something i desperately need in alecto the ninth is for harrow to be chasing after gideon. like, one of the most heartbreaking aspects of their relationship is that gideon genuinely believes that harrow can never be as devoted to her as she is to harrow. like, she SAYS as much to ianthe at the end of htn (and meanwhile, harrow is standing in a crumbling mansion clinging to the memory of gideon for everything she’s worth, turning herself into gideon’s mausoleum, but gideon has no way of knowing that).
gideon needs to be wanted. she manifests that in her desire to join the cohort, and it is most obvious in the way she emotionally latches onto the idea of her mother, an idea that is violently destroyed when she finds out that her mother never wanted her either. that’s why she’s the saddest girl in the world, as nona says - she might be the prince of the empire, but she isn’t wanted. ianthe is more devoted to harrow. the emperor is grieving his original lyctors. harrow is still obsessed with the idea of the body in the tomb. pyrrha found nona to love instead. hell, even aiglamene kept herself at arm’s length throughout gideon’s life. gideon really, really doesn’t think that she is loved at all.
all of this is to say I need it to not be gideon running after harrow in the last book. I need harrow to be the one showing gideon how much she cares. that gideon’s sacrifice tore her apart, that she’ll willingly burn everything to get gideon back. let harrow be the devoted one.
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one of my favorite things about mdzs is that for how heavily its plot involves politics of classism and misogyny... even the characters most directly impacted by it can't and don't free themselves from it. literally the closest exception is mianmian.
meng yao being the "son of a whore" wasn't some sort of commie awakening for him that led him to wanting everyone to be socially equal. he played the political game, climbed the ladders, sucked up to and backstabbed and murdered people, including other prostitutes who actually had nothing to do with how he and his mother were treated at the brothel he grew up in.
he put in so much extra excessive effort for even a fraction of the same respect that members of gentry cultivation clans got. and he did deserve to be treated more humanely! but he feeds into the exact same system that created him, leading to his own undoing.
his efforts were for a fragile upward mobility that was never going to hold up. he never surpassed his origins nor did he empower others in similar stations, because the society he lives in is not one that would accept that.
the second he got caught and all those crimes exposed, he was scapegoated to hell and back, replacing wei wuxian as society's terrible one-sidedly evil boogeyman overnight.
speaking of not-quite male gentry, i think it's interesting that wei wuxian explicitly doesn't try to climb the ladders in BOTH lives, knowing full well that anything he does will be punished just for the sheer fact that he is wei wuxian.
wei wuxian is scolded for giving intelligent and correct answers in school. lan wangji does the same and is praised.
wei wuxian occasionally lounges around with fellow disciples and is punished. jiang cheng does the same and mostly escapes.
wei wuxian refuses to carry his sword around in public (after losing his golden core, which nobody knows) and is scorned as an arrogant upstart. nie huaisang has been doing the EXACT SAME THING for YEARS and nobody bats an eye.
unlike jin guangyao, wei wuxian knew subconsciously from the start that his acceptance was superficial and that he could be cast out any time. when he was 10 and recently taken in by the jiangs, he canonically would not eat or use "too much" food and water because he thought they'd find him a nuisance for "wasting their things" and kick him back out.
now away from just the classism, yu ziyuan is a proud and strong noblewoman in a society that belittles and derides women for everything they do. her strong cultivation doesn't matter. she's victim to the vicious rumors of her husband loving another woman who is strong like her but apparently had a more likeable personality.
it doesn't matter even if jiang fengmian didn't cheat or that wei wuxian is wei changze's son with cangse sanren; yu ziyuan can't bear with the humiliation of herself (and by extension her children) not being "good enough". she's ridiculed for "failing" in that one duty as a wife, mother, and woman.
she lashes out and takes out that anger on everyone present for years, giving her children lasting trauma and also being a key element in how the jiang family and yunmeng jiang sect are effectively wiped out at the hands of the wen clan.
madam jin doesn't even have a name outside of the fact that she's married to jin guangshan. i don't even remember reading anything that indicates if she's a strong or weak cultivator, or what, which in itself proves that to most people, it doesn't matter. she's "just" a woman.
of course she's angry at her husband's affairs and all the bastard children they bring in. but she also can't do anything about them, so she lashes out at the few people she can: servants. non-cultivators, probably. those very same bastard children.
shoutout to meng yao getting shoved down a flight of stairs at age fourteen, because if madam jin tried that move against her husband instead, it would make her lose even more face, which as a noblewoman she'd never do.
and that's not getting into how jiang yanli is consistently sidelined for being physically weak.
that's not getting into how mianmian was actually a good cultivator, but was mocked by everyone around her for trying to stand up for wei wuxian when everyone was turning on him. how everyone scoffed at luo qingyang's words as "just some lovesick woman" who "obviously wants to marry or bed him since he saved her".
luo qingyang is the only one of these characters who HASN'T died. she didn't play society's games like jin guangyao. she didn't dig her heels in confidence of her own abilities like wei wuxian.
she didn't bitterly lash out like yu ziyuan and madam jin. she didn't gently accept it like jiang yanli.
she just LEFT.
she married an ordinary merchant and cultivates separately from mainstream cultivation society, and therein found her own peace and happiness.
mxtx doesn't bother with particularly class conscious or feminist vocabulary to hand-hold readers into understanding these disparities, but that choice highlights them & the deeply entrenched politics of their society even more. i really love it.
