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a-bucket-full-of-feels · 23 hours

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Thoughts after watching BanG Dream! It's MyGO!!!!! as a former Bandori fan

I used to be a rather active Bandori fan back in the day, actively playing Girls' Band Party (Garupa), listening to their original music and covers, and I even watched all 3 seasons of the anime. However, I eventually stopped playing the game, because I no longer felt compelled to keep up with the events, and following that I eventually lost interest in the music they've put out, both old and new. That was shortly after Morfonica was added to the game, so when MyGO!!!! was announced, I was already quite far removed from the fandom, though I did see promotional materials and briefly thought it was an interesting band concept at first. The reason I decided to give the MyGO anime a shot was because I had seen discussions mostly on Reddit on how good the anime was, and also how MyGO interestingly became extremely popular in China, which is fascinating because usually newer bands or members would never reach the same level of popularity as the OGs (take the Love Live franchise and AKB group for example). And after watching the anime, I could totally understand why it's so highly raved about.

Having read several band and event stories in Garupa (I played on the JP server so the only way to understand the stories was to rely on dedicated fan translations), I have seen how the Bandori writing team is able to craft great character development arcs and drama through the in-game stories, and these band and event stories are integral parts to each character's development, since a 13-episode anime can't possibly do justice to their massive cast. In contrast, the anime plots I have always found to be mediocre at best, mostly focusing on light drama and finding ways to showcase performances (though I remember the season with RAS as one of the main bands did flesh out the drama in RAS' backstory pretty well). In a sense, the anime was more of a companion piece to the game stories. So when I watched the MyGO anime, I was surprised at how well written the anime was, sufficient to be a standalone piece, and how gritty and realistic the drama was.

The first 2 episodes kind of started off slow at first, setting up the premise for the formation of the band - the breakup of a previous band which wasn't a completely original idea, given that Saaya also had a similar backstory in the Popipa anime. But what made this plot point shine in MyGO is how tangible it made the trauma of CRYCHIC's breakup feel through the lens of different characters. Episode 3 was an excellent demonstration of this storytelling through the lens of Tomori, from how she used to be an awkward kid who was detached from her emotions, till Sakiko brought the band together which gave her something to love, and then abruptly taking it away from her by disbanding CRYCHIC. Likewise, we're given equal opportunities to step into the emotional turmoil of the different characters, like how Taki struggles with her inferiority complex when she faces the task of composing music for the band (which Sakiko used to handle); or how Anon struggles with running away from challenges that are too daunting for her; or how Raana has been drifting around, unable to find a band or place she wants to stay put in; and then there's Soyo.

Holy shit, I know I'm not the first person to recognise it but Soyo's arc really was something else and I really loved how they executed it. She seemed to be a nice, friendly girl at first (as compared to Taki's brash attitude to the "outsider" Anon, owing to her over-protectiveness towards Tomori), but here and there little hints are dropped, like how she repeatedly approaches Mutsumi about joining the new band and contacting Sakiko, to the scenes where she constantly looks at her old CRYCHIC photos. And then she snaps at the end of episode 7 and we find out her true intentions - she wants to re-form CRYCHIC all over again and is willing to abandon the "new" members Anon and Raana so that the original members will be together again. Beneath that well-mannered mask of hers is a possessive, manipulative girl, and also a desperate and lonely girl who cannot let go of her memories of CRYCHIC - that scene when she literally goes onto her knees to beg Sakiko felt so raw, I was impressed that Bandori was willing to write such a morally complex character for their series, I literally thought she was just the rich girl version of Imai Lisa at first. And what's interesting is at the end, Soyo doesn't completely "get over" this - she still holds on to the trauma and memories from CRYCHIC'S breakup, but still moves on with her activities in MyGO.

And speaking of morally questionable girls, I also want to talk about arguably the antagonist of the series, the one who caused all the trauma, Sakiko. In the final episode, we're given a plausible explanation to why Sakiko abruptly quit the band and joined Haneoka High instead of staying in rich girl's Tsukinomori - due to her family's sudden financial downturn and her father turning to alocholism to cope (that would explain the latter, but it may not be the only reason for the former). And similar to Soyo's arc, there were also little hints dropped like how in the present day she is always seen outside her former home rather than indoors, and how she only plays Haneoka's music room piano instead of her own, and Nyamu's comment about coming to an expensive place which could be beyond her budget. Though, it seems like the full development of Sakiko's story would occur in the Ave Mujica anime, but nonetheless, I really appreciated this touch of realism in Sakiko's character - because in "idol" series and Bandori included, most of the time the character drama is developed around less heavy topics, like maybe their lack of confidence or failing at something once and not wanting to try it again for fear of failure. It seems like the Ave Mujica anime will be even grittier so I'm quite interested in how it will play out.

In terms of things I think could have been improved, definitely one thing is that they could have developed Raana's story a bit more. Given that she's the granddaughter of the old lady who ran SPACE in S1 before it closed, it would've been interesting to learn about her relationship with her grandmother and why she clings on so dearly to her old guitar, and why she spent all this time wandering around by herself without forming a band despite her technical prowess. Though she does serve her purpose to lighten the mood in an otherwise heavy show, so perhaps her character will shine more in the Garupa stories.

Overall, I really enjoyed It's MyGO!!!! and can see why it fared excellently as a standalone anime, while also working as a piece part of the larger Bandori universe (especially with all the cameos and references). Will I play Garupa again just for them? No, it's too much time commitment to restart Garupa at this point. But will I listen to their music? Hell yeah I will - I really like their style of music, which to me is reminiscent of artists/bands like Atarayo and Minami, so I'll definitely follow the music they release. (IMO, they're the aesthetic I was hoping Afterglow was supposed to have but somehow I never really got into their original songs that much...)

#show reviews #lots of spoilers btw

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apocalypticavolition · 10 months

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Let's (re)Read The Eye of the World! Chapter 26: Whitebridge

All right people who haven't read the entire Wheel of Time series, it's time for you to make a choice. You can escape downriver in a nice boat and stay away from all the nasty spoilers, or you can cross this bridge and get hit upside the head with whatever bullshit I randomly throw in here. It could be from any point in the series, so if you're avoiding that kind of nonsense, make your aquatic escape now.

This chapter has Thom's harp yet again. As before, it's about the influence he'll have on the boys. This chapter it also refers to his supposed sacrifice to save them. Regardless, just like last time, he's the only thing keeping them alive.

“I suppose I should thank you,” Thom Merrilin muttered finally, “for teaching me how true the old saying is. Teach him how you will, a pig will never play the flute.” The sailor burst out laughing, and Mat raised the flute as if to throw it at him.

Of course, just because he's the thin barricade between them and death doesn't mean he likes them or that they're remotely grateful. Even Rand doesn't really want to learn, he's just doing this for their cover story, though he will have more of an appreciation for these skills as the story goes on.

Mat looked up, still frowning. “What if they are dead?” he said softly. “We have to accept facts, right?”

There's a sad parallel in Perrin awkwardly trying to assure Egwene that the others aren't dead and Mat here trying to pull Rand into the doubt and despair that the dagger generates.

So it will all turn out like one of Thom’s stories? The heroes find the treasure and defeat the villain and live happily ever after? Some of his stories don’t end that way. Sometimes even heroes die. Are you a hero, Rand al’Thor? Are you a hero, sheepherder?

All of this does end up happening. Y'all find the various plot coupons and get rich in the process, the Dark One is sealed away, and despite the looming Seanchan Outriggers it does seem like when that drama is over you all will retire happily, except Egwene who dies.

The White Bridge arched high over the wide waters, twice as high as the Spray’s mast and more, and from end to end it gleamed milky white in the sunlight, gathering the light until it seemed to glow. Spidery piers of the same stuff plunged into the strong currents, appearing too frail to support the weight and width of the bridge. It looked all of one piece, as if it had been carved from a single stone or molded by a giant’s hand, broad and tall, leaping the river with an airy grace that almost made the eye forget its size.

Thom thinks that the bridge is from the Age of Legends, but I personally think it's marginally newer; one of the first major structures assembled in the immediate aftermath. It seems very unlikely to me that two major rivers would have survived the totality of the Breaking intact, and we already know that the Erinin's northern half didn't change significantly after Lews's suicide. Thus, the odds of this river not having moved seem significantly lower - especially since the Two Rivers were recently part of an ocean! The White Bridge, to me, represents the last gasp of a dying art, an Aes Sedai work possible to perform without mixed-gender circles but too difficult to keep up all the same.

“We made it, Thom,” he said, then forced a laugh. “And no mutiny.”

I wouldn't say that until I was off the ship myself, but what do I know?

“You’ve slept on watch for the last time on my vessel! Or on any vessel, if I have my way of it. Choose your own side—the dock or the river—but off my vessel now!”

I wonder if Domon and Egeanin will ever discuss how one of the things they have in common is a complete disdain for Gelb.

“Aye, well, as to that. . . .” The captain produced a leather purse from his coat pocket and tossed it to Thom. It clinked when Thom caught it. “Your fares back, and a bit more besides. The damage was no so bad as I thought, and you’ve worked your way and more with your tales and your harp.

So that's Rand's ta'veren, I expect. Or Mat's, since it's kind of lucky. Like Domon's a good guy and all, and this is definitely the kind of thing he'd at least consider for other gleemen, but not go so far as to return their fares and extra. Definitely offer it to sweeten the pot to stay, but not just toss it upfront.

So much for not being noticed, Rand thought, dismayed. By sundown it would be all over Whitebridge that there was a gleeman in town.

I'm a wee bit surprised that gleemen are big deals in Whitebridge, but I guess that for quite a lot of people it's the effective end of the road. And with the winter not ending properly, he's probably the first one of the season. Just another little way all the details of the world add up to ensure that Rand is constantly fucked at any given moment.

“An innkeeper will be able to tell us if they’re here, or if they’ve passed through. The right innkeeper. Innkeepers have all the news and gossip. If they aren’t here. . . .”He looked back and forth from Rand to Mat. “We have to talk, we three.”

It's like Thom wants to be forced to fake his death at an inopportune time! Be more genre savvy, gleeman!

Rand wondered idly if all innkeepers were fat and losing their hair.

Only the good ones. I'll have to go into the hospitality business if I ever start losing my hair.

“Straight on from the bridge,” Thom said, “is the road to Caemlyn. Anyone passing through Whitebridge comes through this square, unless they’re going by river, and we know your friends aren’t doing that. If there is no word of them here, it doesn’t exist. Let me do the talking. This has to be done carefully.”

More good mentor points for Thom for continuing to explain why he does what he does so that the boys can learn.

Aes Sedai had been involved in taking Logain, of course. Bartim spat on the floor when he said that, and again when he said they were taking the false Dragon north to Tar Valon. Bartim was a decent man, he said, a respectable man, and Aes Sedai could all go back to the Blight where they came from and take Tar Valon with them, as far as he was concerned.

It's incredible how even the Red Ajah, whose purpose should be the most popular thing on the planet, manage to have PR this terrible. "Yeah they saved humanity from a madman who was going to plunge our society into a war the scale of which hasn't been seen for a thousand years, but fuck those witches amirite? Hope they all die miserably."

“They’ll be taking him there to show to Queen Morgase.” The innkeeper touched his forehead respectfully. “I’ve never seen the Queen. Man ought to see his own Queen, don’t you think?”

Queen oughta tour her queendom on occasion! (Funny foreshadowing though.)

“Why, the hunt for the Horn, of course,” Bartim exclaimed. “Didn’t I say that? The Illianers are calling on everybody as will swear their lives to the hunt to gather in Illian. Can you imagine that? Swearing your life to a legend? I suppose they’ll find some fools. There’s always fools around. This fellow claimed the end of the world is coming. The last battle with the Dark One.”

It's a rare thing when a guy proclaiming the end of the world is right, but that dude was. The Hunt is another thing that seemed to fall to the wayside; we meet many people that joined this hunt, but Illian's association with the Horn is never important. The Horn itself obviously matters though.

Thom still seemed to be a thousand miles away, so Rand said, “We’re looking for some friends who were coming this way. From the west. Have there been many strangers passing through in the last week or two?”

Rand loses points for being a bad student and ignoring instructions. This directly sets off the sequence of events that leads to Thom having to ditch them, so it's a triple penalty.

About a week ago, as near as I can say, a weaselly fellow came over the bridge. Crazy, everybody thought. Always talking to himself, never stopped moving even when he was standing still. Asked about the same people . . . some of them.

Hi, Padan Fain! Shame you don't think about him, Rand.

“He was crazy, but the other one. . . .” Bartim’s eyes shifted uneasily, and his tongue ran over his lips as if he could not find enough spit to moisten them. “Next day . . . next day the other one came for the first time.” He fell silent.

And this foreshadows that Fain's got off the Darkfriend script. If he was still working for Ba'alzamon, they wouldn't have sent a Fade afterward - and frankly, he would have been kept sane enough to ask discretely and in a way that wouldn't stand out. Luckily for everyone in Whitebridge, I don't think Fain was radioactive evil yet, so hopefully no one got any bad doses of Shadar Logoth.

“I think I’d remember if I ever met anyone like that,” Thom said after a minute.

"I hate Aes Sedai," says man who knows how to dissemble better than most Aes Sedai.

“And he’ll be back,” Thom said, leaning across the table and lowering his voice. “I say we sneak back to the boat and take Captain Domon up on his offer. The hunt will center on the road to Caemlyn while we’re on our way to Illian, a thousand miles from where the Myrddraal expect us.”

