#i promise you i'm not one of those angry “it wasn't in the book!” fans

[coffee-with-mint-syrup]

Look, I didn't want to be "that" person

who criticizes something just because "it was different in the books".

But I love PJO just way too much to not feel frustrated at the tendencies of modern adaptations that I think new series is suffering from. And I feel much more frustrated because in others aspects the new show is great.

First of all, what's with this downplayed brutality of PJO world? The moment Sally started her speech about Perseus I smelled trouble. In her story, in her reasoning she named him after Perseus because of this beautiful story where happy ending is just something that happens. While in the books thats a huge deal that Percy is named after THE ONLY HALF-BLOOD HERO that had that happy ending. That fact is supposed to highlight the mortality rates and that for most of these demigods happy ending is pretty much NOT IN PROSPECT. Like, despite that rambling post I'm usually fine with some differences that are made in adaptations, most of them I usually can understand. But why do you need change the message of "I named you that way because I hope you will live happily ever after despite being in constant danger" to "I named you that way because it's a beautiful story about a mother and a son"? Especially when they absolutely could do both?

Secondly, the Gabe issue. You see, Percy Jackson books were great because they were able to discuss with children some pretty heavy themes without downplaying them - like domestic abuse. And that scene with poker players and Gabe getting from Percy money was brilliant because it showed that Gabe was so awful that he took everything he could even from a 12 y.o. There were also heavy implications that he beat Percy. But now Gabe is just your usual jerk who is lazy and doesn't have a good relationship with his stepson and argues with his wife all the time. Look, I know, that is awful too, I know that. But the point of Gabe that he was absolutely the worst. That he's the worst of the worst that's why he smells on this metaphysical level and is able to hide Percy. That he kinda deserved what happened to him in the end. And now I sure that we won't get that end because apparently that stuff is too brutal for kids. If they're afraid that much younger audience would get shocked by it they could at least do that in hints, you know. Old shows were great with things that you didn't understand as a child and then later while rewatching them you finally could get the message.

And what's with this Grover thing? Okay, I understand they probably didn't have the time for establishing why Percy would feel betrayed by his teacher but wanted to save this "low point" for Percy's character. But why? Why? How Percy as a character and we as viewers are supposed to feel that amazing friendship if it started for us with betrayal? That just sucked.

Also, personal flaw - they really could insert "This is a pen" line when Brunner gave Percy the pen. They really could and that would be so awesome. But they didn't.

And the sad part is that now I understand that there was no way they could include this important stuff in the series. Because Disney is too afraid to show domestic abuse. They afraid to show Sally Jackson that put up with heavy abuse just to keep her son safe. They afraid to show that literal children die in PJO world. That that half-blood stuff is no game - as Percy said in the very first minute of the series. For fuck's sake they didn't even mention him having ADHD! They implied that by saying that he was being weird! That was so so so so important that those things that kids with ADHD are struggling make them so special and strong in their own way. And now that message is gone too.

And all of that is because Disney doesn't have any balls left. It's like they sanitize everything they make into that 0+ versions of stories while sometimes the point of the story is in discussing something from a real, sad and unsanitized world.

The stuff I listed is just from the first episode and I don't know if the show will go that way, if this tendency of sanitizing the story will continue or not. I'm just really afraid that all of that means that they decided to leave out all the brutality that made Percy Jackson so iconic. It is like watching this new version of Harry Potter where he doesn't live under the stairs - that maybe doesn't change much story-wise but it's just not the same Harry Potter that way.

I want to like the show, I really do. Walker is so amazing is this role. Other actors are really great. I see the effort, I see how people tried to make this adaptation as close to books as they could. The show looks truly amazing. The fight with minotaur was absolutely stunning. Ending sequence is a masterpiece. I have so many good things I can say about it. But those little things they changed - they weren't little at all. A huge chunk of what made those books so special at least for me is gone (especially in comparison with Harry Potter books). And I can't help feeling sad.

