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#but oh well poverty will do that
yellowocaballero · 4 months
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i dont know if this something you put a lot of thought into but it seems like you might and im curious so, what are some of your favorite themes to write about/the themes that interest you in writing or media?
Oh wow, good question. I put both a lot of thought and very little into the themes of my work. I always sit down and decide what I'm saying, and the meaning of the story, but some things always emerge in the writing. I usually discover what a story is actually about as I'm writing it. It's usually only after I finish the work that I realize what themes I had put in there, which seems like it should be bad. I think this means that a lot of my themes come through subconsciously. They're typically just...things I think about a lot.
I think the one thing I keep on coming back to is *tumblr voice* the mortifying ordeal of being known. That entire article, including the image of walking down a hundred stories of hell before reaching heaven, reconfigured my brain. It's just so damn hard to exist in a world with other people in it. There's an inevitability to hurting each other, but the love's worth it. Playing The World Ends With You at a vulnerable age primed me for obsession with this. That one quote from The Little Prince, ya know.
Generational trauma, cycles of trauma and abuse, and the long-term impact of trauma comes up a lot for me too. How being fucked up makes you fuck up others, the long-term consequences of being fucked up, the coping mechanisms we develop as a result. The ugly side of trauma and mental illness, the way we lash out and hurt people. I talk about escapism a lot, and the impact that has on you and the people around you long-term. This is usually exemplified through amnesia plotlines. This is a deep cut, but the Warchild series by Karin Lowachee had the best take on this I've read in a book.
Non-traditional love. I end up writing a lot of sibling dynamics, but I like creating unnamable and undefinable relationships. A lot of things I write just become very aro and asexual narratives. Love that saves. Love that isn't enough, but it still matters. The other side of love, which is grief.
I could go on. Forgiving yourself. Struggling to determine how to be a good person. How your identity & the intersections of your identity affect who you are. Power and power dynamics. A LOT of man vs self stories, like a lot a lot (I'm not overly interested by villains). The experience of being mentally ill and navigating the world as a mentally ill and/or disabled person. The differences between navigating the world as a man or a woman. I write a lot, so a lot of stuff tends to come up, lol. Roleswaps - fucking, somehow, for some reason, WHY, WHY DO I WRITE SO MUCH OF THEM -
Thanks for the ask, I had to do some self-reflection to answer it! I never really realize I'm writing about these things until I am, again. They're just all part of my framework of how I understand the world. Everybody has those, but when you're a writer it's easier to pull them out and microscope them.
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meirimerens · 1 year
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thinking about how mishandled the herb brides are because like. The Text tells us they're not sexual beings (P1 mentions them being virgins, engaged to the Earth, and not to be touched even by their husbands, almost, for a lack of a better word and to conjure an image more than anything, priestess-types) and that their dances are nonsexual and sacred (all all true and correct) WHILE. giving them detailed / 3D modeled nipples. topless. clothes very conveniently torn [in ways that would be unrealistic for actual dancing like in the fucking moshpit]. all pretty thin hairless white-passing blemishless 20-something women. being already sexualized as white-passing asian women, but if they looked more like other NPC models/members of the Kin like the Kayura models (which to me would make more sense because they are never mentioned to be mixed in the way Artemy, an indigenous man who's blonde blue eyes due to being mixed, is [while still very much being indigenous and it being a central part of his story]), it would be even more obvious and would steer even more into Very Blatant fetishization of asian women. and then one asks, are they white-passing because they're sexualized? are they sexualized because they're white-passing? was it an admission of guilt to not make them look like Kayura model, because it would be too obvious then? or is it an admission of lust for women more white-passing? is it about beauty in the eye of the beholder?
then there's bewildering and dehumanizing lore of members of the Kin being non-humans, through the existence of the Worms (literally half-soil), them being a (more or less literal) hivemind, and that being "less human"/closer to the earth (nice_dichotomy_what_lies_outside_of_it png but also... the game touches on that...) immunizes them to the Earth's disease... and yet the Brides look like women... pretty thin hairless white-passing blemishless 20-something women who someone found wise to give 3d modeled nipples to, still good for the ritual cutting... do you hear how i'm going mad yet...
edit to add because while i was so mad and it WAS in my mind i just didn't have the strength to add it when i first wrote:
and they're bought and traded between the odonghs they pair with (again, closer to cattle or things) ... ladies there's so much. there's too much.
#werewolf tearing shirt off again#ah well. [lets myself drift away in the images i've made of the brides and my constant quest to humanize them and respect them and#make them diverse and full of life. which i might never manage to and yet i try.]#also i was thinking like. their celibacy + virginity + central spiritual place in the kin do be reminding me a lot of priestesses#[really sorry for boxing them in like that but if there is stuff of the same thing just with another name imagine i used it here#i just don't know any other]#and priestesshood famously was an option for women to avoid marriage; and often domestic/sexual servitude to their husbands#same for nuns who are also said to be like. ''engaged to christ'' in their own way (again only making tangentially similar patterns;#not calling the Brides nuns of course)#so having them be Said to be nonsexual [until they're said to be etc] while being Shown as sexualized it's like. oooh the misery#neigh (blabbers)#disclaimer i'm white & i'm sure Many indigenous women regardless of origins have touched on this in more direct and deeper ways i ever coul#oh there's also the fact that the kin is said in design document to mirror in ways 19th century native americans#and the herb brides going to sexualize themselves in the B.H. ''for outsiders'' (p1 dialogues)#mirrors native american women being pushed in brothels from the crushing roller of colonization stripping them of land#pushing them into poverty and homelessness#in ways that i um. raised eyebrow emoji to say the least. find deeply uncomfortable.
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martyrbat · 1 year
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writing for the first time (beyond ‘yes, and’ing sessions in dms) in over a year and the first time since i been sober is just a constant saga of alternating, intense feelings. realizing how much i missed writing to shame of my limited vocabulary and writing ability. the excitement to start again and grow to the remorse of how much i used to write confidently and somewhat decently. having a forced acceptance that i have to start over and relearn how to have this passion and interest without it crushing my heart and confidence at every second while actively having my heart crushed and pretending that its not so i can work through it. the amazement at the old giddy feelings tetuning to the fear that all my creativity and drive came from these hard substances i abused for years instead of something im capable of by myself. then rewording a sentence 5 times and smiling because i like how i phrased something finally and have the feeling of pride swelling up in my chest to once again the sudden guilt and shame over my own feelings and past that seems to overcome my entire senses.
