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enamouredfae · 9 months

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little astro observations i've made based on my little chart collection and experience 🎀

honestly i've observed this only in myself but you have a natural pull to people who's sun is the same sign as your 5th house, mine is in pisces and my bf, my best friend and my cat are all pisces, not to mention that 90% of my crushes have been pisces as well.

there is something about pisces and bunnies, they will either love bunnies (have tattoos of them, make art about them, be their favourite animal), own or have owned a bunny or they look like one, (my bf is all of the above).

in synastry a north node over a person's mars may indicate the north node person taking the mars person's virginity.

in synastry a person's moon in your 9th house may indicate they understand/feel/empathize with emotions in a different way from you due to where they come from and how they were culturally socialized, i have this with my bf and he comes from a north american individualist country where your emotions are your responsibility and other's are theirs and i come from a post communist country where you are responsible for everyone's emotions, and ppl live for other people.

in vedic astrology i am a hasta moon, claire nakti made a video on hasta nakshatra and describes hasta natives as "fairy pretty" and i have a pair of dragonfly fairy wings tattooed on my back, plus ive been told (before my tattoo) that i give off fairy vibes.

saturn ruled 3rd house makes you have to spend a lot of time in public transportation, for example you might live far from where you need to go, for me it used to take me 1 hour at least to get to some places, sometimes i'd have to wait an hour just to then spend on hour on the bus. just overall imposes patience for transportation

a lot of astro observation posts say that an aquarius 4th house makes you feel like u dont belong in your family or that you're the black sheep of the family, but i dont find that accurate at all, i feel like it makes the native the one to challenge family values, they may be the one to make their family change for humanitarian reasons

idk if this is a real technique already used by astrologers but i have a wholesign MC theory. in wholesign the midheaven can fall in the 9th/10th or 11th house. my theory is that wherever it falls is the way you get ahead in life, the way through which u become publicly known or get your career. If it falls in the 9th your career is owed to ur studies/travel, 10th your hard work/experience/reputation, 11th your connections/social media/friends.

i think i have the most literal astrological placements being passed down from your parents example. obviously placements dont always get passed down, my sister has none of their placements, but perhaps being the first child may have contributed to this since the first child is when parents still have their personality not yet influenced by parenthood. so my moon and my sun, which we know symbolize the parents amongst other things, are at the same degree and they sextile eachother exactly, which I think is an indicator that my parents are very harmonious together; they are still together and in love even now. furthermore, my moon and sun are the same signs of my parents' stelliums, i have a libra moon and my mom has a libra stellium, and my sun is in leo and my dad has a leo stellium.

sibling's ceres in your first is feeling like a parent to them, i constantly tell my sister she's my daughter, we even have an inside joke that i gave birth to her at 5, and my ceres is in her fourth, the house of motherhood so she definitely sees me as a parental figure.

me and my bf have eachother's jupiter in our 7th houses, besides being in a serious committed relationship, we want to start a business together. so i feel this is a great indicator for great partnership in both regards.

i feel like this is also a technique but i haven't really heard much about it, generational planets affect us through societal conditions/problems whereas personal planets affect us through personal problems. for example: let's go with two malefics, i have pluto in the first house which i feel would be very different from having let's say mars in the first house. the first house is amongst many things our appearance which i am insecure about. i have never in my life been told i am ugly, i am actually constantly told i am beautiful, and yet it does not click. it isn't through personal experiences that i have problems with my appearance but through consumption of society ideals. this is of course an oversimplification but you get what i mean.

chiron retrograde in natal changes our perception on trauma. me and my bf have the same chiron, his is retrograde while mine is not. he constantly says he is not traumatized, whereas i can tell i am. he 100% has traumas, the thing is that it's like he's left them behind? he just says it happened a long time ago so it's done. my observation is that retrogrades in your natal may make u leave things in the past or have a "it happened a long time ago it doesn't matter" attitude towards trauma. the thing is he acts like a non-traumatized person which is crazy to me.

i have a skin condition called dermatographia, also overall very dry itchy acne prone skin, i also have scars. here are a few placements that i have that i feel may be an indicator for skin conditions: mars ruled first house (traditional rulership) mars is inflamation and scarring, saturn in seventh saturn is dry and some people consider that libra(7th house) rules the skin, saturn opposite ascendant, saturn square venus i see venus as clear skin due to its aesthetical perfection.

saturn in 1st, especially conjunct ascendant indicates identity issues. borrowing elements of identity from people you admire, not feeling like you identify with the gender assigned at birth, not identifying with your birth name, etc.

having a libra 12th house can indicate traumatic female friendship. the 12th house is the house of hidden enemies, so you perceive these people as your friends, sometimes even best friends, so when they betray you it is very jarring and traumatic. having female friends that are jealous of you, female friends that pretend to like you, female friends that talk shit about you and even sometimes lie about u, friends that purposefully hide information from you, that want what you have, sometimes sabotaging what you have or trying to make u lose the thing they want, etc. this is a very difficult placement, because you love these people so much that you would've given up things, changed things or shared things with them if only they were honest with you. in the best of cases the friendship is real and full of love but you grow apart, and this is also painful because you can't control it.

venus square ascendant is people telling you they love you and you not believing them. just overall hardships around love and seeing yourself as loveable. double points when it also squares saturn making u think that if u are loved it's hard work or that people had to convince themselves to, that you're hard to love.

people with venus conjunct mars in first are stunning and have an androgynous vibe to them. sometimes this is visual, strong muscular body with graceful posture, but it can reflect in their personality, just strength imbued with vulnerability, people that surprise you, that are balanced.

taurus 6th house can indicate finding romantic partners in the workplace.

having a stellium in the 4th and no planets in the 10th, can indicate a strong connection to your mom and a disconnect from your dad, especially when the sun is in the opposite sign of your tenth house(in your 4th) feeling like your dad is not the way he should be.

🎀

please let me know what you think, im very curious how they hold up in other people's charts, critiques are welcome and invited.

#astrology observations #astrology #enamoured fae #astro tumblr #astro #astro notes #astro community #horoscope #birth chart

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 7 months

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WIBTA if I told my sister she wasn't entitled to everything just because she's pregnant?

I (19F) have a younger sister, E, who just turned 18. She got emancipated when she was 16, and moved out to go and live with her boyfriend (my age). E is currently 8 months pregnant. She shared with me, the day she found out, that her baby 100% does NOT belong to her boyfriend of 3 years. This is important because he continues to stay with her, much to his parents' discontent. She lived with him for about 6 months of her pregnancy, but absolutely trashed their house every day, refused to work, and refused to do anything around the house other than smoke weed in their bedroom, so they called our mom, and forced her to come and pick E up.

We let E stay at our house after that. It's important to note that we live in a 4 bedroom, where our youngest sibling still lives in our parents bedroom, and one of our other younger siblings had to give up their room for her to stay in. She got a job in our small town (~3000 people), and started to spread rumors at work about how terrible we were, how we were forcing her to work while pregnant, and taking all of her paycheck. None of which was happening. Our parents told E that she could either get a job and pay for some of the groceries, or she could give us her food stamps payments, which she usually sells for weed, as there are 4 other kids under the age of 18 in the house that they have to provide for. E later got fired for smoking weed in the bathroom of the restaurant where she worked. When we brought up how she'd need to give us that months food stamps for us to let her stay, because she got fired, she brought me into the argument. She said that since I was over 18, I should have to work as well to earn my spot in the house, when in reality, most of what I do all day is clean up after and take care of our younger siblings. My mom argued back on my behalf, saying that since I'm disabled, and my disability checks, as well as child support payments from my biological father, go to living expenses, I shouldn't be suddenly forced to move out when I do my share of work around the house. E blew up on our mom for defending me, citing her own history of mental health issues and her pregnancy, and left.

A few weeks ago, she came back, asking for a room while she waited for her new apartment to clear, as her boyfriend's parents had once again kicked her out. Our parents agreed, on the grounds that she stay in the trailer we have on the property, as opposed to taking over our younger sibling's room again, because she completely trashed it last time and refused to clean or fix anything she broke. She agreed.

Here's where I may be the asshole. Every time she's in the house proper, she badgers me to make her food, when I am clearly busy cleaning or taking care of one of our younger siblings. She takes over the chair that our mom has to sit in for her back issues, citing her pregnancy as to why she needs the extra back support. She uses our younger sister's expensive bath products, which she had to get a babysitting job to pay for herself, without asking, and didn't stop when asked, despite having her own bath products. She constantly complains about how I never do anything, despite the fact that while she says that, I'm actively cleaning up after her the same amount I am a literal four year old, while she never even lifts a finger to help out, or even make her own food. She does not pay for food, or pay any sort of rent at all, as she's only supposed to be here for a few more weeks. The absolute last straw for me was when I, a chronically ill person who has to have a very specific diet and meal replacement shakes, came out of my room to see her eating from a tupperware container literally labeled with my name, and drinking one of my meal replacement shakes.

Would I be the asshole if I told her that just because she's pregnant, that doesn't mean she's entitled to all of our things? I want to tell her that she needs to start making her own food, and cleaning up after herself, instead of forcing me to do it. I want to tell her that, just because I'm her older sister, that doesn't mean that I still have to take care of her like our 4 and 7 year old ones. That she doesn't need to keep taking from things specifically bought by/for another person in the house, without offering to pay for it or compensate?

WIBTA?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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heavyhitterheaux · 2 years

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Cold Water

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: best friends should always be honest with each other

Synopsis: You and your best friend are at odds when you learn that he kept his new girlfriend a secret from you on purpose

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Requested by: @fallon-carrington123 (I incorporated the first part of your request. Part 2 is where I’ll add the rest!)

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Read My Superstar first

It had been maybe a week or so since you learned the news of Urban having a girlfriend for two months over an instagram post. Safe to say that you were hurt because he didn’t tell you and it didn’t seem as if he was going to mention it until he got caught.

You and Urban have been close since the time the two of you were 14 when you both met and you simply shared everything with him. Even if it had to do with your beloved husband.