#i'm really sorry for being bitter #i promise you i'm not one of those angry “it wasn't in the book!” fans #i feel alright with changes and sacrifices that were made for the adaptation #it's just the things they chose to change if this makes sense #that is saying something and i don't like the way it goes #maybe it will turn out fine in the end #i really hope so #no intention of hating something here #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo #pjo series #percy jackson series #long post #spilled thoughts #sorry for rambling

[deadbydangit]

I was referring to "Getting into an Argument with them" with Vittorio, Feng and Jonah, sorry for not specifying

I believe I can. I'm sorry this one took me so long, I didn't have very many good ideas for it. I still really don't. But, please enjoy anyways.

Getting into an argument with them: Vittorio, Feng, Jonah

Vittorio Toscano

He's pretty mild-mannered in general.

Vittorio tends to be very passive.

He's that, Make Love Not War, type of guy.

And he's able to let most things go.

So would take a lot for you to get into an argument.

Something really bad would have to happen.

Something along the lines of you putting yourself in great danger.

Or you doing something unbelievably cruel for no reason.

If it's the second reason, he wouldn't talk to you for days.

Depending on how cool it was, he might even leave you on the spot.

He's seen enough unnecessary cruelty in his life. He doesn't want to see anymore.

Especially from his partner.

Now if you put yourself in danger, that's a different story.

He doesn't get as mad as he gets hysterical.

He'll make a big deal out of the issue, dragging it on for days and days till you're annoyed with him.

"What were you thinking? Are you insane? Do you know how hurt you could have gotten?"

"What would I do without you? How would I continue to live knowing I let you get hurt like that?"

If anything, he's more upset with himself for not stopping you sooner.

Make sure you give him lots of affection and lots of affirmation.

And a very truthful and honest promise that you'll never do what you did again.

After that, just grab a book and read to him.

Or, just lay in his lap and allow him to keep you close by.

That's a surefire way to help him feel better.

Feng Min

She's usually pretty laid back.

But she has a couple things that will send her into a rage.

But these things are usually easily avoided.

One, if she loses a game in some cheap way.

If that happens, just avoid her for at least 30 minutes.

Or discreetly give her another game to play.

Then she'll go back to her usual self.

Another is if you interrupt her during a game that she can't pause.

If that happens, it's better to back out of the room, quickly apologize, and talk to her after the game.

If you needed her for something, she'll come and get you after her game.

She'll even thank you for waiting.

But there are times when she just gets unbelievably angry.

And during those times all little things set her off.

Her controller isn't where she left it.

Her hair is in her face.

It's too hot in the room.

Things that you can't control, she'll blame on you.

If anything, she acts more like a spoiled brat.

You can say that, but that's only going to make things worse.

She'll yell and stop her feet before just leaving.

In about an hour or so she'll come back.

And it's obvious she's feeling really bad about it.

But, she's too proud to say it out loud.

She'll apologize, but it won't feel like much of an apology.

She'll get you snacks though.

If it was a really bad fight, and she knows it was her fault, she will come back very remorseful.

She's not a big fan of talking about her feelings,but she'll do it this time.

For you.

And only you.

Don't worry, there will still be snacks.

Jonah Vasquez

Jonah can be very high strung.

Considering his past, you can't blame him too much.

However, unless you do something really bad, he isn't one to usually get angry with you.

However, one thing you could do that would anger him the most is scare him on purpose.

Again, considering his past and everything he went through, it's a pretty understanding issue.

Now, if you did it by accident, like you open the door and he wasn't expecting you, that's a different story.

He might be a little shaken up, but he'll brush it off soon after.

If you do it on purpose?

He might start yelling.

But, at the same time he's shaking violently.

And hyperventilating.

And he won't let you touch him.

He might even physically push you away if you try.

He'll want to remove himself from the situation as soon as possible to try and calm himself.

And if you pursue him, he might snap at you.

And his words can be hurtful.

He doesn't mean it, but you did something to him that he's asked you to never do.

