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fumifooms · 1 month

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I don’t like minimizing the importance and gravity of Laios and Toshiro’s fight into just being a childish squabble, even if to a degree it is framed that way, because to both of them it has a lot of personal significance and emotional weight and runs very deep to their characters… The fight isn’t nothing it’s a LOT, they made up but it’s not something easy to express and to get over for either of them which makes it all the more meaningful! I’m on both sides but there very much are sides, there’s no "they’re both having a ball, Toshiro and Laios hand in hand yay" side to the fight, that comes after

The fight with Toshiro WAS very scary to Laios, almost existentially so, but it’s moreso the "I thought I’d made a friend!!" bit and my god. My god actually

Like it’s not "just" about oh his friend liking him less than he thought, THAT IS SO MUCH. It’s a bond he thought he had being a lie it’s all the time and moments spent together either being a lie from his perspective or marred now looking back. It’s not only being upset at Toshiro for lying but upset at himself that he’s so easy to fool, it’s being upset that there’s something so wrong with you that you can’t even tell if your "close buddy" even actually likes you or not, it’s like. Holding my head. He can’t trust his own vision of events that happened do you see. There’s always this film of distrust that it could be a lie that should be there when he interacts with people there’s always this sense of cloak and dagger to expect backstabs out of nowhere because you CAN’T see it coming you CAN’T you CAN’T there’s something about you which makes it impossible so you CAN’T-

He’s so scared of not being able to read people. He knows it’s a weak spot he has, he’s always known. All of these bits are centered around social expectations and betrayals, the assumption that he doesn’t belong either in society or with other humans.

And Laios’ level of awareness is actually sort of complex to analyze, but it’s there, there’s how out of him and Falin he was the one sensitive to the ~aura of hatred~ he felt from the townspeople, there’s of course his nightmares whispering to him about the mocking looks, and how yeah actually he realizes that his gold stripper coworker was taking advantage of him. There’s of course the Winged Lion speech about his trauma and how he fundamentally mistrusts/dislikes humans to some deep seated degree, this distrust that he still keeps under control always. There’s how pre-canon he often wanted to suggest eating monsters but never worked up the courage to bring it up with the others. There’s how he gets across as stoic when he isn’t being enthusiastic…… We don’t know how aware and wary he is exactly in the moment but we do know he has some anxiety around social stuff, and looking back he does notice and aughh augh, the sense you have to hide yourself to not get hurt and be on your guard and shit and.

When you don’t know what to look out for and when to look out for it, the general ‘common sense’ of not always trusting people or noticing when someone’s messing with you becomes hypervigilance in social settings

"Man they really know what you hate huh". Being socially unaware literally plagues him, he knows, he knows it so well.

It’s so quick that it’s almost hard to digest how literal and blatant Laios summoning his monster to crush all the people who’ve hurt him is. His literal go-to coping mechanism for comfort in his literal monster-induced emotionally intense nightmares, saving him by taking away the upsetting element (the humans)

"Monsters are his coping fantasy, where they can whisk him away from humanity, all the hurt it’s caused him and its arbitrary rules" with the subtlety of a brick. Monsters are his comfort safe zone "because they kill humans" yes but no it’s because he pits them as the guardians against humans who to him are in the role of the agressors. To him they represent freedom from the shackles of what it means to be part of humanity, a fundamentally social species

#Fumi rambles #Was asked to post this but a lot of this is present in my shuro-Laios fight analysis from Laios’ pov #Bite sized fumi #Laios touden #Meta #happy nightmare chapter day #Character analysis #Spoilers #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #And humanity being a social species is ofc ultimately not shown as a negative.#Dunmeshi is about unity and coming together when seeking to understand that which you do not!!!#But yeah like imagine if you will that you can never really trust your own perspective of events because you literally can’t tell #Wether the person likes you or hates you and you just can’t tell. Even when they ARE being obvious about it #The nightmare scene is so real like I def have vivid memories where I’m like ‘Ah yeah they cringed here #that should have been a dead giveaway’. It wears on self-esteem and self-trust. Like “you don’t belong in society” in a way they’re #sorta like factually not wrong and like. Oh ok man. Sitting down #Just spitballing here obvi. Personal experience. Hey did you guys know that dunmeshi is good. Man. It’s good #Dungeon meshi #Analysis #Feeling The Owl House Gus meltdown episode in tha club tonight #Sobbing about how the flashbacks we see of Laios’ childhood are only happy when it centers around Falin or the dogs

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doodlesfromthebird · 5 days

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[OCs] Married life

#OCs #character art #hey thanks all for the batch of asks i got about these guys it really warms my heart :)#also special thanks for the one anon in particular who pointed out the typos in a previous post LMAO

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luck-of-the-drawings · 1 month

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"I think this is the most inhuman; and human, that I've ever felt.." MUCH CAN HAPPEN IN A YEAR. IN FIVE YEARS. A DECADE. imagine how much can happen in a century. just ONE (1). How will you grow? what phases do you find? even in 5 years, you will find patterns.

