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#being on here honestly so i'm trying to get back to it and be okay with posting again and i'm going to make a promise to myself to actually
wren-kitchens · 3 days
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so shiver, but shiver with a friend
1034 words
the boat is creaking. that's not even remotely abnormal; the boat spends more time creaking than it does staying silent—gem built it so it would do that. sure, it took a lil' getting used to, but it didn’t take long for the rhythmic rocking and gentle creaking to become conducive to sleep, and now gem finds it far more difficult to sleep in silence. after all, silence means something is wrong—the engine rumbles if it's working, the waves splash against the sides of the boat if it's still afloat. a creaky boat means gem is still alive, and the boat is still running. but this isn’t your average ambient creaking. like she said, gem knows the noises of her little fishing boat like the back of her hand, and this is not a normal creak. this is a suspicious creak. and- sure, that might sound silly, but have you memorised every sound this boat can make? didn’t think so. 
this fic exists for two reasons, which are stiff stiffyck's love for qpr elven duo (gem and scar) and also me overthinking scar's wheelchair worldbuilding in the hermitcraft world
this could be a lot better but alas I have been consumed by depression writers block, so honestly i'm just proud this ended up as a finished fic
btw this is one of my first times writing wheelchairs, and whilst it is fantasy so things are gonna be a little different, I would appreciate if someone could tell me if I did something wrong/insensitively!
the boat is creaking.
that's not even remotely abnormal; the boat spends more time creaking than it does staying silent—gem built it so it would do that. sure, it took a lil' getting used to, but it didn’t take long for the rhythmic rocking and gentle creaking to become conducive to sleep, and now gem finds it far more difficult to sleep in silence. after all, silence means something is wrong—the engine rumbles if it's working, the waves splash against the sides of the boat if it's still afloat. a creaky boat means gem is still alive, and the boat is still running.
but this isn’t your average ambient creaking. like she said, gem knows the noises of her little fishing boat like the back of her hand, and this is not a normal creak. this is a suspicious creak. and- sure, that might sound silly, but have you memorised every sound this boat can make? didn’t think so.
anyway, all of this to say that gem is pretty sure someone is on her boat at the middle of the night for what she deeply hopes are not nefarious reasons. although, she cannot think of any reason someone would be sneaking onto her boat at two in the morning—nefarious or otherwise. maybe it's grian trying to lag some things out of her chests? but why on earth he wouldn't do that in the day when she wasn't on board, gem has no clue.
there's a new noise now, one that suggests against the idea of nefarious deeds, but only confuses gem more: a kind of squeaking, like a rubber ring being taken off, or an air mattress being slept on. okay, that doesn’t rule anything out at all, and only serves to make everything far more complicated. who is bringing a rubber something onto her boat at 2am? what is happening here?
overtaken by an amounting curiosity to whatever the hell is actually going on, gem climbs out of bed and pads softly along the floorboards in her slippers to her door. she regrets not installing one of those peepholes, because now she actually has to engage with the something that's happening outside in order to investigate. gem is sure there isn’t anything especially dangerous that could be going on, but she pulls out her sword preemptively as she opens the door slowly to find-
to find..
well, she's not sure what she's found.
"gem!" says a cheery scar, who is. on her boat? how is he on her boat- he uses a wheelchair, and the boat is in the middle of the river.
except- no, hang on, his wheelchair seems to be completely lacking wheels, which gem would argue is the main point of a wheelchair. where the wheels should otherwise be, there are floatation devices—seemingly rubber, which explains the noises gem was hearing earlier—in patented hotguy colours, so she assumes that's intentional. okay, that's- that sure is something.
"you-" gem scrambles for any words to express how bizarre this situation is and fails miserably. "you’re on my boat." is all she manages. void, it is way too late (early?) to be trying to figure this out.
"I am on your boat!" scar says, looking rather proud of himself. it's kind of sweet, to be fair—even as it only adds to the crazy situation. "y’know, I didn't think i’d actually manage it. last time I tried, I sunk."
gem blinks, giving up on making sense of the situation now and letting herself just go with the bizarre. "yeah, I can imagine why scar." she gestures at the rubber wheels (they look a bit like wheels, anyway). "how did you get those?"
"cub helped me!" scar smiles, as if this was a normal conversation to be having. does he even realise how strange this situation is, or is this just normal for him now? "see- you know how my chair has an elytra mode?"
"uh huh."
"well, now it has a swimming mode!" scar says, and he clicks a button on the underside of the seat. within an instant, the floatation devices deflate, replaced swiftly by the regular wheels. "ta da!"
"that- I mean, that's very cool." gem says, and she means it, despite how unenthusiastic she knows she must sound. in her defence, it is the middle of the night. "I just- why are you here?"
something changes in scar's expression immediately, and gem panics a little until scar says meekly, "it- okay, well. now it sounds silly."
gem snorts. "because showing off your inflatable wheelchair at two in the morning is normal?" she tilts her head, and her voice is fond when she says, "you know you can tell me anything, right?"
a smile tugs at the corners of scar's lips, and gem feels something warm in her chest to see it. "I know, I know." he hesitates for a second, before giving a huff of exasperation. "I wanted a hug." scar admits, glancing at the floor.
"wh- scar." gem finds herself beginning to smile. "do you really think I would ever turn down a hug from you?"
scars grin is almost shy as he opens his arms, and gem practically falls into them, burying her face in his jacket. man, she has missed hugs from scar; she loves the way they fit together so well, like pieces of a puzzle, perfectly matched to one another. there are very few places where gem feels entirely at home—she's been pretty much everywhere, so she knows what home feels like—and scar is closer to home than any place has ever felt to her.
before she knows it, scar has scooted forward just enough to unbalance her, and she lands on top of him. gem scoffs playfully as scar laughs to himself, holding her closer.
"I can't hug you properly if you’re stood up, y’know." scar mumbles into her hair.
gem rolls her eyes, fond as anything. "well, i’m not complaining." she's quiet for a moment, letting herself appreciate the moment—breathing it all in. "I love you." gem murmurs.
scar squeezes her, and gem can almost hear his smile when he says, "I love you too."
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mikobeautifulheart · 3 days
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Hey I liked that fic you did on pervy megumi ❤ could you do it with yuji but make it a little sweeter ❤❤ty
Ahh I'm sorry this took so long because for the first time in history this is slightly more edited. I tried sweeter but honestly at this point I think i'm incapable of affection. I tried *sigh* sorry bout that.
Pervy Yuji (thoughts)
TW: pervert. Obsessed (Mildly) Some weird non consented touches but not smut. (or spicy sorry guys.)
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No surprise that Yuji just can't get enough of you.
Every moment, ever opportunity, he takes it.
Y/N wanna train together? Y/N wanna study together?
Y/N Gojo sensei is making us pick partners for the sister school even, wanna be mine?
Its not just being together but also distance.
The fact that every training session ends a little too close together.
"Yuji your squishing me." You muffled trapped under Yuji's body...again.
"Ah sorry Y/N! I lost my footing there and couldn't keep my balance."
Out of training to.
"Sorry Y/n the train is getting a little crowded" he said trying to hide his face in his collar.
"Its not your fault Yuji"
Every bump of the train you felt his hand on places you usually would hit someone's hand away from... Good thing he looked so innocent or you wouldn't have brushed it off so easily.
But every time you brushed it off. Yuji is just trying his best you know? He's Sukuna's vessel and never even knew about curses until now, you had to cut him some slack.
Even if it had nothing to do with the Jujutsu world.
"Hey Yuji, did you happen to get my laundry by accident? I can't find it anywhere and Megumi said you were there last."
"Oh uh I can check but if it's not here do you need help looking?"
"Uh- thanks but no, its just some...it would be embarrassing I guess. You know what never mind I probably just misplaced it again sorry." You sigh and walk out the room.
It happens more often then you liked. Some clothes of yours would go missing and then you would find them where you last left them or in a basket near the laundry.
If only you checked his lower dresser draw filed with some of you clothes.
When they lose their scent they get put back and so the cycle continues.
"Your sick. And that's coming from me. The king of curses, I kill and eat people and i'm telling you your sick ha." Sukuna chuckled in his head.
"Shut up. Like you would understand." Yuji said climbing down from a tree across from your window.
THANK YOU FOR READING ♡
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AUTHOURS NOTE: Omg I wrote this so long ago but it didn't save. But it's okay because I re-wrote it and it's way better now. Trust me (even tho the ending sucks a bit). Anyways have a good whatever time of day.
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What are your thoughts on fuck boy besties Felix & Jisung with fem!reader?
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When I think of fuck bois Felix and Jisung… I picture them like in the following TikTok’s…
Here and Here
… fun, flirty, persuasive, attractive. It honestly stirs up my inner 18 year old when I’d go out to clubs.
↠↠↠ a/n: I've written this deliberately where the dialogue can be mostly interchangeable between the two. I'm kind of going with the half drunk feeling of being hit on and swept away in a puddle of pure lust.
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You see them every weekend at the club. They set their sights on a someone. They flirt with them, dance with them, make them laugh and feel special. They whisper in their ear and breathe along their neck. Then they leave with them. Every. Single. Week.
This week, they have their sights set on you.
“We see you here every week. What’s your name?”
“Oh you’re 24! You look 18.”
You hate what it’s doing to your insides. You hate how hard you’re blushing.
“Let us buy you a drink.”
"This is our special girl, y/n. Make sure you take care of her." They tell the bartender.
"You'll come dance with us, won't you, baby?”
Somehow you end up on the dance floor, Jisung dancing awfully close to your chest, Felix slipping behind you.
"You’re okay with us grinding against you, right?" Jisung steps closer, whispering against your ear. “Let us dance with you.” He says lustfully as he presses his hips to yours. Felix presses into from behind.
You feel both their hardening cocks pushing against you.
“Feel what you do to us, love.” Felix says in your ear as he runs his hands down your sides.
"You’re so pretty. I really need to know what your lips feel like."
“Come home with us, let us make you feel good, yeah?”
“We don’t bite. Well not too hard.”
You end up sandwiched between them in the back of the cab.
"I really need to know what your pussy feels like."
"Let us touch it, y/n. I bet your pussy is wet. Can we feel? Pretty please?"
They slide their hands up your skirt and finger fuck you right there on the backseat, while they kiss you like they will lose their minds if they don’t get to touch you.
You’re so wet for them. These two sweet, deadly, charismatic, horny, men. You feel like the only girl in the world. They do this every week. You’ll get to feel them in inside you soon. They've been inside the whole club-full of people.
"I'm so hard for you right now. Feel it."
“Me too, baby. Here. Touch it. You do this to us.”
"We've gotta have you."
You palm them over their pants while they stretch your open your pussy.
“So wet for us.”
“So tight.”
"That's a good girl... letting us play with you like this."
They lay you on one of their beds and your clothes disappear.
"Your pussy tastes so good. Your dripping. Taste her."
They swap while the other sucks your nipple.
You realise Felix is eating you out, as Jisung straddles your chest. "Baby, can you take care of me? I need your pretty mouth around my cock. That's it. Let me fuck your mouth."
"I think your beautiful pussy needs to come on a cock. Let me help you with that...perfect. So tight."
They get you in variety positions, taking turns in your sopping cunt. Covering you in their cum. Pulling orgasms from you like it's their full time job.
They've got you floating. buzzing, pliable, compliant. They know exactly what to say to have you swooning and sobbing "yes, please...do anything you want."
They give each other a knowing look.
"Anything we want?"
"Yes, anything."
"Can we try fucking you at the same time?"
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@channieandhisgoonsquad @noellllslut @itsseohannbin @weareapackofstrays @kangnina @3rachasdomesticbanana @palindrome969 @xxkissesforchanniexx @chuuchuu1224 @fun-fanfics @wolfennracha
@3rachasdomesticbanana
@palindrome969
@xxkissesforchanniexx
@chuuchuu1224
@fun-fanfics
@wolfennracha
Sorry if you’re tagged twice… my end indicates my original tag of you didn’t work properly.