Really, the thing that makes the Hunt's fading into obscurity and Illian's connection being so irrelevant so surprising to me is the sheer number of people who try to convince Rand to go there early: Bayle, Thom, Moiraine. Maybe Lanfear? It feels like it should be a way bigger deal than it ends up being.

Thom seemed to understand. The gleeman’s face softened. “Even those dreams, lad. They are still just dreams, aren’t they? For the Light’s sake, Mat, talk to him. I know you don’t want to go to Tar Valon, at least.”

Another good Thom quality is how he understands Rand's emotions better and validates them. Way too many of his mentors don't understand him at all, or do understand what he's feeling and antagonize him for it.

Domon isn’t sailing until tomorrow morning. At best he’ll have Trollocs chasing him all the way to Illian. Well, he’s half expecting it for some reason, but that won’t do us any good.

Shame they didn't think to pull at that thread a little more. It's good set-up for the next book though.

Mat shrugged. He eyed each of them, then shrugged again. “I’m just on edge. I can’t seem to get rid of it. Every time we stop for a breath, they’re there, hunting us. I feel like somebody’s staring at the back of my head all the time. What are we going to do?”

I wonder if somebody who was just an idiot treasure hunter without numerous enemies would have taken a little longer to fall under the dagger's spell. Or if Shadar Logoth only tried to pull on Mat in the first place because he was already feeling that paranoia when they entered the city.

“My brother’s only son, my only living kin. He got in trouble with the Aes Sedai, but I was too busy with . . . other things. I don’t know what I could have done, but when I finally tried, it was too late. Owyn died a few years later. You could say Aes Sedai killed him.”

What could you have done Thom, except either kill him yourself or enable him to kill everyone he loved? Dude lasted three years without getting gentled; it was really only a matter of time. Oh well, at least Thom's hatred of the Aes Sedai has more justification than the vast majority of the setting's.

“We’ll walk out of here one at a time, just close enough to keep each other in sight. Shouldn’t be remembered especially, that way. Can’t you slouch?” he added to Rand. “That height of yours is as bad as a banner.”

So in this chapter, our heroes have discussed:

The Horn of Valere

Bayle Domon's mysterious motivations AKA one of the seven seals

Ways Rand stand out, like banners

Guess what three things they find in the Eye of the World!

The Fade was just as startled. Its leisurely pace faltered in mid-stride. Its hand swept toward the hilt of the black sword hanging at its waist, but the gleeman’s long legs covered the distance quickly. Thom crashed into the Myrddraal before the black blade was half drawn, and both went down in a thrashing heap. The few people still in the square fled. “RUN!” The air in the square flashed an eye-searing blue, and Thom began to scream, but even in the middle of the scream he managed a word. “RUN!” Rand obeyed. The gleeman’s screams pursued him.

Thom's such a badass. Goodbye for this book, Thom. It's rare when I'm glad that there's a fake-out death, but I'm glad here. For now. When we get to the mustache pulling I reserve the right to change my mind. Anyway though, Thom is too good a mentor for Rand which is why the narrative works double and triple time to ensure that he never gets a chance to benefit from the man's full attention. Dude would have found a way to off Cadsuane mid-slapping Rand in the face, which would have made Rand laugh and saved the world six books early, saving us the readers from quite a lot of misery along the way.

“You think Egwene and Moiraine and the rest are dead, too. If they’re dead, why are the Myrddraal still hunting them? Answer me that?” Mat dropped to his knees in the dust beside him. “All right. Maybe they are alive. But Thom—You saw! Blood and ashes, Rand, the same thing can happen to us.”

Rand and Mat are very lucky to have confirmation of their friends' survival, really. The hope will certainly help Rand keep going as things rapidly go to shit on the road. And Mat clearly learned nothing from Thom since he's not genre savvy enough to understand that if you don't see a body, they're probably still alive.

And that's another chapter! Next time, we're back with Perrin and Egwene. Sadly, Perrin will neither learn from his mentor nor will Elyas be dramatically faking his death.

#let's read #wheel of time #wot #robert jordan #wheel of time spoilers #wot spoilers #rand al'thor #mat cauthon #thom merrilin

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galacticnova3 · 1 year

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No. No. Stop that. Dont say things like that. You cant just drop that information all nonchalantly

Gonna assume this is about the Lor museum phobia thing but like. In my defense I grew up with things like The Brave Little Toaster and Robots(2005) and my brain is wired to make connections like that as a result. And like, think about it.

There are many museum ships that aren’t exactly what they were in their time, sitting on a spectrum between original and replica. Aging metal from less advanced times corrodes, exterior paint needs touch-ups, etc. Over time a lot of the more fragile materials and internal things prone to degradation may be replaced with similar things that will last, since the goal is to preserve aesthetics more than functionality, meaning the latter can be sacrificed for the former. At the very least, replicas using the same material will be used in favor of something falling apart. Does that not align with the goals of taxidermy? To display a creature in a way that is as similar to the living thing as possible, just changing the insides for the sake of maintaining outer aesthetics? Few museum ships are still seaworthy, kept around solely for observation and out of public attachment rather than to perform a service, just as taxidermy animals are maintained so we know what they looked like in the past even though the individual is long dead.

We know Lor is old. Like, really really REALLY old. She, or rather her model, was also a very important and recognizable piece of technology to the point that knowledge of her existence persisted into the present day. It was implied there are multiple Lors out there in an official Miiverse post, which leaves the potential for other Starcutters in general but regardless means she definitely isn’t the only space boat of her kind with her exact appearance to exist. This means that, between her historical importance and memorability, she’s exactly the sort of individual that would be found in a theoretical museum of the Ancients. In fact there is very much the possibility that another Starcutter of her model could have ended up with that fate, outmoded by those with newer technology and more efficient builds, too inefficient to justify keeping in service, but holding too much value to simply be scrapped and have their materials repurposed for newer projects.

Imagine waking up long after you were supposed to be gone, thousands of years having passed since your last conscious moment. Though you know you must be the last of your kind, or at least the last member of a specific group within your kind, there is little to remind you of that in day to day life. The reality is rarely at the forefront of your mind; your focus is on the present, the time you came from long having fell from relevance even for you. The others are all gone, you will never see them again, that is a simple fact of your existence that is easy to accept when there are no faces attached. And then, one day, you learn you are not the only one still around! The others, or maybe just one other perhaps, they lasted with you in a sense. They just aren’t alive like you are; they’re on display to be gawked at by the masses, a little card listing fun facts and other information beneath them, things all too familiar to you. You know they aren’t all there; they would have been decommissioned long ago, gutted of everything that would not be shown or needed, the less stable bits taken out for safety and to maintain appearances. In just about every sense it’s like looking in a mirror only to see your own corpse, propped up and posed to look alive and well, forever denied the freedom and dignity to rest and rot.

Would you not be deeply unsettled in that situation? Would the realization that it could have been you in that exhibit not be frightening?

#asks #rambling #my headcanons #yes I am very normal about this kind of thing

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white-cat-of-doom · 1 year

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The White Cat Sees CATS (Again!) in Hamilton (04 December 2022)

Let me start off by saying that this was meant to be written back in December, and I apologize to anyone who was left burning waiting for my unimportant thoughts. At the beginning of December, I was hoping to attend more shows around Ontario, but I decided against it for the shows during the week (in London), and the Saturday show in Kingston was unfortunately cancelled, cutting the six show mini-tour down to four shows, and meaning that I will likely only see this cast once unfortunately.

The show was luckily at one of my favourite theatres and not terribly far from where I live, which was nice. I also had a great seat close to the stage to see all of my Kitties, being in the middle of the second row from the stage.

As I said last year, the performers in US Tour 6 (and in other CATS productions worldwide) are living my dream right now, as I wish I could be onstage night after night in a show that means everything to me, and to which I owe such a great deal personally. Everyday I get closer in my head to being onstage, you guys watch out ;).

This should be a relatively short collection of my thoughts on US Tour 6 compared to the in-depth one I wrote for the three shows I saw in Ottawa 14-16 March 2022. If want to know what I think about the general US Revival show format in addition to the cast performances, you will find it there, taking away much of the negativity in the review below.

Megan Arseneau was the only cover of the night, on for Jennyanydots instead of Michelle E. Carter, with all the other performers being the principal cast since the tour started once more for the year last September in 2022.

If you want a very short review, I thought that this cast was absolutely amazing! They are a phenomenal group and I enjoyed them more as a whole (and generally individually) than the cast last year. Many performers gave me more of what I was looking for in terms of characteristics for a large portion of the Cats, which I loved! Like the cast for the last tour cycle, I would not hesitate to see them again, and I am a bit sad that I will not.

A longer piece with my thoughts is found below. This likely does not include all of my original thoughts on the show I saw because we are months after now and I have forgotten some finer details!

I will try to keep this review as subjective as possible, which means minimal comparisons to the cast last year for characters, unless they are a returning performer. As stated in my last review, please note that my opinions or preferences are personal, everyone is allowed to think what they like, and anyone is free to disagree with me or point out where they think I am being too critical. I always welcome the feedback, as I love hearing about what others think about the show! I do have specific viewpoints on how I like performances of CATS to be presented, and I tend to be very specific when it comes to how I want any performer to sound when they sing or how they conduct themselves for a given character. This is where my personal opinions and criticisms are focused, and your views can be completely different.

For those reading this, I appreciate it! This is nothing more than my thoughts on seeing the production of CATS that fortunately toured close to where I live, and which I am also fortunate enough to see!

Being back in the Junkyard after 263 days since the final date in Ottawa, it once again almost did not feel real that the show happened in front of me, which seems silly to say. It is such a magical feeling to become immersed in the show, and one that I would not trade for much else in the world!

The Overture was great to see once more live, returning me again to the special night of The Jellicle Ball. With the pageantry and final push, it kicked off to Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Songs with a newer cast for me. Watching Nora DeGreen emerge from the pipe, they had an intense look of fear and paranoia which was interesting. They definitely played up the fear that Demeter experiences in a way that I enjoyed and I thought fit well with the character, and I will touch on that later. Everyone was in top form during the opening prologue, and a few fantastic performers were back! Lexy Bittner, the enigmatic and unique Cassandra of the US Tour, is still a force to be reckoned with throughout the show! She was one of my favourite performers with the last cast and I was happy to see her return. Lexy still sings her lines with a slight manic delivery and it is immense fun! The rest of the dressed company were great as well. Few things make me happier than seeing Jellylorum, played here by Allyson Duarte, come out for the first time to sing her lines. It is pure, unrestrained joy to see my favourite character! Kade Wright, who plays Munkustrap, added a bit of flair to his role in the opening, and I love to see performers whose dreams involve being in CATS! I was also incredibly excited to see Erica Lee Cianciulli as Bombalurina, an alumni of CATS from previous Casts (10 and briefly 11) of the Oasis of the Seas! Erica was one of my favourite Bombalurina performers before she was cast in this tour, and she is amazing onstage and I felt lucky to see her! One thing that was apparent to me, even before seeing the show, is that the makeup for everyone is being done very well! I am not going to speculate why or how, but it is very nice to see an improvement over the previous tour cycle. With a point of the finger and an important question posed, What Is A Jellicle Cat, Oh Man Over There?, the energy for the rest of the show was set high!

The Naming of Cats was done wonderfully, with the great effect of select Cats' faces, mainly Coricopat and Tantomile, being highlighted with the stage lights. John Anker Bow, probably my favourite live performer of the former cast, still was having his fun sliding down stage to stare at his audience as Asparagus/'Peter'. It is always so much fun to be investigated by the clowder onstage!

The first moment that I had been waiting (and hoping) for since I purchased the tickets for the show was next, and it was time for the White Cat Solo, one of my absolute favourite parts of the show! A bit of a sidetrack, when they first announced just the names of the cast before their respective roles (I still think that was a bit funny it took them almost a day to update the website!), I was crossing my fingers that Yuka Notsuka would be Victoria, and she very excitedly was! I had been looking forward to seeing her onstage for those prior months leading up to this show, and she was everything that I wanted in a Victoria! I absolutely adore when Victoria is always beaming and happy, and I do not think Yuka stopped smiling for basically the entire show! She was so precious! I saw her joy and passion through her dancing and she is an incredible performer! Her White Cat Solo was great and I am so happy that I got the chance to see her onstage! I am also happy that Yuka continues the representation of having an Asian woman play Victoria. I hope that she inspires many young performers like Hyla Mayrose Perillo did last year! Beautiful job Yuka!

Getting into The Invitation to The Jellicle Ball, Ibn Snell presents himself as a confident and more mature Mistoffelees, which I enjoyed. He is not too showy or pompous, and that fits better in my mind than the center of attention style some performers have with the character. Ibn is a fantastic dancer, definitely one of the best in the entire company, and it was a joy to see him throughout the show.

