#especially the brand of some of them thats like 'yeah i can build myself a new arm but i dont NEEED one' of they like the challenge

[captain-nohbo]

I want to shout out the scienst characters that people hc as disabled whether physically or as a form of neurodivergence. especially when it's by disabled people themselves

#it gives me life #especially the brand of some of them thats like 'yeah i can build myself a new arm but i dont NEEED one' of they like the challenge #the range of ones too that are content because they moved passed the trauma of the event or glad to have people who dont think of them as a #burden and genuinely just like doing things for them and respectinv their boundries when they never had that befoee #also shout out to the cripple punks and the disabled x disabled ships #i really do just think yall writing disabled characters witb actual range is neat #mad scientist #scientist #scientist characters

[ceasarslegion]

I know i have a lot of teenagers who follow me because i dont baby talk to them regarding things like drugs and alcohol and sex. So i wanted to throw out some advice that still saves my ass every day as an adult that i learned to instill in myself as a teenager:

-Learn how to keep house. I know that every adult is beating job skills into you right now and its overwhelming to say to least, but no matter what you end up doing with your life, you will need to know how to cook and clean and budget and go grocery shopping and do laundry and the dishes and x y z. You will need to know how to work with cleaning products like bleach safely and without creating mustard gas by accident. If you figure that out now, you will be able to take care of yourself for the rest of your life. Those are skills that you WILL need every day in the real world no matter what.

-i want to asterix the budgeting part. I know way too many grown adults who could be doing very well for themselves who are broke as shit and actively getting worse because they cant budget to save their lives. Managing your finances is what will often be the difference between living relatively comfortably and struggling to get by.

-dont get roommates if you can help it. I know you will want to, and it will seem like a fun idea to live with your friends and like nothing would go wrong, but roommates ruin friendships. If you can afford to live on your own when you first head out, do it. Trust me, paying the full rent is worth not having to deal with other peoples bullshit taking up your living space. I learned this the hard way, dont be like me. The only people you should be actively looking to live with at the young adult stage of your life are any permanent partner(s) that might come along the way, and you should rush that either. And taking some proper time to be on your own will do you so much good in the long run in realizing what kind of person you are and what you need in things like work, relationships, life in general, etc.

-you don't need a brand new car, and your first apartment doesnt need to be high end and fancy. All your firsts for those things need to be are functional, safe, and reliable. And you will love them regardless if theyre your first car/apartment. And you dont really NEED a car if youre an urbanite with a reliable enough transit system, either. Thats more of an individual thing if thats your situation. I live in an older apartment building with a stove from a brand that doesnt even exist anymore, but its real spacious for one person, in a nice part of downtown where everythings still right outside my door, and all my utilities are included. I pay 500 dollars less in rent a month for this than my coworker who lives 2 blocks away from me and has half the space i do with none of the utilities included because its all smart tech and luxury suites in that building. You don't need all that, you will not notice the difference when you actually live there.

-no one cares about high school tier drama when you hit your college years, especially if you go to an academically-based school. In my experience at least, the schools the nerds end up at think the d&d club is the coolest one on campus. This will pass, you will be fine. The nerds really do inherit the earth after you graduate, and all those bullies really do peak in high school. The guy who was the worst offender towards me in high school now literally pumps gas for his dads gas station because nobody else would hire him. Which is fine, its honest work, but it IS a tad ironic how things worked out there after so many years of telling me he'd be my boss one day. Yeah sure, howd that work out bud

-please dont get into drugs and alcohol just to be cool. I know every adult has treated you like some porcelain doll to be handled with baby gloves regarding any sort of substance, but if you choose to partake in them, all i ask is that you be informed about the risks, you do it safely, and dont do it for social clout. Its not the substances im most concerned about there, its that when you do them for social approval, you dont know when to stop or how to listen to your body telling you thats enough, which is a straight shot to a potential addiction. Its your choice whether or not to consume drugs and/or alcohol, but its irresponsible to act like theres no real risk involved in them, especially if you have the kind of personality more susceptible to addiction. Do them for yourself, in safe environments, as cleanly as you can get them if possible, and only after you educate yourself about what the risks are and what resources there are in your area for healthcare and counseling if you do develop an addiction.

-be selfish, but dont be a dick. Your young adulthood is when you should be selfish in the sense of prioritizing your own mental health, work ascension/schooling, etc, but you can do all those things without being standoffish or disregarding other people in the process. You should be there for your loved ones if you can, but if you cant, give them the common courtesy of telling them. A simple "hey, id love to help you if i could, but i have too much going on right now to spare anything. But im always here to talk about it if you need it, ily and im wishing you all the best <3" is way better than "i cant help you right now, i have my own problems to deal with."

#some thoughts

[hussyknee]

I'll never get over how much privilege the damn chicken shit shit shows and the fucking perspectives they give like. "It's just a chicken sandwich. If you can't live without it, you're not a true ally. It doesn't even taste that good!!! So you're just hurting people for a some basic chicken sandwitch!!!" I'm so glad you think everything has the ability to make decisions on what to eat like that, that there couldnt possible be any reason, that maybe thats all there is around some people. I'm disabled, I can not cook most of the time, and i can't pay for my own food most of the time and even when I can options are extremely limited because I'm dead broke and disabled. There is a demon chicken place near me and the salads are higher quality than the ones at McDonald's if they even carry salads anymore. So sorry for eating a dirty chicken sandwich when there are times I can't even buy an item I want when I AM paying because the abled person with me decided to be controlling. So sorry I buy the Demon chicken because it's what's on the way home that isn't the over priced local place with a thousand mile line. So sorry not everyone can fucking cook at home.

*hugs* I hate how many times that post came up on my dash. This is exactly the case with food franchise joints– it's a matter of access, especially for poor and disabled people. I'll never understand people who're like "yeah yeah no ethical consumption under capitalism EXCEPT for <cherry picked example of mass consumption>".

Ngl, "demon chicken" made me laugh. 😂

We don't have Chick-fil-A in my country, and fast food is an expensive treat for us, but I know that they're aimed at a lower earning, overworked class demographic in the West. I have a really difficult relationship with making food choices and feeding myself, especially when I'm in a flare or stressed out or really depressed and will live off literally anything that will deliver cheap enough or on my way home, which are not a lot of choices given that I live in Bumfuck, Suburbia.

But also like....why are these people singling Chick-fil-A and not Nestlé or Coca Cola or child slavery chocolate or Chiquita or or or. My country's main exports are tea, coffee, textiles and spices. Do y'all know how those workers are treated? Which multinationals send refuse back to dump in our country, so that our soil and water are poisoned and our people die from disease? Why is funding homophobic lobbies in the West worse than literally killing BIPOC (with death squads in Nestlé's case)? That's what I think about every single time I see those posts. That my people's deaths are unavoidable, but if everyone doesn't make an exception for this one brand or issue, then we're all --phobes and --ists who don't care. And what's special about that issue? It also impacts white people in the West. The minute white middle class folks are affected it becomes an international emergency.

And yeah, the BIPOC also affected can ride in on those coat tails, but they're not gonna benefit from white allyship. They'll be trotted out to buttress their talking points when it's convenient and then promptly forgotten about and left just as disenfranchised once the white middle class element get theirs. "But it affects me and I'm not white!" and yet they're the only reason you're able to choose guilting and shaming as your advocacy tactic. If guilting and shaming worked for Black, brown and working class people's issues we wouldn't have half our problems. The reason we don't choose that approach is because it has never in the history of activism worked. The reason it's specifically a white middle class tactic is that they're so used to the world bending down for them that they can't fathom that it won't once they're part of a marginalised group. That, and it does work– on people as or more vulnerable than they are. Shaming and guilting and ostracizing is about the illusion of power, not emancipation. Emancipation involves solidarity building, mutual aid, education and harm reduction. The current state of leftism in the West can be blamed directly on the fact that middle class whites found themselves sharing socio-economic oppressions with BIPOC (always overrepresented in the working class) and immediately pushed themselves to the forefront of every issue. And then Western BIPOC absorbed all that hyperindividualist neoliberalism and respectability politics.

Eat your fill of whatever food you can procure, friend. The demons aren't in the chicken. They're in the system that overworks and underpays people, guts disabled and social welfare, plan your cities so that all you can reach are chain stores, and prices out the rest of the competition. They're in the legislative system where it's legal to create and fund lobbies to take away human rights.

#white liberals #homophobia #western leftists #ableism #disability #us politics #Tumblr culture #consumer activism #neoliberalism #individualism #white people #white privilege #white queers #social justice #asks #anon #knee of huss

[yikes-xander]

000:00:00:00

PLAYLIST ANALYSIS

This is actually me just rambling about my thoughts on each song and why I chose them for this specific playlist rather than like.. an actually good and smart sounding in-depth analysis sorry :/

When I Met You - Ethan Nestor

There are many reasons I chose this one! Mostly the lyrics, but Ethan also sings it so it’s extra fitting for the playlist, especially as the opener.

“When I met you my life was blue, I was so lonely / You took me by surprise” The channel came into my life at the perfect time. I was feeling low, in my last year of high school, struggling with thoughts about the future. It especially helped me through quarantine. Every day I felt like quitting, giving up on putting effort into school/not graduating, but I had something to look forward to every day too, so I pushed through.

“Now you're gone from my life / I'm adrift on the sea” Once the stream ended and the channel was gone, I didn’t know how I felt. I felt sad, but also something I’ve never felt before. After watching Ethan’s video yesterday, hearing him explain he felt the same way, I felt so relieved. I think this lyric kind of describes how I feel now honestly, just kinda numb? Like I’m lost. I’m working on it.

Another Night - Story Untold

More of a light-hearted one now! To me, this song made me think about how good it felt to be a part of the audience.

“Here we go for another night / Another night goofing all around” Everyone (the audience, Mark, Ethan, etc.) having fun every single day? *chefs kiss*

“Laughing 'til our stomachs hurt / And I can't let this moment pass me by” Once again, made me think of all the good times that were a part of the channel, and all the good feelings they gave me.

“So here’s to a night we’ll remember / This is a time we never wanna forget” I think this is kind of self-explanatory? I don’t think any of us want to forget Unus Annus. Personally, it’s literally the best thing I’ve ever had the chance to see happen and be a part of.

100 Bad Days - AJR

This song just gives me good vibes, UA gave me good vibes, it had to be on the playlist. I don’t have much else to say about it.

History - One Direction

This song kind of reminds me of Ethan and Mark separately and UA as a whole. Because like,, they make a great team, they have a lot of history (friends for a long time, Ethan was a fan of Mark before that, etc.)

“You and me got a whole lot of history / So don't let it go, we can make some more, we can live forever” A year is a long time but also feels like no time at all. Sometimes I wish we had more time for UA, but I’m glad I was here for what we got.

“This is not the end” Unus Annus is something I’ll never forget.

Dopamine - With Confidence

Maybe also kind of self-explanatory? Dopamine makes you feel good!! UA also makes me feel good. And the song talks about losing it too so.. yeah

This Is Home - Cavetown

I’m not exactly sure why I felt so drawn to this? But the vibes are immaculate.

“Are you dead? / Sometimes I think I'm dead / 'Cause I can feel ghosts and ghouls wrapping my head / But I don't wanna fall asleep just yet” after the stream vibes anyone? Or is it just me? I stayed up way too long after it was over. Too many thoughts head full

“Time is / Slowly / Tracing his face / But strangely he feels at home in this place” Unus and Annus,, the Boys of Time babey!!

Ghost Of You - 5 Seconds of Summer

Again.. The VIBES are IMMACULATE. It’s just a sad song for a sad time.

“Too young, too dumb / To know things like love” I’m just a stupid boy who got emotionally attached to a channel whose whole purpose was to DIE and I’m sensitive about it.

All I Wanted - Paramore

Lyrics make me do a Think

“Wake up early to black and white re-runs” colors of the channel,, thinking about all the vids,, the memories :(

“I could follow you to the beginning / And just to relive the start / And maybe then we'll remember to slow down / At all of our favorite parts” this entire verse?? Oh my god. Absolutely *chefs kiss* I think we all know what I mean and like,, why it gives me UA vibes

The Kids from Yesterday - My Chemical Romance

This song just gives me like sad nostalgic vibes so I thought it fit well.

“... you only hear the music when your heart begins to break” the timer reaches the end and the ticking stops? Heartbreaking, that’s all

I Will Follow You into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie

Another song thats just,, sad so it fits

“Love of mine, someday you will die” we knew from the start the the channel would literally die when the clock stopped,,

“It's nothing to cry about 'cause we'll hold each other soon / In the blackest of rooms” shut up I’m mourning someone hold my hand

“I got my knuckles bruised by a lady in black” death goddess Amy vibes

I’ll Always Be Around - Waterparks

“If you died I'd hope you'd haunt me / Because you know I'd miss you bad” we all love UA so much!! And miss it a ton already

“I'd never I'd never I'd never get you off my mind” it’s always thinking about Unus Annus hours

Before You Go - Lewis Capaldi

There are multiple lyrics in this song that just make me remember we only have our memories of the channel left

“Our every moment, I start to replace / 'Cause now that they're gone, all I hear are the words that I needed to say” the vids are replaced with only memories, replayed over and over

“Well, time can heal but this won't” I’ll be sad about this forever mind ur business

“But all I can think about is seeing that look on your face” the very last moment of the stream? Amy and Mark looking at the camera, Mark’s lil smile, Ethan looking back at the clock as the last few seconds tick by? AAAAH

Scarlet Cross - Black Veil Brides

Heard this and immediately reverted back to my middle school self but that’s beside the point.

“... you can't deny / The end is coming, the end is coming” we knew from the start that the channel would die

“Will we live? / Will we die? / Just keep on saving our goodbyes” There were points where people were theorizing that the channel wouldn’t actually end, there were clips near the end where the clock reversed by a few seconds, etc. need I say more?

“Hold onto me, and I can't let go” we’re all mourning, we didn’t want to say goodbye I know I’m not the only sad one

Body - Mother Mother

This song just SCREAMS Unus and Annus vibes I think we can all agree

“I've grown tired of this body / Fall apart without me, body” Unus and Annus are just entities using Ethan and Mark’s bodies,, they know their time is up so they have to leave,, the LORE it makes sense okay leave me alone

Here Comes the End - Gerard Way (ft Judith Hill)

At this point I’m just listing lyrics that I vibe with that remind me of UA and also make me sad but that’s because I’m dumb and I don’t know how to express myself or explain my thoughts oops

“The time is running out / The days are moving fast” literally every day after each video,, seeing the clock tick down? My HEART she hurt

“The clock is moving / Hands to midnight / Can we get through this?” For me, the stream ended right at midnight so THE VIBES I was sobbing

When Can I See You Again? - Owl City

“Switch on the sky and the stars glow for you / Go see the world 'cause it’s all so brand new” this lyric remind me of the vid where they were in the desert and they just looked at the stars and had a nice talk it was so wholesome I love them

“It's been fun but now I've got to go / Life is way too short to take it slow” Unus Annus is gone but we all have to remember to live, do what you want with no regrets.

(Don’t Fear) The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult

This one is another pretty self explanatory one honestly

It’s also just a vibe like a lot of the other songs that’s all I have to say about it

Safe and Sound - Capital Cities

This song just radiates such good feelings man oof

Unus Annus felt like such a safe lil bubble for me?? Like,, Mark and Ethan did dumb shit because they WANTED TO I felt so validated like,, I also would do dumb shit if I could that probably makes no sense but I love them so it doesn’t matter

Happiest Year - Jaymes Young

This one absolutely BREAKS MY HEART

“I'm here to admit / That you were my medicine” yall,, UA was the only thing that kept me going and I'm not afraid to admit it

“Thank you for the happiest year of my life” literally the only thing that gave me serotonin oops :/

“So wake me up when they build that time machine / I want to go back” do I need to explain? Even though this year has been shitty irl, I would relive it in a heartbeat

The 3ND - Story Untold

I know this is a breakup song,, but hear me out

Some of the lyrics FIT and it’s my playlist I can do what I want shut up

“I never wanted what we had to end / But now it's over” once again,, no need to explain

“I know we had our dreams and we had plans… / That now it's time to let go” this just makes me think of the video where they talk about the video ideas they had but never filmed or just didn't post,, the CONTENT WE COULD'VE GOTTEN i'm sad

Still Remembering - AS IT IS

These boys.. My fave band of all time but also literally all their songs have immaculate vibes

“My heart's as heavy / As these nights are long” this gives me after the stream feels,, I stayed up way too long after it ended I couldn't sleep because I was sad :/

“Can you tell me what hurts more / Is it remembering or forgetting?” The whole chorus just hits me so hard man I'm so scared that I'm gonna forget unus annus because my brain is shitty even though I know I won't? I’m deadass getting a tattoo as soon as I can

Take Me Away - With Confidence

This song just makes me think about how UA was kind of an escape for me? And a lot of people yknow sometimes you just need to get your mind off of this happening around you and UA was really good for that in my opinion

The Night We Met - Lord Huron

Once again saying I would relive this year if I had the chance

Unus Annus was one of a kind, no one will ever be able to recreate it

Where’d All the Time Go? - Dr. Dog

A year sounds like such a long time but it goes by way too fast

Also I think Amy had this on her instagram story after the stream? I don't remember but THE VIBES

This December - Ricky Montgomery

Why do so many ricky montgomery songs have UA vibes? Idk

“Well, this December, I'll remember / Want you to see it when I do” UA ended in november,, we’ll remember in december and forever it FITS

“It’s just a little bit, It’s just a little bit / Lonely in this home / It’s always colder on your own'' honestly now that UA is gone there's like,, a void and I'm sad (I keep saying that but it's true so..)

When You Die - MGMT

Maybe this is the song Amy had in her story after the stream? Again,, I don’t remember

I think this one is also pretty self explanatory

Except I was feeling A LOT when the channel died but I’m glad the team was also kinda in their feels a bit yknow? It made me feel better about it

Good Times - All Time Low

“Underneath the stars we came alive / And singing to the sky just felt right / I won't forget the good times” once again,, that stargazing vid? IM CRYING all the vids gave me so much serotonin I loved them all and each day was such a good day

“I'll hate the goodbye” I don't need to explain..

“Middle fingers up, ego trip / Devil may care but we didn't mind” the chaotic vibes of the channel is what sucked me in I live for chaos that's what this lyric makes me think of

Goodnight, Travel Well - The Killers

I don't think I really need to explain this one because,, just listen to the song and you'll get it but I'll just list some fave lyrics of mine

“There's nothing I can say / There's nothing we can do now” end of the stream vibes for sure

“And all that stands between the souls release / This temporary flesh and bone / We know that it's over now” Unus and Annus vibes

Line Without a Hook - Ricky Montgomery

This is one of the songs that I hear a lot in like edits I see on twitter and stuff associated with UA and I Get It the vibes are so good the song is so good I love it

“Oh, baby, I am a wreck when I'm without you / I need you here to stay” one of my fave lyrics and also just,, makes sense I miss UA

As the World Caves In - Matt Maltese

Another song that's in a lot of edits and stuff that's also,, amazing and MAKES SENSE the vibes!!

