing and reorganizing things is considered weird but I LOVE doing that.
63) A quote you try to live by:
“It matters not how strait the gate, / How charged with punishments the scroll; / I am the master of my fate: / I am the captain of my soul.” It’s from the poem “Invictus” and the last two lines are what I’m getting tattooed !!
65) Weird things you do when you’re alone:
Practice the “Lucky Star” dance. I GOT THE LYRICS DOWN… JUST NEED TO DO THE DANCE NOW…
69) Leave me a compliment:
“you seem rly nice and funny from your 🅱️osts and I appreciate u... I hope you can find better irl friends who aren't trash”
Anon pls 🥺 I do my best to be nice but my friend really do test me sometimes... my feelings bounce back n forth like if they do something my feelings can switch to angry or like, hate, and then if they do something nice I’ll like them again. It sucks but ! I just take it one day at a time. Anon I care for u 💜💜💜
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Henlo, it's me, your local trash monster here to say I love Hannah and I can't wait to hear more about her?? That being said, GIMME ALL THE SAD GOODS ABOUT HER. But also add in something happy about her in the end! ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ ((Also sending hugs! I know things have been stressful the last few days so just know I'm rooting for you !!))
Holy fuck I think this is the first time someone’s ever told me to cut loose and just SAY ALL THE THINGS AND I’M SO EXCITED!!!! :D
(Answers under the cut because I just went with the entire list. I have no self control.
And thank you for the hugs and encouragement!)
1. What is one word to shut them up: Okay, for some context, Hannah is a lawyer. She has a thick skin (unlike me, heyoooo). It takes a lot to shut her up; she’s an HBIC and she owns it.
But if someone starts talking about her scars (she’s struggled/struggles with self-harm), she shuts down. It’s a part of her she’s still self-conscious about, and if someone mentions it she’ll literally stop mid-sentence and mentally exit the conversation.
2. What is the thing they feel the most guilty about: Again, she’s got a pretty thick skin, so she doesn’t hold onto too much. Life happens, you make mistakes, and it’s better to learn from them rather than beat yourself over the head for something you can’t change anyway.
If there’s something she’s going to feel guilty about, though, it’s fights or incidents she’s had with family members/close friends where she’s hurt them with something she’s said or done. She holds herself in high accountability to ensure that she doesn’t step all over people, and when she does she fails not only them but her expectations for herself, so yeah. Guilt.
3. What is the worst pain they’ve ever experienced: Physical pain? Probably different injuries from her career in martial arts. She’s a tough cookie, but some of that stuff just hurts.
Emotional pain? Anytime she fails her expectations for herself. She has very high standards for herself, and when she can’t reach them she becomes very depressed (more so than usual).
4. Describe their worst nightmare: Actual dream? Anything where she’s drowning or running out of air. She almost drowned a couple times as a child/preteen, and the trauma still emerges in her adult life from time to time.
Real life “this is a nightmare” scenario? Any point where her depression gets so bad that she stops being functional. Things just start piling up and get overwhelming very quickly.
5. List 3 fears; one “surface level” fear, one “repressed” fear, and one “deep dark” fear: 1.) Drowning, which runs pretty deep but it’s an obvious one that she’s done a lot of therapy work for, and she doesn’t mind talking about it with other people. 2.) Wasps. She accidentally got locked into a shed with an active wasp nest in it as a child. She made it out alright, but the sheer terror of the situation made her repress the memory. She’s heard the story from friends and family, and “gets” why she’s scared of the fuckers, but can’t actually recall the incident itself. 3.) The dark. A side effect of depression is paranoia, and when she’s alone, in the dark, she can’t shake the feeling that there’s some sort of creature watching/following her. When her depression gets really bad, she has to sleep with a light on to keep from flipping out.
6. What is something that never fails to make them feel sick: She’s not naturally squeamish, but the sounds of belching (ala college frat boys, y’all know what I mean) make her stomach churn.
7. What feature (physical or otherwise) do they hate most about themselves: Her scars. She’s very ashamed of them, and goes out of her way to wear long sleeved shirts so she can hide them.
8. Do they have anything that triggers them: Feeling like she’s failed her own expectations/expectations others have of her, accidentally inhaling water, the ‘buzzing’ sound bees/wasps make.
9. What is their greatest physical weakness: Her height. She might be a kickass lawyer and an even kick-assier martial artist, but she barely clears five feet.