Another song that I always look forward to is The Old Gumbie Cat! I will be honest in saying that I was *really* looking forward to seeing Michelle E. Carter as Jennyanydots, one of my favourite performers from last year who I was happy to see return, and I was more than a bit bummed to have Megan Arseaneu cover instead going into the show. I was still very excited regardless, as the song is one of my favourites! The Gumbie Trio of Erica as Bombalurina, Nora as Demeter, and Allyson as Jellylorum harmonized beautifully and I loved seeing them sing about the Gumbie Cat alongside Munkustrap. Megan did an excellent job covering Jennyanydots, and the role was in great hands! Out of the eight roles Megan covers as a Swing, Jennyanydots is probably the one I wanted to see her as the most, so I had that chance. She was not quite as animated as I would have hoped, but she got the job done more than effectively. Megan's tap solo was on point and everyone had fun joining in as the song progressed, but I cannot help but wish I saw Michelle instead, who I just love! Michelle is the epitome of Jennyanydots and I missed seeing her. I think I would have enjoyed the song more with Michelle, as it did not leave as much of an impression on me as I wanted it to, being one of my favourites in the show. Having one of your favourite characters performed by someone outside of one of your favourite cast members is hard to live up to! Saying that, Megan is supremely talented and it was great to have a chance to see her perform onstage, showing off her technicality and talent as a super Swing! The Gumbie Tap and Coat are some of my favourite costumes to see, so I can never be too disappointed by who is wearing them!

The Rum Tum Tugger was up next and Hank Santos as the titular character knows how to control an audience! With an abundance of (chaotic) energy and plentiful charisma, he comes on stage ready to go and does not let off the gas for the entirety of the scene. Incorporating a bit of menace, Hank annoyed Munkustrap without becoming (too much of) a pest and riled up the other Toms as well. Hank did a perfect job at balancing the Rockstar attitude with the general anarchy of the Curious Cat, without delving into becoming overly annoying or juvenile, and it made for some great entertainment. The Queens loved him as usual, and Erica as Bombalurina was quite forceful in trying to have Tugger all to herself, sensual in her pursuit. The whole number was capped off by some proper over exaggerations from Hank to have his own spotlight, and a fun Jellylorum belt to close everything before the playout. Good stuff all around!

Our first view of Grizabella, played by Tayler Harris, comes next with Grizabella, the Glamour Cat. The first thing I noticed about Tayler's performance was that she was playing Grizabella as much more angry and bitter than the shows I saw her in the previous tour cycle. Her tone and delivery were quite pointed and I enjoyed the added emotion behind it. One of my main criticisms last year with Tayler was that she seemed to be going through the motions too much to my liking and I wanted more depth in her performance. I thought that she did better this night, and I liked the anger and remorse! I want Grizabella to hold resentment for her past family that has not welcomed her back (yet). Nora as Demeter seemed very hesitant and stressed to see Grizabella initially, but still stuck around to serenade the Glamour Cat. I thought Nora did a great job with the attitude that I wanted to see from Demeter during this song, and with Erica as Bombalurina joining in, her attitude reflecting the anger of Grizabella, it added to everything. Very good!

Bustopher Jones was, and always is, a fun time! Everyone is happy to see The Cat About Town, and John Anker Bow is incapable of having a bad performance in my mind. Although the US Revival version of the scene is still not favourite, everyone did a perfect job. There was not as much interaction with Bustopher and Jennyanydots or Jellylorum, something that I enjoyed last time. I think the more small, silly interactions here add to the song, as it a light-hearted scene. The Kittens at the end of the song sang clearly (and loudy!) and I enjoyed that. I will say once again that I missed Michelle as Jennyanydots, as I really enjoyed her vocal delivery, mannerisms, and character interactions onstage here. Megan still did a great job, however!

The first Macavity scare leads into Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, another fun song. Former (and current to be honest, considering he still covers six tracks) super Swing Brian Craig Nelson is the principal Mungojerrie and he brings some passion to his onstage performance which I noticed. Taryn Smithson as Rumpleteazer, the other half of the Notorious (and Horrible) Cats, is *very* excitable, and it is on full display here. I do have a preference for both characters to be darker characteristically in portrayal, especially Rumpleteazer who I consider the smarter one, and I did not really get that. Although I loved seeing how happy Taryn was, she seemed too innocent to be a seasoned cat burglar. These two Cats are just early in their lives of crime and will harden with age! The performance of the song was still great, and I finally got to see the trademark double cartwheel live! Great fun, as the shows in Ottawa did not have it due to performer injury.

With the arrival of someone important on the horizon, it is time for another performer that I have been looking forward to seeing live, Cameron Schutza as Old Deuteronomy! The chorus of Cats to welcome the Jellicle Leader was pleasant, and Kade as Munkustrap and Hank as Rum Tum Tugger were great together, with Hank playing up some of the lines a bit for comedic effect. No one was more excited to see Old Deuteronomy than Yuka as Victoria, smiling brightly at the wings of the stage for him to come out! Cameron's tenor voice as Old Deuteronomy was quite powerful (even moreso than I was expecting, but he *is* a classically trained opera singer after all!) and he definitely has the voice behind the character. Just fantastic!

The second (still in my mind unnecessary) Macavity scare led into The Jellicle Ball, one of my favourites in the show. Everyone did a fantastic job singing during the first half with The Song of The Jellicles. Of course, the main event is The Jellicle Ball itself, and it is an honour to see the movement of some of the best dancers anywhere in performing arts! The US Revival choreography will never be my favourite, but with everyone in perfect form, it is still an amazing spectacle! Catching glimpses of the excitement and joy on each of the performers' faces is a rewarding experience, and once again, Yuka as Victoria was an absolute beacon of happiness! Her pas de deux with Samuel Buchanan as Plato is a tender moment for Platoria fans everywhere (like me), even if it is still a bit overdone with the choreographic changes in my opinion. The lead up to that moment gives Yuka time to shine once more as Victoria, her movements performed with a wonderful fluidity and passion to them, and I absolutely loved it! The entire cast carried the high set energy from the opening number throughout the first Act, and now it was time for them to have a much needed rest with Grizabella interrupting the celebration again.

Tayler still carried her resentment from earlier in the Act while watching everyone leave the stage, eventually dropping it in favour of the sadness and longing to be back in the Tribe after trying (and ultimately failing) to capture the spirit of The Jellicle Moon in her dancing. I again enjoyed the increased emotion in Tayler's performance for Act I Memory, as the final notes rang out to end Act I as she left the stage.

Everyone comes back fairly orderly for The Moments of Happiness, and Cameron as Old Deuteronomy again has his chance to demonstrate his powerful voice. There is a wonderful clarity and emotion behind his singing that is a joy to experience in person, and it gives off an authority as The Jellicle Leader. Sam Bello as Sillabub gave a fantastic performance of the Moonlight portion of the song, and she had such a rich voice that I really enjoyed. She gave me the feeling of seeing a Cat with former lives behind her that she expresses in her current one, giving a voice with the added maturity to it. I would love to see Sam in a more vocal heavy role, and I think she would be great at them!

It was now time for my favourite song of the entire show, Gus, the Theatre Cat! I had been waiting for months to see and hear Allyson as Jellylorum and she did an excellent job. She was so cheery, which I think is essential for all Jellylorum performers (it is right in her three words!), and did her best to hype up Gus. Her voice was very sweet and beautiful, but lacked a certain maturity that I prefer for the character, but regardless was one of my favourites of the cast (and any cast). Allyson was not acting so much as strictly a caretaker of Gus, as many other Jellylorum performers tend to do, but rather more a devoted fan of The Theatre Cat, still being gentle with the older Tom. You could see Jellylorum's passion for Gus' performance history, but not as much for the Cat himself, as if she was still early in the phase of taking care of him and is still fairly young. I would have liked to see a bit more of a connection between them, given my familiar views of the two characters, but the level of passion for Gus from Jellylorum was really nice to see. John was fantastic as Gus, just like the three nights I had seen him perform in Ottawa, with that voice that is guaranteed to soften the hardest of hearts. He always puts in the right amount of drama and silliness to make the character very dynamic, and John remains one of my favourite performers in any current cast.

The Pekes and The Pollicles was a fun scene afterwards, with John reliving Gus' glory days as The Rumpus Cat. The entire company has fun here, with a chance to be a bit less serious, even more so when mostly everyone is in costume. Kade again provided a bit more Munkustrap drama, here mirroring Gus, and it was great to see.

Skimbleshanks the Railway Cat was next, a highlight to see when the train is assembled. John Zamborsky is a fun Skimbleshanks and seems happy to sing about their endeavors in keeping The Midnight Mail running smoothly (even if they are a bit late due to a cat nap!). John's Skimbleshanks is excitable and brings a high level of energy to the song, but is too young in my preference (as with all the recent US Revival castings). Their voice is somewhat immature for the role, but I view it more that Skimbleshanks is still in the heydays of their train career, instead of coming towards retirement. Continuing on from the more loose song prior, the Cats play around listening to rail life, and are all excited to build the train! I could once again see Yuka as Victoria onstage absolutely beaming, helping to keep the train rolling down the tracks before the inevitable deconstruction. Everything is put away and the Cats finish up their field trip with Skimbleshanks at the helm.

One last interrupting crash, and Macavity is finally here, stealing away Old Deuteronomy. I had been looking to seeing Nora and Erica together in action for a while, interested to see their dynamic live. Throughout the show so far, each time there was a Macavity scare, I could see the fear and paranoia on Nora's face as Demeter, and I was curious how they would perform this song. After the initial fear subsided, Nora let loose their anger, tearing into their lines with visible disgust for the Mystery Cat, seemingly mocking him and not letting him hold power over them. Nora's voice suited Demeter well to me and I was enthralled with their performance, not venturing too much into the overtly sexual undertone that some performers are heavy-handed with. Erica as Bombalurina entered with her part, continuing on the momentum laid out by Nora, moving with a swagger all her own. Like Nora, she was not a caricature of what most people may expect from the character, allowing room for dimension. The fact that Erica has previous experience in the musical has likely benefitted her to refine how she wants to play Bombalurina, and it is noticeable in the audience, at least to me. Erica's voice is somewhat unique for Bombalurina, darker and more biting in tone, which paired well with her physical moments. Stalking around the stage, sometimes adding a growling-like vocalization behind her delivery, Erica further tore into Macavity, and was quite scornful. She helped in commanding the stage with Nora once the duet portion started, and Nora gave some shrieking vocals for the 'Or another Peke’s been stifled!’ line to add to everything. These two really personified their respective characters, with Nora offering a bit more bite shortly after. With the other Queens joining in to complete the song, the energy never faltered. It was definitely my highlight of the evening!

With (decoy) Old Deuteronomy returning to the stage, Nora immediately sensed that something was wrong and they looked absolutely *pissed* when they figured it what it was, becoming feral. With the look and attitude of completely ferocity, they jumped on the back of the decoy Deuteronomy, ripping and tearing away at their prey, unafraid of injury or what other fate awaited them. Exposing Macavity, played by Samuel Buchanan, the Tribe was on high alert, but the sneak attack prevented a coordinated response. Nora's anger turned back more into terror as it had been previously in the show, and at the point when the synchronized Cats are being controlled according to Macavity, just before he moves to collect Demeter, Nora looked like they were crying! Great stuff, as I love seeing the profound emotional connection to the role and the surroundings! Eventually Macavity, with Demeter is his grasp, is stopped by Munkustrap and the fight commences. Kade as Munkustrap again adds some drama, throwing himself around and to the ground as the fight continued, and appearing actually injured before Alonzo, played by Sammy Fossum, took over the fight, with the help of the remaining Tribe further on. Macavity disappears for good this time in the cover of darkness, and Nora and Kade slowly find one another in the spotlight.

Hank as Rum Tum Tugger returns to the forefront to help welcome Magical Mister Mistoffelees, played by Ibn Snell. As mentioned before, Ibn is a fantastic dancer and it now becomes his time to shine. With vocal support from Hank as Tugger, Ibn moved across the stage to enchant the Tribe (and crowd) and was the strong point in the scene, making the choreography seem effortless. The US Revival version of the song builds up momentum, with the help of Cassandra lighting up (still a highlight!) in the middle of the action, and Ibn as Mistoffelees is able to get the Tribe to conjure Old Deuteronomy back. Everyone is excited, Ibn does some more great dancing, and Hank presents Mistoffelees to 'Felines and Friends' around him! Great fun!

With the new day fast approaching, Sam as Sillabub provided some angelic vocals for the Daylight sequence, helping to usher in the ending stages of the show. I love her crystal clear vocals, and she really personifies the character! Munkustrap had his rest after the fight, Old Deuteronomy is back for good, and Grizabella is here once again to ruin the fun before the Tribe gets much further into the evening. Slinking onstage, Tayler as Grizabella is ready to give it one last go in front of the Tribe, recalling her Memory. With more emotional weight behind her acting and voice, I think that she has improved over last year. Sam as Sillabub provides her last moments of beautiful vocals in tandem with Tayler as Grizabella, just before the climax of the song. Tayler is still powerful vocally at this moment, and with the greater range of emotions compared to last time, it made a larger impact on me. All is quiet once the Glamour Cat has finished, with Yuka as Victoria taking Grizabella's hand to welcome her back.

The Journey to the Heaviside Layer had a great level of sentiment as usual, and the chorus of Cats was quite striking vocally once more, with Cameron as Old Deuteronomy powering over top of eveything, but not in a distracting manner. Grizabella once again exits in the paw of The Everlasting Cat, which is my favourite!

The finale is here, and it is time to Ad-Dress the Cats! With Cameron taking the lead as Old Deuteronomy, the Tribe and audience is reminded to take care of their kitties. Dreams of food and formal greetings make these some very happy Cats, and everyone got their chance to either be stoic or as silly as they wanted. It is clear that Cameron is a powerhouse on that tire, peaking his microphone at times. I was close enough to the stage that Cameron really did not need amplification, utilizing his chance to be more unrestrained vocally and he went for it! The power! The range! Thrilling to see and hear! It is doubtful that I will see many other performers outshine Cameron as Old Deuteronomy, so I am thankful for the experience!