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cruelsister-moved2 · 1 year
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what you eat has an impact on the environment thats just a fact. how u choose to mitigate that might be trying to use locally sourced produce, it might be growing your own, it might be reducing meat intake, it might be supporting community food initiatives, it might just be buying un-packaged produce or avoiding out-of-season fruit, or maybe ur not in a position to do anything. but stop fucking listening to people who tell you that the other regular people who choose to do a different thing from this list than you do are the enemy to distract you from who’s really creating the problem. if you spend more time railing at vegans than you do at monsanto and cargill and ADM then you’re literally falling into the same trap as someone who makes 40k and complains about the minimum wage being increased
#a lot of u guys are straight up brainwashed and think its really leftist somehow who else cringed#DISCLAIMER this is not to say white vegans dont do stupid racist things#but to argue that white vegans are not more racist as a group than like other white people#like. have the same reaction when indigenous land is taken over for animal agriculture#i think its very weird and sad to make it a competition rather than recognising corporate food production as the shared proble#and if u actually care abt farmers then get mad at john deere lol#i cant stand the either/or thing w vegetarianism/veganism#when someones like oh ur vegetarian to mitigate the impact on the environment?? ummm what about [vegetable that can be farmed unethically]??#girl do you not fucking eat vegetables??get help#also so many of them are just not true like the quinoa thing is sooo annoying because its not true#no one even knows exactly what they think is wrong with quinoa theyre just lke umm isnt it bad#actually one of the biggest concerns quinoa farmers have is that the fad won't last and then they'll be plunged into poverty#and the soy thing everyone repeats okay well again. vegans arent responsible for the majority of soy consumption but also#consumption literally accounts for like 5% of soy production#most of it is for ANIMAL FEED and biofuels.#the same applies to like vegans who get mad at people who buy locally sourced meat etc etc but tahts not what i see on this website#i mean anyone whos getting mad at regular ppl over literally trying to do something good for the environment is an idiot
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quillandrapier · 10 months
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Me: I'm going to stop sad posting, I hate to have people see me that way and I like bringing joy to others
Me not five minutes later: I might be made to love but not be loved
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karmaphone · 1 year
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screams my stepdad and my moms boss both believe people trapped in poverty choose to be poor
#I'm not saying your experience with '''welfare queens''' didn't happen but people STUCK in poverty are STUCK there for a reason#my moms boss (whit guy married to a black lady) also said some shit about how the biggest problem with th black community is lack of fathers#like no baby I think it's the racism built into the fuckin system#just look at redlining#or the crack epidemic#like. WHAT is taking the fathers away. where are they GOING. oh right. they got labeled criminals and thrown in jail#which you didn't even want to acknowledge has a structural racism problem as well#but like. just because someone you know managed the impossible feat of dragging themselves out of poverty doesn't mean that everyone can or#has the OPPORTUNITY to. he didn't even try to refute my points about disability and not being able to save he was just like 'yeah they DO#treat disabled people and vets really really poorly' like cool ignore how that relates to the greater discussion of poverty esp as it#relates to other personal situations like disability or racism. like the way poor brown men are lured into the military and thrown away. or#the way that disabled black people are way less likely to get approved for benefits#like. ignore the larger implications that I'm making in favor of like. 'well my wife is black so I clearly have more of a say here than you'#like what a shitty white move to pull 'muh muh I have a leg up in this discussion because of my black friend/wife/whatever I win!!!'#just because a tiny fraction of the population on welfare choose to stay on it and actively dissuade attempts to get them off of it doesn't#mean that the vast majority of people on it for years aren't on it because they HAVE to be
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quilliums · 6 months
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U alive?
Eh kinda. I think I've been on tumblr maybe a handful of times in the last two or so months and I'll favorite a few things then leave again. To be real with you? It's all so fucking fake and empty to me anymore.
I very quickly got more done then I can put into words with pretty much everyone I follow and everyone who follows me and all of tumblr.
It's not going to sound good because I'm not going to sugar coat this or walk it back because that'll be useless. Everyone is just going to twist whatever I say at this point so here it is:
It is very telling that when I, a trans man, reblogged posts (and directly asked mutuals) to literally do nothing and not spend money on the new IPs that came out this year that actively use that money to harm trans people I was told to mind my business. That their personal blogs and spending habits have no impact on trans people and that my request to literally do nothing instead of spending money, again to DO NOTHING, to help trans people was unreasonable. But. But that's fine what ever. I'll just mind my business I guess and only reblog helpful stuff, positivity, and fandom. That's cool we'll all stay in our corners and that'll be the end of it. Nah tho. Because when I do nothing, when I don't want my blog, the one the very same people said shouldn't be concerned with suffering, taken over by literal live footage of children dieing and some of the most horrific things some how I'm actively participating in genocide.
When others actually participate in my suffering the request to do nothing is too much and how dare anyone even imply that makes them a participant in trans deaths. When I do nothing, on a god damn tumblr blog let's remember the stakes here and the difference between literally giving money to fund transphobia and me simply not reblogging something, in the face of others suffering I'm automatically an antisemitic hate mongering participant in a genocide.
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nomaishuttle · 9 months
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ordered sonic.... yay
#11 dollar order judt a footlong coney and medium tater tots. Paying 18 dollars for it 😭😭😭😭#+5 dollar tip#sighhh. oh well worth it for delicious chilidog reward guys im so excitef#i dont even particularly want a coney i just rly rly rly want a chilidog. and a coney is technically a chilidog#ideally id just have my girlfriend hormel hot dog chili my other girlfriend oscar meyer hotdog my other girlfriend great value cheddar and#my fourth girlfriend white bread. but country girls make do.#my best hotdog tip btw for you dogheads out there. looking at you anubis#AWESOME JOKE! the crowd went wild. snyways the tip is to cut it in half b4 u microwave it.....#or like however yr cooking hot dogs ive had them every which way. microwave is most convenient boiled makes me nostalgic grilled#also makes me nostalgic but for more idealized nostalgia. boiled hot dogs r nostalgia 4 the like. being in poverty Not that im a povertyfan#LOL. and not that only poor ppl... boil hot dogs just like idk it was a very cheap meal Boiled hot dogs and great value white bread and#great value cheddar and hormel chili. exceedingly cheap. and Most of my comfort foods r that way#shoutout to keilbasa and potatoes shoutout to keilbasa and mac n cheese SHOUTOUT TUNEY MAC MVP MVP MVP NUMBER ONE TUNEY MAC#one thing abt poor ppl foods is that if u have a meat you can just put that shit in mac n cheese and thats a meal.#not just poor ppl i think everybody should just be likr Fugg ittt can of tuna in the mac n cheese. sry guys im like tuney macs number one#advocate. im so tired of being told its gross or weird lol. sry. everybody go eat tuney mac NOW !!!!#but yes anyway#i love the cheesedogs yk the ones with the cheese in them.. and those ones i alwaysss cut them open even tho i ate those eith no toppings a#lot. it just gets them likee. yummy idk man..#and obvi its convenient 4 toppings and stuff. not oarticularly cheese but chili? brother you need to make a bowl for all of that or you#wont grt optimal chili spreadage.#my other hot dog tip is 1. go to steak n shake 2. order steak frank 3. cheddar cheese cup on the side 4. with fries 5. get the likee#seasoning whatever idk i stole an entire thing of it. hut its just at your tables or you caj pay 13 dollars#but rly its incredibly easy t hust steal it and its yummy LOL. you put that on the fries#you put the cheese on the frank hust pour it#its liquid cheddar yk. yumm#then you put fries on the frank too. and any leftover cheddar you dip the fries that arent on the frank jn that#This is my birthday meal ive had it every single birthday for the past like 10 years Except for 2021 I Dont Particularly Want To Talk About#My 2021 Birthday. HAPPY SWEET 16 TO ME !#well actually i do want 2 talk abt it bc its sad 💔 bc of covid and the like steak n shake was closed EVEN FOR DRIVE THRU and it was lik
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deadsetobsessions · 3 months
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Alley Drunk!Danny AU- Part 3
[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.4]
“Have you considered anger management classes?”