#jrwi fanart #jrwi show #jrwi suckening #jrwi suckening spoilers #jrwi the suckening #arthur bennett #HEY SO THE REALLY FUNNY THING THAT THE CHARACTER DID THAT SEEMED RLY SILLY N GOOFY IN THE MOMENT?#LIKE THE WHIPLASH BETWEEN SERIOUS N SILLY ALMOST PISSED YOU OFF? WHAT IF I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE YOU SAD ABOUT IT #this was meant to be a scribble that would be a bigger part of a bigger page.might leave it on that page.#but still. bc o that i nearly posted it onto my wacky side blog.BUT NAYY I SPENT TOO MUCH TIME N ENERGY N YOU GOTTA SEE IT #ARTHUR BENNETT DRIVES ME CRAZY. I FEEL LIKE ITS ODD FOR HIM TO BE SO TECHNOLOGICALLY OUT OF TOUCH #WHERE HAS HE BEEN. HAS HE BEEN IN WAR? IS THAT WHERE MAGNUS CAME FROM? WHERE WAS HE WHEN HE WAS WITH EDWARDS CREW?#ARTHURRR I HAVE QUESTIONS ARTTHUUURR!! HEY CAN I ALSO ASK; WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU BECOME #DO YOU THINK HE HAD ANY IDEA HE WOULD VEER CLOSER AND CLOSER TO THE MONSTER HE DESPISES. ALL BC HE DESERVES IT. OR WATEVER #HE FASCINATES ME SO MUCH. TO LOOK AT THE STONE COLD STOIC FOOL FROM THE START OF THE SHOW #AND TO FIND OUT THAT HE USED TO BE A BAD BOY.. A DELINQUENT... A LIL PRANKSTER.... MY GODDD THATS ADORABLE #I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW MORE.... BUT I DOUBT THE LAST EPISODE IS GONNA ANSWER THOSE QUESTIONS..i love arthur bennett so much....#AS FOR THE ART!! i mostly used the fire alpaca watercolor brush. tbh im not a brush guy. anti aliased default pen tends to be my main game #but LATELY IM SQQQUIRMIN OUT OF AN ARTBLOCK so expirimenting like this is helping #DONT LOOK TOO HARD AT IT!! im still proud tho. colors are fun :3 im also very proud of the backgrounds #I LOVE THE CARTOON THING where the background looks all fancy n painted but the characters are solid colors #what else can i ramble abt. OH YEAH. i looked up the bikes to make sure they were time accurate tehehehe. 1913 to 2012.#almost a century apart!! isnt that neat? ALSO FUUUCK CAN I JUST MAKE A QUICK CONFESSION. DOWN HERE IN MY TAGS.#only the strongest can read my tags anwyay. SO I REALIZED WHY I LOVE ARTHUR SO MUCH. TIME IS A FLAT CIRCLE #while arthur is a Stoic and Cool vampire w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORs #THERE HAPPENS TO BE A ROBOT FROM A BAND W A TITANIUM ALLOY SPINAL COLLUMN #WHOS A Stoic and Cool ROBOT w a knack for being playful/silly; who alsos been alive fora century thus witnessing HORRORS #the fuckkkiiinnngggnn The Spine from steam powered giraffe. WHATEVER. i cant escape from my heart. i guess.#i think The Spine and Arthur could be friends. Arthur saw the band perform back when they were the Steam Man Band #EDIT: WOOPS I DIDNT REALIZE THIS WOULD END UP IN THE SPG TAG. HI GUYS DIDNT KNOW U WERE STILL ALIVE SORREE 4 THE CROSS CONTAMINATION

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rosielav · 1 year

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Rosie's Favorite (currently finished/caught up) Podcasts:

The Amelia Project - silly, quirky, morbid but almost always more jaunty and eccentric than completely dark. Great for anyone who loves 'narrator' or interview type podcasts. If I'm not mistaken, I've posted some of my thoughts on here using the pod's hashtag.

The Mistholme Museum of Mystery, Morbitity, and Mortality - another narrator type podcast, and probably my favorite of all time. The main voice you hear is perfect imo and keeps you engaged in all the right ways, bringing tension where it's needed, and levity where it's funny or odd. Absolutely consumed this podcast with a voraciousness I haven't felt for a bit. Keeps you guessing and always wanting more from every exhibit.

Victoriocity - excellent voice acting, interesting and unique premise and setting, and great plot. One of the podcasts I'm most looking forward to returning :) think steam punk but also it's the 1800s still in weird ways. If you love an old timey British accent, you'll love this haha.