10. What is their greatest mental weakness: Her struggles with self-hatred. She’s her own worst enemy a lot of the time.
11. Do they have any vices: Not really. Not as far as serious vices go. She’s pretty grounded.
12. Have they ever done something illegal? What was it: Nope. She knew she wanted to be a lawyer from day one and made sure her record was spotless.
13. Which of the 7 Deadly Sins best describes them: Pride? I think that one comes closest? Again, since she really doesn’t have a vice or a thorn in her side, it’s hard to pick something for her.
I think Pride comes closest because she spirals when she fails to live up to her own expectations, which I think often comes with a bit of ego (at least in my experience with that sort of thing). She’s also got a lot to be proud of (lawyer, martial artist, financially independent), but she’s not a walking ego either?
Idk. This is a weird question, lol.
14. Are they prone to outbursts (of violence, extreme emotion… exc… ): Not really. Don’t get me wrong, she can get there, but it takes a lot. She’s very collected (and usually swings the opposite way; she’s more likely to cold shoulder you if she’s mad).
She does threaten to shove her Prada stiletto sideways up Hank Pym’s ass, though. So there’s that.
15. Who do they hate the most: Guys who use her height against her by cornering her into spots while they try to ask her out/talk to her about something. It’s the fastest way to wind up on her shit list.
16. Is there anyone who makes them feel inferior: Herself. She’s her own worst enemy.
17. What sound always gives them a headache: Her coworker Tracey’s text/notification sound. Which is always going off because Tracey’s always talking to someone.
18. Is there a certain flavor that disgusts them: Not really. She’s half Japanese, half ethnic Jew, and a practicing Jew to boot, so she grew up on a pretty broad flavor palette.
She’s tried a bacon cheeseburger once on a dare, though, and she hated it.
19. Do they consider themselves ugly: Not really (outside of her scars). She’s pretty confident in her appearance.
20. Do they consider themselves unloveable: Again, not really. She’s spent a lot of time in therapy, which helps, but she’s always had her feet pretty well on the ground.
21. What is something that causes them great anxiety: The prospect of losing. She’s very competitive.
22. Do they have any mental illnesses: Depression.
23. Have they ever been assaulted/abused/raped: She’s run into the usual guys that like to try and use her size against her, but they usually wind up worse for wear than she does.
24. Do they fear the possibility of being assaulted/abused/raped: Yes. She’s five feet tall and doesn’t clear 110 lbs. She’s very aware that she’s got “TARGET” written across her back.
25. Have they ever been betrayed by someone they thought they could trust: Fortunately, no. Most of her close relationships come from communities she knows well (school, work, the temple she attends in LA), so she hasn’t had to deal with too much betrayal.
26. Have they ever been seriously injured: Yes. Even outside of her struggles with self-harm, she’s a martial artist. She’s broken a few bones over the years from that.
27. How many times have they been in the hospital: Five. Three for some pretty drastic self harm incidents, and two from sparring injuries.
28. Is there a certain type of person that disgusts them: Obviously, she has frustrations with asshole guys, racists/anti-Semites, but she cannot stand people who work in organizations that prey on the disenfranchised (ala military recruiters going to schools in impoverished areas to fill their quota because they know how to trick the kids into trying out and all that). It gets her blood boiling fast.
29. Does what they cannot see scare them: Yes. Again, this shows perfectly with her fear of the dark.
30. Have they ever been bullied: Yupp. For her heritage, her beliefs, her mental health struggles, her size... High school sucks.
31. Do they have self-confidence or self-image issues: Yes and no. Again, she’s pretty confident about most things in life, but she does have certain weak points (her scars, living up to her own expectations, her height).
32. Do they have a bad relationship with their parents: Actually, no! She has a good relationship with both her parents and her extended family!
33. Have they ever been in a relationship that didn’t work out so well: Not in the drastic sense of things. She’s been through a few break ups, sure, but nothing that was abusive or crazy.
34. Have they ever self harmed: Yes. It’s something she still struggles with as an adult.
35. If they could change one thing about themselves, what would it be: Her scars. She’d make them disappear.
36. Are they in control of their emotions, or are their emotions in control of them: She’s pretty well in control of her emotions.
37. Have they ever had their freedom taken away: Not really, no.
38. Have they ever been imprisoned: Nope.
39. Have they ever been accused of something they didn’t do: Not in any serious sense. Her reputation for toeing the line was too well known for her to be accused of something she didn’t do.
40. Do they often blame themselves for other people’s problems: She did as a teenager, but dutiful therapy and self-care has helped her outgrow that habit.