You know had a three week break from tour and you were back at home with Jack and Urban. However, the tension in the house was at an all time high because you had been giving Urban the silent treatment. The rest of PG were also there and you were all sitting around having a movie marathon and eating some homemade pizza that you had made for them.

PG didn’t want to say anything regarding you and Urban and figured that the two of you would work it out yourselves.

You two literally couldn’t live without the other so they knew you would make up soon.

You got up to go into the kitchen to refill your lemonade when Urban walked in to confront you.

He was over you ignoring him and wanted to fix this or at least attempt to.

“This shit stops right now. We need to talk about this.” You heard him say from behind you as you were finishing pouring the lemonade in your cup. You rolled your eyes before turning around to look at him.

“You lied to me! We have been friends for ten years! I have never lied to you about anything or kept something from you because guess what? You’re my best friend and best friends don’t do that!”

“You want to know why I didn’t tell you? Honestly?”

“I’m all ears, Wyatt. The fact that you told the rest of them before me and they met her? You even told Neelam before me! Like what the actual fuck?”

“BECAUSE YOU HAVE LITERALLY RUINED EVERY SINGLE RELATIONSHIP THAT I’VE BEEN IN!”

“What?!? No, I haven't Urban! That is complete bullshit!”

“You sure about that? Let me pull the receipts.”

“Is it my fault that no one that you’ve dated has been good enough for you!? My best friend deserves the best!”

“How can I find that if you keep running them off?!”

“Urban, Jessica was rude as hell every time we went out and didn’t give two shits about her attitude. The way she would speak to people was insane.”

“Damn, sounds like you’re talking about yourself. I’m going to need for you to stop being a hypocrite.”

“Urb! I am not rude! I never have been!”

“But your attitude could use some work! You never see the fault in what you do! EVER!”

“THAT IS NOT TRUE! What about Reina?! She dated you only to become closer to Jack and I don’t know why that was her goal simply because he’s married to me! She wasn’t thinking about you! She did not have your best interest!”

“But you didn’t have to fight her either! Let’s not forget the girls you ran off because of how you act and the fact that they didn’t get your approval! It’s like they see how you are and run for the hills!”

“You’re my best friend and I am always going to protect you!”

“You can do that without constantly being on my ass all the time, Y/N! Like damn let me breathe! Last time I checked I was a grown ass man who could take care of himself!”

“But….”

And that’s when the tears started to fall.

Meanwhile PG was standing to the side of the doorway out of both of your line of vision listening to the heated exchange happening between you and Urban.

“Uhh, Jack? Maybe you should intervene.” 2fo said while looking over at him.

“Absolutely not. They need to work this out themselves. I can’t always run and save the day every time she has a disagreement with someone. She’s an adult. Now if anything disrespectful was said that’s a different story.”

“But, Urb is kinda making some valid points. She is very protective of all of us but especially him.” Shloob confessed with car keys in hand just in case he had to make a quick exit.

“True, like sometimes I don’t say certain things around her because I don’t know how she’s going to react.”

“We all know that she doesn’t tolerate bullshit and only wants the best for us.”

“Yeah, but like Urb said she has to let us breathe and not be on our backs all the time.”

“Urban! Why can’t you see how much I care about you?!”

“I do and I’m going to need for you to stop crying because you are always playing the victim and I’m tired of it. Any time someone says something you don’t like or they’re telling you about yourself you get upset and cry. Grow the fuck up. Don’t you think I eventually want what you and Jack have? How am I supposed to do that if you literally run off every girl that I show interest in?”

All you did was simply look at him speechless with tears rolling down your face.

Your intentions were always pure when it came to Urban or anybody in PG who had gotten a girlfriend. You wanted for them to be on the same level as them and not settle for less.

Your feelings were hurt to think that Urban believed that you would intentionally do that to him.

All you wanted was to see your best friend happy.

“Then I’m sorry for caring and loving my best friend and wanting for him to have what he deserves. You won’t have to worry about me doing that anymore.”

“Wait, Y/N….”

Urban tried to catch your hand as you walked past him but you quickly snatched away from him. PG scrambled to go back to their places on the couches in the living room but you knew that they had been listening.

Jack saw your face full of tears and was now kind of annoyed with Urban for making you cry even if he had been right.

“Baby…”

“I.. just need a minute.”

You went upstairs and simply laid down and cried at what just happened.

The two of you had never argued or gotten into disagreements the entire ten years that you had been friends.

This hurt and it was never your intention to keep Urban from finding someone to be with.

But if he felt that you weren't doing any good by hovering over him, consider it done.

You just wanted to make sure that it was someone who wanted Urban for him and not anything else.

Why couldn’t he understand that?

It had been about another week or so since the huge blow up between you and Urban and it was safe to say that the silent treatment was continuing.

Well you couldn’t exactly call it that seeing as if he asked you something, you did answer him but simply left it at that.

To avoid all of this Urban had been spending more time with Yasmin who you still had yet to meet.

You figured it would happen eventually, but you weren't in any rush since he told you that you had ruined every relationship that he had been in previously so you continued to keep your distance.

It was around 11 am when PG decided that they wanted to go play laser tag and wanted for you to join them.

“Y/N, I need you on my team because you're little and you can hide and do sneak attacks.” Ace said but you kept a neutral face.

“No, I’m already doing something.”

“Wait, what? You’ve been dodging us all week! Come with us!”

"If I wasn't already doing something, I would."

"Well if we get dinner later are you coming?"

You simply shrugged.

"If I get finished maybe but I don't know." You honestly answered before going back upstairs and getting ready to meet Megan in the studio.

You had written a song for her to put on her new album and wanted to record it today in the hopes of getting your mind off everything else.

Once you were out of earshot everyone turned towards Urban.

"Will you two make up already!? And you can tell she's upset!"

"I tried to explain why I did it but of course she doesn't see anything wrong in what she did."

"Urb, you know how she is. You more so than anyone else besides Jack."

"Just because I know how she is doesn't make it right. She's upset because I told her the truth and I also kind of told her to back off a little bit and stop hovering."

"Well damn. That's why she hasn't wanted to go out with us."

"I meant to stop hovering around me when it came to relationships, not hanging out with us in general."

You knew it would be awkward with both you and Urban there and you didn't want to add more fuel to the fire.

"Jack, fix this! I miss her cooking for all of us. Now she's all sad and shit and making us eat take out. I swear that I can’t eat another egg roll."

"It's not my problem to fix. It's between them. Urb does the same thing when me and her have disagreements. He remains neutral and that’s what I’m doing."

"Now you know how stubborn your wife is, she is not going to apologize first."

"I think that the both of you need to apologize. You for keeping Yasmin from her and she does too for running the girlfriends off in the past even if her intentions behind it were good.." Jack said being completely honest.

"But why am I apologizing if I'm not sorry? I guarantee that if I would have told her about Yasmin that we wouldn’t still be together because of how she is."

"Urb, just do it so we can get fed! We're about to turn to skin and bones around here!"

"Shloob, you're just scared that she'll pop off."

"Well she has been quiet all week. Maybe she's plotting something. First Lady is never quiet. Jack, just make sure you give the eulogy at Urb's funeral."

Jack took the steps two at a time to go and check on you. It definitely made him feel some type of way seeing his wife so sad, so he was trying to do his best to take your mind off of it. But, he knew the two of you couldn’t live without each other even if both of you were acting like dumbasses and not trying to fix the issue.

He found you sitting on the bed and scrolling through your phone with your shoes near you assuming that you were getting ready to leave.

"Babe?"

"Yes?"

"Now you know I'm staying neutral because the last thing I want to do is come between you two and pick sides but the two of you really need to fix this."

"I'm doing what he asked me to do. So I'm keeping my distance."

"That's not what he meant and you know it." Jack replied while coming to sit down next to you and pull you onto his lap.

"Well that's what it sounded like to me. Because apparently I ruin everything and run people off."

"Baby girl. I get that you're in your feelings because he kept it from you. However, he has a point as to why."

"Not you too." You muttered while rolling your eyes and crossing your arms.

"I wouldn't be a good husband if I wasn't honest with my wife."

"I just… from what I saw from my perspective, none of them had his best interest and obviously in my mind I don't think anyone is good enough for my best friend. What's wrong with wanting to protect him from getting his heart broken?"

"Nothing at all but sometimes people need to learn on their own. You have to allow him to make mistakes. I feel like we're talking about our kid in a way." Jack said before laughing and it made you form a small smile on your face.

“That’s why I’m keeping my distance.”

“No, you need to find a good balance. This is such a thing as caring too much and you kind of take it overboard when it comes to Urban.”

“I just…. It really hurt what he said.”

“But there wasn’t any ill intent behind it, baby girl. Urban is hurt too. Don’t you think he wanted you to be the first person he told about Yasmin?”

“I thought he would do that regardless but, I… I don’t really want to talk about this anymore.”

“Baby, just think about it from his point of view, okay?”

“I’ll try.”

“Now where are you off to? You need to stop avoiding us.”

“I’m not avoiding anybody. I’m about to go spend time with Meg in the studio. I wrote something for her and we want to record it.”

“Fine, but this weekend you’re spending time with us too. I invited Yasmin over to formally meet you.”

“No thanks, I’m busy.”

“Baby! Stop doing that. Will you at least try for Urban?”

“Nope.”

“Okay, fine. Try for me.”

“Maybe.”

“You didn’t say no so I’ll take it.”

You and Megan had just finished recording Budget and the two of you were just sitting around talking when the topic of Urban and Yasmin was brought up.

“Have you met her yet?”

“Nope and apparently I am this weekend because that husband of mine invited her over. I just can’t believe he literally lied to my face.”

“Well…. You kind of take it to the extreme when it comes to PG.”

“How so?”

“You are extremely protective and territorial over them. I know that they say no one gets to the first lady except through them but no one gets to the members of PG without going through the first lady. It goes both ways.”

“They’re my friends! I obviously want to protect them as much as I can!”

“Okay, you can do that without being a helicopter mom. Because that is definitely you.”