The White Vault - probably my favorite specifically horror podcast, that makes you wait for answers in a craving sort of way, a longing to know what's going on, and not slogging through a bunch of filler to then get answers. It's great, gorey, geographically diverse fun. Interesting mashups of various cultures re: mythology, history, religion(?). Another on my list to watch out for the return of.

Midnight Burger: the quick pitch is - a time traveling diner that always services people in need, no matter what time, space, or dimension they may reside in. Excellent cast of characters, great development, wonderful implementation of a new character(s), and in general a very comfortable vibe to return to (speaking of, once I run out of recommendations I may relisten to this one). Highly recommend if you like sitcoms with time travel splashed with a bit of horror.

Edit: just finished up another one, so time to add it to the list!!

Monstrous Agonies: A radio show advice segment, about, by, and for the Creature Community. If you like WTNV, but find it a bit intense sometimes, or a bit too plot heavy/etc, you'll absolutely love this. Instead of the whole show, you just get the advice segment, but oh ho ho, is it so much more than that. If you're queer, BIMPOC, from a blended/mixed/broken/anything but 'typical' home... I think you'll like it. Very much what I would call 'easy listening', meaning you can just ease into an episode without having to remember a huge cast of characters, a plots b plots C plots meta plots... And it just feels *real*, in that strange and beautiful way WTNV does, but instead of a fictional town, the setting is the real world, with real problems, and real solutions. Sometimes you really do just need to howl or cry or chew on some slippers and that's OK. Highly recommend for ADHD havers or anyone with a short attention span who loves a soothing voice.

Edit: Another absolute banger to add to the list

Wooden Overcoats - how do I even properly describe the experience of this podcast. Let's start with the basics: It's the story of twins who run a funeral parlor on a small island, in a small village. Their family has been running said parlor for hundreds of years, as the only funeral directors on the island. Until one day... They aren't. A man arrives and sets up his own funeral parlor directly across the square, and boy, do things change for those twins. If you've listened to (and loved) Victoriocity, or The Amelia Project, I guarantee you'll enjoy this one. Strange, silly, and interesting things are always happening, except this one doesn't have quite as much drama (well...... Perhaps a different kind of drama. I'd call this an interpersonal dramedy, with emphasis on the comedy). An incredible listen, through and through. I thoroughly enjoyed every single episode, and the ending was quite safisfying :)

Another EXCELLENT addition to this ever increasing list of content!!! I'm not even finished with this one, I just love it so much that I can't help but add it to the list:

Mission Rejected - you know in those spy movies, where the spy gets a secret message from HQ and they say 'your mission, if you choose to accept it...' ok great. Now imagine if 007 said 'no'. This is the story about the backups, the team that takes the missions rejected by the Top Spy Guy. It's got diverse voice acting (in many senses of the word - you can tell the voices apart, it's not exclusively straight cis white dudes, etc etc), wonderful worldbuilding, great pacing, an excellent plot, I really could go on and on. I highly recommend this specific podcast to anyone who wants something light to get deeply invested in, that has a lot of comedy but also develops the characters outside of just their bits. 100/10 no notes

Edit: not sure which podcast/podcast enthusiast rb'ed this yesterday but I'm so glad more folks get to see this list!!! It makes me so happy that lots of folks enjoy this list, a d share their fave ones, and!!!! Aaaggghhhhhhhhh!!! I love podcasts and podcast enthusiasts!!!!!

Also I have another one for yall :3 if you're looking for another improv comedy to add to your list!!!

Hey Riddle Riddle - exactly what you think it is, but also so much more. Three friends/coworkers who also happen to be sensational improv comedians solve riddles and puzzles together, while also introducing bits and skits and reoccurring segments, so it never feels like 'just a Riddle podcast' (whatever that means). I have laughed every single episode, which is a big deal for me (some comedy podcasts only make me laugh every few episodes, and I require at LEAST one laugh per episode). I can genuinely say this is one of the funniest podcasts I've ever listened to, and the absolute best improv I've ever heard. I'm all for committing to the bit, and this one absolutely delivers on both the commitment part and the bit part haha. Seriously can't recommend this one enough if you maybe listen to a lot of drama/horror and need something easy to listen to (easy meaning there's not a plot you have to be intensely listening for, you can just enjoy it casually). 1000/10, please listen and also tell me YOUR favorite riddles :)

#podcasts #podcast recommendation #Midnight Burger #victoriocity #the amelia project #the mistholme museum of mystery morbidity and mortality #the white vault #I spent a lot of time in Midnight burgers first episode wondering if Zebulon was Paul F Thompsons lmao #Anyways I love these podcasts please someone ask me about them #I desperately want to interact with more podcast people #Yell at me about podcasts #Ask me about my favorite characters or episodes #monstrous agonies #wooden overcoats #mission rejected podcast #Skip Grainger has made me realize what a blorbo truly is. I love this man. I love him so fucking much. With his little filing systems.#I want to scrunch him down and put him in my pocket forever I wanna just rotate him around in my brain he's the perfect lil guy #Finally a man i could truly feel safe around like... This man understands platonic love like no other man I've ever seen #hey riddle riddle