41. Do they get sick often: Nope! She’s pretty healthy.
42. Are they comfortable with where they are in life: She’s content, but not complacent.
43. Do they wish that they could change their pasts: Yes. Again, she doesn’t like her history with self-harm. If she could erase that, she would.
44. What’s one thing they wish they could do more often, but can’t: Travel. Her job’s pretty demanding as far as hours go.
45. What is the emotion they most commonly experience: Melancholy. No matter what she’s doing, it’s sort of always hanging around her, like a tiny cloud.
46. Have they ever contemplated suicide: Yes. Unfortunately, it’s a side effect of the depression.
47. Have they ever gone so far as to attempt suicide: A couple of times, when she was teenager.
48. Is there anyone that they would willingly kill: Outside of self-defense/the defense of others? No.
49. If [name] was put into ______ situation, they’d rather die than live to see it through: Being forced to reject her identities as a Jew/person of Japanese heritage. Her families have made it through so much (internment camps, persecution, the Holocaust), and she’d rather die than erase her own identity.
50. Create your own: Alright, I’m gonna put the happy one here so we end on a high note!
She’s a firm believer in the need for “mah” (the Japanese word for “emptiness), or a moment to pause and do nothing. It’s easy to see that reflected in how she practices meditation, follows Shabbat, or takes time each day to simply be.
However, she also believes that the principle of “mah” is what makes her and Luis work so well as a couple. She is the silence to his constant chatter and helps him keep his feet on the ground. Likewise, he keeps her from living inside her head and helps her connect to the world.
They’re just such opposites attract. Ugh, I love them so much!
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Thank you for tagging me @raven-reyes-of-sunshine! <3 Tagging: @clxrkeblxke, @hedaalicia, @maddigriffin, @clarkgriffon, @clarkegriffintitties
1. What is your nickname? Kat
2. How old are you? 21
3. What is your birth month? may
4. What is your zodiac sign? taurus
5. What is your favorite color? blue
6. What’s your lucky number? 14. Don’t know why lol
7. Do you have any pets? nope :(
8. Where are you from? Southeast of England
9. How tall are you? 5′ 10″
10. What shoe size are you? 7/8
11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? probably a hundred lol, I have a problem
12. Are you random? for sure
13. Last person you texted? a friend telling her I left the key in the pigeon hole for her, long story
14. Are you psychic in any way? not really, apart from that thing where you get a bad feeling about a particular person and it ends up being true
15. Last TV show watched? Love Island. I know it’s trash, don’t hate me!
16. Favorite movie? The Breakfast Club, always and forever
17. Favorite show from your childhood? I used to watch iCarly religiously
18. Do you want children? definitely
19. Do you want a church wedding? yes!
20. What is your religion? I’m Catholic
21. Have you ever been to the hospital? Yep, had my appendix removed when I was 10, and then summer before last I had another surgery which, for the life of me, I can’t remember the name of
22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? of course not i’m a lawyer lol
23. How is life? stressful but good (literally copying Elyse’s answer because it’s spot on)
24. Baths or showers? showers
25. What color socks are you wearing? white with frilly bits on top
26. Have you ever been famous? nah
27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? definitely not. Too much work.
28. What type of music do you like? top chart would describe it best really
29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? no, but maybe in the future lol
30. How many pillows do you sleep with? always two
31. What position do you usually sleep in? on my side
32. How big is your house? three bedroom and two bathroom house, I live with my mum and my sister
33. What do you typically have for breakfast? I always eat porridge
34. Have you ever left the country? Yes, been to quite a few countries in Europe and to the US
35. Have you ever tried archery? nope
36. Do you like anyone? nope
37. Favorite swear word? shoot (I don’t swear out loud, just in text lol)
38. When do you fall asleep? definitely after midnight
39. Do you have any scars? quite a few scars on my knees because I was the most active kid in the world, a scar from when my appendix was removed, and I think that’s it?
40. Sexual orientation? straight
41. Are you a good liar? I can be, but my sister can always tell when I’m lying
42. What languages would you like to learn? Spanish and Italian. Would love to.
43. Top 10 songs? they change too often, I’ve literally been listening to Cell Block Tango on repeat for the last few days
44. Do you like your country? I wouldn’t want to live anywhere else really
45. Do you have friends from the web? I have some great friends here! <3
46. What is your personality type? Does this mean MBTI? I’m an ESFP.
47. Hogwarts House? slytherin
48. Can you curl your tongue? yes
49. Pick one fictional character you can relate to? Jean Louise Finch from Go Set a Watchman.
50. Left or right handed? right
51. Are you scared of spiders? terrified. But I never want to kill them, so I have to do this thing where I get a plastic container and catch the spider, while shitting myself, and let it go outside
52. Favorite food? I really like sandwiches, that’s probably boring but oh well
53. Favorite foreign food? any Asian food really, unless it’s spicy, I can’t handle spicy food
54. Are you a clean or messy person? clean and a neat freak really
55. If you could switch your gender for a day, what would you do? no clue, i’d probably hate it
56. What color underwear? deep red
57. How long does it take for you to get ready? depends on whether I have to straighten my hair or not, I do it every other day. 30 minutes without straightening, and probably 40-45 with straightening.