If anything, he feels betrayed and it's justified to speak to you like this.

You'll need to give him some space and time.

Depending on how badly you scared him, it might be a couple days before he's ready to talk to you again.

And make sure you make sound when you're near him.

That way he knows you're around.

If you don't, he might think you're trying to scare him again.

Once he's ready to talk he'll sit you down and explain the situation.

He's aware he didn't react as well as he could.

But, in his defense, he's asked you not to do that.

It will be a time for both of you to apologize for what you had done.

He won't cry, but he'll definitely give you a long tight hug and make you promise to never do that again.

#dbd imagines #dbd ask blog #dbd x reader #dbd survivor #dbd feng min #dbd johna #dbd vittorio

[theultimatenonbinarynerd]

Mel's Top 3 Reading Recommendations

Introduction

As I enter my third year of reading I can now say that I have read enough books that I can start recommending some of my favourites to people. As of this blog I have read 77 books since 2022 and let me tell you its been a fun ride for sure. One promise I intend to keep though is to try read diversely and not just pick up Marvel, Star Wars and Doctor Who books. I mostly am starting to fulfil that. When I was younger all I read was Daisy Meadows Rainbow Magic Fairies Novels but as an older reader I'm going to do my best to make sure my reading is enjoyable and as diverse as possible.

I'll make another list once I'm six years back into reading but for now these books are books that have made a huge impact on me and are ones I would demand for you to check out if you haven't done so. These books are books that instantly sparked with me and that I found relatable. I can assure that the list isn't just scifi or Star Wars and Doctor Who novels. These are novels that struck a strong impression with me that are some of my favourites. I need to listen to more novels

There's been a lot of highlights but as much as I've loved them I've felt like those highlights haven't been as important to share. The books I've chosen are so important that I believe the 2nd and 1st entries need to be on the English Curriculum instead of outdated poop such as Of Mice And Men. Whilst the third entry is still an important read I feel like the top 2 are good educational tools whilst also being enjoyable books in general. The sad thing is though that I know they'd refuse the two books I've chosen due to their queer themes. So I'm sharing them with everyone is this post so that they can get the hype that they deserve.

Without further or do I'm proud to present

3: Light Of The Jedi By Charles Soule

Now I know what you're thinking but Mel this is a Star Wars book I don't even like Star Wars- Shhhhh. You may not like Star Wars but let me tell you with honesty that The High Republic is one of the best Star Wars eras due to how fresh it feels and who inclusive it is. If your a Star Wars fan and haven't read these your missing out. If your not a Star Wars fan I'd still recommend this one due to how orginal is and how it focuses on community and people coming together during a disaster.

For those who haven't read this wonderful introduction into The High Republic. Light Of The Jedi follows the pov of mutiple Jedi and government figures as they try stop a hyper space disaster from ravaging other planets. The villians The Deadly Nihil may or may not have pov chapters too. Normally stories with mutiple characters pov would be really hard to follow but not only does Soule manage to make it work he also manages to make it super entertaining.

It's such a unique way of story telling and a really good introduction to the Star Wars world even for those who may have never seen the films. If your a prequels fan and hated The Jedi this book will entirely shift your view on them and make you angry they fell so far into The Jedi of the prequels. There's also some really healthy Master Apprentice dynamics such as Bell and Loden as well as Burryaga and Nib. Its so refreshing and made me not only hooked on The High Republic but also desperate to pick up more Star Wars books.

Can recommend enough giving this book a chance as I promise it'll be worth it.

I had no idea that the next book would be so gut Punching. My second recommendation is...

2: When Our Worlds Collided By Danielle Jawando

I have never been more thankful that I picked up a book out of sheer impulse. This wasn't on my wishlist but I went with my friend and once I read the synopsis I impulsively bought it along with the book I went to the store for. At the time I didn't know if I'd made the right decision but now I know I did. This is one of those books that in my opinion needs to be in the UK education curriculum instead of harmful ableist books like Of Mice And Mine. It's so educational and raises awareness of what it's like to be a black teenager in the UK. It critiques society's harmful structure and also shows that tragedy as difficult as it has the ability to bring people together. I loved and if anybody is looking to diversify their tbr I'd recommend it in a heartbeat.