“And here it is, our final night alive” the STREAM

“You put your finest suit on / I paint my fingernails / Oh we're going out in style babe” Our boys,, Unus and Annus in the suits and eths painted nails? An absolute LOOK

I just love this song so much its so good and makes me so sad

The End. - My Chemical Romance

This song is just So Sad

And the heart monitor beeping in the beginning?? Reminds me of the clock ticking my heart is BROKEN

If you actually read all of this? I love you!! This was 6 pages so thank you for sticking through and listening to all of my dumb thoughts

#playlist #analysis #dumb thoughts #unus annus #i wouldve formatted this better but it crashed like 3 times so i kinda gave up #also.. highly suggest actually listening to the songs #the playlist i mad eis in the playlist tag on my blog

[badbitchwhomeditates]

Who the fuck is this bitch?!

Read that again. 

The answer is complex, not simple, which is what complex means you dumb fuck ( beep language kiddo). Ok, lets try that again...

Bad Bitch Who Meditates, a 23 year old singer with dreams bigger than the world itself, which is both a good and a bad thing, we will get to the importance of duality later. Either way she´s been struck by lightning and pushed into a corner loads of times in an industry where you have to fight to be heard and seen through the smallest of cracks. And yes I might also speak about myself in third person a lot, simply because I'm practicing being the main character from all perspectives, telling my story but also making everyday feel like an adventurous movie ( therefore the narrator vibes help).

Complaining, complaning, victim mindset bla bla bla you might think, im not gonna bore you, you know that things can be quite shit and you’ve probably heard about the `struggling artist” and all of that before. 

 Lets spread some more negativity shall we ey? 

Maybe not that either, im just welcoming you in to my brain and my stream of consciousness on the journey of becoming or remaining? we shall see.

Im not gonna be here being all fairy lights and glitter in my eyes either, I am tho some days, but lately I’ve been bad, not a bitch cause I would never, slightly a bitch towards myself and I haven’t really done my meditation, its like the second I put down ” bad bitch who meditates, thats my slogan” in a song, I was like, cool its in a tune now so I’ve done the work I can relax. 

Nope, it doesn’t stop. 

Consistency in self care, healthy habits and your mental diet, the way you speak to yourself, it doesn’t stop. And its fkn annoying sometimes, especially when your chemical imbalance is so imbalanced that you don’t wanna get out of bed. Ive probably dealed with anxiety and depression since my debut on X-factor, oh yeah shit sorry, I have a name too, Im Awa and I won X-factor Sweden at 15 years old, completely changed my life like a marriage, for better or for worse. In that marriage I found myself, lost myself and now im kind of finding myself again...

Ok this is the part below where you get to knoooow me or something...

 I guess why I wanted to start blogging again is A) I need to hold myself accountable to remain consistent with my glow up, cause I can proudly say I’ve really done some amazing progress and inner work B) I need to continue doing that and find my healthy balance and not put too much pressure on myself, ya get me? C) maybe help take away the stigma regarding mental health, and I wanna focus on the solutions, thats my whole new life concept 10 % problems, 90 % solutions, like if we are discussing something thats the ratio. Cause how can we ever see a solution if we go slow dancing w the problem for ages? 

 I know it can feel fkn amazing and cozy, like when you’ve been in bed w someone thats clearly not good for your heartstrings but you stay there anyway because for right now it feels all warm and fuzzy. 

Oh silly girl, I mean forgiveness, forgiving other people and forgiving myself that is def something we are going to have to discuss as well, its one of the things I’ve tried to commit to this year. Ive come to the conclusion that its harder forgiving yourself after being too nice, theres only so much space on the scale for resentment, but you go to bed with you all the time and you beat yourself up on why you allowed that to happen? (Did that make any sense??) 

Again, another lesson, feedback that we can grow from. Mind management, one of my fav terms, mind over matter. Damn sure that can feel extremely provocative said in the wrong situation. Im gonna be honest on here, ill make an oath or whatever its called ( oh yeah im also Swedish so we will have communication problems here and there, but whatever, I call that acceptance) ill be honest, personal but not private cause I need to protect my energy. 

I would declare myself a self care queen but babe writing this, I just had a massive argument w my friend, that made me sad ( oh im a cry baby too, thats even the title of my EP lol), I hate conflict but im really trying so hard to stand up for myself and understand that my feelings are valid too and that uncomfortable situations are growing pains for our souls. I had my first panic attack in ages because this year is just shit and things that I’ve worked on for so long just crumbled down in front of me and I just felt like I was again taking two steps forward and one step back but at least we are moving. 

Im not all sad, I’ve rightfully so have had a few bad 72 hours I would say, I don’t like this time of the year that much.  But I know why, because I've been slacking w my routines, the ones we´ve carefully selected through trial and error inna real life and w my therapist ( she's real too but you get what im sayin) , it's ok not to be ok either but we have to put some kind of time limit on it so we don't sink into that deep hole again, i don't wanna go back there and I know what keeps me with my head above water and sometimes even frkn flying. We wanna stay consistent w the flying, that feels good, that's a goal now ok? Cause I used to fall into that trap of the deep hole until the pain of the known got far greater than the fear of the unknown. 

Im happy we are here today, because as I said 10/90, nothing last forever, good or bad, which is comforting. Things will get better and we hold so much more power in our minds and souls than we realize that ultimately will mirror how we experience life. So im going to be on here, at least once a week, my therapist tells me not to set up crazy goals that I know I might not do because then it will make me feel shit etc so once a week feels reasonable.

 Im open to suggestions about what we can chat about, ill share my 10/90, I want my clever friends to maybe drop a quote or blog here and there, Im good on camera, like vlogs or some shit. I probably wont bring you around all the time cause I don’t have the technological brain cells for that to be very honest with you. Maybe ill just come up with cute formats to the camera, thats a word you are going to hear a lot, ”format”, I have a concierge business w my friend Amy on the side of my music career called ” Pure Intuition”, basically we create events, formats and campaigns for brands and make them come true with the right profile etc and we create FORMATS, but if you missed it or if I was unclear Im a super cool singer signed to Columbia UK which was my childhood dream, so we are going to make Columbia our BITCH in 2021 hihi <3 <3. I studied economic entrepreneurship in college and im very business savvy, I love creating formats lol. Im slowly but surely building my fempire. What else, boys, I like boys, men, cute ” god spent some extra time on you”- looking boys, I mean men. I guess we will touch on that in the most anonymous manner, maybe ill just share some past flings cause you know, they’re in the past, passé. So yeah who the fuck is this bitch? you will find out alongside me, myself and I

get ready for the ride

love and light,

badbitchwhomeditates 

#badbitch #spiritual development #self improvement #selfcare #main character #music #singer #aestheitcs

[thelocalshooter]

The Local Shooter Vs. Kira

(LS) Goodmorning thank you being part of this great come up, and welcome, so Kira; do you mind telling us where you’re from and why it is that you do?

(K) Originally I’m from Mesa but I been all around, I initially got into making music by making beats. This was when I was living In Alexandria Virginia, I had a homie who had the same interests in music as me and we would try to create our own version of shit we were listening to. The homie actually put me on to a lot of legends in this scene We were barley walking into. Those artists consist of Lil Ugly Mane, Supasortahuman, and SpaceGhostPurrp, just to name a few. These influences really shaped the type of sounds I was using in my beats. I eventually started releasing my beats as $limKira just before I turned 18. I would promote myself on twitter a lot by posting little snippets of beats I was working on at that time. People would fuck with it and I was really social on my Twitter at that time always working making new connections, always sending out beats that type of shit, I happened to find myself in a group chat full of artists that were from a lot of different parts of the country and I just kept building from there. Eventually I turned 18 and made my way back home to Az were all this music shit for me really started and where I Progressed into becoming an artist of my own. FuccKira.

(LS) Being from Arizona how do you feel the music scene has changed in the last couple years? I know we’ve had prior interaction through Ace McCain but doing it back then I’m sure was a bit more different and definitely harder based off the fact people didn’t really have venue selections, or even ways to get music recorded, but now everyone is throwing shoes left and right! Do you think Arizona separates themselves within groups or? As far as being an east valley or west valley artist.

(K) Not too familiar with Ace McCain but I’m really close with Multiplexes out there, he pretty much took me under his wing when everything else didn’t pan out as planned, really good and genuine dude he is. But to be honest I feel like I haven’t been in Arizona in so long I can’t give an opinion on the current state of the music scene, I know when I was out there in 2017-2018 the group I was with would get shows at club red or it’d be a warehouse show and shit would be jumpin. Recording wasn’t really a problem for me cause we’d just record at a homies crib or wherever we were staying at, it’s all about the mixing lmao but a lot of bridges since then have been burned so for me now it’s really a matter of staying true and making good music. Don’t get me wrong although the Music scene in Arizona can get hectic, it is definitely full of talent no matter where your from within it or who you fuck with out there, and just for the record I have love for everyone out there It takes a lot to be an artist and to be a successful one at that and so it’s always respect from my side.

(LS) You’ve released many projects and have done a handful of shows, why do you think you’re still missing as an artist? Are you constantly elevating yourself to be greater or are you still trying to figure it out yourself?

(K) Facts, I have released many tracks but they’re not anything I would say I’m proud of and that’s why I’m missing as an artist because I’m still trying to figure out what music I love making. I haven't truly focused on only myself or my own progression with my music and that’s another reason why I feel I’m still missing as an artist, my confidence behind each track needs to be 100% in order for me to drop and feel good about it. That’s why most of my tracks are on private and I’ve only got 3 tracks on my SoundCloud currently . They need to be worth listening. I want people to hear my music and want the next track immediately. Shows are always fun and give people a way of seeing a face behind the music, my experience with shows has taught me it really brings a better connection with your audience/fanbase when your up there performing what they been bumping on their own time, that was a big favorite of mine out there was seeing the energy at each show. I remember waking up the next day after my first show with my whole body sore ready to schedule the next one. As far as the question goes I’m still trynna figure myself out as an artist, but progress is definitely being made. I’m always looking to make a better track than my last, so I would also say it’s a goal of mine to continue to exceed my own Expectations.

(LS) What the next move? You currently dropped “Voodoo” (https://soundcloud.com/fucckira/voodoo-prod-srry ) over 48 hours ago, now do you plan on doing any visuals or are you already back in the booth?

(K) A visual would be cool for the track, I might look into getting one made for it if the track continues to do well. Visuals are 2nd to my priority when it comes to what I’m trynna do right now. Actually releasing quality music is my main focus right now but like I said I’d be down to do a video, I actually know a couple people that can get that done. As far as any new music I do have a song ready to release prod. rose (my lil bro) , it’s wild my lil bro watched me do all this shit as a kid and now he’s making beats for other artists and myself. Deadass makes better beats than I ever did and he makes em off his phone lmaoo fuck a beat pad kids only 15 too. No doubt in my mind he’s gonna be successful. Lil dude is already building connections wit people on his own it’s only a matter of time.

K- Goals for me this year is to really gain and maintain a steady fan base. Thats something I’ve always strived for and wanted, I love when people give me feedback on how the songs make them feel, like I said energy is a big thing for me. I also would like to finally figure myself out as an artist and find my own sound I feel like I’m on my way there. Besides music I fuck with clothes heavy my homie Albert owns a brand out there called Macabre, fuckin ridiculous. I don’t own a single shirt that doesn’t say macabre. Anyway I would be down to do modeling for any upcoming clothing designers or any street wear brands. I’ve done it in the past for Garza out in AZ, (idk if your familiar) but it’s pretty cool would love more opportunities like that from other designers/brands.

(LS) With music being a main focus for you I’m sure it has a heavy impact on your life, when do you first remember falling in love with music? Was it a certain track? A certain time in your life?

K- I remember the first major thing I did for

music was use the money I had saved up for a

car to buy a new computer to make music on

because my laptop had completely died. Had to use my skate board to get everywhere until I turned 18 and got a car lmao. During this time in my life my parents trust in me was at 0 so I pretty much was secluded to my room most of the time making beats and getting high. Music was all I had when I felt I had nothing so I believe buying that computer was a pretty fuckin good decision. Just wish I coulda used Uber back then lmao

(LS) As an artist, do you find it difficult to work with other artist? Especially other local artist? Being that everyone in Arizona has their own sound, do you usually go out of state for collabs or how does that work?

K- working with other artist isn’t hard at all. I’m very straight forward when it comes to the music ima be working on. If I dont fuck with it I’ll tell you and try to find something I can get a hit with us both on. As far as Collabs go I don’t like doing them if I’m being honest. Reason being I just truly believe I’m better off on my own shit UNLESS the energy is right. If we in the Stu and everything is going right and the engineer knows what he’s doing and everythings organic then fuck yeah that’s a collab ima fuck with. Dont get me wrong I still got collabs on the way. matter of fact I have a few with some artist out of El Paso, TX

Chris Apex , Saybien and Jesse Commas just to name a few.

(LS) Are you looking to stay independent? Or to sign a deal one day? What’s your game plan as far as career wise? And why? Which do you think will help you more in the long run?

K- I wouldn’t be opposed to signing a deal one day but the freedom of being an independent artists is something that would be hard to give up. I’m really early in this scene as far as being an artist so for now I’m just focused on releasing quality music and gaining a loyal fan base. I feel if my supporters are behind me with every track I drop it’s bound to bring me more opportunities in the future.

(LS) Making music for over 5 years already, what’s are some tips or struggles you faced as an artist you’d like to let new up and coming artist know? Any motivation you can give knowing how hard the grind is?

K- lmao don’t join any groups. Stick to yourself. Be transparent and be consistent! Don’t be scared to be social either that’s how you build connections. When I first started I would send beats to MY favorite artists for ex. Supasortahuman was one of the first artist to follow me back and support my music by telling me through dm. That was wild to me because like I said previously he was an inspiration for me when I was barley starting making beats. For him to tell me he fucks with my music and he keeps up with me really gave me the motivation to keep making music and sending it out.You never know. Shouts out sortahuman too he still supporting the music I make as an artist.

(LS) Thank you again for being apart of this great come up and is there any last things you’d like to mention to the viewers? And links you wanna add where they can check out your music or even contact you? Much love Kira!

(K) Viewers can keep up with me through my social media’s!

Instagram.com/fucckira

Twitter.com/fucckira

Also my Music Links:

SoundCloud.com/fucckira

Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/artist/fucckira/1485190577

Spotify:

https://open.spotify.com/artist/0brnKNJ2UDC6e4dAOXU6YN?si=mx245oXGTEO6WtaBlRLK3Q

Thank you for the opportunity to let y’all know a little bit about me and what my goals are looking like this year. I appreciate all the love and support. More music coming soon!

[notwxrriors]

You wanna break down “let me down easy” verse by verse like you talked about? Cause I wanna read it

yeAH i do actually, thank u !!!! im pumped!!!!

this song is a bit over 5 minutes long and it is SO GOOD, holy FUCK, here’s the link to it if u wanna listen to it bc i meAN IT

i really love this song for awtto. i think it captures a lot of their relationship, the feelings of being young and a little outcasted but finding someone who understands you, even if things are a bit strange. anyway. let’s get into it

the way i’m analysing this song is Not what the song is written about, obviously, but music is meant to have many meanings and i love the meanings this song can have.

“You want someone to want you for who you are I want someone to try, then let me down easy, easy tonight Easy, easy tonight“

the first line is so otto @ awsten,,, it feels really tongue-in-cheek, about how aws always wants to be Different. i sorta feel like the song goes through the years that they know each other, so it’d start at the very beginning, with scene aws and them starting to get to become familiar with one another, start having deeper conversations, esp about romantic stuff. to “want someone to try, then let me down easy” is kinda like...otto just accepting that this isn’t going to last. it’s a one night thing, and that’s okay.

“Honey, it’s no secret that with matters of the heart I’m reserved, I’m irrational and rarely ever start But since the world’s dark and often inhumane Relish our condition, come drinking in the rain”

THOSE FIRST TWO LINES...SO otto. the awkwardness he has, especially with awsten, he just...doesn’t try. but the next two are a bit more optimistic, maybe a bit of aws rubbing off on him

“‘Cause you remember when, after Paris We all decided the best way to fight it was Drink wine, dance here and pray And make love that lasts with a vengeance”

i don’t think paris is a particular thing here, it’s sorta more the concept of traveling together, getting into messes, falling in love and trying to not fall in love. also they fuck, so,

“So you can join the cowards all aboard the outrage train You can stay afraid, or slit the throat of fear and be brave And scratch the little itch 'til you’re moving like a motherfucker Up in this bitch”

i love this verse. the subtle aggression in it, the being done with being closeted/secret in this situation. otto trying to get awsten out of whatever shell he’s put himself in, telling him he can stay scared or get over it

“You wanted to fight for a cause Then go out and fall in love Don’t stop, don’t stop believing In truth and grace in the grievance”

another sorta jab at awsten tbh, wanting to fight for a cause and all that. teenage rebellion. but isn’t the biggest rebellion, in conservative ass texas, loving another man openly? freely? truth and grace in the grievance is a lil self-explanatory in this context, just keep believing in whatever cause you’re fighting for even if it’s hard

“So look at me and tell me what I already know That I trialled and I failed and it’s good to let it go Sometimes life sucks, everything is lame Not everything’s as easy as making lemonade”

i loVE these first two lines. it’s like “yeah, you screwed up, but that’s okay. just keep moving on”, that’s a very awsten headspace and he’d love to remind otto that he’s not just his mistakes. the next two lines are jus cute

“And so dismembering our state of balance With lust requited, a gaze undivided With a cool mind and warmth in your face A good heart, a grace under pressure”

this is. so gorgeous. just commentary on awsten, really. “warmth in your face” is so Cute considering how rosy aws always is, and a good heart and grace under pressure (see: chorus)

“You give me a good reason to be heartsick again To be here, to be strong, to be oddly and boldly estranged From the loss and bitter years I found myself descending into tedium and fear”

maybe my favorite verse in this whole fuckin song?? in this context, awsten giving him a reason to be strong and bold, to be heartsick again. to love him. from the “loss and bitter years” of being younger, of guilt and shame around sexuality, and awsten just...helps him come to terms to it, even if it hurts sometimes, even if they dont ever actually date

“If it’s late, you’re drunk and wanting A reason, some reason to live I always, I always say Just put on some Whitesnake”

aws and otto both don’t drink, so the alcohol refs in this song are sorta moot, but i think by here we’ve moved into more recent times with them (and honestly this falls in well w the c**r* thing, like this verse takes place right after theyve broken up). awsten’s...worse, honestly, mental-health wise, but otto’s always his comfort person. he calls otto when they’re not together, and they stay on the phone long into the night, sometimes without even talking, just soft music playing from one of their ends

“Honey, it’s no secret that I’ve been losing my way In the weirdest of moments and the stupidest of ways But hey, I’m still young and it’s gonna be okay I got solipsism, baby, and I brought lemonade”

and hell, maybe otto isn’t doing too well, either. it comes in different ways than awsten’s. and the third line is so sweet, that optimism that wasn’t there at the beginning is now present and he’s using it to help aws this time instead of vise versa.

“I’ll surrender then, all my balance And be excited and drink to tonight It’s not a, a bad time, time spent with you There’s cool lights and songs with good lyrics”

seeing each other again in a romantic context, after a few years of awsten’s ex. awsten’s in houston, otto’s with him, and they’re alone. it’s like being barely-adults again, and otto lets down those walls he’s been building the past few years, and things settle right back into place

“We never have to talk again, whatever, up to you But since you’re putting up with me Here’s another toast just to you Let’s dance, off the beat Then mosey out together and say goodbye on the street”

the thought of awsten “putting up with” otto is sorta laughable, considering their respective personalities, but sometimes otto really does feel like that. also, them dancing together is a VERY sweet thought, and seperating at the end of the night like they’ve done many times before, feeling okay about it

“Don’t stop, don’t stop believing In truth and personal freedom I want someone to want me for who I am I want someone to try, or let me down easy, easy tonight”

the last chorus is a bit different. instead of “grace and the grievance”, we’ve developed into “personal freedom”, and thats. fuckin beautiful, honestly, with aws getting out of his last relationship and he and otto rekindling things again. and for otto, “i want someone to want me for who i am”, is a bit of a realization that maybe awsten is the only one who does. i think it’s kinda on brand though, to still feel like someone has to try with him, and that he’s going to be let down, even all these years later.