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jimraisedmeup · 1 day
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TICK // 11.1 - against all odds
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Rating: mature (angst, language)
Word Count: 1500
How can I just let you walk away? Just let you leave without a trace When I stand here taking every breath, with you You're the only one who really knew me at all
February 14, 1984 - junior year
"Your room smells nice."
"Did you expect it to smell bad? Jesus."
Eddie stared at you, standing in his bedroom. You were looking around, your piercing gaze taking in every little detail, which suddenly made Eddie self-conscious.
"Do you have, like, multiple personalities or something, Buckley? I'm getting whiplash from your mood swings," he muttered, dropping the keys to his van on the dresser.
You scoffed, removing your jacket and scarf before laying them out on his bed. You sat on your jacket like it was some kind of protective barrier between yourself and his bedsheets. 
The strange action made Eddie roll his eyes.
Taking time to look at you, Eddie was sure now that you were going through some shit. Your hair was still pristine as always, but the bags under your eyes made you look like a goddamn ghoul.
"Hot chocolate?" you reminded him, running your hands over the tops of your thighs.
Eddie shifted awkwardly. "Uh, yeah, about that. I don't have any hot chocolate, I just said that to lure you in here."
"Again with the homicidal implications, huh, Munson?"
"I do love implications, sunshine," he snapped back with a quick wink. "Woah, woah!"
Standing up suddenly, you grabbed your jacket and made for the door. On your way out, you stopped in front of Eddie.
"Stop calling me sunshine. I don’t like pet names. I’m not your pet," you spat.
Ignoring the jab at his bruised heart, Eddie sneered at you, second-guessing why he even bothered to bring you there to talk. 
"At this point, I think the only thing I know about you is that you're a total asshole."
You paused in the hallway outside of his bedroom. You seemed defeated, like a car that ran out of gas, like a bird giving up after trying to fly with a broken wing.
"Look, I can tell you're not having a great time lately. Obviously," he said, gesturing towards you as a whole, "you're a little off your rocker."
When you didn't respond, Eddie continued. "Let me help you get back on your rocker. Talk to me, tell me things, anything. Tell me about your shitty parents, tell me about your dirty dreams. I care, you know. I'm not about to judge you."
He worried that his pleading would chase you out the door faster, which honestly could be the last straw for Eddie. There was a fine line between trying to help the girl who was hell bent on pushing everyone away and maintaining his own self-respect.
And then you nearly crumpled to the floor, rubbing your eyes with your fingertips.
"I'm sorry, Eddie. I'm sorry about ghosting you again, for leaving after what happened on New Years."
He hadn't expected an apology from you. Sure, he wanted one - but he sure as hell didn’t expect one. 
And then the very last thing he expected from you was the amount of emotion on your face. A mixture of confusion, exhaustion, just a sprinkle of anger.
Unsure of what to say, Eddie scooted towards you, taking a knee on the floor near where you leaned against the dingy wall.
"It's… it's okay. I can't be mad at you. We're both going through our own shit."
"That's no excuse for me to abandon you. Twice."
Eddie chuckled grimly. "Huh, yeah. You did ditch me twice, didn't you?"
"I'm so sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me."
"You mean, besides being a typical teenage girl?" He tried to joke, but immediately felt bad. "Is it about your parents?"
And finally, after months of wondering what the hell you were hiding, the wall you were desperately holding up… fell down.
How can you just walk away from me? When all I can do is watch you leave 'Cos we've shared the laughter and the pain and even shared the tears You're the only one who really knew me at all
You told him about your family. You told him about your religion, or ex-religion at this point, and how much it affected the dynamic of you and your parent's relationship.
You had been so used to maintaining your stoic appearance even before you changed your mind about religion. Since you were a small girl, your parents scolded you for crying. If you even laughed too loudly in public, your mother would pinch your arm. You're embarrassing yourself, child.
Your parent's recent divorce was the talk of housewives all over Hawkins, but not necessarily as big as Eddie's father's arrest. More like the hottest gossip amongst adults since back when Hopper went off the rails and banged nearly every woman in town.
You felt responsible for the entire thing. You told Robin about your father's affair, who in turn told your mother. The whole situation was a complete cluster fuck, ending up with your mother moving to Indianapolis and now the Buckley sisters only had your shitty dad. Not that either of you really needed him, though.
Confiding in Eddie about Robin's sexuality and your parent's ridicule was the hardest part, a lone tear crawling down your cheek for the first time in years. You had never said the words out loud before, even to Robin herself. It had always been an unspoken thing between you two.
You were a girl with a lot of feelings built up inside of you, anger bubbling at the surface of your impassive image. 
After growing up in a vicious, judgemental household, Eddie could see exactly why you were so distrusting of others.
Especially new, unpredictable people. Like himself.
And Eddie sat in silence, sitting across the narrow hallway from you. He absorbed every word you spoke. He felt like he was receiving a precious gift, a priceless artifact, deserving of being protected inside of his heart forever. 
In your close proximity, the Munson boy wrapped his outstretched legs loosely around your own legs. You didn't seem to mind.
"Thank you for telling me. Thank you for telling me about your life, Buckley," he mumbled, after a long stretch of silence between them. 
"Are you okay?"
"What?" he questioned, puzzled. 
"About your dad…"
Your eyes lifted to meet his, and Eddie felt like he saw a new clarity there. Your fixed stare was lucid, like a dirty window that was cleaned after years of neglect. And hell, Eddie would cut off one of his limbs to become the worn out rag that cleaned that window forever.
It seemed like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders. He admired you, not only for overcoming obstacles in life, but as a physical being. Sour conversation aside, Eddie wanted to hold you. He was still afraid you would run away, disappear for a third time.
"Eddie?"
He coughed, distracted, looking down the hallway. "Oh, um, well… my dad got locked up for dealing drugs. Now I live here. Not much to say about that."
"But are you okay?"
Thinking for a moment, he tapped his boot against your hip. "I'll be okay. I was planning to move here anyways, remember? No more drunken screaming fights, no more locking me out of the house on a weekly basis. No more broken guitars, either," he laughed. "I've actually been keeping my favorite guitar here at my uncle's for years because of that old angry bastard."
"Really?"
"Unfortunately, Buckley, you aren't the only one with dysfunctional parents. Hate to break it to you." He had one more question for you. "But, on a more personal note. Did I do something wrong?"
You fidgeted in your seat on the floor. "What do you mean, exactly?"
"I guess I know better by now than to take these last few months too personally. We're human, life has its ups and downs. But are we still friends? Why did our friendship, or whatever the hell it was, become collateral damage in all of this?"
No answer from you.
"Are you going to stick around this time? I'm developing abandonment issues over here," he smirked.
His grin grew wider as you actually smiled back at him. Your eyes seemed to glow at him from across the hallway.
"I don't know, you tell me. Can I stay?"
"I'll keep you forever if you let me."
The blush on your cheeks was displayed to him in an almost shameless way, like an offering. And then your next question would have knocked him off his feet if he hadn't already been seated on the floor.
"No, I mean can I stay here tonight?"
Take a good look at me now, 'cos I'll still be standin' here And you coming back to me is against all odds It's the chance I've gotta take
(song lyrics credit: "Against All Odds (Take a Look at Me Now)" by Phil Collins)
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Helluva Boss Season 2 trailer break down. Pt 3: Ghost Fuckers!
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Ive been so fucking excited for this one since Brandon said it is his favorite episode he's worked on yet!!
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Okay so this might honestly just be me being crazy, but I have to talk about it. Blitzø is giving Taako so hard here. For everyone who has no clue what I'm talking about (which I assume is a lot, I doubt there's much cross over between these fandoms) Taako is a character from The Adventure Zone: Balance, a DnD actual play podcast done by the McElroy family. He is a fan favorite, him and other aspects of the series have been referenced in a lot of other animated shows.
I'm making this connection for a few reasons, most notably is the outfit, which is very reminiscent to the general fanon depiction of Taako, as well as how Blitzø's voice gets really high and sounds almost like Brandon's impression of Taako. All of this might be me reading into something that isn't there, trying to connect two of my favorite pieces of media.
Back to the actual episode:
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A few shots are scattered around the trailer of Blitzø and Millie fighting in two distinct scenes. The first is present day, It looks like Blitzø has been possessed and attacks Millie.
The second I believe is a flashback to when they met. Millie has long hair like we have seen her have in the past, most notably her and Moxxie's wedding photo. Their first encounter i believe is this fight, we will see this as well as some more with them properly meeting, like Blitzø being insanely impressed by how skilled Millie is, and offer her a job at I.M.P.
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I am just now noticing this on my final edits with these posts, I believe the scene where Blitzø crashes the van happens either early in this episode, or in the last two somewhere. because it looks here to be the van but extreamly damaged
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Here we see the owner of the hotel, still unnamed to my knowledge, having the same glowing eyes Blitzø has when he's possessed. I believe that means one of two things. Either here he is also possessed by the same or similar being. Or its him that is who possess Blitzø. I personlly suspect the latter. This episode is clearly going to have a strong Scooby Doo vibe, so the big bad really being the guy that brought them there in the first place makes the most sense.
Again I am sorry for the shit photo quality, and possible bad grammar and spelling. I currently have the posts for the rest of the episodes nearly done so expect those in the next few hours ♡ Id love to hear any other ideas or theories about the upcoming episodes, or anything I missed/got wrong!
Pt. 1: The Full Moon | Pt. 2 :Apology Tour | Pt. 3: Ghostfuckers | Pt. 4: Mastermind | Pt. 5: Sinsmas
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arklay · 1 year
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WIP DAY.
tagged by @girlbosselrond @morvaris @aartyom @risingsh0t @phillipsgraves @leviiackrman @indorilnerevarine & @denerims over the past month! sorry it's taken me so long to get to anything at all, i'm sure you guys have heard me address it enough, but thank you all so much for continuing to tag me in things while i've been inactive ♡
tagging @aelyosos @brujah @calenhads @florbelles @jendoe @lightwardens @liurnia @nokstella @nuclearstorms @shadowsofrose @shellibisshe @steelport @swordcoasts @wrymbloods @voerman & all of those who tagged me again cause i'm so behind + anyone else who'd like to share anything they're working on, not just writing! ♡
i haven't written anything since the last wip game i did, but i started trying to put diana's timeline together at the start of january, so i mean... i'll show that instead. as you can see, fatigue hasn't let me do much with it even though i've got all of her timeline already done and strewn about all over the place.
started with 1995 onwards cause it was originally going to be an ewskers timeline situation, but then wanted to include all of her backstory so i went back to the start and still have the late 80s and early 90s to get through before then, but yeah :]
it's going to include like all little moments i've thought of between the ewskers just for me and placing them on the timeline, so you can imagine how long this is going to get if i have to go to 2021 for village... like just 1996-1998 is going to be so much... she's very special to me if you couldn't tell already lmaoo
never sharing this though, it's just for me, and like will help for when i do her timeline page (more in-depth version of what's on her oc page) to just run through canon events and brief descriptions and whatnot. you understand.
everything is blurred out besides 1995 ewskers momence and the years, just cause like idk her i feel weird sharing her in-depth backstory unless it's in dms or something, just cause there's lots going on there and yeah. things. idk
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i also made a carrd for twt if you wanna have a look at that :] there's some cheeky subtle things with the two resi items i used as pics hehe
actually, you know what, i'll give a lil bit from where i left of with that rewrite anyways, even though it's been months since i wrote it. but why not
Wesker left a fleeting kiss behind her ear then reached around her and hooked his fingers beneath her coat, prompting Diana to glance back at him. But all he did was gently pull it from her shoulders. She watched him from out of the corner of her eye as he hung it up on the rack by the door, his movements careful and almost calculated, until he turned back towards her, and the warmth of his body returned once more. He pressed up against her side this time, as opposed to her back, and one of his hands found a home on her waist. The way the arm it belonged to was resting firmly against her as he began leading her towards the kitchen was comforting, secure, yet unmistakably possessive. And she revelled in it. He had quite the knack for handling her just the way she wanted.