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automatonknight · 10 months

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id: a digital drawing of a blue engineer and walenty-an original character. walenty is pale, has long, black hair with horns, a tail and claws. he's wearing square glasses, fingerless gloves, a green, floral shirt over a black tank top and black shorts and shoes. kit is holding a fishing rod in kits right hand. engineer is wearing his hardhat and goggles, a blue shirt, dark blue overalls and brown boots. he also has a fishing rod swung over his shoulder. he and walenty are walking next to eachother, with walenty on the left and engie on the right. the background shows a pine forest. end id

#looks around. hi #art #fanart #dst oc #not superrrr happy with it but hey! it's something. or whatever #walenty also looks like that one philosopher image. having a deep conversation about constant's fish #i sketched this like. fucking ages ago when i first played that one REALLY fucking nice engie character mod i love it so much. i really wan #to draw his roseate skin sometimes too.....#actually let me check it out who made it #<goat slice! very nice mod. i'd say for someone more advanced if you wanna build the buildings and stuff but i fucking. suck at this game #and i was doing just fine so idk.+who cares about skill level. looks its my favorite guy from video game in another video game i like! yay!#^incomprehensible fucking tags sorry. bleeehh #ok bye. i might draw something with walenty and scout later though #ALSO. to that one anon who sent me an ask saying that a walenty and engie fishing trip would be cool....i love you forever from my heart

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carnivalcarriondiscarded · 9 months

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What do you struggle with the most when it comes to making an OC?

(Mine is giving them a name. Like..... I would create a cool looking character with some personality but then, I don't know what to name them. I'm even struggling with that as we speak.)

design, absolutely design. a lot of the time i have a name / personality / role / backstory for them Before knowing what they look like. coming up with a physical look to go with the character is a bitch & a half lol

#name is tough tho! i feel your struggles!#if i may offer some advice - coming from someone who has crafted literally hundreds of brain guys #ask yourself what their vibe is #like... do you think their name is short? do they seem like someone with a long name? an abbreviated name like A.J?#maybe they look like someone whose name starts with 'h'#look up h names and go from there #or another method is a bit tougher but hey it kinda works #clear your mind and look at the character #the first name that pops into your head is often the best choice #or yk... just sit there thinkin about them! maybe they're like. idk a bird #bird > birdie > birdly > billie #billie the bird!#ALSO LOOK UP BABY NAMES #there are sooooo many lists #you can look up lists with specific amount of letters. starting with [insert letter of your choice]. names with nicknames.#male. female. unisex. myth-based. animal based. plant based.#THERE'S A LIST OF NAMES FOR EVERYTHING I PROMISE #rambles from the bog #for example w/ my puppet sundown summer #i chose her name bc her color palette reminds me of a sunset & she has western inspiration & she's from a kid's show #so her name would be alliterative & sound cowboy-ish. sundown is more western than sunset #and then throw on the summer for the alliteration & friendly feel - kids automatically have positive associations with summer #see what i mean?#or take my murder man Aces - he's named after the diamond patterns on his body #(i associate the word ace with the ace of diamonds playing card)#or uhhhh i have a talking cat character named bartholomew #named so because i think it would be funny for this little talking cat to have a long & 'haughty' name that's also a cat pun. 'mew'#see there's no one way to go about it!!!#there's lots of methods and none of them are wrong!!#good luck and have fun my guy!

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delborovic · 1 year

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Can you draw Rellik and Del in an embrace?

(just wondering😇)

#I'm certain this is what you wanted anon <3 #monkey paw finger curls #I really need to stop feeding into these types of asks #but this made me laugh thinking about so I drew it #I don't ship myself with Rel obviously LOL #but hey whatever ships make ya'll happy please enjoy #Rellik has 0 comment on anything so #too bad for him #I am paranoid about posting things online #so please take this in the good fun spirit it was given #I'm honored anyone thinks at all about my silly characters hahaha #myself included #del replies #Rel is everyone's side guy that's so canon tho

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theokusgallery · 5 months

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Arsenic with these tbh... 👀

Having normal thoughts that normal people have

#i think i hauve covid #i need to draw something for this but im about to go to class so it'll unfortunately have to wait.......#ask #biocrafthero #arsenic #for later #now im picturing that as like. his assigned preferred weapon #because i keep talking about knives but as ive said before hes more of a 'blunt violence' typa guy #this would be perfect........#dont look at me im thinking of mutant and omen yomi hustle .#i main mutant because it looks sick and it has Pounce. i love Pounce. mutant also has visible claws #and my friend specifically sent me omen because they thought 'hey thats a nick-like mod character there'#mutant has claws and omen has acid... i think is so mutant-coded...#close-range combat with claws.......#...sorry this wasnt supposed to turn into a rant about the turn-based fighting game #anyway i think it fits him. very much.#and it would also be very practical for- say- removing one's eye from its socket #mmmmmmm...