#ask #its so LONG #ao #still cant put read mores on asks cool #thanks

[thedeadflag]

Hey, pretty soon I'll be playing a friend of mine is gonna be DMing Tyranny Of Dragons for me and a couple of friends, and I can't decide whether I should play a Monk (probably Open Hand, maybe Kensei) or a Ranger (either Beastmaster or Horizon Walker), 'cause I've never played either of those classes, nor has anyone at the tables I've played. Can you tell me a little about your experiences with these classes?

The Ranger has been one of my favourite classes throughout the editions of D&D in terms of flavour, and I’ve had some fun with monks as well. In 5th edition, both took a fair bit of a hit in utility (individual and within group dynamics) and power at pretty much all ranges. The Ranger was propped back up a little bit in Unearthed Arcana in the revised ranger archetype, but both are still largely considered at best middle of the road classes, and at worst, the lowest tier of classes in the game in utility and character. 

That’s not to say they can’t be fun and have a lot of flavour, and still find use. If you’ve watched Critical Role, you can see Vex and Beau weren’t useless by any stretch. No class is junk in 5e due to the improved parity compared to some past editions. So power and utility aside, if you feel drawn to any class/subclass, and you want to dive into its particular brand of flavour, then I say go for it. I would gauge the rest of the party’s makeup in making your decision, because group synergy is important, but you have to make yourself happy, too, right?

Anywho, I’ll break down my take on both.

When it comes to Monks, I like Open Hand the best. If you want to have a Monk-style gameplay with weapons, then Mystic or Fighter are probably better options with some more flair and utility involved than Kensei imo, but if that’s the route you want to take, it’d be alright. However, Open Hand has quivering palm, which is pretty incredible late game as far as damage and flexible timing from a single person through 3 ki pts and an action. If you do ever reach level 17, I would recommend multiclassing after that if you’re allowed, since the rest of the Monk’s class progression is kind of junk in comparison, and it could use some much needed utility from 3 levels of another class. Anywho, I like open hand not just for the flavor of being a class that’s capable of being an unarmed beast in battle, but also because of the way it can work in alignment with fighters who can also control the battlefield, like any fighter with a sentinel/polearm master. The ability to shove an enemy up to 15ft with one of your flurry attacks, launching them into the range of a fighter who gets a free opp attack against them and can from then on lock down their movement with a successful hit? That can be an excellent tag team. The Monk isn’t excellent for utility, but the Open Hand technique is probably the best at providing utility in combat among all the monk disciplines. Like, another option after hitting with flurry of blows is to steal all reactions for the opponent until the end of your next turn. This can be especially helpful against casters, as stealing reactions = preventing counterspells. And Monks can get a lot of attacks = lots of attempts to disrupt concentration of enemy casters, so the open hand monk is especially helpful at being a designated mage wrecker with having the mobility to reach casters and the ability to destabilize them. It’s arguably the one thing (aside from unarmed damage) that (this one kind of) monks do better than just about anyone else, arguably.

Now, to Rangers.

Honestly, I don’t like beast-focused Rangers. I think they’re a lot of work in order to get the mechanical payoff most other classes can achieve without a lot of thought or effort. Generally, any class that can let me focus more on flavour and RP is one I’m going to prefer, and beast master’s just…unwieldy. A lot of people say the class is junk, and if you run it without getting into the headspace for optimizing, it’s probably going to be more of a frustrating experience than you’d have hoped for. With BMs, you’re managing not just your character, but your companion, and you have to keep up with the different mechanics of both, you need to be 100% on top of choices made while leveling up, you need to have a strong understanding of battlefield control and your companion’s capabilities from the get go, and you really ought to be the kind of player who is happy to take a backseat to everyone else in and out of combat because the way you’ll shine is by helping everyone else do what they do with a little bit higher odds of success than otherwise. Personally, I like playing that sort of character, but I can do all of that with other classes a lot easier, and usually better, so this isn’t the kind of archetype I’d choose for a character myself. If you really want to, and think it’s cool, go for it, though.

The first thing I’d do is ask if you can use the UA revised ranger instead of the PHB ranger if you’re going the beast route (it’s “beast conclave” archetype in UA). If your DM allows that and insists you choose your companion from the list provided here, take the wolf (pack tactics is v helpful, same with 40ft speed and being able to send enemies prone after attacking) or ape (climb 30ft, melee/ranged ability, good stat baselines). 

The second thing you’ll need is to lock down a quality companion, and that can take a bit of wheeling and dealing with your DM to let you use one of the supplementary books as a source, which is especially necessary if you’re not able to use the revised ranger class from UA. You do not want a hawk, mastiff, or panther, the PHB offers some shit examples out of the gate (panther and hawk are only conditionally good if you’re only ever going to have your companion rushing around the map using the ‘help’ action, or scouting to some extent, and the latter becomes less useful and reliable the higher level you become). Don’t choose a CR 0 companion, or one under ¼. If you absolutely must use a hawk for character flavor, then a blood hawk that at least has pack tactics would be a must. But if you are hoping for a companion that can do damage, look for something with certain damage if it hits, like added poison damage. Look for good AC if you want a tank. Look for versatility in mobility and senses. Look for special abilities (the boar having a relentless ability where it’ll go back to 1HP if it falls below 0; the wolf spider has web walk and web sense which can really help with casters using web if players don’t want to wade into the difficult terrain or are having difficulty finding enemies caught in the web; etc.)

But yeah, beast-focused rangers  will be best when they’re spamming the help action with their beasts, using their beasts to get enemies out of cover, using their beasts to help control the field and give others advantage/take advantage, etc. You need to be quick mentally to know what you want to do with your character and your companion each time your turn comes around (most DMs, myself included, aren’t going to let you have as much time as you need to figure out what you want to do on both fronts, so if you can’t juggle two characters at once without losing a step, it might not be the archetype for you). This type of ranger requires you to know exactly what you want to be able to accomplish for yourself and your party right out of the gate, so you’ll want to gauge what your party members will be specializing in, what they want to be able to do, and see if there’s a way to shape your ranger to aid in that, particularly in choosing a beast that can be the most effective in ensuring that. Group cohesion is the name of the game with this form of ranger, so you’ll want to consider race selection a part of this process, too. I’ve had one player bomb hard as a BM and re-roll a different ranger, and I’ve had a friend who ran one who was the group’s unsung hero a lot of the time during their campaign. If you’re looking at Vex from CR as inspiration, keep in mind she had an excellent set of stats from lvl 9 onwards, and plenty of magical weapons to make up for much of any class shortcomings as characters scale up…look at how often Trinket was useful (very rarely) and understand that the bear was essentially just flavour for most of the campaign, and Vex would have been considerable underpowered compared to the rest of the party if not for some considerable DM intervention in ways that make things a lot trickier for DMs (adding magical weapons/items can easily unbalance a campaign, and it’s a matter of experience in knowing how to dole them out without throwing balance aside…Matt Mercer’s comfortable handing out flying carpets and multiple +2AC items  and superpowered magical weapons by level 9, I wouldn’t give them out before level 14 or 15 and it would really only be if a player was severely struggling and refused to re-roll a more appropriate character while dying or nearly dying most combats). Other classes and archetypes have features and abilities that scale as you level, some earn specific spells as they level up that others can’t get, etc., but with beast conclave rangers, it’s their beast that slightly improves in a few meaningful ways. So if you’re going that route, you need to commit to a great beasts that’s a great fit for you and your party, and you need to commit to making the absolute most out of them and knowing how to make the most out of them.

Horizon Walker’s a simpler archetype that has some badass spells, but the flavour for the class can be a bit…strange in some adventures. It might not fit well with Tyranny of Dragons, I’m not sure how much planar travel’s involved in that adventure. Which might not be a problem for the DM, or you. I still prefer the UA ranger conclaves, but out of the PHB ones, this one’s probably the best of the bunch, even if it’s mostly going to lean towards being a melee build (which, again, check your party comp to see if that’s something that is workable). 

Anywho, those are my late night D&D ramblings. You can take my words with a grain of salt if you’d like, and as always the rule of cool applies…if you think it’s cool and you really want to go with something, go for it and I hope the DM will find a way to help you make it work, but yeah, these classes can be a bit of an uphill battle, though I suppose potentially a rewarding challenge if that’s what you’re looking for.

Best of luck with the campaign, I’m sure you’ll have fun! 

#d&d #long post #Anons

[thefinny-d]

Sound The Alarm

Tagging: Finn & Rachel Location: Finn & Rachel’s Apartment Notes: When things go south between Rachel, Taylor and Jeremy, Finn is left feeling stuck in the middle of it all.

Finn sighed as he headed out of the hospital, done with work for the day. He had an insanely early shift and he knew that he just wanted to get home and make the most of the rest of the day before he headed to bed. When he glanced at his phone as he walked to his car, his brows immediately furrowed in confusion when he saw the texts he had recieved from both Taylor and Jeremy. Hate to put you in the middle man but tell Rachel we're done. I don't know what's going on with her but clearly her "fame" has gone to her head. What the hell was going on? Finn knew that the three of them had a meeting with their label that morning but it was obvious that something had gone very, very wrong. He quickly texted them back asking for more details before he got into his car and headed home, hoping that his fiance would be there when he arrived. Finn made his way into the apartment building, looking at his phone when he saw that Taylor had texted him back. Ask her. Look, me and Jeremy aren't mad at you but we're done with Rachel, okay? We'll fill you in when we see you for PUBG night on Friday. A sigh escaped Finn's lips and he rolled his eyes, knowing that whatever fight that had all gotten into that he really, really didn't want to deal with it. Especially when he was sure that it was over something stupid like one of them making a dumb joke. When he got back to the apartment, Finn headed inside slowly. "Rach?" he called out. "I'm home. I got some texts from Taylor and Jeremy... is everything okay?" While he really did hope it was just something stupid, he had a bad feeling that it was more than that. He had a bad feeling that this was a situation that wasn't just going to disappear overnight.

Rachel was more than confused. And the confusion just made way to frustration. She had no idea what the meeting was about before she had gone into it, and it wasn't her fault that the label wanted to take a completely different direction. She hadn't even said anything before Taylor and Jeremy were immediately jumping down her throat and they were causing havoc at the meeting. She tried to talk it out, she did, but her words kept getting twisted, and well, she wasn't going to say no to someone trying to get her involved in bigger projects with bigger artists, concentrating on her -- not the three of them. It was never about the three of them -- it started off as just her making her way through this and she had gone through many different band members. She could just as easily do it without Taylor and Jeremy if she wanted to. The meeting was horrible -- and she was just pissed off when they walked out of the meeting. "So, are you in or are you out?" Her manager asked, Rachel sighing as they pushed papers in front of her. "Yeah. Fuck them." She said, her reading over the paper in front of her. When she got home, she wasn't sure how long she had been pacing around the room, but she was pissed. And when Finn walked in the apartment, she moved more towards him, her just staring at him for a moment. "No. Everything isn't okay actually because they're assholes." She said a little too loudly, her anger still clearly built up. "They're jerks and they fucked themselves over, so it's their own fault that they did what they did. Fuck everything to do with them. I'm doing this shit on my own if they're going to be dicks about change happening. It's not my fault." She ranted, her groaning and rubbing her hand through her hair. "I'm so fucking pissed off. I'm happy for myself because I just agreed to a lot of amazing shit. But they had to fucking ruin it all."

Finn could tell immediately as he looked into Rachel's eyes that the fight with Taylor and Jeremy clearly wasn't something stupid - it was serious. God, he really hated being in the middle but he knew there was nothing he could do to avoid it in this case. As she began to rant, he could tell that she was getting worked up once more and he knew that whatever had happened was terrible. "I - okay, okay, baby, you need to slow down," he said softly as he moved his hands to rest gently on her shoulders, him rubbing them gently as he stepped closer to her. "First of all, I love you and you look really beautiful right now," he started, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to her lips before he pulled away. He ran his hands from her shoulders down along her arms before he took her hands in his, a small smile on his face as he looked into her eyes. "So... the change thats happening at the label - it's a good thing? I mean, a good thing for you is always awesome to me. But - what do Taylor and Jeremy have to do with this? What happened?" The last thing that Finn wanted to happen was for Rachel to fight with the two guys who were both of their closest friends. They had been there for Rachel for so much and he knew he would always be grateful for them, especially during the times when they had been struggling with all the Josh stuff. "What stuff did you agree to? And... and is this stuff that they're just going to have to go along with?" He didn't want Rachel to get even more angry talking about the situation but he needed to figure out what was going on so he could fix it. God, he needed to fix this because he knew being in the middle of this fight wasn't going to be fun whatsoever.

Rachel looked into his eyes as he complimented her and kept his hands on her shoulders, trying to calm her down. "I get you're trying to calm me down but I don't really think it's going to work right now." She said, her looking up at him. She was glad that he was trying to at least make sense of stuff -- she knew that things were bad and she was just rambling about stupid shit and he probably wanted to know exactly what was going on. "Well, I didn't know what the fuck the meeting was about so we just sat down and the label wants to go a different route and like... it's not about them. This whole thing started off because of me. I hired Taylor and Jeremy and I picked them because I thought they'd be a good fit for me and they were. So the label wants to go bigger and it's not like it's Taylor Jeremy and Rachel as the artist on the albums. It's me. Not them. So they wanted to go bigger and change it up so people don't get bored and we need to go more mainstream and pop and they just jumped down my throat like it was my idea. It wasn't mine." She said, looking up at him when she realized she was getting worked up again. "Sorry. They were giving me more of the pay because they're concentrating on me. Not them. They walked out and said I was a fame hungry bitch, which you have to be in this business to succeed and they said they were done so I signed my own contract." She said, looking away for a moment. "I'm not doing this shit with them if they don't want to. If they can't take the fact that they can't be right beside be forever, then it's not my fault. In my label's eyes they're replaceable so it doesn't matter anymore. It's done. Their contracts are void so they'll get whatever they're due and that's it. They're done and I'm going the way I want to go. Without them. And if they're going to be dicks about it, then I'm not fucking around with stupid shit."

Finn raised his eyebrows as Rachel spoke. Hearing her say that Taylor and Jeremy were replacable and that everything started because of her was something that made him completely speechless. While Rachel was insanely talented all on her own, her bond with Taylor and Jeremy and the musical chemistry that they all had together was something that made everyone notice them. It was what had gotten all of them to where they were. "Mainstream and pop?" he asked softly. While he knew she had always had some songs that were a bit more on the pop side, he also knew that she tried to do something original and stay true to herself. It worried him to think of her being forced to do mainstream music and having her label take too much control. "I understand that it wasn't your idea. I know that... that music labels have a lot of say in the situation but I - baby, I can understand why they're upset. I mean... they love you and they love working with you. It probably hurt their feelings to think that you would do this whole thing without them." Finn looked down for a moment and sighed and he knew that things in their lives were going to get crazy whether they wanted them to or not. "If this is the way you want to go then... then of course I support you. I'm proud of you for doing so well," he said softly. "It just sucks that this is causing the three of you to fight." Finn looked down at his hand that was holding Rachel's and sighed as he ran his thumb over her engagement ring before he brought his gaze back up to meet hers and forced a small smile. "Well, you signed your own contract today. So that's pretty cool," he said softly. "What's the next step? What do - what do they want you to do?" Finn knew this meant she was going to be recording and afterwards traveling and while he obviously was proud of her and in total support of her career, thinking of her going on a tour without Taylor and Jeremy concerned him more than he wanted to admit.

Rachel shook her head for a moment, looking tot he side. "This wasn't supposed to be me doing it without them. They were still going to be in the band but they were going to just not be in bigger things like interviews and they would be directly in music videos, it would be me. They just were taking a little backseat. That was all. They were getting less but we'd be doing so much with brand deals and with bigger artists and they'd get paid ten times more." She said, groaning as she felt herself getting annoyed again. "They're just being assholes. It's stupid that they're making some huge deal out of this when I'd still have them involved in everything. And yeah. I signed my own contract and I'm happy you're proud of me and everything but the good day I'm supposed to be having is fucking ruined because they're assholes." She said, looking down at their hands for a moment. "I don't know, they just want me to get more into my work. I've already been writing, they're just going to read over stuff and see what we can do. Put a single out really quickly and then put another one out and get an album recorded. I have another meeting in a couple of days. It's just going to be a lot of me working with other people. A lot of features. But we'll see what comes. It's just... this is really it for me, you know?" She said, looking up at him and sighing softly. "This is me making a real name for myself and yeah maybe... maybe it's more mainstream than I want to be but it'll get my name out there and then I can do whatever the fuck I want after I have that big fan base. It's just creating more opportunities. The label wants it to be big. Like... way bigger than before. Which I'm all for, obviously. I'll do whatever they want me to." She said, biting down on her bottom lip for a moment. "I know I already got my dream -- performing anywhere is enough for me. But this is really it. I know we have plenty of money to get a house and get out of this apartment but once we get this shit out and we have time we can just... we can have our own home and we'll be married and it'll just be everything we wanted. Then maybe things can calm down for a while."

Finn sighed softly. "I don't know, Rach. I can't tell you why they felt the way they did about everything. If you want me to, I can try and talk to them when I see them on Friday" he told her. As she spoke, saying that this was really it for her, Finn couldn't help but smile as he looked down at her. She had come so far from the days of singing in crappy little bars and he knew that this really was an opportunity that was going to change everything. He just hoped that change would be for the better. "Our own home and being married - I definitely like the sound of that," he said softly. Finn pulled away from Rachel slightly before he stepped further into the apartment, still processing everything that had happened all while he had been at work. "I know that... that today came with a lot of good and a lot of bad because of what happened with them but as long as you feel good about what you're doing with your career then I'm right here to support you," he said as he slipped off his shoes and undid one of the buttons on his shirt, relieved to just be home after work. Finn turned to face his girlfriend once more, him sitting on the arm of the couch and offering her a small smile. "The only thing that I want to make sure of is that your music stays yours, you know what I mean? I - I don't want this label to think that they can step in and change you. What makes you so special is your sound and your lyrics. Especially the ones about me." A teasing smile formed on his face, hoping that he was helping her feel better about everything somehow. A part of him knew that she was broken up about losing Taylor and Jeremy even if she wouldn't admit it and he knew he would make it his mission to repair it all. He would fix it, he knew he would. "Does this whole thing mean that I'm going to be waking up in the middle of the night to you writing again?" he asked her playfully. The small smile on his face fell, however, the second he thought about the whole tour thing again and he couldn't help but feel worried imagining his girlfriend on tour alone. In places with alcohol alone. God, he knew she had struggled with a relapse and he just hoped desperately that she could stay strong. "Are you gonna have to go on another tour again?" he asked her. "I know our relationship is like... built on reunion sex at this point but I was kind of really liking the whole normal every day couple stuff," he said with a soft laugh. "It's crazy how just thinking about you being away already makes me miss you."