#tag games.#keep going to do picrews and just zoning out 😭 i'm so behind on literally everything but it's fine it's okay (lying)#i'm having a day and a half even though i woke up feeling okay but oh well. my last month has just been like watching videos during the day#or playing games when i have a bit more energy but like i can't do anything that requires me to actually read or write things like words#are just not computing in my brain at the moment but it's okay like i'm just exhausted and hoping soon i can get back to writing because i#still have over 30 wips going lmao but yeah it's been a time a half with lots of appointments and seeing specialists again and trying to#sort things out. i've been more active on twitter which i've mentioned before but it's just because like it's easier for me to sort of just#like and rt things and not having to do my organisation tags and things like i know that sounds so just small and simple but that's how#i've been lately like to my brain rn that seems like a really big task. so i just keep coming on here randomly for a few minutes then#disappearing so i'm sorry that i've definitely missed so much and i haven't been around to just show my appreciation and love to your#creations!! also just everything that happened in december and then a bit at the start of january too like i'm just a lil paranoid about#being on here honestly so i'm trying to get back to it and be okay with posting again and i'm going to make a promise to myself to actually#filter more tags i think? just to help me with like not exposing myself to things that do make me feel uncomfortable in any way!! i'm#rambling now but sorry sometimes i just need to lmaooo idk but yes so cute lil subtle things from my carrd i wanna talk about cause why not#i didn't have to change the blue herb from re0 besides making it brighter because it's already teal toned which is so sexy but i shifted#the hue on the spade key like SLIGHTLY like it was so little. but anyways. i use this emoji ✨ on my twitter name and yes cause sparkles but#also. three stars. the s.t.a.r.s. badge and logo :] then blue herb because i will have no poison in my safe space!!!! take a blue herb or#leave please!! only good vibes and safe space here!! spade key because i'm ace <3 i was going to include the diamond one in there as well#because am demiro and like those are the symbols in the community. ace of spades for ace. diamond for demis (both orientations)#but wasn't sure how to weave the pink through the rest of the carrd even though cyan and pink together is so pretty omg
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filet-o-feelings · 1 year
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I forgot getting into this bed at my parents' house is basically an Olympic sport for someone of my height.
My parents got an alarm so I'm now locked in and can't even open a window. It's hot in here and nice outside and I just want to open a window 😭
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wild-aloof-rebel · 2 years
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Hi Leslie! I read your answer about Billy and now I'm curious why you think the story doesn't work. I enjoyed the show but I was disappointed that the only answers we got were about Royal and Autumn. Do you think that's because they're saving things for another season? Is it just that it doesn't work as one season on its own?
i'm going to start with the end of this ask: yes, i do think that they're intending to save things for possible future seasons, but i don't think that's why this season doesn't work either.
i certainly understand that you have to find balance between revealing the answer to every question and saving things for down the line, as well as between spoon-feeding your audience every single detail about the story and letting them infer some things on their own. the problem is that the show doesn't actually manage to balance any of those things, which means we end up being given a hundred clues about autumn's identity and are clearly expected to somehow still be surprised at that reveal or beaten over the head with the message on the billboard in the last couple episodes, while practically everything else is left unexplored and elliptical to the point of opacity.
ultimately, the biggest problem with all of that for me is the actual structure of the show. i know that there are only eight episodes to work with, so some of the questions you introduce are going to go unanswered in that time, but if the Big Answers you're going to give in this particular season are to the questions of who is autumn and what is royal's mysterious past, then you have to structure the season so that those are the Big Questions that it presents.
instead, at the end of the first episode we're shown autumn pushing royal into the void, and at the end of the second, we get what he sees inside the void and the information that in that future he is dead. because that's the big surprising thing we're left with from that first block of episodes, THAT is the main mystery that the show has then structurally set itself up to explore. why is royal dead? did someone murder him, and if so, who? how far away is that future? etc. brian watkins has also said that that story is one of the central pillars of the show: we were all really intrigued by the idea of a journey that starts with a man that knows he’s going to die and thus must prevent a future that includes that. So that’s been a really wonderful, fun narrative track for us to follow throughout these first eight episodes. It really comes to a head at the end of five with Royal seeing that Autumn and his wife Cecilia are linked in the process of his death.
but the issue with that is that those questions and their answers aren't actually "a fun narrative track for us to follow" in this season. in fact, it's the opposite: it's set up so strongly at the start that it then comes across like a dropped plot line throughout the rest of the show. the only other time we really come back to it is indeed the vision where he sees autumn there with cecilia as he's dying, but we get very little new information from that, just autumn's presence, which isn't exactly surprising by then. and while i guess you could say that the discovery that the geologist is associated with the mining company and royal's attempt to call them only to get a disconnected number are also related, mysteries related to the larger world portrayed in that future are largely tangential at this point. none of the actual questions surrounding royal's death are answered or even partially answered, and mostly it just isn't brought up again.
more importantly though, if, as watkins says, the point is that this is the journey of a man trying to prevent his future death, why are we never actually given that as a motivation for the things that royal is doing? i suppose after he sees that vision, the next bit we see of him is the scene where he picks autumn up on the atv and then kind of loses it on her and goes to burn her tent, and so maybe we're supposed to infer from that that those actions are being done in an attempt to prevent her from killing him? but i wouldn't have even thought to try to make that connection if i hadn't read watkins' interview. because what royal is actually yelling at her in that scene is to stay away from his family. i can see how those things would relate—since cecilia is also there in the vision of his death and i guess maybe he also thinks that if he can't stop his own death he can at least keep her from hurting them as well—but there's nothing about that connection that is made particularly clear. in fact, because he has previously warned her about staying away (long before he sees the vision of her and cecilia), the scene simply reads as him being angry that she hasn't listened to him rather than anything specifically related to preventing his own death.
that's the kind of issue that is prevalent throughout the whole show. the structure emphasizes certain things, by where they're placed in the story or how much time we spend on them, and so often they're dropped or made to feel separate from other things happening on the show. and far too often, the events we're shown aren't explicitly or even logically connected to the characters' motivations throughout the remainder of the story. and some of that is fine. obviously we as an audience should be able to read into some things. obviously you're not going to answer every single question that is raised. obviously characters are allowed to change their minds and to do things that contradict the things that happen to them or our previous impressions of them. but there still has to be enough context and connection in the show itself that we can find a discernible purpose for the things we're being shown—there has to be a reason why—or everything starts to feel meaningless. especially with a run time this short. there is no time for filler in eight episodes. if you're including it, you're automatically telling me it's important. and the more times that you contradict yourself or bring something up only to drop it entirely a few episodes later or don't actually give me some reason that you've chosen to show me this particular thing in this particular way, the more i start to think you don't actually know what you're doing.
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alexwlwesker · 2 years
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My headcanon is that Nicholai was really pissed at Carlos for recruting Jill not because he doubts Jill's ability, but because he knows exactly who she is and is afraid she'll fuck up his traitorous plans and kick his ass
entirely too long further commentary in the tags
#the big thing is that Nicholai knows immediately that Jill is STARS#which Jill doesn't question but isn't that a little weird?#i also think Nicholai was one of the people scoping Jill out#so when he comes back to the station and Carlos has recruited Jill fuckin Valentine his hackles raise#I think 'Why is she here?' isn't just Nicholai being an ass but also him being defensive#because Nicholai knows Jill is definitely smart and badass enough to completely f*ck up his plans if she gets a hint of what he's doing#like Nicholai just walked in to find the one person who could screw this up for him being a part of their team. His heart probably dropped#to the floor. Amazing job Carlos#so him staring her down and belittling her in front of the others is him measuring her up + him hoping it'll chase her off#and I think he was afraid of exactly this happening too. That Valentine would get tangled up with his plot and become an obstacle#and honestly this is all how I just read his expressions in that scene too#i think he's trying to read her face and then he's pissed that he won't be able to get rid of her easily. Not now that she has Carlos on he#side + she's a business opportunity#and beneath all that aggression he's just very agitated and intimidated that Jill's here and his wheels are turning#ALSO#'can't pull the trigger when it counts' is a dumb red herring I think#all Valentine did was not shoot Murphy immediately#she met him for like 5 seconds she didn't even have time to inspect the wound#(okay ALSO also sidenote I'm pretty sure Nicholai actually did not give a shit whether Murphy was infected or not#he was just taking his chance to kill a loose end without it being too suspicious)#so Nicholai making Jill's whole personality 'can't pull the trigger when it counts' is just a bluff and excuse#Nicholai knows Jill's STARS so he knows that she survived Arklay#so anyway 💅#now I don't think Nicholai realized the extent to which Valentine would become a problem to him and underestimated her#but he knew she'd be a problem nonetheless#back then#jill valentine#Nicholai Zinoviev#nicholai ginovaef#nikolai zinoviev
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clericlost · 2 years
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lately i’ve been feeling so much like. cheering clapping applause to be here with y’all but all the enthusiasm is stuck in a snowglobe that i can’t figure out how to break cause it’s made of fear pain agony because social anxiety every time i log on :/
#out.#negative //#it sucks to experience but honestly it sucks more than like. i know people are here to have fun and often write better when#they can actually get along w their writing partner?#and i hate that this Thing is just in the way of me and everyone else but idk how to get rid of it#it's just Paralyzing like i just get stuck and it feels impossible to shake myself out of it#and then i feel anxious about THAT lmao so. wondering if i need to just throw the towel in instead of doing this to my partners jdskfs#like i logically know it's not That big of a deal but i also know it can feel so discouraging to be excited abt smth and not feel it back#but it's not even the feeling it back that's the issue! it's just talking w people idk why my brain just flatlines over it but it's so bad#lately. when i'm in a good headspace i'm the exact same way and LOVE when i can iron down my interactions to ppl i just Enjoy being around#but when i'm in a bad headspace it's so hard to do anything other that hide in ic replies indefinteily#even with people i'm so so comfortable with cause it is very much a state of being that stems from Me not anyone else#idk. i just feel shitty for ghosting but then i feel too shitty to fix it :/#wish i could psychically link w all of you so u could know how happy i am to write with you#idk why it's so hard to translate ooc one on one#idk why it's like there's an actual physical wall in my brain stopping me most of the time#social anxiety fucking sucks i guess lol#yeah....... killing it w my mind#i know it's probably just made worse by my recent caffiene addiction but it'll probably be a while before i can kick that shit so#idk if i should quit while i'm barely ahead or just. try to be okay with ic replies#but i Hate that cause it feels like such bad rp etiquette like. i don't wanna rp like that lol#but idk how else to while i'm like this :/#which probably means i should take a break!! but i selfishly don't wanna lose more writing partners than i already have but then#i guess either way i might lose some people but at least if i took a break it'd feel like less shitty of a reason#ugh......#too much to think about on a sunday afternoon
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scare-ard--sleigh · 2 months
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also saying this is so earnest that it makes me wanna vom but i like,,,, miss being in a fandom where people like my ocs as much as i do wwweehhh
#silver jelly#i'm 90000000% talking about arch*r and honestly i need to just rewatch and get back into it full swing y'all are so supportive and kind <3#like idk i don't want to sound ungrateful for the people who Do like/are interested in my op oc i just...........#okay. i really enjoy hearing about people's ocs i really really honestly do; it is for real one of my favorite things.#i'm a storyteller and i LOVE stories; i would be dead without stories.#and i really enjoy when people infodump about the lore!! but i dooooooo notice when i've asked like a dozen questions about Their Guy and#they haven't said one word to me about mine. and that's happening;;;;;;; kind of a lot with these new op people .#i just feel like theeee world's biggest tool being like 'so what do u think about my guy/this plot thing/etc' idk maybe i'm being silly.#and i should probably noooooooottttt be venting about that Here ashdjbfubh i don't think anyone's trying to be mean or doing it#on purpose i guess i just. i thought there'd be like a;;; click? maybe? putting this into words feels so stupid lmao it's fucking crazy how#much of my ego i put on other people caring about my guy. my therapist is nooooot gonna like that jfmbjgbkgm#anyway !! i might spend some time developing my guy and figure out if there's something else that might give me the feeling i want#i've worked so hard making a story that i think is cool and frankly;;; i deserve attention for it jmbjfgkbmg#maybe there's somewhere else that has better rapport like op is popular there's gotta be some somewhere for ocs .#god don't make me take up rp again i won't fucking do it .#anyway maybe tomorrow i'll watch arch*r and do some research (and think about how funny an op crossover would be <3)
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baekdaedream · 11 months
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So TDS2 never worked out for me at all 😔 let’s hope TDS3 goes much better~ hoping before the end of 2024 to have seen EXO, Dream, and WayV in concert I hope that’s. Not too much to hope for 😣
#personal#okay we know exo planet six is being prepared for at least right? just deciding between seoul and japan for it like#hh waiting for japan feels like waiting a bit long and risking not going ??#I could just try for both but. with how exo'clock was I know the japan concerts will be more fun#also I need cosmic railway live still oh my goodness that and el dorado please :(#need to go to the japan concerts for the hopes of cosmic railway and ahh imagine them doing more from the countdown album too..#okay also cbx back in japan when I miss them#but yes okay wayv's fanmeet tour is still ongoing and apparently not even halfway done even though I thought they were ending it in june?#so we'll see.. maybe after their next full album which is apparently in november we'll get a concert tour from them? please..#hh and tds3 I could have maybe tried going for the additional day but lol the overall cost for that trip would've been like#twice as much as usual for just 1/3 concert days?? if it was 2/3 then yeah sure but wow just 1 I was so done#honestly how tds2 has gone for me which is just completely upsetting and disappointing and saddening and stressful and frustrating#it like almost ruined dream for me but it's okay I decided to not even bother for the added day because I didn't want it ruined#there would have been too much stress and other negative emotions at a great cost so no I'll pass#my japan trip will wait too.. it's fine.. my rose will like the two weeks off with me instead anyway#considering when he was a kitten I was gone for those two weeks for TDS2 which was cancelled and he was so upset..#but yeah ugh 3 days of really good seats cancelled and then what encore just 1/3 days with a maybe somewhat good seat or not like#for a much greater cost than before ?? no#anyways their concerts will only get better from here like honestly wish they could have the same concert director as exo#because exo's concerts are top tier and like. dream could get on that level too I'm sure
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maxtermind · 26 days
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baby, would i still be your lover?