58. Do you have much of an ego? not really lol
59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? both
60. Do you talk to yourself? sometimes and it’s weird lol
61. Do you sing to yourself? constantly
62. Are you a good singer? yes, I took lessons for like 15 years of my life and my father’s actually a musician! :)
63. Biggest Fears? bees and wasps
64. Are you a gossip? I don’t like to bitch about people, but I like knowing other people’s secrets.
65. Are you a grammar nazi? yep
66. Do you have long or short hair? quite long, down to my boobs
67. Can you name all 50 states of America? I always forget three or four, usually Michigan or Delaware or something like that
68. Favorite school subject? english
69. Extrovert or Introvert? extrovert
70. Have you ever been scuba diving? nope
71. What makes you nervous? life?
72. Are you scared of the dark? a little
73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? yes i’m a grammar nazi, read above
74. Are you ticklish? only my feet lol
75. Have you ever started a rumor? Nope
76. Have you ever been out of your home country? yes
77. Have you ever drank underage? I was 17 when I got drunk for the first time, it was not fun
78. Have you ever done drugs? nope
79. What do you fantasize about? being able to buy all the books in the world?
80. How many piercings do you have? one in each ear and the navel
81. Can you roll your R’s? I’m a native Russian speaker, naturally I can
82. How fast can you type? so I just did a test, got 95 words per minute, and that was me quite relaxed, so I guess pretty quick? Perks of being a law student, typing my way through life really
83. How fast can you run? i can run fast, but not for long
84. What color is your hair? light brown
85. What color are your eyes? mix of blue and green, it’s a rare but real thing, google it
86. What are you allergic to? not allergic to anything
87. Do you keep a journal? yes but I write in it once a month, if that
88. Are you depressed about anything? exams, but that’s it
89. Do you like your age? I preferred 18/19
90. What makes you angry? injustice, even the smallest kind of injustice has me fuming
91. Do you like your own name? yep
92. Did you ever get a foreign object up your nose? maybe like water when I dive or something, I don’t know
93. Do you want a boy or a girl for a child? a boy and a girl because I want two :)
94. What talents do you have? I have weirdly good memory for details, helps me remember quotes easily
95. Sun or moon? sun
96. How did you get your name? my mother’s a history nerd, and she wanted to name me after a Russian Empress, so my full name in Russian would be Yekaterina. I’m Ukrainian, so it changes to Kateryna.
97. Are you religious? catholic, read above
98. Have you ever been to a therapist? nope
99. Color of your bedspread? mint green
100. Color of your room? light blue
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[created by: vyvyan86]
If you got a month free from work/school, where would you go on holiday?
It’s not that I don’t have the time to take a trip like that considering I don’t have a job and I finished school almost 6 years ago, it’s that I don’t have the financial means to do so. I wouldn’t take a trip like that right now anyway of course since we’re still very much in a pandemic and I don’t feel safe or comfortable traveling. I wish I could do something like that, though. That would be amazing.
^Who would you take with you?
My family.
What is your definition of "family"?
Of course there’s the definition of family as people who are related to each other, but you can consider non-related people family as well. A family is a unit. It’s about love, it’s people who have your back, who have your best interest at heart, would do just about anything for you and you do all that for them as well. You can count on each other. There’s loyalty and trust. It’s just a special bond and closeness.
What's the best thing about summer?
The only thing I like is when I’m able to go to the beach or take a vacation, otherwise I despise summer.
Do you have a touch screen phone?
Yes.
If so, what kind? If not, what kind would you like, if any at all?
I have the iPhone 12 Pro Max.
If you have a phone or other device that supports them, what's your favorite application?
Kindle, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat.
Do you enjoy erotic stories? If so, do you read them or write them?
I’m a murder mystery and psychological thriller type of gal.
Have you ever played pinball?
Nope.
If so, what's your favorite machine?
If you had to choose, which one would you rather have; a pet or a baby?