The Batman turned sharply, cape flaring out as he raised his weary fists in preparation for another fight. Only to pause, as he caught sight of a bedraggled man leaning against the pockmarked, water worn, Gotham variety stone of the abandoned post office. Non-hostile. Scent of booze, not strong enough to be fresh, but prominent enough for him to clock the stranger as a habitual drinker. Young. Sympathy softened Batman’s stance. Still, Batman kept his guard up. Good thing Robin was benched, he was off his game today if he hadn’t noticed the young man.
“Nevermind. You run around as a bat. Clearly anger management classes aren’t on your to do list.”
“What do you want.”
He’s young. Not as young as Robin, but… enough that it made Batman gentle his approach. The young man pushed away from his spot, fearlessly slouching towards him. Casual. Unafraid. How curious. Even Gothamites were wary around him, correctly assuming and witnessing his takedowns of Gotham’s Underbelly.
“You do this a lot, don’t you?” The bedraggled young man asked, head tilted neutrally at the bodies strewn around the Batman.
“Hm.”
“Why do you never swing by Crime Alley?”
Batman’s guard faltered at the blunt question, but he regained it quickly.
“I do.”
“You don’t.” The man disagreed amiably. He reached down towards the victims but Batman grabbed his arm in an iron hold before he could rifle through their belongings. The young man laughed and pulled back agreeably. “Is it classism, why you avoid us? The poor isn’t good enough to deserve protection from Gotham’s knight?”
“No. I do this for Gotham. All of Gotham.”
“…Well, there’s always room for improvement, I guess?”
The stranger pulled back and broke Batman’s hold, which had the vigilante sharply focusing onto the man. The stranger was strong, despite how skinny and starved he looked. Few people could casually break his hold and tonight, he added one more to the tally.
“You should tell your sponsor to look into creating job opportunities in Crime Alley. The problem isn’t actually the crooks,” the man told the vigilante, gesturing around them. “That’s just the symptoms. The actual problem is the poverty.”
“I know.”
“And yet, you still avoid Crime Alley.”
“Who are you.”
The man began walking away, throwing a dry “The Crime Alley Drunk, apparently,” behind his shoulder. When Batman took to the roofs to track him, the man had thoroughly slipped away.
“Agent A, did you catch that?”
“Yes, Batman. It appears you’ve gotten the wool pulled over your cowl by a rather mysterious youngster.”
Batman heard a younger snort of laughter. Robin. Who was supposed to be doing homework.
“Please stop making fun of me.” Batman sighed half heartedly.
“Not on your life, B.” Robin chirped.
——
“Ya talked ta Batman?!” Jason crowed at him, excited. Danny had done as promised and met him at the chili dog stand at the correct time, which increased his credibility in Jason’s eyes.
“Sure did. He knocked out like, five guys by himself. It was pretty cool.”
“Fuckin’ woah.”
“Right?” Danny smiled tiredly at the kid. He stayed up all night to pull his shit together, and outright bought an apartment for them to stay in. That safe had a lot of cash, after all. “Come on, kid. We’re heading back to base but before that, we gotta pick up a few things.”
“Like what?” Jason asked suspiciously.
“Like curtains in the color you like, groceries, and blankets and bedding, and general cleaning stuff.” Danny ticked off a finger per item.
“We killin’ someone?”
“What? No!”
“Ya said general cleaning stuff!” Jason defended himself. The raggedy kid peered at Danny cautiously, and brightened when Danny only snorted in amusement.
“Oh my ancients, you Gothamites. No, those are for like, actual cleaning. You know, for the apartment I just got you.”
Danny missed the burn of booze, but when Jason looked at him like the child he’s supposed to be had Gotham’s streets never laid its claim on him, Danny didn’t want to fail the kid.
Even if the kid thought he was buying chemicals to clean up a body. He’s the son of two mad scientists, he knows how to get rid of a body, obviously. As if he’d need chemicals to begin with, honestly. His ghost powers are quite versatile.
“An apartment?”
“Yep. It’s shitty, but it’s got all the utilities and I kind of miss having warm water to shower with.”
Jason straightened and trotted alongside the Alley Drunk with a little more purpose. People avoided them. Danny lead the kid to the apartment, handing him a key and letting him explore the sparsely decorated place.
“So, first thing’s first. You go shower. Then, we’ll go shopping for clothes, register you for school, get your school supplies, and grab some lunch. Not necessarily in that order, but ya know. And cleaning supplies.” Danny grinned.
Jason whipped his head around from where he was closely inspecting the windows for insulation- like Danny would let the actual kid live somewhere with drafty windows- and spluttered. Hope, fear, uncertainty battled across Jason’s face as he tried to say something. Danny watched Jason open and close his mouth several times before he finally managed to whisper something.
“I- I c’n go to school?”
“Yes. You are, in fact, legally required to do so, Jason.”
A pause as the kid grapples with the idea, of something he didn’t think he’d ever get to do. A grin bloomed over his face as he realized Danny’s sincerity.
“Then what are we waitin’ for?!”
“For you to shower. C’mon grubby, the shower’s that way. Towels are in the cabinet, and there’s some extra clothes in here,” Danny tossed Jason the plastic bag of clean kid’s clothes he bought from Gotham’s version of Walmart, a store that somehow had the energy of a Tesco and a Denny’s parking lot.
“Fuc- I mean- yeah! On it!”
——
Clearing out the drafts- feel free to continue ^^
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astrow1zar6 · 4 months
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Astro observations of people who had to grow up too soon- 24
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Scorpio moons: they usually come from a very intense household and tend to have a very intense relationship with the mother. I’ve seen in a lot of cases Scorpio moon mothers really end up betraying their trust in one way or another which can be the start of their trust issues. Everyone I met with this placement was exposed to a lot of crazy shit early that forced them to grow up earlier then they’d like. The mother is usually very manipulative and smothering. Which is a big reason why they become so secretive. I’ve also seen a lot were shamed for their sensitive natures from a very young age which caused them to have such a nonchalant emotionless exterior.
Cap moons and rising: oh boy, these people are the ones who definitely raised themselves. Could’ve even help raise their own parents as well.. I notice cap moons and risings are always put with extremely immature irresponsible parents (especially the mother) most people with these placements are the eldest child and had to look over their siblings. And if they aren’t the eldest they probably still had to take on the role and responsibilities of the oldest child. I’ve also noticed that their dads tend to be assent from their lives for a period of time. Whether they want to or not they are always put in the position of the provider and breadwinner for their families. This exposure caused them to be wise beyond their years. They also usually grow up in poverty or in very poor conditions.
Saturn in 4th house: my heart goes out to these folks. Your household was probably very cold and unloving. Especially on your mothers side. Usually the mothers go thru a lot of mental stuff while raising them that causes them to be very un nurturing and cold towards the child. These people normally grow up believing that they are hard to love because of this☹️ family could be very avoidant of emotions causing the native to become very avoidant in their future relationships. As cold and sad as their home life normally is it’s usually difficult for these people to escape their homes.. they almost feel like they have this huge weight to keep their families afloat which can cause a lot of distress. Their childhoods felt more like being in a prison.
