#he would definitely still look at her as an enemy for basically stopping his revenge.

[shadowedvales]

so… in the additional media of stranger things (specifically the comics i’m mentioning), it was initially brenner’s idea/plan to kill off the other test subjects because they weren’t performing as well as eleven was. it was his best solution because that way, all the resources, time, and money could instead be placed only to her. and i just…. sure henry is a fine character and the massacre makes a lot of sense to me, but i think i am once again gonna change up my canon to actually fit this potential narrative instead.

i genuinely think the comic canon of the lab and brenner is far more intriguing than the show. everything with 9/9.5, ricky, and francine. eleven being the only one who grew up completely in the lab. those other kids were either volunteers, well into their teens, or had some semblance of a home life. eleven was the only one practically moulded from the womb. and they all had such a range of interesting powers. i firmly stand with the idea that jane is the only one who can contact the void.

brenner’s entire point of view on the lab subjects changed the second he found out terry was pregnant. he discovered he could steal this baby and make her his own. there would be no convincing the child because it’s all she would have ever known. because of this, i would not put it past a man like brenner to kill the other subjects for the sake of the “greater good” in this case, eleven.

eleven’s gifts just continue thriving beyond his wildest expectations. brenner would never dare assume that having moulded her from the womb, she would still be able to grow into her own person, her own mind, and one day be able to see him for exactly who he was.

back before season four aired, it was obvious there were other test subjects because jane was 011. so there were at least ten kids before her. but i always liked the idea/assumed that she was the last experiment because she was the most successful. that they didn’t need anyone after her because she was fulfilling everything they set out for her to do. with flying colours.

i just think the whole rainbow room idea, pitting the kids against each other thing… been there, done that. boring and predictable. i think at this point my portrayal of her time in hawkins lab really stems from the complete isolation she endured. where having the rainbow room, although eleven was obviously the most isolated out of the kids, brings that sense of community and sister/brotherhood. albeit extremely warped and toxic. knowing that she wasn’t alone in that experience just. doesn’t sit well with me. i think it’s important to note that she was alone, physically and mentally. which is why kali is also so important to her growth. i thought a lot of the flashbacks of her time in the lab during season four was really boring, repetitive, and just very predictable. although peter becoming vecna was a surprise to me, and was a nice little twist, the idea of her having an ally on the inside was really interesting.

maybe they did get as far as they do in canon, peter ballad was telling the truth about everything, about some of the workers there being prisoners like him, and he really wanted to get her out and to safety. but before they can escape through the pipes, they’re caught. peter is shot on the spot, and eleven is put into the isolation room for a few days as punishment. in this timeline, henry would be vecna, but henry would not be peter ballad.

when eleven turned seven, and was already showing extreme promise, where the other children were average at best, brenner had the eight children killed. kali had already escaped. this was the main cause for peter to gain eleven’s trust and try to get her out. because if brenner could murder his “children” in cold blood, there’s no way eleven was safe even in spite of her power.

when eleven is allowed out of the isolation room, her testing becomes more rigorous in attempt to distance and make her forget about what she attempted to do with peter. brenner begins gaslighting her, saying that there was never a peter, that she must have been dreaming. eleven does ask “papa” about “mama”, given peter told her of the day terry broke in the lab, but brenner is convincing enough to make eleven believe it was all in her head. say she is around eight years old, meaning the same timeline of season fours canon flashbacks.

i still do wanna keep the henry creel canon, and keep him as 001. brenner didn’t have him killed alongside the other test subjects, because who knows, one day he could become an even better asset than 011. brenner definitely wants to be able to control henry, but keeps the chip in him because, for the moment, doesn’t know how. killing him would be too big of a loss.

when eleven is ten years old, henry’s concealed powers break free and he manages to get the chip out himself, and unleashes hell onto hawkins lab. he almost kills brenner by snapping his bones, but eleven manages to stop him. her extreme abilities are unleashed, and she sends henry to the upside down. she does fall into a coma due to the extremity of the situation, but she does not forget what happened. brenner believes she’s the perfect weapon as she stepped in to save him without a second thought, was able to defeat henry, and opened a door to something he never thought possible. eleven is rewarded for her efforts. although she remembers the entire battle / confrontation, her memories regarding the portal are very hazy.

brenner decides not to focus on the portal straight away, instead gets her training harder and harder to see what else she can accomplish. also loved the idea of brenner sending her into the void to “look for him” so that will definitely be kept.

by the time she escapes and season one begins, her knowledge of the upside down is basically what we see in canon. because she passed out the moment after she sent henry away, she was once again gaslighted into believing she merely threw him through the glass and killed him. for two years she believed this, until making contact with the demogorgan, and those memories return completely.

due to her saving brenner’s life, (it was pure instinct. she happened to be there. saw her “papa” hurt and knew she had to make him better.) brenner constantly thanks her. but in a very condescending way. tells her: “you saved me so i can continue saving you.” aka, harness your abilities and see what else i can achieve from you. despite the fact that she saved his life, these words and phrases make her feel indebted to him. that she owes him something further.

i don't realistically see her thriving with her speech improvement until she's well into her twenties at least. her slowed development, sensory and social deprivation causes a serious delay in language. surrounded by other children she would have overheard conversations, some would have spoken to her. her conveniently forgetting her upbringing pre the battle with henry just isn't good enough for me anymore. it makes more sense for her to have been raised alone.

it also helps indicate why she gravitated towards the boys when they found her in the woods. they would have been the first people her age she ever remembered seeing. as far as she knew, during the lab there was no one like her. everyone was much older, they were adults-- although she stayed with benny, i'm not sure if she would have stuck around very long. where she followed the boys home without thought.

also it's important to note that after time, jane does understand that peter ballad was a real person, and was truly the first person (aside from terry) who wanted the best for her. when she remembers him, knows that brenner was lying, she deals with immense guilt regarding his death. he was shot right in front of her eyes, because he was trying to help her. this is another catalyst as to why after season two, jane never refers to brenner as papa. she does not give him that sort of credit.

#study‚ in my dreams it's all real and my heart has so much to reveal. #THINKING THOUGHTS. i have had this concept in mind for a while but i THINK i’ve fleshed it out properly now. #will write this up properly one day (never). #although henry offering eleven a place at his side wouldn’t be canon #he would definitely still look at her as an enemy for basically stopping his revenge. #AND the whole speech between he and jane never sat right with me. #saying brenner made him what he was / that it wasnt his fault etc. Like. No? henry was a sociopath. he killed his family. #brenner didn’t do anything to make him who he is. so jane always saw him for exactly what he was #and there’s absolutely no sympathy there. #and then regarding my season four canon as her regaining her powers by remembering the massacre/the fight. i am changing that to her #regaining her powers by simply confronting her past. understanding what she went through. finding ways to cope with it physically and #mentally. getting coping mechanisms from her therapist. seeking help. not needing to know WHY this happened to her (because there is not. #and will never be a reason.) but finding ways to accept it and move on. how to move on from eleven and become janessa ives. #also just because in this case henry doesn’t massacre a bunch of kids? It doesn’t make him any less evil. in this instance i am following #the idea that some of the workers were prisoners there in hawkins lab. and henry killed a bunch of the workers. so would definitely have #killed some innocent people. #just because i am separating peter from henry. does NOT mean i am excusing anything from henry/vecna. #in this case they are two completely different people. although i highkey wanna use jcb as peter because he just did the role SO WELL and #was SO BELIEVABLE i’m not sure about it yet. because i don’t want anyone to get the impression that i’m making excuses for henry. #BUT YES. #this be the new canon. <3 #idc brenner is such a good fuckin villain he’s disgusting but so intriguing.

[blog-of-reaction]

ANTMAN AND THE WASP: QUANTUMANIA SPOILERS

More unasked for thoughts on this movie. (Except this time I remember to put it on my thoughts about movie/shows blog instead of my main)

I wish the og? Kang had survived. Like, I’m sure the other Kang’s are cool, but I really liked him as the villain. Also, with Kang being the big and of phase five. (Is it phase 4 or 5? I honestly don’t know.) with him being the big bad though, I can’t help but feel like killing off the Kang that literally all of the other Kang’s were so scared of they banished him to the quantum realm was a mistake. Like, they already (most likely) successfully took down him, how are other Kang’s who aren’t as scary going to feel like much of a threat?

Especially since there will be multiple. Like, I realize the Kang we’ve seen so far could be an outlier, but I’m not so sure they wont be able to be divided against each other. (Then again, them being divided against each other would most likely cause just as much if not more damage then them working together, given the whole monologue at the end of Loki.)

Also, Cassie was great and I love her.

I’m not necessarily an expert on Modok but I liked the what they did with him. Also, the part where Scott asked “Shouldn’t it be Modofk?” was perfect. Ive literally asked myself the same thing ever since he showed up in EMH.

I really liked the family dynamic they had in the movie.

Hope and Scott’s relationship actually had like, some real substance to it this time. Granted, it is very little but their romance is still much more believable than in the previous movies. (Which I mean the bar could not be lower there and it still feels a bit like “what?” but not as much as in the previous movies. Their relationship is mostly like, subtly implied and definitely supported and kind of lifted up via the overall family dynamic everyone had, but it still felt a bit forced at the end. I am slowly coming around to it maybe though? Like, I no longer passively dislike it. Instead I passively accept it.

The side characters were great, fun to see, and I loved them. I actually teared up when torture laser beam for a head guy was killed.

There were a few brilliant scenes that I especially enjoyed or found funny.

First off, like, just put yourself in Scott Lang’s shoes for a minute. All sorts of things weird unbelievable stuff has happened in your life and now you’re in the quantum realm and you lost sight of your daughter after being captured by these strange quantum realm people. And then when he finally sees her, he sees this teenage girl with what looks like blood dripping down her chin and she just cheerily says

“Drink the ooze!”

And then the camera cuts away. Hilarious.

“Those buildings are alive?!”

“What, are yours dead?” said with genuine concern. Beautiful.

The surprise actor for Chidi and pretty much everything when it came to his telepathy.

“How many holes do you?”

*excitedly after being shot a lot* “I HAVE HOLES” and then turning into a vacuum cleaner and just straight up going eldritch something on these guys

Also, Darren’s death. My response to that entire conversation was basically to laugh and ask myself what the fuck? I’m pretty sure Darren said some of that stuff just to mess with Scott but I’m not sure.

I want revenge and im going to kill you and your daughter! “You’re being a dick.” “Yeah but I don’t know what else to do.” “…just stop” great idea, thanks. And immediately doing a 180 and helping your previous sworn enemies.

Also, Kang was great, and a good villain and I was actually like, a bit scared of him. I mean, I still havent seen Wakanda Forever (I know and I hate that about me too) so I can’t comment on Namor and while Killmonger was a good MCU villain Kang is a good villain. And like, those are two very different things. So that was refreshing to see.

Back to Kang I don’t know how the rest of this phase will play out. Like, how will the, for lack of a better term, council of Kang, react and what will they do? Besides maybe destroying the multiverse according to prime Kang. (Speaking of, the Kang in this is just like, a younger version then the one that Sylvie killed in Loki right? It’s never outright stated but it seems pretty clear.)

#antman spoilers #antman and the wasp spoilers #antman and the wasp quantamania spoilers #quantumania spoilers #mcu spoilers #spoilers

[starshipsofstarlord]

Sheer | Kai Parker

Warnings; SMUT, ANGST, and FLUFF, mentions of death, mourning, loss, mentions of murder, trauma, swearing, unprotected sex,

A/N; sorta made up a whole storyline for this imagine, may be a teeny bit different and may have gotten a little carried away, please enjoy loves

It would not uphold, the weather held a grudge against you as you trudged through the pouring rain, cursing you for thinking that you would be safe on your lonesome.

Instead of a monster, the world wished for you to drown in its falling rivers, making you shiver down to the bone. It was too cold, but you had to go there, it was a ritual.

Since the death of your boyfriend, Aaron, who was killed by Damon, someone you thought to be a friend, you felt broken.

You had tried everything to bring him back, but without the power of a witch, it was deemed impossible, and Bonnie refused to help you, claiming that it was necromancy, and far from her beliefs.

It angered you, how everybody would dismiss the lost lives that Damon took. He got a free pass, he didn’t even regret his own invalid actions.

He was a monster, and you hated him. If you couldn’t bring Aaron back, then you would instead kill his murderer. That would not only give you a sense of revenge, but also make the world a safer place. There would be one less vampire making people’s lives a misery.

“Hi there.” You stopped in your tracks, the voice sending shivers down your spine. Whilst it sounded like a man, in reality it could be anything.

The skin of a human was a disguise the majority of the time, a bloodsucker or a wolf coping inside the exterior, thirsting to break free from the walls of bones and flesh.

“Kai.” He was not exactly human, he was a witch, the one thing that you needed. You had met him through Elena, who was luckily also angered by Damon’s actions, Aaron had been her friend.

And just like that, he had died. But she hid her feelings well, pretending all was fine because she was in love with the gruelling monster that you wished to execute.

However, even though you wanted to bring back your lost beloved, the time that had passed made your mind being up the idea of moving on.

The first person that sprung into your imagination was Kai Parker, the new sociopath in town. He was new, unaware of the traumatising past experience that lingered in your heart, and not to mention, his specimen was one of beauty.

Those grey eyes, ever so curious could bore straight into your soul, and you’d gladly let him mangle it, you no longer had a use for it anyway.

“Why are you out here y/n/n?” He asked with a tilt of his head that had your heart beating profusely.

Everyone knew of his effect on you, but they told you to dismiss it. It was cruel, that they’d rather have you mourning the loss of your partner than to move on with another.

To you, it didn’t matter if he were supposed to be the enemy, you no longer wanted to fight their battles. All you desired was to be in love, with somebody that felt the same.

And whilst you doubted that Kai knew how to feel such a strong emotion, some attention wasn’t the worst thing in the world. As a matter of fact, it worked well as a distraction, it made you almost forget the grudge that you held against the eldest Salvatore.

Almost.

“It’s nothing.” You whisked the direction of the conversation away from your deceased boyfriend, not wanting to talk about him to anyone, let alone Malachai Parker.

Even thinking of Aaron caused a void to open in the middle of your chest, it was unbelievably painful. You thought some people, such as Bonnie would understand, rather than think the loss as a regular occurrence.

To put it simply, the entire ordeal was completely fucked up, and you felt much more guilty for biting your lip at the expression that Kai pulled; his eyebrows raised, and his fingers carefully running down the side of his own jaw.

Oh god, his fingers. There were so many things that you could imagine him doing with those, and from the way he waved them on a greeting, he knew that he teased the thought too.

“Basically...” he began, rolling his grey eyes with what he liked to call modesty, and you classified as boredom, “you’re stuck out in the rain, and if I’m not mistaken, you live halfway across town.”

“Stalker much?” You sneered, crossing your arms across your chest, which only made his gaze wander down, and hold their movements for a dragged out moment. “What are you looking at?” You exasperatedly sighed, only understanding when you followed his peering.

He was focused on your chest, that through your white shirt, appeared almost bare. The lace of your bra was giving him a clear frontal, and so you adjusted your arms, so that they covered more and whatever they had pushed up to peak his intrigue.

“Why am I not surprised?” Shaking your wet hair, which was pointless considering that it was still raining, you realised that you felt the creeping of the cold.

You had been oblivious to it, thinking that it was a side guest to your tears, almost a consequence. But you were no longer tearful, mostly angry at the killer that ruined your future and acted as though it were no big deal.

“I thought you were supposed to be at college.” Kai quirked his brow, proud of the fact that he knew that. However you shook your head, and watched as he removed his jacket, clasping it around your shoulders, shielding you somewhat from the weather.

It appeared as no big deal to him, but it was to you, sociopaths weren’t famous for being kind and charitable. They always had agendas, their agendas, well they were obviously sociopathic.

But from the glazing of the witch’s eyes, you only saw a lost man. He was misinterpreted by all that he knew, they treated him like an outsider, alienated him as though he were a monster, and validly that was why he was seen as one.

“No.” You whispered, confused as to why you were so complied to correct the man. “My boyfriend was killed, I don’t want to go back there, it’s clear why.”

You attempted to give him a small smile, but it came out as a pained grimace. Just the thought had your mood drained, even more so since there was no route to resurrect him.

“Oh yeah, I heard about that.” He didn’t shiver in the rain, instead he seemed comfortable simply standing there, conversing with you in the rainfall. “Damon did it, right?”

Licking your lips, you hesitantly nodded, ashamed of the fact that you had once called the vampire a friend. From the start, you were always wary of him, but eventually you managed to become close to him. And then he ruined your chance of happiness, literally sucking the life out of it.

“What a dick.” Kai was blunt with his annotation, but you couldn’t deny that he was right about them. “Sorry for your loss and all that blah blah. We should get somewhere warm though, you can tell me more.”

It was a strange feeling, you felt pulled to the male, it was as though he was one side of a magnet, and you were another. And so you accepted his invitation, and followed him, breathing in the scent of his black coat. It was much sweeter than you had expected.

🏹

His so called home was an apartment, that you no doubt expected he had convinced someone with his magic to give him rent free. Or he killed them, either or you guessed.

But the thought of death itself was one that you weren’t too keen on thinking about, not now. Instead, you’d rather enjoy the company of someone that didn’t shame you for hating and desiring to kill the one and only Damon Salvatore.

Most of your friends didn’t take you seriously, they just barked laughter, not believing, nor willing to think that you could ever commit such a sentence. But they didn’t share your pain, if they did, you were sure that they’d understand.

Matt got it, he resented the vampire and a lot of the other blood suckers too. And your certainly couldn’t blame him, he had lost his sister, and there was no reason behind her change. It had all just been a game, a gruesome one at that.

Kai lightly removed his jacket from your shoulders, hanging it on a hook to dry. He almost appeared embarrassed, having you in such a private space.

But you didn’t want him to endure such a mindset as that. Instead you smiled, brushing your damp hair out of your face, grasping his hands. They were cold, and that made you frown. No one ever cared what he had gone through, instead they just wanted to rid the world of him.

Even his family had dismissed him, all because he had been different, and treating him as such had definitely had a mind mingling affect on him. It repented an unstoppable rage inside of him, one that ended in dead children and imprisonment.

“Thankyou.” The small example of affection had Kai tilt his head awkwardly and pull his hands away from your own. He wasn’t used to people even being polite towards him, let alone openly sharing contact with him.

You should have been scared of him. Or at least somewhat repulsed, but you weren’t, and it was a first for him. Most around him taunted him with blame, or pointed out his obvious flaws.

And so he ducked his chin downwards into his chest, taking a couple of steps back, mumbling something about retrieving you a dry shirt.

As you waited for him, you peeled off the sheer layer, dropping the ball of wet material upon the ground. Your bra had soaked into your skin, but you left that on out of modesty.

When Kai returned, his mouth gaped open, eyes widening at the half undressed sight of you. But he tried to avert your gaze, blushing at your lack of attire.

“It’s okay.” You jested to him , reaching out for the clean shirt that he had brought for you. “You can look, it’s not like I’m naked.”

“Yet.” He smirked as he allowed his stare to freely roam. His voice had been small, but you had heard it as clear as day. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be thinking like that, you’re in mourning and I get that you wouldn’t want to, yknow.”

His hand gestured between the pair of you , prompting what he was talking about. But maybe he was wrong, after all, it had been a while since you had any physical intimacy, and you’d be a fool to deny that there was chemistry between you and a particular witch.

“Don’t be sorry.” You put the dry shirt aside, walking closer to the brunette. “I am in mourning, but I’m going to get my revenge, and a distraction sure wouldn’t hurt.”

“And here I thought that you were just a pretty face.” Kai’s hand drifted to the side of your face, pulling you closer so that your lips were almost brushing. His breath ghosted over your own intermingling the fumes of lust and intrigue. “But it seems that there is a darkness in that mind of yours, I’m impressed with your plans to say the least.”

“I haven’t even told you any of them yet.” Your hand drifted under the band of his jeans, plucking teasingly at the denim, licking your teeth as you made strong eye contact with him.

“Tell me after.” He ordered, grasping your hips, and clashing your bodies together. Your lips worked hungrily against each other, both pairs of your hands grabbing all that they could, you and him both desperate to hold onto anything.

Kai shoved you backward into a table, trapping you against it as his lips fell downwards, and began to suck at your neck.

But at that contact, you pushed Kai away, freezing for a moment. Damon’s teeth had been on Aaron’s neck, sinking in and draining all that be worth.

“See Elena thinks I’m a monster, and she’s right.” You were unable to move as Aaron stood against the vampire, you had been compelled, and you wanted nothing more than to scream out for Damon to stop, but there was no audio in your throat.

There was no scream as Damon bared his fangs , nor when he sunk them into your boyfriend’s neck, instead you were holding back your tears, as you had been commanded to.

He held him to his mouth for a moment before dropping his body lifeless upon the ground. And you couldn’t help but stare at the sight.

Enzo wore a content smirk, and it sickened you to your stomach. Damon turned, his thirsty eyes boring into your form, that wanted nothing more than to crumble into a million people.

“You may now speak.” His pupils found yours, engaging with your soul, that felt broken and completely shattered.

“Are you going to kill me too?” A part of you was hopeful that he would, but as he came closer, you recognised the mischief in his stance.

He had plans for you, none of which you suspected to like. “Do it, show Elena how much of a monster you really are!”

If he killed you, you’d have liked to think that Elena would be furious , but it was expected that eventually she would forgive him when he put his humanity back on.

“Or instead...” you feared his humoured expression, eyes flickering between his feet that were walking closer to you and your dead partner that lay lifelessly a couple of meters away. “I could show her how much of a monster you are.”

He bit into his wrist, bringing it towards your mouth, and as much as you felt the urge to squirm, you could do nothing more but stand there and abide his compulsion.

“Are you okay?” Kai asked, brushing his nose against your own, wanting to know if you wanted to continue. He knew that you were a victim of trauma, and he understood it’s affects.

In regards to his past, his coping method had been inflicting it in return. But you had done no foul against him, and so he would not torture you or force you into something that you had no intention of continuing.

“Yeah.” You breathed, blinking to push the memory away, temporarily at least. “Bedroom.” You ushered, squealing distractedly as he hoisted you into his arms, wrapping your legs perfectly around his waist.

He dropped you upon the mattress, hovering over you, removing his shirt after you began to tug on the dark and rain pelted material.

Leaning your elbows, you unclipped the back of your bra, discarding it somewhere far from your memory, and Kai sunk down, his lips latching onto your nipple, playing with the other in his rough hands.

“Your fucking gorgeous.” He hummed around your breast, his fingers drifting down your stomach to the band of your leggings.

His compliment made you smile, and as he ripped off your pants, he slipped a hand inside of your panties, rubbing your sensitive flesh. But you groaned, frowning at his tantalising actions.

“Just need you inside of me.” You told him, and he was more than happy to comply, so he worked on his belt, as you slipped off your own underwear, and removed the torn fabric from around your legs.

When you looked up, you noticed that he was completely bare, and already had himself in hand. There was precum balancing on his tip and at the sight you licked your lips.

“You ready?” He asked bringing his head down to your chin, placing a delicate kiss upon the bump, and teasing his other tip against your opening, swiping through your wetness and using it to lube himself up.

“God yes.” You sighed, your hands finding refuge upon the back of his shoulders, your nails sinking into his firm skin.

And so, with consent, he pushed in, groaning at the initial tightness. “And I thought that it was wet outside.” He laughed, causing you to snort, he was funnier than you had expected him to be.

It almost made you swoon, but no, you couldn’t be interested in Kai, could you? Everyone thought you had been, even Bonnie had stated that you often undressed him with your eyes in the worst of situations, but it had never been a big deal to you.

And then it hit you like a ton of bricks, with a snap of Kai’s hips. All along you had denied any interest of another man, all because of the one that you had lost. And everyone already knew that there were sparks between you and the witch, before either of you had caught on.

“Shit.” He huffed, reaching down and biting your lips, causing your eyes to flutter sensuously, and dark veins to appear underneath.

At the feeling, you tried to bury your face sidewards into the pillow so that he couldn’t see, but he held you still as he gave shallow thrusts inside of you.

“Don’t look away, I think you’re beautiful.” Him saying that alone had you almost in tears. Despite trying to bring Aaron back you feared what he would think of you when he returned, or well, if he could.

Would he think you a monster, that stood idly by when he was killed? Because if so, you’re heart would literally break, and you wouldn’t be able to bare living any longer.

Living, funny. You hardly described what you were doing as such anyways. But currently, you did truly feel alive again, perhaps that was just the affect of having a dick inside of you.

But as Kai reached down and fiddled with your clit, you knew that you were done for. Your head fell back, eyes closed and mouth open, showcasing your fangs, your orgasm hitting you like a train.

He continued his movements until he felt he was nearing his point, and then he finished too, having no worry in impregnating you as you were well, to put it lightly , dead.

Both of you panted as he pulled out and fell beside you. Your eyes stared at the ceiling, your concentration eventually broken when Kai spoke.

“Damon did it, didn’t he? He turned you.” Your face had returned to its previous disguise, you looked human once more. But it was no secret that you were now a savage, a monster like Damon.

“Yeah.” You bit your lip, trying not to cry at the thought. It was the last thing in the world that you ever wanted, but Damon knew that too. And so he had cursed you, for all of eternity.

“Then he deserves to die.” Kai stated, he was already against the Salvatores, but his hatred for them had just increased.

#kai parker smut #kai parker imagine #kai parker x reader #kai parker x you #kai parker #kai x y/n #kai imagine #kai x you #kai parker one shot #kai smut #tvdreader #tvd imagines #tvd smut #tvd x reader #tvd x y/n #imagines #imagine #xreader

[franniebanana]

CQL Rewatch - Ep 20

Iconic. Seeing Wei Wuxian back and better than ever is so satisfying! That flute playing that probably we’ve all forgotten about since the first two episodes becomes a repeating leitmotif throughout the series. It’s just as iconic as Wei Wuxian himself. And what I love about this shot here is how the light hits his eyes, and from this specific camera angle, it looks like a mask on his face! I just thought that was super cool. Whether it was intentional or not, I have no idea, but I like to think it was. I guess it’s like a reverse mask in this case—everything is hidden except his eyes.

It’s amazing how I only went without Wei Wuxian for like half an episode, yet it felt like so much longer. The emotional weight that he carries is so great that from all the characters searching for him, it feels like it’s actually been three months, instead of more like twenty-five minutes. And I think that’s something that we can feel in CQL but we can’t really feel in the book. Since the book is written in third person limited, we only see Wei Wuxian’s side of the story (I think that’s accurate, but it’s been a few months since I read it). That being the case, we never leave Wei Wuxian’s side, we never get to miss him being there. Of course the story is framed totally differently in the book and not in chronological order, even—lots of flip-flopping, which is fun but also a little confusing when you’re trying to keep track of a timeline.

I think part of what makes Wang Lingjao so creepy here is that her garish makeup is totally gone: her face is pale and ghoulish, with just the bright red blood trickling out of her nose, mouth, and cut on her cheek. I think they could have made her even more ghostly, but I like what they did for her apparition. It’s fun to see how fast Wen Chao cracks, though. He’s very much all bark and no bite—honestly, such a coward. On the one hand, it’s satisfying to watch him lose it, but on the other, it’s quite disturbing. I toe the line between enjoying it and being disgusted by it, but I love that CQL at least kept in this part of Wei Wuxian’s character. It’s like revenge, no matter how bloody, is okay in Chinese tv, but not the main character being kind of bad. I don’t get why they had to nerf his character to the point of absolving him of all guilt with everything that happened. I like a character who makes bad choices, but feels guilty for it, because that shows depth. Someone who bad things happen to because of the “real villain” aren’t as interesting to me. I think also that Xiao Zhan would have been amazing as the real Wei Wuxian from the book, had they adapted him that way. I also would have really, really loved to see the scene that is only really described to us (I think by Lan Xichen) where a distraught and delusional Wei Wuxian rejects Lan Wangji. Ugh, that would have been so heart-wrenching! Maybe in the donghua…sigh….