Uh, most definitely a pet. I do not want a baby.
^Why did you choose the one you chose?
I don’t want to have children, but I’m certainly not in the place for that in my life right now.
What's the farthest you've ever travelled to?
Just to Georgia from California.
What year were you born in?
1989.
Do you live with your parents or on your own/with a partner?
I live with my parents.
What's the car of your dreams?
I don’t have one.
What kind is the house of your dreams?
My dream house would be near the beach.
If you could live absolutely anywhere, where would you live?
I’m not sure. I see myself staying in California all my life, but who knows. I definitely want to move to another city, though.
Have you ever witnessed something or someone die?
Yes.
Do you like it when it's bright or prefer a bit darker lighting?
I don’t like bright lighting.
Has anyone ever told you that you snore or talk in your sleep?
I’ve been told I talked in my sleep before, but I don’t think it’s a regular thing I do. I guess I wouldn’t know, though, since I sleep alone.
Do you have any houseplants?
Nope.
Have you ever wanted or do you have a garden that you tend?
Nope to both. Gardening isn’t something I have any interest in.
Are you more on a laptop or a desktop computer?
I only have a laptop, so.
^Do you sit on a chair or lie down when you use the computer?
Majority of the time I’m sitting on my bed while on it.
Do you like shopping or do you just enjoy looking at things in stores?
I do like shopping. There’s times where I may just want to look around at a store, but usually I go with at least the possibility of buying something.
Do you ever look through a catalog and point out what you'd like to have?
I haven’t done that since I was a kid when making my Christmas list or getting books from the Scholastic book catalog.
^Or do you just go ahead and order the things you want?
I mean, I browse online or think of stuff I’ve seen at the store.
Do you ever shop online? If so, what do you usually buy?
I do a ton of online shopping, especially these past few years. I buy stuff from Boxlunch, Hot Topic, Etsy, Amazon, and Bath & Body Works most often, but various other places as well.
Is your computer by a window?
No.
Do you ever spend your time writing stories?
I did when I was like 12 or 13. I loved writing short stories. Every now and then I get the urge to start up again, but I don’t have the ideas, energy, or motivation.
Are you in a book club?
I participate in Bible studies where in addition to reading the Bible, we read another book relating to the topic of the study as well.
Do you like traveling?
Yeah. I wish I could do more of it.
If you could do absolutely anything, what would you like to do the most?
Get my shit together.
What is your ideal job?
I don’t know.
Which would you rather have; a career or several children?
A career.
Do you care what other people think of you?
During the past few years I’ve started to care a lot less. I wish I could say it was because I gained confidence and had better self-esteem, but nope.
If so, why?
--
If you had to take a picture of something you think is beautiful, what would it be?
Of the ocean or some other scenic view.
What is your definition of "beauty"?
Things you find aesthetically pleasing and appealing is one, but it goes a lot deeper and beyond than that.
How vast education do you have?
I have my BA in psych.
Do you think your parents raised you well?
I believe so.
Is your life good right now? Or could it be better?
There’s so much that I wish was different.
Do you consider yourself to be popular? Does it even matter?
No, I’ve never been popular and that’s perfectly fine with me. Especially not now considering I don’t have any friends.
Is the message of a song more important than the melody?
I can just enjoy a song even if the lyrics aren’t especially great cause it has a catchy beat or something, but the best is when it does have nice and relatable lyrics. I love when lyrics can describe or say how I’m feeling or what I’m thinking so perfectly and better than I could. Those songs that just really speak to you, ya know?
Do you know anyone with a mental illness? If so, what is it they have?
Yeah, including myself. I know people with various mental illnesses.
What is your opinion on people, who constantly swear?
I find it kind of unnecessary and sometimes for me it can be too much, but whatever.
What about people, who get drunk once a week?
I don’t care, just be safe and responsible about it. Otherwise, that’s your business.
Which accent/dialect sounds perfect to you?
British accents.
Which accent/dialect sounds horrible to you?
I wouldn’t say any sound horrible.
Which language sounds perfect to you?
Italian.
Which language sounds horrible to you?
None.
If you could have anything to eat right now, what would you want?
I’m going to make my nightly bowl of ramen soon.
If you could have anything to drink now, what would you want?
I’m drinking my usual Starbucks Doubleshot energy drink. Shocker, I know.
If you have siblings, have you ever wished you were an only child?
Nooo.
If you're an only child, have you ever wished you had siblings?
--
Are you religious? If so, how do you follow your religion?
Yes.
If you're an atheist/agnostic, what made you realize this?