12th house placements/stellium: these people are usually rejected from their social circles early on in life. These are usually the kids that are picked last for activities in school or that kid everyone talks over when they have something important to say (ESPECIALLY mercury in 12th house) these people were treated as wallflowers a lot by their peers and families. This isolation caused extreme loneliness from a very young age. People are always making assumptions about them that are so far from the truth, this can cause them to feel like no one will be able to understand them. The rejection they suffered early caused them to become so empathetic towards others it’s amazing how emotionally intelligent these people can be.
Pisces mars: these people I notice can be big victims of bullying.These people have trouble asserting themselves normally (unless you have a lot of fire in your chart) which can cause them to attract bullies. Their sensitive nature is usually seen as weakness to more stronger types so they usually become a big target to many. People just really enjoy letting their anger out on them because they believe they won’t do anything & sometimes it’s true.. y’all need to learn how to stand up for yourselves!! Being passive will not make it go away!
Scorpio suns: I notice most Scorpio suns end up being the black sheep of their families. Usually their born with a completely different personality from the rest of the family or completely different morals. Whatever it may be they usually have something very different about them that causes a division between them and their families. Scorpios are usually that cousin that shows up to social events once in a blue moon that no one really knows anything about or what’s going on in their life. Even in other social situations they can be seen as the black sheep, always saying really out of pocket taboo stuff that makes people distance themselves. They are very authentic people and I believe people get rubbed the wrong way by that. That they can’t tame these people.
Lilith conjunct the asc: speaking of people that other feel need to be tamed here comes the queen of outcasts. I’ve only met women with this placement so I’ll speak on the women I’ve known. They are usually people that grow up with less shame than most, they grow up so naturally authentic it scares people. It is very hard to shame these people which is why I believe so many people try to shame them. They have such a powerful aura that it can be a big threat to people. So it usually results in people (mostly women or feminine energies) outcasting them from social situations or trying to make them feel insecure or acting out of jealousy. They attract soooo much jealousy it’s insane. These people whoever can attract the opposite sex like a moth to a flame which is why I believe many women get so mad.. like how can she attract so many people being so wild??? their raw energy is their superpower. However although they attract the opposite sex with no effort their dating life is anything but easy. I notice they are usually always in third party situations or the men they date never really want to commit to them:( this causes them to be independent very early because they believe they can’t trust others or people just want them for their intent.
I apologize for my late posts depression has been kicking my but lately but planning to get back to my daily posts per usual 🥰
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inkskinned · 1 year
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one of the things that i think we should pay attention to, socially, about the disney v. desantis thing is that it is really highlighting the importance of remembering nuance.
in a purely neutral sense, if you engage in something problematic, that does not mean you are necessarily agreeing with what makes it problematic. and i am worried that we have become... so afraid of any form of nuance.
disney isn't my friend, they're a corporate monopoly that bastardized copyright laws for their own benefit, ruin the environment, and abuse their workers (... and many other things). this isn't a hypothetical for me - i grew up in florida. i also worked for the actual Walt Disney World; like, in the parks. i am keenly aware of the ways they hurt people, because they hurt me. i fully believe that part of the reason florida is so conservative is because it's been an "open secret" for years now that disney lobbies the government to keep minimum wage down, and i know they worked hard to keep the parks unmasked and open during the worst parts of Covid. they purposefully keep their employees in poverty. they are in part responsible for the way the floridian government works.
desantis is still, by a margin that is frankly daunting, way worse. the alternative here isn't just "republicans win", it's actual fascism.
in a case like this, where the alternative is to allow actual fascism into united states legislation - where, if desantis wins, there are huge and legal ramifications - it's tempting to minimize the harm disney is also doing, because... well, it's not fascism. but disney isn't the good guy, either, which means republicans are having a field day asking activists oh, so you think their treatment of their employees is okay?
we have been trained there is a right answer. you're right! you're in the good group, and you're winning at having an opinion.
except i have the Internet Prophecy that in 2-3 months, even left-wing people will be ripping apart activists for having "taken disney's side". aren't i an anti-capitalist? aren't i pro-union? aren't i one of the good ones? removed from context and nuance (that in this particular situation i am forced to side with disney, until an other option reveals itself), my act of being like "i hope they have goofy rip his throat out onstage, shaking his lifeless body like a dog toy" - how quickly does that seem like i actually do support disney?
and what about you! at home, reading this. are you experiencing the Thought Crime of... actually liking some of the things disney has made? your memories of days at the parks, or of good movies, or of your favorite show growing up. maybe you are also evil, if you ever enjoyed anything, ever, at all.
to some degree, the binary idealization/vilification of individual motive and meaning already exists in the desantis case. i have seen people saying not to go to the disney pride events because they're cash grabs (they are). i've seen people saying you have to go because they're a way to protest. there isn't a lot of internet understanding of nuance. instead it's just "good show of support" or "evil bootlicking."
this binary understanding is how you can become radicalized. when we fear nuance and disorder, we're allowing ourselves the safety of assuming that the world must exist in binary - good or bad, problematic or "not" problematic. and unfortunately, bigots want you to see the world in this binary ideal. they want you to get mad at me because "disney is taking a risk for our community but you won't sing their praises" and they want me to get mad at you for not respecting the legit personal trauma that disney forced me through.
in a grander scheme outside of disney: what happens is a horrific splintering within activist groups. we bicker with each other about minimal-harm minimal-impact ideologies, like which depiction of bisexuality is the most-true. we gratuitously analyze the personal lives of activists for any sign they might be "problematic". we get spooked because someone was in a dog collar at pride. we wring our hands about setting an empty shopping mall on fire. we tell each other what words we may identify ourselves by. we get fuckin steven universe disk horse when in reality it is a waste of our collective time.
the bigots want you to spend all your time focusing on how pristine and pretty you and your interests are. they want us at each other's throats instead of hand in hand. they want to say see? nothing is ever fucking good enough for these people.
and they want their followers to think in binary as well - a binary that's much easier to follow. see, in our spaces, we attack each other over "proper" behavior. but in bigoted groups? they attack outwards. they have someone they hate, and it is us. they hate you, specifically, and you are why they have problems - not the other people in their group. and that's a part of how they fucking keep winning.
some of the things that are beloved to you have a backbone in something terrible. the music industry is a wasteland. the publishing industry is a bastion of white supremacy. video games run off of unpaid labor and abuse.
the point of activism was always to bring to light that abuse and try to stop it from happening, not to condemn those who engage in the content that comes from those industries. "there is no ethical consumption under late capitalism" also applies to media. your childhood (and maybe current!) love of the little mermaid isn't something you should now flinch from, worried you'll be a "disney adult". wanting the music industry to change for the better does not require that you reject all popular music until that change occurs. you can acknowledge the harm something might cause - and celebrate the love that it has brought into your life.
we must detach an acknowledgment of nuance from a sense of shame and disgust. we must. punishing individual people for their harmless passions is not doing good work. encouraging more thoughtful, empathetic consumption does not mean people should feel ashamed of their basic human capacities and desires. it should never have even been about the individual when the corporation is so obviously the actual evil. this sense that we must live in shame and dread of our personal nuances - it just makes people bitter and hopeless. do you have any idea how scared i am to post this? to just acknowledge the idea of nuance? that i might like something nuanced, and engage in it joyfully? and, at the same time, that i'm brutally aware of the harm that they're doing?
