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#do i wanna put this on ao3 idk ill think about it in the morning
yikesharringrove · 4 years
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oh god okay feel free to ignore this if you want, idk? but um ive been really struggling with eating lately (like i just kinda panicked about the thought of eating?) and you're really good at writing all this kind of stuff so maybe billy struggling with eating after starcourt (for medical and mental reasons) and steve helping but still bring gentle and encouraging (totally okay if this is a sensitive for you or if you don't want to write it 💕)
This is pretty heavy.
Under the cut for medical stuff, disordered eating, talks of throw up (nothing graphic), me projecting.
The first bit under the cut is my medical story, so skip that if you would like.
Read on Ao3
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So, oof. A little background. I spent three years misdiagnosed when I was young. I was so sick and in so much pain (one of my organs had literally died) that I couldn’t eat. If I did, I was in such severe pain I would throw up. I was 5 feet tall and weighed 62 pounds. If I had lost 2 pounds, I would’ve had an intestinal feeding tube. The doctors thought I just had an eating disorder from doing ballet. They would look at my chart, see another chronic illness I have, and blame my pain on that. They found what was wrong BY ACCIDENT and fixed it within a few hours in one (1) surgery.
So this is based largely on that.
-
He pushed the mashed potatoes around the plate.
“I thought hospital food was supposed to be like, bad. This is pretty alright.” Steve had wolfed down the plate he had gotten himself, not paying much attention to how the plate he had brought Billy was still full.
“Yeah. It’s okay.” He had taken one bite.
He felt fucking sick.
The thought of food, of something in his sore stomach, made him want to hurl.
“You’re not eating?” Steve’s eyebrows were scrunched up, concerned.
“Don’t feel too good.”
“Would something sound better? I could get you whatever you wanted.”
“Um, just like a ginger ale or something. Then I’ll try eating again.” That was his go-to. Ginger ale or Sprite, the carbonation helped his stomach enough that he could force some food down for a while.
Steve got him a few cans from the vending machine.
He ended up taking three bites of potato.
-
Steve made dinner when he finally got to come home.
They had decided he would move in with Steve, “live” in the bedroom across the hall, but they both knew he would be spending the most time in Steve’s room.
He had just made buttered noddles, nothing that would be hard on Billy’s weak stomach, but he had made the noodles from scratch.
And Billy was just staring at them.
“You feeling okay?”
“Just, uh, you know. Stomach’s kinda off.” Steve got him a can of ginger ale from the fridge, slid it to him with a bright smile.
The gesture was sweet, but Billy just didn’t want to risk it.
Every night he spent heaving into the toilet, it made his muscles seize and hurt. It made his throat burn for hours, made him feel like he was wasting away to nothing.
-
He always used the same hole on his belts.
He knew it was the right one from the way the leather was stretched a bit, the buckle leaving indents on it.
But that was too big now.
Did nothing to hold up his pants.
His pants that used to fit.
He tightened his belt.
Two notches. He was two notches thinner.
-
Billy could hear the blender when he woke up.
He was curious as to what Steve was doing, what the fuck he was blending up.
He came downstairs, found Steve with grocery bags all around the kitchen.
“Hey! I’ve been doing some research.” He poured the thick smoothie into a blender. “I think this might be easier for you to eat and keep down. There’s protein powder and some ginger, that should help keep your stomach calm, and spinach and some fruit and stuff.” Steve was fidgeting with his hands.
“Thank you.” Billy sat down with it.
Steve let him take his time, let him drink it in tiny sips.
He was about halfway through when he threw it all up.
-
Billy hadn’t eaten in two days.
But he also hadn’t thrown up in just as long.
Steve poked a plate of plain toast towards him.
Billy stared at it.
Steve sighed.
“Will you just, take one bite? For me?”
He took the smallest bite he possibly could.
Steve let him wait ten minutes before he pushed the toast back towards him.
They continued that until Billy finished the toast, waiting a while between each bite in order to make sure it wasn’t on it’s way back up.
He kept it down almost the whole night, until the pain in his stomach flared again and he was heaving into the large mixing bowl Steve kept next to the bed.
-
Billy was laying on the bed, curled into himself, clutching his stomach.
Steve had been behind him almost all day, rubbing his back, talking in a low soothing voice.
He left when there was a pounding on the door. He left the door open, Billy could hear Max’s voice.
“Jesus, Max. You’re a mess.”
“It’s, it’s raining. And I fell.”
“Why were you skateboarding in the rain?”
“I um, I remembered, whenever Billy felt sick, he liked eating lime popcicles, and I went to Melvald’s, and I got some.”
She sounded hysterical.
“Alright, thank you, Max. Thank you. Let’s get you cleaned up.” He heard them coming up the stairs, going into the bathroom on the landing he kept the first aid kit in.
They were in there for a while before Steve came in, talking in that soft voice he always uses.
“Billy, Max is here.”
It felt like a feat for him to roll over.
Her knees were bandaged up, and her face was splotchy.
“Hey, Shitbird.”
“You look like shit.” He huffed a laugh.”
“Feel like it, too.” Her lip trembled. He didn’t want that. “Hey, thanks for the popcicles. Can I get one? Lime, right?”
“Yeah. Lime.” Steve helped him sit up, gave him one of the popcicles.
It tasted good, and the cold was nice on his throat.
And he even kept the whole thing down.
-
Steve was standing next to Billy as they waited for the doctor.
He had lost nearly thirty pounds since he’d been home. His muscle was nearly entirely gone.
“Steve, just, play it cool.”
“I will not.” He had his pissed off mom face on, and Billy knew he had no qualms about yelling at a doctor.
“Steve, this is just, my life now.”
“No. I refuse to accept that.”
“You yell at Owens every time we’ve come in for the past four months, Steve.”