--
Do you have a Facebook?
I do.
^If so, do you accept everyone's friend request or only people's you know?
I only accept people I know.
If you have a Facebook, approximately how many friends do you have there?
I think like 130 or something like that.
Do you know any of your neighbors?
Nope.
Does/did any of your relatives have an interesting, nowadays unusual job?
No.
What's your favorite video game?
Mario Bro games and Animal Crossing.
Do you have a favorite gaming platform?
I have an Nintendo Switch.
Have you met your ideal partner yet?
I did with Ty, but that didn’t work out.
^If not, what are some qualities you look for in one?
Someone patient, understanding, caring, easy to talk to, trustworthy, good sense of humor... stuff like that. Someone with some common interests and that I connect with.
Have you had a serious relationship yet? If so, how many?
No.
^How long did they last?
--
^If you've had failed relationships, did you learn anything from them?
I want to just be upfront and know their intentions before getting too deep and going too long without knowing. I don’t want to play anymore games.
^If so, what?
^^^
Are you scared of bees and wasps?
Yes.
What about other insects?
Yes. All of them.
What about spiders?
YES.
Do you get zits often? If so, what do you think causes them?
Not really. I’ll have one or two pop up on my chin now and then and I’m sure that’s because I touch my face a lot.
Do you consider yourself an adult?
I’m 31 so I’m technically an adult, but it could be up for debate.
How would you define the word "adult"?
Man, all these definitions.
What is your definition of happiness?
Sigh.
List a few things that make you happy.
My doggo, coffee, enjoying good food, good books, good TV shows and movies, going to the beach, nice vacations, good things happening for my loved ones, buying gifts for my loved ones.
Do you enjoy books, magazines or comic books the most?
I only read books. I haven’t read a magazine in several years and I’m not a comic book reader.
Do you think people are overly sensitive about things these days?
Admittedly, there have been times where I kind of thought so.
How would you describe your sense of humor?
I don’t know how to describe it. I mean, I like puns and corny stuff, but otherwise I don’t know how to describe it. Stuff will just strike me as funny. It’s weird cause a lot of the times when people show me or tell me something they think is funny I don’t particularly find all that funny, I just kinda chuckle or blow air out my nose. But then stuff I find funny others might not. So yeah, I don’t know.
Do you like spending time with your pets, if you have any?
Yes. <3
Are your parents old-fashioned or up-to-date about certain things?
My parents are up to date on things, especially my mom.
Which job would you never in a million years do?
Anything in the medical field.
What do you think is the most adorable thing in the whole world?
My doggo. (:
What's the most horrible thing in the whole world?
Rapists, pedophiles, murderers who aren’t killing out of self-defense, phobics... <<<
Do you or did you at some point keep a diary?
I had actual diaries when I was in middle school and some of high school, but then I started using Xanga and LiveJournal. This is my diary now.
Do you know any of the people on your Bzoink friends list?
I don’t use Bzoink.
Are you really open about yourself?
In surveys I am.
How personal does a question have to be, so you won't answer it?
It’s more if I feel comfortable or not discussing a certain topic.
Is there a café you go to regularly and the staff knows your "usual"?
Probably if I went myself they would, but I’m very rarely the one who goes to get my coffee and even when I do it’s just through the drive-thru as the passenger.
Have you ever been to Finland?
No.
If so, what did you think of it?
If not, would you like to?
Absolutely.
What's something you've always wanted to do, but haven't had a chance yet?
There’s so many places I’d like to visit.
There, we've come to the end of the survey. Did you like it?
Yeah, overall I did.
If not, what's wrong with it?
I could have done without the definitions.
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Kingdom rules
a thing I did with my friend @ask-shadowsinner
we wrote this for a whole hour just because ;w; I need more ask in my box I'm bored
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nO pOoPiNG oN SidEwAlk
Don’t disrespect the king or wifi privileges are lost for a very long time.
Remember,stop,drop,and pop it(Any incidents of locking before popping isn’t covered by the kingdom’s medical insurance.)
Don’t feed Phil,he’s a bastard.(he spat on Rodimus)
Don’t touch my sweet tarts candies (results in death)
Wash your hand after you take a poop don’t argue just do it.(ya nasty)
Don’t touch the King’s cheetos it’ll result with 100 years dungeon.(Aka ya never gonna be free so don’t it’s rude)
No you may not pet the king’s cat’s,or dog.(back off)
NO YOU MAY NOT EVER TOUCH THE CROWN.(Starscream fuck off)
If you have cake you Must share with the king or you're never aloud to have cake again because sharing is caring and if you don’t share with the king you don’t care for the king which is treason
To join the royal guard you must be the mightiest of mighty table flippers in the whole kingdom.