"so what do i do?" ... well, often there isn't a right answer. i mean in this case, i hope mickey chops off ron's head and then does a little giggle. but truth be told, often our opinions on nuanced subjects will differ. you might be able to engage in things that i can't because the nuance doesn't sit right with me. i might think taylor swift is a great performer and a lot of fun, and you might be like "raquel, the jet fuel emissions". we are both correct; neither of us have any actual sway in this. and i think it's important to remember that - the actual scope of individual responsibility. like, i also love going to the parks. Thunder Mountain is so fun. you (just a person) are not responsible for the harm that Disney (the billion dollar corporation) caused me. i don't know. i think it's possible to both enjoy your memories and interrogate the current state of their employment policies.
there is no right way to interrogate or engage with nuance - i just hope you embrace it readily.
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ritcchamadayo · 1 year
Text
a little self-indulgent, but-
Meeting the Family! Ft. TWST Beastmen / Mermen
[headcanons / imagines]
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TWST's Beastmen / Mermen x Reader ;
For the Winter Holidays, you were invited by your boyfriend to visit them at home! You happily accept, but you never know what happens when going to a non-human gathering...
(this is mostly going by my own personal hcs and whatever little tidbits TWST had given us about their families ;;;; TWST please do a family reveal..)
Beastmen
Kingscholar Royal Family
Cue Cheka running towards you in full speed :
Cheka already accepted you as his older sibling since you met on Campus!! He's happy someone's taking care of his Oji-tan at school and helping Ruggie out!
Falena on the other hand is a bit of a wild card. You'd be surprised, who knew the King of Sunset Savanna was so... carefree? He treats you really well as the King and as Leona's brother, and all around just really excited. Sibling-in-law soon i hope~? He'd jump around in joy upon meeting you!
Leona and Falena both had the utmost respect for the Savanna's females and Falena's wife, Leona's Sister-in-law, stood quite high in that hierarchy.. needless to say, she's a really well-respected queen within the kingdom and very responsible. But you seem to have piqued her interest, and she's warming up to you quickly! She'd hold herself back from trying to groom you like she would with Cheka, Falena, or Leona sometimes!
Leona would definitely try to swat away his family from bothering you too much just because they're interested. When else does your Prince, Younger Brother to the King himself, bring back a potential mate?
Cheka would love cuddling up to you! Leona would forcefully pull Cheka away because he also wants to cuddle up to you- but hey, you could take a nap surrounded by warm lion beastmen so you don't need to worry about getting cold!
Bucchi Family
Ruggie's grandma adores you!!! She's so happy to see that her dear Ruggie has found someone who'd look after him and feed him!! She'd prepare Ruggie's favorite donuts upon knowing he's coming back with you, and would definitely try to make you eat as much as possible. She loves her grandchildren, and even though living in poverty, she'd do anything to make you and Ruggie happy.
The kids in the neighborhood though, oh boy. At first they'd be all pouty and angry at you, sometimes sending a snarl or a growl your way. But Ruggie stepped in, and you realize that they just didn't want anyone to take away their big bro away!
It's easy enough to get them to warm up to you though! If you brought along plenty of treats for them, they'd flock around you and would be on their best behavior. Good food, good life. Even just a little candy would get them happy!
Bucchi-grandma would definitely remind you to not give them (or Ruggie) too much sugar. You don't want them to go bonkers on sugar rush.. that would destroy the entire place! Ruggie's more responsible now, but you cant help but wonder how he'd look like on a sugar rush when he was small.
Bucchi-grandma adores when you help out with the chores. She gets tired quite fast doing chores every day, but with Ruggie and you helping out, she could finally sit back and relax. And she's so grateful to you!
Howl Family
Jack's pack is definitely an active bunch. Jack's father, would definitely be on high alert. He doesn't want anybody hurting his pup, even though he's all grown up. And moreover, he doesn't want the newcomer to break apart the pack Jack's grandparents had established together in the Shaftlands.
They're definitely a teensy bit territorial, but it only extends to the area around their house. Jack's grandparents, the leaders of the pack, doesn't necessarily bother their children's affairs much but they'd want someone who could blend into the pack and form a relationship as close as family with the rest of the pack!
Jack's mom was wary too at first, but she'd be the one to warm up to you faster and start coaxing her husband to let his guard down. "Jack's brought home a good pup dear, maybe you should give them a chance. He's all grown up now, and it won't be long until he makes his own pack."
Jack's dad would warm up to you after that. He's a little awkward on showing his emotions (which his wife had laughed at) but he's trying his best!! Congrats! Howl-papa now accepts you as Jack's mate! (though Jack may have a few words to say regarding them calling you his mate already... man's just embarrassed.)
Oh Jack's younger siblings love having you around! They'd be shy and hide behind their mother at first, but when Jack called them over to meet and introduce you, you'd find that they're such sweet kids! It'll take a while for them to get fully comfortable but don't worry, with Jack by your side, they'll come around!
Mermen
Ashengrotto Family
Ashengrotto-mama loves your company! The first thing you see as you enter Azul's house was this badass lady using all 10 of her limbs to cook up a storm! She even freed a few limbs to give you a little greeting hug!
Ashengrotto-papa doesn't show his enthusiasm as much as his wife, but he greeted you properly nonetheless. While Ashengrotto-mama is the businesswoman of the family, Ashengrotto-papa was the one knowledgeable of laws. No wonder Azul made himself a successful business! (All the while avoiding crimes with his shady activities...)
Ashengrotto-mama would definitely fall for you too when you help her with cooking or compliment her dishes. Despite running a restaurant under the sea, she's very knowledgeable about cooking for humans and her dishes were stellar, you can't help but fall for her too.
At first they were surprised to hear from Azul that he had found a human partner, but after seeing how you acted lovingly around him in his octo-mer form and all in all simply loving him for who he is, his parents were glad. Azul may have had a hard time back in the days about his body, but he's been getting the confidence boost he needed from you and that's all the Ashengrottos could ever wish for!
Ashengrotto-papa would be the one holding in the emotional tears, he's so happy that his son found someone who loves him just the way Azul is. Considering this is Ashengrotto-mama's second marriage as well, and her original husband was nowhere to be found as Azul was growing up, he's simply glad Azul found someone and that his love life was far smoother than Ashengrotto-papa's or Ashengrotto-mama's. He's grown up into a fine young man with you by his side.
Ashengrotto-grandma simply watches on fondly, she loves seeing her grandchild happy <3
Leech Family
The first time you met them, oh boy, you might have mistook them for some sort of mafia family. I swear they're not!!!!! They're just a normal family!!!!!! The sharp-teethed smirk scared you at first, but hey, you've spent a while with literal twins with the same traits. You'll survive, right?
Their parents definitely bet on who's gonna find a partner first
You could find so many similarities between the pair of eel-mers with their two sons! Like how Leech-mama's as excitable as Floyd but also a worrywart like how Jade is sometimes, or how Leech-papa's calmness mirrored Jade but he can show his cocky, confident side sometimes that mirrored Floyd's. The two made for a real power couple 👉👈 but they love both twins equally!
Leech-mama would be over the moon! She'd swim up to you and hug you and your boyfriend with her entire body, exclaiming about how happy she was that her son found someone he cares for on the land. She'd make for a bone-crushing hug, but thank goodness it's not you getting crushed, it's the eel twins.