Rachel simply shrugged at his words. "You can talk to them, but I really don't think they're going to be interested in figuring shit out. Like, I've seen them upset and mad before, but I've never really seen them like that. But it's their problem too. They're not even giving anything a chance. They just disregarded everything the whole entire team had to say." She knew that it was a huge change, but there was no way that she'd pass up an opportunity to get even bigger and to experience all of the new music and the new deals. "The music will stay mine. And if anything, it'll just be produced better. I know it'll sound a little different, but it's going to be so good. I know it is." She said as she looked over at him, a small smile rising on her lips. "And I promise, the songs will definitely still be about you," She teased gently. Rachel was sure that she'd be up at odd hours to be able to write, but she knew it was something that she actually enjoyed. The only thing she worried about was waking Finn, but she could remember nights where he was just laying there watching her write. Rachel moved to relax, her moving to sit down on the couch. Talking to Finn helped her relax, even if it was only her saying the same things as she was saying in her head. At least this way, she'd be able to vent to someone. As soon as Finn brought up a tour, she sighed. "Yeah, probably. And I'll probably have to go to different countries. At least places in Europe. I hate being away from you, but you know I love being on tour. If I end up going somewhere really cool, maybe you can see if you can get off a couple of days to come with me and explore for a little bit." She offered, shrugging gently. "It won't be for a couple of months, if I do. If anything, right now, I'm just going to be stuck in the studio recording all day. But I'll miss you, too. It's going to be so weird to be apart from you. I know we want to have the wedding and stuff, but I mean, at least we'll know soon exactly what I'm doing so we can plan a date and stuff, too. And then we'll have something to look forward to even if we have to be apart for a while."

Finn knew that he was going to try and fix things between Rachel, Taylor and Jeremy. Even if it didn't work he wanted to at least try. Whether they ended up still being a part of her music of not, he knew that she wanted them as friends no matter what she said or how annoyed she was with them at the moment. As Rachel moved to sit down on the couch, Finn moved to sit beside her and he was relieved that she was calming down as she spoke. Of course he understood why she was angry but he knew there was probably another side to the story - Taylor and Jeremy's side - and he wanted to hear that too. "Wow, other countries? That's - that's awesome, babe," he said softly. Finn was so, so proud of her but at the same time it scared him thinking about her being so far away. If she was in Europe and relapsed, he couldn't catch a quick flight or jump in his car and take care of her. God, this tour was going to drive him crazy, that much he knew for sure but he wasn't about to push his fears onto his girlfriend who was so excited about it all. "I'd love to visit you and spend some time with you on your tour. Maybe when you're there you can start thinking about places you'd wanna go on our honeymoon," he said with a small smile on his face. "Hey, don't worry about the wedding stuff, okay? We have plenty of time for all of that. What matters right now is focusing on our careers and getting where we need to be. I'm so proud of you, babe." Finn offered Rachel a smile before he leaned in to press a soft kiss to her lips. There really weren't any words to describe how much he loved her and while he was worried about the drinking and the drugs that were constantly around her career, he knew she was focused on staying sober. Plus, if she needed him, he also knew that he would be right there for her. "It's so crazy to think that you're famous," he said with a laugh. "I forget sometimes that I have to share you with the rest of the world." Finn moved to rest his hand gently on her knee before he squeezed it gently. "I know that things are going to get crazy busy for you with recording and I'm sure you'll have to do a ton of publicity stuff too but just - just remember that if you need to vent or talk about anything I'm right here for you always. I mean, I know you're not crazy like me when it comes to work but I know all of this can be overwhelming, especially without Taylor and Jeremy and I just want to make sure that you're taking care of yourself."

Rachel smiled gently, looking into his eyes as Finn moved to sit next to her. "Yeah. Other countries. I mean, it's obviously insane, but this will probably be it for a while. If things are still good, maybe I'll do something in a year. It's honestly been a while since my last tour but it feels like it was yesterday." Rachel knew that she always went a little crazy when she was on tour and she knew that there were so many temptations that she tried to avoid but it was impossible to. She had been high more times than she'd admit to Finn, but until she had come home, she did a good job of avoiding alcohol. She never went out with Taylor or Jeremy, and if she did, she was the designated driver so she just had a water or a soda. "I'll think about where I want to go. I'd obviously love to go somewhere tropical, but I could even do something like Rome or Mykonos or something. We'll see. We just need to sit down and plan it. We have the budget to do whatever we want, so we just will have to figure it out." She knew that her and Finn did just need to escape somewhere together. They were usually alone at home, but they needed to go away for a bit and just remember what it felt like to simply be together without any problems. As he spoke, Rachel just nodded gently and looked into his eyes. "I love you. I just... I'll talk to you, I promise. You know how I get when I get sucked into my work. I just... I push people out and I don't mean to. And I know you kind of learned not to take it personally, but if I get weird, just try and bring me back down to reality. It's just hard. You get the same way, you know? You just bury yourself in your work and don't look back. But that's probably why we work, you know?" Rachel smiled gently before she went to lean in to kiss him, looking at him as she pulled away. "I promise I'll try and keep in touch with you about everything but I just... I don't know. I don't want to deal with all of this shit all of the time and I'm going to be so far away from you and it's going to be hard. I know things have been better for us and I want to keep it that way. I just want to keep it that way. Or make it better. I just know it's going to be really stressful."

Finn knew that his and Rachel's honeymoon would be amazing. Between the two of them they made really good money and he was more than aware that they could go on the vacation of their dreams. As she spoke about how she got wrapped up into her work, he nodded understandingly. "Hey, you know I understand that for sure," he said softly before they shared a kiss. "Us being apart is always a little stressful but we'll be okay." Finn was definitely scared of the two of them being so far apart but he also knew that this was a part of her career and it was something they would just need to learn to deal with. Her music meant so much to her and to know that she had the opportunity to share that with the world? God, he was so proud of her. "The only thing I ask is that we just talk every day like we did last time you were away, you know? Because that - that really helped me," he said. "I just have a problem relaxing when I don't have you here to remind me." Finn laughed softly for a moment and shook his head before he looked back at his girlfriend. "For someone who's job it is to take care of people, I'm really shitty at taking care of myself, aren't I?" He knew that when he was left on his own that he got extremely wrapped up in his job. When Rachel was away he often spent more time than usual at the hospital and while he still went about his normal routine, he didn't really give his brain a chance to unwind. He figured that was exactly why he had such a bad anxiety attack while Rachel had been away on her last tour. "I can't wait to marry you," he breathed out as he looked at Rachel, a small smile on his face before he leaned in to kiss her. "You're my everything," he said softly as he pulled away. "We should celebrate you signing this new contract," he said, moving to get up from the couch. "Do you want me to make you something really nice for dinner? Or we - we can even go out somewhere if you want. Anything you want to do today, we can do. I know that everything didn't go the way you wanted it to with Taylor and Jeremy but we can still salvage the day so we can celebrate, right?" Finn didn't want to think about tours or him and Rachel being so busy with work that they barely spoke. All he wanted to do was focus on this moment with his girlfriend and he knew that everything would be okay.

Rachel loved being on tour because she loved the experiences and she loved doing what she always wanted to do. But unfortunately, she knew that being apart from Finn was also some of the worst times in her life. She hated being apart from him for too long and honestly, she could remember so many times she had almost flew home from the tour to see him for even just a day. "No, I mean, of course I'm going to call you. It helps me, too. I like calling you before I go to bed and stuff because it helps me relax and I know I need to keep you in line," She said teasingly, looking into his eyes. "But you do need help relaxing. You're not super shitty at taking care of yourself, you just put everyone else before you. And then things start getting bad." She said, smiling sadly. As Finn moved to get up from the couch, she looked over at him, a small smile rising on her lips. Celebrating definitely did sound like a good idea, plus, she really wanted to get her mind off of Taylor and Jeremy. Honestly, a part of her expected for them to come to the apartment and to apologize for acting insane, but she also knew that they really didn't have to apologize. If anything, she was the one who did something wrong and should have apologized. "We can stay in. I really don't want to go out. I don't think they'll say anything to anyone, but I don't want to go out in LA and have paparazzi be all over me. I don't know how people know, but when you sign contracts, people always find out." She said, running a hand through her hair. "We can cook something together. Nothing super fancy, I don't need you slaving over the stove all day. And then we can celebrate for real later. Because when you say celebrate, my mind doesn't go to a nice dinner, but I know you know that. But I am hungry and stressed out and those two things always make food a good option."

Finn knew that Rachel being away on tour again would be tough but he also knew that they could get through it. They could get through anything, that much he knew for sure. When she told him that they could stay in instead of going out, he nodded understandingly. "Yeah, we don't have to go anywhere. I forget that paparazzi are a thing we have to think about now. It's so weird," he said with a laugh. It was always strange when he was out with Rachel and noticed people taking photos of her but it was something that he knew they were just going to have to get used to since it came with the territory of fame. As she spoke, Finn couldn't help but smirk as their eyes met. "I promise that we can celebrate after we eat for as long as you want," he said teasingly. "Plus, I mean, if you're stressed out then that's really going to help out, I think." He couldn't help but laugh softly as he walked into the kitchen, opening up the fridge and trying to figure out what they could have. "We have stuff to make fajitas if you want something like that," he said before he turned his head to look back at her. There was something about just being home with her and things feeling so normal that made his heart swell with love and he knew it was one of the many reasons that he missed her so much when she went away. These simple moments were the ones that he craved, that ones that made him fall in love with her even more than he already was.

Rachel knew that the biggest reason she never was in steady relationships like this was because she thought that she would be horrible at it. And honestly, she wasn't that great, but she was at least trying. She could never imagine herself cooking dinner or cleaning up around the house but with Finn, everything just felt normal. It didn't feel weird to sit with popcorn or chips in front of the TV or make the bed in the morning or clean up after themselves. It just felt like it was meant to be and while marriage was a whole thing on its own, she knew it really wouldn't feel any different than what it did currently. Honestly, she was just looking forward to being with him all of the time and just having the wedding that they both wanted. "Good. Celebrating as long as I want sounds really, really good." She said softly, as she looked at him before starting to follow after him. She moved behind him and wrapped her arms around his waist, hugging him tightly for a moment before pulling away. "That's fine, I don't really care what we eat." Rachel knew that it didn't matter -- she'd enjoy anything and she'd enjoy just being able to get to spend time with him. "I can help. I mean, I know I'm not the greatest cook, but I can follow directions. Whenever I make dinner for us, I literally find a recipe on my phone and I can't look away because I know I'll fuck up," Rachel laughed, her grabbing a couple of plates to put them onto the table for later so they could eat. As she was about to grab a couple of things from the pantry, she stopped when she heard a knock at the door. "Did you invite someone?" She asked as she looked over at Finn. "Can you get it? It's probably just some kid trying to sell pies or cookie dough or something for school and you know that I'm just going to say no and you're at least nice enough to say yes and buy the cheapest shit," She said, a soft laugh escaping her lips. "I mean, it could be my manager or something but they would have called me first so I don't think it's for me."

Finn smiled as Rachel wrapped her arms around his waist and when she pulled away, he turned around to face her. "Hey, I know you can help, Rach, I just like to cook for you. It's fun." As they both started grabbing things they would need to prepare their meal there was a knock at the door and he looked over at his girlfriend with confusion in his gaze. "Um, no, I didn't invite anyone over." He nodded when she asked if he could get the door and laughed softly at her words. "I can't say no if it's kids selling cookies, I feel bad," he told her. "The only other person that would just show up is Savannah but she's at work." When Finn opened the door and saw Taylor and Jeremy standing on the other side, his eyes immediately widened. "Guys, what are you doing here?" he said quickly, trying his best to block them from stepping into the apartment since he knew this conversation wouldn't go well. "I know you guys are pissed off, I can see it just by looking at you both but you need to go home and cool off and we can all sit down and talk about this another day." "No, we're talking about it now. I'm sorry, Finn, we're not pissed at you but we need to talk to your fiance. Move," Jeremy said before him and Taylor pushed past him. Finn sighed and shook his head, closing the door and walking back into the kitchen and over to Rachel. "I can't believe you signed that fucking contract," Taylor said. "Since when did you become a sellout, Rachel? They want you to feature on rappers songs and write shit that is nothing like your sound - nothing like our sound?" Finn moved to stand between the two of them and his girlfriend, hoping desperately that he could just calm the whole situation down. "Guys, look. I know you're all angry and upset right now but this really isn't the time, okay? I think that it would be best if all of you just - just cooled off before talking about any of this. It would just be better if - " "Finn, fuck off, this doesn't have anything to do with you," Taylor said, cutting him off. Finn looked at his friend in surprise and he could feel himself immediately getting uncomfortable. He hated fighting, he hated confrontation and he truly didn't know what to say to anyone to get them to calm down.

Rachel didn't want to deal with any random people at the door and Finn was honestly friendly to just about anyone. Unless it was his dad, he was so polite and respectful and he tried his best to get along with everyone. She figured he had to do it every single day at work with the hundreds of people he saw, so she knew why he was so good at it. Rachel was about to grab something off of the shelf when she heard Finn talking quietly at the door. Before she knew it, she heard footsteps walking further into the apartment, and she immediately felt her anger rise again when she saw Taylor and Jeremy. "A sellout? Fuck you. It's not my fault I'm making a smart move and you're too scared to sign the fucking paper." She said, moving out slightly from behind Finn, moving to the side. When Taylor cut Finn off, she rolled her eyes. "What crawled up your ass? Now you're being an asshole to your own friend, huh?" She said, putting down what was in her hands from the pantry. "Look, you don't-" She started, Jeremy speaking up. "You didn't even try and change their minds. It was always the three of us. And you're just letting them push us to the back like we're your backup dancers or some shit." Rachel knew that was a lie -- she tried to figure stuff out before Taylor and Jeremy had immediately freaked out and started to make a mess of the situation. "It was never about you!" She said loudly, looking at the two of them. "I had bandmates before you. It was Josh and I originally. Then it was me. And then Ifound you. Not the other way around. Just because you're getting less share of the band doesn't mean you'd be getting paid less. You'd be getting paid more. Do you know how much money you'd be making? Brands would fucking pay thousands for you to wear a pair of headphones in a music video. You were stupid to walk out of that meeting. We already were with big names when we sang with Ed. I don't know why you think this is going to be different. You're just being stupid." She saw Taylor about to speak up again, so she continued to speak. "So yeah, I signed the contract. And yeah, maybe I'm being a sellout but it's gonna feel so good when I'm doing all of the shit you could have been doing."

Finn didn't know how to feel about this whole situation. While he was proud of Rachel for finding success and choosing the path that was best for her, he also worried that maybe she did throw Taylor and Jeremy to the side along the way. They had been with her through so much and the fact that they felt useless to her made him upset for all of them. The second that Rachel said it had never been about them, his eyes widened as he looked between all three of them worriedly. "Guys, please stop fighting," he breathed out, knowing that his words were falling on deaf ears. "Wow, the truth comes out, then," Taylor said as he looked at Rachel, shaking his head before he exchanged a look with Jeremy. "So all along we were just on the Rachel train, huh? From the start it's been about you? It's not like the three of us wrote any songs together, right? It was all you. Your words, your voice and just our sound." Finn looked at Taylor and Jeremy sadly. He could tell that they were hurt and while he wanted to figure out a way to fix the whole situation, he really wasn't sure if it was going to be possible. "You know what the best part of being in this band was for me, Rachel?" Jeremy asked her. "It was getting to be with my best friends, getting to play music that we loved and getting to experience all this crazy shit together. But, you know what? If for you it was all about getting ahead then I hope you have a great fucking time when you're at the top and you're all alone." Taylor and Jeremy were both clearly seething and Finn bit down on his lip as he looked between all of them. "Why does this have to end your friendship? Why can't we all just - just sit down and figure something out?" he said softly. Taylor looked at him and offered him a small smile before he looked down and shook his head. "You're so selfish, Rachel," Jeremy said, laughing for a moment. "Who was there for you when you fucked up shit with Finn and Josh, huh? Me and Taylor. We've been there for you through fucking everything and you know it. How many times did I lie for you? How many times did I bring you home from a bar because you were a mess and I didn't want anything bad to happen to you? Then you go ahead and you sign this fucking contract because you're a money hungry bitch." "Don't call her that, Jeremy. Come on, man," Finn said as he looked at his two friends. "If this is the Rachel that you're gonna be then you're gonna lose everything, I hope you know that. You're gonna lose everyone who somehow still gives a fuck."  

Rachel knew that she was really being a bitch, but she had no interest in having this conversation right now. "Shut up, that's not what I'm saying. I'm just saying that your names aren't on the fucking front cover of the album. It's mine. I'm not saying that it's not our sound. But you can't just put your trust in me for five seconds during a fucking meeting so we can talk about a contract, you just jump down my throat. They weren't fucking firing you guys, you should have just sat there and listened to what they had to say. But no, you have to make yourselves look like assholes." She spat, her looking at the both of them. "I'd rather be at the top alone than be with two people who apparently hate me and can't go along with some simple change." She knew that they were really her only friends other than Mia, but she had been without them before. They were just really the only healthy friends she had in a long time. As they continued to speak, she shook her head and looked off to the side before she heard Jeremy call her a bitch. "Get the fuck out." She said, pointing towards the door. "I'm not going to lose everything. And you know what? If this is the last album I ever get to produce, at least I'll fucking make a name for myself. And you know, you could have been there beside me if you would have given it a chance. I hope you enjoy your little time alone, because now you'll never escape me. I'll be everywhere you look. TV. The internet. And if I lose everyone, apparently they never gave a fuck to begin with," She spat, her pushing past Finn and past Taylor and Jeremy, hitting their arm with hers roughly as she walked towards the door. "What the fuck happened to you? These few months back from the tour really made you this much of a bitch?" "Did you not hear me before?" She said as she looked at them, opening the door and looking at them harshly. "Get out." She said again. "You should have never come here. If you ever want to talk to me again, don't bother. I won't answer and I sure as hell won't let you in this apartment again."

Finn could feel everything spinning out of control the more Taylor and Jeremy spoke and it scared him to think that they didn't want to be friends with Rachel anymore. The only other close friend she had other than them was Mia and while he liked Mia, she was a little crazy and he didn't like the idea of her not having Taylor and Jeremy as her support system the way she usually did. Especially while being away on a tour. When she pushed past all three of them, Finn looked at his girlfriend worriedly. "You think we'd want to talk to you again after this?" Jeremy said with a laugh as he looked over at her. "Now that I really know who you are, I can promise you that I'll never speak to you again. You know the funny thing about you, Rachel? You have this huge ego and think you're hot shit but the only reason anyone decent has ever stuck around in your life is because of him," Jeremy said, pointing and Finn and immediately making him feel even more uncomfortable. "So you can fuck yourself and when I see you on TV or wherever else you show up, I'll be happy knowing you're miserable inside." Jeremy glared at her before he stormed out of the apartment and Taylor hesitated for a moment before heading towards the door as well. "See you Friday for PUBG, Finn," he said awkwardly before he followed after Jeremy. Finn stood there silently for a moment, biting down on his lip as he looked down at the floor before he brought his gaze back up to his girlfriend. He didn't know what to say. He didn't know how to fix this and he hated that the three of them were fighting so badly. "Wow," he breathed out before he ran a hand through his hair. "I um - are you alright, baby?" he asked her softly. He knew he would try to fix this as he saw Taylor and Jeremy separate from Rachel but he could tell the three of them actually being in a room together would just end in disaster until they all managed to calm down.

