#extra so bc my arms were so fucked up but bc family attended i had to wear a jacket the entire time to spare myself the drama hrs

[nerice]

end of high school party was so funny bc everyone was taking pictures and weeping abt it meanwhile as soon as the official bs was over me & bf & league buddy took a taxi back to my place to watch a zombie movie and pass out on the couch

#elia txts #having to wear a dress for the occasion is also one of my worst memories #extra so bc my arms were so fucked up but bc family attended i had to wear a jacket the entire time to spare myself the drama hrs #genuinely no idea how i made it thru school years n three more yrs of living at home exclusively in long sleeves. it sucked

[expectingtofly]

Not Jealous (Okay, Maybe a Little... Maybe a Lot)

8.1k

fluff, set sometime in s13, tfw gets a visit from the djinn queen

(okay so in 13x16, Cas says he killed most of the djinn guarding the Tree of Life, but this fic ignores that bc I like to think that Cas is an excellent negotiator and actually became friends with the djinn and their queen :))

also posted on ao3

created for CastielWasTheFirstTemptation for the Profound Bond Discord Exchange

Dean was having a crappy Tuesday. And he’d had plenty of experience with bad Tuesdays. 

He was sitting in the library trying to parse through a stack of books, organizing them according to random categories he was half-sure Sam had made up to specifically torture him. 

They’d been busy with hunts all month and on their one day off, Sam had decided it was “organize the bunker” day. He was downstairs in one of the storage rooms happily cataloguing away. Dean was stuck up here, doing the same thing, less happily. 

He was tossing a book onto the Sewer Dwelling Monsters pile when the bunker door screeched open. 

“Hey,” he called, grabbing another book and leafing through it. “You better have remembered to pick up beer and pie because I’m going crazy here.”

“Dean, we have a visitor.”

And that’s when Dean’s Tuesday got worse. 

Dean looked up to see Cas standing on the stairway next to a ridiculously tall man—and that was saying something when they lived with Sasquatch himself. Dean only needed one look at the black tattoos snaking over the man’s bald head and forearms to realize he was a Djinn.

Quickly, Dean stood, pushing his chair back. “Who the hell are you?” he demanded.

The man fixed him with a heavy stare, then proceeded to scan the room. Cas spoke up, “Don’t worry, he’s not a threat.” To the man, he said, “I promise it’s safe in here.”

“What—” Dean started, then the man nodded once and motioned to someone beyond the doorway. 

In a loud voice, he announced, “May I present Queen of the Djinn, her majesty Zara.”

At his words, a woman swept through the door, dressed in a long, dark cloak, her arms and neck also covered in Djinn tattoos.

“Why, Castiel,” she said, gazing around the room. “What a lovely home you have. I have to say, though, I didn’t expect you to live underground.”

“I’m sorry,” Dean spoke up. “Who the fuck are you?”

The woman turned her eyes on him and Cas shifted uncomfortably. He was holding several reusable grocery bags in his hands. “Dean, this is Zara. My, uh, betrothed.”

“Your what?” Dean spluttered and the woman—Queen Zara, apparently—started down the stairs, her dress and cloak sweeping behind her. 

“You must be Dean Winchester,” she said. “Castiel told me about you.” Reaching the bottom of the staircase, she extended her hand palm down, and Dean stared at it. He settled on shaking it, unsure whether she was expecting him to bow or kiss her hand. 

“Sorry, can we back up for a second?” He looked up at Cas who was following the other Djinn down the stairs. “Did you say betrothed?”

“Yes,” Zara answered brightly. 

“Okay,” Dean said, slowly, unsure if he was understanding this correctly. Cas looked a little guilty. “Care to elaborate, Cas?”

“I may have technically become married to Zara when I went in search of the fruit of the Tree of Life.” Dean raised his eyebrows, and he added, “And I may have forgotten to tell you.”

“You forgot to tell me?” Dean repeated. 

“I was going to,” Cas said. “But then we ended up in that cartoon with the talking dog and there was so much going on—”

“If I may,” Zara interjected, and Dean realized Zara and the man, presumably her bodyguard, were watching them go back and forth. “I see there’s been a miscommunication. See, when Castiel arrived for negotiations to obtain the fruit of the Tree of Life, we Djinn were in the middle of a war. I asked for Castiel’s hand in marriage in exchange for giving him the fruit, and we pledged ourselves to each other, agreeing to hold the official binding ceremonies later when the war didn’t require all my focus.” 

Dean glared at Cas. Pledged themselves to each other? Cas ducked his head with a sheepish look and set his grocery bags on the table.

Unbothered, Zara continued, “Now that the war has ended, I am able to turn my thoughts towards finalizing our relationship. I came to reunite with dear Castiel and bring him back to my kingdom for our official wedding ceremony.”

“Hold on,” Dean spoke up. “Wedding? Bring him back—Cas ain’t gonna marry you.”

Zara’s eye twitched. “I think that’s up to Castiel, isn’t it, Dean?”

Dean looked to Cas for help, who spoke up, “I’m afraid Dean is right, Zara. I’m sorry, but I don’t think I realized the extent of the commitment I made. I can’t marry you.”

Dean eyed Zara and her bodyguard, tensing for a fight, but Zara’s reaction was only to smile and pat Cas’ shoulder. 

“It’s no surprise that you would feel that way, Castiel,” she said. “We hardly know each other, after all. I confess, part of my reasoning for journeying here was to see the real you, to learn about you. I’m eager for us to grow closer during our time together.”

“During our time—” Dean was interrupted by Zara clapping her hands. Instantly, the bunker door opened to admit a line of other Djinn who filed down the stairs, all carrying baskets or trunks or cases.

Dean stared at them. “What the fuck…” 

“There’s more of them,” Cas said unhelpfully.

“Alright, we need to talk.” Grabbing Cas’ arm, Dean pulled him into the adjacent hallway. “Stay right there!” he told Zara, jabbing his finger at her.

“Dean, I’m sorry,” Cas started as Dean dragged him into the hallway. 

“Dude, what the fuck? Getting freaking engaged to a Djinn isn’t just something you forget to tell us about!”

“I was preoccupied!” Cas protested.

“And now you’re gonna let them into the bunker? Are you crazy?”

“They’re not a threat, Dean. Zara is very different from the Djinn we’ve encountered before.”

Footsteps sounded behind them and Dean turned to see Sam running over. “What’s going on out here, what’s all that noise?”

“We’ve been invaded by the Djinn,” Dean said, and Sam’s eyes widened. 

“What? How? I’ll grab guns—”

“No, Sam.” Cas put out his hand to stop Sam from bolting down the hallway. “It’s not like that, they’re friendly.”

“Oh, so now you’re buddies with them?” Dean asked. 

Cas shot him a look and started explaining the situation to Sam. Shaking his head, Dean peeked out through the doorway to watch the Djinn pile their belongings on the map table, Zara giving instructions. 

Preoccupied? Really? Then again, communication never had been one of his and Cas’ strengths. 

There were about ten other Djinn besides Zara and her bodyguard. One of the men set down a large trunk and Dean winced at the scuffing noise it made on the floor. Then the man opened the trunk and Dean startled, realizing it was filled with weapons and blades.

“Hey!” he protested, storming into the room. “No weapons allowed in here. You don’t wanna start something with us, this is our home turf.”

The bodyguard stepped forward, cracking his knuckles, but Zara only laughed. “This is a friendly visit, Dean, I assure you. These items are for Castiel, as part of my dowry.” She brightened, seeing Sam and Cas enter the room. “Sam Winchester, I presume?” She extended her hand. “It is a pleasure to meet you.”

Sam took her hand and made an awkward nod, half bow. “Um, uh, pleasure."

“Charming,” Zara said with a laugh. She looked at Cas. “You were right, he does have such beautiful hair.”

Dean rolled his eyes and Zara motioned around the room. “As you can see, we’ve brought quite a few things. Would you mind having your attendants show mine to the cookery? We brought food for a feast.”

“Um, we don’t have attendants,” Cas said. He looked to Dean for help, and when Dean didn’t offer any assistance—Cas was the one who had gotten them into this mess—he said, “I can show you around.” 

He headed off with Zara, her attendants holding baskets of food, and her bodyguard, who cast a suspicious look at Dean before following. 

Dean glared at their retreating backs. “A feast? What the hell is happening?”

“She seems nice,” Sam commented. 

“Nice? Did you miss the part where she’s engaged to Cas?”

“Yeah. Weird.” He started for the library. “I think we have a few books on Djinn. I wonder how binding their engagements are.”

Dean stared at his retreating back, then at the doorway where Cas and the Djinn had left through. “What the hell is going on?” he asked aloud.

A peek into the kitchen showed the Djinn plating food and cooking—Dean had to force himself to walk away before he started a war with them by barging in and demanding they stop touching his stove.

He followed Zara’s annoyingly regal voice to the hallway outside the bedrooms where Cas was apparently giving a tour to her and her bodyguard.

“How many people live here?” she asked as Dean walked over.

“Just the four of us,” Jack said. 

Oh, so now Jack was in on it too. He smiled, noticing Dean. “Dean! You should try these cookies.” He held up something that looked suspiciously like what the Djinn had been putting on plates in the kitchen.

So now they were bribing his family with food? Crossing his arms, Dean said, “I don’t know if you noticed, Zara, but we weren’t exactly expecting you or your, uh, attendants. Just how long are you planning to stay here?”

“At least a week,” she answered, shattering any hope that they might be gone by 6pm. “Cas was just showing us all these extra bedrooms where we can stay.”

Dean glared at Cas, who avoided his eyes and motioned to Zara to follow him down the hallway. “Um, over here is where we keep archival documents,” he said.

Jack made to follow and Dean grabbed his elbow. “What’s her deal?” he asked, watching Zara and her bodyguard follow Cas down the hallway. 

“What do you mean?” Jack asked, following his gaze.

“She barges in here with a dozen Djinn saying she’s engaged to Cas? Are they trying to infiltrate us? Can you tell if she’s evil?”

“She isn’t saying she’s engaged, she is engaged to Cas.” Jack finished off his cookie. “Cas told me, when he came back from Zara’s kingdom.”

“He told you?” And not me? he wanted to add. 

Maybe it was implied on his face because Jack looked mildly uncomfortable. “I can tell, she isn’t evil. She’s friendly.”

“What else did Cas say about her?” Dean asked, trying not to sound too interested or concerned. No need to panic; Cas had only gotten engaged to obtain the Tree of Life fruit. Not like Cas was actually into the Queen.

“Cas said she was very nice, but that he was in a rush and didn’t realize what was happening until it was too late. I don’t think he thought she would come after him.”

“Yeah, he looks real concerned,” Dean muttered, hearing Cas’ voice echo down the hallway along with Zara’s laughter. 

Wiping crumbs off his hands, Jack said, “I’m gonna get another cookie.”

 Stopping to grab his gun first, Dean followed Jack back to the kitchen. He swore, if the Djinn made a mess… But the room was empty and surprisingly clean for the amount of activity that had just been going on in there. 

They followed the sound of voices to the library where the tables had been pushed together and covered in platters and dishes. Dean stopped in the doorway, staring.

“Cool!” Jack exclaimed, going over to a plate stacked high with cookies.

“I told them we could have the feast in here,” Sam said at Dean’s elbow and Dean startled.

“You told them—” Fuming, he glared at the Djinn talking to Jack. “What’s the verdict? How many do I gotta kill to get Cas out of this engagement?”

“Put the gun away, you don’t have to kill anyone. According to a book I found, as long as Zara agrees to call the engagement off before the wedding begins, Cas isn’t tied to her.” He gestured to the book shelves. “You know, this isn’t such a bad thing, them being here. We've never actually gotten to talk to any Djinn before, and the Men of Letters don’t have much information on them.”

