#if you do not? they will keep getting worse bc worse is what /they/ want and are and unless acted upon by an outside force that will not

[yuwuta]

yuuta exhibits such previously abandoned, recently adopted dog behavior. incredibly anxious all the time, even though nobody’s out to get him or leave him behind. waits for you to return home or from school or from work excitedly, just to see you when you walk through the door. follows you around senselessly, hovering in your space just for the sake of companionship. initiates affection in prodding ways—starts off next to you, then a hand on your thigh, then deems it safe to lay all the way down, then slowly pushes his head into your lap. gets up whenever you need to get up, and resumes his position as soon as you’re ready. brings you gifts as a sign that he’s thinking of you, and maybe because he likes the affection it brings out in you, maybe because he likes the gentle affirming touches of a hand in his hair or a pinch to his cheek. rests his head on your stomach or his chin on your shoulder when he’s sleepy, stays there, immobile, and will not move unless absolutely necessary. sometimes he gets surprised when he hears you calling for him, there’s a moment of disbelief as he thinks “me? really? you need me?” but it’s very quickly overshadowed by this compulsive need to show up, to please, to do anything for you, which is why he always answers when you call. he doesn’t realize that he has puppygod eyes, especially when he’s excited or confused, but he does and it’s incredible endearing. very reluctant to share your space or attention after a while, considers that to be sacred and he won’t risk being let go or lost again, so as a safety precaution, he keeps himself right by you, waits for you always. 

#atp i need to shut and write the omega verse fics that consistency plague my mind #but while im here time for my obligatory megumi mention bc i mentioned dogs teehee #yes megumi attack dog hes megumi grumbly yes megumi bark bark bite bite BUT BUT BUTTTT #megumi is also used to like... hm........ taming? having? caring for? people in his life and also literal (divine) dogs #so for him yes he bites and barks #but he also... he gets confused if YOU dont follow him around like a puppy bc everyone else in his life has so why not you? #gojo's always been the annoying yapping pomeranian chewing on his arm even if he didn't ask #always in megumi's space even tho he didn't ask but he learned to deal with it #won't admit it but knows that too much attention is better than having someone who couldn't give a shit about you #yuuji is the golden in everybody's life and megumi is no exception #unmovable unshakeable and incredibly addictive even if he doesn't mean to be #and very very attached to the people he cares about so yeah yuuji is loud and annoying but he's also loyal and megumi respects that so fine #nobara is like... she decided she liked megumi and was upset about it so she bit his ankle and he tried to kick her off but she has too muc #pride to get shaken off by someone as scrawny as megumi and somewhere along the way megumi became impressed that she was still there even i #it hurt a bit and she was a little rough it's not like he was worse so fine whatever she can stay too #so if you like... if you dont hover around megumi if you dont pry if you dont prod then he has to be the dog smh #now he's gotta bite for your attention and nudge you and how annoying. he's gonna keep doing it tho. as long as he has to #or until you learn to fall in line and accept your leash too whichever comes first n e way.... anyway............. #somebody's pampered omega always gets what he wants megumi complex is showing...... #this was about yuuta right? ok i'll put his tags now.... #juju #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #yuuta okkotsu x reader #yuta okkotsu x reader

[imthursdaysyme]