“I am not!”

“Listen to me for a second. I have heard a few of them say that certain things they don’t say in front of you because they don’t know how you’re going to react and they do keep things from you to not cause tension.”

“That makes me feel like I’m a horrible person. I want them to always be able to come to me about things and not have to hide.”

“You aren’t. You just have to allow yourself to have an open mind when it comes to things. I’m sure that they want to share a lot of things with you but they don’t because of your uhh… track record.”

“The only time I fight is if I have a good reason.”

“And I wholeheartedly believe you! However, there’s a time and place for everything so come whenever you meet her, go in there with an open mind and talk to Urban. Because even though you’re hurting, he probably is too.”

“Jack said the same thing.”

“It’ll all work out in the end, I promise. It’ll be like this entire thing never even happened.”

The weekend was now finally here and as promised for Jack and for Jack only you were playing host to Yasmin.

Everyone was sitting around the firepit in the backyard holding simple conversations and getting to know her while you had simply remained quiet.

You had a feeling that anything you said was going to piss Urban off so instead of causing tension, you decided that remaining quiet was the best option.

There you were sitting on Jack’s lap and sipping on your red wine when you suddenly heard Yasmin call out to you.

“Hmm?”

“That pasta you made was really good. How’d you learn to cook so well? Did your mom or someone else teach you?”

“My mom did.” You kept your answer simple and noticed how Urban had rolled his eyes at your response, but you ignored it.

“Is there any dish that’s your favorite to make? Or only make on special occasions?”

“I don’t really have one. Anything they ask for, I make it.”

“Yasmin, wait until you try her mini strawberry cheesecakes or her sweet potato pies. We all have a running joke that she puts crack in it to keep us wanting more.” Shloob said while everyone laughed.

“I’m definitely looking forward to it.”

“I have a question for you, too.”

“Oh shit, it’s happening.” Quiiso whispered under his breath and everyone kind of looked on with wide eyes.

“Sure, go ahead.”

“What exactly is your job? No one has mentioned it seeing as I didn’t even know you existed until three weeks ago.”

“Oh, I’m a makeup artist. Still fairly new to the industry but I think the favorite person I’ve done work on is Dua Lipa. I know that the two of you are pretty close.”

“A little too close in my opinion.” Jack whispered in your ear, making you laugh.

“Hmm, how’d you meet Urban?”

“We actually ran into each other backstage at the VMA’s and then it just went from there.”

“What are your intentions? Is he your first boyfriend or no?”

“Y/N….” Urban said in a warning tone and you simply looked at him.

“Urb, you wanted me to get to know her right? And wanted for me to not ruin this seeing as you told me that I ruin every single relationship that you’ve been in so I’m doing my best.”

“Wait, what?” Yasmin curiously asked while looking between all of you and you heard Jack sigh from behind you.

“You can do your best without interrogating her, just like you did all the other ones before.” Urban replied while raising his voice.

“I’ve barely said anything to her all night! How am I supposed to get to know her if I don’t ask questions?”

“I really don’t mind answering them…” Yasmin said attempting to try and keep the peace since you and Urban were shooting daggers at each other.

“Should have known your ass was going to do this.”

“I didn’t even do anything!”

“Yet!”

“Fine, Urban, if you are so bothered by me wanting the best for you then I don’t know why we’re still friends.”

“Now wait one got damn minute. Yall are not throwing away ten years of friendship over this. It is not that serious. Can the two of you just apologize and move on?” 2fo piped up and suddenly looked nervous.

“I’m not apologizing for something that I’m not sorry for.”

Damn that stung.

“Well he told me I ruin everything concerning his relationships and that I’m a hypocrite because I mentioned one of those girlfriends having an attitude and he said mine could use some work.”

“Uhhh… well…”

“SHLOOB!”

“I mean…. That wasn’t totally a lie.”

“Are we seriously doing this right now? So everyone can list my faults but yall are perfect?”

“No one even said that and that’s what your problem is! You never listen when someone is trying to explain something to you and act like the victim!” Urban fired back at you and you could now tell that Yasmin was extremely uncomfortable.

“Will you two calm down?!” Jack exclaimed as his two best friends were going at it. As much as he didn’t want to intervene, this was getting out of hand.

“I’m not acting like a victim!

“Umm right now you kind of are.” Ace confessed and you just stared at all of them in disbelief.

“We’re your friends and we are supposed to be honest with you, no matter if it hurts. It’s better we tell you than to lie.”

“Oh, but you all did lie. In ten years, I have kept nothing from any of you and this was really a slap in my face but since I always act like the victim, I won’t say anymore about it. Yasmin, you seem really nice and I wish you and Urban the best. I have a headache so good night.”

Jack tried to pull you back as you attempted to stand up, but he wasn’t quick enough.

You made your way back into the house as it was now silent in the backyard.

“Well consider that our last meal from her probably until 2025. If she wasn’t acting distant before, she damn sure will be distant now.” Nemo said, breaking the silence.

“Jack, is this how it feels when she’s mad at you? Because I don’t really like this.” 2fo confessed.

“Somehow this feels worse.”

Just then Jack eyed Urban who was simply running a hand through his curls while Yasmin was sitting there awkwardly.

“All this shit could have been avoided if you would have told her.”

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@miniaturehideoutmentality

@hoya122

@nattinatalia

@jackslover12

#jack harlow #jack harlow x black reader #jack harlow x reader #jack harlow angst #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow fic #jack harlow fanfic #urban wyatt #urban wyatt x black reader #urban wyatt x reader #urban wyatt angst #urban wyatt concept #urban wyatt fic #urban wyatt fanfic

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fanfic-lover-girl · 9 months

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Draco Malfoy is not the only problem with Dramione

Look, am I the only one who hates Dramione not because of Draco but HERMIONE?

Dramione antis (often Draco antis I notice) usually paint Draco as the toxic person in this ship undeserving of Queen Hermione. How he's a cowardly, dumb ferret and Hermione deserves a real man.

You know what Hermione deserves? A consuming career and a house full of cats! Ron can have her! I feel like I am dissing myself when I diss Hermione since I see a lot of my academic self in her but who the hell sees Hermione as wife or mother material??

No one deserves to be in a relationship with someone who hates them. Hermione is no exception. Hermione does not deserve to be in a relationship with a guy who stands by while she is being tortured or hurls slurs in her face. Or thinks she is worth less than trash.

But based on canon, we know who is more likely to attack their partner and commit domestic abuse. It ain't Draco. Like...do you not see how this girl treats Ron?! The guy she's supposed to like?! While Draco has never laid a hand on her, even when this girl slapped/punched him for no justifiable reason. Him making fun of Hagrid is not justifiable. Slap him when he calls you a mudblood and then we can talk Hermione.

Draco does anything to upset her and this vindictive shrew would probably turn him into a bug and squash him. Or maybe poison him. Or turn him into a bouncing ferret for nostalgia (I read a Dramione fic where Hermione did this - that definitely killed my recent short-lived Dramione reading spree). Magic provides a myriad of possibilities :).

At least with Draco, we don't really see him mistreating his (female) friends. None of his actions towards Hermione is irredeemable. After thorough redemption and maturity, he would theoretically treat Hermione well. His parents may be hostile but he can always just give them the finger the way he did for dear Astoria. Hermione on the other hand is shown to be constantly abusive to Ron yet she's one of the heroes of the story, hardly ever called out for her appalling actions. People need to wake up from their Draco hate and recognize Hermione's flaws as well in this ship. It's more than just her not forgiving him. She would literally hurt him. Like she already hurt Ron! And her own parents!

My mother told me that if your loved one hits you once, you need to leave. Immediately. Ron should have dropped Hermione as a potential love interest the second she attacked him. Because she will do it again when she gets angry.

So yeah, Ron can keep her. Poor Ron. Hermione is hardly a catch. For anyone calling me a sexist, that kind of attitude is not cute in a dude either.

Draco can do better than her. But literally, almost anyone is better than Hermione (I'll be over here enjoying my Druna content).

Actually, the only guy who probably deserves Hermione is Harry Potter himself. She actually seems to be sweeter to him and respects him more than Ron lol. Those two can be vindictive, inconsiderate psychos together while Ron finds better friends who don't see him as a dumb loser. Oh, and Ginny can find a guy who won't dump her the second she cries (like that "crybaby" Cho) or excludes her. Harmione is practically a match made in hell.

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makethosenarratorsfight · 1 year

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UNRELIABLE NARRATORS; SIDE C

Dr. John Watson Propaganda:

He literally admits that he changes his stories. "One day the true stories may be told"? Do I need to say more?

Gideon Nav Propaganda:

(Spoilers for Ht9) She just. Fully ignores most of the magic plot happening around her in the first boom to be a dyke. In the second book it’s even less reliable and it’s fully fucking insane. It’s first person but she’s telling YOU (harrow) what is happening and it’s impossible to decipher. The appearance and personality of every character is fully morphed by Gideon’s mean dykishness.

MASSIVE spoilers. Like even mentioning that this is a thing is a huge fucking spoiler. I normally don’t care about spoilers that much but I legitimately feel awful for anyone with even a passing interest in reading these books who has this spoiled for them. Anyway. Yeah turns out the second-person narration is actually a first-person narration by the dead girl living in Harrow’s head whose death traumatized Harrow (and the entire fandom) so badly that she literally lobotomized herself to forget it and give Gideon a chance at not having her soul digested.

constantly adds her own commentary, does not pay attention to the interesting moving parts of the plot bc she's too busy looking at pretty girls, cannot be trusted to read her own intentions correctly never mind anyone else's. I love her dearly

she just doesn’t notice or doesn’t give a shit about a ton of plot-essential information. Harrow and Palamedes are talking about a necromantic theorem that would blow open the entire story if we could hear them? You can instantly feel Gideon’s eyes glaze over and her mind wander to the nearest available hot girl, and our attention goes with her. It’s handled so smoothly that you might not even notice it happening until a second or third read.

More Propaganda under cut!