“Of course you’d be a nerd about this,” Dean complained. He nodded at where Zara was entering the room talking with Cas. “Don’t think she’s gonna give Cas up that easily. She already seems pretty attached.”

“I’m sure Cas will talk to her, let her know this is all a misunderstanding. In the meantime, try to be friendly, okay? We can’t risk getting the Djinn on our bad side.”

“We could take them,” Dean said and Sam gave him his patented bitch face. He huffed. “Fine.”

A clinking noise drew Dean’s attention to where Zara was standing at the head of the table, tapping a glass with a spoon. The room grew quiet and she announced, “I want to say thank you to the Winchesters and my betrothed Castiel for so graciously welcoming us into their home. I hope this meal marks the beginning of a wonderful alliance between us Djinn and the hunters. Now let us eat!”

Everyone moved to take a seat, Zara gesturing for Cas to sit at her right hand side. Dean pointedly took a spot close by to keep an eye on her. “I think you’ll enjoy this dish,” Zara said, passing him a bowl. “Cas tells me you’re the cook here.”

“Uh—” Dean took the bowl and ladled what looked like mashed potatoes on his plate. “When’d he have time to tell you that?”

Zara waved her hand. “We talked some when he came to my kingdom. He told me all about you and your brother and why you needed the Tree of Life’s fruit. I must thank you for saving the world quite a few times.”

“Uh, yeah. Sure.”

“You’re welcome,” Sam spoke up. 

Cas had been telling Zara about him? Inconsequential stuff, like that he cooked? Gathering himself, he said, “You know, we’ve encountered plenty Djinn before you.” He ignored the death stare Sam shot at him. “Had to kill plenty too. You wanna tell me how I’m supposed to trust you? What’s stopping you from poisoning all of us?”

Sam cleared his throat and the bodyguard standing behind Zara’s chair glowered at Dean. Dean glared back.

“Those Djinn were not part of my kingdom,” Zara said solemnly. “Our most sacred law is to never bring anyone harm. If I had found those Djinn you speak of, they would’ve been brought to a swift justice.” She glanced at Cas. “I’ve already gained the trust of Castiel, I'd hoped I had your trust as well.”

“You do,” Sam said quickly, side-eying Dean. “Dean’s just being, uh, cautious.”

Cas nodded, and across the table, Jack tore into his meal, seemingly not worried at all that the Djinn had prepared it. Sam gave Dean a pointed look and Dean rolled his eyes. So, Zara and her crew weren’t evil and apparently didn’t mean them any harm. Didn’t mean Dean was going to fall over himself trying to be friends. 

Ignoring Sam’s record-setting bitch face, he hesitantly started eating, finding to his annoyance that Zara was right. This food was pretty damn good.

He kept his mouth shut throughout the rest of dinner. Zara answered Sam’s questions about her kingdom, about the community the Djinn had created in the mountains, hidden from humans. According to her, it was “Heaven on Earth.”

Scowling, Dean drank from the goblet in front of him. Some kind of concoction he wasn’t sure he liked or not. Zara sure was laying it on thick. When she mentioned royal gardens, Dean saw the moment interest flared in Cas’ eyes. 

For fuck’s sake. Of course Zara loved to garden. Bet she had a whole bee farm, or whatever they called those. Anything to get in Cas’ pants, no doubt. 

He tried another sip from the goblet and grimaced. No, not good, he decided. Way too similar to the healthy crap Sam was always eating. Cas asked about the plants Zara had in her gardens, and Dean wondered why Cas had never planted a garden here at the bunker. He was always talking about the benefits of spending time in nature since, apparently, they didn’t get enough sunlight living in an underground bunker. Then again, Dean hadn’t ever really taken Cas’ talk about gardens and sustainability seriously. He categorized Cas’ interest in plants and bees as just another example of what a dork he was. A powerful angel of the Lord, but a dork all the same.

“I’m so happy to see you again,” Zara told Cas as a few of her attendants served what Dean guessed was some kind of Djinn desert, some weird pale pudding. She leaned forward and took one of Cas’ hands, and Dean clenched his own hands into fists under the table. 

Zara stroked her thumb over Cas’ knuckles. “Now that our tribe is at peace with our warring siblings to the North, we are looking to expand relations with other kinds. Humans, for instance, and angels. I think you can be a strong ally in making that happen.”

“I can try,” Cas said. He looked uncomfortable, staring at her holding his hand, and Dean remembered sitting across him in a brothel, trying to get him laid on possibly his last night on Earth. Good times. Even after years of being on Earth and talking to women, Cas never lost the deer in the headlights look when one of them showed interest in him. The sight gave Dean a strange satisfaction. Zara had no chance with Cas. 

She was going to give it her best shot, though. As if a feast wasn’t enough, after dinner, Zara presented Cas with gifts—ornate swords and knives with gilded handles, books detailing the Djinn history and folklore, robes and cloaks like the ones Zara and her entourage wore. Cas kept a polite smile on his face, but Dean saw the increasingly overwhelmed look in his eyes at the sheer amount of gifts.

Dean felt similarly overwhelmed and, somewhere along the line, he decided he’d had enough of Zara doing her damndest to impress Cas, touching his arm at any given chance. She had Sam and Jack under her spell too, it seemed, because neither of them were bothered by the ridiculous show she was putting on. 

Even when he left the library and shut the door to his room, voices and laughter carried down the hallway. He was glad everyone else was having a good time and completely ignoring the absurdity of this situation. Cas? Engaged? And to royalty? 

Seething, he sat on his bed and turned on the TV, trying to distract himself. He didn’t know how much time had passed before he realized he was watching an infomercial for a nonstick pan. 

A knock on his door sounded and he swore under his breath. “Go away, Sam,” he called. If he had to get another lecture about hospitality…

“It’s just me.”

Dean straightened, said, “Come in,” and Cas opened the door, holding a grocery bag. 

“I know, I know,” Dean said. “Don’t be rude to our guests, blah blah blah. I get it.”

“You were very rude to Zara,” Cas agreed, shutting the door behind him. “She’s only trying to be kind.”

Dean scoffed. “Yeah. Kind. That’s all.” Cas stared at him, cocking his head, and Dean rolled his eyes. Of fucking course Cas would be oblivious to Zara flirting with him. “You finally get through the fuckton of gifts she brought?”

Cas sighed. “It was too much. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with it all.”

“Don’t worry, I’m sure Sam will be up early organizing everything.” He nodded at the bag in Cas’ hand. “What’s that?”

“Oh, um,” Cas glanced down at it. “I thought you might want this.”

Dean took it from him and looked inside. The pie and beer he’d requested from the grocery store earlier that day. “Thanks,” he said. 

Cas stepped closer to the bed, then hesitated. Dean motioned for him to sit and Cas did so on the edge of the bed, away from Dean’s legs. He glanced at the TV. “We should have another movie night soon. We haven’t had one in a long time.”

“Yeah. Sure.” He was pretty sure Cas was just trying to appease him, though he didn’t know why. He was the one who’d been rude to Zara, Cas’ “betrothed.”

He opened a beer and watched Cas out of the corner of his eye, heart starting to quicken a little, as it always did when he was alone with him. It was ridiculous, because he and Cas were just friends. Obviously. He didn’t know why he had to remind himself so often. 

Cas twisted a loose thread on his trenchcoat sleeve. “Dean,” he started.

“Your girlfriend’s gonna start looking for you soon,” Dean interrupted. Cas lifted his head and squinted at him. “She sure is trying to impress you, going on and on about her kingdom.”

“It's a very beautiful place,” Cas said. “I wouldn’t mind visiting again. But I wouldn’t want to live there.” He studied him and Dean looked away, picked at lint on the comforter. “Dean, she may be trying to impress me, but I have no intention of marrying her, I never did. This whole situation is an unfortunate accident.” 

Dean cleared his throat. “Right. Yeah. Of course.” Obviously. I know that. Didn’t mean Zara fawning over Cas didn’t make his skin crawl. 

Cas looked like he wanted to say more, but he stood. “I suppose I should return to the library. Are you coming?” 

“Uh, yeah, in a bit,”

Cas left and Dean stared at the closed door, then down at his pie. It shouldn’t matter what Cas did, who he was interested in, who flirted with him. Not like Dean had any say in the matter, not like they were dating or something—which was not an option. Because Cas was just a friend. His best friend, but a friend all the same.

Sighing, he picked up his pie and beer before he left his room. He was going to need them if he was going to have to watch Zara and Cas interact. 

*** 

The next day, Zara and her entourage showed no signs of going home. Dean ran into several of them in the bathroom down the hall, two sitting in the kitchen talking to Jack, and four more in one of the archival rooms helping Sam—as Dean had suspected—catalogue Cas’ gifts.

Zara and Cas he found talking in the library, continuing a conversation from last night about agricultural practices in her kingdom. Apparently there was a lot to say on the topic. Last night, before going to bed, Zara had made some cheeky remark about waiting after the official wedding ceremony to consummate her and Cas’ marriage, and Dean had wanted to rip her head off. It only made things worse that apparently Cas wasn’t bothered by that remark, but of course not—Zara liked gardening and was cultured and had given him a million and one presents. There was no real reason to hate her, though that wouldn't stop Dean. 

He paused in the library’s doorway, before Cas and Zara could spot him, and caught the tail end of what Zara was saying,

“I know that you are distanced from Heaven, as evidenced by you living with hunters.” 

Dean bristled at the underlying meaning in her words—Cas had no place with him and Sam. They were just gross humans. 

Zara continued, “We have many in my kingdom who have been displaced from their homes, who are no longer a part of their own. I think you will find us to be an accepting community.”

“I’m sure I would,” Cas said, and Dean’s heart sunk. “But Heaven hasn’t been my home in a long time. This is my home now.”

Dean felt a little stunned at his words. Cas said it so emphatically. As if the bunker wasn’t just a place he’d ended up, but somewhere he chose to be, wanted to be.

Making a U-turn, he grabbed his keys and jacket and took Baby out for a drive. Unfortunately, even the rushing wind through the windows and the blaring music on the radio couldn’t distract him from his thoughts. 

Did Cas really think of the bunker as home? Here? With him and Sam and Jack? Well, of course, he told himself. Cas lived here, didn’t he? 

It was more than that, though, Dean knew. Cas had rebelled against Heaven to help them. Stuck by their sides for years. If this wasn’t his home, then where else?

And who did Zara think she was? She thought Cas needed a home, that she could give him one. As if they weren’t good enough for him. Well, Dean knew Cas deserved a lot better, but they got along pretty well. Had been through enough shit together, at least.

Zara had met Cas only once; she hadn’t stopped apocalypses and faced demons with him. Dean knew Cas better than anyone, or so he liked to think. Cas knew him better than anyone, at least. 

That’s what this is, he told himself. Why Zara annoyed him so much. He was just pissed that Zara thought she knew what was best for Cas. It didn’t matter that Cas seemed to get along well with her, that she had so much in common with him, that she wanted to marry him. Technically, if Cas wanted to marry her too, that wasn’t a problem either. 

He gripped the steering wheel tighter and glared out at the road. Not a problem.

When the sky was dark, he returned from his drive to a quiet bunker. Zara and her attendants were nowhere to be seen, and as he came down the stairs, Cas walked into the war room.

“Where were you?” he asked, stopping short.

Dean shrugged. “Just out for a drive.” He held out a plastic bag. “Here.”

Frowning, Cas took it from him and pulled out two packets of seeds. “Tomato seeds?” he asked, studying them. 

“Just thought, I don’t know. You’re always talking about nature and whatever. You could start a garden outside. If you want.”

Cas looked up at him, some unreadable emotion on his face. Dean almost asked if a garden was still in the works, or if Cas had started to envision the Djinn gardens. “Figure even if you don’t eat you should contribute to dinner,” he said instead. “Start growing food.”