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patented 'not that I care that much or anything so there's no need to dwell on it too too much ahaha *sweats nervously* but tain would you pls consider not murdering my mom (and the mother of your child) for absolutely no reason whatsoever? no pressure tho of course you know best! :)' smile
(it's so dark but also so funny that when tain keeps on Hinting Ominously, garak's reaction seems... slightly exasperated? more than anything, under all the tension fsdjafsl. this exact conversation has definitely happened multiple times over the last thirty years, lending horror an edge of 'oh this again huh' ennui and hilarity. 'I should have killed your mother before you were born'/'so you've told me, many times'. I think it's the turnaround time from 'I've missed you, Elim' to this that drives it from straightforward psychological horror sneaking dread to still that but also kind of hilarious. it really took tain less than five minutes to go there didn't it. wow. well, actually. I think maybe the real horror part is that garak still loves him and doesn't know how to stop. somewhere in there is a five year old whose heart is a desperate stupid little moth and his father is a ruinous forest fire in the night, brighter and closer than any star. of course it burns you to touch it that's just what love is, right. *spots a smiling julian bashir in the loading bay holding a box of chocolates out of the corner of his mind and experiences something harrowing and existential he simply cannot unpack right in this moment thank you* right???)
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Something I wonder about Simon and Betty's relationship is how long they were together before the whole crown ordeal. But they were engaged, you say. My aunt (in)famously met my uncle and had a ring on her finger in 8 weeks. We've seen that both Betty and Simon were both weird outcasts, crazy determined and a pinch insane. I would not be surprised if they decided they'd met their one true love and got engaged super quick.
My point being, Betty's shifting to revolve around Simon and Simon's rose colored glasses of their relationship feels very much like New Love. They're people who love each other and love being a couple but still haven't quite figured out how to coexist together, as two people in a partnership. I feel like if they'd known each other longer, lived together longer, some of the issues we're seeing would have probably self resolved.
I don't think their relationship is toxic nor is it totally perfect. It's two lonely, most likely neurodivergent people in a relatively early relationship still figuring out how it works. Everything that happened afterwards: the crown, the seperation, the time travel, the magic/madness/sadness just exemplified issues they had both as individuals and as a couple.
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it was not quite like a rot.
it felt just as slow, however. you knew the early signs should have been there since some time ago, yet you missed them and ignored them. it was also similar in the way that it was similar to dying.
but, it really was different.
when you saw a rot, it felt unpleasant. it could be sadness, it might be disgust. in this tale, you didn't exactly feel like that. when you realized it, you barely felt recognition for it.
when you realized you fell out of love with him, you merely stared emptily at the photo in front of you.
it felt cruel. because somewhere inside you, you still believed that he deserved a gentle, tender moment in his life after everything. you still wish that he would know a kindness that he understood enough to soothe every bitter unhappiness that was left inside there. because he, you know more than anyone, had tried his best to be gentle, to be good for you.
you knew it in the way he etched your name on his tongue, in the way he had softened many rough parts of him just to see you smile, and yet—
as the clouds continued to move, unveiling the blue sky, you knew that your time as "his" had come to an end. that day was peaceful. the sky and the world continued to move.
the night came and you decided to put an end to a story. seven hundred and fifty two days had passed, calmly and almost coldly, you offered him a quiet smile.
"hey, can we talk for bit?"
SAE, RIN, BAROU, reo, kaiser, WANDERER, DILUC, LEONA, azul, RIDDLE, malleus, IDIA, ruggie + your faves.
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I really love how we’ve been like Jimmy’s a very powerful listener/watcher this, Jimmy’s the deity of death and all hell breaks loose when the canary stops singing that, and so much more along those lines because when you stop for just a moment to think about it; Jimmy literally is just so pathetic. Not even meaning that as a joke, like Jimmy has died all 3 times first in the life series, and is currently on track towards dying first again. He is teased on almost every server he’s on (jokingly, lovingly of course!) and ridiculed because he’s not a threat.
He’s not a threat. He’s just not. He’s kind, he’s smiley, he’s optimistic, he’s loyal, he’s hardworking. His villain attempts don’t go well. He’s not a threat.
So by us saying that he’s this creature of inherent godly power or an unwilling figurehead of utter death and destruction cascading in his wake, a literal walking, blaring warning sign of something to come, but still nothing he does ever makes anyone see him as anything near menacing, we’ve kind of made him the scariest thing possible.
Our perception of Jimmy is that he’s a person with divine power at his fingertips and nobody even knows it. That he can wield it without even trying.
So yes, Jimmy’s not a threat, and that’s dangerous.
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