So this is important, I think. There was a point in the last episode where Jin Zixuan tells his cousin not to let the crows peck at the dead bodies of their enemies. In other words, don’t desecrate the bodies, even if they are the enemy. Of course, Jin Zixuan didn’t hold any personal grudges towards any of them, at least that we know of. Jiang Cheng certainly does. So even though Wang Lingjao is already dead by her own hand, he whips her with Zidian. Jiang Cheng is becoming more and more twisted by his anger and grief, which he never deals with in a healthy way. He wants revenge against those that have wronged him and his parents, and he really never stops seeking revenge throughout the story. First it’s against the Wens, and then it’s against Wei Wuxian. It’s a fairly slow descent, I think, over years, but I quite like watching him twist like this. While it’s fun and interesting watching someone repent and have a redemption arc, it’s also interesting watching them go the other way.

Lan Wangji seems to know, or at least suspect, that the person who has killed everyone in the Supervisory Office, including Wang Lingjao, is Wei Wuxian. A talent for using talismans (one of which Lan Wangji used himself to escape the Wens), someone who is seeking revenge against the Wen Clan—these things point to Wei Wuxian in his mind. He doesn’t want to say this to Jiang Cheng, he doesn’t even want to admit it himself, but he’s putting the pieces together. I think this is a frightening thought for him. On the one hand, he would be happy to find Wei Wuxian alive, but on the other, what state would they find him in? And what does it mean that he’s killed all these people singlehandedly? This isn’t the Wei Wuxian that Lan Wangji knows and cares so deeply about. This isn’t the man that Lan Wangji was ready to die for. I think his heart is very much filled with dread in this scene.

Jiang Cheng’s line is interesting too—basically, the enemy of my enemy is my friend. Solid, really, but it does come with some problems in reality. The enemy of your enemy just might stab you in the back later. It’s a very simplistic view, but I think at this point, Jiang Cheng is just happy to see the Wens dead. There are a few he wants to kill himself, but he seems satisfied if they just die out, regardless of who does it.

I like seeing Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng team up for these few episodes, because it’s fun seeing how they each approach the situations. Jiang Cheng relies heavily on his heart and emotions, which I can totally identify with. He wants to find Wei Wuxian and he wants revenge on Wen Zhuliu and Wen Chao—those are his two priorities. And then Lan Wangji is definitely more of a logical person—he wants to get to the bottom of these deaths and find out who is the person with so much wicked energy that is doing all of it—and also, that person is probably Wei Wuxian, who he is very interested in finding. Here Jiang Cheng wants to rush after Wen Zhuiliu, just as he did when he went back to Lotus Pier. He’s very rash, while Lan Wangji is much more calm and collected. I mean, if it were me, I’d want to see if they would give up any information before I killed them.

And the reveal is…Wen Chao is fucking disgusting! I didn’t even want to screencap one of the close-ups, because I felt like I’d have to do a trigger warning for blood lol. Not really, though, because I never do, sorry. I love the looks on Jiang Cheng’s and Lan Wangji’s faces, though. Jiang Cheng is so horrified and Lan Wangji is just mildly shocked. I think the real thing is like, who are we dealing with here? Who is this monster who’s been murdering everyone in all these different ways? Who has made Wen Chao look like this? Is this friend or foe? Like I said, Jiang Cheng keeps saying that as long as the person is killing the Wens, he’s fine with it, but I think even he is bothered by this level of mutilation, even against someone he loathes.

It’s hilarious to me that Wen Zhuliu uses this tactic with Wen Chao. Oh, you’re going to insult me? I’m useless? Okay, bye! LOL. Also very amusing that this is really the last conversation they have with each other: this bickering that they’ve probably done over and over off screen. Wen Zhuliu stays by Wen Chao’s side, though, because he’s indebted to Wen Ruohan, of course. It would have been a neat twist to see Wen Zhuliu defect. And you still could have had a dramatic scene where Jiang Cheng chases him down.

I love it! I love it I love it I love it! The flute! This part is so well done (it’s still a little campy, of course, but that’s part of the charm)! I mean, as the audience, we all know who it is by now, but I love that they keep up the mystery because Lan Wangji and Jiang Cheng still don’t know. They didn’t see him walk in. I just love this.

And shock. Jiang Cheng looks significantly more surprised. It had never crossed his mind that the person doing all this was actually Wei Wuxian, the very individual that he’s been searching for. Lan Wangji, on the other hand, doesn’t really look surprised. He looks a little surprised, okay—I’ll give you that. But I think most of what he’s feeling right now is the deep dread of being right. He wanted to be wrong, even when everything pointed to Wei Wuxian. I don’t think he wanted to believe that Wei Wuxian was capable of this, no matter how much he wanted to get revenge for what happened at Lotus Pier. I think there’s disappointment there too—how could he do such a thing? And I’ve giffed this scene with this quote: “He started to estrange her…And they became strangers who knew each other’s heart, so broken as they drifted apart” (Ana Claudia Antunes, Pierrot & Columbine). I think the realization here and a bit later for Lan Wangji that Wei Wuxian has become some other person is quite heartbreaking. He’s like a stranger to him, and that feeling of betrayal when you thought you knew a person inside and out—that hurts. It’s a deep-seated betrayal that Lan Wangji feels throughout this scene.

Oh, what I also like about this part is that when Wei Wuxian appears, neither one of them can look away. They are solely focused on him at this point.

He finally gets his revenge on Wen Zhuliu. And it’s great. They jump through the roof and he strings him up with Zidian. I can’t really say anything about it—Jiang Cheng needed to do this or he never would have been able to move on from Lotus Pier and his parents’ death.

WWX: Have I changed?

JC: No, not exactly.

I love that these lines are exchanged while the camera is on Lan Wangji. Lan Wangji already sees how Wei Wuxian has changed: the flute, the wicked energy, the almost senseless killing—none of these things are like the Wei Wuxian he’s come to love. And yes, I think love—and it hurts more because there is love. Lan Wangji wanted to walk the straight path with Wei Wuxian together, and he feels betrayed by what Wei Wuxian has done. Despite that, he still wants to help him. He implores Wei Wuxian to come back to Gusu with him so that they can help him and bring him back to the right path.

This whole scene feels like Lan Wangji isn’t even in the room, it’s like a private conversation between Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji just happens to overhear. He says nothing. He lets Jiang Cheng ask a hundred questions while Wei Wuxian calmly answers them. Wei Wuxian smiles and laughs, he seems himself, and yet he isn’t. There’s something wrong and Lan Wangji grows more and more perturbed by it as the seconds pass by.

The tension in this scene is palpable. It’s painful, it’s sad, it’s really hard for me to watch. And yet, this is one of my favorite scenes. Lan Wangji is feeling a lot, and he’s held it all in until this moment here. He calls him Wei Ying, and then Wei Wuxian in turn addresses him first as Second Master Lan, and then as Hanguang-Jun, both very formal names. It’s not Lan Zhan anymore—there is no familiarity on Wei Wuxian’s part. I think part of that is his attempt to protect Lan Wangji from any association with him that might actually harm Lan Wangji and his reputation. He’s setting a boundary—a wall—between them. And then when Lan Wangji bites back, Wei Wuxian changes tack: he stars being informal with him again, he brings up how they were good friends, classmates, etc. But that’s not going to work because Lan Wangji is feeling pretty upset right now.

Lan Wangji is desperate, scared, and worried for Wei Wuxian. Sometimes when we’re feeling all that, it can come across as anger, and that becomes worse when someone is dismissive of those feelings. Wei Wuxian is definitely dismissive here. In their interactions, Lan Wangji rarely shows this much emotion, and instead of paying attention to that, Wei Wuxian brushes it off. Jiang Cheng shows that he cares by hugging Wei Wuxian, but Lan Wangji is different—he’s thinking ahead, he’s seeing what Wei Wuxian has started to mess with—demonic cultivation—which can destroy a person’s mind, and he’s terrified. His only thought is to take Wei Wuxian away and try to change him for the better. Of course, just like what his father did to his mother, this cannot work. Even if Lan Wangji manages to force Wei Wuxian to come with him, he won’t be able to control him. All Lan Wangji can really do is try to persuade him.

The intensity of Lan Wangji’s gaze here is something else. This is a man who is desperate to save the person he loves. He is really looking out for Wei Wuxian’s best interests here and is getting no support from Jiang Cheng. I don’t really know what’s going on in Jiang Cheng’s head right now, but he’s definitely finding Lan Wangji’s behavior offensive. He doesn’t understand that Wei Wuxian’s actions will lead to his ultimate destruction, while it is very clear to Lan Wangji. But all I can do here is bring up how they viewed the person who was killing all the Wens earlier, before they even knew who it was. Lan Wangji felt very unnerved by it: he was disturbed by the talismans and disturbed by the various manners of death, while Jiang Cheng’s stance always was that it didn’t matter because the person was clearly on the same side—a dead Wen is a dead Wen no matter who is behind it. And his opinion doesn’t change even after he finds out. It’s not important to him how Wei Wuxian was able to kill all those people. He asks the questions, but he isn’t interested in really hearing the answer. On the contrary, I think Lan Wangji is very interested in those answers, but he wants to hear about it in a controlled environment. He doesn’t want Wei Wuxian to go back to Yunmeng, where he will essentially live with free-rein without boundaries.

As for cinematography, I love how Wei Wuxian holds up his flute here, setting up a literal boundary between him and Lan Wangji. Not only do you have Jiang Cheng creating that wall with his sword, you also have Wei Wuxian. What I mean is, it’s not only Jiang Cheng who wants to keep Lan Wangji out. Wei Wuxian is drawing a line here too: he wants Lan Wangji to stay out of his business. And this morphs into, what happens at this place is not Gusu Lans’ business—it only concerns Yunmeng Jiang Sect.

We all know Wei Wuxian is an arrogant person, but his arrogance and ignorance here is truly stunning. Lan Wangji tells him point-blank that he won’t be able to control this energy if he uses demonic cultivation, and Wei Wuxian does everything but laugh at him. I enjoy this and I hate it at the same time, because Lan Wangji is just fucking worried, you know? And maybe he doesn’t express himself well, but he’s shocked to see Wei Wuxian here, shocked that he’s responsible for all this—he can’t stay calm and collected under these conditions.

In just a few minutes, Wei Wuxian says that he and Lan Wangji are good friends and that Lan Wangji should treat him better, as well as “Who do you think you are? What I do is none of your business.” I’m paraphrasing, but that’s the gist. This scene here, with their faces so close to each other, kills me. This is absolute betrayal for Lan Wangji. It’s as if everything they had built together—all the respect, the affection, the comradery—is gone. The Wei Wuxian that he knew is gone.

I love the way this shot is framed, with Wei Wuxian staring after Lan Wangji, and then Wen Chao pleading, “Forgive me, forgive me.” So apt, because I think Wei Wuxian does feel bad here, I think he feels guilty. I think part of him really missed Lan Wangji and wanted to see him. I think he even knows that what Lan Wangji is doing is out of concern for him over anything else. But I also think Wei Wuxian’s pride gets in the way of that, and his desire for revenge, and even his desire for things to go back to normal. More than anything, Wei Wuxian wants to return to Yunmeng, to his shijie, to be able to live normally again, whatever that really means, because of course everything has changed. Nothing will ever be as it was again. More importantly, he has changed, and can never go back to the person he was before, the person who played so hard, the person who shirked his responsibilities and fooled around in classes, the person who shamelessly teased and flirted with Lan Wangji. That Wei Wuxian is gone. I think Wei Wuxian knows he’s hurt Lan Wangji and does feel bad about it, but he knows he has to push him away to protect him. He doesn’t want to drag Lan Wangji down with him, he feels it’s better this way. And I think, even though CQL!Wei Wuxian does have feelings for Lan Wangji quite a bit earlier than in the book, you can see the one-sided love here, in Lan Wangji’s aggressive behavior as he attempts to save this person he loves. Lan Wangji isn’t willing to give up on him, whereas Wei Wuxian is more prepared to let him go—to push him away to protect him. That’s love too, I suppose, but it’s a love that is meant to be from afar—a sad love, not a passionate one, not a desperate one, not the one that Lan Wangji feels for him.

This is so heartbreaking for Lan Wangji, in part, because they had such a special relationship before. Prior to this, Wei Wuxian prided himself in that he and Lan Wangji went on night hunts together—the clan didn’t matter, whether that was unorthodox or not. And now to see him use his clan as a barrier between them…it’s quite a betrayal. Lan Wangji feels so hurt, so at a loss—he wonders what could he have done differently to prevent this, he blames himself.

This is one of my favorite episodes because of this reunion scene. What you expect is some great reunion, the hugging between Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian, maybe a smile from Lan Wangji because he’s really happy to see him. But instead, you get pain. You get a Jiang Cheng hugging Wei Wuxian, but Wei Wuxian not even returning the hug (he only raises his arm to signal that he wants to break apart). You get a heated confrontation between Lan Wangji and Wei Wuxian, one that is “fondly” thought of as their break-up scene. I love the drama, I love the pain, I love the angst, I love the dichotomy between Yunmeng Jiang and Gusu Lan, I love that this is the start of more tension between Jiang Cheng and Lan Wangji, I love everything about it. The “us and them” dynamic that starts here is so great, and then to see it slowly unravel throughout the next ten episodes, to see Wei Wuxian’s and Jiang Cheng’s relationship fall apart, while Wei Wuxian’s and Lan Wangji’s relationship begins to strengthen again--I eat it up. It’s like my candy. Anyway, I’m excited for what’s to come, excited to talk more wangxian and how it compares to the book (from my dwindling knowledge, that is)! Happy that you all are coming along this ride with me!

Other episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 |

#cql #the untamed #wangxian #lan wangji #wei wuxian #jiang cheng #mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wwx #lwj #wang lingjiao #wen chao #wen zhuliu #cql rewatch #ep 20

[i-love-hobbies]

(This isn't an anti-Eda, anti-Lilith or anti-Bump post. Just read this fully, please!)

Murder and violence are not ok!

This whole thing started literally after s1ep2 where Eda murdered a dude on screen.

What am I talking about?

"It's just a cartoon. Don't read too much into it."

I don't have a very strong opinion on this but I'm not a fan of normalizing murder. Also "Heroes that are genocidal maniacs, kill the villain cause he's awful." sounds extremely cringe.

And why are you reading a post that analyses a part of a cartoon right now?

"Death is normal on the Boiling isles, so that makes it ok."

Woah, woah! WHAT?

If everyone used that logic, slavery would still be a thing.

Just cause it's normalized in a culture doesn't mean it's less harmful or that everyone that comes from that culture does it.

It can be used to explain someone's actions, but not excuse them.

The ignorance of context.

1. Eda's murders

First I wanna point out that it was never emotional, it was all calculated. Remember when Tibbles scammed her, she didn't attack him back. None of her kills are revenge. She has always had something to win from them.

She has murdered two people, probably more, Adegast and Tibbles.

If she didn't kill Adegast. I can see this going two ways. He would starve to death, which means she put him out of his misery or he would slowly go back to full power which ties with Tibbles.

Batman kills the Joker.

No they are not as bad as the Joker but they would have continued trying to hurt her untill they got the idea of killing Willow and Gus in their sleep. TIBBLES KNEW THEIR ADDRESS!

Also if they were willing to do this. Who knows what else they have done to other people too. By doing this she has saved more lifes than she has taken (mostly kids).

Plus this willingness to kill is probably the reason Luz can go to school. Eda's enemies know that if they become an actual treat, things won't end well.

Her enemies are criminals. They are not stupid enough to think that she is helpless without magic. Especially now that she isn't running from the law.

- Now on to almost killing Amity in s1ep5 by making Luz cheat. That was messed up but not that badly.

Witches are harder to hurt, there were healers around who would help a Blight. She saw Amity use abomination so she knew mainly her traps were gonna be activated by a non-living thing.

Luz was going to be injured if that didn't happen. Amity was not in control of her strength and I don't think Lilith thought this trough. Though both sisters would have probably intervened when this got out of hand.

She also isn't the one to force Luz into the fight as many people have said. She has never on screen forced her opinion on someone else except in s1ep9 which was to protect her from school and changed in that episode. Luz just couldn't leave cause quitting ment never being able to perform magic.

Now I know that the right thing to do here was for her to try talk things through. I'm just saying it's not as bad as it seems.

2. Eda's scamming

To get my point across I'm gonna compare it to Wordlob.

Hers is the equivalent of you trying to buy gold and getting plastic. His is the equivalent of you're desperate for a cure and he promises to give it to you and then steals all your money and leaves you to die.

You're not going to try to buy gold when your desperate are you?

Scamming can take different forms and hers is the least harmful.

And consider this, what else can she do to put food on the table with her two adopted kids, Hooty and Owlbert. She can't find a legal job, cause that would be helping Belos, she'll die before she does that and she definitely knows ways to disguise herself but that puts her at risk as well.

3. Lilith's redemption arc still works

Yes, she did murder a bird in s1ep18, but the way it talked and acted. It seemed like it was mimicking speach.

Yes, she did almost kill a child, but she has made up for it probably in that week and a half that we didn't see considering this is the Boiling isles and everything is trying to kill you.

Plus, Eda only talked about the curse, considering "You hurt Luz, you cursed me!" She is not the person who would forget about her kid.

Bonus, she did make up for it on screen as well. In s2ep2 she saved King from Eda's experiments. In s2ep3 she saved Luz and King with her ice glyphs, when she could have just left, giving time for Eda to get them out of there. If Eda didn't show up Lilith would be dead.

4. Bump's jokes

- Dissecting Luz

I don't know why everyone talks about Bump and Amity trying to dissect Luz. They weren't certain if this was going to kill her. They weren't certain if she was alive. All they knew was that the lie will be broken if this would kill her.

Yes, they did try to catch her later on, but not to kill her. They wanted to make sense of what's going on and hopefully find her parents so she gets at the very least a talk on why she shouldn't do this.

Willow just overreacted which in return made Luz do the same.

- Bump's detention room

This room is a hypnosis one. Hypnosis is a job in real life. It can be dangerous but that can also be said about therapy if the therapist is bad. Depends on who does it.

"Impressive still alive!" This is a joke.

If a hypnotic session is stopped in the middle, you'd be too relaxed to be able to move. He was fine, he just needed some time.

- Bump's add

Everything that attacked Matt was alive. He probably did something to piss them off. But yeah Bump should have done something.

- Detention track

Guys knowing what he did for Willow in s1ep3, it's obvious that he was in a lot of stress. If he did what he did in that episode regularly. You just touch an orb and byeeeeee. Then this place should have been crowded.

Plus the wall with troublemakers' names had what six names and a portrait of lord calamity. Eda left school before three decades. And that's all we got.

He was probably not gonna keep them there even though he said so. He probably wasn't even planning that.

- Grom was very messed up. I have nothing to say except I wouldn't be surprised if the Emporer's coven forces this to be a thing and refuses to send actual adults, so the kids learn from a young age or whatever.

- Same with the photomemory class.

- "Bosha got away with murder. I can't say I approve, but at least she's trying new things."

This was a joke. Bosha's parents definitely have influence. His hands are tied like usual so he has learned to make jokes out of it. Plus since when are principals responsible for what happens out of school grounds.

5. The bat queen

She is a protector of palismans and I don't think she started to kill until the government was against her (I'm talking about her cave having bones all over it.)

I can't say it's completely justified like I did with Eda. But I don't see a way out of it where palisman wouldn't be extinct.

Now let's see our vilians' behaviour

1. Adegast

He was trying to kill Eda for his business by using a child as a bait.

2. Tibbles

He almost murdered four children so his stand is revenged.

3. Piniate

Is keeping people captive and literally is making them helpless as a punishment for not writing a book.

4. Demon hunters

They were gonna trow kids off a cliff. I'm not sure why actually.

5. The cat ladies

They were kidnapping children for their cafe.

6. The "coven" inspecture

She was stealing all the magic from none other than kids for power.

7. Wordlob

Who knows how many people have died, lost their jobs and so one, cause of his scams. All for money.

8. Warden wrath

He cut Eda's head so she goes out with him. Captures people for nothing.

9. Odalia and Alador

Alador was not stopping Odalia from trying to kill Luz. In their mind this was gonna help in combination with their child abuse, with their daughter helping their business. Everything they have done for now is for their business.

They backed up when Alador saw an opportunity for THEIR BUSINESS.

10. Kikimora

She tried to murder a child, cause of jealousy. Uses her authority to make the system even worse, cause how dare them look in her direction.

11. Belos

Is abusing a child and abused Lilith. Is the reason that palisman are getting extinct. Wild magic= death sentence. Basically created a horrible authority system that has created a lot of suffering and who knows how many it has killed. Probably all for power, though we don't know completely.

#toh #the owl house #toh eda #eda clawthorne #eda the owl lady #edalyn clawthorne #the owl lady #toh lilith #lilith clawthorne #toh bump #toh bat queen #toh vilians #toh kikimora #toh belos #emporer belos #toh odalia #toh alador #toh golden guard #toh hunter

[beautifulterriblequeen]

B2:S - Chapter 3

Much of this series will be about the differences and additions in the novel version, and how they contribute to my understanding of story canon. But there will be character appreciation, the odd theory and headcanon, and suchlike as well.

Here be Lujanne, Callum, Rayla, Ezran, Bait, and Soren goodness!

Spoilers for Book Two: Sky below.

Lujanne having excellent fitness for all her walking around the Moon Nexus, and she's so energetic that Callum has trouble keeping up with her! She seems like those active grandmas who almost never stop moving, who have a lifelong supply of endless stamina. It makes me wonder if Lujanne will need that level of fitness for some upcoming conflict.

Callum feeling really hungry over not eating grubs and then still deciding he'd rather be hungry. It makes me wonder all over again how Lujanne got to the point where she eats grubs, considering that other Moonshadow elves we know of back in the Silvergrove don't. I still love my hc that the giant leech ate all of Lujanne's moonberry bushes and she's taking her revenge. Whatever's going on there, Callum is definitely not at that point yet.

When Lujanne asks Callum how he knows she's real, he thinks to himself that he'd put up with just about anything from someone who was going to teach him magic. That's a great parallel and foreshadowing for Viren's student/master relationship with Aaravos! And it's telling that neither student gets exactly what they hoped to get. Lujanne doesn't actively teach Callum any spells, because she believes he can't learn Moon magic at all. Aaravos does offer Viren power, but it takes him to some very dark places - literally and figuratively - and the cost is terribly high.

Callum sees a moon shape among the ruins, and Lujanne explains that the Moonhenge layout is an intricate rune that uses the structures themselves as part of its symbols and power. That's apparently a thing even with ordinary Moonshadow villages like Hollow Wood in the east, which is the coolest idea I've seen in a while: city planning as magic runes!

Yes, that's the same shape as the pendants Ethari made for himself and Runaan. Protection? Home? Feelsiness? A sense of safety and belongnig for all cycles and seasons?

Wonder what this Moonhenge rune stands for, then, and how much of this landscape is included in that rune. I bet it's more than we think!

But it makes sense now, how toppling the stone pillars would disable the spell the druids would cast to connect with the Moon Nexus lake. Breaking the infrastructure of the Moonhenge breaks the rune.

There's a physical sensation involved with the visuals that Historia Viventem brings up! When that one ghostly druid walked through Callum, he felt icy cold. Like in ghost stories. I really wonder about what exactly Historia Viventem is doing when it activates. It shows truth, "what really happened here?", so it must have some kind of time-related element, maybe tied to how the moon always repeats the same cycles or something. But it also seems to draw on the spirits of any living people involved in the flashback, because Callum could physically feel that wispy shape passing through him. So very interesting!

Orrr... is that all wrong, and there's something else at work with this spell than time? Maybe the world beyond life and death can act as an imprint of the things that have happened in the living world, and the spell that Lujanne (and later Callum) casts taps into that place, with perfect recall. I'm looking really hard at the sentence that says "dozens of translucent elf ghosts" and "phantom Moonhenge" and "lost in their own world" here.

Lujanne says more here than in the show about the world beyond life and death, being her mysterious Moonshadow-mage self. She says that "beyond" and "between" might both apply to where this other plane of existence is, and she doesn't much care which. With all the relativity swirling around this place, and not much in the way of empiricism, it's sounding like perhaps multiple conflicting ideas might actually coexist in such a place, allowing more ideas to fit there than we might normally believe is possible. Which is a fascinating bit of worldbuilding. Basically, every headcanon anyone has ever had about the Moon Nexus could all be true at the same time, for all we know.

Oh oh oh, Callum coming in soft with a secret wish! He takes one look at the Moonhenge and immediately thinks of finding a way to see his mom again! Poor boy, my heart! I'd say that could be another interesting parallel with Viren, but then, who wouldn't hold that sentiment?

Oh my, is this another breath of life into Ye Olde Ley Lines headcanon? Lujanne mentioning the Nexuses again, so soon after talking about the runic design of the entire Moonhenge, makes me wonder if the six nexuses are in fact giant runes. On Earth, the places where ley lines cross are called nexuses, and there are those who believe those points got marked with ancient structures, like Stonehenge and many many others. If Xadia were crossed with magical lines which naturally formed nexus points where they met, and if powerful magical runes were built across those entire areas, well. That would be cool beans, fams. Can I smack a map of Xadia and release a spell like Luz Noceda does? Because ngl that is my first instinct here.

Lujanne has got to be missing some grandkids to spoil, right? The way she's always whipping out cake and ice cream for Callum, and she's so grandma-ish about it. Headcanon about her being Runaan's mom aside, she is canonically lonely and she's very sweet to Allen and Ellis and I think she's missing whatever family she once had in the past. She may never get to have that family back, so she's finding a new one among the humans who live nearby, and I think that's sweet. Found family isn't just for the young.

But Ellis is straight up gonna be her fave, I bet, because she didn't turn up her nose at Lujanne's illusion food!

Ezran and Bait have a lot more to their relationship than was visible in the show, and I'm so excited by it! Ez can tell by looking at Bait's colors that he's not truly jealous of Zym, even if he's really grumpy about the dragonling taking up his favorite human's time.

And Ez thinking a lot about his dad and the things he's taught him. They're soft leadership material, and I love that so much! "Pick your battles" and the importance of encouragement. Ahh, my heart. Ezran, you're going to be such a good king.

But wait a second: both times that Bait gets extra grumpy in Zym's first training session, Ezran has just mentioned something about flying. Guys, I think Bait wishes he could fly, really badly. And that's his biggest problem with Zym, and with Ezran teaching Zym to fly, instead of Bait who doesn't have wings so. Bait is so old that his secrets have secrets, and I'm really curious how flying fits into them now!

Rayla, Dramatic Assassin: "I need to patrol for dark forces." That's what Lujanne called the source of the purple wisps that found them. I wonder if that's an official term all Moonshadows know, or if Rayla is just taking her cue from a veteran Moon mage. And I wonder how far Rayla is falling into the apparent pattern of "one mage, one assassin", since she does spend a lot of her time patrolling without being asked.