Cas smiled and looked back at the seeds. “Thank you, Dean. That's very thoughtful of you.” 

Dean felt his face heat. Looking around, he asked, “Where’s her majesty?”

“She went to bed.”

“She try to seduce you?”

Cas cocked his head. “No. Why would she?”

“Uh, maybe because she’s trying to marry you.”

“Well, I’m not marrying her. I think she understands that.”

Dean raised an eyebrow. “You sure about that?”

“I’ve made my intentions clear, Dean.”

“Right,” Dean said, not convinced. Cas studied him, the familiar, peculiar squint to his eyes and Dean nearly squirmed. Turning, he said, “I’m going to bed.”

He passed Sam in the hallway near the bedrooms. “Hey,” he said, not stopping.

“Dean,” Sam called, and he turned. “You alright? Where were you all day?”

“Just wanted to get away from our million visitors. I’m fine.”

“Is, um… Is everything alright with you and Cas? He was wondering where you went.”

Dean crossed his arms. “We’re fine. I mean, he brought the Djinn here, but nothing we can do about it now.”

“Right. Um. Well, it’s just…” Sam looked like he was choosing his words carefully. “You’ve been acting… Well, acting kinda weird around Zara and Cas.” Dean stared at him. “Like you’re jealous or something.”

“I’m not fucking jealous! What the hell is there to be jealous about?”

Sam raised his hands. “I’m just telling you what I see.”

“Well, you’re fucking wrong.” Sam started to speak, but Dean ignored him and turned on his heel, continued to his room. “I’m not fucking jealous,” he muttered under his breath.

I’m not jealous, he repeated to himself the next day, watching Zara and Cas talk over breakfast. Or the next, which played out the same way: too many strangers wandering the hallways, Zara taking up all of Cas’ attention. Not that Dean needed Cas’ attention; he just didn’t see how Cas could be so oblivious to Zara’s intentions.

Unless Cas wasn’t oblivious and he was actually interested in Zara.

Absurd, Dean told himself. But the idea sat heavy in his stomach anyway. I’m not jealous, he told himself again. He was starting to sound less convincing. 

***

“Hey where’s Cas?”

Zara looked up from where she and Sam were poring over books in the library. Sam frowned, looking around. “I haven’t seen him yet today.”

“If you find him, tell him to join us,” Zara said, “Sam and I are going through the Men of Letters’ books on the Djinn. I’m afraid there are quite a few historical inaccuracies.”

“Right, sure.” Leaving the library, Dean headed back through the hallways, wondering where Cas could’ve gone. He hadn’t left Zara’s side much in the five days she’d been here. 

Maybe he’s finally gotten annoyed with her, he thought hopefully.

When his search through the bunker proved futile, Dean had a thought and headed outside. Sure enough, a few yards from the bunker door, next to a bag of potting soil and a tray of small green containers, Cas sat cross legged on the grass holding one of the seed packets Dean had bought for him.

“Hey,” Dean said and Cas looked up at him.

“Hello.” He began placing the seeds into the containers and Dean stood there awkwardly, watching. Maybe planting the seeds was a sign; maybe this meant Cas was planning to stay. Or maybe it meant Cas was going to take his tomato plants with him to Zara’s kingdom.

When Cas remained silent, Dean started turning away to leave him to his planting. “You can fill this tray with soil,” Cas spoke up, stopping him.

“Um, okay.” Sitting down next to him, Dean scooped soil out of the bag with a shovel and poured it carefully into the planting containers. Cas smoothed soil over the seeds he'd planted.

“Zara and Sam sure are getting along well,” Dean said after a few minutes of silence. “They’re going through the books in the library right now. Apparently there’s a lot of ‘inaccuracies’ in them.”

“Hmm.” There was a smudge of dirt on Cas’ chin that Dean was more than tempted to wipe off. Looking away, he poured more dirt in the containers before he was idiotic enough to try.

The weather was warm, a breeze rustling the leafy tree branches around them. Dean wished he could relax, but being in such close proximity to Cas was making his pulse race, per usual. Maybe even more so now, considering the way he’d been feeling lately. Not jealousy, he told himself. Just, concern. Friendly concern for Cas. 

Unwittingly, he thought of the way Zara looked at Cas, spoke to him, touched him, and he gripped the shovel tighter in his hand. Okay. Fine. Maybe Sam was sorta right. Maybe he was a little jealous. It didn’t mean anything though.

Realizing Cas had stopped planting seeds, he glanced sideways at him. Cas was letting soil sift through his fingers, a crease between his brows and a seriousness in his gaze that didn’t match the gentle way his fingers moved through the dirt. Dean started to wonder if Cas had come out here to get away from everyone, if something was on his mind.

“You and your plants there wanna get a room?” he asked and, fuck, that wasn’t what he wanted to say. Words were hard.

Cas glanced at him, then his recently planted seeds, and dropped the dirt he was holding. Apropos of nothing, he said, “Zara said she’ll call off the engagement if I really want.”

Dean’s initial surge of relief faded away when Cas kept glaring at the soil. Since he was pretty sure the tomato seeds hadn’t done anything to bother him, he asked, suddenly nervous, “Do you want to call it off?” 

“Yes, Dean. I don’t want to marry her.” Looking away, he brushed dirt from his hands.

“But?” Dean pressed. 

Cas sighed. “But she wants me to come back with her. Just for a visit. And I don’t know if I should.” He reached for a watering can at his side. “Zara and the other members of her kingdom were very welcoming when I first visited, and I’ve enjoyed taking to Zara during her stay here, but we have work to do. I can’t just leave.”

They did have work to do, but that was nothing new. Dean looked around at the start of Cas’ garden, at the slight rise of dirt a few yards away that marked the bunker underground. Maybe this was home for Cas, but it couldn’t compare to a kingdom, not how Zara described it. Begrudgingly, he thought of Cas and Zara's similar interests and her descriptions of her kingdom and how perfect it would be for Cas.

“Maybe you should visit,” he said, hating the way the words felt in his mouth. Cas frowned at him and he added, “Not saying you should marry Zara, but sounds like a cool place.” One part of his brain screamed at him to shut up shut up shut up, but the other told him this was the mature thing to do. Give Cas the freedom to make up his own mind. 

Cas nodded, not meeting his eyes. “I don’t know.” he said quietly. “But if you really think so...” 

“Yeah, of course,” Dean said, feeling a little sick. Ignoring the sensation, he pat Cas on the shoulder. “Whatever you want.” 

Take that, Sam. Could a jealous person do this? 

***

Encouraging Cas to leave with his Djinn friends may have been the mature thing to do, but that didn’t stop it from hurting like hell. Going back inside, Dean holed up into his room, not wanting to hear Zara’s gleeful excitement when Cas told her he was going back with her to her kingdom. He had a feeling Zara wasn’t going to be calling off the engagement anytime soon.

He didn’t emerge until that night, when sounds of conversation and activity had diminished outside his door. One thing he had to say for the Djinn, despite the number of them staying over, the bunker had never been cleaner and they’d all obeyed his command to stay out of the garage. Begrudgingly, he had to admit it wasn’t so bad having them over. If only Zara wasn’t actively trying to impress Cas. 

How many days had they been here? They’d probably be leaving soon. His stomach twisted at the thought, knowing they would take Cas with them.

Just for a visit, he told himself. He’ll be back.

He went into the library looking for a drink and found Zara and Cas poring over books side by side.

“Oh, hey,” he said, stopping in the doorway.

Cas looked up at him, a worried expression on his face. “Are you alright, Dean? You disappeared all day.”

Why does everyone keep asking me that? Going to a side table, he poured himself a drink. “Yeah. Just tired.”

“I’m sure it must be exhausting hosting so many visitors all week,” Zara said. You don’t know the half of it, Dean thought. “But don’t worry, we’ll be out of your hair tomorrow.”

Dean turned, nearly spilling his whiskey. “Wait, what?” 

Zara smiled at him. “We’re returning to my kingdom tomorrow.”

He thought he’d have a few more days… “Tomorrow?” he managed. 

“Yes. I’m afraid I can’t stay forever, my people need me back home. And I know they will be waiting to hear news of my betrothed.” She pat Cas’ hand and Cas turned red.

“Oh. Right,” Dean managed. “Okay.”

He tried to say something else, then turned and left the room in a rush. Tomorrow. Cas was gonna leave and Dean had told him he should go. 

The kitchen was empty and he sat at the table, stared at the glass in his hand. 

I’m being an idiot, he thought. Cas can do whatever he wants, he doesn’t have to stay here. Probably been looking for an out for ages. 

Needing to do something with his hands, he stood and grabbed ingredients from the cupboards. Without really thinking about it, he started making a pie, mixing the ingredients with more force than was necessary. 

“Fucking ridiculous,” he muttered under his breath, rolling out the pie dough. Tell Cas to go to a Djinn kingdom, that’s smart. With Zara of all people? He’s gonna come back officially married to her, talking about the royal gardens. Or just not come back at all.

“Fuck,” he muttered, throwing open the fridge door to grab the butter.

“What’re you doing?”

Dean wheeled around to see Sam standing in the doorway. “What’s it look like?” He slammed shut the fridge door. “Making a goddamn pie.”

“At…” Sam leaned forward to see the time on the microwave. “2:14am?”

“Is it a crime to make a pie at 2am? I had a craving.”

“What are you, pregnant?”

Dean flipped him off and Sam leaned on the doorway. “Don’t see why you’re in such a bad mood. You should be glad; Zara’s leaving tomorrow. You’ve been bitching all week about the ‘invasion’.”

Pausing in draping the pie crust dough over the filling, Dean stared at him. Glad? Was no one else seeing the problem here? “What, you going with them too? Packed your bags yet? Zara seems to have put you under her spell too.”

Sam frowned. “Dean, you don’t think Cas—“

“It doesn’t matter,” Dean said quickly. “He can do whatever he wants.”

“Yeah, but you got this all wrong.” Straightening from the doorway, Sam came to the island. “Cas isn’t going with the Djinn.”

“How do you know?”

“Because he isn’t! Why the hell would he?”

Oh, I don’t know, Dean thought. Maybe because Zara is fucking perfect for him and knows exactly what he wants and knows how to actually talk to him and not act like a goddamn idiot every time he’s in the room.  

Furiously, he crimped the edges of the pie crust and accidentally tore a hole. “Son of a bitch!”

“Okay...” Sam said, watching him. “I don’t know what the hell’s going on with you, but snap out of it. Cas isn’t going anywhere and maybe if you talked to him, you’d know that. Or even just stopped to think for a second.”

“Fuck off,” Dean said, and Sam threw up his hands.

“Fine,” he said, leaving the room. “But you’re freaking out over nothing.”

Dean glared at him and put his pie in the oven, sat back down. He’d done plenty of thinking and like it or not, it didn’t seem completely outside the realm of possibility that Cas would want to be with someone who understood him and appreciated him. Not that Dean didn’t understand or appreciate him, of course he did. Cas was his best friend and Cas had saved his life countless times and Cas was Cas—he was dorky and sarcastic and weird and considerate and too fucking earnest in a way that made Dean squirm while also being secretly jealous of how Cas could just say things and, and—

And fuck he wanted Cas to stay.

He didn’t know how long he stared at the table, but he startled when the timer beeped to announce his pie was done. He glanced at the oven, then looked around the empty room.

"I think I really like him," he said aloud.

 Taking the pie out of the oven, Dean grabbed plates and silverware and headed to the library, hardly knowing what he was doing, just hoping to find Cas. Thankfully, Cas was still there, sitting alone.

“Made pie,” Dean announced eloquently, setting everything down.

Cas looked up and shut the book he was reading. “Oh.”