Just like that the show is over and everyone gets their deserved bows and praise! I once again tried to cheer as loud as possible for Jellylorum, because she deserves it! Everyone else also got a sizable cheer from me as well. The final playout had Hank as Rum Tum Tugger flying across the stage to wring out every last admiration for the cast before what would be their last show for over three weeks due to the holiday break in December. He stayed even a bit past the final bows into the theatre walkout playout, and I believe he stole someone's phone to take a silly video or photos before departing for good!

With the official end of the show, I can say that this cast was extraordinary! I think the performers cast for this tour were great choices, and they all seemed to enjoy being onstage, which I appreciated seeing. There seems to have been more maturity brought forth with this cast, even with many of them being quite young in age. There still is my feeling that many of them are too young to be playing the roles they do, but it did not detract much from their performances. It is more of a minor gripe than a criticism I have. I enjoyed seeing everyone put on a fantastic show, even if I do not directly mention them or their characters explicitly above. Seeing only the single show, it was impossible to capture and view everything or everybody in the background, which is a bit disappointing for me, but there are so many background moments worth mentioning if seen, and I hope they keep it up!

In terms of my favourite performers:

Nora as Demeter really struck me in their portrayal and I had so much fun watching them really get into the character arc. They solidified the fact that Demeter can be played as scared, but moving past the fear and using those negative emotions turned into a weapon against abuse. I want to see Demeter tear apart Macavity, she deserves it! The character arc Nora provided was exactly what I wanted to see and I was not expecting them to give me just that! They were amazing!

Erica as Bombalurina brought some great mannerisms and experience to the role, and I think she really nailed what the character is like, showing off her many sides. There was an underlying seriousness to Erica's portrayal that went along with the usual Bombalurina sensuality and confidence. She even injected a bit of humour in the role that is so often played as one dimensional. I was so happy to see Erica onstage, and she was even better than I was anticipating given her previous time in the musical.

Allyson as Jellylorum was a lot of fun, and she played her as very cheery and excited, somewhat like an older Etcetera in many ways. Her characterization was fun to watch and her voice was very comforting, both great for Jellylorum. I am always ecstatic to see my favourite character onstage!

Yuka as Victoria was a (literal) bright spot throughout the show, and she was an amazing dancer! Her radiant happiness onstage was unparalleled and it brought me so much joy, even now when I think back to the show months later!

Sam as Sillabub was a welcome performance with her lovely voice! It fit with what I like to hear from the character. I did not mention any of her other song moments, but she looked to be having fun throughout the show when I caught them in my line of vision.

John as "Peter"/Bustopher Jones/Gus/Rumpus Cat was fantastic yet again! I have given him praise in my last review, which is true seeing him again, and he enforces that he is one of the best performers in all the worldwide companies.

Lexy as Cassandra did another great job onstage, and it is always a joy to see her own unique take on the character! Her dancing and movements have improved even over her flawless performance last year, and I was happy to see her again!

Lastly, Cameron as Old Deuteronomy was fantastic and really delivered vocally for the Jellicle Leader role. Getting a chance to experience a vocalist with such power was definitely a first for me, and the combination of these facets helped push the characterization I have for them.

I went to the stage door after the show (because of course after my three night stand in Ottawa), and was lucky to talk briefly to the performers, tell them they did a fantastic job, and have them sign the US Tour 6 windowcard I have owned for a few years (which they unfortunately do not make anymore).

A few performers recognized me from the Ottawa shows and a few others were aware of my account here (and Instagram probably), saying that they have heard a lot about me, which was not expected. I guess I am more known than I realize, which was never my intent, but it is nice to be appreciated. Not everyone who stopped signed (which is too bad), and a few performers snuck away before I could ask nicely, but I managed to get mostly everyone! It will serve as a wonderful piece of my CATS collection alongside the things from Ottawa (and everything else!).

I am grateful that I had the chance to see this wonderful cast once during this tour cycle, and they exceeded my expectations! Although this night may not have been as magical (in its own right) as seeing the musical live for the very first (and second and third) time in the stunning National Arts Centre, it was an incredible experience that I will not soon forget and was my favourite time seeing the show from a performance standpoint!

A special thanks and shoutout to the hard working cast and crew that put on this enchanting show for many months out of the year! I am glad to be one of the many spectators that get to experience the magical Junkyard in North America!

Until next time Kitties!

#CATS Musical #CATS the Musical #CATS US Tour 6 #Here it is for anyone interested #I use the word 'fun' a lot because that is what this musical is!#It was all so much fun and a great experience and if you have not seen the show you owe it to yourself to go!#I tried to proofread and make this sound reasonable as an informal stream of consciousness show report #The White Cat speaks

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christiangrest · 2 years

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A Clean Firearm is a Happy Firearm…

Everyone has their own opinions on how to clean their firearm, how often to clean them and what kind of cleaning supplies they prefer to use. I will be the first one to say it, but no method is perfect nor is any particular method the “correct” way to clean and lubricate a firearm. My cleaning methods and periodicity have changed many, many times over the years. Even the materials and tools I’ve used have also changed. As time progresses, there are always going to be newer products that come to market as well as newer cleaning tools that “claim” to do a better job. Of course this can be a very subjective subject…so let’s get started with my take on this hotly contested subject of firearm cleaning.

First off, Brownells will have virtually anything and everything a person may want or need to throw into their range box or workbench for keeping their firearms clean and happy. A few of my favorite items came from Brownells and they are the one piece nylon coated steel cleaning rods from Dewey Manufacturing. I first found out about these cleaning rods during my service rifle competition days. These rods have nice rotating nylon handles that rotate smoothly as you push your cleaning patches or brush down the bore. I also have a number of small portable cleaning kits and bore snakes from Otis. I tend to throw these in my range bags during trips. For bore solvents, I’ve always had a bottle of Sweets 7.62 bore solvent in my workbench, but it’s horrible to smell and you need a lot of ventilation when using it. I also keep a bottle of Hoppe’s No. 9 bore solvent which conversely has a wonderful smell in comparison. Who cares how well it works, so long as it smells great while cleaning, right? Slip 2000 gun oil has been my gun oil of choice up until fairly recently. Slip 2000 does a great job of adhering to the metallic surfaces and lubricating the moving parts. Wilson Combat however makes a tackier gun grease that I’ve used wherever grease is preferred over oil. More recently I’ve come to find some modern lubricants from small companies such as Aegis Gun care and Liquid Drip. Aegis gun care makes a really nice cleaning solution and lubricant. Liquid Drip makes a one in all CLP like gun oil that’s quickly replaced my other gun oils.

So how often do I clean my firearms? Well, the answer to that question largely depends upon the type of firearm, its use and number of rounds. The other variable to this question is whether it’s a collectible firearm/antique or something modern. When it comes to my old milsurp firearms that tend to be quite collectible, such as my M1 Garands, at a minimum I will run a few oily patches down the bores to protect the barrel from corrosion. Periodically I’ll take them apart for a thorough cleaning, but this isn’t necessary all that often unless I’m shooting matches. Taking an M1 Garand apart constantly can cause the stock lockup to get loose over time. Now my modern AR rifles will get cleaned whenever they start to get really dirty…I truly don’t have a set periodicity with the cleaning of my AR rifles. My hunting rifles get cleaned at the end of each hunting season, then seasoned/sighted in as the beginning of the hunting season. Probably the most cleaned firearm would be my EDC pistols. These collect lint very quick, so a weekly wipe down at a minimum is performed. After each range session they are thoroughly cleaned and function tested before going back into the rotation.

So are these cleaning schedules right for you? That’s your decision, but these methods of cleaning have worked for me for many, many years. I’ve known some people who ill totally break down their firearm, even after firing just 1-2 magazines through their firearm. Nothing wrong with this, but in my opinion, it’s quite unnecessary. Whatever you’re looking for to keep your firearms clean and happy, be sure to check out Brownells!

#brownells #brownellsinc #bureauofpropaganda #firearmmaintenance #firearmcleaning #guncleaning

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littlewalken · 2 months

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ap 17 part 2

Well, they're out of the body I wanted to buy for Shi Shi, the one without the head unless I look a bit more and see if there's one with a free outfit. Doesn't matter either way.

Did some patterns for the little Bebe lady and cut out and partially sewed a tea gown/wrapper for her. She'll be able to get at least 2 fancy dresses out of each fat quarter. Got plenty from when I thought the chibi Unoa was going to be more old fashioned when she decided right now she isn't.

Want to try out a few more ideas before I get in to the pink fabric. Most of it's going to be princess shaped 2 piece, the bodice is almost always separate, with a bit of a train.

What I miss the most right now is hot coffee, will be seeing a different dentist on the 19th so I'll ask them how much longer and all that. So far the bone graft is good, just some minor swelling.

Biggest thing is having to "rest" because of the blood loss. What ever kind of anemia I have I just literally don't make enough red blood cells.

Also have to avoid acidic and spicy stuff for awhile and keep to soft for a few days. ~looks at half a bag of cuties and the two boxes of lemon protein bars~

Starting to get ideas for a newer version of the Daft Punk meeting at a performing arts school. Guy needs someone to help him figure out how to put his routines together, Thomas needs someone to help him snaz his up.

Also can't sleep on my one side until the swelling goes down but that should happen soon.

Not going to say go to the dentist on a regular basis, I sure as hell don't, but the couple days discomfort for a root canal or something is better than suffering thru it. And say yes to dental bone grafts.

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jackmothperry · 9 months

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Face Melters: Electric Callboy Show Review

The German band Electric Callboy, albeit a newer moniker for them, is ridiculously well named: They have the electricity to run entire countries, and the tongue in cheek humor, the outright mockery of toxic masculinity, to keep you entertained while they relentlessly grind perfectly honed breakdowns into your soul.

They’re a band that demands space, yet still manages to thrive in smaller venues. It feels like a big show regardless of the reality of the stage, the crushing bodies, the equipment tetrising around itself. They belong in an arena; they would absolutely bring down a house of thousands upon thousands of people. Electric Callboy’s chemistry with themselves is enough to power an entire show, they do not need the audience to be right on top of them.

But with an audience on top of them? They absolutely crush it. The audience. Under their electric dance moves. Their strong vocals. The humor, the costumes, the face melting metal riffs.

Wednesday, August 30th, was a hot day in Los Angeles. The anticipation for the show had me earlier to the Belasco than I care to admit, although I did explore the area (and hide in air conditioning) a bit as to not linger and swelter too long. I was fully intending on getting barricade, as it is no longer the moshing days of my youth (last year when I got a concussion at Aftershock) and because I wanted to soak in every moment and every piece of paper shrapnel that launched itself out of the confetti cannons.

I was vaguely aware of the opening bands, and by the time I got in and skipped my way to the barricade, I knew I was going to have to allocate my energy wisely. This wound up being more challenging than I had thought, as Conquer Divide, from Michigan, was an impressive force, with strong beats and melodic singing intertwined with carnage so lovingly that it was hard to keep still. And to be honest I didn’t really try that hard to resist.

Solence, from Sweden, made it even more challenging. I knew one of their songs because it had somehow magically made its way to my work out playlist (Good Fucking Music, indeed), and I did leave my skin and writhe around for a while to that one along with…well every song they played, actually.

But I knew, I knew I had done it. I had saved enough energy to properly experience Electric Callboy. The surrounding crowd had as well, you could feel it in the air. Said crowd was largely comprised of, what seemed like, the goofy guys from frat movies, the metal heads that are actually quite sweet once you get past their battle vests and incredible tattoos, and the hot goth gf everyone wishes they had, along with a smattering of small children. There were multiple renditions of the Sponge Bob Square Pants theme betwixt sets, as well as some powerful Barbie Girl acapella and doo doo practicing for the inevitable Hypa explosion.

By the time our train attendant who graces us before every Electric Callboy performance appeared on the screen, we were sweaty, we were smelly, we were absolutely buzzing for this.

The moment the techno (Tekkno?) beat is taken over by the guitars, bass, and drums, respectively, of Daniel, Pascal, Daniel, and David, can probably be described super poetically like the wings unfurling of a great dragon here to fuck you up - it’s absolutely a beautiful resounding moment that shows you this is not your normal metal show.

After that, I was a man possessed. I thrashed so hard that by the second song, one of the two singers, Kevin, who is usually screaming and pig squealing expertly, was gently asking if I was okay. He gave me a high five, and I was a kid again, my heroes in front of me probably not that much older if at all than I am.

A very nice security guard forced me to drink water (I had refused previous generous attempts because I am not actually that young and my bladder had to be absolutely silent until the end of the show) and I was probably pretty pathetic looking for that all to happen only two songs in. But did I care? No. I was there to rock. And I was going to rock with every fiber of my being.

The music is such a dopamine rush of constant movement that it makes sense to have some breaks, if not for us, then for them. The only time (outside of a few German moments, of course), I stumbled over the lyrics to a song was their version of Let It Go from Frozen. The notes hit were absolutely golden though. And we got a Backstreet Boys throw back in the mash up and thank god I was a kid in the 90s so that one I could join in on.