For those who haven't read the novel When Our Worlds Collided follows teens Chantelle, Marc and Jackson as their worlds collide after witnessing the murder of 14 year old Shaq. Their world view gets flipped and they have to question the institutional systems in police. All of the teens are in Yr 11. Chantelle a working class teen has to deal with a teacher who is deeply prejudice towards her, Marc has to deal with a new school and the struggles of being black in the foster and Jackson who comes from a rich background has to find his true friends and discover what he wants in life. All of them are relatable and have like I teased their own struggles to deal with throughout the book and Shaq's death fuels them and their new friendship.

It's a deep and heavy novel but super important novel to read. Of course I'd give a trigger warning for any bipoc readers but if your you must check it out. You want everything to be happy and go well but you eventually get a wakeup call and realise that's not releastic. It does have a lot of black truama but it's also hopefull and allows for these three teens to form a life long friendship. The sad bits are heavy but the lighthearted moments make you smile. My favourite lighthearted moment had to be Chantelle and Marc teasing Jackson over his love for Star Wars.

So I'm begging you please check it out, it's the book you didn't know you needed to pick.

Now my final pick is another book that early teen Mel absolutely needed. It healed my inner child. My number one recommendation is...

1: The Many Half-Lived Lives Of Sam Sylvester By Maya MacGregor

This book saved me. I'm so glad I picked it as one of the first queer books to read. I've had a lot of religious truama and struggled to accept myself being Nonbinary but this book was super affirming and it was so glad to have Sam's identity normalised. The best part though was the incredible Autism representation. Like Sam I'm Autistic and Nonbinary and I felt like the Autism representation was perfect. Nobody was ableist to Sam and they all accommodated them. Even the teachers were brilliant. I also loved how their special interest of studying people who died before 18 wasn't mocked or turned into a caricature. The murder mystery itself was also really gripping. No spoilers but it feels like the scene from Spider-Man Homecoming where Peter opens the door and discovers who The Vulture is. It's a book that slaps and is gonna be a super gripping read.

For those who haven't read the novel. The story follows Sam Sylvester a teen who isn't optimistic about their move to Astoria after experiencing truamatic hate crime in their previous town. Things get much more exciting when they not only meet new friends and a potential partner but also discover they are living in the same house where Billy a teen is the 1980s "accidentally" died. Sam and their new "friend" Shep aren't convinced it was an accident though so they decide to investigate. And let's say the answers don't disappoint at all.

It's an amazing novel with am entertaining mystery to solve, found family and healing from the past. It also really portrayed autism well and didn't turn Sam's special interest into a characteriacture you can tell an actually Autistic person wrote the novel. The queer representation is written just as well too. The author talk really informed how much love Maya put into the novel.

Like I said it healed my inner child and is overall just a wonderful book. You should absolutely check out, it has some of the best Autistic representation ever and has scenes that will leave you a gape when you realise Vulture was Liz Shaws Dad.

Out Of All My 5 Star Reads This Is Definitely The One I'd Pick Out The Most.

Conclusion

So that has been my Top 3 Reading Recommendations I hope at least one book has appealed to you and I absolutely promise to do another once my 5th year of getting back into reading is complete.

There's still so much I want to read and am excited to do so. Whilst I love Star Wars books I am trying really best to diversify my tbr as I don't want another situation where I only read Rainbow Magic Fairy books. Sam Sylvester and When Our Worlds Collided are clear examples of contemporary novels I've been able to enjoy.

Reading is great but remember that even if you want to do it for "fun" diversifying your tbr is important.