“And I’m gonna keep yelling until shit gets fixed.”
There was a rap on the door before Dr. Owens let himself in.
“You need to help him.” Billy huffed as Steve started in immediately.
“Um, good morning to you both.” Dr. Owens looked between the two of them.
“Billy can’t eat without throwing up. Look at him. He’s fucking wasting away.”
“Steve-”
“No. I can’t take it anymore. There is something fucking wrong. It is your job to fix it.”
Owens’ eyes were wide, Steve was on a roll.
“Every day, every day he can’t eat anything. He won’t because he’s in pain, and he’d rather not eat than throw everything up. And you need to help him.”
Owens was quiet.
“Let’s run some tests.”
-
Billy was in imaging within a few minutes. He had an x-ray done of his abdomen, and Owens ordered several blood tests.
They were in another room, Billy was having an ultrasound done of his entire stomach.
The tech was looking at his intestines, finding everything normal.
“Look, you’re already doing all this, can’t you just kinda, poke around?”
“I’m not sure-”
“Just kinda,” Steve made a vague wiggling gesture around Billy’s stomach.
She gave him a look.
But she sighed, moving the wand up his body.
“Huh?”
“Wait, what’s huh?”
“Um, excuse me.” She left in a hurry.
“Wait, you think they found something?” Billy’s eyes were side.
“If they did, and I was right, you’re never gonna hear the end of it.” Billy rolled his eyes.
The tech returned with an older woman, pointing at the screen and discussing in low voices.
And then the doctor was leaving again, and the tech was wiping his stomach.
“So, we’re going to prep an operation room. We’re going to have you in there as soon as we can.”
“Wait, what?”
“His gallbladder is infected.” Steve was fucking grinning when he turned back to Billy.
“So, I was right?”
“Steve, read the room. Surgery.”
“Oh, fuck.”
-
Steve was biting his nails.
The chairs in the waiting room were stiff and uncomfortable.
They were given the run down. Billy’s gallbladder had become infected. Probably due to the traumatic situation of his injuries and the many surgeries it took to put him back together.
It was almost completely dead inside his body, causing severe pain and all the vomiting. The doctor had explained that his rapid weight loss had probably only hurt it more.
They said it would take about two hours to remove.
Steve had been staring at the large clock as the two hours clicked by.
It was creeping up on two and a half, and he was getting fucking antsy.
He scrambled to his feet when a nurse called him back.
“You family?”
“Yeah, I’m his brother.” It was easier to lie. He needed to see him.
“He should be waking up very soon. It’s easier if there’s family. His surgery went well, the surgeons were able to remove his gallbladder with no other complications. He may be in pain and delirious when he wakes up, put that will pass, and we can give him more medicine if he needs.” They had stopped in front of a nondescript door.
Steve let himself in, taking the seat closest to Billy’s bed, taking his hand. His eyes were already blinking slowly. He smiled softly when he saw Steve.
“Pretty,” his voice was soft.
“Hey, Baby. I’m right here for you.”
“Thanks for, thanks for fightin’.” Steve smiled back at him, running a hand through his hair.
“Of course, Bill. I’ll always fight for you.”
“Love you.”
“I love you, too.” Billy smiled again. “You feelin’ okay? Need more meds?”
“Nah. Feelin’ good. Feelin’ high.”
“Yeah, they gave you the good drugs.”
“Good drugs.” He laid back in the pillow, his eyelids looking heavy.
“Go to sleep if you’re tired, Bill.”
“Don’t wanna. Wanna see you.”
“I’ll be here when you wake up again.”
“Promise?”
“Promise.” Steve kissed his hand.
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shibyn · 5 years
Text
and the wind sounds like the world’s sigh
persona 4 & 5 | shiho-centric, investigation team Near the end of May, Shiho transfers to a sleepy town called Inaba for a fresh start. However, Inaba isn’t the sleepy town her parents thought would be best for her— its on edge with unsolved mysteries, and Shiho finds that there’s a bit more behind what meets the eye regarding some of her classmates and a TV screen.
chapter 2 | 3.8k | ao3
Shiho smiles. She tries to force her grip on her phone to loosen up, even just a bit, so her knuckles don't creak against it. In the classroom beside her, Morooka shouts loud enough she's sure the whole school can hear him. It makes her tense up a bit-- he wasn't that pleasant of a teacher first impression wise. He had scoffed when she walked into the teacher's office, and he grumbled the whole way to the classroom. She just hopes today's an off day for him. 