NO MAKING SHORT JOKES AT THE KING YOU WILL GET KICKED IN THE KNEE IF THE KING CAN REACH!(I used to make short jokes until I got a arrow to the knee)
Remember kiddo’s quit school,do drugs, brush your vegetable, eat your teeth ,make your veggies,eat your bed.
If the king’s pets walk up to you pet them,BUT only if they go to you >->
Don’t challenge the king for dominance,they will win no matter what (sorry we don’t make the rules wait we did dabs)
If the king i caught having unhealthy snacks after 12am spray them with spray bottle full of water.
dON’T TOUCH THE PROWL ACTION FIGURE THE KILL WILL HAVE YOU BEHEADED!
We ride at dawn for no reason just because it sounds cool(Only the king is allowed to sleep in)
WE RIDE TOGETHER WE EAT FRENCH FRIES TOGETHER-vanoss
Never eat soggy waffles.
Only the king has a right to make fun of there own outfits,bullying is not tolerated you will be kicked out the kingdom.(Then you have to live with the other asshats)
No making raisin cookies..ever
If you ask for a hug the king won’t let go you belong to them now.(beware tall people the king will climb you like a vine)
You must dance like old men at all dances just because it’s funny.
The king can get clingy very easily.
If your name is bob and you have bleach blonde hair leave your not aloud to party ever.
Don’t make the king cry you will have to suffer. (The kings sensitive.)
If you share candy with the king, you are now friends good job
The kings like a cat expect a shit ton of mood changes.
Yes,you are allowed to ask the king for art request just no complicated ocs the kings lazy.
Don’t touch the lead knight.
The lead knight collects your daily tax (Tax is probably a cat)
No asking asking for refunds from the king that cats the kings now,you can’t have it back.
If you pay the king in a litter of kittens the king will take every single kitten doesn’t matter.
NO bullying it’s wrong(We have our ways so just don’t do it)
No FIGHTING OVER SHIT I
f put on trial good luck getting justice (we have camera’s)
Murder is only allowed if the king says so.
Don’t touch the things in the castle (talking about you starscream get your greedy digits off the kings shit.The knights have their eyes on you.)
Don't leave your hats unattended someone may sit on them and then they'll be kicked out of the kingdom. You have been warned. Thank you -The asshat police
Number one rule about the kingdom no one talks about the kingdom. The king likes Large sweaters get them one,in return the king will give you
monies.
The king is scared of overlord,don’t prank them with overlord. Ever.
Seriously don’t poop on the fucking sidewalk that shits nasty no one wants to step in that.
The kings allergic of wasp/bee/hornet/etc stings
Don’t shout at the king in result they will cry.
dON’T TALK BadlY At THe KinG THEre New
The king won’t raise there voice and doesn’t ever want to. If they do Run,there on there way to kill you.
HEAD PATS THEY LOVE HEAD PATS(as do I but ignore me)
The kings a flirt,this is a warning.
Starscream isn’t aloud in the castle ever
The ‘dragon’ is actually a German Shepard wearing a t-rex halloween costume
Only tailgate is allowed to wear the king's crown.
Rodimus isn’t aloud in the king’s bedroom,he touches things.
Only Drift can make short jokes because he’s hot.
Don’t sit on the King’s throne(Glares at Starscream)
Starscream must be put on a leash if in castle If Starscream touched something spray him with water and put him in the doghouse for a week. Then burn the touched item.(Starscream germs don’t come off)
If crosshairs the kitten breaks something pet him and say good job.
Tailgate has his own special room in castle along with lead knight
The castle of full of cats and doggo’s be careful
When the king is napping don’t wake them they become mean and grumpy like ratchet.
Ratchet is allowed to make fun of others
No PDA the king doesn’t have a queen because prowl rejected them.
King is still trying to get prowl to say yes
Prowl doesn’t want blue(Does he want yellow?)
Lemme smash prowl
Swiggity swooty
Prowl doesn’t want yellow
blue and yellow?
no.