Leech-papa would be skeptical at first. Considering his placement at business and how people like to butter him up using gifts, he'd thought the humans up on land wanted to strike a deal with him or something. But once he's gotten to know you, he'd be a jolly dad and won't stop teasing his sons about the relationship! ("So have you tried doing *it* in your merform?" "DAD WHAT THE FUCK-")
Leech-mama would definitely make you promise to look out for her boys (both of them) while on the land, so that they don't get into unnecessary trouble.. kudos if you could reel in Azul as well knowing that those three were as tight-knit as ever.
(If you took Jade as your boyfriend) It's Leech-papa's win! He won't stop bragging to his wife how he won the bet. "I told you, people would go for a gentleman like our Jade!" Jade thinks it's amusing that his parents bet on them, and would proudly brag about you to his family. Even if it was her loss, Leech-mama would be cooing over you two for ages! (She definitely didn't give Jade signals to treat you like an absolute royalty... Okay, she might have, but Jade already treats you like one anyway~)
(If you took Floyd as your boyfriend) It's Leech-mama's win! She'd be swimming circles around your group and laughing at her husband while bragging. "See! Our Floyd's such a blast to be around, people would fall for him!" Floyd laughed and swam around alongside his mom, and you could even see him clinging on her side while they zoom around you. You could've sworn you felt obligated to join them on the zooming!
(additional - If you date both at once) Aww! Leech-mama and Leech-papa would have to call it quits on the betting, but they'd take a small W for whoever made the first move~ They're going to definitely pull their two boys and you for a giant family hug~! They're elated that their boys have found someone who loves the twins as much as their parents do!
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bitterchocoo · 2 months
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Hello,I am have been reading your work for quite sometime :), I really am loving them so far 😭💗 .I saw that your requests were open, so may I be able to ask for Dazai or Fyodor with male reader who are like Sunday from HSR, and could be in a enemies to lovers type relationship :D, the plot can be upto you :>
A Seraphim or..
Osamu Dazai | M. Reader as Sunday [Honkai Star Rail]
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"Who are you..? An Angel.."
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The Charmony Festival.
A once-in-an-era event held in the Country of Festivities, Penacony.
Members of the five great families, which together make up "The Family" on Penacony. As well as staff members of the Reverie, are united in welcoming the world to their home.
The Oak Family.
The Alfalfa Family.
The Bloodhound Family.
The Iris Family.
The Nightingale Family.
All important figures in Penacony.
But one stood out the most...
The man with a halo and wings. [Name].
The leader of the Oak Family. The organizer of the Charmony Festival and a representative of The Family of Penacony. The most important figure amongst them and the one holding the most power.
Who wouldn't be interested in a man like him?
With a charming smile and a soft voice, paired with his unique appearance... he's like an Angel.. no..
A Seraphim.
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The first time he laid eyes on him was at the Golden Hour. The moment he saw the man himself he thought he saw the heavens itself.
A Seraphim.
He thought.
But upon further observation... Dazai soon found a different answer..
His vibe seems a little.. sinister..
His smile barely even reaches his eyes.
His voice is soft and yet his tone is firm.
Either way, [Name] had caught his interest.
.
.
.
.
.
"Your radiant glow illuminates me! Your voice is as soft as an angel! I can't believe that I've met such an angelic being! Please make me the happiest man and kill me with these holy hands of yours."
What.
What did he just said.
What in Harmony's name did he just say?
[Name] can't help but chuckle as he pulls his hand away from Dazai's hold. What was that? A proposal?
"Aha.. you're quite funny, Mr. Dazai.. but I believe you've drank too many SoulGlad." He replied, trying to keep it casual and professional.
This man, this suicidal prick..
He's all talk and flattery. It never fails to get under his skin with how buddy-buddy he is. They're only acquainted and yet this bandaged man acts as if they're old friends. Does he even know who he's speaking to? He's [Name]! Leader of the Oak Family! The very mention of his name could silence a whole room and this man dared do such things to him!
"Now now~ I only drank a few~" Dazai reassured with a smile on his face. "Don't you want to go back home to heaven with me~?"
"I believe you'll be sending me down to the fiery pit instead of going up."
"Ouch! How cruel! Then how about we go to your manor?"
"Don't make me turn you down twice."
This.. man child.. what does his agency even see in him..
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"Oh, Triple-Faced Soul, please sear his tongue and palm with a hot iron, so he will not be able to fabricate lies and make false vows."
"...What have you done?"
"Under the light of the Harmony, all wickedness is revealed. I implore THEM to shed THEIR light, and I'll ask you questions on THEIR behalf. Next... you have 113 seconds to prove your innocence and gain my trust."
"And if I refuse to answer?"
"You can try — and we'll see if the Harmony rejects you."
It had finally led to this.
Both of them had taken off their masks. Revealing the true wickedness underneath. The suicidal maniac and the so-called leader of the Family.
Oh how he hated that man.
Acting like a child who believes he could get away with everything. It's time where [Name] to put his foot down and stand his ground. This entitlement will not go unnoticed by him and with THEIR radiant light.. he will find the truth..
And judge him as the Harmony see fit.
"Question: Do you have an ability?"
"Yes."
"What a simple answer. You, too, understand that idle chatter leads only to poverty."
"Did you neutralize your ability when you entered Penacony?"
"No. My ability nullifies others."
He already figured that out.. which is why he's holding this "trial" with THEM. For the power of the Aeon is far more powerful than any ability in the world. "Does the page of the Book you handed over to The Family belong to the agency?"
Honestly, he never would have thought the Armed Detective Agency would use such an item to bargain their way into Penacony. Something as powerful as the Book. A page of the Book.
It's a given why he allowed them to enter the dreamscape when they bargained such an item.
"Yes."
"Is the Page of the Book in this room right now?"
"Yes."
"Is your memory free from any kind of tampering or deletion, encompassing but not restricted to the techniques of the Garden of Recollection?"
"Yes."
"Are you a former executive from Port Mafia?"
[Name] continues to ruthlessly question him without missing a beat. Dazai furrowed his eyebrows at the question. Something that doesn't make sense. How could [Name] know such things? "Yes. You even know about that?"
"Does your agency and the Port Mafia have any ability to read, tamper with, or manipulate one's own or another's mind?"
"No. Does it matter?"
"Do you love your family more than yourself?"
Okay where is he getting at here... the questions are getting more and more personal. "Yes."
"...Do you hate and wish to destroy this world with your own hands?" [Name]'s expression turned serious as he narrowed his eyes, his perpetual smile seemed to widen slightly. "...I don't know."
"Interesting. Now, the final question..." [Name] breath out, putting his hands behind his back. "Can you swear that at this very moment, the page of the Book is safe and sound in this box?"
Dazai seems to hesitate a little, thinking of a way to get around this. He always has a plan after all. "...Of course."
[Name] hums as his smile turns a little more sincere. "Looks like we can get an answer."
"Open it, Mr. Dazai... It's your last chance to defend your honor."
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Aren't you happy, Mr. Dazai? You'll finally get your wish in seventeen system hours, the end that you desire so much. Off you go, Mr. Dazai. You are free. I will wait here for your good news."
"Maybe one day.. no.."
"In another universe..."
"I can learn how to love you too.."