Shiho jerks awake as thunder cracks outside her window. The shutters rattle outside, and she can feel her bones vibrating with the resonance. Sheets of rain crash against her window, deafening, yet a mere white noise compared to the thunder. Sudden alarm hums in her veins, and she groans, knowing she won't sleep anytime soon. Her mom told her about this, hadn't she--? The neighbor warned there was going to be a storm tonight. There's been a lot of storms recently, her mom recalled the neighbor's words. She rolls on her side and tries burying her head in blankets and pillows so it could maybe muffle it all, but it's fruitless. The air still cracks with the thunder and her whole room is lit with a flash. A dread settles in her bones when she looks towards her closet door. The Yasogami uniform hangs on the door handle like a mourning flag. The yellow looks solemn in the dark, occasionally illuminated a sickly glow by the lightning outside. She hadn't tried it on, yet-- it felt like an acceptance of her fate if she did, but-- really? She's already here. Might as well deal with it. Yet-- and yet-- The buzz of her phone is sudden, even in the noise around her. She feels around for it-- her hand eventually brushes against the plastic case underneath her pillow, and she pulls it out. Clicking it on, the brightness nearly blinds her for a moment, even though it's on its lowest setting. Ann [1:42 A.M.] hhhhhhhhhh inui's gonna killl meeeee i dont care about  the ancient olympics >:// can fail this test ,, pls,, i havent slept in days,,, Shiho snorts despite herself. The sky rumbles outside, and she keys out a response. Shiho [1:43 A.M.] idk... if you started earlier you could've had more time to sleep :// Ann [1:43 A.M.] what are u doing up young lady u better be going back to sleep and dont give me that!! u know my heart is dedicated to rewatching sailor moon Shiho [1:43 A.M.] says the one who messaged me sailor moon would want you to forgo watching her show and to study Ann [1:44 A.M.] have u even SEEN sailor moon? shed be in the same boat im in She's miles away, miles and miles away. It-- god, it's going to be awful, tomorrow-- Ann won't be there. She won't be there, she won't be there waiting at the metro, she won't greet her in the mornings with the smile that lights the days. She doesn't want to go, she can't go, she doesn't know anyone there, she doesn't want to go-- Shiho takes in a steadying breath. Her phone buzzes even though she hadn't responded. Ann [1:44 A.M.] ur first day is tomorrow, yeah? hows the uniform? Shiho [1:45 A.M.] [image attached] what are your words, oh fashion goddess Ann [1:45 A.M.] hm.... it'll look cute on u definitely one hell of a uniform... doesnt beat shujin plaid, tho ;)) have u gotten any sleep? Shiho [1:45 A.M.] I have, worry about yourself !! I dont wanna go The uniform looms in the corner of her eyes. She's tired, so tired, her knees ache, she wants to go home. But now this is home-- this house, in the middle of nowhere, Inaba, filled with moving boxes and tense silences and unspoken thoughts. It's been like that since she left the hospital, even at the old apartment back in Tokyo, and-- when has home felt like home? Ann [1:46 A.M.] i know im sorry ill be here for ya, yeah? just one year there you can do it!! Shiho squeezes her phone. She wishes she could have an ounce of the confidence Ann has for her. — Ann [8:14 A.M.] so?? first impressions?? Shiho [8:14 A.M.] its,, like any other school? maybe smaller than shujin? i might just be use to having the school smack dab in the center of the city, tho Ann [8:14 A.M.] isnt it just hills and hills out there?? god... its kinda spooky to think about that... no crazy tall buildings within miles... Shiho [8:15 A.M.] hey, i think it's pretty quant out here Shiho smiles. She tries to force her grip on her phone to loosen up, even just a bit, so her knuckles don't creak against it. In the classroom beside her, Morooka shouts loud enough she's sure the whole school can hear him. It makes her tense up a bit-- he wasn't that pleasant of a teacher first impression wise. He had scoffed when she walked into the teacher's office, and he grumbled the whole way to the classroom. She just hopes today's an off day for him. Ann [8:15 A.M.] sure, sure how does it feel?? being one with nature?? ahh the cool spring breeze, the pollutionless air--!! Shiho [8:15 A.M.] i think that pollution is finally messing with your head Ann [8:15 A.M.] HEY!!! The door slides open abruptly beside her, making her jump and nearly launch her phone down the hall. She shoves it quickly into her pocket, swiping at her skirt for dirt that wasn't there. Morooka sneers, which looks kinda strange with his overbite. "You kids these days and your damn phones..." he spits, and stalks back to the podium without another word. Her hands shake, so she clenches them to keep them still. She takes a deep breath, thinking, please let this be a woke-up-on-the-wrong-side-of-bed morning, and steps in after him. The first thing she notices is that the class is dead silent. They stare at her owlishly, and briefly, she thinks something's wrong. Is her uniform crooked? Backwards? Inside out--? Her hair weird? The humidity might've made it flick up in weird places-- She spent so long this morning making sure everything was alright, though it was more out of an anxious habit rather than to make a good impression-- Was-- was she walking weird? She straightens her back, eyes focused on her feet, right, left, right, left, one after the other-- she didn't think her limp was bad today-- Her fingernails bite into her palm and stands beside Morooka's podium. It's okay, it'll be okay, she thinks like a mantra, trying hard not to show her nerves. She won't--can't-- let something like being introduced to class let her stumble. They're looking because they're curious, she reasons, which does a significant amount to reducing the tension in her back, they're not looking because they're malicious. They're not looking because you walk weird. They're not. It's okay.
"Lets hurry an' get this over with before I waste any more of my time," Morooka says, scowling in her direction. The tension regrows along her spine from his scrutiny. Just as she opens her mouth to introduce herself, he cuts her off-- "Due to some trashy circumstances, this kid's been tossed to this dump not even a quarter through the stinkin' year. Couldn't even wait till the end of the semester, huh?" He looks towards her, as if actually asking her.