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mineralboa · 2 days

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i love getting asks about characters i haven't thought about in years because my headcanons are the exact same as everyone elses at the time i joined the fandom

#this would be awesome to like..push myself to develop my own versions of characters but NO GEARS ARE turning in my head anymore dudes😭😭#i love the path ive taken with jeff #however #toby is still the “hey masky” guy to me😭😭 plz #never even thought about liu before i started posting creepypastas on this account because ive gotten A LOT of asks about #him and jeff but like. .yall i dont know that guy NSJDBDSJ

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ijusthavesomanyblorbos · 1 year

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SG Starbee?

ok so im pretty sure ur referring to the ship starscream x bumblebee? if there's a character named starbee that idk about im gonna feel silly... but i'm just gonna assume u mean the ship.

as far as characterizations, i really leaned into the whole "child solider" age thing w bumblebee. (as i'm writing this, i am realizing i have basically NEVER TALKED ABOUT STARSCREAM??? so i need to do that immediately someone please remind me cause i will forget.) anyways, for that reason i don't know if i would place him into a ship with anyone.

plus, post war (which is where i think most starbee ships take place), bee is maybe... probably... in prison??? so not in any place where he would meet starscream.

ok so that's my offical statement on the lore. BUT i'm assuming you only sent this ask in because you like the ship and wanna hear about it!! so, hypothetically, if starbee WAS a part of this universe:

starscream is basically the complete opposite of bee.

bee is a manipulative, traumatized, slightly crazed people pleaser that's been exploited since birth for the sake of an apathetic overlord that only cares for him as a tool. he has no friends. he's never had friends- and really, he doesn't even understand why.

meanwhile, starscream is every bit as annoying as he is in canon. he is disobedient and loud and RUDE, and everything bee has ever been punished for. he is very clearly Doing It Wrong, and yet somehow...... he's happy? he's cared for!

it's not fair. it's just not fair.

(what bee doesn't see is this- starscream, despite his many eccentricities, is genuinely caring, and protective of the people around him. he's loyal, and determined, and idealistic to a fault. and those traits, after 4 million years of war, have endeared him to a truly staggering amount of people.)

(bee also doesn't see this: starscream is about to endear himself to one more.)

post war- bee has been allowed to rejoin society, on the condition that he makes as big of a show of it as possible. he is to serve as an example for the autobots on how to reintegrate. (relegated to poster boy once again.)

starscream is assigned to be his "diplomatic partner" in a "unity promotion campaign" between the remaining leaders of the deception and autobot armies. (starscream is assigned to be his babysitter, to make sure he doesn't fly off the rails, and to take care of him if he does.)

now, the expectation here is that hopefully, starscream and bumblebee will manage to put aside their animosity long enough that people settle and reconstruction can begin. eventually, society will become stable enough that "unity promotion" is no longer necessary, and they can go their separate ways.

that is not what happens. starscream, shepard of the lost he is, takes one look at this lonely, angry, hurting soul and goes oh! guess he's mine now :)

over the course of the next few years, starscream teaches bee how to advocate for himself. (how to be more than someone's puppet.)

starscream shows him how to really live. (how to be more than just a soldier.)

starscream helps him understand that there's more to life then fighting, that you can make a place for yourself in the world without clawing your way up and carving it out by force. (how to rest.)

and how can bee not love him after that? in some ways, he's still not... normal. in some ways, he is just as obsessed and devoted to starscream as he was the autobot cause. really, bee has just traded one idol of worship for another.

but for the first time in bee's life, that devotion isn't going to be abused. he's given his obedience to someone who will never, ever use it. and that's what love is, i think.

so, starscream gets a scary ass guard dog (that is really just a lap dog in disguise)

and bumblebee gets what he always, always wanted.

bumblebee gets to be loved.

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just-some-guy-joust · 28 days

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yall cannot be going into the contestants of the oc joust's inboxes to talk shit about the other ocs...... like. i dont care as much if non contestants who aren't participating are doing it with each other because that's less likely to be seen by the oc creators. sending shit TO THE CREATORS is NOT acceptable. please, if you are going to shit on people, at least have the decency to keep it private

#if anybody does receive some kind of hate even for other characters and knows who did it #then let me know and I'll block them #won't make a big fuss about it i dont want Them getting harrassed either #but i appreciate being able to kick these people out of my follower list #if you are somebody who has done this hey. you're better than this ok?#keep it to dms with other non contestants. we can't see that #-mx narrative #some guy joust #sighs. im gonna be out most of the day #sorry if i dont catch propaganda or asks much today i gotta hang out with my mom #be nice to each other pretty please

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nocentis · 5 days

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Black Arum ┆ Siegrain

Content warning: main character death, cannibalism, gore, toxic/unreliable narrator, highly canon divergent character portrayal. Read at your own risk. You will probably take psychic damage from this.