-Melody-

They/Them

#bookworm #bookish #booklover #book tumblr #storygraph #star wars #bipoc author #lgtbqia+ #lgtbq community #queer author #autism representation #actually autistic #autistic author #star wars books #star wars the high republic

[sirensmojo]

"Crossroads" - Michael Gray x Reader

Warnings: Big fluff.

Summary: You visit Michael in the hospital for the first time in years after his departure from your village.

*Masterlist*

A/N: this is my first Michael Gray fic, plz take that into consideration...

“There’s a girl asking to see you, Sir.” The nurse informed Michael, “Do you accept the visit?”

“Who is it?” His eyes lifted up from the white bedsheet he was staring at, blankly.

“A certain Y/N.”

At the announcement of your name, his dull eyes lightened up, but it didn’t last. His mind suddenly got clouded with the hundreds of questions he usually was asking himself when alone.

Were you alright? Did you get out of town as you promised each other, were you still visiting his “mother” on Wednesday's afternoons, were you angry at him for leaving you?

“Yeah, let her in.” His answer was full of apprehension, making the nurse unsure of letting you in. She stayed there watching as the man shifted position, trying to get comfortable as he knew your reunion wouldn’t be easy. “I said let her in,” Michael squinted his eyes at the nurse seeing she was still there, and that’s when she got out.

He exhaled deeply, mentally preparing himself but he couldn’t escape the tremendous flow of emotions washing over him.

You were his first love, the first girl he ever saw as a woman, even if you were still quite young. He just couldn't ignore the way he felt when he used to be with you, even after all this time, even after going out with other girls, your face never left him.

“Michael.” You hesitantly entered, unsure of the fact coming in here was a good idea.

You were in town for quite long now, but never took the time to search for him. Not because you didn't care, it was the opposite.

He had never kept from you his wish to leave your little village and you thought that maybe having you in his life now wouldn't bring him anything but memories of a place he wanted to forget.

But as the time passed, you realized you couldn't get him out your mind, no matter how hard you tried. No matter what you did, it all came back to him in the end.

His smile, laugh, touch and love, you missed everything.

You knew very well the Peaky Blinders, just like every Birmingham residents, and you knew he was one of them.

You used to tease him back then about him leaving the village after burning it or something, and here you were, him being part of a gang. This couldn't fit your Michael best.

He was a very intelligent, talented, kind and good person, but you always knew that deep down, this tranquillity was hiding a darker side, a deeper meaning of who he was.

It wasn't a surprise at all for you when you heard about his new life, you were even quite happy that he could express himself and evolve in a favourable environment.

He seemed preoccupied with something but his eyebrows unknitted at the sight of your face.

Your finger waved curls were perfectly falling on each side of your head, and Michael’s eyes were falling over your olive designed dress, tassels falling right under your knees.

He always loved this green on you, and that only hit you now.

The aggressively sexy green dress you told him you would, one day, wear in the streets so everybody could be shocked and talk about how a woman should dress.

If you remembered this detail this morning you wouldn’t have come in this dress. Now, Michael was looking at you with those gleaming eyes and you knew that when his eyes will lift up to yours, you’ll find in them the same sparks behind his iris as when you were younger.

Maybe coming in here truly was a bad idea.

“Y/N,” he kept a stern face but you were reading him like a book. His hands were clammy, his jaw clenched, his shoulders tensed along with all his muscles.

You could see he was as nervous as you, and you also knew that if you could read him that easily he probably could do the same with you.

Michael was sitting on his bed straight like an “I”, and that’s only when you sat at his side that he leaned backwards on his pillows.

That idea of knowing each other despite time and distance was what helped you to breathe out the air you didn't realize you were holding, leaving your chest less heavy.

You didn’t dare to stay in his eyes, too occupied searching for your cigarettes anyway. You got one out of their case and handed it to the man that was shamelessly staring at you.

“You changed.” Were his first words, and you couldn’t blame him.

Michael grabbed the cigarette and stuck it in between his fine lips before you came lightening up the tip of it for him.