Sleepover shenanigans

#drawing #steve harrington #stranger things #robin buckley #stobin #they were in her room arguing like old married couple #listen steve just doesn’t understand how she can’t do it bc he thinks she can do anything #he said what tf do you mean you don’t have abs and rob was like bestie I don’t work out they aren’t strong I’m a limo noodle #and he was like well girl get on that I don’t want you to die bc you didn’t keep your body healthy istg your worse than Henderson #and she was like HEY I do plenty of things such as ride my bike and he said ok then why are your thighs the size of my forearm #and he keeps yelling at her to use her core and she’s screaming at him that she’s trying #and he’s holding her leg #but we’ll rob flails and her heel whacked him in the eye so he feel back #hit the wall thought he was dead #dropped rob to the ground and shes cursing like an d man that had to get up from his chair #and she’s like why’d you drop me and he doesn’t respond so she looks over #and my man is out for the count with another black eye #she thinks she killed him and worries that after years of demogorgons and Russians the thing that kills Steve Harrington is #Robs sharp ass heel #she pushes him under the bed and covers him with blankets and then goes to sleep #except he wakes up at like 2am and she screams worse than when she saw a ud creature for the 1st time and whacks him back down and BAM #he is out again and now Robin is freaking out more bc omg she killed her platonic soulmate and he came back to life only for her to kill him #AGAIN #she wonders if she can be tried for double manslaughter on one man but how would they know? then rob realized she can’t testify bc #she’ll tell everything if she gets up on the stand and she won’t just be sentenced for life she’ll be sentence for TWO lives #but then she’s like omg I deserve two life sentences to honor Steve even though he wouldn’t be in jail she just assumes he goes with her #even her own prison sentence for his murder #the next time Steve wakes up he inches out and flips on her to tame her flailing limbs and she starts crying saying #I killed you twice but my love for you is so strong it brought you back a third time and steve is like you knocked me out shithead you didnt #murder me Jesus Christ and she’s like how do you k ow and he’s like omg how do I know

[gregoftom]

alright nero damn

#WHERE do i even start with this ohahnd m #ok first of all TOM why is your voice so fucking low???????????????????? like girl......... #i know he's being quiet but it's also so LOW. so murmuring...... so .... IntimateTM #the way they act so TETHERED to one another. the way greg is like OH YEAH for a second i forgot #i am bound to you. so am i gonna be okay bc are you? are WE? #YOURE GONNA GET CASTRATED ON PAY SHUT THE HELL UP NERO!!!!! I KNOW HE AINT SAY THAT ON ACCIDENT #he's still thinking about nero sporus he hasn't forgotten what he said to greg in that office he still feels the same way #greg is his sporus now and forever i'm suprised he didn't drop the sporus right there tbh #but i think i can keep you girl i KNOW that is all you are thinking about. that is a top fucking priority for you. you want to keep greg #at all costs. your job yeah you want that and all but the Real reason you want it all is to keep greg with you just SAY that #i mean. you did but still #also stop looking at him like that by talos!!!!!! it gets worse by the day i s2g #tom [looking at greg like he's his entire world]: die #ALSO THE WAAAAY HE TOUCHED GREG TWICE AFTER #cant just touch him once huh. touching his face tenderly is NOT ENOUGH i Must touch his shoulder too. more touching. he is mine btw #tomgreg

[eggbagelz]

gale voice here feel the pulse of the magic in my heart that will eventually be the end of me. im on my knees before you like an animal showing its belly. im in excrutiating pain bc of the contact with the magic in my heart but please dont take your hand away please dont stop touching me

#gale of waterdeep #paydja plays baldur's gate #the relationship a lot of the companions have with their bodies is fucking fascinating #but gale and karlach's relation to their heart and to human contact is particularly compelling #i cant say who has it worse bc thats a stupid comparison to make when they both have hearts that could literally detonate at any moment #[ik that karlach cant do human contact at all and gale cant but im talking abt emotionally significant contact which is smth they share] #but rn im focusing on gale ill talk abt karlach later #hes so interesting like hes initially played as arrogant but i think that whole thing with mystra #really fucked him up bc he talks abt himself like hes. not a means to an end per se but u get the gist #you can see the way he talks abt sense and sensuality and emotional connection but as soon as you actually offer it via flirting or just #genuine compliments hes always surprised and always changes the subject #partially out of like. emotiona damage and partially bc he doesnt want to go boom #ANYWAY WHAT IM SAYING IS hes in pain bc of the contact being made with the magic that makes up his heart but #by god please dont take your hand away. please dont stop touching him. please #i hate this fucking game i hate it so much #chattering #sorry for the analysis it WILL happen again #im talking abt gale rn bc hes my favourite and currently the character i know the most about via gameplay #but there is PLENTY i can say abt everyone #god i keep saying this but its like why are you so good sometimes and also so bad. fucking Larian.