When Callum tells Lujanne that he was bad at prince stuff, and she asks if he didn't give up and got good at those things anyway, it's an opportunity for Callum to embrace subverting his parents' expectations in favor of seeking his own path, which is a primary theme of the show. But Lujanne is a couple generations older than Callum, at the very least, and I have to wonder what her upbringing was like. Is her version of success the one she took? Was she bad at magic once too, but she persisted? She is very soft and doesn't want to kill anyone.

Maybe Lujanne had dreams of doing something else with her life, but she felt she had to pursue the destiny that others handed to her, so she studied magic as hard as she could, and she did get good at it, but using it to defend Xadia from humans is not what she wanted to do with her life. Whether there's a parallel between her and Ethari on that point, there's one between Callum and Ethari, I think. How much of your life are you willing to let others direct for you?

LISTEN I WAS DYING AT THE EAR BREAD SCENE OKAY

This is my new favorite Soren and Claudia moment ever. Soren loves him his bread, okay. Even as earplugs for Claudia's sleep ocarina tune. The fact that it's "super effective" makes me think of a Pokemon defense. The fact that he learned it at camp, where he also learned about Moonshadow Madness, is hilarious. Later on, Corvus doesn't know Soren by name, but I still love the idea of Corvus being a kind of Strider-esque camp instructor, filling the ears of his young charges with all kinds of useful tactics like ear bread for magic spell songs (which actually seemed to work as intended), and warnings about the enemy elves' blood-themed tactics (which may or may not come back around in BH)

I thought they were gonna go in a kind of deep direction when Soren still wanted his ear bread back, but then he just. Eats them. Just noms them. I love this kid. Give Soren all the bread!

#book two: sky spoilers #book two: sky #b2:s #tdp spoilers #ToX spoilers #gloaming glade spoilers #lujanne #callum #rayla #ezran #tdp zym #soren #tdp claudia #tdp bait

[shewantedtobeasecretgirl]

12. Granny Out of Control a.k.a. headless chickens, Gene Simmons’ girlfriend and Rapunzel

In the previous chapters: Judy and Stone act after their embarrassing encounter in the shower as if it hadn’t even happened; they implicitly agree on not telling Mike that his one-night stand was just the consequence of Judy’s revenge-fueled rumors about Stone’s sexual preferences. Ed loses his voice so the show has to be canceled, Jeff offers to give guitar lessons to Judy instead in his spare time. Granny buys a metal magazine to learn more about Seattle-based rock bands; the picture of Pearl Jam makes her think the perfect match for Judy isn’t Jeff but Stone. Krisha picks Effie up in the city to tell her that Kelly Curtis and Susan Silver have plans with her as a photographer; she also gives her the list of codenames the band and crew members use at hotels. Effie also joins her when she feeds Stone’s unsociable cat, Red who is incompatible with all girls who try to approach him.

 „I don’t know, man… Are you sure you saw them?”

“Don’t piss me off, Schmitty, of course I’m sure. I know whom and what I saw.” I mumble as I put the flashlight back between my teeth. I can’t believe I’m doing this. Not only makes he me do this stupid act, he even drives me crazy with this weak-minded questioning in the meantime. The guy obviously watches too much TV. Especially detective shows about drug cartels.

“But let’s go over it again. Maybe you were wrong or misunderstood the situation or…”

I sigh, and take the flashlight out of my mouth only to direct the blinding ray of light in his face.

“Okay, but this is the last time. And I’m only willing to tell it again because I have nothing better to do and because technically, I can’t do anything else until we finish this. Open the bag and hold it.”

“Yes sir... so you went having a shower…”

“Not that it matters if I went showering or shitting but yes, I went to the restroom.”

“And you opened the door…” he goes on with the storytelling like a small child who already knows his favorite bedtime story by heart.

“And there were they, standing at the sinks…”

“Stop. Are you sure it was them?”

“Of course I am, I could recognize Judy and Stone from miles!”

“Are you 100 % sure?”

“No, I’m only 99 % sure because there’s a very small chance that they both have doppelgangers right in this town but let’s say I’m very likely to have seen them.” I confirm while I start portioning the green leaves into the plastic bag Schmitty is holding.

“And they were…”

“…basically naked.”

“Basically?” he asks like he’d never heard the word before.

“Yes, basically.”

“How do you mean “basically”?”

“What? I’m fucking around here with sharing my weed with you and you’re already high? Unbelievable…”

“No-no-no, seriously, man, you didn’t say “naked”, you said “basically naked”. Define the difference. It’s important.” he flails fussily.

“Stop shaking the bag, it’s difficult enough to do this only with one hand. So, uh, they weren’t completely naked, they both were wearing a towel…”

“The same towel or…?”

“Hah, interesting idea, but no, they both had their own towel on. But I assume none of them was wearing any underwear…”

“That’d be normal, I mean, after showering… but that’s the weakest point in your theory, them having a shower at the same time… it sounds so unreal.”

“Yeah, I thought the same until I found the only logical reason.”

“What? That you only dreamed the whole thing? Or that it was just an intense trip due to the shrooms Mike gave you?”

“I know it sounds unbelievable but at this point, I’m pretty much convinced they did it on purpose.” I close the bag and throw it at Schmitty who hides it immediately in the inner pocket of his jacket and pats himself on the chest satisfied.

“Thanks. But I can’t follow your thinking, Scully. Why’d they secretly meet in the shower?”

“I don’t want to shock you but… I think they had sex right before. I almost entered but then I glanced them and they were almost naked, both giggling and Judy was groping Stone and… I backed out, I was so surprised, I didn’t even know what to do…”

“But they hate each other.” Schmitty protests shaking his head.

“And? Since when can’t people who hate each other have sex with each other?”

“Man, this is too much to me, Stone has Amber at home, Judy is like a nun, they can’t stand each other so obviously, they have sex??? Bullshit, that’s all I can say. I don’t know what you saw but it definitely couldn’t be a post-coital scene.”

“Look, I don’t understand the exact reasons either but…”

“I’ve always been told that as soon as we start touring, girls will try to drag me in the tour bus all the time but I imagined it somehow different…”

We both freeze at the hearing of Stone’s smug giggling and our surprise only grows when we recognize the voice that belongs to his companion.

“Sorry for ruining your wet rock star dreams but it’s impossible here to talk to someone face-to-face, even the walls have ears in this crew.”

Schmitty and I exchange a meaningful look and to his nod, I turn the flashlight on the lowest level. Walls might not have ears here but this bunk bed curtain we’re hiding behind definitely does. Even four, to be exact.

“So what’s the purpose of this conspired, hyper-secret meeting, Camden? I’m hungry so let’s get over with this as fast as possible!”

Hungry, yeah, I can imagine. So you prefer quickies, Stoney?

“I just wanted to talk about yesterday.”

Schmitty stares at me with popped eyes, even his jaws drop of shock.

“Ha. So you were thinking about it?”

“Yes but not the way you think. I’m not gonna tell you tirades about how much I regretted it or stuff because I didn’t. I only want to ask if you talked to Scully about it?”

Schmitty grabs my forearm, digging his nails into it, his other hand is shaking uncontrollably.

“No and I don’t know why I should force it, I mean it happened, it’s embarrassing enough for both of us so let’s draw a veil over it.”

“It’s embarrassing for both of us? Do you really think I give a damn about that? I mean, okay, I lost control, which doesn’t happens really often to me but who cares, I can handle the consequences. You feeling embarrassed, now that’s the last thing I care about. But have you already thought about the feelings of your friend at least for one single second?”

We both furrow our eyebrows and her words probably found their marks since Stone doesn’t answer, which makes Judy go on with the pep talk.

“Okay, neither of us is going to say a word since we both have selfish interest in keeping it in secret but if Scully shoots his mouth off and he finds out about what happened… just think into it, it’d ruin his self-esteem. I mean, it’s inevitable that it turns out later but the best strategy is discretion. Now, it’d be too fresh for him, let’s wait until he forgets about this little… intermezzo.”

Schmitty covers his still opened mouth in complete horror and even I start feeling uncomfortable now that my intuition is basically confirmed.

“So, would you finally promise to talk to Scully?”

“Dunno… I’ll consider it.”

“Jesus Christ, Gossard, would it hurt not to piss me off once in a lifetime?”

“To answer your question, yes, it would but this time it’s not about you, Miss Fussy. I was just thinking that we should let it slide since after all, it’s not as a big deal as you think.”

You fuck her and then try to ditch her? Come on Stone, I thought you were better than this.

“I mean, you make such a fuss but I don’t think Scully would let it slip, he’s probably already forgotten about the whole scene. And if I came up with it, he’d just start overthinking it; when he knows he has to shut his mouth, he becomes gossipy all the more.”

Ha, thanks Stoney but just for the record, I don’t gossip, I just process things by discussing them with other people, see also at “coping mechanisms”…

“It’s you who’s overthinking it. Just stop protesting and do what I ask you. I even use the word “please”.”

“Fuck, okay, I’ll see what I can do, just leave me finally alone with this. Can I ask you something too?”

“It depends…”

“Could we stay here for ten… fifteen minutes? You know, it’s about my reputation…”

“Fuck off, Gossard!!!”

We both exhale with a deep sigh when we hear them leaving the bus.

“Holy. Shit.”

“Holy. Fucking. Shit. Dude, you were right!”

“Of course I was right, I always am, you just never believe me.“

“But… damn… I didn’t see that coming… Gahhh.” Schmitty facepalms, rubbing his forehead worried.

“I’m surprised, though, I thought they didn’t notice me.”

“Apparently, they did. Jesus, I doubt there’s something serious between them but now that I heard it with my own ears, it all makes sense! They hook up, they are both embarrassed since they are enemies, plus the Amber-factor… and poor Jeff, he has a massive crush on Judy and she knows it, maybe she tries to have two irons in the fire… So she convinced him to keep the fling in secret not to ruin her chances at Jeff… She looks so innocent and now she turns out to be an actual snake… Do you think Karrie knows about it?” he jabbers staring desperately in front of himself.

“Whoa, stop, dude, are you insane? She’s not a bitch, they just made a mistake and she freaked out. Her worrying about Jeff sounded genuine, after all, Stone is no perspective for her, he’s got that… he’s got Amber, whatever she is for him. And I don’t think Karrie knows anything, even if she does, she’ll pretend she doesn’t.”

“But this changes everything! Jeff is our friend too and I don’t want to lie to him.”

“Trust me, he’ll never ask “And tell me Schmitty, have Judy and Stone had sex?”, so you don’t have to.”

“You’re making fun of me but you know too how dangerous information these are so you’d better have a good idea what are we going to do know.”

“I’ll tell you, Schmitty: we’re gonna act casual. Just watch me.”

***

„There’s no chance I could reach that string. Just… no. I don’t have that muscle, I’m done.” I moan as I desperately try to stretch my pinky finger to play the next chord following Jeff’s instructions.

“Hey, relax, just reach a bit further, you’ve almost got it.” he chuckles and makes an insecure move to help me out but he changes his mind in the last moment and pretends he only wanted to scratch his arm. And I pretend not to have noticed it.

“No, it’s impossible, I can’t twist my wrist that much. I don’t have freakishly long fingers like Stone, it’s enough.” I give up and put the guitar aside. We’ve been practicing for like one hour, I played him my still rudimentary sounding song idea, of course without telling him what exactly it was. He improvised a bass line to it on his acoustic bass guitar, his fingers are still running back and forth over the strings despite the fact I stopped playing. When I was a kid, Grandpa would tell me that if you cut the head of a chicken, it can still run around for a few seconds before collapsing, maybe it’s a similar phenomenon. Or maybe it’s like when a freight train hits a car and it pushes the vehicle in front of itself for miles before stopping. Headless chickens and train wrecks, why am I thinking about stuff like these while hanging out with a nice guy?

“I’m sure you can do it if you practice it. Look, my fingers aren’t long either.” he raises his palm. Is he expecting me to measure mine to his by placing them together? Could we rather just draw them around and compare the drawings like small children? Okay, he’s got strong, manly hands, that’s not bad at all. But how can he stuff those thick fingers between the strings? And those jewelries, God, they are terrible. Would he mind if I asked him to put them off?

“No, I can’t. I’m not good at these moves, I’ve already tried to play the violin, it didn’t go well. It went awful.” I protest, rather to overtalk my racing thoughts than to argue with him. I hope he’s not going to ask me about the details, I don’t feel like telling him that story at all.

“Okay, it was you who asked me for help, so…” he shrugs with a half smile, his fingers are still nerve-wrackingly torturing the instrument.

“Actually it was you who offered to help so…”

“Fair enough. I don’t want to force it so… if you want to finish all your future performances by saying “sorry, now comes the chord which is incompatible with my wrist so go the fuck home” – then okay, I don’t care.” he puts down the guitar. I try to decode the expression on his face, is he disappointed or just casual or…?

“How do you do that?” I ask quickly, I can’t bear that look.

“What?”

“This… everything…” I flail helplessly.

“I don’t know… I think I got bored with doing nothing and wanted to try something new and I realized I could do everything instead of nothing.” he leans back with a challenging smirk.

“Geez, you spend too much time with Stone.” I roll my eyes. “I mean… I played you something and you immediately knew what to do with it. Your head is full of ideas and variations, can you hear the harmonies instinctively or…?”

“I don’t know… when I hear a melody, I start hearing the other parts in my head… but sometimes I just mess around and try different things to check if they can work as a song or as an idea that I can use later. I try to keep my ears fresh, I fight against crafting only bass lines in my head, that’s why I pick up the guitar from time to time. You know, if a bass player never leaves his comfort zone, after a while, he’ll tend to operate only with the same five or five notes, it’s like a tunnel vision… or tunnel hearing…” he ends his explanation with a shrug and a lopsided smile, as far as I’ve observed, he does that pretty often.

“That’s amazing… I envy you so much. I’ve been studying and playing music for as long as I can remember but I’ve never felt that… sense of liberty? I practiced my ass off, I learned everything I could, at Juilliard, we basically dissected classical musical pieces into single notes and… I developed some weird perfectionism in the meantime, I know how good music is supposed to be composed but… I myself just can’t do it. I was so busy with studying other people’s works that I couldn’t develop the ability to create something, it’s like… my knowledge paralyzed my creativity… Or that’s just what I keep telling myself because I1m not willing to accept the fact that writing music is a gift you can’t just earn by practicing and learning…”

“Maybe you’re right.” he shrugs again and his reaction somehow hits me hard; I don’t know why, though. “I think I’ve already mentioned you that I took piano lessons but I hated it. I found literally nothing intriguing in it, it was boring, I’ve never been into Beethoven or some shit like that.”

“What?” I frown. I didn’t expect him to like the same things I do but… could he just show at least a little interest in what I like? I even talked about art and skateboarding with him. Okay, he doesn’t owe me anything, we’re not dating and all but if he ever wants something from me… okay, he probably doesn’t, it was obviously just a stupid gossip.

“Hey, I didn’t mean to trash your music, it’s just not for me, I appreciate it but I don’t like it. I’m just a Montanan jerk, did you forget?”

“You’re not a jerk, don’t say that… I’m just… nothing, forget it.”

“No, if you want to say something, don’t swallow it. Did I hurt you?”

“You didn’t… I’ve just spent my entire life playing classical music so I can’t imagine how someone is able not to like it at all.”

“Same here with sports.”

“God, I hate sports!” I exclaim and I immediately begin to laugh realizing I’m not better than him either.

“You see? But speaking of your music studies, there’s one thing I’ve always wanted to ask.”

“No.”

“No what? Am I not allowed to ask the question?”

“No is the answer to the question.”

“But I haven’t even…”

“Trust me, it’s no.”

“If you say so…”

“I’m just kidding. Most people attack me when they learn I’m a musician asking if I’d sing or play something for them, it’s so annoying, it’s like the “grunge question’ of classical musicians…”

“Okay, I get it.” he smiles. “But that’s not what I was about to ask.”

“Thank God. So, I guess you don’t want me to teach you reading sheet music either, because that’s usually the second question, which is usually asked by people with no musical hearing at all...”

“No, it’s more of a… personal one.” he hesitates squinting at me for the final permission.

“Hit me.”

“Why are you here?”

“Here? Like, here and now, with you or…?”

“No, I mean, why are you here, with the band? You graduated from one of the most prestigious music schools on Earth, you could conduct top choirs or whatever… and you’re here, loading our shitty van every single night, smelling sweat and cigarette smoke, spending days in a tour bus with beer drinking ugly dudes… Why? I guess Juilliard graduates can pick whatever job offer they want so...”

“I’m here for the money.” I answer without thinking and it immediately sounds false. Am I? Really? “I came here for the money, I don’t deny it, I had no job and however terrified I was, something told me I had to take this opportunity.”

“But… as a classical musician trained at Juilliard… why this job? I just can’t get it.”

“Well… I’ve known for a very long time that the music of baroque era is in which I’m the most interested. It’s, you know, a passion to me, it’s like punk was to you. And if you want to be really good at it, you have to go to the place where it comes from. Here in the States, you can basically hear nothing that was written before Mozart.”

“Europe?”

“Exactly. So in my senior year, I applied for a scholarship of the music academy in Leipzig.”

“And…?”

“And I won it.”

“So you studied in Europe too?”

“No, I didn’t.”

“Why?”

“Because my father died a few months before I graduated and the small firm he ran died with him… it was a very complicated period so I asked the academy if I could postpone it by one year.”

He’s chewing his lower lip and speaks up only after digesting for a few seconds what he’s just heard.

“And they refused your application?”

“No, they sent me a kind acceptation letter in which they cited their scholarship regulation that said postponement is allowed once. So I moved back to Seattle and started teaching.”

“Oh. I guess something came up one year later too.”

“Well yeah, my sister’s almost dying, that came up.”

He exhales with a deep sigh, I have the feeling he already knew all the details, he just couldn’t do the math. Maybe Karrie told him our family saga. I don’t mind, though, I don’t feel like telling him those stories either…

“Well, that’s a lot… but it also sounds like… you gave up your dreams.”

Now it’s me who can’t do anything else but shrug.

“Maybe… or maybe, it was just a warning from the universe. I’m not religious but I do believe that everything happens with a reason, maybe you can’t find it out ever because it’s something bigger than you or your shitty little life. My family needed me and they still do, or at least they need my two hands I can make money with so… plus, I’ve always been terrified of performing. I have worst stage fright, I doubt I would be able to conduct in the spotlight of the world’s biggest concert halls… anyways… have you ever heard about famous, female conductors?”

“Normally, I’d say you’re a coward and you should follow your dreams but I understand the family factor, of course. And I don’t want to act like a hypocrite either, I could have looked for another graphic design program too when mine was canceled in Missula.”

“But changed your dream instead.”

“Exactly. And maybe that’s what you should do too if universe or God or Buddha or the spirit of Johann Sebastian Bach is trying to message you that you picked the wrong dream.”

“Are you trying to say I should switch my brain to believe loading shitty vans and smelling Scully’s and Schmitty’s stinky feet is my real dream?” I giggle.

“If that’s your way, than go for it, girl!” he plays the overly enthusiastic motivational trainer. We crack up but none of us is laughing heartfelt. His face finds finally rest in a genuine, encouraging smile. “Let’s raise our glasses to the new dreams!”

We both reach our hands to clink our imaginary glasses.

“To the new dreams!”

***

I’ve been on the road with them for days and nothing. Not a single move or a sound that’d confirm we’re following the right traces. And I’m thirsty. So thirsty. But they are so envious, I know they are hiding spare water in their stupid spacesuits or what but they claim they have nothing to share. Sure. I would never drink recycled pee, anyway. But those two moons look pretty cool, the night sky compensates me for every inconvenience I’ve experienced since we started chasing that gross sandworm… everything for the melange…

However important my mission is, it gets interrupted by three quick, impatient knocks on the door.

“You’ve been shitting in there for forty-two minutes! I know you’ve finished and you’re just reading! I have to pee! Get the fuck out of there! Why do you have to do this all the time?”

Maybe because this is the only place where I can have some progress with my current reading undisturbed? I reluctantly close the hardcover volume of Frank Herbert’s Dune and glance lazily at my wristwatch.

“First of all, it’s been only forty minutes. Second, it’s shorter than a blink of an eye, if you measure it in cosmic time. Not even applicable.”

“Okay, I can use astronomical metaphors too. My bladder is a red giant that is about to explode so…”

“I’m coming, I’m coming, geez, urinary incontinence? You should see a urologist.” I remark opening the door. He basically tosses me out of is his way and almost slams it on my nose.

“It’s rather you who should see a doctor, fuck, Stone, what did you eat? Uuugh, I’m dying.” I hear his muffled indignation.

I lie down on my bed and stuff the pillow under my nape. I turn the pages back and forth for a few times until find the place where I was before Mike kicked me out. So, back to those goddamn pervert Fremen fuckers…

I barely manage to read a few lines, when Mike comes back and throws himself on his bed, unmuting the TV that is showing underdressed ladies caressing their own body and telling their erotic fantasies in seductive voice. I clear my throat. No reaction. I do it again, this time longer and louder. Nothing.

“Sorry, am I bothering?” I ask sharply but our guitarist seems to be completely immersed in the curves. “Okay, busted. I know you only went to the toilet to jerk off. You only watch Playboy TV and noname porn channels, you really need to get laid.”

“Done, last night. Remember?” he answers slowly and mindlessly, his eyes are still glued to the screen.

“No, because I wasn’t there, thank God.”

“You’re just envious because you have to practice celibacy, otherwise Amber would cut your balls off.”

I squint at the girls over my book.

“Not that I feel tempted. Jesus, I’m sick of these… udders…”

“Hey, watch your mouth! Those ladies deserve more respect! Especially her!” he points at the blonde, blue-eyed, busty woman on the screen who is dropping her lingerie standing at a bath tub.

“Why, who is she?” I look back at the text in front of me, not that I understand a word of it. Since I receive no answer I turn my head towards Mike only to see he sat up in the meantime and stares at me offended. “What? I have no idea.”

“That’s Shannon Tweed!!!” he flails outraged.

“… who is…?”

“Who is a goddess, Playmate of the Year in 1982 and last but not least, the girlfriend of Gene Simmons!”

“Oh. So she’s old as dirt.” I summarize laconically.

“Stone, what’s wrong with you? What’s wrong with her? What’s wrong with big boobs? I thought you liked them… I mean, you are the guy who’s entitled to do anything with Seattle’s most spectacular pair of bosoms so…”

“Hey, you’re talking about my girlfriend!” I grunt.

“I’m talking about your girlfriend’s tits!”

“Exactly, that’s it! Don’t talk about my girlfriend’s tits! Anyway, how do you know what they look like?”

“Hey, first, I’m only talking about them. It’s called freedom of speech, First Amendment…”

“What the fuck, parts of the Constitution are printed now on beer tags or did I miss something?”

“…second, it is very difficult not to know what they look like, they basically poke your eyes out!”

“Only talking, ‘course.”

“Certain female anatomical features attract men’s eyes, it’s in our genetic code. Don’t even try to make me believe those features had nothing to do with you ending up with her. Wait!” he exclaims with a finger snapping. “Oh, I get it already. You miss her! That’s why you can’t stand the playmates on TV! But you could have said, it’s not a shame…”

“Dr. ‘Cready, expert of constitutional law and anatomy, psychotherapist. I’ve just said I don’t feel tempted…”

“Because those boobs” he points at the screen “are forbidden fruit and remind you of those boobs in Seattle.”

“You’re pointing in the wrong direction, Michael. You’re pointing at boobs in Indiana.”

“Whatever. You miss her, admit it. My boobies are over the ocean, my boobies are over the sea…”

“Stop!”

“My boobies are over the ocean so bring back my boobies to me…”

“Shut the fuck up!”

“BRING BAAACK, BRING BAAACK, BRING BACK MY BOOBIES TO ME, TO MEEEE!”

“I’m only saying that even huge breasts can be boring after a while.” I overshout his off-key singing.

Mike suddenly stops singing and just blinks at me completely frozen.

“You mean… you want to leave Amber?”

“Jesus, what did I do to deserve this?” I bury my face in my hands. “I mean… imagine your favorite food!”

“But that’s… risotto…?”

“Perfect!”

“But risotto doesn’t look like boobs!”

“Jesus, of course not, just imagine it!”

“Okay. Mmmh, it looks delicious. I can even feel its smell.” he moans with closed eyes.

“So you want to eat risotto now, right?”

“Oh yeah, I want it more than anything.”

“And if you could… or had to eat risotto every single day, would you feel the same?”

“Uhm, probably… not.” he opens his eyes.

“And here we are. If you’re in the position where you can play with huge breasts every day, it’s not such a big deal anymore.”

“Hm, makes sense…” he lies back. “But wait!” he sits up quickly again.

“What?”

“In that case, risotto wouldn’t be my favorite food anymore.”

“Yeah, probably…”

Congrats Sherlock. I drop my book on the nightstand, by now, I basically gave up all hope for finishing the chapter I was reading.

“But that means that you prefer small boobs now!”

“I didn’t say that but obviously, smaller tits have their appeal too. And there are girls who would look ridiculous with big breasts.”

My mind begins to wander involuntarily… Yeah, Amber is a bombshell and she drives me crazy whenever she’s around but I’ve always had a thing for more fragile looking girls…

“Who are you thinking about?” Mike asks greedily like a curious puppy.

“Jesus, no one.” I scoff frowning. “I mean, very slim girls look better with… proportionate breasts, you know, like small apples…”

I catch myself cupping my hands, what the hell, am I honking imaginable tits in the air? Okay, I have to talk to Eric to fly Amber here, I’m going to put an end to this, I’m pathetic.

“Say an example!”

What? I don’t know whom I was thinking about, I don’t even know if I was thinking about an existing person, maybe I was just fantasizing about freaky phantom breasts, I couldn’t even see them, it was just a desirable cleavage… and round hips… and shapely thighs…

“I can’t!”

“Just say an example, I don’t know, someone famous who looks like that, or someone who we both know…”

“Kylie Minogue?” I groan in agony. Hopefully I satisfied Mike’s need for a new protagonist for his erotic dreams because he only nods with an appreciative pout.

The ringing of the phone on the bedside between us interrupts our intellectual conversation and we both stare at the device surprised and confused for a few seconds, it’s usually us who call family members and friends, not the other way around. Finally, I decide to pick up.

“It’s Stone.”

“…” No one answers but I can hear some indistinct noises coming from the other end of the line.

“Hello… who’s that? Wo am I talking to?” I ask, and Mike pulls closer to the speaker of the receiver too.

“Ah… excuse me… I must have dialed the wrong number… you’re obviously not the Notre Dame Hunchbach…” an old female voice answers.

What the hell? Is this a prank call? Old people make phone pranks too?

“Who?” I mouth to Mike who mouths “Judy” as a response. Ah, yes. She also chose a codename, not that anyone is interested in her. “You’re talking to Dr. Hugh Jeego, but who am I talking to?”

“Ah, you must be Mr. Gossard. I’m Mrs. Albertson, Judy’s grandma.”

I almost drop the receiver.

“Ugh… uhm… hi, Mrs. Albertson, it’s nice to meet you… I mean, even if not in person but… I guess you wanted to call Judy so…” I make an attempt to finish this awkward intermezzo but she cuts me off.