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pt XVI good omens season 2 (still not traumatic) episode 3 EDINBURGH
HELLO IT'S ME IT'S THE OFFICIAL GOOD OMENS MASCOT WHY DO I STILL KEEP INTRODUCING MYSELF IDK. If you don't know who I am, thank God and Satan for their mercy and flee. Also, the day after I post this, I'll be watching the last three episodes on livestream for the first time so. You know. I'm hyped on the energy of this being my last day not enveloped in tears. Take the summary:
Before the episode starts, someone asks why Crowley said in the last episode that Aziraphale couldn't fall because look at him, all angelic when Crowley looked the same as starmaker. I reply that "Crowley thinks he deserved it, he sees Azi as something beautiful and untouched while he probably sees himself as idk marked in some way so god kicked him down."
I am told that I am learning too fast to weaponise the narrative to induce angst. So then I say oh, I go too fast for you. Tears ensue.
The episode begins! Everyone shrieks about Edinburgh, David Tennant, how it is their favourite episode, and SCOTTISH CROWLEY.
We open with lesbians being gay, and then Muriel enters as Inspector Constable! They are very sweet and very determined to do their job right, and they are adopted by Crowley and Aziraphale just like Jim.
Crowley sits on Aziraphale's chair's arm. The maggots all swoon.
Fine, I also swooned.
Aziraphale gaslight-gatekeep-girlboss-mansplain-manipulate-manwhores his way into getting Crowley to give him the Bentley keys (BOUNDARIES. BOUNDARIES.).
WHAT PLENTY OF USE DO BOTH OF YOU GET OUT OF THE BOOKSHOP?
The really ineffable plan is whatever the fuck was happening in Aziraphale's brain when he somehow went from London to Edinburgh via Loch Ness (check the map) and then proceeded to disguise himself as a detective who pretends to be a journalist.
Crowley slays in sleeve garters and a cardigan keeping house in the bookshop meanwhile, does not sell books, instead cleans with Jimbriel and periodically yeets book stacks into corners when distracted.
Aziraphale reads his old diary entries about Crowley, a (6000+) 13 year old with a crush.
MINISODE MINISODE. They are in Edinburgh during the mid 1800s. Victorian outfits, check. Scottish Crowley, check. Capitalist Karen Aziraphale, che-wait what.
Huh. Well. There's a wee bit of body snatchin' going on, to sell to doctors for medical research because there aren't enough murderers, and to make enough money to survive.
Aziraphale channels his inner capitalist judgemental Karen and ruins that plan, come on Aziraphale you have religious trauma but you're better than this, and long story short, Wee Morag dies after Aziraphale realises his error, her friend Elspeth has to sell her corpse for pennies, and is about to commit suicide with laudanum. Azi, oh god. I'm glad you underwent character development at least.
NOW CROWLEY HERE SLAYS. I KNOW THIS IS AZIRAPHALE'S PERSPECTIVE AND IS BIASED. BUT WITH THIS POV, CROWLEY SLAYS.
He calmly educates Aziraphale about how his whole "the poor have more opportunities and you shouldn't give them money or they'll lose the virtue of poverty" is absolute bullshit, and he does this understanding Aziraphale's situation and not losing his temper.
The framing. The framing of the shot when they see Wee Morag and Elspeth sitting down on a step and explaining their situation. Aziraphale stands above, bustling with righteousness, and judges them. Crowley sits down. He sits down next to them, rather than taking the high ground. He meets them where they are and empathises. It is the fact that he is fallen and damned that makes him behave really divine and sorry I wrote a whole hymn on him have it I'll stop rambling just know I love him.
I think his amusement is a facade so hell won't think he's genuinely being good. I think he's morally grey and incredibly brave and kind.
When Elspeth is bouta kill herself with the laudanum, Crowley grabs it and drinks it himself, and grows tiny and then huge, absolutely high off his head. David Tennant takes the opportunity to travel Scotland from east to west in terms of accent variety.
He gives us the good message of NO DYIN'. NO MORE DYIN'. IT'S NOT ON. And then forces Aziraphale (who doesn't want to ruin her virtuous poverty) to give the girl all the guineas he has in his pocket, and tells her to go off and start a farm or something. BUT NOT JUST PRETENDY GOOD, BE PROPERLY GOOD.
He then gets pulled into hell. To be punished for this. Aziraphale is frightened and heartbroken for him, looking around desperately, and we find out that Crowley didn't meet him for a while after. And later he wanted holy water. To protect himself? He got punished by hell. For how long? The whole month in between the incident and the diary entry? There can't be anyone better at punishment and cruelty than hell.
Sorry I'm just screaming here.
Never mind fuck I started this summary really happy and bouncy and listening to a dance playlist. Dionysus by BTS and Italian pop is still playing and now I'm crying.
Is this the natural progression. Fuck I'm crying. Sorry guys something else happens with Aziraphale politely talking to a phone and Crowley smiling really beautifully while unsuccessfully trying to manipulate two lesbians into a relationship and something about a visit I don't care everyone's being morally dubious as usual and then lovely Scottish music outro I CAN'T FUCKING ELABORATE I'M SITTING HERE CRYING OVER CROWLEY.
right summary done, time to go sob, lmao i thought i wouldn't cry today over good omens HAHAHAHA still not traumatic eh HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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yesimwriting · 6 months
Note
been obsessed with coryo after watching tbosas 😭 please write more of bestfriend!coryo <3
so so adorable 💋 i love u tehe
me gasping like in that tiktok sound: oh my goodness i love this question!!!
in all seriousness i have so many more thoughts on this dynamic omg
----
thinking about bestfriend!coryo who knows your parents love him, and, more importantly, he knows how to use that to his advantage.
it's no accident, he's put in meticulous effort in making sure that they not only approve of the friendship, but that he's their favorite friend of yours. when it comes to a family as prominent and wealthy as yours, parental approval goes a long way, especially with how regularly your parents leave town for business.
your father's admiration isn't an easy thing to win, but coriolanus is no stranger to uphill battles, and you're worth it. with the way that you look at him, how could you not be?
so he puts in the work: being the perfect student in classes taught by known friends of your father, wearing his best clothing and practicing old capitol etiquette his grandma'am was more than happy to review with him before family dinners that you invited him to, and making sure to keep proper distance between the two of you whenever your parents are around, no matter how difficult it is for him to remember to not hold your hand.
the hardest part is the fact that most of your father's intimidation comes from the fact that he's the exact kind of man coryo wants to be. powerful, respected, and in a position to never worry about finances or status. but he keeps at it, taking more care than usual to make sure that the signs of poverty are never visible in front of your parents.
even if that means purposefully leaving leftovers of the best food he's eaten in years on his plate so that no one will think he's starving. even if you give him a look that only he can feel the strangeness of because even though you've never spoken of his financial status, you can tell that he's not as well off as everyone thinks. that's the only thing about you that digs beneath his skin--you can always tell.
he's unsure if his efforts are working because of your father's constantly stoic disposition even though you assure him that that's your father when he's relaxed.
but then one day, he's over on your father's last night at home before returning to the districts to oversee some business, and your father asks to speak with him in private. you're instantly snapping your head up from your textbook, wanting to make sure that your father won't say anything embarrassing or rude.
he's scared off other friends in the past and even though it hurts, you never fight back too much because your father isn't an easy man to talk back to. but this is where you draw the line. you're not going to lose your coryo.
coryo feels something in his stomach knot, especially at that bewildered look behind your eye, but he's not about to be openly intimidated, so he assures you that he's fine. when you push, asking what topic could possibly involve just coryo and him and be that private, your father says that it's just business from man to man.