[ultra-violetra]

so I wanted to say that since I'm really enjoying this event, I will likely continue to post about it, including analysis. I want to talk about the game mechanics and strategies but it's been so hard to do without people thinking you're talking about the discourse. I think as a community we all need to be a little less jumpy about this event, because I've seen posts of people being afraid to talk about the team their watching because they don't want to be dragged into discourse. I think a lot of genuinely lighthearted posts about a fun event are being misconstrued as something malicious

all of my posts are made with the spirit of friendly competition. a lot of other people are posting like this too! people should be able to do this without getting accused of hating ccs or being unfair

i've been posting a lot about red team, specifically because that's who i've been watching the most. i watch pretty much every english speaking qsmp member, it just so happens that right now i have a sub to foolish so i've been watching him so i don't have to deal with ads. because of this, i will probably continue to talk about red team the most. i'll talk about blue and green teams when i watch them! if i had the time to watch vods from every team and do a complete strategy analysis, i would. but I don't have that time. i genuinely don't care which team wins, but that doesn't mean I won't be rooting for certain teams on certain days. like on day 2, red team going from barely visible on the score bar to winning the day was an amazing underdog story! of course i'm going to root for them! and for day 3 I was rooting for green team because i want to see fitmc tryhard!

at the end of the day this is a fun event. it's fun for the ccs so it should be fun for the fandom. and if you're scrolling thru tags and getting upset/annoyed/angry at people posting about a friendly competition, you might need to reevaluate yourself

#really just posting this as a precaution bc I feel like people get mad at me for posting about strategies and it makes me sad #because i'm trying to have fun #and i would love to watch and support everyone but i cant there isnt enough time and i dont speak french #anyway let people support red team without getting jumped #they're just talking about their streamer like chill #like genuinely the way people are talking on here makes me feel bad for supporting red team #until i remember that i did nothing wrong they're just being mean #i get youre defensive but like YOU are the one creating discourse my guy #we're just over here talking #thought about switching it up for today and watching blue team but then i rememberd #i dont have to appease you i can do what i want #if i want to watch red team and talk about red team then i can do so #if you have a problem with that it's your own fault #sorry these tags are really sassy but like fr people need to chill #talking about the discourse all the time only makes it worse #and i want to keep talking strategy without having to defend myself constantly #because i hate when people intentionally misinterpet my words #ok rant over #qsmp

[mossflower]

how many breakdowns should you have about dropping out before you seriously consider dropping out. asking for a friend teehee

#shock horror. i am not asking for a friend #turns out going to uni bc you had no idea what else to do + taking a course you’re mostly interested in bc you like space #is not necessarily a good idea. who would have thought #see the thing is if this didn’t cost money i wouldn’t be so worried. but i don’t want to keep having this breakdown and eventually drop out #in like a year’s time with twice the amount of debt or whatever #rn now i keep looking on indeed like hmm. i could totally drive trains that would be an amazing idea. driving a milk float!! so slay!! #bc i realised shortly after getting here that i do not want to do a phd which basically rules out any astrophysics jobs #my mum suggested looking at summer placements but quite frankly i need to get a job over summer if i stick with my degree bc i am ✨broke✨ #rn i’m saying shit like oh i’ll just write a book and get it published. totally feasible way to make some quick cash (delusional)(knows it) #november has been hell i do not have a draft let alone a book #and i’m tired and i haven’t had a proper meal since thursday and my room is a tip #i‘ve had like three conversations with my friends in the past fortnight and none of them lasted longer than five minutes #i was so fucking excited for uni!! it was going to be so good!! i feel bad for wanting to drop out bc i don’t hate it!! #i just don’t really like it either #god fucking damn it. this shit is worse than a sexuality crisis. at least they had zero real world impact bc i was an antisocial fucker #this is the rest of my fucking life!! the hell!!