Her limbs suddenly feel like they're locking up under his mocking glare. Her mouth goes dry. Is this for real? she thinks, a bit astounded, because wouldn't the teachers here be warned of-- "I..." she starts, maybe to say something back, because he's looking at her like he wants an answer. But-- what is there to say? What answer can she give? She doesn't want to be here, he doesn't want her to be here, so-- Is this what it was like for Akira? Shiho thinks fleetingly, glancing towards her new classmates yet not at all-- none of them wear an expression, an indication, even a hint of what she should do-- he-- he had it so much worse, didn't he? People thought he was awful before he even stepped foot in the school-- "Well? Hurry an' tell them who ya are." He sounds agitated. He motions back towards the class like it's a dismissal. Shiho chews on the inside of her cheek and tries to steel her nerves. "I'm. I'm Suzui Shiho," she says, trying not to trip up with all the eyes on her, "It's nice to meet you." "You shits better not think about tryin' anything funny," Morooka says abruptly, his eyes darting from boy to boy with a nasty glare. "She's comin' straight from Tokyo, and while that place is a shithole and full of assholes, none of you baboons can measure up. I better not see any funny business goin' on later!" Are— are teachers allowed to curse this much? Shiho blinks, glancing towards him. She doesn't know whether or not to be grateful-- it's hard to tell with the mix of insults in his words. No one in the class looks put-off by his word choice, which doesn't exactly help. "You, you're gonna sit over there," he says, motioning vaguely in the direction of the second to last row of desks, near the door. She takes this as her leave, trying not to acknowledge the eyes following her as she sits down in her seat. The girl next to her is silent, staring openly, chin propped up in her hand, eyes half-closed. Some people towards the front of the class crane around in their seats, peering at her. She tries to ignore the stares, the whispers that quietly arise, and she twiddles her thumbs. This is awful, awful-- Soon enough, Morooka starts teaching (can she call it that? it's more aggressive than any teacher she's ever seen-- Ushimaru can’t even top it) and focus is shifted off her for a while. She slips her phone out of her pocket, trying to discreetly hide the fact that she's on it. Honestly-- she doesn't care. Her body's too tense and high strung and she really just wants to see Ann. Ann [8:16 A.M.] shiho? ya still there? Shiho [8:24 A.M.] I think my homeroom teacher beats ryuji in terms of how much he swears Ann [8:24 A.M.] oh!! did u just get introduced to your class!! how was it!! Shiho [8:24 A.M.] not. the best? i kinda just want the day to be over aren't you meant to be focusing on class Ann [8:25 A.M.] youre much more important than whatever ushimarus talking about :// besides!! u say that as if we didnt text each other during class time at all !! be sure to message me when your break and lunch is!! ill try to keep messages in those time so i dont get ya in trouble so early on so!! im gonna go radio silent for now so ya dont get scolded good luck!! ♥♥ message me if ya need anything!!! The corners of her mouth lift up ever so slightly. — Shiho's never been one for being the center of attention. It was just a guarantee, being quiet-natured and friends with a foreign-looking student that everyone seemed to have a vendetta against. Ann's always been the one to dispel unwanted attention previously, too. But she's not here-- so when a couple of students crowd around her desk after class ends, she can feel herself freezing up. "So, you're from Tokyo, too!" One peppy girl says, her hair pulled into a half pony tail. "What chance! It's so rare to get transfers here in the same year! And for them to be from Tokyo!" "I wonder if it's gonna be a trend, like more people from the city will come flooding in," the girl with glasses says. "How's the jump, huh?" The boy who sits in front of her asks, sitting backwards in his seat to face her. She bristles at the question, ice creeping in her veins. He grins innocently, to which she realizes of course they wouldn't know, don't worry, its just weird phrasing, "Seta-san didn't say much about it. What about you? From the city to the middle of nowhere?" Its quiet for a beat, and Shiho really wished they weren't looking at her. "It's... alright, I mean," Shiho says slowly, trying to choose words that aren't too strong in feeling. She had lived in Tokyo for her whole life, and the countryside is so, so different, but she doesn't know how to explain the feeling to these people. She doesn't think any of them will really understand what it's like to be plunged into silence after being surrounded by noise her whole life. "It's... kinda nice being able to see an actual hillside when I walk around, though?" The girl with glasses giggles at her response. "Nature over industry, right? Seta-san adjusted pretty quickly, so I don't think it should be a problem for you!" Well, sure. But that's also Seta-san. Seta-san probably wasn't booted from his home, his friends, his life, all because of the decisions that were outside of his reach, and then dumped off in a place so different, so far away from all he's known. She isn't Seta-san, and she doesn't want to be here. Shiho smiles instead and pinches the back of her hand. "Hopefully." "Have you had the chance to wonder around Inaba yet?" the boy in front of her asks idly. Shiho briefly wonders how long break is, so she doesn't have to sit through much longer of this. She wishes this could just end. She wishes the day would end. "I have," she says, trying to ward off the strain in her spine. "Um, I didn't get to see much, though. We only went to a noodle place, really, which wasn't far..." "Oh! You mean Shishio's Noodle Bar?" One of the girl chimes. Shiho can only nod yes, because she doesn't really know what place it was and it seemed like the proper thing to say. "I love that place! They just put the right amount of sauce on, and the perfect amount of meat in!" the girl gushes, "There's tons of independent restaurants around here, and all of them are incredible!! You really need to try them all, Suzui-san!" Shiho tries to say something back, maybe like the noodles were great or what are your favorite places or just ok, because that seems like the things to say, she can't just give up having an okay school year here just because she doesn't want to be here, right? Even if her skin is crawling at the prospect of conversation with strangers. Ann would want her to try, wouldn't she? And besides, these people-- they're trying to make the effort to talk to her, she has to at least respond. Maybe they want to be friends? But— she finds herself drowned out the second she opens her mouth. "Oh, have you been to the Steak House recently?" the glasses girl asks, unknowingly right over Shiho's quiet words, "they added a new flavor and a kebob option! It's super tasty!" "No way! I gotta try some now! You wanna come with me after school?" "Definitely! You wanna come, Asahi?" "Oh, hell yeah! I'd never pass up going to that place!" "We can go if it's not raining after school. I swear, all it's been doing is raining! Some spring it is..." "It's karma! We didn't get much snow, so now we have tons of rain." Ah. Suddenly, it's like a void has grown around her and the people lounging on the desks around her. She knows these people are trying, maybe, trying to welcome her here, to make her not feel lonely, maybe to be friends, but-- she doesn't feel there, not physically, with people talking all around her, and-- She squeezes her phone. It'd be rude to pull it out and text Ann, wouldn't it? These people seem nosey, they might ask her who-- "Ah, isn't the Steak House near where the police are hanging out, though?" The boy asks solemnly, arms crossed over the back of his chair. "The street might be blocked off, since they're investigating every corner of Inaba." The glasses girl grumbles aloud. "What a pain! I swear, they're just everywhere now-a-days, especially since Tatsumi went missing..." Tatsumi. Shiho remembers that name. She remembers the police officer asking her and her father, in the dark of night, if they knew where the kid was. Wasn't he a student at Yasogami? These-- these people don't seem particularly alarmed that he's missing. "I, uh--" Shiho starts, curiosity bubbling out of her. Should she even ask-- well-- it's a little late to recoil, with the curious expression on the boy's face and the two girls peering at her. She swallows, and starts again. "I-- who... who is Tatsumi Kanji?"