To go into each song and how every note absolutely wrecked me and how would take too long, but a notable one was Castrop X Spandau: the aforementioned German moments were big in this one (at home I swear ich spreche verdammt fließend), but the sound absolutely skins you alive - strips you of all sanity and makes your spine try to leave your body.

Every Time We Touch, Hypa Hypa, We Got The Movies, and Pump It are all pillars in the show that hold everything up while the others threaten to break our bodies with metal. The first mentioned is a nostalgic classic that they’ve refreshed with the Electric Callboy touch. It’s a great gateway song for the people in your life who aren’t quite ready for Hypa Hypa and would absolutely stop trusting you with the aux cord (the metaphorical one in the age of bluetooth) if you threw on Hurrikan. Sidenote, Hurrikan went so hard. I can’t even imagine what carnage happened behind me at that drop. Did I want to mosh? Desperately. Am I bruised from moshing with the barrier? A bit. A bit.

The best part of the show, in my opinion, was the aforementioned chemistry between the band members. Nico and Kevin have a bromance for the ages, to be sure, but the lesser mentioned duo is Daniel and Daniel. Daniel, the guitarist, and Daniel, the bassist, exist largely on the left side of the stage where I had chosen to be as well. And what a good choice that was. They are a comedy show all their own; there was spanking, tandem dance moves, fancy guitar tricks, and general tomfoolery to be had. I was consistently entertained by them in between the moments they melted my goddamn face off.

Pascal absolutely owned the guitar on the other side of the stage, and came to visit us to just casually remind us he is also excellent at melting faces. I saw later photographic evidence that I had missed some kissing and tomfoolery on the right side of the stage, so it’s definitely a different show depending on where your attention is held. There really isn’t enough kissing in metal.

David, the drummer, had his moment to shine outside of all the other moments he was constantly shining because that man is a beast. He absolutely crushed a solo remix of Sandstorm, owning the stage alone easily. He drips with charisma and yet doesn’t come off as a walking ego with drumsticks, even though he would get away with it if he did.

Nico and Kevin make me forget it’s unusual to see two singers (I suppose a singer and a screamer isn’t super unusual, but they’re both full fledged lead singers in my book). They both represent that core humor so well, with their natural disarming charm and yet both utterly wreak havoc at the same time.

The whole band is a mash up of gentleness and edge, of humor and of darkness. It’s such a comforting chaos that I turn to them time and time again when I need to cheer up, work out, or violently shriek. This concert cemented to me that they’re my favorite band, and I think America, selling out every tour date they have, agrees with me.

The show ended strong, they gave us their moves and their fake bowl cuts, and we all were left vibrating with a great sense that we had just witnessed something otherworldly.

Thanks for absolutely crushing us, guys.

#electriccallboy #germany #german metal #metal review #los angeles #concert review #hypa hypa #solence #conquer divide #review #jmpreviews

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ancestorsofjudah · 10 months

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1 Kings, Chapter 1: 1-10. "Why do you behave as you do?"

A Jewish king is the embodiment of the sefira of malchut and therefore very different than the autocratic king of the nations of the world.

In contrast to King Ahasuerus, for example (or Saddam Hussein, in our day and age), whose authority was not subject to any guidelines or legal standards, a Jewish king serves as a living example to the nation (and thus, to the world) of total commitment to the service of G‑d, with total subservience and self-nullification to G‑d's will.

What happens when this example starts to wain or there is competition from a newer, younger, more popular contender for the king's power?

The Book of Kings has the answers:

Adonijah Sets Himself Up as King

1 When King David was very old, he could not keep warm even when they put covers over him. 2 So his attendants said to him, “Let us look for a young virgin to serve the king and take care of him. She can lie beside him so that our lord the king may keep warm.”

The Gematria for this section, 14862, א‎ד ח‎ו‎ב‎ adchav, or ado chayyah, means "a continuous love song" in paricular one performed by a psalter, and we just happen to have the most famous one of them all, King David, handy. Except he's not feeling it anymore. What happened and what was done to jump start his heart?

Our verb αδω (ado) evidently emphasizes the human voice, and thus the text-part of a song. This in contrast to the noun ψαλλω (psallo), which rather emphasizes the string-strumming side of it. Closer akin αδω (ado) than ψαλλω (psallo), noun υμνος (humos) describes a song with a specific ceremonial function, particularly one to do with binding parties together. The Hebrew equivalent of our verb plus noun is שיר (shir), meaning both song and to sing.

chayya= to live, have life, remain alive, sustain life, live prosperously, live for ever, be quickened, be alive, be restored to life or health.

3 Then they searched throughout Israel for a beautiful young woman and found Abishag, a Shunammite, and brought her to the king. 4 The woman was very beautiful; she took care of the king and waited on him, but the king had no sexual relations with her.

Abishag= Father of Wanderers, the Jews

אב

The noun אב ('ab) means father, but describes primarily a social relationship rather than a biological one. That social fatherhood was the defining quality of the community's alpha male, the one around whom all economy revolved and from whom emanated all instructions by which the 'sons' (בן, ben) operated. It's unclear where this word אב ('ab) comes from but the verb abu means to decide.

שגה שגג

The verb שגג (shagag) means to mislead, err or go astray. The derived noun שגגה (shegaga), means deception, error or deviation. Verb שגה (shaga) also means to err or wander off. Derived noun שגיאה (shegia) means error, and משגה (mishgeh) means mistake.

Shunammite=

שאן

The verb שאן (sha'an) literally means to be undisturbed. In practice it denotes being comfy, relaxed and at ease. Adjective שאנן (sha'anan), means unmoved in the sense of being perpetual, inattentive or complacent.

SO they brought the lovelorn King David a "contented wanderer" to be his lover. The plot is getting thicker.

5 Now Adonijah, whose mother was Haggith, put himself forward and said, “I will be king.” So he got chariots and horses[a] ready, with fifty men to run ahead of him. 6 (His father had never rebuked him by asking, “Why do you behave as you do?” He was also very handsome and was born next after Absalom.)

Adonijah= "The human foundation."

The verb אדן ('dn) means to provide support for a piece of superstructure: to be a base for something big to stand or rotate upon. The noun אדן ('eden) refers to the foundation, base or pedestal of pillars or panels and such, and this word features lavishly in the description of the tabernacle.

The tabernacle, of course, was a prototype of the temple, which in turn became embodied by God's living human congregation, and the bases and foundations of that living temple became personified by the human foundation known as אדון ('adon) or אדן ('adon), roughly translatable with lord, sir or mister.

Haggith= "The Festival Compass."

חגג

The verb חגג (hagag) means to gather for a feast or celebration, particularly those that were prescribed to occur yearly. Noun חג (hag) means feast or festival gathering.

The verb חוג (hug) means to draw round or make a circle. Noun חג (hug) means circle, cycle or circuit. Noun מחוגה (mehuga), meaning circler or compass.

50 Chariots, men and horses=Gematria of 1227, אב‎באֶפֶסז‎ , abba epsez, which means "father of a flying hat." Meaning a man who has been circumcised and is wearing a helmet, meaning he is strong, fierce. He has some of God's qualities, looks, intelligence, but he is also prone to arrogance.

The root cluster עוף ('wp), עיף ('yp), and יעף (y'p) appears to reflect a general sense of elevation, and from that come words that have to do with flight, or with being eminent, or with overshadowing and hence covering or protecting. This cluster is arguably one of those Scriptural phenomena that reflect the vast complexity and simultaneous simplicity, intelligence and efficiency of the Hebrew language. In translations this verbal unity must sadly be fractured, and a large majority of Bible enthusiasts will never know what treasures lie within.

According to scholars, there are two separate roots עוף ('wp), one having to do with flight, the other with darkness. But in the Hebrew mind these two ideas aren't separate at all. A more common word for wings or winged creature is כנף (kanap). The associated verb is כנף (kanep), and means to hide or enclose.

Then, one of the two roots עוף ('wp) also occurs in the form עיף ('yp), and there is one more root עיף ('yp), which appears to be a by-form of one of two roots יעף (y'p), while the other seems to tie into עוף ('up).

7 Adonijah conferred with Joab son of Zeruiah and with Abiathar the priest, and they gave him their support. 8 But Zadok the priest, Benaiah son of Jehoiada, Nathan the prophet, Shimei and Rei and David’s special guard did not join Adonijah.

Yes, Ado should be king:

Joab=Whose father is the Lord

Zeruiah=is formed (from a rock)

Abiathar=into excellence

The verb יתר (yatar) means to remain or to be a rest (a remainder). It may emphasize the survival of some carnage (being the last ones left), but it may also emphasize surplus (rest money after all bills are paid). Noun יתר (yeter) means remnant; יתרה (yitra) means abundance; יותר (yoter) means superiority; יתרון (yitron) means excellence.

No, Ado should not:

Zadok= to be righteous

The verb צדק (sadeq) means to be just or righteous; to be efficient with social energy. Adjective צדיק (saddiq) means just or righteous, noun צדק (sedeq) means justice or rightness, noun צדקה (sadaqa) means righteousness.

Benaiah=build the houses

The verb בנה (bana) means to build, mostly of stone buildings and thus of houses and thus of families and dynasties: hence the association between this verb and the nouns אבן ('eben), stone, and בן (ben), son.

Noun בניה (binya) means a building in the sense of a structure. Noun מבנה (mibneh) means building in the sense of place of building. Noun תבנית (tabnit) means building in the sense of the act of building: a construction, pattern or image.

Jehoiada=Learn as much as possible

ידע

The verb ידע (yada') means both to know and to have intimate relations (Genesis 4:1, Judges 11:39). Knowledge equals familiarity with truth, which in turn is the only thing all people can agree on, which in turn promotes the search for agreement and modes of expression (rather than mere data). The Bible holds all knowledge in the highest regard. God, after all, is both a God of knowledge (Jeremiah 3:15) and love (1 John 4:7).

Since all truth relates to the Word of God, wisdom begins with the reverence of the Creator (Proverbs 1:7) and learning equals love-making within a marital relation with the Creator (Isaiah 54:5).

Nouns דעה (dea), דע (dea') and דעת (da'at) all mean knowledge. Nouns ידעני (yidde'oni), מודע (moda') and מדעת (moda'at) describe familiarity or kinship. This root's Greek counterpart is γινωσκω (ginosko)

Nathan=grow up, hone yourself

The shape-shifting verb נתן (natan) means to give in a broad bouquet of senses, from regular giving or bestowing, to setting or putting, to transforming one thing or situation into another.

This verb's three nouns מתן (mattan), מתנה (mattana) and מתת (mattat) all mean gift, again broadly ranging from a regular present to an offering to an innate talent (being "gifted").

Shimei=speak for the right causes

The verb שמע (shama') means to hear and may also mean to understand or obey. Noun שמע (shema') means sound. Nouns שמע (shoma') and שמועה (shemu'a) mean tidings, report or mentions. Noun השמעות (hashma'ut) describes that which is caused to be heard. Noun משמע (mishma') means rumor or a thing heard. Noun משמעת (mishma'at) refers to a group or listeners.

Rei=be a loyal companion

9 Adonijah then sacrificed sheep, cattle and fattened calves at the Stone of Zoheleth near En Rogel. He invited all his brothers, the king’s sons, and all the royal officials of Judah, 10 but he did not invite Nathan the prophet or Benaiah or the special guard or his brother Solomon.

Ado fattens the calves- he bribes members of the Court, leaves his special guard and a few key officials behind. He wants to be the king but he does not yet know how. His willpower is focused on being a king instead of being sovereign over himself. A special guard follows a king to make sure the latter happens instead of just the former.

He goes through the motions, but without the presence of the entire dynasty, they are not enough. An important test looms for him, and he has to pass it and make to the final stop: Tzaddik.

Zoheleth near En Rogel=The Serpent's Stone which covers a famous well. Adonijah as David's son must roll the stone away, expose the well and thus like a Jewish King Arthur, become the cornerstone of the Kingdom and the new Temple. Thus the syntax between father and son will be complete, and a Tzaddik will be born.

The word “Even” for Stone is made up of three letters, אבן – (Alef-Beit-Nun). Rebbe Nachman, following the Rashbam, comments that the word is a combination of the words “Av” (Father) and “Ben” Son,

“This is (Genesis 49:24) “…from there the Shepherd, the evan (the Rock) of Israel.” Onkelos translates [“EVaN” as a composite of] AV and VeN (father and son). This is the complete-statement: father and son as one. For a half-statement corresponds to the son alone, but the complete-statement is father and son as one. Everything is encompassed there, and through this one can come to the concept of shepherds, as above. Hence this is the meaning of, “from there the Shepherd, the EVaN of Israel.”

R’ Nachman of Breslov, Likutey Moharan I, 22:10, Volume 3, published by the Breslov Research Institute, pg 381

Knowing that the Even Shetiyah is the foundation of the world, we can now read Proverbs in a new light,

צַדִּיק יְסוֹד עוֹלָם

“The Tzaddik is the Foundation of the world.” Proverbs 10:25

The “Tzaddik” (Righteous One) has a special connection to the Even Shetiyah. It is in his merit that the world stands.