“Actually, I am glad that I can talk with my Judy’s new colleague, this job is so different in comparison to what she worked earlier, you know, she taught in a school…”

“Yeah, I know…”

“…and now she’s with a rock band, and there are so many rumors about musicians, they drink and do drugs and…”

“We… we don’t drink… that much… not before shows…” I answer and Mike nods approvingly opening a beer can with a loud fizz. “… and we prefer herbs…”

“And mushrooms…” Mike adds.

“Shut up, you ruin everything!” I hiss between my teeth while I cover the microphone with my palm.

“Who was that?”

“It was… it was Mike, our lead guitarist.”

“Ah, Mr. McCready!”

Mike pats his chest proudly.

“Exactly, Mr. McCready…” I flip him the bird.

“I hope my Judy takes care of herself, she tends to become obsessed with work, she even forgets to eat… does she eat properly?”

“I’ve… I’ve seen her eating… so I guess she does…” I try to reassure her but I’m afraid I don’t sound very convincing; after all, the eating habits of Miss Smarty Pants don’t belong to my main interests.

“I wish she ate more, she’s so skinny, isn’t she?”

“She is… I mean, she’s slim. But like… not too slim. Her body is proportionate… I mean, physically, anatomically… her shape is feminine…  and when I say “feminine” I mean she’s not malnourished…” I babble and the small apple tits appear in front of my eyes again, Jesus, I’ve started losing my sanity… For some reason, Mike feels necessary to grab the receiver and yell a gratuitous, cheesy tirade into it.

“My learned colleague is trying to say that she’s a very pretty young lady, with all the respect, of course. She’s the most virtuous girl I know, she behaves well, you can be proud of her, Mrs. Albertson.”

Yes, Mrs. Albertson, exactly, your grandchild behaves well, she brought condoms only enough for a whole fuckin’ football team, safety first… I snatch the receiver out of Mike’s hand and lift it back to my ear but before I could finally get rid of the old lady, the TV catches my attention. While we were listening to the phone call, the harmless playmate fantasies ended and the channel started airing hardcore porn. And either was the petting part very short or it didn’t even exist since the “characters” are pretty much in the middle of things and before we could react anything to avoid the disaster, the actress starts screaming rhythmically.

“What was that noise? Are women with you too?” the old woman inquires suspiciously.

“Turn down the volume, for fuck’s sake!!!” I scream-whisper to Mike.

“No, we’re alone, Mrs. Albertson… we’re just watching TV… Murder She Wrote, someone is being killed!” Mike improvises aggressively poking the remote. “It’s not working…” he groans with a miserable expression.

“Oh, I like that show… which episode? Maybe I turn on the TV to watch it too...”

If you knew… In the meantime the man starts moaning too so the obvious noises grow even louder.

“Oh, the murderer is being killed too!” I try to win some time for Mike, I admit, it wasn’t the most creative lie I’ve ever said…

“I’m saying it’s not working, it must be contact failure or low battery…” he explains beating the remote against his palm at full strength, creating a counterpart to the sound of the bodies snapping against each other on the screen.

“It’s the episode about the slasher.” I maintain the conversation and then address Mike again. “Then use the power button on the TV device or throw it the fuck out of the window, I don’t care, just do something!!!”

“Ah, great idea!” his face lights up and finally, he walks to the TV and turns it off. I swear, I thought for a second he was going to choose the window version, like Keith Moon. I’m sure he was considering it but found the box too heavy.

“It’s over…“ I transmit to Mrs. Albertson.

“It ended with a cliffhanger, what a shame…” Mike remarks and I can barely suppress my snorts.

“I hope for a happy ending…” I grin, Mike presses his pillow against his face, while the poor lady obviously doesn’t even know what to say. After a few seconds of silent, body-shaking laughter, he rearranges his face muscles and takes the receiver away from me.

“It was a pleasure to meet to you, Mrs. Albertson. Judy is a great girl and as far as we know, Effie too, please, hug her for us. I hope we can meet you in person too, when we get back.”

“I admit, I’m relieved, I want you to know I think you are just darling guys. And now, I call the Notre Dame Hunchbach, as I intended to. Goodnight, Mr. Gossard, Mr. McCready.”

“Goodnight, Mrs. Albertson.” we sing in unison.

After I hang up the phone, we stare at each other silently for long moments, before we burst out laughing hysterically.

***

Great. She’s late. She promised she’d be waiting for me at the bar counter at 9 p.m. I’m doing the third circle in this goddamn place and she’s nowhere to be found. Okay, RCKNDY is actually my favorite place and I was happy when Krisha offered to meet me here to unveil Kelly’s and Susan’s “great idea” about which I only know at this moment that it concerns my photos. The cigarette smoke irritates my throat and some unknown band is in the middle of sound check on the stage, the indistinct guitar noises and the female lead singer’s instructions blast at random moments from the speakers causing me mild heart attack every single time and making the crowd members overyell them. Despite the early hour, the place is packed; I can barely struggle through the mass of flannel-wearing guys and girls. Early hour… what am I talking… now that my lifestyle converges on clinical death, both metaphorically and literally, I usually spend my evenings in front of the TV wearing my pajamas. It’s good Krisha picked this day, Mom is working at that new side job again so I didn’t have to make anything up to prevent her from asking suspicious questions.

I visited the restroom to kill some time but it just made me frustrated all the more since I involuntarily became the audience of a bunch of girls, one of them was gushing about the kissing skills of her current crush… gah, I can’t believe I turned into this sour bitch, just because I’ll end up as a spinster, she’s entitled to have some fun…

Almost fifteen minutes have passed by and she still hasn’t shown up yet. I can’t hang out with Victor either, he’s helping with putting the finishing touches at the sound check. I guess I have to wait then. I pick a bar stool and try to decipher the list of beverages on the wall.

“What can I get for you?” a red-haired bartender girl asks. Her question catches me off-guard, since my good old answer “beer” hasn’t been an option for a while and I didn’t have enough time to consider the alternatives. She’s chewing gum with a bored face, reminding me of a ruminant… a hot ruminant.

“Uhm… I… ugh, I haven’t…” I jabber and she reacts with an impatient eyeroll, the countless bracelets are clinking around her wrist as she runs her fingers through her red mane.

“I’d like to have a virgin mojito.” I utter the first thing that comes to mind. She acknowledges my choice with a scornful scoff… Yeah, in case I haven’t felt embarrassed enough yet, she makes obvious that she’s the sexy and cool femme fatale and I’m a straight-edge cripple in a boring, worn, brown jacket.

“Hey, here you are!” someone grabs my shoulders.

“Me? I’ve been waiting for you for like… hours?” I frown while Krisha settles down on the bar stool next to me and places her beer on the counter.

“Gosh, sorry!” her eyes pop as she checks her wristwatch. “I arrived too early and went to the executive office to meet a few friends.” she points at some people talking in front of a door that probably belongs to the office rooms. “That’s Alex, he runs this place, he’s a good friend of Stone, by the way. And that girl next to him works here too, she’s the girlfriend of Regan.”

I observe the girl she’s talking about, she has a nice, bright smile. Fantastic. Krisha knows everyone here… and I have no idea who these people are, and by the way, I’m nobody.

“Regan?” I furrow my eyebrows. “It’s a unique name, I swear I’ve heard it but I can’t place it…”

“He’s also an old friend of mine. And of Stone of course. You might know his name because he played in Malfunkshun with Andy. I mean Andy Wood.”

“Wood.” we say the name at once. “Of course I know his name, I didn’t grow up in a cave…” I explain, maybe in a sharper tone than intended.

“Oookay… “ she raises both hands defensively. “Actually, Regan almost became the drummer of Mother Love Bone, until they replaced him with Greg Gilmore. They made Stone fire him, I was thinking “okay, that’s it, he’s gonna hate us forever” but somehow, he managed to convince him by using logical reasons. If you ever want to fire a drummer, just call him because he’s your guy.” she nods meaningfully and takes a sip of her beer.

“Based on my sister’s opinion, drummers probably leave the band willingly, after having spent some time with him.” I remark dryly. “Thank you.” I reach for my drink and slide the money towards the phlegmatic redhead. I suppress a smile when I see her realizing with disappointed face that I spared the tip. What was she thinking, seriously?

“Oh yes, I forgot your sister and you sew Stone-shaped voodoo dolls in your spare time. By the way, Regan has played with a guy called Shawn for a few years, he’s a huge talent. The dude is a Prince-freak, which is somehow odd in a city where you can’t make a single step without stomping on a distortion pedal but he’s an awesome singer. AND they are planning to jam with Stone as soon as he gets back. I can give you the address of their rehearsal room in case you want to assassinate him…”

“No, thanks, I already know where he lives so…”

“Right!” she slaps herself in the forehead.

“Anyway, can I finally learn why we’re here?”

“Soon. We’re waiting for someone… I’m going to introduce you to someone… who has a job offer for you!”

“Wow… let me guess… healthcare branch has discovered me and they want me to be the face of some firm’s dialyzer portfolio?” I squint at her as I loudly slurp my cocktail.

“Damn, you nailed it!” she bangs her fist against the counter. “Anyway, I’m not going to tell you anything until she arrives, you need to be punished for the self-deprecating joke.”

“Spank me…” I mumble but my retort stays unnoticed since Krisha stares in an indefinite direction next to me sending an enthusiastic wave towards someone.

“Look, Jer is here too.” she points at the target of her smile and I follow her gaze only to recognize Jerry Cantrell… he’s wearing black jeans and a black leather jacket with a white tee.

“Wait… didn’t… didn’t you mention… I mean, you dated, didn’t you?” I ask confused, trying to form coherent sentences. It’s not going well.

“Yeah, we did.” she wiggles her eyebrows.

“But exes are supposed to hate each other…” I try not to turn around too obviously, so I remove a non-existing hair from the shoulder part of my jacket. While he’s slowly walking through the crowd, I notice he’s holding hands with a long, brown-haired girl. She has a perfect body and she’s probably completely aware of it since the tight leather pants highlight every curves of her. Sure, a 10/10 chick for a 10/10 guy, that’s how world has always worked… His hair is let down… I catch myself smiling, Dad insisted on calling him Rapunzel…

“It was just a summer fling and we realized after a few dates that we weren’t made for each other. So no one got hurt.” she shrugs. “Anyway, we share the building with the management of Alice in Chains so we knew we would run into each other all the time. The music scene of this city it’s like a big, incestuous family so…”

We both crack up.

“Oh no…” she sighs annoyed, staring over me again. I don’t know what’s going on in her head but it must have to do something with another twenty-eight people I’ve never met. “DON’T TURN AROUND!” she yells at me when I try to check the cause of her reaction.

“Why, what’s…?”

“It’s too late, I guess she’s already noticed us… or hasn’t she? Bow your head…” she leans on the counter, letting her hair cover her face.

“What the fuck?”

“I said bow your head… avoid eye contact… shit, I don’t have the nerves for this right now…”

“Krisha? Oh my god, it’s you, I haven’t seen you for ages!” I hear a powerful female voice from behind my back.

“Oh, hi Amber, it’s nice to see you!” Krisha groans with a painful smile, lifting her head and letting herself be pulled in a half-embrace resigned. I have to bite my lips to prevent myself from giggling since she sends a cross-eyed grimace to me over the girl’s shoulder. So she must be Stone’s Amber.

“Hey, are you here with your little friend?”

And that must be me. I involuntarily straighten up as much as I can but despite the high bar stool, I’m still shorter than her in her heels. I wonder if Red peed into these ones too… Now that I’m checking her out properly, I realize somehow she doesn’t belong here. Mini dress, heels, perfect makeup… That’d be Stone’s type?

“Uhm, this is Effie, she’s the sister of the band’s new monitor engineer…”

“Ah, Julie, you see, I know everything…” she knocks on his temple with her index finger a few times. “I’m Stoney’s girlfriend.” she grabs my hand and shakes it aggressively. I don’t correct her, I just exchange a quick look with Krisha, her eyes confirm that it wouldn’t make sense anyway.

“And… are you going to stay for the gig too?” Krisha nods towards the stage after a few moments of awkward silence.

“Oh, no, I’m going partying with my girls, I just checked in, I wanted to say hi to Alex and ask him for a favor. We’re organizing a grunge-themed fashion show and this place would be a perfect place for it.”

“A what?”

Krisha’s face radiates shock and disgust at the same time.

“You know, this grunge thing is blowing up, the firm is about to launch a collection, you know, flannel shirts, jackets, shorts with leggings, so we’re looking for a grungy place to present it…” she explains with huge hand moves. As she begins to explain the details of her brilliant idea, I get immediately distracted. Not only because my mind is desperately trying to ignore this nonsense but because I spot Leather Pants Chick at the same sport were Alex and his colleague were standing a few minutes ago. Only a few seconds pass by until her partner arrives too, he immediately pulls her closer by her hips as he leans against the wall… they engage into a make-out session without hesitation. Jerry digs his fingers into her hair and as things are getting more intense, his hands slowly wander along her back until they reach and firmly grab their destination…

I swear it wasn’t so hot in here when I arrived, I can feel my face is burning, I’m sweating like I was in hell… Yeah, being forced to watch a hot guy smooching with a girl who isn’t you but in exchange, is much prettier than you, that’s how I imagine the first circle of hell. I can barely peel myself out of my jacket, my elbow gets stuck when Amber grabs its sleeve. I’m still a little dazed-off and stare at her expressionlessly while I’m trying to pick up the threads of conversation.

“...exactly like this one, thrift clothes are so trendy now, where did you get this one?”

She shakes the sleeve of my jacket impatiently, making me realize that’s what she’s talking about. Should I tell her the truth? That it’s not from a thrift shop, that it’s original, that Judy and I pooled the money we earned at our summer jobs together and made an agreement about taking turns on wearing it six years ago?

“I can’t… can’t remember…” I manage an effortless answer.

“You have a great taste, we three should do a thrift store tour together.” she rants on.

“Totally.” Krisha tries to seem enthusiastic but she rather reminds me of a snarling serial killer.

“Okay, I have to go, oh my god, I’m late and I haven’t even talked to Alex. We could hang out in the city next week, call me, Krish! And bring your new friend too!” she winks at me. “See you, later girls!” she finally leaves us alone, the quick tapping of heels echoes in my head even after she has disappeared behind the office door. Krisha grabs her glass and drinks its content for one sip.

“Ah, I feel much better now.” she sighs. “I’m afraid my phone is about to die. I may not be able to make phone calls for a while.”

I snort into my drink.

“I must say, she’s not the girl I’d imagine as Stone’s girlfriend.”

“Trust me, she’s not the girl whom anyone would imagine as his girlfriend. But seeing them together is always like a free circus ticket, it’s pretty funny, especially when you have coke and popcorn too.”

“Sooo… where’s the mysterious person who we’re waiting for?” I look around, although I have no clue what physical characteristics I should look for, I don’t even know if we’re talking about a man or a woman. As my gaze slowly wanders around the room, I admit to myself unwillingly, that I exactly know what I’m looking for. Long, blonde hair, black leather jacket and a white shirt. The realization makes me blush, I feel like in those good old high school days, trying to casually encounter my current crush who doesn’t even know I exist. Why am I like this all the time? Why? I’m such an idiot…

“Okay, I check Alex’s office, maybe we misunderstood each other and she went in without me noticing her. And I’m sure Alex needs some spiritual support too, the recovery will be tough for him. Do you wanna come?”

“No, I… I’d rather wait here.” I answer quickly, flushing, I’m stupid, stupid, stupid… “So it’s a she?” I shout after Krisha but she just waves me off laughing.

So… what was I thinking? I could have join her and meet her cool friends but I chose to drink here alone, not that I don’t feel lonely enough. And I ran out of drink in the meantime too… I want to procrastinate the next round until the other, friendlier bartender shows up again but unfortunately, the red-haired demon spots my empty glass and elbows on the counter opposite me with a challenging, patronizing smile.

“May I bring you a next lemonade?”

I’m about to snap back but a pleasant male voice over my head makes me change my mind.

“One more of this, whatever it is. And the lady is my guest.”

[smkkbert]

Time for a story - So it begins

To read before:  Present tense & Missing

Thea and Roy were the last to arrive to the bunker. Roy was holding the sleeping Robbie cradled against his chest. Thea, who was seven months pregnant now, was holding a hand to her baby bump. The slow movements of her fingers told Oliver that she could feel her baby, his nephew, kicking at the excitement of this nightly trip.

As soon as Thea had taken the few steps up onto the platform where Felicity’s work space usually was, she crossed the distance towards Oliver. Straightening up on the tip of her toes, she wrapped her arms around his neck and put a hand to the back of his head.

“We will find her, Ollie,” she promised with whispered voice, soothing him, “of course we will find her.”

Oliver put his arms around Thea’s waist and tried to believe in her words. He wanted to believe that she was right. He wanted to believe in that spark of hope that she offered, but he just couldn’t do it.

While they were still hugging, he looked at the team that he had to help him find Felicity. Thea and Roy were his legal family. John and Lyla were his family by heart. John had been the first person to join his team. He was his best friend, and the person he trusted more. He was the one who would have to lead this operation because he was calmer and more focused than Oliver could be, especially given the situation at hand. Nick was Felicity’s – and through that – his family too. He wasn’t exactly stable yet, but he was skilled, and he’d do everything necessary to save Felicity. When it all went down, Oliver trusted Nick to follow him in the most dangerous darkness to save Felicity.

Fact was that the entire team was family. People who went through the shit that they had been put through and continued to go through it again and again every single night they went out into the field for years either became enemies or family. Oliver was lucky enough to call the people around him family.

They’d be complete if Tommy and Laurel were there too, but they had gone on vacation three days ago. Tommy had wanted to escape his day of death. It was still so traumatizing for him that it was hard for him to live through it. Taking his wife to some lonely place where they could be all alone and he could let himself fall and be caught by her was what he needed. Oliver got that. He often felt the same way about his trauma.

Oliver tightened his arms around Thea’s waist once more before he let go of her. He took a step back and flashed her a sad smile. It was meant to soothe her the way that she had tried to soothe him and tell her that he was doing okay – as okay as possible given the circumstances – but he guessed that it looked so pathetic that it wasn’t believable at all.

While Thea stepped back towards Roy, who put his free hand to the small of her back and rubbed it over the probably aching part of her muscles, Oliver looked around the faces of the people around him. His fingers tightened around the banister around him.

“Thank you all for coming here. I know that-“

“Spare yourself the breath, Oliver,” John interrupted him softly and shook his head, “because, as far as I got it, we don’t have a lot of time. What about Felicity?”

Oliver sucked in a deep breath, grateful that he got to skip the general rules of politeness. After the island, he had felt like he had forgotten all about those rules the same way he had felt unable to participate in small talk or anything like that. Felicity had taught him to adapt to more normal standards, but sometimes it was still hard to remember it.

“William Tockman got her.”

“Tockman?” Roy frowned. “Should I know who that is?”

“He calls himself the Clock King. Sara, John, Felicity and I know him. He hired two criminals to steal something from Kord Enterprise and killed one of them for killing a guard. Later, he hired others to steal money from the Starling National Bank. We set him up, so he broke into another agency of Starling National. That is where we took her down, well, Felicity did.”

“So he wants revenge,” Dominic concluded and crossed her arms in front of her chest, “and he wants to wreak revenge on Felicity the most which is not good news.”

Oliver nodded his head though he felt every muscle in his body tensing once more. He knew what Lyla meant. There was no good reason why Tockman would want Oliver to find Felicity alive. Her death would certainly suit him much more, at least unless he was going to kill him in front of her eyes.

“Tockman is playing a game.” Oliver gestured to the traces that he had found already. “He sent me the countdown. That’s the time I have to find Felicity. It started at forty-eight hours and went down since I opened the gift box it was wrapped in.”

Forty-one hours and thirty-four minutes were left, and it continued to run out right in front of his eyes. There was nothing he could to to stop it, and it already felt like it was too little time to succeed.

“He said we will start where we finished the last time, so I drove to the bank and found that tablet in my private box. It allows me to see Felicity, but I can’t contact her.”

“May I check?”

Oliver grabbed the tablet and put it onto Lyla’s hand willingly. He knew that through her job at A.R.G.U.S. she had a lot of hidden talents and a lot of resources. From the computers here, Felicity had given herself access to these abilities, and Lyla knew that too. She linked the tablet with Felicity’s system and started working her way through the almost child-proof system. Still, she’d probably be more successful than Oliver would have been.

“He said that there are rewards to be unlock if I follow the right traces, but they will be taken away if I take the wrong traces.” He sucked in a deep breath. “And I am not allowed to get myself any help to do this. It was meant to be a one-on-one. Calling you and telling you everything about this wasn’t a light choice to make because it might cost me the person I love and need most in this world. I just know that Felicity ”

Saying that made his chest felt heavy because it reminded him once more what risk he had taking by calling John. Given what was on the line for him, he shouldn’t have been able to contact him. If it hadn’t been for the fact that he knew how much Felicity had always said that they needed to trust in their friends and needed to trust in the joint effort of the team, she wouldn’t have contacted them.

Oliver could see his family and friends sharing meaningful looks. They knew how much it must have taken from him to call them. He had always done things alone and, even though he had gotten offers for help from people he had felt he could trust a lot of times, he hadn’t been able to take those offers. He had just been too used to doing things alone, and deep in his bones he had still believed that the only person he could trust was himself. That was how it always had been after all.

“We need to find Felicity,” Oliver said, “and, to do so, we need to find the next clues. The tablet was the last thing that I got from Tockman, so it has to lead to some new traces. The tablet has to be the key to the next trace.”

Dominic nodded and stepped right behind Lyla. Looking over her shoulder, he tried to follow the codes she went through. The way he narrowed his eyes at what he was seeing at the screen told Oliver that he had no idea what he was seeing there. Felicity had often joked that Roy really didn’t get the way tech worked at all although he did very well at trying to cover it by sounding smart and like he knew his way around a computer.

“A.R.G.U.S. would be a great help with this.” Lyla sighed while her fingers moved on the keyboard. Others would probably say they were moving quickly, but since Oliver had memorized the clattering sound of Felicity’s fingers dancing over the keyboard, he knew it was rather slow compared to her. The comparison wasn’t exactly fair though as Felicity had been behind computers for years, and it had been exactly where she had wanted to be. “My experts in IT know their way around a computer much better than I do and-“

“I don’t trust A.R.G.U.S.”

“I basically am A.R.G.U.S.,” Lyla replied almost a little sharply, turning around in Felicity’s chair and looking at Oliver urgently, “because I ran background checks on them. They all came back okay. I also interviewed them to test their psych. I made sure that everyone working for A.R.G.U.S. is fit and trustworthy of the job. I was very thorough in choosing what agents had to go and what could stay. I trust everyone working for A.R.G.U.S. because they have been chosen thoroughly.”

Oliver knew that Lyla was saying the truth. She was a good friend of Felicity and him. She knew how much they meant to John. She wouldn’t keep it a secret if she had even the slightest doubt about this. If there was a mole within her team, she would say it because

“You are a part of that agency which is not the same as being A.R.G.U.S.,” Oliver countered, “which is why I trust you, but I don’t trust your agents. I don’t trust them with anything that affects my missions, and I definitely don’t trust them with my wife’s life. It’s Felicity.”

He knew that he could trust Lyla because she had become part of this family a long time ago. She had supported Felicity when she had needed it the most, and she offered her services to the team a lot of times too. Still, given the history that he shared with A.R.G.U.S., Oliver couldn’t trust that institution. He knew how it worked, and he knew that he wanted no part in it if it was avoidable.

“There are too many people involved in this as it is.” Oliver sighed. He knew that a fight was the last thing he needed right now. “I don’t want to risk even more by asking for more people to help.”

Lyla knew that he was just soothing her. Oliver could see in her eyes that she knew. Instead of saying anything, she just nodded her head and turned back to the computers though. After all, she knew as well as he did that this wasn’t the right time to pick up a discussion about whether or not A.R.G.U.S. was trustworthy.

Oliver’s eyes found the countdown once more, and he felt his heart aching in his chest. He was looking on life a lot more positively now than he had a couple of years ago, but he was still a realist. Chasing criminals on the street was much easier than playing the games of some psycho. He wasn’t the one in charge here.

In the latter half of his life so far, Oliver had experienced a lot of loss. Every single one had taken a part of his soul. For years, he had been walking around like a ghost, really being a shell of a body more than anything else. That was what happened when the people you cared about were ripped from your life, and it was completely out of your control.

With how helpless and out of control he had felt with every time someone he loved had died, Oliver guessed it was no surprise that he had turned into a control freak. Like so many of his symptoms, it had become better with time, but he still had trouble sometimes. During family walks, he always needed his kids to stay somewhere close. He always needed to know where they were. It made him nervous when he couldn’t see them.

Losing the people that you loved the way he had lost them did that to people.

“I need a phone.”

His words seemed to surprise the people around him. He didn’t care to explain to them that he didn’t want to use his phone in case Tockman would call him. With a single look he told everyone that he was serious and held out his hand. Immediately, everyone reached into the pocket of their pants and held their phones out for him. Thea was the first to put her phone into his hand, so Oliver took it.

“What are you doing?” John asked.

“There is someone that I have to call.”

“Curtis?” Thea asked. “That’s probably a good idea. Felicity was the one who invited him in on the team in the first place to replace her and-“

“It’s not Curtis.”

Oliver wondered if he should call Curtis. While he had indeed jumped in a couple of times when Felicity had been unavailable and he had actually been a regular part of the team since they had divided it into two shifts, for some reason Oliver just didn’t consider him a close part of this family. Maybe it was because, other than Arrow operations and QI occasions, there were barely any touch points between them. Maybe it wasn’t fair not to call Curtis, but he really was Oliver’s last priority right now, and he actually wasn’t sure enough if he could trust the bubbly man to keep a secret like this.

John frowned when Oliver stated dialing the number. Oliver only saw it from the corner of his eye, but he lifted his gaze to his friend nonetheless. His thumb was already hovering over the green receiver.

“I need to call Bruce.”

A couple of years ago, these words would have surprised Oliver himself, but not anymore. He had grown a lot through the years and he had learned to understand people as well as people’s feelings a lot better. Understanding a person that was in love with Felicity was the easiest.

“If the situation was the other way around, and he was the one married to Felicity, while I was hopelessly in love with her, I would want to know.” Oliver pressed the green receiver. “Bruce deserves to know.”

It didn’t take long for Bruce to take the call. He didn’t say a word though, probably suspicious as he wasn’t sure who war calling. Oliver doubted that he had saved Thea’s number. Just like Oliver himself, Bruce knew that an unknown caller usually meant that there was trouble as only a handful of people had access to their phone numbers.

“Bruce, it’s me. Oliver.”

There was only a beat of silence, barely longer than the beat of a heart. As short as the moment of silence was, it still weighed heavy. Bruce had experienced as much pain as Oliver had in his life. Maybe his pain and his experience had been different, but it had taken him to the same point it had taken Oliver eventually.

“What happened?”

“William Tockman aka the Clock King took Felicity. He gave me two days to find her and, although I know it’s against the rules, I think a group effort is our best chance.”

“I will be in Starling before sunrise.”

Oliver nodded his head when Bruce had already hung up. He was glad that Bruce was coming here. They could need the help, and he offered the right expertise for this battle with Tockman. If someone aside from Felicity could fight him, it was Bruce.

“I might have found something.”

Quickly, Oliver handed his phone back to Thea and stepped behind Lyla, who was skimming through a folder full of music files.

“What did you find?”