The kings 5ever alone looking for a queen
sad music plays through the castle
Prowl would rather work than love </3
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feel free to ignore this i just wanted to vent something and this is the only social media acct i have that i’m safe to do so ‘cause my dad doesn’t have a tumblr
i am so goddamn tired of my dad belittling/mocking/criticizing my mom, like it seriously grates on me so damn much
she had a speech difficulty when she was a kid and had to take lessons for it; for that and likely other reasons too, she tends to have pauses in her speech (like i do sometimes)
this asshole does the whole ‘hurry-up’ gesture every fucking time or is like ‘get to the point’/’yeah? and?? c’mon’ and shit like that
if she doesn’t know one particular specific answer about something - recently, it was taxes stuff - he gets all snippy and critical
on a related note he also gets irritated for what he calls ‘having to play 20 questions’ about something.....a.k.a. she didn’t somehow immediately know what information he was after, or didn’t give some kinda complete report as if he’s still a fucking project manager ugh
he doesn’t let her tell stories, he just wants like bare-bones facts and it just.....really seems a lot of times like he doesn’t value what she has to say about stuff
she brought up that, on the trip to california we’ll be going on later this month, she won’t be able to keep up with him walking around parks and stuff (for reference, he’s around 5 ft 10 inches and she’s around 5 ft even) (i can’t keep up w/ him either, as i’m only barely 5 ft 3 inches)
he.........gets mad/frustrated at her. for not being able to keep up. never mind their height difference, or her shorter stride - to this fuckwipe that’s all “excuses”. he literally said that she must be going slow on purpose. he tried to say that ‘oh you go even slower when i try to keep pace with you’, never mind the fact that that’s just her normal goddamn walking speed, and the one he typically sees her use is basically a power-walk.
this fucking shitheel literally criticized someone 10 inches shorter than him for not being able to keep up, and called the point of their stride/height differences an excuse.
(oh and he’s never said it so explicitly before, but he has consistently, for as long as i can fucking remember, mocked her or made a show of waiting for her. for at least as long as i have been fucking alive.
little wonder why we’d most often go out and do stuff when he was out of town (before he retired)
and i just
goddammit i feel like i might cry just typing this because it makes me so damn frustrated to see this shit happening on the regular
and like, i try to redirect or cut in when i can, but it never feels like enough because i want to say more, i want to tell him it’s not okay and how hurtful it is
but i’m also fucking scared of saying it because i don’t have a job or any kind of income and have no way of moving out of this damn house anytime soon, and i’m scared he’d do what he’s already done w/ my brother - threaten to throw me out and/or change the locks
i hate it
i hate him
and i hate even more that it’s not always like this, that there are good moments and fun moments and moments of thoughtful discussion, enough that a part of me feels guilty even venting about this or thinking those things i wrote because ‘i don’t have it that bad’
but when i think that, i remember that threat he gave my brother
i remember when he’d ‘spank’ us with a belt
i remember when i was 6 and he pulled me into the bathroom by my hair and poured liquid soap in my mouth because i said ‘damn’ when i scraped my knee on the driveway (i had to patch up my knee on my own)
i remember all those times he mocked me and treated me like an idiot when i had difficulty with sciences and math
i remember all the times he has mocked my phobias (of dogs, of bees/wasps, and of being physically ill), apparently refusing to understand that they are irrational fears and cannot be overcome with simple fucking reasoning
i remember the other times he’s disparaged my brother for not faring well in the school system/dropping out of college
[addition] i remember that my instinctive reaction when i was 7 years old to being warned by a friend that my dad would be called to pick me up from their house (me and another friend had gotten a bit rowdy) was to flee to the other side of the house and hide in a corner
i remember all the times he’s called me and my brother all sorts of insults for not being able to find jobs/not devoting our every fucking waking moment to jobsearching because we dare to have goddamn social lives
i remember the times he’s mocked me/my brother/my mom for having in-depth discussions about pieces of media we like (the old ‘it’s just a book/movie/show/etc’ ugh)
i remember when he said to my brother’s face that he (my dad) wishes he could “fix” his (my brother’s) brain - again simply because of not completing college
and i remember the way he treats my mom (as mentioned earlier)
and i know i at least have the certainty that i’m not making it all up.
sorry, this post’s purpose kinda changed halfway through, but god i really needed it off my chest somewhere i wasn’t just recounting stuff we already know about to my brother
...
if you made it through this entire textwall, you’re awesome; sorry for possibly souring your day, and i hope something good happens to you all soon <3
#personal shit#mention of abusive actions#lots of swearing#because i am fucking pissed off and exhausted#recognizing all the shit he's done has fueled me these past few years to take serious effort#to show my mom patience and understanding - partly 'cause she fuckin' needs it from somewhere at home#honestly i don't even know how i'd feel if/when that bastard kicks it#but i'd rather not think about that at the moment i'm gonna go watch some youtube
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