When he left you were still growing up, rough look and only wearing the elegant blue pants your mother accepted you to wear. You were obsessed with pants and used to always argue about the fact women couldn’t wear them.

“Not a bit, and you haven’t either.” You teased him. It was obvious he changed, even the way he was talking was different, and you couldn’t even imagine what else in him had changed if the external changes were that evident.

His eyes drifted to you once again, what a surprise it was for him to see you dressed up as you were with your high heels.

Men have looked at you before, but the way Michael laid eyes on you was different, you found fondness in it, perhaps love? Because after all, there was still love between you, right?

Else his chest wouldn't raise that quickly and he wouldn't flutter his eyes when you would catch him staring at you.

He chuckled and offered you a warm smile before puffing on his cig. He got lost in thoughts for a moment, doing the french inhale.

Nevertheless, Michael seemed so much more distant than what you remember. Either he was staring, either he was blanking looking into the void.

He never talked too much either, but presently his silence could kill you. You just wanted to feel his hands all over you again, but you couldn't jump on him as if your story happened yesterday.

The atmosphere tensed, “I knew you would start smoking.” You let out in a huff. “Mrs Johnson was so wrong about you, it wasn’t me corrupting you, you always had it in your blood.” You concluded, the words escaping from your mouth as you were failing to stop them.

You got a cig for yourself and Michael watched you carefully, following each of your movements as if you were to disappear in a cloud of smoke if he’d just blinked.

“No,” He clenched his jaw and shook his head as his eyes darkened, "I found it here."

"Find you?"

He nodded slightly as puffing on his cig. 'You don't ask why I'm here?" He raised a brow towards you.

"I read the news, you're a peaky boy now." You winked at him.

"It's not what you think, Y/N." He was chuckling, shaking his head to both sides.

"Well, my Micheal wearing suits and being part of a dirty business, that's what I think and that's what it is. And that's sexy." You were so concentrated imagining him in his suit you didn't realize you called him yours, but Gray noticed it, which led to his lips stretching into a smile.

"I knew you were about to tell it." He flicks his fingers, looking at you with squinting eyes.

You took advantage of that exchange to look at his face, examining each of his features and internalizing everything you missed during these years apart.

"You're sexy Michael, deal with it already." You stated outright.

You always liked that about him. He wasn’t talking much, not with his words at least, but his eyes bore enough emotions by themselves. If they could talk they would spill hundreds of words on the paper with no difficulty.

"Yeah? Well, I prefer when you tell that in other circumstances."

His words echoed in your head and you didn't know if he was making a sexual reference or if he just woke up the horny you.

You tilted your head to the side a second, puffing on your cig before the tip of your fingers instantly reached for his soft skin. You were rubbing the side of his face gently with your knuckles when you remembered something.

“I left the village over a year after you, my mother died and I just couldn’t stay there, you know.” Talking was your way of coping with the fact you were reunited with your teenage love.

“I’m sorry.” His facial expression changed, he now understood why you were here. Not that he was unhappy about your visit, but he wouldn't have thought you’d ever leave this village.

“Everything I know is there” was the answer you gave him every time he encouraged you to go to the cities to try to make a living out of clothing. London, Birmingham, whatever, as long as you would be able to be who you wanted to be, and live your passion fully.

You wanted to make clothes and Michael had always been your number one fan, solely because he was the only one to see the gorgeous dresses you were sewing, but still your number one fan.

“I’m currently working to be able to own my workshop. So everything’s fine.”

He peeked at your lips while you were doing the french inhale, but ended up staring at your lips as if they were mesmerizing him.

You ignored that as well as you ignored all the signs he still felt things for you since you came into his room.

“Michael, the reason for my visit is family. I Know you found your biological mother and all, but you got another family out there, right?” You got up and joined the table to crush your cigarette into the ashtray, a vain attempt to prepare you for what you were about to announce. “Mr Johnson’s gone... I heard he died in his own bed.”