The reaction... isn't what she expected, if she's being truthful. The boy's mouth twists into a brief sneer, the girls scowling. It's like she spoke words of taboo, and not someone's name. "Tatsumi? He's just a punk." The boy waves it off, like he isn't someone missing. "All he knows how to do is pick a fight. Some first year asshole-- thought he was on top of the school..." "Don't worry about him, Suzui-san," one girl says politely, yet it's the furthest thing from it, "he's probably off with a gang doing who knows what-- drugs, getting drunk, whatever. He's total a creep." And. And it hits her like how it was with Akira. She remembers dimly, words of warning, pointing fingers, averted gazes, all regarding a transfer student with curly hair and dorky glasses, don't speak to him, he's a criminal, you know? Akira only wanted to live quietly, and yet-- his whole life in Tokyo, shattered, from day one. Yet-- yet he was nothing like what people said, he wasn't a bad person. Ann trusts him, trusts him wholeheartedly. She told Shiho that he's exactly the dork that he looks like, he loves Big Bang burger challenges, he loves cats, he's a prankster, he-- he didn't deserve to have everyone scorn him-- And she remembers the quiet confession of Mishima to her, his hands shaking violently, eyes glassed over, he told me to. He told me to ruin Kurusu's life, to share the criminal records. All because of Kamoshida-- Shiho doesn't know Tatsumi Kanji, doesn't know if he's actually a creep or a punk or an asshole, but he's still missing. Shouldn't-- shouldn't they in the least care--? "Hey, lay off." They all turn— there's a group of kids sitting in the middle section of the classroom, two of them glaring. The two glaring are both brunettes, and there's a black-haired girl trying to divert their attention, with quiet 'don't start a fight, you guys--' yet with a hard look in her eyes, and a gray-haired boy sitting down, a mix of a scowl and a simple frown on his face. His eyes are sharp, but he's not stand-offish as the other two. A girl scowls in front of her. "What are you talking about, Hanamura?" "Tatsumi isn't some creep or asshole. All of you just are judging him without knowing who he really is," the brunette girl says, fists clenched by her sides. "I don't know about that," the boy in front of her says languidly, "Don't you know the kind of deals he's been making with those biker gangs? He's a delinquent, through-and-through." The brunette boy looks ready to retaliate, but the bell cuts him off before he can start. The people around her disperse, her seat mate returns, and class starts. Shiho fiddles with her phone, and wants to leave. — Shiho resorts to fleeing from the classroom when lunch begins, hoping to avoid any curious classmates and to maybe figure her way around the building. She opted out for lunch, anyways-- she left the box on the counter, knowing that she might not be able to eat with her stomach roiling with nervous energy from being in this school. The halls are sparse with students. Some talking, some wandering, some staring. She bristles, knowing she’s like a sore thumb in this school-- in Inaba, really, which is apparently so countryside that a new family moving in was about the most intriguing thing around. That can’t possibly be true-- sure, Inaba wasn’t big, the high school even smaller, but there’s no way that this community was so tightly knit that everyone knew everyone so anyone outside of the goddamn place was the most interesting person around, with stories of places so far away. There’s a train station here, it can’t be like there’s no outsiders around. She just wishes Ann was responding so she could keep her attention off the lingering looks and curious glances. She heads up a flight of stairs, trying to scope a library she might be able to stake out lunch in for the rest of the school year. It’s always quiet in the library, and hopefully it’ll keep any students from trying to talk to her. Especially with just being there, in the classroom, surrounded but alone, included but only because of proximity-- she doesn’t think she has the guts to really talk with anyone today, anyways. She might not have the guts to talk in the next few weeks-- she’s never been the new kid, never been in a different house, never not been surrounded by busy streets, she’s only known her home in Tokyo. She can’t find the library or any club rooms, which is kinda strange. Maybe they’re on the first floor? There’s another set of stairs ahead of her; it’s either the rooftop, or another floor that might have them. She doesn’t see anyone else heading up, so it must be the roof? Ah. Well, she’s still got time to explore. The roof might be a place of solitude if the library isn’t. Kinda ironic, she thinks fleetingly, footsteps quiet as she goes up. The hallway is bright with light from a set of doors-- it’s the roof. There’s no signs or anything to keep students out, so Yasogami must be one of those schools where the roofs are open. Shujin wasn’t, but it’s not like anyone really cared. She briefly wonders how things would be if they did. She opens the door, and the wind immediately seems to pick up the second she does, sending her hair whipping around behind in her pony tail.  The air’s weighty with rain soon to come, but it’s only fairly cloudy out. Ah, wow-- the roof is clean, free of abandoned desks and instead has an applaudable amount of solar panels set up. There’s a couple of students up here already, talking amongst themselves and picking at bento boxes resting on their laps. It’s a big, open space. It’s nearly strange not to see tall buildings blotting out the sky, or casting long shadows over the rooftop. It sets the roof as a whole different entity in her mind-- her knees ache, but not in the same crippling way they did on Shujin’s, when she stood up there with Ann and Akira and tried to keep face while looking down. It’s bright, clean, and she can see the sky. So. Maybe it is a kind of fresh start. She still hates Inaba and wants to be back in Tokyo, but hey, it’s something.