Gideon Nav is all but useless as a narrator, and we love her for it. So first of all, she knows absolutely nothing. She grew up under a rock. Almost literally. When the plot is happening near her, she almost never tells us about it. Politics, history, and the magic system are boring. Let her know when there's something she can FIGHT. She also has very selective emphasis and focus that can change a scene completely without ever actually lying. She can tell the same story—to us, in her third-person narration as a factual recounting—and in one version the incident will be a schoolyard scuffle, while a later telling will reveal it to have been a near-homicide. She'll confidently interpret other character's motivations and emotions, only to later be proven wrong. But the thing that makes her REALLY unreliable? She lies to HERSELF constantly. She will tell us in her narration that she doesn't give a shit where someone disappeared to, and then spend the whole day searching for them. She'll say she hates someone, when. Well....

okay so i am actually going to do one segment about her own book and one about harrow’s so many apologies and also many spoilers ahead okay? okay so in gideon the ninth it’s a well known thing that she’s an unreliable narrator on two fronts: she lies to herself and therefore us about how she’s feeling and what she’s thinking, and also she isn’t paying attention to the plot at all. the only things she pays any attention to are hot girls, swords, and hot girls with swords. at one point she watches their only way out be sealed off and is so bored about it that she goes to sleep watching it happen, taking absolutely no note of “oh hey they’re trapping us here”. later someone asks IN FRONT OF HER “hey where did all our shuttles go” and shes like “😌😌😌😌😌😌😌😌😌” and still does not make the connection. babygirl. but THEN!!!!! in HARROW the ninth (MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD) gideon is the narrator the ENTIRE TIME (except for the revised canaan house parts) and not only does she editorialize, she also straight up lies about events and motivations! partially justified by her being inside harrow’s head, but like. babygirl. beloved. the interjections of “holy fuck” and “pommel” and othersuch things is so important to my mental health and wellbeing. thank you. thank you for lying to us so so much.

#gideon nav #gideon the ninth #the locked tomb #dr john watson #john watson #watson #sherlock holmes #unreliable narrator battle #unreliable narrators #polls #side c

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illandtired · 12 days

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about me<3 (tw)

Hello, I’m 17 and I’m gonna try to take my life again on my 18th birthday.

(Sorry, this jumps around a lot.)

(And it’s long….)

Also heavy topics, literally almost every trigger warning in the book.

This blog is gonna literally be my diary. I’ve attempted to make me life multiple times in the past for multiple different reasons.

I’m seventeen and I currently live alone in my mother’s house, she lives with her boyfriend. I had my biological dad who left before I was born and two step fathers. The only one I “care” about is my most recent. He entered my life when I was 6 and since then I tried telling my mother about him but for some reason it took until I was 16 for her to divorce him. He abused me severely. When I told him I was suicidal the first time he said he was gonna go get his gun then proceeded to make me beg for my life. I was I believe 12 or 13, a lot of it’s a blur like most of my life.

I don’t want to go too much into my past and make this too long, I started smoking weed in 8th grade. By 9th I was doing lines of random shit I got from kids at school off the bathroom toilets. I have touched most stuff besides heroin. The one drug I promised my mother I would stay away from. Currently I am still hooked on opioids, SSRIs, and I smoke weed/thc carts every day.

I was 6 when I was diagnosed with adhd, severe anxiety and depression. I haven’t seen a doctor since. My mother swears she’s trying to get me in but she always complains about how much my meds cost. She knows my worries about my mental state and I swear it’s impossible to get the help I need.

I’ve always been a paranoid person but it’s getting worse by the day. I’m genuinely too scared to take the trash out because I feel 800 eyes on me. I feel like there’s invisible people constantly around me judging my every move. I don’t feel real some times, and not that life is a simulation shit, I genuinely don’t feel like I’m in my body.

I started self harming in 3rd grade. It started as me being a wrist and head banger but by 5th grade I had started using thumb tacks and scratching myself. I went to my step father and he told me they weren’t Deep enough and I was just looking for attention. By 6th grade I was actually cutting, but only to where I barely saw the blood. By 8th it got to the point where I needed to see the blood run. But I’ve managed to get back to only getting it to bead up, occasionally running. I was clean for quite a few months but the smallest, SMALEST thing can set me back so much.

I’ve struggled my entire life with starving myself, binge eating, then starving myself. I’ve been an unhealthy weight a lot of my life. I’m around 240lbs now, my eating disorder is mainly starving now. My “Binges” are now small.

I have never been able to make a phone call to someone besides friends. Even family calls are hard a lot. I can barely order food at a restaurant, fancy or McDonald’s.

I’ve made money in my life from stealing, I’ve been a kleptomaniac for as long as I can remember. But I also made money doing bakery stuff for my mother, doing mechanical stuff, and babysitting. My only “legal” job was working at McDonald’s. I got fired a year after starting because we had a new manager who fired me over homophobic reasons. I hated going to work. I loved the work itself, but I hated having to be around anyone.

I’ve always been called lazy. And I feel like it’s true, I can barely find the motivation to get up to take a piss most days. I had such a hard time with organization and cleanliness as a kid so I always had a messy room, unless it was right after one of the days I got my stuff thrown away.

I never payed attention in school yet I somehow got straight As until i genuinely didn’t care anymore. I dropped out 10th grade on my 16th birthday. School was so much worse for my mental health. I was self harming almost every day, lying to myself about who I am to fit in.

I actually love learning, I wanted to get into nursing school but I know I’ll never get clean enough. I even study biology, trig, physics, crime scene investigation, all sorts of stuff. I have notebooks and notebooks that I’ve filled with information I’ll never use.

I was 10 when I got my first boyfriend. He was 18, a relationship on discord. It lasted a couple years at least. I was sexually assaulted multiple times growing up and I don’t wanna go into more detail in this post. But due to my sexual trauma i became very hyper sexual very young. I still am to this day, I sell pictures to creepy men online because I know I won’t be able to get any other job. But at the same time it’s basically been implemented in my brain I’m good for sex and nothing more. I feel so utterly disgusted with myself after every sexual experience in my life from sex to just sending nudes.

I grew up a chubby girl with big tits. It was 6th grade i started having boys desperate to touch them. I had Ds by then. I’m a F-G now (depends on the bra). My own step father and his sons who were much older than me started sexualizing me when I was about 13. One of my step brother was creepy since he entered my life.

I’ve had so many important parts of my life taken from me. My Virginity with a man was raped away when I was 14 on Christmas. My self worth was barely existent but it was gone completely by 9th grade. My first “good boyfriend” was when I was 15, he was 18. He filmed us one night after I asked him not to multiple times, but the next day a video of me having my brains fucked out was all over my school. It was a smaller school, but even some of the female teachers sided with him because he was the “king” of the school. I missed my middle school graduation which doesn’t seem like much to most people, but I knew I was going to drop out and never have a high school graduation. I was even selected to write a speech and go up and speak at the podium but due to anxiety from both situations I missed the whole thing entirely because I tried to kill myself that night.

Most of my attempts have been overdose attempts, and that’s for a reason. I couldn’t imagine my mother finding me and my brains splattered on the wall. But out of everything, no it’s not my mother that’s kept me alive. It’s been my best friend. I live in the states and he lives in Scotland. We’ve been friends for years, we met through my ex and were completely like the opposite of each other but we care about each other. And unfortunately I don’t think I’ll be able to meet him. We were going to meet when I turn eighteen because he’ll be turning 21 and can legally drink here, I can legally drink there.

I care about nothing more than him and it pains me that I know he will be disappointed when he realizes I gave up. I don’t plan on telling him anything.. we have a thing where if he’s gone for a month he’s on a mental health break, but two months he’s dead and I have his permission to kill myself. I’m going to tell him he has to wait a year for me because I might be in the mental hospital.

Back to simple things I can’t do, I would rather claw my own eyes out than be alone with a man in a room. But my best friend is the one exception. I haven’t gone on a date since new years. As soon as we got to his house, it wasn’t even 5 minutes before he had a gun pressed in my side.

Yet at the same time I feel like my only purpose is to make men happy in any way I can. Even if it makes me uncomfortable and I don’t want to do it. Because that’s all I’ve ever been good at and praised for.

There was about a week in my life and it was somewhat recent. I told myself I wasn’t going to attempt again because no matter what life won’t suck that bad. Being homeless was the happiest time of my life, sure I can be on the street and cold, no money, but I no longer have responsibilities and I get to walk which I love doing. I used to sneak out at night and go on long ass walks normally from 10pm to 3-5am.

More things about substances, once again I’m sorry for jumping around. I started smoking cigarettes in 6th grade, provided by my step father and girlfriend. I started drinking in 8th grade but now it takes half a bottle of tequila for me to be at a happy level of drunk. Or 4 bottles of cheap wine, or an entire bottle of rum. Anyways I feel like I’m rambling on and on so I’m gonna try to wrap this up.

What’s the main reason I want to kill myself? Because I know I will never be able to live a normal life. But my one goal as a kid was to make it to 18.

#tw 3d vent #3dtumblr #3d #3d diet #3d f4st #3d not sheeran #tw ed but not sheeran #vent post #personal vent #vent blog #cw vent #@na vent #vent

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theg-unit · 1 year

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141 (and friends) professional and personal Specialty Headcannons.

also I dipped for a hot minute but I spent that time reading twitter thread fics like the internet goblin I am and falling into the multi shipper hole that is PriceNik and poly141 so here are more Headcannons about our favs.

(also no I won't write Konig Headcannons, I don't like him. pls stop asking)

Areas of interest: academic and personal.

-soap is good at chemistry and chemical equations. the man has the periodic table tattooed on the back of his eyelids and nothing will stop him from making an IED out of literally the most random shit. also knows a concerning amount about atomic physics. but he also has a passion for all poetry and writes little sonnets in his sketchbook for his partners.

-Price is really good at languages. he's a certified multilingual and is constantly learning. his favourite part is learning niche regional dialects. he is fluent in conversation in all major languages and can speak conversationally in at least 30 others. he also really enjoys horticulture. he can name 50 different grasses according to Laswell.