"This verse refers to the Messiah, the descendant of David. Why was he called a great mountain? Because he will be greater than the patriarchs, as is said: Behold, My servant shall prosper, he shall be exalted and lifted up, and shall be very high (Isa. 52:13). He shall be exalted above Abraham; lifted up above Isaac; and shall be very high above Jacob.He shall be exalted above Abraham, concerning whom it is said: I have lifted up my hand unto the L-rd (Gen. 14:22); lifted up above Moses, of whom it is said: That you should say unto me: Carry them in your bosom (Num. 11:12); and shall be very high like the ministering angels, concerning whom it is said: As for their wings, they were high (Ezek. 1:18). Hence Scripture says: Who are you, O great mountain?” Midrash Tanchuma, Siman 14, translated by Samuel Berman, Sefaria.org [7]

Attendants, festival times provide a map of the wells of the Sefirot and ensure each one stays lit and one's sovereignty is maintained. Except both David and his son were wavering from it. One was running too cool, the other too hot. Under these conditions, which lack moderation, a Tzaddik, the next king would not be born.

This is an emergency and causes the campus to buzz with activity, drawing all the attendants together into a conference.

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dritahm · 2 years

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Tiny player addon

#TINY PLAYER ADDON FULL#

CyrHUD Quick CompassĪs the name suggests, Quick Compass is a nice little addon that adds a small movable compass to your screen (alongside many small additional Quality of Life features). This information is especially useful and valuable if you are either a newer player who needs help figuring out to which location to go, or if you are trying to farm Alliance Points and want to have an easy way to determine which fights are about to end and which fights will be lasting much longer. While many combat-related addons are useful in most PvP environment, some are more useful in Cyrodiil and Imperial City only, as those have a lot of mechanics that are unique to just them: CyrHUDĬyrHUD adds a unique UI element to the screen which displays each flagged keep, resource or town – and those that are under attack or are being sieged. It even allows you to set a render limit of your choice to make sure it uses just as much processing power as you want it to, and doesn’t harm your game’s performance! Greyskull is fully customizable, from size and colors to damage amounts and stat tracking. You can set the addon to display different colors based on the amount of damage stat you have every moment, the make it shift colors throughout a fight to give you a clear and easy indication of when you are fully buffed and ready to deal damage and when you better wait for a different moment to deal your burst, without having to look at each of your active buffs. It adds a neat, small UI piece that displays your existing damage stat at any given moment. Greyskull is the best way to keep track of your Weapon or Spell Damage. However, it’s important you make sure to enable the addon to work in Cyrodiil and PvP without going into Light Mode in the addon settings, as that option is disabled on the addon by default! Combat Metrics (CMX) Greyskull If you ever died and couldn’t figure out why, had issues sustaining and couldn’t understand what’s draining all of your resources, or anything of similar nature – CMX is your solution to that.

#TINY PLAYER ADDON FULL#

CMX provides an incredibly detailed combat log that keeps track of previous fights and engagements and allows you to view the full information of each of them, see the order of casts and actions that happened throughout it, and get a lot of analytical information about it. If you’re an experienced PvE player, this addon should be familiar to you, but it’s just as relevant for PvP gameplay as it is for PvE. It supports chat notifications, and even allows you to set Alliance Points goals and track your progression towards them. In addition to all of those, AP Meter provides many relevant features, such as tracking your progression towards your next Alliance Rank, displaying statistics about your AP gains, and more. It has a compact and easy to read display that shows you your Alliance Points earned per session, the session’s duration, and even states in which location you are registered on the map, to help you determine if you are within a keep’s tick range. Action Duration Reminder AP MeterĪP Meter is simply the best addon out of the many options that exist, to track your alliance points gain. I personally still use it 7 years after starting to play the game. In addition, it has an option to add an “off-bar” element to your screen, to show you the remaining duration for the abilities that are slotted on your 2 nd bar, that isn’t currently active.ĪDR has many additional features that helps it’s users take notice when specific buffs run out, and is super customizable.ĭefinitely recommended to use for any new players who struggle with buffs management, and even for experienced players. It helps you view which of your buffs are active and displays the remaining duration for each without taking any screen space at all, by adding a duration text to all the currently-active skills on your bar. Here are my personal Essentials: Action Duration ReminderĪDR is a fantastic addon for buffs management. Some of these addons, however, are more essential than others, and provide a lot of useful information without taking a lot of resources to run or harming performance. There are many addons that I personally find useful and helpful for the ESO PvP experience, as the base-game UI is quite lacking at times and there’s a lot of information that isn’t displayed by default.

#Tiny player addon

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womenfashionandstyle · 2 years

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How To Find The Modest Swimsuit For Women?

People maintain their health and wellness in a variety of ways. Swimming is considered one of the ways you get overheat fatigue. The best form of exercise for being fit and healthy is swimming. If you are a regular swimmer or know how to swim, you know it is a rather fun activity. For those of you who like to maintain modesty while swimming, it becomes crucial to find a swimsuit that fits the definition.

There are various advantages to wearing a modest swimsuit for women. The majority of everyday clothing is made of materials for water contamination. Swimsuits allow more natural and efficient swimming while keeping you light. They could be utilized not only by competitive swimmers but also by regular people. Use modest swimwear instead of your everyday clothes whenever possible. You will notice a significant difference in the performance.

Women's swimsuits

Separate swimwear is available for each gender. Men's clothing could occasionally include a shirt, and they could also swim in trunks or briefs. Women's swimwear, on the other hand, consists of a top and bottom. They could be a one-piece bathing suit that covers the center of the body or a two-piece bathing suit. Women dont have much trouble finding casual swimwear, but it could be challenging to find bikinis that cover the entire body, particularly in western nations.

For religious or personal reasons, some women prefer to wear full-body swimsuits. These flexible swimsuits provide coverage from the neck to the ankles. They are specially made for women who are not comfortable showing too much skin. These swimsuits also have the added advantage of protecting the entire body from water-related contaminants.

The search for modest swimwear

It can be difficult to locate modest womens swimsuits. Regular swimsuits are simple to find, but modest ones are relatively much harder to get your hands on. One can be relieved to discover a swimwear store and think, "Now I have swimsuits close by," but after visiting the store, they are typically let down.

It's not that there aren't many girls' swimsuits at the store; rather, modest swimwear is rarely shown, especially in western nations. More locations have to be available for any modest swimwear women. Some ladies become so discouraged that they give up on swimming altogether.

Common modest swimwear features

Many characteristics of modest swimwear are shared. Go through the list of these characteristics and think about the qualities you want most in a modest suit, and keep those qualities in mind when you go shopping. Consider buying swimwear that has a minimum of 50 for the sun protection factor (SPF) of the fabric. Swimwear can be preserved from chemicals and look newer for a longer time with chlorine-resistant fabrics.

Look for fabrics that don't stick to you even when they're wet. For women who don't want their figure to show through the swimsuit, they are perfect. Your swimwear should ideally be made of materials that dry quickly. Swimmers come with internal draw cords around the ankles and waist to keep the garment from riding up and Internal buckles to keep the shirt from riding up and secure the pants as well. The garment is kept secure by invisible zippers, which are undetectable from the outside. Your swimwear should be made of four-way stretch material to fit your movements. Front panels with two lines for more figure concealment and Integrated or standalone hoods to cover the entire body will help you to choose the perfect modest swimwear.

Swim head scarfs exist – make the most of them.

Headfirst jumping into the sea is not really recommended while wearing cotton turbans or headscarves. When they get wet, they suck up all the water and become heavy and frigid. Search for independent companies online that provide swimming and beach turbans. A great go-to option is this black tie-knot swim cap by Modora.

Past the shortage of manufacturers specializing in it, modest swimwear still has a long way to go. There aren't many styles that fit plus sizes, and occasionally there are too many ruffles and prints, and the only colors available are black and white. Additionally, the costs can be quite unreasonable.

For swimsuit designers who are familiar with the challenges of creating the best technical fabrications, it is a missed opportunity. In order to better serve their customers' requirements, the non-modest firms should attempt to develop their own modest swimwear.

#Women's Swimsuits #Swimsuit for Women #fashion #uk #women fashion #modora

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47crayons · 3 years

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so, you want to write a musician?

about me: i play viola and have experience in symphony orchestras, string orchestras, string quartets (+ a few other small ensembles), and solo performances. i've done some light composition, and have friends/family who play other instruments. while my musical history is extensive, by no means do i know everything or speak for everyone.

this guide will focus on classical music/how to portray classical musicians and things that aren't as easily researched.

quick overview of instruments in a typical symphony orchestra

upper strings (violin, viola), lower strings (cello, (double) bass; i've seen viola included here too, but it's more commonly classified as upper strings)

strings also technically includes harp and piano

woodwinds (flute, oboe, clarinet, bassoon)

depending on instrumentation, they may also have piccolo, english horn, bass clarinet, contrabassoon

saxophones are not traditionally in symphony orchestras due to it being a relative newer instrument! but this is changing because more contemporary composes are including sax parts

brass (trumpet, trombone, bass trombone, tuba, euphonium)

percussion (depends heavily on instrumentation, but common instruments are bass drum, timpani, snare, crash cymbal, xylophone, marimba)

some things you should research

where the hands are supposed to go!! i'd recommend you look at pictures of professionals in orchestra settings (ny phil, cso, berlin phil are all top tier). some musicians *coughs at yoyo ma* have less than perfect posture when they're performing solos (for the same reasons famous authors can break "rules")

necessary equipment including reeds, rockstops, different kinds of sticks/mallets, rosin, mouth pieces for whatever instrument you're writing

common misconceptions

loose/photocopied sheet music is not aesthetic—it's annoying and impossible to keep organized. folders and binders are fairly common especially when managing multiple ensembles.

original copies are often expensive and required to perform a piece (legally) for profit or otherwise (though i know a few people who have bent this rule)

not all performers are good composers (i myself have very little formal music theory training), but many composers have performance histories.

not all musicians can sing.

perfect pitch is both a blessing and a curse. notes can be slightly lower/higher but in tune with the context of the piece, which drives people with perfect pitch insane.

having perfect pitch does not guarantee someone will be a prodigy, and people don't need perfect pitch to be a talented musician.

drama in ensembles does exist, but it rarely gets in the way of rehearsal. same thing goes for good friends: if your characters have even a shred of common sense, they aren't going to be talking/messing around during rehearsal.

instruments (especially good ones) are extremely expensive. people very rarely store instruments on the wall or other displays for fear of falling.

instruments are very picky and require tuning every time. every time! it doesn't take long anyway. temperature and humidity can and will make instruments go out of tune or damage your instrument if not properly stored.

some people listen exclusively to classical music, but in my experience, that's definitely not the majority

like with anything, most musicians struggle with self doubt at one point or another.

musician culture

getting excited when we hear a piece we recognize

getting frustrated because we can't remember the name of the piece (after all, no lyrics to search)

being horrified when a non-musician actor is playing a musician. yes, we notice. yes, it's obvious.

if people are joking, it's likely to be about: violas (a quick search for "viola jokes" will tell you all you need to know) or trumpets (a reputation for being overly loud, playing and not)

putting stickers (places they toured, their orchestra, or just purely decorative) on cases is common, but not for everyone. same goes for pictures (of family, past concerts, or anything) on the inside.

scrambling for a pencil when the conductor says to mark something. pencils are a musicians best friend :D

asking (and forgetting) how to split double stops/two parts at the same time. sometimes one stand partner will play the top while the other plays the bottom, and sometimes this is split stand by stand.

this has NEVER resulted in a sexual top/bottom joke. please just. don't. also no g string jokes. it's just unrealistic.

awaiting the obligatory "it's one week before our concert, and you sound like this?!" lecture

not talking about music 100% of the time!!! they have lives outside of music (most of them, at least /j). especially to close friends, music is probably not going to be a conversation topic unless something is out of the ordinary (high stress, something funny from rehearsal, etc.)

bragging/talking about how often they practice is generally not welcomed. great, but other people don't need to hear it!

stages are hot and bright. there's no way a performer can see someone in the audience with the possible exception of the first row.

practicing

three words for you: love. hate. relationship.

slow practice (like really slow lots of people recommend half speed; good for focusing on the right notes, tone, phrasing, smooth transitions)

metronome practice (while playing, it's not annoying at all! it's helpful and requires a lot of focus; when NOT playing, it's annoying and loud because it needs to be heard over the playing)

drone practice (having a machine/website/another person play one note in the background; good for tuning and scales)

and too many more for me to detail

auditions

ensembles may have entrance auditions to determine who gets in and seating auditions to determine placement within the section.

adrenaline does not make us play better; it just makes us make mistakes. and then thinking about those mistakes causes more mistakes.

some instruments, especially those with less repertoire, have common excerpts that come up frequently (i can think of one in particular that i've played for three separate auditions this year).

stopping/starting over is not recommended ever, but if you do, it has to be 10x better. most audition judges aren't looking for perfection!! they want to see how your character can keep going after messing up.

sight reading (being given new music, having ~30 seconds to look at it, being asked to play) is never perfect. i don't care how talented your character is; if they think they nailed it, they aren't experienced enough to see all the phrasing/dynamics that they didn't incorporate. no one gets sight reading perfect!!!

perhaps most importantly, musicians are not all the same! they enjoy it for a number of different reasons and have diverse and interesting lives outside of music!!! more information about specific instrument groups under the cut :)

strings

callouses. with the exception of pianists, most string players (and especially professional ones) have callouses where they press down/pluck the strings. i also have one on my right thumb where i hold my bow. cellists and bassists might have them on their left thumb from playing higher notes in thumb position.

hickeys are also fairly common, though only some people get them. upper strings will get these by under their left jaw. cellists may have one from the wooden body resting on their sternum. some people (including hilary hahn and many many others) use a cloth for comfort and to prevent hickeys.