Tossing his oven mitts to the side, Dean cut a slice and wordlessly slid the plate to Cas. Cas stared at him like he had two heads. “Figured you might want to try it,” he said. “See what the molecules taste like.” In truth, he was stalling. He didn’t know what to say to Cas, how to share his recent epiphany that yes, he was jealous, and yes, he did like his best friend, and yes, he was panicking a little.

Cas looked like he had a few questions, but he took the plate. “Thank you,” he said. 

“No problem.” Dean’s hands were sweating as he served himself his own slice and sat down across from Cas. He had been hungry before, but now his stomach clenched in anxiety, too many words rolling around in his head with no coherency. 

Cas picked up his fork and Dean figured the best way to start was with the truth. 

“Don’t go,” he blurted out.

Cas paused, fork poised midair. “What?”

Dean’s face flushed, but it was either speak now or regret it forever. “I know I said you should leave with Zara, but I didn’t mean it.”

Cas slowly lowered his fork, and it seemed speaking a few words broke down a wall in Dean’s mind because the rest came flooding out.

“I know I can be a real dick,” he said, “and I know I don’t know anything about gardening or agriculture, and I know I’ve been acting weird lately, but it’s because I really don’t want Zara to take you away from us. And maybe that’s selfish on my end—no, I know it is. But she doesn’t know you, really know you! And I do. I’ve known you forever and you’re my best friend and also maybe I wish we were more.” His face heated further, and he quickly added, “It’s alright if you don’t want more, that’s fine, just forget this conversation, but the main point is that I don’t want you to leave. I mean that. Please stay.”

Cas’ gaze had turned serious during Dean’s rambling, and Dean stopped there, heart pounding, mouth dry. He hadn’t expected to say all that, but he realized he meant what he’d said. Had meant all of it for a long time now, even if he’d been pretending not to. And maybe it was too late to tell Cas now. But he’d finally said it.

“Dean,” Cas said, and Dean braced himself for the I’m sorry, but... The, you suck and I’m leaving with Zara. Or even, you want more? That’s absurd. Why the hell would we ever be more than friends?

But what Cas said, instead, was, “I thought you wanted me to leave.”

Dean stared at him. And, yeah, he guessed he had told Cas to leave. But Cas should know by now that he was an idiot who usually said the wrong things. “I didn’t mean it,” he said. “I’ll go crazy if you leave, honest. I can’t…” He thought about how empty the bunker felt when Cas left for even a day, thought about how much it killed him to see Cas with Zara, and said, almost desperately, “I can’t do that. You leaving.”

Cas’ gaze had softened and his voice was quiet when he asked, “What do you mean by more?”

Dean’s heartbeat kicked up and he stared at his plate. Fuck. What did he mean? “I don’t know. Well, maybe I do. I just…” He took a deep breath and met Cas’ eyes. “I just want to be with you. Romantically, or whatever. More than just being friends.” He held Cas’ gaze even though his heart was pounding and a tiny voice in his brain screamed, abort mission, because it felt like such a relief to get the words out, albeit awkward and stilted.

Cas studied him and Dean’s pulse hammered in his chest as he waited for inevitable rejection. Instinct told him to backtrack, but now that he’d voiced everything, it seemed like torture to have to carry it all inside him again. He didn’t know how he’d done it for years. 

Then Cas spoke. “I want more too,” he said, like it was the easiest thing to say in the world. 

Dean stared at him. “You do?” he managed, and Cas nodded. 

“I was never going to leave, Dean. This,” he gestured around them. “This is my home. Here with you. I want to be with you too.”

“Oh,” Dean breathed. Cas never was going to leave. He started to feel a little ridiculous for his panicked pie baking, but a smile tugged at the corner of Cas’ mouth and Dean started smiling too. Cas wanted more.

“Can I… Can I kiss you?” he asked and Cas nodded. He started pushing his chair back, then Dean was standing and meeting him by his chair. 

Raising his hand, he touched Cas’ cheek. He was feeling a little dizzy from the remarkable change of events in so short a time, but the look in Cas’ eyes anchored him. This is what he wanted, had been wanting. 

Cas’ eyes fell shut when he leaned down to kiss him, and Dean smiled a little before pressing his lips to Cas’, finally.

His brain short circuited a little when Cas kissed him back, and it was a second before he could process the way Cas was pressing up close to him, hands gripping at his shirt. Slipping his arms around Cas’ waist, he pulled him flush, chest to chest. Cas made a small noise in the back of his throat and wrapped his arms around Dean’s neck. Dean’s head spun.

They kissed until Dean couldn’t catch his breath, until he felt weak at the knees. He let out a breathless laugh when they broke apart, and Cas smiled at him.

“I’ve wanted more for a long time,” he said. “I didn’t think you did too.”

“Yeah, well,” Dean kissed him again, pausing to say, “I guess I just never admitted it to myself.”

“And you realized this while making pie?” Cas asked, gesturing to the dish on the table. 

“Yeah,” Dean admitted, a little sheepishly. “But better late than never, right?”

“Right,” Cas said with a smile and kissed him.

Dean kissed him back, then took his hand, tugged him to the hallway. Cas followed easily, smiling, and Dean couldn’t resist kissing him again along the way. 

They eventually made it to Dean’s bedroom, but Cas paused when Dean grabbed the doorknob. “Hold on.”

Letting go of Dean’s hand, he went to the room where Zara was staying and knocked on her door. 

After a few moments, she opened it in a silk nightgown. “Why, hello, Castiel,” she said smiling. “What a surprise.”

“I need you to annul our engagement,” Cas said and Zara’s smile froze. Dean bit back a grin. “Now,” Cas added.

“I—Um. I thought we would discuss this further at a later time. Perhaps allow you more time to decide—”

“I’ve decided.” Cas motioned to Dean, and Zara leaned out to see him standing there. Dean waved. “My home is here.”

Zara blinked at them and Dean stepped forward. “What he means is,” he snaked his hand around Cas’ waist, “he’s taken.”

Cas grinned at him and Zara looked mildly stricken, staring back and forth between them. Then resignation spread over her features and she smiled a little. “I see.” Waving her hand, she said, “Well, then. Consider yourself free of our engagement.” 

“Thank you,” Cas said. 

“Of course. It’s the least I can do to repay your hospitality. And I won’t stand in the way of true love.” She started to shut her door, then paused, looking at Dean, “And since I seem to be single once again, please tell your brother he is welcome to visit my kingdom anytime.” With a wink, she shut her door, and Dean stared at it for a moment.

“I don’t wanna unpack all that.” He looked at Cas and smiled a little. “You sure you don’t wanna marry her?”

Cas rolled his eyes. “I’m sure.” And, as if to prove his point, he kissed Dean again. Then he pulled back to meet Dean's eyes. "You haven't been jealous all this time, have you?" 

"No," Dean said. Cas' eyes narrowed and Dean admitted, "Maybe a little." Okay, maybe a lot.

Tag List:

@becky-srs @xojo @marvelnaturalock @aelysianmuse @prayedtoyou @letsjustdieeveryone @good-things-do-happen-dean @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @theninthdutchessofhell @madronasky @famouspsychicpizzabandit @multifandomdisorder @arcticfox007 @mixtapecas @improvedpeanut @castiel-is-a-cat @harmonyhelms @thetrueliesofafangirl @dean-you-assbutt-cas-loves-you @theangelwiththewormstache @confusedisaster @welcome-to-crowleys-hellhole @queen-rowenas (tagging you bc your post about the djinn queen sparked this idea :))

#PBExchangeReunion #profoundnet #dean is a little out of touch with his feelings #dean gets jealous #first kiss #sam knows what's up #expectingtofly writes

[devinsfm]

joe keery. cis male. he/him.  ／  jack devin just pulled up blasting video killed the radio star by the buggles — that song is so them ! you know, for a twenty - four year old radio show host, i’ve heard they’re really impulsive, but that they make up for it by being so captivating. if i had to choose three things to describe them, i’d probably say obscure vintage horror comics, blurry photographs of mysterious figures in the woods, and vivid descriptions of spine - chilling tales  . here’s to hoping they don’t cause too much trouble ! ( sam, 23, est, she/her )

hey there, demons ! *ba tum tss* i’m sam and i never do this, but i really felt like it was time for a change, so i drew lots of inspiration from some of my favorite ocs and i love what i’ve come up with ! character info is under the cut and please feel free to message me if you would like to plot !

i. stats

𝔣𝔲𝔩𝔩 𝔫𝔞𝔪𝔢: jackson willard devin

𝔭𝔯𝔢𝔣𝔢𝔯𝔯𝔢𝔡 𝔫𝔞𝔪𝔢𝔰: jack, spooky guy, the night watchman 

𝔥𝔬𝔪𝔢𝔱𝔬𝔴𝔫: salem, massachusetts

𝔡𝔞𝔱𝔢 𝔬𝔣 𝔟𝔦𝔯𝔱𝔥: ocotber 31st, 1995

𝔷𝔬𝔡𝔦𝔞𝔠: scorpio

𝔬𝔯𝔦𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫: demisexual

𝔬𝔠𝔠𝔲𝔭𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫: host of the graveyard shift, a radio program airing every weeknight from 12am to 5am

𝔭𝔬𝔰. 𝔱𝔯𝔞𝔦𝔱𝔰: captivating, witty, resolute. 

𝔫𝔢𝔤. 𝔱𝔯𝔞𝔦𝔱𝔰: impulsive, gauche, naive.

ii. history

jackson willard “jack” devin was born on halloween day ( yes, really ) in salem massachusetts ( yes, really ). his mother stayed home with him as he was growing up while his father is a boston cop turned sheriff of the county and he’s an only child.

outside of the popular tourist spots, his hometown has a very close - knit, stuck in the 80s vibe. it’s the sort of place where everyone knows everyone for their entire lives because no one ever leaves and no one new ever moves in. phone and internet signals are nearly impossible to come by, so the local arcade and the video store still have quite a booming business in the year 2020. jack grew up in a not - so - typical small town suburban gothic environment, his dad’s income being just enough for them to get by every month.

he was an energetic kid who cycled through all sorts of interests, trying out everything from little league ( disaster ) to music lessons ( not as much of a disaster, but he wound up getting bored of it ). nothing seemed to really stick until he got his first horror comic : a vintage issue of tales from the crypt with tattered, yellowing pages. he was five years old and paid five cents for it at an elderly neighbor’s yard sale and from that moment on he was hooked. it started with the comics, but he quickly expanded his horizons to movies, books, and television in the genre of horror.

he got intro drawing and that was the only thing besides his newfound interest in horror that he could sit still for. at first he would just try to re - draw the panels in his comic books, but soon he was drawing anything and everything that caught his interest and he was getting good. he was being homeschooled by his mother at the time, but once friends and family and, well, everyone took notice of his skill, they were encouraging his parents to nurture his talent.

his parents fought about it. his dad didn’t see the value in his skill and wanted him to instead focus on academics, aspiring towards his son one day becoming a lawyer or a businessman or even following in his footsteps. jack never wanted that for himself. he was homeschooled by his mom up until then and she believed in him. it was with her blessing that he would go to a real school for the first time at the age of fourteen, starting off his freshman year at a high school that was a thirty minute train ride away in boston and catered exclusively to youth who demonstrated an exceptional talent in some area of the fine arts.

jack did well in school, but his grades probably would have been a lot better still if he didn’t start purposely acting out as his relationship with his dad got worse and worse. he started skipping classes, getting caught trespassing in cemeteries at 2am, and smoking a lot of weed. 

when it came time for college, jack planned to attend art school. he swears he did. he looked a few schools on the west coast to get away from his dad for a few years yikes and planned to apply, but on the deadline date he got so high that he forgot to submit his portfolios. yes, really.

he loaded up his van ( a turquiose monstrosity he painted to look like the mystery machine ) and headed out to california anyway after telling his parents that he would be attending UCLA. of course, they quickly found it that it was a lie and his dad was furious. the two got into a huge fight over the phone and things were said. the result is that jack and his father haven’t spoken to each other ever since. 