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★ : summary :: when he accidentally insults you during an argument ★ : feat :: max verstappen, lewis hamilton, carlos sainz, charles leclerc, lando norris ★ : genre :: angst ★ : word count :: 2.9k ★ : a/n :: as much as i love making the crack texts, i'm just an angst addict 😔
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Max Verstappen
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Everyone, people who weren’t even in Max’s close proximity, knew that he was impulsive and a little reckless. With you, on the contrary, Max was usually a think first, act later kind of a lover. That wasn’t to say that when arguments happened, they were a pretty sight to look at.
It was a single thing that you said which suddenly turned into a huge blown out argument, leaving your head throbbing as Max continued to vent his frustrations about unrelated issues.
"You're so hot-headed, you can't even have a normal conversation without blowing up."
"Attacking me now, are you?" Max retorted, his tone defensive.
He was quick to bite back and the ball in your throat made it scratch-y to talk. You were sure that your eyes were welling up with tears but he was too far away to see it.
"I'm just stating the truth.” You started after taking a shuddering breath. “Every time we talk, it turns into a fight because you can't control your temper."
"Well, maybe if you didn't push all my buttons, we wouldn't be here."
He was talking in the same decibel at least and for a second you had hope that everything would be better. Then his words registered and the hope vanished as well.
"I'm not the one who flies off the handle at the slightest provocation!"
You had to stop and take another breath, otherwise, you were going to start crying and this conversation was inevitably going to get left in between because Max wasn’t an asshole who was okay with his girlfriend crying just because he was angry.
"You know what? I'm sick of your constant criticism."
"And I'm sick of walking on eggshells around you!"
He took a moment to say the next thing. The silence indicating that he was thinking it over first. Max's next words hung in the air, heavy with implication.
"Fine, maybe we should just call it quits then."
The suggestion hit you like a punch to the gut. Was this really that easy for him? He just ripped your heart out and splashed it on the ground. Your chest hurt so much and he was just sitting there? Was he not at all affected by the way you looked close to crying now?
"Fine. Enjoy being single and available," you retorted, your voice trembling with suppressed emotion.
Your boyfriend rolled his eyes looking over at you, indicating how he didn’t really think that you guys were breaking up. Though in your head, this was the last time you were ever going to look into his eyes again.
"You're too sensitive, always getting upset over nothing."
You were already on the edge, not having even processed that you guys almost- probably did break up over you trying to talk something out with him.
“Us breaking up is nothing to you?”
The weight of his words crashed over you, the tears finally spilling down your cheeks. Max's expression softened, regret flashing in his eyes, but it was too late. The damage had been done, and the fragile bond between you felt irreparably shattered.
Lewis Hamilton
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How can one tell if they really are in a good relationship? Is it the security and sense of peace? Is it the frequent love confessions? Honestly, the explanation might differ person to person but one thing you always believed that made a relationship was being level headed even during arguments when emotions were running high
Needless to say, you were very glad you found solace in Lewis. A person who was prone to recognizing the impact of his words. Arguments between you two were rare, and when they did occur, Lewis prioritized finding solutions rather than escalating the conflict. His ability to remain level-headed during disagreements was a cornerstone of your relationship.
Everyone has those days though, when acting out of character seems more suitable than the usual. Moments when emotions override reason.
You were more worked up than usual. Your insides were burning with this desire to get answers because your boyfriend wasn’t there with you on the day you needed him the most.
You drove back home from your conference, dismayed despite it being a very successful session, given that your proposal got accepted as soon as you were done. You just wished your chocolate eyed man was sitting in the crowd looking at you with his signature proud smile.
After a shower, you sat on your couch to watch some show and just move on from the bittersweet day. It was an hour later, when your boyfriend showed up with a bouquet in his hand. Lewis walked over to you and leaned down to kiss your head.
“Congratulations, love," he greeted, oblivious to the storm brewing within you. “Saw it on the news, sorry I couldn’t join you. Got caught up with work.”
Usually, you would have avoided the argument till you felt like you could understand his side too. That was one of the things that helped you guys the most. You both waited to discuss stuff till you knew you were calm and ready to get what the other was saying.
“Aren’t you too busy with work lately?”
He gave a humorous huff in return, not catching on.
“You know how it is once the season starts.”
“You literally got home last night and you had to go in again early in the morning?”
“Missed me?”
He had a playful grin on his face and it killed you to spoil the good mood.
"Of course, after all you're more committed to your cars than you are to me."
The words left your mouth and you were too far gone to be caring about it at this point. Lewis has been such a passionate lover so this sudden shift was hurting you.
“What was that?” he responded, his tone sharp with surprise.
However, you were done and already up to call in early but his words stopped you on our track.
“Wow. You're so insecure, it's exhausting trying to boost your ego all the time."
Tears immediately welled up in your eyes but you didn’t turn around and with a deflated sigh, walked into your bedroom before locking the door while Lewis stood frozen in his place, not believing his own words.
It was like he was in a stance and all he could do was listen to you cry through the closed door on a day when you guys were supposed to be celebrating each other’s wins.
Carlos Sainz
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Carlos was the perfect man. His mature yet easy going demeanor was exactly what you needed in a partner. You hadn't been together for that long to be at the altar but just enough to know that you were going to last.
You understood the demands on Carlos's time, with his career in the spotlight of the racing world when you decided to say yes to a date with him. Carlos was left with very less time away from all the glam, media and the track. Making it precious because of how rare it was.
You mostly accompanied him and let him drag you around to wherever he wanted once he had the break. So imagine your surprise when the only time you made some pretty important plans and he refused to tag alone.
"I can’t believe you’re saying no to this," you protested, frustration bubbling beneath the surface.
“I’m not saying no to anything, Carina.” He kissed your knuckles to un-knot the strong fist you’ve made of them. “I’m just suggesting we do it some other time.”
"But this is the third time, Carlos!" You stood up, unable to contain your hurt and disappointment. “Sorry if meeting my parents is such a chore for you.”
“You’re putting words in my mouth now.” Carlos responded with a sigh, attempting to pull you into a hug, which you reluctantly accepted. “It's not about it being a chore. You know I'd do anything for you, Y/N."
"I do know that, but actions speak louder than words, Carlos. My family is important to me."
“I promise that I want to meet them. I do. It's just… the timing."
"I don't want promises, Carlos. I want actions. If you can't even make it to meet my parents, what does that say about our future?" You insisted with a heavy heart, putting distance between you two.
"You're blowing this out of proportion, Y/N." Carlos countered, frustration evident in his voice.
"Out of proportion? I just wanted you to meet my family, and you can't even do that!"
“Well, I don’t have time to waste on this! If you want to go, just go alone!” His words hung in the air, a sharp pang of hurt piercing through you.
You immediately took a step back and saw him do the same. Both of you standing there as the silence stretched, contemplating in silence what exactly the next course of action was going to be.
“Y/N, I…” He trailed off as you glared at your foot, trying to hold the tears in before one eventually slipped and fell down your cheek.
“Baby, no! Don’t cry!” He panicked about extending his hand, about to touch you but you flinched away and shook your head.
“Carlos, if you think I’ll just ignore what you said ten seconds ago then you’re very wrong.” You whispered, your voice thick and husky.
Guess you were the only one from you both expecting this relationship to last. A second later, you were clutching your bag in your hand and walking towards the exit, speaking up before Carlos could beg you once again to ‘sit and talk it out.’
“Don’t,” you interrupted, your voice barely a whisper. “Thanks for letting me know that our time together was time wasted for you.”
You walked out with his heart in your pocket, your own splashed on the floor of your apartment.
Charles Leclerc
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Charles was the love of your life, the very time you saw him smile at you from across the room igniting a spark in you that shaped your future together.
He walked over to you with a pretty girl hanging onto his arm, leaving the impression that they were more than friends. Everyone around you was also convinced at the time that they were dating but Charles bluntly flirting with proved just how different the real life scenario was.
Pippa was just his ‘best friend,’ someone who throws side eyes at you every time you and your boyfriend are in close proximity to her. Despite nearly a year together, her hostility persisted, the woman was a different kind of vicious. Hell bent on draining your energy.
It was physically exhausting being around her with her catty sarcastic tone that Charles always failed to notice. It was just another one of those days and Charles dismissed your concerns as usual, leaving you frustrated.
This time it was pissing you off greatly.
"Doesn't she realize we're together?" You rolled your eyes.
Charles remained silent and that drew your brows together.
“Charles, does she not think we’re serious?”
“I don't think so. She's always been oblivious to these things.”
And honestly? That fucking hurt. It hurt to know that Charles noticed this but was still rather quick to defend her every time.
"But we've been together almost a year?”
"Baby, she just never pays attention.” His arm pulled you closer to his chest. “Or maybe she doesn't want to see it."
"Do you think she has feelings for you?”
There it was, the truth out in the open. As much as it made you want to die to say it out loud and acknowledge it, your body felt lighter while the comforting arm around your waist began to feel heavier.