1 note · View note
chimchimchoo · 6 years
Text
Fly Me to the Moon :: Ch 1
Genre: Pure fluff crack
Word Count: 2,510
Pair: Yoongi x Jimin
Collaborated with @tayvengeance
Chapter: 1
"CHEER UP THIS SAD, EMO BOY!"
02-222-3333
Jimin stared at the note on the bathroom wall for a solid 5 minutes before he pulled out his phone and typed in the number.
authors note: we do not own any of the pictures, for better formatting so it’s more comfortable to read, check it out on AO3! AO3 link:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/14944508/chapters/34626863 Twitters: Tae’s Sujin’s <3 - Tae & sujin
Chat with Mochi_Moves
2015.11.15
14:00
Mochi_Moves:
Will this make you feel happier?
Tumblr media
SUGA:
What the fuck
Who is this?
Mochi_Moves:
That doesn’t matter. Did the picture make you laugh? c:
SUGA:
No what the fuck
I think you have the wrong #
Mochi_Moves:
Aw :c
No, I just found this number and wanted to make you a happy emo boy!
SUGA:
Wait, who are you
How do you know I’m emo
Also it’s not emo
It’s grunge
Fuck you
Mochi_Moves:
But..I’m not supposed to tell strangers my name :c
Just call me Mochi
I’ll be your anonymous friend c:
Why are you a sad grunge boy?
SUGA:
Life is a bitch
That’s why.
Mochi_Moves:
Ohmygod, this poor soul
Who hurt you??????
SUGA:
Like i’m gonna tell a stranger my life story
Mochi_Moves:
But didn’t you know?
It’s easier to tell strangers
Come on c: c: c:
SUGA:
Add another smile to that and I just might strangle you
I’m kidding
But not really
Mochi_Moves:
:c
SUGA:
Now that’s a relatable emotion
Mochi_Moves:
Okay alright
I won’t pressure you
You can tell me tomorrow c:
Instead tell me something happy about yourself!
c:
SUGA:
I have mint hair.
I guess that’s happy?
Idk
Coloured hair makes me happier
Mochi_Moves:
Mint???? Wow!
I’ve never seen anyone with mint hair
That must look so cool *.*
SEND ME A PICTURE
SUGA:
No, what if you’re a predator
I’ve watched Catfish
I know how this shit goes
Mochi_Moves:
But I’m not! Just the hair
Pleeeaaassseee?
c:
SUGA:
Only if you tell me who you are
Mochi_Moves:
How do I know you’re not a predator either?
Maybe you’re the bathroom janitor for all I know
SUGA:
YOU’RE THE ONE WHO KNEW I WAS AN
EMO BOY
YOU MESSAGED ME FIRST
Mochi_Moves:
I just found it in the bathroom and wanted to
cheer up a sad grunge emo boy
SUGA:
Goddammit Hoseok.
He fucking put my number on the
stall wall again, didn’t he
I’m gonna fight him
Last time he did this, I got calls
nonstop
Mochi_Moves:
Hoseok?
JUNG HOSEOK??????
SUGA:
for a week.
Holy shit.
You know my arch nemesis?
Mochi_Moves:
Yeah! I dance with him!
He’s a great friend
Annoying sometimes…
BUt wonderful c:
SUGA:
Holy shit
You’re that Jimin kid he always
talks about
The revered dancer
“God, Yoongi you should see him. The way he moves his body is
the closest humans will get to magic.”
Mochi_Moves:
Tumblr media
He really said something like that?? Wow, he’s really pushing it
Hah..
But you exposed yourself,
Nice to meet you Min Yoongi c:
SUGA:
That’s Yoongi HYUNG to you
Well, since I know you’re not going to prey on my gay ass
Tumblr media
Mochi_Moves:
Ah, well
Two gay boys can be friends
c:
So don’t worry
I won’t be a gay predator
SUGA:
Fellas,
Is it gay to have gay friends
Mochi_Moves:
Let’s try it and see if it’ll answer your question!
c:
SUGA:
Well, I showed my face.
Your turn, punk.
Tumblr media
Mochi_Moves:
I’m not a punk :c
According to Hoseok
I’m a soft mochi
Tumblr media
SUGA:
Is that that Taehyung kid
He’s in my art class
I swear to GOD
Loudass motherfucker
But I guess he makes me laugh
Mochi_Moves:
BITCHDV
WATCH WOT U SAY BOU
M E
I KNOW WHE REY
YOU SIT
SUGA:
Holy shit he’s been reading over
your shoulder?
Hey kid, you’re wild. I admire it.
Especially when you got the fire alarm to go off
in the middle of free painting the other day.
Idk how you did it. You didn’t even leave your
seat.
Mochi_Moves:
I hav my ways ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Next time i jasdskjf
Sdfgk
Sorry! Taehyung took my phone
When I left the room
But yes it’s the one and only
We’re roommates
c:
SUGA:
I see. So no hanging at your place.
Haha
I’m just kidding
Not really
But yeah
Mochi_Moves:
Oh, so you do want to
come over sometime then?
Is that what you’re saying?
c: c: c:
SUGA:
I thought we had bonded over being
Hobi’s friend
I thought WE were gay pals
Without it being gay
Mochi_Moves:
Ah, you’re right!
I thought maybe
You already went onto the next base
Im so glad it didn’t turn out like that
My best gay pal c:
Second to Taehyung of course
SUGA:
I mean, you are a handsome fella
But
I don’t uh, date, really.
Mochi_Moves:
Ahhhh, does your love life
have to do with you being a sad emo grunge boy?
A tragic backstory?
SUGA:
A tale for another time.