╳┆A lure was stuck in the soot between his lungs. Many times he'd felt the tug — enough that the wire fray had worn a rut where his ribs met — and many times he'd found her on the other end, reeling for remnants of him that no longer existed. She would aim to break him open, sift around in the cinders for those specks of him she wanted to confiscate, keep for herself, so that she could finally be rid of him. Once those flecks were washed and panned, the remains would reek like plough mud closure. For that reason he would come to her whole, every whit of ash accounted for.

A cherry little game they'd play. Her with flint and steel, eager to reignite that paltry spark of "good" that flickered freely for a lapse before he remembered himself. Him with tinder and kindling, letting it light only to call on the rain again. Her with just enough hope. Him with just enough time.

That resolve was so very compelling. More than her beauty, her candor, and even that glow he so loved to bask in — that luster he wanted to hold between his teeth and bury under his nails — more than that, her tenacity was a toothsome temptation, and he wasn't keen to deny himself anything.

So when he felt the pull, he caved to the beck and spooled the lisle. That day, the line seemed lighter, thinner, than it ever had. It should've been strong. Tensile. Instead it felt gossamer fine and just as frail, poised to tear at an ill touch, and he wasn’t exactly renowned for his gentle hands. Still, he gathered it with both palms and wrapped it proudly around himself like a ceremonial sash, grin scrawled across his face something devilish.

╳┆He found her lying in the shade beneath a long-lived magnolia, still and silent as she never was, with the color of her namesake spread around her head in halo streaks. Battle-torn, as she so often was, and yet uncannily... passive.

Anything he'd planned to say went out the airlock. Instead, he stood there with an anchor in his stomach, reaping the benefit of doubt.

Not a frown nor a sigh when he darkened her sanctum, only heavenward eyes tearless and unblinking and a resigned breath just short of peaceful. That worn tether waned phantom thin, light as helium, and the tension in his chest went slack.

There was no definite snap. No dramatic severing or ear-popping moment of clarity. Only the vague sense of loss so fresh a wound that denial was a numbing salve.

“Get up,” his voice a command, sandgrit against whetstone, thickened by an unnamed antigen.

The silence felt like mockery. A placid scene void of chittering fauna, clouds' drum, or even the most timid breeze. It wanted him to hear the absence of her breath and the stillness of her chest. It wanted him to hear the hollow. The empty. The nothing. Wanted it to resonate; to find the furthest reaches of his mind and clean them out until all that was left was this icy, clarifying silence.

He knew the end when he saw it. This was something much worse. It was robbery.

Her life wasn’t for the world to take. It was for him to hold in his hands.

Something wet and pathetic slicked his tongue — some whiny, pleading thing — and it was stubborn as oil. The authority slid to the back of his throat and left him choking, “You are the indomitable Titania. You’ve laced fingers with Death time and again only to rise and slay and conquer, so get up.”

Her warmth was set to a slow drip, spilling from her in tired beads and seeping soundlessly into her chosen ground. Little whispers of her lost to greedy loam, sullied, never to be returned.

A waste of precious love. The sod won’t drink of her as he will. It will take of her and give back what? New “life” so fragile and fleeting? A feeble weed will take root, bloom its days few, and curl itself inside out? Pathetic. An insult to her legacy. An insult to the diamond-split sharp of her bladesoul.

His heart boiled over — popping, sticking, simmering sicksweet saccharine. It colored him cloying, flooded his mouth, and forced him to kneel at her altar.

"Please," he keened, hollow and morose, and his own pleading sickened him, “Say something.”

The sun trickled through the leaves like ichor, lighting up her black-blown eyes and the thin ring of honey surrounding them. Dim, distant, and dead as the moon.

His hand carved a path to her face, fingers featherlight against her fading flush. He brushed her bangs from her eyes and forced an unbroken breath through his quavering mouth. He traced each scar too faint to see and the parts of her skin their star kissed. Memorized the map of her face — each curve and crease, each fine hair, and every eyelash. He would carve out a space in his mind in her shape and fill it with the thousand sweet nothings he kept in his pockets.

He gathered her hand and threaded it with his own. When he opened his mouth, a rickety twine escaped from the deepest point of his chest, so he forced his jaws shut to keep the grief corked. He uncurled her fingers and pressed his cheek into her palm, trapping her there against his own scarred skin. His eyes fell shut as he breathed in this borrowed touch — this moment fated, stolen from him by this world's insatiable avarice.

He kissed her palm directly in the center; held it against his mouth and felt his own ruined breath echo back to him from the deepest grooves of her skin. Again, he begged, “Please, Erza.”