"I don't know. Maybe?” Charles’ chest heaved with a deep sigh, "It's complicated?"
The heart beating in your chest stopped for a long second because of how unconcerned your boyfriend seemed right now. Was he seriously just going to accept that a person he has shared so much history with wants to steal him from you?
“It’s not that simple, darling. she's been a friend for years.”
“Yeah, well, friends don't act like that. She’s just what? Waiting for the right moment to swoop in and steal you away from me?”
Charles did not like it because the arm was moved away from you in a second and he was sitting a bit straighter now. He looked furious and ready to defend his best friend and all that was running through your head was how he would probably not do the same for you in front of her.
"That's enough, Y/N. You're being paranoid."
"Paranoid? Or realistic? Face it, Charles, you're so blind when it comes to her. It makes me feel so small compared to her!"
Charles, frustrated and defensive, ran a hand through his hair and shot back,"Don't flatter yourself thinking Pippa gives a damn about you or me."
Lando Norris
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No one could deny the magnetic pull Lando had on everyone around him. It was, after all, what drew you to him in the first place. You had your biases but he broke through them all with his shameless at worst and awkward at best flirting.
However, as you stood in a quiet corner to hide from the crowd, you couldn’t find it in yourself to sympathize with Lando. He had brought you to this glamorous social event, flashes of camera and expensive drinks overflowing all around you.
You were extremely excited to accompany your boyfriend especially since he had such an amazing season but throughout the evening, Lando was constantly pulled away by enthusiastic fans and demanding media, leaving you aside feeling like an accessory rather than his partner.
Standing in a quiet corner, you couldn't help but feel a pang of envy as you watched other couples bask in each other's company. You didn’t even know where Lando was at this very second.
Then, suddenly, his arms enveloped you from behind, his lips pressing gently against your head. "I'm sorry, babe. Everyone here just wants a piece of me," he murmured, attempting to console you.
You sighed and tried to calm yourself so you wouldn't explode in front of everyone, "I understand, but I miss spending time with you."
"I promise, I'll make it up to you tonight." Lando winked, keeping the conversation light.
That was all he said before someone from your left approached him again and your safety haven spot under the stairs was crowded with journalists a second later. You rolled your eyes before walking away, with half a mind to grab a cab and leave.
It was on your way back home when your patience finally ran its course as you listened to your boyfriend go on and on about how much of a success the event was.
“Why did you even take me with you?” You interrupted, your tone tinged with hurt and watched as the smile on his face got replaced with a frown.
“What?”
“I mean… you barely clicked two pictures with me and then left me to fetch for myself? You didn’t even come stand with me for more than a minute?”
"Babe, I'm sorry, but this is part of the job."
"I get it, but it doesn't make it easier.” You felt your own body shudder because of how overwhelmed you felt. “You were there talking to everyone but me!”
Lando opened his mouth to say something but you weren’t done yet.
“They were all strangers to me and you didn’t even acknowledge this! I was standing there alone the whole time, watching others and wondering why my boyfriend wasn’t there for me!”
The weight of your words hung heavily in the air, and for a moment, there was silence. You stopped to take a breath and not start crying. Then, Lando spoke, his words struck like a knife to the heart.
“This isn’t… This isn’t about you. Why are you always making it about you?”
Your body froze after that and your mind went blank. You didn’t care that the tears were running out of your eyes or that apologies were falling from his mouth. His own eyes were welling up because he knew.
He knew what he said was unacceptable.
You were so zoned out that as soon as the car stopped, you got out of the car. Thankful to catch the glimpse of yellow among the traffic before you hailed a taxi, the distance between you and Lando growing with each passing moment.
He attempted to hold your arm, his own tears falling down his face. You just wanted to put your point across but with his reaction, you were certain you guys were done for.
“I guess I expected a little too much from you, Lando.”
With a heavy heart, you walked away, knowing that sometimes love wasn't enough to mend the fractures in a relationship.
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©maxtermind // do not copy, rewrite or translate any of my work on any platforms.
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whatsk-poppinhomies · 2 months
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Pairing : Dad!Bangchan x F!Reader TW : Chans daughter is not readers child ; Chans ex wife and daughter are shit starters ; drama of course ; angsty ; honestly, poor Chan ; fluffy ending though ; slightly suggestive at the end as well ; Word Count : 6.5k Request : Anonny : Please write an angsty / fluffy fic about Dad!chan who, after years of not dating, finally decides to get back into dating & when he finally finds someone he doesn't tell reader he has a teenage daughter because he doesn't know how reader would feel about it but when reader finds out they're really upset and avoid him and his daughter reaches out to reader and convinces reader to talk to Chan and make up because she hates seeing her dad upset. A/N : This request is so cute and I'm so happy I get to write it. Of course, it will be super drama because I love when it happens, and with Chans recent bbl messages we know this man loves this kind of shit, so... This is for Chan and Chan stans and we love Chan!
“I got a call from your teacher today, Ella.” Chan said as his daughter walked through the front door. “They said your grades haven’t been the best lately, that you haven’t been focusing in class. Is something wrong? Do you have something going on?” He didn’t want to be the kind of father that always got on his child when their grades were below average, but he also didn’t want his daughter to flunk out. He wanted to see her be successful and happy in life, that’s all he ever wanted. 
“I’ve just been going through some stuff, dad.” Ella mumbled as she kicked her shoes into the corner near the front door and dropped her bags onto the floor. “Mom said she’s been trying to get in touch with you lately. I guess she saw that you’ve been posting about going out on your facebook.” She pulled out the chair across the table from Chan. “Why don’t I get to meet your new girlfriend?” 
Chan rolled his eyes, finally looking up from his phone to look at his daughter. “You’re changing the subject. What I do in my spare time isn’t important. Your grades are. So tell me, what kind of stuff have you been going through that’s been keeping you from being able to focus. Maybe I can help.” 
She huffed loudly, the attitude that he was warned would come along with a teenage daughter was in full force now. “It’s not even important anyway… Don’t you have a date to go on tonight? That’s all you ever talk about anymore. It’s like you don’t even care that mom left…” It was finally making sense to him, but it hurt that she felt that way. He had been kind enough to keep his ex wife’s dirty secrets just that, a secret, so that Ellas view of her mother wouldn’t be warped. He was trying to do the right thing, but it was becoming harder and harder. 
“I do care that your mother left… I was hurt by it for a long time, El. It’s been 8 years, and I think that it’s time that I’ve finally moved on because she isn’t coming back. Your mother has gotten remarried, divorced, and married again in those 8 years and I haven’t been with anyone until just a few months ago. I don’t think you’re being very fair right now.” He tried to explain, but he could tell, he could just see it in her face that she wasn’t ready to hear about it. “And, just so you know, I don’t have a date to go on tonight. I was planning on being here to help you with your homework and studying so that I don’t get another call like I had today.” 
///
“Had a late night in the studio, huh?” You said as you walked up behind Chan, your arms draping over his shoulders as he sat in front of his computer in his office. You could tell he was tired, he could barely sit up straight and his eyes wouldn’t stay open for longer than a few seconds. “It’s okay to take a break, bubs. It’s 3racha, not ChrisRacha.” 
He snickered at the little name, finally swiveling his chair around to face you and pulling you down onto his lap. “You sound like everyone else. I don’t like taking breaks, it gives me too much time to think about the time that I’m wasting.” He explained, his voice was groggy and not even laced, but completely filled with exhaustion. “I’ll be fine once I go over your place tonight, we can cuddle up and watch a movie.” He nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck, his hot breath against your skin sending a wave of goosebumps all over. 
“They’re repainting all of the apartments, I can’t even go into my own house right now. I’ve been staying with my parents.” You reminded him, although you were sure you had texted him about it and told him about it in the days leading up to the renovation. “We can go over to your place. We’ve been dating for 4 months now and you haven’t even invited me over.” 
There was a reason for that, a reason that you didn’t know of, but he felt it was just better if you didn’t find out. The last thing he wanted was for you to run off because he had a daughter, not just any daughter though, a teenage daughter who was still hung up on the divorce of her parents. She wasn’t the easiest to get along with, and although Chan had tried to butter her up to the prospect of one day meeting you, she didn’t take too kindly to the fact that he was dating again. “My place is a mess…” He lied, trying to muffle his words in the fabric of your shirt so you wouldn’t pick up on it. “We can go to a hotel if you’d like.” 
“That seems sleezy…” You mumbled, and he felt awful, he truly did. It felt like he was stuck between a rock and a hard place. He absolutely loves his daughter with every ounce of his heart, his entire being, he loved being her father. He loved you too though, you had been the light at the end of a very long, very dark tunnel. He didn’t want to have to choose between the two of you, it just didn’t seem fair. “I guess we’ll just wait for my apartment to be ready…” He could feel you trying to pull away, he could tell that you were upset, he didn’t want you to leave like that, so he tightened his arms around you, holding you close to him. 
“You’re not sleezy! I’m sorry I even recommended that, you’re better than that.” He quickly tried to get himself out of the hole that he had dug, it felt like he was clawing his way to the top, and everytime he got halfway out, he’d slip and he’d fall right back to the bottom. “I’ll clean my place, I just want it to be perfect for when you come over. Okay? You deserve the best.” 
The tension slowly left your body, he felt you soften up against him, and for a moment, it felt like he could breathe again. “Okay… Fine. I’ll wait… I just really miss sleeping next to you.” You whispered, and those words made his stomach feel warm and fuzzy. He missed sleeping next to you too. “I have to get back to work though… I’ll see you later. Try taking a break though, take a nap or something, that’s what the couch is for.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek before getting up, his arms reluctantly loosening around you until you were free to go. “Seriously, get some sleep.” 
///
“Where are you going?” Ella asked from the couch, watching Chan storm to the front door and yank his coat off the hook. “Did you and your girlfriend get into a little fight? Do you have to go kiss and make up now?” The mocking tone in her voice would usually only slightly irritate him, but he was already beyond irritated at the reason he had to leave in the first place. 
“No, it’s your damn mother.” He snapped, pulling his shoes on before grabbing his keys. “I don’t know how long she’ll hold me up, there’s food in the freezer, or you can grab my wallet out of my bag and order yourself something. Try to do some studying while I’m gone, please?” And without another word he was out the front door, slamming it behind him. 
What Chan didn’t know was that he had left his wallet at work on his studio desk, and you had gone into his studio before leaving to see if he was there but only found his wallet. He must have left the building without saying anything to you, and you wondered if maybe he was sick or something had happened back at his place. You were doing the right thing, at least that’s what you felt you were doing. You were just going to take his wallet home to him and check up on him. You didn’t mind that his house might be a little dirty, you completely understood that he was busy, you didn’t expect his house to be immaculate. 
You weren’t sure why you were so nervous to stand in front of his front door, but a chill ran through your body and you had to take a few breaths before even lifting your hand to knock. Once you did, you took a step back, listening to the locks being undone before the door opened. It wasn’t who you expected to see, it wasn’t Chan, it was a girl, she looked younger, at least 15 or 16. “Oh, I’m sorry. I must have read the address wrong.” You quickly apologized, bowing your head to the girl before turning away. 
“Who are you looking for?” The girl asked, and what you weren’t aware of was that she had seen Chans wallet in your hand, she knew that you had come to the right address, she was just playing a game that you didn’t know about. You quickly said his name, and she let out a soft hum. “He’s out right now. It’s date night for him and my mom.” You felt your stomach sink, deeper and deeper until it couldn’t go any further. “Is that his wallet? Thank you so much for bringing it, I’m sure he’ll be happy to know that you brought it back. Hopefully he’ll answer his phone so he can pick it up and pay the bill, you know?” 