Rachel rolled her eyes as Jeremy spoke, her looking off to the side as they started walking towards the door. She tried not to comment on his words, knowing that if she kept talking, they'd just have another argument or continue the same one, and she wasn't going to deal with it right now. She didn't want to even talk to them for at least a few days, and she hated that they even came here to talk knowing that it would just escalate immediately. "Fuck you, Jeremy. I don't see you running around with a group of friends following you, either. So stop acting like you're hot shit, too. You always think you're so amazing because you don't have baggage and shit but it doesn't make you perfect, so stop acting like it." She said, waiting for them both to head out of the door before she slammed it behind them, her locking it and staying facing it for a few moments before she turned towards Finn when she heard him speak. "Yeah, I'm fine." She said, ignoring the seriousness of his tone. "I'm not really hungry anymore." She said, grabbing something off of the counter and putting it back where she had gotten it from. Rachel wasn't interested in talking about anything, and she knew she was making it clear, but of course, Finn always thought it was necessary to talk about everything but he was usually good about having her wait to talk about it. She never used to talk about anything, and this was something that she definitely didn't want to talk about. "If you still want to cook, I don't care, I'll eat cereal for all I fucking care," She said, looking over at him as she leaned against the counter before looking off to the side, trying to block all of the thoughts out of her head.

Finn winced when Rachel slammed the door and when she said that she wasn't hungry anymore, he simply nodded. "That's okay, baby," he said softly. Finn started putting some things he had gotten out of the fridge away and when she told him that she would eat cereal for all she cared, he nodded. He could practically feel the rage radiating off of her and he knew that now was not the time for them to sit down and talk about this no matter how much he wanted to. "It's still early, we don't have to eat yet," he said as he looked over at her, a sad smile on his face. Finn walked over to Rachel and slipped his arms around her waist, his hands resting on her hips before he leaned down and pressed a kiss to her cheek. He knew that there was nothing he could say to fix this situation and while he most certainly was going to try, today just wasn't the day for that. "I know you don't want to talk," he said softly as he kept his hands on her hips, his fingers dipping beneath the hem of her shirt as he caressed her skin with his fingertips. "And I know if we try and do anything right now it'll be hard to just act like everything's okay." Finn bit down on his lip as he looked into her eyes, him stepping a bit closer to her and offering her a small smile. "But I can think of one thing that we can do that will distract you. And, I mean, I know you, Rachel Berry. I know how to get your mind off of things." Finn knew that sex wasn't the right answer to everything. He knew that it solved nothing. However, he figured there wasn't really anything they even could solve at this point. All they could do was make the most of the shitty situation that they were in right now and if that meant just focusing on each other then he figured it was the best way to go.

Rachel kept her gaze away from Finn as he spoke and moved closer to her, just nodding gently as he said that they didn't need to eat yet. The moment that his arms were around her waist, she felt herself relax slightly, only turning her head to look towards him as his fingers moved beneath her shirt. She really wasn't interested in talking at all, and she knew that there would be a time and a place to really talk about everything and figure it out. There were things wrong on both sides, but she was trying to just figure it out and move forward. Rachel bit down on her bottom lip as he continued to speak, knowing that his mind was exactly where hers was. She wanted him -- she always did -- and this was a good a way as ever to get rid of all of the stress and the anger she was feeling. "You do know how to get my mind off of things. You're pretty good at that." She murmured, her moving her hand to his cheek before she moved it to the hair at the nape of his neck, using her hand to guide him down to kiss her, her lips meeting his and kissing him slowly at first before she deepened the kiss, her pulling away for a moment to look at him. Rachel was a firm believer in sex solving everything. She could remember multiple times that she was fuming and just being able to be with Finn made everything ten times better. "I'm really glad you know me so well otherwise this wouldn't be nearly as good," She murmured softly, her hands moving down to his belt, undoing it before her fingers started to work on the button of his jeans.

Finn smiled when Rachel told him that he knew how to get her mind off of things. While he knew sex didn't fix anything, it was definitely a good distraction and he knew his girlfriend well enough to know that this was the only way to get her to cool off from her fight with Taylor and Jeremy. When she guided him down to kiss her, he smiled into the kiss before he responded eagerly, licking his lips when she pulled away. "I've known you since we were seventeen, baby. I better know by now," he said with a laugh. She quickly undid his belt before she started working on the button of his jeans and Finn smirked for a moment before he lifted her shirt over her head. He dipped his head down to press his lips back to hers as his hand slipped up along the smooth skin of her back, unclasping her bra quickly and tugging it off of her. "God, I love you, Rach," he breathed out between kisses. Already he could feel the angry tension that had been in the room beginning to be replaced by the sexual tension between them and he was relieved that he knew just how to get her mind off of everything. He quickly unbuttoned her pants and shoved them downwards, knowing that he just wanted his girlfriend naked as soon as possible at this point. Finn lifted Rachel up onto the counter so he didn't have to lean down so much before he began trailing kisses down along the curve of her neck, biting and sucking teasingly at her skin as he did so.

Rachel grinned slightly at Finn's words. "That's true. We've had a lot of time to perfect a lot of stuff," She said softly, looking up into his eyes. She knew that they had really been through so much and she knew that they weren't exactly finished going through things. Not even close. Tours were always hard for the both of them, but they made it through the last one without any major problems. They missed each other and Finn definitely had a few struggles and so did she, but she knew that they'd just have to work through it. She knew that having a ring or not having a ring didn't matter -- their bond was strong no matter what, but she knew that things were going to be better. As Finn lifted her onto the counter, a soft laugh escaped her lips, her smiling gently before she bit down onto her bottom lip when she felt his lips start to trail along her neck. "Mm. I've been waiting for this all day. Celebrating only sounds fun when sex is involved." She said, laughing gently before she moved to kiss him again, her arms wrapping around him before she pulled his shirt over his head, attempting to get closer to him. She wrapped one of her legs slightly around him, her trying to tug him closer. She kissed him again before pulling away, laughing softly. "You know, I think when I first started dating you, I thought that we'd have boring ass sex but I'm so glad I was wrong. Because it's really fucking hot," She laughed, her hand running along his arm as she looked at him. "I love you. And I love our totally not boring sex."

Finn smiled into the crook of Rachel's neck when she told him that she had been waiting for this all day. While he wasn't exactly happy about the fact that she had hurt Taylor and Jeremy, he was her fiance and he wanted to support her as best as he could. If that meant just standing by her side to support and celebrate with her, then that was what he was going to do. He loved her and if she felt leaving Taylor and Jeremy was the right choice then he wasn't going to fight her on that. "Isn't the whole point of celebrating the sex that comes along with it?" he asked her playfully before they kissed eagerly. They only separated briefly as she tugged his shirt up and over his head before they kissed once more and Finn moved his hands to her thighs as she guided him in closer to her. "I thought I was going to be terrible too, believe me," he said teasingly. "But, I mean, I learned how to have sex from you, you know. There's no way in hell in could be boring." Finn bit down on his lip as he looked into her eyes and he knew that he was so in love with her. The tension that was between them never failed to amaze him and he knew that he just wanted to make her feel good. "I love you too. And I love our not boring sex too. I don't think you'd ever let that happen." Finn laughed softly before he pressed his lips back to hers, kissing her eagerly before he brought his hands to the fabric of her underwear and quickly pulled it down her legs. He quickly moved his hand to her opening and smirked into their kiss as he felt her wetness on his touch. "You know what's really fucking hot?" he breathed out. "How wet you always get for me," he told her, his eyes dark with lust as he looked into hers. Finn rested his forehead against hers for a moment as he slipped two fingers into her, knowing that he enjoying teasing her and making her feel good in every way. "We're definitely not boring," he whispered, his eyes boring into hers as he fingered her, wanting to get her as worked up as he could.

Rachel let a soft laugh escape her lips as he spoke, knowing that she loved him more than she could honestly admit. She didn't want to leave him and she knew that she'd be totally overwhelmed with work for a little bit, but she knew that it was something that she couldn't exactly help. She had to get in the studio and get recording whatever she could, especially if they were trying to force out an album incredibly quickly. She didn't want to hide away in some dark studio, but it was also something that she loved to do. She loved singing and loved performing, and she couldn't complain if she was following her dream. "You did learn from me. I mean, we had a lot of practice when we were going out back in high school. I'm pretty sure that I was always trying to get in bed with you, especially because we weren't having sex for a while. But... believe me. I'm so glad we are the way we are now." She said, leaning forward to meet him for a kiss. "You're right though, I would never let us get boring. We're gonna be old as fuck and still be having hot ass sex," She smirked gently, looking at him before lifting her hips slightly so he could pull her underwear off. "Fuck," She breathed out softly as he spoke, her moving to keep one arm wrapped around him slightly while the other one rested on the counter to hold herself in place. "Mm." She moaned softly, biting down on her bottom lip. "You know I'm always gonna be this wet for you. I always want you, baby." She murmured, her hand that was still wrapped around him moving to the fabric of his boxers. "Are you gonna fuck me on this counter, too?" She murmured, looking into his eyes for a moment before she let her eyes shut, her leaning forward to kiss him.

Finn knew that in high school Rachel had definitely taught him a lot about sex. With her he had learned to feel confident in himself and he had memorized every inch of her body, more than determined to make her feel good. "I like the sound of that," he said with a laugh when she told him they were going to be old and still having hot sex. He was pretty sure with her it was impossible not to. Finn looked at Rachel with lust in his eyes when she moaned softly, knowing that watching the effects he had over her was the biggest turn on in the world for him. "I know you do, baby. Just like I always want you," he breathed out, biting down on his lip when she moved her hand to the fabric of his boxers. God, he wanted her. When she asked him if he was going to fuck her, he groaned softly before they shared a heated kiss. "Mm, I'm gonna fuck you so good, baby. I wanna make you cum," he breathed out between kisses. Finn gently pulled his fingers out of her before he shoved his boxers down his legs, knowing that he just wanted to be inside of her already. He pulled out of the kiss for a moment as he lined himself up at her opening, his tip teasing her gently before he pushed into her. "Fuck," he breathed out, knowing that the sensation of being inside of her was one that would never get old. Finn hooked his hands under her knees to tug her even closer to him as he started to thrust into her hard and fast before he crashed his lips back to hers. Being with Rachel like this was the best feeling in the world and he knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life making her feel good.

Rachel bit down on her bottom lip as he moved away from her slightly to push his boxers down his legs, her moving slightly on the counter in anticipation. She really did want him and she wanted more than anything to just get rid of all of the anger that was still built up inside of her from everything that had happened. She knew that she was in the wrong about a lot that was going on, but things had been blown way out of proportion and she knew that things weren't going to get fixed overnight. Things needed to get fixed, but she wasn't going to be the one to make the change. As soon as he moved her a bit closer to him, she let out a soft moan. Being with Finn the way she was always made her so incredibly happy. Their relationship was amazing and she was obsessed with the fact that they were able to do anything they wanted and it wasn't weird. They hadn't changed since they had been young and she loved that things were still so amazing and exciting. "Mm, you feel so fucking good." She breathed out before she moved her lips back to his, her hands moving to his cheeks as she went to kiss him again, moving her lips against his passionately. She was so happy that she was going to be able to be with him like this for the rest of their lives. All she wanted was him and she wanted more than anything to experience everything their relationship could offer.

Finn groaned softly as he thrust into Rachel, pleasure already coursing through his veins with each movement that he made. Everything between them always felt so good and he knew that while they had their ups and downs that they would always have this intense connection that they could only have with one another. It had been that way ever since they were in high school and he knew it would be that way for the rest of their lives. "Fuck, I love you, baby," he breathed out when she told him that he felt good. The two of them kissed eagerly as he continued to thrust into her and Finn moved one hand to rest on her thigh while the other slipped between them. He immediately started rubbing her clit to give her even more pleasure and he knew that he would never get tired of touching her and making her feel good. "Fuck," he groaned softly between kisses, his hand gripping onto her thigh a bit more before he increased the speed of his thrusts into her. "Are you gonna cum for me, Rach?" he breathed out, pulling out of their kiss for a moment and looking into her eyes. A smile pulled up at the corner of his lips before he started trailing kisses along her neck once more. He could feel the intensity growing between them with each passing moment and he increased the speed of his hand on her clit, wanting to drive her even closer to the edge.

Rachel bit down on her bottom lip for a moment before she felt Finn's lips against hers. She wanted more than anything to forget about everything that had happened throughout the day and concentrate on Finn and even if it seemed impossible previously, it was somehow working. She just wanted to worry about Finn because it was honestly the only person that she had right now who wasn't pissed at her. Other than Mia, but that was someone completely out of the picture of all of this drama. "I love you too." She breathed out, her moaning softly as he moved his hand between them. It was really honestly crazy how far they had come from just messing around in her bedroom at random hours of the day to actually being like this. As Finn pulled away from their kiss, she moaned softly, her letting her head fall back slightly as he started pressing kisses down her neck. "Fuck, I'm gonna cum." She breathed out. Rachel's hand that wasn't holding herself against the counter moved to run along his back slightly, her fingers trailing along his skin. After a few moments, she could feel herself building towards her orgasm and as she came, she let out a moan of Finn's name. She figured the only reason why she'd forget about anything else is because all she could do was concentrate on Finn, and that was her favorite thing to do on a daily basis anyway. "Fuck," She breathed as she started to calm down slightly, her letting out a deep breath.

Finn knew that he was driving Rachel crazy in the best way and he was happy to be able to help distract her a little bit. While he didn't completely agree with her decisions regarding Taylor and Jeremy, it didn't change the fact that he wanted to make his fiance happy. "Fuck," he breathed out when Rachel told him that she was going to cum, knowing that he wasn't going to last much longer either. When he felt her muscles clench around him as she went over the edge, Finn immediately came into her hard, a groan escaping his lips as pleasure surged through his body. Only when they both reached the end of their highs did he stop his thrusts and he bit down on his lip as he looked into her eyes. A small smirk pulled up at the corner of his lips as their gazes met and he moved one hand to rest on her thigh while the other moved up to brush a strand of her hair behind her ear. "I really fucking love you," he told her before he pressed his lips to hers, kissing her slowly and passionately before he pulled away. Finn leaned his forehead against hers and a soft laugh escaped his lips as he looked into her eyes. "I love celebrating with you, baby," he whispered. His fingers brushed gently against the smooth skin of her thigh and he knew that if he could, he would stay with her like this forever. Rachel was his everything and it made him so happy to know that he could make her feel so good. It made him so happy to know that everything between them was finally okay.

#sound the alarm

[projectsblogg]

Justis Pitt-Goodson: The BrownMill Man

I walked into a cafe, after missing two busses and  therefore resorting to a bellowing haul down Halsey Street in Newark, to meet a calm soul sitting on the edge of a chair with his head positioned so that his eyes could catch a glimpse of the sun that sat on the concrete just outside the building we’d met in for the first time. This was Justis Pitt-Goodson. The creator of the brand we know today as BrownMill. I’d only known him from instagram because somehow, even though we’d went to the same school — Rutgers University Newark — we’d always seemed to have missed each other. A reality that is in no way unfamiliar to those attending larger universities. But what was strange to me, was though he’d accomplished so much in the creation of his brand at only 20 years of age and as successful as BrownMill has become, the eyes that sat just behind his eyelids possessed a humility. And so we spoke.

Let’s just start off with your name and what you do.

My name is Justis Pitt-Goodson and I’m a Tailor, Fashion Designer, Entrepreneur, and Leader and I make clothes. I Engineer garments.

Why did you choose Design?

I’ve always been a hustler— you know always trying to sell stuff to make money.Throughout middle school and highschool, I would sell sneakers, cut hair, sold candy all the above. But you know, one thing I really like to do is get dressed and look nice and present myself in a nice fashion. So I figured, “Why not teach myself how to do it?” That’s what I did and I just ran with it. I am a big advocate for Salam— a black owned business — and I’d always ask myself, “All these clothes I buy, where is this money going?” And of course, I soon realized, “Not my people.” And in that, I wanted to build a platform, to put my people on— to put my friends on. And so that’s something I’ve been doing since then.

You post often your community service escapades, why is it important to give back to your community?

Well I feel like, personally, nobody ever really did it for me. So like, going through my trials and tribulations. Seeing like, “Damn I wish I had this, I wish I had that,” or “I wish someone would’ve told me this earlier, and also being an older brother, that kind of helps — seeing my lil’ brother not go through shit that I went through, is because I was there to say “This is what you don’t do and this is what you do.” So It’s like, “What if we can do this on a mass scale, what if we can scale that to our whole community? What is we were leaders and could tell the youngins’ “this is what you don’t do and this is what you do.” and just be an example for them and lead by example. I guess my passion for Community Service comes from not having that in my life.

So that’s why you identify so much with being a leader. Hmmm. Would you say creating BrownMill was a form of leadership?

Yeah. That’s one hundred present. If we don’t make clothes, even if we never sell another jacket, as long as we’re presenting ourselves in a manner that we should, we’re doing the best that we can do.

In terms of the stigma surrounding African Americans, how do you feel about us representing ourselves in the best way possible?

You know, that’s a tricky question because I don’t wanna be like, “Everyone should pull their pants up and be that guy.” I mean, when I create clothes, I think of the “BrownMill Man”, so that’s all I can do. I can’t think about everyone in the world— I think about the “BrownMill Man” and who I’d like that to be and what I think he should stand for.

What should the “BrownMill Man” stand for?

Yah know, I think he should be a righteous individual, I  think he should be someone who’s conversation should always be one of improvement. Someone the little guy on the street can look up to. The “BrownMill Man” should be someone that’s attractive — Mentally and Physically, a Full and Healthy being. And that’s who I design for. That's… The “BrownMill Man”. I can’t say the “BrownMill Man” doesn’t hang on the block, because yeah he could hand out oon the block. But if he’s hanging out on the block, he’s always doing good shit for the community. Talking about good shit. So what would the “BrownMill Man” wear? That’s my process.

So would you say you create clothing for the sake of Occasion? Would you say you create uniforms for what is considered to be the “BrownMilll Man?”

Yeah, you know, my mentor — Luigi Theodore of the Brooklyn Circus — once said to me that “It’s very important that we have uniforms when we come to the office.” I always understood that because, we all went to the March on Washington in December as a collective, and when you saw all the Muslim sisters there, you knew you couldn’t just approach them the same way you’d approach shorty on the street. You couldn’t go up to them and be like “Ayo Ma! …” Because she’s wearing her hijab, and why is that? Why did I feel I couldn’t approach her any way I wanted to, that’s because by the way she was dressed it represents something, it spoke to what she stood for and the way she presented herself mattered. And I thought of ways of how can we put that into the context of what we do as far as BrownMill and the Brooklyn Circus? Making sure we constantly use that same philosophy? Because it really does matter; presentation of self.

I feel like we sort of know and understand that better than anyone, because as a black man, there’s always this stigma surrounding us. A large part of the world sees us as delinquents as soon as they see our brown skin, they see us as a physical threat. Nonetheless, to piggyback off of what you said, presentation does matter, but in what sense do you think presentation doesn’t matter? In what sense do you think substance matters most?

See that’s the thing, I noticed you stated that people think black people are delinquent and all the above, But at the same time, I always end up asking myself, “Why does it matter what they think?” It really only matters what my community thinks, right? So in a sense, presentation does matter, but it doesn’t. Creating a balance is important. But overall, I think it’s important that we create something that stands for something and that is greater.