Of the armors innumerable now haunting this hallowed ground, this one least befit her.

He revered Death. If there was a god, surely it was Death, he thought, for Death asks for nothing but life. The dead don’t know that they’re dead. They know a split second of euphoria and then a sharp, definite end. Isn’t that the work of a gracious god? One last stroke of color whether in peace or peril, and then eternal rest. Back to the dust you sprouted from.

But now he couldn’t see any of that beauty he often waxed poetic about. All he could see was change yet to come. All he could see was her, and he wanted her back.

He wanted her back, yet he knew better than anyone that there was no such thing as resurrection. While Death might be gracious, it was not generous, and it was not to be reasoned with.

The thought of her buried deep, bathed by the dark and abandoned to rot — it washed his mouth acid sour. It ate straight through his tongue and lingered in the roots of his teeth, burning, raging redhot in his jaws’ marrow. A grave didn't suit her anymore than a pyre.

Soon she would be cold. Stiff. A feast for flies and their insatiable young. In the days to come, she would bubble and bloat and sallow. Her skin would loosen and slough off. The sun would bleach her bones. The meat of her would melt into oil and fat and bogspit. She would mix in with the soil, the groundwater, and this thankless magnolia would thrive.

It was tall, thick, with branches spread in all directions. The lowest of its limbs showed off the varied deep greens of its large waxy leaves, their undersides a chalky brown. A few white flowers bloomed, palm-shaped petals open in praise like they'd come to witness and worship. There was no question why she'd chosen to crawl here. It must've reminded her of home.

Despite its beauty, it was hardly worthy of her. Nothing in this ravenous world was. Her grave should be carved within his chest. There, he could keep her warm. He could host her in his veins. One day, they would wade the waters of woe together. Until then she could live under his skin.

He wouldn’t allow her to spoil. Wouldn’t place her gently into time’s whittlesome hands only to lose her peel by peel by rotting peel.

This world has taken much from you. Do not allow it to take her too.

A carnal ache etched itself into bone, a depth of passion he hadn't felt since he wrought for a false Heaven.

She is a fruit, ripe as a plum and twice the taste. Peel her open. There is a seed at her core. Plant it in your soot-field chest and watch her bloom anew.

What are these hands for if not this?

Flesh like sheets of silk. Muscle like rope. Blood like honey. Bone like an ivory trove. The splitting, the squelching, the straining, ripping, snapping; it burrowed marrow-deep and lingered there. Her chest peeled apart like jagged teeth, jaws croaking their rusted tune, and inside that redslick maw was the center of the universe.

The heart upon its throne, still as she, shielded by her precious lungs. It slid into his palm like it was always meant to be there. Raw, rich, and so very scarlet. Its sinews strained against his pull — those hollow vines that fed even the furthest parts of her — so he wrenched them free and draped himself in them like matchless finery.

Eat. Eat ‘til you’re sick. There’s a hole the size of her in the pit of your stomach. Eat until you fill it.

What are these teeth for if not this?

Tough as leather; smooth as rubber. His teeth slid right off the rind and clicked together with nothing but metallic sheen between them. He gnashed at that ink-dripping muscle until he found a spot weak enough to tear apart. It tasted of rare meat and iron; a heady gore thick enough to drown in. He swallowed, gasped, and that first new breath felt like a blade.

The child inside him saw her split-open ribs as his cradle. He wanted to crawl inside, curl up, and die. He wanted to paint himself her color.

He lost his vision to the hot, angry wash. His own sobs were a distant sound, muffled by meat and blood and his own desperate fingers. He was numb in the mouth and in the shake of his hands, but he forced himself to eat, eat despite the choking, the gagging, the wet, weeping remorse.

Don’t you dare throw her up. Be grateful. Swallow and say thank you and finish what you’ve started.

He bit into his own palm, indistinguishable from her core, and he cried out in sour relief. His hands spread raw grief over his face, through his hair, and down his neck.

You’re no better than this starving world.

He curled into himself, hands clutching his own aching chest, and despite the cloudless sky, he called upon the rain.

#v: ✗ ┆ siegrain ┆ ◜ canon divergent ◞#⚶ ┆ ◜ drabbles ◞#I was in a silly goofy mood #reader beware #this one was an exorcism.#needed to purge this depravity.#hey guys what if I bare my soul and it's a festering wound.#did I provide context? no. am I sorry? also no.#this only works in darkverse.#this is very obviously not inline with canon Jellal's personality but with a mutated version of him I created to balance ->#the healing arc I'm putting him through in mainverse.#not love but a secret other thing (obsession. possession.)(...take my money... I don't need that shit...)#& now she haunts the narrative. in my mind. and his too.#In my defense I've never claimed not to be a degenerate #yeah actually I am kind of embarrassed about this thank you for asking #never thought I’d have to say this but I do not endorse or condone cannibalism.#hey Sieg have you ever thought about chilling. calming down perhaps. I say as if I did not put him in this situation.#I fear this is one of those things I’m going to look back on in a few months & say: that should've stayed in the drafts.#me personally I love posting cringe. it's what I deserve.#if god exists I will have to answer for this. catch me in the river Acheron sipping on straight up anguish.#can you tell I have been confronted by the fleeting nature of mortality more often than usual lately. be honest.#actually I decided to not to go too into depth with the gore this time. I feel like keeping it vague lends more to the fugue state #also because it was giving me REALLY weird dreams. so like. yeah. I could've made this worse. but should I have?#tags bout damn long as the drabble. sorry gang.#cannibalism tw #gore tw #main character death tw #body horror tw #dayne’s depravity #daynedepravity