You nodded slowly, the bile from your stomach rising into your throat. “Y-Yeah… Of course… H-Here you go.” You stammered, your hand shaking as you handed the wallet over to the girl. You knew she wasn’t lying, she looked so much like Chan it was uncanny. Why hadn’t he told you? What was he even doing with you? He had a wife, or at least a girlfriend or fiancee… He had a child… But he was going around with you? It was beginning to add up though… Why he always wanted to go over your house. Why he’d rather go to a hotel than to bring you to his own place. You felt absolutely sick. 
“Have a good night!” The girl chimed cheerfully as you made your way back to your car, the light from inside the house that had illuminated the front yard faded until you were covered in darkness. You were devastated, you were heartbroken… You had never felt more humiliated in your life and all you wanted to do was go crawl underneath a rock and hide there. 
///
The meeting with his ex wife the night before had stressed Chan out beyond belief. He couldn’t believe that after 8 years she wanted to fight for custody of Ella now. Her reasoning behind it would have been laughable if they hadn’t been so damn ridiculous. By the time he had gotten home though, Ella was already in bed and he was so tired from dealing with his ex that he had gone right to bed as well. By morning, Ella had already left for school, so he’d have to wait until he got off work and she got home from school to even talk to her about what her mother had said. 
Now, he was only looking forward to seeing you. You were the only person at this point who could calm him down and bring him some semblance of peace, at least for the short amount of time that he got to be with you. “Hey, lovely.” He called to you when he caught you walking down the hall. Usually you’d smile and wave, you’d even run over to him sometimes if the hall was empty. This time you just shook your head before lowering it and walking right by him. 
It was a shock to say the least, and his mind immediately jumped to the worst, although he couldn’t be 100% sure of what had happened that would cause you to be acting like this. Was it because of the hotel comment the day before? Was it because he wouldn’t let you come over to his house? It couldn’t be that though, he had talked to you about it. It had to be something more, but he couldn’t figure it out. You looked absolutely pissed, like you didn’t want anything to do with him. 
“Y/N!” He called out your name now, jogging down the hall to catch up with you, but you didn’t even look up at him, and you sure as hell didn’t slow down. In fact, it seemed like you sped up, like you were trying to get away from him. “Hey… What… What’s wrong? What happened? Are you okay?” He lowered his voice but quickened his steps to keep up with you, trying to duck down just enough to get a view of your face, but every time he got close enough you’d look away. 
“I don’t want to talk to you, I don’t want to see you. Whatever it was that you made me think we had, it’s over. I’d like it if you left me alone now.” You stated flatly, your arms tightening around the multitude of folders that you clutched to your chest. “I’m changing groups, I won’t be one of your staff anymore as well, so please, don’t bother me anymore.” 
Something had happened, and it wasn’t something that could easily be fixed like Chan thought. It was worse, way worse. You had basically fired yourself from being his group's staff because of whatever happened. “Hold on!” His fingers wrapped around your upper arm, stopping you from going any further. “So you’re just… Breaking up with me? You’re not even going to tell me why!?” His voice cracked as it rose in pitch, his chest rising and falling heavily as the panic fully set in. “I fucking love you, Y/N… You can’t just do this to me and not tell me why.” 
When you finally looked up, he could see your eyes were glistening, your bottom lashes bedazzled with twinkling tears that clung onto them. You were just as upset as he was. “Stop pretending, Christopher!” You croaked out, sniffling loudly once the words left your chapped lips. “I refuse to be the rebound chick that you think you can run to when your marriage is on the rocks. I won’t be strung along by you, not anymore.” You took a few deep, shaky breaths to compose yourself before you pulled your arm free of Chans hold. “Now, if you don’t mind… I have another group to meet. I have work to do. I do believe that you have some work to do as well.” You bowed your head to him before turning and walking away, leaving him more confused than he was before. 
His marriage… It had fallen apart years ago when he had come home to find his wife in bed with another man while his daughter was fast asleep in the room across the hall. It had been disgusting, heartbreaking, it would have been his downfall if not for his daughter and the moral, mental, and emotional support of the guys. He wasn’t sure why it was being brought up, he didn’t even know how you had found out, but that same feeling of devastation that he had felt 8 years ago was flooding him once again. 
The guys… They were the only ones who would be able to talk to you, they were the only ones who knew about the secret past that Chan was trying so hard to hide from you. Would they do something like that though? Would they hurt him like that? “Yo! What’s up?” Changbin said as he came up behind Chan, his arm draping over his shoulder. “You’re… crying? What happened?” The cheerful tone was immediately dropped, and even though Changbin was younger, he was in full protection mode. 
“Y/N… She… She broke up with me…. She knows about Sana…” He gasped out the words, each of them getting caught in his throat, it felt like he was choking. “Somebody told her… Someone… They had to have told her! Who!?” He was shouting now, his sadness turning to anger in a matter of seconds. The look of confusion of Changbins face was enough for Chan to know that he had no idea what Chan was talking about, and that in itself proved his innocence. That left 6 more guys to question. 
“Y-You know that none of us would do that to you… Why would we do that? You were happy!” Changbin quickly defended the others as well, seeing in Chans eyes that he was on the warpath and he wasn’t going to stop until he found out who had told you. “I… I do know she went to the studio last night after you left… She… She said something about your wallet but… Maybe she went to your house to drop it off and… and…-” 
“Ella…” Chan muttered out the name, a loud groan leaving him as his head fell back. “I have to go… Will you be okay? Can you run practice for me?” Now he was in a hurry, a hurry to get home, to talk to you… He had so many things he had to do, he didn’t even know where to begin. Changbin nodded his head, patting Chans shoulder before taking a step back. Truthfully, Chan didn’t know what the hell he was going to do… But he knew he had to do something. He wasn’t going to lose you… He couldn’t. 
///
“Sit. Now.” Chan said, not even giving his daughter time to fully come through the door before the words left his mouth. He had been sitting at the table, thinking over and over about how he’d go about bringing it up to her, but now that she was finally home, all of his thoughts had gone out the window and all he could feel was irritation. She rolled her eyes, dropping off her bag and kicking her shoes off like she did every day, heading in the direction of her bedroom. “Did you not hear me? I want to talk to you.” 
“About what?” She snapped, whipping around to face him. “About the lady that showed up on our front porch last night?” Chans eyes widened, he didn’t even have to drag it out of her, she wasn’t a liar… and for that, he was proud, he had at least taught her one good thing. “Did she dump you? Well good… You don’t deserve to be happy. Not after what you did to mom…” After… what he did…? He was stunned into silence, his head cocked to the side as he tried to think about what he could have possibly done to make him the bad guy in all of this. “She told me all about it, don’t try to act like you’re so innocent.” 
Those weren’t Ellas words, those were her mothers words and she was speaking them for her. “I tried so hard to protect your mother for some reason… So that you wouldn’t think badly of her… And this is what she does.” He mumbled, running his hand through his hair and sighing heavily. “Can you please sit? I really need to talk to you…” He stretched his legs under the table, pushing out the chair across from him and motioning to it with his head. He could see the reluctance, but she finally made her way over, dropping down into the chair, but not without an eye roll and a look of disgust. “I didn’t want to tell you the truth… I didn’t want you to see your mother as anything less than what she is… But I wasn’t the one who did anything. Your mother is the reason we’re divorced…” 
“You’re a liar… She said that you’d lie…” Ella mumbled, her arms crossing over her chest as she glared at her father. “Just like you lied to that lady. She didn’t even know I existed! You kept me a secret from her… Why? Are you embarrassed of me? Are you ashamed of me?” The sulky teenage attitude subsided, and he could see that she wasn’t just angry, she was upset. He never meant for it to be like this, he didn’t even think that something like this would happen. It’s not like he planned on keeping his daughter hidden forever… He just didn’t want to spring it all on you at the beginning of the relationship. 
“No! God, no… El… You are an amazing daughter, you’re smart and you’re funny… You’re the most wonderful thing I’ve ever created. I’m so proud of you…” He whispered, and he could see the tears beginning to form in her eyes. He should have told her these things a long time ago, maybe she wouldn’t be acting out, but it was too late, and now all he could do was try to fix things piece by piece. “I didn’t want to bring someone into your life unless I knew that it was serious… It’s one thing for me to be hurt… But I didn’t want you to potentially get close to her just for her to leave and hurt you too.” He swallowed thickly, taking a deep breath to prepare himself before continuing. “I divorced your mother… Because she cheated on me, Ella. Do you really think I would have gotten custody of you if it were the other way around? The man she married… That’s… That’s the guy… And they’re already divorced… And she’s already married again. She’s been married twice since the divorce, and I… I haven’t been with anyone until a couple months ago. Do you think that would be the case if I was the one who had screwed up?” He could see the gears turning in her mind as she thought about everything that he was saying, and he could see that it was all adding up. “Your mother wanted to meet up with me yesterday because she’s trying to get custody of you…” 
Ellas eyes widened and her head shook fast. “No… I don’t… I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to live with her, dad.” The words were rushed out, full fledged panic written across her features. “Don’t let her take me… I want to stay with you… I’m sorry… I’m sorry I told the lady that you were having date night with mom. I’m sorry that I ruined it… I’m sorry… Please don’t let her take me.” She was crying now, absolutely bawling, and it broke his heart to see his daughter so upset. 
He jumped out of his chair, running around to her side of the table and pulling her up into his arms. Right now, she wasn’t just a teenager with a bit of an attitude problem… She was his little girl, and he was going to protect her and he was going to keep her safe. He was going to fix everything, no matter what it took. “She’s not going to get you, she won’t win. You’re staying here with me… I promise.” 
///
“Have you gotten a hold of her?” Ella asked, dropping down onto the couch beside her father. It had been weeks since the last time he had spoken to you, but he had seen you in the halls at the building every single day. No matter how many times he tried to stop you and explain everything, you’d just keep walking like you didn’t know him at all. Ella could see that it was breaking him, and she knew that it was her fault. “I’m really sorry, dad…” She mumbled. 
Your picture was still his lockscreen, and every time a notification would pop up on his phone he would jump up, a single second of excitement and wishful thinking, only to be let down once he realized it was someone, anyone but you. “It’s okay… I’m gonna try to get some work done. Let me know when you get hungry, I’ll make us some dinner, yeah?” And she nodded slowly, waiting for Chan to get up and go into his little office before running to the front door and pulling on her shoes. If he wasn’t able to fix it, maybe she could. 
The walk to the building wasn’t too far, and she knew that, for the most part, whenever her father went into his office it was so he could cry in private. That usually lasted a couple hours, and she was sure that she wouldn’t need too much time. 
Everyone in the building knew her, they had heard so much about Chans daughter that she was looked at as an idol herself. They all welcomed her warmly, but she was on a mission. “Hi! Would you happen to know where an Y/L/N Y/N is? My dad sent me to make sure she got something.” She came up with it quickly, and no one seemed to question it either. They gave her the information just as fast and sent her on her way… It was far too easy… She’d have to talk to her dad about that. 
The ride up the elevator gave her enough time to think about what she would say, or at least a little bit of what she’d say. Truth be told, she was nervous. She wanted things to go well for her fathers sake, but she knew that the trouble she had caused and what she did could have irreversible damage. 
When the doors slid open, it was like fate had brought her here at this exact moment, because you were standing right outside the doors. “Oh… Uhm… I-I remember you…” You murmured, bowing your head to her before taking a step back. “I think you’re on the wrong floor though… Your father is a couple floors down.” 
Ella shook her head, stepping out of the elevator, trying to look like she wasn’t a nervous wreck standing in front of you. “I’m here to talk to you.” She said, her head held high just to exemplify the false feeling of confidence that she was trying to give off. “Are you busy?” 
“I’m very sorry if me being with your father created any problems. I’m not with him anymore though… And, with all due respect… I’m just trying to move on.” 