[lovesickeros]

Darling: you hate me, it's written all over your face

Reader's resting b*tch face: what?

darling says it just to annoy you lbr. bc no matter how bad your resting bitch face is, the tsaritsa's is worse. darling has had years to learn how to discern the tsaritsa's mood when shes as reactive as a statue.

#asks #pale-value #sagau #tsaritsa #darling #in the tsaritsa's defense it isnt intentional shes just Like That. shes only expressive when she wants to be unnerving #bc whats scarier then blank faced tsaritsa staring you down? tsaritsa smiling. start counting bc you have seconds left #its like 99% body language and its all extremely subtle though. its an art form atp #80% of that body language btw is her ears. its why she hides them bc they give it away so EASILY. #reader being as stone faced is a challenge to darling though. like oh worm??? bet #darling thrives off chaos bc its the only entertainment they get when ur literally g-d #especially if you do not give a shit abt them being the creator. it just makes everything Worse #they r keeping you in a container like a lab rat #also unrelated but im fully taking over darling sorry comrade. my oc now /j #ive been having brainrots abt worldbuilding w darling. they arent even an unreleased character like tsaritsa. im going 2 eat a brick #WHAT WORLD AM I BUILDING HERE. MY OWN PERSONAL HELL????????? #yes. i am. thanks for coming 2 my ted talk gn

[bunnihearted]

🏨🩹🧸

#tmrw im finally gnna talk to a doctor at the hospital abt potentially getting surgery #hopefully he'll agree and think surgery is the next step #bc as i understand it gallstones just dont go away on their own + they'll keep getting worse w time #and it's been 3.5 months now and my body has not worked properly at all. can barely even eat #so yeah i just dont have any faith in the health care system and that they even wanna help you #but i rlly rlly hope he'll say that surgery is what i need so i can be put on a waiting list #i just want my gallbladder removed so i can live hopefully as normal as possible again #there r so many symptoms and just .. yeah no i cant have it like this. need it to be over #and gallbladder surgery is a routine one and fairly easy an uncomplicated. the recovery is simple(er) as well #so hopefully this will all just go smoothly so i can be normal and healthy again. and be able to eat :< #but im worried that he wont agree on surgery and that i'll have to argue w him lol. im so worried that's gnna happen #if i just know that im on a waiting list and will get surgery within 3 months i'll be able to relax more #im super nervous for tmrw but just gnna have to do it and then i'll know what's next

[navramanan]

Isnt it crazy how yes, my liberation notes makes me feel seen in some parts, it also makes me want to die for the things that i dont have compared to the characters

#with that i specifically mean friends #is that really the one thing that will set me apart from everyone? #people will have relationship problems money problems job problems family problems #and all of them have friends. is it bc there really is no end in sight for any problem when you dont have friends? #i dont have anyone to talk to every evening about how my life is if i wanted to #sometimes i want to get it all out anyway and write it down somewhere #or on the very very rare occassion snap a friend. but i always feel like a left over person by doing that #i feel as if i'm so so desperate to talk to someone #lately i've been feeling lost in that gap i feel in my life #i have stopped hoping there's an end to this #at least for now i've stopped hoping. i hoped and tried and failed for so long i feel exhausted #i dont want to expect anything. bc then nothing comes out of it anyways and i feel awful just horrible. more than i would without expectatio #i dont know what's worse. to keep trying and hoping or to keep wandering around in that gap feeling lost #nesi rants