he did lots of odd jobs while he was on the road and basically lived in his van, which didn’t change right away when he decided to settle in LA, but he eventually got a job fetching coffee for the late night employees at a local radio station.

it was the typical, cliché story : the regular late night host called out of work at the last minute, there was no one else around and they were going to be on air in ten seconds. jack was thrown in front of the microphone and told to think fast !

he did, and the listeners loved him for it. whether it was his ramblings about horror movies or his thick boston accent or his reckless use of swear words on live radio, he turned out to be a massive hit. the successful night earned him a gig as an occasional substitute deejay, and with each broadcast he grew more and more popular, and about two years ago he was finally given his own program.

the graveyard shift is a radio program that airs every weeknight from 12am - 5am in the los angeles area and on apps such as iheartradio. jack hosts the show as his ( thinly veiled ) alter ego the night watchmen and discusses topics such as the paranormal, conspiracy theories, and all things horror. it’s one of the most popular programs of the time slot in the country.

it’s something that he never expected or picturing himself doing, but now he can’t imagine doing anything else. he’s become really passionate about revitalizing the field and bringing radio into the 21st century. he signed a HUGE contract with the studio when his show first started and now he’s a quite well known radio personality in the area and across the country.

iii. extras

huge stoner. high as fuck 90% of the time, and the other 10% of the time he’s probably still high, just not as fuck. 

well known for his on air antics. he’ll light a joint in the middle of his radio show, he’ll prank call a friend and broadcast it to the entire city, he’ll curse in every single sentence and skate by on the after hours excuse when he’s reprimanded for it. he’s so outlandish and bizarre and like nothing that’s ever been heard on the radio before, and it just draws people in.

he often seems shy in person, but it’s more like he’s just a little socially awkward, something which also shines through in occasional non - malicious but blunt remarks and general lack of regard for what people think of him. he really just...doesn’t care.

genuinely seems to believe it’s either halloween day and / or the year 1986 at any given moment as that’s about as recent as his pop culture references get. he’s never heard of the k*rdashians, he doesn’t know what the mcu is, and the phrase yeet means absolutely nothing to him. mention any of it to him and he’ll just stare blankly bc he honestly doesn’t have a clue.

HOWEVER, he did start the area 51 meme from last summer.  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

still draws. especially if he has to still for a stretch of time, then he’ll take out his latest sketchbook ( he goes through a lot of them ) and start doodling. he’s still quite good, mostly in his favored comic - esque style.

BIG CHAOTIC ENERGY and ZERO IMPULSE CONTROL

a chatterbox with friends but don’t be fooled...he’s been giving his own dad the silent treatment for almost seven ( 7 ) years now. it’s his preferred method of expressing anger towards someone because he isn’t really a fan of confrontation, but he’s maybe a liiiittle bit stubborn.

most of the time he’s a really easygoing person, a good friend and very loyal to the people he cares about. well - meaning, not the best at advice but he’s more likely to try and cheer a person up anyway. 

he has a pet pied ball python named the crypt keeper ( tkc for short ) who he sometimes just carries with him because he likes to just chill wrapped around jack’s hand and arm. 

iv. wanted connections

maternal or paternal cousins ( their grandparents probably live in boston or new england but otherwise anything goes for this )

close friends

friends

guests on his radio show 

fans / haters of his radio show

people who don’t like him / find him annoying

exes ( 1 - 2, can be on good or bad terms )

“casually dating” but it might get real complicated soon - allie james

( these are just ideas and i’m trash at coming up with stuff, so please don’t feel limited by what’s listed here. )

#excess:intro #drugs tw #i decided that i needed something new but i just ''created'' this ''new character'' instead #countdown until i mess up his name has officially begun

[cuddleslutloki]

older 30-something loki really getting off on letting young strong muscled college guys pump a load in his ass in anonymous hookups, then he meets thor, a 21 year old bro with a thick cock and even thicker arms who makes loki return to work from his lunch break with a slight limp and sticky thighs

so. here’s how i’m gonna play this.

loki teaches theoretical physics

he’s got like a PhD despite being so young bc he graduate hs early, graduated college early, then just kept going to school until he was at a point where he could do something with it all, but that didn’t leave much room for anything else in his life

doesn’t have much family that he cares about or cares about him

doesn’t think he’s lonely but wow he fucking is

so he’ll have occasional hookups that are Bad Ideas bc these are men who attend the university where he teaches and ofc he’s not doing anything wrong per se he’s not roping them into it, they’re never his students or even in his department but! doesn’t make it better!

then thor arrives in one of his classes, thor’s going for his master’s and the way he’s just been constantly in school reminds loki of himself. also thor is smart. thor is like… sweeping the room most of the time bc he thinks so damn quickly that out of every three times loki tries to trick thor it maybe works once after the first few weeks

loki is enamored and of course it’s all professional interest! thor is a very promising student! it’s fine!

until he wakes up after a very intense wet dream and he’s disappointed that it wasn’t about thor 

like, it would’ve been a better dream if it had been about thor

and he stops like. oh. that’s bad. that is inappropriate, even by his fast and loose moral standards

SO he thinks maybe it’ll just take time to work out of his system

he tries not to change his behavior bc thor genuinely is a great student, and oh, look, there’s paperwork on his desk where thor is applying to be his TA

perfect bc if he spends more time around thor he can get used to thor and he’ll find something unattractive about thor

Surely

but first hell is going to have to freeze right the fuck over because every second he spends with thor the more he’s realizing he really, really likes thor

so he’s like “hm. maybe. if i fuck him. i’ll get it out of my system. it’ll be fine”

not quite.

thor’s all for it, he’s entirely enamored with loki and loki barely has to hint before thor is firing on all cylinders and ready to go. their first time is w/ loki bent over his desk and thor grunting and growling in his ear, hastily jerking him off and loki cumming so hard he has to bite his hand to keep quiet

thor fills a condom and loki’s like =\ “hmmm don’t like that” but if they go bareback that requires getting tested which requires having a talk which requires admitting that he has feelings

not gonna happen

except he hates that thor’s cock is wrapped every time they fuck. so he subtly suggests that if thor were inclined to being tested maybe they could go bareback and thor is !!!!!! about it bc of course he is

and the entire time thor isn’t pushing for anything. he’s happy to let loki lead and set the pace, and in front of other people he’s always highly professional.

loki loves him.

then he buries that

then it rips into him and comes back even worse than before.

bc now he’s getting to know thor. they’re talking about thor’s future and what he wants out of life and loki knows he’s not old but goddamn thor is so young

but he’s so smart and so eager and they have late nights where loki has to grade tests and thor grades homework and they’re sitting in loki’s office and it’s quiet and soft

and loki wishes that they were in his apartment instead, sharing this moment over his dinner table

once they go bareback loki is fucking ruined. he wants thor all the time. he doesn’t understand how he can be so horny when he’s in his mid thirties but wow he’s always ready to go when thor’s around

one night they’re grading papers and they get distracted kissing, and he suggests they wrap up and go back to his place and thor shows his first hesitation like “are you sure you want me there?” bc on thor’s end he’s thought this was all casual, y'know

like loki wouldn’t want more bc he’s young and he’s a student, but here loki is saying “come home with me” and loki rolls his eyes and is like “i wouldn’t invite you if i didn’t. do you want to?” and loki doesn’t mean to sound as vulnerable as he is but thor lights up follows loki home

and they fuck fully naked for the first time, in a bed for the first time, and in the middle of everything loki just lets it slip that he loves thor and thor kisses him and kisses him and fucks him even harder and holds loki so close

it’s the most intimate thing loki’s ever experienced and afterward he’s terrified like. did he make a mistake? thor hasn’t said anything back but then thor just quietly says “i thought maybe it was one-sided, but i was going to take whatever you’d give me, loki”

and loki starts crying bc no one has ever valued him. sure they’ve valued what he can offer. they’ve valued his skills and his mind and his accomplishments but loki himself? no. that’s always been extra to carry everything else that could be used, but here’s this incredible, beautiful man who’s going to be a rockstar in their field and he’s saying he was just going to take whatever loki would give like even scraps were good enough

then they talk. really talk, and loki opens up more than he has, even though he’s been more open with thor than with anyone else he’s spoken to in the last ten years

the rest of the papers and tests never end up graded because they spend the rest of the night fucking and talking, with a quick midnight snack wherein thor makes omelettes out of loki’s leftovers and loki nearly proposes on the spot

this ran away from me

#thorki #thunderfrost #baylen fic #anon #college au

[lydsfm]

funny how i’ve had this bitch for a good year or so, began using her in january, Stopped, and have absolutely no recollection of the bg i made up for her since it’s likely in a dm i’ve lost track of SFSGFLDK so we’re starting over !! i’m gonna make this short and sweet bc dealing with three kids under the age of ten when i could’ve been wrapping this up a few hours ago took me O U T, not to mention i’m watching masterchef as i type this, but i’m kat, about to become an old hag come sunday bc i turn 22 and.. idk, i could use a glass of moscato right about now sdfjlkgdf enough about me bc you���ll see me bitching about something soon enough, so with that i’ll introduce you all to miss lydia hyunh ! stats will be up later hopefully, plots..... we’re going off the cuff with them until i cave and make one up so until then —

╰   * ✶ . ever notice lydia hyunh kinda looks like hillary trinh ? they’ve got 4.8m followers on instagram, but that’s no surprise. their instagram bio says they identify as cis female and go by she/her. they just turned twenty-one, right? word around la is they’re kinda vainglorious and nonchalant, but you couldn’t tell online. does it matter when your family’s net worth is $270m? ❪ kat, she/her, gmt-2:30 ❫

she comes from a new money family at the helm of a hong kong-based real estate development firm, but her geographical background is a tad more complex than that sijfg

not to mention her mother being a miss universe contestant-turned-supermodel who still walked the occasional runway after two kids à la the iconic 2010s victoria’s secret models, but anyways —

her dad’s a british national ( and started off as a financier, then switched to real estate, tHEN became a cfo of his own firm fdgsdklfdgfl ) as are she and her brother, so while he and his family were busy building up their company with many trips abroad, lydia, her brother and her mom hung back in london for the most part — though some of her summers were spent in hong kong or along the beaches of the mediterranean when she wasn’t embracing the countryside of her home country during term breaks

however, at age 10, she and the family moved to edinburgh so she could attend a more prestigious private school — and so they could be a bit closer to her brother who was spending time at the renowned st. andrew’s university 

.. basically, i need a sister in arms when it comes to bastardized accents, so have this british bitch with a scottish twinge FDSGJSHDGFSLK

speaking of her brother, they clearly have a sizeable age gap, so while they do love each other and all that, they aren’t necessarily close. he’s primed to be something of an heir and he’s more than cool with that, while lyds is more keen on taking her time to figure out what she wants to do with her life and her parents encourage it..... not to say he was ever pressured but, y’know

all the while, mama hyunh was busy appearing on.. idk, something like america’s next top model and project runway when she could — maybe even masterchef ?? GJSFGF — trying to work her schedule around lydia by taking her with her on sick days or during the summer months

so lydia had a taste of hollywood during her early teens with these trips, absolutely enamoured, fucking gobsmacked that her mom was in the industry bc with the way they lived back home it was as if she was merely privileged as hell

connection idea right there folks !