few people want a hickey, but it might suit a character who is constantly trying to prove themselves.

our fingers do not "glide" anywhere. you can get cuts/"string-burns" from pressing down too hard when shifting. cuts like those are the only reason someone's fingers will bleed, and it's rarer than you think.

upper strings are more prone to back/neck problems from the way they hold their instruments on one side. see also: shoulder pain.

finger cramps happen. they aren't too common, but most if not all strings have experienced at least one.

pianos require tuning every few years or else the chords will be out of tune. few pianists can tune their own instrument because of how complicated it is.

piano parts/accompaniments will have so. many. pages. a page turner may sit on the right of the pianist to turn the page.

woodwinds & brass

spit. so much spit. some instruments clean afterwards with a cloth; others have a spit valve which is as gross as it sounds.

proper embouchure, or how a musician uses the muscles in their face/lips, is tiring, and people actually get strong cheek muscles. they can also easily turn red, but it varies based on a person's facial complexion. see also: good lung capacity.

flute and piccolo are not dainty. piccolo requires as much air as a tuba. an old teacher of mine almost passed out playing piccolo when she was in college.

flutes and piccolos are high, but often not shrill depending on the level of the ensemble.

reeds last a few weeks (less if your character plays for hours a day) and can be expensive to buy.

keys and valves can get sticky especially on older instruments which can result in the wrong note or bad tone.

saxes, clarinets, flutes are more likely to "honk" on low notes.

oboes are more likely to feel "wispy" on high notes.

articulation comes from the tongue, especially for brass instruments, and conductors may ask for "tah" "pah" or "wah" sounds depending on the style of the piece.

percussion

callouses from the friction between hands and sticks/mallets.

there are so many types of sticks and mallets!!! make sure to take a look at what materials are good for what instruments/sounds.

cymbals, triangle, and bass drum are not easy to play, even though they look simple.

percussionists with the exception of timpani may play more than one instrument during a piece, and they're constantly moving around in the back during their rests.

percussion instruments are too expensive for most people to have everything they ever play. practice pads are very common in place of these instruments.

ability to play one instrument doesn't translate to different instruments. for example, many percussionists don't have experience playing set/drum set.

some of the things detailed here are heavily glossed over, so if you have any questions, i'd always be happy to talk about it with you; i may not have answers, but i will try to help as best i can!!!

since you read this far, have my favorite viola joke.

what's the difference between a violist and a large pizza?

a large pizza can feed a family of four :)

tagging some people who showed interest: @writing-is-a-martial-art @ashen-crest @kg-willie @owilder

#writing advice #writing resources #writing reference #music #wow this absolutely consumed me

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extravalgant · 3 years

Note

concept: the wizards' cards have textures based on their effects and how often the card is used, like literal playing cards that get worn over time. i know i shared this in the discord but i wanna see how u interpet it with art bc i cant art

AW THANK U FOR COMING TO ME LEAH im flattered u want to see my artistic interpretations omg

I REALLY LIKED THAT IDEA YOU PUT IN THE DISCORD... i never thought that the cards would get worn down over time through heavy use . ITS SUCH A GOOD IDEAAA most of your ideas are so good<33

that being sad i thought about it more in school while i was waiting for a friend to finish up in class and heres what i got

— i feel as if novice decks + cards have a sort of "block" on them - that means there is a spell that prevents newer wizards from putting too much magic into their spells and tiring themselves out quicker. the magic is more stilted, which is why some may fizzle more over others. but they are made specifically for new trainees in mind, so more experienced wizards dont use them.

(i hope the explanation makes sense....)

ANYWAYS . ill do it by groupings so elemental school is up

— i feel as if pyromancers are more prone to burning their cards and decks to a crisp - hence the charred edges around their cards. falmea has to teach novice pyromancers about fire safety and how to safely put out a fire caused by magic (rather than fire caused naturally, imo i think they're two different things)

— as they steadily grow more confident in keeping their flame up and consistent, these types of accidents will stop, and they would stop burning their cards too. however, i think that the charred edges remain simply because it's fire and you're going to expect it to get burned either way. but now there's a more smokey quality to the way that it smells and looks.

also. i think the words and appearance would also get smudged and disappear over time, so they would probably have to rely on their memory or the way that the card feels (or even cast it) to see which one it is.

— ALSO i think all spell cards all look the same, but the corners are marked with the schools colors<3 i think it looks cool

— for thaumaturges i feel as if they would always freeze their cards so that they would be unusable in battle - the magic cant really flow into a spell card when the card itself is just basically a chunk of ice omg

for this, i feel like greyrose would cross some classes with falmea - she teaches the pyromancers how to relax the grip on their flame, and falmea would teach the thaumaturges how to allow themselves to relax, flow out of their rigid state.

— as they learn to control the rate at which their ice magic manifests, their spell cards are instead dusted with a light shade of frost, that which can be easily cleaned off. the words can become a little bit more harder to read and a bit foggier, though, so sometimes they have a chance to cast the wrong spell.

— diviners are 100% wrecking their cards like crazy. some students would have to constantly get new sets of decks or spell cards because storm is such a strong school off the bat - lightning tears through the protective block sometimes, often times making them practically unusable.

some people drop out or switch schools because of this issue - it's too much work to have to constantly replace torn cards or learn how to rework your magic into a better way.

— i think with enough time, diviners can learn how to redirect magic into a more consistent way (because storm magic in general is very inconsistent) -- they are still more likely to tear their cards in a fight, but it starts more at the edges, rather than novices almost tearing huge chunks and bottom/top halves off.

— for conjurers i feel like theyre the types to start bending their cards - perhaps out of nervousness or habit. when you have an uptight teacher like cyrus, i think that kind of manifests itself into other behaviors.

— for some reason, i feel like their cards are more likely to shimmer and shine more. since their school mainly deals with the mind and creativity, the cards and decks reflect that. that being said, it may shimmer too much. to the point where novices can't even make out the creature of the card, and end up summoning the wrong one.

self-explanatory, but sometimes their mind may be clouded by other things, and i like to think that the mind and magic is connected, hence why it will affect the spell cards.

— for necromancers, i feel like when their magic takes the necessary sacrifice, it also ends up taking chunks out of the card too. you can have the right rituals down to perform a spell, but it doesn't mean the sacrificial aspect isn't the part that messes up most novices.

i think after diviners, necromancers come in at a close second at wrecking their cards. sometimes the whole card disappears and you're like "what the heck".

— sacrifice is a core part of the death school, so malorn and dworgyn teach the novices how to make the sacrifices smaller, more localized to the edges of the cards. it's why older, experienced wizards may have cards that look like they've been eaten around the edges.

— for theurgists, i feel like they're the school that doesn't wreck their cards most of the time. there's has to do more with growth than anything else, hence why i think their cards are the ones that are the least replaced.

rather, i think things begin to grow on and around the cards. tiny vines that tear through the spell cards, wrapping around the edges. they can be ignored most of the time, but if a life wizard has their emotions and magic tied particularly close, these vines can and will get out of hand.

— experienced and older theurgists will have these sorts of vines around the corners and edges of their cards, however it may differ on plant type. because magic is different for every person, the flowers that grow there might differ from each person. the spells are worn, but because of life's rejuvinating energy, they look considerably newer compared to other schools.

— AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST... SORCERERS . this one stumped me a lil bit im ngl. i think novices have problems with concentrating on flipping between each of the schools as their attacks and supports demand it.

cards that feel wet and soggy, dried in some places as they use an a elemental school card; cards that look transparent in some places, bits and pieces gone from spiritual schools; spotty and fuzzy writing that comes from using sorcery in their own school.

— ITS... A LOT TO HANDLE. which is also why some people may end up transferring out of balance. i feel like sorcerers may have a class with each of the teachers of the seven schools, to level each of the magics that come with handling all seven of them.

— older sorcerers may get special decks and spell cards to help prevent the spell cards from straight up getting destroyed or unusable. i like to think it has a time factor -- turning back time on the cards appearance so that it lasts longer, just to give a throwback to the sands of time storyline instance in mirage.

#val.answers #wizard101 #w101 #i hope this is what u were looking for omg #this post is... so long.... im sorry to everyone in the tag #BUT YEAHHHH i was thinking on it more at school and i managed to come up with this . i hope u like it<33 #im not sure these explanations make sense but i hope they do omg #long post

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fabricated-misslieness · 4 years

Note

Hey, can you do a Dazai x Port Mafia Executive Male Reader. Where reader is Dazai former partner before he gets replace by Chuuya and instead of Chuuya coming for Q and fighting Lovecraft its reader instead. Readers ability is like Shigaraki from bnha.

Dazai Osamu x sadistic!male reader

Ngl I was a little confused cause the last time I watched bsd was months ago.

Also made the reader sadistic because yes. i forgot the reason

Part 2

Requested: Yes

Word Count: 3859

Warnings: Mentions of suicide (Dazai stuff ofc), angsty boi

“You want me to pair up with this rookie?” You gesture in the vague direction of Dazai. You know he’s there, but you don’t act like it.

Dazai huffs, offended by your words. He crosses his arms. You weren’t giving him the best impression and if you were going to be partners, he at least had to tolerate you enough to keep his head on his shoulders.

“Now, now,” Mori chides with a sweet tone. You don’t trust the guy, he may act kind, but you’re sure he hides something with that kindness. “He’s already a port mafia executive.” You roll your eyes, he was only one of them because he witnessed the old boss handing down his title ‘willingly’. You seriously doubted he did do it willingly, seeing as it was a mere few minutes before his death. That sort of coincidence belongs to a movie.

“Like I don’t know that.” You shake your head. “Fine, fine, I’ll be his partner. I only want to know what he can do. He has an ability, doesn’t he?”

You finally acknowledge his presence, turning to him and sizing him up. Dazai is flustered by the gesture, but he pretends to act calm and collected, something that works with that young poker face of his.

“Yes--” Mori is interrupted by the executive himself, who is eager to show off.

“Yes, I do.” Dazai replies, uncrossing his arms. “But what’s yours?”

You furrow your eyebrows. Abilities are wide and unique, ranging from psychological to physical to straight magic. Knowing your ability could be a part of his ability. You were to work together so he’d know either way, but at the moment, you wanted to know his weaknesses.

“That’s valuable information.” You crack your knuckles and stretch, pretending to prepare for a fight.

“No fighting in my office.” Mori reminds you. “Or the building, for that matter. One of your abilities is particularly destructive, and we don’t know what you could do. Go to the training area if you’re going to fight.”

You give both of them a smirk, “Who says I was going to fight? I was merely enjoying the look in Dazai’s eye.”

Dazai frowned, quickly fixing his composure. It’s true, he was a little intimidated and he did not mean to let it show.

“You’re quite sadistic, aren’t you?” Mori chuckles, shaking his head.

“That’s one thing right about me, boss.” You smile brightly. Dazai furrows his eyebrows and examines you. That smile of yours is sickeningly sweet, almost mocking. You look like a monster, but maybe that was part of your act. He’d know your ability in no time.

“Well, as partners you do have to know each other’s abilities. I picked Dazai specifically for you.” That gave each of them a hint to each other’s abilities, more to Dazai than anything.

You nod letting out a sigh, “Do you have anything you don’t want, Mori?”

Dazai quirks an eyebrow, interested in the peculiar question. Mori nods, nudging forward a tongue depressor, those big wooden popsicle sticks, one he could very well spare.

You pick up with all but one finger, your middle finger, holding it up for both of them to see. “Do you have anything for the debris?” Mori slides a metal tray towards the edge of the table.

“Pay close attention, Dazai.” You give him a glance before looking back at the stick, putting your final finger on it. It disintegrates in a matter of seconds, turning into pieces so small that they look like ash. “What’s yours?” You turn to him.

Dazai seems to shrink under your gaze, but he keeps a stoic look. “Put your hand on my arm.” You raise an eyebrow. Does he wish to experiment with your ability or is it part of his?

You put your hand on his arm, once again with all but one finger. You don’t trust him, that much is clear.

“Trust me.” The look he gives you is genuine, albeit the smile is devilish, though you oblige all the same.

Your eyebrows furrow when your ability has no effect. The skin doesn’t disintegrate, nor does it fall apart as usual. “That is my ability, No Longer Human.”

“And that is why I paired you two up.”

You huff a little angrily once you realize. His ability stops other abilities, what triggered it you didn’t know, but that wasn’t the most important thing for you. He paired you two up to have him be your control. You don’t need anyone to control you and you don’t want anyone to control you. You want to do you and you do not want this boy to hold you back.

You open your mouth to protest but Mori interrupts you. “This is my decision and mine alone, you cannot say otherwise.” As much as you want to mess up his pretty face, you couldn’t disobey the boss.

“Fine.”

As time grew on, Dazai had become a friend, though sometimes he felt like more than a friend. Despite your early refusal to the idea, you’d really warmed up to each other.

Dazai, the young bastard, was also quite the prick at times. Though you couldn’t really complain about his age since it turns out you’re within the same age range. While he was a prick, he was also caring, as you’d come to learn.

Sometimes he’d hold your forearm when you were touching something, even though over the years you’d built up the habit to not use your middle finger. Every time he did so you would laugh and it would somewhat fluster you, you’d tell him you didn’t need it and without fail he would say “Just in case.” It was nice to know he cared, and the other little gestures he would perform were even nicer.