“That’s the problem though!” Ella blurted out as you moved past her and stepped into the elevator, turning around quickly on her heel to face you, her hand pressed against the elevator door to keep it from closing. “Him and my mother aren’t together… They haven’t been together for 8 years. I… I was upset because… I didn’t understand what happened… I didn’t know why my parents weren’t together and… My mom lied and… And I’m sorry. My dad really loves you… And he wanted me to meet you… And he’s been crying every night because I ruined your relationship because I lied just like my mom and I’m… I’m really sorry, ma’am…” 
She was once again crying, and you didn’t really know what to do, but it felt wrong to just stand there and watch her cry, so you hesitantly stepped out of the elevator and gave her the most awkward one armed hug. “It’s… It’s okay…” You murmured, and much to your surprise, she turned her body completely toward you and wrapped her arms around you. Whether there was a maternal bone in your body at all before this moment or not, you immediately felt the urge to comfort her, to make sure she was okay, to wipe her tears and tell her that everything would be fine. “Hey… Hey, let’s go to my office. We can get a drink and some tissues and then… I’ll take you home. Is that okay?” 
Ella nodded slowly, her face scrunched up and her bottom lip pushed out. She really did look like her father. “Will you talk to him?” She asked weakly, and as much as you hated him… Now that you knew the truth… It felt like the right thing to do, so you hummed in agreement to her question, leading her down the hall to your little office and pushing the door open for her. “Y-You know… You’re still his main picture on his phone. He’s waiting for you to text him or call him or something… He misses you so much.” 
You were sure that she didn’t mean to tell you so much, and you were very sure that Chan would be incredibly embarrassed if he found out that his daughter was telling you so much. “I’ll talk to him, I promise… Pinky promise.” You held out your hand, your pinky extended to her, and she quickly latched her finger around yours, a bittersweet smile tugging at her lips. 
“You are really pretty… He wasn’t lying… And you’re really nice too. I would be really mad at me if I were you…” She lowered her head, her entire body slouching forward as she sat in the chair across your desk. “Why aren’t you mad at me?” Her voice was below a whisper, her question genuine, and you didn’t really know how to answer it. 
“Well…” You began, your fingers drumming against your lap as you leaned back in your chair. “I don’t blame you for what you did… You’re a child and… And your parents divorced. I’m sure that any child would be upset if they found out either of their parents was dating someone else, especially if the kid doesn’t understand why their parents divorced in the first place. You were protected from the truth… But it made you do something that you regret. It’s still not your fault though, it’s no one's fault.” You reached across your desk, your hand faced up for her, and she slowly placed her hand in yours, the smile from earlier returning to her face, but this time it was just a little bigger and it reached her eyes. “Let’s go see your dad, yeah?” 
///
Chan had at some point cried himself to sleep while sitting in front of his computer, but the sound of a soft knock on the door had him jolting awake. “Dad?” Ellas voice came between the small crack in the door as she peeked inside, and he quickly wiped the sleep from his eyes as he got up from his chair, almost bringing his entire laptop with him since he forgot to take the headphones off. “I ordered dinner for us… It’s here.” She said between little giggles at the way he stumbled. It was nice to hear her laugh, he hadn’t heard it in a bit, not from anyone in the house. He wondered what had changed. 
“You didn’t have to do that, I would have cooked for us…” He said somberly, but he knew that she was doing it as a favor for him. He was a wreck, it was visibly noticeable that he hadn’t had more than a few hours of sleep in the past two weeks, he had bags under his eyes and his hair was a mess. He was a shell of the man that he once was when he had you, but he knew he had to get better, he wasn’t sure how he would do that, but it wasn’t fair to Ella to constantly be like this, it would only make her feel more guilty. “I’ll be right out… Thank you.” He said when she hovered in the doorway, and he watched her walk away. There was a bounce in her step, she hadn’t been this peppy in a while. He was genuinely curious and now he was rushing out of the little studio room so that he’d be able to sit down and talk to her, maybe he could find out what was going on. 
“I hope you don’t mind, I brought a friend over.” She said from the kitchen. He was adamant that he had never heard her bring up a friend, especially not one that would come over and visit. Was it a boy? She never mentioned liking anyone at school… Was she too scared to talk to him about those kinds of things? He made a mental note to sit down and talk to her about it one day this week. “Are you coming?” She called out and he hummed in agreement, trudging out of the little room with his head hung just a little. 
This wasn’t the first impression that he wanted one of his daughter's friends to have of him as her father. He wanted to look more respectable for the sake of Ellas reputation. It seemed like he didn’t really have a choice though, she was rushing him to come out, and he didn’t want to keep her and whoever she had over waiting. “I apologize, I wasn’t really told that you’d be coming over.” Chan began as he walked down the hall, and he completely froze when he saw just who his daughter had brought over. 
“I don’t think anyone really knew I was coming over.” You said lightly, the warmest smile spreading across your face as you looked at him. He couldn’t say anything, he couldn’t find words, all he could manage to do was open his mouth and croak out sounds as salty tears pricked his eyes. “Is it… okay… that I’m here?” You asked when the silence lasted longer than you thought it would, and he nodded his head fervently, wiping his eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie. 
“It’s… It’s more than okay… I just… I don’t know why… I don’t mind it though.” He rambled, looking between you and Ella who was currently setting the table for three people instead of the usual two. “You’re… staying for dinner?” He questioned, and you gave him that adorable, heart stopping smile that had stopped him in the halls of the building all of those months ago, the smile that had pushed him over the edge and made him fall for you in the beginning. 
“Yes she is.” Ella spoke up, clapping her hands together to get both of your attention. “Do you want me to eat in my room… So the two of you can talk? I’m sure you have a lot to talk about… I can leave you alone if you’d like.” But you shook your head, walking over to the table and playfully ruffling her hair before opening the takeout bag and pulling out the contents. 
“I’d like it a whole lot if you stayed and ate with us… But if you want to eat in your room… If your dad says it’s okay… Then you can.” You sounded so… sweet, the way a mother would talk to her own daughter, and the craziest part was that Ella smiled at you before taking a seat at the table, she actually listened to you… There was no attitude that came alone with it. “Are you just going to stand there and look at the food, or are you going to join us in eating it?” You asked, bringing Chan out of his own thoughts and back into the room. 
“Yeah… Yeah, I’m coming…” Chan whispered, walking into the dining room and taking his usual seat, but the aura at the table was a lot different now. It’s like the whole room had gotten 10 times brighter, and no matter which way he looked he was met with a warm smile. He had so many questions, but he knew that he had all the time in the world to ask them, and regardless of the answer… He knew that things would be better now, all of the pieces were falling back into place, and the picture was more beautiful than he had ever imagined it to be. 
~6 Months Later~
“You’re gonna absolutely crush this test, I know you will.” You stood at the stove, preparing breakfast as Ella sat at the table, her face buried in her text book to get as much last minute studying in before she had to go to school. “No matter what, I want you to remember that your dad and I are so proud of you and how hard you work. Okay? We love you.” Ella hummed softly, not even looking up from her book, but you could see that she was smiling, and that was enough of a response for you to know that she had heard you, that she was listening. You carefully placed her plate down beside her, lightly tapping the table to get her attention. “Please eat. Okay?” 
Chan ran out of the bedroom, his eyes barely even opened, his shirt wrinkled and twisted and his hair sticking up in all different directions. “Did she leave yet?!” He asked rather loudly, rubbing the sleep from his eyes and blinking a few times before focusing in on his daughter who was looking up at him, her shoulders shaking with silent laughter. “Don’t laugh, it’s not funny. I wanted to give you a hug before you left.” He pouted, and she quickly got up out of her chair, rushing over to Chan and wrapping her arms around him. “You’ll do great. I-” 
“No more speeches! You guys are going to make me cry!” Ella dramatically whined, pulling away from Chan and running back to the table to pack her things into her bag and then shoveling as much food into her mouth as she could before going to the front door. “Love you! I’ll see you later!” She mumbled with her mouth full of food, and before the two of you could say it back she was out the door. 
Once the door was shut, Chan walked over to you, his arms wrapping around your from behind as he rested his chin against your shoulder. “Hey…” He murmured, pressing a kiss to your cheek that was dampened by tears that you hadn’t even realized had begun to fall. “What’s wrong, lovey?” He cooed, gently turning you around to face him, his head cocked to the side. 
“I don’t know… I just… I’ve only been here for six months and… We’ve gotten so close and… She’ll be going off to college soon if that’s what she wants to do… But… I’m gonna miss her and the house is gonna be so empty and…” You pouted up at Chan who couldn’t help but find it adorable the way you were right now. It was the most heartwarming thing, to know that you loved his daughter so much already that you were crying at the thought of her leaving. 
“Well… We have the house to ourselves for a couple of hours… We could watch a movie or something to take your mind off of being sad… Or… We could go have some fun… Surprise Ella with a brother or a sister when she comes home from college…” Your eyes widened at the suggestion, but your feet were already moving in the direction of the bedroom, that all too familiar tingly feeling building in your stomach. “We can watch a movie when we’re done… If you’re not too tired.” 
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kennarose1108 · 11 months
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Clingy (Miguel O'Hara x Reader)
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At the beginning of your relationship, Miguel was distant from you as you expected him to be. He didn't want to get close to you because he didn't want to feel the need to depend on you. He lost so much and he was afraid if he got close to you he'd lose you too. But as time went on he grew more attached to you. You were so kind and beautiful he just couldn't get enough of you.
But as he got more attached his fear of losing you grew and it got more clingy towards you, afraid if he let you go you'd somehow die on him. He didn't want to smother you of course and he kept his distance when he realized he was doing too much but you honestly didn't mind his clinginess. It always reminded you of how far you came with him and you felt loved.
Nights were the worst for Miguel though, he always clung to you when you both went to bed and if he woke up and you weren't in his arms he'd always check the bed and every time you were there. He'd reach his hand out to touch the fabric and your body was always there to meet with his hand. Then he'd pull you closer to him and he'd fall back asleep. He was afraid in the night someone would take you away from him, it was one of his worst fears.
Because of his anxieties, you tried not to get out of bed at night. If you needed to use the bathroom you'd try to be quiet to not wake him and freak him out. And you always succeeded. But tonight was different. You woke up and felt your throat was abnormally dry. You couldn't fall back asleep with your throat like this, it just wasn't possible. So you quietly got out of bed and headed to the kitchen.
As you were in the kitchen Miguel woke up. He felt you weren't in his arms anymore and he reached out to touch you… But you weren't there. He furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and continued to search for you, but still nothing. Then his eyes shot open and he noticed the empty spot next to him and the panic set in. He sat up and called for you, "Y/N?!" He yelled. His anxieties were telling him the worst, he was afraid someone kidnapped you or even killed you.
He hopped out of bed and pushed through the bedroom door, "Y/N?!?" He yelled again. You jumped as the impact of the door hitting the wall scared you. His body psychically untensed when he saw you in the kitchen with a glass of water in your hand. "Miguel? Honey, what's wrong?" You ask as you set the glass on the counter with a concerned look on your face. His body was visibly shaking and his breathing was hard. You walked over to Miguel and gently brushed your hand against his cheek. "I'm okay… I was just getting some water… I'm still here with you, don't worry." You say while resting your hand against his chest. You felt his heart beating fast and you frowned. "Go back to bed Miguel… I'll be there in a moment, okay?" You say with a reassuring smile. Miguel nodded and slowly walked back into the room.
You walked back to your glass and drank down the liquid. When you finished you placed the glass into the sink and walked back into the room. When you walked in Miguel was sitting up in bed and looking down at the bed in sadness. Your heart broke at the sight of him looking so defeated. You walked over to Miguel and ran your fingers through his hair.
He leaned into your touch and sighed. You crawled into his lap and straddled his hips. You pulled him into a hug and he wraps his arms tightly around your body. He rested his face into the crook of your neck and you rubbed your fingernails gently along his scalp and his back.