should note bc it feels weird to glaze over it even if it disrupts the flow, but lydia ?? LOVES her mom. so much. she’s a family girl in general, but she really does look up to her mom and appreciates the little things she does to help or impress her

we’re all about wholesome family relationships here, js SLKFDGJSLFD but anyways

she keeps up this lifestyle of studying in edinburgh, travelling wherever the fuck her parents wish to take her and getting ( almost ) whatever she wants

bc if there’s one thing either of her parents put to her, it was to know her limits and to at least recognize her privilege, even if they knew she was a little too spoiled in her own way to be thoroughly humbled. sounds fake but i always thought of them as traditional hard workers who want their kids to be the same, so 😔

and with that, upon graduating and attending uni in glasgow the following fall, lydia kinda.. separated herself from some aspects of her wealth, wanting to be a normal student with some obvious luxuries bc. she can’t help herself fsdgljgdfs

especially when you have a damn model for a mom and you’re Kinda known to be her kid

and yknow what, it worked out for the most part. ofc she couldn’t hide her roots so people knew this annoying brat came from money, but they weren’t complaining bc at least it meant they had some GREAT parties bc of some loans she’d give out for the sake of having a good time herself

long story short, she loved uni, still does, but she loves the breaks even more as she’s been consistently visiting hollywood since she was 18. mama hyunh became more involved in being a tv personality now that both kids were out of the nest and her husband kept himself occupied with work ( when he couldn’t see her, which ofc is routine as he recently moved up to be ceo ), so she spends much of her time in beverly hills 

so much so that lyds’ summers were spent reconnecting with her mom, and having a wild time on the side too gfsdkjgfd

this year, however, her dad decided to open an office in l.a. to be more present with his wife. and to capitalize on the market

and after hearing that.. something in lydia Snapped. ksldfgjkldf like she v quickly decided to take a break from school and stay here for a bit

which some would find weird bc really ? NOW ? when your parents are around ?? but eh....... using the excuse of “ family bonding ” to really take advantage of whatever ounce of star power she has here is fine by her LFSKDGJSDFG

probably lives with her two cousins to save her ass from being dragged

PERSONALITY AND OTHER SHIT

according to my little blurb on my p much Dead indie: “ ( upper middle class-turned ) trust fund baby who tries to downplay her privilege but usually fails; adventurous and charming, she's a soft player who likes being pursued so long as she calls the shots ”

so uh.. that hasn’t changed much GFLKSDFL

i love the ( closet ) sad little rich girl and all those classic tropes as much as the next person, but lydia happens to be one of the most unbothered chicks you’ll probably ever meet FGJKSDG

vulnerability ?? don’t know her ! she’s just here for a good time and doesn’t know anything But !

laidback af, not to mention i never saw her as particularly defensive of her status and such, and i’m sure her uni life reflected that all by itself

the fact that she’s had it relatively easy in the sense of no real trauma or family issues helps, who knows fdsjglk

doesn't mean she won't lay into you if the time calls for it, especially if you have a god complex or something. she’s of the mindset, “ you do you and i’ll do me, but act like a fool and i’ll happily remind you of it for the rest of your days, ” so it's safe to say that someone could bring out the bitch that lurks beneath if they're not careful SGFJDKLGF

can she be selfish and indulgent ?? .. yes, but does she carry herself as such ? ………. also yes, bUT not by much, which makes a difference ! 

LKSFDGLF jk, but she is restrained in how she displays these tendencies ( for the most part ) or else she probably would’ve gotten her ass handed to her back in uni. thank god she’s well-mannered enough

wild child ! gets around ! don’t think i need to elaborate aside from the fact that she’d rather NOT get an sti or wind up in the er over dumb shit, so there’s a sense of caution with it all

basically, she can be materialistic as hell and takes advantage of the shit she has while she has it, but she’s practical enough to know her limits or to just. know better

idfk, i feel like this makes zero sense bc i’m so drained, that this seems like it could be the setup for a m*ry s*e which..... ew, and that i’m missing a lot of extras but i’m DEAD so we’ll leave it there fdklgjsg

#╳┊: — we packin’ diamond pistols ! •「 ooc ! 」 #opuintro #watch me completely overhaul this bc it's so messy and Lame DFGJFKSDL

[huangels]

➧ 85 questions

tagged by: @jencto ty my love! ♡

rules: answer these 85 statements about yourself, then tag 20 people @ohdaddy-nct @dcyoungs @rxnjuns @reunjun @angelita-gordita @taeybear @taezhu @lycheechann and all who wants to do!! (only if u want too bbs)

↳ Last…?

1. drink ─ hot burning coffee that i almost spilled while driving to class bc it’s pouring outside

2. phone call ─ laura (my friend who just graduated high school !!)

3. text message ─ my mom (telling me to drive safe in the rain uwu) 

4. song you listened to ─ jump by shinee (the album = a whole ass bop) 

5. time you cried ─ oof i cry for the lamest and dumbest reasons but last night i was looking at nct fanart and i saw a cute ass noren one where jeno was dressed in a big moomin costume and wished renjun a good day w/ a ballon and it was all hella cute and shit lemme find it i rb on my personal (THIS ONE) it was,, so cute,, i actually cried,, 

↳ Ever…?

6. dated someone twice ─ oof i rarely date let alone the same person twice lmao yikes

7. kissed someone and regretted it ─ i kissed this huge asshole in high school for a dare and he wouldn’t stop saying we had sex for a whole ass week,, this is why i dont date

8. been cheated on ─ nope

9. lost someone special ─ yeah but that’s the circle of life i guess :(

10. been depressed ─ oof did you mean: my four years of high school 

11. gotten drunk and thrown up ─ uhh psh no i don’t drink underaged,,, mhm

12. fave colors ─ WARM TONES!! nudes (skin colors), maroon/burgendy (just like a dark bloody red), rose gold/dusty pink (the light shade of pink but not pastel), black (just bc), royal blue (the only cool toned color i like idhhdh) 

↳ In the last year have you…

15. made new friends ─ yO making new friends is my middle name (i love making new friends !!) 

16. fallen out of love ─ i’ve never BEEN in love... 

17. laughed until you cried ─ if it’s after midnight, anything will make me laugh and cry (also i laugh at everything so yes)

18. found out someone was talking about you ─ lmao hell yeah high school drama everyone was out for me bc i look like a bitch and people are so quick to judge ://

19. met someone who changed you ─ umm not really everyone’s pretty chill. my roommate, who’s also like my best friend, is a huge party addict so she brings me to many parties, so i guess i’m more out there ? idk moving on 

20. found out who your friends are ─ literally once i graduated high school and went to college, all of the snakes just left and now i’m surrounded by my real friends uwu :^] why tf is everything related to high school i don't wanna remember that

21. kissed someone on your facebook friends list ─ bruh i only have facebook so i can get extra rewards on iphone games ksjkdj 

↳ General

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl ─ refer to #21

23. do you have any pets ─ i, myself, don’t have one bc i live in a dorm, but back at home, i have a doggo. she’s a thai ridgeback and her name is 巧克力 (qiao ke li = chocolate) and i miss her vv much :’))

24. do you want to change your name ─ for the most part no, i like my name, but when people call me ‘ran-you’ or something of the sort, i question why i live in america

25. what did you do for your last birthday ─ i traveled around china alone (well with my two friends back in china) without my parents for the first time bc i was an Adult™ now

26. what time did you wake up today ─ i was supposed to wake up at 8am but i didn't roll out of bed until 8:30am but hey, i made it to my 9am class 10 minutes early somehow

27. what were you doing at midnight last night ─ looking at nct fanart on tumblr and wishing that i coud draw/paint like that :’))

28. what is something you can’t wait for ─ my trip to spain!! i’m traveling to spain for 2 weeks with my friend at the end of june to july and i’m so excited bc i haven’t hung out w/ him in forever

30. what are you listening to right now ─ i’m in my accounting 2 class rn,,, so my professor lecturing about debits and credits (yes i know i should be paying attention but i’m an independent learner so i prefer reading the textbook and taking notes,, i’m just here bc attendance is graded)

31. have you ever talked to a person named tom ─ my old high school teacher whose first lecture was about corn and how it’s in EVERYTHING that is mass- produced today,,, well his full name is actually thomas

32. something that’s getting on your nerves ─ it was raining as i was walking to class and even though i had an umbrella, somehow my pants are still all drenched and this lecture room is SO DAMN COLD and i’m shivering someone save ME

33. most visited website ─ my school website lol

34. hair colour ─ jet black but in the sun it turns reddish brown ?

35. long or short hair ─ super long, it reaches my waist lol 

36. do you have a crush on someone ─ does renjun count? jk kinda ?? but not really bc,, idk dating doesn’t really act as a major objective for me right now

37. what do you like about yourself ─ friendliness and outgoingness ?

38. want any piercings? ─ oof i already have a lot but i want more yes (i have 3 on both my lobes, 1 on my both cartilages, and on my right ear i have a snug ? is that what it’s called idk) lowkey highkey i wanna pierce my nose but we’ll see

39. blood type ─ o 

40. nicknames ─ all nicknames i’ve ever gotten: ren, renu (my baby cousin calls me that bc she can barely pronounce words), fish..., nyu, rennie, r, human fish, + many puns on my name

41. relationship status ─ single and tired

42. zodiac ─ scorpio 

43. pronouns ─ she/her

44. fave tv shows ─ the office, black mirror, we bare bears, law and order,  futurama, stranger things, bob’s burgers, bate’s motel, american horror story (i love the duality between cartoons and fucked up shows dsdkjh) 

45. tattoos ─ i want ones !! (prob small in hidden places) but um maybe once i graduate undergrad at least 

46. right or left handed ─ right handed

47. ever had surgery ─ no - kinda? i have a scar on my eyelid bc when i was like 3-4 y/o, i was playing hide and seek w/ my uncle and cousin in china and i was running around and i turned quickly around a counter the same height as me and the corner of the counter cut open my eyelid,, this is kinda tmi but i was so stunned bc blood was running literally out of my eye so i didn’t even cry, i just stood there like ‘oh...that’s a lot of blood...’ i went to the ER to get it stitched up but idk if that counts as surgery :p

48. piercings ─ refer to #38 

49. sport ─ currently i play volleyball and basketball for club, but played a lot in high school too

50. vacation ─ anywhere i love traveling !! also east asian,, mostly just china i miss my friends and family :’))

51. trainers ─ ?? uhh as in shoes? or the gym? idk,,

↳ More general

52. eating ─ as in what i ate today? if so, a bagel and a boiled egg for breakfast

53. drinking ─ coffee that’s now cold rip

54. i’m about to watch ─ uhh my professor continue talking about accounting and economics 

55. waiting for ─ this class to end so i can eat lunch 

56. want ─ a change of pants bc i’M WET AND COLD 

57. get married ─ i sure hope so

58. career ─ i want to start and own a fashion brand/company/line (i’m double majoring in international business and trade + leadership management right now)

↳ Which is better

59. hugs or kisses ─ both i just want affection ;((

60. lips or eyes ─ these are hard to pick but eyes !

61. shorter or taller ─ taller even though i’m pretty tall as it is 

62. older or younger ─ older or the same age ? (rip sorry renjun) 

63. nice arms or stomach ─ arms? i need you to be able to put me in a chokehold and KO me (not in a kinky way,,, maybe,,,)

64. hookup or relationship ─ relationship duh ?

65. troublemaker or hesitant ─ team too-lazy-to-be-either

↳ Have you ever

66. kissed a stranger ─ uhh prob not

67. drank hard liquor ─ no officer i don’t drink underaged mhm

68. lost glasses ─ i literally have like 6 pairs of glasses that i keep thinking i’ve lost but then find it again 

69. turned someone down ─ oof yeah sorry 

70. sex on first date ─ no i have standards 

71. broken someone’s heart ─ i hope not ! at least not intentionally  

72. had your heart broken ─ prob once or twice 

73. been arrested ─ in my good christian household?! (i’m not even christian tf)

74. cried when someone died ─ well of course i have a heart

75. fallen for a friend ─ all my friends are hot as fuck no lie

↳ Do you believe in…?

76. yourself ─ always :D !!