You were known for being a little sadistic, taking joy from inflicting pain for no reason. When he’d hold you back from attacking some random lackey at the time it would make you angry, but a few minutes later you’d be grateful for it. After all, that lackey wouldn’t be very useful with an injury.

Though sometimes even he couldn’t hold you back. When you’d start a fight with another executive just for your enjoyment, he was quick to be there and keep you in touch. Perhaps you did need control after all.

The other executives were rather thankful for Dazai, as you chose someone to pick on every week. Something you hated about Dazai was that he was immune to your mockery. He got used to it from your partnership and he couldn’t be hurt by your ability. But you supposed it was for the better, the other executives were starting to get really annoyed by you.

Except everything changed when Nakahara came along.

Although your partnership was relatively new, you found comfort in each other’s companies. You protected each other’s weaknesses and complemented each other’s strengths; so when the news came along that Chūya would replace you as Dazai’s partner, both of you were a little ticked off, per say.

Dazai’s first impression on the newer rookie didn’t help their relationship. Chūya annoyed him to the very ends of the Earth and he did not want him to replace you. It wasn’t just Chūya either, he’d grown very fond of you. Sometimes he couldn’t even fight without you; He was used to you being there to back him up, though this detail he would not tell you.

In time, you didn’t look like the monster he’d thought you were in his first impression of you. You actually looked sweet.

Your smile, which for everybody else would be sadistic, turned out to look more endearing to him. Everybody caught onto the fact that the smiles you’d directed at him weren’t the smiles he’d show others. Somehow you hadn’t realized it, but he had.

You’d grown to like him, dare say crush on him, which was something you denied. His triumphant smile after the end of a mission and the jokes he’d make as you fought were always the highlight of your day.

None of you wanted to give up the other.

“This is his decision and his alone, we cannot say otherwise.” You mocked, making Dazai snicker. The fact he used the same words was quite ironic, really.

Tomorrow marked Chūya and his first mission together, so you’d dedicated this day to each other. Dazai did not look forward to tomorrow, and as much as he wanted to vent to you about Chūya’s very abundant annoying qualities, you’d both promised not to talk about it.

The news of your separation had made both of you realize your growing crushes for each other. You were no longer in denial, though you loathed the idea… but when you really thought about it, you didn’t loathe the idea. Musing to yourself about hugging him, playing with his hair… thinking about the fact that you did in fact like it made you gag.

As the night neared to an end, your guts told you to tell him. You wouldn’t see each other all that often anyway and if you were never to interact much, at least you would be getting this off your chest.

“Dazai.” You both stared out the window of the HQ, prior to you speaking up you were in an awkward silence. None of you wanted to say goodbye.

He turned to you and you to him. As much as you wanted to avoid eye contact, you thought it might help. “I like you… don’t joke with me.”

Dazai was going to make a joke. It was amazing how much you got to know him in so little time. He smiled, and your hopes raised when you took notice of how it wasn’t pitiful. “I like you too.”

You immediately let go of the breath you didn’t know you were holding.

“Where’s the big sadistic lion?” Dazai questions, playfully mocking how meek you are right now. His smile seems more joyful than usual, as it should with what just happened.

You snicker, giving him the sadistic smile he’s used to. “I’m right here.”

Dazai was your anchor in the Port Mafia, even when he plead for double suicide with you. Before you were partnered up, you absolutely despised the place. The other executives and the occasional lackeys were fun to provoke but it was almost as if that was your coping mechanism. You often complained about how awful the Mafia was handled with the previous boss, but he would never change anything. He was an idiot up until his very death.

You thought Mori’s recent ‘crowning’ would change your opinion, but it didn’t change it at all. You still hated the place. It was almost as if their only objective was to keep their hands on Yokohama. You wanted more than that, you wanted the whole of Japan to be your turf.

Mori didn’t want that and while he would take the opportunity once presented, he wouldn’t do a thing otherwise. He was perfectly happy with that and you weren’t.

Dazai was the only reason you stayed, but now the reason had been diminishing. You barely spoke and barely hung out. This wasn’t what ‘dating’ was and both of you knew it.

He wanted to try harder and so did you, but with your current situation, you couldn’t. When he wasn’t with Chūya, you were out on a mission. No, you weren’t jealous. This wasn’t Chūya’s fault nor was it something either of you could control. There were various times you debated on breaking up.

Dazai was the only thing holding you back from leaving, so if you broke up you didn’t have to worry about him. But you liked him and both of you would be heartbroken. You never liked thinking about it, but someday, it had to be addressed. That day never came.

The final day you were with the Port Mafia was the day that you had a brush with death.

You’d called for backup, you’d received none. The henchmen you were commanding left like cowards. To think these were the people you’d trained.

One of your big weaknesses was fighting groups of people alone. These henchmen knew that and they’d run. Where were their morals? Where was their faith, their loyalty? Where was their honor, their pride? It was then that you’d learned the Port Mafia wasn’t your place. These people weren’t your people, this turf wasn’t your turf. They were cowards and you were no coward.

Alone and fighting recklessly, you were down. You refused to flee, and that stubbornness was what caused you to nearly die. Luckily, you never crossed death’s doorstep. The people you were fighting presumed you dead the moment you dropped to the ground.

They were fools but a fool you were too to let your emotions get the best of you.

That day somebody had found you on the brisk of death. They claimed to be a spy and they offered to get you help.

Of course, you accept without asking for conditions. You were dying, what else could you have said? The conditions turned out to be joining his organization and feeding them with information or something equally as important.

No longer would you be associated with the Port Mafia. You were glad to leave them. But your only consequence being leaving behind Dazai, the love of your life and the highlight of the day. It was a hard decision to make that was for sure, but it was either this or death.

You felt selfish.

Months after joining them, the so-called ‘Guild’, your heart ached. Leaving Dazai was your biggest mistake but joining the Guild was the best thing that had happened to you since him. For the longest time, you’d wanted to tell him. You never had the guts to. And then you left Japan to join the bigger part of the guild in North America.

In time you’d stopped thinking about Dazai.

The crew was polite, a contrast from the cold lackeys and executives from the Port Mafia. It’s a nice change, one you wish won’t ever change. But maybe the hope of a different life blinds you from how bad these people really are, their underlying motives and morals, their similarities to the Port Mafia executives.

The guild is ambitious, their leader most of all. They have a turf and the turf is way bigger than the Port Mafia’s, something you’re proud about. You certainly feel better about this place than the Port Mafia.

Your sadistic personality never changes either, and while the others are certainly annoyed by it, they handle it in a different way. They make sure you know that you can’t hurt them severely, or there’ll be repercussions. Maybe not repercussions from the Guild’s rules, but them hurting you back. It’s a nice change, one that gets your adrenaline pumping every time you pick a fight.

The only time you did think of him was in your nightmares, the middle of the night. Those nightmares consisted of him calling you a traitor, betrayer, but that wasn’t what hurt you. They played out scenarios of you telling Dazai.

He’d kiss you, hold you tight, ask you where you’d been, question the new stitches and scars… and then you’d tell him.

His face would be ridden with denial. “No. No you couldn’t have! You’re joking, you’re lying!” He laughs, tries to believe it’s a joke, but he can’t get it out of his head that it isn’t.

“It’s not.”

It’s then that he lets out a sob. He trembles, pushes you away from him, looks you in the eye with a look full of betrayal. It’s then that he calls you names, which stated before aren’t what hurts you. It’s how he looks and what he says next that hurts the most, “I thought you loved me.”

That’s when the nightmare ends. You wake up with tears of your own, they’re hot and sting on your cheeks. You furiously wipe them away, but more keep coming.

You sob loudly, which wakes up John and Lucy. They’re the only ones you’ve trusted with your secret, Dazai. They comfort you the best they can but the most they can do is tell you it’s going to be okay or something along those lines. As much as you try to believe them, you can’t.

Dazai becomes a mere figure of your past. You think of him as unreachable, unattainable, as something you should scold yourself for thinking about.

If you could’ve taken him with you, you would’ve.

Learning that you will go back to Japan because of the leader’s obsession with a ‘tiger’ almost breaks you like your ability would.

You hadn’t thought about Dazai nightmares in the past year, but now you remember him again. You begin to regret leaving him, your heart aches again and your nightmares act up again. Everything gets worse when you arrive in Japan.

War breaks out between 3 organizations but the only thing you can think of is the Port Mafia. It’d been 6 years. Could he still remember you?

You don’t care who wins, you just want this whole thing to be over with. It upsets your ‘teammates’, but you don’t care. Once again, you think about leaving the organization, maybe live a normal life. That sort of life feels far-fetched right now and you know it’s something you’ll never have the chance to achieve. But still, you hope for it.

But then you see him again.

The second your eyes land on him you want to run. His eyes land on you and they must look the same as yours.

It hurts, but you have to persevere. “Hey, Lovecraft?” You glance at the man with the strange ability and appearance. “You want to go sleep, right?” You let out a mocking yawn of your own, giving the two in front of you your signature sickly smile.

“Yes.” Lovecraft replies, voice monotone and deep as always.

“Go get John and leave, get to sleep faster.” You nod in the direction you’d seen Chūya knock John towards. Your eyes stayed on the two in front of you. They both act as if they’d never seen you before, which you’re glad for. You don’t know if you could’ve handled seeing the same look Dazai would give you in your nightmares.

“But Francis and... you.” You’d like to think you’d gotten close to Lovecraft, but really he treated everybody the same because of his ‘contract’ with Francis.

“I’ll be fine. I know these guys’ weaknesses, anyway.” He doesn’t question how you do nor does he protest further and leaves immediately. “Quite the reunion, huh?”

“(y/n)..” Chūya growls. He glares at you, something you’d never seen 6 years ago as his senior executive. He never dared to interact with you. He knew he’d be replacing you as Dazai’s partner and knew about your relationship together. If anything, it was out of pity, and that you hated.

“Chūya.” You reply. “How’s the family, the mafia, the kids?” You mock. Chūya all but seethes, he looks like he’s ready to strike.

“(y/n),” Once Lovecraft is gone, Dazai gives you the look you dreaded to see. “H-How--” He doesn’t know what to say and neither do you. Your smile fades, turns into a frown. You don’t want to fight him but you also don’t want him to take on Lovecraft. As much as you liked the guy, he was a nightmare incarnate.

“Dazai.” Is all that you say. The vague response hurts you both.

“Chūya you might want to do that here.”

Chūya looks back at Dazai, shocked and taken aback. “You want me to do that? Dazai, I don’t think that’s needed and you know how shit that makes me feel.” It’s clear he doesn’t want to give into his corruption.

“You shouldn’t underestimate him.” Dazai speaks with experience, and it hurts you to know that he knows that.

“Don’t hurt him too much, we’re dating.”

“You’re still dating?!”

“Technically we never broke up!”

You laugh, staring at the limp body next to you. Chūya is deep asleep, or knocked out, you don’t know. You never really saw the aftermath of his corruption.

“That was a nice fight.” You remark, loud enough for Dazai to hear despite how weak you feel. Chūya had basically broken both your legs and injured you, but at least he hadn’t killed you or put you into a coma. The pain was unbearable for most people, but it was a simple background thought for you.

“It’s been…” Dazai starts.

“6 years.” You finish for him.

“I missed you.” You’re glad to hear that instead of the words from your nightmares, but you’re sure those words will eventually come.

“I did too.”

“You did?”

You sigh, nodding. “There were plenty of errands I had to run around and do for Francis. That rich old guy didn’t do anything himself. I didn’t think much of you, but I never forgot you. I had my own fair share of nightmares about you, they’re all the same.”

Dazai moves you to lean against the bark of a tree. You look into each other’s eyes, and you can tell that his are pleading. “Please stay.”

You ignore his remark, weakly reaching over to feel his coat. “New coat?”

“Yes.” Dazai grumbles, sitting down next to you cross legged. “Answer me.” He pleads again.

“You don’t want to know why I left, first?” Dazai shakes his head, taking your hand in his and squeezing it, prompting a pained groan from you. He quickly apologizes for it.

“I don’t know if I can.” You sigh, rubbing the back of his hand. You were quite touch starved, seeing as you couldn't really hold or touch anything properly. “If Francis wins I’d have to stay with him. If either of you win, I’ll most likely end up in prison.”

“Join me.”

You think back to the Guild. They were inviting and you thought them to be good, but just then did you think about how bad they really were. You’d known all along but you always refused to believe it. You wanted to be there just to escape the Mafia, you never wanted to be there because it was the guild.

“What was it… the Armed Detective Agency?” He nods. “How would that stop me from going to prison?”

“I don’t know.” Dazai admits with a huff. “Just.. please stay.”

“Okay.” You smile at him. Dazai remembers that smile, it’s burned into his memory and he takes note of how it hasn’t changed a bit. He’s missed it ever since you left. “Would they accept me, though?”

“They will, they will.” He says it as if he were determined, but he knows there’s a high chance they’ll refuse.

Dazai pulls you into a much deserved kiss. Long, gentle, sweet, and full of fireworks, it’s almost like your first. The only thing is it’s a little weak on your end, but he can’t blame you.

“Not going to mention sucide?”

“I haven’t seen you in 6 years, at least let me cherish this for another 2 months.”

#anonymousrequest #dazai osamu x reader #dazai osamu x male reader #dazai x reader #dazai x male reader #bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #bungou stray dogs x male reader #bsd x male reader #angst fic #bsd angst

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