- Ghost specialises in trigonometry. he can do it mentally on the fly and often comes out correct. he uses it in his sniping, allowing him to be sent on more solo missions, without the need for a spotter. coincidently his secondary talent is navigation, he is bizarrely good at maps and geo guessing games but also used to do orienteering tournaments before his “death”. after the alone mission, despite only being told where the safe house was, ghost seemed to find his way there, without a map, from a city he had only been in for like a week. I like to think his internal sense of direction is like homing pigeon level. you could stick him anywhere and he could immediately find his way back.

-Gaz is an all-round science man, a jack-of-all-trades. he has a comprehensive knowledge of biology, chemistry, physics, geology and the niche areas as well. zoology, astrophysics, ecology, palaeontology, psychology, genetics astronomy, botany, microbiology and the list goes on. you'll never meet someone with so much knowledge of the natural, social and formal sciences. he's not at university level but he has a thorough understanding of the concepts and case studies for all. he can comprehend the advanced concepts as well. its helped the 141 out of some tight spots. coincidently his personal interest is reading. his room on base and his apartment is full of academic journals and natgeo magazines.

-Alejandro. Mechanical engineering. The colonel of the Los Vaqueros can fix anything with duct tape and a prayer, but he also can build the most robust (and more importantly) high-functioning machinery. all repairs to their vehicles and heavy weaponry on base are done by Alejandro, simply because he doesn’t trust anyone else with the machines that keep his men safe. he also enjoys doing it, it gives him some time to wind down and just tinker with things. His secret talent is weaving and braiding. he was taught by his abuela to not only weave scarves and things like carpets, but also to braid her hair and his sisters once she got too old. (I head cannon him as the oldest and they all lived with their grandma cause their parents died.) he used to braid Valerias hair (as an mlm/wlw besties thing) before she betrayed them. he braided Gaz’s hair once they bonded over engineering.

-Rudolfo. Rudy is an expert in law. more specifically domestic and international criminal law, but he also keeps up with all legal disciplines. due to the proximity of Las Almas to the border, he also keeps up to date with USA law. He's a life saver in sticky jurisdiction missions. he also manages the compounds paperwork for requests. he has a silver tongue that translates to requisition forms. his personal passion is painting though. he feels that sometimes words aren't enough to describe things and loves painting landscapes and the little moments, like a flowering cactus in the middle of the night but also its death the next morning. he knows how fleeting life can be in his profession, and wants to capture all aspects. hopefully more with Ale if they retire.

-Laswell. Algorithms. typical of a spook Kate is an expert in cryptographic algorithms. she spent a few years as a cipher breaker/creator in her early career and hasn't lost her touch since moving to intelligence. all of her transmissions to her sources are hand encrypted and they have a key delivered separately. she creates them herself so that they can't be deciphered. she also does it completely in her head, nothing is typed out. her time off is spent back on her wife's farm, as her passion is animal husbandry. they raise goats, sheep, some assorted fowl and a smaller herd of cattle together. she has an Australian Shepard and a kelpie/blue heeler dog that she trained herself.

-Nik is an expert in psychology. not in your typical clinical way, but the body language, tone of voice, mindset and “takes one look and deciphers your whole life” way. His experience is immense and he applies it all the time. he can tell when a prisoner is lying in interrogation and when he's been made during undercover. Nik knows people, and frequently uses his observations to do things like blatantly walk into a restricted area with only confidence and a blank lanyard. the Russian is unparalleled in putting himself in the enemies mind space or pulling off dangerous acts in a crowded area. he’s been teaching gaz some tricks (e.g. the Amsterdam cafe mission). But on the side, he is an excellent barber. haircuts of any length and a full on old fashioned shave, with a straight razor and everything, is his special talent. he does price’s moustache, Jonnys mohawk (even though he thinks its ugly when short), learnt how to give gas a full hair treatment and even does Kates hair. he uses it for missions of course (its a great source of intel) but he also finds it to be a way to show care to his people.

bonus:

Valeria: main specialty-economics and accounting. special interest-botany (but strictly focusing on poisonous and hallucinogenic plants)

Graves: main specialty: aeronautics. special interest-being a backstabbing bitch? jk, he's actually super into smoking and curing meats. if he had joined 141 he and ghost would have eventually found common ground there. (ghost actually enjoyed his career as a butchers apprentice)

anyway that's it for now, and I'll try upload more often. feel free to repost on other platforms with credit, my twitter @ is @macG_Unit. also let me know if anyone writes pics based off these, id love to read them.

#cod mwii #cod mw22 #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #john price #kyle gaz garrick #laswell mw2 #kate laswell #alejandro vargas #rudolfo parra #nikolai cod #valeria cod #graves mw2

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kerubimcrepin · 4 months

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Episode 39 - The Love Killer

AKA the yandere dogboy episode. Yippie!

I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE. To bring back the meme:

God won't let me die...

The translation is not finished because I do not give a fuck, but here is where I stopped. I doubt anyone else will give a fuck either, considering it's just a keysmash.

He's never beating those japanese-coded allegations.

Silly aprons are a family tradition.

I wonder if this is where Kerubim lived considering he, like... didn't have a house. Or a family.

Oh my god, the shitty magical merchant guy had a shitty magical merchant mom.

I see claws on a catboy and my brain turns off. Kill me.

You can't be talking like that, Ouginak baby. Btw the can says "fish".

KERUBIM LIKES TO COOK. SEE? I TOLD YOU. I TOLD YOU. He's an Amaknean boy, like Yugo. And he's cooking crepes!

Though, he's... bad at it.

Presented without commentary.

Do not be making that face while in the same litter box as Keke, oh god.

Ecaflips use litterboxes confirmed.

UNDERAGE DRINKING REAL.

I bet Kerubim is the one who buys bamboo milk for the gang. He can probably pass for a very short ecaflip man, instead of a teenage boy.

People reading my blog talking about it be like: this is scary, downright creepy.

Also, whatever I imagine happened between Kerubim and Atcham is also scary. Even downright creepy.

The Astrubian lake tower, my beloved.

Somehow, despite being a boy, Kerubim has managed to have two evil adolescent girl friendships that end in your friend (who is a tar pit) sending you messages saying that she will "kill you with a knife" the next time she sees you at school. (One with Patafiks, and another with his literal brother.) This too, is feminism.

I like to think that while in the orphanage, he had to break up like this with Atcham too. Like "I know we're brothers, but um. uh. I don't want to be seen with you anymore. I mean—— you get beat up constantly, and people hate you, and then they hate me when you're nearby. Which is a bummer. Also you threaten everyone too much after they beat you up, and it's stressful. And I can't take it anymore... We can still be friends though,, haha."

I like to think Atcham's response was "I AM GOING TO KILL MYSSSELF AND IT WILL BE YOUR FAULT." or something. I like to imagine he had that ~mentally ill child~ style flair for the dramatic at that age. I like to think they were both awful to one another.

Another thing I like to think to myself, is that Atcham got kicked from the orphanage and ended up in Brakmar, and the reason he got kicked out is stabbing someone. Perhaps Keke, during some argument, — or perhaps someone else, in retaliation to whatever bullying he was going through. And that Kerubim was scared shitless of him by the end.

I just think it's a fun thought.

Basically, if that Ruby girl, Patafiks, and Atcham smoked weed together in a Bad Mentally Ill Bitches Obsessed With Revenge Club, Pangaea would reform.

Since this is already an Atcham headcanon heavy blogpost, I will say, I think using The Love Killer on Atcham would have fixed his every single problem.

Sadly, Kerubim has spent his entire life under the impression that Atcham actually hates him, whereas in actuality, whatever the fuck is happening, is 20 times funnier.

After a single minute of prodding by Joris he switches to therapyspeak and goes "well i need SOMEONE to be mad at. it's like a coping mechanism. if i need to be mad at something, it might as well be kerubim. because he's there. 😥"

It's interesting that with Patafiks and his ecaflip friends it took a second for them to hate him enough to cut all ties.

It's also interesting that this doesn't happen to Simone: Julie and her were on a bad date, but they were on it for a long time. And, Kerubim and Joris were haters for her, but all they could manage is some cleaning complaints.

Basically: Perhaps it can't ruin bonds that are very deep or genuine as fast? An enchantment meant to test the sincerity of a bond, gone awry? Or maybe I'm reading too much into this.

Flash frame!

As I've said in the previous blogposts: I really do think that Kerubim has a crush on Simone. Not in any creepy way — she's just the type of woman he's always liked, — headstrong and stylish, like Lou!

It's very cute. I am a big fan of friendships with one-sided crushes in media, especially when it's not awkward, or pointed out often, (the only exception being Dipper's whole Wendy-shtick in Gravity Falls. I think it was a pretty cool portrayal of the concept, despite being awkward), — because that's a very human thing that we can't really control, y'know?

It makes their friendship much more wholesome to me, personally.

Man. I love this show. And this silly old man. Even though he did fuck up superbly with the whole raising Joris thing.

#ep39 #ro liveblogs dofus #dofus #wakfu #krosmoz

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historyofshipping · 9 months

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More Teen Wolf thoughts

So I knew next to nothing about Teen Wolf when I started watching it last week. I basically just didn't interact with any fandoms when it was live and so I'm coming in without any kind of preconceived notions of who/what the good character/ships/storylines etc other than the movie sucks and I shouldn't watch it. I was also vaguely aware that Ste/rek and Stydia were fandom things.

After watching it, I scrolled through an obscene amount of tumblr stuff related to TW and I truly have to wonder if we watched the same show.

Again, it's a very different viewing experience for me because I didn't have gaps between seasons where I could theorize, over-analyze, etc. I'm also older than the target audience so like that could probably affect how I view things too.

I'll also add that my own relationship had a similar trajectory to Stydia. My partner had a crush on me while I was literally engaged to someone else and we barely knew each other, but then we had a deep friendship form over time. By the time my last relationship ended, his crush had changed to genuine love and my friendship evolved to something romantic. We've been together now over a decade.