77. miracles ─ eh,,

78. love at first sight ─ maybe not LOVE but something similar

79. santa claus ─ i-is he not real... (i’m kidding dbksj)

80. kiss on a first date ─ sure why not

81. angels ─ renjun is a walking angel on earth

↳ Other

82. best friend’s name ─ vincent, alyssa (my two fave people) 

83. eye colour ─ dark poop brown

84. fave movie ─ i watch too many to have 1 favorite but for the sake of this tag, i’ll say coraline 

85. fave actor ─ i have a big gay crush on dilraba dilmurat also tom holland 

el fin

#tags #personal #this is such a long post sorry mobile users ifhdihs #uhh ignore typos i'm in class #honestly this is so much info about me wow #i'm not very interesting or funny tho so #yall prov just gonna scroll pass its OK lol #YALL DILRABA IS SO FUCKING HOT AND CUTE I LOVE HER #google her if yall don't know smh

[djdsagalagweg123123123]

This is my Overwatch self-insert/oc, zhen!

Full name: Nian-Zhen Qin (秦念真, Qín Niàn Zhèn)

→ her first name means ‘a belief in truthfulness’ and her last name is the same last name as the emperor who ordered the great wall of china to be built. it’s meant to be kinda ironic and foreshadow her future

Nicknames: Zhen, Jen/Zen (English name)

Codename: Milkman (in her own organization), Zhen (Overwatch) → ngl she was tempted to change it bc no one took it seriously at first → Zhen is pronounced using the ‘xi’ sound (like in xion)

Age: 32 (biologically a year younger than genji and a year older than mei)

Zodiac sign: Aries

Gender: Female

Sexual orientation: Pansexual

Ethnicity: Chinese

Languages: several, most notably English and Mandarin Chinese

Species: Human

Place of birth: Beijing, China

●Physical●

Body type: fucking buff. kinda short? ~163cm

Birthmarks/freckles/moles/scars: Freckles along the bridge of her nose from sun exposure. No notable scars.

Tattoos/piercings: She gets her first tattoo in honor of the passing of a friend, the coordinates of their place of death which also eventually becomes the location of a safehouse that contains a Doomsday plan of sorts.

Voice: She has a non-distinct voice with no accent that conveys her emotions rather well. I think I would want Trina Nishimura to voice her, who also does the voices for Kyoka (Boku No Hero) and Mikasa (Attack on Titan).

●Abilities●

Milk: Zhen always has a few bottles of ‘milk.’ While not actually milk, this healing formula is often referred to as such due to its milky white color. It’s a healing potion filled with nutrients and vitamins. Effects vary with potency. Comes in several different flavors: original, almond, soy, strawberry, banana, and chocolate. Contains no lactose.

110% - a condensed formula that is more potent than the original. can heal large amounts, fortify health, and replace normal rations. caffeinated and addictive. reserved for emergencies or extremely long missions. to avoid side effect like mood swings, irritability, anxiety, restlessness, drink at most one pint in a day with water.

100% - the original formula. contains all the nutrients needed for a full day of activity. meant to replace soldier rations. can heal large amounts, promote strength building. usually contains caffeine.

75% - give as rations to rebels and civilians immediately post-disaster. diluted to prevent side-effects in case of overdose. can replace meals completely up to a week or supplement meals for a month. non-addictive.

25% - given to children and immunocompromised. fortified with extra vitamins, antibiotics and minerals. can strengthen immune system. meant to replace mother’s milk for infants, any age can drink. non-addictive.

Milkshake and Malt: When heading into enemy territory, whether it’s rescuing civilians or teammates trapped behind lines, Zhen always goes in equipped with a blaster and a collapsible shield she nicknamed Milkshake and Malt, respectively. She tries to avoid using these. → Yes, everything she does has some weird dairy-related element. No, she doesn’t like milk that much. She will only drink milk with her cereal. She likes ice cream though, but she likes gelato more.

Strength, Speed, and Agility: Zhen is incredibly strong and agile. She’s got super buff arms and legs because she needs to be able to get places fast on foot, while carrying her milk to distribute or others to safety.

First Aid: Zhen is trained in first aid, carries a kit with her, and can patch others up if no field doctor is available. For certain missions, she adjusts her kit based on the mission. On distribution runs, she’ll carry antiseptic ointments and bandages, while on rescue missions into active warzones, she’ll carry a biotic field generator.

Driving: Zhen is a superb driver. She was an official hero, her ult would be running you over with a transportation truck. She skilled in evacuations and figuring out how to squeeze double the people in a normal sized car. (the trick is to get an open air trunk and put someone back there). Zhen can also pilot planes, boats, and semi-trucks.

 ●Bio●

tl;dr ver: Zhen is from a rich family but rebelled and started her own organization. She joins Overwatch in the place of a close friend who passed away before recall. 

Birth and Raising (Birth - 10 years old)

Nian-Zhen Qin was born in Beijing, China as the heiress to QinCorp, the world’s largest shipping and distribution company that also has strongholds in several other industries, like factory production, medicine, and weapons. From a young age, she was groomed to become a powerhouse. She had access to the best education money could provide- private tutors, textbooks, hands-on immersive experiences unavailable to most people. At ten years old, she was considered a genius. But her emotional growth was horribly stunted. Because of this pampering, she was horribly sheltered and superficial.

Zhen travelled the world in style and became a young social media figure, with millions of followers swooning over her lavish life. Movie premiers, fashion shows, award ceremonies - she’s been attending those since she was just a young child. She starred in movies as the precocious child or cute little sister. She had her own children’s fashion line and modeled it when it first came out. All of her baby pictures are online somewhere.

The Shimadas (12-18 years old)

Zhen’s mother asked her to meet her in Hanamura - there was some people she wanted her to meet. Zhen assumed it would be another one of her important business partners. By now, she had met all sorts of important people, so she assumed this would be the same thing. She will shake his hand, act well-spoken, go to dinner, and be on her best behavior. And afterwards, someone will comment on how well-behaved she was. It was the same routine every time. Young Zhen was surprised when she was introduced to Hanzo and Genji Shimada.

This was the first time Zhen spent time with anyone near her own age. Hanzo and Genji were the first true friends she had. Zhen continued to visit Genji and Hanzo, solidifying their relationship.

Meeting Genji and Hanzo was the start of a rebellious portion of her life. She decided to spent the rest of her adolescence living in Japan to spend more time with the two, but was allowed only under the condition that she give up her other creative endeavors and focused on her studies. Zhen disappeared from the public’s eye when she was 13.

Genji, Hanzo, and Zhen had an odd relationship that became strained as they grew up. As Hanzo took on more responsibilities, he spent less time with them. As Zhen’s studies intensified, however, she would always make time for Genji. And Genji the Playboy, busy at clubs and girls, would always make Zhen his number one priority.

Genji and Zhen both ran away at first when the responsibilities that come with their lavish lifestyles appeared on the horizon. Topics like marriage, succession, and training came up. Genji would continue to avoid them, throwing himself in his playboy lifestyle, but Zhen accepted it. She was very well aware that their time together would end soon, since she would eventually begin seriously studying to become the next head of her family business. When Zhen became attending meetings as her mother’s successor to QinCorp, she lost contact with Genji.

Re-meeting Genji (Age 23)

The next few years of her life were fast yet unmemorable. Unable to contact the person who had become her closest friend, Zhen found herself in a sort of depression, unable to find happiness in the things she previously enjoyed. And so she threw herself into her work. Zhen was making business deals, growing company stock, pleasing investors, and all of the sort. She focused on proving herself time and time again that she would be a suitable successor.

All that mattered to her was upkeeping her family legacy. Zhen knew her place in the world, her place in QinCorp. A gala was thrown to celebrate her 23rd birthday and to officially welcome into the company’s board of directors. At the end of the night, she received a message that someone wanted to see her on the balcony - it was urgent.

--> “Seeing that shock of green hair shook her to her core. It was a quiet encounter; their eyes meeting for the first time in five years. Genji looked as youthful as ever. Zhen felt she aged twice as quickly compared to him. Same hair, same mischievous look in his eyes, same goddamn smirk that showed up whenever he picked up that dumb girl at the club. Ugh, what did he see in her? Why does he go after every big set of boobs? And never mine? They spent the rest of the night together. I missed you. I missed you too. I miss being with you. So did I. Such words went unspoken that night. They didn’t need to be said out loud. Genji wanted to spend the morning after with her. Zhen couldn’t - she had meetings all throughout the day. Family responsibility comes first after all. By the time, she returned, he was gone. Zhen would have agreed to spend every morning with him if he just asked. “

Regular correspondence between the two began, but a month later, Genji passed away. Zhen dropped everything to fly out to attend his funeral. Finding out Hanzo was the one who killed him surprised her, to say the least. Hanzo was missing and Zhen, distraught, didn’t bother to seek him out.

Realizing how corrupt the system is and leaving (Age 23-24)

She was angry, she was sad, she didn’t know what to do. She dealt with her feelings the only way she knew how - by ignoring them and going to work.

Zhen entered as the Vice-President of the Board of Directors. She, by choice, remained in the shadow’s of the company, working from behind the scenes and justified it to the directors by saying she had outgrown her love for the camera. It was because she didn’t care for it anymore.

A year into her term, there was a workers’ strike at one of QinCorp’s newest factories. Apparently, the factory head couldn’t negotiate terms with the head of the striker and Zhen decided to take action herself. She flew to the factory only to find that the factory head didn’t actually attempt a discussion. They fired the protesting workers and hired a new set from the town over.

This discrepancy wasn’t the only thing that shocked Zhen. One of the reasons the workers were protesting was because of the factory’s effects on the environment. The factory had only been operating for about six months, but the river was completely murky and the sky was hidden in smog.

When Zhen brought these issues to the board, she immediately put forth a new policy that would shut down all their factories and move all funds to research and development of cleaner methods of manufacture until newer technology could be implemented. The board threatened to boot her from the company because of her extreme views.

Word of what Zhen was trying to do spread. Every QinCorp worker went on strike to support her. Before, they were forced to suffer quietly because they needed that job to feed themselves and their families. But, now they knew that someone high up was on their side. It was a worldwide revolution, and Zhen was the symbol.

Everyday, the directors grew more and more anxious. Everyday, more money was lost, more people were joining the revolution, and more pressure was put on them to follow Zhen’s command. Every day the factories are shut down, the stock markets takes a blow and several countries fall into recession. Markets and governments were being destabilized. International trade was halted.

Blackwatch was called in to remove the de facto icon, and Genji was sent to eliminate her.

But he couldn’t bring himself do it. He infiltrated her home and warned of the plot against her. He told her he agreed with what she was doing to protect the people and that he would help her escape if she swore to never return to her home or to her company. Zhen agreed. She knew her disappearance from the world would not be the end of the revolution she had ignited. She asked who he was and if they would ever meet again. Genji told her that who he was was unimportant, and that they might meet again when the time is right.

So with nothing but the clothes on her back and a handful of bills, she left her father’s house, his company, and his legacy, never to return. The next day’s headlines spoke of a fire in the Qin mansion. Nian-Zhen Qin, former actress, model, and revolutionary company director, passed away that night. A body was never recovered and a funeral was held later that week.

Having left the public eye when she was 14 made it easy for Zhen to blend in. She left Beijing and travelled to Guangzhou where several underground groups against QinCorp were taking hold. Zhen had caught wind of one of QinCorp’s lab entering testphase with a miracle drug and seeked out help to break in and steal the formula. She knew that QinCorp was going to sell the drug to whatever organization or government could pay the most money for it. Rumor has it was that the starting bid was going to be 400 billion Chinese yuan (60 billion USD). Zhen wanted to steal the formula, produce it with her own means, and distribute it for free worldwide.