[hella1975]

choked up in my room rn bc i was sat in the car with my mum completely lost in thought and she out of nowhere went 'are you okay?' and i was like 'yeah? why?' bc i was totally fine i was literally just thinking and she let it go and then five entire minutes later she goes 'are you sure? have i done something?' and she sounded so genuinely anxious and i could tell she'd been thinking about it the entire 5 minutes while id been completely oblivious and i spent so many years as a child letting everything bottle up until it all burst out in a messy and ugly breakdown that took her down with me and despite that she never hated me she only ever blamed herself for not seeing the signs and she's never been able to see my signs because i keep everything to myself and it terrifies her that she might miss something and she handles things poorly when she's scared and she gets too angry but fundamentally she's trying her absolute hardest to be a good mother and it wasn't always enough and i know i have to hold her at least partially accountable but also she's my mum and im her daughter and she always just wants to know if im okay and most of the time im not and somehow that feels like ive betrayed her

#like my mum is such a loud powerful force of a woman that these little moments of vulnerability where she's just HONEST with me #and she shows me that she's worried or scared or unsure instead of just constantly putting up a strong front #always always bowl me over #like ive literally said to her time and time again that i'd find it easier to communicate with her if she wasn't so strong all the time #like of course i hate crying and being emotional in front of you when youve made it v clear my whole life that you hate doing that #when it's you that's the one being emotional like that's not fair #but also being strong all the time is literally a survival thing she had no choice but to implement bc her own life was so hard #so how can i just ask her to lower those walls for me? even if keeping them up is to both our detriment? #and like ive talked on here before how she's openly admitted to me that she finds my temper harder to handle than my sister's #even tho mine is quieter and significantly less messy. but she's also said to me that in general she finds my sister easier to deal with #bc my sister's so open and if she's angry she yells if she's sad she cries if she's happy she talks ur ear off etc etc #i just insist on handling everything myself and the worse i feel the more i deal on my own and it TERRIFIES my mum #BECAUSE it's led to mistakes in the past but also just bc i have never ever doubted that she has so much love for me in her heart #like even when our relationship was at its worst it was never ever a lack of love and she just does genuinely care and worry about me #it's just if she's scared she just gets ANGRY and her angry means her hurting my feelings and my feelings being hurt means i shut down MORE #and it's literally the worst combo but we love each other so much that we're both clawing through it anyway it makes me want to cry #and because she's always so strong i FORGET that there's just a scared vulnerable person behind those walls #that has no idea what she's doing bc her own mum never taught her anything good #and my mum blames herself so completely for every bad thing like she says things like 'i feel like ive failed' and idk how to tell her #that she IS messy and incredibly flawed and she HAS done things that have hurt me beyond comprehension #and there are bad parts of my personality that exist because of her and her alone #but ive also done terrible things to her too like not even considering the fact our responses arent compatible and that hurts her #i also did some DUMB shit when i first started tackling ye olde mental illness that had a HUGELY negative impact on everyone around me #but she is still my favourite person in the world and my best friend and i love her and i know she loves me and i just want to hold her #girls when their mum isnt an all powerful being but instead a flawed human trying their best: SKJDGHKDJSHGJKSDHGJKSH #hella goes home

[laughingtale]

tag rambling ab latest chapter (again) bc i am normal always

#one piece spoilers #op spoilers #1095 #OOC. #[ my brain is so fried these days im so sorry but still processing everything #[ like?? okay just. first off framky <3 #[ but also holy shit. kuma...... i know we all wanted to know more ab kuma but at what price--- #[ jfc just when you think celestialdragons couldnt get any worse though fr..... #[ POSSIBLE. POSSIBILY. GOD VALLEY FLASHBACK. REAL. #[ IF WE DO SEE GARP N ROGER... #[ i wish i was capable of being insane in a manner beyond sitting in a corner of a room staring at a wall #[ sniffs. these blogs bare the brunt of my blorbo thoughts apologies </3 #[ but also just rat shaking putting them in a salad spinner #[ slams fist on floor etc etc #[ like??? still been meaning to talk ab the garp chapters bc head in HANDS. #[ <- so slow at processing things / IRL burning me out but we stay silly (putting peepaw in the plinko) #[ everything keeps happening all of the time etc. so on

[themyscirah]

Started thinking about the Amanda Waller + Ben Turner relationship again.... fuck, I'm gonna need a minute