So with all that said, here's Stydia thought: I am truly BAFFLED by the fact that people think Stydia getting together was fan service. (More under cut)

Note: I have zero interest in debating or arguing, which is why I'm hoping this won't come up in other ship tags. If you feel the need to argue, just move along because I'll either ignore you or block you. These are just my thoughts - it's not that deep.

I admit I absolutely fell in love with Stydia. I am an absolute sucker for good friends to lovers, detective duos, etc so they were *Chef's kiss* to me.

That said, I'm more than capable of separating my feelings about a ship from a story. So when people say that Stydia was forced together, I'm just kind of dumbfounded since I thought it was literally the only well-written ship in the entire show.

When we start, obviously we have Stiles obsessing over an image of Lydia in his head. But even still, he was never into her popularity or anything like that - he was into the person she was at the core, even when she kept it hidden.

Then they became friends over the course of the next few seasons and Stiles fell in love with her in a different way. He got to know her better and his feelings only deepened. However, she was with other people so he tried to force himself to move on. This is very normal in high school especially.

I did not like the Sta/lia relationship, mostly because I thought Malia deserved a lot better than someone who was clearly still into someone else, but I'm not going to get into that here.

We have canon proof that Stiles was STILL INTO Lydia during season 4&5. So much so that Kira, new to the group and mostly only around post-Malia getting involved, picked up on it: "He still likes her, doesn't he?" "Yeah, but it’s different now." "Stiles was the only one who knew." "He paid attention. He listened to her. He remembered."

Stiles is constantly the one whose main priority is getting her out of Eichen House. He storms in and doesn't give a shit about self-preservation as long as he gets to Lydia and gets her out.

He breaks through his bonds when she's about to be injected.

The camera constantly focuses on their hand touches with each other - whether it's in the hospital, the care with which they constantly stroke each other's face, etc. When Melissa was about to inject Lydia in the neck, she told Stiles specifically to hold her hand - even though he has a fear of needles.

Both of them essentially brought the other back from the dead through their connection.

When he sees her hurt or about to be hurt, it goes back to "I would go out of my freaking mind" - and he does.

Stiles was in love with her for nearly a decade. That doesn't just go away in a few months.

Now, for Lydia, we have her focused on Stiles above all else. He's the one she calls when she's in trouble or upset. She goes to him for comfort. "Stiles saved me."

Whenever there's a Stalia moment and Lydia is around, the camera goes to her for reactions. What comes to mind immediately is in the Mexico car scene where Malia says she'd come back for Stiles.

Now, any of these things individually you could say are just friendship things - and you'd be correct. Above everything, they are friends. Probably best friends. But their bond goes so much deeper than that. Both of them needed that basis of friendship before they could fall into a truly deep love for each other - and that's what we see in season 6.

So yeah, I'm not sure where people are getting the idea that it was out of the blue. It's clearly been built up over seasons and while it *could* have stayed as just very good friends, that wasn't the story they were telling. I'll concede that s6 was kind screwed up because of DOB's filming and injuries but it still wasn't out of the blue.

#teen wolf #stydia

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schizopositivity · 2 years

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Hey so like

The only times I've ever really heard people talk about schizophrenia being hard is how others are affected by it, how it's "creepy/bad/evil/scary", etc

Can you talk about the stuff that's been really difficult for you in your personal experience without it just being through the lens of how it affects others?

Thank you :)

this is gonna be a long one cause schizophrenia is very complex so im gonna break it down by symptoms and how it affects me

TW: demon, self harm, suicide attempts, csa/sa mention, death mention, delusions

•hallucinations: these were at their worst when i wasnt on antipsychotics when i was a teenager, would see little monsters running around that made me really afraid and question reality. but what i most commonly saw/felt/heard wad this demon thing that was sorta representive of a grim reaper. it would tell me that self harming would help me and i listened. it made me really scared and sad all the time. this went on for about a year and i didnt tell anyone. it had a grip on my shoulders and followed me around all the time. i cant stress enough how scared it made me. sometimes it would get loud and id panic and black out, and then get "woken up" by my mom shed find me hiding and shaking under a table. it told me i had to end my own life and i attempted twice, one of the times required hospitalization and after a psych ward (which finally got me on the antipsychotics i needed). since then the hallucinations have calmed down and i dont see the demon anymore but i do hear similar things, now i just try my best to ignore it. its more annoying than scary. like feeling a poke on my shoulder at work and having to not react cause the stigma of showing symptoms. or like seeing scary faces in everyday things and just being like "huh weird" or hearing very mean or threatening things and thinking "thats obviously not actually what im thinking, id never do something like that", hallucinations still suprise me all the time especially the first few seconds of it, but now i have the experience where i can ignore it after that

•delusions: the biggest delusion i have that i still have to this day is very much influenced by my trauma of being the victim of csa and sa literally too many times to count, i truly believe that i was made to be abused and it will happen for the rest of my life, no matter what people tell me i always will not fully trust people and think they will abuse me at any moment, when people look at me i think they are planning how to abuse me, this is such a deeply held belief and it causes me anxiety and triggers my cptsd. it makes me feel very exposed and inhuman like a piece of meat it sucks. some other delusions ive had are that im the reincarnation of kurt cobain and that im gonna be rich and famous with no plans on how to make that happen. these felt good when i was in them and horrible when i snapped out of it. i kinda miss them.

•avolition: i struggle with this a lot. i have to be told to do tasks otherwise i dont do them. i never know when or how to do daily tasks. even if i can recognize that something has to be done i have no clue what steps to take to complete that task. like when i was the only one running the nursery at a spiritual center and id see kids crying id think "someone should do something about that" even though its me that has to do something. i struggle to maintain personal hygeine, do house chores or take care of my cats. if im not directly told to do it ill just let it fester. i do well at my job because im always told exactly what to do and how to do it. this symptom makes me feel lazy, childish and stupid. because of this i dont think ill ever be able to live on my own. i am dependent on other people to show or tell me what to do to take care of myself, my house and my cats.

•flat affect: this symptom makes me feel broken. like when my favorite grandpa died and i couldnt cry. it made me question my love for him. im constantly questioning my own feelings (even though im feeling them) just because my face and voice dont match what im feeling. ive fully thought that im unfeeling or unhuman because of this. i also get accused of lying a lot because of my flat affect. and i hate being accused of lying cause when i defend myself they dont believe me and there no winning.

•anhedonia: this really sucks. i used to really love doing art and playing guitar and now it feels like a chore. this is loss of pleasure in things that used to make you happy. it just makes me sad and feel like theres nothing i can do to change it. this makes me feel hopeless and useless.

•memory loss: i forgot most of what happened this year like valentines day with my partner (my first valentines day with a partner), my birthday, my partners birthday, my friends birthdays, i forgot them all and i feel like a terrible person because of it. this makes me feel dumb and careless. but i do care so much but i just cant remember so much important events. this also shows itself in smaller ways, forgetting what ive said to people, forgetting what ive bought, forgetting the last sentance ive read in a book so often that it makes reading nearly impossible.

•prosopagnosia: i cant recognize faces and mix them up often. this shows itself most with celebreties i constantly mix them up or think two different people are one person. i also dont always recognize my own face and i feel like a stranger to myself.

•consintration issues: i have a lot of trouble consintrating on things unless they are intresting to me, which because of anhedonia is not much. its hard for me to hold conversations with people and stay in focus. i feel like a terrible person when im not able to focus or remember what people have said.

•thinking issues: i have trouble thinking clearly a lot. its either i have too many thoughts at the same time, or my thoughts feel slow or empty. this makes me feel stupid.

•speach issues: i have trouble talking a lot of time. ill think im responding but im silent. it makes me feel mean and careless. when i do talk its usually short sentances. i very rarley actually talk a lot even to people im close to.

•fatigue/impaired motor function: i need so much rest in between activities just to function. i feel lazy a lot of the time. i also sometimes have trouble with normal motor function like sometimes when im walking it turns shaky and uncoordinated.

•amnesia: this showed itself most before i was on antiosychotics, when id black out often and find myself hiding under something. now it doesnt show up as much. this makes me feel confused and unaware of what i was doing or how i was acting when i was blacked out.

•isolation/social withdrawl: this showed itself more before i was on antipsychotics. i believed that everyone i knew was plotting against me and i had to be alone to stay safe. i now know thats not true but i still struggle to keep in touch with friends and family. most of the time ill see a text and completely forget to reply and people think im ignoring them. this once again makes me feel careless and mean. i really do care about the people in my life but i just have trouble staying connected.

theres probably more that i forgot but this is what comes off the top of my head. most of the struggles of schizophrenia affect me and not other people.

#answered #mental illness #nd #neurodivergent #schizophrenia #schizophrenic #psychosis #actuallyschizophrenic #mental health awareness #pseriouslypsychotic

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dualityvn · 1 year

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Takes a very very deep breath, before covering my entire head and body with the blanket as a makeshift cocoon.

(Dear God, let this be a testament to what I'll put myself through for this one man.)

"...Tenebris, do you even realize how horrifyingly close I am to having a breakdown right now?

I'm literally wearing very few layers of clothing, in your guys' bed nevertheless, and just woke up to you witnessing me in that state. Which is embarrassing, and mortifying if you take into consideration I do have a problem with nudity and especially towards people that I'm not currently dating, perceiving me in said partly nudity. Dear God, seeing you in the near future will be very embarrassing.

Normally, you know, I would just live through this embarrassment and carry on as normally as I could.

But, if that wasn't scary enough and I haven't heard enough horror cases where in similar situations some very unsavory stuff happen. You, a literal being that can break a human like a pretzel, go ahead and threaten me... While I, may I remind you, am already having a literal panic attack. This is probably the scariest situation I'll ever find myself in and I'm very tempted to throw whatever heavy object is next to me, and call you so many names. I would be very justified to do any of these actions, because please excuse my language in advance. What the absolute fuck???

Don't even get me started on the nerve you have, to find this as a great opportunity to have such a serious talk. When you literally see me almost everyday in this house??? And you chose the one night where those questions of yours would have already been answered by what I had been planning for weeks. Weeks!