“Well, to be completely true here, Felicity’s security check found it. The folder has been hidden and was secured, but the system basically found and unlocked it all by itself thanks to Felicity’s preinstalled routine mechanisms.”

So Felicity was probably going to find herself at the end and lead them right towards her, so they could get them out of wherever she was held captive. Felicity had learned early to save herself.

“What files are there?”

“They are all music files. Apparently, they belong to different albums of a band that’s called Mortician.”

“How is that going to help us?” Thea asked and stepped next to Oliver. “It has to be a new trace, but where is it supposed to take us?”

“I looked at the files a little bit more thoroughly.” Lyla shot a brief look back over her shoulder before she turned back to the monitors. “The song that was most listened to is called Zombie Apocalypse. I looked for any connections between that and Tockman or the song and Starling City. Apparently, a horror movie with the same title has filmed some scenes around here. On the property of a local mortician.”

“That’s where I will start my search for the next trace.”

“I’ll come with you.”

Roy already turned to follow Oliver, but he shot a look back over his shoulder and shook his head. It might have looked weak, but it made Roy stop nonetheless.

“No,” he said, “I will go alone in case Tockman observes me.”

He had risked enough as it was. He couldn’t go a step further. If Tockman saw him with anyone of the team, he would know that Oliver had broken the rules. Maybe he knew already. Oliver hoped that wasn’t true, but it was possible. He just couldn’t allow himself to think about that.

 → → → → →

Since it took him more than an hour to get to his destination, less than forty hours were left to find Felicity by the time that Oliver arrived at the morticians. Although it was still the middle of the night – something he had only realized once he had arrived at the building – there was light behind one of the windows. Apparently, someone was working a nightshift or something.

Oliver went to the door and knocked at it firmly. Maybe the light had only been left switched on by accident, but Oliver really couldn’t care less right now. He had an excuse to say why he had knocked at the door so late, but he wouldn’t care if he woke up anyone.

It didn’t take too long before the door was opened. An elder man with glassy eyes and tousled hair was looking at Oliver over the rim of his glasses. Before Oliver could say anything though, he nodded his head with a long sigh and beckoned him to come in.

With a quick, suspicious look around Oliver tried to find out if there was anyone watching him. Since he got the impression that he had been expected, he wondered if Tockman was somewhere around here. Even if he wasn’t, he certainly had been here or had sent someone to come here and announce that he was going to come here.

This was the right trace. Oliver could feel it.

Oliver stepped into the house carefully, already taking a thorough look around. This might be a trap, one of those wrong traces after all. His feeling might betray him. It had happened before after all.

“Come on,” the man that had opened the door for him said, “I will show you the coffins.”

“Thanks,” Oliver said after a brief moment of hesitation, “that’s exactly what I intended to see.”

He had no idea what game exactly was being played here, but he guessed that playing along was his best choice for now. At least that was he wasn’t dismissed just yet.

“I know.”

The man sighed, looking at Oliver for a long moment. He looked him up and down thoroughly, taking him in and judging him for sure. He looked at him like he thought very little of him. As the mayor, Oliver was used to that. He was used to people thinking little of him because of the political decisions he had made. There was something else here though. Oliver could feel it.

“I am sorry for the late visit.”

He had to feel a way into this conversation. He had to find out what exactly was being placed here without losing his chance of finding the next trace. It was close. He could feel it. He couldn’t risk losing it.

“I knew what I was getting myself into when I agreed to do this.” The man sighed once more. “Luckily, I wasn’t paid that badly, so I guess it’s okay.”

Oliver nodded his head, unsure wat he could say to that. He still wasn’t sure if all of this was right or a trap or whatever.

“I voted for you by the way.”

“Thank you.”

“I have to admit that I am not sure I would have done it if I had known that you were taking part in scavenger hunts.” He stepped into what looked like a showroom for coffins and turned around to Oliver. With his arms crossed in front of his chest, he looked at Oliver almost a little dismissively. “I thought your days of being a spoilt bachelor were over.”

A scavenger hunt. That was what he believed was happening here.

“They actually are over. I was persuaded into joining.”

The mortician just nodded his head, looking Oliver up and down once more. If Oliver had to bet, he’d say that he wasn’t going to vote him next time. He didn’t care, at least not right now.

Oliver shot a look at his watch. He didn’t have time for long conversations. He needed to get onto Tockman’s track.

“I guess your time is precious since you want to find your friend.”

Again, the mortician sighed. Turning away, he opened one of the coffins and reached inside. When he turned back around, he held out a USB drive for Oliver. Taking it, Oliver turned the little device between his fingers.

“Your friend asked me to tell you something.”

Oliver perked up his eyebrows and felt his heart skipping a beat. Maybe the message in combination with whatever was on the USB drive would take him a step closer to Felicity.

“What did he say?”

“He said The dead are always trying to convince me how comfortable their coffins are.” He made a brief pause. “He also asked me to offer you to test the comfortability of one of my coffins. He said you might have a thing for playing with death.”

Oliver looked at the coffins intently, wondering what exactly this was supposed to mean. Was it just a little joke Tockman was making or was there some deeper meaning to it? Was it maybe a wrong trace to follow?

Pressing his lips together tightly, Oliver sucked in a deep breath. He would need to know what was on the USB drive and also have the whole effort of the team to help him put the pieces together.

“Not tonight,” he said and tightened his fingers around the USB drive, “but thank you for your offer and for everything.”

With that, he turned around and left the house, hoping that these next clues were helping him to find out more.

 → → → → →

 Thirty-eight hours and less than fifty minutes were left by the time that Oliver arrived back in the bunker. The moment he stepped into the dark, he lifted the USB drive.

“I have something.”

Everyone, including Bruce who was sitting in Felicity’s chair, his fingers dancing over the keyboard as quickly as Felicity’s usually did, turned around to him. Oliver wondered briefly if he should be surprised that Bruce was here already. A flight from Gotham took a lot longer than two hours. With how crazy the world they were living in could be, Oliver was sure that he had found a way to make this work though.

“I will check that,” Bruce said and lifted a hand to catch the USB drive when Oliver threw it in his direction, “and meanwhile you will tell me the entire story from the beginning. I need to know everything. Every little detail. Maybe there is something you missed or something you- I don’t know. Maybe there is just something.”

Oliver nodded his head. He grabbed the tablet he had found in his private box and pushed the button to see Felicity. She threw her head to the side, a sob falling from her lips. Oliver couldn’t hear it, but the sound echoed through his head nonetheless. And it broke his heart.

“Oliver.”

Bruce’s harsh voice made Oliver hug the tablet to his chest before he looked at the one man who loved Felicity as much as he himself did. He wasn’t looking back at him though. Instead, his eyes were glued to the monitor as he was already trying to find out what exactly was saved on the USB-drive.

“Felicity took Tockman down a couple of years ago, using his own tech against him,” Oliver explained, his voice almost sounding numb as he lowered his eyes back to the tablet and the footage of Felicity he was receiving, “and he has been in prison for the last years. He broke out during the latest earthquake. Now he is holding Felicity captive and wants me to find her. He gave me forty-eight hours and even sent me a countdown, to make sure I know the exact time I have left. He said it was like some kind of game, and he set up some rules. The most important one is that I should find her alone. He says there will be consequences if I break any of the rules.”

“Then why did you call your team?”

From the corner of his eye, he could see Thea already taking in a breath to tell Bruce that Oliver had made the right call, but Oliver shook his head quickly. Bruce was still where Oliver had been a couple of years ago. He doubted people more than he trusted them, and when it came down to it, he would always decide to trust only himself over anyone else.

“Because I know it’s what Felicity would have wanted me to do,” Oliver explained, pushing the button to see Felicity once more, “because she knows that doing things alone never leads to the same success as trusting your friends. She was the one who convinced me that a team was what this city and what I would need for my wellbeing. She would want the team to be involved in here.”

“You should have called me and only me.”

Bruce’s voice was low, but Oliver could still hear the anger in it. There was nothing Oliver could possibly say to convince Bruce otherwise. He wasn’t ready to trust people in situations of crisis, and this was certainly one of the worst situations for Bruce given how much Felicity meant to him.

Who knew. Maybe Bruce was right, and Oliver should have just contacted Bruce. He could have easily erased all traces of their contact. Bruce had the skills necessary for that. It might have been the safer option, but they would certainly need a bumper between them eventually.

Tapping onto the little button of the tablet, Oliver lowered his eyes. For the first time, Felicity hadn’t slapped her hands in front of her face protectively. Still, she looked anything but happy or content with the way things were. Felicity looked exhausted. There were dark rings under her eyes that she had squeezed shut to protect them from the light. Her lips were dry, her skin pale.

Who knew what she was going through right now? She didn’t have much room which scared her as Oliver knew although it had become better. Did she have something to drink? Something to eat? Was she comfortable?

The dead are always trying to convince me how comfortable their coffins are.

As soon as the display went black, Oliver pushed the button once more. He needed to see Felicity alive. Who knew what was done to her when he couldn’t see her?

“Stop pushing that damn button. It hurts Felicity.”

Bruce’s harsh voice made Oliver lift his gaze and frown at him. Still, Bruce wasn’t looking back at him. He continued working on the computers, trying to figure out what clues the USB-drive were holding.

Oliver wanted to ask him how he knew that Felicity was being hurt, but deep down he already knew that Bruce was right. The glaring light was shining right into her face, probably blinding her as much as the reports’ flashlights always hurt Oliver. Given how close the light seemed to be to her face, it had to be even worse.

Sucking in a deep breath to breathe against the pain, Oliver put the tablet again and stepped behind Bruce.

“How is it going?”

“Give me a couple more minutes, and we will know what’s on the USB-drive. It’s encrypted well, but certainly not well enough. He encrypted this for you, not for me.”

Oliver didn’t doubt that.

“I have something to work on for the rest of you,” Oliver said, crossing his arms in front of his chest and turning around to the rest of the team, “because the mortician I have been to has delivered a message from Tockman. He said The dead are always trying to convince me how comfortable their coffins are. We need to find out what that means.”

While the others left the platform to discuss exactly that, Oliver stayed back with Bruce. He glanced towards the tablet again and again. His fingers were twitching with the urge to reach out for it, but Oliver didn’t dare to. He knew Bruce was right with his estimation. Felicity was only getting hurt through it.

Oliver just didn’t know what else he should do, and he hated not doing anything. It drove him crazy and-

“Got it.”

Immediately, Oliver was back behind Bruce. He looked over his shoulder at the monitor, trying to understand anything of the many numbers there.

“What is it?” he asked urgently. “Any new clue?”

“It’s a program for audio transmitting.”

Oliver frowned. “He sent me another message?”

“No, I think it’s the missing audio for the video footage of Felicity. The line is safe, so even if Tockman has access to the line, he can’t hear you know. It’s blocked.”

Oliver felt his heart skipping a beat before it started racing in his chest. He needed to talk to Felicity. He needed to assure her that he was going to find her. She probably knew that already because she had so much faith in him, but he wanted to tell her nonetheless.

Bruce pulled the USB-drive from the slot in the computer and held it out to Oliver. The expression in his eyes was so intense that Oliver barely dared to take the USB-drive from him. He could just see in Bruce’s eyes that he would love to keep it to himself. He needed to talk to Felicity as much as Oliver did, but he knew that this was a privilege that was all Oliver’s. At least for now.

“Tell Felicity that I am here and that we will find her.”

Nodding his head, Oliver took the USB-drive from him and whispered, “I will. And we will.”

While Oliver put the USB-drive to the tablet, Bruce left Felicity work station. Oliver sat back on the edge of the table and sucked in another deep breath. Closing his eyes, he cradled the tablet to his chest for a moment.

He knew that he had to get a hold on himself. Only if he had a hold on himself, he could be calm enough and assuring enough to make sure that Felicity believed him. He needed to be calm if he wanted to calm her down, and he wanted to calm her down. He wanted her to spend the next hours of her life, afraid that she was going to die in that cold hole she was captured in. He was going to find her, and he was going to hold her for hours until she was going to be okay eventually. Until they both were.

Breathing out slowly, Oliver brushed his thumb against the small button on the display.

“Felicity?”

 → → → → →

 “You’re still the one I run to / The one that I belong to.”

Felicity hadn’t been surprised when that song had come to her mind. It was kind of her and Oliver’s song although they had only chosen it rather lately. Oliver had woken up after a nightmare, and they had danced to that song in their bedroom. Listening to the lyrics, they had decided that it was their song.

“You’re still the one I want for life / You’re still the one that I love / The only one I dream of / You’re still the one I kiss goodnight / Ain’t nothing better.”

After everything they had been through together and despite the uncertainty of what else they would have to go through in the future, they had known that they would always be the one for each other. There would never be anyone else because nobody could possibly understand them as well as they understood each other.

“You’re still the one I want for life / You’re still the one that I love / The only one I dream of / You’re still the one I kiss goodnight.”

Although she had told Oliver that she was going to take care of everything, she was sure that he had set up everything romantically, so they could fully enjoy the evening together. This song had probably been played on repeat for hours already, and he would have still insisted on continuing to listen to it.

Oliver was a giant sap, no matter how much he tried to hide it from anyone but her. He was her giant sap, and she wouldn’t want it any other way.

“Ain’t nothing better / We beat the odds together / I’m glad we didn’t listen / Look at that we would be missin’.”

God, they would both miss so much if they hadn’t given into their feelings. They were both happier than they had ever been in their lives. Without each other, everything in their lives would be different. Maybe they’d still be happy, but their lives wouldn’t be full.

Felicity squeezed her eyes shut, feeling a single tear running down her cheek.

She might not see or speak to Oliver again. She could never tell him how much he had enriched her life and how much happiness and stability he had brought into it. She could never tell him how much she really loved him.

Maybe he knew it already, he probably did, but she needed to tell him again. She needed it to be the last thing she told him. Otherwise, she would never be sure.

There were always so much things more that she needed to tell him. There were things that he needed to tell their kids. She needed them to know some things, things she had thought she could tell them later on. Since there wasn’t necessarily a later on, she might have to tell Oliver to tell them one day and-

The glaring light was switched on once more. The heat seemed to drill itself into her skin. It hurt everywhere, feeling like a fire being held close to her face.

“Felicity?”

A sob that had been sticking in her throat the entire time since she had woken up in this little cage or whatever she was in.

“Oliver.”

She didn’t have to ask. She’d recognize his voice in a pool of a thousand voices. Even through his voice modulator she’d be able to recognize him by now. She just knew him so well, and she’d recognize him through every costume he could possibly put on.

“Hey.”

His voice was soft, but Felicity could hear the tears in his voice, and it made tears streaming down her face now too. Although she had been and still was so sure that Oliver would find her eventually, she was scared about being locked into this tiny thing in the dark. All of this was so very scary, and that made her weak.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he said quickly, his voice still lowered to a whisper, “don’t cry. I will find you, okay? I don’t know where you are yet, but I will find you and-“

“Oliver.”

His name fell from her lips in a sob. For the break of a second, she felt all those words she had been thinking about for the past minute threatening to fall from her lips. She knew that those words would be a goodbye and a sign that she didn’t believe Oliver would find her eventually, and that wouldn’t be fair. Oliver would try everything he could to find her. No matter how much it took.

“I will find you,” Oliver repeated, his voice more convincing now, “we will find you.”

“You called the team.”

A sigh of relief fell from her lips, not because she doubted that he couldn’t find her on his own, but because she knew that it must have taken a lot from him to trust anyone with what had happened. What exactly had happened though?

“Yes, I called them,” Oliver told her, “although Tockman told me not to.”

“It was the right choice.”

“I know you’d say this.” Oliver sighed. “Which is why I called them and Bruce. Together, we are a good team. We will find you. I promise you.”

“I know,” Felicity whispered closing her eyes once more, “I know you will find me.”

She really knew. Whatever thoughts she had had before had just been symptoms of how bad she felt locked up in this dark. Now that she could hear Oliver’s voice, those thoughts felt completely irrelevant because Oliver was going to find her, no matter what her dark thoughts were trying to tell her.

Everything was going to be okay. She knew that now more than ever. She was going to be back with Oliver and her kids soon because he would save her. She knew he would.

“Are you okay?” Oliver added eventually. “Did Tockman hurt you?”

“No.” Felicity shook her head and took in a sniffling breath. She quickly wiped away the tears from her cheeks. “He just took me and took me out. When I woke up, I was caged into a small, dark thing. I have no idea where I am.”

“I know,” Oliver whispered soothingly, “I can see you.”

Felicity frowned. “How?”

“There has to be a camera in there. Tockman sent me a tablet with the video footage, and we managed to unlock the audio just now. We can talk now.”

“Good.” Felicity nodded slowly. “So, it’s you who can switch on the light in here?”

“Yes, but I am trying to avoid it. I know it’s not pleasant and-“

“No, I- It’s a lot easier to bear it now that I know you are the one looking at me and not him.”

She imagined Tockman to sit behind his computers and watch her. He wanted her to suffer, but Felicity was sure that knowing she suffered alone wasn’t enough. He needed to see her. He needed to see how much she was suffering.

Although the light still prickled on her skin unpleasantly, at least now Felicity knew that it was Oliver thinking about her. She could imagine looking into his deep blue eyes and seeing his soft smile on his lips. It would comfort her in this cold and lonely darkness.

Closing her eyes, Felicity took some deep breaths and imagined right that. She felt her heartbeat slowing down immediately. Some of the panic that had spread in her veins in the last minutes or hours or days since she had been locked in here – there was no way she could keep a track of time here – faded. Oliver and the team would find her. Easily.

“Are you okay?”

“I am going to be,” Felicity promised, “how long have I been away yet?”

“Almost eleven hours since Tockman called me.”

Was that long or short? Felicity wasn’t sure.

“I have thirty-seven hours left to find you, but don’t worry. We have traces. We will-“

“I know,” Felicity whispered, “I know you will find me. I trust you, and I love you.”

“I love you too. So much.”

Felicity smiled softly, feeling his words wrap her into some gentle warmth that seemed to fill her from the inside as much as it covered her from the outside.

Everything was going to be okay. She just had to hold on for some hours more.

* * *

@fannaz​ @promiseyoullbepatientwithme​ @bytemegeekette​ @felicity-said-just-in-case​ @phanseptiic​ @orangeisorange​ @mspotatohead14​ @whentheheavenfades​ @emmaamelia95​ @smoakingskye​ @seaolicity​ @ourwritinginvein​ @1022bridgetp @felicityqueenforever​ @leagueofolicity17 @yryssss​ @myhauntedblacksoul​ @sherlock44​ @sinceriouslybea​ @olivyflavescentdeer​ @olicitys-castle​ @ofnothingcharming​ @vaelisamaza​ @smoakedandcharmed​ @alexisa1206​ @florence-bubbles​ @addictiontelly​ @queens-of-arrows-blog​ @memcjo​ @hysterical-for-joshifer-blog​ @oswinelevenforever​ @olicitylovemaking @bandanab310​ @mymusiclove101​ @lynslogic​ @scarletqueen23​ @olicityshipper19-blog​ @alex-wesley​ @arrows-4ever​ @unabashedlynerdypatrol​ @louehmysoul​ @ligiapimenta​ @chattyyana​ @charlie-leau​ @coal000​ @samcrowleys​ @ishippolivia​ @julianegomesqueen @malafle​ @miriam1779​ @charlinert​ @melaux​ @ontheolicityship​ @myshipperlife​ @wrightainsley @lexi9515​ @ladygreenwood​ @multi-fandom-crazy-fangirl​ @morinamel​ @mje-thomas​ @kebarry​ @canadianheartgirl​ @nannett2307​ @almondblossomme​ @kathrynelizabeth89​ @imdfabulous​ @mrt2501​ @arsipaci14​ @salasvia​ @brandis91​ @cainc3​ @morganmiguess @pr0fessi0nal-fangurl​ @iamisalima​ @nessafraan-blog​ @jonhdiggle​ @niki-is-amazing​ @universed-posts @hopeful-warrior​ @senoritaswiftie​ @bellemmie​ @green-arrows-of-karamel​ @iheartarrow​ @olicityovereverything​ @oliverfel4​ @olicity-in-the-heart​ @fullychippedcreation​ @geemarie​ @everything-but-normal-cat @myarroworld​ @tjmartinez​ @pleasantfanandstudent @j69confessional2​ @scentedcolorpirate​ @icanica74​ @tjmartinez98​ @certainmentalityface​ @tatianadamaceno @ryelew​ @wildwillowzepplin​ @missafairy​ @letsplaymurde-r​ @lipizette​ @positivepiper​ @nuttymilkshakehologram​ @laksagirl-blog​ @turnupthemusicandscream​ @pumpernickle93​ @onceuponanolicity​ @1106angel​ @jaspertown​ @fadinglands​ @morganashimi83​ @mochababychristy​ @omglovechrissie​ @mariejr88-blog​ @thetaufactor​ @onceuponanolicity​ @speakandseethetruth​ @bri206​ @aglasgo​ @geemarie​ @pineprincess​ @nerdgirljen​ @eternal-olicity14​ @allyouhadtodowas-stay-stay-stay​ @lovelycssefan​ @tsseract​ @flowerandsunshine​ @dcnmarvelgamergeek​ @blondeeoneexox @monetsmark​ @bb-olicity​ @mashamarty​ @rulerofsilence​ @erika-amber​ @nothingmorethanmyotps​ @kayleenyc​ @tonto16 @olicityfluv​ @olicitea1990 @haahaaa2408​ @pattid1​ @faegal04​ @24karatgem​ @wrldtravler​ @readerkas​ @olicity-beliver​ @greencoffeecups​ @snorlaxishere​ @sonothappening118

(If you want to be tagged or untagged, just let me know. :))

#arrow #olicity #olicity fic #olicity fanfic #time for a story

[jaskiers-sweetkiss]

Sunset Swerve - Part 6

Pairings: Luke x OC

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: light cursing

A/N: Day 6 of @jatp-week is favorite fanfic trope and since I’m a sucker for enemies to lovers here’s the next chapter of Sunset Swerve! We’re through episode 5 now. Some house keeping before you get into the chapter: song lyrics are italicized and the songs used in this chapter are Get Gone and Last Song by Thalia Mar. Idk why but the jatp soundtrack reminded me of her music so I figured why not make them Apollo 81 songs? Definitely recommend checking her out! As always, let me know what you think!

Part 5  Masterlist

___

“Where are they?” Julie paced backstage.

“They’ll be here any minute,” Jordan had reassured the girl last time she had asked. That had been nearly an hour ago and this time the ghost girl had no explanation for their absence.

She frowned as she considered what might be keeping the three ghost boys from their first gig. The only feasible explanation she could come up with was that they’d gotten what they needed from Willie’s friend and were currently confronting Bobby. The thought made her blood boil, that they would abandon the girls for revenge.

“I have no idea,” Jordan answered the pacing girl, “But I have an idea.” “Idea for what? Can you like summon them here or something?” Julie asked skeptically but at least she had stopped pacing.

“No.” Julie frowned. “But, I know a way Julie and the Phantoms can still perform. Well, Julie and the Phantom, singular.”

“We can’t perform without the guys, we need them for all our songs.”

“True,” Jordan admitted. “But there are some old songs I wrote with Apollo 81 that we could perform with just the two of us.”

“You want to learn a brand new set of songs and perform them tonight?” Julie questioned, crossing her arms and giving Jordan a look that clearly showed her disbelief.

“I already know the songs and you’re a freaking music prodigy, we can absolutely do it.” Jordan protested, “I’ll pop back to the studio to get my notebook and meet you in the band room, okay?”

Julie nodded, smiling at her in a way that told Jordan how crazy she thought she was.

Jordan appeared in the studio a moment later and quickly scrambled up the later to the loft, sifting through her left behind belongings for her old song notebook. She kept the most recent one on her at all times in her bag but it was filled with songs for a four-piece band, none of which she could rework in time for herself and Julie to perform. However, she knew somewhere in the loft there was a notebook of songs she and the girls had been working on just for fun, some of which could easily be performed by just the two of them.

She thrusted it into the air triumphantly when she finally found it in an old box with some Apollo 81 memorabilia.  She quickly poofed back to the school, landing on the piano bench next to Julie.

“Did you find it?” She asked after recovering from being startled by the ghost’s sudden appearance.

“Got it right here,” Jordan held up the notebook before flipping through the pages. “So I was thinking we could start with...”

Jordan walked Julie through her thought process on the setlist before they got to work. Just two songs to learn as fast as they could. They practiced for nearly an hour, Julie finally seeming comfortable enough with the lyrics and melodies to make it work when she got a text from Flynn.

“We should get out there,” Jordan said, moving to place a reassuring hand on her shoulder but forgetting that was impossible. “We’ve got this.”

Julie nodded, taking a deep breath before holding her head high and marching out of the band room. Jordan whooped excitedly as she followed behind her.

“Get ready cause Julie and the Phantoms are about to rock your socks off!” She called excitedly though she knew only Julie could hear her.

Julie shook her head, laughing at the girl’s outdated phrases.

“It’s eleven o’clock, you gotta perform,” Flynn said when they arrived backstage. “Even without the guys you’ll sound amazing.”

Julie smiled at the compliment.

“Don’t worry, Jordan and I have a plan.”

“You’re going on?” A voice asked from behind them and Julie froze.

Jordan cooed silently at how adorable the blond boy was, clearly caring about Julie and the band.

Julie nodded, though Jordan could see the nerves filling her again. Nick grinned from ear to ear before running out on stage.

“Guess what guys!” He exclaimed, grabbing Flynn’s microphone. “Julie fixed the hologram thing! Who’s ready for a show?”

The crowd erupted into cheers and Jordan grinned, starting to bounce on the balls of her feet as she felt the mix of nerves and adrenaline pumping through her body as it always did before a performance.

“Uh, hi,” Julie said, stepping onto the stage and accepting the mic from Nick.

“You’ve got this,” Jordan called out reassuringly and Julie took a breath, starting stronger.

“So, here’s the thing: even though we got the machine fixed, thanks to Nick,” she smiled at the boy and the crowd cheered, “I still can’t link up with all the guys, WiFi am I right?” She joked, gaining chuckles from a few people in the crowd.

“So, the shows going to look a little different tonight. It’s just me and Jordan, hope you don’t mind.” She smiled lightly and the crowd cheered while Jordan whooped again from behind her.

Flynn grinned at her best friend, giving her two thumbs up as she walked off stage.

“Get all your bags, get out my house, I don’t want your stuff around. I never did you wrong, but you did me wrong so go ahead and get gone,” Julie sang from the piano, repeating the intro once before Jordan joined in.

She poofed onto the stage, guitar in hand as she took over the melody, Julie jumping up from the piano as the crowd cheered for what they thought were hologram effects. As Jordan played Julie began to stomp and clap out a back beat, getting the crowd to follow along as she joined her bandmate in center stage.

“All this time, I wasted on you,” she began the first verse, the crowd yelling excitedly as the girls played. “You’d think I’d feel something. You thought wrong. I feel nothing, so now I guess it’s your move.”

“You used my back as a door, left me for dead on the floor. You didn’t try no not one bit,” Jordan took over for the pre chorus, leaning into her own mic. “Thought I came off as weak, well this is me proving you wrong.”

“Get all your bags, get out my house...” Julie took over the chorus once more, Jordan singing the backup harmonies.

Before she knew it the song was over and the crowd was screaming. Jordan grinned, slinging her guitar to the side as she pulled her mic from the stand.