#I JUST- SHDIAUDJSHDSHEYEYRYRYRY guys. guys #i know none of you see my vision and thats okay. i will make you see my vision. i will force you to see my vision. i will- #like jesus fucking christ oh my god. its so interesting and gives me so many emotions and just!!! #i know im not making sense bc none of my moots are sui sq fans and also like half of the content fucking me up specifically here is in my #head because i cant stop thinking about my absolute power fix it au but like!!!!!!! #also the fact i have a fix it for a comic that isnt out yet is so funny to me. its literally fucking real though. god knows we need it #may my own content carry me through the dark times (extreme villain waller arc) #anyways this fucks me up so bad you dont even know. someday ill actually explain it #dc hire me to write a suicide squad ongoing PLEASE. i could do it so good it would be so fucking good dc PLEASE 😭😭😭😭😭😭 #also like this isnt me shipping them btw. like 110% not that. just to clarify. #i wouldnt even call it a friendship bc like. theyre not friends really. he has the most equal dynamic with her i would say but it still isnt #equal. shes v much his boss even though they have an understanding and respect there #like she believes and trusts in him much more than anybody really even himself. like she sees the good man and the leader even when he #doesnt. but she isnt nice about it. and there is a lot of conflict between them when there needs to be #like as much as ben is “wallers man”--the team leader she wanted from the beginning before rick flagg pushed his way in #ben i would say is still a very moral person even when lost and unsure of himself and his goodness (which is like one of his main things) #like i feel like while amanda can lean very into a “the ends justify the means” mindset in her worse moments and do bad things to get #herself out of a corner ben has like a deep and meaningful understanding of how the choices of your methods and how you act can weigh on you #like even though he was brainwashed and whatnot (thats still the story right? i cant remember) he holds a lot of guilt and baggage over his #actions and i think is able to temper amanda's worse tendencies in terms of that by calling her out when he recognizes that behavior #idk. i just really think that amanda waller and the suicide squad as a whole has lost its way without a more moral authority presence there. #like someone who can call her out and keep them more on track. which i really thing ben is and could be #i just very much am interested in their dynamic and how that would look like as equals and how i think they could help each other. #which ofc is what my wip is about and revolves around #blah #sui sq

[chaosinstigator]

if y’all love and appreciate daniel's input on the team so much... why not repay him in the form of a car he can actually drive

#dr3 #daniel ricciardo #visa cashapp racing bulls #vcarb #visa cashapp rb #f1 #last year he was fucking taken out by other peoples parts on track and so far this year its his own team who claims to work to improve #the problems hes presenting to them only to unlock new ones/other ones instead like #the fuckin floor thing yknow how he prefers to drive by now surely why the fuck would you do this when you know itll make things worse #make it make sense?! #anyways i was happy w peters interview but now im just tired yall cant keep praising him and then pulling this crap do you know how #irritating it is to have to keep reminding people of his technical issues bc they keep happening ofc people are gonna be dicks about it bc #they just want a reason to talk shit they dont bother actually getting into whats going on adsfgh sorry sorry im pissed off actually #barely 5 am and im already fumin its gonna be fun to watch quali ey #joey rambles #i just want him in the fuckin redbull already we know he can drive it we saw the proof last year he can pull podiums with that one GIVE HIM #THE GOD DAMN REDBULL #FUCK

[holyviolence]

omg i spent the whole day cleaning my entire apartment because my family was coming to visit and 1) so so so happy my adhd is being medicated now it's literally changing my life and 2) i FINALLLY got through to my dad about how he probably has ADHD too!!!!! he finally said Yeah i think i might have adhd. and my mom was like Me too (we've had this talk privately before, she knows she has adhd too lol) And my brother is literally transferring to a different school because he can't concentrate and isn't disciplined at his current uni. adhd family.