You wanted to know why my behavior keeps switching? Because as I promised, I'm trying my best to try to show Keith that I'm trying. Therapy has definitely helped me have those little sweet moments with him without anything going bad. But I have times where I revert back to the old mindset of self sabotaging and being emotionally unavailable. Why? Because it's easier to do so than have to face the fact that I'm experiencing feelings I never had for a guy. It's not always a nice experience, sometimes it hurts, and can suck so much. I feel so weak and vulnerable and I hate it. It's easier for me to lie and act like I don't have any feelings, it feels safer at times. And it's stupid, it's stupid because Keith is a wonderful guy and yes, he would never hurt me intentionally. But you can't shake those habits off. Fears are always stupid but they are not easy to deal with. Keith isn't the only one facing his demons, I too have had past experiences that made me like this.

Do you think I love not being able to hold the hand of the poor guy I'm trying to date? I would just break down if I did it. And yes, I know Keith would be very understanding. Yet what if he blamed himself or thought I was repulsed by him? I don't want him to be sad, I don't want to constantly be the cause of his sadness, damnit. Sure, I could tell him, and I was planning to actually. This was me trying to build up towards maybe you know, talking and then trying to do something small? So he wouldn't feel like I'm just constantly using excuses, or that I don't truly like him. I just can't help it. Sometimes this relationship tends to feel that it's going way too fast for me, way too intimately. Then I shut down and I fear that I accidentally hurt him. Whereas for others that stuff is so easy for them to do without a second thought. They don't have to second guess their actions and words, they don't have to think twice before even initiating a single touch.

And hell, I already had a similar conversation with Keith, I told him that I'll need more time before my words match my actual feelings. That in the future, I'll become someone deserving of him and who can love him without fear. For now, he's okay with me trying to express everything through the little everyday things I do for him. Though if Keith was feeling this insecure, I would have preferred to learn it from him. Unless, it was so serious that you had to get involved and tell me that maybe I should try harder because he was lying about being okay. Please god, don't let him actually feel this way, he doesn't deserve it.

I won't lie and say I'm not mad at you right now. I'm not that delusional to think you care about me trying, you don't even trust me. You're just waiting for me to slip up and say that you called it. You don't care whether this relationship will work out. Hell, you probably hope it won't and that Keith will end up finding someone better. And even though all my previous points still stand and you could have handled this so much better, I get that you're just looking out for him. He's practically a brother to you and you want only the best for him as well. So I don't even want an apology, and I'm sorry if I made it seem that I'm giving mixed signals. I can't promise I won't do it again, but I am slowly building towards a place of being able to be openly affectionate with Keith without feeling like I opened up too much...

Just, after you're done lecturing me, can I please talk to him? Please, Tenebris? I have a few questions to ask him and would prefer he knows at least the summary of this situation. The last thing I want is for him to feel I'm hiding stuff from him, because I know this situation will get brought up in the near future."

"Excuse me?! You're sitting in my bed, yelling at me for walking into my own room and finding you in it? Of course I'm questioning you! You're fucking weird to me! I don't get how humans work. All I know is you keep saying dumb awful stuff for no reason. And he doesn't even question you! Whatever, just put on however many clothes you need to make you not throw shit at me. You can talk to him after." - Tenebris, right before he marches out

#duality game #yandere #dating sim #visual novel #duality tenebris #tsundere chronicles

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sleepkey · 4 months

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having my mom need so much support and disability is so stressful to be around and has made existing harder than it usually is

told my dad i struggle on a good day

i keep having mental breaks

my only breaks are when i dissociate while playing games or listen to asmr falling asleep but even then i get smacked with reality constantly

its hard enough taking care of myself i am not built for this and the guilt is only making it harder

my mom has done so much for me and i cant do anything for her

i feel useless on top of it like i havent been eating but asking my dad to get me food isnt an option because he is constantly helping my mom... hes in his 70s and most of the work goes to him i dont want him to wear himself ragged because ill actually lose it if anything happens to him

i keep fantasizing about going down to the river to stare into the water and my paranoia says thats dangerous like im gonna do something dumb but realistically i just need out of the house

problem is as with doing literally anything i frankly dont have the energy

i can barely eat sleep or do anything more than the ABSOLUTE bare minimum

my will to live is being sucked out of me more and more by the day

i need out of here but anywhere else is too expensive and im poor

grateful i work from home so like i can mask it all to earn enough money to survive cuz if i still worked in store id be missing work

im just so lost and everything is a haze i can barely function

where can i turn is there a light at the end of the tunnel? is the rest of my life doomed to look like this until she passes away? i dont want to wish for her death but i see no other salvation...

wish someone would come save me but help is so far away (literally most of my friends are long distance and anybody nearby cant do anything of impact)

my dad is the only one i can find hope in but he has so much on his plate and at his age putting more on him makes me feel terrible

maybe im going around in circles but thats about how my brain has been lately. best i can do is survive and do what im told in ways that make the most minimal issues possible

id rather starve myself than be another burden

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monachopsis-11 · 2 years

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I’m having a really hard time with my dad lately, my parents are going through a divorce and he brought his girlfriend and her kids home for the night the first time we ever met them. For months they were at our house six or seven days a week sleeping in our living room so I couldn’t watch TV and eating our food.

He even invites them on family vacations without asking us and tried to kick me out of my special room at my grandparents boat house so he could have room for my sister and his girlfriend and her kids in the boathouse while I have to sleep in a spare bedroom at the grandparents house.

Then my dad decided to have them move in with us without asking me and my sister even though we’d both struggled with the adjustment and I’d told him several times I wasn’t okay with the situation only to be met with variations of “you’re being too sensitive,” “you need to try harder,” “and it’s what x wants.”

One day he takes me and my sister to our favorite restaurant and asks us how we feel about moving into a new house with them which we both say no to (btw other option was still living with them in our old house, we weren’t given a choice at all even though we’re both teenagers and not little kids) only to be told that he already decided to sell our childhood home which was the place we all were as a family and where a lot of my memories with my old best friend were.

Now we’ve been living with him, his girlfriend, and her two kids half the time (the other half I’m with my mom) since April and I keep trying to talk to him about accommodations or literally anything to help me which he refuses because it’s ‘unfair’ and ‘he asks so little already.’

Finally I tried to approach the topic of living with my mom more, I’m constantly overwhelmed and stressed at his house, barely sleep, am forced to do chores I cannot handle and expected to accept my role in his new ‘family.’ He freaked out about how unfair it was and how he had no idea we felt that way and that he doesn’t remember me ever saying I didn’t want to live with them or anything like that (he literally just forgot) and that I need to try harder while at the same time saying maybe I just need therapy or it’s an autism thing (still refuses to acknowledge that I’m autistic and says stuff like this only when it benefits him.)

He says that if what I said happened then he understands why I’m mad but at the same time defends himself by saying the divorce was my moms fault, he didn’t know he’d meet someone as amazing as x, and that he doesn’t know what he’s supposed to be doing. I told him he’s supposed to prioritize his kids and that he shouldn’t have moved in with anyone unless we were okay with it and he’s acting like that’s crazy while at the same time blaming it on me being autistic.

Like he didn’t actually make any mistakes it’s just a problem because I struggle socially and he still won’t acknowledge it’s a real thing when it doesn’t benefit him because me having different needs is an unfair burden on our ‘family’ he hasn’t done nearly enough research to know any of the language (in fact he looked at only one of two things I asked him to look at) and when he does ask me what accommodations I want I don’t even feel comfortable telling him I don’t want to do time consuming chores and when I do he gets annoyed like I’m being difficult and unfair on purpose.

He even has this awful perspective about me earning things I want by being productive in his new family, like he won’t buy me anything (clothes, bedroom stuff I need because of the move, snacks I like, clothes, Starbucks, or ‘family’ activities) and at the same time wants to spend more time with me???

He might not say it but I know he wants me to go back to masking more, even though I still am 97% of the time trying to be genuine about my emotions and struggles and ask for help has literally caused him to call me a burden and lazy even though I’m trying to get my learners permit, apply to colleges in another country, do online classes, apply to jobs, apply to grants/scholarships, apply to colleges in the US to appease my mom, navigate the awful living situation, and all the regular tasks you’re supposed to complete to be acceptable and productive.

It just makes me feel crazy and guilty, is asking not to have to do chores like mopping the whole house, cleaning the shower, washing other peoples dishes (the only thing I asked btw) too much? I’m pretty sure I’m right but I feel awful, if anyone has any advice or words of encouragement please tell me, I’m really desperate for some kind of validation or perspective and I have no one in my life I can talk to.

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marinerainbow · 1 year

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Alright, I need to make a post that isn't Disney... So let's talk about horror! Specifically one of my favorite genres:

Two Sentence Horror Stories.

Writing a story, any story, is exceedingly difficult for many ways. But to make a whole story with just two sentences? A story that enraptured the reader and makes them shake but also want to know more? Now that is talent. And I never get tired of reading them.

So, even though nobody asked, here is my top 10 favorite two sentence horror stories and why I like them so much.

TW: Horror and creepy gifs, along with very unsettling topics. You have been warned. All credit goes to the original authors.

Number 10:

I never go to sleep.

But I always wake up.

It doesn't seem like much honestly. But when you really think about it, that's when it starts to get more creepy. Why is this person constantly awake? Why do they keep waking up? What do they awaken to?

But at the same time, to me, this feels like one of those horror stories where it's more unsettling with imagery rather than on its own. I first heard it in an animated top 10 list and the imagery with it is definitely freaky, but when you take that away I don't feel so scared anymore. Chilled yes, but not scared.

Number 9:

"Now be careful, that line of rock salt is the only thing keeping them out," the man said, welcoming my group into his refuge.

"Sea salt," I clarified, "sea salt keeps us out."

I do believe in the supernatural. I'm not the kind of person who will cover my whole house in salt cause I'm so paranoid about evil spirits, but I do believe that there are some creatures out there.