“Hi, guys!” She greeted the gymnasium. “We’re Julie and the Phantoms!” The name was met with a roar of applause from the students. “I hope you don’t mind that we deviated from our usual rock sound for you tonight.

“For this next song I wanna get my girl Flynn up here!” Jordan spoke, waving the girl onto the stage again. “As you’ve all seen tonight, Flynn is crazy talented and I’m hoping she can help us out with this next song as we’re missed a few hands,” she laughed, gesturing to the mostly empty stage and Flynn nodded, moving over to her setup.

“This ones called Last Song, hope you like it,” Jordan grinned, gesturing to Julie who had returned to the piano.

While Julie began the first verse, switching the keyboard to an organ sound Jordan explained to Flynn what they needed.

“...I never let it go cause you never gave me the chance to,” Flynn joined in with the beat and Jordan grinned. “I never had the time to talk and be done with you, so I say it now,”

“This is the last song I promise you at least for now,” as Jordan came in on her guitar Julie bounded over, holding out her microphone for the ghost to take over the chorus. “This is the last song I’ll ever write about you.”

The two girls fed off each other’s energies and the cheers from the crowd, neither one able to keep the smiles off their faces.  It was over before Jordan was ready for it to be, the three girls taking a bow and Jordan disappearing once more.

She watched from the side of the stage as Julie thanked their audience and soaked up the applause with her best friend. The gymnasium emptied out not long after and once she was sure Julie was all set she poofed away, planning to give the guys a piece of her mind.

When she arrived back at the Hollywood Ghost Club she wasn’t sure what she was expecting but it hadn’t been a hopping party with a massive band. The whole room was dancing and Jordan couldn’t help but bop along to the beat as well as she searched for her bandmates. She finally found them as the song wound down, all three of them right in the middle of the stage.

“The haunting hour is upon us!” A man in a fabulous purple suit called when the clock struck midnight and the crowd replied with a low ‘ooooh’ before the band kicked up again.

Jordan watched with crossed arms as Luke scrambled to get the boys together, the trio rushing towards the exit where she was stood.

“Oh shit,” Luke cursed, stumbling to a stop in front of her and holding his arms out to stop the guys behind him.

“Yeah,” Jordan said snidely and the guys gulped.

“Gentlemen, what’s the rush?” The purple suited man from before questioned as he poofed behind the group and Jordan turned to face him. “You must be Jordan. We certainly missed you tonight.”

“Looks like I missed out on quite the party,” Jordan replied sincerely before turning to glare at the guys.

“Well the party’s just getting started, and you have an eternity after all,” he quirked an eyebrow at her and she smiled gratefully at the offer.

“Y’know that girl who can see us?” Reggie interjected, pushing forward past the guys. “We sort of bailed on her. See there’s this dance at her school tonight, and she’s got this friend Flynn who’s a super cool dj like-“

“Okay, I don’t think he has an eternity to hear the story,” Alex cut him off.

“Basically we’re late for a gig,” Luke summarized and Jordan snorted, late was an understatement.

“But what about my offer?” Purple suit asked and Jordan frowned.  

“What offer?” She asked, looking between the man and her bandmates.

“To join my house band,” he answered, spreading his arms out in a grandiose gesture. “Naturally the offer is extended to you as well, I’ve heard you possess a great musical talent.”

“Thank you,” she blushed at the compliment. “But, I’m already in a band.”

“Yeah, it’s like we said Mr. Covington,” Luke started but purple suit held up a hand to stop him.

“You have your own band, I understand.” He said, his seemingly warm smile not quite reaching his eyes. “But, if you ever wanna come back and fix that little problem with your friend, the Hollywood Ghost Club is always open.”

The guys grinned at the offer and Jordan held back a sigh. She understood the importance of getting back at Bobby but their pursuit of revenge was kind of becoming a problem.

“Yeah, man, we’d love to come back,” Luke accepted and purple suit smiled, reaching out to shake his hand.

“Music to my ears,” he said, shaking each boy’s hand in turn and then reaching Jordan. She hissed slightly as she felt something burn into her wrist as they shook hands.

“Oh, it’s just a little club stamp.” He explained as she watched the purple symbol fade away and they all nodded at the explanation.

“Until next time,” he said, chuckling deeply. It was actually mildly disturbing, Jordan thought.

She stood and watched as each boy filed out of the building, not planning to let them out of this one. Alex took a moment longer to inquire about Willie, which Jordan allowed because truthfully she was rooting for them.

Once they were out of the club, they all poofed to the school, Jordan appearing next to Julie under a now half-popped balloon arch.

“Julie we are ready to rock this.... dance,” Reggie called as the guys ran into the gym, faltering as they took in the scene before them.

“We are so, so sorry that we bailed on you,” Luke said, stopping next to Reggie as they faced Julie who had since stood up, adopting a disappointed stance.

“Yeah, the night really got away from us,” Alex continued.

“And the twin,” Reggie added, only to be met with glares form the other three ghosts.

“Why didn’t you come get us?” Luke asked, turning on Jordan accusatorially.

“Nuh uh, don’t you turn this on her,” Julie sassed, stepping between the two ghosts. “You guys were supposed to be here. She’s not your babysitter.”

“You’re right, we’re so sorry,” Luke sighed, staring down at his shoes. “But we’ll make it right, we’ll do whatever it takes. We’ll play the next school-“

“What, another dance where you can bail on me and make me look like a fool? Save it,” Julie  spoke and Jordan gulped. “If it weren’t for Jordan I never would’ve been able to show my face here again!”

“You know what sucks?” She continued, growing more emotional as the confrontation went on. “Our songs were good. And all three of you knew what I’ve been through. How tough it’s been for me to play, and you do this? Bands don’t do that to each other. Friends don’t do that to each other.”

Jordan tried to hide her sniffles as she discreetly wiped the tears from her eyes. She couldn’t handle Julie’s speech and the heartbreak obvious on the guys’ faces. She had wanted them to get shamed a little for their mistake, she was disappointed in them herself, but not like this. She couldn’t stand to see all her new friends this upset, especially with each other.  

“This was a mistake,” Julie said quietly but firmly.

“Y-you mean the school dance right?” Luke gulped.

“No.” Julie said coldly, “I mean joining a band with you guys.”

Before any of them could stop her she was running out of the gym, both Luke and Jordan calling out her name as she left.

“Why couldn’t you have just come and gotten us, Moss,” Luke spat, turning his heartbreak and frustrations on her.

Jordan sniffled, no longer trying to hide her tears as she stood from the gym floor.

“Why couldn’t you have just been responsible?” She wasn’t sure where she’d found a voice through her tears and swirling emotions, but the voice she found was full of malice and betrayal.

Before they could get into another of their signature fights she poofed out, reappearing in the studio. She didn’t stay long, only taking the time to grab her book before running up the path to the house and Julie’s room. She hoped the girl wouldn’t mind that she was there, but she was certain she wasn’t welcome in the loft anymore.

She nearly collapsed in pain upon arrival in the room. A sharp jolt of pain had shot through her chest, it felt almost as if she were dying again.

“What the hell was that?” She groaned quietly to herself, curling up on the ground.

Part 7

___

JATP Taglist: @meangirlsx 

Sunset Swerve Taglist: @oopsiedoopsie23 @angryknightstatesmantrash @onlygetaway @deni-gonzalez @advicefromnixxxx @brooke0297

#jatpweek #jatp fic #julie and the phantoms #luke patterson #luke jatp #jatp luke #reggie peters #jatp reggie #alex mercer #jatp alex #flynn jatp #jatp flynn #julie molina #caleb covington #hollywood ghost club #hgc #willex #luke patterson x oc #jatp oc #sunset swerve

[undercoverwizardfanfiction]

A Winter Night: A ROTTMNT Holiday story

Rating:G

Word Count;2358

for: @snakeeyesdraws

Characters: Donnie, Leo, Kendra

pairings: [takes breath, pulls out sword] LISTEN

update; i accidentally uploaded the draft the first time ^^’ i fixed though this is the finished version

An overtly saturated neon sign of a Santa selling sandals catches him in the corner of his eye. He uses his forearm to protect his aching eyes as he passed the sign. When he passes the blinding neon of Santa, the turtle takes a deep breath, a soft mist escaping his mouth. Honestly, he is grateful the streets aren’t more crowded. But not for his slowly numbing hands. He stuffs his hands into his unlined pockets and moves forward. Grateful more than ever that he had updated Shelldon with a heating unit so he didn’t have to weigh himself down with a heavy coat. It was making the walk to Hueso’s a bit more tolerable. He’d have to remember to update his brothers’ gear to include a heating unit like his. Course knowing them they’d probably use it to heat up marshmallows in their pockets and that was a mess he was NOT going to clean up for-

He is so wrapped up in the nightmarish scenario of having to clean marshmallows out of circuitry when a loud shriek of anger followed by a trash can flying past his line of vision causes him to jump on one foot with a shriek of fear

“Stupid AIDEN!!”

It takes Donnie a moment, and another trash can flying by his vision to realize he is not the source of anger, or in danger. He blinks and peers down the alley before having to duck in time for another trashcan to get stomped in the middle with enough strength to crunch it in half before, in a mixture of amazement he blinks. “Kendra?”

In a feral rage Kendra stomps a trashcan nearly in half before swerving around and glaring at him snarling. Her thick purple hair twisted in half ragged tangles, her beret lay on the ground as though she had thrown it to the ground before deciding that wasn’t enough to help vent her rage. Her half-crazed eyes narrowed at him. “What do YOU want?!” she bites and for a moment Donnie wishes he hadn’t stopped, “Are you here to ruin my day again?! Wreck my plans?!”

“Um,” Don blames his lack of ability to come up with a snappy come back on his even more urgent need to survive the next five seconds, or at least not end up like that trashcan. ”Are you doing something that should be stopped?”

Kendra narrows her eyes at him. “NO.”

“Do you HAVE an evil plan that I should stop? Again?”  With a snarl Don worries he might have said the wrong thing.

But then she lets out an angry sigh, “No, not now.”

“Um.” He really didn’t want to end up a Donnie shaped hole in the wall, “Then, no?”

Kendra narrows her eyes at him, Donnie could barely see the little puffs of steam burst out of her nose like a bull trying to figure out if he was a matador worth charging. But then she lets out an angry growl, ”Fine, go away then,” she says, crouching down and yanking the trash can back into a standing position kicking at it a few more times to try and un-dent it. Donnie glances back at the trash cans in the road and sighs. He pulled off his gloves, cursing the fact that he didn’t bring any extra rubber gloves, and pulls one of the trash cans off the street. Kendra glares up at him before eyeing the trashcan in confusion, “What do you want?”

“To not see cars hit trash cans? Is that supposed to be a hard question?” he asks, again berating himself when Kendra narrows her eyes at him, but lets him stand his trash can next to the one she had ‘undented’, she doesn’t thank him when he drags by the other one too. But to be honest he doesn’t really expect it. But he does finally notice that, even though she traded out her leggings for sweatpants, she’s lacking her purple dragons' jacket and is wearing a dark grey sweater and boots. All signs indicated she had not been planning on being outside in December and is using all the anger she had been trying out on the trash cans to not shiver, “Where are you going?”

“What’s it to you?” she demands.

Donnie raises his hands in mock surrender. “Honestly? I was just trying to help but if you’re going to keep acting like a jerk, I’ll-“ he wasn’t sure how he was going to finish that thought. ‘Walk away?’ ‘Blog about it angrily later?’ But it ended with someone shouting ‘heads up’ and something hard slamming into the back of his head, his vision exploding in bright colors and the breaking of a snowball contacting with his head. Off balance he finds his world spinning and himself on his knees, hands holding his head trying to make sense of the pain and his disorientation.

“Hey!” Kendra’s voice was far away, but that could be ‘cause she had stormed over to yell at the kids who had thrown the snow ball. “The hells your problem?! That was basically an ice ball you weebs.” Don could barely make out their mumbled sheepish apology. He pulls off his hat and touched the soaking bandana underneath. Any hope that it had just been snow went out the window when he drew his bloody fingers off his head.

“Holy-“ Sounds like Kendra was back, his vision was spinning so bad that he assumed the spinning purple mass by his side was her. “Hey how many fingers am I holding up?!” she said holding out her hand. He could barely make out her fingers but gave a weak, “Four?” with strength surprising for someone her size, she took his arm and lifted him to his feet, pulling his arm over her neck, “Come on there’s a hospital nearby-“

“NO,” he answers quickly.

“Are you kidding me you’re HEAD is BLEEDING.”

“And I'm a giant talking turtle which do you think will matter more to a hospital staff?!” He often wondered how Yokai managed in the city without access to a hospital. He had been meaning to ask Hueso about-. He blinks, there was no way he could let Kendra take him home. But he was already close to the pizza place “I have a place I can go. But you can’t go with me-“

“Again, your HEAD is BLEEDING,” she snaps. “I’ll take you where you need to go but I won't get any closer got it?” Donnie knew she wouldn’t take no for answer and only answered with a sigh and a nod. She pulls harder on the arm wraps over her neck and took more of his weight. Despite their height difference he barely touches the ground which only added more to the feeling of being disoriented.

“Thanks,” he muttered weakly.

“Don’t thank me til we get there.”  Donnie struggles to keep his eyes open but his swirling vision forces him to keep his eyes closed, a hand slaps his face lightly. “Hey stay awake nerd.”

“Pot calling the kettle-“ Donnie bit off the end of his statement as he tried not to dry heave. He could feel Kendras frozen bare arms through his coat and feels even worse for being out in the first place. “H-Hold on,” he says, stiffening his legs up to drag her to a stop. He manages to pry her arm off him long enough to peel his coat off leaving him in his long sleeved dark pink Atomic Lass shirt. “You’re obviously cold.” As callous as he is sometimes, he finds it’s better to be honest than to dance around the subject, “Shelldon has a heating unit that’ll keep me warm.” Though it wouldn’t help his arms, he could handle a few blocks though. Thankfully his vision is returning to some extent, enough that he notices Kendra looking to his pack and for a moment Don struggles not to shift to put the pack out of her sight, “That’s Shelly right? Is he still mad at me for tricking him?”

“Oh definitely. He has a stack of crayon drawings dedicated to his revenge on you.” He feels the shoulders on his back tighten as though Shelldon was reprimanding him for revealing his secret plans.

Kendra lets off a small shrug “Yeah fair enough, I’d probably do the same thing” before smirking directionally at the pack, ”But for the record little buddy, blue prints are a much better way to plot out revenge.”

Don tries to grin before dizziness settles in again. Kendra must have noticed since she ducked under his arm. “Hold on nerd, keep talking to me.”

He manages a nod, mentally keeping track of their location. “Wh-what were you doing out here kicking trash cans?” he asked. “And who’s this Aiden guy who has you so mad? Not that it's any of my business, but I’m kinda hurt there’s someone out there you currently hate more than me,” he says with an added offended tone that makes her glare at him in confusion. ”I mean not to brag, but I sorta consider it a pride and joy to have an enemy worthy of my intelligence.”

Kendra narrows her eyes. “Please, he’s not worthy of my time,” she says through her teeth. “There’s this guy in the robotics club with us, Aiden. A loser who couldn’t tell a snickers from a soldering pen. There was a contest to submit the best blueprints, and who ever won would to be our project for the semester.”

“I’ve seen you build stuff on your own though. “

“That wasn’t the point,” Kendra lets out an angry huff, “I won, like I knew I was going to. But he got second place, I checked the points and he was twelve points away from wining. Twelve! The loser pretty boy who had his private tutor help him.”

“But you still won-“

“-He shouldn’t have gotten that close. I did all my work by myself. Didn’t ask for help, spent nights coding and drafting. I should have left him in the dust a broken swaddled nerd with broken dreams. But no. I made sure he knew how I felt about it, but the creep tattled on me. Freaking snowflake got freaked out because his blue prints ended up on his front porch on fire. Since when is that illegal.”

“I mean,” Don pauses, “I think always.”

“Anyway, I got kicked off the club and that’s why I'm out here.” She shrugs. “If my Dad or step mom saw me getting this mad then they’d make me do the ‘breathing exercises,’” she said with air quotations, “Being all ‘Kendra we’re worried about you’ ‘Kendra we love and support you we just don’t want to see you go down a bad path’ and ‘Kendra where do you keep getting access to all this fire!?’” Her frustrations forced her to kick out at a sign they passed but thankfully not hard enough to knock it over, “So as soon as I’m done helping you, I’m going to see my Mom. She’s the only one who gets me.”

Donnie blames his concussion on being so surprised Kendra had a mom but tried to keep it off his features. But judging by the quiet scoff from Kendra he hadn’t done a very good job, "How about you Greeny? Why did you come out here if you already had a concussion? Don’t pretend like you didn’t have one, I saw the bandages when I was checking your scalp. You already had a head injury before you got hit in the head.”

Figures his hat would blame him, and his own disorientation for forgetting that Kendra had checked his scalp. “It's complicated.”

“More complicated then plotting revenge on a spoiled white boy in a Vanilla Ice t-shirt?” she says in a tone that tells Donnie she’s trying to make a joke. And despite his best efforts not to, he snorts slightly, “No, I'll agree it’s not that complicated.” But it still feels weird to share with a certified enemy who once tried to steal the Spirit of Labour Day (don’t ask can’t explain). Thankfully she doesn’t rush him as he tries to collect his thoughts. “I got into an argument with my brother.” He still doesn’t want to let her in on too much information. “My brothers are all protective of each-other but he's’ protective in a way that makes me nuts. He thought it was too soon for me to go out with this whole situation,” he said gesturing to his head bandage, “And I disagreed. Except I didn’t really do it in the best way.”

“I think I know what that means,” Kendra says. “Did you say something bad?”

For a moment, it takes all of Don’s remaining mental energy to not think about Leo’s face, watching his concerned features fade away to one of hurt. So hurt in fact he hadn’t even called after Donnie when he stormed out. He lets out a sigh. “I did. I wish I had a reasonable excuse for it, but to be honest I don’t like feeling like I'm depending on people. I don’t like feeling like he’s always concerned about me. I especially don’t like him being right about it.”

“Sucks when it feels like you’re under-appreciated huh?”

“Yeah.” He could make out a familiar sandal store that housed Hueso’s alley. “We’re here,” he says.

Kendra looks around, and for a moment Donnie is concerned Kendra is going to insist on taking him ‘inside’ but she ducks from under shoulder. “You sure?” she asks, “I can take you further.”

“I’m good, thanks though.” He tries to give her a confident smile but his lips only twitch in response. She gives a half shrug before she starts pulling off his coat. “Keep it. You have a long way to walk and I still have Shelldon to keep me warm.”

“Thanks,” she says pulling the coat back on. “I’ll catch you later Greeny,” she says. She looks like she's’ about to walk off when she pauses. “But for the record, it still must be nice to have brothers who have your back.”

“It is.” Don nods. “And honestly Aiden sounds like a little bitch.”

For the first time since their strange encounter began Kendra put on a full smile. “Thanks,” she says before walking off.

(#)(#)\/(#)(#)

Leo didn’t snore.

So when his phone went off amongst his makeshift ‘pillow floor’ in the living room he did not ‘snort’ awake. He made a strangled noise before sitting up. Patting his sweatpants and hoody pockets before diving into the mass of pillows. Breaching a moment later like a whale with his phone in his teeth. Hueso’s ID is flashing across his screen. With a scoff he answers. “For the last time BONE man I don’t work today-“

“First of all, that is NOT how you politely answer a phone,” Hueso starts with a snap of his teeth. “Second that’s not why I'm calling. Your brother is here with me.”

Leo blinks, he blames his previous hibernated state on why it took him so long to remember which brother had left the lair. “Donnie? Is he ok?” he said already going to his room and looking for his sword under his bed.

“He is alright, but it looks like he got hit on the head pretty hard-“

That’s all it takes for him to charge out of his room, lingering only long enough to grab the toolbox he used for a first aid kit, and grabbing his portal sword from the kitchen (vaguely remembering he had used it to cut some cheese for his peanut butter and cheese grilled sandwich earlier) and slicing the sword down to activate a portal to Hueso’s office. Without saying bye, he hangs his phone up and jumps through.

The aforementioned skeleton, who had been glaring at his phone as though offended Leo had hung up on him, gave a shriek as the turtle appears by his side. “BAH! Leo, I hate it when you-“

Leo immediately tuned him out when he saw Donnie laying on Hueso’s couch with an ice pack over his forehead, he hurried forward and knelt down. “You ok buddy?” he asks.

Donnie looks up at him from under the ice pack with a weak smile. “I don’t know, are you really uglier than the last time I saw you or is that my head talking?”

Leo couldn’t help but grin. “I thought brain injuries were supposed to make people nicer,” he says. He turns to the toolbox and starts going through the first aid supplies inside. “Thanks for letting him rest. In your office,” he tells Hueso as he sets aside a pen light and some new bandages.

“Why wouldn’t I? Out of your brothers he’s most definitely my favorite.”

“Wait you have a favorite?” Leo looks to him. “Then who's your least favorite?”

After a pause, Hueso gives a wide and strained grin. “I will leave you two to it. If you need me just call me,” he says before ducking out quickly.  

It’s only then that Leo turns his barely contained worried energy on Donnie “What happened? Who did this? Do you have their address and sleep schedule-“

“Leo,” Don starts in a pained voice, “Please, my head feels like someone tried to split it with an ax. It was an accident. Some kids hit me in the head with a snow ball.“

Leo was about to start on another tirade of questions when he forced himself to take a deep breath, “Yeah, ok, I'm sorry,” he says. Also trying to ignore Donnie’s missing coat. He looks back to his supplies and pulls out a pen light. “I’m going to check your pupil dilation, but only if you're up for it.” He waits for Donnie to give a slight nod before he lifts the pen and carefully pushes the ice pack away from his eyes. Using his thumb to cover Don’s opposite eye without actually touching him, with a flash the pupil constricts and dilates as it should. He does the same process to the other “Well that’s good at least,” Leo says. “How’s your vision?”

“Spinning, but I think that’s from the pain.”

That would make sense. The red slider turtle rose to sit on the edge of the couch, carefully unwrapping Don’s scalp as gently as he can, checking his facial expression for any signs of increased pain before he lets out a sigh of relief. “It's just a surface bleed. It doesn’t look like the actual injury itself reopened.”

“That’s good,” Donnie says with a soft sigh. “You’re doing a good job.”

“I had a good teacher.” Leo made sure to give Donnie a soft smile that the turtle barely returns. “Let me just change the bandages and we’ll head home when you feel up for it. Maybe we can order some pizza; I've had a monster craving for anchovy and chocolate syrup pizza for days-“

“I was wrong.”

Leo blinks, pausing from unwrapping the new bandages with his hands. It takes him longer than he should to realize what Don’s apologizing for and when he does, he only returns to digging through his kit. “You were a little right,” Leo says quietly putting aside a bottle of alcohol, “I mean it's kinda right, right?? You're usually right-“

“No, Leo.” Donnie tries to sit up but fails to get up more than a few seconds before Leo’s grip on his arm forces him back down. “Leo I was wrong. I was angry, my head was killing me I would have said anything to hurt you. You don’t mess everything up-“

“Except I do?” Leo lets out a soft laugh. “I mean I do. Between the minotaur's pizza and Big Mama I'm surprised I get anything right-“

Don’s hand grabs his shoulders and before Leo can stop him, the soft-shell forces himself into a sitting position with pure grit alone (judging by the pain filled grimace on his face, “Would you listen to me?!” Donnie demands shaking him by the shoulders, “I shouldn’t have even said it but I would have said anything. I was angry at feeling so helpless and dependent. I was angry because you were right for trying to stop me from going out. I did need your help and I shouldn’t have been so difficult. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry-“ his last sentence is interrupted with a sob that helps him notice the tears running down his face. Donnie lets out an aggravated huff as he presses the heel of his hands against his streaming eyes to help spare his dignity in some way.

He feels the couch shift as Leo shifts closer, wrapping his arms around him. “Ok, ok you were wrong. I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing Leo,“ Donnie manages to say from his brother’s shoulder. “I’m the one apologizing not you, idiot.”

“Alright, alright I apologize for apologizing. You were wrong I was right. Is that what you want to hear?” he asks. Don nods into his shoulder. Leo rests his cheek on Dons’ shoulder rubbing his shell for a few moments as Don’s erratic breathing finally starts to calm down.

After a few seconds Don lets out a small sigh, “Damn it, I was doing so good too. I can't even tell anymore if these are meltdowns or panic attacks.”

“As long as you don’t have to deal with them alone when you don’t want to, that’s all I care about.” Leo gives him a final squeeze before reaching up and taking Don’s shoulders, gently guiding him down to lay down again. “Ok buddy. I’m going to rewrap your head, and then I'm going to go order us some food and portal us home. You just relax ok?” He waits for Donnie to nod before Leo starts applying some alcohol to a cotton ball. “I’ll be honest though, I’m sorta surprised you made it here safely.”

Don for the first time since Leo entered Hueso’s office looks him with his tired blood shot eyes. A soft smile forming on his face as he relaxes. “Yeah,” he whispers. ”Me too.”

#rottmnt #rottmnt fanfiction #Rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #leo #donnie #kendra #christmas #gift #what a long year

[shadowedvales]

So… in the additional media of Stranger Things (specifically the comics I’m mentioning), it was initially Brenner’s idea/plan to kill off the other test subjects because they weren’t performing as well as Eleven was. It was his best solution because that way, all the resources, time, and money could instead be placed only to her. And I just…. sure Henry is a fine character and the massacre makes a lot of sense to me, but I think I am once again gonna change up my canon to actually fit this potential narrative instead.

I genuinely think the comic canon of the lab and Brenner is far more intriguing than the show. Everything with 9/9.5, Ricky, and Francine. Eleven being the only one who grew up completely in the lab. Those other kids were either volunteers, well into their teens, or had some semblance of a home life. Eleven was the only one practically moulded from the womb. And they all had such a range of interesting powers. I firmly stand with the idea that Jane is the only one who can contact The Void.

Brenner’s entire point of view on the lab subjects changed the second he found out Terry was pregnant. He discovered he could steal this baby and make her his own. There would be no convincing the child because it’s all she would have ever known. Because of this, I would not put it past a man like Brenner to kill the other subjects for the sake of the “greater good” aka Eleven. Eleven’s gifts just continue thriving beyond his wildest expectations. Brenner would never dare assume that having moulded her from the womb, she would still be able to grow into her own person, her own mind, and one day be able to see him for exactly who he was.

Back before season four aired, it was obvious there were other test subjects because Jane was 011. So there were at least ten kids before her. But I always liked the idea/assumed that she was the last experiment because she was the most successful. That they didn’t need anyone after her because she was fulfilling everything they set out for her to do. With flying colours.

I just think the whole Rainbow Room idea, pitting the kids against each other thing… been there, done that. Boring and predictable. I think at this point my portrayal of her time in Hawkins Lab really stems from the complete isolation she endured. Where having the Rainbow Room, although Eleven was obviously the most isolated out of the kids, brings that sense of community and sister/brotherhood. Albeit extremely warped and toxic. Knowing that she wasn’t alone in that experience just. Doesn’t sit well with me. I think it’s important to note that she was alone, physically and mentally. Which is why Kali is also so important to her growth. I thought a lot of the flashbacks of her time in the lab during season four was really boring, repetitive, and just very predictable. Although Peter becoming Vecna was a surprise to me, and was a nice little twist, the idea of her having an ally on the inside was really interesting.