How would you explain the Utility Collection?

So the Utility collection is something we did last year, around August. And I thought of the notion behind “functionality.” Making sure that pieces aren’t just fashionable, but ensuring that they’re also functional. I started studying janitorial positions and people in the work industry and at the time I was working at a mechanic shop under a guy named Joe and seeing him go day to day with the things that he wore — clothing that possessed pockets, elastic embedded material for flexibility and comfort — I thought, “Let’s devote a collection to just that essence, those patterns, those color schemes,” so in one word — Functionality.

What are BrownMill’s origins?

My grandfather’s last name is “Brown” and my grandmother’s first name was “Mildred,” so I went off of what they stand for. My grandfather moved from North Carolina with three kids to the hood. He worked two full time jobs just to get them out of there. So with that and my grandmother’s creative abilities, I thought it was important to embody what the stood for in their lives, and family is something I really hold number one.

Your latest collection you have coming out — The Virago Collection — you mentioned in a post on the BrownMill instagram page, that especially in Western Culture women aren’t really valued and in that it’s hard to find words in the english language that represent or embody the powerful women. With your grandmother having such a strong influence on you, what is your definition of a “Powerful Woman?”

Well, giving context, I was raised by women. My grandfather had a stroke and was bed ridden when I was in the fourth grade, so most of my life I was raised by my mom, my grandmother, my aunt. So that female image, that model has always been there — it will always be there. And I won’t stray away from. The only thing I know about leadership comes from a woman. So it’s hard to describe.

Considering that those words are so hard to find, and language and communication is everything in society, you wanted to create a collection that stood for what it meant to be a heroine rather than creating a word. The collection is the word. Did you want to create a collection that honored everything you know about leadership and how that stemmed from the posture of a woman?

Haha! — See i’m trying not to give you too much on the collection before it actually comes out! But the collection is so dope man. All the models will be female. Being a menswear brand I wanted to express our ability to be flexible, so although it won’t be women’s clothing, It’s be woman displaying the clothing in a unique way. One of the quotes that inspired this collection is the words of Kanye when he said “I could stand there in a speedo and be looked at like a fucking hero.” We want to have the barest and minimal approach to this collection and at the same time no matter what, the looks that these women give are very heroic. I want people to see right off the back “Damn, thats a leader.” You know? So i’m really excited for this. Hopefully it changes some lives, some perspectives.

I’ve noticed that most of your clothing has this recycled element to it, can you explain that a bit?

So yeah, that’s another thing we explored. Its an ongoing project called “Thread by Thread.” So around the world, tons and tons of clothes are wasted every year. So knowing that, and knowing the garment industry. So that project is dedicated to making clothing sustainable. We use one hundred percent recycled fabrics. Hopefully going forward, that’s something we do with every piece of clothing. We hope to be a clean sustainable brand.

Socially, what would you say you’re attempting to do with BrownMill?

Overall I want it to have a very communal feel — a very grass roots feel. In terms of stores, I want to only have about three stores around the world. I want that tailored element to always be there. I feel there are many brands that produce too much, which depletes the value of an item. So being able to walk into a store and say “only ten people have this and I’m one of them…” thats awesome. And on top of that, if the quality is A1. That’s something I want to maintain throughout. I’d like to give people an opportunity to display and exercise their creative abilities through my platform. A lot of people I’ve worked with in highschool and college who are on my team and are doing the same things. I wanna give people the opportunity to be the best that they can be at all times. I wanna urge people who have talent to exercise it. I want to do the best that I can do in order to help urge people on my team to do what they were born to do. People who aren’t in the brand. I want to inspire them to go after their dreams. That traditional “Follow Your Dreams” speech.

I sense there’s a connection between your urge to create and recreate, and your desire to change society’s perception of certain groups of people. Is that accurate?

Yeah I think so. I don’t think my motive is to change the world. But I do what I think is right. I consider myself a God seeking man, and I compare myself and what we do, to the prophets in the holy books. In these books, thee talk about Jesus, Moses and Mohammed. These were excellent men and we’ll never attain what they attained. But it tells us to seek that, and try and then try again. As long as we try to be the best that we can be and to be like them, we’ll always be doing better than who we were yesterday. Its the same concept at BrownMill. If i’m doing the best that I can do as a leader— as if I was called as Mohammed, Jesus or whoever. So yeah.

What is the connection between BrownMill and sports? Does sports play a role in your brand?

I guess not directly, but indirectly. My background is in sports — basketball, football — but other than that I just love black heritage. I love melanated peoples heritage. That’s something I’d really like to promote. Anything I find interesting. Anything I find unique. Just sort of using that as a reference for what I do.

Who would you say were some of your inspirations? Who would you say inspired you the most?

Well, the Brooklyn Circus, who I interned for a while back. Ralph Lauren definitely. Oswald Burton. Supreme. Bape. A lot of different brands.

Lastly, what would you say to someone who wants to pursue a career in design?

I would say DO IT! I mean, be as timeless as possible. Because with Brown Mill, I think that’s what people like most about us. We make sure everything we make has that element. Because I think the worst thing you can do is create a trendy piece. That’s something I sort of what to move away from. I think with the sustainability factor, I think that’s something that can be kind of cool because these are pieces we can pass down from generation to generation. Make sure that whatever you do is done with great execution. And make sure that whatever you do isn’t done for the now. But taking in what you’ve done in the past, and present to create something that can be worn forever. There’s so much garbage out here in the industry. Don’t create garbage. If you’re going to create something, take your time. So it well. Do it hard. Use reference. Do it from your heart because uniqueness is something no one can ever take from you. The worst thing you can do is try and be like someone else. Each and everyone one of us is uniquely created and different. So drawing in and tapping in on that uniqueness, no one can mimic that. That’s something i’m working on every day — finding out who I am. What’s unique about me. The self analysis the self reflection i’m using to put into what I do.

#icono

[rennyji]

so despite me saying to "act natural" hundreds of times over these 11+years and recently, people prefer to take the effort, and waste the energy, to do what the orchestrators say, and act in a manner that suits the "project/program/situation."-

-acting natural requires nothing from U. Just be U; don't hide that this "situation" for 11+ years occurred; and go by what comes to mind when U see me, or by a direct conversation/interaction. Simple. You can stop wasting your time on this pointless endeavor to pervert my life.-

-if that's too hard, go F*k urself. 11+ years of saying it? - I think is enough.

moving on...normal tweets...-

Bronxville Pondfield Road has several stores on both sides of the street. From outside, nice looking buildings, and you suspect the insides are about quality stuff. But the parking situation is ridiculous. To shop and spend money, U have to spend money on parking at the meters-

- &theres only like 20 meter parking spaces 4all these stores. Shouldn't the landlords or whoever contemplate the business that these stores are losing from lack of parking? -

-U drive all the way there, find out no parking...what do U do? Drive in circles until some1 vacates their meter parking space? What a waste of time...someone should do something for such a busy area...

Try drinks from Rebbl...they can be coffee substitutes...you can get them at ShopRite, but Wegmans has more variety in that brand...They're pretty expensive, but I hope if more people buy them or see their value, eventually the price will go down... https://rebbl.co/

I miss the days when Starbucks had an online store. Could have fresh coffee beans delivered to your residence...now you gotta go all the way to the store...-wait...did i tweet that already? if so, sorry for the repeat...

If you have an Alexa device, search the “Echo Wall Clock” on Amazon. It sets itself, especially when daylight savings time.

Have a “Hey Google” device? Try the “Philips Hue” smart bulb and multicolor smart bulb. The multicolor one provides different colors to the room on a “Hey Google” command. Search Amazon...

Im not sure if the orchestrators areTrying 2get me 2buy stuff or not, buts its like, from boxers to undershirts to socks to fleeces to shirts-theyve all goneMissing. I mean I know I had a ton of theseThings, when they all randomlyDisappear from ur laundry, U justThink, now what?!

so heard about the Blum Center and gave advice on healthier living...while their products are expensive, you learn about the benefits of all sort of stuff, even simple things like chia seeds and fiber and how they can keep you full and aid with morning bathroom rituals...- - from talk in previous tweet, this is the Blum Center's link: https://blumcenterforhealth.com/

John Douillard and his LifeSpa in Colorado (offering Skype meetings) can also aid with better lifestyles and healthier living. It's rooted in Ayurveda and Yoga and Meditation. Check out their site: https://lifespa.com/

Nothing like 90s music on Spotify...with the exception of their 2010s playlist for hits, Spotify is an indicator to me that music has gone downhill...

There’s something very attractive to me about a bottle of coke vs. the can... it’s just...aesthetically pleasing and tasty...

so there's like 10-20 normal tweets below. twitter has the most recent tweet on top. scroll down for the starting tweet with today's date... My twitter handle is @RennyJi or you can not follow me on twitter and still read with the web link: twitter dot com slash rennyji

in addition to the morning normal tweets, a thought-

So from my old complaints to the police elaborating on the science of a situation, it turns out I left out something that became transparent to me recently: This concept of filters people see through or the figurative lenses on the glasses they wear. -

-Years ago, I think there was something about me being a sweetheart and in need of friends( by a girl and her friends, a school, who cares, at this point)...ok...ummm..reality being, i see the concept of friends and relationships just like the next person: through fate, destiny,-

-or something as simple as bumping into someone repeatedly at a coffeeshop, you meet people.(Not by “the situation” discussing your whereabouts and timing. What I said is how things naturally happen and the “back to before all this/back to normal” idea that I’m after, along with not hiding anything) To see me, through the lens that I’m on some kind of endeavor to be an American icon, make everyone my -

-friend- well, that doesn’t match my goals, interests or personalities. In all that I do being relayed (probably, I dunno), maybe from my Twitter, you heard from me about how I kept a girl in my prayers; -

-maybe you heard since my childhood best friend/girl friend moved away, I’ve been on a lifelong quest for a replacement; maybe from the orchestrators you heard I can be loving to my sibling...-

-from the orchestrators, you see me as a, I guess, f* me, a sensitive caring male. From my stories, maybe you know my values. -

-But bear in mind, these are aspects or sides to a multifaceted personality, just like everyone else. Who I share the above sides or personas with, are my loved ones (family/friends). -

-So this raises the problem of who is my audience, when I or someone on my behalf, says things. I keep saying talk to me directly, because how I may be with you individually, may be different from a painting of my identity, for better or worse.-

-So two things thus far...what lens/ filter are you seeing me through? Next question, are you the intended audience? And all of this boils down to reputation. The concept of a person’s status in society, their reputation globally is something people work very hard for. -

-It is my intention to sue the orchestrators for soiling my reputation. Understanding this, they are of the belief, by relaying my life, a reputation will follow. But then the concept of audiences, filters, all rise again. -

-You*re making my reputation as America’s son/friend.-Not interested, beyond the Golden Rule. I renounce being an American, after what your people did, and I uphold my Indian heritage.  11 years of my life...hmmm...yeah I feel like the orchestrators are prostituting my life. -

-Im in a crazy situation. A 90 year old b*tch & her possibly lesbian passenger give me the OK to take a parking space. I go out to take it. She then stops me w/her car randomly, while the tool of a couple behind me shake their hands 4 me, to ignore the parking, and drive ahead.-

-I had my signal on, I was moving toward the space before all this happened ...you know, be it because of a “situation” or the filter this white woman sees “herself “through, she is not my boss, and her attitude on the road would only succumb to my attitude. -

-What does she think of herself? That disgusting nasty face she made. Does she see herself as superior? The nerve. All after she tells me to take the space, and then decides to take it herself. -

-The orchestrators tell family, friends, strangers to give me something to read into...it’s mind exploding because you expect me to take the bait and keep writing...I’ve praised women in my speech and in my writing, over their beauty and value in a mans life. -

-Like today, at a stop sign, driving home or taking a short cut elsewhere, saw a gorgeous tan blonde smiling. Seeing someone like her, for herself, can brighten any mans day, like a day of sunlight. But it should naturally happen.

-But that said, I’ve shown a value, a side. For some, it’s an opportunity to overestimate ur self worth. I am not desperate, despite throwing myself across the table. -

In this world, without sacrificing my dignity, from one extreme to another, I can arrange a marriage, or if it was about getting laid, pay someone. I aim to do things the right way. But then I see the 90 year old and idiot middle aged American women on the side of them -

-road involving themselves in this aforementioned parking attempt. Your rosy lives are ur rosy lives. I live in reality unlike whatever cloud You live on, while being a victim of abuse by the American orchestrators. So, Keep a check on ur attitudes in response in reading this.-

-Years ago, and now, I’ll say it again to my surroundings, I am a practitioner of the Golden Rule. I respect those who respect me. Some of you, in your world of games, please go waste someone else’s time. An American icon? A paragraph ago, -

- I explained how I see friends, because of randomness being flung on me like sh*t out of a toilet, for the purpose of constantly explaining things. -

-I make myself available, when and where, to anyone who’s anyone. The orchestrators want to dictate who can glance at me or make me approachable. Childish nonsense. Not out to make myself any more approachable than I am.

- Now I need some kind hearted person to talk to me and tell me what's going on. That Im not out of my mind. If ur waiting for this cr*p to be over, none of you will ever see me. I mean, I'm after peace of mind, and when I needed you, in the way that I did, you were never there.

-The orchestrators may tell you to so called "support me" by doing this/that...but that is not from me, may not even match the plan of the day. I honestly cannot make out what they're saying. -

If I'm right about stuff, its through coincidence or me figuring things out on my own. From any of you, the community, All I'm asking is for you to be a true American at heart and do the hard thing of telling me what's going on.-

-Thats the only thing I ever needed. Ud be a lifelong friend&hero. After this, w/my lawsuitMoney, Ill be on some privateEstate, far away, from these past ridiculous places of America. All I wanted 4 all these yrs  is peace of mind & the Mutual Respect that the orchestrators took.-

-But going back to what I was saying, at the end of the day, beyond family and loved ones, I am not your friend or your enemy, or even paying attention to the cr*p left for me to read into. That stuff is between you and the orchestrators you blindly and ridiculously follow.-

-If you are not talking to me directly, then you are not helping me. Playing with your phone won’t make you a saint-for the orchestrators, in the past, I called this the American idol mentality. You think by voting for someone to win, you’re altruistic.-

-Save your energy, direct it towards someone who will appreciate it, or do something constructive. I’ve given my spheel about “being natural without hiding anything.” That’s the only help I seek. End of the day, you be you, I’ll be me. -

-At the beginning of this &now, Ive made it clear, not out of anger, spite, or because Im fresh out of some troubling incident: mind your own business. I don’t want you in my life, and to be honest, I don’t want to be in your heads either beyond the practice of the Golden Rule.-

-Get at me (Slang), or kindly get lost (Literal).-

-These sounds tell me they’re going to “do away” with me. The extent, depth, seriousness of that I dunno. (But if I’m to meet my end, I want the Americans to know this much from me, amidst the clouds you live on. -

-At the end of this, you all and the kid sounding faction of the orchestrators are in for a surprise. Really walked into it, as  you'll figure out, soon enough.)-

-Ur faces or reactions or gestures do not match up to my writings, what I’m being told, etc.(this part goes to everyone, but especially my parents- I feel these people (orchestrators) are lying to you regarding their intentions and what they direct at me.)

-From past complaints being relevant in the present day or not, not gonna elaborate on past things after this. Way too much time for something I’m not willingly taking part in or interested in. Take care.

ending it for today with a few normal tweets -

Coffee machines with adjustable strength settings...expensive, but worth it!

getting a starbucks card, or memberships with doordash or massage places can be rewarding...

a person can say/do 10,000 good things, and being human, do 1 bad thing...but through human nature, other people will only remember/consider the bad thing without thinking things through...

[dawnajaynes32]

Mike Wasilewski on Purpose, Clarity, and Making Cool Things

Mike Wasilewski, Co-Founder and COO of Frank Collective, is in the business of branding and making cool things. His thoughts on design trends, inspirations, and projects are covered here.

Name: Mike Wasilewski, Co-Founder & CCO of Frank Collective Location: Brooklyn, NY Design school attended: The College of Saint Rose, Albany, NY

How would you describe your work? Can you talk through the design philosophy of Frank Collective?

It’s branding. Everything I do is some sort of brand building—whether that’s evolving, creating, or maintaining a brand through strategy, identity, web, packaging, marketing, etc. I aim for my work, and the work my team makes at Frank, to be clear, emotive, smart, and honest. Clear work is immediate. It isn’t nuanced, abstract, or understated with messaging—it communicates clearly in a way that isn’t hard to get. Clarity is so important, especially today when you have to fight for people’s attention. They aren’t waiting around for your work, nor are they endlessly nit-picking it in meetings like we do all day. When you get their attention, you only have a split-second to grab hold of it — it’s best to be clear when you do.

Honest work resonates with your target audience. They see something in it and recognize that you see them. Branding is empathy when done right. It goes beyond trends, demographics, and yourself to a big simple core truth. So don’t impose your own designer/creative/marketer viewpoint, know how to get out of your own way and get in to your audience’s mindset.

Emotive work evokes a response from your audience that no logo-generator-thing-a-bobber can create. When you elicit an emotion from someone, good or bad, you’re creating something meaningful.

Smart work is interesting. It makes you think a little and give that head nod of appreciation. That “you’re in on the joke” or the “ah that’s so cool they did that” type of acknowledgement that makes your work memorable.

If all of the above is in place, everything else should follow easily.

Where do you find inspiration?

I don’t have a single source of inspiration. This might sound cliche, but just getting out there and living life is the best kind of inspiration. Doing that allows you to build a catalogue of experiences that you can draw upon when thinking about work. And depending on what you’re working on you can find it from almost any source. That and Pinterest.

With that said, my first inspiration was my teenage obsession with freestyle BMX bikes, and I wanted to find a way to work within the industry. I thought if I was a designer I could get a job working at a bike magazine because I would be better at setting type than riding a halfpipe. While I do enjoy the work I do today, I’m still holding out for that bike magazine.

Who are some of your favorite designers or artists?

Wow. I have so many that I straight up idolize and reference constantly to my staff and students. Currently, Scott Dadich is one of my favorite designers/creative directors in recent years. I remember being so amazed by the pages of Wired when he was at the helm. I would pour over every page of it — oftentimes just gawking at the page for 1 minute saying “Damn thats amazing” then another minute going “man, I wish I did this” then another minute of “gah this is so smart! This is the stuff I want to make!” … and then I would read the article.

I also really love Aaron Draplin’s simple and entertaining explanation of his work and the total apparent joy he gets from it. He knows what he likes and does it his way unapologetically — and for good reason — he’s so talented! Read his book and its apparent that that man lives his truth.

I always liked Tibor Kalman’s wit and conceptual approach to everything. Michael Bierut’s clear and simple rationale and scalability to all his design systems. Caleb Owen Everitt’s distinct and dusty all-American style. Malika Favre’s illustrations are beyond smart and masterful – I can look at them all day long.  

Do you have a favorite among all the projects you’ve worked on?

I don’t actually. And that’s because I don’t have a single favorite project. I like many projects for many reasons.

I really love when we work with entrepreneurs who are passionate about what they’re doing, and we can bring it to life for them. These are people who are betting the farm on an idea they have and have a lot of pressure to deliver on that idea from investors, family, friends, and themselves. Giving shape and form to a brand for them is very fulfilling for myself and my team. We really get invested in their vision.