"I'm sorry…" Miguel mumbled. "You have nothing to be sorry for… It's okay to be afraid." You say while placing a kiss on his head. "Yeah but… I feel like I'm smothering you…" Miguel murmurs. "Miguel. Look at me." You say while pulling away and cupping his cheeks. He looked into your eyes and you noticed the tears in them, you frown even more. "You're not smothering me. I love being close to you and I understand why you're afraid. Nothing that you have done has ever bothered me." You say with a reassuring smile. Your words seemed to relax Miguel. He nodded and he blinked away the tears in his eyes. "Okay… Now, let's go back to sleep hm?" You say before placing a kiss on his nose.
As you were about to crawl to your side of the bed Miguel stopped you. One of the hands that were on your waist traveled up and cupped one of your cheeks. He then leaned in and kissed your lips and you returned the kiss with a smile. The kiss was gentle and full of love… Just full of love, nothing else. He pulled away and smiled at you. You smiled back before crawling to your side of the bed. You went under the covers and laid down, Miguel doing the same. He pulled you close to his body and held you tight and you returned the favor by wrapping your arms tightly around his torso. He sighed in relaxation and he felt comfortable and content with you.
"Te amo más que a nada mi amor…" Miguel whispered in your ear as you drifted off into sleep.
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cheriladycl01 · 3 months
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No because that hurt me! Lando Norris x Girlfriend! Reader Part 1
Plot: Lando goes one step too far ...
Warnings: Mentions of Assault (From a random on the street)
Credit to purplephantomwolf for the GIF
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"Hey baby!" you grin pulling your boyfriend of three years into a hug.
You'd met Lando randomly, you weren't a model and you didn't have a rich dad. You weren't at all famous, you had a private Instagram account that only really had some of the drivers that Lando introduced you to like Oscar and Logan, and then Max, Charles, Carlos and Daniel.
You actually house-flipped, and properly house-flipped. Not one of those super rich people who come buy a decent plot of land with a small little shack on it and turn it into their dream manor. You however have built you way up, you and the team you work with. You were a graphic designer/ architect so you would design the houses and draw a floor plan, helping the carpenters when showing them your vision.
It was a great job, that was incredibly flexible when it came to travelling with Lando. At first it was stressful, being his WAG and everything. People didn't think you spent enough time at the track and weren't good enough for Lando, but you did try to constantly attend every race you possibly could, which made Lando more than happy.
He honestly liked, kind of keeping you bubble wrapped in a way. His other relationships had ended because of the harsh media and the fans and he didn't want that to happen with you. But this sometimes would get suffocating.
"Hey" he grins at you, he roughly pulls you into a hug that you return with a laugh into his shoulder.
"I'm so so proud of you, for your first Formula 1 win!" you exclaim, kissing his cheek and he kisses your head. Reporters flood around you as well as the mechanics and you start to feel a little crushed. You see Oscar and Lily to one side and Lily nudges Oscar seeing the look on your face and that you're looking a little flushed and panicked.
Oscar manages to pull you out and you thank him, laughing along with Lily as you regain your composure.
"Are you okay?" Oscar asks.
"Yeah, I'm going to go wait for Lando on his driver room. He'll want to celebrate tonight I'm sure of it" you smile. You walk off, waving to people through the paddock before entering the Mclaren motorhome.
You sit patiently waiting for him to come and meet you in the driver's room, just scrolling threw TikTok and Instagram making a post about your boyfriends win. You were so happy for him that you felt like you needed to share that with your few followers on your main account. You also had an account for your house flipping, that was public and fans followed you on there instead, so you made a story to congratulate him on there as well.
You waited and waited for what felt like hours, until you stepped out of his drivers room not hearing many people around anymore.
"Hello?" you called out.
You walked out through to find only a few mechanics left still packing away.
"Hey guys, where's everybody gone?" you ask starting to help feeling bad that there was only a few workers left on site. You look around seeing some light coming from the other motorhomes but it was similar to here at Mclaren.
"Thanks for the help Y/N but you don't have too, everyone's left for the night!" he smiles at you and you stop confused.
"Everyone? Even Lando?" you ask confused as to why he hadn't come and seen you yet.
"Oh yeah Lando, left about an hour ago? Went back to the hotel with Max and Daniel i think" he admits as he walks with you.
"He didn't come looking for me?" you ask and the guy has a thoughtful look before shaking his head at you.
"Oh, erm okay. Well, I'm sort of stuck here, can i help you guys at all with packing up?" you ask, hoping that one of the mechanics would be nice enough to give you a lift.
"Sure, come on!" he advises before showing you he little pieces that you could help them pack away. You stayed until Mclaren were pretty much done, but seeing your phone blow up with millions of notifications you decided to check.
Message from Oscah - Where are you? Thought Lando said you were meeting us here?
Message from Lils Z - Girl, where you at. I need you here at the after party :(
Message from Maxie Fewtie - Lando's being weird, where the hell are you?!
Message from P - Y/N, i thought you were coming with me and Max to the club? Aren't you coming?
You then move onto Instagram checking all the stories from you friends. You could see Lando was already at the club, up at the DJ booth Max feeling with Daniel dancing behind him. In Daniel's story you see Lando lean into a girl at the club as she talks to him, nodding at whatever she said. It made you frown at first but he was DJing so it was probably a request. But still why had he left without you and not bothered to text you.
"I'm really sorry, I'm going to have to go guys!" you exclaim, seeing all the notifs.
"Are you going to be okay, how will you get back?" the mechanic asks worry etching on his face.
"I can walk, it'll be fine and good for me to get fresh air. I thought maybe someone would have realized I'm missing by now and come and got me. I'll be okay!" you smile before pulling the hood of Lando's hoodie up over you head.
You make the cold walk and halfway through when you start to feel uncomfortable with how quiet the road is you try to call Lando, he didn't answer making you sigh and tears brim your eyes.
"You alright pretty!" A man exclaims coming up to you making you freeze in shock. He grabs your arm, making you gasp loudly looking round trying to catch someone's eyes for help.
"You seem lost, let me help" he grins, gripping onto your waist, a weak whimper coming our your mouth as you attempt to push his hands away. His breath smells horrid and his hands are cold on your exposed wrist.
"Y/N!" A voice shouts and you turn round seeing the mechanic from earlier and two other guys in the car all glaring at the man.
"These your friends darling, or are you a little slut with three men at your feet. You come with me, I'd give you a better time than these little boys" he scoffs looking at them.
"Y/N, come join us in the car" the one driving directs, you immediately go sitting in the back next to the mechanic who was in the back. Tears were streaming down your face at this point and you just wanted to go home.
"Y/N, hey hey its okay. He's gone now your safe!" the one next to you exclaims, pulling you in for a hug.
"Please, please can you just take me to the club Lando is at" you admit looking at Dan who was the mechanic driving.
"Yeah, sure"
In no time he pulls up in the center of the city in the club you'd all discussed going too.
"Thank you, I owe you lunch or dinner or something for this" you say tears still running down your face.
"Y/N are you sure your okay?" he asks, and you simply nod before hopping out the car. You run over to the VIP entrance and hold up your ID to the man, he checks the list nodding and letting the rope down so you could go through. Your walk round the club, the loud music pounding in your ears as you look for your boyfriend.
You lock eyes with Lily and Oscar first and they rush over to you, asking where you've been.
"Where's Lando, I just want to speak with him" you sob, leaning into Lily's comforting hug, sniveling and wiping it with the hoodie cuff. Oscar guides you round to a booth that currently occupied, Max, Kelly, Other Max, Pietra, Daniel, Heidi, Lando and a few others. As you round the corner everyone notices Oscar's sudden appearance and then yours behind him.
"Lando, mate look who i found!" Oscar tries grabbing his attention but he's one of the only people at the table right now that hasn't got your attention.
"Oh... yeah cool, ill be there in a min" he says noticing it you but not taking anything in, you look over at Oscar tears welling in your eyes just wanting a reassuring hug from your boyfriend and for him to either help you calm down, or take you back to the hotel.
"L-lando?" you stutter, and everyone is looking at you in confusion having no clue what had happened.
"What Y/N, I'm trying to celebrate with my friends that actually bother to turn up..." he huffs, everyone had noticed that he had a semi sour mood tonight, and now they had started to understand why.
"Mate, look lets take this to the balcony!" Max says, taking Pietra's hand trying to get her to stand up so he can let the girl whose sat next to Lando and the boy himself out. He noticed the tear stains down your face even in the dim-lighting of the club the minute you came over, him and Pietra having shared a look.
"Nope, if she's got something to say, she can say it here..." he grins, even though he doesn't normally drink, he'd had to many drinks tonight and it was effecting him.
"Lando, you don't want to do this" Oscar, tries stepping next to you, making Lando scoff.
"Oscar's right mate. Not tonight" Max agree's.
"She's a big girl, come on Y/N tell me why you cant even be bothered to fucking celebrate with me? Huh? You know what your so fucking useless and I shouldn't have thought you'd care for something as big as this for me... your jealous...." he slurs his words.
"Fuck you Lando. Just... I hate you" you cry, everyone at the table stiffens as your mouth opens like a fish, as if you want to say something more.
"I'm done, We're done, I'm not coming home to Monaco, I'm going back to London" you add, before turning round and storming out the club. Out the front you found a sober, Alex getting George and Pierre into Charles car, while he got Lily in his own.
"Alex!" you exclaim running over to him, he see's you and waves before pulling you into a hug.
"Can you drop me to the hotel please?" you ask and he nods.
The minute you got back to the hotel, you locked the main door before entering the bathroom and scrubbing your body raw. You looked at your sleepwear options, you normally just slept in Lando's older tops... but of course you didn't want the thought, sight or smell of him anywhere near you right now.
You fell asleep pretty quickly considering what happened. Lando didn't disturb you, you assumed he went back with one of his friends and slept on their floor or sofa.
You got up early, wanting to get the earliest flight back to London that you could. You were packing up when a knock came from the door, and then the sound of a key card swiping before the door opened.
"Morning baby, how are you?" a voice asks that you didn't want to hear. You keep going on about your packing, leaving Lando's stuff alone.
"Getting an early start to head back home huh?" he tries again, Lando looked at you, with concern on his face. He hadn't spoken to Carlos before he left wanting to come straight to his girlfriend who he was confused as to why he didnt wake up in their room with her.
"Ah your a grouchy morning person, why don't we go back to bed for a little" he laughs, about to touch your shoulder to pull you up before you shrug him off.
"Don't touch me" you whisper, zipping your suitcase up.
"What's going on with you baby!" he asks, pulling your chin up so your eyes met his and he almost gasped in shock when he saw the tears streaming down her face.
"I'm guessing you don't remember much of last night?" you say trying not to sound angry.
"No, I think Charles and Pierre had me do shots straight away" he laughs a little before turning back seriously.
"Why?" he asks.
"Well considering I broke up with you last night ..." you glare looking at him before he stumbles back a little from the pure shock of the statement. He was about to ask if you were joking, nut seeing your face there was no joke there.
"What? Baby... no what happened?" he asks looking at you. You snivel and lean for a tissue to wipe your nose.
"Figure it out, because i need some space right now... you hurt me Lando... and I need time. This isn't the end I just need to think" you say, pulling your suitcase up before walking to the door.
"Please baby, lets just talk about this. I don't even know what i did..." he argues throwing his hands out.
"No... because you hurt me! And you need to apologize for everything said!" you say tears in your eyes.
"Maybe talk to Oscar, Max and those Mclaren Mechanics that stay late" you sigh walking out the door leaving a shell shocked Lando behind.
A/N: I'm so so so sorry, i need to write more fluff instead of all these angst pieces... and some smut i gotta delve into smut coz I'm a pretty decent spicy writer... so look out for that too.
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