(like far beyond this time)
Hahaha
Tumblr media
Mochi_Moves:
So like
tomorrow?
SUGA:
Someone’s persistent
Why do you wanna know so bad?
Gonna try to fix the depressed grunge boy?
Mochi_Moves:
You’re just an interesting person
Min yoongi
I’ll figure you out c:
SUGA:
That’s hyung to you, brat.
Chat with Mochi_Moves
2015.11.16
02:30
Mochi_Moves:
Tumblr media
Did this cheer you up?
c:
He had too much soju last night
SUGA:
You all drank without me
What the fuck
Mochi_Moves:
I’m sorry :c
I’ll invite you next time!
It was a night out for the dance team
But it can just be us the next time
And I’ll bring taehyung
And hoseok
c:
You don’t want to be around the dance team
When they’re drunk
Trust me
SUGA:
I’ll take your word for it.
Mochi_Moves:
But did it cheer you up????
SUGA:
How can I not laugh at his dumb face
Mochi_Moves:
Just don’t tell him
He’ll make me do push ups for days
if he finds out I have this
considering he blacked out
and doesn't remember a thing
heh
SUGA:
I told him you found my number yesterday
He screamed
Then he sent me this:
Tumblr media
And asked how gay I was for you
Mochi_Moves:
DELETE THIS NOW
!!!!
SUGA:
No. it brings me joy.
Mochi_Moves:
Yoongi
Whyy
:c
SUGA:
Hey, haven’t you been trying to make me
happy?
It worked.
Mochi_Moves:
That’s true..
My pain is your happiness
c’:
SUGA:
But I told him I wasn’t gay for you
AND THEN
He sent me this:
Tumblr media
And said “how about now?”
I just need to know, what was the
occasion?
Mochi_Moves:
Tumblr media
Why does hyung still have this
I swear
I’m going to go talk to this..
Brb
He’s in the other room
c:
SUGA:
Tell him I said thank you for our new
Kakao chat background pic
Mochi_Moves:
YOU DIDNT
MIN YOONGI
TELL ME YOU
DIDNT
SUGA:
Tumblr media
Mochi_Moves:
That’s..heh
I don’t know what to say to that
Asdfhjkl
That was a performance I did a few years back
For a dance competition
Hoseok hyung begged
I didn’t want to
But i did anyway, it’s hyung
I can’t say no to him
I retired the exposed chest look
So don’t expect another one
C:
Ever
SUGA:
Not to sound gay or anything
But
You have a nice body.
Good job.
Mochi_Moves:
Tumblr media
What about you Mint Yoongi?
What do you do?
SUGA:
Write/compose/play music
A lil art here n there
I’m skilled on the piano.
And I have some beats on soundcloud
Mochi_Moves:
Wow! I love a good artist c:
Have you released anything to music companies??
SUGA:
Uh...
Kinda?
Mochi_Moves:
You must be famous! Can I hear some of your work??
SUGA:
I’m about as famous as you.
https://soundcloud.com/bangtan/agustd103
There you go, I guess.
Mochi_Moves:
It sounds amazing!
You’re so talented
One day you could compose a song
For one of my shows???
How cool would that be?!
SUGA:
Woah, take me to dinner first
Mochi_Moves:
So are you asking for a date??
Mint Yoongi
We haven’t even met formally yet…
So fast..
SUGA:
You were the one talking about intimacies
Composing a song for someone is as
intimate as fucking them.
Mochi_Moves:  
Alright alright
Just gay best pals
Who’ve never met
c:
SUGA:
Well are you insinuating that we should get up
get out and go meet somewhere?
Mochi_Moves:
That would be a good start
Besides
Hoseoks been wanting me to meet you for forever now
I just never had the time
Let’s do it for the sake of this poor hyung
SUGA:
It’s a monday morning.
I don’t have class.
We’re getting coffee.
Also
Why is Hobi hyung but you REFUSE TO
CALL ME HYUNG
Mochi_Moves:
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Meet me at the campus cafe at 10?
SUGA:
Yeah. Sounds good.
Chat With Mochi_Moves
2015.11.25
13:00
SUGA:
Hey
Heyyy
Heyyyyyyy
Jimin
Ji
Min
Mochi_Moves:
Mint Yoongi?
Hi!
What
What is it?
SUGA:
Did I leave my composition notebook
at your place? I can’t find it
And I’m honestly freaking out
I’m gonna have a panic attack
All my songs are in there
And some stuff I don’t want people
poking around in
Mochi_Moves:
Give me just a second, I’m walking back to my room
I’m almost there
SUGA:
Fuckkkkk
Okay
It’s okay
Mochi_Moves:
Oh goodness
Uh
I found it!
I caught Taehyung holding it, but I don’t think he read anything
I’ve never lurched at him so quickly
Do you want me to drop it off?
c:
SUGA:
Yes <3
Ew
That heart was so entirely
A you thing
Mochi_Moves:
Aw c:
You’re sending hearts now
SUGA:
Did it make yours go bangya bangya
Tumblr media
Mochi_Moves:
Just a little
c:
SUGA:
That’s fucking gay wow
Mochi_Moves:
I’ll safely return your notebook now!
I’ll guard it with my life
And I won’t read anything
I promise
<3
SUGA:
Jimin
You’re a true hero
I might end up composing that song for
you if you don’t watch out.
Mochi_Moves:
You want to go to the next base already?
wow
I’m impressed
SUGA:
Don’t get your hopes up, sweetie
My emotional capacity is that of a
teaspoon.
Mochi_Moves:
If you triple the recipe, you’ll get a tablespoon
I just gotta triple my love
And your emotional capacity will go up
c:
SUGA:
Which girl group sang that
Bc that’s what you sound like
It’s pretty gay.