I also always dig a project if I’m working on it with great people that I want to be around. It doesn’t matter what it is. It could be a crazy last minute deadline, a simple revision to a brand guideline, or a pro-bono project for a friend. As long as I’m working with people that I enjoy being around it’s all good in my book.

Is there a project that stands out to you as having been the biggest challenge of your career so far?

This isn’t necessarily something that is remotely a challenge today, but back when I was getting started, it was a really tough thing for me to learn — and is something that I hope I never lose sight of. And that is: anything and everything can be awesome.

I was in my first year at Radical Media and it was time to review with our creative director. When I start showing him the comps of the same logo over and over again at various sizes on all these t-shirt mockups, he just says “Would you wear this t-shirt? Do you think its cool?” 22-year-old me just says, “it’s what we designed though.” He asked me again “yeah but is this the coolest t-shirt ever? Would you wear this out tonight with your friends? If you don’t think it’s cool then how will I? And then how will our client?”

This was the first time that I realized that everything and anything can and should be awesome. And branding is a way of surfacing that innate awesomeness. It’s a challenge to do this but you can make anything interesting if you try. A few years ago you wouldn’t care much about a meal prep service, but you care about Blue Apron today. Socks, have you ever heard a more boring word such as socks? But what about Bombas? They’re awesome! Why? Because they aren’t just socks – they’re Bombas, a better sock both functionally and ethically.

I understood what had to be done in that moment and went into a t-shirt designing fever dream. And made the coolest t-shirts I could with the elements I had to work with.

What’s your best advice for designers today? Should designers follow “best practices”?

Don’t follow trends blindly. Acknowledge them, critique them, understand what works and why—then take that into account as you make something that works for your task at hand. Just because it worked well for someone else doesn’t mean it will work for you.

You’re a consumer too. Step back often and ask yourself “If I never saw this — does it make sense?” So many times I’ve done this with my own work and its been for the better.

If you’re in a meeting debating the color with someone, you’re having the wrong conversation. What I mean by that is everything you do should have purpose and intention. You are a designer, so nothing should be a flippant design decision. You chose that typeface for some rational reason. You made the very specific color palette because it evoked an energy. The tone of voice you selected is relatable. As the designer you know why you made these decisions, but it’s often hard to put them into words or we forget that not everyone is a designer.

Find more Frank Collective here and more Mike here.

Interview by Daniel Schloss

The post Mike Wasilewski on Purpose, Clarity, and Making Cool Things appeared first on HOW Design.

Mike Wasilewski on Purpose, Clarity, and Making Cool Things syndicated post

[calvinlepesh]

Interpret how u please but know it saved my mind and soul.

SUMMARYWe have primitive speech in comparison to aliens/ superior being/s/ {Our God self]DONT FUCKING READ THIS IF U ARENT OPEN MINDED! DEADASS FUCKING SERIOUS UR GONNA MISS OUT.to become open minded you must have some form of empathy. Some form meaning you must have to have either the almost perfect understanding empathy based on your ability to place yourself in somebody elses position along with all of their past tramas, what they just fucking ate, basically whatever relevant to the situation apparent or not. I.E do I help this guy for gas hes asking the clerk hes begging he says hes got no money has to get home to his family. seems like a good dude. not making a fuss. being very nice about it. I paid for his fucking gas. Thats good energy right there. sent away and returned in ways that probably already occured but I don't reconize them as a direct result from helping. If you did what you thought was right or whatever you wanted to do actually. Which is what you're going to do anyways cause thats what you fucking decieded you wanted yourself to do. So if this doesn't hit you like it hits most people and myself included. Then just close the book and call me insane. If being insane is living content in my beliefs and my tommorow during the today but with passion for the future. then im fucking insane. Because thats what my program has done for me Truly search for good and if it isn't what you want to spend your time trying to help or doesnt concern you. You weren't meant to be concerened by it and thats okay because it will concern someone else at the right time. etc considered and making a choice based off of critical information secured from a display of empathy. If you cant show empathy practice please fucking practice before you continue reading. Actually idgaf you do you. Your life do what you desire.Speech is used to manifest things into reality of time. Typically faster if done consistently. Tested and proved. By many. My barber for example. little over 7 months ago living in a 1 bed room dumb girlfriend cat and hes cutting hair in his kitchen. The entire time throughout the year  hes telling me about this house hes getting his own very first house brand fucking new completely taylored to him. He told me saying Lep yeah my mom is helping me buy a house and get my career moving finally. After long periods of being told to basically fuck off his mom basically has a change of heart randomly. Hes got a 3 bedroom house. A barber room with checkered floot. 3 tvs niceass fucking interior furniture hes painting the house and has done many renovations over the last few months of him having this house. Just returning there earlier tonight actually I had walked in and had to check if he changed the paint in his front room again! Truly He doesn't even realize it completely. Hes almost so dumb hes smart. in a sense that being happy is being smart. He isn't stupid tho. My barber is on some of the same shit I am. Some. thats a different story tho. The point is he talked to me everytime he cut my hair for 6 month. Not just me I know for certain. He would talk motherfuckers ears off im sure they hated it. Honestly I hadn't been enlightened at this point. I fucking hated it. OMg yeah we fucking get it bro u want checkered floors. So many motherfuckers are talking nowadays. But do they always talk the same shiteveryday? Ill say it again. Do you talk about the same thing everysingle day? Do you talk to someone every single day? I don' t even have to ask what or why you do it. You're doing it because you have the desire of the company of that person. or their opinion, Whatever they have of value or beneficially or mutually beneficially to you or both. My barber talked about all the cool shit he was gonna do with his house. Having a pit bike track in the back. making a fire bit. building a deck. Making a TV back drop out of stained wood stained nailed and cut by him and I. Painted the entire house. CHECKERED FLOORS MOTHERFUCKERS. ALL YOU HAVE TO DO is MANIFEST IT IN YOUR LIFE. The sooner you start talking about and creating this lifestyle and figuring out how you're going to do it one day at a time. Talk to the person ur nervous to talk to. If they fall in love with you. THATS FUCKING KICKASS. if he thinks u dont belong in his universe right now understand thats a huge fucking positive in your life. Now you can live in this moment in time and know in this moment in time that it isn't happening because if it isn't meant to happen yet if at all. For all you know you could meet  him in 5 years and get married have 3 kids live happily ever after. Straight the fuck up! Right now im consistently talking to a girl i had the hugest crush on but never did anything about it. WHY DIDN'T I DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT. CAUSE HOW FUCKING AWKWARD WOULD IT HAVE BEEN in minnesota when im visiiting and havent been home for christmas in 5 years that we just so happen to go get breakfest at a taveren like wtf? and its where she works serving. Top it off while we are walking in I see the sign of the place and reconize it from an instagram post that she posted and I had liked and inturn she liked my picture. whatever not important. all im trying to say is the future is 100% unpredictable in every sense. but at the same time it will be 100% guarenteed with my mindset program if applied properly. You never know tomorrow and that may scare you but what if you already had chosen what happens tomorrow long before anything existed? Do you trust your own judgement? The best part is you dont even have to trust your own judgement. YOU DONT HAVE TO DO ANYTHING YOU DONT WANT TO DO. But sometimes doing them is what you're meant to do typically for your benefit anyways, if not its a punishment, and if it isn't your benefit its somebody elses and they may or may not know that you're the direct cause. you may or may not know ever. But I believe that when we die we are enlightened and are shown the purpose to life. whether a test or a simulation. multiple tests inside one another or something uncomprehensible to myself or anyone. But thats different. What I do know is that a key to a good life Is a good mindset. Choose the mindset of I'm the shit. Cause I am, Cause I decieded I am, Im good fucking looking, People may call you a slut or whore but honestly it may be disgusting a little bit but they're probably jealous of all the hot people you've been with. Or even the fact ur getting laid. most single people hate on girls anyway. aint no boy in a nice healthy relationship talking shit on females and if he is he probably likes u and is trying to hide it. anyways besides the point. You need to develop something you say to yourself {I recommend} outloud {especially for getting started} whether written or set as an alarm for your phone ur background to your phone it could be a picture with a completely hidden message behind it. just associate something or have something that has things you know deep down in your soul you need to say to yourself. For example for me, Ive always been sensitive, still am a lot less than I was alot, But over time After being outcasted from my family at 15 being legally kiddnapped, and broken down on all aspects of self with many failed although maybe not completely failed attempts at bettering myself to the way that works for normies or the purposefully chosen people to be uneducated of the power of speech. They were esentially taking me in at 15 with a metaphorical emotionally broken leg. { ie i hate myself and im a bad person i dont give a fuck and i just want to die cause i dont understand the world} that was my attitude ie the broken metaphorical leg that I came into the school but for the sake of this metaphor this hospital with. However pretend in our metaphor the break in my leg is un noticeable. if ur slow as fuck just know the broken leg is a metaphor for my fucked up thinking. The hospitol or treatment center/school I was at cant fix my leg without me telling them my leg is broken. Now they knew something is wrong or else I wouldnt be there. Many claim at that hospital upon recent arrival that there's been a mistake and they don't need to be there. many times I laughed with everyone else at group along with the director Parker. Parker I believe knows alot about this but would never share with the group for possiblities of the kids claiming they're being brain washed or told to believe such things without an adult or atleast enlightened soul and mind these practices may sound slightly lucritive. Anyway back to the story. Metaphorically I tried many times to dodge and weave around questions asked in therapy sometimes even hamming it up to seem cool because of how insecure I was. trying to seek acceptance from my therapist lmfao very dark times. Which got darker with small light at the end of the tunnel. Thats the thing about parker he never took away full hope and if he did he had a good reason for doing so. I completely trust his judgement even to this day. Lying to ur therapist or even if they think you're lying to your therapist which usually they're right. The only reason they were ever wrong with me lying was because the decision was made based on previous situations of past lies. Lied before you'll lie again? possibly. Anyway, the darkness brought upon u metaphorically and almost not was the wall/work crew. ADAYONTHEWALL In a way this is tramatic but it almost shouldnt be. It was trautic because I put myself there many times. Purposefully yes in a sense but not the living sense. I wanted to be the perfect student at Liahona. Be the leader everyone looked up to. Be the family fucking leader. But I literally just was to immature and weak in all aspects. Too much so to do any of those things. Now that I think back the beauty of it Is I did eventually get all of those things. Because I manifested them. I desired both with my words and the vibes my words created in my body that the universe recieved. My body had translated what I wrote in my daily evals every night at Liahona. I attended Liahona for 711 days. 9 Days short from 2 years. The program is 9 months long. Back to the main subject. The wall. 6 am wake the fuck up. HEADCOUUUUUNT!!!. Big ass motherfucking dude named Quando shouts it at the top of his lungs. LMFAO pretty funny to think but this guy would scare the shit out of new kids in the mornings. shouting out of their beds. I definitely woke up thats for sure. The whole facility of 50-60 boys come out of there room pretty much as fast as possible although groggily everyone dressed in the same navy blue shorts and grey liahona t-shit tucked into our gym shorts with either white black or grey solid socks. No designs or wild shit. All the rules at Liahona were created over the years it had transitioned from an old house to the facility to the newer facility. Everything from tuck in ur chair at all times to. turn off the lights when you leave a room. Hundred of rules probably around over a thousand actually. I hated it off the bat but what was I gonna do? anyway. After everyone lines up in a U- formation with quando standing in the open portion of the U. He would say the same things every morning. Almost as if he was designed to say the same or relatively the same thing. One thing was for sure the message was clear every morning. Go back to your rooms  Today is a new day its a beautiful day make your beds and start studying your quote or doing whatever you're aloud to do until you go for the morning run and breakfest. Now quado probably used a great deal more broken english being from the pacific islands one of em sorry dont actually know. anyways. we dismiss. or atleast. everybody else does. perusual here I am. I sit down in my LIFETIME costco chair sitting mere inches from the head of my twin mattress. I will now sit in this chair for the remainder of the day unless instructed or allowed otherwise. 6-7 morning shift arrives. Can't look away. I think to myself staring at the wall. The desire to look is bad but even the thought of having to write another 300 word essay although they've become easy now, pointless to get one for something so easily avoidable. putting my elbows on my knees I duck my head do as If to pretend im studying the quote (a passage of around 100 words- alot of fucking words that must be memorized in full word for word straight the fuck up and recited to either a very trusted upper level or staff member who will tell you when you mess up and must stop and either use one of 2 hints allowed by parker to figure out whatever word u forgot or fail and take a 300 word essay, However if the quote is failed to be passed off before friday then your points for that week will be cut into half basically prolonging your stay to an extent given points are used to determine not in full but definitely play a large part in even the opportunity of you being recommended to get your next level Ie the quote is very important, very difficult, and I fucking hated it so fucking much you have no idea, Fuck the fucking stupid fucking quote. Parker is smart for the fact that he knows theres got to be something that seems and may possibly be a punishment that is time consuming and benefits those who work harder and faster destroying room for socialism. Basically parker created the quote to see who the fuck is really trying and how hard. Based on when you pass off the quote, If you pass off the quote, and how long of the quote is and whats in the quote. Parker can determine your loyalty to the program and therefore your recovery) Sitting in my chair and ducking my head between my armpits I can finally look around in a small area on each side of my body without getting too ballsy. This is my entertainment for the remainder of the day. Besides playing with my hand/feet. Tapping my feet/hand. looking at the US map{ and sometimes if they put u on the other wall or farther down you got the south america map. To this day can name the south american countries for the most part in alphabetical order. Crazylol. I can do the states right now. anyways. } Eating Oats and water with 2 of the gnarliest fucking red delicious apples every fucking morning. YO WHERE DID U FIND THOSE FUCKING APPLES MARK AND WHOEVER THE FUCK SHOPPED? jesus christ. Still don't eat red delicious apples THERE NOT FUCKING delicious. liars anyway. Before that when morning shift arrives typically shortly after if not immediately after their arrival we do another headcount. Of course yelled much less.... whats the word.... manly lol. Derek had the lamest headcount call. His unenthusiastic Severous snape from harry potter like almost moan like noise. anyways fuck u derek. Derek would take us to get our shoes, at both the new and old facility there are shoe closets that contain every students single pair of running shoes. The new facility also has our never to be touched til we leave or go on a visit personal items. After getting our shoes on. We went outside. line up on the concrete basket ball court in 5 lines spanning accross the entire court each student assigned to a 'family' upon arrival in no paticular order I hope but idk. Usually it was the one with the lowest amount of students but some family leaders would try to boost by trying to speak with newer students asap and within the rules. Communication of any kind with any student not directly monitored without being directly told otherwise is strictly forbidden. No form of communication head bobs nods winks smiles smirks laughs even eye contact for long periods of time. Although of course these rules were broken many times over the course of my stay. I definitely stopped talking to kids. Literally it taught me and im kinda glad it did it taught me to not ask my peers but elder people with wisdom and knowledge for help. However in therapy groups they allow us to communicate freely with the presnence of the therapist who was 1 of two therapists. However he would quickly correct any advice given from a student to a student to not only teach us the correct way to solve whatever issue being discussed  or shared. but almost in a way indirectly teaching you that experience and age are similar but not the same and to seek those that give the best advice and help the most which tend to be the people u want anyways. I did learn many many many many useful things that I still use today from Liahona. Because of going im now 1000x ahead of an average person my age. Given my experiences and newly found and enlightened self. Given to me when I was ready to give it to myself. When I learned I control this reality with how I feel. And I tend to feel how I talk. Because my talk conveys my emotion. Talk good feel good do good deserve good. Lined up on the basketball court right my bad Im side tracked for the millionth time. gimme a break lol anyways. We line up in  5 columns of anywhere from 10 to 13 students typically ten atleast. 50 jumping jacks Go!" 1..2..3..4..5..6..7- ......49..50.  50 laps chop it up. At 8 laps a mile  50 laps was common but not that common. For awhile it was daily. All of our days depended on how all of us acted as a whole. If one person tried to run and doesnt succeed obvisouly never have never will. Everybody goes on lock down. No talking no moving everybody sits  in a circle. study a gigantic quote for that week cause homeboy tried running. or whatever the case is. Basically if you dont pull your weight somebody else has to and that weight is only their cause you are inturn now they hate u lol. Definitely was unlike for a vast majority by the vast majority however luckily in the end all works out as does all things in this universe in my world or currently my world.story sorry again 50 pushups now in unicen aswell 123-49-50 Then he tells us to go run and sometimes he'll tell u how many laps and sometimes hed tell u when you get to his standing spot at the finish line after your first lap. He does this to guage how and when certain students put in more effort. Shorter run? more harder runners? longer run? Whos putting in effort regardless of circumstance ie whats going on in ur life. Ie how many laps you got How are you moving before you know what your next move is. Are you jogging that first lap until derek tells you to save your breath cause you're banking on it being a longer run. Have you been running slow for 3 laps but the run was only 8 today so ur wasting ur time being lazy. Derek would see when you would run hard. who made u run harder cause u wanted to beat them. how many laps does it have to be minimum to run on the first lap. Whos running hard the first lap regardless of circumstance. They could tell who you were and what you could offer before you even knew anything about any of that. Because honestly you didnt give a fuck about trying before. atleast I didn't. I soon did. Over those 711 days I ran 95 percent of the week day mornings. was in niceass shape too for 17. weekends we got off thankf uckign god. After the blisters heal and you get calices on ur feet from running in the beginning being a new student it sucks alot don't get me wrong and it'll suck for awhile but you'll eventually learn to adapt and conquer by anymeans. I quit after 6 laps my first run. Not even a mile. sat down said I needed my inhaler. I didn't even have one.

[apsbicepstraining]

A Time Of Undertaking: 6 Styles To Become A Badass World Traveler In 2016

As 2015 comes to a open, its normal to get romantic and start looking back on the memories constructed over the past year.

Every year has its ups and downs, and some are more fateful than others.

But as I began to think about my 26 th year and the ones before it, I realized for me, theres one fool-proof lane to stir recalls that will stand out in my mind forever, and that mode is to travel.

On top of the priceless knows that “re coming with” exploring a brand-new region, traveling obligates you a most independent, open-minded party and teaches you life assignments you might never learnt cooped up at home.

So while your health and fitness destinations and saving coin are important( and Im right there with you on those, extremely ), I would argue that we should all puttraveling more towards the top of our to-do rosters for2 016.

To help, I reached out to two millennial wandering bloggers who are killing video games, Brooke Saward of World of Wanderlust and Trevor Morrow of Trevor Morrow Travel, to be determined how we can all realize interpreting “the worlds” a realistic resolution in 2016.

Get your priorities in order.

Whether its limited vacation eras or a lack of funds, its easy to make excuses when it comes to travel.

Morrow, who is based in Los Angeles and has done everything from Tarzan-ing in the jungle to brewery hopping in Australia, declares his globetrotting lifestyle isnt plausible for everyone, but he enunciates if there is even the smallestamount of wiggle area in national budgets, all you have to do is prioritize.

He responds,

If gazing fresh is your priority, youll waste your extra money on clothes. If sitting at home and playing video games is your priority, youll invest your money on the latest PlayStation. If traveling is your priority…well, you find where Im departing. You have to really want to travel. Just like you have to really want to break a bad dres or genuinely wishes to get in shape to supersede. If “youre going” it, youll figure out a acces to make it happen. Its as simple as that.

Start out small.

So perhaps you cant afford a ticket around the world just yet. The key thenis to think local.

Morrow mentions,

Try to take three long weekend expeditions this year. Boom, youre now a traveler. Wake up early one Saturday morning and drive a few hours to the nearest big city — devour a cuisine youve never hard-handed before( perhaps Malaysian) and keep walking a neighborhood like youre a neighbourhood. Boom, youre now a traveler.