coryo has to force down a smile because he knows he'll be hearing no end of it from you as soon as the two of you are alone together. then he starts to think that this might be it. maybe your father has found out about his true financial status or dean highbottom has finally gotten to him and he's about to be banned from seeing you.
he forces down his anxiety and follows your father into the hall. your father's quick to the point, letting him know that he's leaving for another long stretch of time and that your mother's social and professional engagements mean that you'll be alone often. he closes the statement by asking coriolanus to look after you until he returns.
the realization that coriolanus has made it hits him at the same time as the relief and for a second all he can do is stare. then his senses return to him and he's swearing to your father that he'll take such good care of you, your father will have nothing to worry about. then your father's clasping his shoulder and offering him a gruff but oddly genuine thank you, son before telling him to get back to your room before you get paranoid.
it's an odd way to end the moment, but coryo's so busy trying to convince himself to not mentally plan out your wedding (because let's be honest, that's a level of trust from someone like your father might as well be a pre-engagement) that he doesn't think of it.
when he gets back to your room, you ask as casually as you can manage what your father wanted. after telling you that your father just wants to make sure that you're looked after while he's away, coryo expects you to be happy. but instead of reacting positively, you just sort of nod and mumble something polite before attempting to go back to studying.
something in his chest hardens. he's your best friend, who you spend as much time as socially acceptable with, and you two are being given the perfect excuse to be around each other more and you're not happy.
he immediately pushes and you reluctantly tell him that this has to mean that he's in with your father. another thing that coryo thinks you should be thrilled about. the more your father approves, the closer the two of you can be. he's accusing you of being sick of him, of trying to get rid of him, of no longer wanting to be best friends with him.
that has you scrambling to defend yourself. there's little you consider more important than your friendship with him. it's the only bond you fully trust.
so you tell him that your real concern is that your father never gets along with your friends that way, and that the only similar reference point you have is the way he talks to people like him.
you then tell him that the people in your father's social circle aren't like coryo. at the very least, not your coryo, who's never harsh with you and would rather spend parties sitting with you than sharing cruel opinions to impress other men.
all coriolanus hears is that you don't see him the way you see the actually important men. the hurt behind his eyes has you moving to stand and reaching for him. he lets you take his hand but doesn't react, so you explain it as transparently as possible. people that your father likes are mean, and you don't want to lose him to that.
there's something about the way you say it, all round eyes and genuine worry. it reminds him too much of tigris, of the newfound hint of tension in their relationship that's become more prevalent. she's constantly reminding him of what his father's success turned him into.
coryo's pulling you into a hug, whispering promises that you could never lose him. you're hugging him back tightly, hand smoothing circles against his back.
he realizes he means what he's saying. he can achieve the prominence he wants without alienating you. there's a way to be stern with the world and just coryo to you. and even if his edges become a little sharper, he'll keep that away from you and you'll understand.
you may criticize some of your father's views and actions, but you do love him. coryo sees it in the way that you constantly strive for his approval, he sees it in the way your face lights up when he's home. if you can love your father through your disagreements, you can love him as well. he'll make sure of it.
feeling better, he starts semi-playfully chiding you for even thinking that anything could take you away from him. that you should know better than to not see this as yet another thing he's doing for you, for your friendship.
you don't want to admit it, but you're feeling a little bad for reacting like that. after all, coryo was so excited to tell you and you know your father's capable of scaring people out of your life. at least this means that nothing's going to get in between the two of you.
coryo recognizes your slight pout and the apologetic line between your eyebrows. the two of you so rarely argue that even a hint of conflict has you willing to do anything to make things feel normal again.
so he lets himself play into his hurt. you're quick to pick up on it, holding onto him a little tighter. the two of you stay like that for awhile until you break the silence, saying that you're happy that he has an excuse to be around more.
eventually the two of you end up sitting on your bed, both of you silently agreeing that you've done enough homework. instead you focus on reassuring him, holding his hand between both of yours, pressing the occasional chaste kiss against his knuckles and resting your head against his shoulder until he has to go home.
after your father leaves, coryo takes his promise to look after you seriously. he's already in the habit of walking you home after school every day, but he start staying over after every day. the lack of authority figures around makes it a little easier to accept the after school snacks your maid always prepares and sometimes he even lets you send some home with him.
his grandma'am's over the moon when he starts accepting invitations to school social events that he honestly considers painful because he's escorting you. she's convinced that the two of you are getting married and with your family's status and the snow name, there's no door the two of you won't be able to unlock. even though you're still just friends, he rarely reminds her. it's for her own sake, he tells himself, it makes her happy.
the promise to your father also makes him bolder. he feels more assured, more justified in his disapproval of those that show a little too much interest in you.
you still don't notice the way his jaw tightens when some unaware guy gets too close, or think anything of the way that it almost always leads to him grabbing your hand.
he also stays over more, sometimes leaving for a few hours in the late afternoons so your maid doesn't think anything's going on. your family's estate is so large it's easy enough to get him in and out through a secondary exit.
the two of you fall into such a good routine that when your parents do get back, they start trusting coryo even more. your father asks if he can take you to certain social events that normally you wouldn't be allowed to attend and your strict weekday curfew becomes more of a suggestion when he's around.
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superfallingstars · 5 months
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snape is such a fun character to make headcanons for because i feel like there’s so many ways you can go with it. like, i’ve seen a lot of people say that snape doesn’t take care of himself, like not eating well or washing his hair (lol), and i think that definitely makes sense considering his martyrdom/guilt complex and being raised in poverty. but i’ve also seen people imagining that snape is like really good at cooking and baking, which makes sense with him being a potions master but also kind of conflicts with the other point of view. i think the happy medium is that snape knows how to cook and bake but wouldn’t take the time to do them for himself, only for other people. however there’s a secret fourth option that i want to know people’s opinions on
i like the idea that snape actually does take care of himself, but he’s just kind of bad at it. like i think he tries to make his hair look decent, but it just gets greasy really fast and he tends not to notice until it’s already in pretty bad shape. and i also kind of like the idea of snape not only cooking and baking for others, but also for himself – not out of any real love or care for himself, but as a way of chasing success and distancing himself from his childhood and from poverty. like i can just picture him at the malfoys trying some fancy hors d’oeuvres and being like, oh, so this is how the other half lives. i want to get good at this. and there’s something wonderfully ironic (and let’s be real, kind of pathetic) about the idea of snape carefully preparing a charcuterie board of expensive delicacies to eat by himself in the dungeons or the drafty old sitting room in spinner’s end.
in this case, his hair and his eating habits are really symptoms of the same problem – he’s trying to run away from his past, but he just keeps failing. he tries to fit in with the upper class and the purebloods, to the point he acts like them even when he’s alone, but there’s always something that betrays him as an outsider, whether it’s his body, his loneliness, or the fact that he still lives in his childhood home. no matter what he does, no matter how hard he tries to escape himself and his memories, he just can’t succeed.
…almost like how even when he’s trying to be a good person, he still has to kill someone he cares about to be one. he’ll never be free of his past, he’ll never be firmly on one side or the other. he’s just kind of doomed.
basically the takeaway here is that any headcanon can be true if you frame it the right way. also we should read way too much into everything forever. ok byeee
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