Mochi_Moves:
I live with a gay roommate,
I learn a lot of gay things from him
Now open up Mint Yoongi
I’m outside
SUGA:
I would yell @ you for not calling me hyung
But i want my damn notebook.
I’m coming.
Chat With Mochi_Moves
2015.11.27
02:50
Mochi_Moves:
Mint Yoondi
Min
T
Yonff
Ccd:
SUGA:
Wha
Are you drunk?
Mochi_Moves:
Yeff
Yessd
So muffh soju
Whaff aru yo u ding
SUGA:
Where are you?
Are you safe?
Mochi_Moves:
I jusf go t home
Tae t ae passef out
I wasa bored
And mussed u
SUGA:
You saw me like 7 hours ago
Mochi_Moves:
Oghmygo
Ohmydo
That wascd so lo ng ago
::(
SUGA:
Jimin
You should drink water and go to sleep
Please
For your health
Mochi_Moves:
Im
Im nof tierd
Ill  dinrk wahter though
Aru you still u p wrintinh musi
C
???/
SUGA:
As usual.
Mochi_Moves:
WHAt isi it about this tim e/?
SUGA:
My first love.
Mochi_Moves:
Fird love?
I neve r heARd anything abo ut your love life
Didi somethin rly happen to make u
An emo grunge bo y?
Can you ttell me about it??
SUGA:
Not when you’re drunk.
Ask me when you’re sober.
Mochi_Moves:
Ehehhehfdhe
You sitll won t share about yourself :c
I thoght we were best gay pals
I thoufht we got close enough to talk abuot these kind
Of things
SUGA:
Your hangover is gonna be nasty.
How about
I come over in the morning, bring some fire ramen
And tell you about me.
I just don’t want you to forget the conversation.
Mochi_Moves:
Wooooooooooow
minT yoon gi
The sweetest man
Fire ranen sounds
fantatiiiiiiifc
SUGA:
You bet your ass I’m the sweetest man
I’ll fuck up anyone who says otherwise.
Mochi_Moves:
Sweet as suga r
c:
SUGA:
Damn right i am
Mochi_Moves:
<3/
Chat With The.V.Zone
2015.11.29
15:00
The.V.Zone:
Lstn Yoongz
I saw your notebook
SUGA:
I figured you weren’t above snooping in my shit
Trying to figure me out
Or whatever.
The.V.Zone:
I was nvr a fan of you in the first place
Ill b honest
SUGA:
Understandable.
I used to find you unbearably obnoxious
The.V.Zone
I don’’t kno what my Chim has goin on in his head
But he’s all ovr u these days
And im gttn weird vibes
I dnt feel comfortable with this situation
Bck off a little
Chim is a sensitive soul
I don’t want any1 hurting him
SUGA:
Just curious, but what did you read
The.V.Zone
Smthn abt ur first love
SUGA:
Ah.
That’s uh,
I wrote that about my piano
The.V.Zone
Wut.
SUGA:
Look, my family situation was kinda
Eh
It wasn’t great
So I played piano and wrote music
And well
I fell in love with it.
I think it’s the only thing I’ve ever loved.
The.V.Zone:
weLL WHY DIDNT U JUST SAY SO
LOOK @ U
A SOFT EMO BOY FALLIN IN LUV
WITH A
PIANo
Wow u r so gay
SUGA:
My name is literally sugar, why are you all
so surprised to find out i’m nice?
The.V.Zone:
U always look rly grumpy
Like ur ready 2 kill someone
I dnt want my Chim around a murderer
SUGA:
It’s call resting bitch face and I’m sorry it
bothers you.
Jimin is a dear friend to me. I would never
do anything to hurt him.
The.V.Zone:
Well
If u say so
THEN BY ALL MEANS FEEL FREE 2 CUM OVR ANYTIME
But im not kiddin bout backing off
Chims mine
Furever
SUGA:
Wait, are you harbouring romantic
feelings for Jimin?
The.V.Zone:
Am i
Am i harborinfdsf
LMMAAAAAAAAOO
Ohmyg o d
Hyung
Ur so funny
Im crying
Oh dear god no
Im happily taken
But ty for ur concern
SUGA:
See, we don’t talk so I don’t know these
things about you.
Don’t worry
You still and will forever remain Jimin’s #1
The.V.Zone:
Good
But wait
What abt u
R u harboring feelings for my Chim??
SUGA:
I liked it better when we weren’t talking
The.V.Zone
Oh
O h
OH
I liked it better when we weren’t talking too.
BUT 2 LATE 4 THAT
SPILL THE JUICES
I WONT TELL I PROMISE
SUGA:
Every single fiber of my being tells me that
that is a lie
The.V.Zone:
:)
U dont kno me
SUGA:
Yeah that’s the problem
The.V.Zone:
Okay
Rmbr Jimin’s recent performance?
U 2 sick with the flu
And cldnt go
SUGA:
:/ I still feel bad about that.
He was so excited for me to watch.
The.V.Zone
Well
I hve pics
V good pics
If u tell me ill send them 2 u
U wont regret
:) :)
SUGA:
You know, I might have misjudged you, Kim Taehyung.
I apologize for that.
The.V.Zone:
U r forgiven
SUGA:
Well. I haven’t told anyone this
but
I have
emotions
regarding a certain person
named
Park Jimin.
The.V.Zone:
*sigh*
Some1 in luv
With my Chim
SUGA:
You throw the word “love” out so easily
I’ve only known him personally for like 2 weeks
The.V.Zone:
Gr8 point
Thats why ur perfct 4 him
An intellectual
I’ll deliver what i promised
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Cherish these with ur lyfe
Regrettin that flu yet?
SUGA:
Holy shit
I’m gay
75 notes · View notes