Saward, who booked a one-way ticket from her dwelling on the Australian island of Tasmania to London in 2012 on the day of her college graduation and has been at it ever since, agrees.

She speaks,

It always surprises me how much enjoyable you can have by only making a short road excursion to the beach or trekking a nearby mountain. One of my favorite things to do is re-explore my home.

Be smart with your money.

Both Saward and Morrow have learned to apply expedition first when it comes to spending.

For Morrow, that means restraint how many times he dines out per month and manufacturing his own lunches every day.

For Saward, its ridding herself of properties she doesnt require, and locating free activities to do with friends.

She alleges,

Taking all your old invests and belongings to a weekend market is a great way to reach some quick currency, as is selling your gondola. Wreaking extra alters not only sets more money in the bank but too impedes you from spending money going out with sidekicks so often, and over time you realize there are plenty of free replacements like catching up with a acquaintance for a strength walk instead of spending money used to go for lunch.

Of course, both are also pros at being thrifty on the road when necessary.

Morrow shows leasing an Airbnb or trying out dwelling exchanges, Couchsurfing, and WWOOF-ing.

Saward is a fan of the app HotelQuickly , which labor kind of like Uber, but for last-minute hotels.

Both advocated grabbing providings at neighbourhood markets instead of dining out for every snack, and taking advantage of free walking tours. Morrow does,

Im a big devotee of Sandemans New Europe Tours. They render great free walking tours in a variety of European metropolis. I think its an awesome happening to do on your first day in town.

Morrow also recommends the book How To Trip The World On $50 A Day by Matt Kepnes, and Saward wrote a upright titled “50 Space I Saved( A Lot) Of Money To Trip The World”on her blog.

Do your research, but be flexible.

Saward isa visual person who starts projecting a potential trip-up as soon as a photo catches her eye.

Morrow has a directory of ends a mile long, but he speaks its important to be flexible.

Be is accessible to what moves your way naturally. If a pal asks you to travel to a destination youve never daydreamed about, consider exiting! Or if you hear about a concerted effort or a celebration that piques your interest, bulge that end up on your schedule so you wont miss it.

It can also be helpful to plan your journeys based on the time of year( Is it rainy season in August? Will it be packed with tourists in June ?), Morrow suggests, and dont keep forgetting current exchange rates.

Ive been to Europe when the Euro is killing the U s dollars, and Ive been in Europe when the Dollar and Euro are on equivalence. Its much, much more fun to make( to Europe or anywhere) when you can stimulate your fund go further.

Dont be afraid to travel alone.

Working around your own planned is hard enough, which is why many of “the worlds” top jaunt bloggers, Saward and Morrow included, often roam alone.

Saward says hugging the no commitments stage of their own lives realise it easier to jump right in.

She adds,

It pressured me to rely only on myself, which is a really humbling knowledge, just knowing that if your entire world was taken away from you, you could make it on your own.

Morrow remembers how he was scared shitless on the plane to Nepal alone at age 18.

But let me tell you, when you return home, youll be confidently swaggering through international airports high-fiving strangers( or at the least thats how youll look ). Are well aware that you may be scared now, and thats normal, but youll be very proud of yourself for doing it. Derive confidence from knowing that traveling alone realise you a badass. Thoughts about those people sitting at home, afraid to go out and suffer “the worlds”. Do you really want to be one of those people? No!

Both travelers agree that the world isnt as creepy as it looks on TV.

Morrow tells,

In general, beings are route more category and good natured than the mainstream media would have you believe. Be street smart, be informed about, be informed, but dont be scared. Oh yeah, and dont be afraid to strike up a communication with beings at your inn/ hostel, at a bar, or on the street. If it gets weird, who attends, youll never attend them again.

Do it right while youre young.

Whatever stage in life you get bitten by the travel defect, own it! But the earlier “youre starting”, the easier it to be able to reap the benefits.

For Saward, who recommends everyone obligate Southeast Asia, South America and a Eurotrip priorities in their twenties, traveling young mean becoming more self-confident in herself.

I became a person I actually like to be around. Before advance I cared too much about what others thought of me and didn’t just knowing that I did and didn’t like( because I wasn’t intrepid enough to try anything new ).

Morrow points out that a well-traveled resume sees you a better being on paper and off.

He reads,

Aside from realizing you a lane more interesting party at parties, traveling while youre young can really change the rest of their own lives. Traveling builds you kinder, more understanding, more patient, more self sufficient — certainly potential benefits are interminable. And its not mentioned often, but the experiences had and sciences acquired from traveling while youre young, especially for longer periods of time or in places that one might consider challenging, can really be selling items in a job interview.

He proposes three types of tours for millennial travelers to kick off your 2016 bucket index TAGEND

1. Lead somewhere as geographically far from being, and as culturally differences between, your residence as you can. And if you can, stay here for as long as possible. A few illustrations would be places like India, Nepal or Japan.

2. Travel in your “countries “. Its easy to be seduced by beautiful photos to foreign targets, but its important be informed about the two countries you call dwelling and the ones who inhabit it. America is utterly gargantuan, and diverse, and beautiful. Take a superhighway trip-up, clique, visit national parks. Visit out of the lane homes. Eat at diners. Talk to the waitress. Youll be surprised that exactly inspecting different parts of American can provide a foreign experience.

3. Party! Drink vodka in Russia, defendant on a beach in Greece, go to a nightclub in Eastern Europe. Attend Carnival in Brazil. Hangovers simply get worse as you get older, so do your party traveling now!

Well, what are you waiting for ?!

Are in favour of Elite Dailys official newsletter, The Edge, for more narrations you dont want to miss .

The post A Time Of Undertaking: 6 Styles To Become A Badass World Traveler In 2016 appeared first on apsbicepstraining.com.

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Mike Wasilewski on Purpose, Clarity, and Making Cool Things

Mike Wasilewski, Co-Founder and COO of Frank Collective, is in the business of branding and making cool things. His thoughts on design trends, inspirations, and projects are covered here.

Name: Mike Wasilewski, Co-Founder & CCO of Frank Collective Location: Brooklyn, NY Design school attended: The College of Saint Rose, Albany, NY

How would you describe your work? Can you talk through the design philosophy of Frank Collective?

It’s branding. Everything I do is some sort of brand building—whether that’s evolving, creating, or maintaining a brand through strategy, identity, web, packaging, marketing, etc. I aim for my work, and the work my team makes at Frank, to be clear, emotive, smart, and honest. Clear work is immediate. It isn’t nuanced, abstract, or understated with messaging—it communicates clearly in a way that isn’t hard to get. Clarity is so important, especially today when you have to fight for people’s attention. They aren’t waiting around for your work, nor are they endlessly nit-picking it in meetings like we do all day. When you get their attention, you only have a split-second to grab hold of it — it’s best to be clear when you do.

Honest work resonates with your target audience. They see something in it and recognize that you see them. Branding is empathy when done right. It goes beyond trends, demographics, and yourself to a big simple core truth. So don’t impose your own designer/creative/marketer viewpoint, know how to get out of your own way and get in to your audience’s mindset.

Emotive work evokes a response from your audience that no logo-generator-thing-a-bobber can create. When you elicit an emotion from someone, good or bad, you’re creating something meaningful.

Smart work is interesting. It makes you think a little and give that head nod of appreciation. That “you’re in on the joke” or the “ah that’s so cool they did that” type of acknowledgement that makes your work memorable.

If all of the above is in place, everything else should follow easily.

Where do you find inspiration?

I don’t have a single source of inspiration. This might sound cliche, but just getting out there and living life is the best kind of inspiration. Doing that allows you to build a catalogue of experiences that you can draw upon when thinking about work. And depending on what you’re working on you can find it from almost any source. That and Pinterest.

With that said, my first inspiration was my teenage obsession with freestyle BMX bikes, and I wanted to find a way to work within the industry. I thought if I was a designer I could get a job working at a bike magazine because I would be better at setting type than riding a halfpipe. While I do enjoy the work I do today, I’m still holding out for that bike magazine.

Who are some of your favorite designers or artists?

Wow. I have so many that I straight up idolize and reference constantly to my staff and students. Currently, Scott Dadich is one of my favorite designers/creative directors in recent years. I remember being so amazed by the pages of Wired when he was at the helm. I would pour over every page of it — oftentimes just gawking at the page for 1 minute saying “Damn thats amazing” then another minute going “man, I wish I did this” then another minute of “gah this is so smart! This is the stuff I want to make!” … and then I would read the article.

I also really love Aaron Draplin’s simple and entertaining explanation of his work and the total apparent joy he gets from it. He knows what he likes and does it his way unapologetically — and for good reason — he’s so talented! Read his book and its apparent that that man lives his truth.

I always liked Tibor Kalman’s wit and conceptual approach to everything. Michael Bierut’s clear and simple rationale and scalability to all his design systems. Caleb Owen Everitt’s distinct and dusty all-American style. Malika Favre’s illustrations are beyond smart and masterful – I can look at them all day long.  

Do you have a favorite among all the projects you’ve worked on?

I don’t actually. And that’s because I don’t have a single favorite project. I like many projects for many reasons.

I really love when we work with entrepreneurs who are passionate about what they’re doing, and we can bring it to life for them. These are people who are betting the farm on an idea they have and have a lot of pressure to deliver on that idea from investors, family, friends, and themselves. Giving shape and form to a brand for them is very fulfilling for myself and my team. We really get invested in their vision.

I also always dig a project if I’m working on it with great people that I want to be around. It doesn’t matter what it is. It could be a crazy last minute deadline, a simple revision to a brand guideline, or a pro-bono project for a friend. As long as I’m working with people that I enjoy being around it’s all good in my book.

Is there a project that stands out to you as having been the biggest challenge of your career so far?

This isn’t necessarily something that is remotely a challenge today, but back when I was getting started, it was a really tough thing for me to learn — and is something that I hope I never lose sight of. And that is: anything and everything can be awesome.

I was in my first year at Radical Media and it was time to review with our creative director. When I start showing him the comps of the same logo over and over again at various sizes on all these t-shirt mockups, he just says “Would you wear this t-shirt? Do you think its cool?” 22-year-old me just says, “it’s what we designed though.” He asked me again “yeah but is this the coolest t-shirt ever? Would you wear this out tonight with your friends? If you don’t think it’s cool then how will I? And then how will our client?”

This was the first time that I realized that everything and anything can and should be awesome. And branding is a way of surfacing that innate awesomeness. It’s a challenge to do this but you can make anything interesting if you try. A few years ago you wouldn’t care much about a meal prep service, but you care about Blue Apron today. Socks, have you ever heard a more boring word such as socks? But what about Bombas? They’re awesome! Why? Because they aren’t just socks – they’re Bombas, a better sock both functionally and ethically.

I understood what had to be done in that moment and went into a t-shirt designing fever dream. And made the coolest t-shirts I could with the elements I had to work with.

What’s your best advice for designers today? Should designers follow “best practices”?

Don’t follow trends blindly. Acknowledge them, critique them, understand what works and why—then take that into account as you make something that works for your task at hand. Just because it worked well for someone else doesn’t mean it will work for you.

You’re a consumer too. Step back often and ask yourself “If I never saw this — does it make sense?” So many times I’ve done this with my own work and its been for the better.

If you’re in a meeting debating the color with someone, you’re having the wrong conversation. What I mean by that is everything you do should have purpose and intention. You are a designer, so nothing should be a flippant design decision. You chose that typeface for some rational reason. You made the very specific color palette because it evoked an energy. The tone of voice you selected is relatable. As the designer you know why you made these decisions, but it’s often hard to put them into words or we forget that not everyone is a designer.

Find more Frank Collective here and more Mike here.

Interview by Daniel Schloss

The post Mike Wasilewski on Purpose, Clarity, and Making Cool Things appeared first on HOW Design.

Mike Wasilewski on Purpose, Clarity, and Making Cool Things syndicated post

[apsbicepstraining]

A Time Of Undertaking: 6 Styles To Become A Badass World Traveler In 2016

As 2015 comes to a open, its normal to get romantic and start looking back on the memories constructed over the past year.

Every year has its ups and downs, and some are more fateful than others.

But as I began to think about my 26 th year and the ones before it, I realized for me, theres one fool-proof lane to stir recalls that will stand out in my mind forever, and that mode is to travel.

On top of the priceless knows that “re coming with” exploring a brand-new region, traveling obligates you a most independent, open-minded party and teaches you life assignments you might never learnt cooped up at home.

So while your health and fitness destinations and saving coin are important( and Im right there with you on those, extremely ), I would argue that we should all puttraveling more towards the top of our to-do rosters for2 016.

To help, I reached out to two millennial wandering bloggers who are killing video games, Brooke Saward of World of Wanderlust and Trevor Morrow of Trevor Morrow Travel, to be determined how we can all realize interpreting “the worlds” a realistic resolution in 2016.

Get your priorities in order.

Whether its limited vacation eras or a lack of funds, its easy to make excuses when it comes to travel.

Morrow, who is based in Los Angeles and has done everything from Tarzan-ing in the jungle to brewery hopping in Australia, declares his globetrotting lifestyle isnt plausible for everyone, but he enunciates if there is even the smallestamount of wiggle area in national budgets, all you have to do is prioritize.

He responds,

If gazing fresh is your priority, youll waste your extra money on clothes. If sitting at home and playing video games is your priority, youll invest your money on the latest PlayStation. If traveling is your priority…well, you find where Im departing. You have to really want to travel. Just like you have to really want to break a bad dres or genuinely wishes to get in shape to supersede. If “youre going” it, youll figure out a acces to make it happen. Its as simple as that.

Start out small.

So perhaps you cant afford a ticket around the world just yet. The key thenis to think local.

Morrow mentions,

Try to take three long weekend expeditions this year. Boom, youre now a traveler. Wake up early one Saturday morning and drive a few hours to the nearest big city — devour a cuisine youve never hard-handed before( perhaps Malaysian) and keep walking a neighborhood like youre a neighbourhood. Boom, youre now a traveler.

Saward, who booked a one-way ticket from her dwelling on the Australian island of Tasmania to London in 2012 on the day of her college graduation and has been at it ever since, agrees.

She speaks,

It always surprises me how much enjoyable you can have by only making a short road excursion to the beach or trekking a nearby mountain. One of my favorite things to do is re-explore my home.

Be smart with your money.

Both Saward and Morrow have learned to apply expedition first when it comes to spending.

For Morrow, that means restraint how many times he dines out per month and manufacturing his own lunches every day.

For Saward, its ridding herself of properties she doesnt require, and locating free activities to do with friends.

She alleges,

Taking all your old invests and belongings to a weekend market is a great way to reach some quick currency, as is selling your gondola. Wreaking extra alters not only sets more money in the bank but too impedes you from spending money going out with sidekicks so often, and over time you realize there are plenty of free replacements like catching up with a acquaintance for a strength walk instead of spending money used to go for lunch.

Of course, both are also pros at being thrifty on the road when necessary.

Morrow shows leasing an Airbnb or trying out dwelling exchanges, Couchsurfing, and WWOOF-ing.

Saward is a fan of the app HotelQuickly , which labor kind of like Uber, but for last-minute hotels.

Both advocated grabbing providings at neighbourhood markets instead of dining out for every snack, and taking advantage of free walking tours. Morrow does,

Im a big devotee of Sandemans New Europe Tours. They render great free walking tours in a variety of European metropolis. I think its an awesome happening to do on your first day in town.

Morrow also recommends the book How To Trip The World On $50 A Day by Matt Kepnes, and Saward wrote a upright titled “50 Space I Saved( A Lot) Of Money To Trip The World”on her blog.

Do your research, but be flexible.

Saward isa visual person who starts projecting a potential trip-up as soon as a photo catches her eye.

Morrow has a directory of ends a mile long, but he speaks its important to be flexible.

Be is accessible to what moves your way naturally. If a pal asks you to travel to a destination youve never daydreamed about, consider exiting! Or if you hear about a concerted effort or a celebration that piques your interest, bulge that end up on your schedule so you wont miss it.

It can also be helpful to plan your journeys based on the time of year( Is it rainy season in August? Will it be packed with tourists in June ?), Morrow suggests, and dont keep forgetting current exchange rates.

Ive been to Europe when the Euro is killing the U s dollars, and Ive been in Europe when the Dollar and Euro are on equivalence. Its much, much more fun to make( to Europe or anywhere) when you can stimulate your fund go further.

Dont be afraid to travel alone.

Working around your own planned is hard enough, which is why many of “the worlds” top jaunt bloggers, Saward and Morrow included, often roam alone.

Saward says hugging the no commitments stage of their own lives realise it easier to jump right in.

She adds,

It pressured me to rely only on myself, which is a really humbling knowledge, just knowing that if your entire world was taken away from you, you could make it on your own.

Morrow remembers how he was scared shitless on the plane to Nepal alone at age 18.

But let me tell you, when you return home, youll be confidently swaggering through international airports high-fiving strangers( or at the least thats how youll look ). Are well aware that you may be scared now, and thats normal, but youll be very proud of yourself for doing it. Derive confidence from knowing that traveling alone realise you a badass. Thoughts about those people sitting at home, afraid to go out and suffer “the worlds”. Do you really want to be one of those people? No!

Both travelers agree that the world isnt as creepy as it looks on TV.

Morrow tells,

In general, beings are route more category and good natured than the mainstream media would have you believe. Be street smart, be informed about, be informed, but dont be scared. Oh yeah, and dont be afraid to strike up a communication with beings at your inn/ hostel, at a bar, or on the street. If it gets weird, who attends, youll never attend them again.

Do it right while youre young.

Whatever stage in life you get bitten by the travel defect, own it! But the earlier “youre starting”, the easier it to be able to reap the benefits.

For Saward, who recommends everyone obligate Southeast Asia, South America and a Eurotrip priorities in their twenties, traveling young mean becoming more self-confident in herself.

I became a person I actually like to be around. Before advance I cared too much about what others thought of me and didn’t just knowing that I did and didn’t like( because I wasn’t intrepid enough to try anything new ).

Morrow points out that a well-traveled resume sees you a better being on paper and off.

He reads,

Aside from realizing you a lane more interesting party at parties, traveling while youre young can really change the rest of their own lives. Traveling builds you kinder, more understanding, more patient, more self sufficient — certainly potential benefits are interminable. And its not mentioned often, but the experiences had and sciences acquired from traveling while youre young, especially for longer periods of time or in places that one might consider challenging, can really be selling items in a job interview.

He proposes three types of tours for millennial travelers to kick off your 2016 bucket index TAGEND

1. Lead somewhere as geographically far from being, and as culturally differences between, your residence as you can. And if you can, stay here for as long as possible. A few illustrations would be places like India, Nepal or Japan.

2. Travel in your “countries “. Its easy to be seduced by beautiful photos to foreign targets, but its important be informed about the two countries you call dwelling and the ones who inhabit it. America is utterly gargantuan, and diverse, and beautiful. Take a superhighway trip-up, clique, visit national parks. Visit out of the lane homes. Eat at diners. Talk to the waitress. Youll be surprised that exactly inspecting different parts of American can provide a foreign experience.

3. Party! Drink vodka in Russia, defendant on a beach in Greece, go to a nightclub in Eastern Europe. Attend Carnival in Brazil. Hangovers simply get worse as you get older, so do your party traveling now!

Well, what are you waiting for ?!

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