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andro-dino · 6 months

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Hi sorry for the ask jumpscare. I've been craving some Nile angst recently and may you could provide some of that Nile angst. (bc I randomly remembered the unrequited love Nile/Kyouya clip a while back. But it doesn't have to be about that.)

oooouhhh Nile angst,,, I haven’t had any angst thoughts in a while.

I think Nile’s interesting bc despite what he goes through, he’s actually very levelheaded and calm about it most of the time. I think he’s a very logical person and able to kinda see a lot of situations two steps ahead already, so he’s able to keep cool (for the most part) in the present. I think there’s a lot you could do with that there. I think the most obvious one is the emotional repression angle, where he’s almost too far ahead to the point where he’s not really letting himself feel in the moment. Like, he’s surprisingly chill about Kyoya’s outburst and split off from the group in fury considering how close they are, and he justifies that knowing that that’s just the kind of person Kyoya is and he wouldn’t expect him to stay tied down to something for long, and yet there’s still something about it that makes his stomach turn. He knows Kyoya’s a free spirit and not necessarily the friendliest person, so this isn’t really that out of character for him, yet part of him still wanted Kyoya to consider him a little more. For how close he thought the two were, they weren’t really getting much time together, and now with this, it only made him feel less secure about their bond. It’s kind of a feeling of his rationalism clashing with his own feelings and attachments, yk?

Another route I actually remembered I have thought a bit about before is how much Nile worries over Kyoya. Nile cares for Kyoya a ton, more than Kyoya probably even realizes, but he also knows that Kyoya has NO sense of self preservation and just wishes he would stop being so goddamn stubborn and reckless all the time. This thought is kinda inspired by wild fang vs gan gan galaxy, where Kyoya is super beat up and in no shape to battle after his battle with Gingka, yet still insists on going out there, despite Nile’s protests. Again, Nile kinda just accepts this as part of Kyoya’s character, but it worries him so much. I can definitely see and argument breaking out about that, and I think it could be interesting if Nile argued in this case that it’s selfish of Kyoya to be so reckless because of how much it disregards everyone else around him. It’s selfish because every time he does it, Nile is worried sick about what might happen to him, and he doesn’t even take the time to think about how his actions are causing that and considering anyone’s feelings besides his own. Like, not to pull out the “Why can’t you take care of yourself, if not for yourself then for me?” right now but like basically that. I’ve thought about this idea more lightheartedly before (I have an old ass doodle somewhere of Nile bandaging Kyoya up while the two yell at each other, ala “THIS IS STUPID IM FINE CHRIST THAT HURTS” “WELL MAYBE IF YOU WERENT GOING AROUND OVEREXERTING YOURSELF AND THROWING YOURSELF INTO TORNADOES, NEITHER OF US WOULD BE IN THIS SITUATION”) but I think it’s a very easy concept to make more angsty if you add more heartache into it.

Nile in general strikes me as the kind of independent but lonely type. In my head at least, he has a kind of duality between being fine on his own, and even preferring it at most points, but so desperately craving human connection and care. I think that’s part of what lets he and Kyoya get along so well in the first place, both are very free spirited and independent, but are able to understand each other and mesh more comfortably because of that. And with that, since there is a degree of yearning and relishing in that connection once he gets it, it’s only all the more confusing and painful once it’s called into question. Him kinda being under the impression that their relationship was something they both enjoyed more than being complete loners most of the time, yet he’s so willing to separate and say he doesn’t need anyone at all. Nile kinda figured they both needed each other a bit, so it’s strange realizing that may have been more one sided than he initially realized.

#axel’s silly little thoughts #nile beyblade #my ask box is always open I love being insane about fictional characters 🫶#always looking for more excuses to talk excessively about things im insane about #Nile’s a character who I think is very easy to make angsty but I always worry it’s gonna be ooc for him since he is so chill in canon #it’s fun to think abt that though #I think you could also for the very easy route of Nile realizing Kyoya’s entire being revolving around Gingka and being like #’hey what the fuck’#but I’m not really a big kyogin guy so I don’t really like to think about it much lolz <3

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