You threw him a glance, you wanted to know what he was thinking at this moment because his face was unreadable. Even though you knew him more than he knew himself, you grew apart from each other, and here was standing in front of you, a version of Michael you did not know.

He was blankly looking at the void in front of him, fisted clenched around the sheets.

You got closer to him, putting down the ashtray on the nightstand and sat down at his side again, but this time you slipped one of your hands into his as your other one, slowly turned his head towards you, so you could look at him in the eyes.

“I’m sorry.” You muttered as you were nearing your face to his.

It’s when you felt a little squeeze on your hand that you completely dared to give yourself to him, leaning a slow kiss over his lips.

You then pulled away, but before you could go anywhere, you felt his free hand at the back of your head, pulling you closer for another kiss, this one being feverish.

Of course, he was still loving you. It couldn’t be any different.

His hand shifted from your head to your cheek, his thumb rubbing it softly. His tender fondles contrasted perfectly with the roughness of his kisses. They became needier and needier, as if he waited to do this for a long time.

You both finally let go of the other’s lips when your lungs were screaming for air, your lids directly opening into the other’s eyes.

Here we go again, that twinkling light dancing at the back of his deep blue eyes.

“Something actually changed there,” You caressed his lips with your index, “I didn’t remember your lips tasting this way, neither you being that much of a good kisser.” Your suave voice murmured inches away from him.

You were so close you could feel his warm breath against the sensitive skin of your lips.

“Well, teach me.” His voice aroused something inside of you, and you found yourself squeezing your thighs together.

PEAKY BLINDERS TAG: @retromafia

(ask me if you want to get in one of the tag lists)

#Michael Gray x Reader #Michael Gray #Peaky Blinders #peaky blinders fic #peaky blinders imagine

[deans-mind-palace]

Skies are different in Vancouver

Pairing: Jensen Ackles x fem!Reader

Summary: You have a hard time while your finance is in Vancouver for three months. However, you know that Jensen will always return to you in the end.

Word Count: 1,106

Warnings: Fluff, a bit angsty

Author’s Note: Based on this request by Anonymous Could I request for a Jensen Ackles x Female reader? I haven’t been doing so good lately and I’d really like an angsty and fluffy one shot. Maybe the reader is going through something bad and is touch starved and lonely while Jensen is away filming. He notices it and comes home to help her? I hope you like it and that you're feeling better soon! Enjoy and shower it with your love, guys! 

Like always, my tag lists are OPEN

Check out my other stories: Masterlist

The first rays of the sun woke you from your sleep that morning. Like the nights before, you felt as if you hadn't slept at all. You were tired and you were in pain. Sleepy, you rubbed your eyes until your vision became clear.

With a sigh you realized that you had rolled back to Jensen's side of the bed in your sleep. But his strong arms had not welcomed you there. A glance at the alarm clock next to your bed told you that it was just a little after six in Vancouver. Jensen would have to get up soon to get ready for the shoot today.

Your fiancé had already been in Canada for two months and the distance between the two of you became more and more unbearable every day. It was a hard time for both of you. You missed him so much that there were no words to describe how much you yearned for his closeness.

You got up and began to prepare for the day. All day long you tried to distract yourself from the fact that 3,629 kilometers separated you, the distance from Austin to Vancouver - without success. Again and again your thoughts drifted to him.

It happened while you were sitting on the porch with a book. You had read the same sentence for the fourth time, but again and again your thoughts had drifted to Jensen. You wondered what he was doing now. Whether he was on a break or standing in front of the camera with Misha and Jared? Was he just sitting in his mask with a coffee and thinking about you? Did he miss you as much as you missed him? The ringing of your cell phone ripped you out of your murky thoughts. You put the book aside and ran inside to get your phone from the kitchen block where you had left it earlier. The caller ID flashed and your heart skipped a beat. With quick steps you crossed the spacious kitchen and at the last moment you reached your mobile phone, which sounded the typical Skype ringtone.