I am also anxious about the thought that if I ever do encounter a dangerous spirit or creature, I will not be prepared to face it or have the wrong information, just like the poor man in this story.

Number 8:

A girl heard her mother call her by name, and started to head downstairs.

Just before she did, her mother pulled her into her room and said, "I heard it too."

If you're a fan of two sentence horror stories, you've no doubt heard this one, or a variation of it.

Like the one above, it's probably been heard a dozen times. Though it's still one of my favorites. It didn't quite help that the video I first heard this story used the name Sarah for the girl, which just so happens to be my own name. So it kinda spooked me on a personal level too.

Number 7:

I always thought my cat had a staring problem, since she always seemed to be transfixed on my face.

I never realized until now, that she was always staring right behind me.

I've lived with cats for nearly my whole life. Literally. And I believe that animals can sense things that we can't, whether it be supernatural or otherwise.

So this story makes me shiver to think about, imagining this scenario with me and my own cat. And with my own fear, the thought of anything- or anyone- being behind me without my knowledge, it just makes it even worse for me.

Number 6:

I begin tucking him into bed and he tells me, "Daddy, check for monsters under my bed."

I look underneath for his amusement and see him, another him, under the bed, staring back at me, quivering and whispering, "Daddy, there's somebody on my bed."

Every child's worst fear comes to life in the most terrifying way possible. Now the father has to make the decision, which one is his real son? And if he makes the wrong choice, or doesn't act fast enough, who knows what the consequences will be?

Number 5:

I told her there was no monster in her closet as I picked her up, and told her she could sleep with us tonight.

I figured that was the safest way off getting her out of the house without him realizing I saw him.

One of the many fears a parent would have. This is just so bone-chilling to read, I can only imagine how the narrator must have felt seeing a stranger in his daughter's closet.

Not to mention that, from the looks of things, it was a normal human intruder, nothing supernatural. To me, that just makes it even scarier. If it was a ghost or a demon, that would have been easier to deduce that the daughter is simply haunted. But a more real horror? Why was the man hiding in the girl's closet? What was he planning?

It's questions like that that are best left remained unanswered.

Number 4:

You get home, tired after a long days work and ready for a relaxing night alone.

You reach for the light switch, but another hand is already there.

I grew up in a household where at least one person was awake no matter what. And it wasn't like they had different schedules, my parents expressly told me and my siblings that it was to make sure that no one broke into the house or anything.

They relaxed on that over the years, I think, but it still stuck with me. I'm genuinely terrified of the thought of living alone now, and this story is one of the ways that perfectly captures my fear. I know someday I'll have to live by myself for some time until I start a family of my own. And this story always comes to mind when I think that.

Number 3:

The last thing I saw was my alarm clock flashing 12:07 before she pushed her long, rotting finger nails through my chest, her other hand muffling my screams.

I sat bolt upright, relieved it was only a dream, but as my clock read 12:06, I could hear my closet door creaking open.

I have lost count of how many times I've woken up in the middle of the night and thought I saw something creeping toward me. But then I would turn on the light, and nothing was there. I even have a memory from my childhood that I'm 65% sure is a genuine sleep paralysis story. Not to mention the kind of crazy or fucked up dreams I'll sometimes get before I wake up.

So when I read this story, it got to me on a personal level as well. Let me just say I'm grateful that my closet has no doors or else I'd probably try to barricade the doors every night just to reassure my subconscious.

Yeah, any supernatural creature in there may easily break through it, but at least I'll be able to get a few more minutes of peaceful sleep before I die.

Number 2:

When the kidnapper made me guess where he kept my daughter, I pointed to the basement and he said, "Correct!" And allowed me to see her.

But when I found her severed head in there, I realized every other choice would have been correct too.

Holy shit, do I even need to explain this one? A parent who was clinging onto the hope that they finally found their child, and their hope is squashed in the worst way imaginable.

It's mental, emotional, and in a way physical torture. And you can practically feel the sick, twisted smile on the kidnapper's face as you read this horror story.

And the worst part? This isn't even number one on this list.

Number 1:

After working a hard day I came home to see my girlfriend cradling our child.

I didn't know which was more frightening; seeing my dead girlfriend and stillborn child, or knowing that someone broke into my apartment to place them there.

This... Holy shit I actually had to reread this a couple of times when I first found it.

Someone breaks into my girlfriend and child's graves, takes them all the way from their burial sites to my home, breaks into my home, proceeds to purposefully place them in such a way that would have looked heartwarming if they were alive, and then (supposedly) leaves for me to find the scene all on my own with no explanation. It's like #2 but on steroids.

This isn't just a simple hatred for the victim. It's an obsession. Whether it be a love for this twisted game, or a crazy ex-lover who decides to torture their victim for leaving them, this is an obsession with mentally breaking the narrator of this story.

And that's my list. Do you guys agree? What would you pick for your own list?

#i did this before going to sleep im so brave #horror #two sentence horror stories #list #top 10 list #tw death #tw gore #my own post #tw child death #tw eye contact

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atrophy-fathers-daughter · 1 year

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Pet peeves about my roommate that literally make me consider ended it

1. Garbage in the sink I swear to fucking god who puts garbage into the sink? It makes me sick. Not only is it in the sink but it’s wet and mixed in with dirty dishes

2. She doesn’t do dishes. I went on a dish strike for 8 days where I did not go anywhere near the kitchen sink because it was so disgusting and she didn’t do dishes once, in EIGHT DAYS.

3. Dirty shoes in the house. Not just I need to grab something I forgot. Dirty shit covered shoes all through the house with no concern of cleaning up

4. Leaving the front door open. Why? Why can’t the door just be fucking closed? I have a cat and I’ve made it so abundantly clear that she can not go outside yet the door remains open every fucking day

5. Not cleaning. She does not clean whatsoever it’s disgusting

6. Complaining about her job. She doesn’t have a ‘real’ job she’s a farmer and I know farmers work they run the country but she literally doesn’t do anything she go outside for 4 hours max just to order other people around

6. Coming in my room uninvited. My room is my one place that I have control, the one place I keep clean. She comes in almost everyday to complain about her fake job and get my room disgusting. Sometimes she just comes in to shake off her dirty barn clothes and then leaves

7. Regularly leaving the stove on. Every other day I come home from work and the fucking stove is on. Is it so goddamn hard to have some fire safety

9 she’s a koreaboo. The absolute worst one I’ve ever seen. I enjoy kpop so I’ve seen saesangs and she’s worse

10. Having opinions like a white man. She’s so far right politically and it’s awful. Her opinions are the only ones that matter and if you disagree you’re wrong

11. Claiming to be asexual then telling me I’m her ‘lesbian pass’ and that I’m her lesbian. I am not a lesbian I’m an agender bisexual being constantly harassed

12. Not being okay with transgender. She has no idea I’m agender or Skye because I simply cannot deal with what would happen after that conversation. Her little brother is trans and as far as she’s concerned he’s dead to her.

13. Not believing in therapy. She’s a literal psychopath. I don’t say that lightly she has murder fantasies regularly and does kill animals‘ just because’ she once killed a cat who just had a kitten because she didn’t like it anymore.

14. Wishing her mom would kill herself because she finds her very annoying. Her mom is severely depressed and has been having an awful time since her accident which was tragic is all I’m going to say about it. She told me this proudly knowing I have tried to kill myself and have been hospitalized because of it.

15. Being against my consumption of recreational drugs. It is legal where I am to smoke weed which I do for medical reasons mostly sometimes I just feel like I need and that’s okay. I’m not an addict not that there is a problem with people who are it’s mostly just an occasional thing. I took up smoking darts because of her even though I do vape it wasn’t enough to deal with her which she is also aware is her doing.

16. Being so incredibly loud all the time. She has one volume and it’s screaming. Her voice is ruined because she’s never used an inside voice. Her hearing is gone because of her own yelling. And every time I’ve brought it up to be quiet she and I quote ‘that’s what you get for living with me’ getting a little excited is okay I get that but yelling at top volume from 8 am to 11 pm is just in called for

17. Treating me like I’m beneath her because she sublets to me. I’m less of a person because she rents out a room to me. Treating me like this is her apartment and I am an unwanted guest. I pay rent and a lot I might add to be in a single room not really allowed to do anything or use the living room. Because that’s hers and I can use it if I don’t change the tv or move anything.

18. Telling me to move out so she can turn my room into a ‘mannequin room’. If you didn’t think she was a psychopath before she wants a room dedicated to mannequins. Not to use just to have there because it would be better than having a human friend.

19. Not letting me have friends over because she doesn’t like them, yet inviting her friends over on a week night to be even louder because she doesn’t care that I have work in the morning

20. Making me take her places. She does not drive anywhere she has a license and car. She’s a terrible driver that shouldn’t be on the roads but that’s not why I have to drive. She just doesn’t like to and thinks is better that I’m a chauffeur. Never has she once paid for gas and I don’t know if you’ve noticed but gas is fucking expensive. Buying me a drink most times when we go out is good enough to her.

21. Hating my style. She hates on what I wear because I’m more punk/ getting into gothic even though her preferred fashion is tech wear which is also alternative fashion. She also hates the mohair I like even though I like kpop we don’t listen to the same groups and has to comment on how bad she thinks what I enjoy is

22. Constantly victimizing herself. She’s a bully and all around bad person who thinks every problem is about her. Her brother who’s trans said she makes him feel like killing himself and she thinks that just him trying to make her feel bad. She’s constantly fishing for compliments to make her self feel better like asking you to tell her she’s not terrible or stupid.

23. Not believing in therapy. She thinks therapy is a joke and seeing a therapist is stupid and makes you week. The only reason I have survived being around her is because I was in intensive therapy for years. The only thing keeping me together is working through my issues with a licensed professional but to be that’s just a joke and a waste of time.

I’ll probably have more but I think that’s all I can handle thinking about for now, thank you for coming to this long winded rant and I’m sorry this is on the Internet

#mental health #sorry for the rant #lgbtq #roomates #illnesses #koreaboo #angry rant #list

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