Maybe they did get as far as they do in canon, Peter Ballad was telling the truth about everything, about some of the workers there being prisoners like him, and he really wanted to get her out and to safety. But before they can escape through the pipes, they’re caught. Peter is shot on the spot, and Eleven is put into the isolation room for a few days as punishment. In this timeline, Henry would be Vecna, but Henry would not be Peter Ballad.

When Eleven turned seven, and was already showing extreme promise, where the other children were average at best, Brenner had the eight children killed. Kali had already escaped. This was the main cause for Peter to gain Eleven’s trust and try to get her out. Because if Brenner could murder his “children” in cold blood, there’s no way Eleven was safe even in spite of her power.

When Eleven is allowed out of the isolation room, her testing becomes more rigorous in attempt to distance and make her forget about what she attempted to do with Peter. Brenner begins gaslighting her, saying that there was never a Peter, that she must have been dreaming. Eleven does ask “papa” about “mama”, given Peter told her of the day Terry broke in the lab, but Brenner is convincing enough to make Eleven believe it was all in her head. Say she is around eight years old, meaning the same timeline of season fours canon flashbacks.

I still do wanna keep the Henry Creel canon, and keep him as 001. Brenner didn’t have him killed alongside the other test subjects, because who knows, one day he could become an even better asset than 011. Brenner definitely wants to be able to control Henry, but keeps the chip in him because, for the moment, doesn’t know how. Killing him would be too big of a loss.

When Eleven is ten years old, Henry’s concealed powers break free and he manages to get the chip out himself, and unleashes hell onto Hawkins Lab. He almost kills Brenner by snapping his bones, but Eleven manages to stop him. Her extreme abilities are unleashed, and she sends Henry to the Upside Down. She does fall into a coma due to the extremity of the situation, but she does not forget what happened. Brenner believes she’s the perfect weapon as she stepped in to save him without a second thought, was able to defeat Henry, and opened a door to something he never thought possible. Eleven is rewarded for her efforts. Although she remembers the entire battle / confrontation, her memories regarding the portal are very hazy.

Brenner decides not to focus on the portal straight away, instead gets her training harder and harder to see what else she can accomplish. Also loved the idea of Brenner sending her into The Void to “look for him” so that will definitely be kept.

By the time she escapes and season one begins, her knowledge of the Upside Down is basically what we see in canon. Because she passed out the moment after she sent Henry away, she was once again gaslighted into believing she merely threw him through the glass and killed him. For two years she believed this, until making contact with the Demogorgan, and those memories return completely.

Due to her saving Brenner’s life, (it was pure instinct. She happened to be there. Saw her “papa” hurt and knew she had to make him better.) Brenner constantly thanks her. But in a very condescending way. Tells her: “you saved me so I can continue saving you.” Aka, harness your abilities and see what else I can achieve from you. Despite the fact that she saved his life, these words and phrases make her feel indebted to him. That she owes him something further.

I don't realistically see her thriving with her speech improvement until she's well into her twenties at least. Her slowed development, sensory and social deprivation causes a serious delay in language. Surrounded by other children she would have overheard conversations, some would have spoken to her. Her conveniently forgetting her upbringing pre the battle with Henry just isn't good enough for me anymore. It makes more sense for her to have been raised alone.

It also helps indicate why she gravitated towards the boys when they found her in the woods. They would have been the first people her age she ever remembered seeing. As far as she knew, during the lab there was no one like her. Everyone was much older, they were adults-- although she stayed with Benny, I'm not sure if she would have stuck around very long. Where she followed the boys home without thought.

Also it's important to note that after time, Jane does understand that Peter Ballad was a real person, and was truly the first person (aside from Terry) who wanted the best for her. When she remembers him, knows that Brenner was lying, she deals with immense guilt regarding his death. He was shot right in front of her eyes, because he was trying to help her. This is another catalyst as to why after season two, Jane never refers to Brenner as papa. She does not give him that sort of credit.

#study. #although henry offering eleven a place at his side wouldn’t be canon #he would definitely still look at her as an enemy for basically stopping his revenge. #AND the whole speech between he and jane never sat right with me. #saying brenner made him what he was / that it wasnt his fault etc. Like. No? henry was a sociopath. he killed his family. #brenner didn’t do anything to make him who he is. so jane always saw him for exactly what he was #and there’s absolutely no sympathy there. #and then regarding my season four canon as her regaining her powers by remembering the massacre/the fight. i am changing that to her #regaining her powers by simply confronting her past. understanding what she went through. finding ways to cope with it physically and #mentally. getting coping mechanisms from her therapist. seeking help. not needing to know WHY this happened to her (because there is not. #and will never be a reason.) but finding ways to accept it and move on. how to move on from eleven and become janessa ives. #also just because in this case henry doesn’t massacre a bunch of kids? It doesn’t make him any less evil. in this instance i am following #the idea that some of the workers were prisoners there in hawkins lab. and henry killed a bunch of the workers. so would definitely have #killed some innocent people. #just because i am separating peter from henry. does NOT mean i am excusing anything from henry/vecna. #in this case they are two completely different people. although i highkey wanna use jcb as peter because he just did the role SO WELL and #was SO BELIEVABLE i’m not sure about it yet. because i don’t want anyone to get the impression that i’m making excuses for henry. #BUT YES. #this be the new canon. <3 #idc brenner is such a good fuckin villain he’s disgusting but so intriguing.

[scorched-light]

Here is my The Last of Us Part 2 review for anyone who is interested to know about the leaks and if the story was done any justice. The answer is the leaks were basically on point and no. No it was not. Spoilers below, don't read on if you're after a spoiler free review. Final warning: End of Game Spoilers for The Last of Us Part 2!!! Do not read if you don't want spoilers!

Okay. As someone who adores the first game, it pains me to say this but I'm so disappointed with this overpriced horror show. A complete deconstruction of the first game and the characters you developed a connection to therein. Just a complete brutality to basically every character new and old, and the whole franchise's reputation.

Joel announcing his name to a group of strangers he already seemed suspicious of despite knowing that people could be looking for him after what he did was so forced and out of character. This man hit a guy with his truck on the off chance that he might be faking his injuries. He was always super cautious, wary of strangers, and aware of his surroundings.

Ellie walking in on Joel getting beaten to death, GUN IN HAND, and not immediately shooting Abby was also incredibly ooc. Even if she was shocked, this is the girl who shot a man at age 14 to save Joel, here she charges in through the door instead of shooting when she's had years worth of experience shooting first and asking questions later. A lot of the ooc stuff she does after his death is excusable by her obvious trauma up until the ending, at least, but it's still bad writing.

Poor writing, not just in the overall story but also in terms of the characters, is literally used as a gratuitous stepping stone (AKA a shameless excuse) to get to all of the brutal, gorey violence. Not to mention it ends in a bleak way with no silver lining at all. Compare that to the way the first one, while bleak in nature still had its nice moments. Its moments of "ya know what maybe this hellscape is worth sticking around for." It made you feel things. The giraffe scene? Running out of the hospital holding Ellie as Joel gently, desperately tells her she's okay? Beautiful, complexly emotional moments But this game? I'd get more emotional fulfillment shoving fingernail clippings up my ass hole.

Don't get me wrong, I expected it to be bleak. The tone of the game is post-apocalypse. It revolves around death and the ugliness of man and yes yes it's all very grim. That kind of prepares you for how this isn't going to be a totally happy story. But everything they built up and established in the first game is just burned to the ground.

All the gameplay is basically the same as the first with some exploration buffs and NPC tweeks, companion AI feels clunkier now but a lot of the interactions between your people and between enemies outside of cutscenes feels very fluid and natural. That said, a lot of the stuff that's good about the game is done in flashbacks to when Ellie was younger. The actual current story they're telling had potential but the executuion is poor.

The game is trying so hard to get a specific reaction while blowing holes in why and how you should feel that way. We are supposed to empathise with Abby just because we are exposed to her when we're forced to play as her? We are supposed to think bad of Ellie when she killed Mel after Mel attacked her first instead of just pleading "I'm pregnant!"?

Abby killed the man that saved her life brutally and mercilessly. She wasn't able to empathise at all, but you are expected to empathise with her? She even goes on to have a similar, protective sort of relationship with Lev as Joel did with Ellie. Maybe not in a parental way, but the parallels are still there. A notable one is when she's carrying Lev bridal style in her arms off of the island, the same way Joel carried Ellie.

The writing even frames Ellie as being bad, killing a pregnant woman (even though she didn't know and upon finding out, falls to her knees and heaves), and frames Abby as good/the victim, helping and protecting Lev, a victim of transphobia, and slowly discovering and watching more and more of her friends as they die. They try to manipulate you as the player with bad writing.

It really could have been a good story had they spent more time on Ellie working through her feelings towards Joel and his decision to save her. Maybe Abby kills Tommy so Joel can know what it's like to lose a loved one, maybe Ellie is forced to join with him again on their journey for revenge, maybe she more or less HAS to face up to what happened while begrudgingly working with him. Especially after her constantly telling him she doesn't need his help.

He still could have died, maybe before they *really* fix everything. Maybe he gets bitten, that'd be poetic, he robbed humanity of the cure and then died to the infection. Ellie has to face up to the fact that he'd be alive if she had died, and he has to face that too. He also wouldn't have been bitten at all had he not been out for revenge in the first place, so his death would be the price of them wanting revenge for revenge, AND be a much better way of showcasing the cycle of loss being the cycle of revenge in a way that doesn't come across as incredibly redundant for the environment they're in. Ellie really would be The Last of Us. The last of the iconic duo that gave the series its incredible reputation. She could go on to kill Abby and realise it's not made her feel any better, now they've lost Tommy AND Joel, and nothing is going to bring Joel back.

ANYTHING would have been better than what we got. Joel's death 2 hours in was super premature and such a meaningless way to go for a character like Joel. Not to mention the character that looks like Neil Druckman spitting on his corpse but whatever, I digress.

All of this and the fact that the ending is not at aaaaall worth it makes this feel so incredibly soulless. They wanted to go down the route of "is there really a good guy in this kind of world?", and that idea could have worked even for the grim reality in which the story takes place. But then they butcher the execution, force you to play as the character who beat Joel to death for a massive portion of the game, and leave off with a terrible ending.

!Here come the end of game spoilers!

Ellie stated in the first game that she's most afraid of ending up alone, and they did that to her. She suddenly realises that Killing Is Wrong after slaughtering countless men and women to get to this moment with Abby. She is in the middle of drowning her and suddenly lets her live. This woman killed Joel, almost killed Dina. In fact, upon hearing that Dina was pregnant from a battered and bleeding Ellie, she says "Good.", and proceeds to almost slit her throat only that Lev stops her. But Ellie suddenly forgets all of that and lets her leave.

Ellie goes back to the farm she and Dina were living on with their baby only to find Dina has left, as she warned Ellie she would if she leaves for revenge again. The revenge Ellie didn't even get. She goes into a room and sees her guitar in its case. She pulls it out and learns she can no longer play the way Joel showed her all those years ago because she had her fingers bitten off during the struggle with Abby. She props the guitar up by the window, almost as if in memory of the man who taught her to play, and leaves it behind. She has no use for it now. Ellie walks through the field outside, alone. Joel dead. Tommy partially paralysed but his characterisation definitely got massacred. Dina gone. Cut to credits. Game over.

There isn't even a slither of happiness in this game. Was the lesson "revenge is bad"? Because if so, they should have rolled the credits as soon as Abby killed Joel and told players "if that made you uncomfortable, do not seek revenge." In big writing before rolling the credits.

Either way the ending would leave you shifting uncomfortably with a bad taste in your mouth.

I won't even go into how the trailers lied. "You think I'd let you do this alone?" Tell that to Abby's driver. I'm interested to see how quickly the price drops on the PlayStation Store. Even if it gets cheap, I wouldn't bother subjecting yourself to this trashfire.

#The Last of Us #The Last of Us Part 2 #The Last of Us Part II #TLoU pt 2 #TLoU2 #Ellie #Joel #Spoilers #The Last of Us Spoilers #The Last of Us Part 2 Spoilers

[shypotato-translations]

QTVW Chapter 17

Showbiz* Sexy Queen (IV)

----

“……”

Even though Mei Mu Lan's heart was in a state of shock, her face was still slightly stiff as she said,

“Haha, I'm just kidding, I'm actually a big fan of yours and I love your movies, so can you sign my autograph?”

As she said this, she took the script from the hands of the petrified director and kneaded it in her hands, smoothing out the curled paper before handing it over with a slightly shy expression,

“Then, just sign here.”

Ling Yi Yao looked at her with slightly narrowed eyes, and there were unreadable emotions in them.

She took the script, signed her name on that, handed it back, and said,

“Thank you for your support, Miss Mei.”

Mei Mu Lan took the script and stared at the three big words on the page with glowing eyes, her face was uncontrollably excited, and she performed the image of a fan getting an autograph from her idol with perfection.

She blinked her charming eyes and looked at Ling Yi Yao with an affectionate expression, saying,

“I'll always be there for you, you're the best in my heart! Keep up the good work!”

The director, who had been ignored as a set-piece for a long time, suddenly made his presence known, smiling broadly and saying,

“I didn't know you were so fond of her, but since Ling Yi Yao is your idol, she'll be your mentor for the rest of your life.”

Mei Mu Lan was immediately surprised and said,

“Is it really possible? But……”

With a look of embarrassment on her face, she said,

“This will not affect and delay the work of Queen Ling, right?”

With a gentle smile on her face, Ling Yi Yao said,

“No, I have long admired Miss Mei's reputation, I won't find it troublesome. Moreover, Miss Mei's previous performance platforms are all top international art theatres, your performance experience is very rich, I believe you are a good student who can easily start.”

With a big smile on her face, Mei Mu Lan said,

“In that case, I'll be counting on you after that, Teacher Ling.”

“You're welcome, just call me Ling Yi Yao.”

Ling Yi Yao replied with a light smile.

At this time, an abrupt phone rang, and Mei Mu Lan looked in the direction of the voice, and saw the director answering the phone in a frenzied manner, saying,

“It's me…… I've already got the part of the second female character…… You have to be interviewed by the producer to do this? Who said that? Big Boss…… All right then, I'll send her over now.”

The director hung up the phone with an embarrassed look on his face as he scratched his head awkwardly and said,

“So, the producer just called and asked you to audition again, because the producer seems to be holding an audition for the supporting female character. Sorry, go for another interview, go through the motions, you'll be selected anyway with your strengths.”

Mei Mu Lan froze for a moment and said after coming back to her senses,

“That's fine, it's the process, I can't make any special distinctions, I'm on my way, director, where's the interview?”

The director smiled toothily, reached out and pointed in one direction, and said,

“I'll take you there. I guess the staff will give you a script and let you do an impromptu performance based on the script, and those who perform well will be selected as real supporting female actresses.”

“I see, then you can take me there first,”

With that, she looked at Ling Yi Yao again and said,

“See you later, Ling Yi Yao.”

Ling Yi Yao also stood up, smoothed out her ancient dress and said,

“I'm one of the interviewers, I'll come with you.”

The three of them walked together to an ancient style tavern, Mei Mu Lan said goodbye to the director and Ling Yi Yao, then went to the waiting room for the female supporting roles.

As soon as she entered, she saw a dozen young and gorgeous women, who were now studying the script carefully in their hands. When they saw Mei Mu Lan walk in, they raised their heads and stared over, and only when Mei Mu Lan found a place to sit in the corner did they avert their eyes.

Mei Mu Lan sat alone on a sofa, her head hanging slightly, her long hair hiding the expression on her face.

In her mind, she recalled what had happened earlier, when her emotions were out of control and she had done some of the original owner's daily actions. Even though the original owner's soul is completely dissipated, the body still gives some instinctive reactions to reality.

She didn't know why this was happening, and she didn't know if anything like this had happened in previous missions. But this sudden event today has clearly given her a direction for her strategy.

The villainous BOSS mentioned in the plot is an apparently gentle and generous film queen, but in reality, she is a woman who has blood on her hands, was secretly raised in the underworld and has been a mentor to killers in the underworld for her entire adult life.

She's a hothead, a frightening figure in the dark world, and even her uncle, who raised her from a young age, chose to kill her when their interests diverged.

At the same time she also sent people to murder the female lead several times, the novel explains that it was because if she could not be loved then it was better to destroy, not to say whether this is true or not, but the description of her ruthlessness is definitely the real deal.

And this time, such a woman became the object of her raid.

Ling Yi Yao is dark and ruthless, confronting her enemies and eliminating their roots. If she wants to take her on, the first thing she needs to do is to reduce her threat level, so that Ling Yi Yao feels that she is harmless and can be approached in depth, so that she can drop her guard.

And in order to achieve this, she must show herself to be harmless.

At the same time, she must show her affection for her in order to stop the "I only think of you as a friend" type of outcome from happening.

During her growing up years, many people must have wooed her, but they chickened out when they learned of her indifference, while this time, she chose to do the opposite and insisted on persistently adoring her to impress her.

When Mei Mu Lan thought of this, she suddenly recalled today's oops incident, and she made this decision because of today's incident.

Anyway, her image has already been ruined in public, so why not 'break the pot' and 'not do anything' and choose the active pursuit mode, expressing her sincerity in all sorts of ways to brush up Ling Yi Yao's goodwill?

Plus, the original owner's situation would make this method work very well.

For example, the original owner's background is so clean that even if the villains wanted to investigate her, they wouldn't find out much dark information;

The people around the original owner knew about Mei Mu Lan's affection for Ling Yi Yao, as well as the original owner's posting and microblogging accounts, all of which could show that the infatuation for Ling Yi Yao herself came to light;

She was unable to control her feelings for Ling Yi Yao many times and basically got emotional and her eyes lit up when she saw her……

So, after combining all the above, Mei Mu Lan embarked on the path of a "martyr who is afraid of stalking girls".

Mei Mu Lan figured this out and breathed a huge sigh of relief in her heart, no matter what, she already had a direction for her strategy, after that she just had to work hard in that direction.

With a goal to strive for, she was in a much better mood. She lifted her head and tilted the long curly hair on her forehead to the side, and then a woman dressed in a Republican student girl's dress, innocent-looking and lotus-like, came into her eyes.

The woman had her hands folded in front of her at the moment, holding a folder, her smooth flat fringes hanging down in front of her forehead, and one foot on tiptoe. The whole person carried a strong school freshness style, two very different types from Mei Mu Lan herself. One is as light as a chrysanthemum, the other as enchanting as fire.

Mei Mu Lan noticed her at first because of her charming aura, but when she saw what she looked like, a deep thought flashed in her eyes.

This woman, she looked familiar, she had seen it in the original owner's memory, and she had seen it many times.

Because this woman, the daughter of her father's newly married stepmother, her stepsister, is also the female lead of this showbiz revenge reversal novel, Bai Jieying.

After recognizing her, Mei Mu Lan did not go over to talk to her, because their relationship was already full of conflicts, and now this white lotus-like harmless woman was already a blackened and mutated version, in the novel, she went from gentle and lovely mode to cold and ruthless mode in just one day.

Mei Mu Lan has always stayed away from these types of women, except for missions of course.

She leaned her back on the sofa, her whole body taking on a lazy pose, and Bai Jieying across the room must have recognised her too, but it was clear that she had no intention of recognising her on the spot either.

Mei Mu Lan suddenly thinks of the original owner's death by poison. According to the original owner's memory, the most likely people to poison the original owner are the stepmother and the female lead.

It seems that she still needs to get in touch with them, and perhaps in a few days she should also go back to the Mei family to investigate in person.

After waiting for an unknown amount of time, the director's assistant came in with a stack of envelopes, which he placed on the table, and then said loudly,

“Here are the excerpts of the plays you will be performing, now come one by one and collect an envelope. After half an hour, those whose names are read out will be interviewed in the interview room next door. Okay, now who's first?”

After his words landed, the women in the room, all of them, stepped forward slowly and unhurriedly, picked up an envelope from the table, then stepped aside to open it and look at it.

Mei Mu Lan waited until the end before she slowly got up to get her envelope, she brushed past Bai Jieying who also stayed at the end, ignoring each other like fellow passers-by.

Mei Mu Lan took the envelope and returned to the sofa to sit down. She tore open the envelope, picked up the white letterhead on a black background inside and read it line by line.

Half an hour later, the first person was called out for an interview, and the atmosphere in the room was noticeably more depressing.

Mei Mu Lan closed her eyes to herself and waited until her name was read before she slowly and enchantingly picked up the envelope with her fingertips and slowly walked out.

Entering the interview room, she was greeted by a completely empty place and handed the letterhead to a staff member who in turn handed it to the interviewer.

She stepped into the room without a glance, then turned to face the dozen people sitting across from her.

The director, sitting at the very centre, casually scanned the letterhead, then waved at Mei Mu Lan and shouted,

“Action!”

Mei Mu Lan then moves into the role of the female supporting role.

【Inside the dark and empty tomb room, two urgent footsteps came to an abrupt halt.

Through the faint light of the candle, one can see a wonderful trajectory formation in the middle of the room. A woman in a purple body-hugging cheongsam, now looking at the formation with a wolfish look, said to the man beside her,

“Blood leads to the formation, the next hurdle requires blood to open the formation before the door to the tomb will open.”

The stocky uniformed man at her side, propping himself up on one leg, raised a rigid eyebrow at the words and said,

“Let's wait for the next person to come and then turn it on. Let's take a break, you come and hold me.”

The cheongsam-clad woman walked slowly over to him and the two leaned in intimately.

The uniformed man said with deep emotion,

“When you get that elixir of immortality, you can surely preserve your youthful beauty.”

The cheongsam-clad woman shook her head and inclined her head to look at the uniformed man, her beautiful, demon-like face could be seen in the dull candlelight, she was now licking her red lips gently, her eyes looking at the uniformed man with fascination, and then said with a soft smile,

“Say……”

She whispered;

“You love me……”

She murmured.

The uniformed man smiled at that and he said in a low voice,

“Mmm, love you.”

The cheongsam-clad woman laughed delicately, a vivid and seductive expression on her face, but as she laughed, tears streamed down her face, crossing her cheeks and falling into the man's chest.

The woman in the cheongsam laughed and cried at the same time, she frowned slightly and said,

“You're very kind. You've always been very kind to me,”

She lifted her hand and caressed the man's neck and cheek.

Then, like a snake-like white arm, it fell behind the man's ear, a silver needle appearing abruptly, revealing its unsettling colour in the dark, obscure light.

The cheongsam-clad woman stabbed the silver needle deep into the back of the man's head, and the long, thin silver needle actually pierced through the man's brain and penetrated the whole thing.

The man stared with blood-red eyes, the expression on his face was one of distortion and disbelief as he died.

The cheongsam-clad woman 'giggled' softly, singing a love song from Shanghai at night on her lips, and pushed the man to the ground, blood crumbling out of the corpse as the blood-initiated formation was broken and a blackened tomb passage was opened.

The woman in the cheongsam stroked her long, dishevelled hair and walked enchantingly into the tomb passage, the grey walls falling abruptly as she passed.

The scene is dark and the only thing in the air is a love song that is softly sung.】

#shypotato #yuri #transmigration #world hopping #QTVW17

[exquisitley-obsessed]

rdr2 characters with an accented s/o

masterlist

please no spoilers I’m still currently playing the game but jeeeeezeee...Rockstar really didn’t have to play with my heart by making such attractive characters ://

Dutch:

Most likely out of everyone to give you a nickname based off your accent/background

e.g. Royal Highness if you’re British 

Armada if Spanish

Fucking baguette or something if tour French (actually, he’d probably call you Antoinette)

Definitely would find a way to lie, cheat and steal using your accent as an advantage

You doing a lost foreigner act on a carriage whilst he robs the boot

After a while you notice he stops doing this so much

You assume it’s because he doesn’t want to put himself out there too much

Really, it’s because he’s realising how much danger you end up putting yourself in

Brings you trinkets associated with your heritage after long trips away

He asks you about your upbringing but only in the soft moments

Like the early hours of the morning when your both half-asleep and entangled in the bed sheets

“Was it beautiful...where you grew up?”

“...It could’ve been”

Subconsciously, he bases his ideas of ‘Paradise’ on what you describe to him about your hometown

Trains you on an American accent when he realises your own accent makes you more recognisable to his many, many enemies

If you give him a nickname it’ll appear like he doesn’t react

In reality, he thinks about it every spare moment he gets

The word becomes a safe place for him

Arthur:

Out of everyone, he barely even recognises that you even have an accent

It all blurs for him

It’s only when he mistakenly guesses your heritage that you’re like...hang on a second

“It’s a buffalo y/n...don’t you get those back in Germany?”

“Arthur I’m not...German?”

It becomes an inside joke

He nicknames you ‘Germany’ and uses it when times aren’t stressful

Like when you’re out hunting together

And you’re teasing him

He doesn’t ask you too much about your backstory, he doesn’t much mind

He cares more about who you are today

One day he brings you back a photo album, brimming with images from your distant home

You don’t know where it comes from and he never tells

Just smiles and leaves it near your bed for you to discover

You don’t know for months it was him who gave it to you

He lets it slip at some point

It’s quite a revealing moment

It’s just a photo album but, feels like so much more

It’s also in that moment that Arthur realises something in himself

Things change after that, for the good

You promise yourself to always keep the photo album with you - till the day you die

Javier:

Instant bonding over having accents

Everyone else finds it funny how quickly you two get on

Already comfortable running jobs and errands together within days

Talking mindlessly as your horses relax into a steady trot next to one another

Doing watch around camp together

Whatever feelings arise in you, you bury quickly, convincing yourself that he only sees you as a friend

He doesn’t

He likes to remind you that you’re the only one he’s comfortable around

Like truly, comfortable

He’s never on guard around you

Never worried about sounding too much like a ‘greaser’

You don’t really see how much he opens himself up to you, and only you

He likes hearing you sing

Even when you feel like you sound terrible

“Mi amor...please...stop being self-conscious, and sing the damn song”

The first time things feel serious is when you’re on watch together in the early hours

He’s smoking a cigarette, watching the sun before saying

“I wish you could’ve met my mamma...you remind me of her sometimes.”

The way he looks at you then, you’ll never forget 

Charles Smith:

King of already knowing more about your culture than you do

After meeting you, maybe he starts speaking in your home language and you’re just like

...

“I only know the basics”

He’s the only person (except maybe Strauss??) who could tell you more about your own culture than you already know

He definitely is the only person you’d allow to lecture you on your own culture

Because he never means harm

Like ever

He’s just a knowledgeable person

You’d bring out the more of the wild side of him

It’s exhilarating for him to do jobs with you

Something about risking his life with you at his side

He’ll definitely braid you hair

You don’t even ask the first time

You’re just sitting between his legs around the campfire as everyone’s singing a song

He’s fingers curl into your hair and he gifts you a braid

Tying it off with a beat from his own hair

It means more to him than you’ll ever realise

But what’s even better is that you don’t take it out

And every time he sees it, he can’t but help feel butterflies

John Marston:

Dumb aura Marston

Definitely couldn’t figure out where you’re from

Consistently gets it wrong

At first your frustrated, upset that he can’t remember something so basic about you

It takes you a moment to realise he’s kidding with you and actually not that incompetent, just likes seeing you mad

You’ll get your revenge on him one way or another

His feelings definitely spark into existence when he sees you teaching Jack something about your heritage

Maybe showing him how to cook a certain dish

Reading him a certain fairy tale

He comes back to you sometime later in the evening

It’s dark and it feels like no ones about

Only a meek candle spluttering out light around you

The only secluded spot on camp

He asks you about what you were teaching Jack, asks you if you could teach him

At first you think he’s laughing at you but no

He’s completely serious

No mischievous glint in his eye, just a genuine interest

And he listens

And he remembers

It’s that moment that makes you think that maybe there’s more to John than you ever realised

requests open<3

masterlist

#Red Dead Redemption #Red Dead Redmeption #red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption imagine #red dead redemption two #rdr2 #rdr #rdr imagine #rdr oneshot #rdr2 imagine #rdr2 oneshot #dutch #Dutch Van Der Linde #dutch x reader #dutch x oc #dutch imagine #dutch van der linde x reader #dutch van der linde imagine #dutch van der linde onshot #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan imagine #arthur morgan x original character #arthur morgan x oc #arthur morgan oneshot #javier escuella #javier escuella x reader #javier excuella x oc #javier escuella onshot #javier escuella imagine

[glacecakes]

Revenge is Sweet but You're Sweeter

Andrew kidnaps Hugo to get back at Varian.