"Hey, Jensen." you greeted your fiancé in the familiar surroundings of his trailer. "Hey there, babe." Jensen's deep, cheerful voice sounded tinny from the speakers of your mobile phone and yet it sent a familiar shiver down your spine. It was so good to hear his voice. It took a moment for the image to clear and for you to finally have him in front of you. He beamed at you and the screen froze, so it looked like he was moving in slow motion. His beautiful, apple-green eyes were pixelated and you felt a longing pull in your heart. How you'd like to see the sparkle that they wore whenever Jensen looked at you. But the quality of the video transmission was not good enough.

Jensen examined you closely. "You look tired, baby," he said, and his face took on a serious expression. "Look at yourself." you jokingly tried to avoid his question. It was true. The actor looked tired, his face looked pale, which made the freckles stand out even more. But Jensen wasn't deterred by your maneuver. "I had a hard day. But seeing you makes up for everything. How are you? You look very exhausted. Don't you sleep well?" Of course, Jensen had noticed the dark circles around your eyes.

"I'm fine, Jay. Don't worry about me." You tried to reassure your worried fiancé. "I can see you're not fine, sweetheart." he murmured softly, as if those words were meant just for you and him. "I just miss you so much." "I miss you, too, baby. But it's only three more weeks and then we're done." You swallowed. Three more fucking weeks. That's 21 days. 504 hours. 30,240 minutes. 1,814,400 seconds. Time stretched as thick as bubble gum. "We can do it. I love you." Jensen promised you. You nodded and were about to open your mouth when he interrupted you. "Someone is calling for me. I have to go to the set now. See you tomorrow, baby. Sleep well." Before you could even respond, your fiancé hung up and the screen went black. "I love you, too," you mumbled, knowing that he couldn't hear it anymore.

After you had prepared your dinner and were now sitting alone at the big dining table that you usually shared with Jensen, you just stirred listlessly in your food before dropping the spoon onto the plate. You had no appetite anyway. It was strange, because you could have sworn that no one had called for Jensen just before he hung up. You put your head in your hands. It was difficult to have a relationship with an actor. Jensen went on shooting for months, was loved by thousands of fans who would take your place at the slightest opportunity and you could never be sure if Jensen was just playing a role for you.

Angry at yourself, you put the bowl in the sink. What were those thoughts? Of course you trusted your husband. You just based your doubts on the fact that you hadn't held each other in your arms for so long. You tried to relax in front of the TV before you went to bed, but you didn't really notice the images flickering on the TV. Tiredness affected your limbs like leaden heaviness and with your fingers groping for the remote control you turned off the TV.

You hauled yourself laboriously up the stairs before you finally fell into your soft bed. You painfully realized how cold the mattress next to you was. Hurriedly you closed your eyes in the hope that sleep would soon carry you off into other worlds.

It was very early in the morning, the sun had not yet risen, when a sound tore you from your sleep. You couldn't name it and were just about to turn around and go back to sleep when you felt the mattress of your bed sink under a strange weight. Suddenly, a pair of strong arms tightened around you. Sleepy, you turned around. "Hmm, Jensen?" Your voice was still covered by sleep, while you felt your fiancé pull you tighter against his chest and buried his nose in your hair. "Yeah, it's me, baby. Go back to sleep." his deep voice resounded in the darkness. You had missed the dark rumbling in his chest.

"But - how? You can't just--" you muttered, your mind still as muddled as cotton wool from sleep. "I told them that I need quality time with my girl."

That was all you needed to hear.

Dean/Jensen tags: @vicariouslythruspn​ @crazybutconfidentaf​ @zizzlekwum​ @outofnowhere82​ @rintheemolion​ @myopiamystical​ @vicmc624​ @imaginationisgrowth​ @seven-seas-of-fuck-you​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​ @fortheentries @readsreblogsfics​ @akshi8278​ @hobby27​ @thewintersoldierswife​ @squirrelnotsam​ @transparentfestivaltiger​

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