Building MODhome (26-31)

Zhen spent two years integrating herself into her new community. She went by Zhen Lee to avoid recognition. From the shadows of the underground, she watch news of the riots and strikes disappear from international news, but knew that in reality, they were still very much alive. Normally, Overwatch would step it to mediate such discussion, but with the ratification of the Petras Act, that was no longer possible. Although factories opened up again, dialogue on how to increase workers’ rights and protections began. At least that was what the QinCorp reported to the public. Zhen knew better than to believe whatever lies that company spewed.

With the miracle finishing testing phase, Zhen and a team consisting of herself, a former Overwatch agent that lent themself to the cause, and a number of rebels, broke in. It was a quiet in and out operation. No alarms were set off, no evidence of their activity was left behind.

Within the year, they secured a production and distribution operation that sent bottles upon bottles of a modified version of the stole drug to rebel forces all over the world. The drug had several names that varied with region - Renegade’s water, Rebel’s Calpico, Yakult but not really...some were catchier than others. Zhen referred to it as Milk.

Over the next five years, Zhen expanded their activities by providing support to not only rebels against QinCorp, but also to areas affected by war, natural disaster, and climate change. It was during this time in her life when she gained most of her current practical skill set: driving, self-defense, and first aid. It was also a period of exponential personal growth. She has formed real connections with people and felt like what she was doing was important. She enjoyed going on field missions, making personal deliveries and find meaning in the connections she made.

This organization was eventually named MODop, short for mitigation of disaster operations. Many refer to it as simply MOD.

Recall (31)

Zhen became extremely close to the group of people that helped her steal the formula - particularly the former Overwatch agent - and would frequently go on missions together. One day, the pair was sent on a rescue mission. The objective was to lead a group of agents to retrieve citizens from a small town’s bomb shelter. It was supposed to take place during a four hour window that was predicted to have no bomb activity - no planes were supposed to fly in, nothing was planted on the ground, it would ideally take less time than the window allowed.

Her ally was outside when the bombs that weren’t supposed to be dropped were dropped. Zhen was in the shelter, organizing people to get them in transportation trucks when she saw a bright flash and felt the earth shaking. She knew immediately what had happened and realized that they couldn’t be more vulnerable. The planes aimed for the trucks of civilians outside. She did her best to hurriedly usher everyone not on a truck back inside, but she couldn’t do anything to help her partner and the rest of her team.

The mission failed. Zhen was the only agent that survived. The organization mourned the loss of civilian lives, several agents, and a founding member. She mourned the loss of her team and her closest friend and ally. She’s failed missions before, but there was always a bright side and something to learn. But what could she learn from this failure? What could have she done differently to prevent the death of her friend? She took a temporary leave from missions.

Zhen inherited her fallen comrades’ items. She still wonders why it was her name in the will and not anyone else’s, Why her and not family or older friends? It wasn’t much, just a box of their old clothes, some books, and a communicator from their Overwatch days. She kept them in a corner of her room, refusing to go through them and accept her partner’s death.

When word of the Recall reached via her fallen comrade’s communicator, she decided she would seek out and join Overwatch in their place. It was the least she could do after all they did for her.

●Notable Relationships●

Genji: Childhood friend, past lover

Hanzo: Childhood friend, but drifted apart

Mercy: Met in a refugee camp, worked together to transport victims of war. Close friends and allies

Unnamed former overwatch agent: Ally, co-founded MOD

Mei: Zhen met Mei when she was lecturing at a university Zhen was visiting. It was girl crush at first sight for Zhen. Mei at the time was seven years older than her, so Zhen didn’t do much to pursue it. They talked a lot about papers, science, and tv shows! They were good friends despite the age gap! The last time Zhen saw Mei was at the airport, saying goodbye to Mei as she left for Watchpoint: Antarctica. 

●Notes●

Pokemon AU: Miltank, Bisharp, Chansey

Myth AU: Witch/Seelie

Zhen’s father was a scientist who married Zhen’s mother because he actually loved her. He emphasized how important a good education is Zhen during the years of her life when he was present. He divorced Zhen’s mother when Zhen was 8 and didn’t try to get custody of Zhen because he knew she would be happier with her mother who could reliably provide.

Zhen has two bachelors degrees (environmental science, business).

#mine #photo #overwatch oc #self insert

[cheonjaem-blog]

wanna one as types of boyfriends

yoon jisung:

the walking meme. everything he does is fucking hilarious. you literally have 2000 photos of him on your phone which could be edited into potential memes. there’s never a sad/boring day in your life. he’s actually always super excited about everything and you always sometimes question his mental age but you still think it’s really cute. always makes stupid puns and jokes to make you laugh (that sometimes even results to self degradation). all that makes him happy is seeing you smile, so he makes that his daily goal. likes to send you weird pictures of him using different filters on snapchat that you obviously screenshot. he’s super funny and your whole family loves him, especially the kids. “auntie when are you getting married to uncle jisung?” “soon” “um jisung wtf stop lying to the kids” “i never said i was lying”

ha sungwoon:

the tea sipper. he has the dirt on everyone, and i mean everyone. knows what’s going on in your life, your neighbor’s life, and your second cousin’s uncle’s grandfather’s life. your dates consist of gossiping with the neighborhood aunties every week at the book club he organized. wants to know how your day is and knows you so well that he can tell when your feeling down. sings to make you feel better, and if that doesn’t make you smile, he’ll probably pull out the big guns and start dancing to girl’s day something. doesn’t mind embarrassing himself if it makes you happy :’). doesn’t like it when you call him cute bc he’s “manly not cute”. tries to fight other people when they talk shit about you. talks a lot!!! like when you’re trying to catch some z’s, all he does is talk about how your neighbor’s husband is cheating on her with her sister??? “omg don’t tell anyone but jisoo’s husband is cheating on her with her own sister” “wtf how do you know?? did you stalk her husband again??” “no way, i was throwing away the trash and i saw them?? coincidentally??”

hwang minhyun:

the perfectionist. a little ocd and always needs everything to be super clean and organized. he told you that he had perfect attendance in school and always had straight a’s. his skin is perfect, his visuals are perfect, and his voice is perfect. sometimes you feel like he’s too good for you, but then you remember how much of an awkward loser he is in real life. texts you the most romantic things, but can’t say it in person to you. you like to tease him a lot for being an awkward antisocial person. very easily embarrassed person. not a big pda person. blushes a lot. doesn’t know how to convey his feelings into words or actions, but it’s okay bc you know he’s trying hard. he looks like a cold tsundere but sike he’s a soft mochi on the inside. smiles a lot more now bc “you make me happy i guess”. 

ong seongwoo:

the prankster. he loves messing around with you and pissing you off. one time he put blue dye into your body wash and you came out of the shower looking like a smurf. you guys end up having prank wars and once you even super glued his feet into his shoes. when he’s not thinking of ingenious plans to prank you, he’s actually a really sweet boyfriend. sometimes he takes you out on spontaneous dates to that fancy restaurant across town to make up an excuse to see you wear a beautiful dress. but he loves taking you on midnight rides. like he’ll drive you in silence as you enjoy the night sky and talk to you about random things and let you rant about your inner thoughts. “stop staring at me ong!! focus on the road” “you’re just too beautiful. you distracted me”

kim jaehwan:

the musician. he confessed to you in broad daylight while playing the guitar and singing a song written for you. you guys were sitting on a bench in the city and he randomly whips out his guitar and starts singing. a crowd gathers around you eventually, and they cheer when you accept his confession. he likes to write songs in the middle of the night, so you’ll probably wake up at 3 AM and hear him playing random chords on the piano and writing lyrics in the dark. he writes songs thinking about you and likes to sing to you when you have trouble sleeping. also super extra!! likes to boast about things that he can’t do like karate and playing soccer. he told you that he used to play soccer in middle school, but when you actually took him out to play he said “yeah i played soccer. i played fifa” “ugh i hate you so much right now”

kang daniel:

the gamer. he’s a huge fucking loser, and he loves playing league and overwatch and basically every game ever. tried to teach you how to play league once but you never understood anything, so he ended up carrying the team and winning. spends 95% of his time indoors, but he also likes to cuddle with you when he’s gaming. makes you sit on his lap while he wraps his arms around you and rests his chin on your head when he plays. likes taking you to comicon or any other nerdy convention. but it’s endearing to see him so excited about cosplayers. “cosplay with me next year” “lol how about a no”

park jihoon:

the prince. on top of his handsome looks and dancing skills, he was also born with a silver spoon in his mouth. buys you everything you’ve ever wanted and then some. but you’re not interested in materialism ok yes you are but you’re more interested in him. so he doesn’t really understand love?? like he’s always been loved by his parents but he tries his hardest to convey his feelings for you without extravagant gifts. like this is the first time someone told him that they didn’t want a new car and he doesn’t understand why you don’t want a mercedes benz but it’s your loss?? he takes you to nice dates at super expensive high end restaurants while you assure him that getting a take-away pizza is always fine too. wears gucci and givenchy and saint laurent and tries to buy you clothes from there too but one dress is worth more than your life??? he likes to sleep on your shoulder while you stroke his hair. really cute relationship full of $$$. if you need a sugar daddy you know who to call. “you want a new car?” “wtf no i want a new boyfriend” “>:((((”  

park woojin:

the shy turned wild one. yeah he was really shy when you first met but now he wildin. you tried taking him to a family party once but he was getting too into his dancing and ended up grinding the floor. what happened to the shy bean that couldn’t look you in the eye?? sometimes he’s still really shy around people he just met, and he kind of attaches himself to you. but dancing really makes him let everything go, and he tries to teach you choreographies to your favorite songs. taught you how to dance to red velvet and exo and rap to okey dokey. dates consists of dance lessons and chilling at home watching smtm together. bet milk tea on who’s going to make it to the finals. “yo it’s gonna be nucksal” “oh hell no i’m betting on hangzoo” “wow it’s only bc you like zico & dean more smh i thought you loved me”

bae jinyoung:

the nerd that turned hot. you known him since elementary school but boy did he glow up in high school. the last thing you remember was him being that smart nerd that never talked, but now he has a whole army of girls chasing after him. outside appearance may have changed but he’s still a nerd. dates consists of chilling at home and watching the latest episode of the anime y’all like while cuddling. takes you to animecon where you cringe at the weebs but where he enjoys every moment of it. likes taking you to manga and anime stores. dreams of going to japan with you. also likes to buy you cute couple charms for your phone. “i bought you the touka charm bc you’re the touka to my kaneki” “you’re such a fucking weeb lmao but sasaki is better”

lee daehwi:

the foreign swagger. yeah he lived in america for 4 years, that’s why he’s here man. just kidding, he’s a super adorable boyfriend that sometimes mixes up his languages when he’s flustered. super caring and always frets over you. nags you a lot when you get sick. “i told you not to go outside without a jacket!” but really good music tastes. makes different spotify playlists for you to listen to when you’re sad or tryna to get turnt. likes shopping dates!! he is your personal fashion designer and buys cute dresses when he thinks you look cute in them. “i thought this color suited you really well, so i bought it!” “um but it says it’s $300″ “oops?”

lai guanlin:

the athlete. he likes every sport but he’s super obsessed with basketball dude. like he’ll take you out to the nearest basketball court to shoot with him even if you can’t make a shot for your life. dw he’ll teach you the proper shooting form and how to dribble. you’ll end up having lots of cute basketball dates and afterward he’ll probably take you out for ice cream. likes to rest his head in your lap as he practices his shooting form laying down. lots of after-practice cuddles. “ew guanlin you’re so sweaty. get off of me” “no i like staying with you like this”

#wanna one #wanna one scenarios #wanna one as #yoon jisung #ha sungwoon #hwang minhyun #ong seongwoo #kang daniel #kim jaehwan #park jihoon #park woojin #bae jinyoung #lee daehwi #lai guanlin #kpop #kpop scenarios #boyfriend au