Warning for blood, torture, general violence. Nothing too graphic. GOD THIS TOOK FUCKING FOREVER TO GET OUT. Basically my cat had a cancer scare and my depression is at an all time high so I was unable to get anything done. I wasn't happy with this fic for most of it until I sat my ass down and said I Will Finish This If It Kills Me. I'm still not THRILLED with this piece but it's finished and fuck it it's done i'm DONE I HAVE DEADLINES.

-

Hugo’s vision blurred into existence after a few blinks. As far as he could tell, he was trapped in some old barn, arms trapped behind his back. He flexed, tugging at the restraints on his hands. The ropes burned his wrists, but they didn’t budge. His legs scrambled in an attempt to stand, but it didn’t work, and he was stuck still on the floor. His eyes scanned the vicinity, trying to gauge his surroundings.

“What the…” he mumbled. His eyes blinked asynchronously as he struggled to focus.

How the heck did this even happen?

The last thing Hugo remembered was that he was talking to Nuru and Yong, sharing some hot cocoa while Varian got some more firewood. They were talking about Varian’s unusually anxious behavior as of late. He was already an anxious guy, but ever since he got a letter from home, he’d been a wreck. He started looking over his shoulder constantly and even sleeping with a weapon by his side. And anytime any of the three asked, Varian would abruptly change the subject.

“What if we all asked him about it? Like, at once?” Yong asked.

Hugo bit his lip. If he were in Varian’s position, he wouldn’t want to spill. He doesn’t want his position compromised, and Varian likely didn’t want the same done to him.

That’s what he told himself, anyway. He definitely did not have a crush on Varian and wanted to keep Varian as close as possible for as long as possible.

He moved to object, but Nuru and raised her mug in agreement.

“When he gets back, we’ll confront him. Something’s bothering him, and we’re his friends. We only want to help.”

Help, or bother? To Hugo it felt like they were too nosy for their own good, and were excusing it as concern. But hey what did he know. Not like he had many friends before them. He’d thrown back the cocoa in quiet acceptance, said goodnight to the others… and now…

Moonlight filtered in through the barn’s broken windows and decaying roof, seeping into every crack and filling the room with shadows.

A shadow from which a man stepped out.

His hair was slightly greasy, yet kept in an immaculate bun. A long, well-groomed beard did little to hide the feral grin on his face. He sauntered across creaking floors, circling around the teen like a shark. He carried a sword which left imprints on the floorboards,

Hugo puffed his chest up in defense. He wasn’t going to be intimidated by this… kidnapper? Assailant? Whatever he was he looked like a jerk.

“Finally you’re all awake. I was worried I’d used too much.”

“Too much?”

“Sleeping powder. Just sprinkled it into your water supply when you weren’t looking. Child’s play, really.” The man laughed, resuming his pacing.

Hugo cursed internally. He let his guard down and paid the price. Being with the trio of hooligans he called friends made him soft, as Donella would’ve said. How long had this man been following them? How long had he waited to strike, judging them and gauging every opportunity, deciding that tonight was perfect to attack mere teens? He just hoped the other three were safe.

Wait, no. Don’t think that. Remember Hugo, you don’t care about them. They’re a means to an end.  

As Hugo’s eyes adjusted to the dim barn, he began to notice more silhouettes creeping in the dark. They slowly joined their comrade, as if summoned. They were of varying shapes and sizes, age and creed. They were dressed too poorly to be bounty hunters, looking more like weary travellers. Further back, near a large hole in the barn roof, was a hot air balloon. It was likely how the teen was transported here. A floorboard splintered under the largest man’s weight.

“Who are you?” Hugo barked. “What do you want with me?”

“You mean your friend never mentioned us?” A short woman asked, stepping up to him and patting his head in mock sympathy. “You poor sheep, travelling with a wolf.”

He recoiled at her touch, nose scrunching up and eyes screwing shut. Her hot breath tickled the strands of hair on his neck.

“We are the separatists of Saporia. I’m the leader, Andrew.” The man bowed. “I hope you don’t mind that we… borrowed you for the evening?”

Ah, Saporia. Something about rebels against Corona, right? Varian had mentioned them in passing once. His face had screwed into pure disgust at seeing a crest painted on a wall in Bayagnor.

“Pricks,” He’d muttered, throwing a goo bomb to destroy the paint.

Likely this guy had beef with Donella, which meant it was up to Hugo to get himself out of here safely. He wondered what she did to earn this anger.

“Yea sure, love getting kidnapped by washed up Coronans,” Hugo snapped, bracing for the inevitable smack that followed. The other kidnappers laughed at his pain. He’d seen this scenario many times under Donella. Sometimes he was the victim, sometimes he was the instigator. But it always worked the same. Those who tried to play the hero, those who tried to resist, they always got the worst of the treatment.

Sure enough, Andrew snapped his fingers, and his cronies descended.

“Hope you don’t mind, we have to… prepare you for our guest of honor.”

-

How long did he sit there, taking hit after hit? They were never intense, rather a series of mildly painful blows that built up over time. Andrew refused to let his compatriots hurt him too much.

“He needs to stay alive and intact.” He said. “Save the broken bones for our dear old friend.”

That didn’t stop any of it from hurting. It didn’t stop the blood that trickled down his nose from a particularly nasty punch, nor the stinging of Andrew’s knife across his back. One eye was beginning to swell shut, and his ribs, while not broken, still ached from repetitive kicks. Individually, it was nothing Hugo couldn’t handle. But combined, the wounds were starting to wear him down.

He never let it show though. If his tormentors got wind of his breaking will, they’d mock him to no end. He had to keep his chin up and show he was better than them. That’s what Don taught him, anyway. Either play up the child act and gain their pity, or stay determined. But above all, never give away information.

He never played hero normally. But then again, he was usually the youngest, the favorite. Donella would let heads roll if her cronies let Hugo suffer when they could take the hit. It was her way of showing she cared, in a twisted way.

In this scenario, he had to be the hero. There would be no sympathy shown, there hadn’t been so far. No, he’d have to figure this out on his own. Yong and Nuru could come save him, sure, but he didn’t want them to risk it. Not that he cared about them or anything! It was just… they were likely to fail. Right?

Oh who was he kidding. Hugo didn’t want to get the others involved.

Responsiblity sucked. How does Varian do it?

BANG!

“ANDREW!”

Speak of the devil.

The door to the barn was blasted open, revealing Varian filled with a fury the likes of which the other had never seen. His eyes were wild, pupils like pin pricks. He rapidly scanned the area, softening only slightly when he saw Hugo was alive, only to reignite to even further anger when he saw Hugo’s current state. His chest rose and fell with rapid breaths, indicating he ran here.

Andrew spread his arms wide, greeting Varian like he was visiting for dinner, as opposed to holding his friend hostage. “You made it! I was worried you didn’t get my message.”

Varian held up a piece of paper. The words were impossible to make out from afar, but the implications sent shivers down the spine. “I got your note.” He growled, crumpling the paper in one hand and tossing it to the floor. “Now what do you want?” His voice was venom.

It sounded a lot like Donella, in Hugo’s opinion.

Andrew’s companions slinked ever closer, forming a semi circle behind the prisoner, while Andrew saunted up close to Varian.

To say Hugo was shocked was an understatement. He’d never seen raw fury like that from the normally awkward and intelligent alchemist. And apparently he knew this guy, which meant it was not about getting revenge on Donella.

What had Varian done to get himself an enemy like this?

“Oh come on, I can’t say hi to an old friend?”

“We are not friends. ”

“We were, at some point.” Andrew hummed, wrapping an arm around Varian. “Such a shame. And I think you know what I want.” The younger was as tense as a stone. He sent a death glare up at the man and didn’t answer the question.

He patted Varian’s cheek condescendingly. It was a facsimile of the constant, warm touches of home. Varian wanted to throw up.

Varian grit his teeth, shoving Andrew off and backing up towards his friends. A hand slipped into his pocket, preparing to throw down a bomb, but one of the goons surged forward. His broad muscles pinned Varian to the floor, cheek falling with a loud smack. The bomb rolled across the floor.

He flailed his feet, akin to a rabid animal, but it was no use. The man drug Varian to the wall where previously unnoticed shackles glinted in the moonlight. Each cuff was wrapped around Varian’s wrists. He pulled, able to get about a meter away from the wall, but that was as far as it let him.

"Oh come on," Andrew said, circling around Varian like a snake ready to swallow its prey. "You act like you’re all mature now, but I’ve seen the real you. Deep down, you're still the same naive, evil brat I met in prison."

Prison? When did Varian go to prison?

Varian's body shook with fury. "I am nothing like you." He growled.

"Are you sure about that? Didn't you do the same thing I did?" He fiddled with a knife, getting into Varian's personal space and dragging the weapon down Varian's cheek. "We both wanted something, so we kidnapped the one our target holds dear. And we both threatened to kill them if they didn't cooperate."

Hugo felt his insides turn to ice.

“I want,” Andrew whispered, leaning up to Varian’s face, hot breath ghosting across his cheeks. “For you to suffer.”

Varian met his friend’s gaze, and his body shook with barely hidden disgust. He’d let Andrew hurt the ones he loved once before, he’ll be damned if he lets it happen again. From the looks of it though, he was too late. Guilt and anger bubbled in his stomach like a volcano.

“Don’t worry, goggles,” Hugo said, keeping his voice steady. “I’ve had way worse. Trust me, it’s like kitten scratches.”

Varian’s eyes twinkled with unshed tears, yet he smiled, bunny teeth peeking out from between his lips. “You look like shit.” A faint blush spread across his cheeks. Even now, covered in bruises and blood, Hugo still managed to take Varian’s breath away.

If we get out of this, he vowed to himself, I’m going to tell him how I feel.

For a brief moment, he glanced down at his hands, and then back up at Hugo. The older teen followed with his eyes and allowed a small smile.

A bobby pin.

He put his hands behind his back, to prevent anyone from seeing.

Distract him, Varian mouthed.

How? Hugo hissed back.

Varian shrugged. The older alchemist rolled his eyes.

“Hey Andy, was it?” Hugo raised his head to stare Andrew down. He let a familiar facade slide into place. “Ya mind explaining why I’m here?”

Varian’s eyes widened, and he banged his head against the wall in frustration. Not like that! He thought.

“Like I get that he’s here to suffer or whatever,” He raised his eyebrows to imitate quotation marks. “But uh. I don’t get why you need me. Maybe I’m just not smart enough to understand your plan.”

It was a cheap shot, appealing to the ego, but it did the trick. Andrew seemed like the type to gloat and monologue, and sure enough, he slunk across the room towards Hugo, a pep in his step.

“See, it’s quite simple, really. Varian here… well. He hurt us a while back.” Varian rolled his eyes, but made no comment. With the attention off of him, he picked at the lock. The soft clinks of the metal were easily ignored.

“For a while, I thought that if I ever saw him again, I’d make good on my promise, and splatter his body on the ruins of Corona.”

“Yea good luck with that last bit.” Hugo rolled his eyes. “So what, I was just bait?”

“Oh no,” Andrew’s grin was near maniacal. “We figured death was too light of a punishment. No. If there’s one thing the kid never shut up about, it’s family. Oh, I love my dad, ooh I can’t wait until we find a way to free him, ooh those darn royals tore my family apart blah blah blah. So what better torture…”

He slashed Hugo’s cheek with the knife. Blood oozed out the cut as Hugo hissed in pain. From the corner of his eye he saw Varian flinch, arms shaking as he tried to pick the locks faster.

“...Than to force him to watch us kill the ones he loves most?”

The word love and Hugo were not commonly used together, let alone when talking about Varian. And yet… Hugo’s stomach fluttered at the idea. He was a loved one? It seemed almost impossible, but he could see the frantic energy Varian exuded as he tried to work as quietly and discreetly as possible.

No, he probably just means friend… right?

What if he doesn’t, a traitorous voice whispered. What if it’s exactly what you think it means?

He couldn’t help it. “Varian?” He asked, voice soft.

The younger alchemist gave him a sheepish smile, hiding his hands behind his back.

A mental war was raging in Varian’s head. Every fiber of his being screamed to save Hugo, go to him, protect him, but he couldn’t do that while cuffed. The only way to save Hugo was to keep the attention off himself and solely on Hugo. He couldn’t let Andrew see what he was doing.

“Aw, how sweet,” Andrew crooned. He leveled the sword and Hugo’s chin, redirecting his gaze. His soft expression morphed into a scowl of defiance.

With the sword still at his jaw, Andrew shoved his fist into Hugo’s stomach. The wind was knocked out of him, but Hugo kept his head steady. Any sudden movements could mean he bled out.

Varian let out a whine.

He had to focus.

After a few more seconds, the first cuff was open.

“Trying to play it cool, huh?” Andrew stood to his full height, dropping the sword. He loomed over Hugo and grit his teeth. The man was no longer in a playing mood. He wanted Varian to suffer, and by god the kid was gonna suffer sooner rather than later.

He raised his boot, and slammed the toe into Hugo’s face with a crunch . His glasses cracked on impact. His head hit the wooden beam with enough force to rattle his skull.

Andrew gripped his neck and squeezed. The air escaped Hugo in a rush and he moaned in protest.

Varian couldn’t suppress the scream that pushed its way out. The still intact chain rattled with his tugs.

“Andrew please,” His voice shook on the second word. “Let him go. It’s me you hate.”

“Did you not listen? You’re a smart kid, Varian. I’m going to kill him, and then I’m going to kill everyone else you love. ” His fingers tightened around Hugo’s neck, and he turned back to the older teen.

Hugo’s vision was darkening. “Varian,” He wheezed.

The second cuff snapped off.

And Varian lunged.

With an inhuman cry, he toppled Andrew, sending the man sprawling onto the floor. They rolled onto the floor until Varian was on top. Quick as a flash, he grabbed the discard sword and put it to Andrew’s neck.

Hugo gasped for breath, coughing as sweet air filled his lungs. He blinked the dark spots out of his eyes.

The other Saporians ran to help their leader, but faltered at the sword.

“Stay back!” Varian screamed. He pushed it deeper into Andrew’s neck, nearly drawing blood. “Release him!” He ordered. “Let Hugo go or I kill him right here, right now!”

“You wouldn’t,” Andrew snarled. Varian’s glare pierced his very soul, and the furious teen smacked him across the face.

Damn that felt good.

The last time Varian had been this angry… god, it might’ve been when he was 14. When he saw how happy Rapunzel was with her family, while his own suffered, while he withered away and turned to ash.

The Saporians were quick to obey, one of the taller men untying Hugo. He slid down the pole, grabbing at his throat with his now free hands. His wrists were stained red with ropeburn.

Slowly, he stood to his feet on shaky legs, leaning against the pillar for support.

Satisfied, Varian turned back to Andrew, who was smiling.

“What are you so happy about?” the alchemist hissed.

Andrew laughed. “You really haven’t changed a bit.”

Varian’s eyes narrowed. He slammed the hilt of the sword into Andrew’s head, and the man fell unconscious. He stood off of him.

The other separatists did nothing. They knew what he was capable of. Without any leverage, without their leader, it was a losing battle. Especially now that Hugo was free.

Pointing the sword at the Saporians, he said, “Next time, I won’t let you guys go alive.” He slammed it down into the floorboards with a huff.

“Now get out of my sight.”

-

The walk back to the campsite was quiet for the most part.

Hugo was leaning on Varian heavily, one arm wrapped around Varian’s neck and the other clutching at his waist. Everytime he staggered or tripped, Varian’s grip tightened ever so slightly.

His eyes were stone cold, but never directed at Hugo. If he saw Hugo looking, Varian’s eyes softened, glittering under the stars. It was nearing daybreak. The smoke from their campsite was now visible.

The tents came into view, and Hugo’s entire form sagged in relief. He was so ready to drop into bed and not wake up for 12 hours, but he needed medical care.

Nuru and Yong had long gone to bed, blissfully unaware of what had transpired. The next hour was quiet as well, Varian silently tending to the most serious ones. It was a tender moment, their own little world. A bubble that would be broken by speaking. So for now, Hugo was silent. He let Varian dab at the blood under his nose, let him remove his glasses for safekeeping, let his breath trail over Hugo’s cheeks as they both blushed.

At last, the worst was over.

“So…” Hugo finally said. “That was… something.”

Varian snorted. “Understatement.”

“We gonna talk about what just happened? Any of it?”

“Which parts do you want to talk about?”

Hugo hummed. “I mean I’d like to know what the fuck that guy was…” Varian turned green. “But not right now.”

Varian breathed a sigh of relief. “Then, what?”

Hugo bit his lip, preparing for the worst. “You love me…?”

“Oh…” Varian’s face lit up bright red. His eyes averted, looking anywhere but Hugo. “I-I mean… maybe not love… not yet at least. Not that I hate you! No, I…” He winced. “I… like you. A lot.” He moaned. “That was the worst confession ever please stab me now.”

Hugo laughed. He couldn’t help it. After everything that had happened today, from kidnapping to torture to this , it was so overwhelming and horrible and also so perfect.

“How about, instead of that…” He said. “I uh… say I feel the same? Not love yet, I don’t think but… if you wanna try and get to that point?”

The sun rose behind Varian as he smiled. “I’d like that a lot.”

#tangled #varian #tangled the series #varigo #varian and the seven kingdoms #varian and the seven kingdoms au #hugo the human #tts #tts varian

[sovio-studio]

To understand a ghost kid

[Maddie decides to interrogate Phantom in a final effort to discover his ghost obsession. The conversation ends up taking a more emotional turn than she expected]

~~~

"You won't be getting out anytime soon. That's a new anti ghost-power design."

Danny struggled in the luminous green net for a few seconds more before ultimately resigning with a sigh.

"I thought things were going well! You haven't tried to capture me for months."

His mother seemed surprised at his remark. She probably hadn't thought he'd paid much attention to their truce, thanks to her prejudices about ghosts not having emotions all together. However, she composed herself quickly as usual.

"A deal is a deal, I don't plan to harm you this time."

"This time?"

She ignored him. "I need to ask you some questions?"

"Then just ask me! No need for the stupid net." He retorted, pushing against the net once more.

"The net is a precaution. I can't have you running away before you can answer."

"Geez what kinda question is this?"

"It's about your origins. How you died to be more precise"

"Oh… oh! My er-" He settled uncomfortably onto the ground in a cross legged position, despite the net. This would be interesting. "Why do you need to know about that anyway?"

"We've recently been trying to make connections between ghosts, their obsessions, and their deaths. Majority we have solid hypotheses, and a couple we've even confirmed." Now that, Danny was curious about. They actually managed to track down who some of his enemies were before death?

"Go on." She seemed surprised but excited by his will to listen.

"Ghosts come from a range of eras which comes across in their mannerisms, and their passion at time of death is their obsession, which becomes more warped overtime. Whether it be passion as in love or their career, or as in revenge or desperate wants."

Maddie paused her pacing and glanced over to see if he was still listening. He was. She continued, now stood resolutely still.

"You are one of the very few anomalies we found"

"How so?"

He could guess.

"You have no indicators of how you died. Not only do you use modern speech and even slang, you wear a modern hazmat suit, that looks strikingly like ours at that."

That's cause it is.

"So I have two questions. When did you die, and what's your obsession?"

Danny wasn't sure if she was pausing for an answer or not. It was likely her way of testing his cooperativeness, but he had a question of his own.

"I appreciate your curiosity but this doesn't seem like the kind of thing you'd go through the trouble of trapping me for. Why do you really want to know this?"

Maddie walked closer to the net, her calm pace and lack of a weapon showing the gain of trust the two had gotten over the months, even if it wasn't perfect.

"That's pretty simple: I'm a scientist. I do research. And while I can't do physical tests on you as I originally wanted, I can at least do as much research as I can into how ghosts work without that. And your obsessions are extremely important to this." She leaned down towards him as he was still on the floor and pointed a finger upwards, like a teacher telling off a preschooler. Danny bit back an amused smirk. "You seem to break the clear rules that have worked just fine so far, so what I need to know is why."

"You didn't say anything about me breaking any rules."

Maddie stood back up straight and crossed her arms, Danny carefully stood up to join her as she talked.

"You've broken a few. The main being that you seem to have no obsession. My first assumption was that your heroics where just that. It would explain your desperate need to help people and likely meant your last moments involved saving someone, or wishing to be saved yourself."

That made Danny think. Had he wished someone could save him back during the accident? It was a pretty likely reaction considering how much that amount of energy had hurt, but he'd never considered it actually altering his perception or feelings.

"But," his mother's continuation snapped him back to the present, "I ruled that out. In most cases ghosts will stop at nothing to stick to their obsessions, including contradicting other aspects of themselves, or making unlikely alliances, excetera. But while I've observed carefully, every time I've encountered you over the last three weeks, you will often go on unusual tangents."

Tangents...?

~~~

Based on the look in the ghosts eyes he didn't know what she meant. He likely just hadn't recognised that his own behaviour was unusual. Not surprising, but she couldn't make any judgements until this mystery was resolved.

"In short, you aim to help people, but will go off elsewhere to finish a fight, or alternate between fights. You've also paused battles altogether to chat or tease your opponent. And how frequently you are late and disappear after or during fights or helping people. Whatever the reasons for that are, a ghost typically should follow their obsession no matter what, and at all times. In other words, you can get distracted which isn't right."

Not right for ghosts at least. It was definitely more of a human trait, but she left that out.

"So what's your next theory? Or do you have some explanation in mind for why I'm different?" Maddie looked intently back at Phantom to see an incredibly focused expression that was rare on the young spirit. He was strongly invested in this topic, but she couldn't tell why. Did he know something she didn't that had an impact on her theories?

"I had a couple other hypotheses for your obsession that fell through for basically the same reasons." She crouched down to unpin the net, carefully slinging it off of him. She was confident he wouldn't leave at this point. He watched it fall and smiled gratefully, but didn't try to move. "That's why I decided to ask you personally. Though I wasn't sure it'd be something you were willing to talk about."

"Why, because it supposedly involved my death?" He promotes. She hadn't expected him to be so blunt about it but,

"Yes, mostly. Do you actually have any memory of it? If you don't mind me asking?" Honestly that was the question she had wanted to start with. Phantom merely looked away in thought. Not as if he was avoiding it or recalling something, more like he was contemplating. Perhaps he was deciding how to explain.

"I… I remember having a family. And friends." He finally responded. She didn't fill the silence between his sentences hoping he'd add more detail. "I was just, erm, 14, and there was… an accident. It involved an explosion. Of sorts."

"An explosion?" That was awfully dramatic for just a child's death. He looked a little older than 14, but that part was sure believable.

"It was um, not a big one. A device in our home malfunctioned and I just happened to be around it at the time. It was a mistake." If it was an accident how could it also be a mistake? He was definitely leaving out some details but she couldn't bring herself to pry. This was clearly a touchy subject, for obvious reasons.

"So you do remember." He seemed to be startled back into reality and he looked back up at her, the energetic green glow she hadn't noticed had been gone until just now quickly coming back into his eyes.

"Yeah- sort of. It's a little fuzzy."

"Does anything about what you remember give us any clues to what your obsession is?" In other words, what he thought about right before death. That part of the question didn't need saying for him to seemingly pick up on it.

"I don't know exactly, no, sorry. I'm as curious as you are to be honest."

"What about? Your obsession or your death?"

"Both?" Phantom answered vaguely with a shrug.

Maddie had also secretly been digging for any strange circumstances around his death. If they couldn't find a plausible obsession, maybe they could find the reason he didn't have one instead. But his description sounded pretty normal. A household accident. An electrical glitch most likely. While it wasn't a common cause of death it wasn't as erratic as getting mauled while illegally hunting a rare species or burning your house down with you inside it over a guy. There was nothing to go off there, except…

Maybe she'd have to pry a little after all.

~~~

"You said it was a mistake?" Danny pouted at the tricky question.

He'd carefully spun his freak portal accident into a more believable and unrelated tale. She'd managed to catch his little slip up after he had dazed off into the memory, but at this point he'd stick to his half-truth story. He wasn't a very good liar after all.

"It was my fault really. I wanted to show my friends something cool but we shouldn't have been there at all. At least it wasn't either of them that got hurt because of me."

He could tell she was a little frustrated at how vague he was being, but any further would be too much. He stopped there.

"Maybe regret has something to do with it?" After a long moment of awkward silence Maddie eventually resigned back to her theories. "Regret that you went somewhere you shouldn't, or more likely, regret that you died young."

Danny was a little startled by her conclusion. She'd said that last couple words so clearly; she was sure of this.

~~~

Phantom's reaction only made her feel more strongly that this was the one. It actually explained so much. He acted like a teenager: he was up to date on what kids are into and how they talk, plus he acts just like a kid often. Getting distracted all the time actually complimented this obsession instead of contradicting it. His whole heroics act wasn't really that much of an act, because that was just his innocent moral compass, that he miraculously maintained in death thanks to desperately wanting to continue living out his teenage years like his friends could. It's why he seemed so human. He practically still was one because his obsession was to remain human or 'alive', and making the most of his second chance at existing. It wasn't an exact answer but it was too clear now to argue with.

Maddie turned to the ghostly teenager. She could see him in a slightly different light now that she knew his drive really wasn't secretly malicious after all. Not that she'd truly believed that recently anyway.

"You seem pretty human sometimes, Phantom" she commented, smiling.

Phantom looked up at her suddenly and his eyes widened a little. He stared at her for a long moment, seeming nervous. After a moment, he blinked and wiped the expression off his face, but his shoulders still looked tense.

"Really?"

"Yeah. I think that has something to do with your obsession. It's the only good explanation for your more unexplainable behaviour ironically." Maddie admitted.

“Ah.” Phantom’s tension eased and he looked down at the floor. His eyes seemed tired... He didn't look relieved, more… disheartened? Had he been expecting something else? And had he wanted to hear that or not, as neither reaction had been positive. She resorted to asking a question she never thought she'd be asking a ghost. Let alone one she spent half a year trying to catch and examine.

~~~

"Are you okay?" Danny heard Maddie ask, her strongest motherly tone coming through clearly now. He didn't look up at her yet, afraid he'd see her concerned expression and just break character completely.

"I'm alright, thanks. It's just been a slightly different conversation than I expected."

"Alright. I suppose this topic is hard on you. I know you might not think you can trust me but I'm here to talk if you need it okay?"

Danny smiled. She'd said this to him a million times before. "I know mom. Thanks."

~~~

#danny phantom #danny fenton #maddie fenton #danny phantom fanfiction