#literally thank goodness my brother was here to like Perfectly describe in real time what happens to adhd people when they go to college for #the first time. there's less structure and you fall apart. i used that as an opportunity. #i've slowly slowly slowly been chipping away at my Entire family btw. i've finally convinced my dad that medication is a GOOD THING. #i said You know. there's a lot in life that you feel like you Have to live with. but being on meds has made life so much easier and happier. #and that's when my dad finally said it. #:^) sometimes i like..... think about my family and how complicated i feel because growing up was super tough with all of them but now they #are all better people..... and i can't help but feel proud because as much as it is ABSOLUTELY great job for THEM for getting there But i #also feel uhhh partly responsible because i was constantly calling them out for shit. not always in the best way #but always standing up for others and challenging them on their worldviews and just casually talking about more liberal (as in free. not #politically) things. yes i do feel like if it wasn't for me my family would be worse people #i KNOW one of my brothers would be because he literally told me so. and it makes me happy. it is proof that my life is worthy and i have a #good impact on the world. it doesn't have to be a big thing i do to change things..... because i believe in the Ripple Effect #my dad is a teacher and he uses the proper pronouns for his trans students without complaint now. that has a good impact on SO many people #the trans students and their classmates who hear their teacher respect them. my brother is no longer homophobic he's bi lol and #if i hadn't argued with him about what bisexuality meant bc he was Wrong when i was 18 and he was 16... i wonder.... #my younger sister is one of the nicest kids i've ever met and i partly raised her. it feels great to see her be such a good kid #her best friend is a trans girl and when she first came out my sister was one of two people in their class who still wanted to be #her friend. #idk. just inspires me to keep being the best person i can be & always do what's right even if it makes people mad #bc no one can hurt me as much as my family has traumatized me (lol) and look what happened to them!! i didn't give up! and i see real change

[bijoumikhawal]

Elim Garak 🤝 Hua Cheng

You are really lucky the guy you like is as weird as you are and into the shit that you do, because goodness gracious

#cipher talk #Elim 'expresses love by cutting himself and others open before you even ask on the assumption it's what you want' Garak #Vs Hua 'I literally carved hundreds of very big statues of him and refused godhood partially bc he is my God and I am his Worshipper' Cheng #Tbf I think Hua Cheng is worse but that's because he's allowed to be canonically gay and can do things like give Xie Lian a pendant made of #His literal cremains and keep the lock of hair that Xie Lian tied around his finger as a magic amulet forever #If garak was canonically queer. Well one I'll be honest I do not trust the shows writing team to not have sucked. #It's like the reani conundrum. If it was canon it would have achieved the goal of boundary pushing in a much more meaningful way than just #nudity and graphic depictions of SA but I'm Glad It Wasn't because it would've been so homophobic. Seriously the second you remember #the AIDS crisis was going on outright villainizing a gay man obsessed with curing death gets way more fucked up #But Garak would certainly aspire to Hua Cheng's level of weird. I think they have somewhat comparable views of love/loyalty/devotion

[cheekblush]

unfortunately it's still so fucking over 😔

#did not have a restful night's sleep at all #only slept for 5 hours and woke up with swollen eyes and the headache still isn't gone #my mom keeps saying that i have to pull through and that it's always difficult being the new one but i refuse being treated this way #the problem is i can't just quit bc i received a scholarship from them & agreed to work full time for a year in return #i could pay back the scholarship with interest charges but i don't want to spend my entire savings on that #i found a really good job offer from another pharmacy but it doesn't really make sense to apply there since i'm still tied to my current.. #pharmacy for 11 months #but i'm scared that once those 11 months are up i won't be able to find such a good job offer again #tbh it sounds too good to be true bc it claims you only have to work 4 days a week and no saturdays that would be ideal #but i doubt there will still be such an offer in a year... i really don't know what to do i'm so indecisive :( #i uses to really enjoy working in my pharmacy despite the long working hours and even having to work full saturdays.. #but it's just getting worse every week and i can't stand to work with one of my colleagues anymore she's just insufferable #my concerns are not taken seriously and i'm clearly taken advantage of and treated poorly bc i'm the new one #☁️